Last Podcast On The Left - Episode 389: Hadden Clark Part I - Mommy's Basement Bakery

Episode Date: November 3, 2019

It's time for a somewhat lesser-known Heavy Hitter with Hadden Clark, aka the Cross-Dressing Cannibal. Join us on the first of a two part series as we cover Hadden's psychotic childhood, his possible early murders and the absolutely brutal murder that was committed not by Hadden, but his brother. 

Hey, what's up everyone? How you doing? Ben Kissel here letting you know Hale Yourself America is available for sale go to HaleYourselfAmerica.com You can download the documentary. I hope you enjoy it and always remember Hale Yourselves! There's no place to escape to. This is the last time. On the left. Why? Love your glades. That's when the cannibalism started.

What was that? Oh god man, today I don't know what it is about these Borg9 panties I'm wearing today. Borg9? Oh my god, it's the wide flap models? Because the idea is that- What are you doing? You're wearing Ernest Borg9 panties? Have you seen the line? The Ernest Borg9 classy underwear line that he's doing? No.

It's for the lady with big under parts. It's scratchy, honestly, number one, it's scratchy. And the thong part is just giving me a fucking episode today. Wow, alright, well that's information I didn't know. I didn't know you had a Richard Speck side to you. You could see the line. Look, you can't see the panty line. It's like a Christmas vacation.

We have to reference it at least once a month. Hey, what's up everyone? How you doing? This is the last podcast. On the left, I am Ben, hanging out with Marcus. Hi. And then he flew all the way here from California. Henry Zabrowski, he's in studio here in New York City. Yep.

Man, oh man, oh man, I'm chafed. I am legit chafed. Well, we had a great opportunity. We want to thank everyone who allowed us to go to Heidi Klum's Halloween party, but that's why Henry is here. Oh yes. And so I thank them because now we get to spend more time together. That is nice.

Isn't that nice? All I know is that my time spent as a stress tester of the Ernest Borg9 panty line is coming to a close. Really? Because I did it just to get into the mindset of today's murderer. This guy, he loved silk almost more than he loved drinking human blood. This story? In a way that envies me.

I wish I loved the fabric more. Is it safe to say he's like BTK meets Richard Chase? No. Is that safe? Well, anyway. It's not unfair. Okay, it's not unfair. Who the heck are these boys talking about?

You might be wondering, we're talking about a dude, Haddon Clark. And this story, this is one of the weirder ones. It's a weird one, yeah. Haddon Clark, a.k.a. the cross-dressing cannibal was an American serial killer who provably killed two people in Maryland in the mid-80s and early 90s while his possible murder count could be as high as 13 committed in six different Northeastern states. Clark's nickname was the cross-dressing cannibal because at least one of his murders

was committed while Haddon was wearing ladies' clothing. A wig, flats, whole shebang, while the other proven murder saw him guzzle the blood of one of his victims. The way Marcus and I tried to describe him to each other was that he is like a supervillain that would be manipulated by a more powerful supervillain. He is a dangerous person, but this is a person that most likely would be beaten half the death by Batman on his way to the Joker. Okay, interesting.

It also sort of reminds me he's kind of like the Dustin Hoffman from the film Tootsie. I forgot that scene in Tootsie where Dustin Hoffman drank all the blood. But they cut it. It's in the Dutch version. I actually watched that movie growing up with my family and my dad at the end of the film. He did laugh, but at the end he gave us a 15-minute conversation. We had a 15-minute conversation about how it's wrong to cross-dress. Yeah, but then that didn't work out for him.

But this is legitimately, every true crime documentary I watched about him. Also, one of my favorite things about Haddon Clark is that he has a Born to Kill episode. And I haven't been able to see one of those in a while. But every single one of them being like, not only murder several people, but he always wore women's panties. They could not get over the fact that he liked women's underwear and dressing like a lady. And that's the least problematic thing about him. It's fine.

That's fine. That's totally fine. You could do whatever you want. Literally, in the 80s, it was on par with Triple Murder. Well, he does sort of look like, you know, he looks like a Turkish version of Lord Dern. But that's not his fault. That's just his genetics. And if he actually kind of worked on his outfits, he might have looked good.

I agree. See, at the time of his arrest, Haddon Clark was a highly unstable local character who chose to live in a tent in the woods outside of Rockville, Maryland. I choose to live in a tent. I love it. I don't need your walls. Because you know what walls rhyme with is balls. Good point.

Well, during the day, Haddon zipped around town on rollerblades doing odd jobs and calling himself the Rockville Rocket. Honestly, take a look at my calves. I love it. See how chiseled they are. Yeah, you're looking at them. Oh, man, I bet I could stack a whole bunch of titties to your hide if I could just get ahold of enough evil women.

See, Clark was a diagnosed paranoid schizophrenic, although the schizophrenia seems to be incidental to the serial killing. He did not kill out of some religious delusion like Joseph Callinger, nor did he kill to satisfy a pathological need like Richard Chase. Okay. As far as his two proven murders went, it seems like Haddon Clark killed for the age old petty motive of vengeance. I will have my revenge.

Really? But you know what? It seems to like there are specific revenges and there also seems to be with Haddon Clark a search for revenge against the world. And so again, his mental illness has nothing to do. I mean, it didn't help shit. No, but he's not murdering people because he's schizophrenic. Even just the idea of he, like he was diagnosed schizophrenic,

but I also think it was a way for them to just get him out of the hospital room. So he's literally the mom from Serial Mom? Kind of sorta. He's just murdering people because they wore white after Labor Day? No, no, no, no. He, see, well, that's the thing about it is that he didn't kill people that he believed had done him a bad turn. Rather Haddon Clark killed people close to those who wronged him.

Ooh. Yeah, because he wanted to put everyone else through the emotional ringer. He couldn't, for some reason, it's some sort of weird avoidance of conflict where he could not attack or confront the person who had wronged him. Rather, he killed someone close to that person. That is so crazy. He also is a very symbolic. A lot of this shit is very, very, again, it's just against society as a whole.

It's against every single thing that punished him as he went because Haddon Clark did not have an easy childhood and he did not have an easy adulthood in any way, shape, or form. He was very, he was interminably sick and highly dangerous at a young age. This is a person that is not unlike Ted Bundy or Richard Chase. This is a person that was just kind of a bomb waiting to go off. Oh, my, well, it wasn't symbolic to the people he killed. I'll tell you that.

Absolutely not. And I think the paranoid schizophrenia, a lot of times mental health professionals, especially back in like the 70s and 80s, paranoid schizophrenia is just kind of a catch-all diagnosis. It's just like we don't know what the fuck's wrong with him. He's obviously dangerous. There's something wrong with him. Let's just call him paranoid schizophrenic and just be done with it.

Because they all moved to that explanation, right? Ted Bundy had the entity. John Wayne Gacy had, what was his name? Richard Falco? No, Jack Hanley. Jack Hanley. Richard Falco was David Berkowitz's birth name. Yes, yes.

So these are the, they use these under the call. It's me, Dick Falco. Oh, God. I can't believe that I was, I wanted to be Richie Falco, but everybody just looked at my attitude and called me Dickie Falco. Oh. And the other thing that makes Haddon Clark dangerous

was that his killing a lot of times was just done on a whim. Like he just decided in that moment, I'm going to kill this person, which puts him firmly in the disorganized killer category, which those are the hardest serial killers to catch. He's a harlequin of mayhem. I put him more as a Mr. Zazz. That's it.

I like this. If we're going for Batman villains that get beaten up and like the first three issues, because it goes like Mr. Zazz, then he goes to the Penguin, then he goes to the Riddler, and then eventually at the end, you find out it was the Joker all along.

Who the hell is Mr. Zazz? But this thing is right, you're saying who the hell is Mr. Zazz? But if you were in the direct vicinity of Mr. Zazz, Mr. Zazz is going to be incredibly frightening and incredibly hard to deal with. But if you're Batman, you can just kick the shit out of him.

Mr. Zazz just sounds like one of the dudes who was supposed to come up with ideas for Marvel showed up late to work, and they're like, what's your idea, Stanley? Uh, Mr. Zazz! It's Mr. Zazz! Uh, first of all, Ben, Batman is a DC hero.

I don't care! I don't! Stanley, the best of my knowledge, rarely if ever worked for DC. Oh, okay. And your simple misgendering of a superhero. That's what I'm going to call that, is a misgendering of a superhero.

What that will do to you is make all of your other opinions completely invalid. Oh, you nerds! Well, see, even though Clark was schizophrenic, the biggest problem he had mentally was that he suffered from mild brain damage. But it was mild. It was the pace of brain damage.

But he also graduated from one of the top culinary schools in the nation, and he was a brilliant chess player. So what's the lie here? So what's the lie here? Is he an impenetrably insane person that has no control over his actions? Or, or is in some way,

does he kind of understand how to play the system just enough to keep himself for a while blameless? Because for a while it's like, it ain't me, it's the women inside me. And like, if you sell it creepy enough, which he did. Because what we have here is a pretty classic, classic, totally frightening human being

in person. And like, having him in the office, they all basically described him, having him in the interrogation room was an awful experience. Because every single thing he did, the way that one article described it, was that they said that he brought chaos

to every situation he was in and making it more difficult. No matter what it was that he was involved in, he had to be strapped to a chair. He was throwing shit around. He was pissing all over the place. I mean, he's a Tasmanian devil, which I totally understand,

because sometimes as a short person, you gotta go scorched earth. You do. Do we know what, how the, what was the food? Was it French? The food, he could cook pretty much anything. Cook anything.

Yeah, I mean, he had multiple, multiple chef's jobs over the years. And we'll get to all that later. I can make whipped cream, I can make stabbed cream. But it's hard to solely blame the brain damage for Haddon Clark's murders or the schizophrenia or any of that mental shit.

As we'll see, one of Haddon Clark's brothers was at least a psychopathic murderer and may have also been a serial killer. And he had no diagnosed mental illnesses whatsoever. Not even diagnosed. I don't. So what we're talking about here is a muesli,

a beautiful muesli of serial killer traits because the entire family was completely unstable. You just, if you add, like, if you're making a fucking dessert out of eggshells and you've already assumed that everyone is really excited for just eggshells on a plate, that's like a problem, first of all. And then you're like,

what do I actually need? I need some salt and some pepper, I need some pepper, I need some pepper, not one season. It's like, it's not getting better. I see. Okay.

His parents should have locked it up. No, no kids needed. My goodness. But before we get into the story of Haddon Clark and his family, let's acknowledge our source for this series, Born Evil by Adrian Havel, which is a perfectly competent true crime paperback

available wherever used paperbacks are sold. Great. If you want to, yeah, it's a fun afternoon read. Awesome. And also watch that Born to Kill, but again, a lot of true crime boys. So it's a lot of being like, can you even believe a maniac like this was allowed

to roam free? And so, but it just keeps showing goofy pictures of him in a wig going, ha, how are that beautiful? Narrator, could you please say that again? But can you add the panty line, please? Oh, you got it. Because we're supposed to add the panty line.

Yeah, I got to make sure to add the panty line each time. You're right. Okay. In a world where a man can wear women's panties. Oh, so jealous. There it is. So let's get into the life of Haddon Clark. Now, Haddon Clark did not come

from an underprivileged background. In fact, his lineage could be described as old school northeastern blue blood, going back hundreds of years in America on both sides. Clark was a Mayflower descendant, and his grandfather, Salis Skidmore Clark, was a member of the fraternity that also boasted Gerald Ford

and George H.W. Bush as members. Wait a second. Can you tell me the secret fraternity that held some of our most respected falling down presidents? They were, they're just their lineage. Hold serial killer DNA. No way. I think it's all the incest.

His grandmother Edith was also of rich stock. She attended Wesleyan University and founded the Sigma Kappa sorority, in addition to being a direct descendant of assumed revolutionary war hero, John Alfred. Why do you say assumed? Because I could not find any information on him being a revolutionary war hero on the internet.

I did find a pension form, but I could not find any stories about John Alfred, and I don't want to say he's a hero just because some fucking books as he is. That's right. No, he was a hero. He brought everyone snacks when they were real hungry on the battlefield.

What if he was like us? What would he was the Robin Williams of their Vietnam War? He brought a smile to people's faces. Good morning, Revolutionary War. In addition to all that, Silas Clark also fought in World War I, and was at one time the mayor of White Plains, New York, up in Westchester.

Oh, he was in White Plains. Eventually, though, Silas and Edith had a few kids, and it seems like this is where a thing started going awry for the Clark family. Yeah, the kids. The kids, always the kids. Yeah, it can be. Their oldest son, Haddon Clark the Elder,

was also a veteran and fought in both World War II and the Korean War. And in between the two wars, Haddon met and married his wife Flavia Scranton, known to her friends as Fliver or Fliv for short. Fliver sounds like an Ewok stripper name. Now coming stage, Fliver. Hold my drink.

You gotta go make it rain real quick. Do you want money, shells? I don't know. And right around the time that the Elder Haddon went to Korea, Fliver started birthing children. Just had nine of them. And all of those children, except one, was horrible in one way or another.

The two oldest boys were proven murderers while the youngest boy grew up to be a physically abusive pedophile. The only somewhat normal one was the youngest daughter, Allison, and she got the fuck away from her family the second she was able to leave the house and never look back. Can you imagine growing up

in the middle of the Firefly family? Like, you are legit. You're fine. You are fine. You are a normal human being. Wasn't that also in the Addams family? Didn't they have like a normal cousin or some shit that used to show up?

That's the monsters. That's the monsters, yeah. But she was nice. She was nice. But you show up. You are born into a family of psychopaths and they're looking at you to be the baby. They're like, you'll wear a crop top.

You're going to torture these cheerleaders with a crowbar. And you're like, I'm kind of afraid to even show my midsection. Like, I don't think I can do this. Now, part of the reason why the Clarks were so fucked up was because both Haddon the Elder and Fliver were both wildly unsatisfied with their lives and they regularly had drunken,

scream-and-slap fights in front of the kids. Both real bad drunks. See, Haddon the Elder had two faces. One was the respectable corporate chemist who spent his days doing things like improving the cling of plastic wrap and refining fire retardant carboning. Oh, well.

Yeah, he was just a corporate scientist. He was like, yeah, one of those guys that worked for like Dow Chemical, working on household items. He's like the guys that all died in the beginning of Ninja Turtles 2. Ooh. The private face, however,

was that of a tortured, unbalanced alcoholic. See, the Elder Haddon worked as a sort of contractor for these big chemical companies. And as such, he never got a piece of the pie on the household products he improved. He figured when he improved plastic wrap, plastic wrap money for the rest of his fucking life. But since he was just a contractor,

worked for hire, no one gave a shit, and he just kind of moved on to the next one. That's horrible. No. We're going to sign a contract. He did. I know, but he made the plastic wrap,

and then you know what? You use it every day. And then every day he's reminded, I did that. I did that. And if you don't get any money, it drives you mad. You have to be smarter with your contracts.

That's true. But do you think, we're going to talk, I guess, a little bit more about this later on, do you think that the chemicals had anything to do with the family? I don't know if he was able, unless he was working on plastic wrap at home,

unless he had like a little chemistry set in the basement, and Fliver was down there hanging out during the pregnancies. Maybe, but I don't know. I think it was just these two people, when they were put together, something about both their genes

and the family environment that they created, just for some reason was a monster factory. You cannot trust scientists sometimes. You look at Rick Moranis, and honey, I shrunk the kids, and then he blew them up. And so it's like, what are you doing down there?

That's fiction. What are you doing down there? It's not a documentary. You know that, right? I don't know. I saw it, and it was definitely real to me. Because the elder Haddon never got any of the royalties

from the plastic wrap or the carpeting, he saw this as a great injustice, and that rage was taken out on his family. But while the other kids seemed to merely be witnesses to the madness, Haddon Irving Clark, the younger, the subject of our series, got all the weird abuse from both of his parents.

See, Haddon was fucked right from the beginning. During his birth, the doctor was a little rough with the forceps. Oh my goodness. Or that's what Flever claimed. Because of this, Haddon was born with mild brain damage. He had peanut head syndrome.

Yeah. When the doctor squeezed your baby brain too hard with forceps and they make your head look like a sexy lady's body, like if you have an hourglass figure to your skull, it is not going to be good for the rest of your life. I grew up with a kid that went through a forceps incident, and he was totally fine.

Oh yeah? He just had a bit of a point. Yeah, so what is he doing now? I have no idea. Yeah? Oh, actually, I think I ran into him. I think the last time I saw him, he was a human screwdriver. Yeah.

You see, out there, he'd be like, I waved to people on the highway. That's not a job, Arnold. No, he works at the hardware store. He's doing fine. He's doing great. Is he sorting the nails, or is he operating the register?

He's chewing the nails. He had a booth in the back, but it was good, like the paint. Okay. Okay. I think it's fine. I think everyone is doing great. If you have a pointy head out there,

embrace your pointy head. Job's a job, and we had a wonderful conversation. That's great. Good job. I'm glad he didn't turn it ahead in Clark. But before we blame this whole thing on the doctor, all of the boys in the Clark family

were mean, angry, lawless little bastards who stole from their neighbors and destroyed property wherever they went. Because in addition to having just an unstable home life, because Haddon the Elder was doing all this contract work, they moved like every two months. Oh, so that's also like, I mean, just total instability at all corners of his life.

Yeah. So instead of dealing with her children, Fliver instead turned to hard liquor, boozing it up at home while masquerading as the perfect mother at PTA meetings and Boy Scout gatherings. I'm going to say this to all you Flivers out there that think that you think you're crushing into the PTA meeting when you're hammered.

You're not. You are not. We all know. We know you're hammered, because especially when you start like doing that lean, like leaning on a thing, but your face is leaning in the same way that your elbow is leaning,

and you just keep saying, I don't know about y'all, but I think it's about time for a cocktail. And you're like, you're not being cool anymore, like you are visibly hammered. But admittedly, these children sound like absolute fucking nightmares.

And one wonders, Ben, like you did, why the fuck her and her husband kept having kids? Because every single one was immediately awful. Well, maybe they were hammered. They had a lot of drunken sex. From the very start, Haddon in particular took pleasure in hurting others and never seemed to care about the difference

between right and wrong. Well, Haddon became such a terror that children would actually run the other way when they saw Haddon coming, because it seemed like violence was the only way that Haddon Clark knew how to communicate. Hey, you kids want to play how many bones you got? See, while other kids were learning how to read and write,

Haddon was still struggling to speak in complete sentences. And his parents did take him to professionals, but that sort of shit takes work outside of visits to the doctor. You can't just take the kid to the doctor twice a week and hope that the doctor does all the work. Both Haddon the Elder and Fliver just kind of half-assed the whole fucking thing. See, patterned carpets and floors

tended to confuse Haddon's brain. And this was the time of the patterned carpet. Oh, yeah, buddy. That's unfortunate. So Haddon constantly tripped and fell any time he came across a floor that wasn't a solid color. Ooh. Yikes. So because Haddon couldn't walk on carpet

that had any sort of pattern whatsoever, Fliver wrapped his head in padded tape and just sent him out into the world looking like a tiny, slightly hydrocephalic mummy. I'll tell you what, they say it's tragic, but just make it fashion. See, me and the mummy have one thing in common, y'all. We would both eat Brandon Frazier's asshole.

Wow. So his mom is really embarrassing him here. Oh, yeah, yeah. And when the other kids picked on Haddon for it because he's walking around town covered in padded tape and any time they picked on him, he found that what made him feel better was swift, violent revenge.

He would kidnap the other kids' pets, kill them, and place the carcasses on the kids' front porch a few days later. Jesus. Just be like, if you're one of the kids, be like, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, man. It's like when Cartman fed everyone, they're here to stand his own parents.

No, no, he fed Scott Tenerman. Oh, what happened? It's like, yeah, whatever. Cartman's feeding people parents. But he would go above and beyond. There's something about it. He had this fucking brutal mean streak from a very early age.

I mean, he got nothing to tell him otherwise. There was nothing else that made him feel any sort of better because his parents sort of, in a way, the tape around the head, for me, is it's not taken care of him. No, it's a half-assed solution. You're literally just trying to get this fucking over with. You're just being like, whatever.

You're treated as a nuisance. You don't want you in the house. You're a massive burden. And so he felt it immediately. So he just wanted, immediately, he kind of, that connected, where he's like, I'm going to make everybody feel my pain. Yeah. But the tape wasn't the only thing Fliver did to Haddon.

See, Haddon was the second child behind their eldest son, Bradfield Clark. Oh. They named them all, like, streets that you don't want to go on. Dude. They all sound like blue blood aristocrats. You're like, hello, my name's Haddon Clark. That's why we should have sound.

But instead, he's like, ah. He's got a joker grin. Yeah. Well, Haddon was expected to be a girl. So when Fliver had a few drinks, which was quite often, she doll up her son in pink dresses in frilly underwear. And as a result, Haddon Clark developed a preference for ladies' clothing that continues to this day.

And when his mother dressed him up in girls' clothing, she'd call him Kristen, which was the name his parents had originally chosen. Now, what? They didn't even name the girl Kristen. They named the girl Allison, because they'd already named Haddon Kristen. See, they already had it.

God, don't get it. Well, Haddon Clark, well, he got the, this is, it's not common. Being fascinated with your mom's clothes and stuff, like, they do say that I guess that is a part of the thing that connects it to just fetishistic obsession with female clothes. Like, if you have a sexual predilection,

sometimes it's connected to your mom and your relationship with your mom and all that kind of shit from back in the day. Haddon Clark, this dressing him up as a little girl, was not, it's not starting as, it doesn't, it did not start sexual. What it does is it's an erasing of Haddon Clark. When she dresses him up as a little girl and says that you were supposed to be, you were supposed to be Kristen.

You were never supposed to be Haddon. What that does is it's a constant subconscious message that you never should have existed. Yeah. And it is an extremely common thing in serial killers. I mean, we've seen this again and again. Like, you know, I know, I mean, he's not a serial killer, but still pretty fucked up, Charles Manson.

Like, his mother dressed him in little girl's clothing. Didn't Henry Lucas' mother also dress him up in clothing? It's just this weird thing that happens with mothers when they don't get the daughter. They try to make the son the daughter. The son doesn't want to be the daughter, and it just completely fucks him up. My mom always wanted the daughter, too.

And you should see the dresses that she would buy me. She would go into the dress bar. But the actual dress bar. Yeah, exactly. And I loved every second of it. No, but we... But what is it about it? I feel like it creates a hole in their personality.

Yeah. Of like, that's why they also, like, well, Charles Manson had a sense of grandeur, right, where he believed he should be a fucking folk singer, superstar, that some people, it drives them to places. But then if you were hopelessly mediocre, like Charles Manson, like Haddon Clark, you can't seem to get to the next level.

The thing that says, I am a person. I am Haddon Clark. And yes, I wear panties. You know what I mean? But I am also a cook. Well, even today, when Haddon Clark dresses up like a lady, he insists on going by the name Kristen Bluefin. Furthermore, he now claims that his multiple brutal murders,

which included children, were committed by either the mysterious Miss Bluefin, or by Kristen Bluefin's evil 16-year-old daughter, Nicole, both of whom live inside Haddon Clark. Ah, see, Mr. Clark, that's going to make it difficult because they have to go to jail. And so because of that, I know you didn't do it, Haddon. I know you didn't do it, Haddon.

That's not me. No, no, no. But they're inside of you? Yeah. In order, and let's, can you... But let me just put it this way. If you are going to arrest a serial killer, right, if you want to come out as a serial killer,

do you arrest the house that the serial killer lives in? No. I am an apartment building. I house all of the women from Clue. They're all inside of me. And that's the thing is that Haddon Clark also has a lady's voice, that he speaks in when he is Kristen Bluefin. He has a lady's voice.

He flirts with men. Insists that he's not a lesbian, but when he's Haddon Clark, he is straight. But when he is Kristen Bluefin, he prefers the company of men. He's like Andy Kaufman. Mm-hmm. He's very deep in character.

And the way they would describe it, it's unfortunately haunting because it's him. Because he would flutter his eyes quite a bit and he'd be like, like he'd laugh like an old rich lady and he had his weird wig half on his head as he's been like, you're simply darling to these two police officers and shit.

And you have to just be like, cool Haddon, cool. Can we go back to Haddon? I don't know, man. I'm sure there was just some drunk dude at a bar who was just so happy. He was just pretending. He would just pretend that it was all real and he's like, I know it's you Haddon,

but this is just the best conversation I've had with a lady in a long time. Fly from your grave. Fly from your grave. Fly from your grave. But back when Haddon was still a child, he found that it wasn't just his mother who was disappointed with his gender.

Haddon's father would sometimes join the game as well and call his son, Kristen, when Fliver dressed him up. So he's got both of his parents calling him Kristen, telling him you weren't supposed to be a boy, you're supposed to be a girl. Haddon's father also had another nickname for his son. And we mentioned this only because

it's absolutely central to the story. Haddon the Elder called his son the retard and called him this so much that the young boy believed that it was as much a part of his name as Clark. Oh my, so he's getting no validation whatsoever and combined with mental illness already. And that must have been made for a day at the DMV trying to change his license.

Oh yeah, that's hard. About the only relief Haddon got was when he was taken to a Baptist church when he was a boy and the pastor told him that God loved everyone. So to show how much he loved God back anytime Haddon would sing hymns, even to this day,

he sings them at the highest volume possible in a nasal falsetto. I've got a lot of work to do on me. That would make me laugh and laugh though if I was a kid. Oh man, because the evangelicals, they love to sing loud and bad. I'm gonna let it shine.

Just for hours and hours. Love it. But church did absolutely nothing to alleviate Haddon's violent tendencies. He would trap squirrels, raccoons, possebs, and sometimes skunks for his own private little zoo, which, that zoo tended to have a pretty high mortality rate. See, zoos need a lot of turnover.

So you can get a new guess. Why do you think zoo sushi sucks so much? Yeah, not good. About the only animal that survived in Haddon zoo for any meaningful period of time. Can I guess? Yes. An animal, I'm gonna say.

That Haddon Clark got along with exceptionally. Oh, okay. Maybe a turtle? No. Okay, rabbit? No. Is it big or small? It's medium size.

It's about the size of Puffin, actually. I feel like I'm just with a very disappointing farmer's son. Is it a pig? It's not a pig. Ah, what is it? It's a raccoon! Whoa! Yeah, he found a raccoon that had gotten hit by a car,

he nursed it back to health, and taught it how to sit on his head. And Haddon would ride around town on his bike with a little raccoon passenger clinging to his scalp. Hi, everybody, like my hat? My hat's got rabies, y'all. That's kind of cute, though. Also, this is not just specific to Haddon Clark.

Jeffrey Dahmer also had, I think it was a little bird named Dusty that he nursed back to health. It's weird that they kind of choose one. Yeah. It's like he chooses one again. It's a little game that he can play within his tiny inner universe of God, of who lives and who dies.

And I'm sure the moment that raccoon hurt him, because it was a wild fucking animal, the moment that raccoon got mad and bit him or scratched him, I'm sure Haddon Clark immediately broke its fucking neck. It's a dangerous hat. It's a dangerous hat to have. Not surprisingly, Haddon did not do well at school. He bounced from private schools to public schools

and back again, including a small private Christian school named the Jiminy Cricket Academy. See, my problem with the name of this school is that it's a place that's supposed to be for education, is that not only is it based upon a fictional character, but just scientifically, just the facts. A cricket cannot dance or sing. No, cannot.

No, it cannot. But even the smaller classroom sizes didn't help Haddon. He was held back twice in elementary school. He didn't graduate high school until he was 20 years old. Well, that's the strangest thing about being a bad student. They keep you there longer. I know, get me out of here. No, get out.

And by the time Haddon got to be a teenager, he was even more dangerous. Once, after mowing a neighbor's lawn, he was found inside the neighbor's house in her bedroom, wearing her nightgown. From there, he moved on to stealing his mother's lingerie and his sister's dolls. Who doesn't want their mother's sexy, sexy lingerie?

You know what it is? Highly, highly common among serial killers. It's very, very common, the stealing of, because we talk about with Jerry Brutus, too. He's obsessed with the lingerie. John Wayne Gacy. Yes. There's something about, because again,

it goes past curiosity. It's that first steps when you walk into your bedroom and you see a kid that the only way I could describe him is like you and McGregor from Trainspotting. He is shave and head, gaunt, big, crazy eyes, pointy ears, big snarling smile, just hanging out in your bedroom. He's not supposed to be in your bedroom. You give him $10 to mow your lawn.

He's in your house wearing your underwear. And he's just like, ha, this is nice. And for a second, you have to be like, huh, I didn't expect to see you here. You have to act kind of normal so that you don't kind of make this a bigger problem. So you just kind of act like it's this weird little episode. But then you start seeing these patterns where he is just

building this inner, other private life where the lady costume is not a friendly costume. Well, they should have known something was up because he mowed the lawn with his teeth. Yeah. There it is. There it is. Now we're back in business.

Then his first arrest came after he was caught peeping on another neighbor. And when Haddon had to be punished, his father would wait until Haddon came out of the bathtub. Then he would attack his son with a belt when Haddon was naked and at his most vulnerable. He surprised, attacked, punished his son. He would just wait behind the door and then as soon as his

son walked out naked, he'd just start hitting him with the belt. Good Lord. Did they read a book on how to be parents to raise a serial killer? Because they were doing a great job of raising a serial killer. It's something about hitting also, him being so vulnerable.

It's so purposefully done. Yeah. It is like they're following a series of tips of how to fucking create a murderer. This surprised violence may have led to Haddon's first murder in 1964 when Haddon was just 14 years old. Now we don't have any detail on the murder, nor do we have any facts to support Haddon's claim that he killed someone

for the first time when he was 14, but Haddon claims that he murdered a boy and that his father helped him cover up the crime. And that I don't really doubt that much. It's similar to Ted Bundy. What we'll see later on is that he always mixes in a little bit of the truth with all of his weird ass lies. It's a parent pickle.

You don't want your son to go to prison forever, but then he's also a murderer. Yeah. Really, about the only happy times in Haddon's childhood were when he would visit his grandparents on their retirement property in Cape Cod. Because actually his grandparents were supposedly extremely sweet, extremely nice people.

It really was something happened when Haddon Clark the Elder and Fliver got together. Both of them like came from perfectly nice, perfectly wonderful families, and then just when they two got, those two got together, it's just fucking awful from then on. But you know the grandpa was doing stuff every once in a while. He's like, I have an idea how to fix Haddon. Merry Christmas, Haddon.

I got you a football. This will allow you to really express yourself in a way that'll get all that energy out so you're not stealing pennies from your grandmother anymore. Oh, thanks. A football, huh? Stop trying to put it inside of yourself. All right?

Now you go outside and play with that like a normal person. I'm going to beat you when you get out of the shower just like your father does. But you know, on the other hand, his grandparents' property was also where Haddon claims to have buried multiple bodies later on. And at the very least, it is definitely where he buried his trophies.

They were fucking asking for it, huh? Having to grant children. Yeah, like what kind of trophies? Like bowling trophies or like soccer? Did he play soccer? Murder trophies. Murder trophies. Yeah, from the JV Murderland.

Oh, I see. Now, even though Bradfield, Allison, and Haddon's younger brother, Jeffrey, all went to college, Haddon was kind of stuck at home. But at the age of 20, right after he graduated high school, Haddon finally discovered his passion. You want to guess what it is? Oh, my God.

Oh, no, this is going to be, what career do you think Haddon had? Oh, let's see here. Optometrist. You think that Haddon Clark was an optometrist or a foot doctor? He could be a foot doctor. Have you heard anything at all about how he didn't

graduate high school until he's 20 years old? Maybe someone who, a drug tester for the NYPD. Like he just collected piss in a bucket? I don't know. No, I would say traffic cop. No, person. My father was a traffic cop. I don't know.

Chef. Oh, yes, he's a chef. He was a cook. Apparently a very competent one. The restaurant industry is really a home for the misfit. Yeah, it's crazy stuff out there. Now, his first idea was to start a bakery in his

parents' basement. That's going to be tough to get to, though. Yeah. Because he got to go to his parents' basement. There's nothing that sounds more enjoyable than going to have a nice breakfast scone at Mommy's basement bakery. But instead of indulging the basement bakery idea,

Fliver used her connections to get hadn't accepted at the Culinary Institute of America in Hyde Park. And I know, like, our listeners who are chefs right now are probably going, what the fuck? Because this is one of the most prestigious chef schools in the country. So legitimately, this shows the real power of wealth and connections in this country.

Oh, yeah. The fact that they had in Clark, serial killer, total unrepentant madman who would go on to drink blood and his own piss, living in a fucking tent. He went to one of the most prestigious cooking schools in the country. Well, I hope he didn't drink blood there. That's very unsanitary.

Well, we'll get to that. Well, surprisingly, he did OK. Oh, all right. There you go. He showed a particular talent for carving ice sculptures, and he was also very good at making little figures out of rendered animal fat. So he went to culinary school and created the two things

you can't eat, ice sculptures and rendered fat. It's big paying money for people to pay for those eccentric pieces of big, stupid, fancy parties. I know. And his spun sugar swans were said to be particularly beautiful. I love a good Haddon Clark sponge cake. Is it sponge cake?

Spun sugar. Spun sugar swan. Spun sugar swan. You need to watch Great British Bake Off. He does. I don't like it because they're not mean enough. I love it because they're not mean. That's why I like it.

I have enough mean in my life. I like to watch British people being nice to each other for an hour every Friday. And they're genuinely talented. Yeah. Yeah. Baking is not good television. It's wonderful television.

It's wonderful television. Cooking is good television. You were out voted here my sister. I don't know. You were off the island. Survivor. You remember that? I remember that.

That guy died. Yeah. That guy rude. He's fucking dead. The oven's doing all the work. My God. I don't want to talk about this. I'll check it out.

I'll check it out. The only real incident at the Culinary Institute was in Haddon got angry at someone and urinated into a large vat of mashed potatoes. If I knew it was that kind of party, I would have stuck my dick into mashed potatoes. Wow. That's a classic chef's revenge, though.

Yeah. I mean, Haddon Clark is like, if Tyler Durden was real, he would be Haddon Clark. Oh. Like, that's a sociopath's move, pissing in the mashed potatoes. Yeah. Yeah. Remember that.

Remember the end of that movie? That's crazy. You just want to spoil the ending of a 20-year-old film? No, he did good. He just said, that's crazy. Yeah. It was crazy. It was a crazy ending.

Fight club, yeah. That is great. That is really great. But Haddon Clark showed in this that he could actually fucking graduate. Yeah. Like, this is a difficult school. So on some level, like, he had genuine skills.

Yeah. And he could keep his shit together if he tried hard enough. No, was he medicated during this time? No. Oh, absolutely not. Just on fucking spun sugar swans. But Haddon discovered another passion while at culinary school. Haddon became obsessed with knives.

Oh, that's the one thing about culinary school. A lot of knives. Yeah. He collected every type of kitchen knife he could find, gave them all razor sharp edges, engraved his name on the blades, and stored them all in a long metal box that he always kept in his truck. But that's what chefs do. They have their knife box.

It's weird to keep it in your truck, though. You know, I think they will get some feedback on this because chefs are very close with their knives and they do take very, very good care of them. Which I understand. I think Haddon Clark got, like, super attached to his knives. Yeah. And I think that, you know, there is a line, I think, on some level,

and I think every chef, though, but I think when it makes a good chef, is the dallying on the line of, will I create a roast chicken dinner for everyone? Or will I kill the staff and everyone in this restaurant? Yeah. Because the tension, you can feel it, and be like, he's really teetering on the edge of something here, and I think that it's delicious.

Well, since Haddon hadn't had a degree from such a prestigious school, he had no problem getting hired at restaurants after graduation. The problem came, was in actually keeping those jobs. Mmm. Between 1974 and 1982, Haddon Clark was hired and fired from 14 different jobs. Like Nick Turner. Yeah.

Usually, Haddon got fired just for doing weird shit. Like when he got fired from a Portuguese restaurant in Massachusetts for chugging beef blood in the kitchen. Oh, you don't do it in the kitchen, you do it in the freezer. If you're going to be stealing food out of the kitchen, you always go to the freezer. I learned that at Pizza Hut. I tell you what, I dared everybody on the staff that I would do it,

and they ignored me, and they didn't even care that I dared, that I said that I could do it. But I said, I did it, I could do it. So I did it, and it didn't impress anybody. Everybody got mad, and I just got diarrhea. Aww. But right around the time that Haddon was starting his career as a chef, his father and Fliver finally got a divorce.

Ah. The younger Haddon blamed his mother's drinking, but Fliver turned it right back around and said she drank because of Haddon, telling him, quote, It's you who made me drink, and now I can't stop. Because I love it. You gotta take some personal responsibility. But also say thank you for giving her a super fun hobby.

Yeah, I don't know, it didn't seem to go well for her. But right before Haddon's parents got divorced, Haddon claims to have truly begun his career as a serial murderer. He claims that he was the man who murdered a still unidentified young woman known as the Lady of the Dunes. See, Haddon was an avid fisherman, and he said he came across this young woman in Massachusetts while he was on a fishing trip.

Now, according to forensics, the victim was nearly decapitated, part of her skull was crushed by a large tool, and someone had shoved a wooden implement into her vagina after death. Then the murderer pulled out all of her teeth, cut off both her hands and one forearm, and left the body on the dunes for someone else to find. And to this day, no one has any idea who she is.

Really? But the only clue to her identity came when Joe Hill, author of the fantastic comic Lock and Key, among other novels, like Heart Shape Box, and what was the other one, The Fireman? Everything that he does is great. I fucking love Joe Hill. And Nosferatu is fun,

but Heart Shape Box is my favorite of all of his work. And 20th Century Ghost is also great. Yeah, Lock and Key's my favorite. Joe Hill's fucking great. Love Lock and Key. But Joe Hill said that he recognized the face shown in the Lady of the Dunes reconstruction while he was watching Jaws.

This is a very fun piece of true crime trivia. Really? Apparently, a woman who resembles the reconstruction was an extra in one of the beach scenes in Jaws. She was wearing a blue bandana and jeans. And the Lady in the Dunes was found with a blue bandana and jeans tucked under her head. And this is not too terribly far-fetched.

Jaws was being filmed about 100 miles away in Martha's Vineyard right before the Lady of the Dunes was found. But this knowledge still didn't help with identification, and this is just kind of a fun little piece of true crime trivia. It did bit. But what Haddon Clark claims is that the blunt instrument used to bash in the skull of the Lady of the Dunes

was the handle of his fishing pole. And after he killed her and severed her hands, he used her fingers, he says, as experimental fishing bait. Yeah, because he put it out on the line and it's like going, come here, little fish. Just come here with the little come here motion. Right, I don't know if they'd respond to that, though. Don't tell me how to fucking fish!

Just tell me how to fish! I'm not telling you how to fish. I'm just saying it seems kind of strange. Do fish like fingers? I don't think they like. I don't think it worked out. I think he's just trying to be creepy. He's having fun with it. He's just trying to be creepy.

He's trying to say the word... Sounds like a, I don't know, like the sort of horror story like a fucking freshman in college would write. Right. Well, it's very common in serial killers. For you to trump up the details of the stories. There was an interesting detail that he did get correct that'll bring up in a little bit.

Yeah, and he said that he buried the rest of the body that he didn't use this experimental bait on Cape Cod, on his parents' land, on his grandparents' land. He even claims to know her identity, but refuses to divulge it because, as he said, law enforcement had treated him badly over the years. Aw. And we have absolutely no idea if Clark is telling the truth here.

In fact, he isn't even the only somewhat famous suspect. And honestly, the other suspect even makes a little more sense when you consider the mutilation done to the body post-mortem. Some think that the Lady of the Dunes might have been an Irish sex slave brought to America by the infamous mobster, Whitey Bulger. And her hands and teeth may have been removed ganglion-style to prevent identification.

Now, that does happen, but most of the time, they're just dumped out like what the serial killer that was murdering sex workers in New York City that they thought that might have been actually just a mob thing. A get low beach killer. Yeah, so that was just possibly just a burial site for people that owed money to the mob. Because we forget, back in the day,

that it was incredibly dangerous. Now, it's just on TV shows, and it's still in Staten Island, but you have to choose to live in Staten Island to be affected by the mob. Well, Whitey Bulger was said to dispose of bodies this way in order to get just to remove any sort, just to pretty much make a person disappear. And I think that that could also be a lot more likely

because of the cut up to the forearm. Because I would think the only reason for that, is possibly an identifying tattoo. Possibly. If she had a tattoo on her forearm, then that could be used to identify her. And whoever did this wanted to make sure that she was not identified,

because all of this was done post-mortem. Well, that's one of the good things with everyone having so many tattoos now. You're going to have some identifying marks. Yeah, for sure. That is really great. That's the best part about tattoos, is that they can really identify your dead fucking body

if they pull you out of a river. Really, the only evidence put forth for Haddon Clark being the killer, is that in 2004, Clark sent a letter to a friend claiming responsibility for the murder of the Lady of the Dunes, along with two drawings. Oh, I got another letter from Haddon. Oh, I wonder what it's going to say.

Oh, it smells like shit. Well, one of the drawings was a naked, handless woman laying on her stomach. And the other drawing was a map pointing to the location where the body was found. But the one, he had one fact that the cops hid from the newspapers, that he said that he, he said without provocation from the police,

which is the one thing that was strange about Haddon Clark's involvement in Lady of the Dunes. They said when they found her body, her hands were buried in the sand, like her hands were carried off, and they said it looked as if she was doing a push-up. Her wrists were buried in the sand. Yes, her wrists were buried in the sand.

Her hands were totally gone. Yes. Formally. Yes. Her stumps were in the sand. Yes. Doing very intensively. I just want to clarify.

Thank you. Thank you. Where are her hands used to be? Yes. Haddon Clark said that specifically. It's like, yeah, I chopped off her hands, and then I put her in a little position like she was doing a push-up.

Like, he said this thing to cops, and they're all like, weird. But right around the same time that Haddon was supposedly committing this murder, he was also making damn good money carving ice sculptures for banquet halls in Long Island.

Mr. Haddon Clark, Mr. Clark, could you make this ice sculpture a little bit different? It looks like a woman is being buried in the sand. Yeah, that's the whole what I did right here. You can see this is a no-handed lady sculpture. That's a no-handed lady. And I smashed a ball her teeth so that you couldn't even identify her

just from the sort of ice sculpture version of her. It's just because I'm just so anxious she was born with perfect breasts. You do give an embrace. I was just looking at the contract here. We requested a mermaid. A mermaid. Oh, I guess I'll just cut off her fucking feet, too.

Yeah, Haddon even got a six-week assignment as an ice sculptor at the 1980 Winter Olympics in Lake Placid. Won the Best in Show ribbon. Get the fuck out of here. He's very talented. What is going on? This story is too crazy.

By 1982, though, Haddon's bizarre behavior made him pretty much unemployable. So he moved in with fliver on a property in Meridan, Connecticut. But in March, Haddon, without provocation or explanation, just beat the fuck out of his mother. Just attacked her and beat her. Haddon Clark will never know a moment of peace

in his life ever. Every single part of his life was filled with conflict and with bullshit. And he was not innocent. He was a person that obviously would kind of ramp shit up. Always. But when it came to his mom, because now we're going to see, he kind of gets passed around by his family quite a bit.

And so she caught him stealing. Immediately, he just flips out because he can't... I think he has some kind of what you said before. He's kind of like an avoidant personality. So as soon as you start showing any sort of evidence of what his behavior actually is, he flips out. He does not like to be confronted with what he's doing.

Now, he was arrested, but the charges were dropped as they would be again and again. Rich kid. It's not even a rich kid thing. I don't know quite how to explain it, but he just sort of kept falling through the cracks because he would commit crimes against all sorts of people and then he just kept getting lenient judges.

I am going to say that you have backed your way into agreeing with me. Rich kid. But he was being defended by public defenders. And they weren't really getting a family history from him because a lot of times he would be living in a fucking tent in the woods and he would go up against the judge.

I don't know exactly what it is, but he just kept getting charges dropped. Either people feeling sorry for him or people think, well, he's got mental illness, so let's go easy on him. This is a controversial view I probably have, but I think that he has something like a mental handicap, like a little like a dial he can turn up.

And so when he puts himself in these situations, because you'll see this time and time again, he starts acting real stupid and he starts acting real like, I don't know what I was doing. Like he gets all childlike. They say that he would shake and cry every single time anybody confronted about anything.

I don't know why I didn't. He would change into these characters. But then they said that kind of almost Kaiser Soze like, that when he'd leave, he'd be, he'd like straighten up. Like he would, so there's somewhere in between. He's obviously very sick. But he also had some kind of conductor like control over the people inside of his brain.

He's manipulative, just like every other fucking, every serial killer is manipulative to some extent. Interesting. Fly from your grave. Fly from your grave. Well, because of Haddon's violent disposition, Fliver made Haddon sleep on a cot in the barn. And out there in the barn,

Haddon started getting weird with it. You know, it's always about the separation. As soon as a serial killer becomes Caroline in the city, out on his own, they just really, once they let their hair down, it's always bad. Well, Island Gossip had it that Haddon liked killing turtles. So you were close earlier. He supposedly kept the rotting shells

of so many slaughtered turtles arranged around his cot that you could smell the stench of decay from a hundred yards away. Now what a turtle ever do to him. I love a good turtle. I mean, turtles actually kind of freak me out a little bit. A little bit. But I say leave him alone.

Yeah, leave him alone. Of course leave him alone. But he just needed to kill something. He is the serial killer equivalent to Heathcliff. A little bit. A little bit. Now Haddon knew that he was losing it even further. So, since he couldn't get hired as a chef

and to give his life a bit of structure, Haddon Clark joined the United States Navy at the age of 29. Okay. Now Haddon thought that joining the Navy would give him all sorts of new skills for a new career in a new town. Everything's going to change around.

Absolutely. Between the commercials and the song from the village people, you're thinking you're going to be doing nothing but like learning how to tie knots and sucking dick and it's going to be so much fun. Right. The recruiter told him that was all but guaranteed. Yeah, you're going to get in there.

You're going to get a new job. Don't worry about it. You're not going to be a chef. You're going to be a Navy man. You're going to find out how to do all sorts of wonderful things and after you get out of the Navy, man, your life is going to turn around. And when he got out of boot camp,

he said, you're going to be a chef, mister. Honestly though, if he wasn't a super villain, it might have given some structure because it also does play upon his skills. You're hoping with serial killers, they're all born out of pure mediocrity like we talked before. So, the idea is that if he could actually maybe have really shown his skills

and figured out how to be the best Navy cook that's ever cooked an egg on a submarine, then maybe it would have been good for him, but you know. What do you really cook? What can you cook on those things? Anything. I mean, he's a galley chef.

Chef. Cook. Definitely a galley cook. So, I mean, he's cooking vats of things. Right. For many, many men. I mean, he's used to the very high-class culinary things. Yeah.

It's probably a bit of a blow to the ego. I don't know, man. If you ever watched, was it a restaurant emergency with the big guy? A restaurant impossible. Yep. That guy. I've seen that guy, yep.

That guy, what's his name? Big, strong guy. I want to say. Robert Irvine. Robert Irvine. Robert Irvine. He knows you can make food. You can make good amounts of food for a large group of people.

You just have to put a little bit of love, a little bit of care, and rightly source your ingredients, and you can make a whole bunch of people on a boat throw up. Yeah, that's true. Now, his first assignment was a nuclear aircraft carrier named the USS Carl Vinson. That's cool.

Yeah, and since it was nuclear, everyone on board, everyone, was supposed to have a classified clearance, but they just let Haddon stroll on board without one. Yay, I love to be on a boat. Excuse me, where are the missiles? I mean mess hall. I'm the new cook. I hope you guys like turtle meat.

But soon after his duty began, the other sailors discovered that Haddon wore women's panties under his uniform, and as a result, they started just beating the fuck out of him, whenever they could. He was transferred to another ship, but that one was no different from the first. He was transferred yet again,

but the stress of constant beatings, in addition to his previous mental problems, just got to be too much, and Haddon was kicked out of the Navy after two unspecified breakdowns at both a department store and an airport. Maybe he doesn't need to be in the military, although I would say they should have treated him

a little bit nicer. I don't care if you're wearing panties. It's about the flag on the uniform. I mean, I believe that that is completely... He didn't have an easy time of it, and he didn't deserve to get beat in the Navy. Absolutely not, no matter what the... I mean, they didn't know he was a serial killer.

They were beating him because he wore ladies' clothing. They didn't know he was... He deserves to get beat for being a serial killer, but not for wearing panty and bra. Women's panties. And so, with nowhere else to go, Haddon Clark moved into his brother, Jeff's basement, and found a job as a cook.

Just another cook job. Just regular cook job, yeah. And from what Jeff said, though, as bad as Haddon was before the Navy, he was worse when he got out, because he also picked up another head injury, because during one of those beatings, he'd gotten a severe concussion.

Geez. Well, two months after moving in with his brother, Haddon was arrested for shoplifting panties and bras. But Haddon Clark's proven crimes at that point were absolutely nothing compared to what his older brother, Bradfield, was about to do. Bradfield, he was the good son.

Yeah, this shining star. I mean, he was supposed to be... He was the example that all the rest of them were supposed to follow. Okay. I mean, he was smart enough to ride the new technology boom and do a good job in Silicon Valley. But he started in the late 70s by, like, 1984.

He had this great job at a company called Timeshare, as a software specialist. He was kind of like a Patrick Bateman. He's in this house, looking good, beautiful new house, fucking top of the pops in the 1980s computer scene, which is just, you know, like, you have a computer the size of a horse.

You ride it to your work. You take it back to your home. You had a cell phone the size of a fire hydrant. He was the coolest dude in the world. And, Marcus, I do have to say, Silicon Valley is in Miami, Florida. Silicon Valley. Oh, Silicon.

Oh, are we doing this? Are you doing this? Oh, are you Mr. Tweet? Oh, Mr. Tweet? Mr. Tweet? No, I'm Mr. Zass. No, kill him. Now, it seems like psychotic breakdowns

might run in the family, because soon after getting the job at Timeshare, Bradfield started becoming obsessed with the story of Grindel. You know the half-man, half-monster story? Well, it's the obsession. He became obsessed with John Gardner's Grindel, which is a story, it's a fucking incredible book,

but it's about the story of the monster Grindel that was destroyed by Beowulf, right? So it's this old-school Norse hero's tale about Beowulf killing this dragon Grindel. But this story is told from the perspective of Grindel as this monster that's essentially chained and kind of manipulated by an evil mother. So it's very scary to identify with Grindel.

Yeah, eventually. I mean, at first you kind of tertiary see it. As someone who was like a fat kid, I always was thinking about that, like that Goo Goo Doll song. I was always being like, Don't want the world to see me. Oh, they wouldn't understand if they did. I felt like the hunchback of Notre Dame,

which I could see why you think that when you're 15. But when you're already a millionaire in the 1980s computer scene, you need to identify with Grindel. Yeah, I have to say, I listened to that Stain song too much. Remember the Stain song? But it's just because I was so tall,

I had to stand in the back. Weird. And he also just started walking around the office, mumbling under his breath, garbling his speech. But despite this, Bradfield managed to woo a married co-worker named Trish Mack into a bit of office hanky-panky. Ooh, hanky-panky.

Do you remember the movie Scrooge? Of course. Do you remember the Christmas party in Scrooge? Yeah. The girl that was taking her like photocopying the pictures of her panties in front of the... I see her as that, where it was like full 80s. She's like, you should come over.

We can have some Chinese food. And then she goes over there and he's Grindel now. Uh-oh. Yeah. Well, a bit of heavy petting after hours turned into a dinner invitation. And on July 20th, 1984, Trish came over to Bradfield's garden apartment for dinner

while her husband was out of town. For the meal, Bradfield barbecued lamb out in his garden and afterwards, both he and Trish started drinking heavily, moving from beers to scotch and sodas to gin and tonics before sharing, appropriately, a nice bottle of Chianti. That is very appropriate. I wonder why? The drinking eventually turned into more heavy petting,

but when Trish took off her shirt, Bradfield started biting at her breast. And she asked him to stop because she didn't want evidence of her infidelity because remember, she was married. But Bradfield wouldn't, so she slapped him. In response, Bradfield closed fist, punched Trish in the face, went back down to her breast and ripped her nipple off with his teeth.

Jesus. Think about this. No escalation. Unless there was previous shit in his life, which, I mean, it speaks to what we're as we're going to roll through, which is essentially gold star territory, as we roll through the rest of this crime, you wonder where the fuck this impulse came from.

Yeah. Then, as she screamed on the floor, Bradfield choked her and bashed her head into the cinder blocks he used as bookshelves until she lost consciousness. And not knowing what to do next, he just grabbed a pack of smokes and went for a little stroll around the old town of Los Gatos, California, where he lived. By the time he got back, Trish Mack had almost bled out on his carpet.

So Bradfield decided to take it further. He dragged her to his bathtub, removed all her clothes, and completely sliced off one of her breasts. And it's not known for sure if she was still alive at this point, but the blood spatter in the bathroom on the walls suggests that her heart was probably still pumping blood when Bradfield did this. Damn.

Not conscious, but still alive. Whether she was alive or not, Bradfield then took the breast outside where he'd been barbecuing lamb just hours before, tossed it on the grill, as Trish bled out and died in his bathtub. Then after grilling the breast until it turned black, Bradfield Clark put it on a plate and ate it.

Oh, my. And this is the side character in this story? This is the brother of the serial killer. And because if it was hadn't, he would have known that that's called a char. Because of his time. That's true. Afterward, Bradfield returned to the bathroom, poured rubbing alcohol

over Trish's pubic hair and lit her genitals on fire. Seemingly done with experimentation, Bradfield changed clothes. Dressed only in jorts, he began the disposal of the body. The only thing that, again, it's like, if he just put on Huey Lewis in the news, if he put on sports, this is American psychology. Maybe he did. Who knows? Working until dawn, Bradfield used a 7-inch deboning knife

to dismember Trish Mac's body into 11 pieces. He twisted off appendages, he divided the torso horizontally, and he removed the head. After he was done, he shoved the parts and garbage bags and stored them in his closet. About the act of dismemberment, Bradfield said, quote, I was less than thrilled by the whole experience. Less than thrilled, huh?

And there's a lot of feelings underneath thrilled. Yeah, I guess so. But the next night, Bradfield almost did it again. Except this time, he'd invited two women to his house. The blood stains from when Bradfield had ripped off Trish's nipples and when he bashed her head against the bookshelf, they were still quite clear on the carpet. But the women just assumed he'd spilled red wine.

Well, what they said, they thought that they might have been the examples of his bachelor lifestyle, which then you start to think, how many times have they gone over to a single dude's house just to find pools of dried blood everywhere? You know bachelors. And the dismembered body was still in the fucking closet in 11 pieces while they were sitting on the couch.

All while Bradfield prepared a nice chicken dinner. But Bradfield found that he couldn't even go through with dinner, much less killing two more people. It's like, do you guys want some breasts? Are you okay, dude? Yeah, I just don't know if you want some of this juicy breasts. After setting out the chicken dinners on TV trays, he found that Bood made him sick.

So, telling the women he had a bug, he went to the bathroom and started loudly vomiting. And that's when the ladies took the cue to leave. You and your girlfriend go to this eligible bachelor's house. He makes you chicken dinners like, this is incredible, and you're both talking about who's going to date him. And then he lights the candles, just here like, he looks like a lady.

Playing in the background, he's just like, guys, excuse me for one moment, please enjoy yourselves. I gave him Kianti and the fridge. I had a bottle open from the other night. Excuse me, I have to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back. You just stay right there, I got no more soap coming. I think we should go.

After they were gone, Bradfield got to the task of getting rid of the body. He wheeled the corpse bags out to his Dotson in a shopping cart and fit as much as he could in the trunk. And what didn't fit went into two trash cans at opposite sides of his apartment complex. Following that, he went to the store, bought some wool-like carpet cleaner,

and scrubbed the blood stains out of his carpet as best as he could. Did he also get some new Coke? Did he go to the Reebok store and get some afrin? Then the next afternoon, Newprint, little yellow, different. Then the next afternoon, the detectives showed up because Trish had told someone,

hey, I'm gonna go to Bradfield's house for dinner tonight. Now, Bradfield had actually done a hell of a job cleaning up and he told the cops she just didn't show up. I haven't seen her since OSR at work a few days ago, but I've been at home with a bit of a bug. And so the detectives searched the apartment, pretty much gave him the all clear. But Bradfield couldn't deal with the pressure.

So pretty soon after the cops left, he tried committing suicide by stabbing himself to death. But only the stab wound to the stomach was serious. And after trying to slit an artery in his neck, Bradfield just passed out. When he woke up, he called an ambulance and passed out again on the way to the hospital. When he woke up, two cops were standing over him.

They asked him, do you know Trish Mack? And he immediately said, she's dead, she's in the trunk of my car. Just confessed. But showed no remorse whatsoever. About the closest he came to remorse was this statement that he made about the murder. Well, it definitely is the strangest thing

to ever happen to me. How do you think she feels? It's such a kissal response to murder. Weird. Weird, wild stuff. What? But since this was 1984, the cops decided to focus on an issue of heavy metal magazine

found in Bradfield's apartment as a way to explain away the crime. I hate this shit. It's always, it's so dumb. Cause it's 1984. This is satanic panic, that everyone's looking for something to blame. And a particular interest was a cartoon.

And this is seriously what the cops thought was the motive for the crime, or at the very least the inspiration. It was a cartoon of an octopus chasing a woman and grabbing at her. And then once the octopus caught the woman, the story cut to a couple of aliens. The aliens who had sexed the octopus on the woman in the first place,

discussing cutting the woman up. You see, the aliens in this question are the parents of the assailant. And the assailant is the octopus. And the woman stands for, get this, a lady. A murder. An octopus, you see, simply just because they have eight arms. There are eight factions to the human personality. As you can see,

eight umbrellas for each man in my book by Dr. Addison Mifflin. You see it right here. Each person has a personality and umbrella. And it seems Bradfield's personality was a murky brown. Oh, seems like it. So they blamed it on a comic strip. Yeah, they leaned real hard on this octopus cartoon

when they were trying to discern a motive. Like even after Bradfield already confessed to the crime and said like, yeah, I killed her. Even after that, the cops still brought the heavy metal magazine into the interrogation room and was like, see that? What do you think about that right there? And he just goes, oh, wow. Yeah.

Yep. Well, what are you supposed to say? Yeah, I'm the octopus. You get it? But Bradfield's mother, Fliver, decided she didn't want to think about it at all. Fliver refused to even speak of the murder directly and would only refer to the murder as, quote,

the mess in California. It really was a mess. It was a mess, yeah. But according to Bradfield's ex-wife, it is possible that this was not his only murder. It doesn't sound like it. It sounds like someone who is deep into escalation territory. Yeah.

She said that Bradfield confessed to her that he had murdered and dismembered three women before Trish match. Jesus. Two in Massachusetts and one in New York state. And seeing how much experimentation Bradfield practiced in the post-mortem hours, this is not ridiculous to think about.

No, he jumped right into that to the Trish Mack murder. Yeah, this is not ridiculous at all. I didn't laugh once. No, no, no. He said that the reason why he was able to dismember the body so well, he said it was because his father had taught him how to clean a deer when he was a kid. His father used to take him hunting all the time,

so he learned how to dismember a carcass. This is also what Cadence Clark will say later on. They all shift the blame to this idea of it because they went hunting with father. Yeah. But the fact that he was able to quite deftly turn this body into 11 disposable pieces and also the experimentation of the immediate biting off

of the nipple, eating a breast, lighting the pubic hair on fire. All of this stuff points towards intense escalation. It might not be. Well, he's definitely not deescalating. If he murdered the other women by putting them on a roller coaster that had different knives that would come out like... Or if he married her and waited for 35 years and just slowly killed her with a sense of ennui,

like just making the house sad. That's a different type of murder. And this is the brother of the serial killer we are covering today. It's a full family. It's a family affair today. But pretty soon after Bradfield Clark committed his last murder, Haddon Clark was about to commit the first murder that actually can be proved.

And that's where we'll pick back up next week for the conclusion to this series. Haddon Clark? My goodness. I can't believe this man is more well known. Haddon Clark is an interesting character because you know what it is. You just got it.

There's so many serial killers. There's just so many of them. Haddon Clark is dead. As soon as you peel off the top layer, you're like, this guy is a fucking monster from a horror film. And then you look at his whole family. They are all the same exact way. This is a lot of blood.

And I'll tell you what, next week it does not get less bloody than this. Next week we're going to see all of Haddon Clark's crimes. We're going to see what happens when you go totally fucking off the reservation, which Haddon Clark kind of allows himself to do. He goes full Mr. Zazz. To clarify it for you Ben,

Mr. Zazz was Batman's serial killer villain. He's got all the marks. He's got marks for every victim that he's killed on his body. And he's escaping from Arkham. So much. So much. They got to get different like locks on the door. Something.

They got to figure that out. But on the other hand, Mr. Zazz is also the guy like when Batman walks into Arkham, Mr. Zazz is always the one that like leans up from his cell and goes like, hey Batman, I'm Mr. Zazz. You remember me? Ha! And then Batman makes a quip and then he keeps walking. Yeah.

But sometimes he beats him up before he walks. Yeah. You slap him in the face. He'll be like, it's just nice that you still pay attention to the Batman. Honestly, it's just like a big deal that I mean, even like still in the room with you. Love your work.

Love what you do. I love that. All right, everyone. Well, thank you all so much for listening. And we are excited to see you on the road here in the upcoming future. And of course, November 8th, Henry and I will be in Washington, D.C.

for a little side stories conversation. We're going to blab. And we are going to have a lot of fun. A very well planned show, highly orchestrated. A lot of tech is involved. A lot of tech. We're rolling in. It's going to be like the big top.

It's like, oh, it's going to be like Cirque du Soleil. Neil Patrick Harris is now doing a little big top show here in New York. So maybe we'll get him. We can go. I'll call him. I'll call Neil. Yeah, we can call him.

Did you guys do a lot of prep? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, buddy. Thanks so much. Are you guys discovering how much work I really do? We kind of already knew. Yeah.

Yeah. Yes, and thanks to everyone who came out and saw the Hail Yourself screening in Nashville, Tennessee. That was very sweet of everyone. So thank you. Yeah. And we've got a bunch of shows throughout the rest of the year. We're going to be doing Portland, Maine on the 21st.

Northampton, Massachusetts on the 22nd. Buffalo, New York on the 23rd. And those are all in November, of course. And I believe they're going to release more. They will release. They have some held. They have some held? Great.

I don't know. They might do that a couple of days before. Maybe. So be sure to check shit out there. Then in December, we're going to be doing Toronto, Detroit, and Columbus, Ohio on December 5th, 6th, and 7th. And then the 13th. Friday, the 13th.

December. Woo. 13th. Oh, no. Wait, two shows that night. That is going to be so much fun. Also remember that no VIP for that, but we're taping our live show. So you'll be a part of our bullshit permanently.

And so yeah, I'm certain if you wear some kind of fun costume or something, you can even end up in the special. Maybe. Maybe. I don't know. Dress is John Panette. Love John Panette. Oh, I miss him.

I do miss him. He was funny. All right, everyone. Thank you all so much for listening. Hale yourself. How do you mean? McGustillations. Hale me.

And I'm telling you boys, man, wear those panties. Just don't kill people. Just don't. The killing is the problem. That's the real problem. Panties are just cozy. Try to purchase the panties or get inherited the panties from your grandmother. Oh, you don't want inherited panties.

And a bunch of vintage panties from your Aunt Nancy or something. That'd be kind of fun. I estate sale panties. Oh, I don't know. And that way they're good and dusty. Mm-hmm.