Last Podcast On The Left - Episode 41: Our Psychic Powers

Episode Date: February 17, 2015

The boys test their psychic abilities. The results...are disturbing!

There's no place to escape to this is the last on the left Get the three most Non-morning people in the world break wake up in the morning. Uh-huh. I'm to come do a podcast It's a new Japanese game show cause I don't want to be awake right now We're good. Oh, hey everybody. Welcome to last podcast on the left. That is Marcus Parks. Hello You got a little sleight in your eye Marcus your tired little boy. Yeah, I stayed up too late playing Castlevania Symphony of the night Oh, that's cool. If there was any if there was any excuse I think that I could use it would be That's why Castlevania Symphony of the night. Well, I had to fucking defeat Richter Belmont to get to the inverted castle

You always gotta defeat that asshole Well, he was possessed. Oh, yeah, that'll happen. I'm Ben and then there's Henry Mischelio Henry Zabrowski. Oh, welcome to Jamaica. Oh, I eat a mango. I eat a mongo like you've got to make it eat a hamburger That's a lot of it. It was a lot of it. It was a surprise that came out of you We're today. We're only have been told that the alien agendas episode was very confusing Yeah We were all confused. I Mean, I yeah, I think we definitely we mind fuck some people there, man

Maybe maybe yeah, maybe they just got to wrap their brains around it. Yeah, maybe we got to think bigger I think I need to watch more episodes of ancient aliens. Yeah, and then you'll fucking be just catch up Yeah, you got to catch up with us. This is it. This is not for fucking beginners. This is an expert level podcast Absolutely, man. No, and we were experts on that program We laid out all the information in an orderly manner everything made perfect sense So if you didn't understand it, that is your fault my friend to you. You're you're an idiot get it done Go back to school today. We're gonna talk about psychic abilities What am I thinking right now Henry, what am I thinking right now? You're thinking about food. Yeah, always thinking about food

You nailed it now Psychic abilities some scientists have called them dubious, but some psychic scientists have said psychic powers are real very real Often used by detectives to find bodies of hookers that have been killed by serial killers You just say you just I have to start over you and you have to do it Don't look at the picture Picture test at the later later on in the episode. All right, so psychic powers There are many people who believe that all humans are psychic some people do believe that you know many many many many many People eight people a lot of people is a lot of people want to psychic

There was a lot of what boils down to what are the actual official? Psychic abilities you have telekinesis which is the movement of Objects or the manipulation because there's also what I've learned There's macro and micro telekinesis in which you can either control particles what you couldn't tell if you could okay So I think I have that one. Yeah. Yeah, and then macro telekinesis, which is you know You talk to these around you can make girls shoot blood other proceeds and stuff like that I don't know if that's actually true what I just said, but that's that would be crazy ability

I think that's true. Yes. I had an uncle who had that power make women shoot blood other process Yeah, we used to do it every family reunion. Oh once a month. That's just Texas rape Then there is actually Texas rape, I think it's just Texas love, you know, I mean it depends on I mean It's what's the context of the sex that she didn't like it. Yeah. Yeah, you know Some but some people, you know, sometimes it's just about like it's a bitter medicine, you know I mean spoon sugar. That's medicine go down. Yeah Right, sometimes you got to buy her a hot dog before you force her to have sex sometimes the medicine's the date wait You're a date rape drug. Yeah, or a date wave drug depending on how cute you are. I

Just gave with a date wave drug. No, we can't charge you with rape. You're adorable Get out of here. You my name's Tommy buttons. I'm buttons like they wait to up. Oh, okay, Tommy Then there is remote viewing which is the the idea of So closely a link to clairvoyance, which is you can see events outside of your body without the use of intermediary That's a big thing that there is a general misunderstanding of psychic abilities is that People would like want to lump clairvoyance into a bunch of different things But clairvoyance is more of the seeing of things that are yet to come You know, I mean that's kind of ideas that you get a flash and the idea is that it comes that that information comes from the event itself

Where it's like if you are a medium, you know, and you channel, you know, like channeling is different than remote viewing Channeling is you have a spirit guy that helps you see what you're doing and it and explains the afterlife to you And then you have people that you know and that also breaks down to channeling can also be like physical with the idea of like You touch an object and you can tell the history of the object or like who has handled the object And then there's like a playboy like that issue of Bupman that we have here in the studio. Yes Yes, I have handled it Marcus has handled it. Yeah, I'd like to many a time. I'd like to take a look at it. I Can't see it right now. I think Marcus, but I got it out of here No, I have to hide it whenever the boss comes in

All right, that's fine. Do I yeah, well listen to the podcast I know that but that doesn't mean that she wants to see it. I guess everyone wants to see that You have telepathy, which is the reading of other people's thoughts Which is thank God, we don't have it. I don't want to know him I know I don't want anyone to know my thoughts. No one wants to know your thoughts No, because they're gross the words that you let escape are so nice compared to the things that you actually have So dark and weird. Yeah, absolutely uncomfortable and awkward. Yeah when I was crazy I was convinced that everyone could read my thoughts. Well, that's also a sort of egomania

Mania and you were just screaming in the middle of the town square Fuck how do they know I want to fuck it wasn't really that everyone could read my thoughts It was that there were a few people around who could read thoughts But they weren't telling anybody that they could read thoughts But they could just read a few people like they could read everyone's thoughts So there was like is that guy is that guy one of them? Yeah, that's crazy Is that guy one of them that guy's that's full great egg that guy's one of the guys that can read people's thoughts I know what and he's reading my thoughts right now. Stop fucking reading my thoughts man. It's it's over now

Yeah, that was full on it's over now. It's fine now. Yeah, that was crazy time. No, no, I'm medicated. It's good That's good. I mean, yeah, there are people that could actually read people's thoughts in your community though Oh, no, this happened up here, too. Oh, yeah, you never know where they are It's important to keep an ear out and an eye out in a good brain You got to keep your brain flexed looking for people trying to read all your thoughts. Mm-hmm. I've heard that That's good. Yes, that makes sense. And that's a little so there's a couple of things that you can say Yeah, I'm well, let's first keep going like a little bit more into general psychic abilities right right before we go into the Because the idea is, you know, everyone's a little bit psychic. Mm-hmm. You know, I've ever had a

You know a moment when you're like yeah, you know Don't go on that plane and then you know because you knew about 9-11 because you put the bomb on like you were George Bush And you knew about 9-11 you knew not to take a cross-country flight that day because you knew that you were gonna use it to make Two wars sure Or you know don't eat that burger. Yeah, I'm gonna get fat if I eat the burger. That's I mean that's different That's true of that's like that's like a problem with weight. Yeah, that's a problem with your weight There's cheese in that burger. Oh Don't have it. I'm just trying to think there was another psychic ability

I was just about to talk about but then I lost it. Well, there is that that's it. I guess we're done here I guess we're fucking done. I have no brain and capacity this morning We were on clairvoyance and then are you done with clairvoyance now clairvoyance? I talked about telepathy Sentence get Clara sentience and Claire audience, which is the idea of that all of that is different abilities It's like there that's another thing of people to realize about psychic abilities is that sometimes it's not just like an image That will shoot in your head. Sometimes it's like you'll hear a voice or you'll get a feeling or like you can be smell Right. I hate to be that we're just like all you do is smell the farts of the future. You know, it's just like ooh That's a bad one. I bet it's from Cleveland. Yeah, what are they eating in the future?

Oh, let's be you hot dogs and chili. Oh, that sounds pretty great. I like that Yeah, absolutely. Um with another general psychic ability Well, yeah, that's all falls into the same thing. It's it's premonition to the future and then there's just straight up, you know, oh and then there's the Out-of-body experience is an astral project. Yeah, there's a lot of people that believe that right before you die like the people get visited by people like either in dreams or or in their house by people who die or There are people who kind of feel the ability coming along. There's a story of the

writer and philosopher Bernard Shaw was with this guy who was like a famous medium at the time and he like of course as As which again again, apparently also happened in the 1980s, which is really interesting because 1890s or so there was a Gigantic finance of a fascination with mediumship. Yeah, I'm like people traveling. We already did that I think we've covered this before the last time we talked about psychics or whatever It's just like, you know, and it became a huge stage show thing and these guys became like rock stars so these writers and actors at the time and This one guy believes him was like Pico. So something blah blah blah. I forget what it

I forget what his full name is he go he was hanging out with Bernard Shaw and it's a you know And he as he was leaving he like doffed his top hat and it was just like but odd just so you know You may be seeing me later this evening, but don't say hello because I will not be able to hear you and Bernard's like Okay, yeah, he's just like just remember I will be coming later This evening and then like left and then apparently Bernard Shaw is sitting in his night dress Because men wore that different times different time. That's fine. And he's sitting there eating his gob of mustard and a bit of cheese People still do that again weird weird things that people used to do yeah, and Pico just showed up in His room like looking all confused and then the next and then disappeared and then at the end it was like Bernard asked him

It's like how did you do that? How did you show up in room? And he's like I don't quite know That's kind of and there's also many stories of people of hearing two other were masturbated in the corner You're jacking off to me all night, but that is a very that is a way to but do not say hello But I will not be able to hear you Far too far too busy to laugh It's so funny it just you know, but the there is there's something about that I think we've touched upon this one topic before about how we're you know human beings may is may well All be connected by some sort of like network. That's physical, you know, it's like right because our brains run electrical impulses and

Because we don't know what the thoughts are we don't know what thoughts in our brain are we don't know what memory is We don't know what consciousness is we're getting there We're sort of getting there But still lots of guesses and it's like and it still will probably turn out that there is like a hamster on the center of our brain We're working levers, you know Real science Coffee, I imagine my brain is made of goblins. I hope so made out of ice cream

But our idea, you know and that what psychic ability is is like momentarily becoming Conscious of that connection and being able to manipulate it, you know And that you that at some point those those thoughts kind of float out in the ether and can be picked up like we're a bunch of Antenna, I mean it makes sense Wi-Fi exists and I think that we there's no reason to believe it telekinesis cannot and all and I really believe it I want to humans are doing with technology is Slowly the idea is to mirror what's going on in real life and then all Wi-Fi is again is a just an example of It's a physicalization of our mental connection, right?

And that's just gonna get it's gonna it's gonna get more and more obvious as time goes I Want to do a test with you Henry what we're gonna say Marcus well What part of the what we're saying learning about the human brain is that it's electrodes mostly it's all electricity And you know if we can somehow find a way to get the brain Electricity out and be able to project that or as we've learned from a previous episode that that power could be called Satan That power could be called Satan himself. Yes, it could and that I I'm not a person who necessarily believes I have psychic ability Right, and I don't think I have any sort of psychic ability. I think that That part has been dampened by weed and hamburgers. Yes

Lot of booze, but I do believe that the power of Satan will help me gain some true powers And I think we're gonna try that today. Let's try it out. So this is the first test. We're gonna do. It's very simple Zero through nine Henry's got to guess the number that I'm thinking now you I just have to do this like 20 times Just 20 times and then it's how many 20 times how many out of 20 means you got to get over 50% Sure, okay, so let's try some daily zero to nine zero to nine Let's try an information first repeat after me every day and in every way I'm getting better and better and I'm becoming more and more now that is from the Beatles that is fine Those were a great every day and in every way. I'm getting better and better. I am becoming more and more

Do you feel more psychic? No, okay good. We'll do one. I do another one. You can do one more Okay, now this one is now because this idea that positive attitude will increase your psychic ability. Ah, this is this is we've we We read a bunch of stuff talking about how to boost your psychic abilities and this is one of the way repeat these mantras That's right. Okay. Here's one. I am beautiful and loved right now for I accept and express the goodness Which resides within me? I am beautiful and loved right now right now and I accept and And express the goodness the goodness which resides in within me that were goodness Which resides inside of me inside within within I'm sorry in within within me So let's redo that one from the top because you fucked it up at the end

Okay, I am beautiful and loved right now Sorry accepted express the goodness which resides within me. No, this is supposed to make me more psychic This is no, it's yeah, this is exactly how you become more psychic I am beautiful and loved right now right now and I accept and express the Love the goodness. Okay, you know what? We're just gonna go right to the test. Let's just do this Psychic zero three nine. I'm gonna write down number one What do you got the number one?

Okay, okay, number two three Okay, interesting number three seven. Okay number four nine. All right, two Okay, three. Okay, zero. Okay, five. Okay, six. Okay, seven. Okay, five Okay, eight. Okay, nine. Okay, one. Okay, two interesting Zero zero. How am I doing? Let me just get quick tally one two three four five six seven eight nine ten eleven twelve thirteen fourteen Have you not have you not written your number? No, I have my number 18 no wait. No, no, I'm sorry. That's the number nine. Okay, two. Okay. Oh I'm seeing a three

Okay Four mm-hmm. I think that's 20 one two three four five six seven eight nine ten eleven twelve thirteen fourteen sixteen seventeen eighteen nineteen twenty Is that how many I got right you got one two You got three right Wow Not psychic not psychic, but not bad Not bad. Maybe if you do the affirmations better than zero. Yeah always better than zero And you know what and you're being positive right now. So your psychic energy is still climb. I can do it again No, you want to do it again? I mean it was exciting radio

No, I mean it was people loved it. I counted other. What were the other psychic boosters? I am peace. I am love I enjoy other website of the things to do. Oh, yes These are some great things to do that can boost up your psychic ability Okay, so whatever the phone rings close your eyes and visualize the person calling and by the way if you do that It's always your mother will miss some calls. Oh, that's that's sweet Gary calling me. Oh wait. Can I try it? Okay, would you like the numbers? Yeah, you want to try the numbers? Yeah I love while you're writing your numbers out. Let me read some more of these tips Yeah, do the tip all right when you stand in line at the bank tell yourself which teller will serve you and it's normally the hot Latin girl

When you watch a sporting event tell yourself the outcome before the event begins This is good for gambling addicts as you develop skill with us if you develop a skill with this exercise Which means you pay attention to sports and you learn what teams are versus what and who's playing for the teams and what their abilities are Top five the exercise helps you develop your intuition precognition Do not misuse this skill for personal gains such as gambling or you'd be likely to lose your skill entirely You're likely to lose all of your money. Have a friend roll a die begin by calling even or odd before the dice is thrown Your accuracy will increase with practice because of you fucking because of odds This is a bad one

Work with a friend and a standard deck of playing cards begin by predicting black or red and then have your friends here Oh, this is all just helping good drinking game. Yeah When you're riding an elevator another passenger joins you tell yourself which button the press The fart button It's always the fart button in the morning write down the names of people you will have important interactions or communications with that day No, I rely on logic Oh fucking dare rely on it today. I'm gonna talk to Michael Jackson He's around

When in line at the movies tell yourself which movie the person or group ahead of you will request If you hear them say it try again another time all those heavy-set black chicks. There's no way they're going to the help Ask three friends a question such as what did you eat for breakfast? Or where do you want to go on your next vacation before you ask their questions? Your friends must decide amongst themselves which one will answer falsely you must write down which friend will answer falsely You're just losing friends. Yeah, absolutely all of your friends are incredibly annoyed by you trying to boost your cycle Definitely This is not I'm not psychic. No, no one is psychic. No one who follows this stuff is right. Okay, Marcus. What do you got?

All right, just spit them out. I've got them all written down here four nine seven three four zero one one four six three nine eight four seven nine one Okay, one one Zero you explain odd, so I still feel like maybe you could be seeing interesting though interesting. We have a

Grand total of two 20 Nope, nope, let's just save the show. Let's save the show. We got to wrap it up here But we do have one more test. This is a picture test. So this is an actual true. This is a true Test that's actually been done to test people for remote viewing right now remote viewings ideas that you can conjure an image in your mind That has been sent from another entity, right? And so that the the image that I have drawn on a piece of paper Right perfect example of an image straight from the center of my brain I've brain I now it's out in the universe. It's just some psychic music before we start of course

He's gonna put some music oh he's gonna do it I was gonna put it in. Oh my god. No, I'm just doing this over the music. Oh, okay Mind and body good, okay Beelzebub I do call upon you to give me the power to smite my enemies and to seed my friends Hail Satan. Hail. Okay. So how do we do this? What order do we do this? I mean, why don't you guess? Marcus is and then I'll try and get and then you also guess Marcus and then that's right We'll all three try to guess each other. Okay Marcus interesting in your picture. I see a picture of

Breasts on a young woman with a A chicken's face. Oh interesting. Okay. I see Cheese goblin a goblin eating cheese. Okay goblin eating cheese It is a coyote with a mustache Interesting I felt we were close We were definitely close and really coyotes eat cheese. All right, let's let's try this again Henry are we gonna go on me now? Do I do you send you thoughts? Okay? So I'm gonna send you what my thought is all right. Look at my eyes. Uh-huh. You got my picture. You got my picture Marcus

Scared you got my picture. Yeah, okay Guess who I All right, I'm going with a Turtle on a trampoline turtle on a trampoline I'm going with baby in the coffin baby in a coffin turtle in a trampoline. You know what's incredibly fucked up What's that? He's got a baby turtle on a trampoline. Let's see what it is It is a baby it is a baby hitler's face on a trampoline

Oh Guys seriously listen, we did not see these beforehand. We seriously did not oh my god, that's so I got chill I'm not a numbers guy Phenomenal phenomenal stuff. All right, okay, so now you guys gonna get what do I got on my picture? Um Sending you my fucking sweet picture thoughts It Is a Try to think of the things you know

Yes, it is a dog Good a dog good. I'm gonna say it's a wet, but wet, but okay It is a cross with tits and testicles This would be your house I wish I want people to see these I can take a picture with my phone after yeah, yeah, yeah, let's put it on the cave comedy radio We can be on their Facebook page. We can definitely do that see what these pictures are here. I love it All right. Well, I guess that's we covered a lot of good psychic talk today and

We'll continue a lot of bad psychic some bad The numbers thing was exciting feel like everyone had a really good time All right guys, we will talk to you soon and let us know if you have psychic abilities or if you have a psychic story Or any sort of story you want to share with us emails at cave comedy radio.com and remember you are our Psychic you got the skills My good solutions my good solutions