Last Podcast On The Left - Episode 323: The Men in Black Part I - You Fed the Tulpa

Episode Date: June 30, 2018

​We're finally getting into what is possibly the most well-known aspect of alien culture: the Men In Black! Join us on this first episode for the origins of the MIBs both real and imagined, white-skinned red-lipped horrors in suits, and a possible explanation for some of their stranger behavior. Fantastic Dim Bar Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ Fanfare for Space Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.co

There's no place to escape to. This is the last talk on the left That's when the cannibalism started I don't want to trigger anybody today who predominantly wears black I feel like it's a lot of our audience. Yeah, we're not the best. We're not trying to shame Goths No, mostly who we are trying to shame though is it's people in suits People in suits are scary because you never hear like When I heard the door knocking one two three

And it didn't sound like a normal knocking it sounded like a pounding And then I turned the knob and I opened up the door And it was a man in a hot dog costume That's never scary. You're like hot dog man We're in Buffett on a Saturday. What's going on man? All right? Welcome to the last podcast on the left everyone I am Ben kissle with Marcus farks. Hello, and we got beautiful Henry Zabrowski over there on our in our west coast studios. I'm so fucking sight I also have never been so chock full. I think I may have done more research for this episode than even the

Scientology episode. Yeah, it is ruining my life. All right like this this this this episodes get into my fucking brain I was having men and black fucking nightmares. Yeah, let me shit is creepy as shit Let's jump right in so you can get it all out of your brain So you can be smart again because if you listen to the this week side stories Henry came full circle really dumb So let's get that out today. We are going to be covering the men in black and wow I had no idea per usual how weird these stories really are So the men in black phenomenon is among the most widely known aspects of UFO culture Mostly due to the series of movies starring Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones. Yes, cue the song Marcus

Come in black. Oh, very good galaxy Sugar water Frank your skin is falling off. I've been working on my Tommy Lee Jones impression. Yeah, you guys ready? Yeah, let's get ready for this Yeah, it's for the show Where does he get these wonderful tool? That's a jack Nicholson from Batman However

The actual story of the men in black is much more multifaceted than a simple summer blockbuster really. Thank you Marcus You're welcome. It was a pretty complex film The emotional aspect of it between Tommy and will it was a complicated relationship. Yes So over the course of the next two episodes We're gonna cover the men in black in all of their potential forms from your classic G men's suppressing tales of UFOs to full-on Demons hell bent on manipulating the world. Oh my goodness Seriously, I want to go ahead and take your Warner Brothers branded men in black memory erasing flashball Uh-huh throw it out the window and we'll maybe use it or whatever forget everything that you've ever known

Oh, we got the man in black. Yes, fucking use it. All right, use it But I think technically we owe money to Warner Brothers if we if you do use it, okay But this story is a tale it is a phenomenon that it has I've obviously been tangentially into for many many years and when you fall when you further dive into the subject number one It's definitely like a Open a manhole to the deepest darkest recesses of ufology Okay, is we are gonna be covering soup to nuts every single theory that it gets looped into The men in black story that that is anywhere in the ufo

Ufological world interest soup to not I never understood that term soup to nuts because soup is a food and then in the nuts are also a food No, they're a screw The nuts is all of it's the tale of the original guy actually It's the true story of the the original chef Boyardee who was a real chef Which is true. He was a chef in World War two understood that he can mass-produce raviolis for our troops He wasn't a splooshing All right, well stick his dick in some nuts But the this is a truly frightening story the men in black are the perennial real villains of the ufo world

The only thing close to them is the reptilians. Oh and when you you get into their lore I mean honestly, I was definitely I was truly having nightmares. Yeah me too. All right Makes sense. Can't wait to hear about it. Well despite the myriad of different tales told about the men in black There's one thing that all men in black stories share no matter what the ultimate aim of the various men in black are The common denominator and all these stories is the keeping of secrets However what the secrets are and the reasons behind the secrets tend to vary Depending You have to if you wish for secrets like that. It's like they want to tell you it

Well, the reasons behind the secrets tend to vary Depending on what form the men in black take. Okay, some of it is indeed just about the cover-ups But other stories belies something either far more sinister or far more mystical Or both, okay, what? Wow Oh But before we get into those stories, let's acknowledge our main source for today Today's book is the real men in black by Nick Redfern Which is a really fun collection of stories that I'd highly recommend for anyone into Grant Morrison style high

Strangeness and we interviewed him for our patreon series and I will say But on the the looking at the picture of the back of this book and also talking to him in person I don't even know how he holds his keys from being covered in pussy juice Yeah, if you really if you dig the invisibles and all like the really weird shit that is underneath the story of the invisibles Like the real men in black is absolutely the book for you. All right Also, but and I'll also bring up the casebook on the men in black by Jim Keith Which is another book that I have been reading never mind We'll get to it and I would like to also bring up this

Unused script for men in black for Personally discovered it while we were in Los Angeles and it's got a lot of things to say about society So let's begin the tale of the men in black in the mid 1940s with the concepts originator. All right, Albert Bender. Cool That's a pretty good name for a concept originator of the most usually these guys have goofier names Albert Bender Albert Bender's some great name. Yeah strong guy. This guy is a proto nerd Yeah, he is the proto type of the super nerd and he was the first person to ever be visited by the men in black. Really? Albert Bender was a chief timekeeper at the Acme shear company

Which was at the time the world's largest manufacturer of scissors wait hold on a second You're telling me that this guy was the chief timekeeper When everyone is busting their ass to make scissors so that you can inevitably stab your family with them He's just like what do you do? He's like I keep the time. Yeah, that's it. I am the timekeeper We got seven minutes left in the afternoon shift to get all these papers all snipped snipping because they're not gonna snip themselves Let's go snip it up everybody. Let's put some snip into it. All right. Come on. It's a scissor factory That's amazing. So this guy he was like one of the first first jobs to be lost to automation in this place just a clock

Very much. Okay. I mean, I imagine and I mean, I don't know exactly how these assembly lines work But I would imagine in an assembly line type of atmosphere a guy keeping time on everything and making sure that everybody is doing Exactly what they should exactly when they should is a very important job. Maybe I'll like him Maybe a little bit further on in the story, but right now. I hate the chief timekeeper Part of it is that I think it's a lateral like move because at some point he's sitting there be like I have a question Why have we not developed any left-handed scissors? Like how about we make you the timekeeper not the most hated position in the factory Because of Albert's obsession with time

He kept 20 chiming clocks in the attic room where he lived and every 15 minutes They'd all go off at once. Wow this guy. This is a this is a Twilight Zone episode Oh, yeah, it kind of is in a weird way. It really is especially because he turned his entire apartment into a horror house Yeah, yeah, yeah the house where that attic room was located was shared with his stepfather But Albert made the best of it by painting his walls with super metal images of monsters and ghosts, right? Like he was actually a pretty cool guy this dude was into it He was he was watching the first like the formations of the first sci-fi movies He was a big sci-fi nerd all of the amazing stories articles is what he was deeply into

He loved adventure stories and things of a flying saucers and ghosts and vampires and shit And he lived in a creepy house filled with clocks Yeah, but he also painted demons all over the walls which he shared with his stepfather, uh-huh, which is a weird relationship to cohabitate with now as Henry said This guy Albert Bender made his room into a makeshift haunted house that he called his chamber of horrors And he built the whole thing just to scare his friends when they came over The whole thing had like rubber bats, and he constantly played 1950s Halloween sound effects records full of thunder and sobbing He'd invite the women over from the factories with their their other factory

Boyfriends because when you work in a factory with women that are jobs are just their jobs to polish the scissors and the men's jobs are to Hinge the scissors and they all have to keep each other sane so they don't start what? Stabbing each other with the scissors dangerous office. Yeah, and so he would do these fun things We invite everybody to have a party at his house, and he's like you must see my chamber of horrors And they all go up into the attic and where he lived with his stepfather He's like never mind father He's not my real father and then he'd go and they'd be like looking around because also this is like the 1940s So they haven't seen shit like this

They don't really understand the idea of a pride election with ghosts and demons and so they'd be like what the fuck is this? And then he'd rig these things up where you could drop spiders from the ceilings onto the girls And he was like and they just ran back to the arms of their strong boyfriends, and I say who needs them You miss I would never mess with anyone who works in a in a sharp in a bait. It's a knife factory Yeah, it's a glorified knife fact. Yeah, but you can just go buy knives You don't have to get knives from work now, but you could take them from work Whatever so what was the wife still around or no, it's just him and a stepfather stepfather. Yeah Yeah, who knows two single dudes just fucking having a killer time right about that is a strange combo

See Albert he came from one of those witchy families who always told horrifying stories about what became of their relatives You know those types of families were just something bad has happened to everybody right like for example one tale The family told said a relative died of a brain hemorrhage caused by a ghost that haunted the local cemetery Yeah, that is awesome. It was a hot ghost woman That's true really a lot of info here But bender also suffered from intense OCD as well as another possible undiagnosed condition which may have contributed to some of his more Fantastical interpretations of the events to follow, but we'll get into that later

Honestly OCD probably a good condition to have for the chief timekeeper the best condition to have Yes, okay. Yeah, exactly. That's how you make sure every second is accounted for and not a single snip is left on the fucking dance floor So Albert benders deep dive into the paranormal began in 1946 a full year and a half prior to the Kenneth Arnold sightings which many in the UFO community consider to be the first major credible sighting of modern times look that up if you want look that up if you want some good UFO history It's it's the first major recorded UFO sighting He was a he was a pilot and he submitted an official record of seeing these discs flying around his plane Yeah, so he's really on the forefront here of all of this stuff

Oh, yeah, because the whole thing with him started with the ill-fated Flight 19 Whose disappearance kicked off the world's fascination with the Bermuda Triangle And now we know that that was ocean farts. Yeah, basically, right? After that Albert devoted every free moment he could find to researching the paranormal and the occult By 1950 that research had intensified to the point where Bender felt confident enough to establish along with a few buddies One of the first UFO networks the precursor to organizations like NiCAP and MUFON Oh So this is in the 1940s just getting together with a bunch of other people

I feel like dressed really well Everyone just seemed to dress really well back then and talking about UFOs Everyone had the like mother of pearl like shirt with tan Suspenders tan yeah with a weird kind of sweat stains on it Right cigarette stain ties a lot of like goopy news in the hair even though they got nobody to look good for right But they wake up every day They put pants and suspenders on because it keeps them from off on themselves because their feet were too crooked to be in the war Well, that's not so bad if you don't got to be in the war

Bender's network was the international flying saucer bureau aka the IFSB This is gonna be me once I'm done with all this show business fucking bullshit I'm gonna be able to just discard all of this stuff and just go and just let my mind play and form a group of other Like-minded individuals. Yes, and we will get to the bottom of the men and black issue if I ever have children I can't wait to go and have them visit uncle Henry and then I'll slowly like pull them closer to me and then we'll leave Been marred by the truth This bent creature good to see you Henry Now it took two years from the original conception of the IFSB for it to get off the ground

But when it finally did the whole thing took off in part to its relatively popular magazine space review Here's my review Jupiter one star What's no tits on it? I'm gonna tell you what one star no tits on it also would not serve me a hot dog No matter how much I yelled at it. That is it's a planet. So but the IFSB nor space review were faded to last very long as just a few months after it was all established the harassment began Who's there? They were getting harassed. They were getting harassed. Why are you gonna harass these people? Oh, you're about to find out You didn't read the outline

Yeah, it's more in the moment. No, I did I pretend to forget it It's like what I take I it's like I have that little It's all a performance My performance is so good that you we forget. Yeah, that's true Marcus gonna test. I'm open looking at it right now Good Lord Well, but the harassment began with what would become a regular part of men in black encounters phone calls Now when the MIB call

Sometimes the receiver is met only with an eerie silence, but I'm gonna have to correct you on there It's MIB. You gotta say it. You gotta say the MIB. I will fight you on this Yeah, I have to say the MIB. I can't say MIB I don't know. MIB makes them sound like they have the same body as the violator I just feel like hey, where are you? Where are you? And it doesn't quite instill the fear of MIB But at the same time I like it though I do like it sounds like the mentally handicapped man that J. Edgar Hoover kept underneath his desk That would suck on his feet all day. Oh, I'm gonna get that John Lennon

All right, all right, I won't call him MIBS anymore. I like MIBS now is it what's the difference between men in black and MIB? MIB stands for a group of them. Mm-hmm But doesn't men in black, it's not men in black. At no point is it ever a man in black. Are they ever alone? Yeah, they are, okay The MIB is just you say men in black when it is you're talking about them esoterically. Okay. MIB is the entire genre of men in black. See, I believe MIB No, no, no Men in black is the entomological Origin

You know what? I am actually understanding why this made you dumber. Just get it out. Get it out the men in black is The concept of men in black. Okay, and MIB are a group of men in black All right, and MIBS are Not not not there not not there not allowed not allowed. So when the MIB call Sometimes the receiver is met only with an eerie silence But some people who've had experiences say that there's either a metallic screeching or a garbled robotic voice speaking nonsense Tell me do you like Kathy Griffin?

You're wrong. You're wrong. They're wrong. So they're they're pranking people that well, they're intimidating people Because all they have an avocado sandwich. Why don't you my good friend? Are you my friend? You are my enemy avocado sandwich Haha strange phone calls coming to the house this week. Well in the case of bender It was just a stillness that inspired his anxiety Then bender started to believe he was being followed after one night at a sci-fi movie Bender went home opened the door to his room and was met with the overpowering stench of sulfur He then saw a bright object hovering in the middle of the room, but when he turned on the light it vanished So Albert checked his research files and due to his intense OCD

He knew for a fact that someone had been perusing Or just like the stepfather looking for like a pair of socks to wear That was gotta be a titty magazine somewhere one of these shelves and Things only got worse from there for an entire year Bender was put through the ringer followed everywhere by the smell of sulfur plagued with migraines and poltergeist activity And most disturbing of all he was haunted by men in black suits He there's a gussine in this that I thought was it's pretty fun where he is at the movie theater Watching a movie and he felt someone staring at him. I don't know if any of you any of you have ever had that I get it

Quite a bit because I I like to see horror movies alone and I cackle throughout them so people just kind of stare at me all Time they're always eyeballing me and it's just been like do you really want to be eyeballing the man cackling alone in the Horror movie like should you be the guy? I don't think you should you should leave him do his fucking devices Well, I don't know I don't think you were really intimidating to people either You got your big gulp you got your nachos Well, I have brought either a canned wine or a can of beer I'm sitting there drinking in him and they're fucking go between between my legs suck on my vape There's a lot of reasons people are looking at me sure

But I'm sitting there to imagine but Alfred Bender sitting there Watching the movie and he feels something staring at him Hmm, and then he looks over and there's a man at the crouched at the end of the row staring at him and his eyes are glowing like this Wow, wow, wow, wow, and then he's like what and he look turns away looks back dudes gone Hmm, and then he sees this again and again He's walking to the streets alone seeing these things with glowing eyes coming at him And I have this whole scene in my head of him walking through the alleyways to that Billy Idol song eyes without a face

So one that inspired Richard Ramirez. Yeah Yeah I don't know the rest of the words so he's having or he's having a real Pee Wee Herman experience in that movie theater It was just staring at him doing whatever he's doing. Oh, yeah My goodness. Yeah, and he said that every time he'd see these men he'd feel stick sick to his stomach Then they actually showed up at his house in a group of three They were all wearing black suits and Humberg hats, which are pretty much like a slightly different style of fedora They're very nice hats and a lot better than fedora's overall. Yeah, I suppose so sure. I'd say it's definitely a choice

That's what people did back then though. So the men communicated with bender telepathically and told him that any and all research on UFOs should stop immediately When he first got spoken to by them the first he didn't know what was happening Well, you would start to do is they have during the the International Flying Saucer Was it Bureau? Yeah International Flying Saucer Bureau. I believe well during the IFSB meetings They would have these belief they sit and be like we are first of all what we're doing here is we're welcoming Aliens to the planet Earth. Okay, we don't at the time there was a lot of fear of flying saucers and aliens So they were like we're gonna be the welcome crew

So a part of what they used to do which is now what dr. Quote-quote doctor Steven Greer does Hmm, they sit in a circle and they would materialize they would mentally picture themselves Shooting up into the universe and sending a message of peace out saying calm aliens come to us come on me Come come right. I think you're stuck on the word there. Yeah, and so It's what they would imagine he would imagine himself floating on a raft in the Atlantic And that was one of the like after he had started seeing them like and they broke into his house He said he met them and they they showed up in this weird this This kind of non space is black space and the first things they said to him the first things they said to him

Which is I just want to happen to be so bad You have dedicated yourself to the solution of the strange problem of unidentified objects in your atmosphere Your interest is deep and sincere and you have devoted many hours to it We also know that such interest in determination might lead to something that could bring you So then after that there's like I also brought some punch And I know I know Steve you're supposed to bring some cookies for for last week's mistake What do you do? How do you even like look at these people after all this man? I mean everybody's just like wow wow, but then friends in public. No, you never acknowledge these secret

You never acknowledge like when we did I did a group of all comedian D&D playing We all we it was a bunch of us playing D&D together and no one would speak about it out loud to anyone else Okay, it's a secret and the interesting thing about that big ritual that they would do where they would all sit around together Is they would print in space review? They would announce what date and time they'd be doing it and they would ask all the readers to do it at the same time It's awesome. Yeah, and but which also is really interesting because you know to bring up the invisibles a little bit Grant Morrison did much the same type of thing when the invisibles was on the verge of being canceled We talked about this before where he asked all the readers to do a masturbation schedule all at the same time

To save the series from being canceled and it worked huh look at that. Oh, yeah, so these types of like mass These big like mass rituals are you know, I wouldn't say they're real or anything like that But you know, there's there's something to it. There's something to all that shit Well, what if you were late would Bender he would kick you out. Yeah, he's timekeeper. That's his first job no matter what Well, interesting well after the men in black told Bender to seize all investigative activities They then confiscated every copy of space review that they could find and Disappeared in a cloud of yellow fog again leaving behind the smell of sulfur farts right and

So just a year and a half after publication began space review had its last issue Printed with this message the mystery at the flying saucers is no longer a mystery This source is already known, but any information about this is being withheld by orders from a higher source We would like to print the full story in space review But because of the nature of the information we have been advised in the negative sorry We advise those engaged in saucer work to be very cautious Alright, is it possible the sulfur? Maybe it was a dangerous situation with the sewers You're thinking of methane sulfur and methane are two very different very different very different

Yes, yeah sulfur smells like hell and methane smells like farts That's what farts are that sulfur smell to that sulfur has a bit of a fart smell No, no, it's like sulfur's matches. I don't know. I don't know. You know what I mean I never took that Somalia a class or I could smell the different things and tell what it is I guess the sulfur actually you light a match after it's up my hour. Yeah, yeah, sulfur covers up the fart sure Yes Now of course a cryptic message like the one Henry just read was perfect fodder for the already competitive and paranoid field of

UFO research these guys have been jealous of each other from the very beginning. Oh, they weren't getting along Oh, well different UFO groups are very jealous of other UFO groups because they all want to be the only one with the story Right and even though Bender dropped the story for the time being a fellow IFSB member named Gray Barker picked it up and ran with it in 1953 Barker published a book called they knew too much about flying saucers What's your book all about? That is the most self descriptive title of all time They all had to be like that because you people were buying good things They didn't have to they didn't get to read reviews back in the day

You'd have to actually choose a book by its cover. So you had to make it good Okay, and that book featured Albert story and it coined the name which would serve as the catch-all boogie man for conspiracy theorists everywhere the men in black Now Barker is an interesting character here because he was at the same time a believer and a known hoaxer Who'd like to play pranks on his fellow ufologists? Okay? He even did it like the fellow men in black believers. He'd crank call them Like specifically the most gullible ones and he'd imitate like the the harassment the men in black would do interesting hello Is mr. Bender there?

Yeah, this is My name's Tom. I'm one of them guys in black Yeah, what you should return yourself to the asshole store That's sad yeah, I mean I guarantee you these guys as soon as that prank call ended. We're like could have done without that You're going extremely well as it is I could have would have been nice if it was a pleasant phone call Oh, yeah in Barker Barker He also liked to egg people on particularly Albert Bender like for like he would just encourage these guys And he would build up the story like almost gaslighting them right and like telling them that the stories were something that were actually much bigger than

They remembered it being but it really muddies up. Where's the truth? Yeah? Well, that's what that later on other ufologists will go on to say that Barker wrote both books because we'll find out that also Bender wrote a book. Well, I'll get into that after that. Let me get into that after that But Bender was really serious about the story. There's a there's a core truth in this that seems to be at some point He was actually approached by like feds at some point and telling him to stop it and then that was the original emphasis to stop the IFSP he was getting really fucking paranoid and at that time like obviously when you are dealing with all this alien stuff for him It was like goofy goofy, but then it seemed to be there actually were eyes on him

And then Barker went and kind of flipped it up to sell some books. I see. Okay, so Barker doesn't seem to be a nice He's not the nicest guy. He's at playing around. Well, he's part of the mythos of Ufology is storytellers like Barker. Okay. Yeah, and so like Bender for a while He's stuck to the you know relatively tame if not spooky men in black story that he originally told okay But nine years after that encounter Bender published a book called Flying saucers and the three men and who boy is it? Is it a doozy? No, I read about 30 pages of it and it gets pretty erotic There's a lot of actually a lot of erotic writing going on with these characters

It's a specifically one guy that we're gonna talk about later on in the alien abduction sense of erotica like the fellow that we interviewed Henry Yes. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, he gets real Barbarella with it and so he's writing all of this stuff next to his stepfather Just like staring at his stepfather. Yeah, man We're cuz the sex isn't happening in his room next to his stepfather, so it's happening in his mind They're not all living in the attic together You meet at the refrigerator cuz you're both a little hungry and what are you working on it? You're like, I wish I could tell you stepfather, but it's disgusting for me to discuss with you some know

He would be like you can tell me all about it. I'm a stepfather stepfather's all we do is fuck Well in the story of the flying saucers and the three men the men in black didn't just threaten Bender and vanish into a cloud of yellow fog in This version the three men surrounded Bender and rendered him unconscious with nothing more than a touch of their hand on his shoulders Next thing Bender knew he had awoken in a secret underground alien base in Antarctica Oh There the men in black told him that they were not human But we're in fact only appearing to be so inhabiting bodies. They'd stolen from earthlings What do you imagine getting your body stolen?

What a rough day that is just going back to your wife me like I'm a ghost They took my body. I promise you it's still me. Yeah, like ghost dad, which is unfortunately a bad reference now The aliens went on to say that our planet planet earth was a cursed planet full of suffering and chaos and unlike any other Planet in the galaxy the only reason why they came to our shanty town of a planet was because they needed our seawater as a power source And that's so shitty now is it Yeah, you got that you need other little you need half of our planet, don't you? We were only one of the many planets used pretty much as like they looked at us as like an intergalactic gas station in a bad neighborhood Oh hell. Yeah, man. We're the street trash now. Hell. Yeah, we scare everybody else

So after berating Bender for God knows why the alien revealed his true form And turns out the alien was almost identical to the artist's representation of what we know as the flatwoods monster of Braxton County, West, Virginia What I mean, that's not the only time West Virginia will be brought up in this story Just please tell me you didn't turn into like a giant spider like the end of it Kind of sort of like the the flatwoods monster is among the more terrifying looking cryptids Where it's got these huge red round eyes It's got kind of a hood behind its head But that kind of looks like a big plant like a long arms with big spindly fingers

And it wears like a very kind of a dress but like a weird like silver one It's very creepy and it's much akin to the moth man Yeah, big glowing eyes, and it looks like a big old labia with an alien face in the middle of Oh my goodness, that's exciting like a Mosh and Thrasher remember that the headbangers. Oh, yeah What does that have to do with this? They wear skirts Oh you just anyway to connect I heard the word skirts. I'm like, I remember when a tank team used to wear skirts So I don't know I understand I understand

So after these guys got Bender good and scared they sent him back to his attic with a warning. They said quote You are charged to keep our secret We do not wish to take extreme action And you will find that you will often consider giving away some part of this information When you get such thoughts you will be reminded of the consequences by headaches, which will be almost unbearable to you at such times beware of more serious conditions we can bring about a For our

erection Henry maybe you can answer this but why did they do that? What do you mean? Why did they take them all the way to Antarctica just to tell them that humans are a bunch of pieces of shit and then tell Them and then show them who they actually were and why they were there and then tell them don't tell no one I literally have the word-for-word their reason from the book casebook on the men in black Thank you We feel that you are a very good contact for us on your planet of earth

You are an average person and we know that what we tell you and show you will not be believed by anyone you might tell Yeah, you are not a person of great renown on your planet. Therefore. We have nothing to fear at present I like that he got a little self-defacing humor in there Now that was the alien saying He was writing but that's a thing that's still not a reason I'm asking why they told it why not why they told him specifically that why they would tell anybody because no one's gonna Believe him, but didn't he's just an average person. Yeah, but why would they because even an average person is also bored Stop Marcus. This is this is trickster. God. Shit. This is a trickster God shit

That's been around since the beginning of time and that they pull you up They yank you out of their life. They link they yank you out of your life Specifically just to fuck with you just and half the time. What have we learned about aliens? Even if aliens are real and you've been abducted. Why should we fucking trust them? Which is the double layer of paranoia that creeps into your mind as you really begin to study UFOs That's how you really begin to understand that you've become a ufologist when you can't even trust the words out of the alien's mouth Yeah, Marcus you bring up a good point And I'm sure there are men in black who just go back to their men in black managers and like why do we have to abduct this guy again?

Like why do we have to bring them to wherever the hell we're gonna bring them? What is the point sir? You are not to ask the reasons why you are to do and die Now admittedly that story is kind of goofy. A little goofy. It's a little goofy. However They're very well could be some truth to Bender's story It could just be that Bender filtered his visit by men in black through the lens of mental illness Combined with a close friend's wild imagination. Okay Now back in the early 50s, and this is true the FBI put together a group of scientists called the Robertson panel whose job was to assess the national security implications of all the UFO sightings that plagued America for the previous half decade

Hmm, that's good. Maybe you put them in a big rubber band and say you don't get out of that rubber band until you solve the UFO issue And that'll be good. And then that'll keep them together. Oh, so the government works like double-dare Yeah It is head headed by Mark Summers speaking of OCD. I love Mark Summers. Oh, yes Now the panel ended up concluding that the UFOs in and of themselves were not a threat If they ever were indeed alien craft and not just misidentified objects in the first place quote unquote Robertson panel quote-unquote Not a threat It's your fucking answer the fact that they they needed a reason to close project blue book after they already used the poor

The poor man that would they was dragged through the mud J. Alan Heineck who was forced to debunk all these alien visitations and UFO sightings where he did he had it ended up flipping him into a believer Because of how much he had a life for the government who? Well, what was the last episode that we brought up Heineck on I think our last alien episode we talked about Heineck a lot and this whole Phenomenon right Hudson Valley Triangle Hudson Valley try on us Yeah, so if you want to know more about all that go listen or Hudson Valley Triangle episodes But what the Robertson panel ended up deciding was that while the UFOs themselves were not dangerous the ideas of UFOs were See America was fresh out of the Korean War at this point

Which you know the Korean War was essentially a proxy war between us and the Russians The Russians had back the north we'd back the south and while Cold War paranoia was not yet at its zenith The military was extremely concerned that a sneak attack from the Ruskies could come at any moment And it still can yeah, I feel like they're making all of these decisions while eating white bread with liverwurst Yes, just like Walter Mathau in the movie charade. I feel like they ate a lot of that It's so good You get some raw onion on it with some really really intense horse radish mustard You can never kiss like a person you love ever again, right? But it's an incredible sandwich, okay?

But with all the UFOs being seen on what seemed to be a daily basis It was thought that the public's and by extension the military's minds would be muddled by all this UFO talk and the Reds Would be able to slip right through there's all it's very interesting because there were a UFO sightings In the early 1950s above the White House that was a lot of people called them in pilots called them in it was documented a well-documented sighting and They weren't concerned about the aliens. They were like, okay, whatever world will get to that But mostly they were just concerned about we've scrambled jets to go after these UFOs The Russians will just attack us one of these times and what if they're making the UFOs because now that's a whole other

Side jaunt to this whole story is the beginnings of people like whether it's a kind of a chicken-the-egg scenario Whether you believe somebody like if you believe Philip Corso that wrote all of the book about Roswell by the idea that when Roswell correct when the ship that Crash at Roswell, they were trying to like retro make it into a UFO of their own And there was there were several countries trying to make these like weird saucer like planes So they were thinking that number one this could be a foreign Technology that's coming to attack us a number two the people that are propagating the belief in the

Extraterrestrial version of the story of UFOs could be filled with communists that are using it to distract us I just don't feel like they had that technology because they had satellites so easy a dog could pilot it You know, so maybe they weren't quite there yet. Maybe Now after the Robertson panel FBI director J. Edgar Hoover Oh known for cracking down on subversive cultural elements in America gave his own two cents He started to think that the commies might start infiltrating UFO groups like Albert Bender's IFSB Hoover's thinking went that one of these guys in one of these groups could create a panic were they to gain enough credibility and That panic would distract the Air Force which would leave America wide open for a sneak Russian attack

That makes all the sense in the world. Mr. Hoover. Thank you for coming into the war room today to tell us your strategy and plan Yeah, and the whole Russian thing that's in conspiracy thought too now if you'll remember we actually we covered Roswell very Ex sensitively if you remember from our Roswell series one theory about the 1947 crash is that the craft was just a Soviet experimental aircraft stuffed with deformed Russian Mental patients sent to create an alien panic that never happened. I mean it kind of did happen didn't it? Sorry a 51 we all know it, but that's the thing. It wasn't ever a panic. It's more of it is a Fascination fascination and distraction, but it was never a panic and a great destination for tourists They were afraid it was to become it was gonna become a panic, right?

But I will tell you what the one thing that that theory taught me to never do is Open a pinata in Russia because you I never want to see that shit. I never want that to be no Yeah, and the alien question was so burning in the minds of the government that J. Edgar Hoover Actually sent out for a copy of Gray Barker's book They knew too much about flying saucers and that's actually a matter of public record There are many there are many records on the book that showed that J. Edgar Hoover was actively researching these UFO groups He really felt I mean obviously we know how paranoid and how awful J. Edgar Hoover was but he went deep into it so there there is a whole world of

Feds investigating these UFO researchers that I honestly think is the first indication of where these men and black stories came from Mm-hmm. Sure. I mean it seems like they're taking these people a little too seriously. Aren't they? It's just a group of guys But if you're J. Edgar Hoover like we got really big issues going on civil rights war all this kind of stuff I am it's interesting that they took all the time to investigate these folks it shows How seriously they took the UFO issue and how until then they've been and since then they have been ridiculing the issue Oh, yeah, and saying that people that believe in UFOs are cranks because they don't have the answers that They are supposed to give to the American people to create the stability that they crave to keep their fucking Corporateocracy going. They do have the answers and they're not telling us. Yeah, I mean the American government can't go

So pretty soon J. Edgar Hoover started sending out FBI agents out and about to ask a few questions And it just so happened that the Robertson panel, which was top-secret at the time was formed the same year that Albert Bender Had his experience with the men in black In fact Gray Barker author of the book that first mentioned the men in black got a visit of his own from a few guys Who are particularly interested in the IFSB? The story goes that a few weeks before the visit Bender had printed out business cards for his IFSB But friends and he gave Barker a set of business cards that named him as chief investigator I love nerds so much because we all love because I'm the same way, you know

I love a lion nerd as we've talked about with my move on VIP investigator lanyard. I love it It makes you feel secure, right? It's nice to have the card because when someone says like what do you do? You don't have to say I live with my stepfather. You can't say I am chief investigator of the IFSB I love that they all live like Buzz Lightyear before he found out he was a toy Like they are very serious about their mission. They're really into their roles Yeah, but they also these guys you can also tell they have like a back then at least they had a little bit of a sense of humor about Themselves, okay, and they were also they weren't quite as serious about all of it. They were having fun Oh, I mean these guys are having a ton of fun with each other to get it

I mean this is the before Vista print. I mean this is it's tough to get a card back in the day Oh, yeah, yeah, who which one of you listeners remembers the free Vista print? Because I used to have piles of those that I got for some fucking reason no idea why yeah didn't even have a job And I still had them. Yeah, great idea. The first step to a career Stupid little piece of paper Well, it was these IFSB business cards that brought the FBI to Barker's doorstep Now Barker said that he'd only given a few of these business cards to some close friends and as far as he knew They all still had them what the FBI was like they got business cards now

It's getting serious I guess because according to the agents that were asking the questions one of those cards have been found in the Pocket of a mysterious man who had shown up in a Florida hospital suffering from unexplained seizures, okay? But apparently Barker's assertion that he knew of no such man satisfied the agents because all they did was thank him for his time And then they left and they were never seen nor heard from again And that's not the only one of these types of stories There's another story that it's about a man named Harold Dahl that cited a crashed UFO on Maury Island in

1947 three days before Kenneth Arnold observed his UFOs and he saw he basically he saw a He saw an object crash. He went and he was flying above it He wouldn't he looked at he was because he was another pilot He saw a bunch of weird white metal spread along this beach He got his friend Fred Crisman to fly him back over to go pick up a bunch of this metal And then eventually they don't know what to do with it so then the story of Kenneth Arnold came out and because he was like they called him said would you come and help us deal with this you Our own UFO story and he showed up. They were paying him

They were all like going through all of this this weird metal this white heavy like very like light for what it's supposed to be metal And then all of a sudden this guy just showed up the fucking g-man showed up and he was like hey So we're gonna take all this where you guys are you guys didn't see any of this shit Or we're gonna throw you in jail forever and peace and just like and just left and it was like they don't even know how he fucking Heard about the story. Wow. It seems like there's less alien crashes or UFO crashes than before. Maybe they're becoming better drivers Well navigating our environment better Hey, you know actually that is kind of sort of a theory that we're gonna get in into the next episode when we start talking about Aliens and saying they navigate the the environment better and know a little bit more about our

Dimension all right or our time And it goes it gets better as the century marches on okay Well Barker was by no means the only person being visited by the men in black in 1953 That same year two of them showed up in an attorney's office in parts unknown as the story was told to UFO Investigator Harold T. Wilkins under condition of anonymity According to the source two six and a half foot tall Abnormally thin men dressed in the classic men in black black suit black fedora one two Appeared one day unexpectedly in the attorney's office where the source worked interesting

These two men were immediately given high-level jobs within the company But no one but the head boss knew who they were or what exactly it was that they were supposed to be doing there But what people did know was that the two men weren't normal for example Their wrists and hands didn't seem to have any joints at all really and they appeared as if they had only a vague notion of How a human acted as if they had just like skimmed an Informational pamphlet a few days earlier, but it's weird with them with they didn't know how doors worked They would like walk up to shit me like what is there's apparatus? They're like that's a door How'd you even get in here?

You couldn't use it in the first place. It's like the high strangest kind of starts immediately interesting It would be hard to open a door without without bones in your fingers Yeah, I suppose so if you had no joints or anything, but I mean that's the thing Maybe they were just like some sort of vegetable material that could be bent at will could be Interplaces that are the push door Then how do you get out? Well in addition to all that these guys also had superhuman strength on one occasion one of the guys despite being Impossibly skinny put his hand on a metal filing cabinet to steady himself

And when he removed his hand his fingers had left indentations half an inch deep cool Toffee yeah, like me. Oh, yeah, then on the outside fad on the inside Of course one of the employees who were freaked out beyond belief called the FBI as one did in those days and suspicious Characters were about Wow, but the MIB's must have gotten word because by the time the FBI showed up the strangers were gone Interesting today's last podcast on the left is brought to you by blue apron Skit meal planning and get straight to cooking with blue apron enjoy unforgettable meals inspired by the vibrant cooking of the Mediterranean like seared salmon and spicy orange salsa Centered around fruits veggies lean meats and plenty of olive oil these recipes are deliciously nutritious

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That's blue apron comm slash left to get your first three meals free blue apron a better way to cook now these are just examples of What I would say is the more normal half of the men in black stories wait, which is we're We're yeah, can I get a bud light line because I don't think I could handle all if that's the normal half This is this shit where men in black are very scary There's a part of it where we're about to head into the high strangeness area of the men in black the part where they kind of Jump the plot where they go from being misconstrued G men to being the demons of the ufology world, okay? so on September 11th

1976 Dr. Herbert Hopkins a general practitioner who practiced hypnotherapy Received a visit from the men in black concerning an alleged alien abductee the Hopkins have been working with named David Stevens all right, and that's when they had really really nice pocket watches to put you to get you into that zone Yeah, yeah, that's where you have to be and then then they suck your dick first part of the process So David Stevens abduction was pretty run-of-the-mill But it still caught the attention of the men in black, which is actually fairly common in these cases It's actually rare that the men in black show up on the scene of a sighting that's gotten a lot of media attention Why is that we'll get into it? Okay, we'll get into it

So one night Hopkins got a phone call from someone claiming to be from the New Jersey UFO research Organization a.k.a. Nijufro, yeah, Nijufro, man thing was though the Nijufro didn't really exist. What do you mean? There was no Nijufro. Well, then who called? The man in black oh from Jersey. Oh But Hopkins took the stranger at his word and invited him over that very same night And this here is another fairly common occurrence when it comes to men in black encounters often times people go completely Against their normal instincts and will invite these strangers into their home without ever really questioning it

It's only afterwards that they realize that they let a weird skinny stranger into a black suit into their home Just because the weird skinny stranger asked. Yeah now. I mean that is how lonely do you have to be? To just be like well you've asked so of course you can come over you got a you got a cross-check it with how many friends You have in common on Facebook like you did a whole thing It's also very similar to the stories of the vampire that we will get into also later Now in Hopkins case as soon as he hung up the phone He walked to the front door to turn on the porch light for the stranger But much to his surprise the stranger was already in his front yard

And as soon as the light went on the stranger walked up to the door and knocked Wow When Hopkins opened the door He found that the man was naturally dressed all in black But his skin was so white that the color was closer to a corpse than that of a living being All right, let's not malign this well-dressed guy from Wisconsin No, this is what he was he would this is that it's the he was like a living Scarecrow and he showed up all fucking herky jerky all weird with his skin Unnaturally white and his clothes just fucking hanging off of his body

Just hovering in front of the door immediately after his phone call. Yeah, and this is 1975 So it's not like he had a cell phone. He was calling from the front yard right and there were no phone booths around either Oh Don't don't so don't go thinking that Yeah, and honestly the car phones also a couple of years off too so take that out of the fucking equation Wow, yeah, they say your skeptics. Yeah, and the weird thing about this guy was that he was also wearing gray Suede gloves. Can you do that? What can you wear gray? Yeah, you can wear a gray have accessories that are great

No, you're talking this is very there's a lot of weird stuff that's lumped into this This is what the term high strangeness means. There's many things that are gonna feel incongruous Almost on purpose. Okay, and furthermore He had no hair. He didn't even have eyebrows or eyelashes But the most disturbing feature was the man's thin bright red lips He had these painted Joker like lips on now I mean like put yourself in the man's shoes for a second you open the door. There is this gaunt Man hanging there with with a smile that is in my mind

Do you remember the cut scene from Lord of the Rings when they talked to Sauron's emissary? Mm-hmm, where he does the thing where he's like he's like you see yeah, yeah, it's like that where he is Just like tell me that you were inviting me over and then he has to be like it's very creepy Oh, yeah, then he looks down and he's got a sixer of Bud Light I mean that's a commercial Wow, but still Hopkins invited the stranger inside without even knowing his name Well, why okay? All right once inside the stranger started asking questions about Hopkins latest hypnotic regression patient David Stevens But as he asked the questions Hopkins noticed that the stranger had no accent and spoke with an Unemotional and monotone voice and moved robotically again as if he wasn't quite sure how to be human Wow

This is the part that I love the most. I said he's sitting there He's he had a very strange habit as he was asking him about his patient He would tap the front of his mouth using the back of his fingers Which was a very strange habit Yeah, again sounds like a person who's never had a habit before Where he's touching a thing and as he would touch his face. He didn't have red lips. It was lipstick He literally had a hole with no lips Painted on lips on top of it and he kept wiping them off onto his gloves. It's gone

Excuse me. There seems to be a problem with my lips. There seems to be a problem with my lips That's scary Yeah, and after the stranger gleaned as mitt as much information as he could about David Stevens He changed tack and started guessing the contents of Hopkins pockets. Well, what what other content could he get other than like? But he turned to him and he's like Take out the coin that is in your pocket, and he reached down and he pulled it out of us He pulled out into his palm of his hand and he said watch the coin And as he was watching the coin

His vision began to grow fuzzy and he started like getting double and he looked at it and it started smoking He's sitting there watching it and then it changed color and then it disappeared. Yeah turn blue Hmm. All right, okay This was not too long after the death of Barney Hill Oh who along with his wife Betty if you'll remember was among the first famous alien abductees Of course go listen our Betty and Barney Hill episodes more information on that and so the Creature whatever it was the man in black asked him they're sitting there's like do you know what happened to Barney Hill? No, I don't reply to Hopkins. I know that he died. Hmm. Do you know what he died from a

heart attack maybe No That's not entirely accurate. He died because he knew too much And then he said that he used the technique that he used on the coin on Barney Hill's heart Oh my god, and then and just like cut to like mind-freak But it's not he Chris Angel wasn't there no he was not Chris wasn't even born yet wasn't even born yet Yeah, and then the stranger told Hopkins that if he wasn't careful the stranger was gonna do the same thing to him Yeah, and that's don't let him into your house. Well Barney Hill

He'd actually died from a cerebral hemorrhage, but Hopkins didn't know that he didn't know that yeah And the stranger then told Hawkins to destroy everything he had on the David Stevens case who then Something seemed to go wrong as the stranger got up to leave His speech started slowing down and he couldn't seem to walk straight. He just said my energy is running low Must go now. Good. My and he Wandered towards the door like all herky jerky like Vincent D'Onofrio for men in black Where he's like trying to get out the door and he can't use the door and he's like kind of like weirdly like shuffling

Yeah, down the steps. Do we know for a fact that Joe Cocker wasn't a man in black? Too big too big oh way too big gotta be gotta be skinny Oh gotta be more of an Ian Curtis to be a man in black. You can't be there's not a fat man in black There's no they're not allowed, huh? I don't think so. Okay. No, absolutely not interesting So Hopkins helped the man in black to the door open it up and as soon as Hopkins opened the door a bright light Appeared in his front yard the man in black Did a herky jerky walk towards it and both of them disappeared forever? So Hopkins was freaked out so he immediately

Demagnetized all the tapes of his sessions with David Stevens and then for good measure threw him in the fire along with all his notes and files Wow That's what Madeline con did in the movie clue. That's right. Yeah, thank you flames Now here's the big question What the fuck was that thing? What the fuck was that thing? This is where it works. Yeah, I was about to actually ask that exact question without the prompt Well, Nick Redfern and many others think that the answer to some of the most bizarre of the men in black tales can be summed up with a single word Tulpas

Tulpas, do you not remember kissal? What a tulpa is? Yeah, I know what a tulpa is. I know what you guys done to him What is it? What is it? What we done to him? What do you mean? Do you know what do you think a tulpa is? You know, I'm not gonna just isn't a fashion show I don't got to get too deep into what I know about tulpas well to give you a refresher We covered these things a long time ago. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah a tulpa Maybe this will jog your memory. Okay is a kind of thought-form energy ghost. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about Thought-form energy ghost. Uh-huh. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, so what is a thought-form energy ghost?

It's the thing that you guys did gross things with no Don't know that I never did anything gross with a tulpa with a tulpa. No, I had a flesh like what are you? I don't know that which in the flesh like was very real and manufactured in China. I just use my hands I use that as well. So we all know what a tulpa is But it's a part of it, but it's truly like how do you explain something like this? You could just straight up say that that man is lying and nothing ever happened, right? Which is obviously a thing which does happen quite a bit people seek attention But the men and black phenomenon this is just one example of it next episode

We're gonna go even to even more of these examples of the of these this entity That seems to be created almost by us. Yeah Yeah, like that with the use of a tulpa a Tulpa is a being that is brought into the real world from the imagination of the conjurer Using nothing but sheer will. Yeah, it is theorized. No, no crap Yeah, it is theorized that the men in black are actually Tulpas created by nothing more than the sheer imagination of Albert Bender Bender's possible experiences with the FBI combined with his own mental powers and the imaginations of his fellow

ufologist cohorts Essentially brought a living idea into this world. Okay. I have a working theory in my mind That if you are already seeing UFOs, don't you fucking laugh? I just I do want to know why is how is it a working theory? But I don't working theory means that it hasn't been proved yet, and you're still working on Which me and I'm writing nothing I'm doing no math So technically not helping science at all, but I I have my inner belief now after reading So much about UFOs is that I believe it if you're already seeing UFOs

And I believe that what we've talked about with the and especially with the Hudson Valley Triangle is that it involves something called the M&M Technology which essentially we're 50% of the phenomenon that we are the we complete the circuit of Seeing the UFO like we bring it into existence Partially because we are attempting to observe it and whatever the intelligence that is behind it It's decided that's the way it wants to present itself to us, and I think men and black are the same thing Except they are the evil side of it. Well, then why can't we can't we just do a negative side of it Can't we just do what parents do when they're upset with their children be like I brought you into this world? And I can take you out and then and then break these things. Oh, I'll get

The thing about Tulpas is that like all living creatures because they are living creatures even though if they are just thought forms Tulpas need to feed on something and what Tulpas need to survive is high emotion. Oh, yeah, like Roseanne Yeah, and that's whether it be like love anger or depression what have you every Tulpa feeds on something different Oh, but in the case of the men and black if they are indeed Tulpas what they need more than anything is fear Oh this yeah, like the Baba Duke. Yeah or Monsters Inc. Yeah Yeah, this read for an argues is why the men and black seem to go after cases that are in the grand scheme and Consequential like the David Stevens case, okay? Now the men and black They're not visiting like the Travis Waltons of the world the men of fire in the sky guy

Because if they were to visit that guy then they just be a small part of the story But if they visit people whose sightings are more run run of the mill then the men in black become the story I see they are psychic attention hordes that it's kind of a thing is that they have to kind of almost propagate their own existence and if they are actually a an intelligence if they actually are a thing that exists and this is one of the Extending fingers of the thing right it presents itself to our reality as this men and black It will fight as hard as possible to make itself exist Like we do like we have to do in order to survive and that fear that doesn't have to come directly from the person who

Opens that door if you were all creeped out by the story We just told about the man with the bright thin lips. I am that would feed the Tulpa. Oh I fed the Tulpa Well part of it we're sitting and joking about it But we're also feeding the Tulpa by blasting this out to our listeners And also that was the thought that kept me fucking paralyzed awake last night as I sat because my I'll go through Eventually, oh, we'll eventually tell the tale about how my apartment buildings It seems to be pretty haunted

We have several members of my apartment complex that have seen ghosts in our apartment complex And I went down to the recycling bin last uh-huh where they've been seeing these fucking ghosts really and I'm walking around there But like and now all I'm seeing is the white dude fucking with the red lips just appearing over the cars and shit scary stuff I don't know dangerous territory. We're playing in here Well, you asked earlier how to fight back I did now it could actually be argued that the movie Men in Black and the subsequent sequels actually serve Against the interests of the real men in black as the movies portray them as a lovable organization Protecting humanity complete with like a cute song

Propaganda I think if you want to take it really far and this is my own thinking here Would you know of course influenced by the invisibles if you believe that some movies are made for purposes other than money But some movies are in essence magic rituals Then it could be that men in black was actually made to combat the evil tulpa entities accidentally created by Albert Bender It also did make a lot of money It really did butch wait guys and so can I actually then tell you okay? So I have actually been working on my Tommy Lee Jones impression. Can I do it now? Okay? Can't quit you

I Broke back mountain. No, it's not even an old person You you get me they're in their 20s. I think during that It's an impression though, and so we're getting there Well the men in black they need fear Okay, so if the Tulpa theory is true then it's possible that the real men in black share more with tinkerbell than Tommy Lee Jones Marcus quit your scalding reviews of the men in black I'm going there

I'm going there, but on the other hand Albert Bender's visions could have an explanation that is firmly rooted in known science Epilepsy yeah He was smelling weird shit. Yeah hallucinations migraines All of this could have been the result of a single of single partial seizures also known as Jacksonian epilepsy and also I love this study. This was great Marcus. I forgot about this Mm-hmm. Yeah, even the poltergeist activity mentioned could be linked to this as it has been theorized that the unique neurological makeup in the brains of epileptics is firmly tied to RSP K

Recurrent spontaneous psychokinesis, okay? There's something about the way their neurons fire that could tap into some sort of telekinetic activity So does it make it less real or is it still a real phenomenon? It puts this is always this is always the question kissel Yes, like this is a part of what we're what we're talking about here is that is Perception then reality like does it become real like is there also a part of it is or is every single thing that we now view in The paranormal umbrella. Is it just science yet to be discovered? Yeah Now even the trip to Antarctica by Albert Bender could have just been a hypnagogic

Waking dream hypnagogic being the state between wakefulness and sleep Well, you know, you know these great types of dreams like when you're about to go to sleep and suddenly you feel like you're falling Right or you like have one of those dreams where the dream is set like halfway between your bedroom and your imagination, right? Oh, yeah, it's like I woke up last night from a dead sleep. We imagine I had a water bottle squeezed between my legs And I was pissing well I was like shooting water all over the sidewalk and then I woke up really having a pee. Mm-hmm. There you go I actually had one of these while we were researching this I had a dream that Me and Henry were interrogating a man in black in my bedroom with Carolina sleeping right next to us

All right, I was in a hypnagogic state myself. There it is sweet But perhaps most telling is what happened to Albert Bender in the mid fifties That was when Albert Bender met his future wife Betty The two were married pretty soon after that and from that point forward As far as we know, there were no more visitations from the men in black. Well, she just there are many she put a stop to it Well, she just started having sex with them. Yeah, it's a part of his fantasy I don't even we think we got to is that when he was talking about when he went to Antarctica Is that he was also surrounded by three giant breasted grays that were rubbing lotion all over his skin to cure his

Hypochondria, yeah, and it got very graphic and a part of it It was that and so now once he's got his wife doing the lotion rubbing then he doesn't need to think about aliens all the time All right, I think as a cop out Because the happiest ending that I can think of notice an alien expert or someone no busy by the minute He got married. He found love Henry. Yeah He moved to California managed a hotel for the rest of his life and died happily at the age of 94 All I know is that wow my fiancee and I are As deep involved in the alien scenario as two human beings could be together and it provides us shooting

You need to find something that's not gonna deny the best part of you and also because it makes it all steamy in the I don't know if you really regret it not being able to be haunted by the men in black any longer I think she might have saved I think he was very happy to be to put all that behind him. Yeah I will never put down my sword and shield Against the alien menace, but a part of this. I so these are just some Theories yes about what the men in black are and we are just Scratching oh, no, we're at the next episode. We got moth man. Oh, we got the Mandela effect We got time cops we got vampires and we got the great beast six six six himself

Alistair cruelly, wow good and also nerds going renegade. Yeah, so this is just a little bit man We're just sticking our fucking toe in I hope that that you guys are ready for this next little leap because one one of my Favorite things about this topic is about how deep? Balls deep it goes well into all of it there Just stirring that caulk around that big ol lump of sauce man. All right. It is It's a creepy creepy subject to say the least. I can't wait to delve deeper into it. Oh, yeah Oh my goodness. Oh my no my favorite parts are still to come very good I know I actually did even have a better Tommy lean Jones. This is actually reason. Okay, are you guys this is real?

Okay, this is this is actually this is much much better I got I got it if you say I don't want your life in the accent of James Vanderby We have to end the show immediately. I will I will not do that. Okay. I Don't want your life That's the closest I didn't do it in the famed James Vanderby. Yeah. No, no, that was that sound All right everyone, thank you all so much for listening Thank you all for giving to our patreon without you. None of this is possible. Apologies We've been so slammed busy these past couple of weeks. We haven't gotten a good great interview for you

But we will get one up a very very soon. We promise you that is there anything else that we want to talk about Just yeah, well, we'll see you guys out on the road this summer We still got there's some tickets available for our San Diego show that we're gonna be doing during San Diego Comic-con this year And yeah, thank you all so much and thanks everyone for for supporting us day after day and thanks for supporting all the shows Yeah on the last podcast network, you know, you got a blanket's top hat Page seven wizard the bruiser when we sign with the Mads all kinds of cool shit all available over there on last podcast network Com absolutely anything for you Henry. I mean we got the social means

We will be finding out The exact days For our Up here, we'll be finding out the exact times for a show for the new true crime festival run by brightest young things Oh, yeah, I believe that the day passes have already sold out and we will be so we'll keep a look out For those tickets that will be revealed were released and that true crime festival will be held during November 3rd and 4th Yes, can I wait for that? I mean, I guess people really love lanyards. Don't they though people love land Honestly, I've come around to the landlord after been after being cuffed by one of those. What are you bracelets?

Oh, I hate it. I can't take them off. They're the worst Land yurts with the lanyards because you put them over your clothes You don't look like an asshole kid wearing the stupid bracelet all day long because then you just look like you're an alcoholic And I already have my face to show that I am an outlaw So follow us on Twitter at Henry loves you at Marcus Parks. Don't follow Ben Kessel. He's no longer in Twitter He got out very very lucky follow us on Instagram to see the highlights of our lives at Henry Dr. Fantasty at Marcus Parks at Ben Kessel the number one and follow the last podcast on the left on all of the Co-opted systems that are used to slowly but surely change our behavior to make sure that the

Corporateocracy is as comfortable as possible. I at LP on the left I'm not sure if we should even plug social media anymore because I think you basically nailed it Yeah, the corporate. Yeah, the corporate overlords are like keeping us in line. Yeah, they are 40 characters at a time Hail yourselves hail Satan Elgin Hail me and understand once you delve into the world of the paranormal and met him black. I'm not too far behind Magustylations everyone