Last Podcast On The Left - Episode 170: Betty and Barney Hill Part II - Don't Think I Can't Take It

Episode Date: April 16, 2015

We wrap up the Betty and Barney Hill abduction with the terrifying hypnotherapy sessions, semen sucking suction cups, and Captain Swett's Book of Poetry.

There's no place to escape to. This is the last talk. On the left. That's when the cannibalism started. What was that? I can hear it as loud as a Jews bell. Well, that's not appropriate. Jews don't even use bells. I don't know what Jews use. Well, the Irish use the bell. What Irish use a bell? I don't know. They put them on their little loafers. You've lost your mind. All right, all right. Irish don't use bells because they gotta fucking sneak their way to the liquor cabinet when their mother's fall asleep.

That's perfect. All right, welcome to Shriver One. That's Marcus Parks. I'm Ben Kissel. With us is always all the way from Toronto, Canada. Collaxar, do you notice when we pull the semen from the black man that it is whiter than normal? Is it because of the black skin and then the white semen? How dare you be racist? How dare you? I'm Bonnie Hill. My semen is white as any other man on this planet. Why does it Chinese? Why does it a Native American? Actually, you know what? Now that I look at it, it's pretty white. That's good. That's healthy. It's better than a yellowy sort of, you know, stucco type color.

There's just so much of it. What do we do with this amount of it, Collaxar? I don't know. I say we put on what these humans call a birthday cake. Ooh, that sounds excited. Betty and Barty Hill, we're on episode part two. It's very exciting. Where are we right now in this story, Marcus? Well, right now, we're at November 23, 1962. We're just a couple of months after the event. They're still very disturbed by it. So they go and attend a meeting at their church where the insider... Because you can imagine this too. So Betty and Barty Hill have both been like,

they've been trying not to talk about this, but Betty just won't shut her ever-lovin' mouth about it. And Barney is up to his fuckin' eyeballs with this kind of sure story telling. Because when it comes down to it, sometimes things that happen within a couple should be private. Right, right. But this is a pretty fun event if you do get abducted by an alien with you and with your... You know how girls always are like, let's solidify our relationship by telling all of our friends about it. But in this situation, the thing that sort of made the relationship bond involved an alien encounter. Yeah, if only there was a Facebook button that could share that. Yes, because just like today, Betty and Barney were both raped in a UFO.

In a UFO, you said. In a UFO. And before they started doing their hypnotherapy, basically... So NiCAP at this time, so we had already said that they had written a letter to NiCAP and basically told them flat out, we saw this UFO, they were very interested when they found out that they had two fins coming on either side of the craft. So they took it very seriously. So they sent two investigators and one little thing I wanted to talk about before they went to the hypnotherapy section of their story is that these investigators showed up and what's really kind of fun is that this was like old school, 1960s like, you know,

black frame, like scientists with slick back hair who were like, we must address the alien problem. Because it's like they were like really serious about it. Yeah, back when scientists really took care of themselves, they would put goop in their hair, nice gels and things like that, they all looked like rockabilly stars. And scientists smell like guys that play bongos for jam bands. Oh, they're disgusting and there's too much skin on their face. You've got to get rid of the dead follicles. Pull it back. Just a little bit back.

Yep. So when they showed up to basically question them about the UFO experience, a couple of questions they asked were really interesting. Like one was, did you have any nitrates in the car? Which is a thing that I guess, apparently in the 1950s up into the 1960s, beginning UFO sightings happened around like either, often times like large natural sources of like nitrates and also like factories and shit like that that had nitrates in them. Nitrates.

Which is very interesting. Nitrates use a lot in fertilizers. So it's like what's poisoning our youth and why they all have like Alzheimer's at the age of like 11? That's horrible. It's also what makes hot dogs pink. Ooh, I love a good pink hot dog. And basically it turns out that, I mean, the one thing that Barney Hill did is they had a, they did have a sack of fertilizer in their trunk.

Which is, you know, I always go on vacation with a big bag of shit. Right, right. You got to. And he also said there was nitrate in the gun that he had because he had a fucking gun with him for some reason. I think just to make Betty like wet. And another thing that they asked them when they sat down with them was, was why did you go on the trip? Which is very interesting because he came, Barney came back with the answer of like, what was really weird is that it was incredibly impulsive. He was like, this is how impulsive it was.

The only money we had was in our pockets. Saturday the banks were closed so we couldn't even cash a check. I think the amount between the two of us was less than $70. So the questions they asked were interesting. And then because we never thought of along those lines, they provoked a lot of thought in both of us. Mentioned in the remote possibilities of life existing on planets evolved with Alpha Centauri or Tau Ceti. Which is where the conversation got particularly nerdy. Which was news to me. That's the point in the date normally for me when she leaves.

When she glosses over. Yeah, right. So this was the greatest date ever. They had $70 in 1962 currency. That's quite a bit of cash. What are you saying, 300 bucks? Something like that. But on the other hand, it's 300 bucks to go to Niagara Falls and back.

And Toronto. Yeah. All right. Fine. And so it's really interesting here. So he finishes this. The questions were so far out that I just couldn't see what relationship they had to our experience. Those business of nitrates.

At that time, I had all kinds of plants in the house. In fact, in the living room, I had an avocado tree that touched the ceiling. They walked around, took my plants over, asked me what kind of fertilizer used them and things like this. Hmm. It's just kind of fun. Yeah. It's kind of amazing. He had an avocado tree.

That's incredible. Quite a lot of maintenance. Yeah. A lot of maintenance. Good guacamole. So on November 23, 1962, the Hills go to a meeting at their church where the invited guest speaker, a one captain, Ben H. Sweat. I'm going to make you sweat.

Yeah. Stand up at the church and just lift it up. He's just like, you know, I just guys, I just, I feel like I want to praise Jesus. And they're like amen, amen. Before Richard. I just want everybody to know that's like saying his name. I have to droop tops. The only way I can do that is by getting this dick.

Well, he had recently published a book of his poetry. Hmm. So he read selections from his poetry book at church, Unitarian Church, by the way. Okay. And the pastor then asked him to discuss his personal interest in hypnosis, which the Hills were very interested in because somebody had suggested to them that, you know, okay, you've got all this missing time. You're really, you've got a lot of stress, a lot of anxiety.

Maybe you should look into hypnosis. So Betty Hill saw this as someone of a serendipitous event. So after the meeting broke up, she witnessed. Especially when he, after reading about 15 poems about planes. Yeah. What is Captain Sweat's book of poetry all about? What is the man disgusting in these wonderful works? Blue.

Planes are red. Planes can often be your bed if you're sleeping in one. Right. Planes. If it crashes, you're dead. It's brilliant stuff. Are they all lightly applauded? Yes.

I love Captain Sweat's book of poetry. So after the meeting broke up, the Hills privately approached Captain Sweat, told him what they could remember about the abduction. And he was very particularly interested in the missing time. So the Hills asked Sweat if he would hypnotize them to recover their memories. But Sweat said, well, I'm just an amateur hypnotist. Because the problem is that normally the way he would hypnotize someone was doing those like body waves, like when you make your belly, like, ooh, yeah.

I do. Yeah. I can picture sort of a Billy Blanks looking individual here. Really buff. He should have just read him. He should have just read him some of his poetry. That would have done a good job. Oh, yeah.

Captain Sweat's going to hypnotize you when I'm pounding that clit with my mouth penis. My mouth penis. I love that. Your two front teeth. So it's quite a long time before they actually talk about this publicly and before they actually go for the hypnotherapy. It's between November of 1962 and March of 1963. March of 1963, they first publicly discussed the UFO encounter with a group at their Unitarian

Church because apparently, I mean, Unitarian, they're very open. They're down for all kind of walks of life. So I guess they figure those are the right people to talk to about it. I imagine that was like the only interesting service that happened the entire year. Oh, absolutely. Although Unitarian Churches, yeah, like Marcus was saying, they have a whole, they'll have Muslim speakers and Hindu speakers and things like that. And I don't agree with that.

I can't have the mixing. It's very confusing. So in 1963, Barney starts to develop a physically debilitating condition. His anxiety and the sorts of things that are, that sorts of anxiety and the sorts of repressed memories are starting to creep into his actual day to day life so much that he had to take a three month leave of absence from his job at the post office. This guy's a total fucking mess. He's got an ulcer pulsing through his body that he can't control.

The genital warts that he has are just pulsating with fire. Yeah. He sort of reminds me of the downfall of Bill Murray's hair in the movie Kingpin. It just gets crazier and crazier. So, yeah, he's got the STD and now he has anxiety and he is just riddled with a whole series of other problems. Yeah. Also, you imagine him delivering the mail right now.

It goes, God damn. You know, you go on and say, how big is it packaging? Didn't you turn it? Mail. My crotch. My groin. Mommy, why is the mailman scratching himself? He's a mailman.

That's what mailmen do. So, traditional medical treatment, all kinds of psychotherapy, they try all this stuff, all the traditional methods. There's no improvement as health. Barney, they remember Captain Sweat and so they request a referral from their psychiatrist to another psychiatrist who specialized in hypnotherapy. This guy, Dr. Benjamin Simon, his expertise was in deep trance hypnotist. And it is important to note that Dr. Simon had almost no knowledge whatsoever of UFO

phenomenon. The only really knowledge that he has, 1963, people are talking about it. It's in the newspapers. Roswell was kind of a thing. It's in pop culture without a doubt. There's stuff like outer limits on TV where they do alien stories and stuff like that. But this guy had no vested interest in it. According to the Interrupted Journey, he specifically said he wanted to disprove the

UFO side of it. He thought the whole thing was going to be just about anxiety and that the whole thing, that every image that Barney had came from Betty's dreams. Right. And space was very in vogue at this point as well because obviously with the space race going on with the Russians, people think that we get smarter through time. I would argue that people in the 50s and 60s had a much more of an explorer mode in their mind going on at all times.

They were looking at the sky and they wanted to get to that moon. Yeah, man. In the 50s, too, it's like right after the, basically, this is like the atomic age. Right. This is the time where America is at its height of optimism. People really have a can-do attitude. This is right before fucking things got really groovy. People were like, this is when the bras started getting loose.

Yeah. You know what I mean? Aw, man, that's the time to have been around. Yep. All the dogs in Russia were lining up to be the next astronaut. We do it now because it's easy. He's learning his second song on the guitar right now. Hanging out with an old blues man in prison.

So after the first... I forgot that with him. Aliens, man. That's the problem, man. That's got to be on that trip, man. I got to be on a galaxy trip. I heard these aliens got three pussies, man. Yeah.

Charlie, do you believe this story about the Hill family? You got to believe when the black is on the white that they see the gray. Well, good point, Charlie. Thank you. So after the first couple of interviews, Dr. Simon, his preliminary diagnosis was just anxiety syndrome. Cuckoo bananas. Cuckoo bananas.

I believe I'm going to put here that they are cuckoo. They are cuckoo. Cuckoo. Cuckoo for cuckoo puffs. So his next step, finding out exactly what those methods were. So the method of treatment that he used was regressive hypnosis, which meant that to get to the source of their problem, whatever it may have been, he had to go into a deep, deep, deep trance and to make these people.

Well, essentially what hypnosis is, what this type of hypnosis is, is you're trying to make people, you want to trick people into being hypnotized. Right. Like what Barney Hill said about the hypnotherapy sessions is that he said that he would be going into a trance and then he would come out and say like, hey, man, I told you, you weren't going to be able to hypnotize me. I was like, no, you've been under for two hours now. Right, right.

Well, I mean, you know, we were talking about the Unitarian Church. I went to an evangelical church and it's a very similar method they do when the priest or the pastor goes and touches people and they're supposed to fall over. I did that when I was 10 years old and I fell back because you're supposed to. And then I looked up a girl's skirt. That is great. Yeah, that's a true story. That is great.

So that was kind of fun. That's why that practice started. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I like how Barney even described the process. I thought it was really interesting the way he actually was hypnotized. Right. Dr. Simon began talking to me, telling me that I was relaxing. And he had me clasp my hands together and they would be very tight, tight, very tight.

But I couldn't open them no matter how hard I tried. I was standing there feeling very, very foolish because I thought of this is hypnosis. There's nothing to it. There's nothing to it. I'm just humor in the man. I don't want to hurt his feelings. I think he stopped and placed his hands over my eyes so that they would close. I said to myself that I wasn't really hypnotized.

When he told me that I couldn't pull my hands apart, I knew that all I had to do was open my fingers. And I could do it. But I just didn't feel like opening my fingers. I didn't even feel I was asleep. And then I was aware that I was waking me up and asking me how I felt. And I felt very, very good, very calm and comfortable. Like I had smoked a, like a Gandalf stick or something. A sweet, icky, sticky, some wowie-mowie.

You know? And I no longer then had any fear of hypnosis. So it was possible the doctor just drugged him like Bill Cosby drugged all of his victims. And it's very sad. I also feel I'm being good with the Barney voice. I think you're being great with the Barney voice. Very much so. Very tasteful.

Yeah. I have to say I'm proud of you, Henry. It's the most respectful voice you have so far. So that's really good. What am I supposed to do with it? Well, the important thing to remember about hypnosis is that what hypnosis is trying to get to is what that person believes to be the truth. Now whether that is the objective truth or not, this is the truth that Betty and Barney

Hill believe to be so. Right. And as we go into more of the psychic side of the alien phenomenon, we start to realize that is the only thing that matters. Like objective truth is going to be almost impossible to do unless we can get a gray in between like China's legs. You know what I mean? Like if we could get China up there to just sort of like pussy flex an alien out of a fucking

UFO and bring it to the fucking front lawn of the White House, then we'll be great. Are you talking about the pro wrestler ex pro wrestler China? Yes. I gave a porn award to her one day. I loved, I met her. Yeah. I was there. You were there.

That's where I got my flashlight. That's right. And you use it far too often. That glorious day. Oh, when is the anniversary of you and your flashlights? It just passed. It was in February. What did you get it?

Lube. Oh, that's well. It's really the only thing it needs once and yeah. Marcus, I'm hungry. When did you get me some of my favorite soup? And when you get that soup, how about you give it to me with my favorite spoon? Of course, it's Campbell's chicken noodle soup and served with your deck. So back to Dr. Simon.

Let's get back to Dr. Simon. So what he did at the end of every session is he induced amnesia for two reasons. One, to protect the hills from remembering the specific trauma of these memories. And two, more importantly, to prevent the hills from discussing these memories when they were outside of regressive hypnosis. So they wouldn't be able to collaborate their stories. And so one story wouldn't be tainted by the next. This process took about six months.

It was a very long process, hours and hours and hours of tapes. And he came upon the opinion that the hills probably had been abducted, or at the very least was the of the opinion that they believed that they had been abducted. Right, right. And this is all, what is hypnotherapy as far as what is the actual strategy being used? Is it just the power of, you know, just asking somebody to do something? It's sort of like what happens with aliens. It's sort of like what happens with animals.

Animals can go into trances all the time. Like you can basically, that's kind of what training a dog is. Or like when you do a thing, there's something with chickens where you put a blanket on a chicken. I don't think that's a blanket on it. Oh, come on. Well, you just want to make it cozy and tuck it in at night. Yeah, you can give any animal a pillow, it'll fall asleep. But you can do something with like pigs or something,

where you can like stick your finger in its ear or something and it gets all wacky wacky. But you can, a lot of animals have trance states. Yeah, okay. And we're just one of them. And the way you do it is essentially like meditation. Meditation is both a mental and a physical exercise. So you can induce a trance-like state, which is actually a physical state. And obviously Barney, he wanted to be hypnotized at the same time too, right?

He's like, you won't be able to hypnotize me, but he was in for the process. Yeah, yeah. That's what they say. Right, yeah, that's what they say. So let's get now, let's get to the missing time. Like this is what, this isn't, we went through the first episode, we went through what Betty Hill's dreams were. Now remember, his missing time started when, Barney's missing time started when he saw the eye,

the leader of the ship went back into it. The car ran away from the hovering craft and they drove and all of a sudden it was 35 miles later. We have the two beeping noises where they heard a beeping noises and then one set of beeping noises and then another set of beeping noises and all of a sudden they were two hours outside of their home. So he, Barney recalled driving the car away from the UFO. This is after the binocular strap broke. This is after he had looked at him, this is right before the missing time happened. And he said that he's driving down the road and he said he felt irresistibly compelled to pull off the road

and drive into the woods, which is consistent with Betty's dream of seeing the roadblock, of seeing, you know, being diverted off. Right. And we've got some footage of that and we're going to play. Oh, and by the way, this is from Kathleen Marden and Stanton Friedman. This is from their PowerPoint presentation. This is about an hour, eight minutes in, which I would say this is my fifth glass of scotch in. Right, right, right.

I said this documentary. All right, let's go. Then I thought, well, you know, are they in a car or in a car broke again or what are they doing there? And Barney of course had to stop and then he stopped the car. They started to come up to the car. They separated. They gave up the two groups. And when they started to do that, I got real scared.

The car, though, had died, the car stalled. Barney tried to stop the car. He tried to stop it. You know how a motor car would just turn over, turn over, it won't fly. He stopped the car. I stopped the car. It won't stop. I think, well, I can get away from the thing.

If I get the car door off, I can run in the woods and hide. And I'm thinking that I just put my hand on the car door and open it. And then they come up and they open it for me. And they open the car door and they say, that's not very big difference. And I'm glad to see that. Why do I put this hand out? I don't know if that happens. That sounds like a trip to the grocery store to you.

She had such a hard on about the fact that when Betty was talking about this during her hypnotic regression, they were like, oh, she didn't really experience it because she was talking about it like it was a trip to the grocery store. If I was with Betty, I just want to be like, so Betty, is the date going well? What's happening? I love the story. The way that she was contemplating and choosing her words so carefully reminded me of myself at a Taco Bell. It's very important what comes out of her mouth, and you really want people to get the point. Because you're also, you're bleary-eyed hammered.

Right. You are trying to sound Spanish a little bit. You're like, excuse me, I have a chulubah. I'm like, would I per chance fancy a gordita? And I got to tell you, I would fancy a gordita right now, you know what I'm talking about? And then I walk out with a bag, just full of hot sauce packets, and I'm like, I think it went well. So Barney, super anxious at this point. They're still outside of the car.

They haven't gone on to the actual UFO yet. Peter asked him to close his eyes, and when asked how the experience felt, like this is fucking terrifying, Barney said, I felt like the eyes pushing to my eyes. Oh, those eyes, they're in my brain. Those eyes, these eyes have seen a lot of love, but they're never going to see another love like I had with you. I know, here's also what's really interesting, because originally when they described these aliens, she said that they were, like we said before, gray skin, purple lips, large noses, right? Kind of like little Jimmy Duranties.

Exactly. But now, our younger audience will have no clue. Google Jimmy Duranty. You'll love him. Jimmy Duranty back when Damon was something special, when Eddie Damage wasn't done by a beautiful one with big tits. It used to be done by ugly guys. The Italians used to have power. Weird, anybody would give those meatball addicts any sort of power.

Oh, it's ridiculous. Crazy America, huh? So, the discrepancy, when she, in her dream, she saw this entity, but now when you, in the regression, you're going to see that they both are going to describe these creatures as bald-headed alien beings about five-foot tall with grayish skin, pear-shaped heads and slanting cat-like eyes, which is the very first mention ever of, like, basically of a description of a gray. But what's really interesting is I was reading another book called Revelations by Jacques Velet, my favorite French biologist.

This is a bit of a rabbit hole here that we're, we can't really, I'm only touching the surface of. All right, this is just the very beginning of my hotel existence. Right. Yeah, I know. That I got into this. Yeah. We got to get you back in a house. I do feel like that would be kind of a thing for you.

But my research is finally getting to its apex. Okay. There was supposed to be, in 1974, there was supposed to be a documentary made, with conjunction to Project Blue Book and our U.S. government, by two producers named Robert Emanegger. Excuse me? It's Emanegger. Okay.

It's like, it's like, it's as racist as Schwarzenegger. We're doing so well on this episode. And Alan Sandler. And basically, they were talking with a guy named Colonel Willie Coleman, who said they had this, and they had this footage of an alien landing. And what they wanted to do was do full disclosure. And when the government had come out and say, hey, we are working on the alien problem, we've met a couple, and we want everybody to know that we're handling it.

And there was a man named Paul Shardle. It was a terrible name. Shardle? Shardle. Okay. Shardle is, Shardle is that tiny, smearish shit. I shardled my pants. And he said that he had this footage.

Basically, they were going to release these two producers of a craft landing in Holloman Air Force Base in the shaft opening up and two guys coming out of it that are gray skin, purple lip, big noses. They basically go with the general to a commissary and have fucking lunch with each other. And it's all videotaped. It's supposed to be like 800 feet of tape. And they got it, apparently. And they were supposed to give it to these producers to make this big tell-all,

like alien documentary. And then, for some reason, it didn't go through. So, aliens are very interested in fertilizer and military lunch? Is that right? It's the ration lunches. Oh, I see. I just found something. It's just one of those.

I mean, like, yes, I was stoned when I was reading all about all of this. But I also feel that the coincidence is pretty interesting that that same description of alien is used in this one book from a technically a military source and then also from Betty Hill's imagination. Right. So, and I wonder, to me, again, leads to the idea of an objective truth is impossible to find with aliens because of the psychic nature of the phenomenon. Well, no, I agree completely.

We all put our own, when we see something, we all make sense of the things that don't make sense in our own way. While they may be similar, they're probably not, when I see a gray, it's probably not going to look exactly like what Ben sees when he sees a gray. When I see a gray, I see a future wife and you just see a piece of thing that you want to throw away, a piece of trash, Marcus, treat grays with some respect. I'm looking for love. What makes you a colonel, Willie Coleman?

I bought the pins. I just feel like there's a lot of people just like going to military thrift stores and then entering a common man and coming out of colonel. I think it's going to be a new little hobby of mine in Toronto. I'm going to go on Craigslist and start putting out things just being like, you want to know the truth about aliens? Meet me at this coffee shop and I'll just go to the coffee shop and dress full fucking Beatles from like, what's it?

Sergeant Peppers? Like full Sergeant Peppers, like Royal Canadian Guard with a big mounty hat on. I'm glad that you could come. Yeah, if you could just start dressing like you're a part of the military, that would make me so happy and just scream about aliens on the street. You'd make General Stockdale look totally sane. Before I can tell you the truth about aliens, I'm going to need to make this official by playing O Canada on the kazoo.

And that's the thing, you play O Canada in this place. Everybody's pants fucking drop. So how's filming heroes going? It's going great! Okay. So the hills are taken onto the craft at this point. They're actually being taken, they get taken up a ramp and they're taken into separate rooms to be given medical examinations.

Both of them involved both physical and mental procedures. They tested skin, hair and nail samples. Betty, they both got some very invasive shit done to them. Betty had this long needle inserted into her navel. She was told that it was a pregnancy test. So let's listen right now to Betty's own words as to what that experience was. So then they rolled me over on my back and they exhaled me with a long needle in his hand. And I see the needle and it's a millionth of any needle I've ever seen.

See, I asked him what he's going to do with it. And he said, just a simple test. He won't hurt me. And I asked him what. And he said he just wants to put it in my navel. It's just a simple test. I tell him, it won't hurt. It won't hurt.

It won't hurt. It even doesn't. And he said for days, it's in my navel. And spent... And I cried and I tell him, it's hurting. It's hurting. It's getting out. And as a leader, he goes over. And he puts his hand right in front of my eyes.

And he says, I'll be all right. I won't feel it. And all the pain goes away. Just a simple walk in the supermarket. This is a session in which... Oh, it's just ruining every part. They're crushing that supermarket bit. Does that sound like a typical trip to the supermarket to you, Marcus?

And by the way, those two clips are about 30 minutes apart. So that means from like hour 8 to hour 25, they just keep making references to the supermarket after every single testimony. Now I've been to a supermarket, but I normally get eggs. I don't normally get raped. Am I right, everyone? My navel is usually penetrated by a needle.

They're just trying to do some crochet or something. And also, I imagine this was like a pregnancy test. I mean, in a way that it's just like really just testing the pregnancy. You know what I mean? Where you just see how strong you are pregnant by sticking a needle in there and trying to swish it around so you can kill the baby. Yeah, that's the thing. If it was a pregnancy test, what would you...

Yep, that's a baby. We just killed it. Looks like it's about a medium rare. Yeah, they're testing it like a bizarre turkey or something. It's like when you stick a fork and a cake to see if it sticks. Don't get me started. So Barney, he definitely got a raw deal as well. He didn't get a pregnancy test. He got a semen specimen taken from him.

And they didn't... Did they milk it right though? If you milk it right, it's not so bad. They placed a cup-like device that was placed over his genitals. He said that he had no orgasm. Well, this is the thing, okay? Right. Oh, this is my new theory. I think Barney, love Barney, I think he's a very serious man.

I think he's just like, he just kind of glossed over it. I think he was just like, you know, I would say I experienced an orgasm, but I do believe that there was a sperm sample taken. We're cut to reality, him going like... And he's like having like fucking body-shaking orgasms with aliens. Aliens having to pin him down to the table while he's going like, I'm shooting, I'm shooting, I'm shooting. Some poor alien kid's got to go try to catch it.

One of the aliens who's in... One of the dudes who's in alien jail has to scrape it off the walls afterwards. Absolutely, and he's just like, how about we get the smaller, lighter alien to bend over so I could get it in the small of his back? Wow. Well, usually we go down to Earth and we rape them, but I think he raped us. And in another thing that he probably glossed over, he said that a thin tube was inserted into his anus,

but quickly removed despite his wishes of having it stay in. You think that's all I can handle? Think that's all I can take? I'm a strong man. No, we didn't actually tell you to lie on your stomach. You can just turn around. No more butt stuff, huh? You're sure you're done? I can lie here all day. Give it to me again and tell me I can't do it. He also said someone felt up his spine

counting his vertebrae. Betty, she confirmed, also in the hypnotherapy, the whole book thing where she was given a book and then right as she was about to leave, they took it away from her again. Right. Here's an odd fact about the hypnosis. They both said that the aliens seemed to have no conception of time or of colors.

They didn't really go into what they meant by that, but yeah, they said they have no concept of time, no real conception of colors, which might explain why when they tried to look human, if you want to go for that hypothesis that they are trying to look human rather than us trying to make them look human, why their skin is gray and their lips are purple. Right, right, right. It's just a little bit off.

Yeah, it's like every elderly grandmother in the UK. It's just like their hair's all purple and the makeup's all wrong. You know, it's just like they're just kind of missing it, but they think they look gorgeous and that's all that matters. Also, what Jacques Fillet puts forward is that the reason why these things exist, the reason why they have problems or they have quote-unquote problems with understanding quote-unquote, quote-unquote, time, quote-unquote. Are you doing air quotes by chance right now?

It's just going a million miles a second over there. We have a lot of quotes happening. Click, click, click, click, click, click, click. Good. The reason why they do this, and this is a central part of many abduction scenarios, is stuff like when he showed the map and they're like, where are you guys from? And the alien says to Betty, oh, you know, like, where are you from? You tell me where you're from.

If you can do, like, why do you care, blah, blah, blah. What they like to do is set up problems about perception of reality. And that is where the phenomena is important. They basically almost lie about not understanding time or understanding colors, because the point is that their very existence is supposed to bring about questions of how we perceive time and colors and stuff like that. So they're telling us lies. I hope you're high for that.

Yeah, and by the way, the whole time Henry is holding a pen, and he is flailing it at the screen the entire time. Oh, that's great. Yeah. So Betty reported a conversation with, oh, and by the way, the aliens were also very surprised that Barney's dentures could be removed. Ooh, my grandfather used to do that trick with me all the time when I was a kid. But it was weird that he had like a set of like dozens and dozens of dentures, right,

from like all over the middle of Europe. No, this was my grandfather that was from America, and your father was in the NYPD. Yeah, but I don't know how big his gold collection was. Well, I don't know how big my grandfather's gold collection was. How many pieces of gold? Like tooth-sized pieces of gold? I think that we discussed off-air curbing it with the grandfather talk.

I had another American grandfather who had dentures, and he took them out of his mouth, and I would laugh and laugh and laugh and put them in my mouth, but I already had teeth, so I had a lot of teeth. So Betty reported that the leader that she understood English, Barney also said that he heard them speaking in a weird mumbling language that he didn't understand, but he also understood them in English. So there was, they were kind of going back and forth between speaking to them

and their language. Remember that weird kind of European accent, and a sort of like mumbling language, like a weird language, almost like they were trying to figure it out between each other. A full muddled, a muddling of the English language. Yeah, but even so, Barney also said that when they communicated with him, he said that there seemed to be, quote, thought transference, and he didn't really know, he had no idea what telepathy was at the time,

so that was the only way that he could really explain it, and they said, both of them said that they never observed the being's mouths moving when they were speaking to them. They communicated in it, communicating in the English, but they weren't actually saying the words out loud. The thing that's interesting too is how he perceived the eyes. The eyes to him were always floating in front of him. So while they're kind of chipping away at the block he had about the missing time,

like leading into the interrupted journey is an incredibly long book. I read the whole thing. When they're leading up to the actual reveal of like him being on the craft, the thing that during this whole time he kept getting stuck on eyes hovering in trees, sort of like they say about the owl symbolism, like when they see stuff, and the way he put it is it brought ease eventually, because he started thinking, and he was like, what is that? What are those eyes?

What are those eyes? Oh, they're like the Cheshire cat. Oh, he's just the Cheshire cat, and started getting focused on this thing. It's very interesting how he perceives how telepathy can do that, just kind of override your whole function of perception, that it all becomes gobbledygook. Yeah. So he just knew that they knew that he was thinking what he was thinking,

and he knew that what they were thinking, even though no words were expressed. Yeah, and they both expressed that, like that was both reported by them. Also like when you go to Taco Bell. Yes, they know I'm in there to just buy half of the menu, and if it's a Pizza Hut combo Taco Bell, throw in some breadsticks, but put some cheese on them, but just charge me for the breadsticks. That's one of my funny jokes. So as they left the crap, the way they explained,

the way they described the treatment that the aliens gave them, is that the aliens treated Betty and Barney how humans might treat experimental animals, like how we would treat a monkey in a cage. Still well, but also still with no emotion. So after they were released, they were given hypnotic suggestions, so they would remember nothing of the experience, which is what supposedly accounts for the amnesia, which was broken by the counter hypnosis.

Right. And I've got a quote here from Dr. Stanton Friedman, our man from the video. He said, apparently he was described by one of the sources that I found as being, quote, a nuts and bolts man. He issued a statement that said, By no stretch of the imagination could anyone who knows them conclude that they were nuts. I thought he was a nuts and bolts man, though.

So he's just a bolts guy. No nuts. No nuts to be found. Yes, you guys. Just your typical trip to the grocery store. I don't want to talk about my movie, but let's give a little bit of a talk about my movie. Yes, indeed.

I would love to hear about it. It's called Stanton finds his balls. Oh, wow. Where were they? You know what's funny? They were between my pockets. I can't believe it. Isn't that the place to keep them?

So Betty's account was very similar. Her account during hypnotherapy was very similar to the events of her five dreams. There were notable differences, though. Details pertaining to the capture and the release were just a little bit different. The technology on the craft was also different. The short men had significantly different physical appearances

than the ones in her dreams. The sequential order of the abduction. The five dreams that she had, she had to set them out in sequential order later. Like the first dream was of the medical examination, the second dream, the car abduction. Like we talk about editing a movie. You don't shoot the first scene first.

You put it together at the end. Yeah, exactly. So yeah, she filled in a lot of details, but contradicted some of her dream details, which points to the possibility that they are two distinctly separate things, and also somewhat refutes the skeptics assertion that these are just Betty's dreams.

That Betty dreamt all this stuff, and she described it to Barney, and they're just remembering those things. Because you look at her dreams, they're sort of like a game of telephone when it comes to her perception of reality. Eventually, it's like your brain, because we don't even know what dreams are for.

A lot of times we think that dreams are either, I mean, they say it's supposed to be like your brain is organizing information and kind of dealing, and that's why symbols pop up, because they're dealing with the deep set. Weird unconscious information all the time, because all the shit that we see, but don't perceive,

or all the shit that we see, but don't consciously remember that just end up in the fucking data bank. So yeah, of course there's going to be some discrepancies, but you know, I'm no scientist. I have terrible dreams. Yeah. I had a dream the other night.

This is true. I had a dream that I was eating just a bunch of food all throughout my dream, and I woke up totally full. So that's kind of a fun diet. Why don't you take that plan over to fucking Africa, Ben, and help those people? Well, see now you've derailed again.

That's unbelievable, Henry. So let's get to what a lot of people point to as the most concrete evidence that something weird did actually happen here. We mentioned a little bit on the first episode, the star map. Now, Henry, do you want to go into a little bit about what this star map is all about?

No. So Benny was on the craft and was shown a star map. Quote-unquote. They were like, well, we'll show you where you're from and what you do, and they didn't answer any questions. So they showed her a star map, which is essentially, it was a piece of paper, but it's sort of a three-dimensional quality to it,

which is fucking dope. Which I had that shit. I want that shit in my house. And so you watched the view, and basically I had a bunch of different dots on it and lines on it. She said that she was told that the stars connected by solid lines, they form trade routes,

whereas dash lines were to less traveled stars, to less traveled stars, like a Steve Gutenberg. Oh, leave Steve alone. What's wrong with you, the Goots? He's great, but everyone's pulling for the Goot. He's less traveled, though. You got his map. I don't know where he's been or what he's done.

So basically, so she saw this star map. They, you know, the alien showed it to her. Basically, it seems like, in the way she put it to, the aliens, when they spoke with her, the beings, when they spoke with her, they had sort of a bemused sense of humor about, they were like, huh, yeah, let's show her the map. Okay, let's see what he sees,

and we'll see what happens when this dumb bitch takes a look at the map. And they go to look at, she goes to look at the map, and they're like, what do you see? And then they pants her again, need her pussy for like an hour. Oh, come on now. What test are they running with that one?

The patience test. Oh, okay. Yes. So this star map, she, during her post-hypnotic regression, she was able to draw, to reproduce the star map that they showed her. It was very crude, but it was still a star map. And at the time, they showed it to astronomers.

And it was, they said, okay, this doesn't really match any of the constellations that we know of, but about eight years after, when more powerful telescopes came into use, they were, they sent it back to some astronomers and they say like, okay, actually, this does match a certain star system out there. It matches the Zeta reticuli star system,

which we see again and again in alien abduction reports, especially when they come down and they tell people, okay, this is where we're from, you know, and of course, you also talk about, in our past episodes, you can talk about like the 12 main races. I think we've discussed in our Pleiadians episode. A lot of this is centered around Zeta reticuli.

Which is also really interesting, there was basically in sort of early science history, there was this paper that presented evidence in deductive scientific reasoning that said, apparently, Nikolai Tesla, another scientist named Todd, another scientist named Marconi, did this UFO study, and they're basically observing laboratory data in related phenomena that suggested the possibility

that they were monitoring interplanetary communications during the period of 1899 to 1924 on radio waves. Yeah, Marconi invented the radio, he knew what the fuck he was talking about. So all the shit kept popping up in an old-timey radio, and they're like, what the fuck is going on here? And I guess they, during that same time period, this Russian theorist, Konstantin Siskolovsky,

deduced a model of an intelligence existing independently of terrestrial influence, and the paper examined the possibility of identical radio signals on this time span, possibly emanating from Tau Setti, which is right next to Zeta reticuli. So maybe we're getting some of that shit. So it was Marconi, Tesla, and Todd. And Todd.

Those were the three that did it. Well, Todd was the one who broke the burgers. Nikolai Diacomanti and Todd. Todd. Hey, I'm Todd. Yeah, I'm part of the project. Next Todd, yeah. So you guys wear a muscle shirt, Todd?

Yeah, my boy's a real bitch, but you should see the fake tits that I bought her. Yep. Yep. So on August 4th, 1969, this is what, this woman, her name is Marjorie Fish. She was a school teacher, amateur astronomer. She got involved in the case in 1969.

And unfortunately, the same year that Marjorie Fish got involved in this case was the same year that Barney Hill died from a cerebral hemorrhage. Okay. Barney Hill died not too long after the actual event, just about eight years. Oh, okay. So he died in 68 or?

69. 69? Yeah. He had been in poor health for like years. Yeah. And the stress of this whole thing essentially killed him. Yeah. It really did.

Right, right. I mean, he was after the post-hypnotic suggestion, they were deaf. After they had kind of gotten all this stuff out, they were definitely improved. It helped them. Whether this whole thing happened or not, whether it's real or not,

it does, the fact does remain that this post-hypnotic therapy did help the Hills. Right. It did help them get over their anxiety. It did help them get over their fears. And they were happy, healthy people afterwards. Right, right, right. Well, relatively happy, healthy people.

Yeah. Barney still was dealing with, you know, Betty, talking about aliens constantly. Yeah. I mean, you know, there was happy as an interracial couple could be in the 60s. Yeah. It wasn't exactly the smoothest ride.

They could be as happy as anybody else, Ben. Yeah. I know they should have been able to be as happy as everybody else, but aliens are abducting them in the KKK once I'm dead. That is true. Yeah. So this woman, Marjorie Fish,

she was the person that Betty Hill originally drew the star map with. She said, or she was the one that showed her the star map. She said during the post-hypnotic suggestion, she drew it without actually paying attention to what she was drawing. It was, what do you call it, auto, automatic drawing. Yeah, automatic writing.

Right. Yeah. So this is something that came completely from her subconscious. She described the map as three-dimensional as if looking through a window. The stars were tinted and glowed. The map material was flat and thin,

and there were no noticeable lenticular lines. It sounds a lot like a reflective hologram. And she said that when she was looking at it, she was standing about three feet away from it. She said there were a lot of other stars on the map, but she was only able to specifically recall the prominent ones that were connected by the lines in a small, distinctive triangle off to the left.

There was no concentration of stars to indicate the Milky Way, suggesting that it represented reality. It probably only contained local stars with no real grid lines. Three of these stars in the clusters were unknown until 1969, and no astronomer knew of their position until 1963. And, of course, the Milky Way, that was also the name of the thing that the aliens did in order to ejaculate Barney. Oh, yeah.

What are you going to use, the Milky Way? Glaxar, why don't we give him the Milky Way cup? Oh, but it's just, we just got a jam that built his huge genitalian to it. Oh, my goodness. Yeah, you got too much to handle the alien. So astronomers, they put this star map into a computer. The exact position was a double star system, zeta reticuli 1

and zeta reticuli 2, 220 trillion miles or 37 light years from Earth, and the computer duplicated with virtually no variation the map of Betty Hill. It's pretty interesting. And there was no way that she could have known this. No. I mean, nobody knew this yet. Nobody knew it.

Yeah, nobody knew it at all. But, of course, you know, a big bummer man, Carl Sagan, he has to come in and debunk everything, he has to come in and shit on everything. Thanks, Carl. He argued that the seeming star map was little more than just a random alignment of chance points, that she just by chance drew a star map that matched zeta reticuli 1 and 2

and by chance just matched this constellation out there. But in contrast, those more favorable to the map, such as David Saunders, a statistician who had been on the Condon UFO study, argued that unusual alignment of key sun-like stars in a plane centered around zeta reticuli was statistically improbable to have happened by chance from a random group of stars in our immediate neighborhood. In astronomy.

The Betty's fucking slamming home some truth. Yeah, in astronomers, they're not like the idea of extraterrestrial life isn't totally crazy to them. I mean, from my perspective, most of the people who really study the, you know, study the, whatever, not the world, the whole galaxy system, they tend to conclude that there has to be life on other places. These days, yeah.

Back then, you know, of course, the scientists, they have to, you know, they have to go on cold hard facts, and back then, there were no cold hard facts to support the idea that there might be other stars out there that could support life on Earth. I mean, there's still no cold hard facts. There's any sort of evidence of life outside of Earth. It just happens to be, it just seems like it's got to be. Well, there is.

The universe is so huge. Well, we don't have a photo of Barney's rectum, right? No. No, no. That's what we really want to get. We would know the truth if we could just look at him, wink it. Let's all send individual emails to Stanton Friedman asking for pictures of Barney Hill's asshole.

If we get it, we'll know what happened to him, and we'll understand the truth. I mean, while we don't have hard evidence of there being actual life out there, we do have a lot more evidence than we have ever had that there are planets out there which could possibly support some sort of life. It's just impossible that we can get to it. Well, they say we have giant psychic worms on fucking Titus, man.

Woo! I want to go to fucking Titus. I want to slap a fucking saddle on one of them and ride around like fucking Dune, man. Yeah, they might just eat you right away. Yeah, but I'll be friends with them. Okay. So after the hypnotherapy sessions, Dr. Simon,

his official word was that the UFO encounter, while, yes, they did 100% believe that this is what happened to him, it was probably just a fantasy inspired by Betty's dreams. Betty's fucking mouth. Yeah. And there's other things that also possibly point towards this being some sort of something that was in their subconscious because apparently two weeks before this entire incident,

Barney Hill had watched an episode of The Outer Limits in which there was an alien featured on that episode that looked a lot like what they described the aliens as. Betty, I just got to ask you a question. Yeah, you got all these white people, white people seeing aliens. What is a black person going to see an alien? Right. One day, one day.

Well, the one thing we know for sure is that Barney was an unbelievable boyfriend. Yeah. Nice guy. Husband. Husband. Good partner. He really was. Yeah, because by the time the hypnotherapy ended, Barney was 100% on board.

Right. At first, he was very resistant, but he was 100% on board after hearing, especially after hearing what her side of the story was. And he heard what his side of the story was, what her side of the story was, and without them collaborating whatsoever, they interlocked. Right. They were two pieces of a puzzle that he felt were finally put together,

that it all finally made sense to him. And he completely and fully accepted that they had been abducted, and never quite fully embraced it as much as Betty Hill did, because Betty Hill became one of the most prominent figures in the ufology scene. Right, right, right. Like, she was constant. She went to conventions. She did interviews.

I mean, that's also how she got that dick. Yeah. And she got a lot of it, I'm sure. God knows. It's not easy to replace Barney. She went through the loss of her husband. I'm sure that at that point, I understand loss. It's hard when you're newly single and you want to get that dick.

Yeah. And so sometimes what you've got to do is tell everybody about your alien stuff, and somebody's going to be like, I'm sorry that happened to you. What if I throw it to you, Betty? Mm-hmm. You old woman. Right. A lot of Henry's dates lately have also had to ask him to get off of his stomach.

Yeah. No butt stuff today. You don't think I can't take it? Well, the series of veggies I've laid out in front of me, they would like to argue with you. So, I mean, one of the big questions a lot of people are probably asking, if these people were so private, if they really didn't want to talk about it that much, why do we know so much about it?

Why are there books written about it? Why was there a movie starring James Earl Jones released? Yes. Because in 1965, a Boston newspaper got a hold of the story and did a five-day spread on the Betty and Barney Hill story. They called it UFO Chiller. Did they seize couple? What do they mean by they?

What do you mean, you people? Mm-hmm. Interesting racism. But apparently, it was wildly inaccurate. And it was a bit of a smear campaign. So, they asked where the story came from, because that's when they started saying that he had genital warts and they were really smearing their relationship.

They were going at them being interracial. It's really fucked up, of course. So, they took over the news cycle. They were like, okay, well, this is going to happen. We're not going to take over the story. And basically, went full into the interview that became the book, The Interrupted Journey. Right, right, right.

So, as the facts of the Hill case came to public knowledge, after they came out after Simon released the tapes, after they actually had made some public statements refuting this Boston story, two notable, respected professionals investigated the story and made their conclusions. One was Dr. J. Allen Heineck, who at the time was professor of astronomy

at Northwestern University and later to be an Air Force consultant on aerial phenomena. He eventually would create his own UFO studies. The other, of course, Stanton T. Freedman, who it must be said, is a nuclear physicist. No, he's, and that's the problem. That's what it is. That's what nuclear physicists are like.

They're big, fat, annoying. They wear dumb pants, big thick glasses. They just have very important brains. Yes, they do. So, there is a lot of people with high credentials that support the Barney and Betty Hill story. Absolutely, because Heineck was a consultant to Project Blue Book,

so he was a part of the actual system, the government system, that was used to fucking investigate this whole thing, and he wrote a book called The UFO Experience. He says that they did reveal something that seems to be really true in hypnosis. And people all say that. They say that it's what it is.

It's about hypnosis. Again, it's the question about objective truth, that they believed that it happened. And that's as far as you can say. Well, I mean, you can put that with the star map. There's the star map, which is the only, I guess you could say the only hard evidence that we actually have.

And the biggest problem with the star map is that it had Crispin Glover at the wrong house. Yeah, of course. Always. I'm like a refund of this bus tour. I didn't actually get to see it. This is the big, this is the abduction case that started it all.

It's amazing. And really, I mean, the racial thing is very interesting. You know, the fact that this story got any traction whatsoever is fascinating. Yeah. It's a wonderful, it's a great story. I'm glad we were able to cover this one. And let's just, you know, kudos to Barney Hill.

Yeah. Like just crushing that white pussy. Jack Johnson tried to do it, that famous boxer, he got ran out of town. Yeah, no, but he's just, he was giving it the long slip. Yeah, Barney's the man and it doesn't matter if your white girlfriend, future wife, ended up being a little crazy.

You're still like sludging through that. And you know you got that STD from a random chick. The one thing with Betty though is that she had some jowls. Yeah, I mean, yes she did. Not to discredit her because of her looks. No, no, no. But those jowls make me hate her face and make me not trust her.

Right, right, right, right. Well, it's all real. Barney and Betty Hill abducted by aliens. Well, thanks everybody. Thanks everybody for listening. If you don't subscribe, go to iTunes. Subscribe to the show. It really helps us out.

Rate and review the show that helps us out too. Follow us on Twitter at LP on the left. Go to the Facebook group. Join that. We got over 4,000 people there now. Yeah, we're a weird community. We're just fucking cracking the whip on that Facebook group. Fuck yeah, man.

Crack! Well, you know, be nice to each other and stuff like that. And contribute stories that are fun. I don't personally mind the gore, but, you know, the Facebook group does reflect on us. Yeah. You know, so, you know, play to the height of your intelligence.

I don't like the new people joining, but the new people joining are the reasons why it's successful. It's a reason why we're, and, you know, we just love doing this podcast. It's our favorite thing on the face of the planet. It's a lifeline for me. It's how I reach out. And you're doing such a good job doing that.

Yeah. So, you know, if you, I'd say, if you post a gore, then wait five more posts until you post another one. Post Paranormal or something about Michael Myers or Freddie Krueger. Anything. Yeah.

And you know what? You know, the gore, you know, some of the stuff is pretty cool. Someone posted like a Ouija picture the other day, which is really cool. I mean, that's got some historical context, but I don't want to see some dude who just got his head run over while he was on his motorcycle. That's not contributing anything.

So, like, put something out there that contributes something, you know, that might actually spawn a conversation rather than just having someone go, eww. Yeah. Yeah. And I just want to give a, I want to give a shout out to Mandy. What's up? Mandy's up.

And I also want to give a shout out to Carmen, Amy, and Tim over in Australia, who gave me quite a series of drunk messages. But you guys are on the, you guys are the opposite of the planet. So you're sending me stuff and I'm just waking up to it. That's great. Let's give a shout out.

Let's give a shout out to Natalie Jean, who is actually in studio listening with us today. She's a horror icon. Find her, find some of her works. Yeah. And she's Ben's hostage right now. Yes. Yes, very good.

And I'd also like to give a shout out to the mysterious benefactor, who sent me a Scientology book, but did not include a name or a forwarding address. Was it Miss Gavage? Ooh, it might have been. Bring it, Miss Gavage. Where are you at, Miss Gavage? Also, Lord Andross, talk to Crystal again.

Okay. Okay. Now you're just doing personal connections, Henry. That's what happened. You're turning into Delilah. What is wrong with you? Love lasts only when love is going to last. Perfect.

And if you want to really help us out, go to cavecompanyradio.com slash last podcast on the left. You can buy a last podcast on the left t-shirt there. They're $25 for domestic, $40 international. And you can add, hell, if you want to just throw us a buck or two, that really helps out a lot too. We've had a bunch of people do that, and that stuff really adds up, and it really helps us out.

And last thing, I'll gain everyone. Yeah. I'm going to give a hail yourselves. Thanks so much for supporting all the CCR shows that especially Marcus and I do together. Hail Satan. I am getting a GRISP. I'm going to call it, I'm going to say GRISP.

A GRISP on Chaos Magic. And so, shit's about to go down. I don't know what's going to go down, but shit's about to go down. It's going to be big, yeah. Since you're doing Chaos Magic, you can say GRISP. You can do whatever you want. That's right, man.

I'm my own avatar, man. Henry, quick update, dating life. How you doing? Things are fine. Things are good. Toronto is, Satan works in mysterious ways. Yeah. I got weed.

Okay, good. So Satan brought you a weed dealer. That's all that matters. Let's do a magustalations. Magustalations, everyone. Hell, me! Goodbye. Fuckers.

You're fuckers. I'll leave them alone.