Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang - "Party Time" (w/ Sasheer Zamata)
Episode Date: July 6, 2017PARTY TIME, honeys! It’s post-July 4th and the QUEEN Sasheer Zamata joins Matt & Bowen in-studio for a MOMENTOUS cultural discussion that’s sure to make you say, “okay, yes, THIS!” Spoiler... alert, things get VERY DISNEY VERY QUICKLY. Why? Because ALL THREE are ZOMBIES for DIS! They talk Top 3 Favorite Disney movies, theme park horror stories, auditioning for Tokyo Disney, The Hall Of Presidents, The Goofy Movie…then later, they GET INTO Sasheer’s comedic origins, her love of improv, and much much more. Get listening, bitch, it’s important for your HEALTH!LAS CULTURISTAS HAS A PATREON! For $5/month, you get exclusive access to WEEKLY Patreon-ONLY Las Culturistas content!!https://www.patreon.com/lasculturistasCONNECT W/ LAS CULTURISTAS ON FACEBOOK & TWITTER for the best in "I Don't Think So, Honey" action, updates on live shows, conversations with the Las Culturistas community, and behind-the scenes photos/videos:www.facebook.com/lasculturistastwitter.com/lasculturistasLAS CULTURISTAS IS A FOREVER DOG PODCASThttp://foreverdogproductions.com/fdpn/podcasts/las-culturistas/ Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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My grandma and your grandma were sitting by the fire
My grandma told your grandma I'm gonna set your flag on fire
You're talking about henna, henna, henna
Aiko, aiko, ande
Jagamofino, anane
Jagamofinane
Ding dong, Las Culturistas calling
Wow
Wow
Let me tell you something
Let me tell you something let me tell you something
I
am
walking through
the Brooklyn neighborhood today
yes
I'm a little
early
for the recording
which
has been a point of contention
in this very room
okay
yes Bowen has
scolded me for being late
on some occasion
rightfully
and you know what
I'm doing my best
in fact
Sudi and I went to the beach
yesterday with a lot of friends
yes
and I was a half hour early oh my goodness to the pickup spot I'm doing my best. In fact, Sudi and I went to the beach yesterday with a lot of friends. Yes. And I was a half hour early.
Oh my goodness.
To the pickup spot. I'm really making strides.
That's great.
Literal strides.
This is a new leaf.
So today I'm arriving early in Brooklyn.
This is where we record the pod now.
Truly, we did it. We moved.
I mean, do you feel like a new man?
I feel like a new man and I have a new knowledge.
Because I'm stepping in the deli around the corner
and there's a
huge picture
of one Sarah Jessica Parker and I
have to ask because I'm culturista
I say I'm sorry I noticed your
giant picture of SJP
what's going on is she a regular
he says no she was in here once
I was like oh okay she just
stopped in he goes no she was in here
for two hours I was like what was she doing in here once. I was like, oh, okay. She just stopped in. He goes, no, she was in here for two hours. I was like,
what was she doing in here for two hours?
He goes, she shot a movie
here. I was like, what? Was it a Section of the
City sequel? He goes,
it was a stupid movie called I Don't
Know How She Does It. Oh, I was gonna guess.
Not a bad movie and a very
Brooklyn Heights. We're in Brooklyn Heights. It's a very
Brooklyn Heights movie. You said not a bad movie?
I said not a bad Brooklyn Heights movie, maybe. We're in Brooklyn Heights. It's a very Brooklyn Heights movie. You said not a bad movie? I said not a
bad Brooklyn Heights movie, maybe. We'll roll
that back later. Oh my god, you guys.
We are so excited.
This is a great episode, you guys. I'm just gonna say.
I'm gonna forecast.
I have big predictions for
this one, and my predictions are
Peabody Award winning. Peabody Award winning up.
Coming right at you. We have an amazing guest.
Let's go through the credits.
We shall.
The host of Party Time, and I don't want to say it's with her name, but I don't want to reveal it.
Of course, of course.
So Party Time with the guest.
And the next one is on July 16th at the Bell House.
And you must go.
We've done it with our group, Popper Lit, and had a blast.
So fun.
It really is very fun.
You got to go.
And some recordings, a video of it is on Above Average. So check that out really is very fun. You gotta go. And some recordings,
video of it is on Above Average,
so check that out before you go to the show.
Just so you know what you're getting into,
honey. It's an experience.
Oh, variety experience. Of course.
And you can see her stand-up special, Pizza Mind,
on Seesaw, or the audio is
on iTunes and Spotify. It's so good.
Look it up. Look it up. Guess what?
You know her. You'll love her.
It's Sashir Zameda!
Party time indeed!
Party time!
We're very happy to have you here today.
I'm so happy to be here.
We, of course, slayed it
on our first I Don't Think So Honey Live.
Thank you! I've been
pulled aside and people have been like,
I saw you at that show
and loved it
oh my god
you took that
and gave it to cats
I didn't know
and you know what
also providing us information
yes
I didn't know that
and I turned that
into a whole bit
because I was like
one of the first times
I said that on stage
oh amazing
and I was like
oh I see beats here
so I made it a joke
yeah
it's solid
guys go back
and listen to it
four cats
by cats
I don't think so honey
oh yeah
should I explain
what it is
yeah do it
please
it was
my I don't think so honey
was about Frisky's cat food
and how they
have appropriated
for us by us
they took it
and said
four cats
by cats
which doesn't make sense no cats don't make the food the cats are nothing and they took away from said for cats by cats which doesn't make sense
no
cats don't make the food
the cats are nothing
and they took away from FUBU
which is
like a historically black owned
black provided
clothing company
yeah
and they gave it to cats
unbelievable
and you know what
this is what I love about
I don't think so honey
I love the educational aspect
yes
and that's what I say to
people that may be doing the next I don't Think So Honey if there is one.
I don't know.
We may have posted some cryptic things on Instagram as if we're minions or something, the movie.
It's just a numeral?
It's just a numeral.
And a date.
Who do we think we are?
I don't know.
I just think it's so stupid.
It's so dumb.
I did a show one time and I said to Bo and I was like, I want my name over the title like I'm Meryl Streep in Into the Woods.
I just think it's funny to like, iconicize and you're nobody.
Yeah, but I feel like that's such a wink.
Like, people can't necessarily pick up on that.
I don't care.
This person's taking themselves too seriously.
That's true.
Yeah, they might think it's sincere.
And this comes from someone with her name in the title of her show.
Oh, yeah.
Party Time With. It's not even with. it's Sashir Zameda Party Task
my name is first
lead with the name you front load it
you know what
well you gotta know what you're getting
I will be there every show
there's no understudy for this
right I mean tell us about the show
we did it was so fun but like
you're trying to cultivate this
fun environment.
Yeah. I wanted to feel like a party.
It's definitely a show.
It's a variety show and there's
stand-ups doing their stand-up
acts but it's kind of like anything can happen.
People have done characters. People have
done bits.
We have music. You guys came on and that was so so
fun.
It's just like a mix of things.
I want the audience to feel like they are a part of the party instead of like a wall being there and they're like just watching a performance.
And we have party games where the audience gets involved and like there's kind of an underlying of truth in everything.
Kind of everything I do really. But, uh, in this show in particular,
like we have a game like honest Jenga where,
uh,
audience members wrote down questions on Jenga pieces and the performers will
pull them and answer them honestly.
I love it.
Yeah.
I know they all like kind of like big old truth questions.
Like they really ask you to confront yourself.
Yeah.
I love that.
So we,
the first time we tried it, we got a lot of sex questions.
People were like horny for some reason.
And then there was like a Trump question.
This was sometime shortly after the election.
I can't remember how they phrased it, but it was like,
how could a person vote for Trump or something like that?
And I answered honestly because I was like, well, I could see why a person would.
And talked about people I know in my life
who have had more conservative views
and why I think they got to that point.
That's the kind of knee-slapping entertainment
you're going to get at party time.
Honestly, yeah.
Right after it happened,
I was like, oh my God,
when can we joke about this? Because it is so real. But now I'm ready to, if not Right after it happened, I was like, oh my God, when can we joke about this?
Because it is so real.
But now I'm ready to, if not laugh at the situation, because it is still very bad,
at least see the humor and a lot of the truth, like you're saying.
Thinking about my relatives that voted for him, I'm like, wow, you really got duped.
Like, it's...
Yeah.
It is funny.
I don't...
Well, I mean... It is. It is. It is funny I don't well I mean
it is
I think
it's funny
I still
I thought I had some distance from it
and then I was just
in like central Virginia
over the weekend
oh I was in Charlottesville
oh nice
it's my first time
cause okay
so she worked at UVA
I did
I was there
cause my sister's
uncle's
uncle and aunt-in-law
okay
have a lake house there, Lake Anna.
Oh, great.
I don't know if that rings any bells.
It looks beautiful.
That must have been beautiful.
It was very nice, but it's Trump country.
A lot of signs about how immigrants are stealing our jobs, like signs.
Signs about it.
Just on the side of the road next to a gas station, next to a Wegmans.
I thought I had some distance from it and then just being like inundated with that i was
like oh no this is i know i'm still this is still very fresh to me i don't know but and you know
what teach their own anytime you're not in the city you're gonna find that yeah because even on
long island where i'm from it's like most people yeah i would say most here oh yeah yeah the bubble yeah we know the snl sketch
did you write that i didn't write it but i was you were in it yeah it was that was one of the
highlights i thought yeah i thought i loved it it was the first piece of significant trump era art
that was wow that was and you know what yes that was post the election it was post the election and yeah it was like
one of the few things we did that was
kind of
jabbing at
the other side the liberals
instead of just was that the week of Chappelle's
episode was that the week right after the election or no
I don't think so I can't remember I think it was
pretty soon after but it was like
this it was just a very like oh like a whoa like this. It was just a very like, oh, like a whoa.
Like, that's a funny way.
That's like kind of the only way you can joke about this right now.
Yeah.
Because it's so soon.
Anyway.
Oh, my God.
So, Shira, we're going to ask you what we ask all of our guests, which is what was the culture that made you say cultures for me?
I want to step in a cultural direction.
Yes.
You said, OK, I could get interested in culture for sure.
I could integrate that into my personal brand.
I think the culture that I was first introduced to
and stayed in my life the longest was Disney.
You've come to the right place.
Thank God.
Yeah.
I watched so many Disney movies,
and Little Mermaid was my favorite.
I watched it over and over again.
But it wasn't until later when I was like,
oh, this is kind of messed up,
because she just traded her voice for
literally a vagina.
She was like,
I'd rather have legs and a vagina and a man
than speak.
I actually think it might have been even Sudi that brought that up to me.
Like, cause she was really the one who like took the like blind off my eyes and was like,
look at, you're in the machine.
As she's wont to do.
And I, she was like, think about Little Mermaid.
She doesn't even have a voice.
And I found myself trying to justify it.
And I was like, nope, there's nothing there.
She literally doesn't speak and he's in love with her.
Here's the thing.
We can all have professor dads and librarian moms, Sudie.
That's true.
Some of us grew up on Disney and it was the only thing.
Or like a worldly perspective at all.
So you know what?
Matt and I are fucking zombies for Diz.
Oh, they're still fun.
They're still fun.
You know what?
You just have to toss away any of the corporate nonsense and just have fun there because it is what it is.
Did you go to the parks?
I did go to the parks.
I remember going to, I think, Disneyland.
And this obviously left an impression because I still remember it.
But there was a water fountain that changed colors.
Like the water, when you drank it, like the water that was coming out changed colors.
And it took me years to realize it was a light.
It was light, yeah.
It was a light.
It was a light.
I was like, this water is changing colors.
You truly buy into it.
And you're like, you're there.
Yeah.
I went by myself a couple years ago. Like, I was in around Orlando doing a show, and I was like, I have a couple days to kill.
I'm going to the Grand Floridian.
You booked a room at the Grand Floridian?
I did.
That's how you know.
Good for you.
You're like, not only am I going, I'm going to stay in the Grand Floridian.
Yeah, I'm really going.
I saw, I went to downtown Disney the Grand Floridian yeah I'm really going I saw I went to
downtown Disney
and saw
Cirque du Soleil shows
Cirque du Soleil
yep
I saw the
electric light parade
uh huh
I saw
I think
I think the Animal Kingdom
was closed
so I couldn't go
to see
the Jam and Juggle Parade
which
so I also worked at Disney
oh you did
oh my god
oh my god
oh my god
oh I need to know about that
wait I think I knew this.
Yeah.
Okay.
I did the Disney college program.
Yes.
So it was like my third year of college and then, or like half a semester and a summer.
And I walked on stilts in Mickey's Jam and Jungle Parade.
In Orlando or in?
In Orlando.
Wow.
Yeah, at World.
And I also was the Sebastian puppet.
Oh, thank God.
Oh my God.
For the musical? for the live show?
For the live show yeah and we had these
black light puppets and we were all
in black
clothing and had like a shroud on our face
and then everything was dark
and we kind of had these puppets
floating in the air but we're just
walking on stage.
And there was a door
an exit that led straight out to the sun.
So if anyone had a crying baby
or needed to leave for some reason,
if they opened the door,
you just saw all these adults
walking on stage and holding puppets.
Starkly lit.
That is like the one thing that,
it's so funny because like,
not realizing it's a light in the fountain
and then like one day you're like,
oh, it's literally a fucking light.
Come on.
I remember being in Pirates of the Caribbean
when I was little and looking up and being like,
the sky is so dark and cloudy and black.
It's literally probably 20 feet up and it's a ceiling.
You're just not looking.
But that's part of the magic.
Still an amazing illusion.
They're good.
I always call it theater.
I totally forgot.
You are actually very much a Disney,
and even just specific to the parks.
Like Matt and I, huge part of our identity
is that we fucking love the parks.
We love it.
We love.
And I think you are actually sort of like
in the same sort of dumb cast, C-A-S-T-E cast, of just the Disney park lovers.
Would you say that's true?
Yes.
Okay.
Nothing about being a – but no, every cast member at Disney World is like a total follower, like a loyal –
They brainwash you.
They do brainwash – but like willingly willingly like I would willingly be brainwashed
I've been brainwashed
probably yes
yeah I was into it
but I didn't realize
it until I left
how much
they got in there
yeah
what were some of like
can you think of some
like little things
that they did to like
worm their way in
they said that
so the custodians
are called shopkeepers
uh huh
uh huh
uh huh
and they said
we have X amount of shopkeepers employed, but really we have 50,000 because all of you are responsible to keep this park clean because this is your home and you don't want your home to be dirty.
So even when I was off duty, I would walk around the park and see trash and be like, gotta pick it up.
My house.
My house.
And that is how it's so clean.
Oh my God.
But that is actually
brilliant operational stuff.
Truly.
It's like,
they're caring about,
they're taking care
of their employees
who then take care of
like your consumer customer
or whatever.
Yeah.
So it's actually
very good business.
That makes a lot of sense.
I've said on the podcast before,
when I was there with my sister,
we went up to
the new Beauty and the Beast restaurant.
I guess it's a-
Be Our Guest.
Be Our Guest restaurant.
And you couldn't get a table.
I mean, we booked a trip like one time
four months in advance and it was booked.
So my sister and I, not knowing this,
like years ago went up and we're like,
hey, can we get a table?
And she was like, unfortunately, no.
Like we're all booked up.
I'm so sorry about that.
We were like, totally fine.
We stepped to the side.
The people behind us asked the same question, did not react kindly.
But the girl was still like, yeah, oh my gosh, I still hope you have a magical day.
And it's so enchanting to meet you.
And I was like, how is she doing that?
Because literally, there's a certain basic human level where any of them would crack.
But they don't crack.
They don't.
That's crazy.
How?
How?
Oh, although, no, okay.
This is the one time I've seen a cast member crack
and it was very recently, a month ago.
Oh yeah, you were just there.
Yeah, I was just there at the Animal Kingdom
with me, Michael Hartney, Suni Tamani, Eric Gerson.
We all went and we went to Animal Kingdom.
We went to go see like just the,
not the safari zone,
but it was just where they kept all the monkeys.
And then there were mere cats who aren't,
that aren't technically monkeys,
but there were mere cats running around.
And then Hartney like made a sound,
like made like a whistling sound
or like a some sort of tongue clicking sound.
At an animal?
At an animal.
And one of the cast members
flipped out
and was like
sir you can't do that
that like
sir you cannot make those
noises at the meerkats
because they will
get very agitated
because they are trying
to do their jobs
which is to protect
their families
and we were all like
what?
my god
we were like
okay
unless that person
that was like their
like role to play.
That's probably their one job.
Their one job.
Fine.
I mean, but it was a little.
It's crazy to see them act like humans.
I know.
It was like being chastised.
That's never happened to me in a Disney book.
Meanwhile, at Universal Studios, they're like rolling their eyes at you.
Popcorn all over the floor.
Yeah, garbage.
I was at a Six Flags.
Oh.
And, uh.
Oh.
Trashville.
That's not someone's home.
I was actually there
with Josh Sharp
and we saw a kid
have a seizure.
And he,
it was like,
it was the ride that like,
you like sit
and it kind of spins
in circles around. Yeah, yeah. It's like a centrifuge thing. Yeah, it looks like a. One ride that like where you like sit and it kind of spins in circles around
yeah yeah
like a centrifuge thing
yeah
one of those
yeah so
we haven't gone on yet
but we're like walking to it
oh my god wait
the swings
the swings
yes
I was just there with him
and he told me about this
he's a little Six Flags boy
yeah yeah yeah
yeah
and uh
I mean they do have good rides
yeah they're great
good fun rides
you want the thrills
go out on a bus.
You want the magic, you go to Disney.
You go to the atmosphere.
Yeah.
And the kid had a seizure.
He had a seizure and fell on the ground.
And so, like, someone radioed somebody.
But it was like, it felt like an eternity before anyone got there.
And it was, like, just a bunch of 16-year-olds.
And I was like, where's the medic?
Yeah, yeah.
And, you know, the park cast member in me kicked in.
Because it felt like if we were at Disney, this would have been handled like that.
Because he would have been underground in a second.
Because there are so many entrances all over the place.
And all you had to do was hit a button or radio somebody.
And then someone would have came with a cart.
Because there is one close by.
And then they would have taken you underground
to where the medic is.
And it's like,
I was just so shocked
that it was taking so long for this kid
to be attended to.
To get helped in any way.
Yes, tell this.
Tell this.
This is so good.
This is just a really quick story.
This reminds me of a story
that I just learned about very recently.
We have this comedian,
his name is ****,
he's wonderful.
I saw him at a show one time in the last couple weeks, and he was wearing a Blizzard Beach shirt.
And I was like, oh, my God, Blizzard Beach, Disney World.
I love Disney World, blah, blah, blah.
And he goes, yeah, my family gets to go for free once a year.
And I go, oh, my God, that's amazing.
What?
Like, how did you guys get that hookup?
And he was like, well, when I was young when i was about like 10 something years old my
brother and i were at blizzard beach and an umbrella fell on his head that like basically
stabbed him in the skull on the top of a slide so that he was so then he pulled it out and blood just
spilled everywhere you can't believe and so so immediately, immediately, like, just medics, Disney, cast members rushed
up to him, took him to the hospital,
and so, and this guy
and his mom were just kind of, they just kind of
left them there, and they, well, not that they left them
there, but they had to slide
down the bloody slide
of his brother's blood,
got to the bottom,
and then once they got out of the, like, a limo,
they were escorted immediately to a limo
a Disney, like Disney paid for a limo
to drive them to the hospital
and then once they get to the hospital
a pack of lawyers
just have all this paperwork
that's just like sign here, sign here, sign here
just like you will not sue us
you will not like you know
just speak out against this to the media
whatever
and so they did and then once they got back to their resort there were just fruit You will not like, you know, just speak out against this to the media, whatever.
And so they did.
And then once they got back to their resort, there were just fruit baskets, gift baskets. Yeah.
Like every single swag from Disney.
And they get a free trip out of every year.
Every year.
Wow.
Yeah.
And I'm just secretly a little jealous.
Oh my God.
I was saying to myself, I was like, would I take an umbrella
literally in the head
like maybe die
to be able to go for free
every year?
And the answer is
like maybe.
Yeah, probably.
I can't remember the pain now.
Seems like it didn't do
any long-term damage.
Yeah, what happened to him?
That's questionable.
I think he's fine.
Well, this,
well, very jokingly.
We also have to take
his name out of this
because he definitely
signed like an NDA.
Oh my god.
You said his first and last name.
No, you said his job.
You said his first and last name.
I mean.
Oh my god.
And like threw Disney under the bus.
We can't get this man killed.
And yeah, you know what?
He will, a sniper will kill him.
There's no way.
All right, we're gonna bleep that out.
Okay.
Oh my god, I'm so sorry.
I'm mad at Disney now, though.
Why?
I'm mad at them right now because of the Donald Trump Hall of Presidents thing.
Oh, yes.
Have you heard about this?
No.
What is it?
So you know how in the Hall of Presidents, there's the presidents.
Yeah.
And we know how, unfortunately, Donald Trump is the president.
So they took it down and they put the Obama animatronic in the back,
like where it goes now.
And, of course, now they have, like, the Donald Trump animatronic.
So now it's, like, the whole back line of presidents
and Donald Trump is going to be, like, prominently displayed.
And he is going to give, like, a speech.
So there was, like, a movement that I may or may not have had a part in.
I did make a change.org petition and it got
over 15,000 signatures.
He sparks the movement.
There was people being like,
he shouldn't speak. We shouldn't have
to listen to it.
He's certainly unkind, at the
very least, to say to immigrants.
Obviously, he says what he says about women, about
racial minorities, about
his actions towards the LGBT community.
Just not for Disney.
So now they've come out and they said officially he is going to speak.
And there will be a section in it where he says his thing.
Because they kind of caved, because I guess Disney, they will have a lot of Trump voters rolling through there.
They will.
But it was pretty touch and go for a while
because there were some articles that came out
that were talking about how the White House wasn't cooperating.
They weren't sending Disney any audio.
And it went all the way up to Bob Iger,
who is CEO of Disney,
who came out with a statement that was like,
we are still discussing this.
And then I was telling my brother-in-law about this
over the weekend.
And he's like, well, Bob Iger might run for president,
which would be crazy like the
CEO of Disney being
president might be great
but might be bad I don't know
what do we think I don't know
I don't know it's the kind of man who sends in
a car when you get it impaled in the head
and is like so I'm here he
runs a better business than the current
president we have right now.
That is very much true.
That's fair.
And he knows how to be a diplomat
because of the World Showcase at Epcot.
He knows all the countries very well.
He knows all of them.
All of them.
He knows their food.
Yes.
Their drinks.
Their drinks, their cocktails Yes Their drinks Their drinks
Their cocktail
Their dress
Their gifts
The movie that's most closely associated
With their country
I love how they just took Norway
And made it frozen
Yep
That happened too
When's the last time you went?
I did go to Epcot
When I went as an adult
A couple years ago
I just did it quickly though
I didn't go all the way
around the world.
It's a quick park.
Yeah.
Quick park.
Any specific,
besides Little Mermaid,
Disney stuff that's like,
and your experience
with the parks, obviously,
but favorite movie
is still Little Mermaid.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, even though I know
how it's bad for feminism.
Music is so good.
Right, Kate.
Maybe this is a better question.
Rank,
and we can all do this. Oh wow. Here we go.
Rank top three? Okay.
Okay. Matt you want to start?
Yes. I would love to start.
Now
here's the thing. I have
a number one but I have a couple caveats
with it. Okay. My number one
is
Pocahontas. Now I know
that it's troubling because this is is Pocahontas. Now I know that
it's troubling.
Sure.
Because this is not the story
of Pocahontas.
However,
I like the story
that it tells.
Interesting.
It's a revisionist
but I do like it.
However,
it would have been
a perfect movie
had they not
dumbed it down
because actually
Pocahontas was supposed
to have a different ending
and there was a song
in the movie which was a love song between them.
If I Never Knew You.
If I Never Knew You, which is like when they've captured him
and she goes to him in the tent that they're keeping him in
and they have this beautiful song together.
And then when he leaves at the end because he's injured
and she stays behind in America,
there's this beautiful reprise of it and it's just
so gorgeous and you can see
on YouTube they have it like if you ever
want to like fill in this Pocahontas
it's on YouTube and they use the storyboards
to fill in the animated parts
that they never did so you can
kind of hear it all through and it's just really beautiful
so that would have been probably
number one had they kept all that
and they took that out because they tested it with kids
and they were bored. Right.
Because they showed it to families
and they were like, our kid
fell asleep at this part. Which is to be understood
because it's a very kind of serious,
more serious Disney movie.
So I would say for that reason
that one's number two. For me, probably
Lion King is number one.
It's so amazing.
And then I would say
maybe number three
is The Little Mermaid
or Mulan.
Okay.
Wow.
Yeah.
That's good.
That's solid.
But then I'm thinking musical.
I also love Monsters, Inc.
Love Monsters, Inc.
Yeah.
But the fact that
Monsters, Inc.
is not a musical.
Oh, we're including Pixar.
I don't know.
I don't know.
Minds up for debate. I have a lot of Oh, we're including Pixar in that. I don't know. I don't know. Mine's up for debate.
I have a lot of faves.
Beauty and the Beast and Aladdin, for some reason, I never connected with them, though
I did love the live action.
Okay, I'm done.
I have a lot of thoughts about Disney.
Okay.
I'll go really quickly, but this is tough.
Wow, I asked a really-
It's a hard one.
It's a culture-y question.
Absolutely.
Okay, number one.
Number one.
Oh my God.
Mulan.
And not just because it's like culturally I connect to it,
but because it's very-
But yeah.
It's very feminine.
It's very queer.
It is very queer.
It makes me cry every fucking time.
Yeah.
At the very end when he returns.
The father.
And he throws, like she hands him the sword
and he doesn't even look at it.
He just tosses it aside and hugs her.
Oh my God., my God.
Oh, my God.
You'll get me every time when you have a father telling their child, I'm so proud.
Every time I'll be like, ah, daddy.
Absolutely.
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So Mulan's number one.
Number two, this is a controversial one, but a well-documented one in my personal history.
Oh, God, no.
Wreck-It Ralph.
It's so fucking good.
Wow.
Sarah Silverman, so fucking good.
Yeah.
Number three.
A true talent.
I mean, she's technically, I mean, I don't think her character is canonized in the Disney
Princesses, but she plays a princess.
And it's just a really good story about how she has to fight for that title back.
It's really, really, really great.
And then number three, Lion King or Aladdin, because I connect to those.
Or, oh, three-way tie, which maybe I can't do.
I did a three-way tie. Go for it. Lion King, Aladdin, Little Mermaid. Okay, that's fine. those. Or, oh, Three-Way Tie, which maybe I can't do. I did a Three-Way Tie.
Lion King, Aladdin, Little Mermaid.
Okay, that's fine.
Yeah.
Great.
Great.
Okay.
What are you thinking here?
I have to change my number one, because I forgot a movie.
Okay.
Because it's not a classic.
Yes.
But a goofy movie.
Oh, great.
Great choice.
Wow.
Good one.
Yeah.
That's my fave for sure.
The stand-up.
Oh, God.
Oh, my God.
Unbelievable. Great music. Oh, my God. Unbelievable.
The great music.
Yeah, so good.
And I had never seen a relationship that was tumultuous between a parent and a kid like that.
Yeah, that was a really good point.
Which I really connected to.
Like seeing Goofy, who was just trying to be a good single dad.
Yes.
And Max, who was so over his dull, weirdo dad and wanted to be a good single dad and max who was like so over his dull like weirdo dad and wanted
to be cool and they like you know they fought he ran away there was like a whole thing where it
was like them really trying to make this work and and yeah i can't think of too many other disney
movies that do that where it's like you really explore the relationship of the parent and the
child yes it's usually like someone's looking
for the parent or the child or like they're
separated for a long time for some reason but they were
like together for most of it and they were really
struggling and I really loved that.
So yeah, that would be my number one.
I think Little Memory is still number
two. Yes. It's iconic.
It's iconic. Yeah.
I love it. And
I mean, I really loved WALL-E.
Okay, yes.
I haven't seen that one.
Oh, man.
I think it's got a good message.
Yes.
And I just thought it was, yeah, I thought it was really good and smart.
Yeah.
But also, I love Lion King.
The thing is, like, Lion King is one where I think if we were all to watch them all literally
tonight, we would all in the morning say Lion King is one where I think if we were all to watch them all literally tonight we would
be we would all in the morning say Lion King probably we would be like the thing is guys
Lion King is really the best yeah the circle of life as an intro to a movie and then when it goes
boom and it says the Lion King over that sun come on it's in that deep red like color font it's iconic on every level and they don't try
that hard anymore
no
I did rewatch
I skimmed through
Moana again last night
and guys
I still don't know
I still
jury
I mean it's not
I need to give it
another chance
I think Matt and I
saw when we were
sort of
tired
tired
we were tired
let's put it that way.
We were tired and maybe
I need to give it another chance.
You just said you tried to.
I watched it once and I was
into it truly until the end when I was
like, now too many things are happening.
I don't know what's going on.
I guess she's a mountain. It was like
too many metaphors.
I was like, what's literal?
What's actually happening?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It was a little too much.
Thank you so much.
And guys, I mean, do not come for any of us,
but some people on this very show,
on this recording have come for me and Matt
because of our controversial views.
Controversial views on Moana.
I just don't, I wanted it to be so much better than it was.
I will say now listing all these classics,
I have to say Frozen is not up there.
I don't think so.
It's really not.
I enjoyed it, but it's not up there for me.
Isn't it crazy?
What a phenomenon, though.
What was it about it?
I think a lot of it was the song,
but that's one of those situations
where the piece of culture that just takes over in a way and you're kind of like, why?
Because Let It Go's good, but that song is the reason I think why that movie was so big.
It was like a My Heart Will Go On level.
Yeah, yeah.
Take over the culture moment.
Yeah, something about those specific notes.
Yeah.
Really hit hard with kids. Yeah, something about those specific notes. Yeah. Really hit hard with kids.
Yeah, it's like a spell.
Yeah.
But then the kids took over that zeitgeist moment,
which doesn't really happen.
Yeah.
It was very much a child-led moment.
Yeah.
It was a revolution.
Parents were like, I don't know, they like it.
I don't know what to do.
I guess we'll love it too.
Yeah.
We have to.
Yeah.
I did watch that and then Brave in a row on a plane.
It was so empowered.
Yeah, yeah.
So much girl power in both those movies.
And I really did like that in Frozen.
Yeah.
It was like these two sisters and no one fell in love.
Right.
I love that.
Yeah, that was great.
I love that they weren't like,
and then she marries this man
and then she found my,
like, Elsa truly was alone.
She didn't even have an option
for a significant other.
I was like, I love that.
Yeah, she was,
her journey was entirely individual.
Yeah.
And even like Anna and Kristoffer,
Anna's just like,
oh no, they'll like hook up.
Yeah.
But they're not getting married.
Yeah, they're just like,
yeah, and I also love
that they called it out early too when she was like, I'm getting engaged and everyone's like, you, no, they'll hook up. Yeah. But they're not getting married. Yeah. They're just like, yeah. And I also love that they called it out early, too, when she was like, I'm getting engaged.
And everyone's like, you don't know this person.
You need to chat with them a little longer.
What are you doing?
I did love that.
I liked that.
I do think that Frozen has a lot of great elements.
But I feel like, yeah, I don't know what's not congealing.
Oh, I will say, just to get back to Lion King before we go on a quick break. Best live,
one of the best live things
I've ever seen
was the Lion King live show
at Animal Kingdom.
At Animal Kingdom.
Festival of the Lion King.
Yes, Festival of the Lion King.
It was amazing.
Like I wasn't even like
drunk or anything.
I was just so happy.
Like the acrobat,
the acrobats in it
are incredible.
Oh my God.
Yeah, they're the top of their game.
Top of their game.
Disney has amazing talent.
Yeah.
That's the thing.
And then I was also thinking, why do they take it so seriously?
How are they not breaking?
Because when you live in Orlando, there's no bigger than that.
I mean, there's no bigger than Disney World.
Booking Indiana Jones in that show, that's a big part.
You get seen by thousands of people.
Every day.
Every day.
That's not a bad gig.
No.
Like, I remember,
because they have stilt dancers
in the Festival of Lion King.
And they could only be men
because the stilts were longer and heavier.
And so they were like,
oh, I guess only men could lift them.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I wasn't allowed to try it.
That sucks.
But yeah, at the time, only men were cast in those parts.
I smell a petition.
I will say that.
And you know that we're aching to go on those change.orgs.
It kind of disappointed me that the movement I started
just died. But you know what?
It went far, it sounds like. It went far.
It made news and I was never
like, well some of the news articles did
mention my name and I kind of felt like, oh shit.
It was like kind of a joke in the beginning and then
it became more. But
then like in the latest round of news
which has been the announcement that
he is speaking, they haven't really mentioned it.
So I'm hoping that, like, it kind of just goes away.
Yeah.
Don't worry about it.
He should just be, like, huge.
Yeah.
Bigly.
Like, just, like, repeating words over and over again.
I'm sure.
Well, this is actually what the controversy was, was they were like, we'll write for you what we want you to say.
And then you'll record it.
We'll fly to the White House and we'll record it with you.
And they were like, no, no, no, he's going to write down what he says.
And they were like, that's not how this works.
So what did they end up doing?
I think they did eventually get to a place where he's going to have the okay on what
they write. So they'll write something super innocuous
and very much like,
America for years has been great.
And it'll be like that,
and he'll be like, okay.
Because, I mean,
you can't let him write it.
You can't trust him.
What presidential thing could he possibly write himself?
It's shocking.
America first.
Countries don't laugh at us anymore.
American carnage.
Whatever.
Before we go on a quick break, let's
read out a user
submitted rule of culture.
Yes, now this is a new segment.
This is a new segment. So every week we're gonna
take in new suggestions
for rules of culture. Just either tweet them at us,
comment on our Facebook page.
This one today comes from Kelly Briscoe.
Kelly Briscoe, who has decreed that rule number 37,
and this really touched me,
is the Kelly Clarkson version is the definitive version.
I'm looking at you, Hamilton.
I'm looking at you.
It's quiet uptown.
Thoughts on Kelly Saussure? I love her. Yes. She. I'm looking at you. It's quiet uptown. Thoughts on Kelly Sashir?
I love her.
Yes.
She's so great.
Great voice.
And yeah, I usually like her covers better than...
Almost always.
Almost always, yeah.
There you go.
And that is a thing with her.
Actually, I recently...
Today, I listened to Since You've Been Gone.
Uh-huh.
And I was like,
her original music hasn't been like this good
in a long time,
where now she's like doing the covers,
but also now she's gonna be on a new label.
Sure.
Oh, that's good.
She's on a new label,
and she's releasing a soul record,
as she calls it.
Oh, yes.
That's what she is.
That's what we need.
And that's the thing,
is it's like Kelly Clarkson,
she,
this is so classic,
that the whole first half of this episode
has been Disney and Kelly Clarkson.
You gotta understand. and Kelly Clarkson you gotta understand
but Kelly Clarkson
she will always come back
in the news because she's a
fierce singer
she's gonna
nail my country tis of thee at the
Obama inauguration she's gonna
make you cry on American Idol singing that
piece by piece song.
She's always going to be back in the news for having a great voice.
I do, and I'm not going to say devil's advocate because I hate that.
What other covers of hers are definitive?
All I can think of is It's Quiet Uptown, her Christmas album.
And then what else?
Well, she does in her tours.
At her concerts, yeah.
She always says other people's songs.
That's so true.
I can't think of one off the top of my head,
but it's usually like, here's a Katy Perry song.
Yes.
And she destroys it.
She sang Wide Awake one time by Katy Perry.
She's like, I like this song.
And it was so much better than Katy Perry version.
I'm sure.
She even did Lose Yourself by Eminem.
She'll do any song.
And she can sing any style.
Any style.
I remember I went to the concert where she, it wasn't a cover per se.
It was like a throwback.
And she performed this old big band song she did on Big Band Week on American Idol called
Stuff Like That There, which actually was performed in a movie by Bette Midler or something.
It's like a very like for Troops, For the Boys song.
But it's so good. And she
sings it and you feel like you're in 1940
goddamn too. Okay.
1940 goddamn too.
So the Kelly Clarkson version is the
definitive version. Thank you so much. Kelly
Breskell, that's rule number 37.
The Kelly Clarkson version is the definitive version.
Let's go on a quick break. Well, wait. Can I say
one more rule that I think we've decided?
Yes, okay.
Is rule number 109.
When you wake up in the morning, it's the Lion King.
After a marathon.
I'm Alyssa Edwards, tongue clinging.
Guys, you heard it here first.
Okay, we'll be right back with Sashir.
Yay!
And we're back discussing
eating on the mic
yeah
well I mean
so Matt very generously
poured his
what are these
pretzel M&M's
plug it
plug it
pretzel M&M's
sponsor
sponsor
honestly
why not
come on M&M's
is that Nestle
well no no I think M&M's their own company Mars oh on, M&M's. Is that Nestle? Well.
No.
No, I think M&M is their own company.
Oh, I think M&M is Mars.
Really?
Oh, wait, no.
M&M is their, yeah, they've got their own store.
They've got their own company.
They've got their own store.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Did you know this?
Maybe I've said this before.
Maybe you don't know this this year.
The M&M store in Times Square is the single most visited tourist destination in America.
Really?
Yes.
I don't believe that.
It is because you have to do the math.
Times Square is the most visited tourist destination in the country.
The spot in Times Square that gets the most visitors is the M&M store,
which would mean that that's true.
Would you count the TKTS booth?
What's the location?
I don't know. I think
in terms of people that walk through the door.
There's the person clicking
or whatever. Or they know somehow.
I don't know if there's someone clicking.
But that's what they say. That's what I'm told to say
on the ride.
I would believe that there
is more people going through the M&M's store than through TKTS.
Because not everyone has money to buy tickets for Broadway.
Or you have too many people in your crew.
And you're like, the M&M's store is free.
We can just walk through there.
Let's just walk through it.
Grab some M&M's and leave.
You're so right.
TKTS was a bad example.
That was just me sort of generic.
No, but in fact, I asked people that as a trivia question on the ride. And a lot of people guessed the TKTS was a bad example. That was just me, like, sort of generic. No, but in fact, I ask people that as a trivia question on the ride,
and a lot of people guess the TKTS steps.
Oh.
And I'm always like, no, because, yeah, it's not a thing.
It's just like you just don't do anything there,
but you can go and look at shit at the M&M store.
I try to think all the time if I was a tourist
what I would be most excited about about New York,
and I do think, like, if you didn't know anything more than Times Square,
you would go there. You know what I would be most excited about about New York. And I do think like if you didn't know anything more than Times Square, you would just go there.
You know what I mean?
And you'd be like, yeah, I guess I went to the M&M's store.
I mean, the one in Vegas is pretty good too.
Try it.
M&M's is distributed by Mars Chocolate North America.
I knew it.
Did you come to New York a lot growing up?
No.
Or was it a foreign place?
It was a foreign place.
Oh my gosh.
The amount Disney is connected to my life is crazy. I love it.
I live for it.
Because I didn't know that about you.
The first time I was in New York was to audition to be a big band jazz singer for Tokyo Disney.
Wow.
And this was during college.
It was after the college program was over.
And I was like
I already have a Disney inn
and I was like
on some email
listserv
where they sent out castings
for different shows
so I was like
this will be my
post grad move
I'll go to
go to Tokyo
for a year
and then
figure it out
after that
and
I took a Chinatown bus
and so I was at Charlottesville drove to DC took a Chinatown bus. And so I was at Charlottesville.
Drove to D.C.,
took a Chinatown bus
up to New York.
And then my mom
had a friend
who lived in Jersey.
And I took like a bus
to Jersey.
Stayed with her for the night.
Then went back into the city
in the morning.
That's horrible.
Ripley Career Studios.
Oh, wow.
We know it.
We love it.
We booked it. Oh, it. We booked it.
And,
uh,
Oh,
I was so green too.
I like had a black and white glossy of myself and then like eight by 11 sheet of paper for my resume paper clipped together.
And then there was a singing portion and a dancing portion.
And I was like,
I'll dress for the dancing portion, but cute.
So I had like, I don't know, like a pink t-shirt and some yoga pants.
But cute.
But cute.
But everyone else was dressed to the nines.
I didn't realize you dress up for the singing portion.
If they ask you back for dancing, then you change.
So everyone's like looking cute.
And I'm like, looking like I'm about to do yoga
you're dressed to move
and then
I went in there
and I was
I sang
what did I sing
it wasn't Disney
oh I'm sure
no
ironically it wasn't Disney
that's fine
that's probably a better choice
yeah
but I think I
sang Open Arms
yes
I'm so thankful for that.
That was like my audition song.
I was going to say, did you have like a song?
That was my song, yeah.
And of course the piano player was going slower than I wanted him to.
What a dredge that song is.
And yeah, it was fine.
And they were just like they were like thank you and i was like okay that's
all right but that's not how it's supposed to go because i pulled up put all my eggs in this
basket i'm sure i booked yeah and i left and had to like change my clothes i went to forever 21
in the area to change my clothes crying on the the phone with my dad, just like, I didn't get it.
Oh, my God.
And then, oh, God, it was such a rough journey.
Then I took a bus back to D.C.
I didn't look where I parked my car,
like, if the garage was 24 hours or not.
I just assumed it was 24 hours.
It wasn't.
So I was there at 1 in the morning,
couldn't get my car out.
I had to call my stepmom, my ex-stepmom, who lived in Odenton, Maryland,
and have her tell me how to get to the train at Union Station to take it to her place.
The ex-stepmom, even.
Yeah, I mean, who was still in my life.
But she didn't have to answer the phone at 1 in the morning.
Not obligated.
Yeah, I didn't tell her I was even going on this journey.
So she's like, why are you in D.C.?
And then I had to go back
the next morning to get my car.
It was like 140 bucks
because they charge you hourly.
And then I drove back to Charlottesville
and went to class.
So UVA, did you do improv?
I did, yeah.
I started a group.
Amuse-bouche.
Yeah.
You started the group.
I started the group
with Natasha Vaneplatt. Wow. That's some trivia. That's some group. Amuse-bouche. Yeah. You started the group. I started the group with Natasha Vayne Blatt.
Wow.
That's some trivia.
That's some trivia.
Sam Taggart was there.
And Sam Taggart was one of our first recruits.
Oh, incredible.
I mean, UVA, like, great breeding ground, I think.
We pump them out.
That's how you and Sam know each other.
You're friends from way back from going to school.
Oh, and you've been tight with Natasha for years.
Yeah.
Amazing.
Natasha Vayne Blatt is one of the most talented people
I think I've ever seen perform on stage.
I recently saw her do a character set,
and I was just like, this is...
Just every...
And I had seen her do a variation and iteration
of this set before,
but I could tell that she just plotted every laugh, tweaked
it, tightened it. It was
perfect. I love her. So did you guys do
sketch together too? Was it improv? Just improv.
Okay. And that's, I mean, because
so I was a year
older than her, and
but, you know, we're almost the same
age. Of course, of course, of course.
You guys are 17 and
16 now. Yep, yep.
Exactly. And I knew that
she had done improv since she was a
teenager because she was doing comedy sports in Richmond
before she even got to UVA. So she was like
already on it.
But like I auditioned for the
one improv team that was at our school,
the Weathermen.
W-H-E-T-E-J.
Okay. The Weathermen. Oh, come on. Weathermen? the weatherman W-H-E-T-E-J okay the weatherman
oh come on
weatherman
weatherman
that's stupid
you're really
thank god for a moose boosh
casting a wide net
okay so
we needed a moose boosh
audition for weatherman
and then
I feel so
I feel bad
when I do this
because I'm not trying
to shit on the weatherman
I'm sure they're fine
yeah
they're fine.
They're great.
But yeah, so I auditioned, didn't make the group.
Natasha auditioned three times, didn't make it.
And I was like, this is unjust.
This makes no sense because she's like the funniest.
She's the funniest.
Yes.
And so then I was like, you should start a group.
She's like, we should start a group.
And then we started a group.
That's beautiful.
Unbelievable. You know who did the same thing at NYU?
Zutty. Really? Zutty You know who did the same thing at NYU? Sudie.
Really? Sudie also didn't make the improv group at NYU
despite being Sudie.
Oh, she stood out to me.
And she had been taking, she had been doing
improv in Delaware
years prior.
So she had a lot of experience, was a real vet
and so much incredible natural talent
and she didn't make it.
And so they started a group at NYU called Captain Soldier.
Now you got people from that group on Broadway.
Oh, yes.
You got people.
Williams Town.
Williams Town, you know, doing the thing.
Oh, good.
They became like the theatrical improv group.
Ooh.
I would say.
You just have to have more variety.
Yeah.
You can't just have one.
No.
We, for a long time, had one sketch group at NYU and one improv group.
And it was like, there should be more.
And it felt gross for me during audition season to be like, we're so sorry.
But then we would tell people, we are not the only game in town.
You can take classes at UCB.
You can start your own group.
And then people did that.
And then it just was all the better.
I mean, the whole community was all the better for it.
Did that define your college
experience a little bit?
Truly. And I think
I am very appreciative about
how UVA
kind of fostered a student-run
environment. They're like, if you
see a void, you can fill it. That's how I felt
anyway. And
I did that. It was like oh i want
another improv group started improv group i revived like a all black theater company i like there was
like so many things that i was just able to like do because i was like oh now that i did it once
yeah i know how to do that now and kind of all you need when you quote unquote start out is just like that like seed crystal thing of just being like, oh, I can actually do this and not be, you know, a wreck at the end.
Yeah.
And it doesn't hurt to have people next to you that actually hold you accountable for that.
Like, I'm sure like having Natasha there helped as well because it's like, no, we want this.
It's like, I'm not the only person that wants this.
Yeah.
I don't think I would have done it by myself. Yeah. I wouldn't have. Yeah. But because she was there, we want this. It's like, I'm not the only person that wants this. Yeah, I don't think I would have done it by myself.
I wouldn't have.
But because she was there, I felt secure.
That's great.
So were the audiences, did the college campus turn out for the shows?
They did, yeah.
I'm sure.
At first it was a little weird because it was like, who are these people?
Who is a booze booth?
Yeah, what's this new thing?
And then we tried to do shows
with the weathermen
like
like
make it a joint thing
yeah like
oh it's fine
that we're all here together
but there was a little bit of
like a
I love it
there always is
new kids tension
yes
but then we didn't need to
then we started getting
our own audiences
on our own
what
the spinoff
and then Sam
started like
a sketch group
out of that.
Like other things
started spawning
from the group.
Yeah, yeah.
And now I think
there's a ton of comedy
at UVA.
Yeah.
Did you guys travel
as a group?
I don't,
we did.
We went to
Skidmore?
No.
What?
We went to some festival.
I want to,
oh,
we went to the
North Carolina Comedy Arts Festival.
Oh, yes.
Famous.
We did do that.
What's that theater there called?
Uh, Theater 99, no.
DSI.
DSI.
DSI.
Theater 99 is in South Carolina.
It's in Charlotte.
No, no, Charlotte.
Charleston.
Charleston.
Sorry, oh my God.
Charlottesville, Charleston, all these.
I was in Charlottesville and Charlotte in the same day because I was flying back and forth.
I was like, the South is confusing.
And you didn't turn to sand?
I didn't turn to sand.
Anyway.
I feel like there was somewhere else we went to.
But yeah, we did all the festival classes
and then we would take notes and then come back together
and share what we learned with each other.
How did we get better?
It was actually really cool.
I mean, we truly were just teaching ourselves what to do
and we would watch ASCAP videos and UCB stuff.
Yeah.
And just, like, really take turns being like, well, I know this.
I want to do this.
Yes.
Teach stuff.
So then you moved to New York.
And what I want to ask you is I want to ask about the origins of Doppelganger.
Yeah.
Because when I was a student at NYU and first taking classes, Doppelganger was it.
You guys were it.
So can you talk a little bit about Doppelganger?
When I moved to New York, it was in 2009, and I was taking classes very quickly because I fell in hard.
And then I met Nicole and Keisha through the diversity program at UCB.
And we would have meetups and pizza parties and jams and stuff.
This is Nicole Byer and Keisha Zahlar.
Yeah.
Yes.
And who are also two black female improvisers.
And we all auditioned for Herald Night.
And you have to take up to 401 401 get passed and then audition um the spring of i guess
2010 none of us made it and and i had already been performing with nicole separately from keisha
but but with both kind of by accident actually because I had another – one person from my improv group in college moved to New York before I did.
And he was, like, already – he was, like, advanced already.
So he was, like, here's what you do.
You find people you like early on in your classes and keep them with you and then create a group.
That's going to be us.
Yeah.
And in my 201 and 301 classes, there was this one girl who I really, really liked, but I didn't like
anybody else.
So I just held on to her and I was like, well, what if we just start just the two of us and
then if we want more people, we'll add more people.
And we would have these like insane long practices where we had no coach just in my living room
with a camera facing us and we would record it and then watch it back.
We were insane.
I love that.
That is insane. It's insane. But it's also like once you get past that, it's like, okay, well, nothing
will faze you.
If you can watch yourself do uncoached improv in your living room and get through that,
then you can do anything.
We were just obsessed.
And then we watched TJ Miller and Dave.
Oh, my God. What's his last name? TJ and Dave. TJ and Dave.J. Miller and Dave. Oh my God, what's this last name?
T.J. and Dave.
T.J. and Dave.
Yes.
We watched their movie that they have.
Yeah.
And then we watched them live
whenever they came to the Barrow Street Theater.
Those are such good shows.
Yeah, we were obsessed.
Yeah, you were obsessed with improv.
And with two-person improv in particular and then
we did a show that nicole's improv group was hosting at i can't remember what the venue was
and uh my partner flaked and i can't remember what the reason was but she just couldn't make it
and so i told nicole and she's like oh well i have been in a jam with you before let's i can
just perform with you.
And so we did it, and it was great.
And it was kind of like a date where we were like,
do you want to do this again sometime?
Oh, my God.
That is so Abbott and Costello of you guys.
You know that's how they met.
Oh, no, I didn't know that.
Yeah.
Their partners didn't show up, and they jumped on stage together.
Yeah.
And then the exact same thing happened with Keisha's group,
because she was hosting a show.
And then my partner was supposed to come,
and she was like, sorry, I can't. And then I was like then my partner was supposed to come and she was like,
sorry, I can't.
And then I was like,
Keisha, this thing.
And she was like,
oh, I'll just do it with you.
We did it.
It was great.
So then the two of us,
I was having two,
I had two separate groups going.
Oh, wow.
And then that partner
moved to LA
and like we stopped
performing together.
But, you know,
I actually am thankful
because it made me
meet these two
incredible performers.
And then after we all found out that we didn't make Harold Night, both of them at the same time in separate emails were like, all right, we need to work harder.
We're going to have our own show.
We're going to kick ass.
And I was like, this is so wonderful.
I cannot split my time two ways.
What if we try to make a threesome?
Let's bring it all together.
And so we had a show at the
creek booked i think maybe me and keisha had it booked already and i was like come on nicole like
you'll just jump in we never practiced or rehearsed we just like did a show together like let's just
see how it goes and it was magical yes and we were like this is it and then that was it and then we
just like we rehearsed all the time ashley Ashley Ward was our coach for a long time.
Amazing, Ashley Ward.
Amazing, yeah.
And yeah, we just like started going
to cage match tournaments and like,
and performing and beating a lot of groups.
Like I was in a 401 class and Brandon Gardner
was my teacher and was in one of the groups
that we beat.
Yes, that is a famous story. I love that. I love that story. And then wasn't, and like for me, like teacher and was in one of the groups that we beat. Yes, that is a famous story.
I love that.
I love that story.
And then wasn't,
and like for me,
like the moment was just like,
well, Amy Poehler saw them
and thought that they should be on Herald
or whatever.
Like there was just a moment
where it all sort of came to a,
like a head and like,
it was just like the momentum
had built up so much
that it was just like,
yeah, like get these people.
They were the talk of the town.
They were the talk of the town.
That's how, I mean,
SNL found out about us because Anthony King, who was the AD at the time,
called them up and was like, hey, here are these funny ladies who are consistently on our stage.
You should come see them.
Yeah.
And one of the producers came to one of our shows where we did really well and was like,
you guys should send tapes and packets.
Yes.
And so we did that.
And we were so green, had no idea what we're doing absolutely um but we did them and then i think we did that
for a couple years and then nicole went in to test um like 2013 or something and then uh the whole
you know lack of diversity blog right thing took over at the end of that year and then I uh tested the end of like December of 2013
and they got cast January 2014 so that was a very quick process yeah so that that that must
have been kind of insane from like getting like oh they saw you and they liked you submit a packet
oh all of a sudden it's the audition all of of a sudden, oh my God. Well, that part wasn't that quick. It was like a few years in between that.
And me, like the whole,
the last chunk of me getting on the show was very quick.
But like there were a couple years
where we're just submitting stuff over the summer
like everyone else does.
Yeah.
And being like, yeah, probably not.
But it's in the atmosphere.
Bye.
I mean, and the last time I was submitting was,
I was like, this is going to be the last time.
Like I was like, if it's not this year it's not gonna happen
and I remember putting together
a practice tape to send to my manager
and be like let's just prepare
for next summer when they usually do it
and I was like give me notes
and let me know what you think
and this was maybe like I don't know
November or something
and they were like can you
can we send this to them
because they need it now.
They're looking for a black girl right now.
And I was like,
oh, sure.
I don't think it's ready, but okay.
It was a practice tape.
I mean, okay, I guess.
And then we did a showcase
maybe that week or the next week
that I felt very good about.
At the pit, right?
At the pit, yeah.
I remember they emailed out there
and were like,
you need to come support.
Yeah, we need bodies to fill the seats.
Yes, I remember that.
And then maybe that week or the next week we did the test.
And I remember Leslie Jones was before me and I couldn't hear how much they were laughing.
And I was like, that's cool.
I'm good.
I'm good.
But I kind of blacked out in that performance. I would good I'm good yeah and then but I like
I did that
I kind of blacked out
in that performance
I would imagine
oh my god
but I left feeling like
that's the best I've ever
done anything
yes
and I was like
if they want it
that's great
if not
that's on them
and that's like
such a nice feeling
to be like
the best
I can't even think
of a thing to fix
yeah I was like
that's
that is the best
I could have done
wow
and it paid off
yes
oh my god oh I love that so does does he call you on the phone I was like, that is the best I could have done. Wow. And it paid off. Yes. Oh, my God.
Oh, I love that.
So does he call you on the phone?
I did get a call on the phone, yeah.
Wow.
That's huge.
That's going to be like, what?
Yeah.
It was like, they let me know.
They said that they would let me know before Christmas break.
They didn't.
Ah.
They didn't.
So then you think, oh, OK, well, it's not a thing.
Well, I knew they didn't pick anyone because't so then you think oh okay well it's not a thing well I knew they didn't pick anyone
because I hadn't heard anything
so I was like
just waiting
also I was trying to move
to LA at this time
I remember this
you had moved
and you had actually moved
and then you had to
come right back
yeah I had
you almost had
well I had an apartment
in LA
and I was getting rid of stuff
I was looking for cars
and that
but I didn't let go
of my New York apartment
because I was like I don't know I don looking for cars. But I didn't let go of my New York apartment because I was like, I don't know.
I don't know.
But I already put down a deposit and stuff
on this other place.
And it was annoying people who were living there
because they were like,
do we need to find a new roommate?
And I was like, I legit don't know.
Don't ask me again.
You're stressing me out.
Yeah, I was like, I know you're stressed,
but I am very stressed right now.
Yeah, I'm probably more stressed than you are.
Wait, now I'm remembering the first time I met you was in Story Pirates training.
Oh, yeah.
We did.
So Shira and I originated the story called 19.
Yes.
We did.
Oh, my God.
An amazing story.
Which is about a boy whose birthday is in 19 days.
And that's it. Yeah. And there's a dance. Yeah, in 19 days. And that's it.
Yeah.
And there's a dance.
Yeah.
Very easy dance.
A very easy dance.
It's just a countdown from 19 to.
Was his name his boy?
I think his name was.
What's his name?
Oh, I don't remember.
Or I was like, I'm blank.
I'm a boy.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That was like a very story parts thing.
It's like, hi, I'm a boy.
And it's going to be my birthday in 19 days.
Oh, my God.
And then it heightened to like the Secret Service coming out.
I don't know.
Crazy.
Kids' minds.
I was looking forward to Story Pirates so I could do it in LA and have a thing and meet
people and make a little bit of money.
Yeah.
And you got swept up?
I got swept up.
Other things just happened.
Unfortunately.
Darling.
I just remember the euphoria when you got cast
oh man
it was just
so so amazing
and I mean like
I mean after all this
you should be so proud
thank you so much
I am proud
you should be
it's
yeah
it was so
you were so fucking good
it was so cool to see
I mean I have to say
like
there's that
when it was announced
that you were the one
it was like
everyone you spoke to
was like
yes
so excited
and happy for you
because we all looked up to you
for so long
I mean like
like
Doppelganger was it
it was it
honestly
option the rights
to a Doppelganger movie
I would watch that
I'd rather that
than Don't Think Twice
oh well come on
I like Don't Think Twice
I did it
but I would
maybe
maybe rather
you don't have to say anything so sheer you don't have to incriminate. I didn't. But I would... Maybe, maybe rather. You don't have to say anything,
so share.
You don't have to incriminate yourself.
I didn't like it.
I thought it painted the community
in a really ugly way.
I liked it just fine.
I would rather watch
a doppelganger movie.
Same.
There you go.
An original cast.
Maybe, come on.
Why not?
Maybe, why not?
It's a pretty great narrative.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I'll talk to the girls about it.
Talk to the girls.
Talk to the girls.
Talk to the girls.
The girls were around. In fact, Kisha Zolar. Wait, what are you talking about? Kisha Zolar. I'll talk to the girls about it. Talk to the girls. Talk to the girls. Talk to the girls. The girls are around.
In fact,
Keisha Zolar.
Wait,
what are you talking about?
Keisha Zolar.
I was,
I,
Forever Dog Sister.
Forever Dog Sister,
I was gonna,
I was gonna drop a hint
about something Keisha
might be involved in soon.
Okay,
well that's enough.
But that's all I can say about that.
Hot Producer Alex
is giving us a look.
He's saying no.
Hot Producer Alex.
Oh man,
you know who's not here?
Hot Producer Joe
to steam up
the place but we've got we've got hot engineer ronnie here hot engineer ronnie and let me say
i apologize to sashir when she came in because usually he's pumping the good jams don't apologize
no i apologize ronnie doesn't have to play the music every time he does he does oh my god and
i would say carly raye Jepsen's usually playing
Do You Like the New Lord?
You do.
He says yes.
Oh wait,
you're enjoying the new Lord?
I am enjoying it, yes.
It's very good.
Ronnie,
what do both of you,
Ronnie and Sasheer,
what do both of you think
about the new SZA?
Have you listened to SZA?
Yes.
So good.
I haven't heard this.
So good.
Yeah.
I was gonna have that on.
Oh my God.
Oh man.
Hot Engineer Ronnie
nails it every time.
He was gonna have that on.
It's okay.
It's okay. But we know what he would've played. Yeah Engineer Ronnie nails it every time. He was going to have that on. It's okay. It's okay.
But we know what he would have played.
Yeah.
Gagging for Lorde.
Also.
Haim.
Haim.
Yeah.
Haim.
Obsessed.
So good.
And really wasn't obsessed with their first album.
I thought it was like good.
I was like, yeah, this is a good band.
Uh-huh.
Something's a long forgotten.
Wow.
When they released that video
and they were just walking on the street,
have you seen the video for this one yet?
I haven't, no.
You guys, culture of the week.
The music video for Want You Back by Haim.
It's just honestly,
it's three girls walking down a street,
which is all I ever need.
It's pretty great.
And with some-
Literally.
They take out,
it's what they don't do
that's special
just it'll make sense
when you watch it
I'm pointing to him
thank you
with the knowledge
of a true culturista
and little of your love
is their other single
yes
and also rule number 50
of culture
it's what they don't do
that makes it
that's it
it's what they don't do
that makes it it's what they don't do that makes it.
It's what they don't do that makes it.
Oh my God.
I think it's time.
I think it's time for...
I don't think so, honey.
Okay.
Okay, so this is, as you know,
the pièce de ressortance of our show.
Right, though, Beau?
Right, though.
And we have a true cultarista who slayed it the first time.
Oh, she did.
So I'm excited to see what she brings.
Now, are you prepared?
Are you prepared?
I kind of touched on this earlier, so I feel
like the novelty of the
discussion will be worn off a little bit.
I'm going to switch gears. I love a
progression. Okay, do you. Okay, but
how about you go first? I would love to go first.
Okay, so do you want me to set the time for you? So I don't think so, honey.
As you may or may not know
is our one minute to rail against
culture. I'm very
excited about the future of I Don't Think So
Honey. Whatever could you
be talking about? I don't know what I'm talking about
but soon. Get ready to
get online like you're
buying tickets to a Beyonce concert
but maybe buying tickets to something else.
How producer Alex is like shut up. No, he's fine tickets to something else. Hopper-ducer Alex is like, shut up.
No, he's fine.
You moron.
This is Matt Rogers.
I don't think so, honey.
Time starts now.
I don't think so, honey.
Chris Harrison.
Because let me tell you something.
I'm watching The Bachelorette,
and you don't host.
You barely come out.
You're never on the show.
If you're ever on that show,
it's to say,
Rachel, how are you?
Well, I understand. Welcome to the next room.
And then everyone is always talking about you like you're going to be the one to come in and fix
things. Like, well, tell Chris how you feel.
Bitch, you are a receptacle for nothing.
And I can see in your eyes
there's nothing there. And also, Chris,
I don't think so, honey, because I know who you really
are. Because I've met you, Chris
Harrison, and you shook my hand like Donald Trump. I don't think so honey because I know who you really are 30 seconds because I've met you Chris Harrison
and you
shook my hand
like Donald Trump
you tried to assert
dominance over me
but with the pull
Chris Harrison
I don't think so honey
it's on TV
you are not
hosting that show
you're getting a check
15 seconds
everyone that tells me
they love Chris Harrison
they have a crush
on Chris Harrison
they love him
I'm like why
why
what is it about him you are like the basic girls on that show Chris Harrison. They have a crush on Chris Harrison. They love him. I'm like, why? Why?
What is it about him? You are like the basic girls on that show.
Just kidding. I love Rachel Lindsay. Oh my god.
I'm obsessed. She's amazing.
Hashtag Team
Brian! Okay.
Then that's one minute. Hashtag Team Brian. All I'm saying
is, look, you know, you want to see
hosting? Watch RuPaul's Drag Race.
There you go. You want to see hosting? Watch Survivor. You want to see hosting watch rupaul's drag race there you go you want to see hosting watch survivor yeah you want to see hosting watch so you think you can dance those
are your three those are your three miss kat dealy is slaying it on that show honestly give
me some nick cannon i love it when nick cannon hosts i'm not a nick cannon fan okay you're your
team he smells like crazy to me okay Okay. All right. That's fair.
All right.
But that's my I Don't Think So Honey
and do I watch The Bachelorette?
No.
But you played
an amazing Rachel Lindsay.
Thank you very much.
I watched enough
Oh my God, yes.
I love that sketch.
I love that sketch.
She's amazing.
She's an icon.
She seems just way better
than everybody on the show.
She's so dope.
She is really good.
No one's really deserving of her time.
I am buying into it so much because I love her.
What's the deal with the puppet?
Okay.
The puppet's gone.
First of all, the guy is still in.
No.
No, the guy is still in, Adam.
He brought like a little like crazy, like one of those scary dolls.
Yeah.
And the guy is still in.
He's in the top six. Oh my God. Or seven. They were like, you got to those scary dolls. Yes. And the guy is still in. He's in the top six.
Oh my God.
Or seven.
But they were like,
you gotta get rid of the puppet.
No, the puppet still makes a cameo appearance
every now and then.
They love the puppet.
The producers love the puppet.
They give him his own lower third.
They give him his own confessionals.
It's nuts.
Right now, there's weird.
Remaining in the show,
remaining in the show is one guy who has the puppet
and one guy who came in in like like, a full, like, mask.
Wait, who is this?
Matt is his name.
Matt, okay.
He came in and he had, like, a full, like, mask on and that was his, like, entrance.
Is, um, ooh, is the guy, is the guy who said, um, once I go black, I can't go back.
Yes, he's still there.
But he's, like, the fan favorite.
But he's actually literally so good and I think he's gonna be he's still there but he's like the fan favorite but he's actually literally
so good and I think he's gonna be the next
bachelor his name's Dean you could tell
they made him say that I know
you could 100% tell they made him say that
and like and he's gorgeous and he's gorgeous
he seems really nice so cute
and so sweet and so nice and he is like
I was talking to my sister about this
today because I'm fully in bachelor nation
now I texted her and I was like,
he is the only one that's a star like she is.
I can see a couple of the other guys winning
because they have better chemistry
and they're like, whatever.
But this guy is like, he's a brand.
Dean is like a brand.
He's so adorable.
And that's what you have to have for The Bachelor.
But then she told me,
sometimes they pick the worst people ever
to be The Bachelor.
Like Juan Pablo.
Sure.
Like this one guy, Juan Pablo.
Anyway.
Anyway.
I think I'm ready
and I'm gonna,
I don't think so.
You'll see.
It's a weird one.
But it's a weird one.
Alright, so it's a little bit
of a weird one
and we prefaced it.
This is I Don't Think So Honey,
Bo and Yang,
and time starts now.
I Don't Think So Honey,
my feelings,
my ambivalent feelings
on The Beguiled.
I saw it last week.
I went into it thinking I was going to be gagged for it.
And you know what?
For the most part, I was.
But that ending, I'm not going to spoil anything,
but it is a weird, bizarre ending that I don't think was very earned.
The pacing gets a little thrown off.
There is literally, you know what?
I'm not going to say this.
I'm just going to say there's a Chekhov's gun, figuratively or literally, you know what, I'm not gonna say this. I'm just gonna say there's a Chekhov's gun, figuratively
or literally, that
may or may not be actually used
in a Chekhovian sense,
if that makes sense. I don't think so, honey.
I thought I was gonna love this movie, and now the fact
that I don't love a Sofia Coppola movie is
really fucking with me. I don't think so, honey.
My feelings, this is
throttling me into an identity crisis that I did
not ask for. I did not think The Beguiled would throw me into this tizzy.
I wish I had seen Baby Driver instead first and maybe been either loved it so much or hated it as a contrarian opinion and then went to go see The Beguiled.
Five seconds.
To sort of have a better cinematic texture to my understanding.
I don't think so many of my feelings on The Beguiled.
One minute.
Okay.
Wow.
All right.
So I'm seeing it tonight.
Okay.
Tell me what you think.
Text me after.
Susie and Peter and Kelly and I are going.
Bam?
We're going to Angelica.
Oh, great.
And I'm very excited for this.
I've watched the trailer more than I should.
Here's what I'll say.
Performances are great.
Nicole, Kirsten, what's your face?
Love them.
Ella.
Ella.
Ella's.
Ella's.
Ella's. I's. Ella's.
I'm going to say it now.
The best comedic performance of the year.
She's so fucking funny in this movie.
Is she supposed to be?
Well, kind of because she like bats her eyes in such a funny way at Colin Farrell.
That's all I'll say.
It's hilarious.
I can't wait.
When they cut to Elle Fanning, she looks fucking hysterical.
Everyone in the theater was cracking up.
Am I going to gasp and scream? You're going to gasp and scream and probably laugh. Oh my God, I'm't wait. She looks fucking hysterical. Everyone in the theater was cracking up. Am I going to gasp and scream?
You're going to gasp and scream and probably laugh.
Oh my God, I'm so excited.
Nicole Kidman, and this was in the trailer,
her line of get me the whatever.
Get me the ax.
The chloroform.
Get me the chloroform.
And she has one line.
Can I say it?
No, don't spoil.
She has a line right after that
that I don't think they include in the trailer
that everyone in the theater at BAM guffawed at.
Do not say it.
Do not say it.
I want the experience
of Nicole
in a southern accent
serving me a comedic line.
Oh, she nails
the southern accent
by the way.
Anyway.
We talked about this.
A lot of people
have problems
with her accent
in Big Little Lies
because it's harder
to do like
straight up
American accent
than it is
for someone
who's foreign
to do like
a real southern accent.
To go from Australian to southern is
an easy jump. That's what they say.
That's what they say. Anyway. Little known
language fact. Yes. Actually, you know what?
I liked the guy I'll
say the most part. But just go see it.
Go see it. I'm going.
Be the judge. I love it. Yeah. Anyway.
That's mine. Sashir, are you ready? It's time.
Okay. It's time for Sashir Zameda.
I don't think so, honey.
Time starts now.
I don't think so, honey.
Horse cops.
Has anyone done this?
No.
No.
What are you doing?
Why are you riding a horse?
Who do you think you're chasing?
We don't have cowboys anymore.
We're not playing cowboys and Indians anymore.
We are all adults with cars and bicycles and segways and hoverboards.
You need to keep up with the times.
What are you doing on that horse?
I was at the beach the other day, saw a horse cop on the sand.
That's not a place for horses.
Put them in the grass or something. Also, a horse
pooped on the street
and no one cleaned it up. If you're going to
have a horse, you have to have
a bucket with you. You have to be prepared
to sweep up the poop
because that's disgusting.
We don't have cars that poop everywhere.
We don't have to clean up our mess.
You do, though, and I don't appreciate it.
Who are you chasing with that horse? Five seconds.
You need to put the horse in a stable and make it enjoy nature instead of putting it on the street and not actually using it for its full potential.
Oh, that's not a kid.
One minute.
Wow.
That is Hall of Fame.
That is one of those ones where you're like, yeah, fuck those people.
Why?
Why?
That is an animal.
I walked by them and I looked into
the horse's eye and I said, I'm so
sorry. Yes.
Yes. And guess what? You do need to
clean up after them because that shit doesn't smell good.
It's shit. It's shit.
If it was a dog, you'd be cleaning it up.
Yes, and they take huge
shit. Smelly, fragrant
traffic accident shits.
Oh my God. it truly was like
near where the food
was
near Jacob Rees
they're always at
Jacob Rees
yeah and there was
like a huge plop
of poop
in front of like
the shops
and it was like
whose responsibility
is it to clean this
yes
no one's
no one's
it's just gonna
disintegrate
that's nuts
I just went
we had Fort Tilden
yesterday
and there was a horse
on the beach walking,
and I was like, first of all, this is so for show.
Yes.
It's not necessary.
Second of all, what if that thing shits?
Yes.
You can't not think about it.
And who are you chasing?
Who are you chasing?
If someone's running on foot, you don't need a horse.
Nope.
If it's just an elevation thing, they want to be high up.
To see things, maybe?
I don't know, but that's still not, that doesn't justify it.
It's crazy that in 2017, they're like, no, we still need to own horses.
Oh my God.
Do you have a bit about this in your stand up?
No.
Please work that.
This is a huge issue.
This will be the second time that Alaska, I don't think so honey, became a full bit.
And you know what else it is.
This will be my open mic arena. I'll just come and do some, I don't think so honey became a full bit and you know this will be my open mic
I'll just come and
do some I don't
think so honey
there you go
but I agree
until we until
our society devolves
to a place where
there are bandits
on horses
oh yeah
and I believe we
will get there
I don't want to
see them now
wow
oh and the
horses if you're
someone who thinks
that dogs shouldn't
belong in the city
because they're trapped or whatever,
same fucking thing goes for horses.
Extrapolate them.
And I'm sure that's so much money.
Oh, yeah.
To put them in a stable somewhere, I'm sure, upstate or something.
They're not just chilling in a garage.
They must be in a stable somewhere.
Yeah, you're right.
And then you have to train cops to ride horses.
That's more of our money
going to something
that does not get used.
God.
I would love
someone that has
intel on this
to contact us
and let us know
what's up with these horses
because you've exposed
a lot of questions.
Yeah.
And maybe this,
this podcast
is where we bring it down.
I smell another petition. Change.org. Yes. Change.org. You will see us on Change podcast is where we bring it down. I smell another petition.
Change.org.
Yes.
Change.org.
You will see us on change.org where we will continue to change the world.
Thank God.
As Sasha Velour said, let's change the motherfucking world.
Let's use all this beauty.
I'm pointing to Bowen.
Thank you.
Like Sasha pointed to RuPaul.
Uh-huh.
And change the motherfucking world.
Beautiful.
On change.org.
On change.org.
Oh my God. This was such a fun change.org. On change.org. Oh my God.
This was such a fun episode.
This was party time.
This was party time.
Go check out Party Time at the Bell House.
July 16th.
Yes.
Oh my God.
As I foretold,
this was an amazing episode.
Oh my God.
You are a seer.
You were right.
I'm a seer.
You have the oracle in you.
Yes, absolutely.
So Shira, thank you so much
We love you
This was so amazing
Guys I'm Matt Rogers
I'm Bowen Yang
Bye
Forever
Dog
This has been a Forever Dog production
Executive produced by Joe Cilio
Alex Ramsey and and Brett Bohm.
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