Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang - "I Don't Think So, Honey! 2" LIVE (Part Two)

Episode Date: September 8, 2017

Las Culturistas "I Don't Think So, Honey" returns for its SECOND LIVE SHOW! 50 of New York's best comedians take one minute each to go off on culture. PART TWO featuring: Pat Regan, Annie Donley, Tyler Coates, Adam Goldman, Joel Perez, Greg Kozatek, Ben Rimalower, Danny Visconti, Bobby Hankinson, Brantley Brice, Gabe Gonazalez, Shane O'Neill, Rachel Pegram, Henry Russell Bergstein, Daniel Lempert, Ziwe Fumudoh, Tessa Skara, Rae Sanni, Joe Castle Baker, Lena Einbinder, Shalewa Sharpe, Morgan Miller, Timothy Dunn, Sarah Grace Welbourn, Abra Tabak, and Josh Sharp. Hosted by Matt Rogers & Bowen Yang. Recorded 8/11/17 at Littlefield in Brooklyn, NY.Sponsored by #Spoke -- the new, free podcast app from SiriusXM that makes it easier than ever to find podcasts you love. Check it out at hearspoke.com! SUBSCRIBE // RATE // REVIEW #LasCulturistas on #ApplePodcasts, #GooglePlay, #Stitcher and #Soundcloud! New Episodes of #LasCulturistas every Wednesday! Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Real Housewives of New York City are back for another bite of the Big Apple. Look who it is. Joined by elite new friends. Rebecca Minkoff. Have you ever heard of her? But things could change in a New York Minute. She had this wild night and ended up getting pregnant by some other guy. What?

You told her? Not today, Satan. Not today. The Real Housewives of New York City. All new Tuesdays at 9 on Bravo. Or stream it on City TV+. I'm Julian Edelman. I'm Rob Gronkowski.

And we are super excited to tell you about our new show, Dudes on Dudes. We're spilling all the behind-the-scenes stories, crazy details, and honestly, just having a blast talking football. Every week, we're discussing our favorite players of all times, from legends to our buddies to current stars. We're finally answering the age-old question, what kind of dudes

are these dudes? We're gonna find out, Jules. New episodes drop every Thursday during the NFL season. Listen to Dudes on Dudes on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Sheryl Swoops. And I'm Tarika Foster-Brasby.

And on our new podcast, we're talking about the real obstacles women face day to day. Because no matter who you are, there are levels to what we experience as women. And T and I have no problem going there. Listen to Levels to This with Cheryl Swoops and Tarika Foster-Brasby, an iHeart Women's Sports production in partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment. You can find us on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Presented by Capital One, founding partner of iHeart Women's Sports. On Thanksgiving Day, 1999, five-year-old Cuban boy Elian Gonzalez was found off the coast of Florida. And the question was, should the boy go back to his father in Cuba? Mr. Gonzalez wanted to go home, and he wanted to take his son with him. Or stay with his relatives in Miami? Imagine that your mother died trying to get you to freedom. Listen to Chess Peace, the Elian Gonzalez story on the

iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Las Culturistas is brought to you by the Forever Dog Podcast Network Find us and other great podcasts at www.foreverdogpodcasts.com And if you're loving what you're hearing, subscribe to us at Apple Podcasts And while you're there, please write us a nice review and give us a 5-star rating Thank you all!

Thank you all. Thank you all. Wow. Gather. Gather. Gather. We're in session. Calling this to order. All right. We are calling this to order. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.. We're in session. Calling this to order. All right, we are calling this back into order. Is everyone excited for some more show?

I mean, the lucky thing for us is we now have Skittles on the table. We asked for one goddamn thing, and now we got our Skittles on the table. Okay, so, guys, what did we think of that first half? one goddamn thing and now we got our Skittles on the table. Just kidding, that was not. Guys, what did we think of that first half? Come on. Who fucks with Despacito now? Who already fucked with Despacito? Did not fuck with Despacito until Michelle took me to church.

I don't think I've heard it in full. Oh, it's good. Is it good? Yeah. It's good? We like Despacito? Okay. Front row says yes.

I'm down for it. To start this next half off, we have invited a special guest that's going to be coming to the stage right now. Now, this person is last I Don't Think So Honey lives. Las Culturistas Icon Award winner. And he's about to take the stage and truly show us what an icon is and what a Las Culturista is. He is a Las Culturista in

heart and in our minds. And he's coming to the stage right now and his name is Pat Regan. Pat. Pat. Pat Pat Guys Pat is here And he's gonna do it I don't think so honey

Now Pat Do you have a pre-selected topic right now Or would you like to go into the bowl First of all I just want to say In my girl It's the icon award Awards are so silly

And I'm so embarrassed I'm gonna go with I just found out I'm doing this I'm gonna embarrassed. I'm going to go with... I just found out I'm doing this. I'm going to go with a pre-selected. A pre-selected. He's going to go with a pre-selected topic. This is Pat Regan's I Don't Think So Honey, an Icon Award winner.

His I Don't Think So Honey time starts now. Awards are so silly. I Don't Think So Honey, these young girls. These young girls today coming up. I went on a date recently with a 19-year-old NYU grad boy. He was telling me about the amazing year he had. I wasn't having a great year.

He said, and then he was talking about how much he booked and I was like, congrats, that's huge. And then his phone buzzed on the table. He interrupted himself and said, just booked something. These young girls! These young girls!

All over gay Instagram. These young girls on my gay Instagram feed. Photos you might like. More like, you want to come right now. These young girls on my Instagram.

Get off my Instagram. Five seconds. Keep going. I invented being 23. That's one minute. I don't think so, honey. I was the first 23-year-old and I will be

the last 23-year-old bitch. I don't think so, honey. I was the first 23-year-old, and I will be the last 23-year-old bitch. I don't think so, honey. These young girls. Go home. Go home. Your moms and your dads. Thank you. And that's why.

That's an Icon award winner right there. I don't think so, honey. These young girls. Referring to young gay men. These young girls coming up. That's so funny. Unbelievable. Shall we resume the regular part of the show?

Thank you. Here we go. Our next group is called Sand Prawns. The Sand Prawns. Prawns you would find in the sand. Give it up for Annie Donnelly. Yes! Yes!

Yes! Oh, my God. The hat. Oh, my God. Stop everything. This is a treat to me. Look at how aloof she is. She doesn't care.

She doesn't give a fuck about being here. Okay, let's keep going. Give it up for Tyler Coates. Tyler! Give it up for Adam Goldman. Adam. Cardigan. Yes! Give it up for Joelle Perez And a cardigan. Yes. Give it up for Joelle Perez.

This is a hunk alert. Look at that stash. Oh my god. And Greg Kozatek. Greg Kozatek. Oh my god. Annie, you're surrounded. This is a good looking group. Annie, you are drowning in this hunk. This is so good to me.

This is a treat to her. I love the theater. I love the theater. And she's going to love taking the mic. Annie Donnelly, take the mic. Annie, yes. Okay, hop on. Chocolate cake. Annie, is it going to be pre-selected or from the bowl?

Pre-selected. Annie Donnelly's I Don't Think So, Honey. Time starts now. I don't think so, honey. Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang. I don't think so, honey. Why do you think that you get to tell us about culture? What, honey?

I don't think so honey. You act like you're the only two gay peoples in the whole world. There are so many other gay people. Ellen DeGeneres. 30 seconds. Kelly Clarkson. I don't think so honey.

I don't think so honey. Matt I don't think so, honey. Matt Rogers. Matt, can I hang out with you? Can we be friends? Yeah, let's hang out. Because everybody who hangs out with you gets famous, except for you. Oh, I don't think so, honey.

I don't think so, honey. Bowen Yang. Honey. Sponsored by Spoke. No, honey. Sponsored by Warby Parker, honey. Said by Warby. Honey, if you want to get fucked, 1-800-CONTACTS, honey.

1-800-CONTACTS, honey. I've had it with this show. I have had it. Oh, my God. I don't think so, honey. If you want to put my voice on your podcast, you better sign me a waiver, honey, because I haven't seen none backstage except a cheap beer.

I have had it. Oh, that's one. That's one, miss. Officially, I have had it. She's had it officially. She read us. I am not famous, and Bowen has glasses. And I don't get fucked.

We have been read. That was, I'm sorry, that was a record. That clocked in at a record one minute and 27 seconds. And we said nothing. Said nothing. We let it go. We were too shell-shocked. Unbelievable.

Oh, my God. Annie Donnelly. Annie Donnelly, treat you us! Treat you us, but please welcome to the stage another treat, Tyler Coates! Tyler Coates, here we go, bitch! Oh my god. Okay, so Tyler. I'm gonna be really nice to you. Be really nice.

By not being mean to you. That's a technicality. Alright, here we go. So, Tyler, are we a technicality. Yeah. All right. Here we go. So, Tyler, are we doing pre-selected? Are we doing the bowl? We're doing pre-selected. Okay. I get that.

I get that. Here we go. And your time starts right now. I don't think so, honey. Everyone who tells me I look like Jesse Tyler Ferguson. Oh! The last seven fucking years of my life have been a nightmare. Because none of you are the first person to tell me I fucking know because I see my face every day.

I can't go on a Southwest flight and be in the fucking B group without someone being like, are you a fucking millionaire? No, I'm on a fucking megabus in the sky. And I'm waiting behind 40 people. I can't go to a fucking Apple store and buy an overpriced computer without a genius coming up to me and being like, I want to shake your hand. I'm such a fan. Of what? My amazing cultural

criticism online? My Twitter presence? My underrated web series Disappointing Gay Bust Friends from 2011? Plug it! plug it. No. It's because he thinks I look like a five-time Emmy loser, Jesse Tyler Ferguson. One minute. Five-time Emmy loser, Jesse Tyler Ferguson.

Wow. Red to filth here tonight. Tyler Coates, unbelievable. Oh, my God. Oh my god. Here we go. Moving forward, we have Adam Goldman. Cardigan queen. What do you think, Adam?

I think I'm going to do a pre-selected topic. Here we go. I don't think so, honey, everything. You wake up in the morning, you go to get on the subway. I don't know if you've noticed the subway is a literal state of emergency right now. It always feels like some shitty, gritty nightmare flashback from a Lester Steven Spielberg movie about the future. I don't think so, honey. The subway system.

You get up, you go to work, you're listening to a podcast on your way to work. It's all Blue Apron ads now. You guys are good, though. I don't think so, honey, Blue Apron. You go to work. Do's all blue apron ads now. Oh! You guys are good, though. I don't think so, honey. Blue apron. You go to work. Do you know what an office is? It's a big, hot room

where people who don't like each other fart quietly for eight hours a day. Non-stop. Pull out your phone. You find out Donald Trump accidentally blew up the moon. Can't look at that. Go on your lunch break.

Where do you go? Where do you go? You go to Chipotle, queen. I don't think so, honey. You live in New York. Chipotle is dog food and guacamole is extra. 50 seconds. I don't think so, honey.

What are you, a top? You go home on the hell train. You make your blue apron because a podcast told you to. You curl up in the fetal position in front of Westworld until 11.30 p.m. when you can take your melatonin, which, by the way, is a placebo. I don't think so, honey. I'm a flameli! p.m. when you can take your melatonin, which, by the way, is a placebo. I don't think so, honey. Ah! Ah! Melatonin is a placebo.

It's a joke. Okay. Thoughts? Thoughts? Here we go. Wow, he's got thoughts. This is a great time to mention that we have two raffles going on tonight. This is true. A second raffle

is through Spoke. If you download the app, you can enter to win a $250 gift certificate to Chipotle. And people who are still afraid of Chipotle, who still stigmatize it, I don't think so, honey. It's been well documented.

I have one that's on the pod. Just listen to it. It's regulated. Thank you, Adam. Here we go. That was unbelievable. And next, coming to the mic, we have Joelle Perez. Yes, Joelle. Hi, Joelle.

Hello. Here we go. Hello, he says. What's it going to be? I have something preselected. Okay, I love that. And Joelle, your time starts right now. I don't think so, honey, seltzer water.

Oh! Yeah. It's just water with bubbles, okay? I say, fuck you, LaCroix. Fuck you, vintage. Fuck you. You know, because actually growing up, growing up, whenever people got seltzer water

was because they were rich. So actually, I think got seltzer water is because they were rich. So actually, I think that seltzer water is classist. Oh! Thank you. You know, so I'm just going to go out and say that. I'm just going to say that. Yes, say it. Maybe it's classist.

30 seconds. But here's a really big admission I have to make, okay? I'm Puerto Rican, and we are not a seltzer-loving people, okay? However, something happened. I turned 30 years old, and all of a sudden, I had this unquenchable thirst for seltzer water. 15 seconds. I blame that on gentrification. That is the gentrification of my taste buds. It's the gentrification of my taste buds.

I'm going to say it. I don't want to make it all about gentrification, but sometimes it happens. So, fuck you, Seltzer Water. I love you, but I hate you as well. Thank you. Oh, that's one minute. Gentrification. Moving into our taste buds.

Unbelievable, Joelle. And next up, we have Greg Kozatek. Yes, Greg. Come on, baby. Yes, Greg. Greg is the hero of the night. Greg swooped in and is saving the day. Greg, what's it going to be? Predetermined or preselected?

Preselected. That's what I meant. I'm sorry. Here we go. Your time starts now. I don't think so, honey. Designing with Christmas lights. Okay, bitch. If it's on Pinterest, it's automatically a no. Alright, bitch? Okay? I don't want to see no fucking barn-ass wedding

drenched in Christmas lights. From head to toe, I want to see the wagon wheels, I want to see the rafters, and I want to see the straw. Don't try to hide it, bitch. Okay? The first, the fastest way

that you can tell someone has no perspective is if they put Christmas lights on it, you put it in your dorm room, you're done. We're done, okay? 30 seconds! We're done. When you see Christmas lights in it. You put it in your dorm room. You're done. We're done. We're done.

When you see Christmas lights in a fucking TV show, you know that production designer had no idea what they were doing. I see you, Emmy-dominated transparent. Fucking Christmas lights up the wazoo, right? Every scene, actor, Christmas lights in the background, tears. I know what you're doing. You're emotionally manipulative. Five seconds scene. Actor, Christmas lights in the background, tears. I know what you're doing. You're emotionally manipulative. Five seconds.

Fuck you, Christmas lights. I don't think so, honey. And that's one minute. Greg Cosatek, give it up for sand prawns. My apartment has Christmas lights and a sand lamp. Okay. A salt lamp. Salt lamp.

Give it up for Andy Dodley, Tyler Coates, Adam Goldman, Joelle Perez, Greg Krasatak. Greg Krasatak, unbelievable. Wow. The sand prawns really started us off strong there. Here we go. But now it's time for this group, which is called Five Gays. Welcome Ben Rimmelauer.

Welcome Danny Visconti. Welcome Bobby Hankinson. Welcome Brantley Bryce. Come on, baby. And welcome Gabe Gonzalez. Gabe Gonzalez. Five gays. Five gays.

Wow, okay, five gays up on stage. Here we go. And the first gay Ben Rimmelauer Come on bitch Hi Oh Wait we have to read it Here give me that

Give me the one This is the one You still want that one Okay this is the one Alright good Cause stand at the mic You must be surprised When I say it

I wanna see the shock Register on your face When I say Put the hat on. The audience is craving it. I did my hair. Yeah, but you know what? It's okay. Yes! Ben. Yeah.

Your I don't think so honey topic is the war. Oh, I don't think so honey. The war? I'm sorry. I have had enough wars in my lifetime, okay? My great grandparents had World War I, my grandparents had World War II, my parents sort of had Vietnam, but they were like Jewish and in college and stuff. And I am not ready to deal with the war.

I remember with Iraq, the first time with the, listening to the headphones in school, you know, and you could see the stuff, things, bombs going off, you know, and it was great. It happened, but that's in the past. And I don't even fuck Korea and Guam. What's the problem? First of all, there already was a Korean War. I don't know

if you guys know that. Yes. And a lot of Korean people were like refugees and came here and so like we're all good with Korea now, okay? I go to this Korean barbecue, Dokei B in Williamsburg. It is fantastic. You cook your own food. There's no

tension whatsoever. Our cultures are just enjoying it together. I don't think so! Yes, that's one minute! Ben, mwah. As far as we know in the restaurants, things are chill. Things are chill. Things are chill. Things are supposed to be chill.

Guys, give it up for Danny Visconti. Here, come on, Danny. Here we go. Here we go, Danny. All right, yes, exactly like that. You look amazing. I have to use my notes. So this is pre-selected.

So it's pre-selected, I assume. Danny Visconti's I Don't Think So Honey time starts now. I Don't Think So Honey, people who post on Facebook that they just got some really exciting news that they can't wait to share. Bitch, no you didn't. That is as if I came here tonight and said I have a really important I Don't Think So Honey

that I can't wait to share later. Also, I think if your exciting news is that you're participating in a 29-hour reading of a scaled-down version of Seussical, you need to review the definitions of exciting and news, bitch. I don't think so, honey. Listen, if you were doing anything exciting in the theater world, I would hear about it not through a series of cryptic tweets or cryptic posts on Facebook,

but from Frank D'Alella's goddamn mouth to New York One and God's goddamn ears. Honey, I don't think so, honey. Oh, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. Also, I'm going to lump in people who are excited to finally announce something. Bitch, why is it so important for you to know that I was waiting for it?

Honestly, honestly, your 54 Below show is not a government secret. I don't think so, honey. Not one minute. Your 54 Below show is not a government secret. That's real. That is real. Everyone welcome Bobby Hankinson.

Come on up, motherfucker. Motherfucker. Look at this culture, Easter. It fits like a glove. Yes, that looks amazing. It's good with the shirt. Thank you. Podcasts are a visual medium.

Thank you. All right, so what do you think? I am doing pre-selected. Okay, pre-selected. And your time starts now. I don't think so. I'm going to Rita Ora, okay? Half the people here don't even know who you are,

and that is why I have so many questions. Okay. First of all, are you an actress? You had four lines in the 50 Shades movies. Okay. And not being the worst part of that series does not get you a spot at the Met Ball. Thank you. Okay.

You want to try to step into Tyra Banks heels? Are you kidding me? On a season of Top Model that didn't even have a plus size model representing for the fiercely real girls out there? Oh, 30 seconds. Fiercely real. You want to defile the specter of Tyra Male with a Rita Alert that you are filming

on your front facing camera because they will not give you a tripod, bitch. Okay? And now you're hosting boy band? You're not a boy. You've never been in a band what are you doing your biggest musical accomplishment is making an Iggy Azalea song

worse okay thank you you are a black widow cause like a spider you're hiding in every corner and nobody wants you here thank you Rita Ora

that's one minute Rita Ora. You made an Iggy Azalea song worse. That was one of those. We wanted to hear it, and we needed to hear it. We didn't know we wanted it, but we wanted it. Rita Ora, it's cathartic. Here we go, guys. Brantley Bryce.

Brantley Bryce, let's go! Give it up, bitch! Give it up for Brantley. Are we wearing this hat or what? Oh, no. Put that hat on for sure! Yes, Peter Pan! Like this, I think. Because we have the hair in the front.

That's it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Handsome. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, we love! It's great. What do we think? Alright, guys. Are we doing pre-selected or the bowl? Pre-select. Pre-selected. Brantley Bryce, I don't think so honey. Time starts now.

Guys that wear boxer shorts for underwear. It's 2017. Everybody's doing anal and eating ass, so I feel like everyone should dress the part. Do you know what I mean? As a gay man, the fact that I can wear a jockstrap, a thong,

a bikini briefs, I have all these options to not feel judged. I just think that straight dudes should get on board. That's where I'm at. That's the thing. I knew for me when I saw Josh Hartnett do a photo shoot. 30 seconds. He was wearing briefs and I was like,

he's hot. I was like, sure, I'm going to take after that for sure and I was like, he's hot. And I was like, sure, I'm going to take after that for sure. And I've not looked back ever since. I actually placed, I placed an order of thong underwear

from Chile. 15 seconds. Oh my God. Just so you guys know. What is happening? All right. Five seconds. I stand by my word.

Unbelievable. That's one minute Again Podcasts are a visual medium We wish they were Yes wear it There you go Here we go Get the photo

Where's Mindy? Oh great I would throw these Into the crowd But it's my only clothes That's okay Brantley Bryce everybody Brantley Bryce

Setting an example For us all All you straight men I want you to look at that I want you to take note Take note Get out your little moleskins Get out your moleskins

Get out your moleskins Alright and That's the new catchphrase Get out your moleskins New catch The Real Housewives of New York City Are back for another bite Of the Big Apple.

Look who it is. Joined by elite new friends. Rebecca Minkoff. Have you ever heard of her? But things could change in a New York Minute. She had this wild night and ended up getting pregnant by some other guy. What? You told her?

Not today, Satan. Not today. The Real Housewives of New York City. All new Tuesdays at 9 on Bravo or stream it on City TV+. I'm Julian Edelman. I'm Rob Gronkowski. Guess what, folks? We're teammates again. And we're going to welcome you guys all to Dudes on Dudes.

I'm a dude, you're a dude, and Dudes on Dudes is our brand new show. We're going to highlight players, peers, guys that we played against, legends from the past, and we're just going to sit here and talk about them. And we'll get into the types of dudes. What kind of types of dudes are there, Gronk? We got studs, wizards. We got freaks. Or dudes, dude.

We got dogs. Dogs. We'll break down their games. We'll share some insider stories and determine what kind of dude each of these dudes are. Is Randy Moss a stud or a freak? Is Tom Brady a dog or a dude's dude? We're going to find out, Jules. New episodes drop every Thursday during the NFL season.

Listen to Dudes on Dudes on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Cheryl Swoops, WNBA champ, three-time Olympian, and Basketball Hall of Famer. I'm a mom, and I'm a woman. I'm Tarika Foster-Brasby, journalist, sports reporter, basketball analyst, a wife, and I'm also a woman. And on our new podcast, we're talking about

the real obstacles women face day to day. See, athlete or not, we all know it takes a lot as women to be at the top of our game. We want to share those stories about balancing work and relationships, motherhood, career shifts, you know, just all the we go through. Because no matter who you are, there are levels to what we experience as women. And T and I, well, we have no problem going there. Listen to Levels to This with Cheryl Swoops and Tarika Foster-Brasby, an iHeart Women's Sports production in partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment. You can find us on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Presented by Elf Beauty, founding partner of iHeart Women's Sports. Hey, I'm Jay Shetty, and I'm the host of On Purpose. My latest episode is with Jelly Roll. This episode is one of the most honest and raw interviews I've ever had. We go deep into Jelly Roll's life story from being in and out of prison from the age of 13 to being one of today's biggest artists.

We talk about guilt, shame, body image, and huge life transformations. I was a desperate delusional dreamer and the desperate part got me in a lot of trouble. I encourage delusional dreamers. Be a delusional dreamer. Just don't be a desperate delusional dreamer. I just had such an anger. I was just so mad at life. Everything that wasn't right was everybody's fault but mine. I had such a victim mentality. I took zero accountability for anything in my life. I was the kid that if you asked what happened, I immediately started with everything but me. It took years for me to break that, like years of work.

Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Trust me, you won't want to miss this one. It's time. It's time. For Gabe Gonzalez. Hey, baby.

Such flair, such aplomb. Yes, switch the hat, clap the hat, the new look. This is huge. Yes, huge. Model it. There we go. We got it. Oh, Gabe.

Gabe, what's it going to be? I'm feeling it. I'm feeling the hat. What do you think? I want to do the troll ball. It's been neglected. Yeah, backstage, someone tried to talk me into doing the two of you,

and I almost did it. Wow, it's like we've already been read. Okay, Gabe. Your I don't think so, honey topic is baseball. I don't think so, honey, baseball. Your time starts now. I don't think so, honey, baseball. Because while I was growing up,

my gay ass was forced to watch baseball games by every single one of my fucking Puerto Rican uncles. Yo pienso que no, honey. I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't think so, honey, because while I'm sitting down watching baseball with my uncles,

I'm getting a hard-on from watching men's bulges visibly emerging. True. From what look like jeggings. Why is everyone playing baseball wearing jeggings? 30 seconds.

Not only are they jeggings, they're like capri lengths. Why do they go to the middle of your calf? Why is your sock that high? You look like every 15-year-old boy. What the fuck? And it makes me uncomfortable. 15 seconds.

I don't think so, honey. Baseball, because I was forced to play and I was so bad, the coach suggested I get glasses and I did need glasses and then I put them on and my gay ass was still bad at baseball.

I don't think so honey, baseball. I'm in it. I don't think so honey, baseball. Give it up for five gays. Give it up for these five gays. Ben Rimmelauer, Danny Visconti, Bobby Hankinson,

Brantley Bryce, and Gabe Gonzalez. Wow, wow, wow. Those five gays really brought it to the hilt. I couldn't find my words there at all. Me and this girl are like, yeah, we know. Sometimes we can't find our words. Me and this girl are right there. Let me tell you. Okay, guys.

It's time for the next group. These are the garden wolves. The garden wolves. We know how wolves are in the garden sometimes. Wolves are in the garden. You know when you go in your garden, you have to really look around because you don't know about the wolves? You know right there. Lauren, yes. Give it up for Shane around because you don't know about the wolves? You know right there.

Lauren, yes. Okay. Give it up for Shane O'Neal. Shane O'Neal, this garden wolf. Look who it is. Spooky. Rachel Pegram. Superstar.

Superstar. Henry Russell Bergstein. Yes, bitch. Barbara. Model the shirt. Model the shirt. Model the shirt. Barbara. shirt. Model the shirt. Barbara!

Of course, we have Daniel Lempert. Daniel Lempert. And Ziwe Fumuto. Come on, Ziwe. Yes! Wow. Look at this go. Oh, my God, this group.

Ziwe, your sandals. Yes! Your socks. Oh, yes. Okay, all right. You know what? We're going to get to those later, but please welcome to the mic Shane O'Neal. Yes, Shane. Yes, Shane.

Shane. Shane. Hi, guys. How's it going? It's going so good, Shane. We're having a really fun time. Really? What are you going to do?

Are you going to do the bowl or are you going to do a pre-sliced traffic? I got something to get off my chest. Okay, get it off. This is Shane O'Neal's I don't think so. He's got something. His time starts now. I don't think so, honey. Guys on gay sex apps that say, don't send me dick pics in

their profile. What the fuck are you doing on a gay sex app? And by the way, that is a gay sex app. There's no such thing as a gay dating app. There's either meeting each other or getting online and fucking. Do you remember being in seventh grade? Do you remember looking around your language arts class

and being like, if only I knew what every single person in this room's dick looked like? Yes! We live in that glorious future, but you have to participate, ladies and gentlemen.

Why are you logging onto a sex app to meet guys who don't want to fuck you? You want to meet guys who don't want to fuck you? Hang out with me for a day. I meet them all day long and I'll introduce you

to all of them. Then you can make some friends. I won't be your friends. Maybe they will. Oh, you're on there to network? Well, if you're this bad at being gay, how do I know that you're good

at doing anything? If you don't want to see dick pics, get on Tinder and say you're interested in women. They won't send you dick pics. The women will be grateful that you're not sending dick pics, okay? But it's 2017.

We live in a glorious future. Log on, upload, unlock, and get the fuck over yourself. That's one minute. More dicks online. We need more dicks online. The stigma has to be removed. Heard it here. Free the dick, guys. please welcome Rachel B. Graham.

Come on, Rachel. Yes. Oh, my God. Unbelievable, the outfit. Yes. Gorgeous. Gorgeous. Now.

I don't think this will fit on my head. Don't worry about it. Throw it on the goddamn ground. If it falls off, it's up in the air. The Pied Piper. Is it going to be preselected or from the bowl? Wow. You know, up until this moment, I was going to do pre-select, but I'm feeling crazy.

Oh, wow. You see what's in her eyes? She's feeling crazy. Yes. And you're feeling crazy. I'm going to give you something crazy. Okay. Yes. Oh, God.

Oh, my God. Okay. here we go I don't think so honey both Michelle Williams's wow and your time starts now

wow I don't think so honey Michelle Williams I don't know the second one I don't know which one I'm thinking of even at this moment is it the one

that was in education uneducation I don't it the one that was in Education? Uneducation? I don't even know that that was on Michelle. Wow. Who was that? I don't know. Carrie Mulligan. Did she win something? Michelle is a basic name. We all know Beyonce, huh?

We at least know Kelly. 30 seconds. We all know Beyonce, huh? Huh? We at least know Kelly. 30 seconds. Who is the third? Who is the fourth? You don't even know. You don't even know the fourth of Destiny's Child. I don't think so, honey.

Michelle Williams. I don't think so, Michelle. 15 seconds. Michelle, is it one L? Is it two? I got a sister-in-law with a Michelle. She's got a two L. I don't like it, honey.

I don't like it. Five seconds. There's no reason for a double L. That's ridiculous. It's redundant. You know the L sound is ugh. You know how it sounds. That's what it is.

Who knew? I don't think someone even named Michelle. Unbelievable. I think Michelle with one L is Michele. Michele. Yeah, that's it. Like the Italian Michele, like Michael. Like the Italian. Yeah, it's like, you know, the Italian Michael.

Yep. Please welcome. I think. Yeah. What do you think? That's what I think. Mich think? You know what I think? The next person up is... Henry Russell Bergstein!

Henry Russell Bergstein! I had a friend named McKaylee when I was in middle school and he was Italian and he spelled it with one L. Henry, what do we think, babe? Well, I just want to say that it's okay that I wasn't in the five gays group. I do want to say that older bodies

can be sexualized bodies. Now, now, now. It's not my I don't think so, but after 23, there is a whole life to live. Oh, yes, bitch. Thank you. But I'm going to do preselecting. Okay. Henry Russell Bergstein's I Don't Think So Honey

Time starts now I don't think so honey People who upload sex videos to Xtube Without sound I have had a long day And I wanna relax If I wanted to watch porn without sound I'd do it at work

You think your silent porn Is somehow better Relax, if I wanted to watch porn without sound, I'd do it at work. You think your silent porn is somehow better? I don't think so, honey. You are not Norma Desmond. I grew up in a poor household in the 80s without a VCR. I know what it's like to jerk off to a magazine, and honey, I don't think so. Yeah, no

Good men and women have fought For the right to free speech So let your voice be heard I pay a lot of money And work a lot of hours To afford a New York City apartment So that I can hear and blast loudly Your glory hole amateur porn

Five seconds Let your voice be heard. I don't think so, honey. That's the last one in it. Henry Russell Berg sing. Let your voice be heard. Ooh, sing out. I am excited for this.

Everyone welcome Daniel Lempert to the microphone. Cutie.com. All right, here we go. Dan, are we doing pre-selected or are we doing both? I think I'm going to do pre-selected. This is Daniel Lempert's I Don't Think So, Honey.

Time starts now. I don't think so, honey. People who wear sunglasses on the subway. Listen, bitch, I know you think you're better than People who wear sunglasses on the subway. Listen, bitch, I know you think you're better than the rest of us, but you are not, okay? This is a rush hour cue, bitch. If you were someone of importance, you'd be in a car or a helicopter, okay, bitch? All right, listen, okay?

And the other thing is, it looks like you don't know how sunglasses work or you don't know where you are, and that is concerning, bitch, okay? Listen, this is not Saint-Tropez. You are not at the Oscars like Jack Nicholson, bitch, okay? This was a train that was created in the 1920s, honey, and this is where people come to pee and poo, okay? 30 seconds. There is a baby in our car, and it only knows how to say yes and no.

It is reading everyone to filth, bitch, and you are not excluded, honey. Now, listen, maybe you say I'm trying to hide my identity, and to that I say, bitch, I can still see 80% of your face, honey Okay? 15 seconds Listen, if you really wanted to hide, put a wig on, bitch It's called alias, okay?

Now listen Okay, okay There are a couple reasons why you can wear sunglasses on the train And I will allow for them Your eyes have been fucking dilated by an optometrist And bitch, my thoughts are with you because that can be concerning That's one minute That's the only reason.

I need to hear the other four. There's five reasons, but we only know one. You want to know the other four? Google it, bitch. Google it. Google it, bitch. Guys, please welcome. She's wearing socks and sandals.

Z-Way Fumido. Z-Way Fumido. Yes, comfy. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Check, check, check. Yes, check, check, check Yes, check, check Are we doing the troll bowl?

What do you all think? Troll bowl? Let's do troll bowl Okay, Z-Way, here we go So I'm picking Okay Alright Your I don't think so honey Is on Marcia Gay Harden.

Are you familiar? Are you aware who that is? I don't know what that is. I mean, it seems like people don't know. Do people know who Marcia Gay Harden is? Okay, great. You know what? We're going to do another one

because fuck Marcia Gay Harden! She got silence from you guys, and that's... Okay, this is a good one. Your I don't think so, honey is... Obama's two daughters. Malia and Sasha? Your time starts now!

I don't think so, honey! I need trouble! I'm a black woman! I will do what I want. You want me to disrespect Malia? Sasha, fuck you. Fuck you. Not today.

I believe in Beyonce. I believe in Michelle. I believe in Michelle. I believe in black women. 30 seconds. I don't think so, honey. No way. Stand tall. You want me to live my life?

15 seconds. We shall overcome. We shall overcome sexism. We shall overcome racism. Five seconds. Five seconds. We shall overcome

bullshit. Fuck you. That's one minute. Amazing. Amazing. Amazing. We deserve that. We deserve that. We deserve that.

We should never have put Sasha and Malia in this bowl. What were we thinking? They don't deserve it. Yeah, we deserve it and they don't. Unbelievable. Amazing. Give it up for this group, everybody. Garden Wolves.

Shane O'Neal. Daniel, Shane, Rachel, and Henry unbeatenly. This has been turned around on us several times. In a major way. It's tough. Ding dong! We're Lost Culturistas here to tell you

about a little app called Spoke. That's right. Spoke is a new free podcast app from SiriusXM that's all about making it easier to find podcasts you love. Their curators highlight the most compelling moments from all kinds of shows based on your interests. And if you love a clip, you can tap into the full episode and subscribe to the show all within the app. You can even send clips to your friends and share them on social media. Spoke is creating a vibrant community of podcasters and podcast lovers. Speaking of which, if you have a podcast, you want it on Spoke. Their

team will make sure your show is heard by the people most likely to fall in love with it. You can sign up in two seconds at hearspoke.com slash RSS. That's H-E-A-R-S-P-O-K-E dot com slash RSS So get on it, honey Spoke is in the App Store and the Google Play Store right now Just waiting for you to download it And once you have, be sure to check out the best of I Don't Think So Honey Path for lots, lots more of us And this group is called the Melancholiacs Please welcome Tessa Scara Tessa Scara's in the house And this group is called the Melancholiacs. Oh.

Please welcome Tessa Scara. Tessa Scara's in the house. Ray Sonny, come on out. Yes, Ray. Joe Castle-Baker. Wow. Lena Einbinder. Come on, Lena.

Come on, Lena. Yes. And Shalewa Sharp. Woo! Yes. Here we go, here we go. Here we go. Okay. And the first to the mic, Tessa Scarra. Here we go, Tessa.

Come on, Tessa. Tessa, are you going to do... So what do you think? What do you think? Well, I've prepared one. Okay, great. So... Pre-selected.

So, Tessa, your time starts now. I don't think so, honey, Park Slope kids. Fuck you, kids. I don't have to be nice to you because you're a fucking kid. You're a fucking rich asshole, and I'll tell it to you in your face. Bitch, I used to be a nanny in Park Slope, and I got fired because I swore too much in front of those kids and well you know what it was their fucking fault cause they're

all little shits give me a fucking break and their moms oh my god woman you did not make a sacrifice by leaving your law firm to look after your one fucking kid 30 seconds these bitches they have full time nannies

and they think that they are our motherfucking Teresa. Are you fucking kidding me? I'm Teresa. These kids, they took away my faith in humanity.

One time a kid got hit by a car in front of the place where I was babysitting and I felt nothing. Shit. That kid fucking died.

Five seconds. Five seconds. That kid died and I felt nothing. No. Nothing. That's fucking died. Five seconds. That kid died and I felt nothing. No. That's one minute. Tessa's Gara and now Ray Sonny. Come on, Ray.

Oh my God. Come on, Ray. Ray, what's it going to be? I've never been that mad at anything. Oh, man. Get mad, though. Get mad. Okay.

You guys are going to have to give me some. All right. Here we go. The stroll ball. It's happening. Okay. So I'm picking. I, man. Get mad, though. Get mad. Okay. You guys are going to have to give me some. Here we go. The stroll ball. It's happening. Okay, so I'm picking. I'm picking. Here we go. What's this going to be? Okay. Ooh. This is going to be and I don't think so, honey. Elizabeth Moss.

The star of Mad Men and the Headmaid's Tale. And your time starts now. I don't think so, honey. Oh, you Scientologist ass bitch. What you talking about? Locking bitches up? You can't be no feminist.

And you don't want Tom Cruise to come out the closet because some alien is going to eat your brain? Fuck that shit. That shit's wild. Hey, hey, Elizabeth Mark. Top of the lake is whack. It's boring. Fuck that shit. That shit's wild. Hey, hey, Elizabeth Monk. Top of the lake is whack. It's boring. I'm sorry.

I don't care. I don't care about New Zealand. They've got sheep and I don't like them. I don't know what to tell you. I don't know what to tell you. I don't think so, honey. Look, Peggy bought

a brownstone in Harlem. She is the first gentrifier. Fuck Peggy. 15 seconds. Fuck Peggy. Fuck Elizabeth Moss. Fuck Elizabeth Moss for fucking Fred Armisen. I'm sure he's a really talented guy.

Five seconds. Why? Why? Use your pussy wisely, ladies. That's one minute. Ray Sani, everybody. Rule number 41 of culture. Use your pussy wisely.

Unbelievable. Oh, and he is ready It's Joe Castlebaker Come on Joe Castlebaker Yes Yes Yes Joe

Joe What are you thinking? First of all how are you? I'm so good So good I gotta admit I'm a pre A pre

Okay And if you're pre you're pre This is Joe Castlebaker's pre I don't think so honey Time starts now I don't Don so, honey. Time starts now. I don't, don't, don't, don't, don't think so, honey. Long books. Like, I'm sorry, read my lips.

I can't read. Okay? I can't read. So I'll open a book, flip through a few pages so you see, and then I'm done. Okay? Who's reading long books? You tell me you actually read Infinite Jest?

30 seconds. Don't you have better shit to do? Dear God. Make a fucking movie if you want to write a long book. People will fucking care. you know what I mean or make an Instagram video I'm sure you can consolidate it you know

or fucking tweet I love Twitter I love fortune cookies I love skywriting I love all of that it's so good Joe Castle Baker. Too many books,

not enough fortune cookies. Wow. Okay, it's time for Lena Einbinder. Come on, Lena. Oh, Lena. Hi. I can't wait. Wait, let's just take a look.

Let's take a second to see what's on Lena's waist. Stop. No talk. No touch. Please. Please ignore me. Yes, please ignore. Come on.

That only applies when I'm on the street walking my great Dane and you're a man trying to talk to me. Yes. There you go. You fools. What's it going to be? What are we doing? I was a late addition and the first thing that popped into my vitriolic organ was this.

Okay, your time starts now. I don't think so, honey. People who spray Axe deodorant on the train. When we are inside the train, you are a terrorist. You are a domestic terrorist. That is chemical warfare against me. The doors are closed. Stand clear of the closing doors, please. Everything except for the particulate matter you just jettisoned into the air that is se warfare against me. The doors are closed. Stand clear of the closing doors, please.

Everything except for the particulate matter you just jettisoned into the air that is searing my lungs. I don't care about the person next to me who's eating the halal cart food because that is something you can digest. You cannot take the battery acid out of the air and expect me to process that without having a visceral reaction. 30 seconds. Axe deodorant. That shit is so loud I can fucking hear it. I hate that. I don't want you to fucking exercise your right

to do the most effortless amount of toxic masculinity you can. Wow! 15 seconds. You're pressing your index finger on a canister and enveloping yourself in a cloud of I don't give a fuck. If you're on your way to a job interview and you use Axe, you are fired before you even get the fucking job. and you use Axe, you are fired before you even get the fucking

job. Fuck you, Axe deodorant. Body spray. I hate you. That's one minute. Lena Einbinder. Man, Axe deodorant, no. And now, Shalewa Sharp. Come on, Shalewa.

Yes. So, reselected or this bull? Come on, Shalewa. Yes. Shalewa. So, three selected or this bowl? I've decided on a topic. Okay. That's very important to me. Good, good, good. We can't wait.

This is Shalewa Sharps. I don't think so, honey. Time starts now. I don't think so, honey, white people who only clap on the one and the three. Y'all is killing me three y'all is killing me y'all's killing me we made we made house music for you it's literally this how are you fucking that up not everything's a polka now look I understand I understand that there's bluegrass and you gotta clap on the one and the three there,

but what does your foot do? It goes down to two and the four. That's where the soul is. Listen to your goddamn feet. 30 seconds. Listen to your goddamn feet. Y'all are killing me. And this also goes for any white person who sings

and has had a hard time, and once they come out of it, they put a gospel choir in the back of their song. Now, y'all up there in the studio, you clapping on the one and the three, they don't even know where to sway. It's bullshit. Just, I knew from a little girl watching television, and I turned to my father and I said,

Papa, why are all the white people wrong? And he said, that's a question that may never be answered. That's what it is! Give it up for this group. Rule number 102 of culture. Listen to your goddamn feet. Listen to your feet. Tessa Scara, Ray Sotty,

Joe Castlebaker, Lita Einbeiner, Shalewa Sharp. Now, y'all, this is our final group, so give the love. This group is called UCB Torco. Give it up for Morgan Miller. Give it up for Timothy Dunn. There's Morgan.

Where's Timothy? Come on, Tim Dunn. Where you at? Okay, okay, okay. Wonderful. There's Timothy. Tim Dunn. Give it up for Sarah Grace motherfucking Wellborn. Give it up for Sarah Grace, motherfucking well-born.

Give it up for Aubrey Tabak. And give it up for the one and only Joshua D. Sharp. Josh Sharp. Josh Sharp. Oh, wow. Yes, bitch. Now this is it, you guys. I expect a lot of heat from this group.

All right, Morgan Miller. Morg. You doing pre-selected or you doing the bowl? You know, I think I'm going to go pre-selection. Okay, Morg. Morgan Miller's I Don't Think So, Honey. Time starts now. I don't think so, honey.

Girl who won't let me go down on her on her period. I don't think so, honey. You want some, you're getting some. Alright? Yeah, okay. A little bit of blood never hurt nobody okay

oh and we're starting to hook up and hands are going down pants and then you say no no I haven't no honey let me get up in there okay I don't watch Game of Thrones but I'm sure the Red Wedding was that oh

15 seconds. The red wedding was a bitch going down on another bitch who had her fucking period, okay? We're women. We bleed out our pussies. Let's lick it! That's one minute.

We're women. We bleed out of our pussies. Let's lick it. A standing ovation from the group. Home run. Home run. Found a thousand. Next up, we have Timothy Dunn.

Tim Dunn. This better be about eating ass. It's not. It's not. It could be. All right. Tim, what are we doing? The bowl or you have a pre-selected topic?

That took it out of me. I'm afraid I'm going to become a gay villain because of this, but I'm doing pre-selected. Pre-selected gay villain. Here we go. This is Timothy Dunn's I Don't Think So Honey. Time starts now. I Don't Think So Honey,

childless adults who go to Disney all the time. I don't get it. You're gonna spend thousands of dollars to go to Florida and then walk around a parking lot, essentially,

in 100 degree heat full of asshole children and renaissance fair performers and theater majors and fucking carnies? I don't think so, honey. You're already in Florida or California.

You know what's in Florida and California the fucking beach be an adult and go to the beach or go to Miami or go to Santa Barbara you been to Santa Barbara it's gorgeous I don't think so honey and Disney is fucking expensive as hell they trap you inside

and make you pay $10 for a fucking Coke Zero which is garbage and you say to me but it's so fun to drink around the world. Take your $1,000 vacation and you can go around the real fucking world. Go to Italy. Go to Prague.

Go like every basic bitch to Iceland. I don't care where you go. And you're like, oh, it's all about the fantasy. That's one minute. That's one minute. You're done. You're out of line, buddy.

More than enough, I think. It was worth getting squirted for that. You are out of fucking line, Timothy. More than enough. That was more than enough. Jesus, that was the worst bullshit I've ever fucking heard in my life. Every child should be able to go to Orlando. Every child should be able to go to Orlando. Every child.

He's talking about us. Adults are our children. They just haven't figured it out yet. Okay, guys, wow. Here we go. It is time. It is time. For Sarah Grace Welborn.

Get out of here. Are you fucking crazy? Sarah Grace Welborn. Get out of here. Are you fucking crazy? Sarah Grace Welborn, bring some normalcy back to this event. This is going to be so normal. Sarah Grace. Sarah Grace. Sarah Grace. What?

Pre-selected. Pre-selected. Okay, babe. I don't think so, honey. Is Brooklyn Crab in the house? Okay. Yes, Brooklyn Crab. Okay, this is I don't think so, honey. Is Brooklyn Crab in the house? Okay. Yes, Brooklyn Crab. Okay, this is Sarah Grace's I Don't Think So, Honey.

Time starts now. I Don't Think So, Honey IPA beers. Yes! Oh, my God. I ask people, why do you like this type of beer? And they say, because I like the way it tastes. No, you don't! It doesn't taste good!

Do you know about margaritas, bitch? Do you know about mojitos? Do you know about pjitos do you know about pina coladas rum and coke sex on the beach gin and tonic do you know about red zay bitch

15 seconds and they're like you know no I prefer a beverage where the chief descriptor is the word bitter which is otherwise used to describe food that has gone bad, medicine, and a promising relationship that ended prematurely. That's one minute.

Another standing ovation. Think so. You know what? You know what? Wow. This is an IPA right here. Yes, bitch. No, it's not. I would never buy an IPA right here. Yes, bitch. No, it's not.

I would never buy an IPA with my money. That's one minute. Order. Order. Decorum. The group mind in this group is insane. The group mind is unconscionable. Decorum, decorum at once.

Get out of here. The group mind is insane. UCB Torco. This is unconscionable. They are yes-ending and destroying the show. I can't believe this. Alright, you know what? Let's just keep going. Next up we have Aubrey Tabak.

Aubrey Tabak! Have some respect. I'm nervous. Don't be nervous. Here we go. What are we going to do? I'm going to do the bowl. You're going to do the bowl. I think this may be... I'm so scared I'm not going to know what it means. The do the bowl. You're going to do the bowl. I'm so scared. I'm not going to know what it means. The group mind up here is crazy.

This might be the last total. Oh, my God. Please pick something I know what it is. Okay, here we go, Abra. Abra. Oh, my God. Your I don't think so, honey topic is living in a city. Time starts now. I don't think so, honey. Living in a city. Time starts now.

I don't think so, honey. Living in a city is expensive. Okay, we all know that. But also, how about the fact that because you live in New York City,

you have to be living a good fucking life. Because people from all over the world are checking in with you and being like, what are you doing? You're like,

I don't have a kid. I don't have health insurance. Also, I don't remember the last time I ate fruit, a vegetable, or a home-cooked meal. Also, pasta is difficult. Okay? If you make pasta at home, congratulations.

You're our winner, baby. Also, the subway is stinky and hot. But that is your main source of transportation. Also, have you gone out in the woods? It's nice out there. It is very pleasant. 15 seconds. I don't remember how to drive.

I don't remember how to do laundry without my back hurting. Also, remember when it was easy just to get out of your bed and get a drink of water without tripping over all your shoes? I mean, what was that like? Also, what if we all lived in a house? What would it be like? We could have another room. That's what I meant. What if we all lived in a house?

What if we all lived in a house? What if we all lived in a house? What if? Jaw sharp. Jaw sharp. Jaw sharp. What if we all lived in a house? What if? Josh Sharp! Josh Sharp! Josh Sharp. All right, Josh. This is the final I Don't Think So Honey.

Oh, my gosh. Thank you for letting me headline. Headliner, Josh. You're welcome. I'll do 10. Light me at 15. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, I've preselected a topic.

Okay. That I feel is important to end the evening with. Okay, we love that. This is Josh Sharps' I Don't Think So, Honey. Time starts now. I don't think so, honey. I don't think so, honey. Yes, yes.

Listen, this community is about more than being shady, okay? You understand, you've assembled an incredible dais of women and gays and Jason Gore. And then you're going to make them all come out here and talk shit about how pears taste like soap. No, we should be celebrating the positives. You understand this is the time we live in. How about I do think so, honey.

30 seconds. When your grandma gives you $100 on your birthday, I do think so, honey! When you dry your favorite shirt on accident and then it fits better, I do think so, honey! Squirt me again, bitch. I've been wet before. Full fat fucking ice cream, I do think so, honey!

Now I know what you're going to say because you're trying to limit me. You about to say five seconds? Five seconds. Okay, so I have to say this. I love you, and I love you. I love this show. Do it forever, okay?

Thank you, baby. Las Cataristas. That's one minute. Wow. Josh Sharp. Give it up for this final group, UCB Torco. Group five, UCB Torco. UCB Torco.

Morgan Miller. Sarah Grace Bloodborne. Aubrey Tabak. Timothy Dunn. And Josh Sharp. Let it go. Just let it go. Oh my God.

Wow, you guys. This has been an incredible night. But it's not over yet. It's not over yet. We have two final orders of business to attend to. First, we're going to do the Spoke Raffle. This is if you downloaded the Spoke app, which we highly recommend. And you win this free $250 gift card to Chipotle. It's a free $250 gift card to Chipotle.

Which is safe. It's safe. Safe to use. God, I don't want to go through this again. All right, here we go. 9-2-4-6-5-4-0. Yes! Yes!

Oh, it's Jessie! Jessie Roth! Jessie Roth! Oh, my God! Oh, my God, it's Jessie! Jessie! Oh, my God, Jessie! Oh, my God.

It's so bad. Oh, my God. Guys, Jessie wins $250 in Chipotle, but she also gets to do an I Don't Think So Honey. And you get to do an I Don't Think So Honey, yes. Put the hat on. Yes, this is the moment. Here we go.

Jessie, put on that goddamn hat. Grab the mic. There it is, droop-a-loopin'. All right, this is the moment. Do I do trollable or pre-selected? I have one. Okay, great. She has one.

She's been thinking about it. I love the podcast. Of course I have one. Oh, Jessie. This is Jessie Ross. I Don't Think So Honey. Time starts now. Okay, great. She has one. She's been thinking about it. I love the podcast. Of course I have one. Oh, Jessie. This is Jessie Ross. I don't think so, honey. Time starts now. Okay, I don't think so, honey.

Cars that are turning left when you're trying to cross the street, okay? It's like you're a car. You're in a fucking vehicle that could kill me. Hold up and wait until I cross the street, okay? Yes. Yes, wait. Wait.

You're like creeping closer to me and trying to scare me and I'm like, no, no, no. You can wait. You have a brake button. Use it, bitch. Yes. All right. to me and trying to scare me and I'm like no no no you can wait you have a break button use it bitch yes all right I am just trying to get to work at the UCB training center yes I'm fearing for my life every single day and it's not fucking fair and you're a fucking escalade and you can get

uptown whenever you want 30 seconds driver oh my god I don't keep it going I hate it every single time. I'm like, stop. I don't know what else to say. Jessie Ross, give it up for Jessie. Oh baby, she got her point. But that is true. That is so true. You cars, all you cars, stop. Guys, we're going to do the final raffle. This goes to Trans Lifeline.

Yes. You're going to win this hat and a t-shirt. Yes, and I don't think so, honey. Here we go. If you would like to do one hat and a t-shirt. Yes, and I don't think so, honey. Here we go. If you would like to do one. 924-6695. 924- Yes!

Winner! That hat is yours, madame. That hat is yours. Oh my god. And what else did she get? A shirt? Wait, how many tickets did you buy? Oh, she bought so many. So many, and that is giving.

Look at this. You guys should be ashamed. Okay, all right. All right, here we go. Are you ready? Do you want to do the bowl or do you have one? I have one. Okay, great.

She's got one. And I know that it's not this show, but my brand is earnest and I adore you both. Thank you so much. Do it, do it, do you. What is your name? My name's Jen Keith. This is Jen Keith. Here we go. Amazing performer. Jen. Jen Keith. I don't think so, honey.

About to nail it. Yes. Time starts now. I don't think so, honey. The elderly 80-year-old man who I held the door for at the Times Square Ben and Jerry's and then said this to me. Oh, sweetheart, you gave me a scare. I thought you were Harry Potter.

My grandmother has dementia for real and whatever you have going on is not dementia, sir. Listen. God, what are you trying to prove? The gender revolution cover in time was two years ago. What are you getting at? I don't think so, honey. I am a gay woman.

I know how to be invisible, but where is my invisibility cloak? Yes! Where is it? Five seconds. I don't think so, honey. Unbelievable. Y'all, this was Last Culture Recess Live. I don't think so, honey. Thank you so much for coming.

Thank you, Spoke. Thank you, Forever Dog. Hot producer Joe. Hot producer Alex. Thank you, Littlefield. Thank you guys all so much for coming. Everyone, like and subscribe to the podcast on iTunes or wherever. You listen to podcasts.

We'll see you around the corner at Park Life after this. Thank you guys so much. Discount cocktails, come on. Thank you guys so much. Goodbye. Have a great night. Forever. Dog. This has been a Forever Dog production.

Executive produced by Joe Cilio, Alex Ramsey, and Brett Bohm. For more podcasts, please visit foreverdogproductions.com. Dog. I'm Julian Edelman. I'm Rob Gronkowski. And we are super excited to tell you about our new show, Dudes on Dudes. We're spilling all the behind-the-scenes stories, crazy details, and honestly, just having a blast talking football. Every week, we're discussing our favorite players of all times, from legends to our buddies to current stars.

We're finally answering the age-old question. What kind of dudes are these dudes? We're going to find out, Jules. New episodes drop every Thursday during the NFL season. Listen to Dudes on Dudes on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Cheryl Swoops. And I'm Tarika Foster-Brasby. And on our new podcast, we're talking about the real obstacles women face day to day. Because no matter who you are, there are levels to what we experience as women.

And T and I have no problem going there. Listen to Levels to This with Cheryl Swoops and Tarika Foster-Brasby, an iHeart Women's Sports production in partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment. You can find us on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Presented by Capital One, founding partner of iHeart Women's Sports. Hey, I'm Jay Shetty and I'm the host of On Purpose. My latest episode is with Jelly Roll.

This episode is one of the most honest and raw interviews I've ever had. We go deep into Jelly Roll's life story from being in and out of prison from the age of 13 to being one of today's biggest artists. I was a desperate delusional dreamer. Be a delusional dreamer.

Just don't be a desperate delusional dreamer. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Trust me, you won't want to miss this one. On Thanksgiving Day, 1999, five-year-old Cuban boy Elian Gonzalez was found off the coast of Florida.

And the question was, should the boy go back to his father in Cuba? Mr. Gonzalez wanted to go home and he wanted to take his son with him. Or stay with his relatives in Miami? Imagine that your mother died trying to get you to freedom. Listen to Chess Peace, the Elian Gonzalez story, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.