Last Podcast On The Left - Episode 576: Armin Meiwes Part I - Cannibal Café

Episode Date: June 7, 2024

Dinner is served! This week the boys begin the twisted tale of Armin Meiwes, a German former computer repair technician better known as the Rotenburg Cannibal or Der Metzgermeister (The Master Butcher), who in 2001 murdered, dismembered, and consumed the flesh of a voluntary victim he met on the web.

Hello! Ed Larson and Amber Nelson from the Brighter Side here to check in with you see how you're doing. Is your day more disappointing than a gas station sandwich? Are you trying to put one foot in front of the other in a glue factory? Did you try to throw your air fryer in the bathtub but nothing happened because you were too lazy to plug it in first? Then the Brighter Side podcast is for you! Oh yeah! Each week we take nasty, dooky, stupid, dumb... Stinky, no good, doo-doo factory... Boo!

...caca-like topics and try to find the Brighter Side. Hey, Amber, what's the Brighter Side of waking up chained to a bed in Russia? Um, at least they have free healthcare. That's right! So start your weekend off right every Friday with the brighter side on The Last Podcast Network. You beautiful babies. ["The Last Podcast Network"] There's no place to escape to.

This is the last podcast. On the left. Heh heh. Why, fuck your glades. That's when the cannibalism started. Who was that? Oh, man. We got it. You're you're at Dalton. Yo yo yo yo yo tee tee yo yo tee tee. Oh man.

Look I got it. You're at Dalton. Yo yo tee tee. Oh yo tee tee. Man, I just think of that music playing over a bunch of Hummel figures cutting each other's dicks off. Oh look at the last podcast on the left ladies and gentlemen. My name is Marcus Parks.

We have Yo Hee Hee Henry Zabrowski. Hit me with the polka. is Marcus parks. We have your he Henry Zabrowski. Just remember, this is the soundtrack of this entire story. I maintain that the soundtrack of this entire story is high. No, but we'll get to that on episode two. And of course, where this is at Larson. Hello. I can't wait to eat some dick. Don't worry. Your time will come soon.

And truly one of the worst things about all of this dick isn't even that good. No, no. Dick is also is actually impossible to cook. And the reason why we're talking about cooking dicks is because today we're going to be talking about Armin Mivis der Rottenberg Cannibal. Yeah, the most charming man in Rottenberg. He is the only ever said was that he was classy. Yeah.

Well, Armin Mivus, aka the Rottenberg Cannibal, was a German middle-aged loner who, in 2001, killed and ate a man that he'd met on the internet, a guy named Bernd Brandes. The twist is that Brandes had not only volunteered to be killed and eaten, but was on the internet specifically to find someone who would fulfill his suicidal sexual urge. The internet's like four years old at this point. People are already finding each other and eating each other.

This is back when the internet was truly nasty. Oh, it really was. Yeah, these were the nasty days of the internet. What do you mean, Marcus? The fact that there was necrobabes.org that you could actively post upon, and it was just on the normal internet. It is just on the regular ass internet. But I want to remind you guys that this series, we cover true crime a lot.

And this isn't true crime. This is true romance. This is the story about the most romantic weekend that ever happened in Germany besides the time when Hitler killed himself. The morals of such an arrangement were of course the subject of much discussion during Armin's trial, but some Germans saw the humor in the situation. You see it's very funny. They gave him the additional nickname of der Metzgemeister, meaning the master butcher.

He did it in a fairly efficient way. I extremely efficient way. I saw the pictures. Of the neatly wrapped piles of meat. Yeah, I mean, they have the pictures of unfortunately, they have the pictures from the film, they have stills from the film out there. And I did look at them.

Yeah. Did you have deli paper? Yes. Very much. That's awesome. You know, that's why he was damn. My, my, my stuff. I know we'll get more into it, but did he make sausage? Yeah. He made everything. He made sausage. He made bacon. We got to wait. We'll see you next week. Let's just stop now. But as far as Armand Mivas goes, while his story is not a one-to-one comparison, it's sort of like what would have happened if a guy like Ed Gein had the internet. And yes, I know that Ed Gein is not a cannibal.

We know that he's not a cannibal, but these guys are spiritual cousins. If he had the internet, he might have been a cannibal. He would have been presented as an option. Which is funny is that I feel like that, weirdly, I feel like the internet would have given them a lot more pushback about looking for cadavers where there was something about this within the actual fantasy of it, that they were all, I still don't know if Ed Gein was great at improv. Well, we're going to look at, we're going to definitely talk people about people later who frequent Necrophile forums. So I don't think Ed Gein would have gotten any pushback.

God bless America and the internet. Hey, what are you talking about America? This is the world, my friend, the world wide web. You know, we can think for all of this Al Gore. This is the time that he gets the credit. Yeah. Sustainable meat, non-gas, low carbon footprint if you eat the entire thing. There are other parallels between Gein and Mavis that are hard to ignore. Both had a bizarre, worshipful relationship with their domineering mothers and the general consensus on both men was that they were oddballs who never fit in anywhere.

In Germany, by the way, oddballs are often called either der Spinner or der Komisch, which literally, der Komisch literally translates to the funny one. Oh, I feel that I was, I said both of those in a derogatory fashion when we were in Berlin. Look at der Spinner here. Yeah, I mean like, I know what that means. Okay buddy, I saw what's eating Gildedberg grape. I know what you're saying buddy, alright? And yeah, I am stupid. But this guy, he's very, like again, he's a romantic, and I just love the concept of like,

even if the point out that they were oddballs. Yeah. They say like, oh, this guy's Viet. Yeah. Yeah. Well, additionally, Mivas also lived alone in a gigantic creepy farmhouse that he inherited after his mother died, just like gene located in the tiny village of Vustafeld. The 36 room farmhouse remained totally unchanged after Armin's mother died, although it did, like Gein's place, get pretty messy by the end. They were pretty dependent on mommy. Yes.

Well that, you know, just chopping up a human being makes it pretty messy. Technically that was when he was the most neat. But even before Armand's crimes came to light, his home was known by the local kids as the haunted house, even though, as we'll get into later, an actual Satanist black magic once lived next door to Armin. This is honestly, this is one of those where we were, when we do our research, you never know what comes up. Yeah.

You never know. And this was on our list and there was something we were moving our schedule around. We're like, Oh, I've always wanted to do the Armin Midas story. I've always wanted to do this. And it was like, oh, it'll be a good like one parter. We'll get into it. We'll talk about the murder. His childhood is one of the funniest single stories that has laid out.

I was so just like, wowed. Yeah. How? So was I. Just write down the pipe for us. That's what the story was. Oh, man. He's a fucking, it's crazy. Yeah, how so was I just write down the pipe for us? Man he's a fucking gets crazy. It's a good thing Rudolph Steiner's here But the big difference between Ed Gein and Armand Mavis besides of course the fact that Gein wasn't a cannibal He's still saying that I'm just making sure that everybody knows stick up for his boy

saying that. I'm just making sure that everybody knows. Everyone's gonna stick up for his boy. The big difference is that Mivis eventually found another person in this world who was on his exact same wavelength, although that relationship was, by its very nature, short and sweet, if you'll excuse the expression. I think it was short and savory. if you'll excuse the expression. I think it was short and savory. You see, I can feel that motion now, is that as soon as Bernt got off that train and Armin saw him for the very first time, he heard this magical sound.

Rob. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh uhhhhhhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh uhhhh Thank you Robin. Thank you. True Romance Now for our source today, we've got Cannibal, the story behind the Maneater of Rottenberg by Lois Jones, which is good enough, but does tend to fall into the unfortunately common true crime literature trap of having weird and outdated opinions on homosexuality. I don't know what the fuck it is these true crime writers, but they just

either willfully want to misunderstand it or they just want I think they want to give everything like that little extra nasty edge. Everything has got to be slightly grimy from their perspective. You kind of feel that sort of like dirty noir edge. Also, the main issue is that a full misunderstanding of what BDSM is. Immediately saying that that's all homosexuals do is whip each other. And again, we've talked about this many times.

You did this in the Andrew Coonhandon series about how gay people are largely extremely boring. Well, they're just people. I mean, it's like there's no more or less BDSM in the gay community than there is in the straight community. I'm sure there's plenty of cuddle. Oh, there's a lot of cuddle. A lot.

But otherwise... I mean, we'll get to that later. Like, that's really all Armin wanted. Besides, you know, to eat and kill someone. He wanted to cuddle him with his duodenum. He literally wanted to cuddle him with his colon in his guts. That is his actual motive. But this story, though, has more detail about his life than any other source I found.

Yeah, the facts that are presented are solid. So let's get into the story of the Rottenberg Cannibal. Armin Mivis was born in 1961 to a domineering and difficult woman named Valdraud Mivis, who was almost 40 when she gave birth to Armin. Valdroud and Armin actually look quite a bit alike with deep set eyes, thin lips, and long sharp noses. It's your classic German goblin face. You know exactly what he's saying right? Oh absolutely yeah, faking it. Those people are disgusting. We love the German people. How do you claim he's one of the most beautiful women in the world? No but these people they're fucking they're Nos for autos Well, yeah these guys this is a it's a bad batch. I think that a lot of the Germans are extremely beautiful They're beautiful people but there's a reason why the fucking about why Werner Herzog did one did the best nos for autos. Yes

He knows a nose for autos. Yeah, he's gotten milk from a nose for He knows a Nosferatu. He's gotten milk from a Nosferatu. They're like, these guys are, it is wild. I have never seen such a couple that if you threw a wig on the sun, he would look just like the mother. And if you know anything about Armin Mivis, which is like the more and more stuff I watch, all they ever do is focus on the teeth. They always zoom in on the teeth. Well of course, Because he ate people. Yes. He also has a massive mouth.

And so does the mother. Like a wolf's mouth filled with huge ass teeth. Very frightening. Very frightening people. Now Armin was Valdroud's third child, but Armin's father, Dieter, was Waldschraud's second husband and they had custody of two boys from their first marriage. Their names were Ingbert and Wulfgang.

Yes, one was a composer and the other one sold piss. For a while things were okay. How much is piss? Honestly, super cheap. How much is piss? Honestly, super cheap. Market price. Well, for a while, things were okay for the Mivas family. They lived primarily in the West German city of Essen, but spent their summers about three

hours away at the aforementioned farmhouse near the town of Rotenberg. But when Armen was between the ages of six and eight, Dieter, Ingbert, and Wolfgang all began leaving one by one. First, Ingbert joined his father in Berlin, and Armin's father left soon after. Reportedly, Dieter left Armin with Voltraud because he believed, quote, that he would turn out okay. Yeah, he'll be fine. I gotta go. go I think he read the room yes and voltrod I mean I'm not to speak ill of the dead big heinous bitch with a name like voltrod she does sound like she tries to kill the smurfs each week voltrod even worse voltrod. Face like a cannibal.

And so he would, she, they were already having a lot of marriage difficulty. Like it wasn't a happy home and, but it was just kind of the way that he left. Cause he just jumped ship and it's almost, he really, it was like, I'm going to take the good boys. You guys are going to be normal. I could tell that immediately. You're coming with me. And they were like, daddy, daddy, we want to go with daddy. It wasn't even, I'm going to take the good boys. It

was like, I'm out because the boys went to their real father. Yeah. Like the way they told us that like, like he was, you know, Armin was out front, like playing in the garden. He heard a door slam and that was the fucking last time he saw his dad. I mean, unfortunately, anybody who ends up as a cannibal, that is one of the last sounds you hear from your father Literally, it's the Simpsons bit. It's the Promise You'll come back will you bring some more sausages

Will you bring some more sausages? Yeah. Yeah, son, definitely. See you soon. Well, finally, Wolfgang joined Ingbert in Berlin, leaving Armin and Waltraud all alone. As a result, Armin decidedly did not turn out okay. Now with Armin being the only male in Waltraud's life, she put all her emotions and energies into bullying and controlling this little boy. She was embittered, middle-aged, and it felt like her second marriage, the one that produced

Armin, had ruined her life. There's no coming back and this little boy's going to pay for it. As such, Armin became essentially her lifelong manservant as punishment, to the point where she would call him mention Yeah mention it's an affectionate term. Yes, but it's an affectionate term for a girl and in old German it also meant servant She knew how those two words mean the same exact thing Come here you fat little girl. Like if she kept calling you a fat little girl and you had to go over and like, come on fat little girl, go get me some juice. She definitely called me fat. And it's like, who the fuck do you think did that? You're feeding me!

You did this to me! Oh yeah. Yeah, didn't your mother like guilt you for not finishing your plate telling you that you didn't love her because you didn't eat her food? Yeah. Yeah, here's a dozen stuffed cabbage. Fat boy. Yeah, yeah, being like, I can't tell.

But then if you only eat four, she's like, Oh, that's fine. I guess you don't like it as much as you used to. But just like good ol Augusta Gein, Valtraud Mivis were a permanent expression of disapproval for everything although unlike Augusta, Valtraud had no religion whatsoever to justify her behavior. Really she was driven by nothing but pure secular hatred, mostly stemming from the failure of her two marriages. I have a weird, just immediate, off the cuff,

not an expert opinion. Where it's like, you can kind of see. Yeah, go figure. Yeah, yeah. No thinking required. Let's hear opinion from Der Spinner. Yeah. Hey. Chocolate?

Don't you dare keep calling me der Spinner. During this entire process I'm going to be pissed off. Don't tell us! I know. Matt, what are you doing? I just thought of doing it now. It's just the German version of my spinny character. What are you talking about there, Spinners?

Alright, so... Did you see the essential difference between Ed Gein being raised in a religious household where there was a lot of kind of religiosity in what he was doing? Like he made crucifixes and he did all these kind of weird things. It was kind of like, oddly, oddly in a funny way shame-based He hid them he put them away where Armin Mivis is like the example of what Ed Geed is Put in a Montessori school almost in a way of like it's almost like this is a secular way of fucking you up So that not only is it like it's a special new batch of fucked up But then it leads to his style of what he did which is like technically the most responsible form of murder

Cannibalism we've ever seen quote unquote. It's so extraordinarily respectful and he's a he's like He's a humanist He's a humanist. He's a humanist. Literally. Entirely a humanist. He's a humivore. Now to fill her days, because Valtrow did not work, she tried writing a history of her own family line, giving accounts of her forefathers in the Napoleonic Wars and the First World

War. There was no word, however, on whether or not she included her family's military history between 1933 and 1945, if such a history existed at all It was a short short chapter that just said yada yada yada Don't you worry about that one now to put it mildly Armin Mivis was not a well-liked child. He was known as a mama's boy child. He was known as a mama's boy, the akomish, the oddball. This opinion was only reinforced by the fact that Armand's mother insisted that he always dress in traditional Bavarian style lederhosen at all times. Just the idea

of a little six-year-old pre-cannibal dressed up as lederhosen because he never he never was normal. Was he fat? No. No, that's too bad. Yeah, right? Yeah We said the same. No, you're just thinking of Udder from the Simpsons once again. I know, I know. You gotta fill out those later hosens. Don't chase me, I'm full of chocolate. I'm full of chocolate too. But that's my honestly like skinny guys at later hosens. What is this Epcot? Yeah. I wanna see a big fat guy. Like if you're in Lederhosen, you better be pushing on them buttons. You ever seen the pictures of Hitler in Lederhosen? It's very, I like, I think Lederhosen is fun. Yeah. You would look great in it.

I'm built for it. You really would. I have a body for Lederhosen. Yeah. Lederhosen does, it does, it does flatter the egg shaped man. Yes, of course it does. Oh, Hitler's very stylish. I'm looking at these pictures of him and his leader, Hosen. Ooh, what elegant ankles. Oh yeah. Suspenders would be great

for you. Oh, Natalie's already said that that's probably in my future. I mean, yeah, it has to be your pants fall down all the time. Yeah. Belts aren't going to work after a while. Now later Hosen. It's all right, my baby, just finish. I'm least a little during the summers when Armin and his mother would stay at their farmhouse in the country. But until he was 16, Armin and his mother lived in the city of Essen. This is in the middle of one of the biggest metropolitan areas in Germany. And this was during the 70s when Lederhosen in a city would have been noticeably weird

Yeah, there's probably a lot of der spinners flying around as he's on the bus and his later hosted in the little hat with the feathers sticking out of it Just going, just like looking at everybody that's got fucking sweat coming down there like they're being steamed Can I lick your hand please? Now to me the lederhosen seemed to be a tactic to keep other children away from her son because even when kids knocked on their door to see if Armand could come out to play, Valtraud always insisted that Armand was grounded and wasn't allowed to leave the house. She fed him a superiority complex.

So that's weirdly like that's how I view it. It's like between. Yes, it is infantilizing making him a child right like constantly and isolating it specifically But also she's doing it's feeding him a line of we do this because we're better than others Yeah, we do this because we are this we are the she viewed in her delusional mind Like like she I think I see her as like a Bavarian countess in her own brain where she's like doing her historiography and dressing him up in traditional clothing and basically showing everyone being like weird different

were a step aside were outside of your modern modernity which makes a special and I actually weirdly think that is a one of the driving forces behind Armin is a sense of superiority in a way where he does believe my philosophical cannibalism makes me a homo sapien 2.0. And in some cases that really was like not to get too far off off topic here, but that was in many ways like a symptom of like post-World War II Germany. Like this idea of we're going back like 1933 to 1945. That didn't happen. Like Germany was a, is a wonderful place full of a very wonderful culture. And so going back to pre

1933, that kind of erases like the guilt when it comes to the German people. It's a fascinating subject. But she may have been, you know, she may have comes to the German people. It's a fascinating subject. But she may have been, you know, she may have been one of those people. Yeah. I just can't believe all the people they put in ovens. He's the Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. taking out the trash, and this was all under strict orders from his mother. But even if Armin made it past his mother to play with the other kids, it's possible

that what was already going on within his inner world, it's possible that would have scared off any potential playmates. Because this shit was life long. Armin was obsessed with Brothers Grimm fairy tales, which were German by the way, but Armin was particularly fascinated with the story of Hansel and Gretel. Absolutely, I love the idea of being fed to death by a witch. Oh my god, please. I think it's currently happening.

I feed me to death next to a witch. But instead of identifying with the kids, Armin would pretend to be the witch, and he would play at fattening up Hansel in particular so he could cook and eat him. No one likes this game. None of the kids like feeder, gainer games. I mean, it sounds delightful. I know again, we're 40 plus men. We understand good things.

Yeah. But how much candy could you can't eat that much candy. Not anymore. No, no, no. Bad for the teeth. Yeah, me too. But yeah, back in the day I could have had so much. Yeah. I actually, I had to quit Pez because it was destroying my teeth and I love Pez more than anything. That's a huge, huge problem. The fact that he ate so many Pez, it was literally destroying

his mouth. You just like eating out of Donald Duck's neck. You do remember my favorite dispenser was my Donald Duck dispenser. You do remember. That's really nice that you remember that. was my Donald Duck dispenser. You do remember. That's really nice that you remember that. Now it's impossible to point to the Hansel and Gretel story or some other experience and say this is why eating people made Armin horny. But Hansel and Gretel. I mean, we're all trying to ask the question. We are, but Hansel and Gretel seems to be the beginning of Armin's fantasies. They're the first building blocks of an extremely abnormal Psychological landscape because we spoke with Katherine Ramson about BTK's childhood a little bit She went into a little bit and she could we spoke about on the update show

Yes update on the left and part partly it really indicates that There is some Connection we're already seeing connections all over the place Jeffrey Dahmer, right? it really indicates that there is some connection. We're already seeing connections all over the place. Jeffrey Dahmer, right? Jeffrey Dahmer had that, what was it, Nowhere Land? Infinity Land. Infinity Land.

So he'd go out and so when he was a little boy, he would start going away and playing with like dead body parts of animals that he'd find. He'd make little shrines and he did all this weird shit alone and BTK also apparently was having some fantasies. He was a little kid, he he did all this weird shit alone and BTK also apparently was having some Fantasies little kid he was doing all this kind of shit But it's interesting to see like that this was like another example of how it was baked in It started as a little boy

Yeah, he had these thoughts and it never stopped like it was it's this shit was rampant since he was five Yeah, which is fascinating Yep, I sadly I also want all the documentary material. I watched on this. It's like they're not my normal documentaries actual documentaries I The way everybody talks about this case is all just been like and would you believe there everyone's so fat? It's so happy Like you know everybody's just like, yeah, and he did this other thing.

So I get into that zone. No, he's an actual, well, I'm not a literal ghoul. He's a half ghoul, because ghouls technically are creatures that eat dead bodies. Oh yeah, sure. He did eat a dead body. But he started when he was alive.

Yeah. Yeah, but he finished a year later. I see a ghoul as someone who digs up a grave and eats the dead body. But he started when he was alive. Yeah. Yeah, but he finished a year later. I see a ghoul as someone who digs up a grave and eats the dead body. He's a ghoul. I think if there was a ghoul club and they were all talking about it, they'd let him in. I think you need one letter of recommendation from another ghoul and that's it. He definitely made human ghoulish. Yes, he did. Well, the other part of the equation, which is sort of a chicken-or-the-egg type of thing, is that while Armin had little independence, he would sometimes sneak away to neighboring farms during those summers in Vustafeld.

It was on those farms that Armin would eagerly watch pigs, ducks, hens, geese, and deer get slaughtered on a very regular basis. Armin would later describe these slaughters as his fondest childhood memories. Dude, it was like his television. Yeah, but that's all to say that it's hard to tell whether he associated happiness with slaughter and that wired up his brain incorrectly or if the slaughter was what made him happy in the first place. Chicken or egg? I mean, I don't know. There were plenty of kids to hang out with. There was still television.

They said there were very few kids in Wustfeld. He could have found one. There was one. Every weird kid I've ever met had one separate other weirdo play, spinner friend. Actually, he did have one friend. One of the documentaries that I watched, they did talk to a kid. Mr. Stunk.

Yeah, the way he said like, VU state, he had a pony and Viva takes a pony and ride it into the forest. But it was also, it was a weird game. Cause he said that like, it was weird that he'd come over and his later hosted it and they had an old fashioned horse and carriage and he would get into his horse and carriage and ride it around this little town and he'd be like, that's as far as mother allows me to go. He'd be like, literally you have to go. And then he'd kick him out of the carriage. Like he was some horrible version of Cinderella.

So, but yeah, he, it's just straight, I mean. I wonder if the guy who was killing all these pigs in front of him like started like, you know, like playing it up a little bit, putting on a show, you know. There it comes, that big old cleaver, and going inside them guts. And he's just like, this is the best show I have ever seen in my life.

The guy is killing these animals. He's not like, get out of here, kid. No, because at the time, honestly though, I do feel like it's a little bit of like this is a art form According to if you're a normal like butcher if you're just a butcher. That's a good job. Well, these aren't butchers These are just people who are killing animals. Yeah, yeah, and they could also see as like oh, yeah kids need to get used to This stuff. Yeah, it's a farm. You're gonna get used to it and I probably he probably goes. Ah gets me the hook Ah get me the other piercer

Well really though Armin said that all he wanted was to be accepted and hugged could it really could have knocked that out quick then Yeah, yeah mama could have really hooked knocked both of those things out So he invented an imaginary friend named Frankie to help with his loneliness. Frankie was the bad guy. You didn't want to be anywhere near Frankie. Well, Armand would tell Frankie he loved him, and Frankie would say he loved him back. I love you too, Armand. So far so good. Yeah, and tellingly though, Frankie would be the name Armand would use years later as his handle when he was trawling various cannibalism forums for a man who was willing to be killed

and eaten. Armin said he started fantasizing about eating little boys and girls between the ages of 8 and 12. He would spend night after night lying awake in bed going through every motion of killing, butchering, and eating a child, emulating what he'd seen on the neighboring farms. During one of his interviews, and I believe this, he said you'll be surprised how difficult it is to make friends when all you imagine is what your friends nipple tastes like Thanks Armin

But just like Dennis Rader Fantasized about torturing and killing Annette Funicello at around the same age while watching the Mickey Mouse Club Armin Mivas's prepubescent fantasies revolved around flipper. Mm-hmm Mivis's prepubescent fantasies revolved around Flipper. Let's just continue on. It was just guide on Henry's birthday. We know, we know. Committed dolphin suicide on my birthday. That's true.

Now for those of you unfamiliar with Flipper, it was a mid-60s TV show about a boy and his dolphin. But the titular animal was not Armand's focus. Rather, he was obsessed with the boy child actor Luke Halpin. Yeah, if he was obsessed with Flipper, the dolphin, he might have been a scientist. Yeah. Or he might have been a marine biologist or he might have been a dolphin hunter. Yeah, but he would have been obsessed with fucking Flipper and we would have began his story would have been in and out of the news real fast. You think about him. Yeah. If you went to go books would be written about him. No, but if you wanted to go fuck flipper, guess what flipper fucks back

That's what you got to be careful My mistake, he's gonna roll in easily fuck flipper flippers gonna fucking just ruin your weekend All right, that kid does look delicious We're gonna cut this out but i've been saying that Looking at the old footage, I'm like, yum, is that a memory? Yum, that is tasty. And dolphins are filled with mercury anyway, you can't eat them. Well, Halpin's character, Sandy Ricks, was just the kind of perfect, popular, successful boy that Armin so desperately wanted to be.

Oh boy! No, hey, that's what he wished he could be! And Armin came to believe, as many cannibals do, that if he were to only consume Sandy Ricks, then he would take on all of the same characteristics and abilities of his hero while also fulfilling a sexual urge. Hey there, Flipper, there's this man who wants to sexually cannibalize me. What are we gonna do? You're right, I'll strangle him in his sleep.

Excellent, I'll pretend to be into it and then I'll wait until he's most vulnerable and I'll kill him while he can't know. Flipper, stop flirting with me. Stop it Flipper. Stop it. I told you to stop flirting with me. I'm gonna put an end to this right now. I'm going to put it into this right now. Put it into this right now.

Well, according to Armin, he ran this idea about consuming and internalizing Sandy Ricks. He ran this past his imaginary friend, Frankie, and Frankie thought that the idea of killing and eating another boy to steal his power was a pretty good idea. All Frankie gave him was thumbs up. It was like, sounds like you were thinking what I was thinking. Flipper, however, was just one half of Armand's media obsessions. He also loved horror movies, of course, particularly the gory ones. If I had to guess, I'd imagine Armin was a fan of movies like the 1976 German slasher Mosquito der Shonda, released elsewhere as Bloodlust.

Ooh, that'd show off. The plot revolves around a clerk who collects puppets, but also murders women and drinks their blood with a glass straw, then writes Mos mosquito on the walls of the rooms where his victims are found. Kind of sounds like a giallo movie. Yeah. Oh no, I would imagine you probably did see some giallo movies that came over. You might've seen Suspiria. I don't know if like Blood Feast came all the way over from America.

You know, Herschel Gordon Lewis. Yeah, I doubt he saw Blood Feast. I doubt he saw Blood Feast. But you know, there's plenty of like that weird 60s style of gory, you know that I Yeah, the weird stuff The fluorescent red blood Yeah, that I personally love and I think actually is actually scarier because it feels like you're watching a dream rather than you know Some like realistic gore. I much prefer Herschel Gordon Lewis gore

You know what really scared me the most of everything you just said was the glass straw. Yeah, right It's that's something about a glass. I mean, obviously it could just break in your mouth but it's terrifying. But it might be good for the environment. Who knows? Who knows? Now before puberty, the idea of cutting open chests, ripping out hearts, livers, and lungs, then eating them raw while they were still warm, this simply made Armin feel good inside. It's like how another kid might fantasize about it'd be awesome if I could fly. Yeah, he was just like, man, I'd love the flop of pancreas around. Like literally nothing would make, think about a little boy that if you ask him for Santa, like if he went to Sinterklaas and got on his little knee and he'd go like, hey little

almond, what would you like for Christmas? And he'd just be like, I bought it made out of human intestines. He's like, hmm, we'll have to. How about a football? Oh, pigskin. No. No. But around the age of 12, Armand found that these thoughts about handling organs, eating organs, these were now extremely arousing thoughts.

And as a result, he would find himself, as Henry said, gazing longingly at a male classmate's bare chest while asking himself what their nipples would taste like. And I tell you what, they taste like nipples. Yeah, chewy. Yeah, the rest of the chest, except chewier. Just lick a guy. Honestly, when it comes down to it,

why do you gotta eat them? Just lick them. Be like a sommelier, but for a guy. Yeah, but you know what it's like. I mean, that's the thing though, is if you were to just lick a hamburger, would you really get the flavor profile? Have you ever sucked a hamburger? It was one of the dumber conversations we've ever had. Ooh, hamburger, I just want to suck you up.

I want to suck you. Make it nice and wet. Now once Armand turned 16, he and his mother moved from Essen to the 36-room farmhouse in Vustafeld permanently, which wasn't that much of a change because neither one of them had any friends or family in Essen anyway. But while Voltroud had grand dreams of a majestic country home, she didn't have the money to properly maintain a 36-room farmhouse because she lived solely off the meager alimony paid by her two ex-husbands. That house is beautiful.

It is gorgeous, or it was until it was burned down by the locals. That's what happens when a fairy tale monster lives inside a very nice piece of property. Even so, she still gave each room in the farmhouse a grand name, like Sonnenglanz, meaning sunlight, or Frutau, meaning Mountain Dew. Mountain Dew? Yeah. Rose, there was something called cold red? Excuse me, Morning Dew, not mountain dude.

That would be fucking wholesome if there was a fucking X Games room near me! There would never have to be a cannibal! This is my room, Sierra Mane! Yes! Let me mutilate him in the sunny delight room! If anywhere it would be in the surge room. Shots fired. Tellingly though, even though Armin was 16, Valtraud insisted that his room be called

Kindesimma, or the child's room. The child's room. He was also not unwilling. He was very much a willing mama's boy. He loved this lifestyle. He was also not unwilling. He was very much a willing mama's boy. Oh, he loved it. He loved this lifestyle. Now the small village of Wustefeld was made up of a friendly, close-knit community

of residents who held regular parties and barbecues where the whole town would be invited. A bunch of happy-smiling German farmers. And what did it sound like, Rob? ["The Merry-Go-Round March"] ["The Merry-Go-Round March"] ["The Merry-Go-Round March"] Come to the non-human barbecue!

Why does he keep saying that? Continue right there. Well these barbecues included Armin and Valtroud. Even though everyone in town knew that these were the town spinners. The townsfolk felt we can't leave them out. We can't invite everyone except the fucking weirdos. Down spinners. I just feel like that's the new, that's the new slur. We're gonna have to deal with it. We got a week.

We can use spinners for a little while longer. I just think of the spinners and I feel bad. Yeah, the spinners. Der spinners. Der spinners. An all German cover band of the spinners. You and I will save that for our VFW tour. Ready? Well, inviting dash spinners proved to be a bad idea because during one, actually the, I got to do it. It's dish. That would be the plural for dash. Spina. Okay. Inviting

dish. Spina proved to be a bad idea, because during one barn party, Valdraud marched to the center of the barn at 10 p.m. and began shouting that the music was too loud. She hated loud music, and the party had to stop immediately on her say so because it's too late to be that loud. Jesus Christ, lady.

Yeah. Now one adult neighbor took a special interest in Armin because he thought Valdroud's treatment of the young boy was unfair. He thought that it might be stunting his growth a little. The neighbor had a chat with Valdroud over a glass of wine and he got her to agree to let Armin attend the next party on his own. It sounds like when the principal visited Forrest Gump's mom. But even without his mother, Armand, who was always more comfortable with children, just like Ed Gein, Armand chose to not mingle with the other teenagers and instead spent the whole party

sitting at the kids' table. In 1968, however, the village of Wustefeld became infinitely more interesting when a new neighbor moved in next door to Armin and Voltroud. She was a self-avowed witch, Satanist, and published a cult author named Ulla von Bernis who publicly claimed that she could cast Death spells on anyone in the world. This lady is a character and fun as fuck What a great neighbor like especially for this because again everybody it is homo figurines including the scary ones Yeah, there is all every character from a German thing is there. You got the cannibal, you got the weird,

wistful boy cannibal, you got the domineering, big-titted evil mom, you got the fucking beautiful Bavarian forest witch, who probably at some point transforms into something else, you know? Like transforms into like a mere cat. She transforms into a faun and scampers into the force and lead you to your death. No it just makes me want to go to fucking Germany. Yeah now as opposed to Ed Gein's highly Christian mother Augusta, Voltrad Mivis embraced the evil. Oh my

god I just looked up a picture of her I never saw her before. She looks like Toni Clifton. She looks like Toni Clifton. I might have to take all this back. You mean my Ulla von Bernis? Oh my god. Yeah, you like California witches. You like German witches. Yeah, German witches. No, I love German witches.

Old world witches are an entirely different breed, my friend. Hey man, I will fuck Baba Yaga. I have no problems with it. Well, Waltraud Marivis soon became close friends with Ulla von Bernis. Now, even though she sounds kind of goofy, Ulla von Bernis had serious occult cred. Her godfather was Rudolf Steiner, one of the biggest names in the occult game during the late 19th and early 20th centuries. This was a guy who rubbed elbows with Madame Helena Blavatsky. So for Eddie, just so you know, Madame Helena Blavatsky, HPB, HPB that we call her. She, that is what she's called.

And she is a pain in the ass master occultist from back in the day that wrote this massive book called the doctrine of the secret doctrine. And what it is is in a, an occult explanation of the history of the world and Rudolph Steiner, we did a series on Madame Blavatsky and she is one of the most impressive con women slash true recult masters of all time. Like she's a big, big deal. She's one of the secretly one of the biggest influences on the 20th century. Yes. Like I mean, the shock waves of what this woman did, uh, you know,

reverberate, still reverberate to this day. Sort of led to Nazism and then Rudolph Steiner was a guy that was like, basically he was, uh, he was a compatriot to her and then he broke off and did his own thing. He created the things called the Waldorf schools. Have you heard of the Waldorf schools? It's like a super intense version of a Montessori school where they basically teach you about aligning your spirit and soul with your intellect. And Rudolf Steiner was all about this idea that you could apply scientific method

to the psychic sciences. And then he obviously had some issues because anybody who's a dramatic origin, there seems to be some racial implications at the very bottom of their works, no matter what they do. Alternative history. Yes, a lot of alternative history. Pseudo-historian is what how Rudolf Scheiner is often referred to. But technically he was one of the first guys to be like Hitler's bad, went during the 1910s

where he's like, this guy's bad news. And he started basically doing the anti-Nzi thing at the very, very beginning. And they fucked them up. Yeah. They'd fucked them up real bad. Yeah. Now, Ulla, however, like Rudolf Steiner, serious occultist. Very, very serious.

Very, very high level. One of the big names. He's one of the classy ones. Yeah. He like ran Hogwarts, but instead of wizard, it was witches. Yeah. That's what I took from that anyway. Yeah, take that.

That's fine. Good. Eddie, your occult education, you know, you're a very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, it was witches. Yeah. That's what I took from that anyway. Yeah, take that. That's fine. Yes. Eddie, your occult education has not yet begun. We haven't chosen...

I'll give you the secret doctrine. We have not yet chosen what your first occult episode is going to be. Okay. Yeah, but we're going to choose wisely. Trust me. Yeah. Good. But Ula, she's more of like an Anton LeVay.

You know Anton LeVay, right? Yes. Yes that well we've only hung out once or twice But Ola someone who liked to play the part she liked to put on a show Yes, for example when she moved in next door to Armin and Voltroud She painted her house black and switched the standard doorbell mechanism Switch that with a skull that had the doorbell button affixed to its outstretched tongue. Inside, Ula decorated her walls with paintings of Lucifer and various other devilish imagery, and this is in addition to her altar fully dedicated to worshiping and communing with Satan himself.

And he's busy. Yeah. Yeah. Claiming herself to be a satanic priestess, Ula would hold black masses to contact Satan so he could give her the power she needed to kill people with black magic. This is very German version. These spells however were not random. This is very German version. These spells, however, were not random. Basically, killing people with black magic was Ula's job, and this service cost anywhere between 200 and 1000 marks depending on the client and the target.

I think she had a sliding scale. Yeah, oh yeah, I'm honestly very responsible of her. It's a very nice thing to do as a business owner. I will say to you, remember, magical actions, any form of hex will come back on you. So it's never ever really a good thing to do unless you, it's very, very specific and honestly needs to remain largely positive. The thing about Ula is that also when you pay to have someone do something like this

outside of you, it also, it's very, how do you say, it's easy for it to go wrong. Yeah. Well, the process was that she would cast a spell then soon after the target would die in a car accident Fall down a flight of stairs or have some other fatal accident and from what she claimed She had a 90% success rate nine out of ten. So she's a fucking assassin And indeed, she did have plenty of customers who made the trip out to Wustefell, but they were mostly women who wanted to sentence unfaithful husbands to untimely deaths. Now incredibly, and this is part of the reason why I'm fascinated with Germany, Ulla von Bernis became a beloved local character who could be found gambling

at the nearby casino when she wasn't casting black magic spells on wayward husbands. But as she put it, Satan never helped her gamble because he, quote, has more important things to do. Others in Germany, however, took Ulla's claims very seriously. She was briefly involved in a murder trial in the mid-1980s in which a defendant claimed that he ordered a death curse from Ulla but carried out the murder himself when it didn't work. Yeah, he had a fuck and he's like, God damn it, now I gotta go kill her.

Yeah, she can't get blamed for that. No, she was just consulted, like, because she was just a part of the whole thing. She's like, yeah, he asked me. Yeah, I did it. Yeah, it can't get blamed for that. No, she didn't. She was just consulted like because she was just a part of the whole thing. She's like, yeah, he asked me. Yeah, I did it. Yeah, it didn't work. It didn't work. I told him he signed the paper. He saw the thing. It does not guarantee results. It's not guaranteed. He was in that 10%. After that, Ulla earned the title of the most famous witch in Germany. And that's huge. That's like being the most famous asshole in California.

Now just a few years before that murder both Valtroud and Armin were spending a lot of time hanging out with Ulla. For Armin though, the Satanist stuff, he didn't really give a shit about that. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, what he cared about was that she was like the witch from Hansel and Gretel. She was like the witch from Hansel and Gretel though, like that's not an exaggeration. By 1985, however, around the time of the aforementioned murder trial, Ulla moved out of the Black House in Wustfeldt and rented an apartment in nearby Bad Hamburg. Bad Hamburg? Yeah, and Armin was once again left alone with his mother.

Left to his own devices when his mother wasn't ordering him around, Armin got a hold of a slew of Barbie dolls and began acting out his violent fantasies by dismembering them and cooking their limbs on a tiny barbecue, watching with pleasure as their faces melted into a mess of black plastic. I definitely tortured the Barbies. Yeah. You know, I love torching the Barbies, but a lot of it was sort of like touch the butt and the weird like boobs in the Barbie body. Yeah, it was, I'm sorry. Now I want to say I'm sorry to those dolls. Yeah. What I did to you,

you're just trying to piss off your sister. Yeah. I don't know. No, no. I think it's a point. I was just looking at the boobies. Yeah. I mean, there's nothing there. No, no. I like setting toys on fire. Yeah, of course. But I just like setting anything on fire. Yeah. Yeah. For the boobies. Yeah, I mean, nothing there. No, no, I like setting toys on fire. Yeah, of course. But I just like setting anything on fire. Yeah. Yeah. For the boobies, I used to always like if there was like a zest commercial or something, I'd always get up to the TV and kind of look and see if I can look down and see the boobies. Oh my God. They probably thought that they had a real der spinner on their hands. Completely obsessed. Armin also made dolls out of marzipan. In addition to marzipan, penises, hearts, livers, and stomachs that he could pretend

were the real thing. I mean, this is a business. Yeah. Erotic marzipan. He'd also make arrangements out of pork and ketchup, trying his best to recreate a scene of torn flesh covered in blood. And I mean this. All right. I'm a give this creepest a fucking some credit. Yeah. He's trying. Yeah, he really is. He's trying to not be a cannibal. Actually, no, no, not kill

someone. Well, yes, he's not trying to not be a cannibal. How do you would even say that? Because technically he is practicing and he got really good at it. You hosted a cannibal dinner. I did. You know, this is very similar. There could have been a Dershpinner there. Oh my God. I didn't even fucking think about it like that. Yeah, you could have been creating an Armin.

Uh oh. That's called making content the locally sourced way. That's sustainable content. But after Armin graduated high school, he ended up volunteering for the West German military, where he fit in well, at least in a professional capacity, because he was already so used to obeying commands after years of acting as his mother's servant.

Armin became an administrative clerk in charge of ordering office supplies for the 52nd Armored Infantry Battalion. He did this for 12 years, known only as a quiet, mannered, and calm, if extremely weird, loner. But he did like the little modicum of control of other men that he got. He enjoyed that. That helped him a little bit.

Also loved showering with the guys, you know, like season around. Yeah. Yeah. So he was very like, replace all my shampoo with olive oil. Take some rosemary. Have bees of lemon. He was a, uh, but he liked, uh, he liked just horsing around with the boys. No, I mean he didn't horse around with the boys. He liked watching the other boys horse around and then he'd do the thing.

Be like, ah, it is fun. Grab ass. It's fun with some men. You know what I mean? Like, I know like, yeah, Armin. Meanwhile, they're like, yeah, come here, Gunter. Let me fucking, oh, it's so funny. Gunter look, it's so funny.

You're sucking my dick, Gunter. Go on. Let me fucking also funny. Goon. It's so funny. You're sucking my dick, Gunter That's so funny. You fuck. We're having sex Goons are looking I'm fucking in your ass. Goon. This is the craziest prank in the world, Gunter It's so funny cuz you're doing this and I'm like thinking of a legitimate question You got to the point where you're like acting out a gay porno. I think that this is what he in his mind thought was happening. Oh, okay. What do you want?

What do you want it to happen? Gunter. Yeah. Fuck you. Good to where he's watching them all. Fuck. It's Coonter. Yeah.

Legitimate question. I thought they couldn't have an army. No, they absolutely could because they were remember the Soviets East Berlin West Berlin They needed an army you're thinking of Japan. Oh, okay. Okay. Yeah Armin had no hobbies and rarely hung out with the other guys. Oh, you said he made marzipan bodies that he used to fuck Okay, so I think that he had hobbies actually baking is a hobby hobby. Yeah, very much a hobby. Well, fuck me. Well, at his request, Armin was stationed at Rotenberg so he could go home to his mother every night to take care of her until she fell asleep.

This of course earned him a considerable amount of shit from his fellow soldiers. Do you want to go out to the bar? No, I have to go home and take care of Mother. And it's the way he probably does it too, where he's like, unfortunately tonight I can't join you for your reveries. I must be with my mother. They're like, yeah, cool, great then.

Cool, just wanted to make sure. Please leave. Sorry, I gotta go and fuck Gunter. Go fuck Gunter, this is hilarious, I'm coming on you. Gunter, this is so funny, we're having sex right now. Now even though Armand by this point knew that he was gay, he still tried putting on appearances to please his mother, even though Valdroud did everything she could to make sure that Armand never made it past the first date with any woman. At Waltraud's insistence, she would chaperone dates by sitting in the back seat of the car,

silently judging girls as too bossy, too plain, or in one case, judging a woman's atrocious enunciation. But I feel like Armin would not be attracted to a woman who had atrocious pronunciation. I don't think hemin would not be attracted to a woman who had atrocious pronunciation. I don't think he was attracted to any woman. I don't think the enunciation had anything to do with it. He was gay. Maybe if some of these women spoke more articulately, maybe they could have impressed him. That's the thing is that Armin couldn't understand why any of this was weird even when others

patiently explained to him why bringing your mother on a date was strange. How could it possibly be strange? My mother's the most exciting backseat driver that's ever been. She tells me what to do. You mind if we go in the back and make out? I was talking to my mom. The furthest Armin ever got with the girl was when he was introduced to a friend

of a friend named Martina who already had three children. Poor single moms. They're fucking hard for pickings out there. Real hard. Now, as I said, just like Gein, Armin was better with kids than adults. So he got along well with Martina's children and that was promising for a single mother. But while the romance was essentially platonic Armand bragged to his co-workers that they were engaged and that they had all kinds of sex

None of which was true. What it all? Was so nice to finally see her glance How fluorescently pink her bottom is. We're slowly stretching the clitoris to make a penis. I pull and I pull and I pull and I pull. I tug and I tug and I tug and I tug. Where are the balls? It all fell apart, however, when Martina told Armin she intended to have her tubes tied

because she already had three kids and didn't want any more. That's gotta be disappointing for him. Even though Armin knew he was gay, he firmly believed that he would one day marry a woman and have children. So a woman who couldn't have children was useless to him. But when they broke up, he did confess to her, alright, alright, you got me, I'm gay. The worst part though is that this drama, this all occurred over a period of three weeks Yeah, he did not yeah

That was as close as he ever got to have in anything that was remotely normal and that woman that is just a desperate lady That's less than a month. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah that lady was like cuz she went straight almost into marriage She almost went straight to being man Mrs. Mivus Now Armin was forced to leave the military after 12 years in 1991, partly because he racked up two DWIs in quick succession and partly because it was obvious that this lone weirdo was never going to have the makings of a leader. Well, this is the truth is that this is why he, this is where we're heading into.

You could see the danger points where Dennis Nelsonelson Jeffrey Dahmer same style of avoidance of their own inner struggle. Yeah, so using alcohol to mask just Slam it down. So he was he was obviously Riddled with cannibalistic fantasies at work and he was in army and he knew that if he said anything He was not gonna be treated very well. If he said anything about any of this, even just wanting to kiss Brad. Doesn't have to owe being gay. Bo-Yo-Do, that's what I'm saying. It's bad enough just being his normal self. Never mind telling them his real self. Right? So he can't deal with it.

So his fantasies were just supercharged and getting harder to avoid and harder to avoid. So that was why he was just drinking. He was drinking himself to death. I don't know why I pictured him as sober. Yeah, no dude. A lot of these guys, especially Dennis Nilsson and Jeffrey Dahmer are perfect examples about how in order for them to face this inner paraphilia, they have to be drunk.

See that's the thing with Nilsson and Dahmer. If they're getting hammered, they would have made more mistakes and got caught earlier. They did. But they made a lot of mistakes, but it was because with Jeffrey Dahmer was because who he chose to kill. And with Dennis Nielsen, it was because it all happened inside of his apartment and no one saw anything. Yeah. And the only reason why he got caught is because he was getting rid of the bodies down his drain and a plumber found it because his pipes got clogged. Yeah. I'll fill with like slurries of meat. Cause you try to go jam the meat down his drain and a plumber found it because his pipes got clogged. Yeah, all filled with like slurries of meat because you try to jam the meat down there. Good old Mario and Luigi saving the day once again.

So after leaving the army, Armin took a computer technician course and got a job at a software firm in the town of Kassel, about 200 miles away from the farmhouse in Wustfeld. Primarily he serviced ATMs, which sounds like the dullest job in Germany. It seems fine. It's servicing ATMs. It sounds like honestly, at some point you're just like, it's one of those jobs. You could probably rip a fucking bong and do your day. I did data entry for a while. That's the fucking worst. But I still should. And I showed them when I had my data entry job, I was fucked up the

whole time. It was awesome. Yeah. But you were living in your car and drinking, what was it, scotch every night? Yeah. To go to work. But Armin actually liked his work and hoped to one day use his income to renovate the Wustfeld farmhouse so he could turn it into a technical school where executives could stay and attend week-long computer courses. This plan went nowhere, because Armand spent all of his money on broken down cars, lawnmowers, and cement mixers that he planned to refurbish and flip. He also started buying old tires, broken office chairs, various other pieces of junk that he figured

he could fix up and sell. And of course he just ended up with a yard full of shit. His life continued this way for another eight years. I mean, think about this. This is really like, I mean, it's 20 years where this guy's just sitting there staring into the middle distance and thinking about eating people and doing nothing about it. He seems lazy to me. Lazy? I would say unambitious. Unambitious. Oh, he was ambitious. Because he's buying all this shit to fix up, but it's just sitting in his front yard. Is he incompetent or is he lazy? It's a hoarder mentality. I think it's something else. When it comes down to hoarding items is that what you're doing? It's

Yeah, you don't want to look in hoarding is a good example of an avoidant way of living where you're Exteriorizing your problems your anxiety you're putting them in front of you. You're doing it on purpose You're crowding yourself in like you but you're in some ways They believe that they're insulating themselves or they're protecting themselves you know and so this is more of the shoving down I view this as a symptom of more and more his mom's getting older he's getting older he's never lived his dream you ever met if you've met a 40-plus stand-up who just started I mean we just hung out with one yeah you imagine one that's fucking a cannibal.

You know what I mean? I mean, at least he's got a new angle. Yeah. Yeah. Fly from your grave. Well, in 1999, Valtrod Mivis finally died at the age of 77. Armin himself was about 37.

He was almost 40 years old at this time. And after that, Armin was all alone in the world. His two half-brothers came to the funeral and they never saw them again. And he subsequently went half-guine for a short period of time. After making a shrine to his dead mother, Armin started dressing in her clothes then would adopt her mannerisms and personality while performing her daily chores around the house. Embarrassingly, an acquaintance once just popped by the farmhouse to say hi and check on Armin and opened the door to find him in full mother Mivis drag. Drag. Want some boys? So frightening. Glad I checked on you, but not going to stay. Seems like things are under control here.

All right. You need any pantyhose from the store? No? All right. See you in five or six years. But when he wasn't dressing as his mother, Armand would lay her clothes out on her bed as if he was expecting her to come home at any minute. The villagers in Vustafeld found Armand to be just as awkward and peculiar as a grown

man as they'd found him as a young boy, although they did know him as an extremely polite, well-presented man who always wore a disturbingly large smile. It's the teeth. Yeah, he had a big mouth. He didn't have a choice. It's all teeth, man. It's just the little eyes that are too close to each other and just a big snaggle mouth full of human chomp and I wonder if he had extra teeth.

You know, some people are born with extra teeth like Freddie Mercury. Yeah, that's right. He was born with extra teeth or just wrongly spaced out teeth. I think it was extra. Yeah, I think it was extra. I think he had something that like made him able to, there was his teeth. It was his teeth that made him where he could sing like that. That was awesome. Yeah. Wow. That's super cool. Look at that mouth. Four extra teeth at the back of his mouth. Wow. Good work, Rob. Thanks Rob. Well, I'm the one who remembered the fact he's got a computer over there. Good work, Rob. Well, I'm the one who remembered the fact. He's got a computer over there. Good work, Rob. But to try and cure his loneliness and still unwilling to accept his own sexuality,

Armand joined what's known in Germany as a marriage institute. Joined that same year as his mother's death. This is a last ditch effort to find a wife. Yeah. Now he did. Now he did meet one woman who liked him. Again, it's hard to be single. It is very hard to be single. But she refused to move into the farmhouse and Armin refused to move out. So that affair ended as quickly as it began, which also ended Armin's efforts to find a wife to replace his mother.

Cause that's really what he wanted. I don't think he wanted, it's not about the companionship. He wanted new mommy Yes, but now fully unfettered and faced with a lot more free time because he didn't have to take care of mama anymore Armand retreated fully into his cannibalism fantasies by reading every true account he could find he read a lie I love that I love that the inspirational story of the men who survived that crash in the end. He took the worst part of it.

Literally the thing that they fought to not reveal, the thing that they did not want the world to know, that was the thing that he was like, fought an opportunity. No, he said they're jerking it his heart as he can reading those passages Yeah, cuz he saw pictures of them young soccer playing men and then all he could think about is Read books about Jeffrey Dahmer, Fritz Harmon, Albert Fish and of course read everything available on the Donner party I thought Albert Fish was a pescatarian Just pass fish was a pescatarian. Just pass. Just keep going. Just keep going. Don't acknowledge this. It's also around this time that Armin seems to have started developing a sort of philosophy as it applied to his own cannibalistic urges. It's something that might even be considered a moral code.

This is why view him as like he viewed himself as a step above. For Armin, eating a woman was wrong, because women were needed if the human species were to continue. Men, however, were viewed as no different than pigs, and it also didn't hurt that men were what he was attracted to. Yeah, he wanted the man part of it. Because it truly did. The very, very bottom of him, literally, is a need for acceptance and for somebody to come and be there and

not run away like everybody else who's ever interacted with him has. And so in his mind, he starts building this real concept, which we've heard from Jeffrey Dahmer, he's not unique in this. And Dennis Nilsson. And Dennis Nilsson about how when I want to eat somebody, the reason we eat them is that then they can be with me forever and they can never leave. Yeah, I'd rather eat a woman, but I understand where he's coming from.

We are the same. Yeah. I'd have to think about it. You actually would choose a man over a woman. I'd have to think about it. I'd definitely eat a woman before a man. That weird? Yeah, oh for sure I would eat a woman before a man.

That's strange. But you know, I would, but once you put your conscience in there, you gotta eat the dude. See that's the thing is that I'm kinda, I'm kinda like him with like, yeah it's like dudes are more like pigs. Yeah, yeah, cause it doesn't matter.

Sitting in the room with two right now. Technically that's called toxic masculinity that we have been fed that men are disposable. Yeah, that's true. Is that toxic masculinity? Yes, because what it does then is cause us to act in bad ways. And in the end that hurts us because we believe that at the very end we live to provide and nothing else.

And then if we don't go to war, we should just die early and get out of the way. Or go to Woodstock 99 and cause a fucking bunch of trouble. Yes, definitely. But the most important part of Armand's philosophy was that he decided he would never eat and kill another human being unless that person absolutely wanted to be killed and eaten because he did believe that a straight up murder committed to satisfy his own urges was wrong. See funny is that I think that he never thought it was wrong, but it was his explanation. I think that he decided at some point

that if I create this rule, it feeds his sexuality. He wants it to be willing because that's what makes him horny. He's begging, the people begging to be eaten is what he wants the most because then it's they want him, they need him to eat them.

So you're looking at this as like I'm not going to go to prison loophole. He played it later as that. But we'll get to this. Could be. I do. But that's the thing. I do think that he did have some sort of moral code or he was like

murder is wrong. But the moral code made him horny. Yeah. That's what I'm saying is that the moral code made him horny. Yeah, I guess it does always come back. But isn't that another sort of toxic masculinity, thinking that everything just comes back to sexuality over and over again, that we're driven by nothing but our sexual urges

and that we're no more complicated than our than our own cocks? Thank you. I gotta go jerk off. But at the time, Armin was at a loss as to how to find such a volunteer, so he made substitutions. It's hard to bring up. Yeah. First, he started cutting pictures out of magazines of just body parts. Then he started taking photos of his own body so he could imagine butchering it to make

chops and cutlets. He then bought a video camera and filmed himself holding a knife to his own throat using ketchup and paprika as fake blood in his mock slaughter. Didn't know the red food coloring and corn syrup trick. Yeah, a little dappa green in there to make it darker. And it's so nice to do it that way or you put a little bit of dish soap in it so it's easy to clean up once you're done. That's nice.

I'm talking to two fake blood specialists here. That ruined many, many, many a bar in Brooklyn and New York City Yeah, just banned for many many venues He also this is This is very funny He took photos of his own penis sandwich between two slices of bread and put a little garnish next to it put a little parsley And again use ketchup to serve his boy. It's the thing, man. I gotta go jerk off. He loves sandwiches.

It is the problem, right? Is that the story, the more details you go into it is that like that would be an improv joke I'd make. Yeah. Yeah. But no, he's doing it. You know, it's funny. You know, when I picture him doing it, I imagine lettuce in the sandwich.

Me too. Oh yeah, buddy! But only lettuce. Like no tomato. I know, I definitely see the big cartoonish slices of white bread with the top of his withered gray German penis hanging out of the top of it with that little tuft of the nice glistening, like it's a Carl's Jr. Like shoot. Where the,. Where the tomato's wet. I just can't believe he chose normal bread instead of like a bratwurst bun.

I am now furious. I cannot believe he put it in a bun. I'm sure he did put it in a bun. I'm sure he put it in a bun at some point. And he's usually put it in a bun, he's like, I am not some kind of frankfurter salesman. I am a man. I want a gland witch.

Armin also revisited his teenage hobby of making dolls and genitals out of marzipan, all while masturbating to photos of gruesome crime scenes. All this was just- What did you do this weekend, Armin? It's just all the Boston like man like, how was your weekend? Oh, but you'd never guess! Hahahaha! Are you a fan of marzipan by any chance?

Yes, I love marzipan! How's about crime scene photos? Mmm, yeah, I like those too. I have a farmhouse that perhaps you would enjoy. Hahahaha! You fucking crazy, we had this funniest week. Me and Gunter had fucking crazy ass sex with each other. It was so hilarious when I told him I loved him and he made me cum.

I was fucking dying dude. Just fucking laughing my ass off thinking about how we're gonna get married in nine months dude. It was fucking crazy dude. So hilarious. But all this was just peanuts compared to the world that was revealed to Armin when he finally got internet access in his own home in the late 90s. If the internet ruined somebody else just as bad as Anders Breivik, it's this man.

The internet was bad in Europe, dude. It's the same internet we have. It's the same one we have. It's like a different dog. Something went wrong and by the way, there's no comparison between Anders Brevik and Armin Mivas. So they both like they both had AOL accounts. Oh yeah.

Actually no Armin had a hotmail account. Yeah. And AOL is America online. I don't know. I Al Gore brought him up before man. This is all his fucking fault, dude. I want him in front of me. Yeah, and it wasn't, and it's not like he got radical,

like cannibal radicalized on the internet. Bro, you don't need to tell me anything. Technically, this would be sort of like cannibal radicalization because he was, he thought he was alone in this. True. I feel like that is like, that's one thing that's an interesting thing here is up to this point,

besides he's reading about these famous cases, Yeah, but he's still like six people Yes, and he's like there's nobody else like me Yeah, and then it's not until now when he you know like an Epcot where it turns out now all the stuff can happen With near unlimited access to the most gruesome images and videos available albeit with what was probably a dial-up connection Armin downloaded hundreds of pictures and videos of torture porn and fake cannibal fetish content. These would be stored in hard drive folders labeled GROUSHEM meaning terror or FLESH meaning meat.

Not willing to let go of analog just yet though, Armin also kept a tape in his VCR at all times so he could record any autopsy show that happened to be on TV. In fact, HBO had an autopsy show. You can still see on Max Now that's fucking incredible. It's one of the best true crime series that are on HBO Max. I love that. It really is. I used to do this but with like Skinimax. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, he was normal behavior. We had the same skill, but for different reasons. Hey, but guess what? Same result. Well, more often though, he was able to catch bloody accident footage that was shown on the news, which used to be a lot more common than it is now. Man, I saw some shit on the

news when I was a kid. I remember when I saw that chick get murdered on the news, like the news reporter in the cemetery and the guy walks up and he just shot her a bunch. Do you remember that? That's all that live. That was wild. Do you remember the footage? Do you remember the guy that shot everybody on the train? He was a white man who shot people that he was afraid of guys that robbing him on the train. Bernie gets, yes. I remember them showing that like the pictures of that as a kid. Yeah. You grew up in New York. So yeah, you would But in searching for images of faux cannibalism on the internet, Armin soon found like minds when it came to cannibalism, even finding essays that promoted it as humane. In one essay, cannibalism was promoted as a way to fix overpopulation and paired its arguments with tips on

the best slaughter methods for humans. Ahrmann also found fantasy recipes on the internet like Panierter Jungenleber or boys liver in breadcrumbs. There was also Tennis mit Rotwein. Oh, what does that mean? Penis and red wine. Oh, I dip my penis in red wine every Friday at vintage wine and eats. But from what I'd imagine, most of these recipes were probably just pork dishes with the word human

replacing the word pork. Yes, because long pig was the term for the human. Yeah, that's term from human meat. Long pig. And we're closest, the meat wise, we're closest to pig, right? Yeah wise we're closest to pig right according to Armin Mivis it is they are like pork but harsh yeah okay but most importantly Armin found multiple cannibalism chat rooms where he adopted the name of his childhood imaginary friend Frankie also my dog's name by the way yeah always weirds me out now when I

see the Frankie in relation to fucking cannibalism but Frankie was his online handle perhaps inspired by the discovery that there were so many others like him Armin wrote a short story called De Strikjunge that's a hard word that is Strikjunge yeah that means rent boy wow. It was all about a male sex worker being willingly slaughtered for consumption, and it was not written well. Here's a bit of the dialogue. So Henry, do you want to play the sex worker or the protagonist? I will play the protagonist, because I will play Armin Mivis.

I only have you and I only want you. Let me become a part of you. Well, that isn't right. I'll eat you up then. Then slaughter me. Apart from you, nobody else is interested in me anyhow. But I love you! And that's precisely why you have to do it or otherwise I'll kill myself. I can feel an incredible feeling inside of me. It's as if our souls are connected. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa- Now, lest you think that online cannibals were a small community, it's estimated that Armin visited and participated in over 400 cannibalism websites and forums with names

like TortureNet, Gourmet, however, was cannibal cafe. Now we were able to access cannibal cafe from the internet way back machine and found that it was a forum hosted on a site called necro babes.com. See, I know people that did Gourno. I know Gourno. It's fake. Yeah, it's all film por. Snuff film porno. Yeah. From what I can tell, aside from the primitive 3D art snuff porn section, none of it was real, of course. Cannibal Cafe was the same two dozen or so guys posting

about cannibal fantasies and made up recipes, like the guy who asked if anyone had a recipe for Italian girl meat lasagna because he, loves ethnic dishes. Among the last users who posted before the site shut down were Hungry Jack, Betty Pig, Mistress Goo and I am beaver fart 666. My love that guy. My personal favorites are either Burger Man 39 or Dr. Dr. Give Me the News. Dr. Dr. Give Me the News.

I got a bad case of eating. Yeah. I was trying to think of some better names for Frankie. Here's what I came up with. I got six. Maybe you guys can help me pick the best one. Sure. Tongue Eat Cheek. Oh, cute, cute, cute, funny, cute, funny, funny. Neil Marsala. Frankie here's what I came up with I got six maybe you guys can help me pick the best one sure tongue eat cheek Oh cute cute cute funny funny funny Neil Marsala

I got cannibal runs Dick and catch a Tory Billy cheesesteak dick and catch Cacciatore is still the next one. And Brad Worst. Definitely Dick and Cacciatore. Dick and Cacciatore by the way. Yeah. By and by.

Number one. Absolutely. All right. All right. Dickandcacciatore.com. But what's interesting about this forum is that despite the content, this forum worked just like any other community on the internet works to this day Amongst the violent fantasies were posts about fucking whatever like this one

This is the title of one of the last posts on cannibal cafe I had to watch that movie Highlander again What sheer exhilarating and complete adrenaline rush to go into a battle on a one-on-one basis against all unbeatable odds What an ultimate high and none of this is code, nor does it lead to a discussion about cannibalism. It's just a post about how awesome Highlander is. It is! Yeah, and it's really short too.

It's just the whole, I swear the more and more I watch that movie, the more I love it better all the time. What a rush to be in an intensive battle scene, to be a mortal, to fight for the end prize, to fight to the very end, so that there will be only one. What an intense movie that is. Some guys have been like, yeah. Yeah. And there was a, yeah. The one to eat my balls. Yeah. The follow up is that was a great movie. I saw it in Vienna years ago as regards, Terry, sorry to tell you old cock, but I ate her last night with fava beans and a fine can't yet

Like yeah, then yeah, and then it's your lame-ass pun that's right you're that you're an idiot that I'm and I'm gonna kick your ass Oh, yeah Any other internet forum on the fucking since the beginning of the fucking internet? Yeah. After the nerds turned it over to the rest of us. That's how it went. Al Gore, you did this, and I'm going to terrorize your family. But in the end, Cannibal Cafe was for 99.9% of its clientele all about fantasy. For example, the site had a so-called livestock application one could fill out that had amongst other questions The option to choose previous sexual training like oral sex anal sex or toilet sex

What is toilet sex sex in a toilet? Yeah? Oh just that's something like a chair though. That's just a chair No, but it's I it they made it sound like it was a skill Yeah, like it was a thing that you needed it like there were... Don't look it up Rob. I just see him going to Google it. As soon as you type in toilet sex everything is going to stop. No one is going to be happy. It's better than fucking on a chair because you can just flush the cum as soon as you're done.

I feel like it would be much easier for me to convince my wife to have sex with me on a chair. Yeah well not when you don't have a chair and you just have a toilet and a bathroom. And nothing's going right for you. And you should really think about like, maybe I should invest in me. Yeah. That means you live at the dog park and you're only inside space is the goddamn porta potty. Well, this application also had livestock termination preferences like live roasting, impalement, or vivisection.

There was also one separate page called hashtag snuff sex that for some reason automatically downloaded a midi version of stairway to heaven to my computer that I did not open. Now looking further into cannibal cafe we found that the forum was run by an extraordinarily creepy looking man with a huge walrus mustache who went by the name Peroloco. Crazy Doug in Spanish. Peroloco started this forum in 1994 and called himself the one true prophet of the Holy Church of Dulcet. Dulcet, I discovered, is an internet slang term for the fetish that involves killing,

cooking, and eating other people. The closest to an origin I could find is that dulcet is an archaic word meaning sweet or pleasant which evolved into the word dulcet, which means pleasing to the ear. In other words, I have no fucking clue why he chose this word to mean cannibalism makes me horny. I think that I thought it meant to be honest cuz they I Know the only one who uses that fucking word. I know I went to go look for it and I couldn't find it There's a little part of me that wonders if it's based off a piece of media or if it's a name of something

Could be like I feel like it might be that but it's side stories LP o TL at gmail.com Please you know the difference Please tell me because I did try to look into it and I'm just never gonna I I'd never be able to get a real job or anything I got everything I've looked up just this week I went further into it than I really wanted to you still found nothing I got a lot of stuff I should have seen yeah yeah I really saw a lot of shit that I really didn't want to see this week hey but hey yeah hey it's all part of the job yeah that's how it is yeah yeah Sometimes the job chooses you. Yep.

Now, as far as what Pero Loco did outside of running the Cannibal Cafe Forum, he was an EMT prior to his involvement with the site. Does it really surprise me? Because EMTs, a lot of our listeners are EMTs. Jet black sense of humor and Cannibal Cafe. I mean, the guy's not funny, but a lot of jokes are made. And like we said about the, in the necrophilia episode, they have access to fresh bodies.

Sure. It's also funny because then in 2016, Paraloco was interviewed for this, in this thing called encounters with evil. And it's just so funny. Cause then you realize he's just a guy. Yeah. So this whole thing, it's all technically still all fantasy. And then cuts to Pero Loco. And this is literally what he sounds like. No, he's a, oh, Mivus' posts, they never stood out.

He never wrote anything particularly alarming because this is what everybody writes. You know, it's just so common. I get emails from people asking to be snuffed, murdered or cannibalized. And there's thousands, thousands of people out there. I have a mailing list close to 10,000 people that like this. Again, your Midwest turned into Irish. Hey, how's the meeting? Hey, how's the meeting? Hey, how's the meeting? Hey, how's the meeting?

Hey, how's the meeting? Hey, how's the meeting? But when Cannibal Cafe was most active, he was not an EMT, he was an employee at a fly fishing store. Okay. And that's the incredible thing about guys like Armin and guys like Paro Loco. It really is just the dude that you have a 10 second interaction with. You have no idea what's going on in that guy's head.

You never know what anybody does. No, you really don't. Interestingly, Periloco was peripherally involved in a murder that happened years before Armand Mivas made headlines and it is very close to being the same story. The only thing missing is the cannibalism hook, which is why you've probably never heard about the murder of Sharon Lepotka. In 1996, five years prior to Armin, a 35-year-old advertising copywriter named Sharon Lepotka used one of Pero Loco's forums to find someone who would torture, strangle, and kill her. By day, Sharon charged money to rewrite ad copy

at the rate of $50 per ad and helped manage several websites that distributed psychic readings. Interesting. But by night, Sharon sold her dirty panties to strangers, marketed pornography that often featured unconscious women, and spent a lot of time on necrophilia and S&M discussion forums. I'll let you know something buddy, panties don't just get soiled at night. Panies get soiled all day long and that's a woman's life. And don't you dare let's shut that down for them. Eventually Sharon Lapaka began advertising her desire to be tortured and killed by a stranger. And her posts were picked up by another computer technician. There's a lot of IT guys in this story.

A lot of IT guys in this story. A lot of IT guys. This guy was named Robert Glass, and his handles were either Toyman or Slowhand. Slowhand, isn't that Eric Clapton's nickname? Yes, Slowhand, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Oh, big surprise, and Eric Clapton fans an asshole. Well, after 900 pages of emails.

900 pages of emails. Going back and forth talking about Glass torturing and murdering Sharon, she finally met Glass at his mobile home in North Carolina. There the fantasies became reality and the torture began. But according to Glass, he never intended to kill Sharon Lepotka. Until the day he died, he insisted that her death was a sex game gone wrong. But either way, once Sharon was dead, Glass buried her three feet underground in his backyard. The only way I want a sex game to go wrong is we lose the dice inside me. I cannot imagine me playing any form of sexy game that would involve my death.

Yeah, I mean, when sex game goes wrong, you're still in trouble. You're still a bad thing. That's not a good defense. No, no, no. That's just the truth. That's what he was just trying to say was that I think it's him trying to say like it was all fantasy everything got out of control I'm not a murderer. I just love the idea of it Yeah, it's basically you're gonna that's where you go from like I am not do not charge me with first-degree murder charge me with manslaughter Which is what he was charged and charged with and convicted of after Sharon sudden disappearance Her email was thoroughly searched and her communications with Glass were found. Interestingly, this was the first-ever murder case where

police arrested a suspect based solely on email communication. Interesting. How have we never heard about this? This really is like, because Armin ran after these people walked. So this is like a, it's a literal testing of what they did. I'm actually surprised the website wasn't shut down immediately. Yeah. And I'm surprised that this story isn't well known at all. I had never heard of this story, but everyone's heard about the fucking cannibal of Rottenberg, but it's cannibal. Yeah. That's the reason why.

Cause yeah, it's got a hook. But soon after glass went down, Sharon's body was found in his backyard, pled guilty to manslaughter and died in prison from a heart attack a few years later. During the lead up to the trial, though, Peroloco, the guy who ran the Cannibal Cafe forum, he was investigated as a material witness because he knew both Sharon Lapaca and Robert Glass. He described them both as, quote, very nice people, but was unable to add anything else to the prosecution's case.

Cannibal Cafe was but one of many sites visited by Armin Mivis, and he even had his own cannibal chat room on Yahoo, which were, if I may say, the best chat rooms to ever exist on the internet. I loved Yahoo chat rooms. Oh yeah, we partied on there. Yeah, they were great. But in this room, Armin posed as a woman looking to be slaughtered. This was his bait. I am a tall, stocky, long pig, looking for a big-bodied male chef who would like to have a feast of me. Now naturally, Ermin got a lot of hits from potential candidates.

Yeah. I bet he was dressed like his mother when he wrote it. Oh, he's got to get in character. I can't be lady without my little shoes. It's from guys with names like Hell Eater, Stevo, Snuffy, Turkey. I like Turkey. Oh, Stevo was on there. But posing as a woman wasn't Armand's real game.

After reading so many posts about cannibalistic fantasy that included posts by a lot of people who had fantasies of being killed and eaten, Armin figured there had to be one special man out there who was willing to actually go through with it. So Armin managed to snag the email Anthrophages at Hotmail.com to proposition potential candidates. And this is really what it's all about guys. Alright, patience, openness, being willing to extend yourself. If you want to find love, you've got to be honest with yourself first and say, man, I just want to chew your dick off.

I want to cut your face off. I want to fucking smash your bones. I want to eat your organs. And you just got to find the right person that's like, that's the nicest thing that anybody has ever said to me. I'm writing my whole life. I can't believe it's happening. Well, Orman wrote on Cannibal Cafe that he was a German named Frankie searching for a young boy between 18 and 30 years old,

elaborating in broken English by saying, quote, Have you a normal build body and will you die? Then come to me. I butchering you and eat your horny flesh. Now, Armin took the application process seriously because if he was going to do this, he was going to do it right. He interviewed as many as 30 applicants, some of them in person, driving to various locations in Germany and the Netherlands.

He worked for this. This is all just building up the horny. God, he interviewed 30 people to be slaughtered and fucked. More than I interviewed to be producer of this podcast. It's wild. He was more careful about his cannibalism victim. He needed to be. But that's the thing is that once he he talked to them like met them talked to them

He found that none of them had any intention of actually going through with it. Yeah pussies. Yeah. Yeah so Armand would- Dicks. So Armand would politely say Auf Wiedersehen and move on to the next man. Other applicants were rejected even without an interview because they were either too old or too heavy for his tastes, so to speak. Also, he wouldn't have eaten me. Well, you said the most delicious person would be,

he was really, look, he said obviously the most delicious thing would be a child, like a child or a little boy, but he's like that was his problem, he said they can't consent. An adult can consent. That's why he said 18 to 30. So he wanted to be as young as possible

because he was pretty certain that younger meat would taste better than older meat Wouldn't be tough and stringy. Yeah, but in February of 2001 just having to take it at face value But in February of 2001 Armand saw posting on one of his cannibal sites from a user named Ktor 99 Armand saw a posting on one of his cannibal sites from a user named Kator99 saying, I offer myself up and I've let you dine on my live body, not butchery. Dining. Now the thing about Kator99 loved exclamation points. So it was like, so technically it's not butchery, dining. And he's a caterer, so he loves a party. He does. Cater99 was a man named Bernd Jorgen Brandes.

I can't say that like that. It's got to be Bernd Jorgen Brandes. Bernd Jorgen Brandes is how we're doing this. Talk about, again, we're not going to malign the dead, but he was a little weird too, huh? He was a bit strange. Yeah. Of course. I just said it seemed like he was a bit strange. Of course. I'm just saying, he seemed like he was a little weird.

Yeah, we're going to get into his story completely on the next episode. But he claimed to be 36 years old, 5'9", and 160 pounds, which was nearly ideal for Armin. Under the username Frankie, Armin began exchanging naked photos and torture fantasies with Bernd. Here is an example of their back and forth after Armand sent a photo of his teeth. I will sink them into your body and bite off your tongue. That won't be hell, but heaven on earth. This will be the biggest kick for me. I get a kick out of the idea of having another person

inside me. Great. Terrific. And so, after about a month of what could be described as a whirlwind romance had one of these men not been very specifically Suicidal Bernd agreed to travel to Armand's farmhouse on March 9th 2001 Just before he left Bernd told Armand. I'm your meat She's also really funny cuz like the topic of his emails I went to the way back machine and got their correspondence back and forth and each one of the titles are all like, please eat me! Exclamation board. Eat me! It's Thanksgiving Day. Eat me! Now I'm a little unclear on whether Armin began preparing for Baron's slaughter

after Baron agreed to meet or if Armin had the the full setup already in place But either way by the time Baron arrived Armin was ready for the slaughter They had talked about it and pre-planned he was preparing slowly, but surely as they were talking and he was showing him his Updated room as they went nice. I mean not nice, but you know like yeah It's nice cool. I mean if you're doing this all right. Let's just say yeah You're doing if you're already in this situation Right yeah, we're already in here for anything. It's it is nice. It's nice look at Mark twitchle He surprised those guys they had no idea Like he's coming there people like he that guy knows he's gonna get eat. Yeah, no he's excited about you

They're having a problem. They're working on a project together. Yeah, they're loving it I spent a lot of time. You know like fixing up the guest room today because I got guests coming over. I think it's got a lot to do with that. Of course. Yeah. You got to make sure it's nice. Make sure they're comfortable. Of course. Well, according to what Armand had read on his cannibal sites, one to 200 pounds of so-called long pig could be easily butchered by one person if he had the right setup. First, he would need considerable space. So Armin chose a large

room on the second floor of his home that had formerly been a smokehouse. Because he had nothing but rooms. Yes, he had 36 rooms. And a smokehouse in his in his house? I think that was very common for this time period because it's a farm and so a lot of times if you're gonna keep meat for a very long specific time you would smoke it to Perverse to preserve it. It's also it's Germany, which is like the sausage capital of the world. Yeah, so it's very convenient It's really convenient Armin decorated the room with meat hooks for atmosphere Constructed a meat trough to drain the blood and put a large bed frame and mattress in the center to serve as a sort of altar where Bernd would be

killed. Just in case, he also set up ropes and belts to restrain Bernd if necessary, but as we'll find out, they will not be necessary at all. The butcher's bench would be an old metal patio table, while his tools would be sharp knives and his grandmother's old axe. To give it an S&M edge, because there was definitely going to be plenty of that before the slaughter, You bet, man. You won't be soft. Yep. Oh, yeah. Armin bought a cat-o-nine tails, but made his own whip from an old umbrella and a TV cable.

That was for him. Yeah. That was for him. A wooden cage was also constructed and placed in the corner of the room to complete the livestock fantasy, and mattresses lined the walls to soundproof the room. Once Armin was done, he took photos of his slaughter room and posted them to his cannibal sites for everyone's enjoyment. And this was all done to the soundtrack of what, Rob? There's a top and here's a hook. There's a trough and here's a book we will read together, me and my friend. Now I know my name is burnt, but please eat me raw. We will find out that his penis will become in fact, bent.

Gotcha. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you.

I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you.

I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. We will find out that his penis will become in fact, burnt. Based on his cannibalism research, Armand decided that burnt would taste best if he fasted for 48 hours before arriving in Rottenberg. This Armand decided would flush Baron's system, purging stored toxins and bodily waste that would make bleeding and cleaning Baron easier.

In other words, he didn't want Baron to shit himself after he died. It's like a colonoscopy. You want to be cleaned out. They let him have water though. Yeah. Yeah. The only worry Armand had was thatnd might be too old, because Armand believed that the best meat would be produced by men no older than 30, lest the flesh be too tough and stringy like so much old cow. Armand had actually taken lessons from the local slaughterhouse to learn the best ways to butcher Bernd that would result in the most meat, and he decided that the halal slaughter

method would work best. This method involved Bernd being stabbed in the throat, then his body would be hauled up by its feet with loops of rope slung over the wooden beam of a cross Armin had set up. This was the so-called Gein configuration that took inspiration from how Ed Gein had butchered his last victim, Bernice Warden. And so, on March 9, 2001, Bernd Brandis arrived by train in the town of Kassel where Armin was waiting. They immediately recognized each other from the countless photos they'd shared, and

when they finally met, Bernd said, I am your Carter. I am your flesh. I hope you'll find me tasty. Honestly, they just start furiously making out. Oh, fuck. Yeah. Man, it was fucking crazy when I was like, it was me and my brother. Right? We were watching the baseball game and shit. Right? Having some french fries, having a fucking blast. Right? We went back to his house, man. Next thing you know, dude, we're totally fucking in the bathtub together,

watching each other's legs. Fucking funny as shit, dude. I love him. And it's there that we'll pick back up next week with Bound and Armand's fateful meeting and how that ended. Now, I mean it. This was supposed to be one, but it's so thick. Next week is we're going to wrap it up. We have a to be one, but it's so thick. Next week is a- we're gonna wrap it up

We have a huge other true crime series coming out through this one, but this is- next week's gonna get fucking gnarly Yeah, it's gonna get really gnarly because remember all of this shit was videotaped. Oh really? Oh yeah, buddy. I'll send it to you. You watched it? I saw stills. Still. Stills. Okay, yeah. The stills I can do. I could do some stills. Well, now you don't want to send it to me? That's pretty gross. You know, get me ready. That's all right. Send him over to me. As a former chef, you've got to be able to handle it. Yeah, he's a fascinating character and he's probably getting out of jail soon. Probably. Really? Oh find out. Oh yeah. Good for him. We'll get into it next episode.

Yeah, because his trial was also hilarious. Yeah, no, that's the thing is that, you know, it's the lead up to it. It's the, you know, what happened that weekend itself. What happened in the immediate aftermath of that weekend in between the time that he killed an ape baron and the time that he was arrested. That's incredible as well. Yeah, there's a bunch of shit in there that as well. That's so fucking weird. And then it's the trial itself, which is just so strange. Like we're going to be getting into like the German legal system, which is weird and scary, which

is very strange. They've got, I mean, it's, I mean, any legal system is going to be strange compared to the one that, you know, but yeah, it's, yeah, it's, there's a lot of ins and outs of this story and it's fascinating. I was so taken aback by how incredible the story was. We love this. So go to patreon.com slash last podcast on the left to see us flap our gums at you. If you want to see Henry's dance during the German Volksmusik, yeah, you can go and see that there Yeah, that's the only place in the world. You can see it. That's it And you're gonna go go to tick tock and LP on the left. I don't know what's on there

TV LB on TV slash go to twitch.tv slash LP and TV for all of your twitch LPN needs It's all going over to our YouTube channel. Go check out that so much. We've got a lot of good new content coming out. Good put's coming back. Go to lastpodcastsontheleft.com to buy tickets to see us live. We are going to be on stage in Seattle tomorrow. I can't fucking wait.

We love doing it. If you're around, we only got a couple tickets left. If you want to grab some, come show up. That'd be great. Super excited for the show. Yeah. Seattle loves us, apparently. I was talking to my cousins from there and she's like, everyone's talking about the show. And it's like, so I'm very excited.

Yeah. So much. But we've always had such a great time in Seattle. Seattle was actually the first time we played Seattle. That was the first time a fight broke out at one of our shows. Yeah. It was like one of the first times we legitimately bombed. Oh, wow. That's amazing. We've been making it up ever since. We really have. Yeah. So thank you guys.

If you want to fight, hit us up. Do it on stage. Do it on stage. But buy a ticket. If you want to fight us, you have to buy a VIP ticket to the Q&A. And that's where the fight will happen. A lot of fun. I just can't wait.

Yeah, I can't wait. And we also got shows coming up in Washington, D.C. Thanks to everybody in Chicago. We sold out Chicago. Thanks so much. And these tickets are going fast everywhere that we're playing in Brooklyn and here in Los Angeles. And we're coming to London. We're coming to Reykjavik, Iceland. And we're, of course, going to be coming to Australia in August, so make sure to get your tickets for that now before they sell out.

And I want to explicitly thank Joel, our researcher, we needed a fast turnaround on this fucking show and he jumped right in. Shaw, one of our, also been great work. I just want to say thank you to everybody who works here. But honestly, we turned the ship around for this episode very, very good. Yeah, and I want to thank one of our other researchers, Patrick Fisher, who actually has German parents and was the one who gave me the word der Spinner. Because I asked him, what is the name? What is the word for oddball in German? And he's like, yeah, der Spinner. Watch if this gets played in Germany, it has to get bleeped out each time.

You know what I mean? Like, oh my god, they said the Eschberg. We'll find out. We'll see. But thank you, Patrick. Thank you very much. We appreciate it. And he also does a great job on No Dogs in Space researching that as well.

And we recorded a couple of episodes speaking of Germany, like we're still deep in our Kraut Rock series we record a couple episodes of our Cannes series and that's gonna be coming out very soon we're very excited about that so yeah man I'm fucking knee-deep in Germany all the time now I love it it's great again yeah sure I mean she was a murderous witch but a fun one she never Hell Satan! Hell Gain! Hell Ulla! Yeah, sure! Sure! It means she was a murderous witch, but a fun one. She never killed anybody. She just stole people's money who wanted to kill somebody, and that is admirable. Technically, you're right.

That's good. Yeah, and then she gambled it all away. Yeah! As she should. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors, you can support our shows by supporting them. For more shows like the one you just listened to, go to LastPodcastNetwork.com.