Last Podcast On The Left - Best Of: Hauntings
Episode Date: August 30, 2024This week the boys are getting some much-needed R&R so it's time for another compilation of some of our favorite spooky moments in this - Best Of: Hauntings (2023-2024) with a special introduction fro...m Ed Larson! Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ on Apple Podcasts to listen to ad-free new episodes and get exclusive access to bonus content.
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There's no place to escape to.
This is the last time.
On the left.
That's when the cannibalism started.
Hey everybody, how you doing?
It's your boy the Ham Daddy, Ed Larson here talking to you.
The boys are on vacation. Henry and Marcus are doing nice stuff with their families.
They love each other and they love their families and it's good and I'm happy for them. I stayed
home. Australia was enough for me, but I'm in the studio with Rob today and he cut together this really cool best of the hauntings episodes
since I've joined.
I got to tell you, I love all you people.
This has been amazing.
It has been overwhelming this past year.
It's almost a year I've been doing this show.
You believe that?
And the response has been overwhelmingly positive.
You know, I love you guys.
This has been a treat for me.
It's emotional, to be honest with you.
But you know, if you get your emotions too worked up, that's when the ghosts come in.
So today we're going to take a trip through our hauntings episodes this year.
And I hope you all enjoy it as much as I did. It's been a
real treat doing these shows and learning more about ghosts. And when I was a kid, you
know, I used to have a lot of weird ghost things happen in my, in my family and my life,
you know, and I've talked about them on the show before I did. I talked about them on
open lines and stuff, but, um, you know, this, you know, so the haunting stuff I was
really curious about, but nothing's happened to me really in a long time. And I think it's
because I smoke enough weed to keep the ghosts at bay, to keep them scared of coming around
big old Eddie Toons. Cause I'm going to get hungry and I'm going to eat you ghosts. Or
maybe there have been ghosts. And I just thought that it was the pot smoke that was the forming around me and it was the
shadowy figure was actually the weed smoke I was building and so maybe that's
what happens that's it the weed that I smoke the smoke comes out the ghosts is
there the weed smoke kicks the shit out the ghost and the ghost goes bye-bye
well
Here are some episodes
Where the ghost did not go bye-bye?
And I love you guys. This is last podcast on the left. We're on vacation
Thanks for listening to a best of episode. We love you, baby baby and we'll be back soon.
But perhaps it's said that the Madame returned to New Orleans because many believe that her spirit still haunts her former mansion.
See since the LaLaurie family sold the mansion in 1837, It's had countless tenants and has gone through
multiple incarnations. After it was sold to a man named Charles Caffin, he
renovated and expanded the mansion giving it a third story and the severe
fortress-like appearance it has today that honestly makes it look even scarier
than it did when Madame LaLaurie owned it. It's almost as if the house itself
grew into its reputation.
It's awesome.
Yeah.
Yeah, I mean, he did it right.
He really did.
No, he, I mean, it feels like he made it spooky on purpose.
Oh yeah, I did look at a diagram on the inside.
It's beautiful.
Yeah.
It would be so nice if it wasn't all full
of all that rage and death.
You know, you go through,
it's got the courtyard of the middle is nice.
It's got a little fountain in there.
I love when a house has a courtyard in the middle of it.
Me too.
It's really pretty.
Yeah, it is.
It's very European.
But it wasn't until 1889 with the publication of a book called The Haunted House in Royal
Street that the La La Rue Mansion began to build its current reputation.
That book included many of the stories we still hear today, like the ghost of the little
girl named Leah who jumped off the roof to escape Madame LaLaurie, who can sometimes be seen teetering
on the edge, deciding what to do next.
There were also reports of knocks, whispers, groans, the clanking of chains, and the shuffling
of feet.
But perhaps hoping to trade on this notoriety, the LaLaurie Mansion briefly became, of all
things, a furniture store in 1892.
Went retail.
Yeah.
You know, people need their furniture.
Now, they would see the ghost of the little girl up top of the house.
Yes.
That is still seen to this day.
So do you think that you could call that a gurgle?
Girl.
Girl.
Girl.
Girl.
Quite possibly.
Yes.
Thank you.
Someone just made a new burlesque troop.
Roller derby team. Yeah, roller derby team. The Gurgles.
Now we don't know if this is true because it's in the more sensational
lullery book, but it was said that the chairs and sofas in this furniture store would regularly be found torn up and splattered with filth.
I've heard this a couple times.
This is in other books.
They talk about this story.
This is one of the big L'Lori mansion hauntings.
Supposedly, each time a new piece of inventory entered the house, it would be covered with
urine, feces, and blood by the next morning.
And this continued even after they posted a guard with a shotgun.
Other sources, however, say that the splattering
of human waste only happened a couple times
and could very well have come from all two human sources.
I do wanna ask our listeners, sidestorieslpotl at gmail.com
that run retail on the first floor on Royal Street.
I've won, but they have great art galleries over there,
there's really cool spots over there.
How many times have you had to deal with?
rivers of shit
Slopping all over your stuff. It could just be people looking to get a deal
I'm not paying full price for this. You should have let me sit down.
That's on you.
Now over the years it's been said that whoever came into possession of the house was soon haunted not just by ghosts, but personal misfortune.
Oh yeah.
In 1893 the house was sold to an Italian immigrant named Fortunato Greco.
Should have named my man Unfortunato.
And this is my wife, Mr. Fortune. Oh wow, that's good.
That's two of those in one word.
Word jokes.
His nearby grocery store was never able to turn a profit.
They said that's the curse, the Lollaree Mansion.
But in a story that runs contrary to that curse, Greco flipped his luck when he noticed that the house was becoming a tourist attraction due to the
popularity of the book about the LaLaurie mansion so Greco started
charging people a dime so they could take their own personal ghost hunts oh
yeah and then he just opened it up to everybody yeah it was like a boarding
house and then it was like that was what they say is they the true
Misfortune here was the fact that they just came in and a bunch of us
shitheads Taurus arrived and destroyed the whole fucking house. Yeah ripped up the floors
It's just really destroyed and is like what the 1920s. No, this is a 1890s. Okay. Yeah, he set up concessions
He started selling merch, you know, like all the because back in the day
Like you could get really ghoulish
souvenirs from places like this like sometimes like if you if you like I remember when they dug up the
Belle Gunnis house like you could go and I think you could buy like pieces of bone from her victims
I just weird shit like a bit. There was also pictures of
Like just weird shit like there was also pictures of bodies was very common shit like this. Yeah, you could you would probably walk away with something really awful.
Alright, cool.
Yeah.
Man, stupid regulations.
Sounds like this guy was successful.
He was.
I mean, by 1895.
By leaning in.
Yeah, he leaned in.
He opened a saloon on the ground floor.
He called it the haunted exchange stayed open for a good 15 years, which I think in you know, New Orleans bar life
That's a good years is a good run
It was a good run, but I think it's because you leaned into the thing and you let the ghosts be employed
Mm-hmm. You know, I mean give them an opportunity now. They're a part of the industry
They're in what's it the buy-in employees things. What do you say with that idea where you have the employees shareholders? Yeah, they're shareholders
Mm-hmm, but once the neighborhood became home to more Italian and Sicilian immigrants
Many of the older buildings were turned into tenement housing and the Lolleri Mansion was no exception
It was during this period that a tenant in the Lolleri Mansion was reportedly murdered in his room in the most brutal fashion.
It was suspected to be a robbery gone bad because his room had been ransacked but nothing
of value was taken.
Very much like poltergeist activity.
Interestingly though, one of his friends claimed that the victim had complained of being bothered
by quote unquote sprites before straight up saying that there was a demon in the house
that would not rest until the victim met a bloody end and soon after
That's exactly what happened. It's apparently this is kind of where the a lot of the ghost stories got
Legitimized was during the tenement house days
Yeah of the little lorry mansion where a lot of people said they saw stuff that was you know, just straight up constant ghost activity
Yeah, you know, I imagine that's probably true, but it's still New Orleans.
People get murdered.
It's still also...
Yeah, yeah.
It's absolutely...
You need a ghost to kill people in New Orleans.
And, like, just the...
Being a tenement house in and of itself makes the house sort of kind of crazy.
The atmosphere is kind of crazy.
You never know what's going on in and out.
People bring chains from Italy.
Now, the Lollori Mansion remained an apartment building for most of the 20th century.
But in 1969, a doctor named Harry Russell Albright bought the building outright and lived there for 30 years.
Where he said he never saw or heard anything that could be considered paranormal.
I just feel like that's a guy in one of those latex bubble suits. He's like, shh, I don't see anything crazy in this house at all.
Meanwhile, he's got like a dozen roses jammed up his ass.
He's choking himself to sleep every night.
Nothing weird here, yeah, yeah.
I drink piss.
Normal house.
This buckle doesn't make me bleed as much as this buckle does.
Completely normal house.
But in 2006, the Lollaree Mansion was purchased by none other than one of our finest actors,
Sir Nicholas Cage.
Please, Mr. Cage, please say to anybody out there in Podcast Land, we've been trying to
reach you.
We know that you have a form that you have to fill out to reach you
What do we have to do to get that form on the top of the pile? I want to meet you
Yes, but I like that you called him sir. Nicholas Cage. I feel like he's an American Knight. Oh, yeah
I feel like he's American royalty. Oh, yeah, very much. So it's very important us. I was hoping you'd pick up on that
He is, very much so. He's very important to us.
I was hoping you'd pick up on that.
Yeah.
Reportedly, Cage wanted to use the Lawlery Mansion
to write, quote, the next great American horror novel,
although he admits he never got that far with the book.
Actors can't read.
But that's not their fault.
Their jobs are to emote.
They can read.
They just can't write.
They can't write.
Yeah.
Definitely can't write.
If they have to read the scripts.
There's not like some sort of script man who just tells lines to act.
No, that's what Ken does.
If Ken calls me, he goes over the lines, I have an earpiece.
Whenever I do it.
Recently I put an index card on the people on the other side.
Oh, that's great.
That's all acting is done.
Yeah, you just put the blinders on them like a bunch of horses.
Someone bring him a salad. Is this sweet greens here? put the blinders on them like a bunch of horses. And just. Yeah. Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh.
Someone bring him a salad.
Is this sweet greens here?
Uh, uh, uh, uh.
I can't go without 20 cc's of chia seeds.
Well, according to Nicolas Cage,
he didn't experience anything either,
but he also refused to sleep in the house.
He did, however, make a fun joke when he bought it.
He said, other celebrities celebrities they got beachfront property
I got ghost from property. That's me. It's I got I got ghost from property. Thank God this book was never
Some people You know, we don't try to figure out how to do it. Like, it's ghost front property. Woooooo!
Yes!
But in the end, Cage admitted that he bought the mansion pretty much because he'd been obsessed with the haunted mansion in Disneyland since he was a kid.
We know why you bought the mansion.
Where did he sleep?
Anywhere else. He had many homes.
He had many homes. In New Orleans?
Yeah. No, he owned... Heotharie Mansion in a haunted church.
Oh, okay. Smith slept in the haunted church.
He was covering his, he was covering all his angles.
I sleep next to the bells.
My problem is with this place, is it's too insular.
Now it's said that Nicolas Cage came to great misfortune during the three years he owned
this house, and that his career hit the skids for a bit.
But after checking out his IMDB page, the years 2006 to 2009 were pretty standard fare
for Nick Cage.
But it was the beginning of the dip of his box office numbers.
That's the key here, man.
Not quite.
I don't know.
Not quite.
There are some.
While 2006, admittedly, that was Wicker Man.
Not the bees.
Not the bees.
Not the bees.
Not the bees.
He did get to punch several women.
He did.
He did.
He punched what, six or seven women.
All of the cult members as he walked down the line, you know.
Yeah, he punched a lot of people.
Yeah, that was, and that was fun.
And it could be argued that Wicker Man over time
is a net positive for Nicolas Cage
Because we all talk about it all the time. It's not a great film. It's a horrible film
It's not even that fun to watch for kitschy purposes. No worse thing to happen to wicker since fat grandpa's
But he also had a massively successful
National treasure sequel in 2007 that's fine for the numbers and Ghost Rider though, which was a flop.
It was a flop, Ghost Rider was a flop, but in 2009 he got to work with Werner Herzog on Bad Lieutenant
Porticole New Orleans.
Fuckin' love this movie.
Top three Nick Cage movie, probably one of the lowest performing movies that he had ever done.
I read it did quite well. It did better than expected.
Did you ever use my lucky crap pipe?
My lucky crack pipe
What really wiped out Nicolas Cage during this time was that he had a crooked manager who stole all his money
Plus he got fucked pretty hard by the stock market crash in 2008.
Yeah, it can't be leveraged like that.
Neither of those things can be blamed on Madame Lallory.
You know, and he had to sell all his comic books.
Yeah.
Lisa Marie Breslin.
That was sad for him. That was sad. He had to sell, he got that illegal dinosaur skull and he had to
sell that back. Because it turned out it was illegal.
Man, how is a dinosaur skull illegal?
It's because it belongs in a museum.
Who gives a shit?
The museum.
Yeah, the museum cares.
I think it was stolen from a museum.
Oh, stolen from a museum.
Basically, there's a lot.
Hobby Lobby goes through this.
I wanted to do a whole episode about this.
Maybe we will, but it's a lot.
Talking about the illegal antiquities market is very interesting because there's a whole world on selling shit that is not supposed to be sold to anybody because
those are all supposed to go to scientific research for the most part
because that's who's paying to go dig it up so they're supposed to go in various
places but then these guys come in they basically steal it or they do their own
illegal archaeological digs which is fucking a great concept the idea of
being in one of those is really fucking how. How is it illegal, I guess,
if you're on like a national park or something
that's not your land?
Well, you have to sneak into a place
that's largely either government owned
or you have to, or it's kind of some kind of a national park,
like some kind of endowed place
that you're not supposed to be there for.
I don't know all the rules.
SideStore is LPOTL at gmail.com.
Please, if you are a student of archeology,
explain to me why it's bad to pirate bones. You can't download a skeleton. the rules, sidestories lpotl at gmail.com. Please, if you are a student of archaeology,
explain to me why it's bad to pirate bones. You can't download a skeleton.
Paleontology.
Yeah, well, I fucking mean it.
Please, any one of you nerds.
However, it is rumored that during the years that Cage owned the home, he was suffering from
terrible nightmares that he attributed to the curse of the La La Rie mansion.
He went to a medium who told him that the only way to break the curse and stop the nightmares
was to buy a grave as close to Marie Laveau's as possible.
Yes, it's true.
His grave is beautiful.
Now this is prime graveyard real estate in New Orleans.
This is St. Louis Cemetery number one.
This is arguably some of the most sought after graveyard real estate this side of Pearl Lachaise
in Paris. It's a nice
It is a nice you go down there. That's how you know, you are New Orleans
Celebrity status or at least would be a royalty, you know people wanted like that's just that's one of the places
If you're if you get st. Louis Cemetery number one, you're a place in New Orleans history is assured like Drew Brees is gonna be there
I don't know if he will I don't know if he will. I don't know if he wants to be there.
I don't know if he'll make it.
He brought a Super Bowl back.
Yeah, no, no, Drew Brees,
if Drew Brees wanted to be buried
in St. Louis Cemetery, number one,
I think they'd let him.
At least Kermit Ruffins.
Yeah.
Can I get buried?
I'm going to look this up.
Can I get buried in St. Louis Cemetery, number two on?
Oh, book. No, no, it's for tours.
OK, no, you can't just book it
Um, I don't think there's gonna be protocol on the internet for it. Like there's not gonna be a power me buried
How me buried st. Louis?
Semit it nothing. It'd be cool if there was like trombone shorty got one. It was just like half a trombone sticking out
Yeah, they'd be incredible. They're just outlining Imagineers.
But in the end, Cage was somehow able to convince the diocese in charge of St. Louis No. 1 to
make room for the nine-foot-tall pyramid memorial that will one day be Nicolas Cage's final
resting place.
Oh, yes.
They built it ahead of time.
It's sitting there, like this big ass...
It's huge.
There's a...
I think the Latin saying is like, of everything one or out of one,
everything. It is very, it is absolutely gorgeous. It's a giant pyramid.
Have you seen it? Yeah. It's awesome. It's cool. Eventually,
the bank foreclosed on Cage's house and the other haunted property owned in New
Orleans, the Our Lady of perpetual help chapel,
but he still held onto the pyramid only because the IRS can't legally take
Cemetery plot. Dude, and this is why we discovered this right before the show. We're gonna do our
2006 style movie
Living in a cemetery where if we all open up a morgue like the three of us we open a morgue and stuff
We ain't never got fuckin' pay nobody ever again.
We just live in a cemetery, dawg!
Just come over to your mausoleum drawer and knock on it, you roll out.
That's me, buddy! That's my house! I get a flat screen in there, we're running cable from across the street.
You got it made in the shade, brother! You know, we fuckin' put ice out.
It's nice and cool. Fucking pop a Seagrass song in the cemetery.
Every day, dude.
On the soundtrack.
No, if we're going straight 2006, we've got to pop a Shin song in there.
Oh, yeah.
Mr. Brightside.
Yeah.
Definitely.
To put it back there, we have to invite Zach Braff.
Yeah, we have to.
He has to come once a year.
This is going to be a vibe.
Think about Schmidt meets like Little Miss Sunshine
Oh, you get the vibe like put it together, you know sprinkle some Seth Rogen in there. Yeah, we got some inappropriate. We got a guy fart
Some gay jokes that don't age very well
This is our lives bro, This is past the pitch!
This is what we're gonna do!
No property taxes, fucker!
What are you gonna do? Govern me?
I'm so sick.
You know, so sick.
Now after the bank foreclosed on the
Lallaree mansion, it was bought by a
Texas businessman named Michael Wayland
who still apparently owns the house to this day,
but has a very small footprint on the internet. Couldn't find out much about him.
Yes, and this is also the story I love. We got one of the listener emails that was talking about a lady
was on the French Quarter Phantom tour and she was walking on the, you know, you go through the, you get to the end,
and all of a sudden you're hearing all the story about the Lori mansion and it's when freaks the fuck out.
She starts calling.
Well, she says like, did you pay them?
Have you been paid to say this?
Have you been paid to say this about this house?
And they're like, I don't know what you're talking about.
And they see, watch her walk away, make a call.
And basically you find out that she is personal friends with Michael Whalen and they and her
family were told to stay at the Lori mansion for the weekends and had never heard the
Story about what fucking happened in there. And so she's like we are getting a fucking hotel
It's haunted
Haunting stories are haunting stories sure, but then this is the fucking worst level
Haunting story. It's like you show up, and I'm like oh yeah, you're staying at John Wayne Gacy's house tonight
You know I have fun welcome to Des Plains
I know you I know you would do it, but if you're just a regular fucking person now would you stay in the floorboards?
regular fucking person. Now would you stay in the floorboards?
Uh oh, too big.
Yeah, one listener actually attended a party at the Lallory Mansion.
They said that the current decor was quote, sentient cocaine.
That's awesome.
Yeah, it's just very tacky, extraordinarily tacky.
On the same block, I was looking it up.
There's a place called the Haunted Hotel where you can go and people say that they've been
seeing ghosts there.
I don't know if I believe
them these are Google reviews. It's probably the guy in a sheet. Yeah this one lady said she went with
her mom and she didn't tell her mom was haunted and she was mad and they she
said they wouldn't call it haunted because the ghost was very nice. Oh that's very cute.
It's shared. Yeah. Pre-lived. Yeah it's like when you do an Airbnb and there's like a
guy living in the back house
and you just gotta live with him for a while. Yeah.
He's just always out there hosing things down.
He's like, why are you out there? I'm trying to sleep.
You come out here, I'll hose you down too.
I know you will. I know you will.
But as the years have gone by, so too have the stories of Madame LaLaurie's cruelty
grown beyond the realm of the grotesque, and now they sometimes include her husband as
a sort of Dr. Mengele type accomplice.
I am innocent!
I am innocent!
I'm not going to break into bank!
Yeah, what did you call him, Henry?
Mississippi Mengele?
Yeah, Mississippi Mengele.
Yeah, I mean, and the stories are outlandish.
I mean, they claim that, you know, Dr. Lallory broke a woman's bones and refashioned her
into a crab woman. Cool. Another says as a claim to like turned a woman into an armless
legless worm. Like, have you ever seen Todd Browning's Freaks? No, but I have seen Freaked
and I really like that movie. Freaked is a great movie. Yeah, Freak is awesome. Freak is awesome. And up top Browning's Freaks, there's a guy in the movie that's just a torso
and he can like, you know, roll his own cigarettes
with his, you know, with his own lips.
That's pretty cool.
Yeah.
I mean, it's upsetting for him,
but it's very cool that we can do it.
I mean, he flipped it and reversed it.
He, you know, he was living a pretty good life.
Yeah, he figured it out for himself.
That's what you gotta do.
That's what you gotta do.
Yeah, he's in that fucking final awesome scene
where they're all like,
they're all about to fucking take down the acrobat
and they're all like crawling through the mud
and the rain and like he's got a,
he's got a fucking dagger in his teeth.
Yeah, it's such a great fucking movie.
Yeah, I'll watch that shit.
Remember the worm guy from Freaked?
Oh yeah, sorry about that.
He's like, would you wipe my ass please?
Would you wipe the ass please?
Oh my other favorite line is from Randy Quaid,
the fiddle fat.
Love that fucking movie.
The floor of the chamber in this story was permanently slick from puddles of fresh gore,
buckets of body parts are strewn about the room, helter skelter.
They make it sound-
And that's the worst part, it's not organized.
Like, you get a fucking, get a container store employee in it.
Is that what helter skelkelter means all over the place?
Yeah, okay. Willy nilly. It's a scarier version of Willy nilly. Oh my god. Imagine if they wrote Willy nilly
So long to figure out like I I wanna see like the detective,
it's like willy nilly, what's another name for-
Did Caesar do this?
Yeah.
Sorry to cut you off.
I don't know, I'll always concede the Florida
has said Caesar joke.
The willy nilly goo goo gaga baby pants murders.
I don't know if that works.
But really, there's no need to make Madame Lallory worse than she already was.
Even without the more extreme claims, Madame Lallory is still one of the great villains of American history.
The star of a particularly evil chapter in a book that is itself already evil enough. Well thank you for that!
Spoogey! It's Spoogey!
Sorry that's my very rare occurrence of my Madame Lola Reevois.
I will take a bow!
She was a very bad man. She was a bad bitch.
She was awful.
I'm glad she's fucking dead.
We're all happy she's dead and not an immortal being.
No, I mean God knows she could still be there
Do you think so?
We don't think that happened. It is good that she's a ghost if she is a ghost, you know tortured
Yeah, she'll be she'll be stuck there. Yeah, it'd be good. It's a beautiful piece of property though. Yes
It's a shame. It's worth like three point. I think a Nicolas Cage bought it for three point seven million. Damn
Yeah, it's hard at the fucking...
Royal Street's probably one of my favorite streets in that area.
There's a good African restaurant next door. I was looking for food.
And yeah, I'm gonna go. I gotta go now.
We are!
We're gonna go. We can't wait. We're doing it up.
Yeah, we're gonna be... I'm very excited about our return to New Orleans.
...fly from your grave.
Every brothel in New Orleans has got a different flavor.
They got a bunch of different things.
They got a bunch of different styles.
You know, like one, which he said, I want you to guess, he said, he would say every
other form of sexuality possible.
But then the one thing that he would never name that was always forbidden was sex in
the French fashion.
And so he's like, let me guess, can I ask any of you guess what the French fashion is and we're all like, oh
pissing in a dead woman suck it out the piss
Carving the eyes out of it if it shit
You take shit out of a dead man's ass and you and you stuff it inside a lady
We eat the shit out of the ass and he's just like no no no no it's um, it was oral sex
We're like oh
Okay, you asked us
You asked me so that's French style. Oh, yeah. Oh oral sex
I thought is when you shove a wedge of brie inside of a dead girl
And then you you took to see if you could see it in her mouth like no no people were on hygienic
So it was blow jobs, And I was like, oh, interesting.
And so he tells us this story, and he's like, so this room has gotten some activity, and I have various tools, and he put out a ghost box, which we always kind of feel like, I was just looking to have fun.
I was expecting nothing.
He's bringing out toys and letting us play with them. That's it.
That's what it was. He was like, we'll walk around.
Not guiding us, not really just giving us toys.
We had a couple of EMF readers.
We had a couple of little things that were like, they would light up for various temperature
changes and EMF changes.
And there was a ball, like he put a ping pong ball out and he was like, but one of the things
that he used, which I'd never seen before, which is two sets of sets of dowel rods and so what they were were two metal like kind
of like sleeves. I'm calling them diviner tools.
But they weren't traditional diviner tools which are done in sort of like a stick.
They're not dowsing rods. Yeah it's not a dowsing rod but it's these two things
these two sort of things so they were metal rods in an L shape that would go
into little tubes that you would hold in your hand. They're kind of loose the two little L shape things are like kind of loose
They're able to swing back and forth
And so basically he said we like to set up a series of parameters what goes on in this room
So we set up our like okay
Stuff for you know, like we'll turn on the ghost box and we'll let that roll one
What we'll do is we'll kind of generally talk and introduce ourselves and hang out in this room and see what happens. And these doweling rods, we'll set up this idea
that we'll ask questions and the doweling rods, if they swing wide, opposite wise, it means yes.
But if they cross over each other, it means no. I'm like, all right, so we kind of like
futz around for a while and do very shit and then Jared one of the members of murder fist
He picks up the doweling rods and he's fucking with it and he notices that they stand straight
So it's like you kind of balance them so they stand straight
But the one thing is is that they didn't stay straight for everyone. No, it was like I couldn't use them
I had them and they were flopping all that
There were a few people who grabbed them and like they're flopping all over the place
But you know some people you grab them and they just go straight forward pin straight
And so he started asking questions and the things started working
So we asked several questions defining what they were talking to you know
We said or is this a an entity that's attached to this property in some way. I mean it. They just
entity that's attached to this property in some way.
I mean it. They just open to yes.
Started asking like, are you the person that's the subject of the story?
Close to X to no. And he said that not only were they, and I watched it, I have pictures of it. I'm standing in front of him reacting to it.
There are white as a sheet. There are 15 people watching him. Yes.
Not only what, why does the sheep had started sweating? him. Yes. Not only went white as a sheep, it started sweating.
Yeah, yes.
And so he said when they crossed,
he said that he couldn't pull them apart
whether he wanted to or not.
They sort of linked like they were fucking magnets.
And then he linked across.
And we all sat there.
I mean it.
It was wild.
Other things started going off.
Natalie was holding an EMF reader on her lap.
And it bounced off.
And Jared then said, did you just try to
Speak to Natalie and it went swung open. Yes, we all fucking freaked out
Everyone's is like, holy fucking shit then he's like there's weird kind of garbled stuff coming through the ghost
Good the the the radio box box is running this entire time
Mumblings coming out and our leader was like see the thing here is like, so it's, it's, it wouldn't
just say random things.
If it says stuff like there's something trying, struggling, either coming through
or something's pinging this machine and it's doing something.
Jared then asked the question, are you having problems using some of the high
tech toys that we're using right now to communicate with us?
And I swear to fucking the devil himself.
And I will attest to this as well, as well everybody else in the room.
I'd scare on the back of my neck standing up.
The ghost box said kind of.
Like it came out clear as a fucking die.
It just came out.
And up until that point it had been all garbled.
Because that was one of the things that I sort of misunderstood about
Spirit boxes is that I didn't realize how fast yeah, you see it's running through that the channels
Yeah, extremely high rate. Yeah, I didn't realize how fat like I thought it ran through a little bit slower
So every once in a while like so you're just getting you know, everyone's like yes. Oh, hi
No, it is just it's bringing like just these garbled messages
They're running through so fast, and it really was clear as day
Kinda and then we sat there were like okay, and then we asked another question
He's like what's your favorite drink and then when it said vodka?
I mean it it said vodka the ghost thing said vodka we went downstairs. We got a shot of vodka
We put it back on the table
We put the emf meter next to the vodka shot the VOT the things started shooting off. It was
Truly wild. I finally saw something the way that new Kirk's described it
Whatever was in that room was trained like a fucking dog. It was like that was wild
He said that he had not experienced anything like that in the last couple of trips because of her while there was a little bit
Because once I started watching everybody get into it,
I will allow myself to step back from the skeptics
to the skeptic side, right?
Because now I'm like, okay, good.
I got all these people that are really believing it.
But now there's a part, I'm starting to ask the questions.
Can he fake this?
What are the parlor tricks in which
that he could possibly fake this?
I watch him do, like like you can't control the
Ghost box because I've used one of those before and do that specific is fucking wild
And I don't know how he does that the stuff with the the only way you could fuck with those bars is with a magnet
Mm-hmm, which I mean, I don't again. I don't know if he is David cop a feel or not
You know because there's only one of those
But they're they're everywhere. They're possibly secret magicians. They always kind of lie about what they do in their private homes, but then
After Jared was done. See this is why Marcus is on the show
So of course, right all of my years talking about this fucking horse shit
All of the years I spent all the reading,
all the things I've shown Marcus. Marcus is always just like, yeah, well, it's certainly
not the Stooges or like he's got somebody he's just like thinking about music and something
else. But it touched you.
After Jared was done. So he puts down the rods. And we've got we had like 45 minutes
in this room. And everyone's like at this point everyone's very satisfied like
We've come to New Orleans. We we shared a paranormal experience with a bunch of people
And so everyone at this point like we're just we've got ten more minutes in that room
And everyone's got their EMF meters and everyone's just kind of talking about how crazy that was and I figured
Fuck it. Yeah, Let's pick up the rods.
Yeah, yeah, you never do that kind of stuff anyway.
I mean, I went to Crescent City Conjuring,
which was another great store.
I had a fucking psychic moment.
This whole trip was wild.
Yeah, and so I went and I picked up the rods
and I took them in a really nice, steady position.
And I had watched other people flipping around, but with me, I picked them up.
And again, straight forward.
It's like, oh, okay, cool.
I was like, well, and I asked,
am I communicating with anyone right now?
And they just went.
Yep, to yes.
And they went to yes.
Yeah.
And that's the thing is that I was off in the corner
with, it was just me and was off in the corner with,
it was just me and Carolina off in the corner by ourselves,
tour guides talking to somebody else.
Everybody else is like doing their own thing.
And then I'm just like, and I just looked,
did you see that?
She's like, yeah, I saw that.
And so I started asking it more questions.
Like I asked it like, are you from New Orleans?
And it's like, yes. And I asked it like, are you from New Orleans? And it's like,
yes. And I asked it like, do you like having us around? Yes.
Yeah. It was like getting excited. It was weird. It was doing stuff where it was like, do you like hanging out with people?
Jared asked that and it went to yes. And we're like,
it started really the energy kicked up in a way that I did not expect.
Yeah.
And every time that it answered a question of fucking chill
went up through my entire body and I started feeling,
like I started feeling what I was talking to.
Like I felt like I was speaking with someone very friendly.
You got hard?
Yeah.
You were hard.
Somebody who could make me hard.
But then it's nice that Carolyn is there
so she could finish the ghost job
So I felt that it was a very warm
Friendly presence and I felt that it was a woman. I felt like a female presence nice
And I felt like like she was somewhat bawdy, like kind of friendly.
Big tits?
A sex worker. Someone who's fun. Somebody like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,, that sent a chill up my fucking spine,
was I asked, are you ready to move on?
And it swung out to yes.
And then I asked, is there anything we can do to help?
And it went, no.
Oh yeah dude.
There was one, oh man.
And it just, and it was like, oh fuck.
Oh yeah it was crazy dude. There was one oh man But and I was like oh
And that's and that's when like Jackie saw me she's like are you talking to a fucking ghost? I'm like I'm talking to a ghost right now
And that's like everybody else in the room kind of started paying attention is like guys
I've been talking to a ghost for like five minutes now. This is wild credible
And if I that's a man that in the picture you can actually go to my Instagram at my hair
You can see the moment and you can see the you can see the
The rods in the yes, but like going into the yes position, and I honestly you know
Y'all know me y'all know me y'all know what I stand for all right, and yeah, I can be considered gullible
I consider me an experimental person of thought
Dives in and I don't know. I don't really even care
I don't care what's real or what's not real because all I fucking know is dog is fucking
I think I might have died that fucking correct center almost got into in the way the Disneyland the other week nice
So but that's that's just me. That's my own fucking problem. This is a mental problem. I have I think it's called Cotard syndrome
But the yeah, I saw something happen
That was extremely physical in a room and happened right in front of me and I had several other ghost tour guys that were like
Yeah, it's fucked up. It's happened. They're all like seen about
Probably between like 10 to 20 of these and I was just like it's interesting because now I kind of know where you're if you're
If you're walking
Through that type of scenario it may sound
Credulous to you that we're outside of that room. I totally understand
We sound like crazy people, but I saw something man, and I was fucking sober
Yeah, I was as sober as I could have been yeah, because I got I had gotten drunk earlier
Then I went to sleep and a nap and then I got I woke back up and I sorted myself out
Yeah, I was sober as well. Yeah
like I had like that's the thing is I can say that that night I both saw and
Experienced something truly paranormal for the first time. I like I
Experienced the paranormal whatever the
fuck it is I don't know if it's an actual person an actual spirit I felt an
actual presence speaking through me. Yes I and I want to thank French Quarter
Phantoms. Thank you Jesus. For popping my hymen. Thank you for making my butt hole big for those.
So you know I didn't experience it myself I just saw from the side
I don't know what you'll experience if you take a ghost tour, but
Especially that kind of environment I expected nothing happen. I expected absolutely not
I expected us to fucking wander around a room with a bunch of toys for 30 minutes
And then make a bunch of jokes get a drink and have a good night
That's that's all just have fun doing that and scaring people each other
But no it was like genuine contact genuine contact so go check out French Quarter Phantoms also Crescent City Conjures
I went there and I had a very magical experience in absolutely mesmerizing woman by the name Tom Janee
grabbed me and she's like the color green is
Something that you need and I's like, the color green is something that you need.
And I was like, okay, you know, whatever.
And then I go out to see Tank and the Bangas last night,
the night, that night, and I didn't know
that the theme of it was their album,
the green album, and there was green everywhere.
And then I went back there to go get,
to go talk to the lady again, and she wasn't in.
But then I talked to the guy who owned the store,
was this big, crazy-looking dude with a head wrap
and two huge dogs and like several chickens. And then I had to the guy who owned the store was this big crazy looking dude with a head wrap and two huge
Dogs and like several chickens and then I had to go back behind the store with him while he drank wine and we talked
About magic for an hour honestly was great wow it was cool
He's very frightening, but man New Orleans whoo the city's so good
They only made it once yep, and I can also say Euclid records also a fucking fantastic incredible record store
I wish I could have spent two days in that place.
Dude, can't wait and, you know, we will be back New Orleans.
That is false or don't, and there's a lot of bulletin!
I get it now.
I finally get New Orleans.
Live from your grave.
But because we didn't give haunted dolls their full due, we're going to cover a slew of haunted
dolls today.
Starting with what inspired today's episode. My boy, Robert, the haunted doll.
Bobby, you guys are fucking up right at the beginning.
You're fucking up immediately.
What? You can't call him Bobby.
You call him Robert or you call him nothing.
Robert, I'm sorry. Yes.
Good. Ed, sorry, Robert.
There are a lot of rules.
Robert the haunted doll is the soup Nazi of haunted objects.
He's very popular.
Yeah, he's very popular. There's a lot of work in there, but if you want to get that musketani,
you're gonna have to play by the rules.
You guys ever seen Robert?
Not in person.
No. I've had friends see Robert before, because it's a Florida doll.
He's from Key West.
Yeah, Key West, yeah.
And they all say he's fucking terrifying.
Oh, it's very scary. Yeah.
Well, Robert the doll was the subject of an entire book by an author of the paranormal
named David Sloan, who first met Robert the doll in 1996.
Sloan, by the way, makes it a point to say in his book that he was investigating the
paranormal before it got popular.
Yeah, it was like a total scene back then, but you know, yeah, it's totally different
now because back in the day, like Bigfoot would like hang out
You know, like you could fucking talk a like and Loch Ness would like he just like be there fucking whatever, you know
You don't have to pay for me
Pre ghostbusters. Oh, yeah pre well more like pre paranormal except like paranormal like ghost pre ghost bro
Like pre ghost bro, because also remember Dan Aykroyd started Ghostbusters because he was one of us
Yeah, he was a total obsessive with this content, but it was not it was not popular
Yeah, have you ever read the original like screenplay to Ghostbusters or heard about like the original ideas?
I just know it was supposed to be Belushi. No, it's well
Yeah, it was supposed to be Belushi, but the original concept like the original script of Ghostbusters is insane. It's awesome
Yeah, it's awesome, but it make it's fucking crazy. I'm gonna make that movie
at once
Which is honestly that was probably a good creative choice the proton pack is honestly more fun. It's more iconic futuristic
Yeah
Well author David Sloan became obsessed with Robert the doll after visiting a man named Darrell Meyer
Who owned the house where Robert the doll had lived for a
Number of years mostly in the attic and Meyer was skeptical that a doll could cause any sort of paranormal activity
But when David Sloan asked to see the attic where Robert had spent so many decades a nearby rotary phone
Blew off the receiver and that was one of those things that happened regularly around Robert the haunted doll. Yeah
Well rotary fold they shook, you know, it could have the phone could have fell off. That's bad. That's bad wiring the receiver. And that was one of those things that happened regularly around Robert the haunted doll. Yeah.
Well, word of refold, they shook, you know, it could have, the phone could have fell off.
That's bad.
That's bad wiring.
Yeah, it flew though.
It shouldn't just be shaken.
But the homeowner shrugged it off as if this was something that just happened all the time.
But even though he didn't believe in the paranormal, the homeowner still let David Sloan, a total
stranger rummage around in his attic. Sloan found that the room still held
several pieces of child-sized furniture, all built for Robert the Doll. And that was real.
That was before Robert the Haunted Doll became publicized or whatever. They did create a whole
area where this doll could just live. Yeah. Now, admittedly, Robert the Doll very much looks like
a cursed object. Its face is pockmarked and nearly featureless,
and it somewhat resembles the prosthetic faces that were given to disfigured soldiers during World War I.
It also has the definition of a doll's eyes, lifeless eyes, black eyes......doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle-doodle- So much fun to do. And I also noticed that... I got your email, I got your head!
I got your head!
I got your whole head!
Show me your head!
Eddie, you actually did some good Google searching right before here.
But it is important to remember, we did learn this,
when you type in Robert the Sailor doll, you need to include Haunted.
Because if not, it brings up a whole twink universe
that I didn't know was there. There was a lot of happy trails in that search.
Yeah. Yeah. Robert, the sailor doll out of Key West. I've met that guy. All right. Roommates.
Never a girlfriend. His belt buckle touched my belt buckle when he hugged me.
Robert is also surprisingly large. It's child-sized. It's three feet tall but
only weighs about six pounds. It's a unit. Covering his felt and wire body is a
yellowed four-piece sailor suit that replaced his original costume of a pink
and green harlequin outfit that was replete with pom-poms. So he was a cheerleader
No
Actually find the sailor costume to be creepier than a harlequin costume. Oh easily yes Harlequins. I'm not
By well, that's it's hack. Yeah at point. But yeah, a tiny haunted sailor is terrifying.
Yeah, cause I know a lot of big adult haunted sailors.
We lived through Fleet Week many a time in New York City.
Oh yeah, they got a story to tell and they got a boat that doesn't go anywhere.
Hahahaha.
As far as where Robert came from, we know he was crafted in Germany near the turn of the century by the Stief company.
And it's believed that Robert was an expensive window display piece that was sent to Key West by family that was still living in Germany.
When did it get to Key West?
Uh, 1900.
So it could have known Ernest Hemingway.
It was in the same neighborhood. He probably spilled a couple of beers on it.
But soon after
Robert arrived dressed in his original clown outfit what if Robert the sailor
doll was his inspiration for the guy with no penis in that fucking book
Robert the doll has no penis have we checked Robert's penis no it's got no penis they said none
yeah no they would have said there was a whole chapter in it on the book. Yes, there is. And it describes every inch of Robert the Haunted Doll.
None of it.
There's none.
There ain't no penis.
Quit checking.
Quit asking.
No spaghetti.
No weenie.
We are going to call the Haunted Doll SVUE unit, sir, if you ask one more question about
Robert Cianattelli.
But soon after Robert arrived dressed in his original clown outfit, those clothes were
replaced with its current sailor suit.
That suit had once belonged to Robert the Doll's first owner, the long-suffering Gene
Otto.
No, I'm just blown away.
I gasped.
Now, at the turn of the century, it was quite normal for boys to play with dolls, so Gene
and Robert soon became inseparable But the nature of Gene's obsession is speculated to have less to do with the child's normal attachment to a beloved toy and
More to do with good old-fashioned voodoo
You know even just the obsession because that's what they said is that in this obsession continued throughout
Gene Otto's life. Yeah, which we'll get into this is a
There's something attached to this. He saw something in this doll and his out Gene Otto's life. Yeah, which we'll get into. Wait, this is a, the, there's
something attached to this. He saw something in this doll and his, that's
kind of what they talk about. It's because it's about our relationship with
the object. Yeah. It's the, what does it mean to us? You know, there are certain
objects that, you know, when I was talking to the new Kirks, they talk about
trauma, like I brought it up before, but the idea that like you're in a room
where something traumatic has happened to you your focus was an object while you're in
that room while something traumatic is happening to you and it's like you shoot
juju at it right you make it filled with this kind of energy where something like
this it's like you're really lonely because that's another one of those like
deep dark well especially when you're a little boy and you don't know what to do
like you kind of cuz your emotions are stronger when you're a little boy and you don't know what to do. Like you, because your emotions are stronger when you're a little kid.
Like you're like, you're a little bit more, maybe, you know, you're not more in
tune, but you're definitely more vulnerable and sensitive.
And the idea of like, you becoming obsessed with this other thing and it's sort of
like implanting your personality on it.
Oh, I was extraordinarily attached to my, uh, my little monster, uh, doll.
Yeah.
Yeah.
My little monster. Yeah. the big yeah my little monster
yeah the big fat one with the long nose and all that no I was attached at the
hip to that thing I loved it I love my baby tugs care bear nice oh he's a good
guy now do you think Key West throwing out some theories here lots of Haitians
in Key West this is back in the day. Straw Market, mom could have yelled at someone at the Straw Market.
Curse you.
Curse the dog.
Here's the thing.
Concerning that, G. Notto's grandfather was a doctor named Joseph who had a servant from
the Bahamas named William.
So it's still West Endies.
And William was married to a fellow Bahamanian named Emeline.
Dr. Joseph Otto went blind in his later years and William cared for him until Joseph died from internal injuries after suffering a fall.
It was really nice, honestly, their relationship.
Yeah, but once Dr. Otto was dead, Thomas Otto, Gene Otto's father, hired William to work
as a clerk at his drug store. Soon after, Thomas Otto began an affair with William's
wife Emeline, as is evidenced by journal entries
written by Gene Otto's mother, Minnie,
and also further proven by the fact
that Minnie Otto specifically requested
not to be buried in the Otto family plot after her death.
She actually had her name to be changed to the Minnie Cooper.
Here, of course, is where the curse comes into play. See, Emeline gave birth to a child during
her affair with Thomas. It was Thomas' child, and this is evidenced by a lawsuit that she
filed against the Otto family. Tragically, the child died, and it's said that Emeline
used Voodoo to trap her dead child's soul inside Robert the doll.
Wow.
Yeah, dude.
Okay, so yeah.
That's probably what happened.
It's a lot of, but there's going to be a lot of spite talked about today.
Okay, cool.
That makes a lot of sense.
Spite is one of the really powerful emotions that we have.
I mean, that's why we're here.
It's why we're sitting here today.
No, this whole network has been fueled by spite from the beginning.
It's nice, because like it, but you know, it does create problems.
You have to be careful, because if you're seeking revenge, it ends up coming back on you.
And also, if you put that in someone's head, they're going to, like you said earlier, help
it manifest.
Yes.
Well, this, author David Sloan speculates, is why Gene developed a lifelong attachment
to the doll, because Gene intuitively sensed that the soul of his dead half-brother was
encased within.
I mean, it's a big jump, but it is interesting.
It's a very large jump.
The idea that you maybe even as a kid have heard these things.
Like, I like to kind of... something along these lines...
And I'm going to continue on even though my mic just cut out one news...
Definitely not because that I'm a lion robber, the haunted just cut out one new it's definitely not because
that I'm a lion Robert the haunted doll
No, right. No, no, I didn't and I want to say I'm sorry again
Robert the haunted doll because that genuinely creeped me the fuck out
Yeah, it generally I mean it's not due to the fact that this scarlet already has one input to chat out
We just went through a studio move and these things just don't really last for a long time. And you spit constantly into the microphone.
It better not be.
I just want to say again, I'm sorry Robert, and I love you.
Fly from your grave.
Well them remodeling Herb's entire house from the ground up, that might be why the house
itself and the surrounding property is the scene of a well-documented and honestly quite
compelling haunting. This haunting was extensively chronicled in the book,
Horror at Fox Hollow Farm by Richard Estep and Robert Graves,
which is our main source for today's episode.
If I was you too, I would go look up.
Obviously the Ghost Adventures episode with Zach Baggins is,
it is entertaining.
It is very, very entertaining.
My God, that show should be fucking 16 minutes
Now I farted yeah, not farted at all what I thought I could understand there was kind of a celestial sort of structure
I'll know they got night vision here and the temperature gauges. It was just my fart
You're gonna have to go Bonzo.
It's just, I have never watched that many episodes of ghost adventures and the way they
cut back to foot to statement said before to repeat the exact thing that they just said,
like sex for example, the man in the red shirt was right here. And they go, man in the red shirt was right here.
Right here.
Now we may be talking about the most prolific American serial killer of all time.
I think he may have been the most prolific American serial killer of all time.
That's because unfortunately sometimes the audience doesn't pay attention.
Yeah, you ever watch Shark Week?
They do the same shit all the time, you know, it's all Discovery Channel crap. Yeah, but then I get to see sharks again, and that's fine
Yeah, sharks are cool, but I like ghosts. I like smudges. I like his glasses. I like Zach Bagans
Look now who's having the adventures him or the ghosts to him?
Absolutely, and the ghosts do not like him there, but the documentary I would recommend is the haunting of Fox Hollow Farm
It is legitimately scary. This is this entire haunting story is legitimately
very creepy to me. Now in 2008 a normal albeit wealthy man named Robert Graves
purchased Fox Hollow Farm with his wife Vicki and their two young sons. The
mansion had been sitting empty for five years and it was in even worse shape
than it was when Her herb died and when I say
Mansion, I mean
Mansion. Oh, yeah, this place is massive. It's beautiful
It actually reminds me a little bit of what Neverland looked like same Tudor because it was a Tudor house
Yeah, like I say thing neverland was a Tudor mansion same style. Yeah, but it didn't have the grandma wallpaper that
Neverland had
Doesn't have the grandma wallpaper that neverland had yeah Doesn't have the style of never or bubbles. Yeah
I don't know if you teach bubbles how great it is to come while getting choked. He does like to eat lips
He said it's a beautiful house, but this guy is very funny. Did you read the actual the I was reading through the book and Robert
Graves, he's like now I have people know about me
I'm a horseman
My wife's a horsewomen
Most people call us horse people
And what people don't know about horse people is that it's every horseman's dream
And what people don't know about horse people is that it's every horse man's dream
That he would look out what drinking a cup of coffee in his kitchen and look out the window and see his beloved horses
He saw when he went to Fox Hollow Farms. He was just like our horses live everywhere Yeah, there's a horse living room right here. Here's a horse dining room. Here's a horse bathroom
swimming pool.
When you see their house, it is full of like horse memorabilia. The horse paintings, horse statues, or not statues, horse sculptures.
And they do have a beautiful little, you know, horse stable. They realize their dream.
It's beautiful.
And they held on to this fucking place. I think they still live there.
Yes, it's the same family.
Yeah, they've been living there for God. I mean almost 20 years now
Imagine if you loved horses so much that you lived in a place which just haunts you
terrified out in the fields seeing phantom men blow each other? Fly from your grave.
Well since the previous owners accepted an offer well under the asking price of $2.8 million,
the Graves family spent the extra money on remodeling the mansion completely to restore it to its former glory.
That's before Herb ruined it with his hoarding and murder most foul.
Yeah, he did ruin the house in that way. And the raccoon piss.
The raccoon piss. The raccoons technically ruined the house.
Yeah. He more ruined the vibe.
Well, the raccoons made it better for raccoons. Yeah, of course. They made the vibe better for
raccoons. Yeah, it's all about perspective. Now, Robert and his wife were informed of the
full history of the house the first time they toured the home, but they weren't told of any paranormal activity. In fact, it was probably not known that there
was paranormal activity because the previous owner had never actually lived there and had
only ended up owning the property in what he said was a real estate deal gone wrong.
I just think he meant that he had to buy that house at an extreme loss and then lost money
again when they negotiated for three years, which is what the graves did very very importantly
Because they were like no one's buying this house. Yeah, and they were like they knew no one's buying this house
No one's coming for this house. So they paid basically just market value for the land. We have to live here
Our last name is graves
They are the most normal fucking people you can imagine.
Yeah, just like our horses and honestly, I like the skeletons.
Sometimes the bread goes missing, who cares?
Who cares? No breakfast.
No, Robert wasn't really a believer in the paranormal,
and his wife was in fact a full skeptic,
because she came from a scientific background.
She was a pathologist.
Neither one of them were squeamish either.
So they decided that Fox Hollow Farm
was just the fixer-upper they wanted
and the perfect home for their beloved horses.
I just want to make sure that the horses are okay.
The horses have got a place to be.
There's the glue that holds the place together.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
AnyTunes.com. I saw. He's the glue that holds the place together. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha The first odd occurrence came when Vicky was vacuuming and the cord was suddenly pulled out of the socket
She plugged it back in but actually watched as it flew out again on its own as if it was tugged
By someone or something you stay dirty bitch
Now even though Vicky was as I said a skeptic this too weird to ignore. And she said that she suddenly got the strong sense that she wasn't alone in the house.
And whenever it was, it was there with her.
Didn't want her to stay.
And all she heard was the sounds of.
Would that be her?
Yes.
I was her palatingfileting a horse.
He's saying no, it's rape.
Now, a few months after the renovations were finished, Robert and Vicki invited a friend, Joe LeBlanc, to rent the apartment above the garage like so much
Fonzie.
But he wasn't, he was more a Ron Howard than a Fonzie.
That is true. I would say he was a bit more of a Potsie.
Yes. Oh yes.
Well like Robert and Vicky, the history of the home didn't bother Joe at all.
Oh wow! The first thing he heard, as soon as he heard about it he was like,
Oh no shit, huh? Great! Oh wow, fun!
You're telling me I get to live above a whole garage? That's incredible!
I get to share a bathroom with a horse? Unbelievable! This is incredible! I got a chair, a bathroom with a horse!
Unbelievable!
This is incredible!
I was just living in a trash can.
Yeah, I'm from Sesame Street.
It was a massive, it was a 4,000 square foot garage.
That's beautiful.
It was huge!
That's great.
But, in Joe's first night in the apartment, he had a horribly vivid nightmare.
In the dream, Joe said that he was running through the woods behind the house, convinced
that something terrible and extremely dangerous was chasing him.
When he woke up, he was in...
Damn it.
I can't fucking get my rhythm going when you're fucking doing that.
Stop it!
Are you good? Yes.
When Joe woke up, he was still in flight mode, so his body involuntarily leapt out of bed, and he slammed into a door frame.
That's his fault.
Yeah, that's it. And after that, residents of the house claimed to have started seeing literal full torso
vapors like the librarian in Ghostbusters.
Your whole plan was get her?
One afternoon, Vicki saw a young man that she thought was a trespasser walking through
the trees, wearing a bright red t-shirt and jeans.
Don't you take up any room for our horses! You can't come in here! That's a horse's lawn!
She couldn't make out the face, but she kept watching as this apparition walked through the woods.
Soon she realized that there was nothing but empty air from the thighs down. The man in the red shirt had no legs but before Vicky
could say anything he disappeared
That's what my dad's ghost looks like
Yeah, no legs
Cause he lost his leg
But also it's funny is that his legs are their own ghost
Yeah, yeah, yeah, they're in a whole nother town
That's cute
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's fun for them
Still in Reno?
Oh yeah, oh yeah, yeah He can't leave Reno No, no, no, that's fun for them. Still in Reno? Oh yeah, oh yeah, yeah. He can't leave Reno.
No, no one can leave Reno, unfortunately.
That's a big gate on the town.
Well, about a month later, Joe, the guy who rented
the apartment above the garage, saw the same apparition,
except he saw him at night.
See, Joe had a dog named Fred, and they'd go on nightly walks
together in the woods behind the house the same woods where her
Baumeister had burned dozens of corpses and spread their bones
I know I would but like can you just imagine a regular person just doing this like this is not cute
I mean most of stories not cute. It was like
Literal boneyard. I mean I know from our live shows most of our listeners are just regular people. I know I love cemeteries
I love boneyards dogs of bones to
But it's bad for their teeth if they break they snap into a human bone to be bad and the fragments will go down their
Throat it's actually bad for well unless they were cooked they would be yeah
We're burnt that's interesting. Yeah, that's actually very true. Yeah, they were cooked. Yeah, they were cooked they would be. Yeah, if they were cooked. A lot of them were burnt.
That's actually very true. Yeah, they were cooked.
Yeah. They were cooked. They were roasted.
Oh, doggy, he's got some butt juice in his belly.
Don't let Rambo go out there.
Oh, he'll eat the fuck out of those bones.
He's got a thick throat.
If we want to find more victims of her bow-meister,
we should take Rambo out there.
I mean, he can't walk too good, so we gotta use the wagon.
Yeah, we use the wagon. You know what I
caught Frankie eating the other day? What? A rock. Yeah buddy. Dogs love rocks.
Dogs love rocks. Anything to make you question your whole life. Here's a little
tip for you dog owners if you're walking your dog and it really wants something
that means it's gonna kill it. Yeah yeah yeah. You know what's nice about having dogs and cats and not kids is that I'm not worried about going in and seeing Wendy like with a big like
Blueprints of her school and a bunch of scopes. Yeah, you know what I mean? Yeah, that's nice
Yeah, the other thing is if like the dog dies, I don't go to prison
Well that night the night that Joe saw the apparition, he heard something moving around
in the trees, and Fred took off in a sprint towards the sound.
That's when Joe saw the man with the transparent legs moving through the woods.
Joe, who was now highly creeped out, mustered up the courage to walk into the woods to look
for his dog, but when he swung his flashlight behind him towards the noise,
he found himself no more than 20 paces from the man in red. That's when Joe ran, and luckily,
Fred was right behind him. That experience, however, didn't stop Joe from running the deer trails at night, because
as time went on, Joe seemed to have become strangely comfortable or at least familiar
with the spirit world.
Yeah, these guys don't say anything about my personal hygiene, they don't say anything
about my attitude, or my aggressive style of playing risk.
Or the fact that I live above a haunted garage.
There's a lot of people that seem to be deterred by the many birds underneath my rented apartment.
But to them I say, Fie, I am a lover of men and women.
Bang.
To the point of Joe being comfortable with the darkness he didn't stop running at night
you could just see him being like yeah me and the ghosts my only friends hanging out
here amongst the bushes just like the slippery slingsnakes of the night oh i gotta go get the milk, the grapes.
Joe didn't stop running at night even after he saw a tall, thin, dark figure, blacker
than black, moving in an inhuman way from tree to tree.
Meanwhile, Joe's apartment was showing classic signs of a poltergeist infestation.
During his first week, he was at the kitchen sink when he heard a knock at the door thinking it was Robert or Vicky Joe called
Could you stop fucking doing the?
Tell a story you're sitting there slurping on a goddamn half empty ice
Now, anyone who's seen a Conjuring film knows about the infamous Paranormal Museum that is in the Warrens' home.
For the uninitiated, the basement of Ed and Lorraine Warren's house is filled with artifacts
from their many paranormal investigations.
Hundreds of objects that were, in some way or another, cursed, touched, or inhabited by demon kind.
Over here we got the lamp that Aladdin rubbed or something, I don't fucking know.
Over here we got this parking meter where I got a ticket.
Two fucking weeks ago I got my jackhammer and I pulled it out of the goddamn ground.
Is the museum open? Can you go to it? Two fucking weeks ago I got my jackhammer and I pulled that out of the goddamn ground.
Is the museum open?
Can you go to it?
From what I've read, you can, but it costs a lot of money.
I think to be honest, it was just closed.
I believe it was closed in 2019 when Lorraine Warren died, but I'm not quite certain.
I think we'll talk about this more in the future, but I'm pretty sure that the son-in-law of
Ed and Lorraine Warren keeps the torch going with his own brand of Annabelle vodka.
Yeah.
Wow.
Wow.
Merchandising.
Nothing I like more than a doll that drinks liquor.
Annabelle vodka.
Even a haunted doll could get divorced.
Well, when the two men from Ness went down into the basement, they were warned not to touch anything inside. Anyone who went down into the basement said, don't touch anything.
Because if they did, Ed said that he would have to purify their auras so they wouldn't be left
vulnerable to demonic possessions or interference.
For proof of this claim, Ed told the men that on one visit, a man started banging on the
case holding the infamous haunted doll known as Annabelle, demanding her to do something
to prove her existence.
For those who don't know, Annabelle is a haunted raggedy Ann doll that's locked in a glass
case in the Warrens basement guarded by a sign that says positively do not open.
And it's crushing in the box office.
Yes.
Annabelle has it does it has no idea.
No has no idea that all of this money is being made on her fucking back.
She has no idea.
She's what they it's what they did to Tupac.
It's what they're doing to Annabelle.
Annabelle needs a nice Jewish lawyer. Yeah.
Here's the case where I keep Annabelle's Jewish lawyer.
I knock on that.
Unfortunately, every time I knock on that, it's $150 an hour.
Let's go.
All right, next thing.
Well, according to Ed, the young man and his girlfriend left on their motorcycle and were
soon mocking the doll and the Warrens like they were characters in a fucking ChickTrack.
Do you know Chick tracks? No idea
They're these horrible little Christian comic books like they're driving like ha ha ha
Can you believe how stupid that doll and those people are ha ha ha? Oh, no, I am losing control of my motorcycle
Oh, no, I am not in this motorcycle accident and I am now dead and I am now in hell
Well, have you ever seen Tijuana Bibles?
No.
It's stuff like that.
It's you know.
I got a book of Tijuana Bibles I need to show you.
Man, you have a library you need to show me.
Yeah, you should go to his home.
Well suddenly as I said the young man lost control of his vehicle and drove directly
into a tree.
The man Ed said was killed instantly while the girl was hospitalized for a year all
Because they mocked Annabelle and you know what in the end I laughed
I'd love to see that. It's just a thing. That's just thing. What's nice Annabelle. You still got it
Yeah, I gave him a $10 tip. This is thank you Annabelle. Good work Annabelle
As Ed put it you do not challenge evil the way that this unfortunate young man challenged it because no man is more powerful than the fallen angel that is Satan.
Of course, except for Dio.
Yeah, Dio could challenge Satan all day long. Didn't matter how tall he was. Five foot two of just pure power.
Focal range.
Talent.
Now the veracity of this story of the man in the motorcycle and Annabelle is impossible
to check out because I don't think Ed ever gave the name of the couple in order to give
the date of the accident.
But every time a visitor entered his basement, Ed did treat each object as if it could potentially
curse or kill anyone who touched it.
That's just good showmanship.
It is. You're selling tickets to a haunted museum.
You want it to be creepy in there.
Yeah, put gloves on, you know, be scared.
Oh yeah, Zach Baggins is doing it like fully to the hilt in Vegas right now.
It's like a three hour tour.
You can give it, say what you want about it.
It's scary in there.
Now, the way the basement is portrayed in the Conjuring movies is a masterclass
in spooky set design.
Each object perfectly dusty, mysterious and impressive.
Yeah, you have the incredible face of Patrick Wilson next to it.
He's extremely handsome.
He's so charming.
He's extre- wuh-uh.
Talk about the puddles.
I get- my dick gets wet looking at Patrick Wilson.
I don't like that.
I don't want him to have that effect on me. You're really attracted to him. I've seen you mention this. He's got a big head.
He's extremely talented. Also, he's from my part of Florida. My drama teacher used to
talk about how wonderful Patrick Wilson was in States and he did Broadway and if you could
see if you saw him on Broadway, you, my friend, would also be trying to fuck him against his will
Because he is a singular talent. Yeah
Well back to the objects in the museum
Yeah, yeah And according but according to writer Stefan Beck who toured the actual real museum in 2005
The Warren's occult museum is a little chintzier than how it's portrayed in the movies
the Warren's Occult Museum is a little chintzier than how it's portrayed in the movies. Reportedly, amongst other items, one can find an air horn, an LP of Black Sabbath's album Paranoid,
I don't know what pressing, but it's one of them. It's there.
They got a rubber frog. Very frightening.
A haunted organ? No, is it the liver or the kidney?
Various Halloween decorations decorations a lot of Halloween
decorations a gray Poupon jar labeled black magic witchcraft items
The president won't be here any longer! We gotta get him his hot dogs!
Excuse me, do you have any Grey Poupon?
Get out of here!
Shag it!
Mine is a ghost!
And of course they have a haunted copy of the Advanced Dungeons and Dragons guide.
Unfortunately, it's not even haunted.
It was just a, what I researched a little bit about the museum.
It's just, he thought Dungeons and Dragons was scary.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, a lot of the people in the 70s saw the Dungeons and Dragons for some stupid
fucking reason.
They thought that it was the gateway to hell and demons and the practice and worship of
the occult and all that.
People thought that you would take acid, do D&D and like jump out the window because you
thought you were an elf.
Yeah.
They thought that that would happen and then we're like, now we have like,
televisions that are strapped to our eyeballs,
and you don't say anything.
Yeah.
You don't say anything at all.
No.
No.
Well, there's also a fair amount of crude paintings.
They include works like paintings of hissing cats,
paintings of haunted houses, a painting of a bold red woman in a green cloak, and a
Frazetta style painting of a naked woman wielding a sword. Probably was a Frazetta. It might have been a Frazetta.
I mean he better have had, if you're gonna fucking, you're not gonna have an original one thing in this house.
Yeah. I feel like a lot of this is an example of,
remember that, they talk about how how that the first special effects or the
Train coming towards the camera. Yeah, and people scream and learn. They're like
It blew their minds, right? I think that their their basement now if we went into their basement
You'd see it. It would look like a shitty thrift store. Yeah, it would look like a big pile of shit
It would look like that was one place who went into New Orleans
It's called like factory of the weird where it was like way way overpriced and everything was just kind of like scatter everywhere
It was like fine, but I think now at the time that was viewed as very
Scary. Yeah, it could be and that it was time has now passed and now we don't find that scary
Yeah, black Sabbath was much scarier back in the 70s album though. Yeah
Oh the first album was super creepy. Yeah, that's the scary one. The other ones is just paranoid
Yeah, paranoid is just a guy or it is a guy in the covers a guy with the sword and a bicycle helmet
Yeah, I don't know why they thought that was evil. I think it goes black Sabbath and also yeah
There was the they were all into the backwards masking stuff. So I feel like I'm gonna point the rats are eating salad
Rhymen masses with masses
From back to museum like fucking the real Annabelle looks super fucking lame. Yeah, it's just a big raggedy and all now was it in a glass case
Yes, the movie. Okay. It was in a glass. Okay, but it's not mom had Yadros in those
We all the weird little fishing boys. Yeah, but it's not the porcelain nightmare. Like it's portrayed in the movie
It's a cloth raggedy and all these are my haunted humbles
Raggedy Ann Doll. These are my haunted hummels.
But I will always find that scarier.
I find that scarier.
I hate scary dolls in movies.
I hate when they overset deck on the scary things.
I think it's stupid because no,
to me the actual Raggedy Ann Doll that is Annabelle
is way freakier if it's actually doing the things
it's saying that it's doing.
Why not set it on fire?
We've talked about this.
It's a very bad idea. Because if if you do that you just destroy the vessel you don't
destroy the demon you're doing Patrick Wilson doing ed well if I'm doing
better is like because if you do that you just destroy the vessel I just
destroyed it's hard to do it's hard to do that yeah cuz it's a stupid accent
but it's bad but it's Patrick Wilson being so charming. Yeah, I'm just looking at his mouth.
I believe everything that he says.
See, I'm turned on to Vera.
See, I find her in this film.
But I feel like she is not the sex in that movie.
No, she's not the sex.
He's the sex in the movie.
She's more the maternal, like, comforting presence.
But she's the sex in everything else she's in.
Yeah, but I can't apply it.
To her Lorraine. Hmm. I liked her moon-like miles the bartender. Yeah, gave me drunk and shit cuz I'm sad.
Hahahaha
The Warrens claim to have extensive photographic evidence of paranormal phenomena
But the bulk of the photographs that they have allowed the public to see is just blobs of light.
Now there are a lot of ways that this can happen, especially with film, but usually
these light blobs are created when the light from a camera flash is reflected back at the
lens causing an overexposed hazy blob to appear in the finished product.
In other words, the Warrens just didn't know how to take a fucking picture and they took
their mistakes as proof of the paranormal.
See, this is what you don't fundamentally understand.
This is coming from Ed Warren and I like that because it's, he talks about this, why it
looks like globules.
You know, glancing around the dark room, you see two bluish orbs of light, roughly the
size of golf balls, floating near each other about five feet off the floor.
As you watch, you might also see streaks of light flash away from your body.
This is electromagnetic energy being drawn from your aura.
In no time at all, these two balls of light come together and emerge into a larger ball,
about the size of a grapefruit.
The ball will then elongate into a tall cigar-shaped size of a human being.
Instead of the orbs of light, other people report seeing hundreds of tiny pinpoints of
light in the cluster that, like the orbs, blend into a larger cylindrical globe.
In other case, when in this tall bioluminescent globe, the definable features of a person
will begin to emerge until the spirit is manifested as much as it possibly can.
And to be accurate, by the way, it's called the ghost.
If the features are not recognizable to the viewer, if the features are recognizable to the viewer,
it's an apparition.
By the way, you got a visitor.
Your impression is like he's doing a set of bench presses.
To me, it sounds like he's trying to work through
a really big pastrami sandwich.
You know who Vicky is, look at him.
He's like, hey, hey, hey, hey. You can't get me now, ghost. I at him, he's like, Come on!
You can't get me now, Ghost.
I'm not gonna be with you now, Ghost.
I can't sit in that chair if you ain't got a pillow on it. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh uhhhhh uhhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh As of 1997, when this article was written by the Skeptical Society, the Warrens have
posted on their website that using flash makes capturing a ghost more likely, meaning that
they probably weren't even aware that they themselves were creating the conditions for
their alleged ghost photography.
How else are they supposed to know to get their pictures taken?
You want these ghosts to fucking show the good side of the cameras so you can show the
scientists make a lot of money? So they're talking about civil rights, very special companies.
That's what you gotta get in there.
Oh I know, I saw the ghosts said.
Oh you gotta take their picture.
They're so thick today.
Oh the ghosts are thick today.
The Warrens also claim to have video evidence of the paranormal, the most famous being Ed's
White Lady of the Union Cemetery video.
In it, a human figure is seen skulking behind some tombstones, but the video is taken from
such a distance and at such low resolution that it's impossible to determine any details
about it.
Furthermore, Ed Warren almost never let anyone take any of his evidence or make copies for
further analysis.
Also Ed could control the narrative completely when it came to his and Lorraine's investigations.
That might be the reason why we have no definitive, giant, like theoretical discussion about the
quote unquote capital P phenomena.
It's because of what you'd call
compelling material gatekeeping that they, this is across the board.
Every single source I have ever read, you know, arts parts, you got this stuff that's
hanging out somewhere that nobody gets to see.
George Knapp's got stuff that we can't see.
Jacques Vallee's got stuff that we can't see.
NIDS has got stuff that we can't see. Robert Bigelow has got information that we can't see Jacques Valais got stuff that we can't see Nids has got stuff that we can't see Robert Bigelow has got information that we can't have and it's all just like if you guys
All just fucking got together and showed everybody your fucking horse shit
You might get some legit money from the government to resource it and guess what you guys all all will get to fucking
You'll make your money and shit. You'll get all your stuff, but it's like without would you not we gotta see it
You see this one big problem there Henry is that it's just it's not there
But they just don't have it yeah launch across the table
I see compelling footage every day. Some of it, this one recent one I watched and it was...
Is this ghost or?
No, no, it's a ghost. It was like this woman was getting called into a...
What was she doing?
...this like...
Back office of some kind?
Back office of some kind.
Did she steal something?
Yes.
These ghosts are so naughty.
These ghosts are thoroughly searched by these store owners.
Well in the only video the men from Ness were allowed to take from Ed's private collection,
a man was purported to dematerialize.
The subject enters the room, stands in front of a mounted camera, scratches his head, and seems to disappear.
And after he disappears, a ghostly white light follows.
And as Ed and the two Ness investigators watched the video, Ed said, matter of factly, quote,
That kid disappeared.
Can you imagine?
Like, it's the same as, eh?
It's like, you know when you try to show your friend a funny video or video you think is funny on YouTube and you're like
Eh? Eh?
Like as they're watching and they're like thanks, you know you could imagine just his big fat head
Sweat pouring into his ass like on a eh ghost eh see?
Eh? Look right there. Ghost? Eh? What are you?
You're supposed to talk them into it before they see it.
Eh? Right there.
Huh? You're watching it. Eh? He him into it before they see it. Yeah, right there
He real with me I'm Ed Laureen's over there
Good Give me a hundred dollars. Fly from your grave.
But whatever the case, this Raggedy Ann doll was massive. It was three feet tall with long dangling legs.
It was a grippable doll.
It was super grippable. It was kissable.
Kissable and huggable.
I actually don't... I think that they were all that big for a period of time.
I think the people liked bigger dolls back in the day.
Those old GI Joes were huge. Yeah. Well made of cloth and stuffing, this doll wore bloomers and a paisley shirt and
had the trademark red yarn hair of every Raggedy Ann doll as well as the printed face featuring
the large black eyes and the triangle nose. Now within days, Donna, her roommate Angie
and Angie's fiance Lou, they all noticed that there was something off about this doll.
At first, there were just small movements,
like changes in the positions of its limbs.
Sometimes the doll would be found with its arms crossed,
or...
...
...or it would be found standing upright on its own feet.
It's me.
I'm up. Hi.
Take me outside to pee.
Oh no, I'm shit.
The upright position was particularly disturbing considering how Raggedy Ann was a floppy sort
of doll, didn't have any internal wires that could make an upright stance possible.
But soon after the changes in position, Donna and Angie would come home to find that the
doll had moved to an entirely different room, seemingly of its own volition.
On one occasion, Donna left the doll on the couch when she went to work, but when she
returned the doll was on her bed and the door to her bedroom had been closed.
I'm changing my wetted bloomers. her bed and the door to her bedroom had been closed.
Donna and Angie claimed, or should I say the Warrens claimed that a month after the activity began they began finding messages on parchment
paper clearly written by a child that read help us or help Lou referencing
Angie's fiance from there the activity escalated after the doll had once again
moved itself to another room but this imagine trying to go to take a shit and
you open up the door and Annabelle's just sitting on the
toilet. Just like that scared me. Like first of all, like that's just scary. Yeah. And then it's also like, uh, you pay right
here. Yeah. But it has a fucking bathroom. You think someone's got to pay rent in order to use a bathroom? That far as I'm
going? Hey, my home. Yeah. Oh yeah. That's right. I forget you get to pay toilet in your home.
Yeah, oh, yeah, that's right. I forget you get to pay toilet in your home
But this time when Donna picked up the doll She found what appeared to be drops of blood on the back of the dolls hands and chest
Quite concerned by this point Donna and her roommate engaged in the services of a spirit medium
The medium immediately called for a seance and during the ritual the medium said that she had contacted the spirit of a young girl who had once lived on the property where Donna
and Angie's apartment building had been constructed.
The spirit's name was Annabelle Higgins, and her lifeless body had been found on the
very land where Donna and Angie lived when Annabelle was just seven years old.
But the spirit said she felt safe with Donna and Angie and therefore wanted to stay.
So despite warnings from Angie's fiance Lou that the doll was in fact evil and Annabelle
was not what she claimed to be, Donna and Angie gave Annabelle permission to inhabit
the doll permanently.
After that, the situation escalated again.
Spirits love being squatters. Yeah, they
love being invited. Yes. Now, perhaps because he'd sounded the warning bells, Lou became Annabelle's
focus. He began having recurring nightmares and one night awoke to find himself completely paralyzed.
Sleep paralysis. Standing at the edge of the bed was who else but the floppy raggedy and all with the big black eyes named Annabelle.
Hi, you sleeping? Yeah, you trying to sleep?
From what Lou told the Warrens, or at least what the Warrens said Lou told them, Annabelle slowly glided up Lou's body.
It's a nice leg. Strong shin, thick thigh.
Oh, you're not stick.
You better want to watch some of that.
Seven-year-old.
No.
You're ghostly legal.
I know.
I noticed you're now speaking like Michael Jackson.
He ignorant.
Every child safe with me.
I have a dream about every child. Every child safe with me
Before Lou knew it the floppy doll was choking him with so much force that he blacked out came his pants
God Wow Wow the next day Lou and Angie were in the apartment studying maps for an upcoming road trip when the apartment got
Early quiet Rustling was heard coming from Donna's bedroom
That's not rustling. Shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh Lou and Angie apprehensively checked the room. There they found only Annabelle, tossed on the floor in a corner. As soon as Lou got close to the doll though, he felt like someone was behind him and in
a split second Lou was doubled over in pain.
His shirt was quite suddenly stained with blood and when he removed it, they found seven
distinct claw marks on his back, hot as if they had just been burned
Mysteriously the wounds fully healed and disappeared within two days
No
Mysterious as Henry said also seven doesn't make sense. We're gonna get there
Okay, yes it does because it's and it's a special number like how three see three and anytime you see threes
It's a mockery of the trilogy of Trinity the trilogy. No, it's the diehard trilogy
Three dots it is a it's a mockery of the diehard trilogy
But there are four diehard don't count the other two. I don't count anything
Three are obviously the best ones.
The other two were money grabs because Bruce Willis was having more and more advancing dementia.
And so I don't count those.
But when it's seven, it's a phone number.
Well yeah, but claws are four or three.
So I guess maybe one hand had four and the other one had three.
And the fourth didn't get you.
Yeah. Okay. All right. I can deal with this cool
Now after the physical attacks Donna contacted an Episcopalian priest who contacted another priest who contacted
Ed and Lorraine Warren. Yeah, you'd imagine hitting up Episcopalian priests and asking them to do jack shit
Yeah, maybe like call a Catholic. I don't do anything
This shit is chill. Yeah, the whole reason why we're here
Yeah, you're I'm one of the nice ones kind of and the Warrens immediately knew that this was the sort of case
They prayed for daily. Oh, yeah, they were like, yes. Yeah love this shit and this is local
This is that and again, this is when they're still just trying to make their nut
This is their first
The last one we just heard, this is just them
to last, you know, when we were kind of hearing them, they were just revving up their ghost hunting
like industry. This is like their first real big get. 1970. Now during their first meeting,
Angie suggested the possibility of moving to escape the entity, but as Ed would say again and
again to the folks he claimed to help, moving would be
a futile gesture because the spirit had already attached itself.
See what he knew immediately that it wasn't a spirit because he walked in there and like
you know because the thing about Ed Warren is that it's all about style.
So he walks in total control, total calm, walks in being like, hey, how you doing?
It's nice to see you.
Oh hey, this was a got a little ghost doll situation
You know don't worry. We're gonna handle this
You got any Pepsi I gotta take the two at the same time cuz if not I throw up
All right, so I went down the belly or is it we're looking at it right?
So she's jumping back and forth and that's what he was saying is that human spirit Has no power to move things so the first thing he says gotta be demon gotta because it's moving things back and forth
No way would he fuck with you if he wasn't right especially you wouldn't get physically hurt
Yeah, he's heard the scratches that's a demon right boom immediately
But what he said truly was like what so what you guys did was you set up a bad situation?
But the way we know that you are definitely not like it's it's also smells
It's like farting the dolls fart weird shit's going on back and forth and he was like you are
You're haunted by demons. They might demons though. They don't attack. They don't haunt places. They haunt
People yes if they move it makes his commute worse
Plus if they move it makes his commute worse. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're real close to me right now.
No, no, no, no, I don't want to take the highway.
When they asked if they could just destroy the doll, Ed said that didn't help either.
What the fuck is wrong with you?
That's always how they react.
You're like, whoa, that's fucking destroyed, Ed!
Because the problem was not the doll itself.
I mean, the doll was a doll like any other.
Like it was just another Raggedy Ann doll, but it had become a vessel for a demon.
If it helps, it's more or less Chucky.
But with the demon instead of a serial killer.
There's nothing special about that good guy doll.
It was just that that was the good guy doll that Brad Dorff chose to inhabit.
By Ed's estimation, if these people had waited another two or three weeks,
one of them would
have become possessed.
But one way or another, what was going on with Annabelle was the fault of the people
who might have become possessed because for Ed, demonic possession was always about blame.
He said that the responsibility for this whole scenario was on Donna and Angie
Because they'd given the entity recognition in the first place after the mysterious movements of the doll
Which I don't really get because what is he saying that the doll is fucking flitting around the house. You're supposed to ignore it. Yes
He says it's on you you got to ignore it you have to literally just like it's you don't even talk
You don't talk about it. I'll not acknowledge it at all. That is what he says
It's how you deal with ghosts and trolls where you do not give and rats anything
You give them nothing you're supposed to be bored
Like what they want is because again, it's a demon because if it was a human ghost
It would be communicating with you in a more direct way in a peaceful way
Looking for like a lot of times. It's a it's through something whether through a Ouija board or like a pendulum
But he also said the Ouija boards were evil and did not he did not I have clarification
He said there's nothing wrong with the Ouija board
It's just that the Ouija board more often than not if you don't know how to use it leads to issues with you with again
It's on you. You're the problem.
It's always you.
You're not doing it right.
Yes, you're not doing it right.
The Parker Brothers send instructions.
There's a whole thing.
There's like a, it's an ancient mechanism.
It's an ancient mechanism, but he,
so he feels if you see any sort of activity,
this is called the infestation period.
Things are sort of building up,
and he believes that you're, believes that you're literally not even supposed
to look at it, you're just supposed to act like it's that.
If you engage with it at all, you're giving it a hold
into this world, because all it wants is your attention,
Marcus, it's all sitting there no matter what it's doing,
it's flicking back and off because it wants to say hello.
It wants you shutting the light off, back and forth,
it's playing with chicken balls, it wants to say hello.
All right, but you can't let it.
You can't let it.
Yeah, cause then otherwise it becomes the oppression section.
But you can't even mention it to your wife or anything.
Nothing.
Jack shit.
So what happens if it's playing with your dick and the balls
and you're ignoring it, but you still come?
Yeah.
Blame it on your thoughts.
Say, oh, I must have rubbed it on my jeans hard earlier today.
Well, he said they'd given the entity recognition in the first place. That was
bad. They made it worse by giving, by holding the seance, but the worst
mistake they made was giving the entity permission to enter the doll. And Ed's
words, doing this was like handing a maniac a loaded gun and so Ed and Lorraine it's very hyperbolic and so
Ed and Lorraine took Annabelle the doll into their custody although I'm a little
unclear on how this works because Ed had just told the girls the demonic energy
was attached to them in particular and moving wouldn't help oh because there's
a bit of a jump here where he did bring in an exorcist.
So when he came in with Annabelle,
they had their first meeting.
It was all like, he talked to Annabelle,
he's like, what are you doing Annabelle,
you wanna fuck with me?
And then nothing happened, right?
But then he came back with the priest,
they exorcised the doll, they did it all
like they had a whole process inside of it.
They exorcised the doll, they exorcised the lady,
they went, they did all these squirted holy water around because that's all he does. Cause that's the thing
with Ed Warren is that he also says he's immune to the phenomenon. He can't see it. It does
not engage with him, right? More often than not. That's why he has to do what he calls,
he's got to do a religious provocation. Which we'll get to the next story. But he cleared
it. So technically he fixed them.
He fixed them.
But then he took the doll.
Ah.
Being like, well you guys essentially can't be responsible with this doll anymore, so
I'm going to take it.
Okay.
But they can just get any doll and offer it up to Annabelle.
I think this was a, again, it's all about salesmanship.
Yeah.
Ed Warren more than anything.
Like, and Ali was looking over my shoulder
And there's like a picture of it all through all the YouTube
Content he's doing like Ed Warren is leading a tour of his little museum in his house, and he's got the sunglasses inside
He's got the big scarf on green and purple light on him and like I'm sitting there
I mean like you know what you believe it some people think that this guy's a
Carney and Natalie's like that's a Carney unlike any Carney I've ever seen like that is the Lord of carnies
Yes, and so he wanted it that doll to be a part of his collection
Yeah
Now for as far as possessed objects go does it have to be something that looks like a human or could it be like a bottle of coke or a
Lamb anything we learned when we did our haunted dolls and redux recently that it is just more
Quantical powerful to use a human shaped doll. Yeah
Well from how they told it
The demon immediately tried killing the Warrens on the drive back to their home in Monroe
By causing the cars power steering and brakes to fail meanwhile like cutting to him eating a crawler like you know like you know like
44 ounce Duncan with him with like four bear claws been like
Engine light going on Annabelle is stuck in the wheel
But right after Ed threw some holy water in the backseat like a father absentmindedly
Slapping at his noisy kids during the road trip
Back to Winnipeg the Warrens were able to get home without further incident
The warrants were able to get home without further incident now Edna rang claimed that for weeks afterwards
Annabelle's abilities expanded to levitation and it continued movement around their house. Don't you fold Annabelle?
Listen, I'm gonna sit here and I gotta write a letter. I gotta write a letter to Jimmy Carter and ask him
Honestly, what's going on? But what I need you to do is not do nothing. Annabelle, you sit in that chair.
You can't float down Annabelle, I'm gonna fucking tie you to the chair.
You're scraping me out. It's like a guy with a bad Bichon frieze.
True to form, once the Warrens were the only witnesses, they claimed that Annabelle could make an ethereal black cat appear, which would just as quickly disappear.
After a year of putting up with Annabelle, during which the doll supposedly tried killing
a priest and caused a necklace to explode all while terrorizing the most traumatized cat seeing phantoms everywhere, like just all day long,
just devils, witches, and haunted brides, and it's just like, listen, I'm already a
black cat.
Do you think my dreams aren't scary?
Get me out of here.
Call the police.
Well, after a year, they finally locked her away in the infamous
positively do not open case where she has remained ever
since. Well, that fucking that priest did treat Annabelle
disrespectfully. He did pick up Annabelle.
He's like because he tried to show that there's no power in the
doll and he picked up Annabelle and he's like, you have no
power here, Annabelle.
And he threw it across the room.
And Ed Warren was like,
you're not gonna like that.
You're not gonna like what she does now.
And so he got into a car accident.
She said Lorraine was like,
be careful when you're driving on your way home.
And then the priest almost got into an accident
and then he called later on.
He's like, why did you tell me to be careful on the road?
And Lorraine was like, ah!
Flap your tits around.
Were you scared?
Are you able to sleep tonight?
Yes.
The ghosts are real.
You know, England's running out of ghosts.
They don't deserve them.
What are you going gonna do? Listen?
Thank you for hanging out with us go and check us out on patreon. That's patreon.com
slash LP o TL
We love you over there. That's patreon.com slash last podcast on the left
Side stories coming to Chicago on September 13th
Henry and I are hitting the Windy City the night before the sold-out show at the Riviera
But Henry and I September 13th at the Park West theater come get into it
Baby last podcast and I left sold out you missed it too bad
So sad side stories come and get some. We still
got a couple tickets left and I love you guys and I know you want to come party
with Henry and I and then afterwards I'm gonna get sick on all your horrible
food. I mean horrible as in delicious but horrible as in like it's horrible for me
and if I stay there any longer than a couple of days my heart will explode
Okay, so I'm gonna come I'm eating going to wiener circle. I'm getting the dogs. I'm going to whatever the
what's the what's the one with they put the the the pizzas in a like a
In like a French onion soup crock and you flip it upside down that weird little spot. I'm gonna eat that shit
Okay, so fucking come hang out with Henry and I we're gonna be there last podcasts on the left is touring
We're gonna be hitting up Iceland Reykjavik. There's some sh- tickets left in London. Come see us there, New York the King's Theatre and
Wiltern on November 2nd.
So come check that out in Los Angeles.
We have a lot of more shows that are going to come.
We're going to keep going next year.
Nothing's announced yet, but keep your ear to the ground, man.
We'll see you next week with a very special episode of Last Podcast on the Left. I'm really excited for you all to check
this out. And eddytoons.com baby, go get that Ham Daddy merch. I love you. Listen to The Brighter Side
and be good to yourselves and hail Ham.