Last Podcast On The Left - Episode 143: The Worst Ways to Die

Episode Date: February 17, 2015

We cover some of the world's worst ways to die, from airplane crashes to grisly executions to one of the most savage and cruel things we've ever covered: the Concrete Encased High School Girl murder.

There's no place to escape to. This is the last time on the left That's when the cannibalism started What was that? Are we ready to go yeah God fat on fat violence he's been doing push-ups Sick python arms, man. I got big wobbly meats underneath my hard hard chest Yeah, that's disgusting. I can't I'm not envious of what your eyes can see Marcus Marcus hasn't worn a shirt for the last three episodes. Well, they've been very good. So maybe that's uh, maybe that's a good luck charm

Welcome to the show. That's Marcus parks. I'm Ben kissle. We're joined by a newly muscular Henry Zabrowski big arms Henry Zabrowski. Yeah, I lifted my own weight Yeah, I got all of this just meat is all thick and oh my nipples are hard. Can you see him? Oh, no, no, no, he's uh, the camera's a little too low. Stand up a little bit. Come on stand up stand up. Oh They are hard Oh, they're so hard. Look at him. He's taking them I've never been playing with them like radio dials I've never been so happy to see the apple logo on the back of a computer in my life

Thank god. I'm not looking at that screen We did it. We have finally made it to october. I have needed october in my life So hard. There is nobody's scary in LA. No, oh, there's some scary people out there All right, let's talk about the the wild and wonderful world of weird and bizarre deaths, huh? Oh, yeah Yeah, that's today's subject. We have really hit I think with this episode. It's been a while that I feel like we've done something That's like truly brutal except for the fact we did just cover chicotello and I and that just shows how warped My brain has become right. Yeah. I think everything that we've done is fairly. Uh, it's considered fairly brutal Yes, but this is going to be especially brutal

I kind of hit me in the middle of the night of like now that we're start We're you know, it's satan season. It's time for us to head towards the leathery, you know We're all gonna be there on the on farmer joe's farm when the big leathery egg that's taken over his whole fucking barn Cracks open and it's and it's Bessemoff like, you know, the seventh Hero of satan himself, you know, does it have to be on a farm or can it be in a more urban area? I'm hoping farm. Okay. Let's let's at least give him some care Yeah, you just want to hand you have some chickens around and stuff like that. Yeah, make it feel right. Yes We're building up the halloween season and I was like, well, what is a good way to put people in a more of a

You know disgusted frame of mind in a scary frame of mind and thinking of like, what's the worst way you can fucking die? That's right. What are the worst ways you can die? I didn't know before Before learning about the content of today's episode that uh, there are different ways And certainly better and worse ways to get off the face of the earth. Yeah, absolutely And we're gonna start with a pretty bad one. Yeah, death by embarrassment. Oh, no Did I forget my pants and I have to give a public speech. I'm embarrassed Oh my god, did I sit in the pie? Did I sit in the family pie? I've got berries on my bottom You can't actually die of embarrassment. Oh my when stress or anxiety levels rise

There's a surge of adrenaline that enters the bloodstream and it can actually kill you It can cause the uh, the heart to cease cause cardiac arrest the same way you can die from fight Fright or from sexual excitement. Oh, this is why you can die from getting hard Uh, if you get too hard, yeah, you can only get a certain amount of hard I guess chicka-tillo was always gonna be safe then You would have lived forever if the Moscow if the russian government didn't kill him This is my question too. This is a pussy way to die Correct. Well, you have to be a pussy to die by embarrassment. Yes. I well, you couldn't be a stand-up comedian

That's for certain because it's a whole life full of embarrassment Death by embarrassing you've never seen the weird sexual effect. There's a weird sexual fetish that is also Built into embarrassment like seeing people embarrassed like mid-fart and stuff like that and people jerk off to it I could see how that's erotic We're like busting into like a woman's house while she's all like She's I don't know what she's doing. She's like cleaning the things and she's wearing a diaper She's clean the oven and then you surprise her and she's all embarrassed I can't imagine how you'd find that sexually harassing hot stuff

You do seem to be as hard your penis seems to be about as hard as your nipples right now I will say that Henry. I just want to see a woman for it. I just want to see her for it Would you possibly have one if you did see a woman fart? I could be having That's great. I mean death by embarrassment That's why I always carry Mentos in my back pocket So I can just pop one of those and everything is going to go as smooth as can be and I'll uh, I'll get that record deal after all Well a much more terrifying way of dying is something that all of us have thought about at one time or another Dying by plane crash now. I've never really thought about the logistics of dying in a plane crash

It turns out dying by plane explosion not that bad much better Instant so it when you're in a plane first of all you're about six miles in the sky And if you start going in freefall first what sets in is probably hypoxia Which means that all of the oxygen removes itself from your brain so you're gonna pass out But you'll also probably wake up and when you wake up You're going to be going down towards the ground at 120 miles an hour for a full two to three minutes Before you hit the ground you got a lot of thinking time. That's good You can make your final phone calls and cancel up cancel that pizza you had

It's going to be delivered to you a lot of people believe that you you know, you'd sit and you'd like contemplate like What are the things that I remember that I love to do like my family and remember my daughter I remember my dog or remember, you know the time I hit the home run of the baseball game But I think most of that two to three minutes is going to be spend going like Yeah, well you suckers are screaming someone's eating all the pretzels this guy right over here one single packet I don't think so buddy. This thing is going down the two to three minutes has to be the most terrifying Thing on the face of the planet. It seems like it would go by pretty slow One of your slower two to three minutes in in uh in your life, uh, you know a little lifespan

But you probably got a good chance of getting a girl to flash it. Oh, yeah If you want to join the mile high club, I think there's a good chance that that's some potential there So I heard on this podcast that uh, you know, it's going to take us about two minutes to get to the ground So, uh, hand job and you don't want to do it Yeah, let me just let me just suck on your feet. I mean come on I'm finally the pressure is off. I can just ask. Yeah, I just suck on your beautiful feet you huge woman No one's going to be there to remember until they go through the corpses as the plane crashes And just amongst the rubble is a man suck

I don't know the man in 3d has toe mouth He could have died of that before but luckily the plane obliterated all around him But we also learned about the when the Malaysian flight went down We also learned that a plane can simultaneously fall apart Isn't that a new fear? That's a fear. I'm just like a plane can literally just because they were talking about matter-of-factly on cnn just being like it's like Unfortunate, you know sometimes there's a thing called this automatic destabilization where the plane just turns into confetti And there's nothing you can do about it and it happens randomly

You can't fly that confetti airlines It's a bunch of clowns running that thing and of course the plane that went down after 9 11 here in queens The back of it fell off. Yeah, that's something you want. Yeah, I always say I would love to get bored of playing them Where the back stays on That's what I like the best. Yeah, I think if I ever have a private plane What I will do is I will have a mechanic just walk around the plane with me and just like have him jump up and down on the wings and on the back Just to make sure it's solid. Yeah, of course the old hammer test. That's good

So say you're in a plane crash and you somehow miraculously survive you make it to a desert island Unfortunately, the desert island is just a big rock. There's no vegetables on there to eat. There's no plant life There's no animal life. What are you going to do? You're going to starve to death Oh, I was going to say find a volleyball put a face on that volleyball and have a new buddy That's a reference to castaway. I even have a hard time just the hour before I eat dinner So I can't imagine starving to death. I get hangry like I'm a hangry person I hate what you just said. That's like it's like a Commercial for what's one of those fat restaurants people love to go to Denny's. Yeah Denny's

Yeah, are you getting hangry and it's just a Better pre-eat before hitting the Denny's. Well, that was one of the worst uses of that Ray Rice elevator video I've ever seen Ray Rice you getting hangry Someone's got a case of the nibbles This Denny's Ed might not make it to air So a body if you didn't know a body can live for up to 60 days without food You know, I was thinking when I was reading that Shiva remember Terry Shiva death watch where they took the tube out of her And we live in this humane world where you can't kill her, but you can watch her slowly devolve. Oh my god

If it doesn't go by I don't think of Terry Shiva. I can't not Oh, I just I can't even I wouldn't work such a thing upon any one of my enemies Yeah, she was eaten by the inside eaten by your own body. It sounds like something your mother would say Henry Every mother did say that when it came down to Shiva. Oh my god Terry Shiva, uh, Henry Thomas if it ever comes to that if I'm ever a vegetable I want you to get your father's hand god, and I want you to stick it in my fucking mouth I want you to blow up my brains in the backyard, and I want you to do it Henry Thomas Literally had that conversation with my mother

Your mother is smart and wise Yeah, Shiva watch that was there was a reality show for a couple of months Yeah, it was man, and that is a boring webcam. It was a very boring webcam, but people loved it So after less than a week the body starts to feed off stored fat for energy But this is good though because this is where you really get your weight loss and everyone and the girl's like Oh, you're looking so hot and so attractive Ben. Oh, I'm so happy that we can finally date now You don't just have a great personality. You've also got a penis. I can find But before the month is up actually you will be losing 18 percent of your starting way. That's good. Yeah for you. That's great

For me. I'm dead Hmm. That's good That's good though. That's good, but then you wouldn't have anyone to run the board on the podcast. That's bad It's fine. We can train a pig to do it. It's so easy to do I see what you do. You just go be do it be be be it's easy That's true. That's a good point Henry And then of course eventually your body starts to consume its own muscle and organs in order to get the energy That it needs to survive and that is how you actually die. Your body essentially eats itself

Yeah, kind of cool the way the body does that though, huh? It is kind of cool. It's bizarre because we're also going to see several because you realize your body has uh It happens a lot in many of these weird deaths Is that your body has these white blood cells and what it does it protects your immune your immune system protects you with using white blood cells But if it just it gets confused and thinks that you're the problem it kills you instead Yeah, I know it's crazy. We're just we're just Bags filled filled with uh blood cells and the blood cells are ones that have all the power Yeah, they make all the important decisions or the internal shadow cover all of our organs are just kamikaze

Is ready to die for the cause Guys guys guys, can we please can we please at least hold on for a little bit longer? Yeah, we're not safe even in our own bodies dangerous Let's move on to some particularly painful and excruciating executions Oh, all right. Well, first of all, let's start with crushed to death Of course once you're the body is crushed what happens is toxins start building up at the crush side Which includes large amounts of potassium which can cause cardiac arrest and it also produces myoglobin

Which can result in kidney failure myoglobin Yes, myoglobin Myoglobin which is a problem, which is what you'll be screaming when your sternum is crushed Yep in the late 19th century The criminal was tied to the leg of the elephant by his waist and taken for a little run around the city And after that the criminal was made to kneel in place his head on a stone And then the elephant crushed the accused head with his foot, but I don't want to crush his head today I just want to be a circus elephant

The crowd loves me They should have dressed it up like a melon because elephants live stomping melons. Yes, they do. That's one thing I know um Can also if you're stoned right now, I'd like you to just imagine your head Lying on the block as a fucking big old elephant. It's like And there's a magic because it's a slow crush. Oh, yeah, it just hits your head and then it just Is Can you hurry it up? Can you hurry it up there elephant?

I'm moving as fast as I can The problem is sir is that you're wearing that huge hat The pork by hat saved the man So now we've got uh, let's stay in the realm of execution by animals now in 1893 the negus of abyssinia He discovered that one of his servants was plotting to kill him So he sentenced the man to have his tongue cut out his right hand amputated And then he was turned loose in the desert to be attacked and eaten by hyenas now This is hyenas kill humans. Uh, what they do to smaller prey

They just shake them and they break until it breaks the spine But on uh human victims they just hop on and start eating you while you're still alive They're great to have in the audience though if you want to do a type five before they kill you Yeah, they are always Can you imagine if one of them still had the voice of whoopee goldberg from the line? That would be fun and that would be funny in a reverent like the view is It's just sort of fucking chewing at your guts and you start screaming like i'm maniac I would still rather have that happen than watch the view. Oh the view is great

Oh, i'm so sorry to hit on a sensitive subject mr. Parks Good lord listen to page seven for more opinions on how great the view is All right on november 13th in uh the year 10 o 2 Ethel read the unready ordered his people to rise up and slay all the See if you're gonna have a nickname let's not be about how how like hesitant you are as a leader I'm not ready to lead vote for me. Okay Ethel read the unready he ordered uh people to rise up and slay all the danes in england And a massacre took place in which the children of danish women were buried up to their waste in the ground

And then they set mastiff dogs to maul the children to death. I'm gonna say I think he was ready That seems that seems about perfect. This this man was a king. Uh, this make you. I mean he was ethyl read the unready Can you imagine also like the teeth just like scraping on your fucking scalp pulling all the fucking meat off the top of your head Is it's going? And you're just going Nice puppy Of course, there are pythons and anacondas Uh, they usually don't they they say that you know you get killed from being squeezed to death

That's usually cardiac arrest from the lack of oxygen But occasionally snakes will begin to swallow their victims after the squeeze While the people are still alive. That's why I never go out into the woods or the forest without your flute The flute is the only instrument that can charm the snake Until the snake slows up shows up and before that you were the most obnoxious fucking person on the vacation That's right. You're the asshole with the flute, right? Everyone's mocking you and laughing at you for your vest and your bizarre hat and your Dumb curly shoes And speaking of snakes this is this is another thing to this is another sexual fetish

Which is getting consumed by giant snakes. Yeah, so or half of these things so far that we've covered Would just make someone bone hard Until they're dead. Yeah, I mean, yeah, I would assume probably even getting stepped on by the elephant That might have made somebody quite a rose. Oh, yeah, there's plenty of people. They're in a crush born. That's true Yeah, yeah, yeah people are some people. Yeah, that would make them them give them the most righteous bone They've ever had they'd be shooting ropes all over their tunic calves And when the elephant coming on a thing because don't be like, oh, I'm gonna get so fucking crushed here, dude Yeah, man

Staying on snakes the swedish they had a method of execution called the cave of roses Oh, that sounds like a great cave In which the victim would be confined to a pitch black cave filled with numerous snakes and poisonous reptiles to be stung And bitten to death. Oh, I thought so the cave was named on opposite day Yeah, I was thinking more of a valentine's day at the olive garden kind of thing Yeah, it's just a pit full of snakes. I thought that there was gonna be a net all you could eat possible There's the never-ending soup and bread Yeah, and what kind of spaghetti is this it's moving and curling up my leg little snakes

Now the Ebo tribe of nigeria They sentence members of their tribe who commit adultery to be taken in front of the entire village Strip naked tied together and forced to have sex with each other to the sound of drums to the sounds of drums and whistles See this isn't bad so far. That's the first part of it Eventually the victims would be dragged to the banks of a sacred pool Where the smell of blood having attracted crocodiles The two would be hurled into the water to be eaten. Oh, not to have sex with the crocodiles But also god, how sexy is that? How sexy is it? No, it's just like we get to pierce the the void one last time

I know it's just like an imbecile. I'm gonna pound you around until we're pulled at the part of my crocodiles And she's gonna be like, oh you mix my boobies turn right around. It's like, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, let's go, baby Yeah, this is our best date ever, baby You can do any kind of fetish the thing you want. I suppose you're tied up So hopefully you're into that I think that it is kind of nice that they let them have the public sex Yeah, do you think that the public sex is nice? It's better than just having them being eaten by alligators. Yeah You know what? I think you do make a good point there. Yeah, I mean, I guess they're laughing at them or something

I mean, if the guy's a small ding dong, that's embarrassing. Yeah. Yeah, it is. I would assume they're probably I think they throw things at them as well Uh, it doesn't seem like a fun party for the people. You'd be amazed what you can spin into a sexual fetish if you have to Old tomatoes can get get somebody going Let's move on just some generally weird executions. I do want to say this about snakes There was that story about the woman who would lie next to her python snake and he kept on getting larger and larger And she thought it was so cute Don't do that because what it's doing is measuring your body and as soon as it's longer taller than you it eats you Wow, so do not cuddle with your snake. It is a reptile and it wants to eat you

I didn't know that So let's move on some just generally weird executions By the way, I got all these from this wonderful book that I have by Jeffrey Abbott. It's called Execution the guillotine the pendulum the thousand cuts the Spanish donkey and 66 other ways of putting someone to death It's also called the don't talk to me on the subway book Boy, people do not talk to me on the subway when I read this book The Spanish donkey is also an amazing Mexican restaurant here in Los Angeles And you really you guys got to come down check it out. It's it's incredible

I know the Spanish donkey sounds like something you get rewarded with for your birthday at chilies You know like oh better give him the Spanish donkey. It's just a sopping wet pinata just full of rice and beans The pinata burrito special First I wanted the regular pinata daddy. You're getting a goddamn Spanish donkey because this is a Mexican themed birthday I put your kids in here and we're having a good time. All right, your mother left I mean, it's difficult when the visitation rights fall on the kid's birthday You know every other thursday. I've never planned a birthday alone before. I'm a drinking man I work at the girder factory

The girder factory I'm probably a good business to be in at these in these days. Next up is execution by gunpowder In france on february 22nd 1704 Protestants were attacked by Catholics and during the atrocities that followed some of the women were captured and this is a A quote from writings at the time said Henry would you like to take this? They were first violated And had their hands tied and were tied between trees with their heads hanging and their legs apart Well, they were in that position. They opened up their bodies placed their powder horns up inside them

And uh, touch and match the powders It's boom. I'm from oilman was crazy. Wow. Just sounds like a failed turducken on thanksgiving The same conflict also saw prisoners having their mouths filled with gunpowder and having their heads blown to pieces The taste of gunpowder is probably not very good. It's probably awful I think this is one of the better ones though compared to what we've discussed previously so far in the episode This one you're just a human bullet and you just get you you go up pretty quick. It's instant. Yeah It's the anticipation. That's the worst on that. But isn't that always the thing with executions the anticipations anticipation

And again the promise rock hard Any one of these people if they just happen to like this if you wanted to be a human musket Mm-hmm. Boom. That's your that's your fetish. Congratulations There are some people online on youtube, especially they've made a career to drink and drain it when things like that It's possible that you just just swallow it down. Yeah, put some gunpowder in your mouth to see if you can take it At some point they'll run out There's also the nail through the air In 1929 the tyrant who ruled afghanistan

Forgoing his usual method of tying his victim's body to the muzzle of a cannon and firing it Crucified an enemy to the ground and then drove a long nail through his ear and into his brain. So, um Both of those did they learn everything from like wily coyote? Yeah, they both sound like lunatunes deaths There's also necklacing This is a practice that we used by gangs in south africa during recent years It consists of placing a car tire around the neck of a bound victim and setting it on fire The intense heat of the burning material the fumes penetrating the lungs and the

Effect of the molten rubber searing the body made for a slow and horrendous death That's where all the roads are so messed up while the cars are riding on the rims There's no more tires over there a lot of death in south africa. Oh, yes And jewelry shopping is a gambit. Yeah, I never really know what you're about to go do. You're about to go shop for a necklace You better hope you're on good terms with your boyfriend. Yep could get real hot under that collar And then there is being sewn up in an animal's belly. This one is particularly awful This was in greece in the second century as far as we know this only happened once but this account Is concerns a christian woman that was executed. So they killed a donkey. First of all, they removed all the innards

They took the woman They put her inside much like han solo did for luke skywalker and empire strikes back Uh, however, her head was left outside of the body while her head was left outside of the donkey while the rest of her body Was sewed up inside the carcass Then they would throw it out there into the hot sun where the woman would boil inside of the donkey's skin As vultures started eating through the donkey's belly into the woman as she suffered Horrible smells from the rotting donkey Uh and had no choice but to either be eaten by vultures or to starve to death

Well, it's not as funny as jim carrey made it look in ace ventura when nature calls And that could be called the ladonkin. Yes lady donkey dead woman But he's also the inspiration for the donkey character from the shrek film. So that's nice That is a very good good comes from that. Yeah, not a lot of stuff to do. I think that's what we've learned I mean people talk about these days like oh my god. Look at isis. Look at these savages Fucking this book this execution book. We are the most civilized that we have ever been In all of human history and I want to say they are savages and that's still better than what it used to be Yeah, ices is terrible. Yeah, and it's like this is the best time we've ever had as a civilization

Yeah, because now we have tv So at least the isis guys didn't watch tv and so they at least entertained at some point where they never They're not always just thinking of like hey, you know what we could do? We just fucking haul all that donkey and stick that cattle chicken. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah People think that we're better than they used to be but you know somebody getting I don't know why I keep on thinking about the elephant Step it on the head But people used to watch that and going back to shiva. Everyone was watching that too I think that we're just as bad and now it's just but the elephant

I will say again elephant would have made for much better tv than the shiva thing. I agree Because she was just a paperweight woman Well at that point. Yeah, she wasn't going. She could at least have been funny They're gonna put funny signs on her that said like jokes once a day if you want to do that If you want to bump your numbers if you want to get the the followers that you need to Stay around because that's what I've learned from NBC is that you need twitter followers to even to remotely succeed So what you got to do if you were paralyzed and you want to stay alive Put some funny signs on you a funny hat. Yeah, different pictures every day

Yeah, the Snickers company maybe for the chivo situation could have worked out not going anywhere for a while Obviously she's exceptionally hungry Stickers into her mouth and go like like moving the jaw up and down that would have been fun Then she turns into Danny DeVito And then finally we've got tied in a sack with animals. This was a greek I mean come on This was a greek execution for patricide and matricide. That's killing your mother or your father Uh, it began with just being tied in a wolf skin sack and thrown in the water

That was the original punishment for it. This is why you don't want to ask a king what the punishment for Whatever this crime might be like what the punishment should be Well, he's having sex or in the middle of a dump because he's just like Time in a sack with animals. I don't I'm busy Well, yeah, that's what happened is that Pompey the great he amended it to um adding animals He added a dog a rooster a viper and an ape and let's just put a little peacock in there too Just because they're proud and fun. Yeah for the other But I would also say it's like wasn't it just the hassle to get the animals together into the sack

In the first place. Isn't that just a problem with it's two soldiers that are forced to go and like It's like we've got to get a what a viper and a rooster and a fucking monkey Yeah, it sounds like one of the what with it. We put it in what we put it in a big bag I've got I'm literally my feet are rotting because I don't have shoes It sounds like a terrible mission in like an rpg game. Oh Just go collect a chicken a cow a horse and a dog put him in a bag. Yeah fetch quests terrible So let's move on from executions and let's move on to death by science

Now science is a is a particularly merciless killer We knew it could blind people but we did not know it could kill. No, we did not the first up is jesse lazier He was an expert in the yellow fever They called it the american plague Went through america during the 18th and 19th century Uh, he of course was looking for a cure. So what he did is he secretly exposed himself to infected mosquitoes In order to further study the actual disease

Yellow, you know sad is that he did all this just so that becky in the office would want to date him, right, right? And not everyone died from yellow fever most people just get fever headache chills back pain loss of appetite nausea Vomiting and then they walk away, and they never get it again. You only get yellow fever once however lazier did not have the Much needed immune system to beat yellow fever. So his disease moved on to the second phase which Includes liver damage John this which is where the yellow fever part comes from. Yep

abdominal pain and finally bleeding from the mouth eyes And anus and it all gets wrapped up with blood-filled vomit. You know, that's really that's really the definition of just kicking yourself, huh? Yeah, just go back and yellow fever was also an unfortunately named not as big of a disco hit That was an agent theme You know, but it was very it's only heard in several states because apparently it was incredibly racist Ah, yes. Yes, that would have had a good back. Can you please everybody has a yellow fever? Marry my daughter All right, it was all

Japanese man getting someone to marry his daughter The whole song is just marry my daughter. Marry my daughter. You take her from village She was born with no hands or feet, but she very loyal because no one love her Oh, not bad. All right. I'll take her Uh, next up is dr. Henry cotton. He ran the new jersey state hospital at Trenton And he believed that insanity could be cured by removing various body parts and organs from patients Oh, yeah, right on the money He was years ahead years ahead of his time

He's he'd start by removing all the teeth Then he'd move on to the tonsils and the sinuses No, no, no, what I'm telling you Wendy's you got you got the crazy teeth. So we're gonna take them right out of your mouth there Then he would move on to the testicles. Oh, what what what what did did he Clarify what the like if you remove the nuts is that psychosis or is that just aggression? I don't say my nuts have made me make bad decisions, but I don't think they should be punished like that Again, you might be into it though a lot of there is that there is that fetish of removing one's limbs. Yes, there is. Yes Absolutely again, someone be rock hard for this whole fucking thing

I don't know if it was a phrenology type thing where you know, he had that, you know A brain pan chart where he could tell which parts of the body caused which illnesses It seems like he was fairly indiscriminate as far as what he removed dyslexic. You say we're gonna have to take those pinkies Everyone knows dyslexia lies in the pinkies I'm not feeling really I'm not feeling very happy recently. Oh, better better fucking just gut out your belly button I don't know what to do. It's either the belly button or the ear lobes. I can never decide with that one Old woman, of course, he would remove the ovaries. He also removed the gallbladder stomach spleen cervixes colons One example was an 18 year old girl with agitated depression who

Successfully had her upper and lower moral molars extracted. She had a tonsillectomy sinus drainage treatment for an infected cervix Removal of intestinal adhesions all without affecting improvement in her psychiatric condition. Then really? I can't believe it. I just want to see the interviewer. It's like, well, welcome to the job. You're the new clinics janitor Um, I'm not even gonna get to know your name. You people are never here long You know a couple of garbage trips that you uh, that you tend to run out the front door And after all this the remainder of her teeth were removed and she was sent home pronounced cured Oh That's I think it's a doctor. That's because they probably never saw him again. So you're just like perfect

Yeah, well because cotton he did claim an 85 success rate. Wow, uh, but you can claim whatever you want Yeah, that's the best part about just ripping people's teeth out The bellies and stuff like that because you could literally just be like, yeah, she's done And she's done get her out of here get her a snoco. She's been great And he asked how does this work in with death 45 percent of dr. Henry cotton's patients died following the procedures That's actually a low number out of thought. It would be quite higher. Yeah I mean, he's not as high as like say unit 731 or dr. Mangala, right? But as far as sanctioned in the united states in the 20th century pretty high. Yeah

Yeah, you don't want a 45 death rate. No, that's not good. No, no, no, that's not good odds It's not good. Not great. Not great. And either way, you're losing something. Oh, yeah, definitely Well, uh, let's move on uh in still in death by science. Let's move on to Radiation now, this is the story that made me want to do this whole podcast This is a this is a fucking rough ass story and it just shows, you know And again, no matter what your boss asks you to do while you're working at the nuclear power plant You're allowed to question it Totally

You're allowed to just think about yourself for a second just for a second. So yeah, what would Homer Simpson do, you know? So this is how this is what happened in the beginning credits of the simpsons It really is We're off and radioactive material all over yourself, but we'll see what happens So how radiation actually kills you is that unlike other toxins Um, our bodies don't detox radiation. We can't handle it. The damage is radiations radiation causes It remains once it has been inflicted or Once it has inflicted its damage

It continues to damage as it reduces the ability of healthy cells to Replicate and it changes healthy cells into free radicals that in turn damage more healthy cells That's what the Beatles did to good kids in the 60s It's true domino effect it starts turning. Yeah, it's start your entire body just starts turning against you It is I mean it is cancer plus. Let's call it that So the worst nuclear radiation accident in japan's history until fukushima, of course was at a uranium processing philly facility in takimura And it was not an actual nuclear power plant like three mile island or shernobyl or fukushima

It was a processing plant Which means that they were making the materials that were to go to the power plant eventually So they didn't get all the glitz and glamour of working at the actual nuclear power plant, right? Right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah It's it's still extremely dangerous more dangerous or less dangerous I'm not sure more dangerous because you're going to see what happened Why because they're doing it like they're making jam and grandma's fucking farm like this ridiculous their hand So basically they were told to hand mix these uranium solutions into a tank Which was against any sort of approved procedure

And what the way they said is that they they were doing the basically the guy that we're going to talk about hisashi ouchy His name is a rough name for what happened. Yeah Um, basically their jobs were to pour buckets of one solution into this gigantic tank of uranium And they did it seven times what they didn't realize what they were doing And it's basically they were doing it either too fast Or it was too something would happen and they weren't using the correct tank No, it sounds like they were using the exact same process someone at Duncan Donuts uses to fill up the ice coffee Yeah, yeah, and except it was like, yeah, ouchy woke up everyone. He's like, oh time to make the radiation

Instead of time to make the donuts, right, you know, but he was the guy who was literally holding the funnel Yeah, that the that the stuff was going towards he was up against the tank And so it's dropping all out of the funnel getting all over his hands What happened is is that the mixture went critical basically they were sitting and watching and they said a blue flash just went like And they're just like, oh no, isn't it firework? and then um They started feeling sick. They started feeling like immediately nauseous and disoriented Yeah, I mean they looked fine, but they were being what happened is that they had been bombarded by neutron beams

Which is the actually the most powerful form of radioactive energy. So these guys were Immediately fucked. They were microwaved. Yeah, they were microwaved essentially and they looked fine They started feeling sick immediately Hisashi's skin because the problem is he was right up against the thing He was right up against the thing. So the rest of them looked fine. They just they died literally a month later Yeah, hisashi His skin Was literally burnt off of his body just on the front half of them. He didn't get uh powers like powder did

He wasn't able to control electricity or anything like that. I mean, I imagine his first thing was like Do I become god zero in there? All right, or something. Is this cool? Is this good? Am I spending me? I also feel like he sounds a little bit like cartman So he was exposed to a radiation dose of about 20 sieverts and how many do you want? None, none zero zero zero zero zero zero Yeah, yeah, uh the mortality rate to put this in a perspective

I mean, I don't have time to go into what sieverts are. I know what they are Of course, I know what they are But I don't have time to go into it right now. Everybody knows that marcus. You talk about it all the time off of the air Yeah, it's all I talk about exactly. Yeah, it's my pet knowledge You don't have to tell me if I hear one more damn thing about these sieverts and all the information you know about them This is my pants. Oh god. We know all of the information you know already. It's a lot I know good lord So the mortality rate for patients exposed to levels exceeding eight sieverts is 100 percent

So there was he got 20 so he's like 90 million percent. So he just basically turned into soup Yeah, yeah, there's no way that this guy is surviving. He has a 100 percent mortality rate Uh, but they say how his body looked they say at first glance his body was bright red like he'd been sculpted with water That is kind of cool so far so good Yeah, is it is that cool? Yeah, it's a little bit cool like you want to be cherry red on the outside You want to look like a firebird? I don't think so if it didn't hurt like a whole bunch Yeah, it would be kind of awesome and then it would be like hey kids Is it dark in here not anymore because I'm full of light, you know

So no skin remained on his front side. It was it just had just Slothed off and you know how much I love an opportunity to say slothed off Yeah, well, they were like they were laughing because it was like it's like we could take his face and make it into a pizza Fripping in the air. Oh no, it's all prego That is kind of a funny thing to do Yeah, that's sad. That's sad. They're at the end there. Yeah, however his entire back side The skin was completely normal. It was only his front side that was so fucked up at first Hmm, however the intestines once they opened him up the attestas were swollen and they said that it looked like a writhing

Serpent yeah, yeah, so what is what do you mean? Is it was just shaking around moving? They were literally going like like seizing. Yeah, because his gastrointestines weren't functioning They were literally full of shit and seizing because he wasn't Doing well Right, right looking like the snake basically it destroyed it destroyed his his dna It rearranged it rearranged his chromosomes So if you're going to commit murder and you don't want your dna to be found at the scene just stand stand next to a nuclear thing

You can remember in his body it disappeared Um, which is it means his eyeballs his nose inside of his nose. Um, he was all fucked up Was he alive? Yes, well, this is the thing is they thought he was dead when he when they when the first happened They thought that he was a well his brain is fried. He's gone. Right. It was seven days in Apparently he was like laying there and then finally opened his eyes and he was like I am not your guinea pig Please let me die

And it's they were because they were like basically keeping him alive looking at his organs and shit But he was totally conscious. Yeah, and then he was hanging around laughing And he said they would laugh at joke and they would do all this stuff. Meanwhile, he's sitting there like the picture of him he looks like Uh, he looks like david cross from the mr. Show sketch with the when he jumps into the vada acid to commit suicide Like straight i'm real put it on the facebook page. Yeah. Yeah, it's a pretty he looks like kim chi and not in the delicious kind No, he's a little he's a little cooked a little overcooked. He's a sausage man Yeah, to be sure and keeping it alive

They kept him alive for way longer that was even close to be an ethical on the 59th day He died and they resuscitated him Oh, yeah, that's amazing every time they bring him back three times every time he popped every time they brought him back to life He died and they brought him back to life and he died because basically the government Was using this to learn what happens when you get 20 cverts of radiations. Yeah, like any government medical Um test it always just ends with the report being like really sucked for him. Yeah They hated it 20 tell you what, you know He never went cool. You know, I think we for some point

We thought maybe he turned into some sort of like cool werewolf like a teen wolf Like he would become like the Hulk or like the thing or something But in the end he just turned into human soup. So yeah, I even sewed some hair onto him Just thinking maybe that would like start a growth thing Nothing put a fun wig on him and I put some fake teeth like chatter teeth in there because I thought that would be funny But instead it was terrifying. I mean Ghoulish, I would say it's a little funny though Uh, here's the strange thing about it though

The only one of his internal organs that did not you know atrophy and turn in on itself and eventually Uh, you know fall apart his heart And look at that You know, it's just like it's just like my football coach said the the strongest muscle of the body body really is the heart It really is yeah, you can take 20 seabirds of nuclear energy and everything will fall apart except for the The only organ that keeps you alive The only one that you wish would stop working Yeah, yeah, he died for his entire body was destroyed from the inside out and it was a slow painful

And unpreventable death. That's sort of what Henry's doing to himself But I'm doing it with with booze and cigarettes. Yeah And a bit of an interlude uh and go back to execution for a little bit of course There were many people that were responsible Uh for these people's death and many people that were responsible for keeping this man alive And so what is the punishment in japan for a businessman or anyone in a high position of power when they fucked up? No pee that day They don't get peed on harry carry

The the announcer went and uh I discussed a a baseball game, you know, it's a baseball game Okay, okay same with yourself the way you do or he are you just you are a shame upon the family and your ancestors And they are If harry carry shames you that would cut deep that really might make that might stop your heart Harry carry is the only man who could do it Maybe I okay, I'll pronounce it differently. Howdy. Howdy. Howdy. Howdy. Howdy. I see so what happens with howdy. Howdy It's a ritualistic suicide. Usually it took place in a temple

The victim would strip to the waist and plunge a short rager as a rager Razor-edge sword in the left side of his stomach and then pulled the blade forward horizontally Then he took the blade out and when he pulled the blade upwards a duly appointed official known as the kai shaku Stepped forward and decapitated the dude one observer said Complete silence followed broken only by the hideous noise of blood gushing out of the inert keep before us Which but a moment before had been a brave and chivalrous man This was one of the fellas who harry card himself. No, this is one of the fellas who witnessed a harry cutty. Ooh Yeah, yeah, it did come out and it didn't sound like abo when the blood was coming out of him. That's weird

Now let's get into I mean speaking of sack or speaking of suicides. Let's talk about a Dumb death. Okay, and a particularly brutal. Let's say a sacrificial type death This took place at yellowstone national park now yellowstone national park Found in abundance there hot springs everywhere and these bubbling cauldrons of steam and boiling water They measure in temperature about 150 degrees fahrenheit and a lot of them are in the 185 to 205 Degree fahrenheit range. Will they give you a uh, will your skin fall off? Your skin will fall off. Your skin will fall off So there have been 19 scalding deaths recorded in connection with yellowstone's hot springs since 1870 but on july 20th 1981 24 year old david alan kierwan from

La canada california was driving through yellowstone's fountain paint pot thermal area with his friend ronald ratliff And ratless dog moosey moosey the dog just kind of accidentally fell in the springs and that's how they died This guy was just being too nice Moosey the dog moosey the dog. I don't like it from la canada california. Yeah, I don't like moosey the dog It's the wrong animal It's not a moosey. It's a dog. This is my dog kitten Isn't that funny? It's not fucking funny. My life's empty. My wife died. That's right. We named the dog kitten

It's worse than naming your dog gary, you know, I hate real names on dogs or yeah when it's not a dog naming it moosey. Yeah So at about 1 p.m The two park the truck to get out and take a closer look at the hot spring Moosey escaped from the truck and ran towards the nearby celestine pool, which is a temperature that is measured at Over 200 degrees fahrenheit fahrenheit and jumped in. Oh I don't want to do to break the mood here, but I do want to say I mean, I guess that's Gonna be one hot dog You

You are too much son of a bitch That's the saddest thing we've heard all day poor moosey. I'm sorry for making fun of your name moosey I didn't realize that you were past So kerwin and ratliff rushed over to the pool to aid the terrified dog as it was yelping and trying to get out And kirwan his attitude indicated that he was about to go into the spring after it and according to bystanders Several people tried to warn him by yelling at him do not jump in right and he shouted Like hell, I won't and took to just the only way that sentence can be said In an impenetrable southern accent. Yeah, you can't like hell. I won't

Like hell. I won't you ain't stopping me. I'm gonna go in there. I'm gonna say my dog. I named it dumb lassie So he took two steps into the pool and then dove headfirst into the boiling spring He swam out to the dog and tried to take it back to shore. He then disappeared under water Let go of the dog and tried to climb out of the pool Ratliff helped pull kirwan out of the hot spring resulting in second degree burns to his own feet And another visitor led kirwan to the sidewalk as kirwan reportedly muttered That was stupid How bad am I that was that was a stupid thing I did and that is a direct quote from that man

Well, maybe he was just trying to get a kiss from his friend ratliff like that boy did in the movie sandlot from that beautiful Yeah, kirwan came out of it blind and when another park visitor tried to remove one of his shoes His skin which was already sloughing off came off with it He sustained third degree burns to a hundred percent of his body Including his head and died the following morning at assault lake city hospital. Hey, all right. There you go Oh, at least he died. I know that's the live for 60 days like that. Like ouchy was exactly poor poor ouchy That's how disturbing this episode is that was actually top 11 of the deaths we've talked about so far

Maybe at least ouchy's name wasn't like boo boo. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. I want to kiss the boo boo Yeah, it's on my lips stuff came off on my lips. Oh, it's his lips They're on my lips. Uh, it's weird. Why am I nauseous? Oh just being around him. Yeah, all right So we talk quite a bit about serial killers here on the show But we don't really get a chance to get to the people who just do one murder That's really really really beautiful brutal Brutal the other b-word

Yeah, the other b-word what's wrong with your brain nothing the third b-word the third b-word b Brutal brutal murder is brutal. Never beautiful. Brutal. Okay. This next couple sections like we've done before these are kind of like tap out sections This is gonna be some more of the this is probably Some of the more extreme things we've covered on this show are these next two stories. These are bad ones. Yeah Yeah, um, and it's rough out there for people. We're bad humans are bad. Yeah, and they gotta go No So you're just you're you're asking for mass genocide. I'm just saying humans are not doing well. We're not good Well, I will say we're doing fairly well because these stories are outlier stories. These aren't normal. Oh, no, of course not

Both stories that happened in the 90s. Oh Well, maybe it wasn't normal for the 90s Weird decade. I mean tgif was on the air. How could everyone be so mad? Well, that was even oracle. That's why they were so thankful. It was friday because monday through thursday murdering everyone just murdering each other Torturing. Yeah, but you're right when it was time to sit down and suck down some Pizza hut pizza and uh in some coca-cola and watch Family matters the world was a piece. All right. So now this is the story of kelly and baits. Oh, um, this is this is this is pretty This is pretty rough. Yeah, this was in england in uh in 1996 going back a few years in 1993

Uh a man with the last name of smith now this guy was a real piece of shit Yeah, um, I believe is i forget his name. It's like samuel smith. Yes, something like that He is he is this disgusting dude who has basically had a history of beating women Who was this fucking 30 year old guy who only slept with 12 to 15 year old girls? But not in like the molesty way like it is now it was like in the old school like, you know Jerry lee louis marrying his cousin kind of way Yeah, like matthew mcconnell. Hey kind of uh kind of way there in um On reality bites the name of that show. Oh, they keep the same age. He's uh days and confused days and confused

Yeah, yeah, yeah, he was kind of like a yes. He was kind of like that character But real so that made him a uh an abuser and a molester right right Uh, so he started a relationship in 1993 with a girl named kelly baits when she was 14 years old About two late two years later. She left school and baits moved in with smith at his home in fernival road in gorton In gorton. No one's ever been like my life is getting better. I'm moving to gorton Moving on up in gorton. I'm moving. I'm literally was living in a bucket for a long time So i'm just happy to have this urinal house. Yeah, I love living in the porter potty So, uh, of course, uh kelly had concealed the relationship from her parents

Uh, they didn't know what was going on and she'd essentially just ran away and left But on april 17th 1996 smith showed up at a police station and told them that he'd accidentally killed his girlfriend During an argument in the bath And he claimed that she had inhaled bat what bath water and he tried to save her but unfortunately she died Now when police went back to their address They found chorus baits naked and dead in the bedroom Mm-hmm and her blood was found in every single room in the house and the post mortem examination revealed that she had over 150 separate injuries on her body during the last month of her life

She had been kept bound in the house sometimes tied by her hair to radiators or chain or chairs Other times she was tied with a ligature around her neck. Let's go through this laundry list of injuries. Yeah This is a bad laundry list. You know what I mean? Like if you were going to the store with this list Turn around and go back home because you need a nap Yeah, that's an insane thing to go to a store wanting to buy Uh, uh, there was scalding to her buttocks and left leg Uh burns on her thigh caused by the application of a hot iron a fractured arm Multiple stab wounds caused by knives forks and scissors stab wounds inside her mouth

Crush injuries to both hands mutilation of her ears nose eyebrows mouth lips and genitalia Wounds caused by a shovel and pruning shears both her eyes were gouged out And then later stab wounds were found in her empty eye sockets and she had been partially scalped Now like what? I mean, this isn't like a burnt dinner argument. Can we just say that when he went to the police station He's not good at improv Because and none of those things indicate drowning They did she did actually die by drowning strangely enough He was telling the truth about that right? Yeah, you know, it's it's people are psychopaths

And this is the problem is that again you can see this in terms like he didn't he didn't have the traditional thing of being a serial killer Um, but that this is obviously a person that was going to do a crime like this eventually And it probably he had been building to this crime much like serial killers do the pathologist determined that her eyes have been removed Not less than five days and not more than three weeks before her death So it's possible that she had been living without eyes for three weeks before she actually died people I feel like you know People are always saying oh the heart like we were discussing earlier It's the most important thing about the but I think the heart's a little bit of a dick

As soon as I feel like as soon as you lose both eyes the heart should just be like oh, I'm out. Yeah I'm done. Let's go. Let's go. Yeah, let's quit the heart is sort of like a mentally disabled person It's always full speed and it's always like i'm going until I stop I'm going until I need done until I need to eat You know, yeah, oh man. Yep. Smith. Uh, he denied the murder. He claimed that Bates quote would put me through hell winding me up Uh, and he also claimed that Bates had taunted him about his dead mother and had a bad habit of hurting herself to make it look worse On me and when he asked to explain why he had blinded stabbed and battered Bates He said that she had dared him to do it challenging him to do her harm

Let's let's be fair. He was double dog dared. I was gonna say this would have to be a triple dog dare. Oh, yeah uh, and of course after the trial uh the The evidence the the photos that were shown and the testimony that was given it was so bad That every single member of the jury was given complimentary therapy bar. Yeah, absolutely So this was this was one of the worst things I had read and told the next story I actually think that jury should have looked resembled an airplane with the barf bag and the oxygen thing just in case You know, you just pull it down Yep, and the last one that we're gonna cover this last story

I literally could barely get through because when I was reading it last night Uh Because of how horrific it is. Yeah, so just just know that and for our younger Lady listeners and of course the even the older ones if you're with a fellow who's a dickhead leave him Yes, just like honestly you You don't deserve any sort of abuse either verbal emotional or physical if you have ever experienced any sort of abuse whatsoever get out Because it's only gonna get worse. Yeah, and make them buy you dinner every now and again

Good god these guys out there and not wanting to buy dinner anymore. A bunch of shrunks Well the last person that we're gonna talk about the last death that this is definitely by far the worst death that we've ever The worst and the most prolonged death that we've ever covered. Yeah a girl named junco feruto Excuse me junco feruta She was known in japan or her case was known in japan as the Concrete encased high school girl murder case. That's a lot. That's a long name and in japanese I bet it sounds a lot better. Sure. Yeah, it's probably much shorter. That is of course the japanese to english translation So on november 25th 1988 she left school and was walking home

And as she was walking home, she was kidnapped by a group of young men Including a 17 year old who was identified as yo and would be later be given the surname Kamisaku and they kept her captive in the house owned by the parents of kamisaku in tokyo And for the next they have a they kind of have a fucked up view of women in these countries sometimes So it's like they talk about it in japan and training where they have to like be on separate Parts of the train together. Yeah, it's it's it's very uh, it's very intense the general relations They're sexual fetishes and what they want to do to women can only be best described by animation That's how insane it is. They they don't even have human porn. That doesn't get them off. It's weird

It's very it's very strange, but they still blur the ding-dongs and the vaginas on there There's nothing that grosses me out harder about asian porn than the fact that they blur out the faces and the dicks It makes me it makes my skin grow. It's just like they're both dead It really does So this girl she didn't know her abductors at all And as far as you know, everyone knows she had absolutely no connection with him. She was just randomly taken off the street Uh, and of course once they kidnapped her the kidnappers made the girl call her mother and tell her that she had run away from home But she was with a friend and wasn't in danger

and he also Convinced her to pose as one of the boy's girlfriends when the parents of the house where she was held were around But the parents knew something was up But they didn't say anything at all because they were terrified of their son and we discussed isis earlier That's the similar thing they have with like foley when they have to give their speeches and stuff She was in that she she did it to stay alive. Yeah Uh, well what began on november 22nd 1988 lasted for 44 days. This is The worst torture that we will ever talk about. I don't know if anything is going to top this

No, this is it's really bad. It's everything that happened to her It's like it's a it's a culmination of every single crime that every serial killer has ever done Yeah, all right. Just go through the list real quick day one day one November 22nd 1988 Eight fed cockroaches to eat and urine to drink forced a masturbate Burned with cigarette lighters and had fireworks set off in her ears mouth and vagina Foreign objects inserted into into her vagina and anus including a still lit light bulb Day 11 december 1st 1988

Severely beat up countless times Her face was held against a concrete ground and jumped on her hands were tied to the ceiling and her body was used as a Punching bag until her internal organs were damaged which made blood run from her mouth Dumbbells were dropped onto her stomach. She vomited when she tried to drink water as her stomach couldn't accept it She tried to escape but was punished by cigarette burnings on her arms flammable liquid was poured on her feet and legs and then lit on fire A bottle was inserted into her anus day 20 december 10th 1988 She was unable to walk properly due to severe leg burns She was beat with bamboo sticks fireworks were inserted into her anus and lip

Hands were smashed by weights and her fingernails were cracked. She was beaten with a golf club Cigarettes were inserted into her vagina and she was forced to drink her own urine as they all laughed at her and that's not funny. No She was beaten with iron rods repeatedly Uh, it was winter time and she was forced to sleep outside in the balcony skewers of grilled chicken Were inserted into into her vagina and anus causing bleeding. Uh, she almost escaped On this day, but one of the boys caught her just in time as she was trying to call for help They punished her by taunting her with a candle flame and then finally dousing her legs in lighter fluid and set her on fire as punishment She went into convulsions and the boys would later say that they thought she was faking a seizure

So they set her on fire again and put it out Day 30, how did she live? This is my question. It's like what it's our body It shows how resilient and and powerful the human body is that you can live if you have the will to do it You can't it's it's insane Day 30 hot wax was dripped onto her face. Her eyelids were burned by a cigarette lighter She was stabbed with sewing needles in her chest Her left nipple was cut off and destroyed with pliers a hot light bulb was inserted into her vagina She had heavy heavy bleeding from her vagina due to the insertion of scissors

And her injuries were so severe that it took her over an hour to crawl downstairs and use the bathroom And her eardrums were severely damaged Uh, and then finally day 44 at the very end of it on january for fourth 1989 the four boys beat her mutilated body with an iron barbell Uh, using a loss at the game of a ma of mahjong as a pretext Uh, she was bleeding from her mouth and nose and they put a candle flame to her face and eyes And then lighter fluid was poured onto her legs arms face and stomach and then she was lit on fire The final torture lasted for two hours and junco furuta

Finally died later that day All right, that's very intense not bad parents and we'll say that Definitely one and then less than 24 hours later on january 5th 1988 the killers hit junco's body in a 55 gallon drum Filled it with concrete and then disposed of the drum and a tract of reclaimed land in kyoto Right, and what was the punishment for the kids? Uh, what now 17 was the youngest age or was the average age roughly 17 roughly 16 70 These are all teenagers Okay, the boys were arrested and tried as adults

But because of the japanese handling of crimes committed by juveniles their identities were concealed by the court Uh for his participation in the crime one participants served eight years in a juvenile prison Jesus christ He was released in august of 1999 the leader received a 20 year sentence Uh, and which is the second do we know the names of these guys? Uh, apparently a um a magazine released their names saying that you know I mean of this because you're in japan if you're uh in japan listening. I know we have quite a few japan listeners uh, jeb uh

Check out the names of these people and uh Find figure out a way to punish them go get them Yeah, it was the same way but kind of like what happened with is see a sagawa The the cannibal that came out of japan was served where it's like they have very weird Their their legal systems very weird. Yeah of what they let people get away with It's I mean because what are you gonna do because it's the problem is there? I don't think they because they don't work on like case-by-case examples It's like all of the everything is decided sort of like how it's always been decided especially

I don't know. This is I literally couldn't read this. Yeah, be the woman didn't help her out one bit You know, it's a sexist society in a lot of ways, especially in 1988 yeah, uh And the other two guys that were involved in this one of them got a five to nine year term And the other one got a seven year term their people serving 25 to life for stealing a Snickers bar three times here in California, you know, oh, yeah, yeah and selling weed and shit like that. Yeah, it's this is it's horrible story Oh, and by the way, I also I also forgot to mention that she was raped over 400 times right well That's kind of in there go to the cave comedy radio.com and buy some shirts

I don't know how else to get out of this cave comedy radio.com slash podcast on the left You can go there if you give a 25 dollar donation here in the united states for 40 40 dollars International we can send you a fucking awesome Goddamn What I will say is this is getting october. We're just this is literally october first october first week You're not even getting this. We're just dipping our toe in this is it man. This is fucking it's n times, man I'm gonna say we dipped our knee in I think we went up to the knee today I you know by you know three more episodes of this and we would be we'll be in overheads. I'm sure

No doubt about that. Yeah. Oh, and we're gonna be speaking about the rest of the month We're gonna be doing our yearly listener pasta episodes and we've already been getting a ton of emails in From all of you people, but we also want to do just like we did last year We want to have some of you guys calling on skype and we can listen to your scary stories Uh and put them on the air. So if you've got a pitch for us if you've got something a story that you want to tell And you think that you can come on here and spin us a hell of a yarn Then email us at cave comedy radio at gmail.com. Yes, we're trying to get that over the next two weeks So as fast as you can get them in get them in get them in and also

This episode it's really hard to plug a to z I don't think you got a I think mbc is doing enough work plugging your show Hey, Henry, I saw your face in a fucking taxi cab yesterday. I think they're plugging y'all I was watching a sunday night football last night or sunday night football this Last sunday and henry's all over the commercials. Yeah Out of the four scenes that they show they showed to and sunday night football major radians. So a lot of people Said who the hell is that fat guy? This past sunday. Yeah, I don't think I don't think anyone who made it through the

concrete high school girl murder Is going to be watching a to z Thursdays on abc NBC, excuse me mbc You know, yeah, be good to yourselves and be good to other people and yeah And don't forget this sunday on october 5th is the cave comedy radio sausage fest. Yep It's going to be one hell of a time It's a stand-up starting at 5 p.m. Going until 10 p.m Live podcast starting at 6 p.m. Going until 10 p.m

Stand-ups upstairs podcast downstairs and then finally at the very end of it the cowmen Which features uh hold mcnealy from the round table of gentlemen and myself going to be playing an hour long set downstairs And again people have been already getting their shirts. Yeah, I love those selfies. They look beautiful. So attractive Beautiful. Oh, yeah post pictures of yourself. I love seeing people wearing these t-shirts. No, it's it's such a it's been a great It's really I love those shirts and I'm so uh, so happy that people enjoy them. I'm humbled. Yes I'd say I'm actually humbled by seeing our fans wear these shirts You guys are the fucking best every uh october 12 through the 17th I'm gonna be doing an hour show of some kind up here at the creek uh as well

So for that week, so come on to one of those shows. It'll be a lot of fun. Um, all right. We'll do a hail satan Hail satan. We're doing satan's work this month. This is our time. We're welcoming him to earth Do you know what you see do something satanic for people every day? Like if you see someone who's looks frown blow some wheat smoke in their face Right, you mean you see someone who needs a smile. Just go over there and tell me like hey, you know what? I'll touch your dick Well, don't you don't have to say I'll touch your dick, you know And of course howl gain I'll gain and I do think if satan wasn't coming back tonight

He probably went back to hell because uh of this podcast. He was like, I don't know what they're doing on earth But I think hell is a nicer place to be Um, and of course hail yourselves everyone Help me and my ghost relations