Last Podcast On The Left - Episode 169: The Betty and Barney Hill Abduction Part I - Concentric Circles

Episode Date: April 8, 2015

It's one of the first and possibly the most credible of all alien abductions this week with part one of the Betty and Barney Hill story.

There's no place to escape to. This is the last talk. On the left. That's when the cannibalism started. What was that? Um, but that sounds fun, though, man, you gotta explore the city. I walk for hours. Do you go into any buildings that you pass by?

I see. I have a window shop, and I stare at people, and I'll pick one person to follow when I follow them. But I'll tell you what, I'm tasteful. It's never a woman. Good. That's correct. It's always a man.

Um, should we start the show, Marcus? Yes, we should. Are we starting a show? We're starting the show, so I'm Ben Kissel. That's Marcus Parks. Welcome to the show. We are starting now. How are you doing?

I'm just, I'm just sitting in Toronto. I got a little rhyme about Toronto, which is, which has really been helping me. All right, you got to drink some wine till you feel fine. Drink some scotch till you're the boss. Yeah, but you could make that rhyme in any city. That's not a rhyme that's, you know, definitely needed just for Toronto. It's been helping me here in the hotel, and I also wrote it in lipstick on the walls right around my bed and around the bathroom.

So but you know that like cleaning ladies go into your, you know, into your hotel room like once every other day or so. So, you know, people do under, see what you're doing in there. I toss dollar bills. I don't keep their fucking mouth shut. Also, the thing is here too is that everything got coins that are actually worth money. So it's like $2 coins. And so I'll just toss a good like $12 for the coins at her just to hear the changle in

on the ground. Oh, I love it. You're throwing hard objects at maids. That's what I'm doing. Yes. That's my new hobby. Hollywood Henry Zabrowski was a bit of a kook, but Toronto Henry Zabrowski, I think he's a borderline felon.

I literally accidentally gave a homeless man $6. Can you ask, can you ask for a back when you do that? I'm new here. I didn't realize. I watched the coins leave my hand into his hand and I was like, I just go on. Cool. All right. Good.

I can't, give it back. Give it back. And then his reaction was just far too ecstatic for what you thought the situation was. He did like a prospector like, woo, God, jeez, popped up and clicked his fucking heels and then and then he died in a pool and of his own vomit right in front of me. Oh, that's not a bad way to go. All right. Today's topic is amazing.

Betty and Barney Hill. Now this abduction case is the first up. It's actually the first abduction case recorded up until this point. People have been seeing like flying saucers and weird little men rocking around. We covered it when I was like talking about Jacques Valet and his book dimensions about how in the 40s and 50s, people have been seeing like weird little, basically what they, what they considered to be tiny Italian men. Yeah.

They feel in their fruit because that's what Italians do. The craziest thing is the UFOs would go overhead and everybody's toilets became unplugged. So I mean, that's the Italian UFO haunting. Absolutely. And so I've been alone in a hotel room for about a week, thoroughly researching this case. Okay. Again, you can just get outside.

There's a door. You can open it. Just step right out there, Henry. Go out there, but no one wants to hear about Betty and Barney Hill out on the streets of Toronto and don't think I haven't tried talking to somebody. But this case is incredible. You have two reliable witnesses. It's the first time they use regression hypnosis, which we know is dubious.

It's among the most dubious of all psychiatric practices. Okay. If not the most dubious. So it's extremely trustworthy. But the thing is, is that if you read the book, I read the book Interrupted Journey, which is what basically was one of the first books about this topic written. It was written by John G. Fuller, we basically worked with Benjamin Simon, who was the hypnotherapist for Betty and Barney Hill.

And they really do a pretty good job of covering up their tracks because what you can discover is when they were doing the regression hypnosis, they weren't trying to prove the existence of aliens. They were trying to basically calm down Betty and Barney Hill because they were fucking hysterical because they got raped. Well possibly. All right. Well, let's figure out who these heels are.

Let's go to the early 60s. Oh yeah. It's 1961. Yeah. Girls got see-through shirts on and again, bush hair, seven inches long and I love it. So 1961, Barney Hill himself was a 39 year old black man who worked for the U.S. Postal Service. That is what's interesting too, is that this is an interracial couple, which was also very

controversial and I will also say is used somehow described with even the, I don't know the type of taste used in the Interrupted Journey, but it was all just being like, and this improbable couple, like that's all they would like talk about. And the way you say black market is still, it's a little bit something the way you say it. Black man? Oh, that's better. That was better.

It was actually illegal in many states. Well, I mean, I was, well, that's what I was leading up to is that he was a black man. She was a white woman, 41 years old. Interracial marriage was still illegal in many states across the United States in 1961. Betty owned a master's degree. She was the supervisor for the Child Welfare Department. So these are very credible witnesses. These are not Backwood's trailer par kill billies.

These are very well respected people in their community. Absolutely. And Betty was a civil rights fighter during the 40s in college. Like she would, there was a story of her basically befriending the only black girl in her college. Barney Hill wanted to be an engineer and was told early on that there was not a job, there was not a field that hired black people. So he became a postal worker. But you have these two people with a lot of degrees who basically couldn't get ahead

in life and are basically hiding out in New Hampshire because it's one of, at this point, like one of the most liberal parts of the country. Yeah, some people, some people say when they're trying to debunk the story that they, their psychosis was caused by the stress of being in an interracial marriage. But both Betty and Barney Hill say that they didn't really have any problems. Their friends were very accepting, their community was very accepting. There's also a thing called black semen fever. I've heard that, I think I've got it myself.

Yeah, and it's very, you see discs everywhere, but the thing is, is that it makes you dance real great. Oh, absolutely. That's why I could use some. I love the idea also, yeah, you can have sex with your girlfriend, you can have sex with your husband and your wife, but really when it becomes like, get over here, let's make some civil rights, let's do it, let's baby, come play civil rights worker with me. And that's how you get a blow job and it's perfect.

It gives things so much more weight and cause, you're not just having dirty, disgusting sex, you're saving the union. The thing that was always weird to me though is how every author like described Barney Hill as a snappy dresser, was it like, if you see all the pictures of him, he just looks like a guy from the fifties. Yeah. The old kept saying he's like a real snazzy guy and it's just like, I mean, I didn't see him in a wide brim hat with a fucking feather sticking out of it, you know what I mean?

And furthermore, if you want to test Barney Hill's credibility, he was later played by James Earl Jones in the TV movie, The UFO Incident. That's all that you need. By the way, one of the most racist moments in Hollywood was that James Earl Jones was not actually the man who was behind the mask in Darth Vader. As he played Darth Vader, he just voiced Darth Vader. Well, no, he was because James Earl Jones was a short fat man. It's the future.

Why can't Luke have a black dad? Well, I did find weird about James Earl Jones in the movie is that he is actually painted white, which I didn't really appreciate. They went to Johnny Depp Tonto route. But that movie, I watched about 20 minutes of that movie and it's very weird. Yeah. The UFO Incident is very fucking weird because it starts with James Earl Jones and some undissernable white woman and he's just like, I can't believe you let me come to drive through

New Hampshire, but Betty. And it's like his voice is not what a normal person sounds like. No, it's a beautiful voice. So let's get to the actual abduction itself. So in September 1961, Barney had developed a little bit of an ulcer. So him and his wife decided to take a little trip over to Canada. Yeah. Yeah.

My hometown. Yeah. They went to Niagara Falls. They went to Montreal and on the 19th of that month, they started going back to Portsmouth, New Hampshire where they lived. It was a clear night. A crescent moon hung in the sky. It was very heavily wooded.

It was a very secluded road. There weren't a whole lot of people there. So it was the busiest. It seemed the moon sagged like a big white tit. Well, you can put a nipple on anything. I would at this point. So they were about to. Good.

Do it. I'm telling you, dude, you get that flashlight, but everyone says, no, no, no, I can't have a silicone monster in my hotel room. Thank you, Marcus. That's so great that you wanted to make Henry's situation sadder. We're trying to get him out of his hotel room and your advice is bring in a fake pussy. Well, what I've been doing is that if I'm, if I'm, I'm going to get one and I'll be in the hotel and if there's someone who comes in and wants to do room service, I'll like

open the door crack and then use the pussy lips and be like, come back in two hours please. Okay. That'd be great. Yeah. Pamela, the pussy lips. It's going great in here. You can do it.

Okay. So at about a quarter past 10, three miles south of Lancaster, Betty saw in the sky what she first thought was a falling star, but the falling star paused in the sky and then started inching its way back upwards next to the moon. Now what they said is really interesting. The way they described the movement of it was that it was like a fly, like looking for a landing spot. So it was kind of hopping around in the sky and at first a Barney was like, that's a satellite.

So just don't even look at it, Betty, for the love of God, Betty. And you know, like the 1961 satellite, it runs on diesel and it's clunky and stupid looking. Yeah. So south of twin, uh, south of twin mountain, uh, Betty and Barney, they stopped at a roadside picnic area so they could walk their dog, Delzee. Yeah. They had a, they had a Dotson, the cutest couple ever in the names.

Which one's the dog? If you had, if you were to Delzee, Barney or Betty, which is the dog? It's tough to tell. I would have said Barney. Well, he's presidential. Yeah. I had a buddy who had a dog named Barney, he was the cutest little beagle. It's a great name for a dog.

Oh yeah. Good name for a man. Racist. Oh, come on. So this, while they stopped, this gave Betty the opportunity to look at the object through binoculars. Barney worried about bears, went to the trunk of his car and grabbed his gun. So Betty, Betty, we need to get back in this car because you know what they say about being

a black man at night time with a bunch of bears, they will elect you president of being the bears. And I don't have time to be president of the bears because the male will, it keeps going on. It does. It never stops. So Betty, she's watching it through the binoculars. She sees the craft travel across the face of the moon, flashing multicolored lights.

By the time she handed over the binoculars to Barney, the object had changed course and then started rapidly descending in their direction. So they real fucking fast, got back to their car, they started driving. Well Barney during this time period, so when he kept saying, he kept saying he called it a piper cup, right? He says like that's a piper cup, which is basically, it's a sea plane. And he had this thought in his head of the military's flying planes around and is buzzing us.

They saw us and they want to like come mess with us. And that's a bad thing. I can't believe the government's doing this to us. Yeah, well military, whenever the military tries to pull a joke, it tends to be just really super scary and then you feel like you're about to die. And they think 9-11 was going to be hilarious. Oh my God, that was, yeah, that was huge. That was their Andy Kaufman moment.

But what I find interesting about all of this stuff here, so what he watches is basically this light in the sky draws their attention. And like what we talked about with Jacques Fillet and the idea of aliens and their nature to reality, right? That maybe they're not physical ships. It's not like a thing in the sky that it's literally, it's sort of like a thought mechanism that is part of Betty and Barney Hill's mind at the same time, right? So it feels like they're being watched by this thing and they're getting intentions

from this thing because it's basically out there just for them to see it. But nobody else can see it, you don't think? No, because we'll find out later on that there was a blip on a radar that night in the weather station, like near there, there was like an up at a mountain. They basically saw a radar aberration. But this is a UFO is a psychic phenomena. This also comes from a solid 106 hours of reading about aliens and sitting alone in a room.

Again, the door, there's a door and there's a handle. You just turn that handle. You're in the world, Henry. You can go read about aliens in a bar. Oh my God. I did do that. Yeah. Okay, good.

Good. And who approached you? No one. Good, good. So, you know, Toronto is a lot like New York. That's good to know. So they're driving down the road in the car and this big craft actually blocks their way in the road.

It starts descending towards them and it's huge. It's about 80 to 100 feet above the vehicle. Barney stops the car and grabs his binoculars for a closer look and he says that rapidly in an arc like movement, it shifted from its location directly ahead and rested above the treetops in an adjacent field. Barney put his handgun in his pocket and walked towards it. He said the craft was about 60 to 80 feet in diameter and as he approached it, he said that two red lights at the end of fin-like structures parted from the sides of the craft

and tilted towards Barney. He said he lifted up the binoculars and he said inside, he saw a group of figures that were quote, somehow not human, moving about with the precision of German officers. This is very interesting because up until this point, Betty and Barney had been viciously arguing because the whole thing that she kept seeing in the sky and she was like, I want to, I want to, let's stop, let's go look at it and she was really fascinated and what they kept saying about Betty Hill is that she was an unflappable woman, that she was like a very calm, almost quite boring.

Right, unflappable is the code word for extremely boring. Extremely boring and so she was getting really excited and saying like, I think that's a UFO and Barney was like, no, no, that's not a UFO. To Barney's credit, he is a black man married to a white woman who's 39, so it's not only 1961, he's seen some pretty terrible things happen to people of his race and certainly people of his race who marry white women, usually flashing lights, you don't run towards them. You just try to, you try to get back as quickly as possible.

We've got to deal with space races. But it looks like the world's biggest police officer. I know, I know, and these police officers, what is this, that's some kind of hose oil. So and they seem German, I love that, that's how famous the Germans are for just like moving really rigid, but like they look like Germans, it's almost, they almost look good when they move. Yeah. Oh, the Germans are aliens.

Aliens who move like Germans. Yeah. It's like they invented the robot, but it was like a robot that killed six million Jews. You remember Ben. So so Barney and Betty had been arguing and arguing and arguing. And so finally, he, when the things started approaching the car, he pulled over the car to this like rest spot. And basically what he found himself was compelled to grab his binoculars.

And the whole time he was just like, Betty, all right, we will do this once and we will go and we will, we will settle this once and for all. Right. And when he walked out and he said, the way it moved was that it was like a, the windows never stopped facing him, it arc down and sloped down so the windows were looking at him like it was a bunch of eyes. And then he saw all the occupants inside of it. Basically a dude sitting at a desk and a bunch of guys behind him and they're all working

like robots, except when they see him. And one thing he said here is that one turnaround and smiled at him, but in with their, their slit mouth. So it kind of looked like somebody with like Botox or something like that. It was just like, right. Like very like that doctor who killed himself because he was made fun of on the unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. Incredible.

Yeah. It's an incredible story, but it's very interesting. So basically then we'll talk about this further, but they had sort of a psychic relationship him and the captain of the ship who sort of pulled him out of the car. Yeah. Yeah. And Barney said that he had this feeling like he, of course, the craft started to tilt towards him and he said that he had this feeling that something bad was about to happen.

So he had to, he absolutely had, he had to tear the binoculars from his face because he couldn't move and started racing back to the car. And the great thing about the Betty and Barney Hill case is that all of their regressive hypnotherapy, all of it was recorded. So we have so much footage of Betty and Barney Hill talking about their experiences. And we've got some footage we're going to play right now that is Barney talking about this experience. Sort of like one of the first podcasts.

I don't like that. Like in America, door кр пуууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууууу Control so that he cannot tell I am scared. God, I'm scared. It's all right. You can go right on. Experience it. If it might hurt you now. I got to get my gun.

All right, that's all right. You can go. That's so intense. It's really intense. intense. It's always important also when you're about to record somebody make sure you put the audio advice right in front of a box fan. You know, that's like perfect. That's exactly what you want to do. But in the description of him, we're going to get deeper into the hypnotic regression of it in the second episode, but he, what you're saying is that when he cut to him while he was recounting first seeing the leader's face,

he burst into tears and started screaming and convulsing and would, can we talk about his eyes? Eventually, you're going to hear the term. He keeps going. His eyes, his eyes were inside of me. He's circling his hands in the air. Like he's kind of like, I don't know, twisting, twisting some big things. Yeah, he's doing the chubby chuck. He's twisting the night away. That's what he's doing. Yeah, very scary shit. This shit kept me up for a couple of nights. Yeah, the sentence. And it wasn't just boozing and staring. No, again, there's a door. Open it. Just go outside, Henry.

But the idea of his eyes were inside of me is the most disturbing image I could possibly think of. Oh, yeah. So Barney, he gets back into the car. He is hauling ass down the highway. And they said that as they were driving, they were in silence. They weren't saying anything. Nothing was communicated between them. And they say the craft park directly overhead, they were keeping pace. And they said that they heard this rhythmic buzzing noise. The way they put it down, I heard one recording of it, and it was like a... And Betty was just like, God, I wish I had learned Morse code.

And it's like, what are you, your nerds? So the whole car started vibrating. And they said that they felt this tingling sensation passing through their bodies. Betty said that she touched the metal on the passenger door, expecting to feel some sort of electric shock. But she could only feel vibration. And they said that it's at this point that they started to feel an altered state of consciousness. And that their minds started to become dulled. They heard a second series of beeping and buzzing noises. And when they woke back up again, they found that they were 35 miles south and had lost two hours of time. Which is really kind of fun if you think about like, let's make good time.

You know, making good time is so important when you travel. This is the opposite. This is making bad time. This would make me mad because I was supposed to get back at... I was supposed to get back at fucking one o'clock so I could see some Matlock. But instead, now I gotta sit and watch the evening news. And of course they had... Thanks, aliens. Yeah, they didn't have Tevo back then. So if you missed it, you missed it. Yeah, you missed it. That's what they say.

So the only lost-time memories they had were a flying orb in the road that was silhouetted against a stand of trees. A sharp unplanned turn off the highway and a roadblock. But they didn't know where any of these things occurred. They were just flashes of memory. We've already seen in other alien abduction cases now that are... Because now this is... You gotta remember that this is the first time any of these types of details are ever being heard. Now they're considered very stereotypical of alien abduction scenarios. This is the first time anyone heard this.

So basically, aliens, when they mess with our psyches, right? They put sort of like images into our brain as like placeholders. Which is why people always talk about like seeing owls or seeing all this stuff instead of seeing the aliens or like seeing a doctor or when that dude... Remember the whole thing with aliens dressed up in a fucking zootsuit? Like showing up and like dancing in front of you, like the really high strangeness of it? Their memory, the only conscious thing they have was of a bunch of road workers on a road next to a downed car that looked like a giant glowing moon. Just sitting in the middle of the street. And they viewed it as if it was totally normal, as a normal memory.

Right, so do these aliens do improv everywhere? Is that what this is? So these are, so they fake the, whatever, their spacecraft, they fake that it's broken down. You're the, you know, the worker who's gonna go work on the car today, whatever clacks are, whatever your name is. And then they just fake it until the car goes by and then they speed up 20 feet ahead of it and put on another show. That's a suggestion from the audience. Roadblock will do. I have a, um, hello, um, Rulio, how is your packed lunch?

Well, they do take things very literally. They do, they do. So when the hills got home, they searched their car, they looked at the outside of their car where the noise was coming from. And they said that they found these shiny circles on their car's trunk. And when they put a compass over these circles, the needle would whirl around. And if it was moved to another part of the car, the needle dropped down. Now, this came from basically Betty, when they got back, Barney and Betty were both, Barney was immediately like, we are not telling anybody that we saw anything.

We're not doing anything. Yeah, it's already, it's like, we are the aliens as it is because I'm a black man and you're a white woman. So we can't fucking bring any more attention to ourselves. Well, you work so hard for credibility in your life and then all of a sudden you see an alien and you're just like, well, I'm ruined now. Yeah. This ruins everything that I've worked so hard for. Yeah, they were high-ranking members in the local NAACP chapter.

They worked on a lot of civil rights stuff. So they had everything to lose by telling people about this. They had everything to lose. So she called her sister because what you find out is that actually her sister had a history of seeing UFOs. And she had seen at least two. And so she knew her sister would believe her. So she called her and her sister, because again, it's a weird 1960s thing, was like, my neighbor is a physicist. You should ask my neighbor what he thinks.

And then he got on the phone because it's all, you know, it's all rotary phones. Right. So everything's a six-foot cord. And so he should show up. He calls and he was like, you should check all those spots you see in the back of your car with a compass and see what happens to it. And so Betty went out to check with a compass and she was like, Barney, look, it's spinning Barney, it's spinning. Uh-oh. And he's like, fucking, no, I won't do it.

And so he then begrudgingly goes over and takes the compass and he's just like, yeah, I guess it is spinning, darling, but well, this compass is broken. It's got to be broken. There were other odd things too. Their watches stopped and never ran again. The leather strap on Barney's binoculars had been completely severed. They also had certain odd behavior. Betty insisted that all of the luggage that they had taken on the trip with them be kept near the back door rather than the main part of the house because she was worried about radiation. That she thought that all of this luggage had to be contaminated so we can't bring it inside.

There were other weird things too. Her favorite dress that she'd been wearing, which was in great shape on the morning of September 19th. When she got home, there was a two inch tear at the top of her zipper. The lining was torn from waist to hemline and the hem was torn all the way down one side. And later when she, I mean, when she examined it further. Because another piece of odd behavior is that she took that dress and immediately put it in a bag and hid it in the back of her closet where she didn't want to look at it at all until she pulled it back out and saw this shit. These aliens have to see what kind of clothes the people they're about to abduct are wearing, send somebody to coals, pick up a similar looking outfit so at least they don't have to have ruined tattered clothes after the unbelievable invasion of their body. Maxard, do you have a Mary Claire credit card?

I do, I definitely do, but unfortunately it's maxed out. Is there petty cash? Gotta get that petty cash. The really weird thing about the dress is that there was a strange pink powder that had degraded the fabric. The longer that it was there, the more the fabric just turned into a rag. It got analyzed by five different laboratories and not a single one could come up with any explanation for what it was. Also Barney's shoes, they were his best dress shoes. They were scraped at all on the top.

On the top which is like he was being drugged and his toes were hitting the concrete. And if you see pictures of the shoes, they were truly fucked up. The top of the shoes looked like they had fucking claw marks at the very top of it, like he had been dragged for a while. And there's no way that you can just do that on accident. Even Michael Jackson, the best dancer of all time, he danced on the bottom of his feet. Even the moonwalk, it was all on the bottom, nothing on top. We all see the thing too, which is really strange is that when he got back to the house, he had an instinctive feeling that I need to check out my groin. My dick, my dick parts.

Something's wrong with my junk. And you're going to find out that over the next two years, a concentric circle of, a perfect circle of warts grew above his cock and balls. I wonder if that was discussed in the naming of the band, A Perfect Circle, and that was one of the like the third, a perfect circle of warts. And we're going to go so close, just cut off the off warts part. So now we're going to hear from a couple. Do you want to introduce these people, Henry? Kathleen Martin, Stanton. Kathleen Martin and Stanton Friedman.

Okay, so Kathleen Martin is Betty Hill's niece. And so she is the child of the woman that Betty Hill called when it first happened. And she's a terrible public speaker. And who she's also with, this is an hour and 45 minute long video we're about to play a selection from. There's a man named, a physicist named Dr. Stanton Friedman, who wrote, he was the one who discovered the Majestic 12 documents, or the quote unquote Majestic 12 documents. And it's come forward as being like the rational UFO guy. Also, an insufferable fat bodied nerd who is, it took me three days just to watch this, this presentation. It is a, it is a slideshow.

You, you watched it, Marcus. I didn't. He's full time. He's just like, now we went up to New Hampshire to film a movie. I won't be plugging my movie. Well, Henry, I hear that he stayed for a week in a hotel room in Toronto and never left. So be careful. Good, good, good, good.

Mark's really going to fucking permanently affect my personality. Yes. He is a door. This guy is a real fucking, he just laughs, it's just got that thing. It's that laugh inappropriately thing. Great. That really just makes my skin crawl. Marcus, can you explain the Majestic 12 in like a sentence?

You go ahead, Henry. You'll know that better. Just further run me away from love. I know your Majestic 12 is a, Majestic 12 is a part of the, what is possibly a secret group of covert covert like alien investigation group that was like formed by like Prescott Bush. And the idea is that they were outside of the government and they were the ones that started basically everything that Project Blue Book was doing would funnel to them. And they were the overseers of all beginnings of alien research and Staten Friedman believes that he found the only existing documents that had like basically the words Majestic 12 written on them. But the weird thing was is that when he handed them into the university, they were all stained with Baja sauce. I didn't know that.

Yeah. The only way I could describe his appearance as far as his face goes, kindly Jewish landlord. Oh, okay. Very good. Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird.

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Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird.

Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird.

Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird.

Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. feel a cup-like device being placed over his groin

in that exact location. Those growths became infected, inflamed, when Barney was undergoing hypnosis with Dr. Simon, and he had to have them surgically removed at that time. This is two years after the event, mind you. But the growths appeared shortly there after the event, OK? But the inflammation was later. Yes, two years later.

Hour and 45 minutes ago. Wow, I love it. And it's just them going over a PowerPoint presentation. It is an incredibly in-depth, if you want to waste your life like we do, watch it, because you get a full breakdown of the whole case. Right, right, right. So he didn't take care of his warts.

They became inflamed and infected two years later. And that was a part of the people, like part of the weird backlash against the hills was that when that information came out, there were people being like, that's just general warts and that pervert black. Yeah, he was immediately branded a pervert who was riddled with STDs.

Right, right, right, right. I mean, you know, if Barney did cheat on Betty and he had to make up some story, he nailed it, you know? A fake and alien abduction. She'll never know that I blew her friend Pam. The truth is stranger than fiction. You always got to go to. Yeah, that would be an explanation on par with John Ramsey

while killing his daughter during a sex game gone wrong, saying it was actually an intruder. Pretty convoluted. A lot about it. I still think it's suicide. Now that I look back at the whole thing, I think John Benet just got sick of the whole thing. I'm kind of with you on it.

Sick of the whole pageant life. If it was suicide, she made the right choice. So both of them slept until the next afternoon. And then Betty, of course, as Henry said, called her sister Janet. And Janet told her to call P's Air Force base. Janet, I think I saw an alien. Oh, Betty, that's wonderful.

You saw an alien? Barney's just hitting his head fucking between his knees. I'm going to get murdered. What's the timeline right now from actually the abduction happening and where were we at now? Is this like 24 hours or so? Yeah, about 24 hours. Yeah, it's the next afternoon.

So they did the compass thing and all that fairly quickly after the event. Well, yeah, they did the compass thing later on. Like they got home at like 5 AM, something like that. And they slept until the afternoon. And then when Betty woke up, she called her sister. That's when the whole compass thing came into play. And then after that, she called up P's Air Force base

and spoke to this guy named Major Paul W. Henderson. And that's when he says, yes, something showed up on our radar last night. And this is pretty much the last time period where the government was actually taking these things pretty seriously. She went through several different channels because there was a thing called NICAP, which

is basically a section of Project Blue Book. And they came and they recorded everything. And there was a full report. And they just said, you know, they were like, Betty seemed like a credible witness. And Barney, well, he was black. Well, Barney didn't say jack shit. He was completely against calling the Air Force base.

He was completely against anybody coming and talking to him. So yeah, Barney was very much against this entire thing. But Betty, she said that Major Henderson was very interested in the structure of the UFO itself. Well, especially when they talked about the fins coming out on either side, because that was really finally like them could be like, oh, it's some kind of plane.

Because everything else, they kept hearing about saucers at this point. And they had basically said that that basically discredited everybody. Yeah. But Henderson's final report said that the Hills had probably misidentified the planet Jupiter.

Really? The planet Jupiter often comes down and harasses you on the streets of New Hampshire. I've heard of doing that before. I'm telling you, I've been sitting here looking out that window. And if Jupiter fucking tries me one more time. Don't look at him, Jupiter. I'm going to set fire to a mall.

OK. Tell me, Jupiter. Jupiter's telling me I'm not good enough. Jupiter's leaving you alone. Oh, I just got a message. It loves you, Henry. Don't set fire to a mall. However, even though it did say that they misidentified

the planet Jupiter, officially, there was an additional item. And that is where he confirmed that there was a radar observation at 2.15 AM, which was around the time that things were going haywire for Betty and Barney Hill. And in the 60s, there weren't nearly as many planes in the skies there as nowadays. So you would really pick up on something if you randomly saw a blip on your radar.

That's the most exciting thing that happened to that person who looks at that radar all month. And it's really kind of unexciting, because it's a little blip. Yeah, a little tiny blip. They don't have very good stories. There's no doubt about that. This one time I saw a cloud look like a turkey leg.

OK. This other time I saw a cloud. It looked like an ice cream cone. Oh, OK. But what I guess you could say is that an ice cream cone shaped cloud and a turkey leg shaped cloud are pretty much the same shape. Similar shapes, yeah.

I had a jar of peanuts for lunch. That's actually a great lunch. I've never had a friend. OK. So about a week later, Betty's at the public library reading up on UFOs, because she ain't letting it go. She's become fascinated with it. Yeah.

And she loves it. That's another cool detail about the abduction scenario is that when it was happening, one thing that they ended up recollecting is that Barney looked and saw Betty when she'd come back from the abduction scenario, which you'll see, and she was just smiling and laughing, just going like, would you believe this? Can you believe this is happening?

He's just like, she thought it was great. Yeah, but Barney, after they got back on the road, after the two hour gap, Barney saw a light ahead of them. And the only thing he screamed was, oh, no, not again. It's like that movie, Dirty Work, where Norma Donald's tripping on the brownies that were giving me the devil. But that was interesting.

You mentioned she has to go to the library. It really does form your entire life after you admit that you've seen aliens and stuff like that. You have to do all this publicly. So now you're the creepy Betty girl who is constantly in the library researching all the odd books that no one wants to look at. I've got to tell you, it probably

would have been a little bit easier on America if she was a little bit easier on the eyes. You know what I'm saying? So she's reading this book. And she looks like a nutcracker with a wig on. Oh, come on. Who doesn't love a good nutcracker? So she finds the name of this guy, Major Donald Kehoe.

And she types up a letter and sends it off. As Henry mentioned earlier, I mentioned NiCAP. He was the head of NiCAP. So she said that Barney observed these figures dressed in black, shiny uniforms. Nazis. Hey, look at Nazis. They moved like an image that kept

coming back to Barney Hill specifically. So he kept seeing the term Nazi in term of the leader. Because the way he described the leader was in a shiny black jacket with a scarf and a black motorcycle cap on, which is, I mean, very fashionable. And with one thing we know about the Nazis, they looked great. They did.

But what was the moustache like on this Mr. Alien leader? Was it a fool? Or was it a, I don't even know what Hitler's moustache is called. The Hitler moustache. Yeah, it was just the Hitler moustache. That's all, he took it. Yeah, he took it.

It used to be called a Liff and Whiffer. Oh, the whole Liff and Whiffer. Yeah, it meant dust pan, dust pan brush, back in the day. So a few days after she wrote the letter, she started to have these dreams. And there were a series of five of them, and they were absolutely terrifying. And she had a dream journal.

Every day when she woke up, she would jot down all of the details. And the dreams, there was no sequential storyline to them. One dream did not follow the other, but after she had all of them written down, she was able to rearrange them into an order that made sense. This happened, then this happened, then this happened, then this happened.

It's like when you make a movie, then you splice it together later on. Yeah. You can't necessarily film all the sequences in a row. Yeah, exactly. You can go ahead and make a movie now, Ben. You film school expert. Oh my god.

Thank you. I watched by NYU yesterday. So the dreams are the first glimpse into the lost time. What happens? We're going to see this a lot in abduction scenarios again later on, where basically the brain, the conscious memory, has refused the memory to come forward, right? So when you're unconscious, it's easier to recall,

which you're going to see also when they start doing hypnosis. Their dreams are going to come more and more vivid. Yeah. So in one dream, the roadblock that we mentioned earlier, the roadblock comes into play. She said they came upon a roadblock. These dudes surrounded their car, and Betty and Barney completely lost consciousness.

And that's when she realized that she was being forced by two tiny little guys to walk into the forest. And Barney was walking behind her. And she said when she turned back and called to him, he seemed like he was in some sort of trance, just sleepwalking, just shuffling his feet, and was completely unresponsive. And this is also called a Greek date.

Yes, it's very, very fun. Being a tiny, hairy man taking a half-sleeping woman out to a forest. But this is where he possibly scuffs the top of his shoes. Possibly, because he's just shuffling his feet. We'll see that later on, too. So she said the guys were about somewhere between five feet and five feet four.

They all had matching blue uniforms. They all kind of looked like military cadets. They were almost human. And we also, we've seen that a lot of times in alien abduction scenarios, is that you see these aliens as that they're trying really hard to look human, but they just can't quite get it right. But that's because a lot of times

as you're looking at aliens, again, if we're going to view aliens as a psychic phenomena, they're taking it from our collective memories and our unconsciousness and the idea of how to basically mask themselves so that we can understand them so that we can be more pliable to their demands. But instead, this time, they showed up as black-haired, dark-eyed with big Jimmy Duranty noses

and bluish lips. I don't think they understand how to sell it. No, they got the time all wrong, yeah. No, they should be looking all like Kate Upton's. Big, wiggly, beautiful hourglass figures. They're just going like, dude, Mr. Barney, don't you go and get on my Hexymnation table. And I just, I'll be jumping in there.

You see me running up the ramp. And then you have an evolution of a relationship take place in two hours. We were by the end of it, you're screaming to get away from her. You know, it's not just the aliens projecting us, projecting something that we can understand into our brains.

That's also something that the human consciousness does. Yes, we make things look human. Yeah, well, we make things look human. We want patterns. But when we see something that our brains can't comprehend, that we have no frame of reference for, then we fill in the blanks. Right, which is why they make, that's

what we're like, Osimo and a lot of the new humanoid robot types are making. Their faces are very unique, but their blank surfaces pretty much. Yeah, and that's what you're saying. What is it called? It's called the Uncanny Valley. Yes, and so you also look at it.

So again, if we want to get into the nature of fucking reality, if you want to come into my hotel room here for a second, that if there are gaps in our understanding and gaps in how we basically take the information, basically we're seeing grays. And what we're doing, our brain, is to desperately save our sanity. We're making them look as human as possible in our memories.

And somewhere between that is us manipulating reality, which is possibly what their whole deal is, is what aliens are supposed to do, or come here and make us question reality, because it's a part of the universal consciousness. It's the same thing. It's the same thing that alley cats do when they get together, put on a trench coat and a top hat,

and they go to a fine hotel and rent a room. We just pretend we know it's a bunch of cats, but we're just like, go on. And they seduce a gold-hearted prostitute. And then she finds out there's a bunch of cats, and then she leaves them just being like, I can't believe you lied to me. And then she comes back and she's like, actually,

I do love you whatsoever. And then all those cats have sex with all our holes. I remember that. So we're still in the dream right now. Betty says that Betty and Barney and the little guys that are leading them along, they walk up a ramp. This is a very common. This becomes, of course, very stereotypical later on.

They walk up into a ramp. They walk up a ramp into the saucer-shaped craft, very metallic. Once they get inside, the aliens separate Barney and Betty. Of course, she starts protesting a little bit, but a man that she called the leader said that if they were examined together, it's just going to take a really long time.

But you're an alien who got here from space. Can't you just figure it out? No. OK. No. No. No, they cannot. They also said specifically, we're

going to see later on in her regression about how there's only so much equipment in each room. Yeah. And so that's all they got. So Barney and Betty take into separate rooms. Betty sees a new guy in the examining rooms, very similar to the others. Because all these guys looked pretty much alike.

They all had the bluish lips. They all had the gray skin. They were all very short. But she called this new man the examiner said he was a lot more pleasant, a lot more calm than the leader. She said that although both the leader and the examiner spoke to her in English, she said

that the examiner was much worse than the leader. That the examiner, his speech was broken. She couldn't really understand much of what she was saying. So the men, she said that they had accents. Like what kind of accents? I don't know. She said they were like vaguely European. So like everything that I do.

Yeah. Pretty much. Yeah. And it was just that they were like, calm, don't even worry. Don't look over there. It's just they're aliens. They're just trying.

They're having fun. They're biologics. Clacks are being fun. Aliens, they're biological, right? They're just like biological beings. Well. Are they psychic entities, Ben? Well, that's what I'm just saying.

Where does the chicken and the egg separate between psychic reality and physical reality? Maybe we're all just a projection, man. Right. I mean, maybe it's a perfect, an amalgamation. Amalgamation. Amalgamation. Of all the English dialects.

Maybe they just heard what English was from all of the English dialect speakers. And that's what they came up with, as like perfect, perfect American accent. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's actually pretty good altogether. So Betty said that the examiner told her that they were just going to do a couple of experiments

to see what the difference was between humans and aliens. Just a real quick go over. Aliens drive like this, and humans drive like that. So we sat her down in a chair, showing a real bright light on her, and cut off a lock of her hair. She said that he examined her eyes, ears, mouth, teeth, throat, and hands, trimmed her fingernails, saved those, examined her legs and feet, and then

sucked on her feet for a long time. Yeah, and according to the aggression, it was just him just being like, one more second, let me just, the pinky toe. No, no, no, no, no, no. She's just like, I like that. I wish Bernie do that. Bernie.

You could learn something from him. You know when he makes your penis fall off? He clipped off her fingernails, and she's like, what do you want those for? And he's like, that's just for me. It's for my collection. So after he examined her legs and feet, he used a dull knife that she said

looked a lot like a letter opener and scraped some of her skin onto what looked like cellophane. I just thought of cinnamon toast man from powder toast man. Yeah, powder toast man. Powder toast man. She then said that he tested her nervous system and just jammed this huge needle into her navel. And she said it hurt like hell.

But the leader just waved his hand in front of her eyes and the pain went away. Henry. Yeah, that's pretty cool. Henry, do you want to play the hypnotic regression from the navel this episode or the next one? Let's do next episode. All right, cool.

Sounds good. So the examiner leaves the room. The leader comes back in. And she said that the leader picked up a book. They've had a lot of strange symbols and a bunch of rows. And the leader said that she could take it back home with her. Of course, she didn't take it back home with her. She left without the book.

Yeah, she also asked where the alien was from. And he pulled down this instructional map that was dotted with stars. We'll get into the map later on. Yeah, yeah, because this is a part of war for regression. She just remembers bits and pieces of this. But this is one of the key evidence to show us that mean, well, if you really want to get into it,

that it could actually be real. But it was also, again, it's about the nature of reality, of how they try to make us think about the universe. And if you are an alien and you are listening to this episode, I'm sure that you are. If an American does or anybody asks you where you're from, say Cleveland. Cleveland.

Always Cleveland. So Betty, as she was leaving, she said, no matter what you do to me, one day, I'm going to remember all of this. And she gets back into the car. Barney's there waiting for her. The leader said, all right, you should probably wait until we leave.

But then he asked her, well, you're all sitting in the regression, he's just like, OK, all right. Because that's literally how he behaves with her. She'd be like, huh, you're funny, you're funny, OK. Well, do you want to watch us leave? And she's just like, you bet I do, Clarkson. So he's just like, OK, so she watched it. And he said, basically, you watch it.

This is more the regression thing, too, where the ship just kind of flipped like a ball and then glue started glowing and then zipped up into the sky. So Barney, while Betty was having these dreams, he was working nights and he was never at home while any of these dreams transpired. So she started talking to him about the dreams.

And he said, it's only dreams, fucking drop it. Stop talking about aliens. Barney wanted to put this entire thing behind him. And it is important to note that Barney refused to read her dream accounts, refused to listen to him. But he did overhear Betty talking to a guy about part of the dream at one point.

Because one of the really big things that people use to say that there are hypnotherapy was actually effective and that it was actually true is that it was done at different times. It was done in different places. And they hadn't really discussed any of this stuff beforehand because Barney just did not want to hear. He refused to.

And the other thing, too, is a thing we did forget is that during when they were dazed, when they came back after the abduction the first time, Barney actually had the idea of like, hey, why don't we just, OK, you want to tell me it's happened. OK, let's both write and draw a picture of what we saw and then show it to each other. And they both drew the same exact cigar-shaped craft

with lights on the side of it and the two red fins on either side of it. And that will also serve as evidence that they both saw something. Yeah, I mean, and it's got to be tough being Barney. He's working for the United States Postal Service. Barney's in a lot of pressure. Long nights.

And the next thing you know, you've got to go back to your wife every single morning with the alien talk. Never a fun breakfast. Maybe it helped their sex life, though. Well, I don't think so, because I'm a pound, I'm a pound at you, if I want you. Yeah.

Pimp, pimp, pimp, pimp, pimp. Yeah, don't work around the perfect circle of warts, honey. When you're trying to blow me, it'll be difficult. Oh, yeah. So that's part one of Betty and Barney Hill. Now, this is definitely the more informational side. And next week, we're getting into some of the deeper parts of probably because of the nature

of this incident, there's a lot of details. It's a lot of fun. Absolutely. Betty and Barney Hill, I didn't know there was so much to this story. There's so much more to the story because we've got to get into the hypnotherapy. We've got to get into the reaction, the worldwide reaction

to this. And we've got to get into one of the most important parts and possibly the smoking gun, the actual star map that was shown to Betty or supposedly shown, allegedly shown to Betty while aboard the spacecraft. And then it's all going to conclude with Barney getting his US Postal Service badge for 150 days, worked straight. He never missed a day.

Never missed a day. Never missed a day. Died of a stroke at a young age. So you want to have a vacation. So you're also showing an alien's odd fascination with the distinctly human phenomena of jungle fever. OK, Jesus, what's wrong with you? It's not OK anymore, Henry.

Oh, it's not. No, they decided it was bad. Oh, OK, I truly did not know. I was talking to you and Jackie. There's just so many things that you don't know about racial slurs. It's a surprise. This is a Browsky block.

There was a black guy who told me that I had it because I was talking to a black ale, and I was just like, we're in Brooklyn. There's no jungle. I want to say thank you to a listener who sent us something really nice. This guy, Jesse Rooney, sent us some homemade keychains, some last podcast on the left keychains

that he mailed out to us. He included a really nice letter along with it. And he also made me the coolest possible housewarming gift. He made me this nice little placard that said, home sweet home on it, but home sweet home was written on three separate pieces of human ribs. So that's a legal item. But that's OK.

Now, you can legally get human ribs. OK. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All you got to do is find a skeleton. They're all over the place. You can't make a skeleton, but you can find a skeleton. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So thank you, Jesse.

It's hanging in my apartment right now. Yeah, I very much appreciate it. Unbelievable. Thank you so much. Yeah, and speaking of fans, you guys are fucking great. Go to join the Facebook page. Follow us on Twitter at LP on the left. Follow Henry loves you.

Ben at Ben Kissle. Me at Marcus Parks. Go to iTunes. And be sure, if you haven't subscribed to Last Podcast on the left, go to iTunes and subscribe, rate and review. These things really help us out a lot. If you want your Last Podcast on the left t-shirt,

go to cavecomedyradio.com slash Last Podcast on the left, $25 domestic, $40 international. And Heil Gehn, everyone. Yeah, well, let's do a hail yourselves. Hail Satan, my sweet prince. And hail me, you know, send me some poutine, man. Send it in the mail. You want to send?

You want to be sent poutine? Poutine? Poutine, ooh-hoo. It's a sloppy good time, my friend. It's french fries and gravy. Oh, perfect. That sounds awesome. And let's all do a magustalations.

Magustalations all the way up to fucking Tau said, come pick me up, aliens. They're never going to. No, no, no. Man, I know. Man. For more shows like the one you just listened to, go to CaveComedyRadio.com.