Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang - "Address Her Correctly!" (w/ Dr. Wendy Osefo)

Episode Date: November 24, 2021

An ode to shooting your shot in the DMs, this episode is one for the ages. Because Las Cultch welcomes the one, the only, the zen... Dr. Wendy Osefo! Matt, Bow and Wendy discuss how she got involved with the Real Housewives of Potomac, the experience of pursuing your dreams and negotiating those dreams with the expectations of immigrant parents, Wendy's Nigerian upbringing, and seeing a reality TV depiction of yourself out there for people to judge. Also, Clueless and the icon that is Dionne, Lil Kim and Britney Spears, and putting family first. All that, what it was like to get absolutely dragged by Nicki Minaj, and an I Don't Think So Honey from Dr. Wendy that Matt and Bow agree is one of the finest in recent memory. Pre-order Wendy's book Tears of My Mother: The Legacy of My Nigerian Upbringing now, get yourself some Onyi Home Essentials and tune into the final part of The Real Housewives of Potomac reunion when it airs this Sunday! Tick tock. rea-ders! Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Real Housewives of New York City are back for another bite of the Big Apple. Look who it is. Joined by elite new friends. Rebecca Minkoff. Have you ever heard of her? But things could change in a New York Minute. She had this wild night and ended up getting pregnant by some other guy. What?

You told her? Not today, Satan. Not today. The Real Housewives of New York City. All new Tuesdays at 9 on Bravo or stream it on City TV+. I'm NK, and this is Basket Case. What is wrong with me? A show about the ways that mental illness is shaped by not just biology.

Swaps of different meds. But by culture and society. By looking closely at the conditions that cause mental distress, I find out why so many of us are struggling to feel sane, what we can do about it, and why we should care. Oh, look at you giving me therapy, girl. Listen to Basket Case every Tuesday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hey, friends. I'm Jessica Capshaw. And this is Camilla Luddington. And we have a new podcast, Call It What It Is. You may know us from Graceland Memorial, but did you know that we are actually besties in real life? And as all besties do, we navigate the highs and lows of life together. Big or small, we're there. And now here we are opening up the friendship circle to you.

Listen to Call It What It Is on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, I'm Bruce Bozzi. On my podcast, Table for Two, we have unforgettable lunch after unforgettable lunch with the best guest you could possibly ask for. People like David Duchovny, Jeff Goldblum, and Kristen Wiig. We're doing all the dessert. We're doing all the dessert dessert we'll just skip right to it our second season is airing right now so you can catch up

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get your podcasts look Matt where? oh I see wow Bowen look over there! Is that culture? Las Culturistas!

Ding dong! Las Culturistas calling! Oh Bowen. Oh Matt. This is a major day. It's a major day. I have the Onyi lit. I have the King candle lit in front of me. Let me tell you something. I'm looking over there at the Iyom candle. It's lit across from me. Of course, everyone, all of our readers know

that my house is decked out in Onye Home Essentials, the only essential home line. I have a question to ask. Have you ordered your five wick or seven wick? I think the nine is out. I might be mistaken on the catalog on the offer. No, I don't think there's a nine just yet. There could be. staking on the catalog on the off-road? No, I don't think there's a nine just yet. There could be. Of course, I ordered two five-wicks and they're on the way to my apartment. They are on the way. I got matching ones for me and Sudi

and I could not be more excited. The Zen Wen of New Line. The New Line. Okay, well, is there anything that we should, just any housekeeping we should get out of the way first? I feel like we're just kind of diving head first into the guest and I have no qualms about that at all. I have no qualms about that.

This episode is not just an episode of podcasting, but it's a testament to why you always have to shoot your shot in the DMs, okay? This is why that you have to go for it in life. I would say in terms of housekeeping, it's definitely Oscar season. I mean, I've definitely seen some films. I'm actually in the middle of, have you heard of this film Passing? Yes. By Rebecca Hall.

This has our favorites. This has Tessa Thompson. And Ruth Nega. Yes. It's exquisite. I'm watching it right now. I actually just watched King Richard the other day with Will Smith. That was amazing about the Williams sisters. Everyone's got to stream that on HBO Max. Will Smith is unbeatable for the Oscar, I would say. That might be a film I watch with the parents. They understand what's going on visually just enough. You got to understand. Anyone out there with immigrant parents where there's sort of a language barrier,

you got to just watch something that's visually stimulating to sort of get them. Can I just say something? I took my parents to go see Hamilton when they were in town for my birthday. Poor dad fell asleep in the first act and I kind of got upset at him. I was like, dad, how can you fall asleep to this?

It's so loud. Yeah, that's the thing. It's so loud. There's so much going on. There's such loud explosive performance and even some effects. And even some effects. I mean, I think we went to go see Les Mis in London and I think he was like- Many booms in that show. There's another circular stage on this one, Dad. Like, what gives? I think if you're watching stuff this holiday season with your family, if they have a hard time, you know, staying compelled to watch something,

just do something big, bright, fun, like King Richard. I'm just saying. The tennis is popping off in King Richard. The tennis is popping off. I think this is, I'm really excited to watch this. I'm saving it for the holiday. It's a really good one. It is a crowd pleaser.

And it's such an amazing story. I mean, Will Smith is great. Anjanue Ellis, who plays Oracene Price, their mother is great. The girls who played the Williams sisters are amazing. And it's just, obviously, we all know how the story ends, but it's kind of nice to see how the story begins. Like, it's really very winning. And it's a triumph, I would say. I love it. And then I also saw an early screening of the film Don't Look Up, the new Netflix movie that's coming out, the new Adam McKay,

and that was It Will Stay With You. So look out for that one too. But basically, none of this is as important. No, I think we should just get right into it. I think we should get right into it because really the pop culture moment is really Housewives of Potomac reunion happening right now. And our guest, I don't know about you, Bowen, but when I turned on Housewives of Potomac, the first episode of the reunion, and I saw who was sitting right on Andy's right. Right next to Andy. I said, absolutely. And someone who does not take that positioning lightly, in a literal sense, like, she knows the placement, the

meeting behind the placement, and, oh my God. New star of the show, basically. They said, Karen Huger, move over. Well, I just want to say, you remember, beginning of season five, we were watching it together or just checking in with each other.

And I was just like, Wendy's got it. I was like, Wendy's got it. I love this. I love this. From the first episode, I'm like, I'm very interested. And honestly, not to like be reflected too much in this, but I go, it is actually very meaningful to have this housewife

who has this interesting relationship with her mother as this immigrant who expected a lot of her and who has opinions about her career path. I was like, this is extremely powerful to watch on a TV show like The Real Housewives. And I hope that it like has sort of broadened people's scopes on like what that is. Speaking of her mother, she has a book coming out, Tears of My Mother, The Legacy of My Nigerian Upbringing. It's out in May of 2022. You can pre-order now. Pre-order now. We've been waving around our Oni Home Essentials.

I've got the Oni, the namesake candle right here. A lot of it is sold out right now, which is a great sign. That means she's in demand. That means she's in demand, but we've been over that already. What else, Matt? Political commentator and obviously the star right on Andy's right on that couch on The Real Housewives of Potomac.

And I don't think we could be more excited to welcome, and let's address her correctly. Please welcome into your ears, Dr. Wendy Osepo! Here we go. Oh my gosh, I'm so glad to be here

we cannot even tell you how excited we are i mean when i when i look down at my phone it was it was a better dm you know response than i've gotten from any gay man whose dms i've slipped in i loved it i loved it i was like I am honored it's so funny because when you reached out to me I was like they want me I feel so honored you're the first housewife we've ever had are you serious? I hear so many great things

about your podcast and even when I put it in my insta story people are like oh I love that podcast I'm like I know I'm so excited well it's our honor You know, like people like, oh, I love that. I'm like, I know. Well, it's our honor. It's our honor. What are you talking about? It's my honor. I mean, honestly, like, thank you. Thank you. Oh, my gosh. This is too much. How are you spending this this holiday week, Wendy? What's what's on that? What's on the agenda?

I'm so Thanksgiving is coming up Thanksgiving is like a blip for my family and I think it's because of the two different cultures like Nigerians we don't do Thanksgiving we do it here in America but it's like okay let's get over this hump so we can get to the big shebang which is Christmas so Christmas is like big for us but this week is spent like decorating the house like they you know, the peoples as I like to call them, came in and judged up the home for us. And I'm behind on grading for my students. And it's fall break at Hopkins. And so I'm catching up on my gradebook. So that's my life this week. What is the grade book these days?

Is it, because I think there's, I kind of yearn for the days of, remember someone tweeted this, like remember when you would peek at the physical grade book on your, let's just say like you're in grade school, elementary school, middle school, when you would peek over at that grid page

and it'd be like 195, whatever. And you just like get a sense of yourself. Now it's all electronic i assume yes it's all electronic you know i put no peaking and no peaking and then it's it's like every assignment has a different weight so i'm i hate math i'm not good at math so i'm like okay this is only worth five points so now i'm using my little calculator on my iPhone. Like, so what's the three out of five? Is that a, is that a, or is that B was like, so I, I despise it.

Nothing is out of a hundred. Like, let's go back to everything's out of a hundred. No, no, no. The entire semester is out of a hundred. So everything is broken down.

Sorry. I'm a, I'm a millennial professor and it comes out in my aggravation at all faculty meetings. They hate me. No, but I have to ask. So like you, are you back in the classroom now or is it still all virtual? So the good news is the program I teach in was always virtual. Every once in a while, I did face-to-face classes. So it didn't, the pandemic really didn't impact my teaching

because we've always been virtual. It's just that in the spring, I'll pick up one or two classes that are face-to-face because the weather is nice. I like to be on campus. But now I'm like, hell no, I'm not in the classroom. I'm not doing that. No, no, no, no. You were saying how your students, some of your students, mostly your students are very aware, but keep the the distance between you being on them being aware that you're on the show but you've had a couple be like hey um i had this question about public affairs stuff whatever but then what's the deal with robin and giselle or whatever and you're like

i can't tell you that i swear the conversations for the most part and when i say most part i mean like 99 of my students they don't question they don't say anything is completely professor student relationship but then you always have those few who will say something like hey i was looking at page three of the syllabus and i wanted to know about the final exam and whether karen huger is really shooting in syria i'm like how did we get here she's really shooting in surrey that is like, how did we get here? How did we go from the syllabus to Siri and peanuts? I'm so confused. And it escalates that quickly. It's now been like a period between the syllabus conversation and then the Karen Hugo conversation. It's like a running thought. And I'm just like,

okay, all right. Doesn't that put something on you to be like well I can't think any differently of this student I can't let the professor student relationship be affected by what they just brought into this like I feel like that puts the onus on you to like I don't know like brush it off is that fair to say yeah no I I always I what i do what i have learned is i answer whatever question they have about the course and i put lol i saw your last question you have to stay tuned smiley face there's literally a copy and paste i love it it's literally a copy and paste i put for everything just to say i acknowledge it i get it but lol smiley facey face. I mean, what can I say? They want to know about

Candice's album. They want to know if they could come to the album release. I'm like, girl, no, you cannot come to the album. I have to say, I was on Instagram this morning and she posted a little bit of her singing Alone by Heart. The vocals are there and they've always been there and I really like

the album and Drive Back has basically become the theme song to this podcast but she's got the real chops like there's and I saw her on Kelly Clarkson and she killed it. I think she did well I think she killed it. I think that you know if nothing else I'm happy

for her chasing what she loves and what she has been doing since she was younger. No shade to anyone but you know if nothing else i'm happy for her chasing what she loves and what she has been doing since she was younger no shade to anyone but you know candace is not like okay i'm on this platform now what i'm going to start singing no she has pictures of her singing since she was little so i'm i'm always a big proponent of people chasing their dreams no matter what it is so i'm glad she's doing that. Yeah. It's been really interesting, like,

because from the first season to the second season, obviously, it's like, it's almost like a Wendy 2.0. There has been, like, this glow up, if you pardon me using the expression. But what I really loved about it is, like, it is actually a progression from season one, if you really think about it. It doesn't really come come out of nowhere because you've been saying since the first season that there was parts of you that you've been wanting to explore that you've maybe been hesitant to explore in the past because you do have this relationship with your mother and with your you

know Nigerian upbringing that sort of prevents you from stepping outside the box too, too much because you have this expectation with yourself, with your mom, with your culture. So I actually think it's not really coming too far outside the box because you already made the big decision to be on a program like The Real Housewives of Potomac. And then it shouldn't feel too surprising for anyone like your castmates or anyone that's watching to see you also branch out into things that housewives have done in the past that we shouldn't be surprised your interests like Home Essentials. So what would you have to say to people that are like still on this narrative of but where's this new Wendy coming from? Yeah, I mean, I honestly would say to them you know look at how we ended season five season five it ended with myself having the conversation with my mom she gave me her blessings so to speak

and said you know what i'm proud of you go chase your dreams so if you stop it there and you pick up from season six it's like okay so now i'm living for me. And in our culture, people may not know this, but part of the expectation is not just education, but for women, it's also family. And I finally had a girl. That was like the full circle moment. Like you have your two boys, you have your girl, you've completed what you were set out to do as a Nigerian woman. Now go live. I have nothing else to beg of you because you have the degrees, you have the children, you have the husband. Now go live and live. I did. And I don't

know who else didn't get plastic surgery while we were in the pandemic. It's like the perfect time to heal. It's like the perfect time to heal. I mean, I know so many of my friends i didn't get i did it okay that's what i'm saying like i got a new nose yeah that's what i was about to say so many people got new noses because we had masks on so i just i mean i get it and i and i'm not faulting people because i do understand if you leave somewhere as memory serves you you're thinking about the professor and and let me speak to that too i feel like culturally and when i say culturally i mean as a society we put people in professions in boxes if you're a professor you look like this if you're a doctor you look like this and so here i am this professor and i got my tits out and it's like wait this this is not this is not what we were

ingrained to believe and I love I love music and Nas has this song um has this lyric on hate me now with him and Diddy and he says people fear what they don't understand and that's the truth when we don't understand something it's almost like wait that's not what. When we don't understand something, it's almost like, wait, that's not what I was talking. That doesn't make sense. That's not registering. It is what it is. How do you feel like you can like assuage that fear in people, though? Not that it's your responsibility, but I kind of feel this way sometimes not to like, I don't know, lionize myself or anything, but like, I feel like I kind of always every single day,

Wendy, feel that way about like, I don't think an audience watching, you know, this show that I'm on really knows what to make of this like queer Asian guy. And so that's why like, that's where a lot of their anger comes out and their frustration. They like vent all of these weird things onto me. And I'm like, oh, it's just because you've never seen someone like me before and that's okay. But I kind of think about this with everybody. I'm like, how do you sell yourself to people when they just are kind of coming into this by default saying, I don't get their whole deal?

What I have come to realize, and I'm not all knowing, is I feel like our biggest form of revolution is just to exist. Because I don't know about you, I didn't see me growing up. I never saw a professor who was yes, a professor, but also very confident in her sexuality in a public space. And I think that it always sucks being the first. I'm not saying I'm the first, but sometimes when you have such a big platform, it puts you on this pedestal that you

are now. It's isolated. Yeah. isolated yeah this person yeah and if i can like just reach out to everyone who has reached out to me and said thank you i i'm i'm a doctor i'm a pharmacist i'm a firefighter and you have allowed me to live in my truth to say i don't have to go with the label or the stereotype that comes with me, then that's what I have done. That, that, that is my contribution to the conversation because people need to see us. People need to see you existing in your truth because when they don't, then we are helping continue the narrative of what people who look like us, think like us, love like us, are

supposed to act like. And that's not helping at all. Wendy, this is it. This is why you tune in. This is why you watch her talking head on the political shows. This is the power. I would say, like, when you came on

the show, and I remember you were on Watch What Happens Live one time, and Andy said, I'm so proud to have you as a housewife. I really do think, I remember him saying that, and I was like, yeah, it really is. You are a different kind of real housewife. And so I was wondering, how did it come to you? Did they, were they scouting? Did you have a friend on the show?

Because I know often it's like you know they try to make it so that it feels like a real friend group but how did it come to you and i wonder what the process of you accepting the role on the show was like because it had to be a consideration yeah so it's it's funny because i knew i had met two of the ladies prior to even being in this universe type of thing. But I had someone who, I mean, I don't even have a title for them. They're a connector. And I was in New York filming a political segment. And she said, hey, would you ever do reality TV?

And I said, I don't know, but never say never. I am a big YOLO type of person. And so she said, okay, I want you to meet some people. And so I had a meeting with some of the head honchos for the production company that does Potomac. And what I thought would be a 30 minute meeting ended up lasting for hours. And we had a great conversation and after that conversation they were like we love you and the rest is history but i didn't go into it i i didn't you know apply to a casting call or anything like that it was really a friend who said would you ever consider this and at that point i i was at a really weird space in my career, meaning I have been doing political commentary for so long. And I was like, okay, what's next for me? And I said, whatever I do next, I have to do it quickly because I know that my biological clock in my head, for me, is ticking and I want to have one more baby so when she presented the opportunity to me I was like yeah sure and the reason I added that last piece is when we came home from New York my whole family

was with me from that meeting that week we conceived Cameron and so it was just like this weird alignment because if if I would have conceived her prior to the meeting I don't think I would have taken it you know because I would have been like prior to the meeting, I don't think I would have taken it, you know, because I would have been like, Oh motherhood, you know, this is perfect.

You know, my last one, let me just take it easy. But literally at like when we came back, she was conceived. And so it's, it's just so funny how, you know,

destiny works and how everything lined up. And then that explains the because I think the timing, am I getting this right? You guys shot season five, like two months after Cameron was born. Yes. Cameron was born in July. Production came knocking on my door in August and we started filming the first week of September. And so it just, and I remember my interview with the executives, they said, would you have any other kids?

Would you consider? And I said, yeah, I would want one more. I want a girl. And I even said, I want a girl and I want to have her now because I want her to be able to walk by the time me and my husband celebrate our 10 year wedding anniversary.

Literally. Wow. That is planning. That says it all. Yeah. So here we are. Yeah. This fall on Bravo.

It's time to turn up. Think you've seen it all? I don't think you've been a good friend to me lately. We're friends like that. Who needs enemies? You ain't seen nothing yet. Cheers to being Germanic. With the Real Housewives of Potomac.

Oh my gosh, can I take this in? It's gonna be amazing. New York City. Everyone is a gossip. No one gets a happier life. Salt Lake City. We don't wear costumes, we wear fashion. And below deck sailing out.

You broke the rules and now you're here getting upset. Watch all new seasons on Bravo or stream it on City TV+. Let's have a real good time. Hey, friends. I'm Jessica Capshaw. And this is Camilla Luddington. And we have a new podcast, Call It What It Is. You may know us from Graceland Memorial, but did you know that we are actually besties in real life?

And as all besties do, we navigate the highs and lows of life together. And what does that look like? A thousand pep talks. A million I've got yous. Some very urgent I'm coming overs. Because, I don't know, let's face it, life can get even crazier than a season finale of Grey's Anatomy. And now here we are, opening up the friendship circle. To you.

Someone's cheating? We've got you on that. In-laws are in-lying? Let's get into it. Toxic friendship? Air it out. We're on your side to help you with your concerns. Talk about ours.

And every once in a while, bring on an awesome guest to get their take on the things that you bring us. While we may be unlicensed to advise, we're going to do it anyway. Listen to Call It What It Is on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I felt too seen. Dragged. I'm N.K., and this is Basket Case. So I basically had what back in the day they would call a nervous breakdown. I was crying and I was inconsolable. It was just very big, sudden swaps of different meds.

What is wrong with me? Oh, look at you giving me therapy, girl. Finally, a show for the mentally ill girlies. On Basket Case, I talk to people about what happens when what we call mental health is shaped by the conditions of the world we live in. Because if you haven't noticed, we are experiencing some kind of conditions that are pretty hard to live with. But if you struggle to cope, the society that created the conditions in the first place will tell you there's something wrong with you. And it will call you a basket case. Listen to Basket Case every Tuesday on

the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Once again, we find ourselves in an unprecedented election. And with all that's happening in the lead up to the big day, a weekly podcast just won't cut it. Get a better grasp of where we stand as a nation every weekday on the NPR Politics Podcast. Here are seasoned reporters dig into the issues that are shaping voters' decisions and understand how the latest updates play into the bigger picture. Listen to the NPR Politics Podcast on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Back to talking about your mother, like, talk about, about like how liberating that was because i i do relate

to that a lot too where like i grew up all the way through college thinking i have this i am duty bound to what my parents want from me in my career and it was this real mad yeah i was pre-med and then matt Matt remembers this moment where I was, I fully fell into this depression after we graduated college where I was like, I don't think I want to go

to med school. I think I might try to pursue this showbiz thing. And he was going to go home to Denver. And I remember I had seen Bowen perform all throughout college.

And I was like, that is absolutely not happening. And we said, I, we, we basically anchored Bowen to New York to keep him performing, but it was a big thing for you.

But it was this huge conversation that I had to have with my parents where they weren't even like, I don't think they ever gave me the blessing to like do this, but even just that tiny, tiny, like interstitial space that I found to be like, okay, well,

you're not saying that you're gonna disown me if I do this so I'm gonna I'm gonna do it was like such a such a moment I think in like in like the first generation development of people and so I don't know like what was that like having that conversation with your mother having having cameras roll, and then like making the decision, like how soon was it after that where you decided I'm going to go for everything that I want to go for? Wow, that's a powerful question. It's actually funny because I said to myself, I can only have this conversation with her with cameras rolling because I know she won't tell me in front of people. So that was like my safety net. So people didn't know that because I think she won't kill me in front of people so that was like my safety net so people didn't know that because I think sometimes we have like these hard conversations and people

like well it's kind of weird that you're having this because even this season I had a conversation with my mom during the photo shoot and people were like why is she talking about this in front of her mom in front of a photo shoot because she can't kill me when people are there and there was a distance too you were horizontal on the chaise and she was like all the way over there so she couldn't make it to you uh but you know having having that conversation was really hard for me because bowen as you said it's like for for for me being a first gen is so hard because you're straddling two worlds and in my book tears of my mother i talk about how first generations we often straddle two worlds to the to the point that i propose that we create

a new name for the for the third world in a sense right that we're straddling because one feed is here another feed is here but we occupy that middle space. And it's something that I feel like only us know. And it was so hard for me. And I clap for you because at least you went and chased your dreams. I didn't start chasing my dreams until I accomplished everything that she wanted me to. And part of that first step was actually doing the Royal Housewives because she couldn't say no, because I've already been a professor. I've already received my degrees. I've already been married. I've already had kids. And so it was hard for her to say no, because it's like,

you've done what you need to do. And I think what's really important that some people may not understand is I understand that for everyone your children are your pride but for Nigerians in particular your children filled the gap for what you did to accomplish and so that's why they push us so hard because for us I have friends that their parents or their father are taxi cab drivers. And for their father, that's okay that that's all he achieved. But his child is now a medical doctor. So you cannot look down on him because of what his child has done and it's really a delicate balance because you know that your parents have sacrificed so much for you to be here but you want to live your own life but in the same breath you don't want to let them down because you know that they didn't accomplish what they wanted to

because they sacrificed for you yes and it's like this big mind oh my god it's just so horrible but i mean i don't have any you know i don't have any beautiful answers for it i just know that no that's a beautiful conceptualization of it though that's all people need i mean I just hope that the next generation, we as first gens for our children, we allow them to dream. I don't know if our parents allowed us to dream. And if I could pass any gift to my kids, I would say you can dream and you can dream big. You know, I will also say you have the most beautiful children. Every time your kids come on screen,

I just smile. And I just, it really is, they have such good energy. They seem like such happy kids. And obviously your husband is like a fan favorite at this point. I mean, we stan Eddie in this house. It's so funny you say that. Wait, let me see let me be a jodan mom so yesterday eddie and i went to parent teacher

conference for carter and cruz and we went to cameron's last week and their teacher for carter and cruz they they said you know your sons are so compassionate. Whenever they have a child struggling, you know, Carter, his teacher said, he's the first one to help. And Cruz's teacher said, he's the first one to help to the point that Cruz was out last week and the kid that he walks to the bus

to make sure his friend gets a bus, missed the bus because Cruz wasn't there. And the teacher's like, oh my God, I forgot Cruz didn't come to school today. So this kid missed the bus. The reason I'm telling this story is, here i am in my hoodie and in and leggings at this meeting crying like a baby because i'm like my kids you know even my daughter they said the same thing i'm like the one'm like, I want to be better because they have this trait and I

don't know why I don't have it. And I'm literally in the Eddie's looking at me like literally his face is like this. He's like, and then conference and he's like, it's not about you get yourself together. This is about the case. It's so funny. this conference and he's like it's not about you get yourself together this is about the kids that is so funny but in that moment i was just like oh my gosh like you know because at the core of this i want my kids to be successful yes yes yes but i just want to make good human beings and to hear that i was just like oh my god how did my parents fail me i'm'm not compassionate. No. No. But I do.

They did not. They did not. But I do want to ask, though, because whenever we have people that have been on reality television on the podcast, and we have had a few, one of the most fascinating questions,

I think, and everyone always gives a different answer, is when you see yourself edited to and depicted as a character. And, oh, my God, I can already tell it has to be such a mind fuck because you know even like when bone and i see ourselves on television playing characters

it's weird and then when you see yourself as yourself but it's also filtered through this you know need that the producers and editors have to make you into a part of the narrative i want to know what your experience is with that and how much you recognize yourself oh my gosh i can cry answering this question and i don't know why because i feel like oh gosh that's such a you know and you know the saying check on your strong friend so you you don't know it but like that's like you checking in because it's like oh no seriously because you know you play we we're on this show and everything we say we said it but everything has context and i feel like the viewers sometimes are not privy to the context or things are cut and spliced.

And so even if it was said in one way, now it's a whole nother way. So when I see myself, I feel like you guys see the worst version of me. It's who I am because I said those things, but that's not all I am. That's, that's, that's the piece, you know, like if you see me telling someone, Hey, don't, don't talk about my family. Yes. That's one piece, but the larger piece is because I am this mom who goes to PTA meetings and I care about my kids being compassionate and we do homework together. And I just want to make sure they're OK. And so when you talk about my family, you are touching my Achilles heel because the only thing in the world that can break me is my family.

But you don't get that piece. You don't get that story, that backstory you know yeah but i feel like if we're talking specifically about the williamsburg moment at the whiskey tasting matt and i met so matt was in town um this is one of the this is one of the few episodes where matt and i watched together and and that episode i mean i i had chills i mean matt you remember like i i held my breath that entire 10 minute span or whatever and like by the end like you and i were like on our feet just applauding clapping for wendy well you essentially you booked season 7 8 9 10 11 and 12 with that scene i mean it cemented the legend because and as fans,

of course, we want to see Giselle and Robin get dragged because, I mean, you know, as fans, and also saying this, you know, with compassion for them as the full human beings that they are, knowing that they're playing their roles, but I think that it would be disingenuous for any fan of the show to watch that

and feel like that was responsible of them to do because and now to see them play you know and not to get too too much into the narrative of the season because people can watch the reunion for that but i think it is really obtuse for them to not recognize what they've done when they bring something like that narrative onto the show which as you said goes from being known by hundreds of people to millions. Because as you've been saying, your family, as they grow older, can now recognize that this was a narrative on the show when it had absolutely no basis in truth. And so it is a lack of respect for you and you as a mama bear and as someone who's a proud person and a and like a lover of your husband like of course you're

gonna go all the way in and so yes we appreciate that moment because we love to see giselle get dragged for her foolishness and ashley you know be exposed as the henchman that she is on the show but also like i want you to know that we a hundred percent at least we bowen and i know where that comes from rooted in what you've been saying. Yeah, well, thank you guys. I appreciate that so much. We sign up for this show and we know what comes with it. We get it.

We understand it. But what I realized last year, the end of last year, is you have to know who you are when you come on this platform. Because if you don't, you will have millions of people telling you who you are. So you have to know who you are, because when I tell you, people will tell you, no, this is who you are. And for some people, they start to believe it so i am very i hold very close to my family and the people who don't win and the people who know me because when i say that i am you know eddie will tell you i'm the biggest softy ever um and it's so funny because i was watching the reunion and i guess new narrative they're trying to play is that I control him.

So, yeah, I guess they do do that. That's a new narrative because they have him answering the questions and like quick bites. But he literally gave gave a whole dissertation. And then at the very end, Andy asked me a question like, so, Wendy, what are your final thoughts on this? I said it. But then they played that in a way that I cut him off and I spoke for him and the whole world to say, well, why don't you let him speak? Why would you cut him off? I didn't.

I was asked the question. I was asked the question, but you didn't see that. Right. So it's those moments that you're just like, man, let me change the damn channel. I don't want to watch this. Let me change the channel. I know. Yeah.

Well, there's no way that it's not completely dissociative for you to watch yourself completely reshuffled, spliced, assembled differently, literally, in this real way and I think but with what you were saying earlier like I I bring up me and Matt watching it together because I think there are a lot of viewers who are watching a moment like that and thinking oh no I do actually see the nuance behind this moment that there is more to it than even this something so emotional and big and there's obviously conflict here but like I think there there is this implicit understanding of like what was going on what was at play like i i i completely understood where you were coming from personally yeah um and i don't know i feel like you've done a very remarkable job of like presenting the totality of yourself even though there's no way for a show like this to like

represent that yeah like on your behalf in the best way i feel like you do bring all of yourself to the show which is why i love you which is why i've gone on record to say that you're my favorite housewife oh i appreciate that oh i really appreciate that you know i think that for all of us we come into this and we just you know the hope is just to bear your soul and what eddie was telling me because he's my therapist um he told me you have to be your authentic self but with that you also have to know that people will digest you how they want to and you can't be mad at how someone digests you and that has stuck with me and you know i am just moving with the adage it's better to be hated for who i am than love for who i'm not so if this is me and you love it thank you if this is me and you hate it i'm sorry but at least i'm giving you who i really

am oh no don't apologize for it yeah Yeah, I feel like you really are, you do elevate the show, and I would say, like, obviously next week is the last episode of The Reunion, the end of this season, and it is hosted by Nicki Minaj. So before we ask the question of what was the culture that made you say

culture is for you, I want to know if you can tell us a little bit about the experience of being at a reunion hosted by nikki minaj and if you can tease how it went at all or just just explain what it's like to be in the presence of royalty truly the queen yes yeah oh my gosh so i i was just so taken aback because it's it's layered is layered because first it's okay. Nicki Minaj is hosting the reunion that in itself is like, whoa.

Yeah. The second piece is Nicki Minaj watches your show. Right. So it's, it's, it's really so many pieces to it. But once I found out that Nicki Minaj was going to be the guest, it was in that moment that you guys see the preview because she started out by sending us a video saying, I can't make it, but I love you guys. I was like, oh, and we knew the blurriest, the blurriest video in the world.

We bought that and I was completely OK. And I was honored by it because I'm like, she did a video for us is great let's move on let's get to the questions oh my god that's amazing yeah but if but i'll be lying to you if i didn't feel like something was up i i started to feel like something was up after our first break i don't know what it is i i blame everything on my mommy senses like i know my child could be upstairs i'm like carter's doing something bad i don't know why i just feel and i was like i i turned to candace and i was like i think nicki minaj is here i lied to you now she said what no i don't think so i said so she doesn't have that mommy sense yet something is going on

and i don't know and so when andy said the whole thing about i think i need a drink i was like she is here and it was such an amazing moment and just let the record show you're gonna see at the very end, something happens. But just know that the bottle that she's holding when she walks in is now in my collection of alcohol. I can tell my kids I snagged that sucker. I was like, none of you. I think I think everyone was so caught up taking pictures with her. I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no. The bottle where she walks in, she says,

I'm here, bitches. That bottle. And we do something with that bottle. That bottle is still in my house. You were not letting Andy put that in the clubhouse. That was going to the Osepho household. It is coming to the Osepho household. For all of my pain, the season that I have

experienced, that is my token. That's your reward? And she really goes in on people what i have i have never felt so it's like it's i it's almost like you're what so i went almost close to last and it's like you're watching someone push your friends off a cliff oh my god you're hearing your friends scream as they go down and in your head you're saying I'm next yeah I'm next the firing squad so the firing squad starts with Ashley and you see me and Karen holding each other and shaking because we're like, oh my God.

And so in that moment, we all realize she is going to reload and it will be your turn soon. It was so chaotic. It was so chaotic. Oh my God. You can tell that even in the, I don't know if it was the preview

for the episode or something for next week, but like Nia is completely thrown. And I'm like, if you can like, I mean, Nia- Thrown off a cliff. Thrown off a cliff, as Wendy says. This fall on Bravo. It's time to turn up.

Think you've seen it all? I don't think you've been a good friend to me lately. We're friends like that. Who needs enemies? You ain't seen nothing yet. Cheers to being Germanic. With the Real Housewives of Potomac. Oh my gosh, can I take this in? It's gonna be amazing. New York City. Everyone is a gossip. No one

gets a happier life. Salt Lake City. We don't wear costumes, we wear fashion. And below deck sailing out. You broke the rules and now you're here getting upset. Watch all new seasons on Bravo or stream it on City TV+. Let's have a real good time. I felt too seen. Dragged.

I'm N.K. and this is Basket Case. So I basically had what back in the day they would call a nervous breakdown. I was crying and I was inconsolable. It was just very big, sudden swaps of different meds. What is wrong with me? Oh, look at you giving me therapy, girl. Finally, a show for the mentally ill girlies. On Basket Case, I talk to people about what happens when what we call mental health

is shaped by the conditions of the world we live in. Because if you haven't noticed, we are experiencing some kind of conditions that are pretty hard to live with. But if you struggle to cope, the society that created the conditions in the first place will tell you there's something wrong with you. And it will call you a basket case. Listen to Basket Case every Tuesday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Do you know that we are actually besties in real life? And as all besties do, we navigate the highs and lows of life together. And what does that look like? A thousand pep talks.

A million I've got yous. Some very urgent I'm coming overs. Because, I don't know, let's face it, life can get even crazier than a season finale of Grey's Anatomy. And now here we are, opening up the friendship circle. To you. Someone's cheating? We've got you on that. In-laws are in-lying? Let's get into it. Toxic friendship circle. To you. Someone's cheating. We've got you on that. In-laws are in-lying.

Let's get into it. Toxic friendship. Air it out. We're on your side to help you with your concerns. Talk about ours. And every once in a while, bring on an awesome guest to get their take on the things that you bring us. While we may be unlicensed to advise, we're going to do it anyway. Listen to Call It What It Is on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Once again, we find ourselves in an unprecedented election. And with all that's happening in the lead up to the big day, a weekly podcast just won't cut it. Get a better grasp of where we stand as a nation every weekday on the NPR Politics Podcast. Here are seasoned reporters dig into the issues that are shaping voters' decisions and understand how the latest updates play into the bigger picture. Listen to the NPR Politics Podcast on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Now, Wendy, we have to ask you the question that we ask all of our lost culture is this guest which is what was the culture that made you say culture is for you bowen can you explain more in detail

this is the sort of formative foundational pop culture that kind of set you off that was the seed crystal that blossomed into this beautiful lattice of culture in your life oh man okay so can i pick more than one yes so two oh man i have so many okay so i'll do movie and music okay perfect for movie i i you know i'm a child of an immigrant and I have an older sister. And so why I say that is while my mom was working, it was me and my sister. We often turned to movies to tell us what life could be if my mom worked hard enough. Wow.

And Clueless. That's my favorite movie of all time. Really? Yeah, I just watched it the other day because i watch it once a month oh clueless change in my life and once i saw that i saw how the other side of the world lives for us you know we were living in a two-bedroom apartment and to see these kids and to see her go to her closet and push a button and her clothes rotated i was like this is amazing and it never left me and i was like this is this is it that movie as well as, gosh, I know the song. Top That.

Top That. I don't really give a about Top That. What song is that about the girl who, the teen? What is it? What is it? What is it? Teen Witch, Anna says. Is it Teen Witch?

That was my movie. Teen Witch. Listen, that movie and The Boy Who Could Fly, those were like my 90s. Like, oh. Okay, all right. Okay, okay, okay. No, those are fantastic answers.

Honestly, Clueless, you know what it was? I was, we were obviously, we were all young when that first came out, but I just remember the image of Alicia Silverstone in that yellow Jean-Paul Gaultier, like plaid ensemble that she had picked out in her computer and then her walking down and then Dion, Stacey Dash in that like hat, you know, them walking down and just talking to each other this way. And

then, you know, as if like the whole thing, it felt like it was just, I didn't know why, but it hit me right in my, like, I don't know what it was, but I was like, I need to know everything. It was so much, you know? It's this timeless, it created this very timeless fantasy i mean you know it's jane austen or whatever but like it's still this but the image of going to that high school and dressing up that way and like driving through the palm trees like i just like that is so indelible to everybody i think especially people of our age you know like what a huge movie no that was that was huge that was major. And thank you to the casting for making Dion. For making Dion a woman of color. Because too often, those movies

existed. Like, you know, you could have The Breakfast Club. Those movies. But I didn't have representation. But to see Dion in that movie, to see Staceyacy dash it was like oh wow this is amazing yeah and also you know the thing about uh dion and clueless is yes she is the best friend character but she also has her own arc in fact we actually know more about dion's romantic life

than we do shares and also you know she has experiences that share doesn't have you know you get that share like takes a lot of cues from her and from her relationship with murray played by donald fazan and also it's just they have this entire thing going on and it's it's not just the stock best friend which which, of course, as we know, people of color and queer people often are just the appendage. But that was not the case with this movie. And it's just it is ahead of its time. And it actually it's important for people growing up to see it because then they recognize like a diverse group of friends is not just like, you know, it exists, it's out there. And I just thought, especially at an affluent school, like that representation too, is just,

it had to mean a lot. It meant a lot. And for me in my thirties, the fact that it still sticks with me is a testament to how much it does mean and how much it did me, you know? So yeah. Yeah. So my music piece. Yes, yes. Okay, so I have two. The first would be Lil' Kim's Crush On You video. When she switched her freaking wig

five times from red to yellow to blue to green and she had those contacts in her eyes let me tell you i was in the seventh grade and i said i don't want to wear glasses anymore and my mom said okay you need contacts i got the same colored contacts as her and wore them up until college when i finally said okay enough is enough up until college because of her she literally changed how i viewed fashion how i viewed sexuality just how she just dominated in that five minute video i said this is this is it all right second britney spears i loved britney spears song um i think it's i'm a slave for you where she had the yellow python and she had the jeans below her

waist and then the crop top and then she did baby baby that moved the culture that moved the culture for me in so many ways because it's just something about these women who just are so sure and so confident about themselves and just the way in which they are showing the world that i'm owning this space it's just oh my gosh, that those are fantastic answers. Have, have any, have any of you guys seen the, the Janet Jackson documentary that just came out through the New York times?

Is that the one that explores the, the, the thing where her and Justin Timberlake? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. But basically like everyone is sort of the setup of it all is just like talking about Janet's career up until this shift when i think

um it was control was the album where like things like really started to change but before that like her first two albums were very sort of like fulfilling the joe jackson like you know thing of like okay it's wholesome it's you know it should appeal to all people and then control was when she started to like own her sexuality and that's when the culture did not know what to do with this black woman who was owning her her physicality this way and i mean talk about like little kim like sort of doing that completely in this revolutionary way herself but with janet it was just this thing of like, okay. And so of course, society is going to pile onto this woman for doing something that falls out of line with what they value. And so of course, they're going to side with this man who profits off proximity to black culture and all this stuff. Highly recommend it.

But I mean, both Lil' Kim and Britney Spears, I think fantastic answers And sort of like all, and I'm just sort of fresh off watching this documentary. I'm like, there's something about that time in the culture. I know we all talk about like, oh, early aughts, like impactful, whatever. But like Lil' Kim is so major on so many levels. And I still don't think we've processed the impact. We don't give her her flowers. Lil' Kim is why we're able. You know, Bowie, you and I were having this conversation

of us occupying this space and people looking at us and not knowing what to do with us. Little Kim is why you're able to digest Cardi B. Little Kim is why you're able to digest Nicki Minaj. That is, She kicked that door open and a lot of these women literally owe

their entire image to her because there was never a time before that women would rap but they felt they had to wear men's clothing like the Queen latifahs of the world the mc lights of the world they came before her but little kim was the first one to say i can rap about this stuff that you know may seem gangster to some people but i can do it while

being sexy that's never been done before so hats off to her sometimes I just sit and listen to How Many Licks and I just let it happen to me and I just like because she's going in so hard and it's like you don't think she can heighten it but the whole song is this build and it just gets even more and also that chorus that

How many licks does it take till you get to the center I'm just like the whole thing is driving and it's just taking you to Mars. Yes. I am obsessed. And you're right because, you know, it's funny that you say Britney Spears

and also Lil' Kim. And in a way, you know, looking at these girls in Clueless who, you know, were confident and own themselves, it seems like, and sometimes I think like the things that are most important to us

are the things that we need the most. So you as a young person, what was the relationship to, like, I don't know what it is in the culture with your mother. What was the educational relationship to sexuality like? Was it something that you found yourself learning more from outside of that? Or like, what was that relationship?

I learned, we had, my mother and I had conversations about what happens to a woman's body as she matures, what happens if you do have sex, like what, you know, what the result of that is. But as far as my own sexuality, that's something that I had to look to the media for it wasn't conversations that were that open and that's why when you guys see me in season six it's me being liberated too we started filming the second week of february and i had my surgery the end of January I believe so you guys are seeing

someone who just got this new body and she's like yes and sexuality is something that oftentimes is quailed in Nigerian society especially for females uh it doesn't happen as rampant, but they still have female, you know, genital mutilation in Nigeria where only men should enjoy the spoils of sexuality and women shouldn't. So it's like this sense of ownership. And I feel like I peaked late in life because my friends, I feel like they understood it when they were younger when they were in their 20s and i'm just getting into it i'm like oh yes i'm loving this and i'm like i'm like 10 years late here guys but whatever i relate honestly so do i because i think i think as as as gay men too like when you look at what especially when we were growing up and this is why i think it's great that

there is so much more representation. I mean, it matters in every sense because I mean, as a gay man, I'll just say it like you don't really figure out how to have sex until you're in your mid to late twenties. I honestly, in our generation anyway,

like at least that's how I can speak for myself. Like I was unsure of that because we really didn't, yes, we had sex education, but it was entirely focused on the heterosexual point of view. I mean, there was no there was absolutely no education. You know, our friend John Early has a joke. I'm going to butcher it, but it's like, I think in high school I could have benefited from less trigonometry and more how to use my butt for sex.

And it's like I identify with that because because we were just kind of like thrown to the wolves. Like, how are you exactly going to learn not just about the mechanics, but about the specifics and the nuances of sexuality if you don't have anyone telling you because either they don't know or it feels taboo? You know what I mean, I love that. And I think that that's so important for you to say to me as a heterosexual woman, because so many times I'm in these spaces and we have conversations about diversity. And I just think that and I often say this in my meetings, I feel like we put so much emphasis on racial diversity or gender diversity but we need to understand what it means for people who come from different backgrounds all over and how we educating them because like i never thought of that i never thought of sexual education and how that looks at it through one lens like i would have never thought about that and what does that mean for for people who who are trying to reconcile like i was like what does sex look like and for

you guys you didn't even have anything and that breaks my heart oh no no no but we figured it out i promise you i hate you they were talking it's funny because they were talking about it on the real like it was a topic on the real it was like one of the hot topics they were saying, like they were discussing whether or not anal sex should be taught during sex education. And a couple of the hosts were like, this is too much. Like, I don't want my child. Like, this feels like a little extra. And I feel like there wasn't a voice saying, well, remember that is that is actually how some people have sex and they don't have another option so that's just a different perspective i think to look at it like of course like if i'm a heterosexual person with heterosexual children and i think you know butt sex i'm like okay wait maybe i'm hesitant

but i do think it's important to voice and that's why i think it is it's it's actually crucial to have more representation in terms of like the voices teaching, you know, just acknowledging the spectrum of sexuality amongst everyone and like radically changing the way that we speak to each other and respecting each other's sexual identities, gender identities, et cetera, because it's not monolithic. And I think that we need to be more respectful, definitely, but absolutely at the baseline, just more aware and more, like you said before, compassionate about what people need. Dr. Matt, correctly.

Well, I just think until like we get there in terms of the educational aspect of it like I think what Wendy's saying is very apt where it's like you are only a lot of people are getting their sexual sort of context from the media and that's okay

and there's I mean now it's got I mean the documentary talks about how even now like you know we've gotten much better about empowering women to have to to be sexually sort of liberated in media but like that's sort of the only way a lot of people like figure it out because there's nothing a textbook can teach you about you know owning having some ownership or you know autonomy in that absolutely no matter what your gender is no matter what kind of sex you have like i feel like you might as well watch someone

i don't know like let's just say little kim like have her tit out at an award show and be like whoa that's that's pretty crazy and cool right like let me try to explore that part of myself i don't know it is important though that while i think it think it's not necessarily destructive or any other way, one way or the other, that people get their, you know, representation of sexuality in the media. I think that's really why it's important that that representation be responsible and also be holistic. You know what I mean? Because I do think that it's different for women and men you know what i mean for a woman to say i'm going to step out like and this is going to be the way i represent myself like i i think that we just have to acknowledge

the fact that like the society treats and we see it in the media the way that these women are treated and the way that you know they get disregarded for example with janet like this is why i think actually it does matter that the textbooks change it does matter that that it gets um addressed in schools i think it's actually the responsibility of people educating our young humans to have a more compassionate approach because you're talking about the media. Like, yes, I do think it can be empowering as we're all talking about. But also the media is of entertainment industry is a business. And these people, these like corporations and these people that put things together

are not necessarily thinking, let me responsibly educate the young people that are going to watch this about sexuality. So I think it does have to be a holistic approach however i think are these empowering figures 100 and i think as we move forward and as we see media change it is getting more holistic and responsible i mean you don't turn on hbo now and every single show has rape i mean at least as a conversation about like the fact that that needs to change i and um so i think we're getting better but i do think it's important that education wise we get more holistic more respectful and more informative in real ways absolutely and just to you know tree branch off of that that's why at the reunion when Andy was saying, what surgery did I have? I informed him, but I also gave like a disclaimer.

Women are dying from this. Yeah. It was really important for me to find a board certified surgeon because I know the power of this platform and I understand it and it's not lost on me. So I would never want someone to say, I want to do what Wendy did, but you know, maybe I want to cut costs. Well, I want to be very clear. People are dying. So if you're going to do it, go to a board certified surgeon, because, you know, I think that to what you're saying, Matt, media does have a sense of responsibility for it to be responsible what they are showing and I definitely felt that in that moment

and it's great that they showed you saying that too because as we said they can cut around anything because then I think you probably would have been mortified to watch it had they not included that because there's a reason why you said it yeah I'm glad at least they included one thing I like when you roll your eyes like at least i got one thing right yeah one thing

it must be so frustrating oh but one one more thing we should commend you for before we move on to i don't think so honey is i'm very glad they did also show you asking ashley do you think colorism exists in society she says yes do you think it exists within this friend group she says no like that is the perfect way to sort of isolate her world view on not her world view her view on this show privilege that it you really kind of honed in on that in a way that i think was fair to her you were you gave her an opportunity to clarify what she thought and she still's still kind of talked her way out of this truth and like matt says this i mean a lot of people say this but each housewives franchise is about a different thing in society you know in new york it's about alcoholism and it's all about religion

well they have there's a clear issue with with each thing and i think okay tell me what each one is real quick i didn't know that okay man well i think that the that's something that's very dark in the new york housewives is they all seem to have a a real dependency and they're grappling with um alcohol abuse i mean i think that it's from the very beginning you've seen these women change and they've all been through divorces and been through hardship and different traumas and i think that it's something that threads them all is it gets really dark with alcohol. And I think that that's probably the larger conversation that needs to happen with Beverly Hills. I think, you know, there is so much about the cracks in the China.

It's about appearing a certain way, but really having really one thing go on. I mean, if you go back to the first season, second season, like it's all about how one of the women is being abused physically to the point where she met she may die yeah and one it gets spoken out loud and then the show takes a turn and it's really about like you know these women speaking their truth in a real way and not caring what people think when i watch potomac i think that there is there is an issue with colorism and i think that they're there and i every time it comes up on the show i think you know it's almost a shame that there can't be a more of a discussion about it because i do think like me as a viewer and you know i'm also very aware of the fact that i'm not the person to lead this discussion but I do think it should be had is you know

I think that the darker skinned women are treated differently than the lighter skinned women and for you to pose that question to Ashley and for her to shirk the responsibility I think kind of says it all because what we're not acknowledging is even if she feels she doesn't

behave a certain way she's not taking in the totality of what the experience of being on the show is which is you guys deal with the viewers and how they treat you as well and so you know only you know that experience but i do think that there is obviously a difference that's just what i'll say that's what i never and first of all thank you that was so well put um but i a i didn't know that other people noticed it like i know that there's a subsection of people who notice that i didn't know that all the viewers and if i'm being very candid viewers that are not black notice yes yes yes and so that's very interesting to me that you have said that because we just thought that it's something within black culture that we know of

because we have dealt with it our whole lives versus everyone who sees it and they're like no there's colorism at play here. So, wow. Wow. It did take it coming up on the show. And like there are, I do, I, one of my favorite recappers is Brooke Ashley and she, she's on YouTube and she talks about the show and she makes it a point. And she's so frustrated with it that, you know, it stops her from enjoying the show often, which is a shame. But the fact is, when I see them get on Candace and they don't get on Ashley the same way and they don't get on the way that Giselle and Robin

can sometimes be the same way, you can't help but notice that. That's all I'll say. You know what I mean? Wow. Wow. Fascinating. We'll what I mean? Wow. Wow. Fascinating. We'll just,

we'll just leave it at that. We'll leave it at that. And everyone can think about it. The real housewives of Salt Lake city are back. I love that. Oh my gosh. Welcome. And last season's drama was just the tip of the iceberg.

You're recording us? I am disgusted. Never in a million years after everything we've been through did I think that you would reach out to our sworn enemy. We were friends. How could you do this to me? I don't trust her. The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City,

Wednesdays at 9 on Bravo or stream it on City TV Plus. Hey friends, I'm Jessica Capshaw. And this is Camilla Luddington. And we have a new podcast, Call It What It Is. You may know us from Graceland Memorial, but did you know that we are actually besties in real life? And as all besties do, we navigate the highs and lows of life together. And what does that look like? A thousand pep talks. A million I've got you's. Some very urgent I'm coming over's. Because, I don't know, let's face it, life can get even crazier than a season finale of Grey's Anatomy. And now here we are, opening up the friendship circle.

To you. Someone's cheating? We've got you on that. In-laws are in-lying? Let's get into it. Toxic friendship? Air it out. We're on your side to help you with your concerns. Talk about ours. And every once in a while, bring on an awesome guest to get their take on the things that you bring us. While we may be unlicensed to advise, we're going to do it anyway. Listen to Call It What It Is on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

I felt too seen. Dragged. I'm NK, and this is Basket Case. So I basically had what back in the day they would call a nervous breakdown. I was crying and I was inconsolable. It was just very big sudden swaps of different meds. What is wrong with me? Oh, look at you giving me therapy, girl. Finally, a show for the mentally ill girlies. On Basket Case, I talk to people about what happens when what we call mental health is shaped by the conditions of the world we live in.

Because if you haven't noticed, we are experiencing some kind of conditions that are pretty hard to live with. But if you struggle to cope, the society that created the conditions in the first place will tell you there's something wrong with you and it will call you a basket case. Listen to basket case every Tuesday on the I heart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Once again, we find ourselves in an unprecedented election.

And with all that's happening in the lead up to the big day, a weekly podcast just won't cut it. Get a better grasp of where we stand as a nation every weekday on the NPR Politics Podcast. So now moving into our iconic segment, I don't think So, Honey, which is the cornerstone, the touchstone of Las Culturistas, where we take one minute to rant against something in culture, pop culture, whatever is grinding your gears because it needs to be addressed correctly, as it were. I do have a topic, Bowen. Okay, this is Matt Rogers' I Don't Think So, Honey. His time starts now. I do have I do have a topic Bowen Okay This is Matt Rogers'

I Don't Think So Honey His time starts now I Don't Think So Honey Method acting Girl This is This is a mess So I'm reading reviews

For The Power of the Dog Which is the new Jane Campion movie With Ben and Decomber Batch And Kirsten Dunst And he says He did not bathe

While he was on set Oh come on I said If you have to do that To get into character I don't think so honey and he says he did not bathe while he was on set. Oh, come on. I said, if you have to do that to get into character, I don't think so, honey. That is not method acting. That does not make you a better actor. That makes you disgusting to be around.

That makes you a health hazard. That makes you a safety concern. That makes me, if I'm Kirsten Dunst, very unhappy. I don't want to be around you if you smell like ass. I don't think so, honey. Method acting. Lady Gaga, we need you to be in one piece piece we can't have you driving yourself crazy for nine months pretending you're an italian woman for house of gucci which by the way i'm seeing tonight very excited i don't think so honey 15 seconds do not drive yourself crazy lady gaga you are already crazy enough

you are just crazy enough that we love you we don't need you going off the deep end as you said in shallow five seconds i don't think so honey method acting deep end. As you said in shallow. Five seconds. I don't think so, honey. Method acting, girl. I want to talk to you on set. I don't want to talk to Mr. Magoo. I don't think so, honey. And that's one minute. Very fair point.

Beautifully put. I'm just saying, like, if I was an actor on set and someone was in character the whole time, I'm looking at them side-eyed because it's like, you're not this person. Also, that's what acting is. Like, I get that everyone does what they need to do to give a good performance. But when it comes to you not bathing for weeks, I'm like, you're not thinking about other people. This is narcissism, egomaniacal. You're only thinking about yourself.

To sort of like destroy the boundary between like what you're doing on a set and what you're doing thinking about yourself to to sort of like destroy the boundary between like what you're doing on a set and what you're doing at home that i feel like that is slightly dangerous because like how i'm just thinking about like daniel day lewis being like abraham lincoln while he's like chilling on the couch like you're not when he's not working it's like how how is able how is a blinkin that is is the most egregious example to me. I'm like, how does that work? For you as a human being to process through your

gray matter, how are you doing that? There's something damaging about that, potentially. Here's the funny thing, Daniel Day-Lewis. If you go home and you're Abraham Lincoln, how does Abraham Lincoln negotiate a microwave? How does Abraham Lincoln work the Apple TV? go at home and you're abraham lincoln how does abraham lincoln negotiate a microwave how does abraham lincoln work to apple tv that's what i'm saying don't pretend like you're abraham lincoln unless he actually went to go live in a cottage which i'm not playing it against the girl probably

she did go live in a cottage with a lantern or whatever but also abraham lincoln lived in the white house you can't possibly do that a mess everything about it is just all over the place i don't understand it and lady gaga literally in all her interviews and she's doing she's on quite the press tour for house of gucci right now yeah it's like i lived as her for nine months and i almost broke and when i went home i never broke character and i'm just like to be a fly on the wall while she walks around her apartment like as this woman like what does that even mean? In your quiet moments are you losing your mind?

I would go crazy and I'm just like, I can't get past the bathing thing because then you're just not thinking about your colleagues and you become someone who I would go to HR about, to be honest. But the entertainment industry gets away with murder because we cater

to these egos and i'm like i heard the performance is great and i can't wait to see the movie so we'll love it we love it um bowen i iconically don't know where my phone is okay so uh it is your time to do i don't think so honey and i will i will time you from here but yes there you go this is bowen yang's i don't think so honey his time starts now i don Don't Think So Honey, Les Moonves. If you do watch this Janet Jackson documentary, they make the case very convincingly that the whole fallout, the whole

reason why her career was sort of cratered was because of him, because he was so egomaniacal to demand an apology from her for what happened, for all these FCC fines, whatever. The FCC chairman, 10 years in 2014, said the reaction was overblown.

And for Les Moonves to be the person who took a hammer to Janet Jackson's career and destroyed it, just shattered it, is unforgivable to me. Just as unforgivable, I'm not going to make this compared to quantify this, but as unforgivable as all the sexual assaults that he's sort of toxically poisoned

the culture at CBS with. What a small, small man. Julie Chen Moodvez standing by her husband. You're so, so, so awful. Just a true, true, like simping for the white man. You're ashamed you're you're truly i'm ashamed for you as an asian person do you know what i'm saying and that is 70 seconds one minute and 10 seconds but you know what i got a little tongue tied whenever julie

chen moonves we have the opportunity to roast her you know i'm on you know we're roasting her and i say this as a viacom CBS employee oh same Les Moonves I mean truly despicable human being one of the most despicable human beings in the world and luckily he's banished from society and I guess Justin Timberlake finally did offer that like limp dick apology well no it's so funny and then and then I just want to say they they like they like put Justin's apology on uh you know, a text thing on the documentary. And it's so ironic that he says, I want to apologize. Well, this is what he said.

I apologize to both Britney Spears and Janet Jackson individually. I mean, that sentence doesn't make any sense. That doesn't make any sense because what you've done is you've lumped them together. You've lumped them together. What are the specific apologies? What are they? Exactly. Anyway, that's just my thought. know wendy agrees wendy agrees she doesn't have to

okay well this this is going to be a moment for life as nikki minaj once said because wendy osefo is going to do and i don't think so honey do you have something in mind i can go off the top of my head i I guess something I want. I mean, because baby you get paid for your words. I get paid for my words. Alright, I'm ready. No rehearsal needed. This is Wendy Osefos. This is Dr. Wendy

Osefos. We're going live. Dr. Wendy Osefos, I don't think so, honey. Her time starts now. I'm really getting tired of all of these celebrities who continue to go to space. Michael Strahan, why is your ass going to space? I am needing for people to stop this. So my issue is this. Space is one of these things that should be discovered and looked at by other people.

Why is it only people who are in the top tier of society, they get to take their little raggedy ass on this rocket and go up? I want to go to space. Other people want to go to space. People in Oregon want to go to space. Why don't we sign. I want to go to space. Other people want to go to space. People in Oregon want to go to space. Why don't we sign up for people to go to space? We want everybody to get their COVID vaccine and stuff like that.

Hello, yes, we want people to get the COVID vaccine, but in the same token, the same way you guys are forcing people to get their vaccine, you should be having those same people sign up to go to space. If I get a vaccine, do I get a free trip to space? Maybe that will work. If I get a vaccine, do I get a free trip to space? Maybe that would work. If I get a booster, do I go to space? I don't think so, honey.

So until you guys allow us to go to space, I think that we should get something. Maybe a free turkey, maybe something for Christmas. But what I do not like is these raggedy-ass celebrities continue to go to space. No, honey. I'm done. Oh, my God.

That was one of the best of all time. One of the all-time greats. You are so right. continue to go to space. No, honey. I'm done. Oh my god. That was one of the best of all time. One of the all time greats. You are so right. They get to go to space. Why? Point of contention for me. You want to go to space? No, I don't. But I just want to know that other people beside these rich people can go to space.

Yes. It's not fair. I completely understand. Do they get a pot of gold and come back down and we don't know about it like what is up there why do you let's wait michael strahan wants to go i missed this he's going as of today he's going to space come on here's the thing what did mich Michael Strahan do in the beginning of his career that qualified him to do all these other things? Like he's like a daytime host. He's going to space. He's doing all these things.

He has lived. Okay. And I want a million lives. Yes. Okay. Well, if anyone, if eventually there will,

there might come a day where Dr. Wendy would want to actually go to space. Yes. And if, and we just hope and pray that you have that access when that day comes because you deserve first housewife on Lost Couch first housewife in space the degrees

more to my utility bill I love it oh my god I have to tell you this was so enjoyable i'm such a delight we had you on it was so great to get to know you a little bit better because we are like we said such fans on the show and everything that even though sometimes they edit it in a certain way i just want to let you know like it's coming across you really do carry the light and we're big big big

fans of yours well thank you so much i am forever grateful to everyone who watches the show and forever grateful to you guys who just give me positivity because it is not something that is for the faint of heart so you know you slide in in my dms made my. So thank you for being a light to us. I appreciate you both. Wendy. You guys are so great. This is true. Made my week. Thank you so much for coming in and talking to us.

Thank you Bowen. Thank you Matt. We do end every episode with a song. And it's going to, it's going to, what do you think Bow? Is it drive back? Don't you know you made me cry.

Come back. Come back. You know that you can do it. Like that. Like that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Don't you know you make me come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back, come back man.com. Bye. Bye. I'm NK. And this is basket case. What is wrong with me? A show about the ways that mental illness is shaped by not just biology swaps of different meds, but by culture and society.

By looking closely at the conditions that cause mental distress, I find out why so many of us are struggling to feel sane, what we can do about it, and why we should care. Oh, look at you giving me therapy, girl. Listen to Basket Case every Tuesday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, friends. I'm Jessica Capshaw.

And this is Camilla Luddington. And we have a new podcast, Call It What It Is. You may know us from Graceland Memorial, but did you know that we are actually besties in real life? And as all besties do, we navigate the highs and lows of life together. Big or small, we're there. And now here we are opening up the friendship circle to you. Listen to Call It What It Is on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Joe Gatto.

I'm Steve Byrne. Together we do the Two Cool Moms podcast, which is a podcast where we help dispense advice to our loyal listeners. Everybody has an issue. Everybody has something that they need help with. Right. And that's where we come in. Because our moms, we're cool moms. We like to think that we have help with. Right. And that's where we come in. Because our moms were cool moms.

We like to think that we have inherited their maternal advice. And we try to just do some good. Besides being comedians, we love to help. Guys, bring us your queries. They could be personal questions. They could be serious. They could be lighthearted. Yeah.

But know this. We are here for you. Yeah. You can find us wherever you listen to your podcasts or on the iHeartRadio app. Hey, I'm Bruce Bozzi. On my podcast, Table for Two, we have unforgettable lunch after unforgettable lunch with the best guests you could possibly ask for. People like Matt Bomer, Emma Roberts, and Colin Jost. Did you say a Caesar salad with lobster?

Yeah. Whoa. Our second season is airing right now, so you can catch up on our conversations that are intimate and often hilarious. Listen to Table for Two with Bruce Bozzi on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.