Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang - "Sodomy Wins" (w/ Scott Thompson)

Episode Date: September 5, 2018

Scott Thompson (The Kids In The Hall) has the face of a Windsor and simply MUST play the Queen. And he will play the Queen SO WELL that you'll forget that Claire Foy even exists!Scott is a true living legend and we were thrilled to have him on the podcast when he was in NYC performing his one-man show, "Après le déluge: The Buddy Cole Monologues." Aside from his iconic character, Matt & Bowen talk with him about being an openly gay comedian in the 80s & 90s, characters, the influence of Carol Burnett, Fantasy (Dune, Narnia, Lord Of The Rings), the original sin, Troye Sivan's "Bloom," and so much more!Plus, Matt & Bowen ask the question: what if Sarah Jessica Parker dropped the J?---MERCH! MERCH! GET YOUR LAS CULTURISTAS MERCH!https://www.teepublic.com/stores/las-culturistasLAS CULTURISTAS HAS A PATREON! For $5/month, you get exclusive access to WEEKLY Patreon-ONLY Las Culturistas content!!https://www.patreon.com/lasculturistasSUBSCRIBE ON APPLE PODCASTS TODAY!CONNECT W/ LAS CULTURISTAS ON FACEBOOK & TWITTER for the best in "I Don't Think So, Honey" action, updates on live shows, conversations with the Las Culturistas community, and behind-the scenes photos/videos:www.facebook.com/lasculturistastwitter.com/lasculturistasLAS CULTURISTAS IS A FOREVER DOG PODCASThttp://foreverdogproductions.com/fdpn/podcasts/las-culturistas/ Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Dog Look, man. Oh, I see. Wow. forever dog look man oh i see my oh my bowen look over there wow is that culture yes las culturistas ding dong las culturistas calling and look at us recording on sunday the lord's day i asked hpj hot producer joe said, do you normally come in on Sundays? He goes, yeah, basically. You come in every day, don't you? I,

oh my God. We gotta, we gotta do like a little, I don't know, lifestyle clinic with, with Joe, because he's gotta like claim the time for himself and not be this workaholic. Maybe we need to do a whole Patreon series,

which is the life of Joe, HPJ, and just really so the listeners can really get to see a glimpse behind the man behind the hot facade. And I want to say your desk looks fucking incredible. Oh, it's a

Marie Kondo dream. You cleaned that desk. You got on your hands and knees, didn't you? Is that a fridge down there? I haven't even seen that desk. You got on your hands and knees, didn't you? Is that a fridge down there? I haven't even seen that fridge. Fridge has been there. Fridge has been there all along. But you couldn't see with all the clutter.

Oh, well. Well, first of all, Terry Abel of New York Magazine loves hot producer content. This is hot producer content right here. But he's saying nothing. But he's saying nothing. It's okay.

But just everyone, if you want to give joe a little bit of um i don't know advice on on how to sort of like just just just self-care maybe i don't know we're in this moment now he doesn't need advice he's got a thing in front of him that separates papers what is that it's it's a it's a letter separate well that's incredible i've never seen anything like this letter separator separates one letter from all the other ones unbelievable joe that is the function well you're a maniac we have um i we have like a really really really honorable it's a big day it's a big day it's a

big day he's laughing he's chuckling chuckling along and it's honorable i like what else would you say honorable the esteemem you have it sounds just like I'm an ex prime minister or a kung fu master sure but we attach the honorifics or you know what judge

you do attach an honorific yes attach honorifics and here's the thing I was going to say two things it's a big day it's a big day for several reasons

one we have this guest yes two we're going to go see this guest's show later on yes now say the title because i'm stupid and can't oh bitch after you please say it you got it it's pretty close yeah that's pretty good i have to believe in myself

before the part that's true but how many times did i get it wrong before i got it right 18 18 yeah 18 was the number well d-Suite D-Suite D-Suite D-Suite I also want to say one thing I want to brag about my best friend yeah yeah my best friend

Bowen Yang is doing the monologues at ASCOT tonight oh I'm very I'm very excited it's fun and then we're gonna do that and then we're gonna go say après la deluge

après la deluge the buddy cool monologues at Joe's Pub he just finished a great run of shows there this summer hopefully it comes back but he's he's an old Joe's Pub res old Joe's Pub. He just finished a great run of shows there this summer. Hopefully it comes back, but he's an old Joe's

Pub res. Old Joe's Pub ho. Joe's Pub. Joe Hoa. Yes, honey. God, he's just really kind of phenomenal. He's an honorable

sketch comedy legend. Let's just go ahead and say that from the kids in the hall. From kids in the hall. And, you know, I would say, we'll talk about this. You and I wouldn't be doing any of what we would be doing without him. I truly believe this. Not without this honorable one right here. Not without this honorable one.

I can tell you. And he's also celebrating the re-release of his book, Buddy Babylon, the autobiography. I love the re-release. Yes, Buddy Babylon, the autobiography of Buddy Cole. You know the release went well when there's a re-release. When there's a re-release. I think they did it at Stonewall. That's actually rule of culture number six.

You know the release went well when there's a re-release. Absolutely. And please check out his album, Not a Fan. It is our honor to welcome the honorable Scott Thompson. Thank you very much. It's an honor to be here. Oh, Jesus. It really an honor to be here Oh Jesus It really is

Now here's the thing So look Growing up I had like Saturday Night Live And Mad TV Right I didn't really have

Kids in the hall In America That wasn't really part of Like my My like I guess Media diet Would you call it But I've become

Familiar with it recently And I have to say I'm kind of happy I didn't grow up with it Because I think I'd be overwhelmed right now. Really? Yeah, I think I would. I think I really would. I think you're definitely honorable.

Thank you very much. Scott is, I mean, Scott is just, is, I don't know, just accept this. He is a legend. I is. I just is. I is. I is. He is what he is. I just is. I is. I just is. You is what you is. And, you know, it's just, just, just being

able to just, I don't know, see Buddy Cole sort of unfold and sort of develop over time during a time of your Andrew Dice Clays and your Eddie Murphys just saying like horrendous things during the Spectre of AIDS. Like, I don't know. It's, it's, it is, it is a significant sort of little locus

in queer comedy, I think. So, I don't know. It know it's it's it is an honor to have you um you're so so you're in town and then are you going back to la after this yes i am great great or do you split your time between what la and no toronto i lived in toronto for years and then i went moved back uh about a year and a half ago just before trump was elected i went oh it's gonna get hot down there get out of here this is gonna be fun yeah i think i'm needed so like you know i I mean like the Batman sequel went out

and I went I'm going back wow what's the the BC was the BC they need Buddy Cole like a martini glass

in the sky exactly it's the silver dollar like yes I think yes so now

do you think that Buddy has kind of stayed the same yes yeah I mean the whole one of the premises of the show? It's 25 years. It's all about, it's 23 years.

It's monologues written from the end of The Kids in the Hall, Apparel de Luge. De Luge refers to The Kids in the Hall, which means flood, de luge. So it's the flood. And then it's afterwards, when Buddy was like tossed into the wilderness. And so I kept writing and I've always performed.

But, you know, so they're like monologues. So nothing's ever been on television. But the whole premise is the world changes drastically all the way around him. But he doesn't budge an inch. And people say, how does Buddy change? And I go, none.

Why would a perfect character change? He was actualized from the job. Yeah, and even like, and also in terms of comedy, like it's almost like a hard and fast ruling comedy that comic characters don't really change. They don't really learn. And that's part of what makes them so joyful to watch because human beings love to see people

make the same mistakes over and over again. Or with Buddy, they just love to see people make the same mistakes over and over again. Or with Buddy, they just love to see Buddy make the right choice over and over again. But no, he hasn't. I look different, but the clothes are the same. He still wears this. He found a timeless fashion, and he's stuck to it. Does he smoke still? No, but there's a point in the show

when in 1998, when Buddy gets his AIDS. When Buddy gets the gay bar. Yeah. He stops smoking. But that was back before. But there is a period in the show when Buddy takes up,

in 1998, Buddy tests negative for AIDS. And he decides, well, then I might as well start smoking again. So I do start smoking again in the show. And then I quit again on stage. Were you involved? let's start smoking again so so i do start smoking again in the show then i then i take

and then i quit again on great on stage were you involved heavily in the buddy fashions very okay so that was that came from you yeah all right every every single monologue had to have an outfit that was a kind of a visual equivalent of what he was speaking about. So there were always signifiers in the outfits. I mean, you know, I tried to basically say, you know, the basic shape of Buddy is, you know, the pants and the shoes. No socks. He can't wear socks. Right.

You know, and the jacket, the smoking jacket. But we went really far. And maybe in a way we kind of went too far in some some of the outfits like i mean there was one modeled on the um girl in the back of export a cigarettes that was a great look and then there was one where he had his nipples cut the nipple nipple cut out yeah i was always looking for an excuse to showcase buddy's nips that came from you early yes yes but i worked very very careful uh closely with hillary corbett who was our costume designer and i think the best thing we ever made together uh what she ever made

was the buddy cole outfit um girls of summer when he when he becomes the coach of the lesbians um softball yes once again there was nipple cut sure sure sure sure but that was a great i mean yes so we were very involved and that's one of the things I like to do with this show once we put it into the shop for a few months I want to give it a bit more like I give it

some visual excitement yeah it has visual excitement but I'd like to I'd like it to subtly change for each monologue because there's 10 monologues

and maybe have little things on the outfits to kind of reflect the time around him because looking at him you're going to go, what the fuck year are we in? Yeah, I know, exactly.

It's like, it's the year timeless. It's the year timeless. Isn't it crazy? Because I was watching a bunch of them again today and I was just like, you could see guys like thinking nothing of it wearing these things. I know. The style really does hold up.

It is timeless. And also just like the kind of like camp of it, like the monologue that you did in the cemetery. And you had this sort of vampiric. And the incredible hair. Oh, incredible. And you look just like an actress. And I can't.

Any actress. Like, I want to say Catherine O'Hara. That's wrong. But like, there's another actress that's like. Pola Negri? You'd say Pola Negri. Let's say miss pola but just the hair the moment the cape moment like the open thing i was i live for it well when you say that buddy is timeless is unchanging is constant yeah how does that square with the

way that you know you change as a human being like is that i don't know how does that negotiate or how does that stay relative to how you are i have to separate the two like i have i've got to make sure that i don't inject too much into him yeah i mean of course it's it's it's a part of me but you know i don't want there's things that buddy might say that i might go i don't really agree with that but it's a character yeah i have to let the characters breathe sure sure I have to let him say what he has to say. And I know that I write what he says. But there is a part of my brain when I'm Buddy, it's weird. He's like smarter than me.

Oh, wow. I was watching an interview that you did or reading an interview that you did. And you said, you know, he's the smartest person in the room. And I was like, yeah, but that doesn't feel like vain at all to say. This is just like an extension of you. And it's almost like, yes, when you allow yourself to write a character, it's like these things that wouldn't even occur to you in life do occur to you. And it does seem like another person that is you.

Yeah, and all the roadblocks that I find in my life and all the ways that I trip, you know, trip myself up. He just doesn't worry about those. I mean, he's a guy that was born in a very, very difficult time. Born into war, basically. My generation is, we're like, we're screwed. I mean, we're just, we all have PTSD. We're just screwed.

But Buddy was born into this kind of like cauldron. Yes. And this effeminate man, you know, from the country, from a rural area. I mean, I really know his life. Yeah. But he knew who he was from day one. He was never in the closet. You know, he emerged fully formed.

And no matter what happened to him, no matter what kind of bullshit people threw at him, he was always like, it just water off a duck's back. He survived. He's a survivor. He's absolutely resilient. And there's nothing that really will stop him. Wow.

And he's like the best of me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he earns that. And you, by proxy, earn being able to really say whatever it is that you want. Well, that's the thing right now. Like I was saying to Rob in my direct, he's always saying to me, you're going to get in trouble. Like when are the SJWs going to come after you?

Because my show is appalling. Yeah, I can't wait. I mean, it just, I don't spare anyone. And Buddy just tramples in every taboo, everything you're not supposed to say. And for a white man at my age that I'm allowed to say this, no white guys can say this anymore. But I'm a gay man, and I'm not just a gay man like you guys. I'm an older gay man, so I'm a war survivor.

Like you look at me and you might go, I don't like that. But you go, he don't like that. But you go, he's missing a leg. You've got to listen to Gramps. And so it's a kind of a, for comedy today, which is so tiptoe-y, everyone's tiptoeing. And I just go, oh, I don't care if there's quicksand. I'm going swimming.

But then, so when Robin asks you that, I mean, is your answer like, well, it doesn't, that's besides besides the point like it's not even about like I wouldn't I kind of I kind of want to get it over with uh huh but then I might not even have to yeah

because people and the moment and the thing is it's a super power in comedy today because everyone's so delicate yeah and I

I've earned it yeah and it is true it's like it's just I'm a war vet I've earned it so I don't care if you is true. It's just, I'm a war vet. I've earned it. So I don't care if you go, you can't say that.

I go, I just did. Yeah. And it's just a joke. It's just. They're just jokes. Yeah. So starting out. Right.

When you started out and you really were the first, you know, gay sketch comedian. Well, actually, there was no one. Right. There was no one. No one. So what's the response? Women, but not men. Well, actually, in comics, there was no one. Anywhere in comedy. So what's the response? Women, but not men. Right, right, right. Very, very different thing. I totally agree with you. They're not even remotely the same. I totally agree.

Now, what's the response from other comics when you start to, you know, have success with Kids in the Hall? When I began? Yeah. Oh, it's ugly. Yeah, it's ugly. And see, when I was very young, even before I met the kids in the hall, I went to acting school. I wanted to be an actor.

I wanted to be a serious actor, and I wanted to be funny on talk shows. I never wanted to be a comedian. I didn't think it was possible for a comedian to talk about his life. I can't talk about my life. Yeah, who's going to want to hear it? I mean, I came out. I spent my whole life fighting the urge to kill myself, basically, thinking that I was the worst thing on earth. Then when I finally had the courage to do it, suddenly you're hit by this plague that tells you that everything society says about you is true.

So it's just a double whammy. So I just thought, I can't. And the homophobia of the 80s and 90s, I mean, you can't, it was breathtaking, and I really thought that, oh, it's gonna, and this is what people have to know, that society can flip back 30 years on a dime. Absolutely.

You have to be very careful. I mean, things can just switch like that, and that's what happened. So I wanted to be, I thought I'm going to be, so I did try to do standup comedy and I went three times to open mics. And, you know, I was so terrified that I wouldn't even perform as myself. I performed as Manny Coon, who was my, actually my first character, who's a very masculine man, like a bull, like a big alpha male artist.

And I talk in a real masculine way and I drink and I smoke. I really had to cover myself up. And even so, the comedians could still tell that I was gay. Not when I'm on stage, but backstage before I put on my male mantle. And they were so evil to me oh god and i remember they they you know they would this is you know they introduced me as they

said our next comedian just gave us all a blow job backstage i wasn't even out right so they immediately telegraphed to the audience this is a faggot and in those days every comic every comic had a faggy voice that they did every stand-up club uh comedian would pick if there was a solo male he always became lance or bruce those were the two gay names and they would single him out and so every show was like that the homophobia was just literally everywhere in the audience with the comedians. And then the second time, I didn't do well. Second time, I did a little better. And then the third time, this is what happened.

The comedian introduced me. And after my set, he wiped the mic and said, I'm wiping the AIDS germs off. Jesus Christ. And you know what? What's crazy is I bet at the time you weren't even like, fuck that. You were just kind of like, well, that's what they do.

That's what they say. I was both. Yeah. Yeah, I was both. Because the thing about you, Scott, is that you dug your heels even deeper. Well, exactly. And because that night,

that was a terrible, and that was the last time I'd stand up comedy until many years later when the world changed. Yeah. But I remember being called a faggot by the not someone said shut up faggot and i lost it and i jumped out off the stage and i knocked their beers off and i got into it

oh yeah and i just realized after these incidents i just can't do the energy there's no possible way i can do this and i and i just met the kids in the hall and I didn't even really know that I was capable of doing characters. I thought I was going to be a movie star. I wasn't going to do characters. But I met them and I thought it was love at first sight and I thought, this is my future. And I

realized maybe in a subconscious way that I could bury myself in this team, like a hockey lineup, and I could be a great player but I can only do this in a team right now because the world will not accept that right and so once I met them that was it I shut the door on the other side lovely was there any sort of I've always been curious was there any sort of um thought as to because I feel like with me and Matt we have this fun little coterie of queer comedians now and we're so lucky to have that group

and that camaraderie. You really are. And I'm thrilled for you, you know. Oh, thank you. Just you two, not the other ones. Yeah, no, no, no. Not even them. I forgot their names.

I forgot their names. Good, good. It's best two. But then we do share a space with like a straight comedian group. Like there is this level of switching up our code a little bit where it's like the behaviors change yeah and so was there ever that level with with with the kids in the

hall where it was at the even the kids in the hall you know everybody we're all on a journey people change it's not like they they just said yeah we'll bring in it wasn't like that it was it was a process so then how would you pitch the things like i want to do i want to be queen elizabethan drag i want to do buddy cole i want to be Queen Elizabeth in drag. I want to do Buddy Cole. I want to be a secretary. You know, like, well, it was it was it was a gradual thing. The first person that wanted me to be a member of the group was Mark McKinney. He saw me perform theater sports.

And I and I was like a real wild man at the time. I would wear pantsuits that would be slit down to here. So I'd be half naked. I'd wear strands of pearls. I glue cigarette butts to my ears. I was a weird combination of everything. And I was openly gay. That's when I,

and nobody was. And I just didn't give a shit. And they would, we would do theater sports. I was on a theater sports team. And they would always, if you did something that they thought was untoward or, you know, like too provocative,

they would give you a zero. And anytime anything gay came up that was immediately unacceptable so i was constantly being zeroed and all the rest but they mark saw that and went wow that guy's a that's a punk yeah and so um and he was punk rock to be gay yes yeah and so so he brought me in but they were not the others were not aboard and you know there was a lot of hazing that went on. Wow. Let me just leave it at that. Sure, sure, sure.

And there was some ugly things that occurred. Okay. But over time, and when I basically, I gave, I did Buddy Cole, I did Fran, I did Manny, and I guess they started to realize, oh, he's got some, but I did monologues at the time. But I was very out of control. I had no control. I didn't know how to be in a group. Right. And the time but i was very out of control i had no control i didn't know how to be in a group right and then but i had a bag of wigs and dresses and and they they had already started to play women but it was very differently but once i came aboard that really

that really because for me it was for them it was a huge deal for me like as gay men i'm like it's natural for me to like play a woman play a man i don't see any i just i don't really see the big difference of course half my characters are women that's going to that's natural yeah and and so that that that kind of they took that on in a way and i in a strange way are their acceptance of homosexuality and um cross-dressing and all the rest of the things that we did became a punk thing. Yes. Like a punk thing.

You know what I mean? It became like a fuck you. Yes. And to guys that were so, it was like they would kiss each other. Right. And that was really a fuck you to men, to basic society.

To the patriarchy, yeah. And so they realized that this was a kind of a way to rebel. Right. And so, but then once I was aboard, it was about six months, one night they took me out, they made up a song, they sang me a song and said, you're in the kids in the hall. And that was it. And that was it. And I took the key, I swallowed it, no one was ever getting back in again. And I knew that that was it. I was like, I was blowing that entrance up because I was, no one was getting in. And I knew that that was it. I was like, I was blowing that entrance up because I was,

no one was getting in. And I knew this was it for life. And so, and we were still together and we're still talking about a reboot. And you know, so it is exciting. Very exciting.

And, but just the fact that you had to be in this proving ground for a while is, is, you know, kind of, yeah.

And it still exists. Of course it does. You know what? I think there's like who was I just I was just saying yesterday I got on the phone because someone wanted to talk

to get my take on the Hannah Gadsby situation yeah yeah yeah I like calling it a situation it's better than calling it a comedy special well it's become this whole thing now where it's like you know

I just feel like there's there's the special and you can have your thoughts on the special everyone has their thoughts on the special but then it's so funny to me that like that there's this whole thing of like well you know she shouldn't even be up there on the stage it's like okay you don't like it you don't like it but for her to get up there and be able to do what she's doing, like, it's harder for her than you straight white dudes can ever conceive of because you've never had to have a second thought about walking into a room and taking up all the space as yourself. Right. Whereas there's everyone else in the world. And it's just like, it's so different.

Like, to walk in and have to filter yourself. Yes. And it takes such a long time. It's just, it's such a, you know, I'm not surprised to hear that even though these guys seem so open-minded, it was still a process in the beginning because they are who they are.

They're men. They're straight men. They're products of their time. You know, you have to let people, everyone's on a journey. You can't, you know, I mean, people shouldn't be judged by the way they were 10 years ago 15 years ago that's society most people just follow the you know what everyone's society tells them to do yeah and and they didn't know any better and and you know but i have not they they we all learned

together and i had things to learn as well but i think what helped me was I come from a family of five boys, so I understood how males behave in a group, and I know how to, I guess I'm a fighter. Yeah. And that was very important. And I mean, it might not be politically correct to say it, but I think one of the things that made them accept me was they knew that if it got into a scrap,

I could hurt all of them very badly. I feel that I could fight a lot of my street friends. Oh, I think you'd be like, you'd go ratchet. I would, yeah. I'd curb stomp. Oh no, like gay rage?

Once it's unleashed? I'm sorry. Even gay Canadian rage? It's the worst. Because it's even, because these people, these people, their rage is so close to the surface. Yes, yes, yes. And they love it and they nurture it. We bury it. So when it comes roaring up, it's like a vein of lava that's come from the center of the earth.

Their vein of lava is just under the surface, like right under, oh, look at this piece of loam. Look at there's lava right under it. Loam, I said loam. But I think gay rage is a terrifying thing. I actually, I've been writing characters recently again, and what I'm realizing is it's easiest for me to operate in a place of anger. Oh yeah, or any strong emotion.

Actually, like, well, not actually, no. Okay. Oh, yeah. Or any strong emotion. Actually, like, well, not actually, no. Okay, okay, okay. Not any strong emotion. Like, a few of the things I've been writing lately, I'm like, well, I can't do these all on a set together because everyone's screaming. Everyone's mad and pissed. And I was just like, what is that?

I think what is that, like, sort of, like, I think maybe it's a couple things. It's observing that kind of, like, very available like masculinity in the world from an early age absolutely and i think with gay men particularly i think one of the reasons why i've had why i've struggled with my temper and why i have such a close relationship to rage one of the things is i made this very terrible connection as a child between rage and masculinity. And I felt so, you know,

that I felt so demasculinized that I thought, well, I can't be a complete faggot because I'm scary in a fight. Yes, yes. Which is not a great connection to make. But that's the math that you do. That's the math that I do. Do you know what's normalized, which is so insane?

This is normalized. The thing of screaming at a television set because the sports team you like is losing. Oh, sure. Like, that is normalized. It is normal. What a crazy behavior. It's insane.

But don't you scream at the TV when the wrong actress wins the Oscars? A hundred percent, yes. Come on. And it's always the wrong actress. It's always the wrong one. Very, very nearly always. Who do we say? A hundred percent, yes. Come on. And it's always the wrong actress. It's always the wrong one. Very, very nearly always. Who do we say? Let me tell you something.

I don't care if she deserves it or not. If Lady Gaga doesn't win this year, I'm furious. Oh, sure. I want to burn the whole Oscars down. Lady Gaga should win Best Actress. Have you seen it yet? No.

No. I've seen the trailer. See, this is that rage we're talking about. That's what I'm saying. It's because I know that she's close to queer, and so I'm like, J.J. Dwan. And I root for, you know what? This is another thing,

and I want to get your take on this, too. Did you ever find that, like, it was almost harder to root for the people that were closest to you because of the spaces that were open. Of course. The limited spaces. The more I love someone, the more difficult it is for me to tell them that or to praise them.

Because I was raised in a way with my parents that, you know, it spoils people. Yeah. That if you get too much praise, it will spoil you. Yeah. And so it's hard for me. I've learned, I've tried very hard because I always go, I don't want to, I think they did a great job. I don't want to tell them because they'll get soft. I'm specifically talking about gay men though.

Oh, gay men are the worst. I mean, I'm just going to say that a blanket statement. We're the worst to each other. We really are. We're just terrible to each other. We've had such a good experience because our friends in the New York queer comedy kind of, we're very supportive. But then you go on to like LA.

Right. Those gays are not supportive of us. Well, I mean, this is the thing. I think there are changes happening, but you guys know as gay comics, we still have a ceiling. There's not one of us has become a star. No.

There has never been a gay male, an openly gay male comic star. You're absolutely right. Ever. There are no one on Netflix. Never. And one of the reasons is us. Yes. an openly gay male comedy star you're absolutely right ever there are no no one on Netflix never and I and one of the reasons

is us because we do not support other gay men we do not unless they're in drag or they're a prostitute a hustler or a porn star

or a fucking hot as fuck and even then dumb as fuck yeah because we worship dumb and hot and young but if you're talent

no because every gay man thinks they're a star right I'm like I and young but if you're talent no because every gay man thinks they're a star right I'm like I'm funny too no you're not bitch and I didn't mean to say bitch

but I just want I'm in the vote it's our favorite word we toss it out all the time but you know people assume

your shows must be filled with gay men I go hardly a couple I have a tiny gay following, but very

small. It's overwhelmingly straight people. But we don't support ourselves. So how can a community that isn't supported by its community ever supposed to reach that level? Like, all we do is support women. Like, we just will not go see a male,

a gay male make us laugh sure only a woman and i think that's kind of tragic it is in a way it's not even a thing of like there's not enough there's not enough support to go around because the women deserve the support that we give them but also they got enough now they got enough you're right you're right scott and scott's right you know what they're no you know what no don't top it up. You're filled to the brim. You know what? In fact, I see your meniscus. I see your meniscus.

You know, Kathy Griffin's selling out places in New Zealand. Please stop it now! The woman has sold it. We thought she was over. No, she was back. No, she's back, baby. Carnegie Hall, hon. And good for her.

No, I'm just kidding. I did you you mentioned this you mentioned but may i say one thing before it sounds like i've completely oh no sunk into bitterness which i have no no it's the idea that i am starting to see gay men coming there's always been a few gay men gay men of my generation and below well who followed the kids in the hall but now i'm starting to see young ones like you guys that are coming. And that thrills me to death because I'm like going, maybe they're going, maybe this generation might be able to not hate themselves so deeply.

I want you to know that it's changing. I want you to know from me, from my heart that it's changing. And you know what I mean? Like, I love like all of our friends and I changing and i and i and you know what i mean like yeah i love like all of our friends and i think everyone's so talented and you know it's just and that doesn't the real housewives of salt lake city are back i love that oh my gosh welcome and last season's drama was just the tip of the iceberg you You're recording us? I am disgusted.

Never in a million years after everything we've been through did I think that you would reach out to our sworn enemy. We were friends. How could you do this to me? I don't trust her. The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, Wednesdays at 9 on Bravo or stream it on City TV+. I'm Julian Edelman.

I'm Rob Gronkowski. Guess what, folks? We're teammates again. And we're going to welcome you guys all to Dudes on Dudes. I'm a dude, you're a dude, and Dudes on Dudes is our brand new show. We're going to highlight players, peers, guys that we played

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Listen to Dudes on Dudes on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On Thanksgiving Day, 1999, a five-year-old boy floated alone in the ocean. He had lost his mother trying to reach Florida from Cuba. He looked like a little angel. I mean, he looked so fresh. And his name, Elian Gonzalez, will make headlines everywhere. Elian Gonzalez.

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Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, I'm Jay Shetty and I'm the host of On Purpose. My latest episode is with Jelly Roll. This episode is one of the most honest and raw interviews I've ever had. We go deep into Jelly Roll's life story from being in and out of prison from the age of 13

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I just had such an anger. I was just so mad at life. Everything that wasn't right was everybody's fault but mine. I had such a victim mentality. I took zero accountability for anything in my life. I was the kid that if you asked what happened, I immediately started with everything but me. It took years for me to break that like years of work listen to on purpose with jay shetty on the iheart radio app apple podcast or wherever you get your podcasts trust me you won't want to miss this

one that's not lost on us because we but because we have like in years past like come up against that thing where it's like oh we're not getting that support from within our own community. Well, I hope I do hope that now it is changing. And we'll be told and we'll be told things like, well, you know, we couldn't get so and so. And so we asked this person and they couldn't do it. And and, you know, then we asked you. And of course, there's only the one spot in this cast for one of you. Right.

And things like that. And people don't understand like what they're really saying or they think that we know it and so they can yeah they can say it's just like it's this idea of like you know when you do these things when you set up these situations we go back to each other and we commiserate about it and you're actually the joke sure and it will turn it will it will change i think that you're right we still a little bit have that disease of um this this thing of unless unless a gay man is in drag they cannot become a star no man no one is out there finger waving for i mean i guess for james adomian or guy brand or you guys they're just not yeah and it's like i go if i if buddy wore a dress i'd be a superstar i mean and wait he has worn a dress he has he's he's worn he's he's worn a big collar

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I'm sure. Now I, okay, you mentioned this in a Village Voice interview recently. And this, I think, I agree with you. It's real. Well, let me just say this.

You said, I never found, something along the lines of, and this I think I agree with you it's real but let me just say this you said I never found something along the lines of I never thought that I always knew that being the first to do something was never going to get me

the attention or the money or whatever it's always the third person third yeah second's the real loser position because third

gets the money and the attention and the praise first is nothing like you know you look at the wright brothers there was someone before the wright brothers there was someone that did it's always the way and i but at the time i i maybe when i said that i was pretending to be philosophical about it and pretending that i knew it was going to be like that but i did not sure at the time, oh my God, once people get a load of what I'm doing and once the gay community sees what I'm doing,

my feet are never going to touch the ground. I'm going to be carried on a litter by gay men. Every gay man I want to sleep with will just go, what do you want to do to me? Yeah. Break my arm! It just didn't happen. And it was like such a huge fall for me and it broke my heart like i

went not only did it not happen the opposite happened and that broke my heart like in fact not only did people not support but there was this concerted effort i really believe to stop me and and a lot of gay men doing it and that broke broke my heart. See, but then, like, just, I read that quote, and that upset me in this way, where I was like, I want to correct, I don't have the power or whatever, the influence to do this, but I want to correct that somehow.

Like, I, like, we were telling people, we were telling our close friends, like, oh, we have Scott Thompson on this Sunday. And they lit up, they were like, oh my God, what a huge deal. Like, at least you always will have, I think you should, you'll have that respect.

That's it, yeah. I think you can, like, dine out on that for the rest of your life. And I'll tell you the other thing, it's not like, you know, I didn't, it's not like I was broke or anything, you know, and I've managed to. You worked on television. I've worked, and I've cobbled together a career, and I've done whatever I had to do, as I thought, why can't I go to the next level?

And I'll be honest, there was a period in my life when I was consumed by bitterness. Yeah, sure. Consumed. Yeah. And then I got sick. Yes, I...

And then I went, ah, this isn't killing me. You think it was part of it. Absolutely. Wow. You do. I absolutely do, yeah. And so now it's true.

Like I'm going... And I remember when I was young and I'm with Paul Beledi and he was like, you know, when you're an old man, maybe that's when people will get it. I'm not old yet, but I'm not young anymore. But I just thought, yeah, maybe I have to wait. But God, I didn't want to wait. I wanted to be when I was young and pretty. Yeah, of course.

I mean, yeah. I never want to wait. Now, here's another question. It's like, of course i mean yeah i don't want to wait now here's another question it's like of course there's this jealousy aspect you know gay men like i think a lot of like the what makes us us is you know we do we look up to women we look up to these actresses and pop stars and glamorous singers and divas and icons and when we see that one of us gets close to that i think of course there is that thing of jealousy but do you also think that a part of it is protection and wanting to be like, well, he's going to tell that story

and then everyone's going to think that's all of our story. Yes, absolutely. It's like, I think a lot of the reason many people in the gay community did not like me and continue to not like me was that it was a sense of like, oh, he's spilling secrets. He's telling about the darkness. He's, you know, and everybody,

and I think that, and they're like, how dare he? He's making us look bad. And so they didn't like that. It's hard to have a sense of humor about yourself when you've been attacked by, I guess, like the straight men for so long. So then they see like,

oh, look, he's proving them right. And because we can't see ourselves as these comedic creatures. No. And I think that's one of the reasons I think gay men love female comics so much is because female comics feed our delusion that we're fabulous.

They'll see all of our dysfunction and our ugliness. And they'll go, it's so fabulous that they're cheating on each other. It's so fabulous that they overdosed or whatever. And I mean, they feed our delusions. It's an external validation. Yes.

And they're all, you're all so fabulous boys. Like when Kathy Grimm goes, my gaze or whatever. It's like, you know what I mean? Like, and I don't do that.

I'm like, no, we're screwed up, maybe more screwed up than anyone. And I don't take any prisoners and I don't spare, I'm not going to like

spare gay people because, you know, like, well, I don't want people to know how screwed up we are. Sure, sure.

Because that's not what comedy does. No. Comedy is about approaching the darkness, bringing stuff out into the light and letting people look at it.

That's the kind of comedy that I love. And that's not that scary. But for a gay man of my generation, the darkness was dark 24-7. It was definitely the Nazgul were in charge. The Nazgul were at the door. You're not on the list. You're not on the list yeah look literally you're not on the list you're not on the list look uh there was this i mentioned this uh oh and this might have been

when we talked about crazy rich asians on patreon but uh there's this article that came out uh this this write-up the this whatever thing piece that said it's time to forgive the joy luck club and it was all about how for 25 years the joy luck club was the only thing that because asian people turned their backs on it they they were like this does not represent us this this is not who we are this is such a specific experience that does not represent the entire like they did on margaret show in a way yes absolutely and this is the thing about being first or being the only thing that's representative of of a community or an experience is that you cannot be saddled with all of this expectation and this responsibility. And God, like, it sucks that it just there always has to be.

I'm not saying that this was you, but there always has to be that one thing that is the pin cushion for everyone else's bullshit. Like, yeah, I think I think that's what we have to sort of get past. And I think in order to write this, we have to just sort of honor those things in the past. And I don't know. And it's a conscious decision to change that way of thinking. You know what I mean? This thing that represents you is not attacking you or killing you. It doesn't occupy one space.

And I think if there's something that's good about like the way that the entertainment industry has expanded in social media and all these like different kind of spaces is now there is so much room and so many platforms you got to fill it with something yeah and and there's only so many of these like voices that have filled these the you know previously small spaces and now that's like if you want if you want gay content there are networks yes that where that where that is obviously they should be on every network right right but you know like it's something yeah it i don't know it's it's yeah it's a mind fuck it's a mind fuck speaking of speaking of that sort of uh speaking of sort of this fucks the mind

Speaking of content I guess We ask all of our guests this question What was the culture that made you say Culture is for me Matt do you want to explain the question Yes okay so this is You know this is the It could be a movie it could be a piece of music

Could be a particular person In pop culture or just like You know just your surroundings and upbringing That culturally made you to say okay a piece of music could be a particular person in pop culture or just like, you know, just your surroundings and upbringing that culturally made you to say, okay, this is who I am. I'm stepping into culture as me. And it was this defining thing that made me that way.

You mean like, what do you mean? Like for people that have different kinds of answers to this question. For example, if on any given day I could say growing up on Long Island, that really formed me. Or I could say, um, I really got obsessed with the reality show survivor and that made me the person i am like whatever things like that it's a it's a broad question it's very broad but even

like were you even like a canadian upbringing for example right yeah yeah yeah what about you and your canadian upbringing oh god was there anything canade specifically canadian specifically canadian it was uh it was celine for me because it was it was going to notre dame in mont in montreal and being and like going on field trips to that church and celine affected us too and having our teachers well of course but having her but in in quebec it was like oh yeah oh inescapable but like on field trips like the teachers would be like this is where celine got married and we'd be like wow like that was that just reminds me i'm a to seeing here you did a fucking uh amazing interview on conan where you had some incredible jokes about leonardo that twink really the first twink first twink really the first twink our first well i guess river phoenix was the first twink. The first twink in the contemporary imagination.

You know what? You can go back through twinks throughout time. Oh, absolutely. James Dean. Twink. A Cavaggio painting. Twinks. Yeah, exactly. Yes, yes, yes.

Hercules and Newt. Oh. Newt was the first. And the centaur. Yes. A centaur twink. And the David versus Goliath. Was it a fawn?

Was it a fawn or a centaur? A satyr? No, a fawn. It was a fawn, yeah. I guess, you know, I guess when I, know comedy I would say Carol Burnett or Flip Wilson those were my two totems of comedy

Flip Wilson made me laugh like crazy and he played Geraldine and he played female and male characters and you connected with that very much so Geraldine and Carolol burnett those are my two it wasn't even stand-ups really because i i i wasn't i didn't i didn't have stand-up albums or anything like that i wasn't even like a music it was actually books for me

yeah books i get for me i'm a huge reader the lion the witch and the wardrobe would have been another one narnia narn. Favorite book in the series? Prince Caspian. Okay. And Twink. And Twink. And I like, I think Prince Caspian was the first literary Twink. Yeah, literary Twink.

Powerful Twink. Tom Sawyer. Tom Sawyer. Prince Caspian was the first Christian allegory Twink. Right, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Who's the Twink? Huck Finn or Tom Sawyer?

Oh, Tom Sawyer. Okay, Tom Sawyer was the Sawyer. Tom Finn is the first piece of hot white trash. Hot white trash. Jason Stackhouse. Yeah, absolutely. Hot white trash. Didn't JTT play Tom Sawyer? Justin Taylor. Jonathan Taylor

Thomas. Another twink. Another 90s twink. Hugh and Huck and Finn. Yes, oh my god. When they tried to sex up the Huckleberry Finn novels. You don't need to. It's all there. It's all there. It's all there.

I've got to revisit. Oh, I reread it every couple of years. Oh, good. Wait, what are your big revisity books? I mean, how often do you reread something? Not a lot, but that's definitely, I do go back to the Narnia books, which is weird, you know,

and I've read Lord of the Rings three times. I've read Dune three times. I'm a real nerd. Oh, so then, yeah, you love your fantasy. I love science fiction and fantasy. The Chrysalids, that sort of stuff. Are you a Star Wars queen? No.

See, Luke Skywalker, that's a twink. Very much a twink, yeah. The Dagobah system. I don't like twinks. I found him bland. For me, it was all about Harrison Ford. Oh, for sure. Sure, of course. You know, I always like men.

I was like Liz Taylor. I like all my men 40. Yeah. You know what I mean? He's always been 40. He's still 40 to this day. She liked men at 40 when she was 20. She liked men that were 40 when she was 60.

Wow. I'm not saying I'm Liz Taylor, but... That's what you said. No, that's what you said. Okay, I did say it. Yeah, you said that. I might say it. Look at me.

I can't hide my violet eyes. Your Oscar for Butterfield 8, you brought it with you. I did. Yeah, it's here. It's on the table. It's right there. Everyone knows this one's bullshit.

It's not the one I deserved it for. Oh, and you can make an argument about that. That's true. You know, Kathleen Turner's out there making that argument. What an interview. That was a great interview. Talk about a gay icon. That's one we forgot. The children have forgotten

Kathleen. We need to remind them. We don't need to remind them. She reminds them. She's also Jessica Rabbit, people. Have some respect. Body heat, darling now it's interesting that you mentioned philip wilson because i feel like and it's interesting that you mentioned

forgotten he's well yes that i mean even i don't i will admit that i don't have that familiarity with flip right with flip wilson but the fact that you mentioned the drag aspect and that you and that like that goes like you compare that to maybe the way that the other kids in the hall conceived of drag as maybe more of like a monty python analog yes maybe the way that the other kids in the hall conceived of drag as maybe more of like a monty python yes yes maybe you were probably the one to like elevate that out of this like well yeah i didn't think of it as a caricature yeah and i think from day one we were like and i and i don't know if it was really me that i think they all kind of when they first started doing women they all wanted to just play women as women yes okay and and you know i'd

love to claim that for myself sure and i think maybe so i maybe help them deepen it like i help them i in a way maybe like let go of that kind of like masculine i gotta like you know like a movie like like too long foo for example you know like the way that wesley snipes telegraphs the audience with his guns that don't remember i'm still a man of course like we we didn't want any of that telegraph we wanted to like completely submerge ourselves into our characters and uh but definitely i think we're not like monty python we are very much like monty python but in terms of the portrayal of women yeah we took it further yes there were we didn't have screechy voices mean, they used to do some women that were pretty damn real, but most of the women were more caricature.

Right, right. And when we first got on television, our first wardrobe person who did not work out, all of our female costumes, she tried to make them all silly, like big tits. Like draggy. Yeah, draggy. And we were like, no, fewer we're like no we're not

doing it we go and then we'd work on something oh that's she go it's boring looking yeah it's a boring woman yeah this is not and this is it's a real woman yeah or it's the portrayal of a real woman women aren't women aren't fabulous a woman that you would see on the street like oh yeah just yeah a woman and that was a profound i mean that was one of the greatest journeys that we all took that journey into like gender like wow this is fun do you think that had you not been on the group maybe they wouldn't have got there it might not have gotten as far i don't know they wouldn't have gone as far because with you it's like secretary sketch i feel like bruce was it was it bruce you and bruce yeah me and bruce bruce put on some sort of feminine affect which was fine like it worked

for the character it does but for you like you don, you didn't really change anything. I don't. Like, Kathy, I'm not really doing anything. I use my voice. I lighten it a little bit. Barely, yeah. Barely. But as a secretary, not as a woman. You know what I mean? You're playing the secretary. You're not playing a woman.

And Kathy's not overtly feminine. She's kind of an alpha female. Yes. She asked the question. Yes, but it's true. With me and Bruce, the balance, each one, I think he made me funnier in terms of Kathy's funny, but she's

not... Bruce's character is much more overtly funny, but I think my Kathy made Bruce's more realistic. Absolutely. And those two they they were yin and yang and and they really matched each other and but but my kathy came about through him his kathy was first i and then my cat i my kathy came after and then that's when the but the secretaries actually that's not the secretaries were actually kind of born all at once in a weird way because it was

in the very first piece called which was about turning over and it was the first time all five of us were in drag and it was a very remarkable moment

and it was about five secretaries and I don't even think and then we took on they weren't really people yet yeah right

Bruce's was starting to be a person but I found the wig and you guys know it's the wig it was guys know it's the wig it's the wig honey yeah I fell in love with that wig and that and all the character flowed from the way yes it's so true and it was a scene about um the character Bruce it's like oh my god what's going on I'm doing I'm about to turn over and it was like a turnover and it was basically like a

clock when it goes from like 359 to four yeah and she had it in the back of her head and it was she turned over and we all were giving her birthday party but i remember we all came out together and we were like seeing each other as women all five of us yeah and this kind of natural we became nicer to each other it all changed and every all those five, because there's five women in that secretarial pool. And those were all, all the looks were pretty much settled that day. They didn't have names yet, but Dave had that red wig and Kevin had that black wig.

Mark's gray. That Tanya wig. Tanya wig. And I love that Tanya sketch too. Tanya's tanya is great oh my god tanya she is monday what was it monday so good the tanya the tanya sketch where she's at the party and she's trying to get you guys to give her the weed that's the oh that's it yeah but you know but but we uh i don't know what but see but like i don't know i'm so glad you noticed the caddy i'm not doing anything right no but and and you know what that's really

me yeah that's how that woman exists in the world but it's so true because like these small shifts that happen just when you put the wig on i got i had to do it actually at the at the duplex no way not the dupe yes it was at the duplex it wasn't at Not the duplex. Yes, it was at the duplex. It wasn't at Joe's Pub. I did drag years ago. Liz Suedos dragged. Oh, that's right. Liz. And she I would get in the full dress and I guess they were like go-go boots. They weren't even heels. I couldn't find anything for me. I had the wig

and she was like, wow, you really change when you put that on. And it was weird. I got very self-conscious about it because I was five years younger than I am now, six years younger. And it was like, oh, self-conscious about it because i was five years younger than i am now six years younger and it was like oh no like am i revealing my future am i revealing something about myself or am i too good at this or like and it's this thing i'm like too good at drag i mean no no i understand what you're saying you know what i mean where it's like you want to take yourself seriously and the world has made you think that you can't be serious doing this thing.

You know what I mean? I think a lot of, as a gay actor, gay performer, gay comedian, I think we all kind of have the same dreams and goals as anyone else that's in the entertainment industry. You want to have a mainstream career. You want to be mainstream successful. So when you find a niche or a success or a skill in doing something that's historically not that in fact

it's drag is literally outside the mainstream makes fun of the mainstream yes you're like oh no naturally like what are my real skills so it was this moment of like she was trying to compliment me and be like wow you're really the character that's great but it was this thing in my head like the gay man inside me was like yeah Well, I remember the first time I started doing Buddy Cole, I'd never done that gay accent before. I think most gay men have gay voices. I don't think that's that controversial. I think

most of us. No, I don't know. I actually don't know what you're talking about. Except for myself, right? Anyways, when I first started doing the voice, of course, you did. Come on, you're the faggot on the left. Of course, I mean, Jesus Christ. But you know, when I first started doing the voice, of course, you did. You did. Come on, you. Come on. The faggot on the left. Of course, I mean, Jesus Christ. But you know, when I first started doing that,

it was the lisp because I thought, oh, if I start talking like that, the wind will change and it will be like that for the rest of my life. And I was terrified of doing that. Like I would never, ever imitate that because I always thought, well, I've spent my whole life trying to pass

and I've spent my whole life trying to present as masculine that I can't do that because then all of the defenses will fall away and I'll be revealed as a shrieking queen. Realize that's horrible. And then create this other person that you are. Exist in that for seven, eight, nine, ten years, which is how long I did. And then have to reestablish and re-find who you are again. Oh, you should both read... Have you read Covering by Kenji Yoshino? No. He's a Yale... He's a...

I guess he's just... I'm already turned off. Okay. No, he's... You're boring, bitch! He's a legal scholar at yale but he's he wrote this book that's that's about the stages of coming out of it yeah yeah yeah of coming out and then maybe of trying to like pass of like having this phase where you sort of yeah

are trying to negotiate whether you you want to pass or not and then the final sort of freeing moment is oh i've never gotten to that moment maybe Maybe I haven't either. I don't know if I'm capable of it any longer. Well, I think it's... I did for a while. The final moment is just about not caring about passing. And I think... You're saying that you haven't gotten to that point? Your masculine characters

are quite masculine. I know. I think I've studied men my whole life. You're a great actor. I just love playing those characters and I thought that maybe society would allow me to, but they did not. You know, they said, no, you're going to play the neutered fag who lives next door,

who tells the main character how to live or what dress to wear. Right. You know, and that's, because that's how we know you. Yeah. And, but, you know, in terms of, like I had to,

because if I, I had to kill everything feminine in me in order to survive in a way. And I wasn't very successful at it. Because I just didn't want to get beat up. I had four brothers. I lived in like a hockey camp. So it was very different. And anyone to be a homosexual male at that time was the worst thing that a man could be.

Yeah, you were disgusting. You were disgusting. That's, I think, something that people don't understand is that, you know, once you realize what you are, and not only, like, do you get slapped over the head with how much society hates it, it's they hate it because they're disgusted by it. You know, they don't hate it because it doesn't, you it's it's not in their religious beliefs or whatever about that's a cover they hate it because they're disgusted with the with the with the idea behind how we have sex it's sodomy yeah it's all about sodomy yeah this is what people don't you say you can't take that

out of the equation and that's what i think we kind of went wrong this whole i mean gay marriage but you can't take sodomy out of it and that's one of the key. And that's where I think we kind of went wrong this whole, I mean, gay marriage, but you can't take sodomy out of it. And that's one of the key differences between the way women, gay females, and gay males,

they don't engage in sodomy. Oh, they can. Because their sex isn't disgusting. It's not disgusting. We're disgusting. Yes, and they see us disgusting.

And I think that the gay movement has tried very hard to distance ourselves from the, from basically ground zero. You cannot. We're going to have to face it. The society's going to have to face we fuck each other in the ass.

In the asshole. Okay? 100%. And you can't dress it up with love wins. Yes. Sodomy fucking wins. Sodomy wins. Sodomy wins.

Title of app. It's about sodomy wins title of it's about fucking and i my theory is that sodomy is the original sin this is my this is my this is my ted talk here you go please please it's the it's the the reason the male homosexual is the most i think benighted and i said benighted creature on blighted bened, lowest creature on the planet is because of sodomy. And it's the ultimate sin. My belief, in terms of the Bible, in terms of the original sin, if you go back to Adam and Eve, this is my theory about the apple. The apple is the anus. That when Adam and Eve, I'm not saying this is a real thing, but in terms of these cultural myths and archetypes.

Yes. Here's my theory. Come on. That, think about the Garden of Eden back Yes. Here's my theory. Come on. That, think about the Garden of Eden back then. They didn't have apples like today. They'd be little crab apples, little crab apples. And an anus looks a little bit like a crab. A little bit, a little bit.

Before it's been trained. Sure, sure. And I think that one day, and they didn't know what to do. God was like, I got these two. I got them in this little zoo. I'm going to enjoy watching them. They're never going to have kids. And then one day, Eve's bending over the water to pick up a flower to put in her hair.

And somehow her cheeks come apart. And he sees that little anus there. And he's like, boom. And his penis goes up, his snake. Yes. And the snake wants that apple. Oh. And he fucks her, and she's like, what the fuck?

He fucks, and they discover a way to have sex without having children. Yeah. And that makes God furious. Furious. Because now he can't control them, because now they have a way to have sex, to give each other pleasure without procreation. And that's the original sin.

So the snake is the cock, the apple is the anus. And so sodomy is in our subconscious as the ultimate original sin that God has kicked out of the Garden of Eden. So naturally the homosexual is the devil. It's the snake, which is why this is a very cynical, pessimistic thing to say, that you have to understand that I don't think in our lifetimes we're ever really going to get past that completely. So I've accepted that there's always going to be this level of hatred and visceral disgust towards the homosexual male.

And in order for me to have a good life, I have to accept that it's always going to be there. And in order for me to live in this world, I have to accept that and find a way to live with that and do everything in my power to change it but accept that I can only do so much and that society can only change incrementally. I agree with you 100%. And that's why when people say,

oh, lesbians, there's lots of gay, there's lots of lesbian stars. It's not the same. Because there's no sodomy involved. Don't pretend that gay men and lesbians have the same journey.

No. It's not true. And you've said that for men, for the patriarchy, they view lesbianism as this thing that is somewhat more acceptable than gay male homosexuality. I think much more.

Because it's like, oh, well then you're after the same thing I am. They mimic men. They mimic men. So they go up. In terms of desire, right? That's right. So they go up. In terms of desire, right? That's right. So they go up.

They move up the ladder. But a gay male falls from his perch. And a gay white male falls the furthest. Because suddenly you're supposed to have the world and then you're taken away from you. So you plummet. You plummet.

And so I've accepted that. It sounds nihilistic that i would accept it but i go i have to live my life i have to and i it's not like i'm not i haven't given up sure but i accept that there's going to be because also i don't live in a bubble you leave the you leave the west and you'll see what real homophobia oh yeah and that's when you go okay this is on this is gonna take centuries yeah sure you know what's crazy this might make me sound like a lunatic oh god i believe i believe because you've been so sane and measured and calm i think we'll see a lesbian president before we see a gay male

oh absolutely way more i totally agree i actually i don't think that anyone before we see a gay male. Oh, absolutely. Way more. I totally agree. I don't think that anyone will ever allow a gay male to leave this country. Leave this great nation. I'd love a lesbian president. I'd love one. It's so interesting because it's true. It's this thing of the disgust

factor. And you know, whenever anyone... And I'm just so glad we brought Sodomy back into the discussion. I will say this. whenever anyone even mentions the name eminem i'm like you have to understand like the rapper eminem of course i know you're talking about i wanted to clarify for the listeners for everybody for the listeners all right so listen when when he dictated in popular culture, and he was inescapable. Oh, he was gigantic. And this is when I was like forming.

I was like a middle schooler. That's interesting. So the most popular musician, what people heard in their ears, right to the brain, was Eminem saying, gay men are disgusting. Disgusting.

Lyrics about him using the word faggot. And it's the way you say faggot when you're a straight man. We can say faggot. Straight men may say faggot. And it hurts. And he would use that word. And he would talk about gays and then follow it up with sound effects. And then everyone soaked that in

all hip hop music did that all rap let's be honest honestly tremendous tremendous amounts of you know film and television shows everything you know I was also watching that interview with you and you could you couldn't say the word tits but you could say the word faggot of course

and they wouldn't they would beep out tits and they wouldn't beep out faggot. Of course. And they wouldn't, they would beep out tits. Yes. And they wouldn't beep out faggot, which is hate speech. They shouldn't, to me, they shouldn't bleep out anything. And I agree with you. But if we're going to have standards and practices, wow. Is tits hurting anyone? Is faggot potentially hurting someone? Yeah, it's different.

So it's like, who makes the decisions about this stuff? Who dictates culturally what's happening it's like it has been hard it's tough and it's only in the past i think three four five years maybe three to five years that's when the penny something changed three to five years ago i'm not exactly sure what it was culturally that did it but something suddenly uh we were at the tipping point and i think suddenly society went it was like over 50% that said you know what that kind of virulent homophobia is not cool

and something changed and who knows what it is I don't think it was a particular person in pop culture I don't think it was but now it's like you got like this is actually kind of interesting I'd like your take on it do you know Troye Sivan the pop singer the song Bloom that he just came out with it's about bottoming it's about huge pop star it's a it's a

big pop song i bloom i bloom just for you it's it's all about it's like the lyrics leading up to the chorus he was on saturday night live as a musical guest he was he's a major pop star he's australian his name's troy savant he's actually going to be in the new movie with uh nicole kidman called boy raised about conversion therapy he's a major star he's a pop star twink extraordinaire um wow yes and he is i'm blown away his his big single right now is called bloom it's about bottoming and he and everyone knows that he released he released not really tweeted about it hashtag bops about bottoming it's it's it's pretty remarkable to me that's well that's remarkable i'm like actually i'm i'm gobsmacked i can i can't even speak great

because it's not even about being the top it's like no no for god's sake gay men shame each other for bottoming sure god's sake i got so much to show you the mountains and the waters i'm begging just to know you it's true baby i've been saving this for you and then the pre-chorus is all about how he's like please hold my hand before you before you like what is it hold my hand before you go in i need you to hold my hand if i get scared now i might tell you to take a second baby slow it down you should know why you should know why i bloom i bloom just so anyway actually making me you're gonna make me cry yeah right we're gonna listen to it afterwards and we're gonna have an emotional moment it's it's it's it's wonderful it's great and you know

what when troy simon first came out a few years ago i was like who the fuck is this guy no thank you was doing that thing of i don't want to see another game dare he but now like i think the community at large and we celebrate him i think where everyone's just trying to rally around this guy like oh great like you know what wonderful to their to the credit of some of the other pop stars that are featuring him he's on ariana grande records he came out taylor swift brought him out at her concert they performed my my my together his other song like you know whatever you think about those pop stars whatever you think

about them they're still it's a fucking bottom pop star y'all a bottom pop star coming out singing about his asshole his asshole

I see this really shock you yeah it shocks me that's great yeah I actually I don't know what to say yeah yeah I feel like

wow that's I didn't even maybe it won't take 200 years right maybe 170 you know what well for president I don't, wow, that's, I didn't even, maybe it won't take 200 years. Right. Maybe 170. You know what? Well, for president, I don't know.

Oh, no, that's not. Pop star. We can get pop star. But the thing is, too, it's like, you know what they've always done is this, like, straight men have always done, what do you mean there's no gay? What about Elton John? It's like, okay, but, like, he wasn't singing about gay sex. And I'm sorry, Elton John was closeted when I was young

no he got married he didn't come out until he was an old man not an old man but he didn't no he no older

I mean Freddie Mercury was in the closet and then what about Bowie Bowie wasn't gay Bowie just played with gayness Mick Jagger wasn't gay they might have sucked one cock

big fucking deal I've eaten two pussies it doesn't make me straight no oh yeah at least you're not golden yesterday no I didn't

no but I've had sex with women but when I was no the woman never accused me of being straight yeah that's beautiful

it's funny though the farthest I ever went with a woman is with two girls who actually knew that I was gay and then it was like at the same time yeah like the same time.

Yeah. At the same time. Oh, good for you. No, dick wouldn't work. But the thing is, we, you know. What'd you do? Touch titties. Bleep that out, HPJ.

You can't say titties. You can't say titties. S and P is going to get us. Wow. Fence people, Joe. Oh, you mean Sarah Jessica Parker? You just dropped the J? Oh, we're done with the J.

We're done with S&P. It's all S&P. If she came out and said she was now Sarah Parker, I would rise to my feet, bitch. I would say, yes, honey, you reinvent. Finally. Reinvent, honey. If she announced that at a Cynthia Nixon event, I would.

Oh, God. She might win. She might win. That's what she needs to do to help Cynthia win. She needs to come out and say, my name is Sarah Parker. Everyone's going to be like, what? Oh, my God. Kim Cattrall will come out. She's like, I'm Kim Jessica Cattrall.

Oh, my God. That's where the J went. Kim found it. She took it. She absorbed it. Hiding it in her pussy all these years. Here's a Jay. Found it, Sarah, you bitch. Phenom.

Sarah's Jay. Where's Sarah's Jay? Oh, my God. Fucking what's her face? Kristen Davis is like, I'm here too, guys. They're like, who? What was that? The wind?

Who's that woman with two names? Get lost. Two names. Two names. Loser. Kristen Davis. Kristen Davis. A s. Two named loser. Kristen Davis. Kristen Davis. A sibilance heavy name.

Yeah, very. Very heavy. Unsung hero of the film. I do have to say, I will hate myself if I don't tell you this to your face, Scott. We don't want you

to hate yourself. I feel like if they don't, if you are not approached by the crown to portray Elizabeth in her later years. Olivia Colman who? That is absolutely my dream.

My delusional dream that I will play the queen from like 40 to 60. Because you, you give me Claire Foy. Out of anybody else? No, but out of any other actor, actress? Why not?

I wouldn't do it. I look just like her you look just like her I mean it's the bone structure is uncanny it's exact

yes like I mean and I wouldn't do it campy no and I've been preparing for this moment yeah I've actually been preparing

a queen for the crown yes that is a little that is more realistic than my queen right so I've been watching that show

well it's the greatest it's wonderful and I mean I'm upset and I watched I'm actually this is embarrassing but I've been watching a lot of old footies

of Elizabeth which I would do anyways right just because I want because when I'm approached by the people of the crown to play the older queen

I want them to know that I'm going to do her honor yeah and of course we might have to wear a lot of like turtledoves and things. You might have to do things. You know what?

I'll probably make you forget Claire Foy. I bet you will. I bet you will. I have a feeling it might be Miami. Yeah, that's going to be Miami. You know who we met? Who?

Matthew. Matt Smith. Matt Smith. Who plays Philip. He's very good and also very sexual energy. You can tell. You can tell. Very sexual energy.

With us, we were like, are you hanging on us? He literally goes. He's one of those. He's one of those. He's one of those straight men that is so secure. So secure. That they can flirt with anyone. Matt's Mickelson from Hannibal is men that is so secure so secure that they can flirt with anyone that's mickelson from panables like that oh really oh yeah just like he doesn't care who wants to fuck him it's like if you want to fuck him that's good it's sort of infuriating

though yeah i think i was wearing something and he goes to me like it suits you and i was like my basement flooded bedroom eyes at both of us yeah Well, you know, he's got sexual energy. He does. And I think it's interesting because, I mean, I really love the way their relationship is portrayed because they really get to the carnal center of Elizabeth. And I've always, actually, almost all my characters are pretty carnal.

But you always knew that woman was getting rogered regularly. Yeah. Really? I think so. And she made it, I mean, but she's you always knew that woman was getting rogered regularly yeah really I think so and she made it I mean I think she made it very clear

from her hat selection and her clothing choices that she liked it a little rough I think she made it very clear by a yellow hat she wore to Ascot

in 1978 that told us she liked it in the poop shoot. And she liked it when he pulled her hair. That was in 1981. We're going to see her on her last day. In Westminster Abbey. And I remember going, that brooch says you like nipple clamps. And I don't know how kinky they got, but to sustain a marriage that long oh come on he

was screwing around she could not screw around but i think she knew what she was getting she got a big greek stud and she you could tell she wanted them yeah and he made it and he said you just got to give it to me regularly yeah yeah i'll be fine yeah and um and i i like the way they portray their love affair they portray that whole you know that Philip he couldn't possibly be he wouldn't be loyal ever

but I think she knew but I think now I'm thinking about who is going to be my Philip I think they're gonna get this is a difficult question someone with a sharp nose. Who's playing Philip now? Who's

playing Philip in the Olivia Colman? I don't know if they've cast... They probably have. You know Miss Helena is playing Margaret. Helena Bonham Carter is playing Margaret. That's a good choice. It is good. Wacky. I think Helena resembles Claire Foy more. Yeah, the facial structure.

I think she might have to have her jawline smashed and rearranged. Yeah, we might have to get facial reconstruction surgery. Sure, sure, sure. I think that Helena can't play Elizabeth because her instincts are too quirky and wacky. Totally, totally. No, she can't play Elizabeth. But I'm just saying in terms of resemblance. And then Olivia looks like, what's her face?

Kirby. Vanessa Kirby. Vanessa Kirby, yeah. Would it be wrong for Liam Neeson to be my fellow no I wouldn't

Liam would be great that would be amazing that wouldn't be against the law I'm trying to think of someone with a gonter face a gonter face right right

someone like that's a good that's a good one oh god maybe like a not like a Colin Firth I was gonna say like a Pierce Brosnan

but he's not gone what am I saying he's also I don't to say like a Pierce Brosnan, but he's not gone. What am I saying? No. He's also... I'm not a fan. Okay, you know what? Let's go with Liam. Liam's a great Philip to you.

I think he'd be good. I think we'd be good together. But it doesn't matter. As long as you're... I agree. I agree that you'd be good together. As long as you're Elizabeth, that is all I want.

You have the Windsor face. I remember... It's true. I grew up in a large family. I grew up in a... My mother was a very big monarchist. And you know, in Canada, you know, it's true, I grew up in a large family. My mother was a very big monarchist. And you know, in Canada, you know what it's like. I mean, she

literally is, she's the ruler of Canada. She's on her money. She's our monarch. She's the queen. And I can't help it. I feel love for her. I love her. And I know when she dies, I'm not working that day. That's it. Oh, the whole economy of the UK is going to shut down for a week. It's just not working that day. That's it. Oh, the whole economy of the UK is going to shut down for a week.

It's just not. Really? It's just not going to happen. Yeah. It will take me a while to get over it. Do you care about the weddings? Yes. Yeah.

Ms. Markle, she's acceptable? Oh, yeah. Love her. I think she's the breath of fresh air. Yes, exactly. But I don't know what we're talking about with Queen. I'm just saying that you must play her. Oh, yeah.

And it's funny, because I grew up in this family where my mother would have a picture of her family had a family in the foyer like of our family was small and then a huge picture of the royal family and and this whole time people would the kids in the hall mark particularly would say you look like the queen i go i don't know and so mark wrote this piece called it's a fact which is about this little red-haired girl that runs into the camera and goes, it's a fact. And they would do these crazy little fact things. And Mark said, it's a fact.

And the first one was, it's a fact. The queen doesn't know her ABCs. So I know. Ew. One. Ew. A, B, C, D. X, Q, Y.

Seven, 11. Ew. Just a field coat. And it would be all like and so they said so they made me

as the queen it was a one-off and I went into the makeup with Judy and Jerry our makeup and hair wizards and they

Judy Jerry was making me up and she was like what's happening she was she didn't have to do she said I don't have to do that much.

And then Judy came over with the wig and they put it on. And then, you know, Jerry and Judy are like, look in the mirror. And I was like, this is weird. And I mean, and Mark goes, I knew it. I knew it. And I walked out of the trailer. I'm even getting chills thinking about it. Because it was such a, I remember the moment so clearly.

And everybody looked and went, and i remember the crew looking and going it's too much and i'd never even practiced my voice i'd never there's a lot of kids in the hall it came up out as we were getting made up we didn't we wouldn't even know how we were going to play anything like sure and i remember the voice came instantly and i went hello hello and i just started waving to people and I instantly became her. And it was a- An immaculate conception. It was a transformative moment.

And I went, I have a bone structure. Yeah. I look like the lost Windsor. And I remember we had this little piece and then we had some extra time. This almost never happened. We were, it was on a film shoot, one of our film shoots.

And then we improvised this whole piece that came out of nowhere, which is where the queen walks the little red-haired girl off the end of a dock, gives her a bunch of stones, says, jump out, there's guild at the bottom. And I was trying to drown her

because the queen always drowned redheads because they were bad luck. Oh my God, I didn't know. And it was all improvised and it became the closing credit sequence. And then from then on, I was off and running. So, I mean, wow. And it's the only celebrity impression.

It's the only one. The only one that's ever been on the show. Here's something I pulled from, like the Edward thing. Was that a real rumor that he was gay? Oh God, yeah. Yes? Okay, I'm not familiar with the real thing. It that a real rumor that he was gay? Oh, God, yeah. Yes? Okay, I'm not familiar with the rumor.

It's still a rumor, is it not? Really? Oh, yeah. Because then I thought, like, wow, the scandal that would erupt if one of the royal family was gay, like what that must feel like. Well, it couldn't have happened. Yeah. No.

Oh, there was lots of rumors. He worked for Andrew Lloyd Webber, was it? Who was? No, Andrew Lloyd Webber was- Oh, I don't know this. Someone like that. No, he wasn't gay. Some musical guy. Sure, sure, sure. Might have been S Andrew Lloyd Webber was I don't know this someone like that no he wasn't gay some musical guy

sure sure sure might have been someone I don't remember because there was an Andrew Lloyd Webber joke in the sketch yes it must have been

then but you know no they couldn't he could not have been gay I mean but I who knows what he is

I don't know but that was absolutely a rumor yeah that reality if that's true though that reality of any royal family never realizing that about themselves that's true though that reality of any royal

family member realizing that about themselves that's to be absolutely that's going to happen yeah of course it will i mean once we as soon as we get a lesbian president we are going to get a gay member of the royal family i don't know yeah i mean they're already there but they'll be no i know i know they are already there they're there that's so sad oh yeah we can't even think about that anyway should, should we move on? We should move on to, I don't think so, honey.

This is our segment where we take one minute to rail against something in pop culture. That's just, we hate it. We hate it. We hate it. We need to talk about it passionately. So you're going to see us do it. Okay.

And then we'll ask you to do one as well on, on a topic of your, of your choosing. Okay. Oh, perfect. Scott Thompson's going to do it. I don't think so. Now, do you have one that you you to do one as well on a topic of your choosing. Okay. Oh, perfect. Scott Thompson's going to do one. I don't think so. This is huge.

Okay. Do you have one that you want to do or should I go? You should go. You should go. This is Matt Rogers' I Don't Think So Honey. I don't know where this one's going to go. I'm just going to leave with my heart. His time starts now.

I Don't Think So Honey, people at the bar who get their drink and still stand at the bar so that no one else can get there and i'll tell you something it's it's you straights oh because it doesn't really happen at the gay bar because we have some sense sure and also you want to go off and talk to people you straight people are so boring you have nothing more to do than create drama by standing at the bar i'm at northern territory yesterday in greenpoint it was a zoo it was just and not because it was crowded it was a zoo because it was animal-like behavior and it's animal-like behavior it's not dignified to get your cocktail and stay there move out of the way terrence oh says i need to i don't know the name i picked because i need to

order a drink and i can't do it from back here and guess who else you're pissing off the fucking bartender who's busting their ass who also wants to get a new piece of client ass right there up at the bar so she can have a new drink roll through this is a system honey and if you're not ready to operate in the system you're not ready to be in this establishment I don't think so honey and that's one minute wow you are raising your fist a new piece of client robin is is down. Robin agrees. Wow. Well done. You got to cycle out.

Okay? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And neither of you can say nothing because you know I'm right. What does cycle out mean? Cycle out. Just like if I'm here. If you're the bartender, I say, hi, can I get a gin and tonic?

I get it. We do the transaction. I cycle out, honey. I turn around and I walk my ass to another part of the bar that's how that works so that the homo behind me aka me can go up there and order a drink

I'm gonna do one that might be a little a little controversial but it's about the culture alright here we go this is Bell and Yang's I Don't Think So Honey and it's time starts now i don't think so honey and his time starts now i don't think so honey people distributing this fucking clip of john mccain shooting down that crazy old lady at his rally for calling obama an arab and his whole rebuttal is no he's a decent man who we

just happen to disagree i mean yes that was an okay response but people are lionizing this in this way that is that is just trying to like lionize the bare fucking minimum first of all the implication i remember so clearly this day in 2008 i watched matter that night she made a joke about how well an arab an arabic person and a decent family man would never intersect in the same person right like yeah like that's the implication it's shitty like john mccain is whatever i'm not one of these people who's dancing on his grave but i'm saying let's go through different things in the highlight reel and say this is like he in terms of policy he pushed this through why go why focus on this interaction that really just should be the norm instead of like heralding it as this gorgeous

manna from the political gods and that's one minute i agree with you i think the whole thing interaction that really just should be the norm instead of like heralding it as this gorgeous manna from the political gods and that's one minute i agree with you i think the whole thing is getting blown out of proportion literally on both sides because it because it's like a people are i mean we're a day out he passed away yesterday recording this on the what 26th like he like people every news site is like wow remember, remember when John McCain did this? And I'm like, yo. But on the opposite side, I think that to insinuate that he's saying, no, it's not an Arab. He's a good person is also going too far.

I think that I think it's going too far. And I get that people come for me or whatever. But the thing is, he in a moment of this woman saying this person's a bad person they're an arab he in a political moment where everyone was watching said to her no this is not he's not a bad person it's that's the energy so people acting like him saying he's not an arab he's a good person that is not what he's saying and i think on both sides we need to fucking cool it sure i mean like i'm i'm just saying like there's but like i'm trying to like pull the tension backwards like everyone's building this thing up i think that there's i think it's so unfortunate that we're fixating

on this clip as his lifelong legacy when there's other things that's what i'm saying is that there's this fixation on the clip and i'm saying it's not that remarkable. I mean, it's good that he shot her down. But I'm saying, like, find gold, McCain. Like, talk about the things that he did in his political life and not just this interaction that he had with a crazy person. I think they should have focused on how gorgeous he was when he was younger. I mean, we're losing focus. Yeah, truly. I mean, let's bring it back to what's really

important his looks I agree with you I think it's this whole thing of like assuming we can have a smarter intelligent about this when we're

not dealing with smart people we're dealing with Americans yeah sorry bitch you notice we kept quiet we kept quiet

yeah continue to keep quiet okay this is Scott Thompson's I don't think so honey do you have a no I don't no I mean no because I don thompson's i don't think so honey do you have a no i don't

no i mean no i'm because i don't really because no god you don't want to do one this is this is okay you know what well i just say there's a few things that i wanted i i've had such a good time and i feel like this might derail me listen because i mean i know what i want to talk about i know it's going to be controversial all right. Okay, okay. I'd rather save it for tonight when you're going to see it on stage. Okay, good. So this is historical. We've never had a guest decline, which we honor. Is it terrible? No, no,

no, no. It's honorable. It's honorable. I think that the only, exactly, it's an honorable thing for me to not do that. I have too much respect for you to demand that you follow my fucking rules. Who the hell am I? stupid queer i think i can't believe i said no no i think that's punk rock is what a trailblazer truly i'm not even i'm not even being facetious like this is we will honor this like but i will say any other guests would be like no you have

to do any other guest that comes on here and says they don't want to do one, you can go fuck yourself. Go fuck yourself. You're not Scott. You know, I mean, of course, I railed about other things during the interview. You certainly did. You railed and railed. And this is a thing where the first person gets all the attention. You know what?

Not the second. Not the third. There will never be a second or a third. It's only Scott Thompson. You know what? What is it you say? I don't think so, honey. You know what, honey?

I don't think so, honey. Here's what Scott Thompson. You know what? What is it you say? I don't think so, honey. You know what, honey? I don't think so, honey. Here's what I hate. Is you go on a podcast and the host asks you, oh, they do a bit that they always do all the time. And it really works. And everybody that comes on our show does it. So you're going to do it. I hate that.

You know what? I don't want to do your stupid bit, honey. Okay? It might work for you, but it ain't working for me. Okay. But you know what? Here's the thing, bitch. But you know what? Here's the thing, bitch. Here's the thing, bitch. I've given you one hour,

23 minutes, and 22 seconds, and now you're asking me to do something that you guys have been working on for months and months and months. You've worked all the bugs out, and now you're gonna throw me under the bus with your bit? I don't think so. And guess what, bitch?

You just fell in the trap because you just did it. And it was a slay. And that's the new generation coming up. And so outsmarting you and outwitting you. Damn you! I am Spartacus! I

do not count that as an I don't think so because I want this to be canon. Scott Thompson did not want to do one and we honored that. Time's up. Our time is up. I'm just saying time's up because it's a good thing to say. Because it's a good thing to say.

Wow. I mean. This was very meaningful. This was a very meaningful interaction. It was great. A great time guys. Truly, truly wonderful. Much more fun than I thought I would have. Really? We get that a lot well when you're called I mean I knew you were fun but I did when you

called me honorable I was like oh it's gonna be an honorable no ew ew ew you know that was a bad choice of words on my part that I

yeah you fucking sucked I sucked I hate you Bowen you're bad that was bad words it was just our way of just blowing smoke up all of our asses

okay yeah wow the first two minutes of this podcast really was that i was like you know i'm happy i didn't have grow up with you because i would have been really overwhelmed i got stupid twink yeah so disingenuous i got called an aging twink the other day and i was like you go fuck yourself no no but wait that's the best kind of twink aging twink okayink? Okay. Yeah. I gotta love myself. Wow. Right, Joe? You do.

You'd fuck me, right? Thank you, Joe. Gorgeous. Oh, yeah. If you have advice for Joe, if you have tips for Joe to live his best life, let us know. I'm telling you, that litter separator is... It's something. It's working for someone.

It's working for someone. Joe, check out Scott's album, Not a fan uh the re-release of the book buddy babylon and uh next time he's in new york please check him out if he's doing again april deluge april deluge april deluge uh scott thank you so much thank you very much here we go what if god was one of us it's Sunday. Just a slob like one of us. Is it slob or snob? I think in Austin Powers it was slob. Slob like one of us.

Bye. Forever. Dog. This has been a Forever Dog production. Executive produced by Brett Boehm, Joe Cilio, and Alex Ramsey. For more original podcasts,

please visit foreverdogpodcasts.com and subscribe to our shows on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Keep up with the latest Forever Dog news by following us on Twitter. I'm Julian Edelman. I'm Rob Gronkowski. And we are super excited to tell you about our new show, Dudes on Dudes. We're spilling all the behind-the-scenes stories, crazy details, and honestly, just having a blast talking football.

Every week, we're discussing our favorite players of all times, from legends to our buddies to current stars. We're finally answering the age-old question, what kind of dudes are these dudes? We're going to find out Jules. New episodes drop every Thursday during the NFL season. Listen to dudes on dudes on the I heart radio app, Apple podcasts,

or wherever you get your podcasts. On Thanksgiving day, 1999, five year old Cuban boy, Elian Gonzalez was found off the coast of Florida. And the question was, should the boy go back to his father in Cuba? Mr. Gonzalez wanted to go home and he wanted to take his son with him. Or stay with his relatives in Miami? Imagine that your mother died trying to get you to freedom. Listen to Chess Peace, the Elian Gonzalez story, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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Presented by Capital One, founding partner of iHeart Women's Sports. Hey, I'm Jay Shetty and I'm the host of On Purpose. My latest episode is with Jelly Roll. This episode is one of the most honest and raw interviews I've ever had. We go deep into Jelly Roll's life story from being in and out of prison from the age of 13 to being one of today's biggest artists. I was a desperate delusional dreamer. Be a delusional dreamer. Just don't be a desperate delusional dreamer. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Trust me, you won't want to miss this one.