Last Podcast On The Left - Episode 491: Blackbeard Part I - Dead Men Tell No Tales, Literally

Episode Date: May 7, 2022

It's History Time! The boys are back and they're plunging headfirst into "the golden age of Piracy" with the story of legendary nautical criminal Edward Teach, better known as Blackbeard.  ...

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Starting point is 00:00:00 There's no place to escape to. This is the last time on the left That's when the cannibalism started I pulled a muscle so now whenever I caught that hurts Get into a car get into a uber First few great hairs yesterday when I yesterday like I had a haircut yesterday And then when I went to like wash my hair today like a bunch fell out did it really a lot cool I fell out like a whole lot you're changing finally into Grant Morrison I'm so welcome today. First of all, I want to say Marcus. I'm glad you're back
Starting point is 00:00:55 Thank you very much. Absolutely. It was honestly. I'm so refreshed Like I came back like I'm so like I feel bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. I'm ready to conquer the fucking world That's great. I kind of felt like that after COVID was like I had so much water and rest my skin looked incredible Isn't that nice? But second of all, this is where I attack you because you use the p-word Okay, the P word now. What would that be the P word? It is I'm not even gonna say you're not gonna say it. Pirate is a slur. You did just say it I said it in the context of contextualizing a slur. So now you're an educator. Yes. Oh, oh because today guess what ladies and gentlemen
Starting point is 00:01:37 Everybody was like Henry you don't get anything ready any fix sure you're gonna get so many fucking facts today. Uh-huh. Yeah, I'm gonna throw up You're gonna leave your family But Pirate Pirate is a slur. Okay the term is see rover If we're gonna correctly Seaman that's that that happened with gay the gay Navy I believe that semen is the actually the correct term here semen is that that would be how they refer to themselves Oh, yeah, other people got a whole bunch of semen on that deck. There's a man. What are you gonna do with them?
Starting point is 00:02:13 There's literally a man named Ben ever who is a modern man Called the sea rovers practice that talks about mostly they also refer to each other as soldier or Oh, yeah, or a thief We're gonna get into this I'm gonna chase you away from me today I refer to them as the human pretzels because in order to be a true semen you've got to suck your own dick Welcome to last podcast on the left everyone. I am Ben hanging out with Henry and hanging out with Marcus parks It's great to have everyone back together again
Starting point is 00:02:45 Good to be back like a bunch of Legos covered in hair Wow the pirate talk By the sea roving community today We are discussing Blackbeard I can't wait to get into this tale of weirdness and madness and overall facial hair Honestly, it's a lot about trade routes. Oh That's good, that's important Now amongst the pirates from the days of yore no name holds quite as much weight as that of blackbeard
Starting point is 00:03:16 Who over the centuries has come to represent the pirate archetype more than any other vagabond of the high seas and they didn't say are also racist That's true now, but they did have a lot of wooden legs an interesting thing about the eye patch You actually put it over the healthy eye Strengthens up the weak one. What that's true. Oh wow that actually didn't know you didn't know that yeah Yeah, yeah, you never went to school with the kid who had to wear an eye patch for a year to fix their lazy eye We called them the unfortunate Well partly this is because blackbeard was one of the most successful and well-known pirates during what historians call the golden age of piracy
Starting point is 00:03:58 Every single pirate like a focus material I watch this week is all Yeah, and of course I would be remiss if I don't mention the greatest era of piracy truly came from Napster, thank you so much for filling the blanks on that one and it has ruined Lars to this day You'll never get over it. No with this period the golden age of piracy lasted from 1697 until 1726 when the last mass hanging of Pirates put an end to what could be called the most romantic period of swashbuckling I actually think it's very offensive that they hung the pirates. I think you drown a pirate Because that's what that's that's the nature that sends them back to their earth No, the problem is that then they're see their ghost belongs to the sea
Starting point is 00:04:50 That's where they want to be then they constantly haunt cruise ships in the future I remember the National Enquirer or wasn't the weekly world news ghost ships were on the cover every week for a year Go ships have really that we will eventually do we will cover some go ships because I do love I do love the concept of goat ships Please it's just about it was the great Resignation but for ships I got him well as far as where piracy was most prevalent during this so-called golden age The vast majority of the activity was concentrated in the colonial America's while the pirates themselves Operated out of strongholds in the Caribbean. Are we gonna go Caribbean or Caribbean here? I don't fucking know. Why don't we go both?
Starting point is 00:05:34 Well, yeah, let's just go. You know whatever suits the sentence whatever goes with the flow man Let's just fuck let's not put any roles on here I feel like we go Caribbean if we're talking about like them having a great time and we go Caribbean if we talk about them being very serious and thinking about murdering people I love that so history. It's Caribbean It's hurricane drink However piracy in the Americas have been happening for centuries prior to this so-called golden age See while one might think that piracy would be a worldwide problem it like many violent activities
Starting point is 00:06:09 Thrived best in unstable environments in the Americas where anything but stable after the Spanish began their Explorations of the New World around the 16th century. It was all for the love of money Single thing about this is about trying to create what they viewed as almost in a way of like rogue Trading is how some of these countries viewed their own weaponization of piracy Which we'll get to the idea of creating privateers doing a kind of shit So there was a whole thing that was set for pirates to come out of it Yes, the time period before all of that. It was all like no, this is just business and of course the pirate tears one of the best
Starting point is 00:06:48 Damn things that ever came out of Disney gave us Justin Timber like give us Britney Spears Christina Aguilera It's strange it's a strange it's a strange bridge for your brain to cross who likes gold more a leprechaun or a pirate But smelling weed I do it does do something to you And I heard the word terpene more than I've ever heard it before in my life And I'm gonna go take a terpene off a fucking bridge As far as the first targets for pirates went the Spanish were mostly concerned with God and gold when they invaded and slaughtered the indigenous populations of South America and all that Aztec, Incan and Mayan gold had to be transported back to Spain somehow
Starting point is 00:07:43 Explorers like Hernan Cortez who brutally subjugated the Aztecs. He melted down much of the Aztec treasure He stole into gold bars then and there for easy transport back to Spain I also saw a lot of people transporting gold dust Not just gold dust is a big thing not just the homoerotic wrestler. Absolutely. Homophobia was his finisher. It was The gold does seem to be the preferred way to transport gold because I guess it could be hidden into anything You could stick it in any sort of like your pot or bag and then put it in your hair Put it in your butt put it anywhere you want as long as we get it back to Spain I think the bouquignet so it actually be very upset if you did put it in your buckled
Starting point is 00:08:25 You would lose a lot of the gold. No, and I would be pissed. Oh, yeah Well, all this gold being transported made Spanish transports easy pickings for the first pirates in America who concentrating on stealing What had just been stolen? Oh, yeah Unfortunately, though, we know very little about these early pirates as actual people because they weren't exactly meticulous Chroniclers of their own histories. No, man. They were free man Oh That's correct. Absolutely salute your shorts get your undies up there have some fun with it I think that they were storytellers and unfortunately when they chose to hang all of them the stories went with them
Starting point is 00:09:05 What else do you do on a boat surrounded by semen and also some friends? You have to tell tales literally dead men tell no tales Indeed, I mean they were storytellers will get to in Blackbeard of all of the pirates Which is why he made it through and he cut through the waves of time He crossed these oceans of time and he arrived here because he understood marketing also Blackbeard great name for a SoundCloud rapper He would have made it in any era a lot of SoundCloud rappers can't even fucking grow a beard But when it came to pirates like Blackbeard who appeared two centuries after the Spanish explorations Well, they weren't the most ardent of archivists their sheer presence and consequence gave us the images and the concepts of pirates as we've known Them since the 18th century
Starting point is 00:09:56 But before we get into Blackbeard himself and just how god-awful and violent the life of an 18th century pirate could be Let's acknowledge our main source for this series today We've got Blackbeard by Angus Constum Which is a highly compelling account of the life and times of Blackbeard the pirate and I also really can't understate How much I've loved this book the sea rovers practice because there really is a lot of details and he writes it in old-timey Waves, that's how you know he's a nerd Angus does yeah No, not Angus this guy Ben Aver the guy Rovers practice where it's just like so loves old-timey shit, but he is modern as hell there is we'll get into it
Starting point is 00:10:32 But there's nothing we now have seen through the various time periods We've wandered through and last podcast on the left the pirate reenactor is a special type of nerd because They fuck and they also be a little tough It's the greatest catch it's tough to be on the sea There is a Blackbeard reenactor that is on every one of these Nat Geo shows and history channel shows and he is just Women in pussy you know Beautiful hair he's dashing He's quite dashing all same and of course if he's a reenactor he doesn't have the actual odor of a pirate
Starting point is 00:11:08 So ladies might enjoy that you might be incorrect on that. Okay. I've been around some in reenactors. Oh Method method people Also Angus check out that film. I believe it's from 93. Wow great It's kind of a funny movie But a big kid named Angus I relate it to that fucking great No, Blackbeard's real I think Green Day was on the soundtrack Yeah, I remember the soundtrack and yeah, there was that yeah, I remember that movie
Starting point is 00:11:41 I remember the soundtrack or remember this is the big kid and the little redheaded kid and you had the buck teeth and everything They got bullied all the time. I remember He committed suicide. Yeah, maybe Now Blackbeard's real name is accepted to be Edward Teach Yeah, no, yeah Edward ditch He was born in the British port of Bristol which back in Blackbeard's day was the premier site of the English side of the African slave trade This made sense because the British have been using Bristol as a hub for selling Irish and English slaves Since the 12th century and it's still very much celebrated there
Starting point is 00:12:18 I don't they don't celebrate it. They just didn't forget about it and they have it. Well, it's a very good place. Yeah, it's quite a Weird they beautiful down though. Yeah, I love Bristol. What is there now? And they're like, can you believe is you got tack house there? And it's like you should be allowed to serve a taco Blackbeard's history is this is again because it's the world of the criminal. They we don't have an exact We don't have exact data on Blackbeard's origins. This has been triangulated to kind of think they believe that he was born in Bristol That it seems to be the common belief amongst many historians that it makes a bunch of sense They there was a whole history as you will see of privateers coming directly from Bristol And a lot of these people have to be trained as a kid to do this shit
Starting point is 00:13:16 But while Blackbeard's port of origin, so to speak, he's indeed it. No, he was really happy with that It's a sea roving joke. I see Well, that is indeed important perhaps Blackbeard's defining characteristic was his appearance He had a long unkempt braided Blackbeard that hung down over his chest Rat-tailed and tied with twists of ribbon and while this sounds like it might make him look sort of goofy It was apparently quite unsettling to see this vagabond with the beard full of twisted ribbons Something so out of the ordinary as to be nightmarish Well, you know, and this is another whether it's legend or it's not he was also apparently very physically large
Starting point is 00:14:07 He was six foot four or five for the time period that was very uncommon How do you even fit underneath in the boats at short sealings? You got to be captain I guess so and so he stood above and he was a cut above the rest of his crew and they would he would cut to very Scary figure indeed captain's log. We've all had one of those before Honestly, I'm happy when I have a captain's log. I hate having a private There's a captain's log walking happens on a train Well Blackbeard dressed in a long sea captain's coat crossed by a sword belt and a bandolier Along with three pistols that he hung from improvised holsters on his chest giving him the appearance of a walking armory
Starting point is 00:14:55 I'm okay Just I just gotta ask really quick because right now this guy sounds super cool But like how much how many like how bad is he before I'm like I love this guy He's a pirate. He will be he will take on the name pirate gladly and so we'll you know Yeah, okay, I mean I It's complicated Yeah, yeah, well to make himself even more menacing during raids Blackbeard would stuff two lengths of fuse under his hat band and light them on fire
Starting point is 00:15:32 To make it appear as if his head itself was smoldering So all while manic eyes stared from behind with an intensity that suggested one was being faced down by the devil himself But of course it was all an act Hmm when it came to piracy the name of the game was intimidation because a pirate's most powerful weapon was not in violence But in the threat of violence and Blackbeard operated mostly on reputation and rumor I actually was really surprised about how much piracy was really based upon strategy versus just showing up and killing everybody I really did always kind of assume you'd get bum-rushed by a pirate ship. It would blow the fuck out of you And they would just get on top of you, but apparently it was this fucking there was a tete-a-tete
Starting point is 00:16:34 It was a game of flags and you'll get into it, but yes flags were used a lot There's a lot of flag Oh my goodness, it's a Cuban missile crisis See piracy itself was more semi organized crime than a constant orgy of violence Something more akin to water-bound street gangs than an Ainz thoughts grouping on the sea. That would be sweet though Yeah, well some pirates however Yeah, I'm with you. I understand where you're from. Yeah, I know what you mean Well some pirates however that we will discuss later on certainly did revel in their fair share of gore and cruel theme
Starting point is 00:17:18 Mostly though a pirate captain like Blackbeard did his level best to ensure that his own crew didn't take casualties Because casualties lowered the morale and the more you could intimidate the less likely one of your guys was gonna get shredded To sticky bloody chunks by a load of grape shot from the other boat What made Blackbeard in particular so successful is that he understood every aspect of piracy Perfectly from appearance to swagger to rule and he knew how to keep his men happy blow job machines Also, I'm a little bit of a pirate myself. I'm wearing old spice You know too is that he did main again with the reason why like it's fun Here in this aspect and maybe one day I'll convince you to do some mafia stories because I am still very compelled
Starting point is 00:18:14 Who did Iceman? Yes, but the main Empathist and the main motive for all of these men was fucking money and they are trying to get that money Which is actually I think very different than a lot of other people that were using them as little chess pieces Everybody else wanted to control Domination Subjugation over these various like indigenous people they wanted to fucking go in and rip Every single piece of valuable thing out of the very mother earth But the pirates were really just there just trying to fucking get theirs and get on out. Oh and absolutely in no way
Starting point is 00:18:45 Anything could go bad if your motivation is money. Oh, no, it's I'm just saying it was just like that's reason why Blackbeard was very smart specifically very smart because his whole thing It's like I'm not trying to get everybody killed. I'm trying to get it's all retired Like this there's one pirate that really is an example that like fucking made a fucking ton of money And then just fucked off and retired to an island and of course that's Tom Brady Well, it's almost certain that Blackbeard never killed anyone until his final bloody battle Which is fucking awesome, and I can't wait to get the Blackbeard's last stand Nice, but from what we've seen again and again and all of the episodes that we've done that more focused on
Starting point is 00:19:29 Criminality than killing it's usually the bodies that bring the authorities to your door the fastest and Blackbeard understood Less bodies less problems. I think that he my personal opinion is that he moved Towards killing less and he probably killed a lot more as a young man I think when he was coming through because you have to cut you have to prove to yourself That's the one thing about a pirate ship is that you the same thing it is a democracy will get into it But you you have to show them that you're willing to do capital punishment if you are going to stay in charge Oh, yeah, no because that's it. We'll get into that later, but like the most dangerous person to a pirate was other pirates That's where the real violence came in. Yeah, why wouldn't you think with walking the plank anyone ever did a fun dive?
Starting point is 00:20:17 That's a myth to no one walk the plank what caught you in another fucking no They just threw him over the side, why would they have a plank when you can just toss someone over the side I don't fucking know maybe because it's fucking cool and I know they did other torture methods Oh, yeah, so but he didn't understand it. Nobody no crime much like Carol Baskin But as far as the origins of the Golden Age of Piracy go and as far as other pirates besides Blackbeard went those indeed our story steeped in violence death and warfare and Many a seaman did indeed meet a bloody end at the tip of a pirate's cutlass Now while there have been pirates of a kind in the Americas since the 1500s
Starting point is 00:21:08 The pirates that ruled the Golden Age of Piracy Largely began as legally sanctioned mercenaries of a sort called Privateers who caused all sorts of chaos on the high seas during the European conflicts of the late 17th century So it was a job private is too cute of a name for what they do See during wartime ship owners or captains could go to their governments and obtain a letter of moh That said they could legally attack plunder and kill the crews of enemies of the state on the high seas Without oversight or limit Doing man, you're killing my entire crew as you'll see right here. I have this piece of paper
Starting point is 00:21:54 When you do a lot of times it's a reason why you build a navy It's really important if you're going to do a domination game You have to use the Navy to slowly weaken coastal cities that you can get and also seep their various ships for supplies for yourself So you're comparing you doing with your little finger? It's like a true monarch I don't I sit afar and I make decisions I oversee There's a lot of lessons from Civ that can really be applied here It's like Walter talking about Vietnam These privateers however, we're not military men attacking other military men like the hated
Starting point is 00:22:38 Hessian mercenaries who fought for the British during the American Revolutionary War Instead many but not all privateers were merchants attacking other merchants Meaning that it wasn't much different from two shopkeepers who paid protection to two different street gangs Battling it out all on their own. They are the magic of two shopkeepers belong to different mafias Yeah, and the mafias fought over their shit because that was you well You remember the big sandwich wars of 1992 that took place in Brooklyn, you know, I mean you can it's not true You can imagine truly this happens all the time these merchants. They're very aggressive. Yeah Yeah, indeed that sandwich shop that the mafia run over on
Starting point is 00:23:25 Graham Avenue like they had the best godfather sandwich in the entire fucking universe There's some to it all the next killer always gave you food poisoning, but we still went always Hey, what's up everyone, how you doing Ben kissle here with Henry Zabrowski Yeah, bro Henry Zabrowski is smoking some of that sweet last podcast Go out there and purchase yourself some I hope you enjoy it We have sativa we have indica and we have a hybrid and I have to tell you for my personal experience They are wonderful super tasty live resin. You really get the delicious weedy taste, which is what I like and three different experiences You go to your local vape store and get it absolutely. Thank y'all so much for supporting the show
Starting point is 00:24:11 We absolutely love you can't wait to see on the road and get that vape Put it in your brain and have a good time and if you want to set your favorite weed store Give them a call and ask for them by name last podcast on the left. It's weed. Hail yourselves everyone. Hail Satan One of the most infamous of privateers was a Scotsman named captain kid Whose own government turned on him in 1701 despite the fact that kid had successfully rated a number of French vessels under a British letter of milk It's really kind of it's a pain in the ass because they do the thing kind of what we did with some of our Private war industries during the Afghanistan war sure that you basically pay a bunch of people to go do a bunch of dirty work
Starting point is 00:24:59 For you and say it's legal and then you expect them all to stop Now it's not legal anymore and now all you've been pirates for ten years I grow up legal pirates, but now Mmm. Yeah, it's hard to go back. I put that genie back in the bottom being a mercenary sounds like it could be really fun until it's not Well through a series of sea related Misunderstandings kid was it's a very complicated how kid got to be declared a pirate by the English government a lot of sea Really again. Yeah, a lot of sea related misunderstandings. It's like a slur You can't call a pirate a pirate during this time period because you get shot in the head It's like calling a guy that works for the mafia like say like you're a mob guy, right?
Starting point is 00:25:39 Like if you just Where it's the same thing where you're supposed to call them again a warrior soldier, maybe it's the equivalent of being called a goomba After being arrested in Boston captain kid was sent to England and falsely charged with murder And was thereafter sentenced to death by hanging on the first attempt the hangman's rope broke and kid survived Causing some in the crowd to call for kids release because the breaking of a hangman's rope was sometimes seen as a sign from God That the condemned should live yeah It's all the sense in the world and also didn't they do a thing where if you live during the hanging you were free to go Sometimes everybody died. Yeah, I mean, that's why they did eventually change it to hang by the neck and tell you are dead
Starting point is 00:26:28 But in this case God made no exceptions for pirates No Ten minutes later Captain kid was hanged again this time successfully and his corpse was dobbed with tar to preserve it for the display to come For the next three years Captain kid's body was hung in a jibbit cage for public display over the River Thames as a warning to other pirates as to what their eventual fate might be if they continued their treachery on the high seas and they all looked at it. They said we're going back to be in Weird yeah, great
Starting point is 00:27:16 But if a privateer stayed in the good graces of his government then life consisted of capturing enemy ships Bringing them to port and turning them over to the government for a quarter of the total value of the ship and cargo Oh, yeah, man a good deal. You basically get 20 to 25 percent. It's basically an entertainment manager Yeah, you go and you drop off their their chunk of loot and they don't care as matter of fact They knighted one of those dudes was Henry Morgan. I believe was knighted for his privateer service And they made him the governor of Jamaica after he went and stole all of his buddy's loot He brought it all back to fucking to England He brought it all back to Europe and then he didn't give anybody their cut and he was like, okay
Starting point is 00:27:56 Oh that that can't drink Captain Morgan ever again. No, I think Captain Morgan something else I don't know if it's Henry Morgan. I think it's another Morgan. Yeah, Captain Morgan's too spicy. Yeah Yeah, I don't like spice from no, I don't need it Privateering reached his peak in the early 18th century during the war of Spanish succession Everyone, please put on your high school history hats. You fucking history Yes, and of course the war of Spanish succession Who's when England and Holland tried preventing France from taking control of the Spanish Empire after the Spanish Monarch died without an air Hey, buddy. Hey, Jared. Why don't you stand up in class and crop dust everybody, bro. I'm gonna go to the bathroom
Starting point is 00:28:53 I love history class But when that war ended in 1713 You suddenly had thousands of men who had spent over a decade violently attacking other sea vessels for plunder and capture so the seas were filled with men whose only Scales were sailing and fighting in other words pirates Oh my goodness, I watched a really good history channel documentary called true Caribbean pirates that was like it's good but they They talk about how because the goal was that the Spain was given all of our side of the world by the Pope
Starting point is 00:29:35 Right like what basically they went on a map the pope just people just writing this shit down and people are following That is what happened They just gave them what they called the Spanish main which is like, you know Mexico all of the islands all the different Caribbean islands and then you got like the side the around the coasts of South America and they were just given that and so eventually England and Holland and France were like we want some of this fucking action too So what they would do is they would send dudes over because again, they were stretched so thin sieve If you don't right
Starting point is 00:30:06 Shit around if you don't move your units around enough You will leave whole other ends of your ass fucking open for anybody come stick a finger up there, right? Sure The thing was all of these islands were poorly guarded because you can't bring a whole fucking Spanish or modern to come watch the entire Spanish main yeah, so these guys and you're also involved in all the wars back in Europe And in addition to all of these conflicts that are happening like all of these expansion conflicts You've also just got the cotton your constant warfare in Europe that happens for hundreds of years hundreds of years So you're stretched super thin so they're sending privateers over to slowly leech on the business going here and slowly
Starting point is 00:30:41 Dotting little holds throughout the Caribbean and one of those was like but that's where the bouquignets come from the actual entomology of the word buccaneers comes from the buccane, which is the no you're all learning this Which is the sticks they used to dry pork meat on I'm technically boucan buccaneer buccaneer now buccaneer meant jerky maker Yeah, I'll fucking kill all of you Same time. I'll strap a bunch of C4 to my head my fucking head And I'll kill everyone with information get you in trouble if you do that in school But that's where they started they left them behind and then they all thought like okay
Starting point is 00:31:18 You guys are all gonna come back now that you guys been doing your buccaneering all this time period and then they didn't they did not okay Now as far as the life of an 18th century sailor went it was an absolutely Awful way to live quite possibly one of the worst jobs to have and a time when life was already a brutal struggle for anyone Who wasn't nobility? sailors mostly ate heavily salted meats slept in crowded leaky cabins and only wore a damp rotting smelly clothes Like Officers and ship owners shortchanged and cheated sailors at every turn and when sailors went ashore
Starting point is 00:31:58 They were constantly duped by sex workers and tavern owners who knew that sailors weren't the brightest bulbs when it came to land living Why why they do with the sailors like this? I mean, I know fleet week in New York City. They get treated very well Don't have sex with your wife right in front of you those fleet boys know what they're doing. Yes, they do Additionally, most sailors were looked down upon as filthy seerats by most respectable folk Yeah, you're hurting my feelings You're not a woman. I can't be But from what it seems the most dangerous person in a sailors life by far was their own captain Captains could literally get away with murder if he felt that brutality was necessary to keep control over his men and
Starting point is 00:33:02 Sometimes that captain might just be a sadistic prick looking for a way to pass the time during passage And this is a legal boats. This is not a pirate boat. This is not Just you are a sailor for the fucking in the various navies one of these are my yeah Okay, you just got a sailor with a mark. You just got a job as a sailor on a merchant ship that takes molasses from Jet from Kingston to Bristol and that's Diabetes Money then you get the women. I think that's Simpsons, right? Yeah, the Simpsons. Yeah Yeah, first you get to show my beautiful beautiful sugar
Starting point is 00:33:41 In one example a captain named Haskins went below decks one night looking for a crew member who was late going on watch He found the man sleeping so captain Haskins punched him in the face and Bludgeoned his head with a foot-long metal cone called a Marlin spike to wake him up might hurt his Observational abilities. Maybe I would just tickle his feet a little bit. Yeah, I'd just be like, it's time for you to get up Gotta get up. Yeah, the crewman was then sent in the freezing rain to work the top mast and began Convulsing due to blood loss when other sailors went to help him Captain Haskins said he'd shoot the first man who gave assistance and the sailor died up there for the great offense of Showing up late to work. And this is the thing too. He's also not doing his job because he's dead
Starting point is 00:34:33 You know what I mean? Like there's no reason to beat the man half to death and then put him at his job because then he can't do his job Well, I think the next man up. Oh, yeah, there's an immediate another sailor that's gonna go there Yeah, yeah, and I imagine he'd be scared about being late. You want to be on time. Yeah, there should be a 15 minute grace Well, maybe he maybe he maybe he maybe there was some grace and he even overslept that. Hmm. Yeah, maybe Time then, you know, maybe we'll talk. Well, you know, we'll talk about it. You're bludgeoned damn near to death The sailors would routinely be whipped to death for the smallest of errors or Tortured at the whims of the captain and as it ever was
Starting point is 00:35:14 Authorities routinely sided with the captain and the ship owners over the crew Because a merchant captain was said to have the same power over his sailors as a parent had over a child I'm your father now Oh, you can see you're going out there dressed like that with those running smelly clothes on. Yeah That's how you should be I'm gonna pull you cross my knee. Oh, you know what? You're too gross to speak And so it wasn't all that surprising that mutiny was not the most uncommon of occurrences And when it came to pirates if they weren't former privateers
Starting point is 00:35:51 They were mutineers who'd risen up and murdered an unfit or cruel captain. They I saw one historian It might have been Beverin and might have been the other dude dressed up as Blackbeard But they did say that one of the only true examples of actual democracy that existed Yeah on the face of the planet during this time period was on various ships, especially pirate ships, dude I love the mutineers. They got web feet. They could swim under water No, that's you're now you're talking about another weird mouseketeer derivative Remember battle toes Imagineers podcast in ears. Oh, I don't know either way. I want to be a battle towed
Starting point is 00:36:37 God willing one day you will be I really hope you can transition to battle tow I can't wait my pronouns are ribbit ribbit. Come on Well in an example of a typical 18th century mutiny a crew disloyal to the captain snuck into quarters when everyone else was asleep and Cut the throats of those who they felt would stand with the captain when push came to shove You know, but the captain in this particular mutiny didn't take the revolution laying down. I'm doing it sitting down When the mutineers tried throwing the captain overboard Instead not making him walk the fucking plank just throwing him overboard
Starting point is 00:37:20 The captain slipped out of their grasp and slashed the throat of one of his assailants with a knife I dare you to pull me and get a salty pre-chater. We said three two one and it was on go But even so the mutineers were too many and one of the leaders a man named Gao Simply shot the captain with a flintlock pistol. It's like any end Jones. It's literally him. Just go like ah I'll get y'all then it's like to shoot some in the head. Yeah Maybe Done, maybe our head diarrhea as well like Harrison Ford did in that scene, which is why they had to Improv the gunshot
Starting point is 00:38:05 Learning that is true. That is true. He had diarrhea that day It was not a big fight wasn't no Well, once it was all over all hands were called on deck and gal was voted captain Whoo reportedly he told his men quote if you're after I see any of you whispering together You shall be served in the same manner as those that are gone before Sounds like you're kind of being like the captain that we just killed. I know I just sound like but I Just say we have to have stability We're in a place here. We don't know really to change. We don't need to change drastically
Starting point is 00:38:43 After a mutiny was over and done with the mutineers could do one of two things The more law abiding option would be to sail back to the port Abandon ship and try to insert themselves back into maritime society in a gainful employment position Yeah, right This was the riskier option because it tended to look suspicious when a bunch of dudes Suddenly showed up in a port all at once shrugging their shoulders as to how they ended up in Jamaica without a ship or a captain Covered in pirate gear like They're very very obviously pirates we're not
Starting point is 00:39:24 No, we're not mutineers now. I've never killed a man in cold blood But even though this was the riskier option it's estimated that half of all mutineers chose to start again While the other half kept the ship and turned to piracy We're talking all the music that you can listen to for free on demand I saw the new Guardians of the Galaxy Christmas special early Most far as who those pirates were most were men in their 20s rough and tumble vagabonds With missing fingers from various rope-related sailing incidents and even fewer teeth from poor nutrition But regardless the majority were still in fact fit and experienced semen and perhaps surprisingly
Starting point is 00:40:19 These pirates weren't all European Oh on Blackbeard ship particularly half of the crew were African Former enslaved people who had been rescued on the transatlantic slave passage from Africa to the Americas rescued With the quotation marks with the quotation marks. Yes This crew included Blackbeard's fearless lieutenant a former high-ranking African chieftain named Black Caesar Who will learn more about next episode nice? But lest we think that these pirates were saving Africans from a life of enslavement out of principle It was really all about practicality. We ain't got no class. We ain't got no principle
Starting point is 00:41:00 That's a great Alice Cooper reference. Yes, very much in the future from now. Yes Yeah, that's actually very true First of all captured slave ships made great pirate ships because they were fast and had plenty of room for crew and plunder Second put coldly if pirates could sell enslaved people at slave auctions They did but when it came to most pirates They didn't have quite the necessary air to show up at slave selling hubs like Charleston, South Carolina and Convinced local authorities that they were indeed quote-unquote legitimate slavers
Starting point is 00:41:43 Some however dead and that being said most pirates recognized that many of the enslaved men on these ships Were prisoners of war who had been sold to slavers by enemy tribes Therefore, they were fierce fucking warriors. Oh, yeah So many an African joined pirate crews to plunder other slave ships for the trade goods that came as a result of Slaving and by most estimates 30% of active pirates were black by the early 18th century Interesting, but I also believe we were talking about this a little bit when we did our call like the idea that This this group of people do they come from a need to be free like the pirates want to be free
Starting point is 00:42:27 The ideas did not belong to any kingdom to only be amongst yourself like be able to like be your own man Be your own ruler do that kind of like a 1963 truck driver Yep But you know sometimes the problem is as we see is that they do end up turning into criminal organizations Which means that nobody and in the end the only people that are getting served with the people at the top tap and It's time and time again captain rips up rip off the entire crew It's it's just it's a part of being a pirate, but it's also a way there You see these stories within all of these tales of piracy of people that get their nut and get out
Starting point is 00:43:03 They get to fuck off and say fuck all of you get to go retire I get to retire they get to go be free men someplace on an island where you're the only person there and like you know You bring whatever a little lonely though Not by then I mean you've been on a boat for a hunt you've been in a boat for years with hundreds of dudes And sometimes women you want to be alone for a second All right Yeah I mean for me like a lot of pirates seem like the the sort of freedom that they're looking for it's kind of the same sort of
Starting point is 00:43:31 Freedom that you saw and like Gold Rush American frontiersmen where like they're going out and then they're living these solitary lives And they're just saying I'm I'm out here in the mountains to make enough money for whiskey and whores And then I go out tomorrow, and I do it again And that's kind of attainable gold Yeah, and that's the thing about pirates is like going out getting enough plunder taking it back to some to fucking Important Jamaica go to the tavern go to the brothel and then go out and do it again And that's your fucking life, and that's a life for a pirate Life for comedians
Starting point is 00:44:04 A lot of people I think there's a lot of fun to be had there, but I but then there's a lot of downtime There's a lot of miserable stuff that happens. Oh, yeah, there's a lot in there Yeah, but then the going but the that the going to the bar and getting drunk after a hard months of fun part that sounds fun Yeah, yeah, that's that's the fun part. Yes. Yeah, the gold rush getting the golds fun getting there sucks What's all the turn the panning sounds? We should do a whole gold rush series. Yeah, let's get on it Why don't you just get on the gold rush series? We already avoided the shovel Sorry like we could start get we can really get into like the nitty-gritty as far as like what sort of fucking gold panning Which is actually it goes by faster than you'll think it's a kid because you think you're never gonna go back to school
Starting point is 00:45:01 But you do relatively quickly especially with the one of days if you're in football, but anyway, what kind of shovels did a pirate use Marcus? Pirates didn't use shovels as well. They didn't really work on them. I mean they might have more of a bucket in the sand I'm really very tired. I'm very tired. I'm tired of this They found the shovels that were there already. Okay. Yeah, yeah, but concerning those African pirates Africans never appeared on official records as pirates when pirate crews were captured nor were they mentioned in Contemporary accounts of piracy rather they were always listed as runaway slaves And it's said that those who watch their shipmates swing from the gallows from the auction block Envy the dead or I'm a classic American character called captain whitewash
Starting point is 00:45:45 Now as far as how authority worked on a pirate ship it was as Henry said Surprisingly democratic and race didn't matter on most ships when it came time to make decisions In fact, nothing mattered when it came time to make decisions on a pirate ship All that mattered was that you were a crew member every man had a say in every decision outside of active battle and Meetings were held as to the division of food and drink the election of officers and what to do with prisoners Yes, and they and the captain would lead these votes because he wanted everybody to do it And then they're also they could also decide like a group of us want to go and raid this coastal town We're gonna go do that. Hmm. You guys gonna hang out on the ship
Starting point is 00:46:39 It's like doing a group vacation with a bunch of friends. Yeah, we'll be like well, we're gonna go play tennis Dabra needs a Norepa Yeah Fine one have some FOMO though. I think you're gonna want to go have some fun with the raid and stuff Well in a sense this democracy on the high seas was a utopia for a common sailor who truly preferred this life They were unencumbered by the whims and moods of a ship's captain or a ship owner who constantly looked at their men as disposable or Replaceable the only time that pirates followed the orders of the pirate captain Unquestioningly was during battle because the pirate captain had been elected specifically for that purpose
Starting point is 00:47:20 Just like you'd elect the guy who made the best stew as the ships cook. I put less shit in this one There were no special privileges for the captain either He shared the same food and lodgings as everyone else But there was no denying that being the captain of a pirate ship fed the ego Which when it came to pirates like Blackbeard was kind of the whole point. Oh, yeah, it's about being captain You also were the person in charge of divvying up the loot So you did have the access to all of the loot first. Oh, they play a little one for me one For me one
Starting point is 00:47:58 Pretty much all a captain had to do to keep his post was to bring his crew's success and plunder without too many Casualties on their own side and just so long as that was the case as it was with Blackbeard for many years Their position was guaranteed Now under the captain was the quartermaster who kept the peace on board and settled drunken disputes in addition to selecting men to lead the attacks planned by the captain and the quartermaster also led those boarding parties when the attacks came This highly dangerous job of leading the charge was actually turned into a privilege because the first pirate who boarded a captured vessel Had first pick of whatever loot was on board. You got to make it Enjoyable you gotta give up
Starting point is 00:48:44 Want to have the job. It's very difficult tonight. This is honestly the Amazon should learn something. Yes indeed Of course unfortunate that the union busted because it sounds like this pirate ship had more of a democracy Than our current Economic situation who's the pirates these days? Like the captain quartermaster was another elected position and even came with the possibility of promotion If a pirate ship captured another vessel worthy of keeping and if they had enough men to crew it Then the quartermaster could be given a ship of his own Suddenly you have a pirate fleet. You got a pirate fleet dude. You got two people
Starting point is 00:49:33 Franchising two groups they can go and attack people it seems like this is much easier to flank a boat if you got two boats Sure, you can show up and pull up to either side and be like we've got gender rates cool and Continuing in the theme of democracy an 11-point pirate bill of rights Actually existed that was pretty much agreed upon across pirate them This bill of rights set out the rules of conduct and the punishments that came as a result of breaking those rules While the men were at sea an amendment number seven Terry once again if you smelt it you dealt it The clouds of other men
Starting point is 00:50:13 First every man had a vote in what they called affairs of the moment yes, and all men had equal title to fresh provisions and strong liquors to use at leisure unless those provisions and liquors became scarce Which is why we are drawing a line on the rom to see where it is at the end of every night Oh, some of you boys are getting spent. Oh, your sea father. Oh my goodness Well, you could always do what I used to do fake it. You don't put a little bit of water in there I think about you're on a ship. Yeah, but water exactly Well as far as loot went it was to be divided equally amongst the men
Starting point is 00:50:56 But if anyone dared to fraud or cheat the gang they were to be marooned as punishment Which was slightly better than simply being thrown overboard due to the slight chance of rescue I don't know. I've heard I was reading a little bit They said the idea of being marooned is one of the worst things that can fucking happen to you because a lot of those places There is nobody around for hundreds of miles and we just starved to death on an island now Well, it's actually you die of thirst first You die of thirst long before you starve to death. Yeah Well, the chance of rescue was but that's a thing there was a slight chance to rescue sure
Starting point is 00:51:33 Most of the time maroon pirates were left on actual desert islands. It's nothing more. It's just sand It's just sandbars at low tide and they were left with food a small amount of water and a pistol If he chose to take his own life rather than die of thirst. Here you go. Here's a bit of a dessert That's a gun there Now while one might think that a pirate ship was almost constant chaos The pirate bill of rights did its best to discourage on ship conflict No games of dice or cards were allowed All pistols and swords had to be clean and fit for service at all times and it was lights out at 8 o'clock
Starting point is 00:52:15 Everybody because we are doing bedtime stories at 745 That is it. You know, I only tell one story. Hey, so don't you be asking for more? Oh, tell me more about Captain Diabetes Captain Diabetes comes in the night and steals your feet Because of your addicted to that sweet number one trade source of the time period. Oh, I love this story But if a man quote-unquote Still remained inclined for drinking and that by the way is directly from the pirate bill of rights if you're still inclined for drinking You could do so on the open deck in the dark As far as women went if a man snuck a woman aboard and carried her out to sea secretly
Starting point is 00:53:06 Both of them would be executed on the spot if the woman was discovered I just have to say this is much less romantic than I thought it was gonna be Yeah, I never sold you. I said that being a pirate was romantic. Oh, I never said fucking Okay, so we're both gonna die Think about that ladies Imagine that you go to meet your new bow, right? And he takes you on the houseboat and he's like, oh, we've got to be quiet And then all of a sudden they go out there because they did have to paddle a little what they called the man I think it was called the war boat or man at war boat, which is the little canoe
Starting point is 00:53:45 They would send out to go look to see like check the coast like if they were gonna do a raid or whatever They would send out these little canoes and so you'd have to go out there on this canoe Well, he's like, yeah, be quiet. No, I got a romantic. I'm gonna shut up. Yeah, you are It's a little Shakespeare in love ish Just the gal up a little bit more like a fella get around board there That's the that's a thing people know people did try to do that. They would try to dress up the ladies as Men and then they would be discovered and murdered Pretty often because also
Starting point is 00:54:24 They viewed gay sex on a pirate ship was frowned upon And there is a little bit of an example should I run roll into my little bit of an Democracy see you're over democracy. I know you've been focused on this for quite a while doing a lot of extensive research But there was a story of the pirate by the name of sharp who his whole crew mute need because he had promised at the very beginning It was like hey, listen like we're all gonna get a thousand pieces of gold a piece. That's a lot of gold It is and when then when then we're done. We're out one big score One final score and I'm in tool for this shit They did it right they got this thing and then in their celebrations the captain held a dice game
Starting point is 00:55:09 Which is again, it breaks the cold Against the pirate bill of rights. It's not good idea. They're too busy drinking getting into it, right? There's like all ready to do this and turns out the captain was a bit lucky because he won I'm the majority of the people's shares, right? And he won all this money and in the middle of the night. They're like, I think we need to take our money back That's why this is in the bill of rights. This is to protect the captain as much as anyone else So they voted to say like hey, alright, we're done. We're muting against you You're not the captain anymore. You're putting the stocks, right?
Starting point is 00:55:40 But then begins Politicking all night to try to figure well, who's gonna take his place the guy who stood up next was a person by the name of William Cook Who was serving to captain Edmund Cook, right? Which is a very big forward crater. He was the first one to say like alright I'm gonna be captain now. You guys are all ready to be a part like alright. This is it We're gonna get you on my side. You want to be captain? I want to be captain. Did you see what we just did to the other captain? I know but I feel like this time you might like me a little better. All right, all right free ice cream He say he was gonna do this, but then a paper with a bunch of names written on it was submitted around to the rest of the crew that basically
Starting point is 00:56:14 Said it that this William Cook was He was made in accusations were made against him for being buggered by his former captain, right? That he was the captain's dick boy. Oh So they did like a gay whisper campaign against them like Carl Road did to Anne Richards Yes, it's the fucking Anne Richards is at Carl Road. It's a whole fucking bullshit. Oh, yeah They came out of but then William Cook when was faced with these charges. He's like, yes, I did fuck captain cook Actually took it all he's like I say, oh, I know all of you suck dick So they but then guess what they put him in fucking stocks for being a son of mine so all of us and now he's fucking arrested
Starting point is 00:56:59 Oh, they all suck dick at sea, but you can't ever admit it with her stocks on the ship. Oh, yes So eventually they got a new guy there with a they voted up a new person In the very end throughout all of that But it just shows that like they went through all of these processes and the last dude was like, okay All right, I'm gonna be now you go you're gonna vote for me We're gonna get it so now what we have to do is sensibly move forward Yeah, but you know, and that was that was captain Tom Cruz and of course he was later expelled for being a fish fucker It is yes
Starting point is 00:57:37 A roast as dark as the night Perfect for fueling the cryptid research and mad ravings required for your podcasting. Don't mind the red eyes He's just trying to warn you of the bridge The bridge finally from the caffeine-addled brains of Spring Hill Jack coffee and last podcast on the left We bring you Mothman's red-eye blend. Yes delicious Panama beans go to last podcast merch calm to order yours today Well concerning disagreements no man was allowed to strike another according to the Pirate Bill of Rights And if there was ever a quote-unquote man's quarrel to be had Pirate ship had to be docked and they had to find a piece of land for a duel with pistol and sword
Starting point is 00:58:29 You're wearing my hat Greg. No, this is my hat. That's my hat Let's go to shore. We have a duel Yeah, let's do a bit of a duel. Okay, let me stretch. Oh, I should have stretched once in my entire life before First the men caught in the quarrel would engage in a pistol duel at ten paces But if both men missed the shot They'd both be given cutleresses and the man who drew first blood would be declared the victor and the winner of the argument Her question is let me ask you this Marcus. Do you know when they shoot? How accurate are pistols? How often do you think that they miss each other? I'm not saying if you know, I don't know side stories
Starting point is 00:59:11 Lpo TL a gmail.com if you know anything about how these are like old their old like single-shot flintlock pistols with you know like those fucking musket balls I Would imagine not super accurate, but if they do hit you you don't die most of it from what I remember Infection you die from the infection because it shatters like it just fucking shatters bone But even if you were like yeah, and then one like hits the other guy's hand. He's like, oh Like he did it. All right. I guess it's Greg's hat, you know. Yeah. Yeah, it's just a little bit of blood. Yeah. Yeah Well, perhaps the most interesting rule and honestly, maybe the smartest one was that no pirate was allowed to talk shit about Pirate life until his share reached 1,000 pounds, which was quite the tidy sum of money in those days
Starting point is 01:00:01 Oh, yes pirates even had a kind of workman's comp Stating that if a man lost a limb during service or became cripple as they put it He was given eight hundred dollars out of the public stock and proportional payment for quote lesser hurts They had a counting on pirate ships They literally would go through because they'd have to be like well, this is the company money, right? And this is our payout. This is what everybody gets paid up But this is what we need for musket bullets cannon fire food Mostly again what you'll find out it is most what the original pirates and the bouquets and they fit it
Starting point is 01:00:37 But yes, they stole goods quite on like, you know sugar food all that kind of stuff just to keep going and then they would sell it Finally and this is in the bill of rights. It was decreed that if a pirate ship had a musician on board The musician was allowed to rest his instrument on Sunday But requests were fair game for any other day of the week. Nice. What a fun thing time has a fun time for a musician It's like being uh, it's like being the impractical jokers on one of their cruises Are you doing a bit? Um, I do you think that at any point like there there must have been a scenario We're a pirate's like a play that play that the girl who left shot a C and you know, it's probably guys like I don't know
Starting point is 01:01:23 You better you better know it. I don't know it's like well, why don't we make it sound like it or somebody's gonna get the sword? You better have a large catalog of cards were technically back in the day They were viewed as a separate class so they were not allowed to be killed like it was interesting about Pirate ships at this time is that you know earlier talked about like 30% of pirates were black the old-timey sea shanties That we know like blow the man down You know like what you do with a runken sailor? Yeah, everybody got obsessed with during quarantine Yeah, those those were a co-written by the sailors of the European sailors and the black sailors who introduced The idea of using rhythm like singing rhythm songs while they did work to while away the menial hours
Starting point is 01:02:08 Well, when we come together, can't we create great things? Yeah, you tame it you fucking Speaking of which before the age of black beard piracy was heavily wrapped in the historical events of the time and Pirates preyed on the various economic powerhouses that were dependent on sea trade namely slavery interestingly piracy was actually a huge deterrent to the rise of slavery in the new world because there were so many pirates Targeting slave ships and the decline of piracy after the golden age Directly correlates with the rise of slavery in the Americas See as you may remember from history class depending on what part of America you learned your history the transatlantic slave trade operated on a triangular route
Starting point is 01:02:56 Goods would be traded to African tribes for other enslaved tribesmen captured in wars or raids And slave people would then be sold in the Americas for currency and currency would be used to buy more goods to trade for more people This meant that there were tens of thousands of ships Constantly crisscrossing the Atlantic loaded with weapons gold food and other goods and of course Also containing possible new shipmates in the aforementioned rescued slaves I kind of feel like it must be obviously. I mean, I don't care about these people but it is that idea of like it must be very Eerie to be on open water and then all of a sudden you see this other thing like this other ship like
Starting point is 01:03:42 Rolling up on you like you sit there and you kind of a lot of these guys were sitting. They were heavily armed Yeah by the time like there was one documentary that I saw. I'm not talking about like porn. I'm talking about an actual documentary Oh, wow that I saw that basically said it's Yeah, you would time it too because they know what they've done certain legs of the triangle. They're coming back sick Yeah, they're coming back low supplies low like cuz the common factor in all of these various trade routes Was that you have to build in knowing you have to stack it with people knowing that by the time you got to various destinations? 50% of your crew would have dysentery 50% like they would be sick fucked up low supplies
Starting point is 01:04:23 And that you're very vulnerable in those moments. Well, I mean you got to take that Duke You got to use it as a weapon we learn. Yeah, and it wasn't when these pirates would rave slave ships It wasn't just the enslaved people that were a jump in ship. It was also the dudes who just worked On the slave ships because it was known as what working a slave ship was known as the worst possible job you could have on-sea So they were very ready Yeah, they were the worst So maybe the worst possible job that's ever exist. Yeah, oh, yeah, absolutely
Starting point is 01:04:55 Mm-hmm around this time The English also developed the harshest of the navigation acts which strictly regulated trade Pirates on the other hand operated outside of these regulations and sold goods at below market value Which factored heavily in the piracy boom of the late 1600s. Yeah, man bootleg and Prada bags Absolutely Now piracy did fall a bit during the aforementioned war of Spanish succession Because pirates could become legal privateers and they had no problem whatsoever selling the goods they plundered But when the war was over
Starting point is 01:05:32 Merchant sailor pay was slashed by half which led to thousands of impoverished sailors turning to piracy I love that. They didn't even think that that would be a thing. They didn't even think they like Oh, yeah, no, they'll be so excited to come back make less money not have a job and then and now what they're doing is illegal They're gonna love it. Yeah, but since the pirates were preying on the transatlantic slavers It only made sense that the base of operations for many pirates was where the slavers picked up the goods that were traded to the African tribes That was of course the Caribbean. That's for Caribbean is supposed to be for when it's partying So this is the Caribbean. You know what? No, man. I'm going with Caribbean Because you know, it was you know a fucking party in place the Republic of Pirates, which actually existed
Starting point is 01:06:18 That's a party place piracy become such a business in and of itself that by the early 18th century They established an actual Republic of Pirates in Jamaica Man, isn't that kind of it's kind of crazy because we talked about when we did We just did Ma Barker like the idea of like whole town Just becoming criminally. It's such a part of American history Straight up like a criminal town apparently we're supposed to go to a place here in California called pioneer town. Oh, yeah It is cool. Yeah, that's what they say Included amongst the group of pirates who founded this Republic was Charles vane one of the most
Starting point is 01:06:59 Unnecessarily cruel pirates of the day and it was a particularly brutal campaign of piracy on veins part that was partly Responsible for the founding of the Republic of Pirates I'm trying to think of the name of the woman who's saying you're so vain, but I can't You know the one that got into my head was you know, call me. Mr. Bed. Call me About Dennis Raider was insane. No, I think that one's about a guy at a pizza place On April 4th 1718 Captain vane raised the black flag of piracy to the mast head of his ship the lock and Embarked on a four-week rampage around the Bahamas
Starting point is 01:07:48 You know what they would do because again system of flex They would arrive because if you wanted to show it like sometimes you'd put up depending on what you're looking at right You do put up whatever country's flag. They would make their own versions of many countries flags So that you think it belonged to you or you think it's a it's a friendly ship. Yeah, we're gonna want to attack that ship out of Monday It's got a flag of girth It is kind of crazy though because it is just so British still because they still have to tell you they're attacking you Like all right, what if the pirate flag now 27 minutes, we will be aggressively fighting you
Starting point is 01:08:30 And they would fly a red flag that says they're prepared to fight Yeah, do that type of thing and then you have to what you watch Ship so when the red they're prepping up, but if you see the black flag gets on you like oh, they're coming I got it. Okay Captain vane captured a dozen ships that month and while most pirates spared the crews They captured because there usually wasn't an angle and torturing or killing them vane reveled in the opportunity After seizing a ship called the William and Mary vane beat the whole crew for information on treasure Then seized one of the sailors and lashed him to the long slat of wood that jutted from the front of the ship called the bow
Starting point is 01:09:07 Sprit and the whole time when he was going You like to do much When that didn't work vane's crew put a loaded musket in the sailors mouth and burned matches Inside his islands And when he still didn't or couldn't confess to where the treasure was hidden they shot him I was just kidding. Would you shoot him in the head? There was another torture I read about where they they take you and they hang you up by your penis and a
Starting point is 01:09:45 Hang you up until literally your penis the weight of your body will pull you from away from your penis Yeah, it's bad. Well, it's cool. Yeah, yeah moving on from the William and Mary vane captain veins crew captured the diamond There they hung one sailor by a noose on the ship's mast But cut him down just before he died and when he finally regained consciousness Vane's crew took their time Slashing and stabbing him until he finally bled out on deck. You were all right hanging him was boring Now this rampage had been quite lucrative for vane in the treasure realm But because he and his crew had been so violent the ruling governor of Jamaica
Starting point is 01:10:28 Banned them from spending their gold in Kingston or from even taking up port in Jamaica So vane and a few other pirates set up a pirate settlement in Nassau in the Bahamas Chiefly because the European powers who might bring down the hammer were far too busy with their own wars to travel all the way There for a fight. Okay, this loose Confederacy of pirates was run by a man named Benjamin Hornigold Sometimes referred to in history as Benjamin horny good. That's what all things are fun. He's right. He's just horny He's horny Just listen that ladies that's the voice that Kissel's gonna break out when you know is about bring the chomp down Oh
Starting point is 01:11:27 Hornigold was a mentor to Edward teach aka blackbeard This time the blackbeard first appears in history and that's where we'll pick back up for part two of Blackbeard All right, so now we're really next episode. We're gonna get into it. Well, this whole thing I really felt we talked about this before it felt like there's a lot of things that we all had to know about piracy You know, I've had a very nautical week when we had we we had a chance to go to Hall of Flowers And where did I stay Margaritaville, which makes you feel like you're on a beach? You just being you mean hammered You created an ocean you create concrete became ocean to you exactly
Starting point is 01:12:10 But this we wanted to get into the world of piracy and now we're getting to the actual bio Blackbeard and talking a little bit more of what we know what we don't know How do we know about his bullshit? Don't know and why? He was the style icon of the time that made us know every single thing that we know about piracy Absolutely, and if you are in the four mentioned Amazon warehouse, and you're listening on your earbuds mutinize now You guys raise we're getting rid of the term unionize. It's too weak. You know nice Yeah, you guys you fuckers. Thank you all so much for listening to this episode. Hope everyone's doing well out there
Starting point is 01:12:49 We can't wait to see you on the road. We will be all over Your town. We'll see you next week. We got st. Louis. We got Indianapolis Indianapolis. We got great. We got Toronto and then finally the beacon we're coming home to New York City Can't wait to do it Marcus. Welcome back. Thank you very much. I appreciate it next next week I shall have next week. I shall have more breath And more energy. It's still slowly returning very slowly You allowed yourself you became too comfortable as a robot And he now has to fight back to be human which I understand it takes a minute because I got it because all the nano machines
Starting point is 01:13:26 That are now filling your blood. Yeah, there we go. We just got this episode flagged again. That's fantastic Yes, Marcus, you can't see him at home, but he has these full of steroids stronger than ever. It's really good Huge It's actually been so distracting Anyway, wow, and thanks for sending your love and support Thank you very much very much. Thank you everyone for being so very very sweet But you know, honestly, we're like on the precipice of what what's being cool Look at Wayne Cone one of the coolest beds of all time with flame ellipse. He got covered
Starting point is 01:14:03 Thank you for Wayne Cones probably had cove it about three or four times All right, everyone, thank you for supporting us. Thank you for everything. We can't wait to see you on the road Hey, there's a Again mug of star lesions. Yeah, I'm when you're on the high seas. Make sure you check your blowhole. That's Thank you captain diabetes They're taking up to the knee One finger or two in the blowhole You could jam three or four in there if she's ready to go
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