Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang - "Helicopter In, Ha HA!" (w/ Joel Kim Booster & Mitra Jouhari)

Episode Date: December 9, 2020

Acclaimed podcasters gather to discuss the current cultural shape of our society in this ode to the human spirit that is this episode of Las Culturistas with Joel Kim Booster & Mitra Jouhari. They host the Urgent Care podcast, and boy are Matt and Bowen glad they called the hospital to book them. Christmas culture is discussed. Having a song written about you called "Medusa" in high school is discussed. The Housewives of Potomac and Salt Lake are discussed. Th words "Plastic "her"-gery" are spoken out loud. Join us for an example of how it's fucking done. XO see you tomorrow.....dun dun DUNNNNNNN......ha Ha! Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Real Housewives of New York City are back for another bite of the Big Apple. Look who it is. Joined by elite new friends. Rebecca Minkoff. Have you ever heard of her? But things could change in a New York Minute. She had this wild night and ended up getting pregnant by some other guy. What?

You told her? Not today, Satan. Not today. The Real Housewives of New York City. All new Tuesdays at 9 on Bravo. Or stream it on City TV+. I'm Julian Edelman. I'm Rob Gronkowski.

And we are super excited to tell you about our new show, Dudes on Dudes. We're spilling all the behind-the-scenes stories, crazy details, and honestly, just having a blast talking football. Every week, we're discussing our favorite players of all times, from legends to our buddies to current stars. We're finally answering the age-old question, what kind of dudes

are these dudes? We're gonna find out, Jules. New episodes drop every Thursday during the NFL season. Listen to Dudes on Dudes on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm NK, and this is Basket Case. What is wrong with me?

A show about the ways that mental illness is shaped by not just biology. Swaps of different meds. But by culture and society. By looking closely at the conditions that cause mental distress, I find out why so many of us are struggling to feel sane, what we can do about it, and why we should care.

Listen to Basket Case every Tuesday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Steve Byrne. We are Two Cool Moms. We certainly are. And guess where we could find us now? Oh, I don't know. The iHeart Podcast Network? That's right. We're an official iHeart podcast, and I'm super excited about it. I am too. I thought Two Cool Moms was such a fun podcast, but now it's even more funner and cooler and heartier. That's right.

It's more iHeartier. I knew it. Check your heart rate. We're here at iHeart. Yeah, you can find us wherever you listen to your podcasts or on the iHeartRadio app. Look, man! Where? Oh, I see. Wow. Oh, my.

Oh, and look over there. Wow, is that culture? Yes. Oh, my goodness. Wow. Las Culturistas! Ding dong! Las Culturistas calling! Hey, Frosty girl. Hey, queen. You are in the Christmas spirit, I can tell.

I so am, and that's why I call you my Frosty girl. That's a new thing that the readers can start saying to each other, just be like, hey, Frosty. If you want to let someone know that you think they are bedazzled, if you think they look absolutely rich, you go, hey, Frost frosty who comes from riches what impact do you hope the lost culture restas listeners will have i want to empower the listeners the readers to create their own culture and just let it out into the world i don't want

them i don't want us to sort of unilaterally you're saying you don't want me to be too instructive with them okay fine i take it all back call your friends whatever the fuck you want i don't care to be honest can i be honest with my sister go i was barely even like forming a thought and i just finished the sentence what is with you what is your mental capacity i'm a tired and frosty girl yeah i know you listen frosty girl you better wake the fuck. I don't want to be a tired culture ever at all, especially with our guests.

You sound like you're in some sort of tired psychosis. We said to stop everything. Girl, are you okay? Mama, you did have a thick week. Look, my frosty girl, I am... I am just so energized, activated, seeing the guests on the Zoom.

I just have to ramp up to the energy. Do you know what I'm saying? Totally. Okay, so let's try to get you there. You know what I'm doing? Don't shame me. You're tire shaming me. No shame.

You did such incredible work this weekend. It was so exhausting. I don't want me you're tired shaming me no shame you you did such incredible work this weekend it was so exhausting no me neither i trust me i don't trust me i don't the last thing i want to do oh my god get into all that no no but here's the thing like yeah i made sure that i was woken up for the episode by watching christmas in the square what do you think do you want to bring in the guests or do you want to share your initial thoughts? I want to say my initial thought first to make sure that they don't step over me because there is a real huge problem

with stepping over me and what I say. Yeah, you're right. I thought it was fine. All right, now we should bring the guests in. Let's bring the guests in. And at that point, we will be four acclaimed podcasters in one space. Yes.

This isn't sort of words I'm attaching to us. This is the press. This is what the press has said. What outlets? The Weekly Gazette, The Post. Yes. And The Times Chronicle have all said this. They've all called us acclaimed.

They've called us acclaimed. Yes. They haven't acclaimed us. They've called us acclaimed. To call us acclaimed is to acclaim or acclaim. I love that. I love that. And this is us acclaiming or acclaim altogether.

I think this is one of our guests' 92nd appearance on the podcast. Yes. And the other guest's 18th. Yes. And I'm so happy that sort of the audience can get to know them and discover them. Yes. You know what I mean? Because that's really what this is all about.

It's like supporting young, hot talent that host a podcast. I want to pull back the curtain a little bit. Well, first, one thing happened before our guests came on on the Zoom. Hot engineer Doug said, is Joel Kim Booster really coming on this Zoom? And then Anna and I, a hot executive producer, Anna and I were like, yes. And he goes, okay.

And we're like, are you a fan? And he goes, oh, you guys just talk about him so much. I can't believe he's going to show up. That's insane. So to be clear, he wasn't a fan from his work. He wasn't a fan. He was a fan from hearing about us. Okay, cool.

To be clear. As if he was like this imaginary friend or this like, you just, hmm, I don't know about that. Oh, that person is real? Even though he's a little bit older than us. I would call him the little brother of the podcast. He's a little brother. He's a little brother.

And the little sister. And then our other guest came on the Zoom. And then she and hot executive producer Anna had a moment where they could have possibly been cousins. We won't get into it. We won't get into it. Just bring them the fuck in. They are the hosts of Urgent Care. Okay?

It's a podcast you can listen to. It's a podcast you call in with your issues. They will answer with such grace cogency i really can't believe this advice that they're giving some people beautiful and then good fucking luck with if you actually take their advice because that's not really the point the point is more to entertain i know i know you know what i mean that's a peek behind the curtain they're also wonderful comedians writers actors in their own right In their own right. When they come together, they are urgent care. They're acclaimed podcasters.

What do you say we bring them in? I say yes. Everyone, please. Welcome into your ears. The acclaimed Joel Kim Booster and Mitra Johari. And we figured out who to say first alphabetically. Hello, guys.

Welcome. 10 out of 10 opener to the book yeah true 10 would you say that is the most low energy moment everyone stop bullying me okay you have some shit to answer for. Wake up, Pearl. You guys are honestly, like, my favorite humans out there. These humans right here, seriously. Like, I love these humans. These humans. These humans. Some of the most amazing humans got together for this Zoom.

Let the queens come out. Let the queens ball out. It is in my literal funeral doc on Google Docs that Mitra will sing fight song at my funeral in a gorgeous ball gown. Fight song.

What's this doc? To the best of Mitra's ability. To the best of her ability. It's just a doc I have on my computer that lists all the things I want to happen at my funeral. Are Matt and I in it? Yeah, you're pallbearers. As sluck. We're pallbearers as sluck.

Because this came up with me and Joel because we were talking about like bridal parties and Joel was like, I have my pallbearer list. I've stopped like ranking my friends based on who would stand up at my wedding and I've started ranking my friends based on who would stand up at my wedding and I've started ranking my friends based on who would be pallbearers at my funeral. Where are we sort of on your corpse? You're at the front of the

casket, babe. Perfect. You're at the front of the casket. Thank you. But I get stage time. But she gets stage time. Well, you know, that's what's in the program, but you don't know what's actually going to happen in terms of the room because live theater you know, sometimes it just is spontaneous. People might ask Matt to sing, is what he's saying.

They might ask me to get up there. That's fine, but the deceased has demanded that I sing. In a gorgeous ball gown. In a gorgeous ball gown. And it will fit. Now, will Fight Song be a parody, or will it be the straight reading of the lyrics? No, no, no. I will be singing

Rachel Platten's Fight Song to the best of my ability. Could you add a key change at the end to make it sort of like a bigger moment? No, I can't. I can confidently say I can't. Wait, were you there? Matt, weren't you there the day that I tried to sing Fight Song

at the Forever Dog Studios? It was an event. Weren't weren't you there weren't you there the day i tried to sing fight song i made him sing like brave that day or something like that oh yes now i remember because i was really like this this is like maybe the biggest moment of hubris in my entire life so i was like yeah all all right, as a joke, I'm having fight song. I need someone to sing it. You know, I'll just sing fight song. I could not sing it. I sound so bad. You think it's going to be

the sing-along sort of everyone in America can sing it because Hillary Clinton took it, but it's a hard song. And your other one was I Want to See You Go Off,

which is based on I Want to See You Be Brave, another tough song. Yeah. To pull off vocally. Yeah. but you but you've done it you've done it successfully there's me try i you know that you know the clip i'm talking about right like i captured you in my old apartment trying to open a bottle of wine and singing slay what you want to slay and let the queen ball out it was the queen let the queens go off let the queens go off maybe honestly i want to And singing Slay What You Wanna Slay and Let the Queen Ball Out.

Let the queens go off. Let the queens go off, maybe. Honestly, I wanna see you go off. Maybe go off was repeated. Slay What You Wanna Slay and Let the Queens Drag Her on a sleigh. Let the queens drag her. I wanna see you go off. On a sleigh. I wanna see you go off.

Wow, on a sleigh. That gives it a whole new dimension. It makes it a little christmassy honestly no the whole thing is a christ it's it is it's sort of like family stone which is like it's a story that takes place during christmas but it's not about christmas okay yeah so rule of culture it's sort of like family stone in that it's not about christ it's about christmas it's not about christmas but it is okay we're not saying it together so it's not about it's about Christmas but it's not about Christmas but it is we're not saying it together so it's not

actually a rule no I just like to say it because I do a lot of rule of cultures on Mitra and I's podcast and Mitra's asked me Mitra's asked me to stop many times every time he does it I get pulled why do you think Joel does it? to make fun?

no no because he listens to it and loves it yeah it's out of love but I still go and they're usually pretty good rules of culture too

most of the time it is usually a moment where you go kind of yeah no I trust Joel to look out for those things I really do.

I'm going to determine the rule of culture. No woman has ever. No woman has ever. Set a rule of culture. Set a rule of culture. She wouldn't dare. Who do you think would? Who do you think's at home naming rules of culture?

Probably Madonna. She probably thinks she knows it all. That bitch. Stupid. That fucking bitch. Today on the chat, Matt said, Christine Baranski should be as big as Madonna. I'm mad at Madonna.

I'm mad at Madonna today for some reason. I was watching Christmas on the Square. I said, Christine Baranski should be as big as Madonna. Mitra, have you seen Christmas on the Square yet? Not yet. You have to see it. You have to. I promise I'll see yet. You have to see it. You have to. I promise I'll see it.

You have to see it at least the first 40 minutes to like really get it. And then I couldn't do it anymore after that long. Is that the Dolly Parkin one? Wait, did you stop? Yeah, Dolly Parkin.

I stopped. So Barbara from Three Busy Debras is in that. Wait. Oh my gosh. To my knowledge, she has one line, but she actually i think has more than that but i was no she i know exactly who she is and she's she they there's a scene where they're singing about

christine baranski and she keeps as a comedy beat suggesting that they rough christine baranski up yeah everyone goes yeah yeah carol swarbrick she is icon i honestly when when i was because that's very early in the movie and i honestly thought her character would be a bigger part of it because they sort of feature her and that number so much like it's such a return to that woman i'm like oh she'll she'll be a character she's a star i think it's this is a movie i will probably watch every christmas me too me too joel it's that you guys matt, Mitra has to watch it. Matt, you have to finish it because honestly, it's pure. It makes no sense.

And then somehow in the last 10 minutes, it all comes together and it's actually really sweet. There are some laugh out loud moments too near the end involving like pediatric brain surgeons and car accidents and you missed a lot.

Well, what's crazy is I did that thing where it's like you can't really take a movie but you do want to know how it wraps up. So I skipped all the way to the end. And when you go through on your little Apple TV, you can see the little pictures. Yeah, but I went to the end and I was, I don't know, I don't want to give spoilers but shocked by the turns it took.

I was just like, oh, that one's a spirit. Didn't realize that she was a spirit. It was like this one girl character. Anyway, it just, it went for it. I appreciate that the movie went for it. And Mitra will love it. Yeah, Dolly Parton is experiencing homelessness in it.

Yeah. Yes. Well, that's what you think at first. They go there. Yeah, they go there. It's really a comment. Well, in a way, it sort of is. I don't know.

Because if Dolly Parton can experience homelessness, we all can. Have you guys seen my favorite Dolly Parton movie is Joyful Noise? Have you guys seen that movie? With Queen Latifah? With Queen Latifah and Miss Kiki Palmer. Oh, wow. It is... Busiest person in the world.

Truly the busiest person in the world. It's true. Even when she like tweets something, I'm like, how did she find the time? She's very booked. Deeply. What is our favorite? And this, I don't care if you like or hate Christmas. What's our favorite Christmas culture?

Wow. Christmas culture. You've really opened it up. I know mine, but mine is mine. I'm just going to do mine first because it's dumb and everyone will see it coming,

but I won't lie about it. It's Mariah Carey. She just is my favorite Christmas culture. The song, the use of the word festive, the special I just watched, it was...

I just watched the special too and I had a very Christmassy day and she's great. She is Christmas. She's giving you cartoon Christmas diva and it is i had a very christmasy day and it's yeah she's great she is christmas she's giving you cartoon christmas diva and it's yes it's exactly what you want from her so that's mine but everyone knows that i like mariah already so fucking boring bitch fucking boring bitch anyway how's this how's this the song christmas rapping by the waitresses i'm pretty sophisticated, aren't I?

Can't say I know it. I have to ask you to perform it. It's the go. It is my favorite holiday. It's been a busy day. I don't think I have the energy. I don't know why I'm doing a British and like language, but it's you know what my favorite

deep culture Christmas song is is Fairyt tale of new york it's the only christmas song that features the word faggot can you do it yeah you cheap lousy faggot yes christmas yes christmas it kind of gives me that christmas feeling what if what if that's actually my favorite song of all time alright wait stop everything it's time for my favorite segment it's a surprise segment that us boys play it's can Mitra say

faggot now we discuss can Mitra say faggot Joel she has and she will again no she uses actually I can allege that Mitra has said faggot no you guys stop

we have to be careful people get really mad at you guys for saying that word they get mad but nobody gets mad at me but the important thing is it wasn't said by us it was said by Mitra

no well guess what I guess we can end this segment no she can't that's alright she shan't I can't

I shan't that's fine alright Christmas culture who's Mitra needs to go what's your favorite Mitra needs to go

but she hates it I'm not really Christmas culture um yeah I don't know I don't care very much I mean I love I really like I put a lot of time and effort into thoughtful presents boring uh but um you are a thoughtful gift giver I am a good gift giver um I like um oh you know what i watched that uh movie 20 feet from stardom this year and i like the story of that christmas song by darlene love um do you know yeah um it's not coming down that one christmas yeah and then like later in life she like they read it like that she got to she did it on like Letterman or something or yeah yeah

yeah well Mariah ended up covering that and I think that she like shown she like paid homage in a big way

I liked that I take back I take back The Waitresses that is actually and I think I'm sorry I mean it's like

ended up on all these lists that is the best I know all I want it's like they're singing Deck the Halls that one right but like on every like list of like the best. I know. All I want. It's like, they're singing Deck the Halls. That one.

Right. But like, on every like list of like the best contemporary Christmas songs, All I Want for Christmas is You is always number one. But number two is always

Darling Love, Baby Please Come Home. And that is a perfect Christmas song. I love that song. I like feels, it like always makes me like sort of tear up.

And then I, the story was so nice. I guess that's my favorite christmas culture but really i'm kind of grinchy right i guess grinch is my favorite christmas culture i would say mine too i love and honestly good for christine baransk for sort of crossing over with now a yet another iconic christmas character because she's not she's iconic in this film christmas on the square and she's iconic in this film christmas on the square and she's iconically martha may yes and then we were talking about grinch at work the other day

and um someone this isn't funny but but we so we had to like convince someone that taylor momson wasn't dead she was like completely convinced that taylor momson was dead and we're like are you sure because we have a really good track record with saying people are dead that aren't. So if you want to throw her name in there. I gaslit myself and then was like is she? And then I looked it up. She's alive. But I was really like did this happen?

That's what the internet has taken away from us really is the ability to really just sit in the ambiguity of whether or not Taylor Robinson is dead or not. You can find out now in a pinch if someone's alive. And that's sad.

Christine Baranski, yeah, it is sad. Christine Baranski never, this is what Aaron Jackson said in the GC today, never sells out the Dolly Parton movie. Never is like, oh God, I'm doing this fucking thing she like commits to it in a way that I really admire and I'm like I I can't like roll

my eyes at anything I ever do ever again yeah no yeah no she is like she really is and also she makes Mamma Mia she makes everything she's ever done I was about to say I just watched Mamma Mia 2 for the first time last night and I it's like that movie I I just kept tearing done. I was about to say, I just watched Mamma Mia 2 for the first time last night. And I, it's like that movie, I just kept tearing up because I was like, it's just so happy and fun. And it just feels so good.

And I really rolled my eyes at it before me. Because I was like, another one that's so fucking stupid. And then my sister, I was like, my sister finally made me watch it. And the whole time I was like,

it's so good. I was like, I just, everyone was having so much much fun when they were like all coming in on the ship singing dancing queens i was crying i'm a triumph crier i don't cry when things that are sad happen i cry when like they rescue him in the martian oh when something is like too happy for words i am weeping it doesn't matter if it's the biggest piece of shit in the worldian oh when something is like too happy for words i am weeping it doesn't matter if it's the biggest piece of shit in the world i got to watch the prom so i've now seen the prom on ryan murphy's the prom with meryl streep and james corden and um nicole kibben there are

moments chikigo michael key is in it too he's really good but there's moments in it rapper meryl streep oh yeah she's very much rapping in the post-credits but the movie is it's pretty much garbage but the performances that are good are so good like meryl just she did it again meryl is always so good and she's so good at musical theater she just like she sounds original broadway cast she does this is my thing with meryl at this point oh you're such a bitch no no no no no let me say this this is this is this is like this is intentionally stupid i want her to i want her to intentionally fail at something i want her to be like i want to do the opposite of christ Baranski and like be, and like not really give a shit in something that she's in.

Well, okay. Mama Mia too. When she came in at the end, I was really expecting her to be like, it's me. Can you believe I'm here? And then 30 seconds later,

I'm crying. You're crying. You're 100% crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying.

You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying.

You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying.

You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying.

You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying.

You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying.

You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. beautiful she's so real they really kept that under wraps i didn't know that she was going to

be in it no but oh my god you know you know the story of when me and bowen went to go see it no well we went to go see it and we were so high and bowen had no idea that she wasn't in it and like the very first seconds of the movie makes clear that she is dead as a doornail. And Bowen turns to me and goes, is Meryl Streep not in this? And I go, she's not in it. She's not in it at all. She's dead. And I laugh out loud.

And he goes, then why are we here? For Amanda Seyfried. I was like, for Cher in an hour and a half. But the Cher was worth it. Okay, the Cher was what I thought the Merrill would be. Like I expected.

Yeah, okay, I don't have to explain. Thank you. But thank God we had Cher. The Cher was still great. It was still great. But like that's like the Merrill. I thought it would be more. I thought Merrill would be like helicopter and ha ha.

Helicopter and ha ha. be like helicopter and ha ha helicopter in ha ha beautiful we all deserve that role someday sorry we're all we're all actors we all deserve that we all deserve the helicopter and ha ha i think that's true though everyone needs their helicopter and haha moment even like even like a slowly descending the stairs to great fanfare moment like we all deserve that if it can't be one it has to be the other post makeover i think it's like if it's a joke that you're bigger than the movie that's a helicopter and haha yeah yeah she doesn't need this helicopter if your participation is a plot point. New York City. Everyone is a gossip. You ain't seen nothing yet. Here to be in Germanic. With the Real Housewives of Potomac. Oh my gosh, can I take this in? It's going to be amazing.

New York City. Everyone is a gossip. No one gets a happier life. Salt Lake City. We don't wear costumes, we wear fashion. And below deck sailing. You broke the rules and now you're here getting upset. Watch all new seasons on Bravo or stream it on City TV+. Let's have a real good time.

I'm Julian Edelman. I'm Rob Gronkowski. Guess what, folks? We're teammates again. And we're going to welcome you guys all to Dudes on Dudes. I'm a dude, you're a dude, and Dudes on Dudes is our brand new show. We're going to highlight players, peers, guys that we played against, legends from the past, and we're just going to sit here and talk about them.

And we'll get into the types of dudes. What kind of types of dudes are there, Gronk? We got studs, wizards. We got freaks. Or dudes dude. We got dogs. Dogs. We'll break down their games.

We'll share some insider stories and determine what kind of dude each of these dudes are. Is Randy Moss a stud or a freak? Is Tom Brady a dog or a dude's dude? We're going to find out, Jules. New episodes drop every Thursday during the NFL season. Listen to Dudes on Dudes on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

I felt too seen. Dragged. I'm NK, and this is Basket Case. So I basically had what back in the day they would call a nervous breakdown. I was crying and I was inconsolable. It was just very big, sudden swaps of different meds. What is wrong with me? Oh, look at you giving me therapy, girl.

Finally, a show for the mentally ill girlies. On Basket Case, I talk to people about what happens when what we call mental health is shaped by the conditions of the world we live in. Because if you haven't noticed, we are experiencing some kind of conditions that are pretty hard to live with. But if you struggle to cope, the society that created the conditions in the first place will tell you there's something wrong with you, and it will call you a basket case. Listen to Basket Case every Tuesday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hey everybody, it's Matt Rogers. Back when I was a server, I was one bad day away from a huge personal crisis. Thankfully, Giving Kitchen is here to serve those that serve us. Giving Kitchen is a nonprofit helping any food service worker who gets hurt, gets sick, loses a family member or their housing. That's giving relief. So when you or someone you know is in crisis, tell them to ask for help from Giving Kitchen by visiting givingkitchen.org slash help. That's givingkitchen.org slash H-E-L-P. Together, we are Giving Kitchen. We help food service workers. Girls, I'm truly so overjoyed and honored to be with you. I really am. I'm sorry. I know this is the thing that Mitra hates,

but these are some of my favorite humans. I agree. And listen, Mitra is one of my favorite humans. I would not podcast without her. No, but we laugh. But like, you guys really are some of my favorite humans. It's not a joke when we say that you guys are some of our favorite humans. No, but see, I know it's not a joke when we say that you guys are some of our favorite humans no but i know it's not a joke but when you say it this it's it's sort of helicopter there's something about it

it's very young life to say humans yeah like like like like youth group like yes church kids yeah love these amazing humans. You know what though? It's pretty inclusive. Yeah. Young life? It is. It's everyone.

It's everyone. Wait, the word, like humans or young life? Yeah, humans. Okay. Oh, okay, okay. We thought you were talking about young life. Young life wants any religion in.

How do we, but how do we express an earnest thought that is completely detached does not have any irony to it that like i'm like i'm so happy to be with my friends right i feel like everyone i feel like you know who's really good at that mitra you 100% know when mitra is genuine always because i'm crying because she's crying and you feel like you have to do a lot of work to like sort of make sure she's okay just kidding but like yeah you are

you're very good at being a like like step away sidebar this is my genuine feeling and I love you heart to heart hug moment good friend you really are and it's beautiful because she's just as good as being the opposite and like truly calling

and then sometimes you can be a total stunty bitch that's not true that's not true and I'm sick of you guys I'm sick of this shit and you know what I do say the slur. No, she doesn't.

Another front runner for title of ep. I do say the slur. Really, really, really want to make it clear. I don't. She doesn't. She doesn't. She would be the last person. You know what I was just thinking?

What? What you guys could do as a stunty thing. Like, if you guys, if we got into like sort of a fight at the end of this episode and then you guys didn't come on the podcast for 60 years and then in 60 and then in 60 years you guys come back and our all our listeners will die then that will be when when they all die of joy and happiness and catharsis and this is you saying

you don't want us to come back for a really long time we're running no you guys aren't no you guys aren't allowed back for 60 years but Matt's saying we set up like a

Kill Bill Volume 3 thing where it's like we create the conflict our children when they have podcasts come back I wouldn't wish that on my child basically

my child. My child won't be allowed to even... My ancestors in Iran were some of the first... You know, ancient Persians actually invented podcasting. Anna's family has been producing them for centuries. Jahar Zadeh, of course. Who do you think is the Bowen and who do you think is the Matt of Mitra and I's podcast? Can you guess?

I can guess. It's interesting. I think I'm the Mitra and Matt's the Joel. No, it's reverse. It's reverse. Steve, but Joel feels he has an authority to say this, but you can't see your own podcast. I think he is.

You can't see your own podcast. It he is you can't see your own podcast it's like when you look in a picture it's not really you you can't see your own I'm the Matt and Mitra's the Bowen that's what I just said oh see and that energy

that's Matt is why use code urgent at checkout i love that the code that people have to use to use a therapy site for you is urgent urgent urgent urgent well and speaking of better help there's no better place to chat with your online therapist than a Casper mattress my former employer shout out oh my god what a what a fun moment when a lot of Brooklyn alt comedians working at Casper that was that was nice there from the beginning was so special working in that showroom from the ground up love you guys. Are you still a company woman? I actually do have a Casper mattress.

Same. Well, actually, Helix Girls. So the fact that you did that sort of started a war. Wow. And this can be where the fight starts. Remember this? We're breaking the story. Ooh, a little bit.

Blue sky, blue sky, blue sky. Blue sky, blue sky. It's so fun to be in the blue sky phase because you can say anything you can do anything my character Mitra has huge tits we'll talk about that a little bit more

Mitra actually because you you have been considering the procedure are you gonna get big knockers I said to Joel that I thought it would be

really funny if one day I had huge tits. We're there. I think we're all at that age now where we're thinking and we're in 2020. We're like at this age in 2020 where it's kind of like, yeah, you think about a procedure you want sometimes. I don't think that would be the one for me, but I do think like just in terms of like personality, I would be a really funny person to just walk out with like big tits out of nowhere. Just like someone who like doesn't, I don't really like dress for my body. I wonder what a men's large t-shirt would look like over Mitra with huge tits

I literally today I got some new jeans and I put them on and they fit great and I was like I have to tell Joel he's gonna be really proud of me oh my god I so Greta came over the other day and I we were trying to figure her um outfit out for a self-tape and Joel gave me a shirt that looks historically hot on him. And he let me have it. And I was like, oh my God, it only sort of worked on me.

And I told him it really worked on Greta. Oh my God. Random that something looked great on the hottest person. And she goes, she goes, it's cute. I wonder if I should just, and she sort of tied it up and like her waist and like tightened it and like

rolled up the sleeve. I was like, she's like, I wonder if I should just do this. And I was like, oh, you're ready for the cover of the hottest teen mag. How are some people so effortlessly

stunning? I'm sorry, keep going. Wait, that wasn't a real question? I know. It is. It's crazy. She really has. She has a je ne sais quoi.

For sure. Agreed. She tied it up. And then I was like, and then she added insult to injury. I was like, you should keep it. It looks really good on you. And she was like, no, you have it. So like she gave it back to me.

And so now every time I put it on, I'll know it wasn't mine to begin with. It looked hot on Joel. And it was taken from me. And so now every time I put it on, I'll know it wasn't mine to begin with. It looked hot on Joel. And it was taken from me, tried on, looked stunning, and handed back. And said, make it work. Our bodies are different.

No, they're not. At the end of the day, everyone has the same body. And that's beautiful. Everyone is the same. Proportions. I want to clarify what I said earlier earlier which is that we are at that age where we're thinking about procedures but i but i want to clarify that i put i want to contextualize this and i keep talking about this gia tolentino piece in

the new yorker about instagram face and about how like we're moving in the direction where like self-care will or where cosmetic procedures are going to be sort of a way under the umbrella of self-care under the umbrella of self-care where it's like going to the spa is like getting your like getting a filler or something you know and i feel like that's already like housewives yeah yeah of just like i take care of myself and i see that online a lot of like getting the getting like you're taking care of yourself by getting the procedure that you want to get. That's like you taking care of yourself.

For sure. I'm, I probably, I've probably quoted this before, but at the end of this piece, like she, if you quoted it before, she,

she, she interviews the, like the, like the biggest, like Beverly Hills plastic surgeon or person or whatever, who like works with Kim Kardashian. And he's like, you know,

that feeling when you get a great haircut and you look in the mirror and you're like this is the best version of myself? That is the feeling you get from these procedures times a thousand. You're just like this is the way I think I should look.

And it's terrifying because we all want that feeling in a way. In a way we do. Sorry no no speak on everyone's behalf it's weird how many more times I've been like well you could just do this like to little things yeah because you feel like it's available um and yeah it's probably because it is very standardized it's not technically available like I'm not gonna like it doesn't fit into my life

well what do you want done we'll figure out if it's available we can look it up so Matt just pulled back and I have an underbite so I wanna like but that's like orthodox you need a new chin that's not orthodox that's like maxillofacial stuff but like i i want like a apologize again bitch i want like

i'm so sorry i want like a this and is it so fucked up that we're talking about this so what you're saying is you want to you want to you want a man's chiseled chin no it's not it doesn't have to be chiseled it just it just needs to be like well it will literally be chiseled chin. No, it doesn't have to be chiseled. It just needs to be like... Well, it will literally be chiseled. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That is what would be used. A chiseler. See, like Joel has a chiseled chin.

Has a chiseled jawline. He makes that face. So we should take his. Let's take his. Give your chin for Bowen. I would give more than my chin for Bowen can you assign heart donor things

to certain people I know you can sign up to be a heart organ all these things donor but can I specify who I want to have it I don't think so unless they need it immediately I want you to have my heart Joel I want want to have it? I don't think so. I don't think, unless they need it immediately.

I want you to have my heart, Joel. I want you to have my brain, Mitra. I want you to have my stomach, Bowen. Okay. Oh my God. Why did Mitra get the smallest one and Bowen got the biggest? I didn't really think about it. I just kind of want you guys to have things of mine.

I'm going to do really good stuff with your brain. Do we get them transplanted or do we just keep them like in a jar? It's not up to me. I'm putting it in a dog. Talking dog. That dog is going to sing. It's going to be singing. A Christmas show. Matt, we haven't talked about this.

What? Have you heard of Christmas? I was thinking the other day, I was like, it's such a shame that- Yeah, no, that's my favorite Christmas culture. That is actually my favorite. That is literally the only piece of Christmas. I've gone to Matt's Christmas show every year since it started happening. And that is really my only Christmas tradition. I genuinely genuinely it makes me so happy when you come every year and Joel finally

saw it this year I know it's it's not for lack of trying no I know that I I I know it's brilliant it's it's truly brilliant thank you babe it it is really it's honestly if I can be honest it's definitely like put a real cloud over this time of year because it's that thing that i get to do at the end of the year that i feel like pulls me out of a funk um and i just feel like it didn't happen you should do it once like whatever to be cute in july just to get it in yeah i hope to do it in in like may july but may june july i feel like charrette and then i thought to myself like did i severely fuck up by not finding a way to do it on streaming or like

like in any way even on my instagram being stupid like why didn't i do this but then i was just like i'm not in the mood you know what i mean it's weird and i'd rather just save it it's such an in the room thing and like yeah like that the i don't want to like ruin anything but like the moment at the end where you like you really like involve us like we get there

it's my favorite thing I yeah you're right I should it has to be presented in the right way I can't just like toss it out there

and it has to be July because of the Christmas in July of it all you gotta you gotta you gotta also I feel like next year people like also I could you could technically do a Christmas show at any time during the year July because of the Christmas in July of it all. You gotta, you gotta, you gotta. Also, I feel like next year people like,

also I could, you could technically do a Christmas show at any time during the year. It would just be funny that it wasn't happening during Christmas. Maybe. Anyone will go at any time. Yeah. It's that, it's that good.

It's one of the funniest things you can do actually is put a Christmas thing in the middle of. It's actually hilarious because think about the opposite factor and that's what they call it in comedy the opposite factor you know what i mean it's like sort of like like when you see when you see a fireman and like he's like doing a real tough thing and then takes off his helmet and it's like it's a little girl it's like there's like an opposite factor in their presentation well because and that and then it's and then that's the that's like the idea the big hollywood movie is it's a fireman but she's also a little girl who goes to school sold and you know that's a movie with like the rock yeah and the rock the the rock and millie bobby brown yeah and so what's his role in it because Because he's not the fireman. He's the reluctant trainer.

Yeah, he's the trainer. He trains her for fire. Yeah, and she's like, come on, put me in coach. And this takes place. That accent is amazing. This takes place in Britain. They don't have firemen over there. Yeah, it's so soggy there.

Like nothing catches a breath. Is that true? Yeah. No. Wait, what? Whenever, if Joel says something, I immediately go, it's true. You're wrong.

Well, the thing is, he's presenting. I still don't know. I'm still like, but what about all the chimneys that famously are swept there? This is the Taylor Momsen. The Taylor Momsen is dead sort of moment. Yeah, are there firefighters in Britain? I mean, this shouldn't be,

that shouldn't be the title of it, but wouldn't it be funny? It's not funny. If Taylor Momsen is dead was the title? Yeah, it's like you breaking the news. Taylor Momsen, dead at 32. No. No. I feel bad. She's not funny Taylor Monson dead at 32 no no

I feel bad she's not 32 I feel bad Taylor Monson is pretty reckless she's not 32 how dare you I think she's young

historically she's historically young young girl she's like epically goth now epic goth she's an epic Taylor Monson

dead at 32 is funny because it's sort of like a prediction. Oh, no. Joel. Okay.

Ready? Star or actress Taylor Momsen? Neither. Neither. Rockstar. Rocker. Rockstar. Rocker.

She wasn't, she wasn't, I think she was both when she did, where are you Christmas? When she was a child in the grinch yeah she acted the hell out of that role she was such a powerful actress in that role no one else could have done what she did no one in the grinch she gave a grounded she was grounded cindy lou who she was gritty she was

real Dakota Fanning who? Taylor Monson and Grinch take a hike, Hollywood said take a hike Dakota market correcting Miss Elf that's right

the earth is healing could Elf Fanning ever have done what Taylor Monson did in that role yes Al Fanning The Earth is Healing could Al Fanning ever have done what Taylor Momsen did in that role yes she was iconic

in Babel was she in Babel yeah she's a little girl who got lost she was very much the little girl in Babel oh my god also don't forget

she's the star of the biggest films maleficent she's the star of maleficent the biggest films in the world these are huge blockbusters maleficent maleficent 2 these are blockbuster films oh my god maleficent 2 you guys you guys should watch that one oh Oh my god. When the dragon? When the dragon? When the dragon? Girl.

When the dragon? You can't see it readers but I'm doing sort of a dragon claw. What do you guys think of like Matt's like I think Matt is so expressive with his hands in a way that not a lot of other people are. I just like there's so much energy It's because he's from New Jersey. I'm from fucking Long Island, New York. He consistently does this to me.

He regionalizes me and he sort of tosses us all in. But you know what? There's differences between New Jersey and New York and Long Island. Damn. And that's the conversation we need to be having in this country right now. Yes, the differences between New Jersey and New Yorkers.

No, we shouldn't talk about us at all. It's the one Housewives franchise I will refuse to watch as Real Housewives of New Jersey. Why? What did they ever do? Because it's too real for me. They're criminals? Oh, okay. No, it's literally too real.

I see family and friends in it. I'm like, oh God. To me, it's so dark and real. And then going to jail, I'm like, god to me it's so dark and real and i'm going to jail i'm like yeah people i know could go to jail that's why i don't watch hillbilly elegy yeah because you see too much you see too much of you yeah did you try to watch it i haven't yet but i will i haven't either i mean i'm excited but i just haven't had like the the night i'm gonna i'm gonna need to make a night excited, but I just haven't had like the, the night I'm going to, I'm going to need to make a night of it.

And I just haven't had that night yet. Right. Popcorn and everything. Popcorn, box of tissues. For all that comes. That's going to be a big night. But really,

I haven't watched Shaws of Sunset for that reason. I, I, I, I just can't. There is no Asian. there is no real like i know east asian housewives equivalent um huh i think you can you can do like like korean rich korean kids in like la or something that would be fun i definitely you could do like parachute kids too what's that parachute kids it's like um when um they send over like oh yeah yeah yeah um kids to like go to really good schools over here right and they're

living basically alone sometimes and like they're very very wealthy and they um yeah that's a parachute and they need a reality show yeah they, they do. And the last thing that's sort of missing from their development is they need a reality show. I'd love to watch that. They'll sort of skyrocket at that point. Well, yeah. I think that's what it takes to sort of bring awareness to these people is that they're on a show.

I would watch. I would totally watch. I would be, I mean, I'll watch anything about someone with more money than me. It is kind of funny. Like, as of late, I've been watching so much Architectural Digest home tours. And just being like, oh, the fireplace. Yes, the ceiling. Like, noticing things.

Like, home design and all of that has become a real interest of mine. And it, the more money, the better. The more I can never be able to afford it, the better I'm watching. Liv Tyler's was my name. Her being like,

so nobody actually like knew what wallpaper was, but then I got wallpaper and then people started using wallpaper. So I sort of love that about me. Hers is just like, this is a door that's really big. This is another door that's even bigger. And Nicole Scherzinger's. She's like, I love gray and black. My look is very modern.

It's very modern in that everything in my home looks like death my favorite thing about Liv Tyler's was when she's like outside and she's like there's

and over there are my neighbors they're my friends yeah I have friends setting the example befriend your neighbors the one I just watched Greta was over and we watched dita von teese and it was so it was just her whole home is an extension of her brand really

she goes yeah there's actually not a comfortable place to sit in the entire house she was fully like you can't use or do anything here so my bed is actually a girdle it's just like all it's like there's taxidermy ethical taxidermy everywhere how is it ethical what is that because the animals died of natural causes first the animals were fucked to death by you yeah you say i love you they were made love to death you fuck them until they have a heart attack and die from ecstasy. And then you're allowed to stuff them.

That's legal. Holy in America. Okay, and then basically, the animals die of natural causes and you're allowed to hang them up in your home. Wow. So you let them get so old and ugly and then you pull them up. What you do is you adopt one.

You adopt an endangered species. And then when it dies, you get to hang it up in your house. So cool. So rad. Epic steampunk slay. I do. We'll be wear costumes. We wear fashion. And below deck sailing. You broke the rules and now you're here getting upset. Watch

all new seasons on Bravo or stream it on City TV+. I'm Julian Edelman. I'm Rob Gronkowski. Guess what, folks? We're teammates again. And we're going to welcome you guys all to Dudes on Dudes. I'm a a dude you're a dude and dudes on dudes is our brand new show we're gonna highlight players peers guys that we played

against legends from the past and we're just gonna sit here and talk about them and we'll get into the types of dudes what kind of types of dudes are there girls we got studs wizards we got freaks or dudes dude we got dogs dog We'll break down their games. We'll share some insider stories and determine what kind of dude each of these dudes are. Is Randy Moss a stud or a freak? Is Tom Brady a dog or a dudes dude? We're going to find out, Jules. New episodes drop every Thursday during the NFL season.

Listen to Dudes on Dudes on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I felt too seen. Dragged. I'm NK, and this is Basket Case. So I basically had what back in the day they would call a nervous breakdown. I was crying, and I was inconsolable. It was just very big, sudden swaps of different meds. What is wrong with me?

Oh, look at you giving me therapy, girl. Finally, a show for the mentally ill girlies. On Basket Case, I talk to people about what happens when what we call mental health is shaped by the conditions of the world we live in. Because if you haven't noticed, we are experiencing some kind of conditions that are pretty hard to live with. But if you struggle to cope, the society that created the conditions in the first place will tell you there's something wrong with you. And it will call you a basket case. Listen to Basket Case every Tuesday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey everybody, it's Matt Rogers.

Back when I was a server, I was one bad day away from a huge personal crisis. Thankfully, Giving Kitchen is here to serve those that serve us. Giving Kitchen is a non-profit helping any food service worker who gets hurt, gets sick, loses a family member or their housing. That's giving relief. So when you or someone you know is in crisis, tell them to ask for help from Giving Kitchen by visiting givingkitchen.org slash help. That's givingkitchen.org slash H-E-L-P. Together, we are Giving Kitchen kitchen we help food service workers here's a good question what celebrity while current celebrity do you think

might be guilty of taxidermy mel gibson of no poaching poaching mel gib Gibson. Mel Gibson. I have one for Mel Gibson. Who's a poacher? I think Lady Gaga secretly likes to hunt. I think she's expressed. For some reason during her, of course, when she was promoting Joanne, she was like, yeah, I've shot a gun. She's like, I've shot guns before. Yeah. Shoot cans off of my uncle's fence.

Whatever. I'm like, okay, Gaga. Gaga poaches to promote Joanne. But I think she's like shot at animals before and she kind of likes it. One thing, what do you guys think when you see like, you know, just a gay person that you know,

and then they go home and all of a sudden it turns out they hunt with their family. Do they exist? Yeah. just a gay person that you know from la from new york just like whatever they're just out whatever and then they go home to see their family and they are straight up hunting and carcasses i actually know exactly who Matt is talking about. And I've experienced this as well. But carcasses. Do I know this person? No. Do I know?

Okay. Joel, what were you saying? I was just agreeing with Matt that I've experienced this phenomenon as well. So I recognize who you're recognizing and I see you sister. And I want to tell you it's that person and subsequently other people i followed turns out are like big game like no game hunters but like but you know they're out there you know shooting geese they're out there you know

deers are taking bullets it's kind of crazy deers are are taking bullets. I mean, I don't mean for us to sound like soft-handed city people who are like, hunting. Well, I was about to say, I feel like it's not that shocking for me because so many people from where I'm from are looking to hunting. Yeah, but the gay ones? I don't know.

That is the question. Yeah. Maybe not. I don't know. I guess I never thought about it before. I'll check in. I'll check in. So many of the people I went to high school with are private and it kills me because what I really want is just I want like 15 minutes of scrolling through 800 photos and then I'm never going to look again.

But I don't want to look again and but I but I don't want to follow for that experience I want to just be able you don't want to alert them to your presence you want to be able to do it anonymously yes yes it's truly blessed and miraculous that I've only had maybe four people total from high school like ever feel like reaching out to me over any medium and I'm like this i i i hacked it i did it like no one's like hitting me up crawling out of the woodwork like from that part of my life that time in my life being like hey how you doing i'm like i have no real interest in seeing you or even being reminded that you exist and this is how it should be lucky okay very lucky i don't know i

mean when i would see everyone was at when you'd go home for thanksgiving or christmas and see everyone at the bar the night before thanksgiving or at the board the night before christmas eve and i feel like wouldn't get the damn invitation and i loved it sorry i keep going you would have to just show up at maxwell's in our town and everyone would be there and yes it was called maxwell's well if you ever want to come to a million weddings please let me know are you still going to a lot of weddings from high school i mean not this year but i was i did have several from high school this year that i was going to go to and yeah i i'm i'm going to at least four like whenever weddings start again yeah i had i had i

think four or five that were moved to next year too it just seemed like this was the sweet spot I fucking love weddings I go to all of them I do like a wedding because it's free food you drink so much you see your buddies I'm looking at a picture

of Mitra and I at a wedding let's see it oh my god first of all you guys look hot picture of Mitra and I at a wedding. Wait. Let's see it. Oh my God. First of all, you guys look hot. Wow. You guys look gorgeous. What wedding is that? That's Megan Gailey and CJ Toledinos.

Oh, love. We love Megan and Siege. Mitra, your hair looks so good in that. Oh my God. Thank you. Yeah, it looks like shit today as usual a pleasure to see you joel do you feel like that's another thing about weddings too is you do get to get a little you know gussied up and that's sort of the thing that you know i yeah i like you know

like getting ready for a picture like number of prom number of prom pictures i have a story about prom okay so this well it's a it's a saga so my big my my big prom story is that my junior year of prom i have two stories actually and my junior year of prom i went with a senior okay this is important because he graduated and we had a really bad time at prom. He graduated. And then his senior year, he had won the talent show. That's an important detail. So my senior year, he sang.

So my senior year, we have the talent show again. And if you are the winner of the talent show, you are allowed to return and perform at the subsequent year's talent show, even if you are graduated. So he returned to perform and he sang a song about me called Medusa. Oh my God. In front of 700 people. Medusa. Can I ask,

did they all in the audience know you were Medusa? Yeah, I remember turning to my friend and she was dating his really close friend. And I remember turning to her and I was like, is this about me? She was like, yeah. And she couldn't give you the heads up? I don't know if she knew, but-

She didn't know Medusa was being performed? No, but I think it was just like, but it was like, this is clearly about you. Because I was really like, maybe you're being insane being insane like not everything's about you bitch do you remember what any of the lyrics were it was like um i actually had him send me the lyrics like several years later and he was like very like game about it but it was something about like her like her stare it was very like high school boy like her stare turns me to stone blah blah blah like but then it like was like the way it ends is like now i reject her and i turn her to stone he took the power he yeah he took the power back from me he took back the

night from me because i didn't write you were such a medusa. You were a fucking monster. Refusing to kiss. Oh my God. To write a song called Medusa either means you are a boy who just graduated high school or you're like a 45-year-old pop star. Or you're Ava Max. What worse thing?

Or what, Joel? Or you're Ava Max. Or you're Ava Max, exactly. what worse thing or what or what joel or your ava max yes i can see her having like a single called medusa medusa it's i love it already i really do i immediately, the song that came in my head was in the, I don't remember what it became, but Berka. It became Aura. It became Aura. Yes, but all the lyrics

stay the same. It's basically like, they just change it to Aura. Do you really want to peek behind the girl, the girl behind the burqa behind the aura behind the burqa Behind the burqa

And then of course You're Lebanese, you're Orient And then also Is it the next album where she has Gypsy? Yeah Gypsy, Gypsy, Gypsy, hey Unfortunately Gypsy is a fucking Gypsy, Gypsy, Gypsy, hey. Unfortunately, Gypsy is a fucking great song,

but it has that title. It really is. But is Lady Gaga uncancellable? I hope so. It really does feel. Yeah, where was the, I guess there must have been dialogue about Berka, but. You would assume.

There was absolutely dialogue about Berka. But the song got fully produced. That's the thing. It's like these things make it through. Someone's not saying something. It's really wild. I mean, if you get that ultra world famous at 23, then yeah, your brain is going gonna be broken enough to be like

yes this is worth pushing through all the way at that point i feel like you have to hire someone that hates you to be on your team and be like this is a this is bad you just need someone to be like no you need one negative you do you remember that story that came out um that was like probably like somebody who was friends with perfume genius was like perfume genius and adele were at this this event with lady gaga and lady gaga was like do you want to hear my new album this is right before chromatica came out and um she listened to the she played them the whole album, and then Adele sent everyone out of the room, and was like,

this album's terrible, you cannot release this album. But it wasn't Chromatica, right? It didn't end up being, or it was Chromatica? Well, we don't know. We don't know. Oh, right, that's right.

Yes, I remember this story. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry, go on. So Adele was, where was Adele for Berka, is sort of the story. She hadn't yet really hit her stride yet. Yeah.

They just didn't align for Berka. You know what I mean? Like if only. Well, all the stars aligned. But Adele, Adele is someone who 25, like she played it for Rick Rubin and he was like,

she played like a demos of other songs and he was like you can't release this and she was like okay and I'm gonna rewrite I'm gonna redo the whole thing and then she ended up releasing 25 so it's she's she's just paying that forward because someone else did that to her which is like perfect you know but it would be hard to have to look into Lady Gaga's eyes and be like do another album like you must have like adele must have and she's earned a lot of like confidence like to just be like to lady gaga who's lady gaga be like you must record a new album yeah okay lady gaga you must record a new album this is bad babe you have to new album. She's the fucking face

of Dior yet. You gotta do a new one. It's bad. I want that job. I want that job. To be like, no. Yeah. This is crazy

and not like good. Back to the drawing board. Change it to aura, babe. Yeah, it's burka. It needs to be aura. Yes, Dirty. Keep one burka in the lyrics

and the verse and the bridge. You can have one burka as a treat. And then takes a little slurp of his water. Okay, well, hold on.

Everyone say one thing that's been unaddressed so far and then we can move on i just feel like i came here to talk about culture i sort of came here you know to discuss and share thoughts about culture and i haven't been really given a platform to do that and i've been sort of standing by here and watching you guys sort of run your podcast into the ground in front of Mitra and I, but I, you know,

and I stood back and I sort of said, I'm going to let this happen. And Mitra agrees with me. She's been chatting me the same thoughts sort of this whole time. And we've, and it's been freeing, honestly, to sort of sit back and sort of not have to sear a conversation.

Cause it's not our house. It's not Mitra and I's house today. You know, like it's your house. Okay, I understand that. And it hurts me to hear, but this is the exact point I was making earlier that I ended up apologizing for ironically, but I take it back because this is what I'm saying.

You guys are not friends. You guys should be the friends to say, hey, reverse reverse change your course and and you and you haven't done that because we're in your house i i'm agreeing with joel wait a minute it's the three of you against me yeah yeah this sucks uh i'm kind of just figuring out um where i stand on this um yeah yeah i'm really mad at you bowen i want to know a i want to know what take because

we don't have them okay i'll we we should all go around round robin and do it a cultural take I'll start the flight attendant corny and bad Kaylee Cuoco and Estonian as in Jen I think she's great but I think the show is stupid and bad it's possible to pull positive things

who let him back on TV well he's having a big week he's back on Grey's Anatomy. Whoa. Is he really? Meredith is in her COVID coma and is seeing dead people. And so,

it is crazy to think that they're doing that as a storyline. And so, she's walking around on this beach and she's running into dead into and which is just of which is telling the show telling on itself for how many people it's killed off how did it kill tr night oh babe he got hit by a bus so badly that his entire body was unrecognizable and a big twist in the episode that he dies in is basically this trauma patient is george oh my god they're holding hands with him and he like signs into their hand i'm george

oh yeah literally yeah but he's unrecognizably run over by a bus getting hit by a bus of course life itself moment if anyone remembers that movie use. I think at least two, maybe three times. So it's a theme. It is a theme. Not enough of it. Not enough of it. Okay.

But I was in the first three episodes. And then by the end of episode four, I was like, Oh, this is actually terribly, terribly constructed, unfortunately, but Kaylee great.

Rosie love, but I will watch it. I will watch every episode. It doesn't stay on the rails. That's for sure. But I'm sure we're going to watch every episode. And there might be something interesting happening with Rosie Perez on it. Rosie Perez playing a character named Megan.

Megan Briscoe. Megan Briscoe. But it's so weird how, I don't, I just finished the first Spider-Man game where like the main, the main villain is like a Chinese guy who has a gang of Chinese people like chase you,

chase you around the city. And then I just hot off the heels of that. I'm watching the flight attendant where like the, the bad threatening, scary people are like these Korean men who are like following all the characters around. And I'm like, what is this? I'm not saying there's like a problematic thing going on.

I'm just like, why am I like drawn to these things where like... Yeah, you're the problem. I think that is a really good takeaway. You should really lean into that, that it's your fault. Well, I'm just like, why am i like stumbling on these like these pieces of media that are all like these asian men in suits are scary i don't know well it's because they're the people are like oh god the terrorist thing is so tired like we've kind of cycled through every single middle eastern actor that has and ever will be so we have to

like find somewhere else until like we have to do a couple more asian age into age into the working we need a fresh crop yes what are people scared of now china yeah sure sure um okay that's a good that's a good take joel i have a take okay i am up to date on what I'm calling the Hulu's a teacher. And on Hulu's a teacher. You're the one who's calling it that? It is that. He's adding Hulu's in front of it as Matt's trademark. I'm saying, I don't like just saying I'm watching a teacher. Yeah.

I'm watching Hulu's a teacher. It's founder of Hulu weans, the teacher. Yes. Yes. Yes. And in watching that, I have discovered that Kate Mara is actually a capital T talent. Welcome. Welcome home, Dan. And I know that I'm sort of like being welcome with open arms in a sort of me as Meredith Gray in a COVID coma running on the beach towards like, let's say, Christina moment.

And I really appreciate the work that she did in this last episode which is episode six but seven episodes will be out by the time this comes out readers who i'm sure are chomping at the bit to watch hulu's a teacher but in episode six the shit hits the fan so to speak and this is something that people say this is an expression of when the things get really crazy in the show and so things have gotten really crazy in the show and kate mara has displayed some quiet precise emotional just really stomach churning work how is love simon love simon is good and he has a name which is Nick Robinson but he will be known as Love Simon forever

and Love Simon is a talent and he really pulls it out and also he's good casting because we feel he's a teen but also he is older he's like 25 so it's weird because you're sort of watching it and you're like oh like there's chemistry there I kind of want these

two to fuck and then you're like oh wait like he's playing a there. I kind of want these two to fuck. And then you're like, oh, wait. Like, he's playing a 17-year-old in the show. That's so bad. And I do think it's weird what they've managed to do, or not what's weird what they've managed to do, but what we've accepted is, like, in Desperate Housewives, like, Eva Longoria is, like, this, like, vamp

who fucks, like, this 16-year-old in the show, which is the character of john who's played by a 30 year old i mean yeah i think that one is easy because he looks 100 he looks at her age and they're like he's 16 and it's like you never would but in this like you buy nick robinson as a teen but you know he's 25 so it's like the politics of it in your mind are kind of crazy but then the show is like no this is wrong they they bookend it with if you or someone you know has been a victim of grooming it like really explores that like the show is a lot if you or someone you know has been a girl doing improv

let's say it um but yeah the show the show ends up being more about the fallout of and uh sort of um abuse of the situation and less about like they're having a sexy affair which i think is great and is that's interesting to see a lead character which is a like a abuser that's a woman towards a male victim it's interesting what do you see in this? What's next for, for Kate? I think probably girl Thor. Yeah. Girl Thor.

I know Natalie Portman is doing it, but I'm sure she'll have to drop out for like to play Jackie, Jackie O again. And there's going to be a sequel to that. I heard. So she'll want to go do that. Yeah. It's called Jackie too.

And it's more her as like a little bit older and like shopping yeah she's got like different hair and stuff she's like shopping she has a new boyfriend um his name is onassis and it's like very hot yeah his name is onassis the guy 2, colon, his name is Onassis. And it's like a lot of them shopping and stuff and her more having fun in her later years. So she'll probably want to do that. And so Kate, American 2. The Long Island. The Long Island.

Jackie 2, like the way you say Jackie 2, Long Island. Did you see Jackie 2? Wait, did you see Spider-Man? It was so good, Long Island. Did you see Jackie 2? Wait, did you see Spider-Man? It was so good, I thought. They like every movie, those girls. I thought. Oh my God, Four Christmases? That was so good.

I thought that was so good, I thought. Okay, I have a culture. Go. Okay. I'm anticipating um my take is that botched is better than nip tuck wait and the two are of course sister shows come they are if you're me watching both of them that's like saying like the normal heart is better than rent. Like it is. It's because they're both sort of tangentially about the same thing.

It seems. Botched is a reality show. I couldn't hear a word you said, Joel. Botched is a reality show. Nip Tuck is famously a serialized Ryan Murphy drama. So go ahead. Say why. What's so good about Botched?

Botched, I would argue, gives you more, like, satisfying drama and catharsis every episode than Nip Tuck, and I've watched the first season of Nip Tuck now, for no reason. So you didn't get to the good part of Nip Tuck where there's, like, a killer? I just was like, why am I doing this yeah i never really stopped to ask why as soon as i did that it was time to stop watching did you find the show sexy no it really like every like it just felt like um like i don't i don't know like like tom cruise like bruce willis like it was very like, he's ripping the shirt open. Isn't that what you want?

It was a specific Tom Cruise sexiness. Tom Cruise. This, like, Tom Cruise, Bruce Willis attitude. Yeah. It felt like what it, like, what, like, it felt like what is, which was weird given the creator. But it's, like, felt like what a straight guy thinks a straight woman wants to see yeah like you want to be thrown up on the table you want to be like you want the man in charge to like it feels like a show for straight guys like it was really like that like

mr mr miami fucking and sucking all over town and his sports car and his house so fucking weird and bad yeah and coke off a stripper's ass then he kicks her to the curb and like takes big money and it was very like okay

and you were you weren't down to watch the second season I didn't make it there no but I I'm 10 out of 10 would recommend it

to absolutely anyone rather botched now that botched I have watched all of. Have you seen the plastic surgery show that has the female plastic surgeons on E? No, but I've seen a million commercials for it while watching Botched.

What's that called? What's that show called? Does anyone know? Bitch. It's called Bitch. Plastic Surge Hurry. it's called bitch plastic surge hurry fans of urgent care will know plastic surge hurry

surge hurry I feel like I feel like botched you know you've given me something you've inspired me Mitra I'm gonna watch botched I was like I want something that's like

reality but there's some like procedural element to it literally I mean I guess I was like, I want something that's like reality, but there's some like procedural element to it. I mean, I guess literally. And like, yeah, I want to finish. It's a show that like it, you can leave the room and come back and it's fine. Oh, perfect.

I would say if you really want a short-term answer to that, Dr. Pimple Popper is also a great one. I can't do it. It's so satisfying though. It's so satisfying. And I can't believe it's a full show because every episode is the same. Somebody's got a weird growth

and then she takes it off and it's a happy ending every single fucking time. Actually, one of the more angry times I've had with Wit was because one morning I woke up to him watching Dr. Pimple. Like the first thing I saw when I opened my eyes was a pimple being like exploding. I was so upset.

Even though it wasn't like, he didn't do anything that wrong, but I was really like, this is beyond the pale. No, that's an assault on your senses and it has to be talked about. It's bad to wake up to first thing in the morning. Wait, but how are you, how are you guys choosing what shows to watch anymore? Because at this point it feels like I'm being given an assignment by the internet, I guess, you know, where it's like, this is the show you got to watch. I don't fight with, I don't fight with any of it.

If people tell me I should watch it, I'm pretty much watching it unless I know it's going to upset me. There's something about quarantine though, that I find communal viewing very comforting. Like I'm watching a lot of live television. I'm watching a lot of like, for no reason, I could be watching these shows like on streaming commercial free, but for some reason, watching them live as it's happening and knowing that other people are

watching the same thing I'm watching brings me some weird amount of comfort. I've been really enjoying live texting housewives and people while watching it as it's happening. And I'm completely up to date on the mask singer literally those reality joel and i like consistently check in about dancing with the stars the voice like all these real we i i we didn't really watch the bachelorette this season but we thought about it we thought about it um and it here's what i think too it's like if there's nothing happening in our lives at least someone else is having a life we can watch things happen in.

I honestly think that that is what it is right now. It's just filling this. It has to be someone else's life. That's how that's active right now. Right. Because we talk about it like the way we would talk about our own lives. Like for me, I'm talking about how,

how things are going between Candace and Monique with the urgency. I would say some friends of mine like it's truly like i'll check in with people all the time and be like i just can't be team i'll never be team candace but i i know monique is wrong and it's just like this these are things i used to talk about like i have a certain you know cousin that's doing something but i'm just nothing's happening right so Candice and Monique you know I'm famously team Candice and have been and I find the discourse around team like the Candice Monique stuff to have shifted in a way because people are like well Candice runs

her mouth and you can't run your mouth like that and not expect some retribution and it's like that is the bedrock of all of these shows is women running their mouth like that if we are going to take the position that it is okay to enact violence on somebody for running their mouth like that. If we are going to take the position that it is okay to enact violence on somebody for running their mouth, then I'm sorry. There's a lot of women that need to get hit.

All of these women deserve to be beaten. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If I might say, my problem is not with the initial altercation of it all. I see that pretty clearly. She was wrong. I guess my problem with everyone in this situation is how they're just choosing to handle it.

Like Candace pressing charges to the point where she knows Monique is going to go to maybe prison for this and saying she wants it like prosecuted to the full extent of the law, knowing this woman has children. And the way that all the women are talking about it, because Monique obviously needs help with this problem, not to be put in jail. That's where I rub on the whole thing because I feel like they're just taking it too you know what Monique could have done though to avoid that is apologize I think apologize early and apologize I think

you're right but she has some there's something wrong with her she needs help for it I think that like it's all a big cry for help I don't know but yes also maybe she is Candace is not in charge of the sentencing I don't think she would be put in jail I really don't I really don't think she'd be put in jail it's just weird and do you so you think that Candace is doing Real Housewives Theater by saying she wants it pursued to the

full extent of the law I think she's dumb as a fucking box of rocks I don't think she knows how the system works but I don't think she knows how the system works but I don't think that the I don't think that the justice system would put Monique in prison and maybe that's naive of me but maybe that is

I don't think Candace is that dumb though out of out of all seven of them she's one of the smarter ones I would say Mitra are you a Potomac watcher I am Giselle is actually designing uh my house right now oh my god jewel tones jewel tones everywhere yeah i asked for hot pink black white uh chrome um fuchsia lots of zebra yeah and um, yeah. So it just sort of comes with the gun for what you can't handle looking at it anymore.

Can I reveal, can I reveal, I was going to reveal this on our podcast, Mitra, but I'll reveal it to you now. But I did get you a gift that is now been canceled because of, I got an email. So I ordered you one of Robin Dixon's hats for Christmas.

Oh my God. That's amazing. Oh my God. I cannot fulfill the order because of COVID. email so i ordered you one of robin dixon's hats for christmas oh my god oh my god i cannot fulfill the order because of covid i i ordered it weeks ago and i got an email recently that was like basically she was like i was like where's the hat and the email was basically like the hat will not be fulfilled so but even you getting order placing that order is the perfect fit. Yeah. Wait, but this is crazy to me. It's, it's co, maybe she just genuinely couldn't figure it out, but you gotta figure it out. Well, isn't it? It's the holiday season, it's on now.

It's not shocking that Robin Dixon couldn't figure out her small, her small hat business. We watched her sons fulfill the order. You're right. You're right. Oh my God. She owes $100,000 in backdrafts she does not know how to put a hat in a box she doesn't know on time in time for christmas oh my god joel that is an amazing gift that's really good we all gassed on this zoom reader if you could see

as soon as joel said the words oh my god i'm really sad i'm really sad that it actually might still come it just definitely won't come until next year sometime you're gonna get it in April 2021 when she's on to a new venture I can't wait and I'm gonna get you a bucket of LaDom

I watch this I watched this I watched this YouTuber her name is The Brooke Ashley and she goes over every episode of Potomac and she is firmly anti anti Monique

and I'm getting the sense now that a lot of the fan community is sort of positioning themselves anti Monique in a way where it makes me feel like sad because she won't come back to the show because I still am operating in this

world where they all return to the show, but they're not going to figure this out. Andy said they're all back. What? For season, for six, for the next season? Yeah. He literally said on everything iconic, I think, on a podcast. He was like, all of them are back,

including Wendy. Wow. Wow. Okay. That may be the fact that they couldn't film together. A lot of the time kept Monique in the game because for COVID during COVID. Yeah. Because I don't see,

unless that gets resolved. I think like, maybe he meant like offers are out, but like, so maybe she might opt to not come back but like she's not fired he's not wow so she she seems to want to stay as well i don't think it's a situation where she wants out either um well she said on the rear view like she wants to continue to be on the show to try to set her own narrative as long as possible like like and she she genuinely

felt that when everything rolled out, she'd be vindicated when it was shown on television. Yeah. No, not what happened. No. Decidedly,

no, we saw her go nuts. Who do we identify with on Salt Lake City? Have we all watched? Yes. I know mine.

I love Meredith. You're Meredith? But who do you identify with? You identify as a Meredith? I think... Joel... I think maybe I identify a little bit more with Mary. I feel like you're Whitney.

You're not Mary. Sure. No, actually, that's fair. Whitney, too. You feel like Whitney to me okay that's a little insulting

but I'll take it no I think no I love Whitney we love Whitney she's so fun Whitney the first two episodes was like who gives a shit and now I'm like

oh wait like you're like she like has she's good in the talking heads she is she's like a little more catty than like

she's getting catty as the talking heads go on which I love yeah she's starting to you know it's the talking heads go on. Yeah. Yeah. She started to, you know, say what she really thinks. The producers are finding her.

She is by far the most athletic housewife we've ever had. Watching her snowboard. Yeah. JLo in Hustlers was shook. Yeah.

I mean, yeah. Imagine any other housewife snowboarding. With that core strength. Yeah, I know. It's wild. Watching them like slwife snowboarding with that core strength yeah i know it's wild watching them like sleigh snowboarding i was like this is another that's colorado utah baby that's like ski culture it's like it's just part it's just you you gotta know how to do it well it's it's wild as sean mendez once said it is in their blood I feel I feel like Lisa

because I'm definitely Lisa because this is why Meredith comes to her to tell her something important about her life that she's separating from her husband and Lisa can't stop asking if it's going to make her cry she's like am I going to cry

will it make me cry I don't want to cry I think I'm going to cry i think i'm gonna cry i'm crying now and meredith ends up consoling her i think actually the more important thing about that scene though is her brain can i touch can i touch can i touch can i touch it was crazy can i touch can i touch that's mad and that woman is so uncomfortable being like you are actually that's my role that's that's who i've been yeah she was like you really want to touch you are the toucher aren't you it's like no bitch you can't touch this shit but i am one to stop at four different

fast food restaurants the way she's raising her children is definitely the way you would raise yours. And I think you, Bowen, are Meredith. Yeah, I'm Meredith. I'm disengaging. I'm not engaging. No. You're not going to look through my phone. You don't think I'm Meredith? I think maybe you're Meredith, but I'm trying to figure out if you give me Heather. You could be Heather too, but I think Mitra's Heather.

I think Mitra's Heather. Heather, I'm not quick enough to be heather she had a good episode she had a great don't clear the burger or the or the lollipop that i that is the moment where i was like i'm in yeah i'm so i i already liked heather but i was like her doing that i was like i'm with you with you her calling the uber driver being like i'm the flapper who has cankles flapper with cankles I'm a flapper with I'm like I love her she goes I'm looking like a flapper with I'm looking like a flapper with cankles I'm like great oh my god and also when

she goes when when the conflict was happening at the next table and she goes I mean I'll go over there if we make eye contact but if not I'm gonna wait for my lollipop chicken. Perfect. Perfect. I think it's Mitra. I think Mitra's Heather. Do you feel like Heather, Mitra? I was gonna say either Heather or Whitney. I think I'm one of the cousins. You have pioneer ancestors.

Just like my pioneer ancestors. Like my pioneer ancestors. I'm ready to blaze a new trail. A new trail. Also, the one that's good that no one talks about is when you take sheep shots, always expect a hangover. Oh my God. Lisa has a great one.

The worst is the jealousy is disease to which I say. I love it. To which I say I love it to which I say is psychotic it's literally a Pat Regan quote jealousy it is diseased to which I say get well soon it's so

it's perfect to which I say get well soon and I think you're probably wondering what i would say to jealousy to which i would say get well soon is what i would say to jealousy to which i would say whenever a disease exists i have to say something ultimately i think jens might be the worst it's the most low impact in this queen

I'm queen B and MVP Jen feels very much to me like she is she's the one who is most self-aware trying to give housewives

like she's the one she like she's like this I'm on a show and I should be doing I should be giving this for the show and that's and that's why it's not connecting for me.

And you know what's weird is she is in direct conflict with Mary, who I think feels like she has to do the housewives thing the least. She is not trying to say things like a housewife. She's not trying to act like a housewife. She's just being herself. She just is. And she just is. And she has an interesting storyline

doesn't have to like do anything to make conflict happen it's such a shame because jen is too it's like you've seven assistants babe that's not inherently interesting it's sad it's it's just not um something that like hooks us mary it's like oh my god there's so much going on here perfect this summer this champagne was made 5600 people died and they made the best grapes ever oh my god 5600 people died in the wildfires best grapes ever i was like she's the scariest person in the world terrifying are you guys following her on instagram oh yeah i should though you have to facetuned to oblivion these photos and it's their works of art their works of art oh my god i was just i was reading about her and her life and the scary woman well here's a question

could you fuck your grandfather no like would you fuck someone who who is married to your step who is married to your grandma oh i actually had a had a step-grandfather for a minute there, and I could never have fucked him. He was not the one. Not trying to fuck Charlie. I would never do it. I would never do it. No, neither of my grandpas were.

But for the grandmother to put it in the will, that's what's, it's not necessarily her fault. No, that's false though. There's a whole Reddit thread that broke this down. Basically, um, that, that is like sort of a,

like a fabrication of the, that Mary is taking cover behind. Oh, because there's a lot of friction between Mary's mother and Mary, because there's a lot of like, it's, it's game of thr of Thrones but with church basically because Mary's mother wanted

to take over the church and marry the grandfather and then he chose Mary instead and basically like it wasn't that the grandmother wanted it to happen that is Game of Thrones he basically was like hey everyone come here I need to pray about something and like was like just

if you say yes say yes to what I'm going to pray about something and was like if you say yes say yes to what I'm going to pray for and they all did and it was about marrying Mary basically. I'll find the Reddit thread and send it to you. I want to read all of it. I've read the same post. It's scary. What I need from a reader

is for them to replace the Real Housewives of Salt Lake theme song with the Game of Thrones theme song. I need to see these women come out and do Lake theme song with the Game of Thrones theme song. I need to see these women come out and do their taglines with the Game of Thrones theme song underneath. That's how I need to see Mary portrayed. It's dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun. I want that energy announcing my ladies.

I think you could do that. I want to pass it off to someone else because I don't trust myself with that. You think I could do that. I want to pass it off to someone else because I don't trust myself with that. You think I could do that? That's a huge compliment to me that you think I could do that. I think you're an incredible editor and you need to stop calling yourself short. I know inside you is an incredible editor. Not long ago, Matt Rodgers thought his laptop couldn't make PDFs and I quote.

I am positive it couldn't i'm telling you um bowen you didn't say your cultural take and then we do have to do out of it so honey i have so many don't i i thought you sort of did though well i had a i had a prompt which was who are who are each of us in salt lake city but um this is my take. Every streaming app should have a one. Netflix does this on iPad now and iPhone, but every streaming app should have a 1.5 speed option to watch it through. I don't like watching things regular speed.

I never listen to podcasts regular speed, audiobooks regular speed. Most YouTube videos I watch at 1.75 because you can change that. I don't think you should watch something. I don't have the time. None of us have the time of us have the speed of life is not fast enough for bowen the speed of natural life maybe maybe i need like maybe i i have some attention disorder but i'm just like i just can't do it i'm you would want to watch the flight attendant on 1.5 speed kelly

quoco doing flips babe there's there's so many movies on YouTube like especially like old Hong Kong movies that I've watched in its entire in their entirety at 1.5 speed enjoyed it so much more than I would have if I watched it and are you like only watching that or are you also like on your phone while it's on 1.5 knowing her I'm on my

phone I'm like less distracted if I'm watching it at like a quicker pace because I'm like truly there's something like agitating about me sitting through something that's like i can't i'll never watch the bachelor i'm so sorry because i cannot sit through even after commercials like an hour and 30 minutes well there's three out every episode is 13 hours right right so i can't do. So every single video platform has to have that. That's a general thing. I disagree.

I think that pace is purpose. And I believe that things should be. And I actually am on the record for saying that I would not want anyone to listen to this podcast or Urgent Care at 1.5 speed. I just, because I know the artists want to be heard the way that they're speaking. Well, Joel and I are actually, we record every episode several times. So there's an episode at normal speed and then there's an episode where we go, and then our episode is a bit long. And that's why you deserve the acclaim.

You understand. Acclaimed podcasters. Acclaimed podcasters. I think this is a beautiful segue into I Don't Think So, Honey. Don't you? Yes. This is I Don't Think So, Honey. This is our segment where we each take one minute to go off on something that's really...

The casual way we say when we describe what I Don't Think So, Honey is go off on something in culture. And then when Mitra comes in here, the deep shame we have about saying the words go off. It's so real. We go off on something in culture. Matt, do you want to go first? Yeah, I do okay this is matt rodgers i don't think so when his time starts now i don't think so honey there is not enough

conversation about miley's new album and i have been saying for months and months and even years and years that we our generation needs a pat benatar and she is giving you our generation's pat benatar and i feel that are people talking about it i don't think so honey should they be emphatic yes there are so many tracks on there that are so fucking good this song called high this song called angels like you very good this song called bad karma that has joan jett on it this song called hate me there are so many seconds so many very good songs on here and guess what i watched an interview with miley and she's been through a lot. Her house burnt the fuck down.

And she says that her voice is actually different and lower than it was before from the trauma of losing a house. So the fact that you're not appreciating her art post-trauma of losing her Malibu home is something that I personally don't think so, honey. Miley Cyrus is one of the defining artists of our generation. Bangers is a Shakespearean musical effort. And I don't think so, honey. If you don't know, now you know. That's one minute. What does a Shakespearean musical effort mean? It just

means good music. You understand? Okay. Yes. Yes. So sort of a Shakespearean you know how Shakespeare is good. Yes. When I say it's a Shakespearean musical effort, sort of transferring the quality of what he did to the music, if you understand.

I've been reading like an insane amount of Shakespeare in quarantine. Oh my God, Mitra. That is so amazing. No. But it would be so amazing. 12 seasons of Real House of Atlantalanta six seasons of botch and shakespeare and shakespeare on the side oh my god and leer yeah no god i love like 12th night oh my god i so am Viola Natalie Walker says you know

Housewives is Shakespearean the pathos is very Shakespeare anyway I guess you guys aren't a fan of Miley's new album

I love Miley's new I started it it's great Midnight Sky is I think one of her best songs I started it anyway

I love the duo with Dua too I think the song with Dua Paint Dust I think it's I love the duet with Dua too I think the song with Dua paid dust I think it's good yeah I mean

it's actually really charged the video has been described as very charged between them nice I can't wait

to check it out at this time it's gonna be Bowen Yang's I Don't Think So Honey and Bowen Yang your time starts now I Don't bow and yang's i don't think so honey and bow and yang your time starts now i don't think so honey books that don't have covers that have bumps on where the title is the title should have texture on the book cover otherwise i'm not

reading it do you know what i'm saying you want the letters yeah the title has to pop out it has to feel like i have to be able to reach over on my nightstand when it's dark and feel the cover and go, oh, yes, that's my copy of, you know, Exhalation by Ted Chiang, let's say. But I don't think so many Exhalation by Ted Chiang because, look, the cover doesn't have the bumpy letters. And I need that in order to feel like I'm reading a book. I need the tactile sensation that I'm reading a book. Otherwise, I could be reading a pamphlet or a benefit summary of my health insurance.

But no, I need my books to have some sort of character to them. And it needs to be on the cover because aesthetics are important and whoever said don't judge a book by its cover was a fool. And that's one minute.

Bowen wants more Braille-like letters. Yes, it is accessible. Yeah. Bump the letters up. Do you guys agree? It's not what Braille. I've never thought about it, but then now that it's been brought up,

I simply have no choice but to stand. Yeah, I totally agree too now that it's been brought up, I simply have no choice but to stand. Yeah, I totally agree, too, now that it's been brought up, finally. Thank you. That's what we do here. I agree, I guess. The letters should be bumpy. The letters should be bumpy on books. Like Goosebumps.

Like, you know how books for kids, like, they had bumpy letters? That's what I'm saying. Goosebumps got it right. Harry Potter, even. I know we kids, like they had bumpy letters. That's what I'm saying. Goosebumps got it right. Harry Potter even. I know we don't like Harry Potter anymore. But you have to give it up for the bumpy letters. You have to give it up for the bumpy letters. You have to give it up for the bumpy letters.

You can tell what book it is by touch. Who wants to go first? I think Mitro's will probably be better. So I'll go first. I definitely won't. Because I don't have one. Sort of signaling an unpreparedness.

I think you're effortless though. I think you have a lot of improv training. Well, I was going to ask. I know that this is for the live shows, but I wanted sort of a troll bowl. It's what I miss. Is that allowed? I actually have a good Troll Bowl for you.

Okay, great. So do you want to go Joel or mine? I'll go. I'll go. Okay, so Joel, this is going to be Joel's I Don't Think So, Honey. Or should me should go? I think the anticipation of the Troll Bowl is something I want the audience to sit with a little bit longer. So that being said, this is Joel Kim Boosters' I don't think so, honey. And his time starts now.

I don't think so, honey. Media, including COVID storylines in your shows and commercials. We do not want to see it. I do not need to step inside the world of Law & Order SVU and see Detective Mariska Hargitay wearing a mask. Because they only wear masks for about five seconds and then they take them off anyways and they are not social distancing. I don't think so, honey. The detectives on SVU

not standing six feet apart while they're at work doing their jobs. I also don't think so, honey. Commercials getting in on the COVID guidelines of it all. I can't, I don't think so, honey. RuPaul telling me that he can pick up, I can pick up my old Navy curbside. I can't, I don't think so, honey. RuPaul telling me that he can pick up, I can pick up my

Old Navy curbside. I don't want to be reminded that I have to pick up my Old Navy curbside by RuPaul himself. I don't think so, honey. I don't think so, honey. Commercials telling me that they care about me and my family when they clearly do not and they're just trying to sell me goods and wares.

I don't think so, honey. I do not want to be reminded of COVID. I can suspend my disbelief. And that's one minute. I agree. I couldn't agree more. Hey there, it's a holiday. Hey sis. Hey sis.

Hey sis. It's Christmas. It's the worst. But yes, hey there, it's a holiday is the energy. Hello friend, it is Christmas. Yes. And I have to say this. I watch Mariska Hargitay to escape.

Yeah. You know what I mean? I watch Mariska Hargitay to be taken away to another world, you know? To be transported. Yeah, to be transported to another time and place.

A Disney-like experience of watching Law & Order. That's what I want when I watch My Queen. That's what I want. That's what I want. That's beautiful. Thank you, Joel. I would say, order that's what i want when i watch my queen that's what i want that's what i want that's beautiful thank you joel i would say and that's really a read on gray's anatomy which is not not done well in this episode of lost culture is this gray's anatomy did not do well today i hope they recover yeah me too hope ellen pompeo is okay with this. Take. All right. And so this is the fucking moment where we say to meet your Johari that it is the troll bowl.

I don't think so, honey. Are you ready? Okay. Your troll bowl topic is cowboys. And your time starts now. I don't think so, honey. Cowboys. First of all, ew.

You look like you fucking stink, ugly ass. Also, you all probably have, you are not taking care of your skin. You look old as fuck. It's sad, disgusting. I don't think so, honey. Cowboys. Riding horse? Disgusting. Sad. Those guys stink too. So you can smell the screen from a thousand miles away.

I don't think so, honey. Cowboy. Exclude women, okay? How about cowgirl? Ever heard of it? I don't think so, honey. Cowboy. Exclude women, okay? How about cowgirl? Ever heard of it? I don't think so, honey. Cowboys. 30 seconds. Have you had neck problems much? Ew, sad, disgusting. I don't think so, honey. That hat smells.

Ew. I don't think so, honey. Like little shoes with like the knives on them or whatever. The little spinny knives. Those guys. 15 seconds. I don't think so, honey. Whatever your drawl is, sad. I'm not interested. Like little shoes with like the knives on them or whatever. The little spinny knives. Those guys. 15 seconds. Those guys. I don't think so, honey. Whatever your drawl is.

Sad. I'm not interested. If you're going to have an accent, make it British. Five seconds. I don't think so, honey. Cowboy. You guys are old. I don't think so, honey.

Cowboy. And then one minute, dragged to filth literally by their own horse and Mitra drag them wow I miss the feeling of completely blacking out and saying the dumbest things I've ever said in my life

oh my god dragged out of here by their boots tossed out of town what are those called Spurs Spurs Spurs okay They wear boots. With knives. Out of town. What are those called? Spurs. Spurs. Spurs.

Okay. If anyone was going to know the meaning of Spurs, it was going to be Joel. It was going to be Joel. It was always Joel. It was always going to be you. Spurs. I feel like you'd rock some Spurs. Yeah.

Yeah. I'll give you some for Christmas. In sort of like Western gear joel actually joel i already got you a christmas gift oh wow mitra uh i'm gonna order you an etsy christmas gift that's inspired by joel wow because now actually i've you ever do this you ever find like a good like little like novelty gift idea and it's it, now it's going to be your thing? Matt, literally, yes, you got one of mine. What was it?

I need a wine that's as big as my ass. Yeah. It's one of my favorite cups. It actually is more of a display piece. It is a display piece because the glitter, the sticky glitter on the outside can't endure being washed. It also has like fused to my countertop.

So it's now just like part of it. And I love it. I'm like, I need a drink the size of my ass. I need a drink the size of my ass. And I was like, did you craft make these? But you could have.

And that there's a power in that too yeah that i have the vibe of uh glitter bespoke wine yes i was like there was no doubt in my mind that you stone these tights listen i also we forgot to say congrats to both on the release of big mouth oh oh my god A great week. It's only the funniest show on television. Truly brilliant. Truly genius. And such inspired casting.

Honestly. Tandy? Inspired casting. Indeed. Tandy Newton. Josie? Josie Doda is the moment. She is so good.

Oh, she's absolutely killing saved by the bell too we've said it before we'll say it again jane krakowski and 30 rock vibes whoa uh oh yeah i said it i haven't watched yet you must it's really good it's really very funny i'm excited to watch so everyone out there all the readers have homework and here's the thing readers um there's a twist because you're gonna hear from us tomorrow check your inboxes or wherever you get your podcast because the last cult races have a little bit of a christmas gift for you should we announce the cadence of the gift right now or no no no oh okay that's the mystery that's the mystery but tomorrow we're dropping in a fun

little episode and then follow the crumbs from there. Follow the crumbs from there. Like Santa would, you know how Santa follows the crumbs from house to house. That's sort of how he, that's canonically how he does his thing. We all know the story of Christmas. We all know.

Listen to the episode tomorrow. Listen to urgent care. Watch big mouth on 1.5 speed on your supported devices i don't know please watch it at normal speed please watch it yeah i know you're right the way god intended um joel and mitra any sort of uh words to the readers as they head into the holidays because there's a big holidays coming up and i i think that they would love to hear sort of um what you had to say jesus is king. Mm-hmm. Okay. If I had to give anyone some advice this holiday season, I would say stop drinking water.

It's not good for you. Call your family, but only if they have already sent your gift. And watch Three Busy Debras. Watch Three Busy Debras. If they have already sent your gift and, um, watch three busy Deborah. Watch three busy Deborah. And, um, that is the point where, um,

we sort of segue into the song. Okay. All I want for Christmas is you. All the lights are shining bright everywhere. That's an odd place to stop, but that's where we're going to stop. And if you want to hear the rest of that, listen to Mariah Carey. Wow. Bye. Bye.

I'm Julian Edelman. I'm Rob Gronkowski. And we are super excited to tell you about our new show, Dudes on Dudes. We're spilling all the behind-the-scenes stories, crazy details, and honestly, just having a blast talking football. Every week, we're discussing our favorite players of all times, from legends to our buddies to current stars. We're finally answering the age-old question, what kind of dudes are these dudes?

We're gonna find out, Jules. New episodes drop every Thursday during the NFL season. Listen to Dudes on Dudes on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm NK, and this is Basket Case. What is wrong with me? A show about the ways that mental illness is shaped by not just biology, swaps of different meds, but by culture and society.

By looking closely at the conditions that cause mental distress, I find out why so many of us are struggling to feel sane, what we can do about it, and why we should care. Oh, look at you giving me therapy, girl. Listen to Basket Case every Tuesday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

I'm Joe Gatto. I'm Steve Byrne. Together we do the Two Cool Moms podcast, which is a podcast where we help dispense advice to our loyal listeners. Everybody has an issue. Everybody has something that they need help with. Right. And that's where we come in.

Because our moms were cool moms. We like to think that we have inherited their maternal advice. And we try to just do some good. Besides being comedians, we love to help. Guys, bring us your queries. They could be personal questions. They could be serious. They could be lighthearted.

Yeah. But know this. We are here for you. Yeah. You can find us wherever you listen to your podcasts or on the iHeartRadio app. Oh hey, it's Teresa, back from the dead, again. Just wanted to pop in and let you know that Haunting is back on October 22nd. Spooky season? I own spooky season.

We're serving up some killer stories, literally, and a few that might make you question whether you really locked the door before getting into bed. So cancel your lame Halloween plans. Haunted houses? Overdone. Candy corn? Honestly, who eats that? Your new tradition? Listening to me. Listen to Haunting starting on October 22nd on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.