Last Podcast On The Left - Episode 35: There's Bones In The Chocolate

Episode Date: February 17, 2015

The boys explore the world of mentally challenged serial killers.

There's no place to escape to. This is the last time. On the left. That's when the cannibalism started. What was that? Good, good. Ready to go. Hold on, I'm warming it up. I'm warming up. Let me warm up real quick. Good and warm. Alright, welcome to the last podcast. Everybody with Marcus Parks and Ben Kissel with us as always. Hong Kong, Henry's of Russia! I wear, I wear so many tape crawls. It's my shirt and my pants. What are you wearing? Tape crawls? Tape crawls. I heard paper clothes. That's fine. That's fine as well. I could see a Chinese person covered in origami clothing.

That's awful. I mean, I'm just ignorant of the culture. That's all I'm saying. I just don't know if someone could send us pamphlets. But I mean like short things about China or Thailand so that I can actually get some facts. That would really be great. Okay. You think you're going to listen to those facts or are you just going to completely discount them and continue on with your racist attitudes? I just need them in sentence forms. Just one sentence at a time. Little bits, positive Chinese information. Just send them to me. That would be really great. That's good. And that's similar to how you would teach a retarded child about the wonderful culture of China and the Chinese people, which is what we're going to be talking about today. We're going to take you down the very slow poke road of retarded serial killers. For some reason it's just been, it's been retard week. It actually, it's been like kind of retard month here at Cave Comedy Radio. Well, I definitely listened to the last round table yesterday and you guys were talking about retarded criminals.

And I was like, oh man, I really want to know how many different retarded criminals there were. Because I mean like my family is literally chock full of the mentally challenged. I got some in mine as well. So it's, I'm very familiar with that. My family's happy and healthy. It's different, which is so weird because you're so crooked and dark. Yeah, it is very bizarre. We're so happy and full of life over here. Oh, for life. Hello. You would really think that your family would have a whole series of different disgusting mutations just given your past history with frogs and

No, we're all mentally ill. Don't get me wrong. We're definitely all mentally ill. But we're very high functioning. Well, Jackie and I were the only ones that were not mentally, we just don't have any specific short problems. Do you have autistic people there or Down syndrome people? We have several Down syndrome syndrome. We have several with just general learning disabilities. There's some Tourettes. Tourettes always seem like a fun one.

We see all of my cousins with Tourettes are brilliant. They're very smart, but they're just, it's like when we were kids it was very crazy. They used to take their clothes off too. I mean, so did I. Yeah. When I was a naked little boy, I used to take off all my clothes and run around the supermarket, which is why I had to be chained to the cart, which is actually true. I had two leashes. I had a leash around my waist and a leash around my waist to my mom's purse and a leash on my hand to the shopping cart. Well, it makes sense that you're Hong Kong Henry Zabrowski right now because as a child you sounded like King Kong Henry Zabrowski.

I was a little naked terror. That's amazing. Now I'm a big naked terror. You look beautiful. So you did some research, Henry, and you found four actual mentally disabled serial killers or just killers in general. A lot of it is like the controversy of executing people who are mentally challenged for doing heinous, heinous crimes. I mean, because we started talking about it, you know, it's like, and it's true. You guys were talking on round table and sort of general terms about how the mentally challenged are very nice.

Yeah. I remember I had a teacher in high school who believed in God for the first time in his whole life because a retarded boy at a birthday party made this big, sloppy piece of shit birthday cake. I mean, you know what I mean? It was very sweet. Yeah. But you know, it's not a good cake. It's not going to be on a cake boss. Well, I'll tell you. You know, but it's like. It might be on cake boss.

You know what I mean? But it's like, they had like candles all over it with like sort of like jammed at different places and he's like, I love you. And like, he started crying and he believed in God, you know. Very easy to convince this guy of God. Yeah. I mean, just in terms of. All it took was a retard cake. But he was like, it's just.

All it took was just one retard cake. And that's all. I'm one retarded cake away from being fun again. But the. You got to tell Pastor Joel Osteen about this. All it is is a retard cake. You don't know. You don't got to feel Yankee Stadium anymore.

But I mean, he saw it as an evidence of universal love. That's what he said. Right. And that's just the truth, you know, it's like my cousins are incredibly positive, good people, very strong. But they are like incredibly good people. Strong when happy. Reverse at the Hulk. They're active in their community.

They're volunteers. They have jobs. They do. They graduated from high school. I mean, they. Not really. But you know, like they. Specialized.

Same high school I graduated from. Yeah. Exactly. In my whole life, I only encountered one violent retarded person. Super violent. Yeah. Yeah. This little girl that was the kind of guy.

She was a lot younger than I am. She had Down syndrome. Yeah. And she would. Angry Downs. She would rip her. Fuck. She would rip her hair out by with like.

But that actually is probably a sign of abuse. Yeah. You just told me. Well, if you're talking about if you want to talk about abuse, here's what they used to do to her. She would get so like nuts. So and crazy out of control. They had this small room built. I may have told you guys about this before.

They had this small room built with one way glass in it. Like this. No, I never heard this. And yeah, with a one way glass in it. And in the middle of the room, the room was about the size of our recording studio. Maybe like 10 by 10, something like that. Oh, so it's bigger than our recording studio. Yeah, bigger than our recording.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And there would be this raised platform. And on. So wait a second. Wait a second. The room that we record many podcasts in. Most of them. Is smaller than a retard's punishment room.

Yeah, it sounds that way at this point. Wow. Yes. Jesus Christ. Absolutely. Much smaller. Good to know where we are in life. And there was a raised platform in the room.

And on the platform was a wooden chair. Kind of somewhat of a throne. And on the wooden chair, on the arms were leather straps. Sure. And on the legs, leather straps. And they would strap her in. Like on these leather straps, whenever she was bad, until she would calm down. They would leave her alone in a dark room, strapped to a chair.

Sometimes I feel like I need that to calm down too. Yeah. You know, I'd love to just, I'd love to just have some time to just sit in a chair, strap down. Right. Just to relax. I think it's going to throw, you know, smoke some bong hits around her though and blow it right in her face.

That would also help her. Yeah, she was a biter. You got to do the ears though. Yeah, her name is Sabrina. Sabrina. I mean, that's the thing. Sabrina, I'm sure she was a really nice gal. Did not like to be tied down.

I mean, I think it's hard to people have, they're very smart in a lot of ways. Like we were talking about on round table, this fellow that we know takes care of the slow pokes. And he has life all figured out. Kiss him, miss him, kill him. Yeah, the kiss him, miss him, kill him thing is pretty disturbing. But I just say, I guess that when, when you're a low functioning, you are a direct mirror of what your circumstances are.

Right. Those stories have probably involved people being pretty heavily, heavily abused. And for the record, the Supreme Court did take up the case of killing the Tartar children and they decided in 2002 in the case Atkins versus Virginia against it. They don't like the idea of killing retarded people. So I think it's no longer legal in all 50 states. But that's where, now a lot of these like death row cases will come down to, if it's even hedging on that, they will, they will do constant sort of visits to like the psychological

experts to like judge them. That's what happened with, maybe we can go to the first one, Johnny Paul Penry. Let's talk, you want to talk, okay, so yeah, Johnny Paul Penry. Now this fellow was, so he was borderline retarded. He was a Texas man born in 1956 and he was convicted of stabbing and raping 22 year old Pamela Mosley Carpenter. Who was also the sister of a famous American football star, Mark Mosley. Yeah.

So it's like, so it was a huge case. She, he committed a heinous violent crime against this woman. Right. And basically they used it, they used his, his mental state to sort of, to try to jockey him into innocence. Right. And we were kind of like talking about this before where, it's just hard, you know, when it comes to a heinous crime, a heinous sexual crime, that it's like, how can you, what can

you say? How can you defend this person? It's tough. I was just thinking like, well, you know, how could he be retarded and raped? Because it's sort of an intellectual thing to do. But then I realized that's a totally stupid thought because it's probably, it's as primitive as you can get. Yeah.

So I guess retarded people can rape. Oh yeah. Like if you look at just serial killers and how like they're normally classified. So you have a lot of, they generally fall into like organized and disorganized. Like this is just in serial killers, right? In terms of methodology. And so it's like, organized serial killers are normally a very high IQ. Like the common example is Ted Bundy.

Right. Ted Bundy was a genius. To some, he wasn't a total idiot. He wasn't, but he had like an above average IQ. Right. The above average IQ was like 112. And he did, you know, he would plot out a highly organized killing. Same thing with Jeffrey Dahmer, highly organized.

Yes. But it's like what he would just, or he would have what you could call a playing space in his house that he could allow himself to really let his hair down. Right. And be as disorganized as he wants. It's the side of his apartment. And disorganized killers are spree killers. They're normally, these are people that have very low IQs.

Like at a lot of those killings have to do with like sexuality. It's like stuff like, what's his name? The Boston Strangler, Albert DeSalvo. Except I mean like he would dress up as a delivery man and then just rape 90 year old women. You ever heard that story? That's what he used to do? No. He used to rape 90 year old women and then kill them, strangle them to death with their

pantyhose and then leave them in grotesque positions like in their house. Like leave them like sitting up in a chair with their legs like spread up on two tables with a big fancy bro. Watch and murder she wrote. Yeah, yeah. That's nice of him to do that. It's like half filled out Sudoku that he just did, you know? Right.

And just put it next to him. You know? Really detailed work. Yeah, yeah. But that's what, so he gets sexual crimes. It's really prevalent in low IQ criminals. Which makes sense. You know, no one's having sex with John Paul Penry.

Have you ever had a retarded man get hard while hugging you? I have. Then how does that, so how does that feel? Disturbing, awful. It feels like the saddest and worst story in the world. Do they have like, kinda, it's... It's like if you scratch a dog too much and you watch it get a boner and then you sit and watch it.

How long were you hugged? No, Henry. You don't watch it. How long were you in embrace with this man? It was just quick, but he was hard. You feel like it's because your body is just sort of one big tit and he was just like rubbing against it. No, I have a, I mean, like, literally.

I would get hard if I just rubbed my dick. You literally folded my belly. Henry is now lifting up his shirt and showing us where we can fold a pussy into his stomach. You could maybe. I'm not that fat. No, you're not that fat. But I'm just enough to get a dick in. Right.

A nice sized dick could fit in there. Or small, well, retards. Tiny little one. You know, it's kinda, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi. The belly. I made pudding. Did he have a boner before you started hugging him? Yes.

Okay. Yeah. That's why Henry went in for the hug. You really wanted to feel that sweet moment. But like, you remember when you got in trouble for hugging too much in school? I was a lover. Yeah. I was a lover.

I think it's the same exact thing where they're just, I've heard that they are hypersexual. Yeah. You have the, like, male belly equivalent of Kim Kardashian's ass. Yeah. Like, it is just, you wanna really stick a nice dick in there. You think about it, I like me more. I like you more now, too. Ooh, where's that Ray J, huh?

I don't know. Get me a TV show. I wanna see that sex tape. So, uh... Front butts. Front butts. Henry Zabrowski presents front butts and it just dudes fucking my belly. And then it's just like, within writing me a check for $50,000 afterwards, and I'm like,

thank you. Yeah. Uh, Marcus is like... He's fucking my belly and playing video games on my phone. Marcus and I were watching some Brazilian fart porn. You saw the Brazilian fart porn. Oh, man, those strong farts. Yeah.

It looks like a ghost. Man, they're blowing hair back. It looks like paranormal activity. Like, it's like... I wish the chick was dressed like royalty and be called... Queef of England. Which would be fun. So, let's go on to the next one.

Oh, you don't wanna talk about him anymore? I mean, that's really just... That was just more of an example of someone who... Okay. Like, a heinous crime done by someone who can't... Okay, and he ended up being killed in 1980. For his heinous, heinous, heinous crimes. Okay, so let's move on now.

There's another fella which I must give name of the decade. Triple R, Ricky Ray Rector. Ricky Ray. Ricky Ray. Rector, I just killed her. You know, something like that. So, you can just imagine that. So, this is actually...

This is not a full mental retardation. Did you read our diage on the test? But this is more a... So, Ricky Ray was a bad boy. He was an naughty boy. He robbed and killed a man and shot a man. He shot the man at Tommy's old-fashioned homestyle restaurant. Come on, guys.

This is my old-fashioned child restaurant. Ain't no reason to kill people in Conway, Arkansas. Come on, guys. Ain't no reason to kill people in my restaurant. Old-fashioned, so that it doesn't pass any health inspection. When you got dudes getting a big old iron pot. I took the bottom of a tractor. You make stew in it.

That sounds like a good stew. I would eat that. You make stew. So, this guy, born in 1950, Conway, Texas, his crime took place. Conway, Arkansas. Yeah, I'm sorry. Arkansas. And this all happened underneath the...

At the time, Governor Bill Clinton. Yes. Yes, yes, yes. And so, he shot and killed a man and he went... He escaped. He ran and hid with his family. And he's not retarded at this point. No.

And so, he... By the way, the reason for the murder is that the bouncer at Tommy's old-fashioned homestyle restaurant wouldn't let Conway... Or wouldn't let Mr. Rector's friend in because he couldn't pay the $3 cover charge. God, God, that is just... You get to the door. Do you have $3? Uh-huh.

Oh, no, sir. I was like... Do you have $3? Why the fuck is Tommy's old-fashioned homestyle restaurant charging a $3 cover charge? Cover charge. What is this? Studio 54? It just sounds like Big Chet is out front of the door and they're going in and he's like,

Come on. Give me $3 toll. Yeah. He's like, There ain't no $3 toll. There is today? No, come on, man. I don't want to give him no $3 toll. No, there's a dance hall attached to it.

I agree. We mentioned Ricky Ray at a dance hall. Ricky Ray's doing there. He don't dance. Ricky don't dance. And he killed a guy with a.38 caliber. So, he goes home. He talks to his family about it.

They're like, You got to turn yourself in. They have a family friend. It's a police officer. He comes to take his turning in and they talk for a while with the family. And then the police officer turns around and Ricky Ray shoots him in the back a couple times and escapes in and then is eventually caught. So, what happened is right before he's caught. But what happened to the officer that he shot?

Did he end up dying? Yes. He murdered the officer. So, this is two deaths on this man's hand. And two other assaults. Yes. This guy has ruined his life. This is like one crazy night in Ricky Ray's life.

And so, he decides to end it all and shoots himself in the head, but he fucks it up and just destroys his entire frontal lobe, right? So, he gives himself a pretty professional lobotomy. Yeah. And so, what they're saying, this end up using as a giant example for Bill Clinton's when he ran for president. Right. And talking about why we can't severely punch the mentally retarded.

But it seems to me as if Rector made himself retarded after he already committed the crimes when he wasn't as retarded. If you made yourself retarded, that just points against you. You know what I mean? Yeah, you lose. If you did it, then you're the problem. You know, you're one of the problems in this scenario. And I'll tell you, there is nothing worse than a botched suicide, especially when a gun

is involved and it's aimed at your head. There was a fellow that lived across the street from me. He was in high school. He was a rabble rouser. He was drinking with a bunch of friends, brings out the family shotgun, actually shoots his friend. This girl, she dies. So all of his friends leave.

He has a police standoff for hours. And my parents had to, we all had to go to my grandma's house. Whoa. Next thing you know, around five in the morning, they hear a shotgun blast the police rush in. He shoots himself in the head, but she fucked it up with a shotgun blew off his entire face. He's still in prison.

He's on suicide watch. No face. And he looks like the woman who got her face tore off by the fucking feet. He's our face. He is. He is literally our face. From the walking dead. Oh my god.

No, no, no. Preacher. Oh, from preacher. Wow. That's number one bad story. Yeah. Number one bad story. So right there actually sort of got off easy.

So on his last meal, he got his like traditional, it doesn't say what his meal meal was. I think it was like, you know, it's like, it's like roast beef and something and a big slice of pecan pie. He probably ordered, he probably ordered something from fucking Tommy's old fashioned home style restaurant. I just wanted to get you. Oh, I can't. Okay.

Ricky Ray. They sent him. Yeah. They sent him, they gave him the pizza pie and then he didn't eat it. And they're like, Ricky Ray, you didn't eat your pie. And he's like, that's saving it for later. Saving it for later. God, that is the saddest thing I have ever heard.

They're like, Ricky, you're, you're going to go never mind. Never mind. Just hold on to it for you, Ricky. We're going green miles out. We're going green miles out. Soon, Ricky, you'll be reunited. I'll be reunited. I'll be gone by the night.

No. I can't wait to eat my pizza pie. Your retard voice is making me want to cry. Right now, I'm just so full. I can't wait to eat my pizza pie. Why don't you guys give me so much food? You're right. It was their fault for feeding him too much.

Come on, yes. He's like a goldfish. He'll eat himself to death. Okay, guys. It's so much fun being here in this tiny room. And you got him smelling of meat. It sounds great. You know, you're right.

It does make me very sad. Yeah, it really is. It's kind of shaking me up to be honest with you. Well, what the listeners at home can't see is the look in Henry's eye. Really? And the hunched stature that he has while he's doing it. What I'm really hoping is that I will win an Oscar one day for playing the very inspirational retarded locker room boy.

Just like... I don't know. You guys don't feel so high back game. I think you guys can win it. I think you're channeling a bit of your young... Oh, Mikey Shatz. Mikey Shatz, which is the greatest character ever. The funny thing about Rector's lethal injection, it didn't go very good.

It took him 50 minutes to find a suitable vein. And that's what they're saying. He was like moaning and like... Yeah, they said the moans... Yeah, the State Department guys said the moans did come as the team of two medical people. Oh, the moans did come. Yes. The moans did come.

And lo, the moans did come. If people weren't to find a fucking suitable vein in this poor bastard, I don't understand why it was so difficult. I guess he was a bit of a chubby monkey. No, you imagine doing a lethal injection on me is going to be really hard. I have a hard time with a doctor. I guess it is harder to find a vein with a chubbier person, huh? Makes sense.

Yeah, you gotta be stabbing him three or four times. And I'll tell you what, chubby people are just not good getting stabbed over and over again. Well, there's a reason why skinny folks are so good at heroin. That's true. That's very true. It's a vicious cycle. A thick fucking mainline. Yeah, Europeans are just cording a needle.

They are just romanticizing with that needle, but in a nice little last waltz with it. And we're going to use this last guy, but I actually like the idea of talking about Ed Gein. Yeah, Ed Gein. Yeah, let's talk about Ed Gein. Of course, he was a retarded movie fame, Leatherface. Also, Leatherface based on him, and then Psycho, which is more of a high IQ version of him. And then also, the movie Deranged, which is based entirely just on Ed Gein's life, which is awesome. Deranged is so creepy.

And when we say intelligent, it's in the context of serial killers. We're not going to talk about intelligent like in the context of people who built the highways. Yeah, like McGree, Neil Grasse, Tyson. They're still stupid people, you know? Yeah, I mean, they have, I don't know if it's stupid. They just have a missing part of their personality that like is the governor for normal behavior. Right. Like Ed Gein, but Ed Gein was seriously retarded.

Yes. There's certain things that you have to, there's certain things, it's like, we talk about it with serial killers with like, you know, Dahmer, I think Dahmer and like Gacy, right? They created alternative worlds where it's just like they lived in their alternate world and then when they go out in the real world, they shut the door on their secret world and they can just live their life and go out and act normal. I mean Dahmer worked at a chocolate factory, which is the most beautiful job a serial killer could have. You imagine the droplets of blood that he puts in every fifth like piece of chocolate.

The fucking bone fragments under his fingernails. Oh, the chocolate, it's in the chocolate. But I would say, in defense of... No, it's in the chocolate, don't eat the chocolate. Ed Gein, there's bones in the chocolate. I like this one. It has hazelnuts, huh? There's not supposed to be hazelnuts in that. Just one man screaming outside the factory.

There's bones. There's bones in the chocolate. Oh, mommy, I've never had chocolate before. I can't wait to eat my first bar of chocolate. No! There's bones in the chocolate! Okay, we'll go somewhere else. Apparently they have bones in their chocolate. That's fine.

My empire is crumbling. My chocolate empire is destroying itself. Why can't we get rid of him? It's a free country. Well, this is a goddamn free country. You're right, we can't fire another white man. Really wonderful chocolate. But Ed Gein lived in his world of horrors

simply because he was so stupid. He was very, very, very stupid. He was beaten into retardation, though. That's a big thing. You were saying before about how I think that when certain mentally retarded people are abused, that's all they know. Ed Gein lived a very perverse, fucked-up lifestyle.

He lived with his mother until the house, until she died. And then when she died, he let her stay in there. How long did he let her stay in there and rot? No, no, because he had to bury her at some point because didn't he bury her and then continually go back to the gravesite and dig her up at times and play with her bones? Because I think that her head was used for an ashtray.

And her skin was used to make the woman's suit. And her arm was used as a flute. It's nice, he was a nice musician boy. Who's playing that crude, disgusting music next door? Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do. This goddamn arm sucks for a flute. Is this a Jurassic Park theme? But Ed Gein, in his defense, he only killed two women.

He's not really like a very, he's not a notorious killer. He's not. And I think that what he did, as far as like grave robbing and putting, you know, making lampshades and other throw rugs out of people's skin, why not, you know? I think it's more respectful to the human body than just letting it rot underground and getting eaten by a bunch of bugs.

I feel like if Native Americans did it, like it would be sort of a thing where I'd be like, Native Americans, it's natural. It's nice. They're out there, they're already doing it to a buffalo. Do Grandma, you know? But Ed Gein just started when you, I think there's like, when you make a suit

out of your mother's entire skin. Really amazing. And you put it on yourself. Yeah. And you masturbate while it's on you. Well, that gets a little bit weird. That's more like, That is no longer, that is no longer a beautiful tradition.

Yeah. I mean, in nowadays though, he'd be on some reality show, like Project Runway or whatever show that he's on, all those skin-wearing freaks. Yeah, that's a great show. What if Ed Gein was one-sixteenth Navajo? Oh, fuck, man. That throws my whole argument in the toilet.

He wasn't, so don't worry about it. Okay, good, good, good. I'm just hypothetically. Hypothetically. Actually, from Wisconsin, there's a lot of Native American friends. But once you start mashing up bones in order to make your furniture,

it's just like, come on, man, I know it's a hike to get to Ikea. I was just, I would rather do it this way. It's easier to put together a human bones and make them into a couch than it is to buy a couch from Ikea and try to put that goddamn thing together. Don't tell me you have no idea what they're doing. It's all the way out in Red Hook, dude.

Jesus Christ. All the way out in Red Hook. I'm just gonna kill my mother and use her vagina to make a bunch of little belts. Right as well. Think of it this way. All right. I live right next to the biggest cemetery in all of Brooklyn.

Yes. Imagine the amount of sofas you could make. I live a long way from Red Hook. I gotta take a train and two buses to get there, or I can walk over and dig up some Civil War veterans' bodies and have a whole new rug. Yeah. I mean, it would be cool.

You just keep pulling into the rug and it's just a loose pile of bones on the floor. I like the rug. I love your roll around and it gets a rug. Well, time to vacuum the rug. Yeah. No, you believe it. You won't believe it.

You eat me. You step on anything enough and it just turns right into a rug. It really does. It's really remarkable. And you know what? Hair lasts a long time. It never goes.

It never leaves. It's been a really fun afternoon. I gotta be going. Yeah? Yeah. I'm gonna be making a new rug later. You want to say? I'll be seeing you at the podcast.

I'll see you at the podcast. No, you won't. I've always dreamed about growing up and becoming a rug. But then we were gonna talk about sort of like famous, like retarded cinema killers. And again, and a lot of them are based off of Ed Gein. You know? A lot.

And again, the number one, the fucking patron saint of this podcast. Yeah. Like the man, the man himself, again, like this is someone who was born into his crimes, but was like Michael Jordan and the fact he was born into the environment and excelled in it because he was born to do it.

Yeah. I mean, to some degree Leatherface was more coddled and cared for than Ed Gein could ever imagine. You know, Leatherface, for all intents and purposes, you know, he was a little bit of a slow dude. He had a terrible face. But his family loved him. You know, and they gave him a job to do

and he did his job. And when he did his job, well, they clapped around the table. And he's a good boy, Leatherface. And then we... Let's give her to grandpa. Of course you give him to grandpa. Is that like what went down in your house?

Yeah. When you did well in school? Yeah, it was weird. It sounded like a dying lamb. Yeah. I saw that new picture of you in the wall. Oh, the fat one? God, man.

I was fatter than you. Yes. Much fatter. I was fatter than you, too, Marcus. I've looked like this since I was 12. You're creepy. It's nice to know your girlfriend is a quasi pedophile. A bit.

A bit. And then there's also Tiny from the Firefly family. Another retarded person. Again, fun name for a big guy. That guy's got some serious problems. And also in real life, that actor must have some serious problems. He does.

He has a lot of very serious problems. Well, he did. He passed. Yeah. Oh. Yes, he did. Yes, he did. He died.

He died? Yeah, he died like a year and a half ago. Of luck. Being huge and monstrous. They didn't have any makeup on the dude. That's how he looked. I mean, they put face makeup on him. Yeah, face makeup.

But his fingers were like that. He had gigantism. Or gigantism. Was he taller than you? Oh, yeah. He never stopped growing. Can we see how big he is? The internet access is working.

God damn it. He was something like 7. He was like 7-3 by the time he died. 7-4. He's one of those who never stopped growing, you know? And that's why his hands kept on moving the way they did. And they just got long and fucking weird and shit. Do you think anyone may love him?

Yeah, probably. Yeah, absolutely. Hollywood actor like that. But just for freakish purposes? For money. Like with, he gave them money and then they had sex. Like prostitutes, prostitutes had sex with them? Totally.

He could have had a wife. He could have. Yeah, he might have. You know, with freaks, they, you know, they find their people. Dude, women don't care what you look like. It's really kind of true. Freaks really do. Like, if you look, I mean, I know, like, there's one thing I know about circus freaks.

That and pyrotechnics. But circus freaks tend to find mates throughout life. Like, they tend to find each other. I think it's if you're just literally doing what you want to do. Freaks are beautiful people. But they can be so aggressive. They can be extremely aggressive. Yeah, but we're really aggressive, so that's nice for us.

But now when you meet me, I'm like, hi. I know. And then you were just yelling at your phone. I'm going to get a recorder. I need people to see the demon side of you. What's wrong with me? Henry is so nice. It's like, no, he is not nice.

I'm nice. Henry, you are a mean man. You yell at things. What are you talking about? Well, earlier, whenever you were trying to look up the egg gene quotes on your phone, you had a bit of a hissy fit. I was yelling at my phone. Yeah.

But I yell at things. I can yell and be nice. Yeah. Fuck you. Whoa, man. Whoa, man. Fuck you, Marcus. Don't fucking make me into a goddamn recliner.

I don't know. I feel like we've pretty much covered the retards. It's a bit of a quick episode. But I can't think of any other retarded people right now. I mean, besides us. Besides us. But we're not serial killers up to this point. I'm just, I just don't want one to kill me.

No. I think we're going to be fine. I once worked at this day camp with a high school girlfriend. We did this thing for volunteer. We had to do volunteer hours for this, like, program. We were in high school. And I volunteered at this place for the Emotionally Disabled. OK.

The thing was, I was put in the group of what they called the high functioning males. And they were all guys that were like, my age, you know, like 17 or so. And this one guy who was huge looked like a human wolf man. He was like a foot taller than me. They sit there, massive, massive, so sweet, you know. And there was a whole thing. You got to, you get this big sort of like talk of like, avoid sarcasm. They don't understand sarcasm.

OK. The one thing they love is wrestling because it's like, it's like one of those things. And he's not like, like he could have been, he was like totally normal. Like we were sat and we were talking and he was just like, really normal. And we're kind of like hanging out. And I was just like, why are you here, man? Why are you in this like special school? And he's like, I just got some trouble in my old school.

And I was like, what did you do? Like, why would you be here? He's like, I just like got into this fight with his kid and like, I broke his arms. Arms. I love that guy. He's like, you broke his arms. I mean, that's the thing. As a big guy, you just get punished for winning.

He won the fight. He should be awarded. I mean, he was also a rage monster. Well, don't make him angry. I mean, the thing is, I think it's like really easy to make him angry. Like it's also, that was the told, they kept wanting my phone number. Everyone wanted my phone number. So they call me on the phone.

Everyone's like, don't give him your number. Don't give him your number. And then finally I end up giving him my number. And they just would call and call and call and call. And then like, you know, and then it would just be like, I'd see them. They'd be like, you didn't pick up my phone call. You know, it's just like this like weird thing. They're all like, I don't know.

They're all like Wayne's ex-girlfriend from Wayne's world. Hey, Wayne. If you're not careful, I'm going to break up with you. It's a gun rack. I even own a gun. We can do way too much all day. Much less enough to necessitate a whole rack. I got to watch that movie.

It's so funny. God. No, just be careful when retards are going to mad to kill you. All right. Well, I think that's the lesson for the episode. Be careful around retards. They may or may not kill you. All right.

Well, good. Marcus, how do you feel? I feel good, Ben. How do you feel? I feel great. Henry. I'm not mad. Okay.

No. All right. Make sure the brown sauce in the packet is not chocolate. It's chocolate. No! There's bones in the chocolate. Ben! Make goos-d-lations!

Make goos-d-lations. Hyl-me! Okay. Good.