Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang - The Top 10 Stores

Episode Date: March 4, 2024

In this BONUS episode, Matt and Bowen give you their top ten stores.  This bonus episode is available early for subscribers to Big Money Players Diamond on Apple Podcasts: https://apple.co/lasculturi...stasSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 This fall on Bravo. It's time to turn up. Think you've seen it all? I don't think you've been a good friend to me lately. We're friends like that, who needs enemies? You ain't seen nothing yet. Cheers to being Germanic. With the Real Housewives of Potomac.
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Starting point is 00:00:21 You broke the rules and now you're here getting upset. Watch all new seasons on Bravo or stream it on City TV+. On Thanksgiving Day, 1999, five-year-old Cuban boy Elian Gonzalez was found off the coast of Florida. And the question was, should the boy go back to his father in Cuba? Mr. Gonzalez wanted to go home and he wanted to take his son with him. Or stay with his relatives in Miami. Imagine that your mother died trying to get you to freedom. Listen to Chess Peace, the Elian Gonzalez story on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. talking football. Every week, we're discussing our favorite players of all times, from legends to our buddies to current stars.
Starting point is 00:01:28 We're finally answering the age-old question, what kind of dudes are these dudes? We're going to find out, Jules. New episodes drop every Thursday during the NFL season. Listen to Dudes on Dudes on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Look, man. Oh, I see.
Starting point is 00:01:47 Wow. Bowen, look over there. Wow, is that culture? Yes. Oh, my goodness. Wow. Las Culturistas. Ding dong.
Starting point is 00:01:56 Las Culturistas calling. Well, thank you again to all of our Big Money Players Diamond subscribers for listening to the special bonus ep of our list, our top 10 list. You guys are the definition of not like other girls because you actually pay a little bit more
Starting point is 00:02:12 to get this episode earlier, which makes you different from so many people out there in the public. And we thank you for putting your dollar into our great cause. Oh, I meant, well, see, I was a little bit more transparent. Yeah, well, let's be
Starting point is 00:02:28 really transparent. When you get money, what do you do with it? You go... Donate to charity. I was going to say shopping, girl. I think you're lying. I was trying to align with you because you said you're putting your money towards a great cause, and I said you're putting money in our coffers.
Starting point is 00:02:43 I was trying to marry those two ideas. I'm not even going to hide. My tracks from this podcast, some of it goes to charity, a lot of it goes to shopping. And that really sort of brings us to what this episode is, what's on the table in front of us. This bonus episode, as it were, this top 10. Yes. This is, I guess it, as it were, this top 10. This is, I guess it's really capitalist culture, huh? It's capitalist culture. Money is one of the great collective hallucinations.
Starting point is 00:03:14 Whoa. It's a LARP. A live action role play? It's a live action role play. That's what money is at the end of the day. And that's what capitalism is. And would you say that the 10 stores we're about to talk about,
Starting point is 00:03:32 which will make up the top 10 stores, this is some place where you'd like love to go LARP? Well, the store is where you LARP the most within terms of money. Oh, yeah. When you hand the cashier the cash, the car. That's a transaction. When there's the transaction, that is the ultimate LARP.
Starting point is 00:03:56 If you're scanning at the self-checkout kiosk, that's LARP. When I buy something, it can only be described as a transaction. You know? I think so. Yeah. I think I know. Now, talk about
Starting point is 00:04:14 the experience of going to the store because I don't want to, we're not going to talk about any e-commerce on this episode. We're not talking about add to cart. No. How about push the cart? I'm talking about good old-fashioned walking in.
Starting point is 00:04:32 I'm talking about stepping into an environment where there's pieces and really thingamabobs aplenty. Just like look at this trove. That's what I want to say when I'm going into a store. Sometimes I know exactly what I want to say when I'm going into a store. Sometimes I know exactly what I want. A lot of the stores that we're going to be talking about, you really do go there
Starting point is 00:04:49 with a purpose. Right. Sometimes you do just want to go into a store and say, what's going to happen? What's going to happen? I could walk out of here
Starting point is 00:04:58 penniless. I could walk out of here penniless, but I could walk out of here with something new. Something new. Something new. Something that really lifts my spirits. Retail therapy is a thing, y'all. I learned during the pandemic it works.
Starting point is 00:05:13 And if it weren't for stores, you would never have a lyric like, So I went to Neiman Marks on a shopping spree. And on my way, I grabbed Solly and Mia. If there were no store, then Blue Cantrell would have no way of coping with the way her man was wronging her. Well, that was actually a retail therapy anthem. 1,000%.
Starting point is 00:05:39 And that's when you go, maybe stores are good. It's actually real culture number 30 because of Lou Cantrell and her retail therapy anthem you go maybe stores are good you might even work in a store if you listen to this podcast
Starting point is 00:05:56 you might even work at the store you might be listening to this podcast right now while you're working at the store in which case I have to tell you you are breaking the law of your workplace. I know it's not above board that you listen to podcasts while you're at work. Honey, especially if you're in Florida,
Starting point is 00:06:11 I know DeSantis has passed legislation saying people who work at stores cannot listen to these faggots on Los Culturistas. 100% he said that. With his chest. With his chest. And today we're counting down the top 10 stores. And I'm ready to get into it.
Starting point is 00:06:28 Let's get into it. Because I think that definitely everyone's going to be feeling the instinct to want to go out and, you know, pick up a new item. Yes. And I just want to get into it so that people can start turning their wheels about just where they want to go. And let's activate the economy, y'all. Let's... Give back. Pretend like the heiress tour is in your town and you're buying up all the beads for the friendship bracelet.
Starting point is 00:06:50 Pretend you're Taylor. Pretend you're Taylor. It's so noble that Taylor Swift and Beyonce, you know, that part of the virtue of their tours was that they, you know, added money to the economies of these cities. Number 10.
Starting point is 00:07:02 Hudson News. Listen to me right now. There is a communal experience at the airport and it is either walking past the Hudson News and saying,
Starting point is 00:07:13 hmm, is there anything in there I want? And deciding against it. Or there is the really just, everyone knows what it's like to go in there and ultimately buy a water.
Starting point is 00:07:23 And that's it. A $7 water. Yeah. That you need. Picking one bag of Werther's Originals what it's like to go in there and ultimately buy a water and that's it a seven dollar water yeah that you need picking one bag of worthers originals from a wall of worthers originals picking up magazines a magazine a dramamine a lifestyle white a fucking Benadryl you ever have those little sandwiches they sell at the Hudson News? no way absolutely not
Starting point is 00:07:55 I have too much self respect see I guess I don't because I've actually eaten one I've had a tuna salad sandwich from the Hudson News there is any other place at the airport to get a sandwich. You're so right. But I think what had happened was, tell me if you're feeling me,
Starting point is 00:08:13 sometimes you show up to the airport just a little too late. You got to grab and go. Right. And that's really where the Hudson News thrived, for my grabbers and goers. My grabbers and goers. But I just think if you keep walking two gates down,
Starting point is 00:08:28 there's going to be a little... There's going to be something a little better and even maybe less crowded. All this to say is why Hudson News is number 10 on Top 10 Stores Lost Couch. Number 9.
Starting point is 00:08:44 Pizzeria. This also is known as Pizza Store. This is a store you go to buy pizza. And other Italian delicacies. Garlic knots. Garlic knots, such as little calzones. Such as different types of pizza. I'm talking about pepperoni.
Starting point is 00:08:59 I'm talking about square. What? Why did you? Rebecca, why did you burst? What's going on? You itch-balled. Oh my God. You what? I didn't eat a What's going on? You itch-balled. Oh my God. You what?
Starting point is 00:09:06 I didn't eat a tissue. I thought she was itch-balling. I thought she was itch-balling. No, she was just simply sneezing. She didn't burst out laughing. She sneezed out snot. Can we say that was disgusting? Disgusting.
Starting point is 00:09:18 That was awful to watch. If you're listening to this, she's currently going to the restroom, being so courteous. Anyway, pizza. When you go to the pizza store, also known as Pizzeria, do you think, let's go, I'll take one of everything? Let me tell you something. I often think that, but you can't really leave with everything.
Starting point is 00:09:42 I mean, you just can't eat that much. Though I will say that the leftover value... There's a lot of compelling choice in a pizzeria. And I put to you, what's your favorite pizza? Supreme. I want pepperoni.
Starting point is 00:09:58 You want it all. I want a pepper. I want a mushroom. I want maybe some sausage if I'm in a mood. If I want a little protein, extra protein. I want a mushroom. I want maybe some sausage if I'm in a mood. If I want a little protein, extra protein. I want a red onion. I want it heavy on the tomato sauce. You're like Sharpay.
Starting point is 00:10:14 You want it all. I'm like Ashley Tisdale. Yeah. In her most iconic performance, I think, to Sharpay. That's true. What about you? The truth about me that you don't know is that I really will just be eating a regular slice. Two regular slices.
Starting point is 00:10:35 I mean, I think that that's... Here's the thing about pizza. Sometimes it... Okay. In the beginning of time, there was no pizza, right? And so then all of a sudden there was one day pizza. And I think because we crushed it so hard in the invention of pizza, that we actually often try to like reinvent the wheel
Starting point is 00:10:54 in terms of things that need to be on it. When what we had to begin with already was like a creation that was worthy of its own standing in the culture. You know what I mean? Like a lot of people here think it's boring to maybe just say, I just want to have regular slice of pizza. But what I would say is like just stripping everything away. If you took away the knowledge that there is this culture of pizza and there
Starting point is 00:11:16 is so many types of pizzas, you would be way, way, way happier to just like, except what we have. It's in front of you. Pizza is so great by itself. And I get that you're supreme. I guess we're
Starting point is 00:11:31 coming from opposite ends of the spectrum. Duality. That is this podcast. That's very this podcast. I'm thinking of pizza as an open-faced hot sandwich. 100%. Wait, what?
Starting point is 00:11:46 Do you know what I mean? Open-faced hot sandwich. I guess because of the bread of it all. It's bread, sauce, toppings, like things that you would maybe put in a sandwich. Girl, you are going to be out here on your own if you're trying to say pizza is a sandwich. I'm saying the beautiful innovation of pizza...
Starting point is 00:12:04 Don't yell at me. I will take whatever tone I want saying the beautiful innovation of pizza. Don't yell at me. I will take whatever tone I want. The beautiful thing about pizza, it is a large, flat disc. Yeah, come back in. She's wiped her nose. No, it's okay. Pizza is a large, flat disc.
Starting point is 00:12:17 And that is the innovation of it. He's trying to... Sorry, I just want to fill in back up. So basically what's happening on the podcast at this moment is Bowen is trying to convince me that pizza is an
Starting point is 00:12:28 open-faced sandwich. A hot, open-faced sandwich. Like a tostada? Excuse me. Excuse me. If you were to put another slice of pizza
Starting point is 00:12:40 face down on top of a face-up slice of pizza, is that not a calzone? Is that not a sandwich in essence? But is a calzone? Is that not a sandwich in essence? What is a calzone? A sandwich? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:12:49 It's things encased in bread. You know what you sound right now? Crazier than a soup sandwich. You sound crazier than a soup sandwich right now. And think about eating a soup sandwich. It would be a lot like pizza. It would be a lot like pizza. It would be a lot like pizza. Which is so crazy to me.
Starting point is 00:13:07 And our engineer is literally doubled over right now because he thinks what you've said today here so far, and we're at number nine, is some of the craziest shit I've ever heard. We're here to talk about the store experience of Pizza Store. Talk about what it's like, what the vibe, what the right vibe is when you walk into a pizza store. First of all, I want guys
Starting point is 00:13:28 with dough. Guys with dough. First of all, if you're if you work at a pizza store and you are so fucking hot and I want you to breed me. Oh. Now listen, the second thing. When I think about the smell of a pizza store, I'm so happy inside. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:44 I have to sing a song. What? What song? The pizza song. Pizza is my boyfriend. Pizza is a god. Pizza is my sleigh on the weekend. Pizza's a relaxing thud.
Starting point is 00:14:02 Taylor should do more of that in the song. She should go, relaxing thought. Relax. If Taylor came out with a song called The Pizza Song. It would be huge. If you think that Taylor Swift, if she released a song called The Pizza Song, and if you don't think that would be one of her Billboard Hot 100 number one hits,
Starting point is 00:14:20 you'd be deeply mistaken. That will be the biggest song of all time. She would tear, eat, slay, and prosper be deeply mistaken. That will be the biggest song of all time. She would tear, eat, slay, and prosper. And prosper. The big four. That's why pizzeria is number nine in our list of top ten stores.
Starting point is 00:14:34 Lost culture. And I have to say, just the discourse around pizza made me so happy. Are you gonna have pizza today now? I think so. Me too. Oh my god. Number eight, Wegmans. Wegmans. Go on.
Starting point is 00:14:49 Wegmans is elevated grocery shopping. Say that. Trader Joe's, you have to be in the right space for it. Can I say something? It's not 2011. Sorry to you, Jace. Bowen is so shook, disturbed, distraught. I'm trying to be diplomatic and say that
Starting point is 00:15:10 Trader Joe's is not an all-the-time situation. No. Wegmans is an all-the-time situation. Here's what I got from Wegmans recently. Diet Coke. Yeah, you're wanting to do that. A box of 20 frozen corn dogs. What? And it's the perfect snack.
Starting point is 00:15:35 If I'm coming home from a long day at work, if it's like three in the morning and not a lot's open delivery wise, I'm too tired to cook, but I'm never too tired to pop a cold, hard corn dog into the microwave for one minute exactly. And then it's cooked to perfection? And then I drizzle mustard,
Starting point is 00:15:54 and then I take a little finger bowl, put ketchup and mustard, mix it into a special sauce, dip it in that. I'm in heaven. You should do a corn dog talk show. Absolutely. Because you know how there's chicken shop date?
Starting point is 00:16:09 You know how there's hot wings challenge? What's it called? Hot ones. Hot ones. You should have a corn dog show. And it's just vibes. It's not even chicken shop date where it's like, oh, look at us in this chicken shop.
Starting point is 00:16:24 It's not even hot ones where it's like, oh, look at us in this chicken chop. It's not even hot ones where it's like, oh, they get hotter. This is a challenge. We're sitting on a big couch eating a hot corn dog. And what is a corn dog if not a sandwich on a stick? That's from WandaVision. That's from WandaVision. All this is why Wegmans
Starting point is 00:16:40 is number eight on top 10 stores. Lost Coach. Number seven. Best Buy. Still kicking. Kicking ass. is number eight on top ten stores Lost Coach number seven Best Buy still kicking kicking ass I have so many amazing memories
Starting point is 00:16:52 in the Best Buy such as buying a charger I feel like everyone needs a charger everyone needs you're making fun of Best Buy and I actually really don't no I'm not
Starting point is 00:17:00 what the fuck are you talking about you started off the sentence you were so noxious I have so many special memories at Best Buy, and I was going to say yes, my sister. And then you took a hard left into, I love buying chargers from Best Buy.
Starting point is 00:17:12 Fuck off. Here's my memory of Best Buy, of walking over from when my mom was at the Costco next door. I would walk over to Best Buy when she was busy doing her shopping. I would go to the Dance Dance Revolution pads in the middle of the store and have dance competitions with the employees there to Sandstorm, bitch.
Starting point is 00:17:32 To fucking Kylie Minogue. Which was really the number one. People, this was what was happening. This is where I learned my performance instincts. Okay. People would start to gather. Yep. I can see this in my mind's eye.
Starting point is 00:17:43 Christmas time, when everyone was at Best Buy, I was the star of Best Buy because I was, picture 15-year-old me with braces, throwing his legs around next to the fucking 32-year-old goth Best Buy
Starting point is 00:17:57 employees of the mid-aughts. And I was kicking their asses, wiping the damn floor, I'm sorry, the damn DDR pad with them. Do you think that when they saw you came in, their heart sank? Because they knew that they were in for defeat? Bowen's here. Did they know your name?
Starting point is 00:18:13 No, they were just like, that little Asian kid is here to fucking... Sweat and stomp. Sweat and stomp. Would you get incredibly sweaty doing it? Yes. It was my idea of exercise. I didn't quite know my way around the gym. I think you were right of exercise. I didn't quite know my way around the gym. I think you were right about that.
Starting point is 00:18:26 I didn't really know my way around the gym. And part of me selling it to my parents, they would never buy it for me, but I was like, I'm going to go exercise, mom. I best buy. I think one of the common misconceptions about Dance Dance Revolution
Starting point is 00:18:39 is that it's not exercise. Oh, no. I think it is exercise. And I think that you proved that. They had a calorie counter. There's a workout mode in DDR2 where you can dance to whatever song and it would show you a completely off figure,
Starting point is 00:18:54 but they'd be like, you burned 200 calories dancing to Can't Get You Out of My Head or whatever. I want to ask you, so a lot of people, they ask the question of what was the first CD you ever bought? Speaking of Best Buy, do you know
Starting point is 00:19:09 or could you guess what the last CD you bought was? Oh my God. This is an interesting because the last CD I bought must have been with the purpose of burning like um not burning it reverse burning or whatever you call it uploading it to your itunes to put
Starting point is 00:19:32 on your ipod right right can i tell you what i think it is what blackout by britney spears whoa what was yours i think that if I had to guess what the last physical... Oh, no, I know, I know. But go, go, go, go, go. What? Say. I had a car rental somewhere. I forget where. But I didn't have...
Starting point is 00:19:55 I didn't bring like a Bluetooth thing or whatever. I didn't bring like an aux cord adapter thing. So I bought 25 by Adele on CD to put in my car. In my rental car to listen to. I think that if I had to actually say what was the last physical CD I bought, it had to be one of Kelly's albums because I probably said to myself
Starting point is 00:20:15 I'm going to stream up to help her numbers. I have to go to the store and buy the CD. So I'm going to guess that it was all I ever wanted. We both love our Vegas queens. Yeah. That's beautiful. And all this is why Best Buy is number seven on the top 10 stores.
Starting point is 00:20:33 Lost coach. The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City are back. I love that. I love that. Oh my gosh. Welcome. And last season's drama was just the tip of the iceberg. You're recording us?
Starting point is 00:20:52 I am disgusted. Never in a million years after everything we've been through did I think that you would reach out to our sworn enemy. We were friends. How could you do this to me? I don't trust her. The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, Wednesdays at 9 on Bravo or stream it on City TV+. On Thanksgiving Day, 1999, a five-year-old boy floated alone in the ocean.
Starting point is 00:21:17 He had lost his mother trying to reach Florida from Cuba. He looked like a little angel. I mean, he looked so fresh. And his name, Elian Gonzalez, will make headlines everywhere. Elian Gonzalez. Elian. Elian. Elian. Elian. Elian Gonzalez. At the heart of the story is a young boy and the question of who he belongs with. His father in Cuba. Mr. Gonzalez wanted to go home and he wanted to take his son with him. Or his relatives in Miami. Imagine that your mother died trying to get you to freedom.
Starting point is 00:21:51 At the heart of it all is still this painful family separation. Something that as a Cuban, I know all too well. Listen to Chess Peace, the Elian Gonzalez story, as part of the My Cultura podcast network, available on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Cheryl Swoops, WNBA champ, three-time Olympian, and Basketball Hall of Famer. I'm a mom, and I'm a woman. I'm Tarika Foster-Brasby, journalist, sports reporter, basketball analyst, a wife, and I'm also a woman. And on our new podcast, we're talking about the real obstacles women
Starting point is 00:22:33 face day to day. See, athlete or not, we all know it takes a lot as women to be at the top of our game. We want to share those stories about balancing work and relationships, motherhood, career shifts, youhood, career shifts. You know, just all the s*** we go through. Because no matter who you are, there are levels to what we experience as women. And T and I, well, we have no problem going there. Listen to Levels to This with Cheryl Swoops and Tarika Foster-Brasby, an iHeart Women's Sports production in partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment.
Starting point is 00:23:10 You can find us on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Presented by Elf Beauty, founding partner of iHeart Women's Sports. Number six, Record Store. So this sort of speaks to exactly what we were just talking about. I would say that record store and Best Buy were very much, it's not a redundancy, it's that they're very closely tied. I think this was a dead heat in terms of who was coming in at number six. I think that the idea of the record store sort of speaks
Starting point is 00:23:37 to another type of store that's going to come in a little bit later and that you really go in for the experience and I will say some of the coolest stores I see in New York, in LA area, is like a hybrid record store slash coffee place. Totally. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:23:54 There's a really cool place in Greenpoint, like in North Greenpoint, around where I used to live, which is like half record store, half coffee place. And also, if you think there's not a venue in the back for standup night, you'd be wrong. And also, if you think there's not a venue in the back for standup night, you'd be wrong. And honey,
Starting point is 00:24:06 if you don't, if you think there isn't a place to get a fucking barbershop cut at the record store, coffee shop, standup venue. 100%. You'd be deeply mistaken.
Starting point is 00:24:16 Deeply sorely. You know that we shot my video for Everything You Want featuring Muna at a record store that was also a bar that also had a stage.
Starting point is 00:24:25 Thank God because that video had a stage. Thank God because that video turned out amazing and also that is the perfect place to shoot a music video where you need different kinds of sets.
Starting point is 00:24:32 100%. We got there and we were like, and it was that moment, Bowen, of like, can you believe we have this space?
Starting point is 00:24:37 And that is true of so many record stores across the globe. Thank you to Amoeba. Thank you to Rough Trade. R.I.P. Tower Records. R.I.P. Tower. We do remember you. We you to Rough Trade. RIP Tower Records. RIP Tower. We do remember you. We remember you fondly.
Starting point is 00:24:49 And all this is why. This is why record stores are number six on top ten stores. Lost Cult. Shout out to Twist and Shout in Denver. I think it's still around. Maybe it isn't. I hope so. Number five. Lord and Taylor. Talk about this because I don't really have any real connection
Starting point is 00:25:05 to Lord and Taylor so this is sort of like my Wegmans yes Lord and Taylor was a place where my mom would take me
Starting point is 00:25:13 to go shop it was often like so Lord and Taylor was I guess like a little department store where they just had I wouldn't call it
Starting point is 00:25:21 like a ton of fast fashion except like kind of wood like it was a lot of... You'd go there to buy a duster. You'd go there to buy some cheaper t-shirts. You know what I mean? Like Lord & Taylor. If you know, you know.
Starting point is 00:25:35 Sure. But Lord & Taylor... Sort of like Nordstrom. Right. And this is what I was going to bring up, which is, why did Lord & Taylor make the list and not Nordstrom? And I don't want to challenge it.
Starting point is 00:25:47 I just want to, I just want your perspective on what makes Lord and Taylor exceptional enough to make the list. And can I say why? Yes. Can I respond directly to you?
Starting point is 00:25:53 I'm asking. I think it's because we made this list very quickly, seconds before we started recording this, because Becca said we had to do a bonus episode. You're peeling back the curtain.
Starting point is 00:26:01 And that's just the truth. That's just the truth. No, I know. Is that we just recorded with Tina Fey, and then we were actually asked very nicely to please do our bonus episode. And that's just the truth. That's just the truth. No, I know. Is that we just recorded with Tina Fey and then we were actually asked very nicely to please do our bonus episode.
Starting point is 00:26:10 that we're so late. Yeah, because this episode is very late. It's very late. Becca asked us so nicely but then she edgeballed. We thought she edgeballed
Starting point is 00:26:18 but then she actually sneezed and snot came out. Yeah, she sneezed on the beat and the beat got sicker. Beyonce all on his mouth like Becca. Have you ever heard that?
Starting point is 00:26:30 Has anyone ever done that? Beyonce all on his mouth like Becca. Beyonce all on his mouth like Becca. Do you hate it or do you like it? I mean, I love Beyonce
Starting point is 00:26:37 so I love her. There you go. And Beyonce is in your mouth all the time. All right. There you go. So all this is why Lord and Taylor
Starting point is 00:26:44 is number 5 you know who's loving this list my mom Countess Luanne just tagged me in a story I love that what's this gonna be you wanna look
Starting point is 00:26:52 let's just look oh the picture it's me asking a question about whether or not she's coming back to Rony well then cause I was at her
Starting point is 00:27:01 famously after the show she's not crushing the rumors not beating the allegations not beating those returning allegations. Number four. Costco! Now, a lot of you may be wondering why this didn't make...
Starting point is 00:27:13 Four might be a low placement. I think that to say this is like... This is almost a snub. This is almost a snub, but also, you know what my theory is on why it was snubbed? The card of it all. The membership of it all snubbed um that the card of it all the membership of it all you're right the tears of it all
Starting point is 00:27:29 gatekeeping it's gatekeeping literal gatekeeping literal highlight keeping let me look at the receipt and quickly do a little eye of your shopping cart I didn't know I was on trial just walking into the store the surveillance state is with us.
Starting point is 00:27:46 Oh, yeah. This 70 year old woman is like eyeing me down. Yeah. It's already, the real world is already socially stratified in such perverted ways. And for me to be reminded of that, if I go into Costco and if
Starting point is 00:28:02 I want to apply for a membership, oh, there's this tier, there's the gold, the executive. I don't want to hear it. I want to go to the store and just shop. Can I say something? I'm calling you in. This has gone to a very negative place. No. This has gone to a very
Starting point is 00:28:18 negative place. I love Costco. I know you do, sister. And I know that what you're trying to say is that they should make it easier to be more equitable. It should be cardholders, non-cardholders. And even that's gatekeeping. So let's just say to those in charge,
Starting point is 00:28:33 we want to share in the joy of this store. Everyone wants to come to Costco. This is actually my thing. I wrote a sketch about Costco with Kim Kardashian, by the way, where we sang about the virtues of Costco. They didn't say a peep.
Starting point is 00:28:49 They didn't send us one Beef Wellington. They didn't send us one $2, $1.50 hot dog. Again. That's crazy to me. This has gone to a very negative place. I don't want to be entitled, but we put you on the map. See, that's crazy. Kim and I did that.
Starting point is 00:29:07 This is crazy to me that you would say that you and Kim Kardashian put Costco on the map. Kris Jenner didn't do shit. Well, I don't think... Tina Nose didn't do shit about Costco.
Starting point is 00:29:17 All right. I don't care. No one gives a shit that they go to Costco. Their moms, of course, they're going to Costco. I'm here, a young gay man... Say it.
Starting point is 00:29:24 ...with the most famous woman in the world. Okay. Boosting your signal. And nothing. I agree with you. It's a travesty. I do want to say though, just to say how much we love Costco,
Starting point is 00:29:37 because I do think this, this will be closer to their heart. You know what I mean? Like if you want to actually reach out and touch somebody, you have to do it with kindness. you have to do it with kindness. You have to do it with kindness. And can we say, Costco, you have given us so much,
Starting point is 00:29:49 such as samples of food. There is no other store that is doing samples like Costco. There is no other store that is doing... All the produce is in the coldest room in the world
Starting point is 00:30:02 where you have to walk through the plastic fucking petals that hang down from the door. A parking lot, more like parka, is what I need to be wearing in that aisle. Bitch. Eight. Eight. What's four plus four? Eight. How many letters
Starting point is 00:30:17 in devoured? Eight. How many continents should there be? Eight. Eight. That's what would the eight continent be North Pole hun you think Kimberly Locke
Starting point is 00:30:30 should release a song I think I landed on the eighth continent yeah yeah yeah yeah
Starting point is 00:30:39 I don't know if you should do that I think the song's fine how it is and that is why Costco is number four on top 10 stores. Lost College. Number three.
Starting point is 00:30:50 Thrifting. Thrifting. Thrift. I'm sorry, thrift. Thrift stores. Thrift stores, yes. You feel you're a part of the problem? You feel you're a part of the problem doing fast fashion?
Starting point is 00:31:00 I'm talking to you, the reader. You can change. Go to a thrift store today. Greta Thunberg implores you. Thunberg, sorry. You know who would be so thrilled with you? Chloe Sevigny. Chloe Sevigny. She famously
Starting point is 00:31:15 thrifts her little behind off. If you want to be a fashion icon like Chloe, get it together, hun. Head to the thrift store. Toss a bunch of stuff together. You don't know if it's going to be iconic or not. Right. This is the most, this is some of the most ethical shopping you can do.
Starting point is 00:31:32 100%. But the reason why it's number three and not two or one, what were you laughing about? I'm laughing at you being like, this is so ethical. Oh, then I looked at number two. We'll get to that. Don't worry. Yeah, I know, I know, I know, I know.
Starting point is 00:31:46 The only note I have for thrift stores. Okay. Let's do something about the smells. Okay. I know this is all secondhand, and this is all, we're going to great lengths to make sure that this is all presentable
Starting point is 00:31:58 and that people want to buy and repurchase these things. I think the barrier of entry for a lot of people is the smell. Have you ever donated to a thrift store? Absolutely. If you don't think
Starting point is 00:32:09 that when I moved apartments, I went to the Goodwill in Queens because that was the closest one. And then I did four trips to that Goodwill with bags of clothes. Good for you.
Starting point is 00:32:22 You have another thing coming. I've done repeat trips to Out of the Closets. Oh, we love Out of the Closet. We love Village Discount in Chicago. We love L Train Vintage in New York, specifically Brooklyn. Can I give a peek behind the curtain? So all, speaking of my
Starting point is 00:32:37 video earlier, everything I wore for my music videos and my styling for the album that I released last year called Have You Heard of Christmas was all thrifted by our friend Melissa Lehman
Starting point is 00:32:50 Melissa Lehman who is a thrifting icon at Mulsimouse M-U-L-S-Y-M-O-U-S-E Best vibes in a person Incredible vibes Incredible thrift talent Yes
Starting point is 00:33:00 and dressed me down with all thrift stuff and I will say as a result of that experience working with her on it, I've been very into thrift stores as a concept and I am not going to lie, I used to be that girl doing a lot of fast fashion and trying to cut
Starting point is 00:33:16 back, cut back, cut back. We're learning, we're learning. Always learning, like a sponge. That's what they do. And that is why thrift stores is number three on top 10 stores. Lost Colt. Number two, Apple.
Starting point is 00:33:29 I'm going to give you the floor here because I think that you, you more than anyone I know, know their way around an Apple store. I know exactly where the things
Starting point is 00:33:38 are hidden. Oh, check the tables, the display tables. There's a hidden drawer there. Treasures unsold. Sorry, I didn't match your pitch. You were maybe coming for me a little
Starting point is 00:33:50 for saying the ethics of Apple Store is a little questionable. For sure. They're going carbon neutral by 2050 or something. We love Apple. And there might not even be a world by then. But they're making inroads. I will say one thing that frustrates me, Apple, is...
Starting point is 00:34:08 So I have the new iPhone here, right? The charger... USB-C. USB-C, okay. So can I actually ask my sister this question? Because I feel, like I said, you might have the answer. If anyone does in my life, it's going to be you. So there's the USB-C.
Starting point is 00:34:23 Now this is the new charger for the new iPhone. Then you go into your car. And some cars now have USB-C. But is there an option for USB that plugs into USB-C? There are some cords that go USB-A
Starting point is 00:34:40 to USB-C. I've got to find those cords. They sell them. Go to a Best Buy. Go to the Hudson News. I'm trusting you, cords. They sell them. All right. Go to a Best Buy. Go to the Hudson News. I'm trusting you, girl. I have them. I have multiple cords. Do you think I can go to number 10 on this list
Starting point is 00:34:50 and get something I can't get at number two? They sell it at number two. Or they also sell the adapter. All right. I get very confused and turned around with the USB-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D of it all. Excuse me? I just get very turned around
Starting point is 00:35:04 when it comes to different USB variants. I don't know why life can't just be more simple. Can I say that? That's the point of USB-C is that everything is going to be USB-C in the near future. But this whole journey started, I'm going to say
Starting point is 00:35:19 even seven years ago when people were like, we're making the switch to USB-C. It's going to take a minute. Okay. And we're in this transition phase now. I'm feeling that discomfort right now in my 2024 Black Hyundai Elantra.
Starting point is 00:35:34 I'm going to check in with you in about three years, I'm going to say. You're going to be like, I don't remember, I can't live without USB-C. Trust me. Does Highway got a new car?
Starting point is 00:35:46 No. Got a new car. What color? Black. Amazing. Hey, be careful. People might get in thinking it's an Uber. Well, listen.
Starting point is 00:35:53 Better that than my red car. I know. You know, I was driving a red Hyundai Elantra. You called it Wanda. We named it Wanda, the Scarlet Witch. You can understand why. Wanda Maxima. And I was getting tickets a lot
Starting point is 00:36:03 because I think the car was too ostentatious. And I remember that's what Joel Kim Booster said when I picked him up one day. He said, I don't like this car. And I thought, that's very rude, Joel Kim. And then he said, well, it's not your personality. It's too ostentatious. And then I had to really understand
Starting point is 00:36:20 the fact that he doesn't think I'm ostentatious. There's nothing wrong with being ostentatious. I wish he thought I was more ostentatious because I felt the car was very my personality. I loved that car. I was very sad to see it go. The Apple Store...
Starting point is 00:36:35 What's your favorite memory of Apple Store? All the geniuses I've met. Yeah. Some really good people there. Unique. Loving. Some really good people there. Unique. Unique. Loving.
Starting point is 00:36:48 That's what you are. Tech superstars. That is why Apple Stores is number two on top 10 stores. The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City are back. I love that. I love that. Oh, my gosh. Welcome.
Starting point is 00:37:10 And last season's drama was just the tip of the iceberg. You're recording us? I am disgusted. Never in a million years after everything we've been through did I think that you would reach out to our sworn enemy. We were friends. How could you do this to me? I don't trust her.
Starting point is 00:37:27 The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. Wednesdays at 9 on Bravo. Or stream it on City TV+. On Thanksgiving Day, 1999, a five-year-old boy floated alone in the ocean. He had lost his mother trying to reach Florida from Cuba. He looked like a little angel. I mean, he looked so fresh. And his name, Elian Gonzalez, will make headlines everywhere.
Starting point is 00:37:52 Elian Gonzalez. Elian Gonzalez. Elian. Elian. Elian Gonzalez. At the heart of the story is a young boy and the question of who he belongs with. His father in Cuba. Mr. Gonzalez wanted to go home and he wanted to take his son with him.
Starting point is 00:38:08 Or his relatives in Miami. Imagine that your mother died trying to get you to freedom. At the heart of it all is still this painful family separation. Something that as a Cuban, I know all too well. Listen to Chess Peace, the Elian Gonzalez story, as part of the My Cultura podcast network, available on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Starting point is 00:38:36 I'm Cheryl Swoops, WNBA champ, three-time Olympian, and basketball Hall of Famer. I'm a mom, and I'm a woman. I'm Tarika Foster-Brasby, journalist, sports reporter, basketball analyst, a wife, and I'm also a woman. And on our new podcast, we're talking about the real obstacles women face day to day.
Starting point is 00:38:57 See, athlete or not, we all know it takes a lot as women to be at the top of our game. We wanna share those stories about balancing work and relationships, motherhood, career shifts, you know, just all the s*** we go through. Because no matter who you are, there are levels to what we experience as women.
Starting point is 00:39:16 And T and I, well, we have no problem going there. Listen to Levels to This with Cheryl Swoops and Tarika Foster-Brasby, an iHeart Women's Sports production in partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment. You can find us on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Presented by Elf Beauty, founding partner of iHeart Women's Sports. This is number one. And here's the thing.
Starting point is 00:39:44 We just had our guest, Tina Fey. She left the studio and we said, you know, we're doing the top 10 stores. What's the number one store? And she said on three, one, two, three, Target. This is, I mean, you must have all seen this coming. Especially by the time we got to number five and you were like, they haven't said Target yet.
Starting point is 00:40:02 You know, one of the great things about Target too is they're so seasonally on top of it if you walk in there like when the clock strikes midnight on like even like halloween thanksgiving like they somehow switch it they magically wave the wand and it is all the holidays are there and everything is there and like if you want a reef um what it is wreath wreath why did i think it was through an f in there i don't know because Reef? What? It is Reef. Reef. Why did I think it was Reef? You threw an F in there.
Starting point is 00:40:28 I don't know. Because I'm so addicted to marijuana, I love Reefer so much. Reefer. Up top. You understand, Target is one of those places that helps you understand
Starting point is 00:40:38 the passage of time. Thank you, God. It is the sundial of our culture. Yeah. And never going anywhere good luck they have made some missteps recently with their pride stuff and they've caved to fucking
Starting point is 00:40:55 these crazy fucking we're gonna get in trouble for this aren't we I don't care they can take this what was it that they took all the pride stuff down because of fear because of fear they have been a little bit spineless and other take this what was it that they took all the pride stuff down because of fear because of fear um they have been a little bit spineless um in other in other similar ways around these sort of like um
Starting point is 00:41:13 let's acknowledge that queer people exist well here's the thing is it's like so when a corporation like let's say like target or something like does the pride thing and they're like we are all gay like and that becomes very much the vibe like we are all gay like there's pride everywhere and it becomes Target it's like that's one thing that people can choose to have a complaint about and then when they take it all down they're like well you guys are spineless
Starting point is 00:41:37 and it's like okay we're just trying to keep people safe because we have to ignore the reality of the fact that there's a lot of ongoing and escalating violence in this country towards, of course, all minority groups. But also, I'm not defending Target. I'm saying, is it a sort of, you know, damned if they do situation? And do we care that much at all that there's a rainbow above like the reef's isle? I guess.
Starting point is 00:42:03 I guess to me what reads is like. I guess. I guess to me, what reads is like, What does pride mean to you? What pride means to me is that level beyond tolerance, acceptance. Yeah. What gets me is that pride. You can't like,
Starting point is 00:42:21 it's like the heel turn, the reneging on it is like, is sad. Yeah. And that's all. I never hated Target for having pride stuff. No, you can't like it's like the heel turn the reneging on it is like is sad yeah and that's all I never hated Target for having pride stuff no I absolutely love Target
Starting point is 00:42:31 no matter what and I understand anyway what can you get at Target you can get oh my god lunch first of all lunch
Starting point is 00:42:38 Starbucks often if you're lucky a plastic bin for storage not for nothing but sex stuff sex stuff a toaster pills if there's a CVS in there. There's a Target in Chicago that I go to that I think I've been to on four different occasions,
Starting point is 00:42:54 four different years to buy lube and lube only. Amazing. Because Chicago is one of those cities where you kind of have a guy. You know what I mean? Chicago... Be fucking. It's one of the most fucking cities in the world. Chicago, be fucking. And that's actually roller coaster number 99.
Starting point is 00:43:15 Chicago, be fucking. And luckily, there's targets all over Chicago. It being a major city. This being number one on the list. And they have lube. And that's a huge part of why Chicago be fucking. Is that it's a plentiful, bountiful, I would say New York is not super,
Starting point is 00:43:35 the targets aren't thriving in New York City, the way that they are in Chicago, the way that they are in Los Angeles. They're thriving in LA for sure. I know this, but in Chicago, I think that's a sleeper target town. 100%. And you and I have both been
Starting point is 00:43:49 on separate scenarios, of course, but we've both been plowed in Chicago. Absolutely. I mean, I have some of my most iconic sexual tales. Yeah. And my book is coming out called The Sexual Tales of Matt Rogers.
Starting point is 00:44:06 It's not what you think. It's much darker. It's more of a psychosexual thriller. It's actually fiction. But no, yeah, we've gotten it in Chicago. Was Chicago meth for you? Chicago was
Starting point is 00:44:22 not meth for me. Where did you accidentally do meth? Meth was Queens. It was at home. So if you don't know and you're sort of just joining the podcast now and not years ago. I accidentally did
Starting point is 00:44:32 meth once. Bowen actually did meth once and had what you described as acrobatic sex with a man for hours. Acrobatic sex, moving furniture around.
Starting point is 00:44:40 I took the G train home. Wow. Yeah. And that's not a euphemism. No. Oh, no, no, no. No GHB. Absolutely not.
Starting point is 00:44:50 Never. Never. But you could probably buy G at Target, to be honest. Someday. They got it all. Hey, Target, here's how you correct the pride stuff.
Starting point is 00:44:59 Sell G. I want to see poppers on the shelves, too. If you're going to sell lube, why not sell poppers too Put the G next to the Metamucil So that the gays can shit Stop pretending like it's not what it's for It's like when I'm in the
Starting point is 00:45:13 You should just call it the butt aisle Have everything that you need for your butt You know what I'm saying It's like why should I have to go all the way over there You know what I'm here for I'm dying Here's what's in the butt aisle Yeah tell me the way over there. You know what I'm here for. I'm dying. Here's what's in the butt aisle. Yeah, tell me.
Starting point is 00:45:30 Charmin. Dude wipes. The lube. Fleet enema. Fleet enema. Which I've been using. Don't use it too much. Right. But I'm saying like you get the hype about the fleet enemas. I know. It's going to destroy my stomach lining. I know. but I'm saying like you get the hype about the fleet enemas but it's not it's
Starting point is 00:45:46 I know it's gonna destroy my stomach lining I know yeah what else is in the butt aisle um some Metamucil
Starting point is 00:45:54 yeah yeah yeah I bet even at Target you could get some toys I mean is that crazy to think no I think that's a bridge to far I don't think they sell like
Starting point is 00:46:02 you can get butt plugs and stuff at Target I don't know about butt plugs. How do you know this? But massagers. Because you walk through the aisles, you're looking for your tampons and it's in the same section.
Starting point is 00:46:11 The tampons, the lube. Got it. And the sex toys. If there's a pussy aisle at Target, we need a pussy aisle. Period. I wholeheartedly agree. There's a pussy aisle. There's a pussy aisle.
Starting point is 00:46:25 There's a pussy aisle. There should be a pussy aisle. That's real culture number 50. Hey, Target. If there's a pussy aisle, there should be a pussy aisle. And that is why. That is why Target.
Starting point is 00:46:33 Number one. Is number one on top 10 stores. Last culture. Well, I'm super happy that we decided to put this definitive list together as quickly as we did because we questioned nothing
Starting point is 00:46:43 and that is how you know you've done something right. It's when something just flows out of you and you just need that sort of prompt from someone like Producer Becca. What happened was, in many ways, Producer Becca was the fleet enema. She got right up our butts.
Starting point is 00:46:58 She tenderized the lining. She got right up our assholes and said, you need to do an episode. And then we flushed out this list and now we're ready to fuck. I can't wait. I don't know when I'll do it, but hopefully soon.
Starting point is 00:47:13 You have two weeks off. I'll go to Chicago and get fucked. That would be wonderful. They have everything you need. Well, thank you so much for joining us on yet another amazing bonus episode. I just know there'll be more. Yeah. Stay tuned for the next month.
Starting point is 00:47:31 Wait, wait, I never ever stopped with a song. Oh, say, can you see by the dawn's early light? I have such a crush on him. What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming. To hear more of that, listen to the National Anthem of America. It's written by Francis Scott Key. You were calling him F. Scott? F. Scott Fitzgerald.
Starting point is 00:48:05 No, F. Scott Key. Francis Scott Key. Key were calling him F Scott? F Scott Fitzgerald. No, F Scott Key. Francis Scott Key. Key! Bye. Bye, the king. I'm Julian Edelman. I'm Rob Gronkowski. And we are super excited to tell you about our new show, Dudes on Dudes. We're spilling all the behind scenes,
Starting point is 00:48:25 stories, crazy details, and honestly, just having a blast talking football. Every week. We're discussing our favorite players of all times from legends to our buddies to current stars. We're finally answering the age old question.
Starting point is 00:48:39 What kind of dudes are these dudes? We're going to find out Jules. New episodes drop every Thursday during the NFL season. Listen to Dudes on Dudes on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On Thanksgiving Day 1999, five-year-old Cuban boy,
Starting point is 00:48:57 Elian Gonzalez, was found off the coast of Florida. And the question was, should the boy go back to his father in Cuba? Mr. Gonzalez wanted to go home and he wanted to take his son with him. Or stay with his relatives in Miami? Imagine that your mother died trying to get you to freedom. Listen to Chess Peace, the Elian Gonzalez story, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
Starting point is 00:49:23 or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Sheryl Swoops. And I'm Tarika Foster-Brasby. And on our new podcast, we're talking about the real obstacles women face day to day. Because no matter who you are, there are levels to what we experience as women. And Tia and I have no problem going there. Listen to Levels to This with Cheryl Swoops and Tariqa Foster-Brasby, an iHeart Women's Sports production in partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment.
Starting point is 00:49:54 You can find us on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Presented by Capital One, founding partner of iHeart Women's Sports.

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