Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang - "The Wedding" (w/ Rachel Bloom)

Episode Date: April 12, 2017

Oh honey, it's time! RACHEL BLOOM joins Matt & Bowen in the studio for one of the most ICONIC cultural discussions of the SPRING SEASON. At the request of Matt & Bowen, Rachel relives the day she won the GOLDEN GLOBE. Matt reveals what his GLOBES PREP would look like. Bowen describes how close he came to MED SCHOOL. All three look back on their days as young comedians at NYU. Plus, Matt tantalizes Culturistas listeners with breaking news involving a FUTURE GAME SHOW APPEARANCE. Gird your loins! This is 1 hr 30 mins of RELENTLESS culture!LAS CULTURISTAS HAS A PATREON! For $5/month, you get exclusive access to WEEKLY Patreon-ONLY Las Culturistas content!!https://www.patreon.com/lasculturistasCONNECT W/ LAS CULTURISTAS ON FACEBOOK & TWITTER for the best in "I Don't Think So, Honey" action, updates on live shows, conversations with the Las Culturistas community, and behind-the scenes photos/videos:www.facebook.com/lasculturistastwitter.com/lasculturistasLAS CULTURISTAS IS A FOREVER DOG PODCASThttp://foreverdogproductions.com/fdpn/podcasts/las-culturistas/ Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

On Thanksgiving Day, 1999, five-year-old Cuban boy Elian Gonzalez was found off the coast of Florida. And the question was, should the boy go back to his father in Cuba? Mr. Gonzalez wanted to go home, and he wanted to take his son with him. Or stay with his relatives in Miami? Imagine that your mother died trying to get you to freedom. Listen to Chess Peace, the Elian Gonzalez story, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,

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Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Cheryl Swoops. And I'm Tariqa Foster-Brasby. And on our new podcast, we're talking about the real obstacles women face day to day. Because no matter who you are, there are levels to what we experience as women. And T and I have no problem going there. Listen to Levels to This with Cheryl Swoops and Tariqa Foster-Brasby,

an iHeart Women's Sports production in partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment. You can find us on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Presented by Capital One, founding partner of iHeart Women's Sports. Hey, I'm Jay Shetty and I'm the host of On Purpose. My latest episode is with Jelly Roll. This episode is one of the most honest and raw interviews I've ever had. We go deep into Jelly Roll's life story from being in and out of prison from the age of 13 to being one of today's biggest artists. I was a desperate, delusional dreamer.

Be a delusional dreamer. Just don't be a desperate, delusional dreamer. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Trust me, you won't want to miss this one. Hi, everybody. Today's show is brought to you by Casper.com. Receive $50 towards any mattress purchase at www.caspertrial.com forward slash Las Culturistas. And by warbyparker.com. Get a free five-day home try on it. www.warbyparkertrial.com forward slash Las Culturistas. Five pairs,

five days, 100% free. Las Culturistas is brought pairs, five days, 100% free. Las Culturistas is brought to you by the Forever Dog Podcast Network. Be sure to check out more original comedy podcasts at foreverdogpodcast.com. My grandma and your grandma were sitting by the fire. My grandma told your grandma, I'm going to set your flag on fire. Talking about henna, henna, henna. Aiko, aiko, ande. Jagamo, fino, andane.

Jagamo, fino, andane. Ding dong, Las Culturistas calling. Hey Bowen, you know what I think would be fun? What? Parasailing. You know what else I think would be fun? Um, what? Um, another episode of Las Culturistas.

Come on, I'm down for parasailing and another episode, honey. We can't afford parasailing, but you know what we can afford to do is another episode of Las Culturistas. I'm really excited about this. This is a great day. This is a great episode. Um, God, this guest. What a fucking iconic.

Icon. I don't think I saw... You know what? She laughs in her chair, but there was not a more iconic image than her floating on that fucking pretzel. Absolutely. And you knew it.

And you knew it. You knew it. You knew it. We're muzzling her now, but she's going to speak to this later. You guys, she's the writer, creator, executive producer, star of Crazy Ex-Girlfriend.

Golden Globe Award winning. TCA Award winning. And you know what? I think the TCA is a gag. I love the TCA. And we'll get into it. But listen. Come on.

Come on. Give it up. It's Rachel Bloom. Hi. Rachel, you fucking knew what you were doing with that pretzel. Yeah. And you know who else did is Mark Webb, who directed it. He was like, that pretzel is going to be iconic. And then, but then we, all right.

Here we go. Give it up. Will she just wolf down some toast? Right before I started this, you have to know, it's been a long day. And I got stuck on the R train and I got here and demanded food from Ronnie. But in such a gracious way.

Ronnie's our new tech. Everyone, little taps for Ronnie. Hi, taps for Ronnie. And he looks amazing in what I believe to be a chambray. And Ronnie is paying

tribute to the new divas. Ronnie was playing some Carly Rae Jepsen, Charlie XCX, Grimes, Kalani. Ronnie. Did you do that on purpose?

Was your playlist on purpose because you knew there were some gays coming in here no it was just this week you know what you have great taste Ronnie is Grimes a diva no I mean

you know we can't even refer to Carly Rae Jepsen as a diva I'll quote Gloria Estefan here she said this at the 1997 Divas Live she goes you know I don't belong up here

if anything I'm a divette they're the divettes the divettes but Rachel just ate what did you just scarf down like some toast Diva's Live. She goes, you know, I don't belong up here. If anything, I'm a divette. They're the divettes. The divettes. But Rachel just ate, what did you just scarf down? Like some toast? Toast and almond butter.

Love it. How did it taste? How was it? It was good, but now my stomach is like, it actually has things to process. So the gases are coming up. Yeah. And which is fine.

Relatable. Relatable. The iconic gases. Which ties back into the food that she wrote into our hearts on. Yeah, the pretzel. Oh, so Mark Webb, who directed that, was like, we need to make the pretzel look amazing,

and that whole thing cost a ton of money. And then when they tested the pilot, the dials went slightly down during the West Covina number, which broke Mark's heart. Because I think, look, when you test a show, it's random people coming in who don't know what they're about to watch

so when they were like oh fuck this is a musical I'm from Anaheim I hate that shit come on it's like yeah it is

get on board also I thought potentially it went down because people didn't like the image of a pretzel see that's the like I thought that could have been it

or was it that you stepped out of the car and then the dial went down uh just the whole the second i started singing the musical number well the thing is those people i i'm willing to say those people don't matter yeah well but then on the flip side like once they were used to the music they were like all right this is a musical uh and there was apparently like this like big I wasn't allowed to be at the testing because they didn't want actors there but there was apparently this like big biker dude

who they were like going around asking like what they liked about the show this is when we were still with Showtime and the biker dude was like she's on a journey he gets it he gets it yeah Joseph Campbell he mentioned Joseph Campbell I rewatched the pilot recently it is so incredible.

It's great. And I fucking love the show. I want to say this season's finale is, I think, not even being hyperbolic, I think it's my favorite season finale of anything. Wow. Thank you. I mean, thank you. It was great.

Because it really, it did what a season finale should do, which is like, it tied up enough, and then it gave you so much more to look forward to. Because now you know we're getting the new iteration of Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. Yes. Oh my God, you guys get it so hard. Oh, please. My co-creator, Aline Brosh McKenna, who's brilliant, wrote The Devil Wears Prada. Oh, come on.

We've praised it on this show many times. Quoted about a fourth of the movie on the podcast. She's amazing. And I have to say, being a boss now, being a boss makes you feel for Miranda Priestly. The one line of like, details of your incompetence do not interest me. That's, yeah.

I really feel that. And I've told her that and she's like, oh yeah, you sympathize with Miranda when you're a boss. And those are all things that I could picture Aline is so some of the things Miranda says are like things Aline Aline isms

Aline isms I was walking through work today and then like and we're doing this like spring campaign that has florals and just what pops in my head was for spring groundbreaking Alina has a pillow in her

office that says that someone got her a pillow at Etsy. By all means, move at a glacial pace. You know how it thrills me. There's so much. Also, I must meet her one day because I have to ask her if the that's all was...

Because we were talking about Meryl and we were talking about how any actress looks at that script and they see that's all and they deliver it like, that's all. But Meryl Streep fucking takes that and goes, that's all, and they deliver it like, that's all. But Meryl Streep fucking takes that and goes, that's all. And I wonder if that was Aline's intention when she wrote that,

for it to be this small dismissal, or if that was, and how she felt when Meryl interpreted it that way. If I had to guess, I would guess that is her intention, because Aline likes writing for people being natural and small and especially the way that Miranda is she's so quietly dismissive she never really

she never explodes she said that I mean she is the best things to say about Meryl Streep and was basically Meryl Streep is a brilliant improviser too and the last line of go was a direction in the script because sometimes Aline style of writing is she'll put stage directions that seem like they should be lines or whatever just to give intention. And so Meryl actually just went, go! And they're like, oh, that's great.

Come on. Leave it. Leave it. Wait, I want to talk about the finale. So the finale, Aline wrote the finale and directed the finale. She directed it too? Uh-huh.

Wait, was that her first episode that she directed? No, she directed the last season finale too, season one. Oh, great, great, great. Yes. She's brilliant. And, great, great, great. Yes. She's brilliant. She's brilliant. And there's just so much there. And also, like I said, so much to look forward to.

The last images of it are just great. Okay. And I remember pouring over all these, just like the AV clubs, the vultures, those recaps. Yeah. And the AV club pointed out, I don't know if this is intentional or not, but that last shot of just the four women, was that evocative of the craft or no? Okay, it wasn't. The weird thing is it wasn't and a lot of people

asked, but no, and I haven't seen the craft in years. I mean, I think what it was is evocative of things about women scorned getting revenge, which the craft obviously masters, but it wasn't a specific take on the craft.

But what a fun alignment anyway. Yeah. I mean, yeah. But it's like it just it turns that whole premise on its head, like on its head, but still like, yeah, it makes it work. Crazy ex-girlfriend. But now she's like going to destroy Josh. Because it meant something in the first season.

It meant something in the second season. And now it'll mean something new in the third season. Can you reveal this? And if you can't, no worries. Is Robert a thing in season three or no? Okay, oh my God. Don't say it, don't say it. Okay, oh my God.

I'm not, I won't, yeah. I won't reveal anything. But I just, I love it anyway. Just that whole, okay, that whole fucking thing and the finale was brilliant, I thought. Yeah. I don't know, I loved it. Yeah, we always knew from the beginning that she'd had some sort of affair with a professor. whole fucking thing and the finale was brilliant i thought yeah i don't know i loved it yeah we

always knew from the beginning that she'd had some sort of affair with a professor um from pretty early on because we were like this is not the first time she's gotten too into something there's no way that she just lived in a vacuum and never fell in love again yeah yeah yeah and so we've been waiting to do we were actually going to oh oh, I can say this. Yeah, because it's not happening anymore. I just realized this. We were going to open season two with Rebecca in bed, like cuddling someone, saying I love you. And her turning over and it would be Robert. And there would be a chyron that would say like six years earlier.

So it will be planted in the beginning to then come full circle. But then what happened was it just, there was so much else we had to do with the season. Robert wasn't pertinent until the end of the season because she wasn't being stalkery to Joe. Like we were going to maybe let it trickle out throughout the season and kind of have it be a slow burn, Breaking um yeah like you know where you see the teddy bear thing yeah but it it um we just had so much else to do especially getting greg out the door like yeah putting

robert flashbacks would have been like wait huh yeah like there it was just too much i also loved the misdirect of greg leaving and the shit and the shit show song and then coming back at the end and they get that amazing fucking tap number. Oh my God. Which, you know who fucking blows me away is Vincent Rodriguez. Like he, I didn't know he was such a dancer. And then I watched the second season and I'm like, not only just that tap number, but also that number where you visualize the ballet.

Fucking amazing. Vinny was working as like a musical theater dance guy. Wow. That's what he was earning. And it's funny because he seems like, at least to me when he's acting, like, oh, you are a serious actor. But no, he was on the tour of White Christmas. He basically worked as a dance guy and then became a dance captain.

He was the dance captain of Hunchback of Notre Dame in La Jolla. Like he. Oh wow. Primarily a dancer. Yeah he's a dancer. He's a dance captain. Okay. Okay you got your dancers

and then you got your dance captains. All right. Here we go. He is a dance. He is a captain of dance. A captain of dance. It's so funny

because he's not really like well there are elements of him that overlap with his character but he based the character kind of on friends he grew up with in Northern California. Oh fun, fun.

That's so great. I love that. So wait, hold on. I have a question about the show because I was thinking about this. So you have writers on your show. And then when the music comes in, now is that, does the writer of the episode have a hand in writing the lyrics or do you kind of like write the lyrics with Aline and Jack? The songs are pretty separate. Basically, all the songs are written by either me,

Jack Dolgen, or Adam Schlesinger, who also co-produces the songs with this guy, Stephen Gold. Generally, what happens is the songs come from, like Adam and I were just talking about this today, the songs will, nine times out of ten, come from me. I'll kind of spearhead the general direction of the songs but the the actual like writing of the songs it varies song to song right right and there have been songs that only Adam wrote there have been songs that only Jack wrote there have been songs that mostly like I

mostly only wrote although Adam ends up always getting credited because I write so much musical theater stuff and Adam is just so good at like the genre yeah yeah so i i was thinking about this because the first number is so like a musical theater yeah was there ever did you always want to go really into like specific genre just to vary it up or was there ever a version of the show that was like this is like a music this this lives in the world of musical theater what do you mean like for example like every song would kind of be like that like it was essentially like a broadway musical on screen in that kind of grand style or did you know we also want to do like a kind of

like um r&b song or like or sort of like this is going to be a rap number or like a very poppy like oh it was always going to be different genres because of because it was aline discovered me through my music videos which are all different genres number. it was always going to be different genres because it was, Aline discovered me through my music videos. Which are all different genres. Half of which are pop, exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So it was always going to be pop and, and yeah, I mean, the pilot is, I mean, the West Covina came before Sexy Getting Ready song,

but originally there was going to be, there was going to be another song called something like I'm Bad Shit Crazy For Your Love, which, which which which we replaced with sexy getting ready so lost i get it yeah i love it my favorite i i sing all the time dream ghost i listen to dream ghost all the time oh my god and michael hyatt who sings that song is it just her voice is unbelievable she's amazing yeah and also just amber riley and ricky

lake being on it is. Hey, they were like, we want to come on the show. And we were like, great. We have a part. Yeah. Oh my God.

Uh, math of love triangles is I think like all time. I'm really, really proud of that one. Yeah. Yeah. Oh my God. Anyway,

um, Rachel, we're, we're going to ask you, we ask all of our guests, what is the culture that shaped you? What is the culture that made you say culture is for me? Yeah.

I want to step into a cultural direction. Um, I i mean i'm just such a musical theater kid so musical theater culture i mean i met my best friend when we were both in um community theater production of crazy for you and he was holding court um dissecting rent as a 15 year old kid uh he's gay but we date it cause of course you gotta you gotta gotta do it you gotta

and so I just think musical musical theater culture really shaped me and then and then when I got into comedy sketch comedy culture

specifically like around UCB the kind of collaborative the collaborative theatrical nature of comedy theaters those Those two things. Lovely. Crazy for you is interesting because then you came full circle with that moment with the concert. And he was there. He was there? Wait I

so that was my I think that's I think it's a great I think that's one of my favorite shows and for a jukebox musical I think it's like pretty pretty solid. Oh yeah. I think it's great. How was the concert? What did you sing? It wasn't look it's so they said it was a staged reading we did the broadway show you just did the whole show oh i watched on youtube i saw that you guys doing the numbers no no we did we literally the uh laura fucking osnes laura and um oh my god oh my god

laura first name basis laura no yeah laura osnes Osnes. Yeah. And Tony Yazbek had the week before along with the dancers to learn it. And then a lot of us, a lot of us other principals came in the next week, but which gave everyone two weeks at most to learn an entire show. Oh my God. An entire show. I thought it was built as a concert. It's not. It was the show.

Oh my God. Okay. Yeah. That's amazing. Just with like concerty costumes. Let's let everyone know It was the show. Oh my God. Okay. Yeah. That's amazing. Just with like concert-y costumes. Let's let everyone know it was the show. Thank you. That they did.

It was the Broadway show. They full out. That's amazing. And then my number, I sang the song Naughty Baby, which was so fun. I mean, I had just come off of having very bad vertigo. Oh no. I was sick. And then my like inner ear nerves got swollen.

And so I was on like vertigo medicine, which is good because my number was me dancing on a table, being lifted in the air by a bunch of men. At Bryn Mawr, I was top of my class. All the boys were under me. Dirty lyric. Very dirty. Dirty lyric. I don't know the show.

I wish I did. Yeah. I mean, I have many questions. I had many questions about my character um yeah i had a lot of questions uh that's one number in the show right it is it is um naughty baby baby yeah i love that there were because it's you know it's written in this kind of old school style there they're literally the motive of my character was telling t Tony Asbeck's character like we're engaged and we're gonna get married and he's like no we're not I've never met you and so the justification

that I came up with was that they like kept hooking up and he kept like uh fucking her but then being like no but this isn't a thing and she's like but you're fucking me and and that one time she had a pregnancy scare uh but it's but it wasn't backstory it was wrong and then but like that that's and i think i told tony that one point i was like so i think what happens is they hook up and and she's like well we're getting married now and he's like no we're not but but but he kept fucking her because that's what people do. Yep. That is actually those men. And I came up with the idea that Bobby Child is not very good in the sack

that he was very very vanilla and that Jerry O'Connell player the guy who I end up with is like a fucking beast. Love it. So it was a happy ending. Really happy ending. Lovely. Really good for everyone. He just fucking he just fucking he just fucking gives it to her he just lays naughty baby gets it in the end yeah yeah there you go um so you

studied musical theater at college and also simultaneously were hammer cats nyu yeah director yeah now did you ever feel because i also have we're we're in a musical sketch group pop roulette and we kind of fuse the two as well like sketch comedy and musical theater or whatever but we have some friends who were also in cab 21 and like didn't discover comedy till later almost because they felt like they couldn't because the musical theater world is so different oh yeah did you feel ever like like how am i gonna like like you obviously had two strong interests like did you ever feel like that was very hard to like get satisfied and what you were doing absolutely all the time i mean i felt that um and i yeah i mean i didn't feel like i fit

in in the musical theater program i resented the fact that like a lot of musical theater is like not amazing and that a lot of it's dated and then but simultaneously although i loved hammer cats i felt like there was a lack of emotion yeah that was missing and i felt like i felt like when i first got into comedy this is all testament to also a testament to the people who were the directors at the time i felt like in order to go into comedy, I suddenly had to become a dude. I had to be like, suck my dick. That's so fair. It's funny.

I was just at NYU talking about this today, so it's fresh in my head, but I don't know if you knew this. I'll try to be vague. When I was young, I was going to be director of Hammercats my sophomore year. I do know this. I got involved in a love triangle with a couple of the older guys, some of whom were alumni.

Not my current husband, who is an alumni, but he's a different alumni. That's right. Hi, Dan. We love you. Hi. I love you so much. We never met Dan, but I love you, too. You've never met my husband? No, and I would love to. I think he's very funny. You've met my husband, right? Yeah, I've met Dan. We never met Dan, but I love you too. You've never met my husband? No, and I would love to. I think he's very funny.

You've met my husband, right? Yeah, I've met Dan. He started Dangerbox too. He started Dangerbox. I mean, you give social media love every now and then to each other. I'm laying my hands on your man.

I'm sorry. He's the best. He's the best. So anyway, I got involved in a love triangle. I was 19 years old. I lost my virginity to one of these guys

and then his other friends started hitting on me and again, I was 19 and basically, it was a whole kerfuffle where like they were all in like a comedy group together and basically uh I got removed as director and head writer of Hammercats that is which is which is which is a little thing called sexual harassment and then I was so then I was named like assistant director the next year by the people who replaced me. I was replaced with two men. And then I became like director senior year because like one of the guys quit because he wasn't happy. It was a whole thing.

Oh, yeah. That was a nightmare. It was, here's the thing. I should have, I should have quit. I should have. You know what? And I didn't because being on the sketch group was my identity in school and I loved comedy so much. But I didn't have to be on the sketch group to do comedy.

But I don't necessarily regret it because we created our own sketch groups. We created our new sketch comedy show every month. And it trained me and like when I and it trained me to write a lot. And it's how I got good at writing. But like, man, the lack of self-respect I had for myself in college makes me want to puke. You know, it's so interesting because you look back and you're like, man, what a warp situation. I went into my audition for Hammer Gats. I didn't do my hair and I made sure I wore a shirt with Heath Ledger as the Joker on it because I was like, I must be perceived as straight.

They will not allow me into that group. Were you on? No, you weren't on my senior year. No. You had just left. Graduated. But you were in the room for my audition. And I went in and I was like, and I look back at it and I was like, I can't believe that

I shone in that audition because I was being the opposite of myself. I played like very aggro, like dad character in those old, old auditions things, audition scenes I went to. And now it's like, I feel like what makes me special as a performer is so different than that but i was literally like cover fighting for my life to get on that group because i had just come out of the closet and i was like i must do comedy it's what i must do i had just been cut in the first round of danger box the day prior danger box is the improv group. And yeah, the, the last culture is this listeners have heard us talk about these groups before,

but this is, this is, we have hammer cats, family in the, in the room. So we must talk about it. This is a deeper layer. We haven't talked about this before.

Yeah. This was really hard because I was like, and it's still, when I got on the group, I was like, okay, at what point do I really start being myself? Wow.

And it was really tough. And then we continued to be objectified. Oh yeah. Do you remember when they threw us a wedding? at what point do I really start being myself? Wow. And it was really tough. And then we continued to be objectified. Oh, yeah. Do you remember when they threw us a wedding? Okay, I do. And we messaged you. Well, you sent us a message being like, You were like, what the fuck's with this wedding?

And we were like, here's what happened. Well, okay, how much do we want to? We can, I mean. Well, we're not going to name names, but. Okay, so here's what, you know. I mean, what happened was you were the, I mean, basically the only two gay guys on the two main sketch groups. And everyone was like, you guys should get married because you're gay.

There is this person who was involved in the comedy groups who has quite a lot of money who is eccentric. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And this person literally was like, we should throw them a wedding. And you guys were like, ha ha, right?

And then she, he, she, she, them, they, threw you a wedding. Like, spent money. Wasn't it a Jurassic Park themed wedding? It was a Jurassic Park themed wedding. And you know what?

Looking back on it, and then we were, of course, we wrote our own vows so bowen what was your how did you when did you did you know this was going to happen i had we knew that there was going to be an event i just i didn't know how much was going to go into it and what you have to understand is how humiliating that is despite the fact that you're trying to have fun with it exactly i said to bow and i'm like you know what like we have a sense of humor about this like and i think that's good right but at the same time like we both know this is fucked up right we're and we were like yeah but no one i think everyone else thought it was oh you know what i remember this my friend was there danny was there and he was

texting me updates and i was like wait a second what yeah right I remember being horrified so the full chronology of this is one of our friends like probably got stoned one night and made a fake wedding website through like the not a wedding a full wedding registry for us like honestly it was funny like in in the way that like haha gay is funny when you're admittedly 19 20 21 and not the best version of yourself. No shade to anyone at the time. Like, seriously, we're fine. Was there like a tenth of me that was like, oh, fuck, still dealing with this.

Like, still, this is like how you guys see me? Sure. A little bit. But like, I'm not humorless. I got that it was funny. The event, the like literal thousands of dollars that were being thrown into this event. Guys, thousands of dollars. At least one.

Bizarre. And honestly, at that point, I was like, okay, well, we have to at least have the opportunity to respond. So Bowen improvised, quote unquote, his vows because he was an improviser. You guys had to do a ceremony? Yeah, we did a ceremony. We walked down the aisle.

Bowen wore a veil. It was, yeah. Oh my God, it's all coming back to me. All these text messages are coming. Because I was in LA and I was like, what's going on? Yeah. Oh God. So then I wrote my vows and I was like, you know, this night is about so many things.

It's about love. It's about friendship. But mostly it's about money. Yes, I friendship. But mostly it's about money. Yes, I heard. And I thought it was so. Oh, I know this story. I thought I was justified. And then the person got very upset.

And I was told by the person that made the wedding registry that I had to make it right. And I'm like, let me tell you something. Didn't this person say you ruined the wedding? Or am I making that up? I don't really know what was said. All I know is that we had to then deal with this person's emotional tailspin. And I was like, you know what? This is ridiculous.

And their justification was they just wanted to do something nice. So Matt and I had to walk outside while they were sitting on the stoop, basically. Just like despondent. And then Matt and I were just like hey we just want to make sure everything is okay but also and I will never forget this Matt literally we were both everyone involved was very hammered and Matt just screams to the

person we didn't ask for this which is kind of perfect I actually does this person listen to the podcast? I have no idea you know what I reached out to this person recently to kind of mend fences

because I saw this person in a show and thought they were fabulous and you know I in a show? in a show? this person's an actor? it was an improv show and i reached out and i well that's not real yeah right it's just you know reacting which is acting but anyway um so

i reached out and was like hey you know what i think we've been through our ups and downs but i just wanted to tell you like that you were great i just wanted to at least like reach out and put a button on that because we had a weird moment after the show and I was just like, I don't really want to be thinking about this anymore. Like, like I said, I truly, I fucked up so many times when I was that age.

Like I sent Ness, maybe this is still me apologizing for it. Was older than you though. Yes. A year. But the thing is like, I just, it just meant something to me to reach out and mend that bridge.

And I think maybe, I think everyone had regrets about it. Did person say like oh yeah like i've thought about that and that was so weird they just kind of thanked me it's fine i you know what i don't expect that person to be the bigger person it's okay i think maybe they're you know it's just it's just it's all fine it's yeah but looking back on it i was like yeah that was a little bit of a fucked up night to begin with no no that was me at the end of the night to feel like I was the one who fucked up. That's gaslighting. Yeah, and it was a homophobic night.

It was a night of homophobia. It's the problem that happens. You know what bothers me? Because there are some women who really... I'm sorry, I am dealing with my stomach processing all of the toast I just ate. Yeah, no, it was like pains. So anyway. We'll take a break, Sam.

On Thanksgiving Day, 1999, a five-year-old boy floated alone in the ocean. He had lost his mother trying to reach Florida from Cuba. He looked like a little angel. I mean, he look so fresh. And his name, Elian Gonzalez, will make headlines everywhere. Elian Gonzalez. Elian Gonzalez.

Elian. Elian. Elian Gonzalez. At the heart of the story is a young boy and the question of who he belongs with. His father in Cuba. Mr. Gonzalez wanted to go home and he wanted to take his son with him.

Or his relatives in Miami. Imagine that your mother died trying to get you to freedom. At the heart of it all is still this painful family separation. Something that as a Cuban, I know all too well. Listen to Chess Piece, the Elian Gonzalez story as part of the My Cultura podcast network available on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Julian Edelman. I'm Rob

Gronkowski. Guess what, folks? We're teammates again, and we're going to welcome you guys all to Dudes on Dudes. I'm a dude, you're a dude, and Dudes on Dudes. I'm a dude. You're a dude. And Dudes on Dudes is our brand new show. We're going to highlight players, peers, guys that we played against, legends from the past.

And we're just going to sit here and talk about them. And we'll get into the types of dudes. What kind of types of dudes are there, Grunks? We got studs, wizards. We got freaks. Or dudes, dude. We got dogs. Dogs.

We'll break down their games. We'll share some insider stories and determine what kind of dude each of these dudes are. Is Randy Moss a stud or a freak? Is Tom Brady a dog or a dudes dude? We're going to find out, Jules. New episodes drop every Thursday during the NFL season. Listen to Dudes on Dudes on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, I'm Jay Shetty and I'm the host of On Purpose.

My latest episode is with Jelly Roll. This episode is one of the most honest and raw interviews I've ever had. We go deep into Jelly Roll's life story from being in and out of prison from the age of 13 to being one of today's biggest artists. We talk about guilt, shame, body image, and huge life transformations. I was a desperate delusional dreamer and the

desperate part got me in a lot of trouble. I encourage delusional dreamers. Be a delusional dreamer. Just don't be a desperate delusional dreamer. I just had such an anger. I was just so mad at life. Everything that wasn't right was everybody's fault but mine. I had such a victim mentality. I took zero accountability for anything in my life. I was the kid that if you asked what happened, I immediately started with everything but me. It took years for me to break that, like years of work. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Trust me, you won't want to miss this one. Hey there, my little creeps.

It's your favorite ghost host, Teresa. And guess what? Haunting is back, dropping October 22nd, just in time for spooky season. Now, I know you've probably been wandering the mortal plane, wondering when I'd be back to fill your ears with deliciously unsettling stories. Well, wonder no more, because we've got a ghoulishly good lineup ready for you. Let's just say things get a bit extra. We're talking spirits, demons, and the kind of supernatural chaos that'll make your Halloween season complete. You know how much I love this

time of year. It's the one time I'm actually on trend. So grab your pumpkin spice, dust off that Ouija board. Just don't call me unless it's urgent. And tune in for new episodes every week. Remember, October 22nd, the veils are thin, the stories are spooky, and your favorite ghost host is back and badder than ever. Listen to Haunting starting on October 22nd on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. There are some, like I hate, I hate it when there are some girls who are like, where are my gays at?

And it's like, they're not your gays. Yeah, not your gays. They're all individual people and there is a tokenism with the way people especially straight women act towards gay men that i'm very cognizant of because i used to do it because i and i don't know why i naturally really get along with gay men yeah yeah i don't know why but they're but like i could totally see a world i there's probably a world in which like in college I was like my games. And it's just like I'll never forget. I read Elliot Glazer wrote an amazing.

It was like an op ed. This is like six, seven, eight years ago about how like there was a woman who like wrote a humorous op ed that had been going around that was like, I need a gay best friend. Yeah. And he responded to that and was like, need a gay best friend yeah and he responded to that and was like we're not your accessories yeah we're not your purse yeah we're people yeah right i always had a sense and i don't know if you felt this way but like because i was on the team it was gay i was like well they're they won't add another one and maybe that was unfair of me to think and i always think you know like rupaul says how much of this is the

calls coming inside of the house um calls coming from inside the house but you know it makes you think a little bit like it was it it was much harder for women to become directors of that group uh and then when i think we had i mean fabulous david sidoroff was amazing yeah i mean he ran such an amazing group and the group really changed. And then I was director and then Sudi was director. Jenny Jaffe was director and it became, it felt, it felt like a different atmosphere,

like a much more accepting. It was not a great, when I was on there, it was not great. And I, yeah, I have many thoughts and regrets and it's partially what shapes my comedy now is my,

I dated my mentors. They completely turned on me uh and i was at a certain point trying to be like them and then i was like fuck these guys and i my comedy began to get more emotional feminine is the wrong word but more specific to things that affected me as a as a woman yeah and it shaped and then i started to write more musical comedy yeah and that's fabulous and there wasn't this but this kind of like masculine passing yeah is so real and it didn't really fully dawn on me until now that like you had to like feel like you had to grow up in order to like fit in or that you had to like wear a specific t-shirt that's really upsetting and fucked up that you felt like you had to just because you knew the comedy community was so like kind of like what you know macho is not the word it was half

that well it's a boys club and i knew that it was a boys club but like i had gone to ucb shows all year also all that summer i had taken a 101 at ucb and you know that's how i uh know that when you walk into those classes at ucb like you're all anxious because it's improv and am I going to be funny or whatever. But when you walk in and you're the only one, no matter what that means, if it means due to your race, due to your sexual orientation, maybe you're the only woman in a class, you take that class differently. Your experience is wildly different. But I think a lot of it also had to do with my

upbringing because i'm from long island and it's a very like toxic kind of masculine um culture there and you know they just don't even really know that it's happening they don't know that the minorities on long island feel the way they do i believe that if they did know and if they knew that people grew up this way and were so hurt this way like maybe they would change and also maybe i'm giving them too much credit um yeah i yeah did you ever feel like that um mine is more ethnicity based i think oh really like walking into the danger box audition i'm sure i pulled out like 10 Asian jokes and that is because what I was used to the modes I was used to were um uh it was it was just having to like make people feel comfortable and appease them by like playing this caricature of an Asian person so by like and so yeah and like yeah and I

even regret that like thinking back on that that's kind of really upsetting and makes me want to puke but like probably I don't know but that's the history of that's so that's in especially in america the history of how anyone who isn't a straight white male has been in in art and and culture and media is often playing a a straight white male gaze version of themselves yes or or playing a stereotype because that's only what you'd be cast as. And then, you know, and then Mickey Rooney takes your job.

And then Mickey Rooney books your book. I tried to watch, I had actually never seen Breakfast at Tiffany's and Gregor and I tried to watch it and we were like,

oh no. We couldn't watch it. No, it's awful. It's bad. Bad. I mean, yeah. It's good for the fashions. But you know what? Okay, I want to mention this. I want to mention this. I mean, yeah. It's good for the fashions. But you know what?

Okay, I want to mention this. I want to mention this. Are you talking about Mickey Rooney's adorable clothes in his bathroom? Absolutely. Nothing Audrey Hepburn wore. That was all fucking garbage. His, like, kimono. I want to mention this.

The Welcome Week show sophomore year, I, like, just laid those Asian jokes on thick. And then Andrew Farmer pulled me aside before the next show went up. And he was like, Hey, this year, and hopefully for the rest of time, I don't want you to make another Asian joke on stage. Oh,

God bless. And I was like, at first it really made me nervous. And then I was like, Oh, but he's so right. And then I like, that was a moment for me.

And like, I have Andrew to thank, but like, I'll still make an Asian joke. And like, I get to pull that card out whenever I want now. But like, that was like him telling me to lean off the crutch. Don't use it anymore.

And then it just took me to the next level. You're right. It becomes a defense. It's anything. And I say this as a Jewish person, which growing up in LA and living in New York is not really like a defense. But it's like you begin to, it's a defense mechanism. You turn what you're insecure about into your sword.

Right. But then that sword becomes a crutch. Ah. Yeah. Oh. What were the Asian jokes you made about yourself? Oh, God. It had to do with laundromats and Froyo places.

Froyo places? Oh, yeah. Pinkberry. And just every Froyo place is operated by Asians. It's cool. I've actually never noticed that. I never clocked that. I never clocked that.

You know what? See, I've pulled that out in my stand up a couple of times and it has like a 50% hit, right? Yeah. So maybe, yeah. You know what? Yeah. That's fair.

You know, it's so funny that you say that when you started to get angry, that's when you started to get musical because the same. Like when I graduated, we started to do pop roulette and that's when i really started to feel like oh wow i'm really writing what i want to write yeah well and maybe there's something to that thing where they say when you can no longer speak you sing but it felt like me too it felt like it felt like i remember one of the dudes in fact who i was in the triangle with was like, when are you going to stop the musical theater thing and just do comedy? And it's like,

so when I turned against these guys a little bit, I was like, I'm going to do what I want. And I fucking love musicals. And I went, I took a musical theater writing class at the Graduate Musical Theater Program over the summer. And I really started to like, not because the guys had ever discouraged me from writing musical sketches even.

It's just like, I had discouraged myself because I wanted to fit in I wanted to do the type of things I thought they thought were funny because it's a feminine slash gay impulse and that means it can't be mainstream or it can't be cool or it can't be whatever and it's

such bullshit because who the fuck said that I'm right but then it came full circle this is another full circle moment that I'm just like dragging out yeah with your golden globe speech it was like and now there is a musical like comedy on television on network and we i don't know if you saw the instagram we screamed oh my god oh my god you have to show it we were so proud of you we are so proud oh you have to i can't oh i want to see that honestly i knew you were gonna win yeah when when you got nominated i said to everyone i was like she is gonna win i was like absolutely because gina rodriguez had won the year before i and i felt like i was like they're gonna

want it and i knew i knew i was like you're so charming she's killing it with with everybody that that talks to her i was like let me tell you something there is absolutely no way that anyone watches this show or even meets her and checks off another box. Wow. I knew. For me, it was that first season.

For me, first season, after the Dr. Phil episode where you just like, where Rebecca starts to like fully unravel, I was like, she's gonna win.

She's gonna win some award this season. And it came true. It came true. And many awards. It came true. I can't wait to see that Instagram. Oh, we'll show you.

We were screaming. And actually, the Instagram was the second, we didn't like film it like the first time because we were watching with bated breath but we filmed we rewound it and like we watched it again we re-reacted but um okay so we should take a quick break i have i don't know if it's like a fart or something's happening. Whatever's in Rachel, we're going to get out of her. I need to bend over like a dog and just someone needs to give me

colonic farts. And we're going to be right back with Rachel Bloom. Thanks. Oh my god. Okay, bitch. All you out there listening to Las Culturistas, Casper is officially offering right now $50

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All right, that's enough. Let's get back to the show. Come on, let's go. And we're back with Rachel Bloom. You know why we're going to jump back in? Because I'm sticky. Sticky, girl. Okay, we talked about this in the break.

So Rachel Bloom came into town last year to be on Late Night with Seth Meyers. Heard of it? No. And afterwards, we were hanging out, and then Rachel was telling me about how Vinny Rodriguez was telling you all about Rice Queens. And then I informed you about the concept of okay so rice queens first of all are uh any gay man regardless of ethnicity who fetishizes asian men is almost exclusively into asian men so then i told a rice queen is a rice queen i told rachel about the

concept of sticky rice or being sticky which is asian on asian uh fetishism which and and so rachel i think you were very shocked at this new revelation. Well, because the idea that it's a common that there are Asian guys who don't want to date other Asian guys, so they'll be like, sorry, I'm not sticky.

Right. And we were just talking during the break about how that is also casually racist. But I mean, yeah, I mean, it's interesting. Like, at what point is your, you know, what your dick wants or what your vagina wants like is that discerning race racism or is that just what your dick wants and your what your vagina wants but it's like and i as a white person have no opinion on this there

you go and i should have no opinion there's also no such thing as preferring one i don't think so anyway because like you're attracted to like there's no limit on attraction like it's you not admitting to yourself that you're attracted to certain people or thinking you should be attracted to someone else like honestly like if I saw fucking Chris Evans walk in this goddamn room I cannot promise you that I'd be attracted to him because I haven't my body isn't in the same room as him yet wait I like there you go it's all fake it's all fucking fake but even then, it's like the gay men

who say they're not into Asians. If they saw Vinny, would they change their minds? It's that kind of thing where it's like... Yeah, it's like, are you saying you're not into Asian people

because that's what your idea of whatever you think, whatever you think you might be into that a person of Asian descent doesn't fit that? Yep, that's it. That's what it is. So anyway your eyes i mean people i would say like the big most comments we get on our show are like oh god no no no no no i was just like saying no now i'm just imagine no now i'm just talking about attractive asian attractive asian men but like

yeah i mean i feel like the people well no the person who's objectified most is David Hall's White Josh. White Josh, come on. But Vinny is objectified quite a bit. Honestly, hot. But also Vinny hot. Vinny's very hot. All the men on the show hot. And then Renee has been, there is quite, I mean, Father Bra is a fan favorite, but women are like, oh my God, Father Bra is so fucking sexy. I mean.

Partially because he's a priest too. Hot show. There you go, Father Bra. Also, did you know Vela for years? No, I never knew her. What? because he's a priest too hot show there you go also did you know vela for years no i never knew her vela's a star that is insane to me because you know how i know vela i don't know her personally but she's been facebook married to preston martin for a decade hilarious and i was like when i saw that she was on the show i was like oh i wonder if rachel's been friends with her for years it's, it's the weirdest thing. That's so weird. So Vela Lavelle,

who plays Heather and I, she was two years above me at the Experimental Theater Wing in NYU. We never met, never knew each other. Insane. We have all the same

mutual friends and when we cast her on the show, it was just from her audition. She's so good. I must have met her and then I was like, she came to a Hammercat show but I think just doesn't remember me,

which is fine. And I saw her in a show, The Dibbick, and I don't remember her either. So it's weird. That's fully insane. I'm kind of glad because Ike was a mess in college. I'm really glad she's getting me now. But here's the thing, Rachel. And this is a real thing.

Here we go. Bowen and I, our first time we ever met was our friend. Mong took us to a hammer cat show and we sat in silver and watched a hammer cat show. And there was like 13 people there. And you were the reason I wanted to audition for the group because you said you, you delivered a line so good.

So perfectly. It was a show where, um, it was speed dating, but all the dates were with voiceovers and you played the sex in the city voiceover and you turned out to the audience and said i had to wonder are we really speed dating or is the speed dating us and i was like that is so funny hold on a second this is a group at my school like i have to be in this and it was that moment that i

think i decided not only to like next year i was gonna come out next year i was gonna try to do comedy i was gonna admit to myself all my interests and it was like at that show that i was like i was gonna transfer to tish like i i i decided at that show i was like this is definitely what i have to do oh god matt i never knew that. That's amazing. Yeah, that was 100% it. And also the fact that that's the first time I met you. Wow. And here we are in this room.

Here we are. 10 years later? 10 years later. Rachel, you knew us when? You knew me when I was still in the closet. Yeah, well, I remember having a really in-depth... No, no, no, no. This is when you were out because we remember we went out for dinner at usc and you were on the fence about you were

gonna be a doctor yeah there was a time when he was gonna move back to denver and i was like whoa rachel took me out to dinner after the show at usc and it was i still remember to this day that was the nicest thing one of the nicest things anyone's ever done i mean but we had that long conversation where yeah i was you were like i don't you were like i love comedy but also i'm the nicest thing one of the nicest things anyone's ever done i mean but we had that long conversation where yeah i was you were like i don't you were like i love comedy but also i'm pre-med right and i was like i was like what did i say i was like don't help people i mean i'm trying to remember i think i was like she was smoking a huge cigar i was like help yourself don't help people kid you just sounded like medicine wasn't your passion at all and i was like why

would you be a doctor if you don't i was like being a doctor is really hard uh-huh you have to like you have to like it you know what that was the moment where i realized that being a doctor was going to be really hard and it was in that moment you're such a star you're such a star yeah i think that's also like you were just so distinct and your voice has always been so distinct. And I was like, oh, huh. Doctor doesn't really. No. I mean, you'd be the funniest doctor. Yeah, you'd be the best singer.

Oh, thank you, Matt. That's a doctor. No, for real though, real talk, that was actually probably one of the first moments where someone was saying to me, well, maybe that's not the right thing to pursue. Wow. Did you change majors? I didn't change majors. was saying to me like well maybe that's not the right thing to pursue and wow did you did you change majors i didn't change majors no rachel i had a full depression era personal depression i

shouldn't i shouldn't pair those words together depression era it was the 1940s yeah uh it was after college like i didn't realize like i remember being at graduation at yankee stadium and matt was fucking on the field singing with all his reality shows so i sang learn to love and live on the field uh and i just and i remember feeling sad in that moment i was like i don't want to do this thing where i'm gonna go to med school and so i like pulled out all my applications and then just like didn't follow through and then spent like the year after that the intervening year between college and doing pop roulette and like doing comedy shows like temping and trying to survive and like all of

that you really made the right decision i think so i took the bow into vapiano on university and i was like please be in pop Roulette I was like grace us with your because he I had heard through the grapevine that you were thinking about moving back home and I was like that's not acceptable and we had been talking in Pop Roulette about like because we how much we loved you and how much we wanted you to be on anyway

this is getting a little too inside baseball when did you when did you come out again it was middle of sophomore year was the weekend before the groups went to Skidmore, our sophomore year. I didn't go. I'm sorry. I'm tapping on the table. Wait, were you a year?

I was a freshman when you were a senior. 2012, I graduated. Oh, right. Okay. So anyway, and then I remember screaming to Neil Casey at the after party. Oh, this is the best story ever. I was fucking wasted. The after party of Skid the best story ever it was fucking the after party of

of skidmore uh-huh where bowen came out at skidmore screamed in neil casey's face i'm a big old fan oh my god and he's like that's great man that's fantastic and neil was like great cool like neil was so cool about it and i was fucking and I stormed over and I was like what that was yeah that was anyway great wait Rachel speaking of fun nights sure I secretly want okay but first Matt you go oh my gosh here's what

I think the Golden Globes is like okay oh right let's get into it well you wake up in the morning and your eyes open and you say this is the day. And someone hands you a mimosa. And so then they say, it's time. And you get in the chair and of course you get your glam squad.

Now, I would get beat to the gods. And I've already thought about if I ever go to the Golden Globes, what I would wear. Here we go. I would wear a canary yellow tuxedo top. Brings out the olive tones. And the black pants because I would be positive that I wouldn't win, right? Wink, wink. So then when the camera cuts to me for when I'm nominated, I would just do the kind of face of like...

You can't see, but it's like he's um come on a little it's like he's he's he's someone just uh he's in a business meeting and someone just like pitched that they all go home early yeah come on really but it's never gonna happen like that's that's his face there's no way by the way i should backtrack so i get all glammed up yeah i'm literally contoured like kim kardashian oh you you'd get like... I show up... Now, when you're saying you get done, are you going to get work like Botox before this? No, no, no.

Or are you just contoured? I would never. Just like a full face of makeup. I look like kimchi. Yeah. So I step out of the limousine and immediately Leonardo DiCaprio is hitting on me. It's just like, get out of here.

Leave me alone. I'm with my friends. I bring Bowen to the ceremony. Plus one. My plus one. He'll be nominated next year. Right. Same category.

I'm your Busy Phillips. You're my Busy Phillips. You're my Michelle Williams. No, actually, I'm Busy and you're Michelle. No, you're not. Did Michelle Williams take Busy Phillips? Every year. Every award show she goes to. Every award show, it michelle williams and busy is always right there and that's why

i keep seeing billy busy phillips places yes i didn't connect it to okay busy phillips is always where michelle williams is that's so funny at the award shows their dates always so anyway i i win and it's like this incredibly shocked moment and then the rest of the night is just a blur. Even in my retelling of it right now, what I think it is, it's a blur. So I do want to know, can you just walk us through what that is? What is it like to go to the Golden Globes? Here we go.

Well, I'll tell you what I did this year was, because I went to a, okay. So the first year I was nominated, we were invited to this fancy schmancy fashion party at the chateau marmont the night before and i'm like this is gonna be amazing i'm nominated yes and sure enough like i get out of the car someone immediately takes my picture i'm like this is great my husband and i go up no one gives a shit oh no one gives a fucking shit the chateau is crowded by the way i i have to say like these parties that are thrown at the chateau is crowded by the way I have to say like

these parties that are thrown at the Chateau Marmont which is like it's a tiny space there are a lot of bodies I moderated an event for like this non-profit at the chateau

and there was at one point a little girl was on stage playing guitar and I literally people were outside talking and I literally went hey

I went put down the cocaine and I literally went hey! I went put down the cocaine and shut the fuck up out there! A girl is playing guitar! And it was great. You goddess. Thank you. So we went to the chateau. We ended up just being the only people eating the food

which is great. When you're at like a party in LA there's no line for the food. It was great and so the night before we're like housing food so so then come this year i get invited to like a ton of events but the night before the golden globes and then i get an email from my friend saying and it's half a bit saying hey guys the pom the Pomona Reptile Show is in town. Do you want to go? And I was like, you know what?

Yeah. Oh my God. Because I was like, I'm nominated for a Golden Globe. I'm not going to get more nominated for a Golden Globe going to these events. I'm already going to be on TV. I'm going to the Reptile Show. Wow. And so by that point that day, I'd already had my nails done. Because this year to the Globes, I went with nail art of all of the cast members faces and so I'm at the reptile show and I'm

holding geckos with my fancy nails and just like falling in love with tortoises oh and and then after we went out for Chinese food because we went to Monterey Park for Chinese food because that's where all the good Chinese food is um and then so like I just because I just knew I was like I all these pre-events like I'm already nominated for the big thing which is the Golden Globe I'm gonna meet some lizards yeah so oh my god so the thing that I I want to say the last that two years ago I got like a facial but like honestly I don't have like I'm I go to the Globes in the middle of filming, or I had just come back from vacation this year.

So, all right, you wake up, your eyes fly open, and you're like, today's the day. No one hands you a mimosa. I guess you could hire someone to do that. You take a shower. You eat normally. I mean, to be honest, my days have been pretty normal. Like glam, they call it glam, which is hair and makeup. Glam squad.

Glam squad comes a couple hours before. And you sit in a chair. And they put the things on you. Here's the thing is I'm not one to like blast music while getting hair and makeup. I like taking the quiet time. So music while getting hair and makeup I like taking the quiet time so when I get hair and makeup on I meditate oh wow um but oh what we have to know is both years I got a dress custom made for me by Christian Siriano oh thank you Christian he's great so so I did fittings before that yeah which feels glamorous. Yes. But you're also like in a fittings

and there isn't like music playing. I mean, I could play music. I guess in all of these scenarios, I could be playing music and it would make it feel more like your fantasy. More like a pretty woman moment. Right, right. But the hair and makeup,

it's beautiful. And then you, here's the thing is like, you get to the Globes and it's just so unironically glamorous. It really is. And the red carpet shit is really, it's really crazy i mean yeah it's a it's a skill to learn how to be on it because there's people shouting your name and you actually have to turn around and kind of stretch

out your face because you're smiling so much you start to like twitch okay and oh my god you don't even think about this shit and well the first time i did it i was so confused yeah sure no one told me what to do and so i thought i literally everyone who shouted my name i thought i had to just look at them and so i spent all this time looking at each individual camera and then someone was like no you just look in the general direction and you do whatever the fuck you want yeah um. Wow. So that's like a chaotic moment. Yeah. And then it's really cool.

And then but then like you're waiting in line for the red carpet. Yeah. And there's like waiting in line and everyone just like waits in line. Oh, yeah. And so then you go in and you sit down and it does everyone actually get drunk. Um, I. You kept it together. Did this year. i got i got a little drunk this year the first year i didn't because i was so nervous you were nervous and then i won and i didn't have time to

drink but this year like i was pretty sure i wasn't gonna win and then when i didn't i was just like time to get plastered yeah so the first year when you're there. Like, did you think like, I think I might win? Two days before Rolling Stone came out with their predictions and they predicted me and that's when my writing partner, Aline, was like, babe, you might win.

Yeah. And so I wrote a speech. I was positive. I mean, getting to the Globes the first year was crazy because I step out. It's so glam. I'm overwhelmed

with how glamorous it is. You know, they hand you champagne. You're doing all this red carpet stuff you're doing e you're doing entertainment tonight and like you're next to all these celebrities who are like finishing up their interviews and I just remember them being like now you're this year's it girl or whatever and I was like yeah I guess I guess and then you know you win the globe and then immediately you're whisked off to press right and so there's a video online of my press conference but you have you've just won a golden globe and suddenly you're doing a press conference and luckily in my press conference i talked about diversity and then israel so so when call it they call your name and that's a ridiculous

experience it was overwhelming and I was like maybe expecting it and then when they said it I was like oh my god holy and I just my husband screamed like someone had died I I and then I had memorized my speech because like I wrote it I had written it up. And so that's why I think in the moment I spoke so fast, I wanted to make sure to get everyone's name in. But of course, I forgot to thank the Hollywood Foreign Press. HFPA. You did great. Thanks.

That speech was fucking great. It was crazy. And then the rest of the night, I just walked around holding a Golden Globe, which is heavy. Yeah. And I am not fit that speech was great when you're up there though do you clock

I guess was Meryl Streep there that year do you clock the celebs in front of you because you're looking at them no I was just kind of

looking out into the crowd general direction yeah you know what it was I went into stand up bit mode because I was in because the thing is when you're up there you want to do a bit because it's safe well you well it also just feels like you're doing a big show like a big stand-up show and so you kind of go into

that mode and you don't realize oh no i'm also on tv like the like watching myself on tv after the fact was so weird yeah because i remember it being like, you're in a not massive room with a group of people. Right. And you're like, okay, I got to play to the room. Yeah. A little bit.

Yeah. A little bit. Yes. Yes. And you have that high from performing. That's what it feels like. Yeah. I think what made that speech so great and so genuine and so earnest was you

just screaming, Oh my God. Like that. Yeah. Like sealed. what sealed the deal. I don't know. I don't know how anyone doesn't... How do you give a composed speech? Right. Maybe because you've done it a thousand times.

Yeah, I mean, look, Jennifer Lawrence has won an Oscar or whatever. Yeah. You know, when people ask me, people ask you... The morning you get nominated is really nerve-wracking because they announce it at 5 a.m the night before there's very few things in life where it's like you will know at this particular time when a massive thing is about to happen yeah there just aren't things

like that especially in actual show business you don't know when someone's gonna call if they're if you're gonna get a part if they'll ever call but But you're like, okay, at 5 a.m. tomorrow, I will know this. And the same thing with the Emmys, where it's like, at 7 a.m., I will know this. And it's fucking nerve-wracking. Your adrenaline's so high, I couldn't sleep. Yeah, the night before the Emmys this year was bad. I could not sleep. Oh, God.

It feels like the Emmys has, I guess, a little bit of a bias towards shows on maybe the CW. The Emmys is 18,000 people. So it's whatever the most kind of, I think. And not saying that stuff doesn't deserve it, but it is more known stuff. Yeah, of course. The Hollywood Foreign Press is 90 people. The Emmys are 18,000. Well, there you go.

What was I going to say? At that moment of knowing the the time it's sort of like sort of like theater camp or high school it's like when the cast list goes up that's exactly that's exactly what it feels like

it feels like the cast list is going up and so the morning I got nominated for the Globe felt like I won because that was just no one saw it coming and I kind of did

because I felt good about the press conference that I did but I didn't know and so when that happened I was I mean hearing it was uh it was Dennis Quaid our friend Jack's dad yeah yeah and like oh my god I was the first one because of my name alphabetically and then this year was Don Cheadle and that was that felt like I won

hearing my name I was like I'm From Don Cheadle. From Quaid. Because the amazing Don Cheadle, yeah. Because of the No, but that was huge. Yeah. I mean, that was and then, unlike this year, we were done filming, but the first year, I was in the middle of filming. Yeah. And so I

had to film later that day. Oh, wow. And everyone gets you drunk because they're handing you champagne. Right. I remember you posting about that or something. I remember, yeah. Yeah. You were still shooting. Oh man,

I really want to bring you to the Golden Globes now and you're canary soon. And I'm just going to like literally step out and Leo's going to be like, hey. Wait,

I just want to really quickly describe it. Because I do know someone that went to the Golden Globes and he hit on her. Oh, a girl. She was Miss Golden Globe a couple of years ago.

Oh. Quickly, I wanted to. Jamie Foxx's daughter? Close. I'm just going to say it. Sosie Bacon. Sosie Bacon. Kevin Baconvin bacon oh oh yeah it's always the child of a celebrity which i'm yeah apparently he told he's like that's trouble when she told him how old he was she was how old was she young but you know whatever he's he's leo dicaprio I just want to, can I quickly describe my Golden Globes day?

It's super short. Sorry, I feel like mine was anticlimactic. No, no. That was amazing. I can't believe it. That was a first-hand account. Primary source. I wake up. I put on a sheet mask.

I let it sit on my face. I'll put on my electric blue suit. I'll walk out. I'll forget my sheet mask is still on. I'll bring a huge vat of cuticle oil with me and just like dip my hands in it in the limo. And then I'll just pull it out. And then I want to do,

this is like a, this is like kind of an Amy Schumer crawling on the red carpet kind of moment, but I want to do a red carpet with a sheet mask on my fucking face. That's great. So I feel like my fear would be, cause that's the one where you can drink i would be i get hammered drunk yep yep yep because knowing my history it's like i was the one that was drunk at every sweet 16 like i like yeah it happened but it's okay if you get drunk here's the thing the idea the idea

you know there's so much composure like oh you know they ask you they asked me the first year I was nominated they were like so what were you

doing this morning and a lot of people are like oh my god I didn't even know I got a phone call from my agent or I was at the gym

and it's like fuck you no I was up watching the broadcast but like the idea oh I'm just gonna play it cool I do it for the art

guys this is a show where you're getting a hunk of metal for saying things. Like, it's entertainment. We actually ran into, Alina and I went to the Vanity Fair Oscar party, and we ran into one of the producers of the Oscars, and they felt bad about the whole La La Land Moonlight. And what I said was, and this is so like my dad, I became my dad, but I was like,

hey, this is a television show. Yeah, great TV. It's great TV. It's great entertainment. It sucks and it's weird, but at the end of the day, it's a show about entertainment. And so the idea that like, oh, I better not get too

drunk. It might not be civilized. It's like, let's look at the Oscars. You know where the Oscars even come from? I read about this. I'm going to butcher this, but basically Louis B. Mayer in the 20s, 30s wanted to hire people who worked construction on his movies to build his house.

And people refused because they were like, we're in the union. We're not just going to build you a house. And the union started to get stronger with the Teamsters. And they were afraid that the actors and directors were going to unionize. And they said, well, let's distract everyone. Let's have an award show. Oh, my God. We'll start a thing.

We'll call it, what's something fancy? The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. The Oscars were founded to distract people from unionizing. By Teamsters? No, no, no. Just like by the studio heads.

That's crazy. But like it's sparked by these Teamsters unionizing. But you know what? If you really think about it, of course it was there could like yeah it's an industry giving

here's the thing the critics giving awards is interesting because and maybe I'm biased because I've won a couple because you are critically acclaimed

well yes but also if there's anyone who and the Hollywood Foreign Press does watch a lot but if there are people who really watch everything

it's critics yep the idea of like because the television academy is just everyone who's in the industry yeah it's interesting it's fascinating this is why the tca is a gag come on because they give one person the award for drama and one person the award for comedy and they gave you yeah the award for comedy and And they gave you the award for comedy. And that is big. And they don't make mistakes. They always give it to someone who's super deserving. It was you and Sarah Paulson for People VOJ to give you a fucking idea.

It was really amazing. Yeah, that was really cool. That night was really cool. That's just, I always watch the Critics' Choice Awards, and I always clock when I see who they've given that award to, and I always make sure to seek that out. And of course,

I had already been watching Crazy Ex, but I was just like, it's just incredible. And I want to give a shout out to watch you on screen in a show that you created that's your brainchild, and also know that my pal,

Sonu Patel, writes for your show and I went to school to learn how to write with her. And she's amazing. She's fantastic. The second Aline read her script, she's like this,

I want this person. This person's brilliant. Wow. I'm so proud of her. Oh my God. And I don't, because I'm in New York still and she's in LA obviously

doing her thing. I don't see her enough, but it's crazy because Billy Domino and me and Sono and my friend Alice Roth, who's a writer producer in New York now.

We all went, we were in like every class together and then to see them go into this great success, it's just, it's so wild. It makes you think, I said to this when you started to really take off and when my friend sudi got hired by us and now i was like

you know i said to you yeah i was like you know this community that we had a feeling was special really was yeah and that was very emotional for me i was like yeah i just was it's just so great yeah yeah oh my god well rachel we love you surreal surreal so surreal should we move on to i don't think so i think it's time oh yeah and i i want you to give me something to rant about i think that's right i'll dig into the troll bowl for you then so guys um oh wait can i say one more thing yes please so i'm making my network television debut. What? What? Oh my God, Wayne, yes. On 4-20, April 20th,

I will be a contestant on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire. What? Chris Harrison. You're not going to fucking believe this, Rachel. Whoa. I shot this back in August. I went on a fucking whim. I went after work one day,

still, I'm waiting tables. I get an email from like ucb or the pit or whatever like hey they're casting for contestants for millionaire and i'm like you know what i i knew all these people kristen bartlett yeah um john bander duffy duffy kevin mclean all these people who had been on fucking millionaire and i'm like how are they getting this i guess they want like personalities right so of course they reach out to the comedy theaters i get this email that's like we're going to be auditioning for contestants for millionaire i'm like my one friend won 100k on it i was like i'm definitely going so i go down there i like pass the test

get interviewed by the producer i guess they like me enough pass me on do this like fake screen test pass me on finally i get an email you're going you're going to be a contest oh my god so i shot it in august i can't say anything about how it went but can we mention that i was going to be your your so you get a phone a friend uh but it now it's not phone a friend it's you can bring a friend in the audience. So I said to, because Bowen is very much the other half of my brain. I'm very like, you know, like, what is it, right brain?

No, you don't want to bring that. You don't want to bring someone who's the other half of your brain because it's going to tell you what you already know. The thing is, the reason I wanted Bowen. I just referred to you as it somehow. Thank you. It will tell you.

This thing here is very scientifically, mathematically minded. And also Bowen is genuinely the smartest person that I know. No, you really are. Anyway. And so anyway, he couldn't go. So I chose the second smartest person I know, Sudi Green. Oh. So she comes with me to Vegas.

We go. Oh my God. Let's just say you're going to want to tune in oh 420 days and it's gonna be a wild episode i wish you were in la because we would all have a little screening party i am gonna be let's have a screening party i'll be in town wait on 420 maybe we should do it we had plans to go to Disneyland that day. Um, but I feel like we got to have a screening. We got to have a screening. You know what?

I volunteer my house. Oh my God. I would love. We'll do it at my house. Okay. 420. 420. I'll double check my schedule.

I get back the 16th and I think that's going to work. Oh my God. But I wanted to say it now because this episode will come out, I think, then 12th. So you guys, and I'll say it again for the episode. We're going to have Miss Darcy Carden on the next episode of Culture Reasons. We're so excited.

And so, I'll say it again on that episode. But you guys, 420, Matt Rogers is on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? And you're going to want to tune in because there might be some good moments. You've kept things very close to the vest because not even I know what happens in this episode. And I'm very excited. Wait, I... Me and Sudi know. And Chris Harrison.

I gotta say, I'm pretty earnest about this. I will gladly... I'll host the viewing party. All right, all right. I have a really good... This will be good. Wait, is it noon? Whenever it airs now, it's daytime now.

It's on like ABC at like noon. Oh, maybe... Okay, man, I feel... I thought it was a nighttime thing. See, the thing is, yeah, you think it's still like a primetime show, but now it's like on every day at noon on ABC. I think it comes on after The View. There you go.

So all my fan base will be already watching ABC. Because of course, my demographic is women who watch The View. Like me. Remember when it was weekly and you had to like wait until the next week to find out It was a television event. Huge. I remember when, was weekly and you had to like wait until the next week to find out if someone it was a television event huge I remember when I fucking remember his name

I remember when John Carpenter won a million dollars he was the first one to win a million dollars and the question was how far away is the sun

is the sun from the earth and he called his dad no no no no no it was it was who was on who was the first president to be on network television

the answer was Nixon on laughing that was the one he won the million on well okay well then there was another episode which. The answer was Nixon on laughing. That was the one you won the million on. Well, okay. Well, then there was another episode which was the answer

was the sun is 93 million miles away from the earth. Oh, you remember that numeral. I remember it very clearly. So maybe we're,

maybe both of us are right. One of us is right. One of us is right. Okay, so guys, who's right? Me or Golden Globe winner Rachel Bloom? This is very meta.

Take your sides. Multiple choice question. Remember that I will go to the golden globes one day and i'll be wearing canary so um that's fantastic um you guys i cannot wait to watch i'm so excited i also think i'm possibly might look dumb now but um don't spoil but i'm just i'm not spoiling i'm just saying i'm definitely on and sudi green is my plus one and oh my god if you want a million dollars and you were keeping it like this close to the vest this whole time yeah i'm not a good secret keeper so it's been very hard for me to not tell especially because i shot it a long time ago and i didn't tell anyone. And I didn't tell, well, I did not tell anyone, right?

Yeah. You haven't told anyone anything. Okay, let's move on. And that was hard. Have you noticed him fanning himself with money? Yeah.

I have a case full of money behind me. Calling people in Switzerland, I don't know. Yeah, he's been like, he's changed a little bit. Been in touch with my account.

I cannot form sentences. But you guys, watch, 420 oh my god yeah so listen uh this next segment we have it's the one you've all been fucking waiting for um we had our live show lost culture racist i don't think so honey again i want to say thank you guys so much for making it such a success we're so excited about about it. And there's going to be, you should definitely stay tuned because I think we're going to be maybe doing another live show very soon.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Maybe even one in Los Angeles. Oh, my God. Maybe even one that features Rachel Bloom. We haven't talked to you about that yet, but we'll try to get you. You let me know when you're doing it. I heard you're doing the Story Pirates benefit.

I am. Oh, my God. I'm so excited. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, so fun. Are you a Story Pirate? No, but I'm friends my God. I'm so excited. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, so are you a story pirate? No, but I just,

I'm friends with a lot of story pirates. Yeah. So honestly, you got it. And you guys both story pirates. We're both story pirates. No, God, I have so many friends in story pirates.

It's the best. For those of you who don't know, story pirates, amazing, uh, collective of people. We take stories that kids write, make them into shows.

And there's going to be a benefit this year. One in LA, one in New York. They're in in may early to mid-may got to check it out i don't know these updates but look it up story parts and rachel's going to perform um but you guys i don't think so honey it's one minute to rail against culture something that's really been bugging us really been fucking us up and we get take 60 seconds to really go for it here we go so bowen yang um do you have something i do okay here we go are you ready you're keeping watch on time i think you're gonna go first and i got my eye on the time bowen yang starts now i don't think so honey people at soul cycle who steal your umbrellas when it's a rainy fucking day i went yesterday morning for a gaga versus

beyonce soul cycle themed ride i got my life My endorphins are coursing through my fucking body. And guess what? I walked to the front door, checked the bucket. What was not there? My $12 black umbrella from Muji that is durable and has lasted me months and months. I don't think so. Months and months. I don't think so, honey.

People at SoulCycle who think that it's appropriate. 30 seconds. That they're a rock star soul a rock star athlete warrior whatever the fucking things on the posters say that they uh they have that they have the right to steal people's umbrellas and people's protections from the elements i don't think so honey you cannot take my umbrella when i am trying to just live my life in the city and walk to work down spring street honey i don't think so honey i am just a soul warrior who needs his own umbrella and don't you dare fucking touch my my fucking power up louis there's some french for you i don't think so honey that's one minute

bowen and passions there you go that's you had the fire in your eyes great thank you i'm um you know what that that wasn't my strongest, but I really meant it. But you know what? I could tell, and I want to let everyone know listening at home that he meant it. Thank you. Thank you so much. So don't you dare. Just don't.

This happened to me at DCM last year. Someone stole my umbrella. Wow. Fuck you, DCM motherfuckers. The wokening, my ass. The wokening, my ass. The wokening, my ass. Oh, man. We talked about that with Monique. We talked about it last week. Oh, you did? I gotta listen to that

episode. It's fun. Okay, Matt Rogers, are you ready for I Don't Think So, Honey? I'm ready. This is Matt Rogers, I Don't Think So, Honey. Time starts now. I Don't Think So, Honey, Lake Michigan. I went with my boyfriend, Henry, to visit his parents, and bitch, I rolled up on Lake Michigan, and you look like an ocean.

Let me tell you something. If I'm seeing waves caress the sand, I better be looking at the Long Island Sound. You telling me you have fresh water and you still look like an ocean? Don't fuck with me. Also, you could never compete with an ocean because the ocean has much cooler marine life and they're much more dangerous what's gonna be in your lake some fucking fat ass fish guess what in the ocean we have octopus in the ocean we have seals in the ocean we have whales and what do you have not even sharks some of you have alligators and not you like michigan because guess what all you're too fucking cold

when i see a big ass body of water and i look out and i can't see the other side of the land i better smell salt and if i don't i'm not gagged five seconds let me tell you something like michigan fuck you i don't think so and that's a one minute wow this is historic never before has there been and i don't think so when he gets a body of water that's that was that was fantastic i was just with matt garing and he says hi by the way hi hi matt and i was telling he asked if i had ever been to michigan because i told him henry was from michigan and i was like yeah and i tell you i went to see lake michigan and i was shocked because it looked like an ocean it didn't look like a lake. And because the waves, like the way that they appear on the land,

I was just like very confused. And so he was like, wow, that sounds like you're upset. And I was like, yeah, that's my I don't think so. Wow. That's fantastic. And I was going to do my I don't think so, honey,

about straight men who come for big little lies. Oh, yes. Because I see you. I see you. Clocked with straight men. I see you saying you don't like Renata. I man. I see you saying you don't like Renata. I don't give a fuck if you don't like Renata. I don't like any character on Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

I put up with your shit. Anyway. Coming for all the institutions. I need to watch it. I'm horrible. I got to come for the straights. But wait, hold on. Before you do this, Big Little Lies finale has aired, you guys, and it was really amazing

and you got to watch Big Little Lies. And Rachel, when you have a minute, catch up. know i'm gonna do i mean you know what i'm gonna do it while i'm here you should great it's all on hbo all right so i'm not particularly angry at anything right now which is weird for me i'm just i think i'm too tired because i flew in today so i want you to give me a topic to rant about and i will instantly get angry at it for you so you guys i'm digging into the troll bowl which is a new introduction for rachel bloom and i have to give credit to anna dresden who came up with the idea for the troll bowl um yep but here we go i'm just digging through okay i got it all right i have a good one okay okay well i don't really know if i should do

this because she's another public figure so i don't know if i should do this i i was gonna say mariska hargitay but i don't want you to go come from mariska hargitay i don't know much about mariska okay so rachel rachel bloom you're i don't think so honey all right let me just get the timer set up this is gonna be good you're rachel rachel blues i don't think So Honey is kindergarten. Go! I don't think so, honey. Kindergarten? What are you? Are you a grade or are you preschool?

I thought I was done with this nebulous grading shit in preschool. I thought that's what I went to fucking Montessori for. When I go to an elementary school, I want to be given a grade. Kindergarten? Also, what's with the German name? I'm Jewish. What are we, a bunch of fucking Nazis? Kindergarten?

Why don't you just call it like child time? I would much rather go, I don't think so, honey. 30 seconds. I don't think so, honey. I don't go to an elementary school to be eating bratwurst and drinking a Rottler, which is what Germans do when they mix beer and sparkling lemonade. I want to eat American food at my child time.

And preferably call it grade zero if you're going to not number it. And also it's not a garden. Five seconds. Child garden? Child time? I don't think so, honey. Yes! That's one minute! honey also oh my god epic epic and i never realized kindergarten is a german word kinder kinder i

live in america yes i mean come on let's start my family's fled europe if I wanted kindergarten I would have stayed there you go honestly wait speaking of change dot org I started one as a joke and it became a thing change don't let the Donald Trump animatronic in Disney World speak at the Hall of Presidents did you did it

catch steam it has like 15,000 signatures which is like not nearly enough to change anything. And that animatronic will speak. But I felt good that enough people were like on my side about it. Of course. But can you fucking believe that that thing is going to talk? No, it's disgusting.

It's fully gross. Terrible. But let's start the Change.org petition now. Change kindergarten to child time. Child time. It's just straightforward. Kids can understand what it means. Child time.

Child time. Child time. And I think there should be more singing. I think it should be more melodic. Child time. It's just straightforward. Kids can understand what it means. Child time. Child time. Child time. And I think there should be more singing. I think it should be more melodic. Child time. It's child time. Yeah. It's child time.

Time to be a child today. It's to the tune of It's Quiet Uptown. It's Quiet Uptown. It's child time. There are moments that the toys don't reach. There's a nap time impossible to bear. You put your coat up on a hook listen guys barely ever read yes you can barely ever read you can barely ever read i'm so tired you guys i feel like i could talk to you forever i i honestly rachel is the fucking best and if

you're not watching crazy ex-girlfriend you guys i mean i gotta say what's the overlap of people listening to this podcast and not watching crazy ex-girlfriend and you know what i don't know that that that compliments my show too much i don't know who's i don't know what i don't know you know well okay so have you started season three? We've started working on it. Kind of. Alina and I have started writing it ourselves, like before the room.

You mentioned on your Facebook live a couple of days ago that you guys had written the first song of season three, which is very exciting. I can't wait to find out what it is. I can't wait to find out what the theme song is. Oh my God. Oh, is there going to be a whole new theme song?

Of course. Oh my God. Wow. I'm really excited. Balls to the wall bonkers with how Rebecca is now. Um, is there going to be a whole new theme song? Yes. Oh my God. Wow. I'm really excited. Balls to the wall bonkers with how Rebecca is now. That's so exciting. You don't know what your target demo is? No, I don't know what the target demo is.

I just don't know like overlapping people who listen to this podcast. I don't know like the random person on the street. You know what? If you listen to this podcast and you don't watch Crazy Ass Girlfriend, don't you dare fucking listen to another episode of this remove your review from itunes we don't want you we don't want you remove your review remove your review honey we are growing we're fucking moving on from you also i want to end this with one thought it's fascinating to watch big little lies and feud at the same time there you go i was going to mention something

about feud being a show about entertainment which is what we touched on you know what i that's what i want to watch both of them you should watch both of them because let me tell you actually is fascinating to watch them both because we have big little lies which is this like you know just like i think crowning achievement of television right now which is giving all these like incredible women these incredible parts and then to watch feud and a central topic of the show is like, there are no roles for us. We must make this work. And to watch them like companion pieces.

And so there are companion pieces in a way because, you know, few discusses that topic so much. And then there, so all the actresses are so amazing and they're all going to be competing at the same category at the Emmys. And you go online and it's like, no,

she's better. like no she's better no she's better thank god by the way this is redundant oh that's so interesting yeah it's like oh my god nicole and race are both so amazing i love bit of lies i big little lies i love female friendship now who should win the emmy oh yeah irony it's like It's like, It's so crazy. There's this movie with Kevin Kline called In and Out for many years ago. I haven't watched it in many years,

so I'm not sure if it's offensive. Here we go. I watched it about a year ago and it's not. Oh, okay, great. There's a line from it. It's what,

Christian, who plays Cameron Drake? Matt Dillon. Matt Dillon. Matt Dillon plays Cameron Drake. He's at the Oscars and they go, what do you think

of the Oscars? And he goes, I think it's wrong that actors be forced to compete against each other like dogs. And they go, so why are you here?

In case I win. Yes. It's so good. That movie's great. It's a great movie, right? You know what movie is homophobic looking back? Oh no.

Miss Congeniality. With Michael Caine's character. Michael Caine is like, his co-character is like I'm gay and Benjamin Bratz whole character is like dude I'm not gay

there you go it doesn't hold up but Sandra Bullock does hold up in it Sandra Bullock Queen Brat Balls that movie's great although they did steal

a line from A League of Their Own eyebrows there should be two Michael Caine goes eyebrows there should be two and that is a line from A League of Their Own in the finishing school scene. You know what?

If you listen to this podcast and you like Miss Congeniality, we don't want you. We don't want you. Take your overview off iTunes. But League of Their Own is the truth. There you go. My husband and I watched that movie a couple months ago and we, in the Marla scene, we both we both wept when and and i'm not i used

to be a crier when i was depressed and now i'm on prozac so i don't cry as much um and i wept honestly that movie makes me cry and this is a little known movie and we should wrap up but this we're gonna wrap up with this the three movies that make us cry. Oh, God. It's a film called Heart and Souls with Robert Downey Jr. and Keira Sedgwick and Alfre Woodard. Alfre. Queen. Queen Alfre. It's about

four people who die in a bus accident and become souls in the 50s and they get attached to robert downey jr when he's a baby and they become his guardian angels and they have to leave him when he's a child because they realize he's they're distracting him but then they they are involved when he gets he becomes like an obnoxious adult and they realize that they can only move on to their afterlife when he helps them fulfill their unfinished business. But he's also got a lot of problems.

It's a wonderful movie. It's really kind of cheesy and campy, but let me tell you, it will make you weep. Queen Alfre Woodard. Rule number 172 of culture. Queen Alfre Woodard. Amazing. Bowen.

Ooh, top of mind. And I've just been coming up with these basic answers on the last few episodes, like with these kinds of questions. Finding Nemo gets me every time. I'm sorry. It does. It really, truly does.

Especially when he leaves Dory. Again, basic, but I'm owning up to it. And thank you for that. Of course. You must. You simply must. Rachel? Movie that makes you cry. Again, basic, but I'm owning up to it and it gets me every time. And thank you for that. Of course. You must. You simply must. Rachel? Movie that makes you cry.

Oh, a movie. You know what I, well, I haven't seen it in years, but you know what movie made me bawl my eyes out? What? The Adam Sandler movie, Click. Oh, I've never seen it.

I heard about this being actually sad. It snuck up on me and I bawled my eyes out, but I want to add a secondary addendum which is a redundancy a thing that always makes me cry uh is um it's not a movie it's the episode of futurama about fry's dog yes people talk about that it's so good that dog looks like my dog and like literally just thinking about it like i get you truly just had a moment like the eye this dog oh my god this dog waited for him

and literally the spoiler alert the episode ends with fry's dog back in the year 2000 just like it turns out the dog waited for him every single day oh my god and then one day the dog just like lays down and closes his eyes and then the episode ends you don't expect that from futurama rachel's covering her her face oh my god i i'm not a crier but if you talk if you if you talk about dead dogs i know i can't handle dead dog shit don't see marley and me i actually never seen Marley in me. Avoid it. Yeah.

I have a dog and she's my first dog. Avoid it. Was this the one that you took in that one time? No. Because I remember one time you took in a dog and you wrote something on Facebook. You were like, hey guys. We found a dog. We found a dog.

And then we found the owners that night. Oh, good, good, good. No, but my dog is a rescue and she's like seven and a half now. And my writing partner very expressly grew up with dogs and was like, I don't have dogs of my own because I can't deal with when they get old and die. And I'm like, well, my dog will never die. Do you follow Old Friends Sanctuary on Facebook? No.

Fuck you. What is that? It's a senior dog. No, no. They're so happy and they're having a good time. It's going to make you cry. Oh, 100 percent. Old friends.

And they're also sweet. Guys, I want you all to shut your eyes. And I want to say thank you so much for listening to this episode of Las Colteritas. And I want to thank Rachel Bloom. Thank you, Rachel. For being on our show. She's a dog that's dying. Guys, my name is Matt Rogers. My name's Don Yang. Thank you, Rachel. For being on our show. She's a dog that's dying. Guys, my name is Matt Rogers.

My name's Don Yang. Thank you, Rachel. Thank you, Rachel. We love you. Bye. Forever. Dog. This has been a Forever Dog production. Executive produced by Joe Cilio, Alex Ramsey, and Brett Bohm.

For more podcasts, please visit foreverdogproductions.com. I'm Julian Edelman. I'm Rob Gronkowski. And we are super excited to tell you about our new show, Dudes on Dudes. We're spilling all the behind scenes stories crazy details and honestly just having a blast talking football every week we're discussing our favorite players of all times from legends to our buddies to current stars we're finally answering the age old question what kind of dudes are these dudes we're gonna going to find out, Jules. New episodes drop every Thursday during the NFL season.

Listen to Dudes on Dudes on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On Thanksgiving Day, 1999, five-year-old Cuban boy Elian Gonzalez was found off the coast of Florida. And the question was, should the boy go back to his father in Cuba? Mr. Gonzalez wanted to go home and he wanted to take his son with him. Or stay with his relatives in Miami? Imagine that your mother died trying to get you to freedom.

Listen to Chess Peace, the Elian Gonzalez story, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. No matter who you are, there are levels to what we experience as women. And T and I have no problem going there. Listen to Levels to This with Cheryl Swoops and Tarika Foster-Brasby, an iHeart Women's Sports production in partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment. You can find us on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Presented by Capital One, founding partner of iHeart Women's Sports. Hey, I'm Jay Shetty and I'm the host of On Purpose. My latest episode is with Jelly Roll. This episode is one of the most honest and raw interviews I've ever had. We go deep into Jelly Roll's life story from being in and out of prison from the age of 13 to being one of today's biggest artists. I was a desperate delusional dreamer. Be a delusional dreamer. Just don't be a desperate delusional dreamer. Be a delusional dreamer. Just don't be a desperate, delusional dreamer. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Trust me, you won't want to miss this one.