Last Podcast On The Left - Episode 334: Flat Earth

Episode Date: September 29, 2018

Join us for a deep dive into the hottest conspiracy on the Internet today: Flat Earth! We're covering this from every angle that we can, from the actual beliefs to the people behind it going back to the 1800s and most importantly, just why this conspiracy has caught on the way it has in just the last five years.

Hello, this is Henry Zabrowski, and we've got new live shows! Last podcast on the left was looking to go on the road for a little bit of fun, but you know what we found? Nothing but trouble. It's a funny joke. November 7th, the Majestic Theater, Dallas, Texas. November 8th, Paramount Theater, Austin, Texas. And November 9th, Hutterberg Center in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. We're coming to Oklahoma. It's gonna be so much fun. We got presale links up on the Patreon.

Ooh, I'm gonna be so full of barbecue at the end of this trip. The doctor's gonna be like, You're gonna need to go to a hospital. Because your salts are at an unhealthy level. Can't wait to see you fuckers. Hail Satan, and enjoy the show. There's no place to escape to. This is the last talk. On the left. That's when the cannibalism started.

What was that? Hey, tell me. What? Mr. Marcus with your fancy haircut. Hey. Your sparse, cute little bangs and your girlish hips. Ooh, they're very nice. I don't sit waggling around. You hanging out with these scientists all day?

What's the sound? Hey, I couldn't help but notice you're here. I said hello to one or two, yeah. Yeah, you and your precious little globe over there. Having fun playing your fun little Harlem Globe Potter game with it? Is that what you're doing? I'll tell you what. Don't think the earth's flat.

Why you get them flat ass shoes? All right. Welcome to the last podcast on the left, everyone. I am Ben Kissle with Marcus. You're trying to step over my tree. I'm not. I'm wondering, what's a site? An activist scientist?

A siteivist? Is this a new term? Is the Scientivist with their Scientivist agenda trying to control our government with them rockets? That's all they want to do. Why don't you just go ahead? You love rockets so much. Why don't you vote for one for Senator

and then marry and make it your illegal husband? Well, I will say, there's a lot to be said about government. I just don't think there's too many scientists. I don't think that has been a huge critique of government. All I know is, if I was standing on a big old circle, my flat ass shoes would have, there would be curvature absences from the toes and the heel. And I would only be standing on the arches of my feet.

Your precious fucking circle world. Well, you are standing on the shoulders of giants, my friend. Today's episode, today's episode, we are, I was going to say, getting out of this world, but actually we're getting into this world. We're going to talk about the phenomenon of flat earthers and the concept of the flat earth. This is a conspiracy theory, but honestly,

the more you look into it, it's a way of life. It does seem that way, yeah. Because it's taking no shit from anybody, including your own eyeballs. Really? I don't know if flat earthers don't take any crap from anyone. I think they can take quite a thing. More than Biff from Back to the Future.

I'm pretty sure these guys eat a lot of dung. You mean to tell me my asshole can't cram more crap in it than it's already got in it? I'll show you. The only globe I care about is the globule style of my fucking asshole. Well, called by some, the greatest of its kind ever exists. The flat earth conspiracy theory is exactly what it sounds like.

The earth is not the globe structure we have all been taught it is, but it is rather a flat disk surrounded by ice, or the ice is in the middle, or it's under a dome, or it's a pyramid, or it's a diamond propped up on seven circular pillars surrounded by a four dimensional portal that pops people out the other end like Pac-Man when they enter it.

Yeah, you idiot. Or it's just round? What the fuck is wrong with you coming into my home talking about waggling, oh, what do you want it to be? You want the earth to be just one half of a big galactic butt. That's what you want. Well, the point here is that there are only two things that all flat earthers agree on.

One, the earth is not round, and two, man has never been to space. Okay. One very frustrated documentary filmmaker quoted in a New Yorker article about flat earthers sums it up perfectly. Yeah, someone, if their car is blue, and they say no. So you say, okay, what color is it then? And they say, I don't know, but it sure as hell isn't blue.

This is the sort of logic that defines the flat earth movement. Is the car blue? Absolutely not. Okay. It's anything but. Anything but blue, if you say it's blue, then it must be black or something that's not even a color like black. I don't know what the fuck it is,

but it's certain nothing you told me what it was or something that the government told me what it was. Honestly, this phenomenon, it's very interesting because the one thing that really frustrated me when we started researching flat earth is that when you look it up, the first thing that comes up is every single hot take, internet, either web series or something taken a hit at flat earthers, saying that they're dumb,

showing all the irrefutable information that the circle is definitely round, that we live on a globe, they try to throw all this logic at it, and they go, flat earthers are dumb. But when it comes down to it, there's something else here. Yeah. Because Marcus and I were talking about this as you go in,

it's like, I have a weird sort of, I care for these people. These people are lost in a way that I don't understand. When I was rambling a bunch of theories at Natalie, she said a very interesting thing. It's like a bunch of people read a philosophy book in middle school and then never read anything else ever again. They're having those 13-year-old blow your mind discussions where you're like, dinosaurs, bones are the oil that's underneath our feet.

It's a great place to start. And I really enjoy the idea of questioning your eyes and questioning all society, but what brings you to the point where you don't believe in depth or volume? There's people like that where they're like, yeah, yeah, 10 feet. Yeah, what's even feet? Yeah, you're measuring things in feet.

That's so 2017. Well, it is interesting because it's relatively mainstream. Marcellus Wiley, former football player, great political, great sports commentator, believes the earth is flat. And so does Kyrie Irving of the Boston Celtics. And he dribbles a ball for a little bit. So he knows what circles are. He knows what balls are.

So what we want to do with this episode is that, you know, we don't want to just make fun of flat earthers, even though we are going to do that. Yeah. We don't just want to do that, though. What we really want to do here is we want to try to understand flat earthers. What are these people all about? Where do these beliefs come from?

And who is essentially at the top? All right. Now, upon researching this phenomenon, the thing that surprised me the most was that the flat earth theory is very tied up in Christianity. In fact, a lot of flat earthers point towards the Old Testament to support their claims, but we'll get into that later. There's a lot of nephilim and the archons also make a resurgence deep.

Once you get deep into this, and then there's the pyramid dimensional prison that technically we're in, that earth is a flat disk floating in a pyramid prison created by Satan and the nephilim that are just pretending to be aliens. Wow. If you're not. That sounds kind of fun. Well, what's most fascinating about flat earth is that although

the modern line of thinking began in the 1800s, the recent resurgence really only began to gain steam about five years ago. In fact, reporter Michael Marshall found after interviewing all of the speakers at a flat earth conference last year that almost none of them had even heard of flat earth until 2013 with some of them only hearing about it as late as 2015. That is just a two year turnaround between not even seriously thinking about the shape of the earth

to giving long-winded PowerPoint presentations at a conference. Well, I'm sure you'll answer the question, but what happened? I don't know. People are scared of what's underneath their feet. They're so scared and so distrusting of any single thing that crosses their nose, eyes, ears, or mouth. They can't even agree that there's like air. They don't know what air is.

They think that the planets are fake and that they're put there and that they are alive, that Jupiter is alive. And then it gets to the point, I understand hollow moon almost because at least it's just one planet, which is the idea that all of it is fake. Well, the nice thing about living in New York, I know what I'm walking on, trash.

The entire city is built upon it, so that's good. Now the general consensus is that for most of this millennium flat earthers were consigned mostly to obscure forums and even then those forums are just kind of a healthy mix of non-believers and people using an untenable argument as a kind of intellectual exercise. They're essentially starting it at flat earth and then arguing that the earth is flat

while knowing that the earth is round. Well, yeah, because it's devil's advocates university. And they all got BS's in it. This piece of shit. Hold on, so they know the earth is round but you're arguing that it's flat? Well, they were just having fun with it. They were having fun with it.

Yeah, they were having fun with it. But then around 2013, something changed. Hold on a second. What? So are you telling me in this country a joke got out of hand? Yes. Is that what all this is about? Yes.

Oh my gosh. Kind of. Part of it, it's like, I understand, again, because of Chaos Magic and the reading that we've done and using psychedelics. I understand the idea of playing with the thought of living on a desk. Sure, but you're going to do it enough

that you do a four hour series. And then if you go on, there's that one guy called Connective Thinking. I forget what it was, that collective understanding. He's like one of those weird nonsensical YouTube channels where every day he's got a two hour clip show and him rambling better than I've ever rambled in my life. Wow.

For an hour and a half of pure, just made up off the dome material about Flat Earth, that's a big old jump. Cool. Well, around 2013, something changed, although nobody has really been able to pinpoint what. One thing we do know, though, is that 99% of Flat Earthers say that they were converted

by YouTube videos. What's the 1%? I don't know, a book? Maybe a book? No, just going out there throwing a Frisbee. And you throw in a Frisbee back and forth. He'll go, man, wouldn't it be kind of fun to live on top of one of these, just zipping around a galaxy?

And these buddies are like, you know, I read a pamphlet at the truck stop the other day. You know when I was getting blown by that dog? Yeah. It said to Earth's flat, just like this Frisbee. No shit. Wow. Now, if you're being cynical, you can say that 2013

was around the time that the internet and computers became ubiquitous and easy enough to use where pretty much anyone could utilize a computer. There might be another factor in this. Between 2010 and 2014, shipments of smartphones worldwide rose from 300 million to about 1.2 billion. Whoa. That means-

Congrats, Apple. They need all of our congratulations. And that means that people who formerly couldn't understand how to open up Internet Explorer could now reach the internet using a single button. The rise of flat Earth also coincides with the mainstream rise of conspiracy theory in modern times. Now, where is conspiracy theory used to be something

you'd have to read about or go here to talk? Now, conspiracy theory is something you can just sit back and watch. Hell yeah, man. Between seamless and postmates and YouTube, I can get my burrito, I can get my handle of Jim Beam, and I can sit and slug it all back while I watch a 45-year-old man who should be with his children.

Explain to me why we live in a diamond universe. Well, furthermore, these videos have the added bonus of hearing someone speak in a voice that sounds good. It's like a voice of authority, and those voices convince thousands, if not millions, that the Earth is flat. So here's a sampling of some flat Earth YouTube channels. Flat Earth Frank. Love him.

Parable of the vineyard. Oh. Jesus Freak Computer Geek. Really? Hell yeah. I bet he's got a cool wheelchair. Why wouldn't he? And the best, glow busters.

Hell yeah. You know what I like about glow busters? I mean, my mind, I guess let's just imagine a woman in high heels, this is like a series of videos, just like kicking guys in the nuts, like one guy with a fucking Nixon mask on, another guy with a Reagan mask on, another guy with a Garfield mask on,

and it's just like, and now here's another episode of Glow Busters, and she kicks him in the nuts, and he goes, ooh. And that's it. Honestly, you just sold a show. Why didn't this come up in any of our pitch meetings? And also, we're not going to be playing clips from any of these YouTube channels,

because I mean, Ben, did you try to watch any of these? I've watched this stuff for a little while now. It's fascinating. Well, it's fascinating, but it's also long, droning stream of consciousness snooze vests. But that's what makes it, I think, in the minds of a lot of people authentic, because they're like, if they were lying,

at least it would be exciting. Like when people talk about reptilians, when you watch David Ike, he's actually pretty entertaining. Well, they do that all the time. They believe a wall of facts is what shows why they are correct and everyone is wrong. I watched this guy do this presentation about gyroscopes, where he had a gyroscope that he bought,

and he showed the box where he bought it, and he's like, and it says here, why? It has been adjusted to nine millimeters of gyroscopic tension. I'd like to see the government get anything close to that. And this gyroscope here, it should be able to be in any position always upright.

And he just does this point, and the gyroscope makes no sense, and then he just shows a wall of mathematical formulas that also makes no sense. That means nothing. Yeah, and they also sometimes have their own math. Like they don't even use accepted math. One of the big things is vortex math.

What's that? Vortex math. It's math that doesn't make any sense. They say that vortex math proves the fingerprint of God. Well, I will say math that doesn't make any sense is what I call math, but that's interesting. Well, part of it, as I understand, is that they believe that scientists and quote, unquote,

elites that use their so-called math and science are bigger and better than them. And they don't like hearing it from them. They think that they think that they are better than them because they went to school to learn how to do math and science. And so they say, well, they make up math. I can make up math, too. And I want to see the gyroscope quiver with my own eyes

because I bought this gyroscope. And I already opened the box, so I can't return it. OK. All right, I get it. Yeah, and these people, they got all kinds of fun names for us. You got Globers, Globeheads, Globetards. You're making me mad. Baldtards.

And not surprisingly, given the conspiratorial nature of all of this, Globe Cooks. Which one of those people are Jimmy Buffett fans? That's what I want to know. I'd call them Globeheads. Globe Cooks is kind of like, I mean, I can see that also being another channel altogether. I've got Globusters on one side,

and I've got Globe Cooks on the other side, where it's just men watching bucks make love to their wife but just layered over a big yoga ball painted like the planet Earth. Man, the Spice Channel has really gone downhill. Who's in charge of programming over here? Spice Channel was a pornographic network for people who don't know that. Back in the 90s. It was a wonderful channel.

Thank you, Uncle Ben. No problem. Everyone's having fun at Easter at your house. And concerning Globe Cooks, it's interesting that some Flat Earthers have adopted a version of Pepe the Frog as their mascot. They call him Fepe, which stands for Flat Earth People Everywhere.

Okay. And this is not surprising at all, because it's rare that Flat Earth is the only conspiracy these people subscribe to. For a lot of them, the road to Flat Earth is paved with dozens of other conspiracy theories. Okay. Again, the writer of the New Yorker article, Alan Burdick,

said he overheard people talking about Pizzagate, Sandy Hook, and other supposed false flag mass shootings more than a few times at the Flat Earth Conference he attended last year. Okay. Wait a second. Let me go to my closet. I need to put my surprised hat on to continue the rest of the show.

I can't continue. But I get it. I mean, I understand the conspiratorial view on some level, because I like the idea of looking deeper into things, into society. I understand that. I feel like obviously we're now seeing the damage

that conspiracy theories like Pizzagate and the idea that Sandy Hook was a false flag shooting, like all of that, we see the damage that does. But a part of it's like, it's just so strange to go to this like very, very bottom level, where I don't even believe

that I'm standing on something that anyone can understand, which I, maybe they're correct, but I don't know. I don't know. I mean, I was reading the Bill Cooper book that you guys interviewed the guy on the Patreon. Like, I've been reading his book. It's fucking great.

Yeah, Pale Horsewriter. It's great. Yeah, Pale Horsewriter. It's awesome. But he quoted Bill Cooper, of course Bill Cooper, the father of modern conspiracy. He quoted some of the Bill Cooper said that really made me think about these flat earthers,

that Bill Cooper, some of you would say on almost every episode, he would say, listen to everyone, read everything, and believe nothing, other than what you can prove with your own research. Okay.

Which I do believe is correct, but when your research is, my eyeballs don't see a curvature, then that's like, that's what's hard. It's hard. I understand. But he also says a very interesting thing later on, where Bill Cooper said, I'm not trying to discover

what is right or what's wrong. I'm trying to investigate what is driving us insane. Yeah. Which I think now is a very prescient thing, because what we're saying, it feels like the culture of the United States is kind of fraying. Right?

The things are really, really chaotic. And stuff like this really throws an UNO wild card into the middle of all that. Nothing like getting that UNO wild card, I will say. But the one issue with it is science, you do have to trust the scientist

that came before you, and that's kind of how you build what we have today. Yeah. So there is a little bit of a flaw in the logic. There's definitely a flaw in the logic. And in speaking of that, it was something that Henry said to me when we were talking about this a couple of days ago,

is that flat earth, many times, is so logical, it's stupid. I mean, it's straight to the heart of logic. Because it's straight up just streaming like, I don't believe any of this. They see the CGI, they did this really extended CGI imagining of what our solar system looks like, right?

And it shows the sun wildly spinning. And it shows the track of the earth wildly spinning. Then it cuts to a side view of the sun traveling through space with all of the planets cycling around it. It looks like a big drill with all these different kind of threads going around it. And it's cool as shit. But for me, when I watched that,

I'm like, wow, that's raw on spaceship earth sliding through the galaxy, doing stuff. But to them, they're like, no. No, I ain't spinning. I ain't spinning. Oh, because they don't feel like they're spinning. Yeah, they don't feel like they're spinning. And we'll definitely get into that

as far as how flat earth, like how it's a sav, it's a comfort to a lot of people. But we'll get into the reasons behind that later. But these people, I mean, Henry talking about, you know, the fraying of the American consciousness, these people are already primed for the idea that the earth is flat

because, as one guy interviewed at that convention said, if they're lying to us about everything else, of course they would lie to us about this. I see. Because this is the end of the road with conspiracy theory. There is nowhere else to go from here. Is there any conspiracy theorist or any flat earth?

Is there any flat earth that's like rational when it comes to pizza gate and Sandy Hook? Yes, yes. Because it's still taking place on earth. You know? We're going to cover those. There's a guy, one of the head of the modern movement is like that.

He says that, like, I'm a reasonable man asking reasonable questions. Okay. It's like he believes in evolution, believes in global warming, although I think he calls it climate change. Okay. But every once in a while you can kind of trip him up

and hear him say global warming. But, you know, he is a fairly rational human being. It's a little bit of both, all right. But what this certainty creates within these flat earthers is something not unlike religion. Because I have never, ever seen people more confident that they're right about something outside of a suicide bomber. Really?

And there is nothing you can say to convince these people otherwise. Do not try arguing with any of them. And there's nothing sadder than an insecure suicide bomber. Because that's just... Why don't I just do it now? I also feel like with... It's also walking around L.A. and seeing people, like the newest and fashion L.A. is essentially just like

soft-clothed street ninja. People dress like with big long sleeves and they look like very comfortable downy bear ninjas. That takes a lot of confidence. It does. Well, for an example, as far as the religious aspect goes, at one flat earth conference, the guy who has the diamond-shaped fourth dimension Pac-Man theory,

he shared what he called a flat earth addiction test during his speech. He asked things like... Have people said that you are pushy or obsessive about flat earth? Count the hands? No, all of you, great. Have you thought that if everyone knew about flat earth, the world would be a different place?

Great. All of you, great. Have you noticed that you spend less and less time with your family and friends and more and more time talking to flat earthers? Love it. Love it, you hear? Love your energy.

So this guy... It sounds like a cult. Well, this guy was reading these questions aloud and the reporter, he's looking around the room sees like everyone's like nodding along with each question. Then at the end, this guy, Nesbitt, who I think was trying to make a joke, revealed that the questions were actually taken from a checklist

used to see if someone was in a cult. Oh my God, that's incredible. But they wear that as a sign of pride. It's kind of like another similar phenomenon that's happening in this country where they take the cult mentality of it because it's a contrarian's contrarian's contrarian society. Yes, right.

It's that everybody else is wrong. I am the only person that holds the secret knowledge and it is correct to me, so it has to be correct ostensibly to all society. So what you're saying is, you know, obviously we've had a couple of laughs at their expense but in reality, they're laughing at us. Yes, yes.

Oh yeah, they absolutely are. I don't think they have much of a choice. Okay. But what's fascinating about this is that although Flat Earth belief has all the hallmarks of a cult, this is a cult that nobody benefits from aside from a handful of YouTube personalities.

Right. There's nobody at the top. The people who do make money are probably more surprised than we are and there sure as fuck ain't any sex involved. And no one's found love in this community? Is that what you're saying? I bet you had to work one time.

A guy found his perfect match or a gal found her perfect match. I think it's sort of similar to, like, maybe me and my last relationship were at some point revealed just how truly deeply I was into UFOs and it became, like, a presence within the relationship where, like, that kind of happens over time,

I imagine. The descent into that level of doubt over all reality, like, does, I think, little pieces. For a while, it's just like, yeah, you know, we kind of used to lose them a lot to video games quite a bit and then Jeb started coming over a lot and they got a lot of protractors

and I had to get rid of all the apples. I bought a bunch of oranges because the kids needed more vitamin C. The doctor said he made me get rid of them unless I cut them into slices. It's the only thing they can have. Right, interesting. It's a real character trait for these people,

all encompassing. Oh, it's more than a character trait. It's their entire personality. Okay. Really, the only benefit that people get from this is that it makes them feel special. Right. But they do have an answer for people

who refer to them as a cult. One of the top names in the Flat Earth World, Daryl Marble, had this to say. Yeah, he did not make that up. No, you can't make it up. I disavowed my last name. I have disavowed my last name since day one.

I should be Daryl Flat. I have said that before. My name going for now is Daryl Manila Folder. This is what Daryl Marble had to say about people who call them a cult. They say we are a cult, but the globe is the biggest cult of all. Are you fucking sheep?

All right. Now, they say the cult that the rest of us belong to is scientism, and they believe that the world would be a much better place without it. Good lord. This is very religious. When you said that because we used to do full-on seminars,

we would go to anti-scient seminars, all the dinosaurs were planted, all that kind of stuff. My god, are they the same kind of folks? They are. Do they fly in planes? Yeah, they do. Yes, they do, buddy. And they have a whole explanation

of how and why planes work because you have to understand, pilots and air traffic controllers are also receiving the lies. So they're also being lied to about what they're actually doing, they don't know, which is why planes, there's only a north and south sea

to the gigantic Pangea, the UN map that is the actual world. And so they just fly them bit, bit, around these little fucking little semi-circulars and tell them to go on straight. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And speaking of it, it's funny that you bring up planes with Daryl Marble

because Daryl Marble is famous in the flat earth world for being the level guy, because he flew up in an airplane and he brought a level with him, and it didn't change, he was level the whole time. He's on a plane. Yeah, but look at that, but look at it.

It's level the whole time. They didn't do the reading about a thing called the theory of relativity, but even if they did it, they would say it's a Zionist conspiracy. Which is very difficult. If we're at this level, if we're already at this level of DEFCON 5,

in terms of like, we're not going to have much of a conversation about the nature of the planet earth. I just, of course, they got to Zionism at some point. Can I just ask this question? What's the problem if the world is flat? Why would someone lie and say it's round? What's the difference? Well, it's a very...

I'm just saying, what's the big benefit? We'll get into it. We'll absolutely get into it. Some people say there is a reason behind it. Some people, like the guy we're about to talk about, Samuel Robotham, he says there is no reason. Now, this was the first,

this was like the beginning guy, right, Samuel Robotham? Samuel Robotham. So let's get into some of the top personalities of flat earth, beginning way back in 1838 with Samuel Robotham. Now, one of history's greatest misconceptions is that people believe that the earth was flat up until relatively recently,

when Columbus sailed the ocean blue in 1492. Yeah, of course, that's not true. Humans have known the earth was round as far back as the sixth century BC, and it's been a generally accepted fact for the last 2000 years. Very few people seriously thought that the earth was flat if they even thought about the shape of the earth at all.

Yeah. The first person in modern times to argue about the shape of the earth was a man named Samuel Robotham. Robotham would travel to various universities in England and lecture on his theory for the meager sum of six pints per talk. Not bad.

Of course, going up against other academics didn't always go his plan, and after he couldn't explain why the hull of the ship disappeared before the mast in one lecture, he just ran away. He just ran away. He just like a squid. He was like, he's shot come.

He's like, they'll never see me in my clouds and ran away. It was hard because the Bedford level experiment now is still the thing they whip out saying this was the first thing that showed that the earth is flat. But there's a lot of science stuff in there that they're disregarding. Stuff like air's a liquid.

Sort of like an air liquid. This is me even saying it, and I'm not even sure of the math. But I know there's a lot of stuff in between what me sees with me eyeballs and how reality is because my brain is making it all up anyway. All right. Are you? How are you, Henry?

Are you doing OK? It gets you in a circular loop of thought. Yeah. That is just degrading my everyday life. I see. Robotham hues all sorts of what he thought to be scientific experiments to prove that the earth was indeed flat.

All right. But like all these guys, the experiments only held up so long as the observer either didn't think about it too hard or was just happy something scientific was explained in a way that made them feel smart. OK, I get it. Yeah, of course. It makes you feel good.

Oh, I understand that. That makes total sense. Now I'm smart, and the guys up there in their ivory towers, they're the stupid ones. They're the dumb ones. Yeah. Yeah, there's not even an elevator invented yet. They're walking all up those stairs trying to go to bed.

I just fall asleep right here on the ground. Look at that. Everywhere is my bed when I got a jug of wine. That's the best part about science that led me to discover the powers of wine and how any garden can be your home. These days, flat earthers use all sorts of techniques to prove their theories.

One of them is they just shine a flashlight on a coin in front of a globe and say, look at that. I don't do nothing because that is most of the time the extent of their proof is, look at that. What does it show? Shining a flashlight on a coin by a globe? It's something about the moon, I think. It's either something about the moon or the sun.

But the thing about many flat earthers is that for a lot of them, the only thing that matters is what they can concretely see. OK. Because they've never seen the Earth from the outside with their own eyes. Nope. But they have seen the Chicago skyline from 50 miles away on a clear day, which, by their calculations,

should be impossible if the Earth was round. Because if the Earth was round, the elevation would keep dropping and dropping and dropping, and we wouldn't be able to see it from 50 miles away. Therefore, the Earth is flat. But what about the scale of the globe and all that stuff? Therefore, the Earth is flat. All right.

You're being a real globe cook right now. I'm not being a globe cook. And watch your wife being made love to buy a planet. Oh, my goodness. I can't deal with all that. I mean, because you're asking the wrong questions, because if there's any question that you have that comes down to the scale of the globe itself,

it doesn't matter because you can't see the globe. You've never seen the globe. They've never seen the globe. In fact, this is what one YouTuber quoted in Burdick's article wrote. It simply comes down to, hey, have you been there? Hmm? Have you been to Saturn?

Have you been to Jupiter? Science is really an excuse for people to be stupid. You know, I have never, I've never had a grasshopper. Well, I actually haven't eaten a grasshopper. I had one of those barbecue flavors. But there's a series of things that exist that I have not seen that I trust exist. No, there was one video was watching where a guy was just

saying height doesn't exist. Yeah. And I was like, well, what do you mean? Like in my, that's why I asked myself, I actually probably said this out loud. My family has now heard me scream at the videos quite a bit while watching them inside the house. But a part of it, it's like, look at that.

When you're watching that plane tick off from that one way, right? It doesn't look like that. It looks like it's really high coming off that. Wow, look at that. How high it is. Well, when I get close, that'll look high. Height's not real.

Honestly, I'm going to start saying that when people ask me how tall I am, like, height's not real and that they're going to know my flat earther, and I gain a friend. Well, their argument is that since the earth looks flat, the burden of proof is on everyone else to prove that it's round. Okay.

Problem is, no matter what you say, flat earthers have a conspiratorial answer for everything. Is there anything you could say? No, nothing. Nothing. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I ain't fat from drinking beer. That's water retention.

The government gave to me by putting it in the water. They put water retention pills in the water itself which got filtered into the beer. They put water in the beer. They put water in the beer. Now, say you show them photos from space and say, look, the earth is clearly a globe. We've got thousands of pictures of the earth from space.

Right. But according to them, every single photo taken by space, by anyone, whether it's NASA, the Russians, or the ISS, it's a fraud. It's nothing more than photo manipulation. Well, because they don't under, it's not that they, I hate using the term don't understand. It's that they refuse to acknowledge that when we,

when you take pictures at an object that's moving at a high speed from another, not stable, they would think it's also moving at a high speed. Again, I'm not a scientist. What a part of it is that when it, you have to patch the pictures together to get the entire globe. You get sections of it at a time.

Right. But you're also moving, it's a whole thing. Yeah. It takes time and they got to put it all together to make the picture look right in order for you to see all of it like it's a plane. And they take that because they do have people that are artistic directors at NASA,

they take that as they are lying about everything, that they are, that's where the moon landing being fake came in where it's like, you have all these guys engineering what we see, which is like, they are, but they're not. They're just engineering, they're engineering it so we can see it. Well, you know what?

Now, just for the sake of artists, I hope that that's true. Where is all the money going NASA? Meanwhile, just cut to a graphic designer wearing gold shoes and gold pants. Just be like, it's all coming to me. Unfortunately, I can't move due to the stiff nature of the metal, but I do enjoy how expensive they are.

Speaking of NASA, and NASA stands for what, Henry? Never a straight answer from these fucking lion scientists. The entire space program is fake as well. Some say that the whole thing was just a Cold War illusion because faking space exploration is much cheaper than actually going to space. But others say that NASA is really a gigantic

money laundering operation controlled by who else but the Freemasons and people of the Jewish persuasion. Oh, it got there. It finally got there. How many pages, because I haven't looked at the websites, how many pages in until you get to the Zionist agenda exactly? I'm going to give them credit and say, it's an eight paragraph deep.

You got it, you're already in a little bit, and then you go, oh, like once you get there, like I knew it. Interesting. You could see, which also makes no sense because they wear flat discs on their head. To me, a Jewish person would be Yama, because the ultimate symbol of the flat earth

because you got, it's like a thing on their head. No, that's a rounded thing. It's a rounded disc. And if anything, it points towards them being rounders. Is that what they call people who believe the earth is round? Rounders, globe heads, glovers, globe cucks, globe cards, balltards. Cool.

I love it. Honestly, NASA though, they are funneling money to the space force. This is true. This is not conspiracy. The space force is already being funded by NASA. Space war is next. Great.

Wonderful. Kent, looking forward to it. No problem. Well, speaking of people of the Jewish persuasion, this is a little bit of information about them in the words of one YouTuber. NASA is Hebrew for to deceive. And who speaks Hebrew?

There's your answer. I made you say it. I didn't say it. I made you say it. I don't like the way that that happens. That's not right at all. Also, people who speak Hebrew, maybe someone who wants to learn more than one language.

Well, apparently this guy's YouTube chat, which we're actually going to hear from this guy later. But he's one of those who's like, NASA's Hebrew for to deceive. And who speaks Hebrew? There's your answer. There's your answer. He's one of those douchebags that talks really fast and thinks that it makes him smart.

Right. But Rachel's boyfriend, Rachel, which is my research assistant, thank you very much, Rachel. You were invaluable on this episode. But her boyfriend actually speaks Hebrew. And he watched some of this guy's videos. And so he said, this guy doesn't know how to fucking speak Hebrew.

Of course, does he speak Hebrew? It's like he was writing all the shit backwards and none of it made any sense. And actually NASA is a Hebrew word. It's N-A-S-S-E-H, but it means to carry. OK, hold on a second. So this guy talks about NASA meaning to deceive. You know, who speaks Hebrew.

And then why didn't he just end it with this guy? Because apparently he does. Is that what's happening? This is all very confusing stuff. Yes. It's interesting. Yeah, we're trying to lay it out as simply as we possibly can. But astronauts, those are Freemasons too.

And they're totally in on it. They know that nothing's real. But most NASA employees don't know that nothing's real because they've all been compartmentalized. And anyway, they're all just Satanists and Luciferians. Can I just ask a question? What about the Challenger? Henry, you want to take that one?

The Challenger explosion was faked in order to make you feel sympathy for astronauts. Yeah. That's how deep it goes. Oh my God. So where did they go? Why did they just come back then? They are alive and well.

And I'll show you the YouTube video where it shows several people that look vaguely like the members of the Challenger team that are now slightly older. Oh my God. They say that they're hiding in plain sight. Oh, OK. They have a hard time dealing with reality, it seems like. Well, that kind of goes with a lot of conspiracy theory.

Oh yes, very much so. And by the way, NASA, they do actually have a job. It's not just fakery and smoke and mirrors. That job isn't what you think it is. Their real job is to guard the Arctic Circle, the ice sheet that surrounds the entire Flat Earth. That's what Antarctica is. And their job is to prevent anyone from climbing over

and falling into the unknown, or just climbing over, peeking over the ice wall, seeing nothing, and reporting back the truth to the rest of us. They are very, very expensive lifeguards. Right, so we got a border, we got a border ice wall around the globe. That's what Antarctica is. And then I'm pretty sure the Simpsons covered this

when Homer went to the real world. Is that what they think was happening? And also, if that is the case, why wouldn't we be exploring that? It has to be someone being like, give me a snorkel, I'm jumping over. Maybe they are, and we just don't know about it. It's a grand lie, man. Do you think Donald Trump Jr. just goes

and parties in New York all the time? No. What? These are the kind of things that he does as the son of the president. I don't think so, but maybe. Well, let's get back to Samuel Roboth. Okay.

Now, after he performed multiple experiments, far too boring and complicated to go into here, he released a pamphlet called Zetetic Astronomy under the pseudonym Parallax. It's pretty cool. He went full on, somehow he jumped into 1994 and pulled the name right out of hackers. Awesome.

He followed that in 1864 with a book that has come to be The Foundation of Modern Flat Earth Theory. It is called Zetetic Astronomy. Earth, not a globe. Not a globe. Well, it's written by Parallax, the guy who sounds like an anti-diarrhea medicine. So I'm going to open this.

I'm going to open my mind. I'll have to give a little bit of read to that. Research assistant Rachel found some wonderful Amazon reviews for Zetetic Astronomy. Earth, not a globe. Great book tells the truth that the Earth is not a chaotic spinning globe planet, but is indeed an ordered stable level plane.

Okay. Screaming added to indicate all caps. Here's the next one. Wow. This book will make you think about the shape of our Earth and also gives many a truth where modern quote-unquote scientists choose to twist and lie to fit their quote-unquote agenda.

Great book! Whoa. And just one more. Timeless truth. Thank you. Wake up public to the fact that Mickey Mouse is not your god. He's just another rat. And a rat is a rat by any name.

NASA in its Nazi force has hoodwinked everyone, even though it's also run by the Jews. They're also pathetic liars and as well as traitors. Read this book! Okay. First of all, the biggest issue I have out of all of that is Mickey Mouse is a mouse, not a rat, which is in the name, which is crazy.

She doesn't even believe Mickey Mouse is a mouse. He looks like a mouse. Rat is a rat by any other name, even if you call him a mouse. Oh, good lord. But Mickey Mouse is viewed as our god, is a very interesting. That is such an old school holdover. Yeah. It's like the idea of corpotocracy and shit where it's like,

we've already allowed that to happen. It's called the phone you're handing, you have in your hand. Right. And the device you're listening to this on and the thing you use at work. It's already happened. The corpotocracy has already taken its place.

It's done. But they still say it's Mickey Mouse being president. Interesting. Okay. And so, and now she was saying the Nazis were behind it. So we have kind of dueling narratives going on. We have dueling narratives. Yeah, yeah.

The space force, NASA is full of Nazis, and yet it's also Jewish at the same time. It's not hate slash love more than a Jew pretending to be a Nazi, or a Nazi pretending to be a Jew, whoever's got the good science that runs this country. Interesting. So if I really did want to go have a good debate, I could say we all agree the earth is flat,

but is it Nazis or is it folks who are Jewish? And then perhaps that could get something going in the room. I mean, that's what Flat Earth conferences are all about. Okay. What happens is that they have a villain that they believe in that's sort of like, was it a James Bond villain whose head turns around, he's got multiple faces?

Who is that? Was that he, man? I think that was he, man. I think you're thinking of, no, you're not thinking of man-at-arms. I think you're thinking of just like, I think his name's just multi-face or something. Something like that.

But instead, it's just a mechanical yarmulke that flips with a switch that's got a swatze to go on the other side of it. Oh my goodness. According to the reviews, this book is pretty math heavy, but couched in all that math is the foundation of Flat Earth theory. Okay. The Bible. So one of the questions posed by Robotham

and is repeated ad nauseam today is this. Why is water flat? Wait, water. Why ask the question, Kissel? Well, water is, as Bruce Lee said, be water. Fit into anything. Water is no consistency. Water is whatever you put it in.

Water is flat. Yeah, no, water's actually round. Like, but you know, you look at you look at do on a leaf and that water's round because it's a bubble. Yeah, they get a little round. Yeah, bubbles. If it comes off, if it's coming off the leaf. I thought water was made out of waves.

I thought it was a bunch of waves. I thought it was like a Neapolitan cake or something with a bunch of layers, like a phyllo dough, like a baklava. Yeah. My deli just started selling baklava and I had one. Pretty good. Now Robotham answers this by quoting Psalms as thus, Oh, give thanks to the Lord of lords that by wisdom made the heavens

and that stretched out the earth above the waters. I don't understand, why does that make it flat? Then there's this one from Isaiah. He sits enthroned above the circle of the earth and its people are like grasshoppers. He stretches out the heavens like a canopy and spreads them out like a tent to live in. Earth's flat. Is it possible that the people that wrote the Bible didn't know the earth was round? I think it's possible that the Bible is just a collection of poetry meant to inspire

and not necessarily literal facts. Yeah. But I don't know. Honestly, I don't know anymore. Well, I got a bumper sticker that says otherwise, my friend. I have one that says co-exist, but in all the symbols. Well, you have a Prius. I think it comes with a Prius, doesn't it?

Yeah. And finally, there's this one from Matthew. Again, the devil took him to a very high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and their splendor because, see, the devil wouldn't be able to do that if the earth was round. Oh. Okay. All right. So these are the Bible verses that he, this is definitive proof in the minds of this man,

in the mind of this man. These are only three of dozens that Flat Earthers have since plucked out to show, like, look, the Bible says that the earth is flat. You can take this statement from the Bible and it implies the earth is flat. Okay. So, therefore, the earth is flat. A robothem was also the first to suggest the Antarctica Icewall theory. So if you want an idea of how the round earth gets turned into flat earth,

just imagine cutting a hole in the middle of Antarctica down at the bottom and then you peel the whole map off of the globe, the whole map of the earth. Right. You put that flat on a table and you get flat earth. But what about, it's like an orange peel, though, when they actually do that, then you've got all the little ridges in there and stuff, all the big ones. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. What do they feel that in there?

This is far more conceptual. This is far more conceptual. You're doing the thing. You're taking it literal. It's flapping in it. It's more like, oh, man. It's like if you wrap a blanket around a dead body. That's the shape of a sphere.

And then you unfold the blanket back out to be in flat. Right. Okay. But then you look at that and you think, well, how do they do transcontinental flights? How do they do sea travel? Well, the simple answer is, they don't do them. At least not the way that we see it. You never been on one, man.

You never went in the sky, man. The way it's set up, the Pacific Ocean is just the northern ocean. So you can just kind of say you want to go from LA to Beijing. Okay. You just fly up north and then you just curve around and then you come back down. Okay. But pilots don't know that because the people who run the GPS, they're in on it too. And all the sea captains of your liars.

Okay. Bull of shit. You can't believe a sailor, whatever he says. What about like a plane crash and then everyone dies? Like what happened to Leonard Skinner? Not everyone died, but really the core of the band did. Yeah. How does that happen then?

Why would they die if they're plane crashes? Oh, yeah. I mean, planes still crash. They weren't high. No, no, no. They are high. They are high. They're high up in the air.

Yeah. Okay. Do you know that type of the plane? Do you know that time when you're in the middle of a flight? It's every single time. When the pilot comes on, it's like, all right, everybody. We're here cruising at 35,000 feet. Now it's time for everybody to clap and believe in flight.

And if you don't clap, the plane will crash. And so if they were too busy playing music stuff, not hearing the announcement, they don't clap in the middle of it. Right. Yeah. Yeah. The planes are only about 3,000 miles up. And instead of 93 million miles, like we've been told, the sun actually is.

And the sun and the moon, they just rotate around above us. And then we just kind of switch. We all stay in the same place, but the sun and the moon rotate around above us. And concerning eclipses, those are caused by an invisible celestial object called the anti-moon. What the hell is that? It's the anti-moon. No one's really sure.

No one's really sure. Well, what's stopping the Earth, you know, because obviously they don't believe in gravity. Why doesn't it fall? We'll get into that. OK. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll definitely get into that. Well, this is also just one model of the flat Earth idea.

Yeah. Two. This is one of the original models, which they felt was more scientific than what will happen later on. Is it fair to say this is your go-to model? I think that I would say this is a go-to model. Yeah. This is the first one.

And it's one that people like to point back to again and again, but the thing is about and then again with like the flat Earth theory is that like it's kind of like religion. It is whatever you want to say it is. OK. Like you can believe in anything you want to believe. Now even though all of this sounds like super simplistic and it's the sort of thing that most people even in the 1860s would scoff at, just know that all these beliefs persist to this day in the form of YouTube videos.

Did some of those YouTube videos got over 10 million views? Wow. We are doing it wrong. So unbelievable. But it's got a lot of coverage in recent years, which is a part of the reason why the 10 million views I think are there is that ironically it's been covered again and again where people have come and have laughed at them. They've watched it ironically, but also a part of that irony and a part of the laughter

at it is what's actually driven the other side of the movement to fight even harder for their legitimacy because again, like in many cults now that we've actually had it spelled in front of us that the Flat Earth movement is similar to a cult, that idea of persecution validates what they believe. Right. It seems like it's like, I don't know, did you guys see that clip of Kawhi Leonard laughing? No. It was quite hilarious because they immediately get serious.

It's one of those where you're laughing and then your brain is like, you're on TV and then you stop laughing. I wonder if people watch that as a lark initially and by the time they sit through the whole thing, maybe they're convinced. Yeah. You don't know. I mean, that's the point of all this, is that there's no way to tell how many of those 10 million views are people watching it ironically, people watching it curiously, and how many

actually fall for it. We have no idea. And of course there's one guy who is counted for 50,000 views, it's just a repeat nonstop on his computer. I'm close to it. We watch quite a bit of this today, but the thing is they're just so long. Yeah. They're very long.

Each one's like four hours long and each one has stuff, and you have to explain to me why the moon landing was fake, and then you have to explain to me why evolutions aren't real. And I'm just like, I know, but just get to the flat earth part at least. Yeah. And speaking of not knowing whether people believe in this shit or not, it's speculated that Samuel Roebotham, the father of modern flat earth theory, never believed in flat earth at all.

What? And only did it for the money. Yeah. I mean, whether he did it or not. Wait a second. I have to put my surprise hat back on. I took it off for a second. Yeah.

There were multiple friends that came out after he died and they're like, yeah, he never believed in that shit. Oh my. So he just did a terrible disservice to science for money? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Of course he did.

And he also married a 16-year-old girl at the age of 45, and then he had 14 kids, and yeah. This guy is blowing my mind. And then he continued publishing the Earth Not a Globe review until his death in 1884. Honestly, you're looking at kid number 11 and you're like, ah, better go back to the college. Like, you got to make money if that's how you're making money. Yeah.

You got to do. Yeah. You got to put butts in seats. And also, we're looking at an incredible Sacha Baron Cohen movie. Yeah. That should be done. Oh, yeah. Now, while a few of his followers continued this tradition with a journal called Earth,

a monthly magazine of science and sense, it didn't take long for another huckster to pick up where Robotham left off. That man was Wilbur Glenn Veliva. Cool. Veliva, by putting the Bible up front and flat Earth as supporting proof of its veracity, he managed to convince the entire town of Zion, Illinois to believe in the flat Earth by couching the belief in evangelical Christianity. I see.

Veliva believed that the world was besieged by what he called the trinity of evils, evolution, historical criticism of the Bible, and modern astronomy. In other words, he was a literalist in all things. It's so hard if you view all of life as just that. That's got to be, like, puts you in such a place, like you are the villain of the whole, you're anti-everything anybody ever understands. It's a lonely position to have. Right.

And the trinity of evils is another thing that gets brought up quite a bit. I was watching a pastor do a big sermon about the Earth being flat. And they also say the top three evils. Three evils come up all the time, which is, ball or theory leads to believing in evolution, leads to believing in the Big Bang. They hate the Big Bang. They hate all of this stuff, and the idea that we came from monkeys and the whole thing. But what about if the Big Bang just made a flat Earth?

But that's it. They don't like that. Yeah, they don't like that at all. So they don't go back in their head and be like, but where did it all come from? They don't go that far back? Well, let's get in a little bit until the reasoning behind the religious connection here. Okay. I believe that the Earth and only the Earth was created for humans and that to believe

that the Earth was round or even that the stars or anything but an illusion was ungodly and would earn you a ticket straight to hell. The basic idea of this, that the Earth and only the Earth exists and then God made it especially for us is extremely common in the flat Earth community. And actually, I think tells us a lot about them. Yes. Because if you believe in flat Earth, then that means that you were nowhere near as small as you would be if the entire universe existed.

Oh. If you believe in flat Earth, your existence is now infinitely larger than it was before in a very literal sense. You also, if you view God as a direct parent in your life, right, in this idea that God is right there. It's like, you know, like when you go to, I went to theater school and it was nice, but theater schools at the classes were smaller. So you got more direct attention from the teacher.

Right. Imagine that, but it's God. The idea is that instead of having an entire universe for God to look after, it's this little circle that he made filled with each one of us, handcrafted, lovingly painted like a pedophile, Hummel figurine creator, each stroke of his tiny brush was there and he felt it. And we can bask in God's love and we're a part of, and we are the only person he's concerned with.

And you could see how like, oh, that would make you feel really important. Yeah. Absolutely. So we're on center stage. And that's a big deal. I remember doing open mics at a place called Ochi's Lounge. It was in the basement right by the bathrooms of a comedy club called Comics. Upstairs was quite a good comedy club with a bunch of seats in it.

It's where I started out. And I remember talking to the open micers, this must have been 11 years ago. The club upstairs isn't good. Those shows suck. What we're doing down here, this is where they should be. This is the real show. This is the real show. The one that we had to pay to do.

But yeah, two drink tickets, we got one of those. That's cool. Yeah. You know like that fun fact that if you smell a shit smell coming from a bathroom, it's got a bunch of shit particles in your nose from a stranger? It's like that. But it's also a comedy show. Oh, great.

Awesome. Now personally, I think the modern resurgence of Flat Earth Theory is just another symptom of the Western world's obsession with fame. See, I think for many, just being insignificant on Earth is bad enough. And if you add the infinite reaches of space, that insignificance can become unbearable because we've all been taught that we have to be significant. And in modern times, being significant means being famous. I gotta say, I love just being in...

I love the idea of space. It makes you feel like better in my opinion. Me too. That's how I think of it. And it's also, it's fame. It's fame. But for attention, especially here in Los Angeles, you could see in the middle of pilot season how Flat Earth, that theory could be really popular because, you know, they're

just not calling. And you're staring at the phone waiting for them to call. No one's doing it. And you're just starting to sweat. And you start to wonder, do I exist? Am I a ghost? So I could see that, how that would be very attractive. I also think it's an inherent lack of meaning.

Part of what we live with every day is the weight that on some construct of our brain, in order for us to feel truly comfortable, we have to believe in something or have something we can hang our hat on. And a part of this idea of being a special creature of God, I mean, part of what I understand is that if you want to believe that whatever, but you can believe in that and believe that the earth is ground and believe that they're aliens and shit, because I thought God was like everywhere. Right.

I know they put it in the nug. That's what Josh said. And I am sure, and of course, to Claire, if you are, no very few Christians believe the earth is flat. Yes. Very, very few. No, no, no, no, no. It's not like a universal theme of books.

No, of course not. But you know, I mean, the thing is about this, is that if the world you live in, or the world that you believe you live in is finite, and you get the added bonus of being even more special because you quote unquote know something that the majority of people on earth don't, then you get to feel both more secure and extra smug about your own existence. Dude, that's the full, that's the full Yachty, man. Yeah. You get that whole shit.

You get to both, you get secret knowledge that only, you know, because it's like when you get to the end of Scientology and all of a sudden they're spring and zeno on you. It's that you're like, no, but they're, yeah, yeah, it's strange idea of flat earth. But isn't life strange? And it's like this kind of concept that you really believe, right, the most fact factual and logical way to look at earth is that it is a flat plane suspended in nothing. There is nothing but a cartoonish flat plane with a tapestry of stars and the sun and the moon flowing above it, like a rainbow, like an old school like picture, like from folklore.

And you believe that that is real, or you're one of these new quote unquote science flat earthers that believe it's a disk flying through space. And it's just, it's very interesting. It's so trippy. It's very Michelle Gondry. Yeah. In my mind. It seems like they all want to be Jim Carrey from the Truman Show, perhaps, although I want

to say Jim Carrey didn't like it. Man, you're really, you're picking up on a lot of this stuff because we're getting into that later as well. Oh, good. Yeah. And some of these guys are like, they openly admit to thinking about this finite existence thing as a comfort. You know, when two flat earthers were asked what they thought about people who believe

in infinite space, they said that those people are quote unquote fucking miserable and they couldn't fathom how people live like that. They can't fathom how we live. But what about the exciting world of exploration, Star Trek? Next generation, the only Star Trek that matters to me, that's pretty cool to think about. But are you going to go there? Maybe if I got enough, I don't think I'm going to get approved. I don't know.

You should definitely see for yourself. You would be having a hard time in those cabins on the Enterprise, I imagine. They're all Riker size and Riker was my height. Right. Yeah. I don't think I'd fit. It's also a weird, that's where it gets into the esoteric shit. Where it gets into this idea that we all of a sudden there's a whole alien agenda side

of this bullshit, which is we're on a flat earth, suspended in God's dimension. But the devil, which somehow he is somehow allowed to continue to exist, who fell from the heavens, which is above our diamond, uh, alternate dimension kind of prison, right? The idea is that we're in this floating area. The devil appears as aliens and all that kind of shit to convince us there is space. Because to want to leave the earth means we are choosing to leave God behind, even though there is no space. There's no other stars nor other planets, but the devil appears to us as aliens and

the government works in accordance with the devil to create this fake alien agenda to make us want to go into space, because what that does is chooses us to deny the choices of God. Woo. I feel like the inner workings of a baseball. Do you ever see how that just like circles around it, it's real tight there? All right. Well, for Wilbur Glenn-Veleva, the guy who really hammered all of the Christianity flat

earth stuff home, everything ended in tears. Because by 1927, Veleva had built his followers out of five million dollars, which of course caused quite a bit of resentment after the Great Depression came. I needed to get a new surprise hat because the kind of thing that folded on because part of the surprise hat is that you need like a pretty rigid, like a construction helmet to keep it pretty like tight on my skull, it's really starting to cut the skin around my temples. I'm pretty sure I need one of those hats that have two holders for beers.

I need two straws and I'm out immediately because here's my, here's my anti-surprise juice. Well, Veleva tried to get all of his followers back on his side by hosting the annual Zion Passion Play starting in 1935, but a disgruntled employee took away the venue in 1937 by burning down Veleva's church. Oh, because this isn't a childish play where it's like, oh, we'll put on a show that'll get everybody happy again in the town. Absolutely.

And Marcus, I'm actually thinking it's really unfair how Marcus rejected my first draft of a Zion Passion Play that I was going to read for you today because he said of the controversial nature of some of the characters. I believe it. I believe. I get what you were doing there, Marcus. Oh yeah. Saving the show.

Thank you. Veleva died in 1942 at the age of 72. Despite his claim that he would live till the age of 120 owing to a steady diet of Brazil nuts and buttermilk. Oh, fuck. What was he? Smarts and shit. Honestly.

Question. David Bowie's peppers and milk, buttermilk, and almonds. Oh. What? Rubbed peppers and milk. Yeah. Buttermilk and Brazil nuts. Brazil nuts are, what do you want?

I'm going peppers and milk sprinkled with cocaine. Yeah. Oh, the sprinkle of cocaine. I didn't know that that was an option. Yeah, of course. The peppers of milk led to a low and led to hero, Brazil nuts and buttermilk led to the Zion passion plant that can't ever be read out loud. Buttermilk's pretty good, though.

It's thick. It's a thick milk. Oh, man. Yeah. The ice cream man in my town, he used to drink buttermilk, warm buttermilk, straight from the cart and like 110 degree weather. Oh my, the kid on the back, the missing kid on the back is like, this is worse than being missing.

I hate being so close to this buttermilk and this man's weird lips. He could speak like Georgie in the original bit. Now, you'd think that the idea of the flat earth would died with Boliva, but just a couple decades later, a British man named Samuel Shenton picked it up and ran with it. All right. So for him, everything began with an idea. Yeah. His idea was this.

If the earth was round and constantly spinning, then logically, it followed that a contraption could be built that flies straight up into the sky and just parks there and it lets the earth do the traveling for it. Okay. Now listen, Kissel, I see the look on your face. If a girder fell off of a construction site and just poked its way through your head but you still were alive. You could see how this is a great idea.

I don't know. But think about it. The plane goes up. It stays there. Let the earth do the magic for you because then you save no one guess. There's a lot of stuff in it. It's difficult. There are a lot of moving parts in it in the issue that are difficult for him to understand.

It does seem like it's close. Like he could get gravity. It's a little bit. It's in that. It's so logical. It's dumb. Yeah. Yeah.

So this was a terrible idea that would never work by people who couldn't definitively tell him why it wouldn't work. He reasoned that the only way it wouldn't work was if the earth was flat. Oh man. Because that's the problem is that people just told him, man, that's not going to work. That's not how flight works. That's not how things work. Right.

And he was like, well, why not? And they're like, you know what, man? I don't know. I just know it's not going to work. I just know it's not. And he's like, maybe there's something more here. Well, you know what? Maybe I'm surprised he didn't think of like getting a big finger and then the finger

that goes down and it's like it stops it from spinning. And then the earth doesn't spin anymore. Why can't we just do that? I was thinking of a new way to eat where I take a bunch of spaghetti. I do a lie on my back and I have this machine just tip the plate over here at the bottom of my lip. So the spaghetti just hits my teeth and gravity does all the eating for me. I think that's one of the failed inventions from the dad in Honey I Shrunk the Kids.

I'm pretty sure that was in there. So after doing what Samuel said was days of research, which days, mostly involved just reading Earth Not a Globe, Samuel Shinton founded the Flat Earth Research Society. This is about 1957. Now the thing is about Shinton is that he was just a regular dude who painted signs for a living. But it's really not that weird because it seems like this guy, he's kind of like the proto version of the guy at the bank who seems nice and mild mannered until he overhears

you talking about reptilians. And that's when he comes by and tells you what's really going on. And people think that Marcus is just saying that, but that happened to Henry Zabroski. It happened to a man by a man named Dick Bunch. Chase Bank Manager who told me, we heard us all talking about UFOs and he's like, are you young boys are talking about UFOs? We're like, we're 29. But yeah, we were talking about UFOs.

He's like, well, do you know about the secret schools that run this world? I was like, hmm, yeah, I do. He's like, but do you know about the connection between the healing agenda and the secret schools that run this world? And I was like, as a matter of fact, I do. And we started an uneasy friendship that lasted about a week until he started texting me. Yeah.

And then I go send him. Yeah. And of course that was the conversation ended with saying, oh, my lunch break is over. I've got to go back to being a manager at Chase Bank, which is in Manhattan, my money is safe. It's at Chase Bank. Everyone's normal. That works there.

At least they're sane. And after the Flat Earth Society was launched, Sputnik, the first ever satellite, was launched as well. And you'd think that this would prove once and for all that the Earth was in fact round. You fucking rubes. What? But in a response that launched a million denials, Shitten emphatically stated that there was no other explanation other than fakery.

And even if the satellite took photos, the Earth only appeared round because they were probably using a fisheye lens. I watched the movie when the Russians tried to recreate Everybody Loves Raymond. And they are not nearly good enough at cinematography to pull this off. Well, this is the first time we're going to hear this defense, too, and then it becomes the go-to response for any footage that happens outside of this planet. That it is a Photoshop, and he says you can't believe it. And he just immediately attacks it and the fisheye lens, fisheye lens is constantly being

brought up because it makes things look curved. Yeah. I mean, this isn't a flaming lips video. What is happening? It's Beastie Boys. Oh. Those were the ones that really used it and part of those shills. The fisheye lens.

More like shill shot. Not bad. Not bad. That lens was used in a lot of music videos, too. Well, Shinton was the first person in the public eye to truly denounce the entire space program as a total fraud, going on TV interviews as a curiosity and publishing his opinions in his newsletter. See if you get it.

The plain truth. See. Do you get it? Yes. Well, it's kind of triple because a plane is flat. So we have it like that. We also have plane that flies, and then we also have the plain truth. Like he's like a Bill Engvold character.

Here's your sign. That's the plain truth. I mean, he's just a corn-pwn full-on salt of the earth man who's just telling it like it is. I don't know why people are so mad. Honestly, the triple pun is pretty hard to pull off. I'm going to give him credit for that. Oh, yeah.

Now, he was also among the first to proclaim that the moon landing was all staged. And while we can't really go into the specifics right now, rest assured, we're going to do a fake moon landing episode, because that is an entire episode all on its own. That's a big, big subject. Marcus, why don't we go back to the moon? That's what they keep asking. Why don't we go? I mean, honestly, the moon landing is kind of sad when you think about it because they

got up there, planted the flag, and they're like, huh, nothing here, and then why would we ever go back? Why don't we go back though? Now, as far as what the motivations for pushing a round-earth agenda actually are, qui bono, if you will. Shitten had this to say to the Birmingham Post in 1966. I can only account for the delusion of having been introduced by Satan and to the minds of certain men who could inoculate those others with the poison, his object of being making

the peer that God is a liar, and the before the human race, which he so appores. Whew, that's an interesting article in the Birmingham Post. All right. Well, Shitten died less than a decade later in 1971, but before he did, he passed the Flat Earth Torch to Charles K. Johnson, who once again emphasized the Bible. Now, he gained some followers, but for the most part, the whole thing had fizzled by the new millennium. But this time, it would only lay dormant for a few years before Daniel Shitten, no relation

to Samuel Shitten, died here. How many Shittons are there in the UK? I don't know. Is it that common of a name? No, this is a, there was a, Samuel Shitten was, he was British. Daniel Shitten is American. Okay. It could be that, you know, people whose names are so close to the word Shitten are looking

for something a little more in this. Shitten. It's a good name. Shitten. Yeah. Yeah. It's a very powerful name. Yeah.

Shitten created the Flat Earth Society, possibly the most well-known of all Flat Earth organizations. Among their larger claims is that gravity is merely an illusion created by the momentum of the earth, which is constantly accelerating upward at 9.8 meters per second. Yeah, dude. And by the way, gravity is another way the Flat Earthers make fun of us. They like to call it gravity. As in the earth reaches up and grabs things and pulls it towards the center and that's God, how could you possibly believe in gravity?

Gravity. You got me. You got me. So, okay, so does this, do people that say gravity, do they believe in space then? What are we going through to enter? Is that space? Space. But they thought they didn't believe in space.

Well, some of them do. No, no, some of them do. I mean, some of them do. They just, none of them believe that we've ever been there. Okay. That's the thing. There's a big, gravity is a big go-to term. Van Allen radiation belt is a big old go-to term, which is why we never went to space

because it's too dangerous. This is why the moon landing was faked in order to beat the Russians, right? The whole thing, the moon, that's a deep, deep other, other conspiracy theory, hours of more research into that just to get to here. And it's very interesting to see them, too, do the thing where they're like, they say that gravity is what keeps us from flying off the face of the earth due to its spinning nature. But what about this balloon?

It's floating. Why doesn't gravity pull it down to the earth as well? Slider than air with the helium. No! No! But what about this sack of beans? Yeah, it's on the ground, but I lift it up. I put it on the shelf.

Why does it not fall down to the ground off the shelf? If your precious gravity wouldn't take it off the shelf and put it back on the ground. The thing is, just because it's on a shelf, and it's like, how do you, because the shelf is holding it now, and technically it's on the ground, but it's just the shelf, the ground has been elevated in a shelf form. So now I'm hot, now I'm holding five balloons. Where are these balloons going, huh? You see them?

They've really, it's interesting the way they flipped it, because then they tell us that we are freaking out, which is true, which is the very, we see this, this relationship quite a bit, where someone says something nonsensical, then you go all out of your way to be like, no, that's not true. Here's the fact to show you why what you said is not true. And then out of the guys being like, I don't see why you're making such a big deal about it. We're the one freaking out.

So it's just, there's a lot of gaslighting going on. Yeah. It seems like perhaps. Okay. Well, Shinton, I mean, we kind of mentioned him at the beginning of the episode as one of the more rational ones, like he's the one he believes in global warming, he believes in evolution, but these two beliefs may be part of the reason why the Flat Earth Society gets comments like this from other Flat Earthers.

I am not a member of the Flat Earth Society. They are a controlled opposition group who propagate lies about the true Flat Earth theories and overall truth movement. One of the organizations that has decidedly anti Flat Earth is Crypto's Media, who is a former cryptocurrency peddler out of Edmonton, Canada, whose proprietor and sole employee is Robbie Davidson. Be your own boss. That's what this country is about.

Yeah. Well, he's in Canada. He's Canadian. Well, fuck him then. And this is what Robbie Davidson said about the Flat Earth Society's idea that the Earth is a disk constantly flying upwards. A flying pancake in space. Oh, that's preposterous.

I'm sorry for saying it. Did he really say it's a flying pancake in space? That's preposterous. Yes. But did he have to by Canadian law describe it with a pancake? Technically, legally, a pancake is a flapjack in Canada. So I'm actually really, this is for us, for Americans, because it should have been a flying flapjack.

Davidson's belief is that the Earth is a stationary plane and that the sun, moon and stars are all inside a globe like the Truman Show. This belief and many others were put forth at a Flat Earth conference organized by Davidson and Raleigh, North Carolina just last year. Talks included waking up to mainstream science lies, NASA and other space lies, and exposing scientism. It also featured a live performance from the Globe Buster's YouTube channel and as a finale, the Flat Earth Video Awards.

It's fun. You've got a whole community. It is slightly more prestigious than a webby. Yes, it is. It's okay. I'm not upset about that, but all right. I would rather get one of these Flat Earth Video Awards. Of course.

And Best Kiss. It's Best Kiss and it's just me just kissing my own hand with a little wig on it and little googly eyes glued to it. Oh, technically, Mr. Zabrowski, that counts. Best Kiss goes to you and you. And if you're interested, the 2018 Flat Earth conference is coming up in November in Denver, Colorado. And Colorado, by the way, holds more Flat Earthers than anywhere else on Earth, which

further proves my position that Colorado is still struggling pretty hard to handle legal weed. No. No, there's nothing. A stoner loves more than space. I speak that from the heart. We love space. That's very, Henry also makes a great counterpoint.

However, I will say a couple of edibles. You got a big old joint and you go in there kind of blowing your mind about the earth being flat and stuff like that. And of course, then you start, then you start thinking about pizza, which is good for business. And then that leaves. You're so high. Why do you even care to Earth's flat? You should just be having a good time watching enter the void with your best girl sitting

on your knee. Sure. Sure. I will say this. The weed in Colorado, very strong. We all experienced that. Oh, yeah. I forget who gave me the weed beef jerky.

The sad thing is, it was some of the best beef jerky I ever had, but you can't eat it every day because it is full of THC. And by the way, don't worry. If you're bummed about missing NASA and other space lies last year, there's an encore performance in Denver this year. In fact, most of the talks in this year's Flat Earth Conference are the exact same talks where the ones that were at last year's Flat Earth Conference. Oh, it's the same lineup?

Yeah. Okay. It's the same lineup, but the same talks. Oh, I wonder if they're going to see a dip in goer ship? Is that the thing, man? People going to that thing? They love repeats. It's the Flat Earth Society, and they're going to go and you get all the hits.

Oh, yeah. You got a man screaming NASA. You got another guy throwing his shoe and a picture of like, they just put out a globe and people just throw their shoes at him. You know what? Now that I think about it, I like that. It's not like when you go see Bob Dylan and he's like, I'm going to play this off my new album from 2016 about how much money I have and cars are fast.

Yeah. Play the hits. But even these conferences have their detractors. One guy went on a radio show and called it a quote unquote, shill fast run by a deep state counterintelligence program. I mean, you really can't imagine how many of these people there are. There's Dave Murphy, aka allegedly Dave, who openly admits his Flat Earth belief was born of a midlife crisis.

There's Mike Kavanaugh, who is a former Flat Earth debunker until he watched an hour long video about the Apollo space program and it completely fucking flipped him. That dude is one of those where he's like, I believed in the lies, but now I know the truth and it's very intense. I was just listening to, he was on another four hour program and I was listening to it and the one of the hosts was like, yeah, you know, my kid, we've been taking him to conferences and he really doesn't know how to get it. He gets bored during the lectures and Kavanaugh was like, yeah, me too, my kid, he got away.

That's why he's got his phone there. He can play on the phone. And then I'm like, these people have fucking kids. How embarrassing is that for the children? First of all, you're bored to death and then second of all, you can't even tell anyone where you were for the weekend or you're going to be ostracized yourself. Yeah, of course. And there's other people too.

There's Karen Endicott who runs an organization called FECOR and then there's people like this guy who harassed an astronaut in Starbucks after the astronaut was kind enough to give him free NASA stickers. Oh my. That's so nice. You know, he definitely could have just attacked him. This is that guy right after his impromptu Q&A with the former astronaut, an old man. Well, I just got kicked out of Starbucks for asking NASA employee questions because he's

lying. He's a blatant liar. What a joke that was. Now we're outside, beautiful America. Man, that was ridiculous. I got NASA freaking stickers from the NASA employee, guys. And then I start asking him questions and he tells me to go outside of Starbucks. I'm freaking shaking.

I am shaking. I can't believe that just happened. He's shaking Ben. I guess so. I don't think he's experienced a lot in life if that shook him so hard, but interesting. This is sort of where I want to pause it for a second and say like, what makes this man so upset? Yeah.

What is it about this whole phenomenon that makes people so enraged and so passionate and so committed? Like the idea of they really dislike scientists and they really hate NASA and they seem to be jealous of astronauts. But I don't know if it's just because they're raking into Bush and the Tush because they're astronauts and there's cool stories and they're always, they're fucking always killer and they got nothing to say when they go to a potluck. Maybe.

Well, this guy, this is the same guy that was like NASA means to deceive in Hebrew. This is him. Ah, that's what that man sounds like, huh? Sounds like every YouTube comment. Yeah. Interesting. Yeah, yeah. This guy is a YouTube comment come to life.

The astronaut, if I'm not mistaken, wasn't he in like his 80s? Yeah. He was very old. Okay. What makes them like this? Why do they get so upset? I understand the idea of being deceived is very hard to take and you believe that you've been deceived your whole life.

But where's your, where's your horse in this fight? Henry, why do birds sing? Why is Jack Black so funny? Why is the earth flat? These are answers, you know, that we'll never get. These are questions we'll ever get answers to. But this rage comes from somewhere and it's not just YouTube videos and not just reading old literature from the 1800s.

It's like, it has to come from some other place. It's like a joke we made about Hollow Moon where they, if you believe the moon is hollow, you lost your job yesterday and if you believe that the moon is a fucking hologram, Deborah's not coming back and they're taking the apartment out of your hands. Dude, it is literally, he literally thought, was this, that was a YouTube post, right? Yeah. He was going to love it. Yeah.

It's like when you, when you're, when you're a kid, maybe in middle school or something and farting is funny. Yeah. And the kids are like, that's really funny. But then one day you do it and no one laughs anymore and you're like, I thought that was going to crush. That was like going to. No, we're actually dolting.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now he, that was removed from YouTube for harassment. I had to search pretty hard to find that clip. Really? Yeah. And he was, he got quite a few stories, but he loved it. He absolutely, he loved all of the attention that he got out of this.

And this guy, yeah, that, the video of him talking about Hebrew and all that is one that Rachel sent me. I think it was about four, three, four hours long. And he is serious about this and he's very angry about this. Just like all conspiracy theorists are very, very angry. I'm just going to say, if you're a conspiracy theorist, at least have fun with it. No. I mean, if the earth is flat, I mean, you, and you know it's flat, you should be having

a great time. Flat Earth Society guy, he has a little bit more fun than the rest, but this guy, the ones that bring like Zionists into it and all that, like those dudes are fucking angry. So it's safe to say, Henry, from your perspective, they're more serious than alien enthusiasts because alien enthusiasts seem to have a little fun. You know what's about it with terms of the UFO problem, which is what I like to call it, and the alien agenda, examining where it is, what it is, how it is, who it is. A part of that is a love of sci-fi and a love of the things beyond this dimension and it's

fun to think about. Today, it's exciting for me, UFOs and alien stuff is an inspiring way for my brain to go, measuring the cosmos, things outside of this dull existence. And this idea that this guy, it's something about, it's mixed with, not having the rage, because a part of it's like, there's obviously rage in the UFO world as well because we believe that the United States knows more about their, they won't really release their research and all the things that they know about aliens, that's where the kind of that kind of weird shit enters into the UFO world.

But something like this is just very, it's very intense. I just wonder where it all comes from. Yeah, can't be mad at Starbucks, buddy. Get a Frappuccino, calm down. Oh, I guess I want to help you calm down, but it might make you happy. I think a lot of these people, like, they're just angry and they want some new attach their anger to, and for some of these people, like, flat earth is what they attach it to. And I guess it's the only, and because the other thing about conspiracy theory is that

it does make them feel a little better about their anger, it gives their anger some sort of outlet, it gives them something, it's what we always say is that conspiracy theory is placing order into a chaotic universe. That way things make a little more sense, like the shitty things that happen to you in your life and the things that happen to the people that you love, if a conspiracy theory is behind all of that, then that gives you somewhere to place your anger, you put your anger somewhere. But if life is just chaos, if we are, in fact, a chaotic spinning globe, then you have no power whatsoever, and not only do you have no power, but nobody has power, and that is

the most terrifying thought of all. It's just funny, and I know we can move on, but to me, once again, very liberating. We can only do what you can do. Give yourself agency, give yourself meaning, give every day one of your actions meaning, you can do that without, you don't even have to, you could have religion or not, you could have God or not, you could have a flat earth or not, because my big thing too is like, who cares if the earth is flat or round, what about the people on the flat earth, what about all the shit that's here that you could be dealing with, that was really what, like it

was haunting to me, partially it was because I saw the Mr. Rogers documentary and I spontaneously started ugly crying between two people on a plane, which I was not expecting. See, oh my God, your heart grew two sizes that flight, isn't it incredible? It hit me right in the fucking gut, he said stuff that I needed to hear, but there was a part of it that was that, of being like, when I was listening to the, which is showing that I'm losing my itch, and I'm becoming, I'm becoming soft, but I was like listening to them, the flat earthers all yell at each other on this podcast for four hours, talking about their kids, and I was like, you could have used these four hours to be with your

kids instead of doing this. You should go do that, you should go do something else and then come back around, there's other ways to spend your life than worrying about whether or not the earth is flat, or not. But the problem is that a lot of them say that they are doing this for us, they are doing this for everybody else because they can't stand to see all of us lied to, so they're trying to liberate us, although what it is they're trying to liberate us from, not many of them can really agree on that. However, we're not gonna go completely negative on all flat earthers here, there's actually

one guy whom we believe actually deserves our utmost respect. That man is Mad Mike Hughes. Mad Mike Hughes is a 61 year old limo driver making about 15 bucks an hour. This man taught himself rocket science, used that knowledge to build a functioning rocket out of salvage, then last year launched himself in that rocket, 1,900 feet in the air going 350 miles an hour and he survived. I'll tell you what next thing I'm gonna do is start a podcast. I firmly believe limo drivers are some of the smartest people in the world, they hear

a lot of stories, yes they do. So why did he do this? Why did he do it? Why? Well, Mad Mike is a flat earther and like most flat earthers, he only believes what he sees and he wanted to see the shape of the goddamn earth in his words, quote, I'm not gonna take anyone else's word for it. And this wasn't Mad Mike's first attempt.

In 2014, he made it almost 1,400 feet in the air and even before that, he set the Guinness world record for the longest ramp jump made by a limo, 103 feet. Dude, this guy is a superstar. Dude, there's a part of me that says, man, that's a lesson to learn. You want to see the fucking curvature of the earth, build your own goddamn rocket and you go into space with it, that's what you want. That's awesome. You can go do that.

But tomorrow, you go build a rocket, you go learn how to read, you can go and learn how to speak Spanish like you've been saying you want to do for years. You can do it. You just got to be Mad Mike enough about it to do it. I do want to learn how to speak Spanish. That is on my list. Oh yeah, me too. And furthermore, on the day of last year's launch, as he was strapped in about to begin

the countdown, the rocket started leaking fluid. The pressure started dropping. Uh oh. Mike, he just said, fuck it. He skipped the countdown and pressed the button anyway. I'm going to space and piss the shit. He's not weak, Mike. He's mad, Mike.

And he lived up to that nickname that day. And when he safely parachuted his rocket down to earth and was asked by the Associated Press what he was going to do that night, Mike said he was just happy to go home to his cats. Wow. All he wanted to do was see pockets in muffins. Even more time. But Mike, he's not in there, man.

He is working with Research Flat Earth, who admittedly funded most of Mike's last rocket trip. OK. These guys are working together to go even higher. Together, they plan to build what Mike calls a raccoon, which is a combination rocket balloon. Wow. Oh, it seems to me that they two won't really work together, but if one man can do it, I believe that Mad Mike will at least try.

I don't know. Maybe the rocket just needs a little help from a balloon. And if they manage to pull it off, Mad Mike will travel 68 miles above the earth, which should be high enough to see for himself if the earth is round or flat. But despite being able to do all of this, Mike does not believe in science. Hell yeah, man. How does he think that he listens? This is what he said.

OK. This is what he said. Let's try here. There's no whole about aerodynamics and fluid dynamics and how things move through the air about the certain size of rocket nozzles and thrust, but that's not science. That's just a formula. There's no difference between science and science fiction. He taught himself rocket science and doesn't believe in it.

Doesn't believe in it? How is he a genius and dumb? My brain is broken. How can he be so smart? So logical. It's stupid. This is why I love, that's why you got to talk to people. This is why I love humans.

Talk to your limo drivers. So while most flat earthers waste their time making YouTube videos pretty much just for each other, Mad Mike Hughes used his belief to do something truly extraordinary, and I think he deserves a sincere round of applause for doing it. Look at that. USA. USA. Sincerely.

I am sincerely in awe of this man. He is possibly the most human human to ever exist. I love it. Awesome. Possibly the most American human to ever exist. There are possibly the most human Americans. It is uniquely American in that he figured something out, but he also is kind of dumb. He fucking flew it over an old ghost town.

He's cool. He's not even dumb. He's a genius. I just believe whatever he thinks about science is right. You don't want it because it really is true. If you really want to believe the earth is flat, great. If you want to think that the earth is round, who cares? That's not fun.

Just do whatever the fuck it is that you want. I don't really care, but don't lump all the other stuff into it. If you just want to believe the life of the flat earth is fine, do all that shit, but then please don't go and harass the survivors of Sandy Hook afterwards. Yes. As long as you keep them separate, we're good to go. And don't harass the astronauts in Starbucks either, especially after they give you free NASA stickers.

My God. Give you free stickers. Stickers are expensive. All right. Well, that was very informative. Interesting world. It's a bigger world than people might imagine. There's a lot of flat earthers out there.

It's pretty large. Yeah. I mean, it's a really strange, it's probably the strangest pocket of conspiracy theory that we have today. Well, other than them lumping all the negative ones, as Henry just mentioned with Sandy Hook and in Pizza Gate, this one is also relatively harmless as long as you don't actively harm people or yell at folks. Many of the people that live in flat, yeah, because the guy that I quoted is saying that

if they're lying to this, they're lying about everything else. He said that he was an Iraq war veteran, and he came back from the war, just completely disillusioned, and then he started watching YouTube conspiracy videos, and he watched another one, and another one, another one. He said he spent an entire weekend just sitting in front of his computer watching conspiracy videos. And since he'd already been fucked over in Iraq, then they all made sense to him. And so by the time he got to flat earth, he was like, yeah, of course this is true.

Everything else is fucking, everything else is a lie. Everything is a lie. So of course the very shape of the earth is a lie. Right. Well, I guarantee you, Hans Blix will get to the bottom of it, and that's a WMD joke. That's a pretty good 2004 joke right there. Thank you. 2003.

Yeah, I'm in the 2000s anyway. I'm pretty great. Yeah, it's a good 2003 joke right there. I like that. These people are coming from a lot of pain, so a part of me gets it. There's pain laced throughout this whole world, a part of what I didn't realize was just how big this was. Yeah.

And how like when we did Hollow Moon and we did Hollow Earth, those are the sort of like niche conspiracy theories, niche, I don't know how to fucking pronounce it, some sort of like niche conspiracy theories where flat earth really is like, they should brand it into shoes and clothes and stuff and drinks, energy drinks. Sure. Like they're missing a lot of branding opportunities. Because again, like I said, it's a lifestyle, it's your entire thing. Dude, people would be the spokes, Kyrie would be a great spokesperson.

Flat Earth has its own music genre, like one of the flat earth websites that I visited, they have a thing called FETV, and they've even photoshopped like an MTV logo to make it look like FETV, and it's just a constant stream of songs about flat earth. Remember that song we used to play during live shows, There Ain't No Curvature? Oh, of course. There Ain't No Curvature, of course I remember that song. Henry sent us one too in the text chain, really, I listened to it on the way over here, kind of good.

It's all right. Rachel sent me one that was just a guy that isolated the line, space may be the final frontier but it's made in a Hollywood basement from Californication by Red Hot Chili Peppers and he just looped that over and over and over again as a sample that he kind of sort of wrapped over. I love it. There's this, it's just such a gigantic phenomenon and it's very bizarre and it's, you know, it's where we are now.

Well, do whatever you gotta do to survive in this mad, mad world. Just be nice about your beliefs and if you think the earth is flat, you should be really happy for whatever reason because you're the only one that knows it. Yes, exactly. Read flat, don't read flat lands because it's not like a total celebration of things being flat. They actually malign a lot of flat things in there, so don't look for shit in there to help support your argument because you will be triggered.

This one's called The Chest of Johnny Depp. We do not like it, it's way too flat. But I, this was a fun little conspiracy, we haven't done internet conspiracy in a long time, but next week begins October, the witching season begins, we're about to get very dark and very fucked up, we have an entire month of programming planned for you dirty fuckers that you're gonna enjoy and I'm very, very excited for it. Well our audience is very clean, very, very clean. I wanna thank everyone, I had a chance to go talk to Culver Stockton College and kids

gotta eat credit, by the way, for seeing me. That's, they say our education system is flawed. Not anymore. It must have gotten that credit for putting up with you. Yeah, got it did, got it did, but I wanna thank Brian who brought me down to Culver Stockton College that was really nice and it was a great opportunity and I hope all those kids are very successful. I'm sure they will be.

Who knows? They're old. I just channeled my internet, I just saw, for some reason I watched a clip of Regis Filmin and I just wanna end every second, who knows? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I'm a rival.

Let's see, follow us on social media, I'm Ben Kissel, Ben Kissel on Instagram, Marcus Parks is Marcus Pox for everything, Dr. Fantasty and Henry loves you. Instagram at LP on the left, we got a shit ton of shows coming up, come see what our bodies look like in person, I tell you what, they're a lot looser. Except for mine, it's much tighter. It's getting looser up top, always tight in the bottom. No, no dude, I've been going to the climbing gym. You have been, that's right.

He did it two times, it's gotta become a habit and I'll be with you. I will go with you one point because I started going to climbing gym with my, this is the most LA thing I've done, I went to an indoor climbing gym, not built for the heights. Really? I clamber up that motherfucker. Yeah, yeah, more of a burrower, that would be fun, but no, check us out, we're in Austin, we're coming to Dallas, we're coming to Okay City, and it's gonna be a blast, so come check it out.

Oh yeah, can't wait to go to Oklahoma City. Yes, absolutely. Me too. Exciting town, I've heard that it's dirty and gritty. By the way guys, on the way down to Oklahoma City, I'm sorry, I'm in charge of the music, I hope you like Bad Company, Buy Bad Company, Off the Elven Bad Company, because that's all we're gonna listen to. I'm pretty excited.

All right, goodbye everybody. All right everyone, hail yourselves. Hail Satan. Agin. Magus Dalatians. Hail me. Hey, why don't you check it on the earth? See what shape it's in.

All right, I'll see you soon.