Last Podcast On The Left - Episode 619: Martin Bryant Part II - The Port Arthur Massacre

Episode Date: May 9, 2025

This week the boys conclude the story of the most irritating man in history with the series of events that would lead to the deadliest massacre in modern Australian history and an attack that would change the way the country looked at gun control forever. This is the story of the Port Arthur Massacre of April 28th 1996. For Live Shows, Merch, and More Visit: www.LastPodcastOnTheLeft.comKevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Last Podcast on the Left ad-free and a whole week early. Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus.

There's no place to escape to this is the last time on the left That's when the cannibalism started God You know what? I'm sad for this whole series. what really makes me sit like what I'm kind of sad. I'm feeling sad about mm-hmm I feel sad for the guns The guns cuz they never You know like they just sit around gathering dust no purpose Can't you just wish don't you see that they just want to have a reason to be Marcus

Oh, you're talking about all the Australian guns that were rounded up? Yes, Eddie. I think they melted them down. But then they become goo. And then the ones that are little watch. There's not like a warehouse in Australia somewhere with 675,000 guns. And how about the other guns that ratted out the other guns? The self-hating guns that call the authorities on their fellow guns.

Are you kidding Alzheimer's? No. No. Hahaha. You might be because you're 41 today. I am dying. Yeah, you are technically dying. Is today the first?

Happy birthday! Yeah! I haven't told you yet. Happy birthday and this is my favorite way to celebrate it. Talking about Martin Bryan's shooting spree The last podcast on the left ladies and gentlemen, my name is Marcus Parks. I'm here with the birthday boy Henry Zabrowski Don't you just want a gun to have its purpose? There's no reason to blame the guns they They are made out of from the earth. They are natural

Has all the ingredient for the gun yeah Why are you making my gun tree illegal? Fair oh man to go back to the bullet farm. Yeah, of course the great horticulturalist Ed Larson And of course the great horticulturalist Ed Larson BABANG BANG! Hey! That's one of his ticks. It's been getting us in a lot of trouble. Yes, what are you going to do?

Still love going to the movie theater. Yep. As do we all. And we're here for Martin Bryant Part 2. Yeah, getting our laughter out now folks. Yep. This is the conclusion to our series. So when we last left Martin Bryant, he was 25 years old, and within the previous 10 months,

he'd lost the only two people in his life who had ever been able to maintain some semblance of control over his behavior. The first to go had been his older female companion, the eccentric gambling heir Helen Harvey. She'd been killed in a car accident after Martin, as a prank, had allegedly jerked the steering wheel of the car Helen had been driving into oncoming traffic, as a prank. See, it's a funny prank.

The second death was Martin's father Maurice, who died by suicide at the age of 64 shortly after Martin had received millions of dollars in inheritance because he was the sole Beneficiary in Helen Harvey's will but because of this inheritance Martin could pretty much do and buy Whatever he wanted with no one to watch over him hilarious start Really developing I owe it to you, really.

I learned it from watching you. Yeah. You know, I was looking into this. I started watching near time, right? Near-dom? Nitram. Nitram. The movie made by Snowtown, the Snowtown directors,

that's all about Martin Bryant, but I guess they couldn't get proper permission to use his life story. See, I thought it was more of they just didn't want to use his name because they didn't want to, you know, give him publicity or, you know, whatever. It's a movie about him. I know, yes.

Everyone else's name is real. Yes. Yeah. But the guy that plays Martin Bryant is awesome. Caleb Landry-Jones. Yeah. Great actor. Great actor. He's got that, he's got a naturally creepy face. Yeah. And he's really really good at it, like he's very very good

at it, but it kind of brought a lot like full circle to me. Oh yeah that guy, he was in Twin Peaks The Return. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. He's amazing. Free of billboards. He's a great actor. Yeah yeah he's great. But the Helen relationship with Martin Bryant actually kind of made even more sense because of that movie to me Yeah, like way more about like lost souls Finding each other and they both serving a purpose of Legitimately just almost like filling the time. Yeah. Yeah, they're filling the loneliness. Yeah Yeah, it's about taking away the hours. Yeah these people Well as far as Martin went the car accident with Helen had resulted in a head injury that had turned Martin's personality

From sullen and slightly withdrawn to overly chatty and that was in addition to the fact that he had become even more Aggressive than he already was as a result Martin's mother had all but given up on him She'd abandoned Martin to the farm where he'd lived with Helen prior to her death. At the farm, Martin became more isolated and resentful towards the world at large, mostly because the world had rejected the extremely antagonistic way that he approached the rest of humanity.

No one likes how I eat corn with my ass! Oh, give it a do, fuck you! You don't give a do, fuck you! You don't like my berries, fuck you! You don't like my fucking pigeons, fuck you! It's my form, go fuck! Oh, I'm sorry, I'm being aggressive. A tad. Yeah, a tad.

The fuck yous are always aggressive, Martin. I'm telling you the fuck yous are always aggressive Martin That's almost a compliment Now how many of these guys like spree shooters serial killers like head injuries pretty common probably very common Yeah, it's mostly injuries to the frontal lobe Like a Ted Bondi John Wayne Gacy a lot of times it's in childhood, sometimes it's in adulthood. But yeah, frontal lobe injuries, it kind of turns off the connection that you feel to the rest of humanity. Your brain should really be a well-made souffle of emotions, experiences, thoughts and desires but when you smack the oven a couple of times it makes a souffle turn into a runny pile of eggy custard

especially when the souffle was already fucked up to begin with it's a shit based souffle and now it's just shit custard that's the problem here yeah you can't even say like well it tastes like the shit that it's made from but at least the presentation Is nice. It can't say that and say that anymore now because of Martin's off-putting demeanor. He became extremely lonely Especially after Helen died and while he did go on dates here and there with women both older and younger than himself The initial attraction that women felt because of Martin's good looks would dry up as soon as they spent any significant amount of time with him. So Martin found a way to basically hold companions hostage when he began using his inheritance money to buy business class seats on international flights.

He never stayed in his destinations long, but the destination wasn't the point. Instead, Martin took the flights so he would have a captive audience for up to 12 hours at a time. So that's what's going on. That's what's happening to me. Yes. I'm subject to terrorism. People want to talk to me. You know when it's the worst? Truly, the Midwest businessman. Oh, God. The Midwest businessman is the single worst domestic terrorist that you can meet with.

This is the crime. Yeah, no, the Midwest businessman will sit and he'll talk and he'll talk and he'll always refer- What brings you to town? Oh yeah, business or pleasure? For me, I mix it. And he always refers to some cryptic shit that sounds illegal Impossible and very strange just let you know you ever got a problem in Peoria

You just let me know mean stubby Pete will take care of for you a lot of things Remember that straight-up murderer we met on the flight to Adelaide. Yeah Was a half-dressed doll for his daughter No, it was a flash action figure Figure of my favorite cancelled actor To bring me from America, yeah No, this man in Adelaide definitely like that's what I'm talking about with like cryptic shit He kept like referring to his connections in Adelaide as Adelaide as we all know is like the murder cap

It's like the crime capital of Australia shady shit happens in Adelaide Normally, I think it just means that I know a place where a woman will blow you Normally and you might not be super happy with the result of it, but it's done. Yeah Well following the Port Arthur Massacre countless people who have been trapped in a seat next to Martin Bryant came forward That's who that guy was. Yeah. No, I mean, that's the things that Martin Bryant was such an Irritating person that people would remember him from like decades previous like oh, yeah, I remember that fucking guy Yeah, but I'll never forget like he's a story people said that he would invade their personal space He would talk directly into their faces

And he just simply would not shut up for the entirety of the flight these so-called Conversations would be rambling stream of consciousness diatribes And if one person stopped listening Martin would Continually make the rounds bothering every person in his vicinity until the flight was over This is why you can't give hold in a race Because if he gets the diamond status can get upgraded at any time it's gonna unleash this same series of hell on any other unsuspecting young ladies that are in, but I'm also saying big old men as well. Yeah, Holden doesn't talk to young ladies He's only gonna talk. He's only gonna talk to older men. He just talks to whoever he can get at. Yeah, you know

But Martin Bryant, it's hard because I do understand there's a lot of fun stuff to talk about on the plane Oh look, I can make wind come from the top of the sky! Whee! Whee! Bing bong, bing bong, bing bong, bing bong! Hey look, that's why I'm watching a movie, it's got dick in it! It's got hope in it, I can jerk off to it if I want to! Hey, what are you doing there?

Oh Dr. Pepper? More like Mr. Pepper! Hey doctors! Hey there, how you doing? Hey you big lady! You're very big from the bottom down, aren't you? You think I can pee in my mouth? Actually son, I'm not going to do that.

I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. Hey there, how you doing? How are you big lady? You're very big from the bottom down, aren't you? You think I can pee in my mouth? Yeah.

Actually, son, yes I do. Well traveling at a pace of a new flight once every two days or so, Martin used his inheritance to take more than a dozen trips between late 1993 and the end of 1995. Basically Martin traveled to any location that took forever to get to from Australia, went to London, Bangkok, Frankfurt, Tokyo, Kuala Lumpur. Later, Martin would say that the goal of these trips was to meet quote-unquote normal people. I'm just trying to reach at the ahoy-polloy. But no part of his adventure would ever work out the way he wanted it to.

For example, after exhausting the passengers on his flight, Martin would go to restaurants and cafes at his destination and talk to random people. Those random people would mostly just get up and move away. These trips, however, were always top of the line. Martin would go to his travel agent's office dump ten thousand dollars on their desk and say Send me somewhere The agent would therefore set Martin up with business class seats expensive hotels and reservations at the finest restaurants

Happened to travel agents Expedia They're reserved for the Extraordinarily rich like you know the first season of white lotus is like I'm gonna call my travel agent It's for people like that is it really because I always kind of thought it was the opposite I've only ever seen travel agents in little cities where no one would ever even think of leaving There's always like a travel agent and there's like an Oscoda. There was a travel agent. You know where all the travel agents are?

Queens. Queens is full of travel agents. Well, it's, you know, the most culturally diverse town in the world. Exactly. Yeah. People got to go get back home. Oh yeah. But at the same time that Martin Bryant was taking these trips and forcing people

into being his temporary companions, he was also building the arsenal that would enable him to enact the Port Arthur Massacre a couple years later. It's kind of like when I sit on the plane and I slowly go through pictures of Carmy and Wendy and it's just him just going I'll miss that gun. Hey, I'll miss that when I miss this clip. It's one of my favorite clips. It's like my favorite fruit. You know, guess what? Guess what my favorite fruit is. Gunfruit? No. Passionfruit? No. Grapes? No.

Apples? No. Pears? No. Tangerine? Keep guessing. It's a banana. Oh, you're just getting me to talk to you, Icy. Hey, take a look at this gun. Don't these grenades look like tits? Yes, they do.

Thank you. Because you drew nipples on them. You're right. God, you're my best friend. Well, Martin's first gun was an AR-10. This model had just been imported to Australia for the first time in the 90s, where it was sold through gun shops and newspaper ads. These sellers hardly ever asked for gun licenses

when selling these extremely deadly weapons, which is a good thing for Martin, because he certainly did not have a gun license at any point. With stuff like assault rifles, do you think it's for fun? Like literally just because it's fun to have? Or do you think they use them for like, you know how they made the big thing about how we needed assault rifles for the feral hogs when they...

It's like 90-10. 10 yeah it's honestly 90 10 knowing many people with these types of weapons it's for fun yeah cuz most of the time you're not mowing down a bunch of civilians in Afghanistan no and and that's the thing is that when I was in high school people shot felt like teenagers hunted feral hogs with just regular ass guns and Killed a lot of them. They had no problem killing these feral dogs with just regular ass rifles But maybe the feral hogs aren't as big of pussies anymore They've organized yeah, yeah

No, they don't know it's 90 90 10 fun to like yeah, I might actually need this for something Yeah, people are just scared of their fellow man. It's true. It's also a fun way to get your mail quicker. Yeah. But by 1995, Martin finally discovered that if he wanted some sort of romantic companionship, his best course of action was to go for teenage girls who didn't know any better. Oh. Girls who might be dazzled by his looks.

And he therefore began a short relationship with a girl named Janetta. The Dane Cook Method. Well that relationship ended when Martin forced Janetta to stay out at sea during choppy conditions after dark on a boat Martin owned. The motor on the boat died, and after they were rescued by a fishing boat a few hours later Janetta broke up with Martin. Devastated, Martin sold his boat to the dark unmoving unpowered boats this is one thing a woman loves it's being trapped in a boat Devastated Martin sold his boat and used the money to buy an AR-15 the same gun that he would use to

Devastating effect at Port Arthur this gun and all the others to come were bought from a gun dealer named Terry Hill at a Store called guns and ammo where licenses were, again, optional. Now by early 1996, the year of the massacre, Martin's mother, Carleen, had finally recognized their son needed help. His moods were getting worse, and his penchant for outlandish clothes like the electric blue Austin power suits we mentioned last episode, those were only isolating him further because the public found his fashion sense To be highly amusing of course

That's why I dress like that by the way I dress like an idiot to like disarm people. Yeah, it's so much better that way I like being a character from a movie, but in real life Yeah, you just got to know that people are laughing at you and I do it for them to do that Yeah, yeah, of course can't get upset about no. No, that's the that's the thing You can't I remember when I was in, you know, I was in junior high, but I bought this felt top hat Yeah, it was like got it had a bunch of aliens on it It was green and it was black and I wore it around the mall And got really mad when people laughed at me, of course, because you're like You don't fucking get the fact. I'm out of this town

Or going to the big city and I'm gonna learn to tap Everybody's gonna pay tickets to see me or run and dance and sing but that's the it it is the reaction of a child It's the reaction of a 13 year old and you know Martin Bryan's having this Exact same reaction at 25 and of course is having homicidal thoughts while he's having that reaction That's the main difference. Yes. Remember those gutter punks we had living with us Oh, I remember and we had that one lady who would always Shoot, you know the one who had the dirty tattoo gun and couldn't get hired as a tattoo artist She was the one that said that she didn't need to pay rent because she could Just tattoo us. Yes. Yeah, we never took her up on that. I still regret that

Hepatitis C would have done wonders for your career. That is really what I needed is some that Pete Davidson extra But but Eddie remember the problem with her is that she sort of looked like you but with little angel wings on it. I know but that's the thing, I remember she was wearing those angel wings in publics and she got mad when someone said something to her. It's like, you're wearing angel wings in public. Yeah. You gotta get comments. Maybe. Well, Martin also started drinking heavily, grossly focusing on straight Bailey's Irish

cream or Sambuca. All while he listened to the same albums over and over or watch the same TV Shows or movies continuously. He's like James Gandolfini. Yeah, what is it? What did James Gandolfini? Did he just listen to the same thing over and over? Just the idea of all the Sambuca. Oh, yeah Oh the Sambuca How often do you hit the Sambuca? I'm sure a lot of Steely Dan is doing that James Gandolfini only listen to the Bee Gees like

Well primarily Martin loved the stylings of 1960s British pop icon Cliff Richard he Cliff Richard never broke through in the United States He's kind of a bland combination of Neil Diamond and Tom Jones also had some very bland soft Rockets in the 80s But Martin Bryant's favorite album was the soundtrack to the Lion King Which either proves his subnormal intelligence or proves that music taste has absolutely nothing to do with violent behavior I just bought it on vinyl. Yeah, and you're not Between this and your boys the boys you collect for the stream you know he's just always boys they're just you know they're usually they're definitely children yeah what are you gonna DJ with this shit he's gonna

listen to it at his home for pleasure yes I also bought Beauty and the Beast now that's a bit it's soundtrack for unbelievable. Yeah, you know, it's underrated little mermaid. Oh, it's next on my list Imagine getting super stone dropping the needle on under the sea. I just do it in my own head. Yeah, I Like look at this stuff You didn't karaoke for Julie's birthday Well as far as movies went Martin had a massive VHS collection of over 1300 tapes But while he did love action movies like Steven Seagal's undersea cool Jackie Shans the protector I like him now his favorite movie of all was the pig centric talking animal vehicle babe, okay

So like what am I supposed to do here? You are the speed dating like event and you both just had a list the things that you guys both love Your favorite things Yeah, this is your best friend Literally wore out the tape on my under siege Wow, I feel like you're the kind of guy that like had babe on VHS and then upgraded to DVD and then now own it on Blu-ray.

I wish! When you buried the VHS outside where you're like, that'll do VHS. That'll do. Well that same year, 1996, Martin did find a companion, despite all his talk of loneliness. See guys, that's all you gotta do.

And the way he found her I think tells you that he was far more in control of his faculties than one might expect. Now I'm sure that the paper helped him out with this, but Martin still had the wherewithal to place a personal ad. It read in a surprisingly sane tone, quote, Lady companion for scuba diving, tennis, camping, and whining and dining, for an attractive, slim, caring, 29-year-old male. Genuine replies only please. See? It sounds sane. Oh yeah, definitely. I'd fall for it.

You see, I do see him typing it in a big cartoony like typewriter while he's talking to a bird That's like kill kill kill kill kill kill is like now soon very very soon Martin got exactly one reply from a 20 year old horticultural student named Petra Wilmot. That's all you need or Petra Petra Wilmot Surprisingly she had a way with Martin just like Helen had but while she said Martin was gentle and kind with her He became irritable and aggressive anytime they were around other people. The weirdest incident in their relationship though, considering what Martin would soon do, was when he and Petra went to see Casino. According to Petra, Martin had to leave after he got queasy during the scene where De Niro, you know that scene where De Niro has the car counters fingers

crushed with the hammer Really bothered Martin. He got queezy had to leave well trigger finger You know it could also literally be that's why these guys use these guns though Yeah, cuz they're very far from the action when you're using the guns. That's true. It's a distancing effect Well as we'll see he didn didn't, but he would normally do. Normally, yeah. But even with the ups and downs, Petra moved in with Martin in 1996,

and she would still be living with him when Martin perpetrated the massacre a few months later. Now as far as why Martin did what he did, there doesn't seem to be a single event in his life that fully inspired the mass murder, a personal event. Rather, it seems like the massacre was an idea that slowly developed over time, because Martin did tell investigators after his arrest that he'd been planning on doing something like this for a couple of years.

For Martin's later testimony, though, while the idea was just sort of floating around the whole time he was buying his guns, the idea began to actually crystallize after Martin became obsessed with two true crime stories that occurred in Australia and the UK respectively in 1996. The first occurred in the early part of the year when an eight-year-old boy was kidnapped in a scheme masterminded by a career criminal named Jeffrey Peter Radloff. Directing a crew of three, including himself, Radloff told his guys to abduct the boy from his home in the middle of the night and take him to a hotel.

The henchmen, however, panicked almost immediately because they believed the police were onto them, so they dumped their abductee in the middle of the street just 18 hours after the kidnapping before the ransom had a chance to go through. See I see this as some form of this is a plot to a film that none of us will ever see. Yeah. This is literally problem-troyled for where they kidnapped the most able, evil, strong-ed, and cunning child possible. It's problem child meets home alone.

Meets Clifford. And then somehow there was a worse boy than Martin Bryan and they found him. And they had to bag him and release him. They literally were like, this is actually too hot for my blood. He'd ruin the headquarters. He flooded my grandmother's house. Where did he get a crossbow from?

The Martin was obsessed with this kidnapping case such was his fascination that when he was arrested for the massacre He recognized one of the detectives who'd worked the crime and Martin treated him like a celebrity Oh, and what was I'm sure a chilling statement to the officer? Martin told him that the kidnapping had partially inspired Martin to commit his crimes because the case had given him the idea to kidnap someone after the shooting to use as a hostage. But the incident that inspired Martin far more than the kidnapping case was a mass shooting that occurred in March of 1996 at a primary school in the Scottish

town of Dunblane. There a disgruntled 43-year-old former scoutmaster named Thomas Watt Hamilton murdered 16 children and a teacher with two 9mm pistols and two.357 revolvers, while 12 other kids and three other teachers were wounded. Like Martin Bryant, Thomas Hamilton was a local misfit, who was nicknamed Spock by the adults in Dumplain because of his otherworldly demeanor. But to the kids, Thomas Hamilton was simply known as Mr. Creepy. Well, stop the creepy, please.

I didn't go to ten years of creepy medical school. Duke University to be called Mr. Dukie University please. Thank you. Yeah the kaka college. I also see a lot of Scoutmasters killing a bunch of people and I think partially, you know why? Little scarves. You think the little scarves?

The anger brought upon by little scarves. Do you think that you're saying the little scarves cut off the air supply and it caused some sort of like hypoxia I think we press on some kind of neck nerve or something like you ever see Dennis Rader in his full Scoutmaster uniform yeah sitting there when his high knees thought yeah yeah like you could just tell that he wants to just choke a boy till he comes he's just sitting on top of that, just waiting to do it. It's interesting that so many scout leaders, because all the Cub Scouts, they're armed.

You know, they all got tiny little belly popper knives. Yeah, but you know, I feel like they like the challenge. Well, Hamilton had been obsessed with running youth clubs for boys throughout his life, ever since he'd been fired from the Scouts for extreme incompetence as a young man. He just kind of showed up and was like, so where are the tents?

I don't know. Well, you mean tents. Yeah. What a tents. Yeah. But. What's a river? But Hamilton also displayed other extremely inappropriate

behaviors like his penchant for taking photos of little boys in swim trunks and plastering the walls of his home with the prints. See, this is just me charting their experiences and mostly just seeing them grow from the littlest version of themselves to the tightest, biggest version of a boy version of themselves.

And I like to kind of see how the years change their torsos. It's completely normal. I like to see how their feet grow. I like to see the hair sprout on their pre-mubescent legs. I wouldn't have to make it myself if they just sold it to me. They won't take it. Can't there be a store for me? So after Hamilton was denied the privilege of running yet another boys club in 1995, which he blamed on rumors spread by the local police and the Boy Scouts that he was a pedo.

Those are who should be spreading those rumors, by the way. It's not like it's just from Mary down the street. The police are telling people he's a pedophile. That's an investigation. Hahahaha After that, Hamilton snapped and killed 16 children just a month and a half before Martin Bryant carried out the Port Arthur Massacre. You see, you see a pedophile killing kids like this at any other place? No, I don't think so. I don't want to fuck kids so much. I want to shoot them from far away. And I certainly don't want to suck them. Oh god, I don't want to shoot him from far away. And I certainly don't want to suck him. Oh God, I don't want to suck him. I'd be doing it, right?

I'd be doing it. Unstable. Yeah. Very good. Sounds like an unstable man. It's Mr. Creepy to you. But like Australia, Great Britain passed legislation after the Dumb Lane Massacre. They banned the private ownership of most handguns. And while there has been one mass shooting on what we'd call an American level in the

UK since Dumb Lane, that would be the Cumbria Massacre of 2010, Dumb Lane remains the worst mass shooting on record in the UK. They don't get new records year after year like we do. Get those numbers up guys. Now Thomas Hamilton perpetrated his massacre on March 13th and it seems like the attention Hamilton received directly inspired Martin Bryant to finally carry out the massacre he'd been planning over the previous two years, pretty much ever since his father died. See just a week before Port Arthur, Martin ran into an old neighbor of his grandmother at the local supermarket. Now it's hard to say how the conversation got to this point,

but this neighbor said that Martin told her that nobody ever wanted to listen to him or go with him, and he was getting fed up with it. So he was gonna do something that would make everybody remember him, or at least that's what the neighbor claimed he said. Now one can make the argument that we're giving Martin exactly what he wants by doing this

series, but that misses the whole point of why we cover these people. We don't talk about Martin Bryant solely because he killed 35 people, we talk about him because he's a fantastically weird loser, and hiding him in the shadows and treating him like a mythical monster only makes us more afraid of people like him. And meanwhile, Martin gets to be remembered ON only as a gun-toting mass murderer instead of the pathetic fucking dud that he actually was. Now, as far as why Martin Bryant chose Port Arthur as his target, the reasons seem to be twofold.

Firstly, Port Arthur was a popular tourist destination because it still had a massive British penal colony. It was one of just 11 left in Australia. The penitentiary was called the Port Arthur Historic Site. And Martin knew that if he went there on a Sunday, there would be more than enough people around both the parking lot and inside the site's cafe to maximize the body count. The second reason why Martin chose Port Arthur was because this had been the site

of what he considered to be his father's greatest humiliation. If you'll remember, Maurice Bryant had planned to buy a bed and breakfast called Seascape in Port Arthur, and had even sold Martin Bryant's childhood home to make the sale. But two people named Sally and David Martin had scooped the property up from under Maurice and Martin Bryant had convinced himself in the intervening years that Sally and David had bought seascape for the sole reason of spiting his father Bryant then extrapolated that imagined spite and used it as the reason behind the depression that led to his father's suicide In other words Martin Bryant blamed Sally and David for his father's death So he therefore decided that their deaths would be the perfect starting point

for the massacre Again, this is an entire you really could make a Horror movie about what about bob of the movie what about bob that is this entire plot? Yeah, there is a lot here that that talks up that reminds me of bob wiley Mm-hmm. I've been thinking about him a lot recently. My favorite when he goes to the mental institution and everybody loves him. And he's telling all the jokes where he goes to the guy.

I love all the jokes. Yeah. And he tells all the insane asylum. I mean, this also, I have to say, I didn't realize that this was where this all took place. I was when we went to Australia last year I literally was like Julie and I were trying to decide if we're going to go to Tasmania or Sydney afterwards and I was like oh this

fucking this president Port Arthur looks fucking cool. Wow. Like I literally wanted to go there not knowing it was the site of this fucking crazy thing. So I could see why people are drawn to it. Yeah, I have all of Martin Bryan's favorite things you were drawn to the Port Arthur You didn't even know that the massacre was there you had brought your home guns with you to Australia, so you could sleep yes You're real close real cool. I mean I used to own a assault rifle, but you barely you barely used it I did barely use it now. You're right. I only used it a handful of times at a shooting range yeah you never killed a bunch of people with it thank you Henry it's important that we make that

distinction and so on the morning of April 28th 1996 Martin left the farm for Port Arthur telling his live-in girlfriend Petra that he had something to do and wouldn't be back till the next day. Now even though Martin didn't have a driver's license, he had bought a yellow Volvo and he knew how to drive. So Martin loaded his Volvo first with handcuffs and rope for the eventual hostage or hostages, along with a hunting knife and several cans of gasoline for the eventual burning of the seascape bed and breakfast.

Then Martin loaded in a duffel bag filled with his incredibly powerful collection of guns, including his AR-15, a 308 semi-automatic rifle, and a 12 gauge shotgun. He would have brought more, but Martin was so excited about what he was about to do that he actually left his AR-10 behind behind This is where this incident is very different than a lot of the other Mass shooters that you'd cover or things that we've heard about in the past like I'll always kind of remember

You know Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold doing that pump up video They made a video where they were pumping each other up before doing it and it was like real dark and they're all like You know come for you fucks and then you have Anders Breivik Who was this militant who viewed this as his solemn way of changing society? Yeah, some some show like just a bit brooding brooding Elliot Roger, but his videos, you know, like it's very yeah, it's always like a very broody Roger but videos, you know, like it's very yeah, it's always like a very broody Martin Bryant it is I mean it is doing the whole thing. I'm win

He wouldn't man he's literally just singing the Lion King's theme So excited go not kissing his gun being like, Hey, don't sleep too hard. You can be waking up soon. All right. Tom to go having fun. Yeah. He was like, it's extreme enthusiasm. So much that he was so excited. He forgot part of his stuff. Oh my God, I've got to go. I just, you know, like when you're ready for vacation, the same thing happened to me when I asked Julie to marry me. I was so concerned that I was gonna forget the ring that I forgot my wallet and she had to pay for everything all night.

So, just like Martin Bryan. Listen, we can make comparisons all night long. I already got the cops watching me. You both have a really long hair. I did, I had beautiful hair. My hair was nicer than his. It was, yeah. But once Martin had all his tools of death and destruction loaded up

He took a few swigs of Sambuca and headed towards Port Arthur Located less than 50 kilometers south with the full intent of killing as many people as possible Now Martin was full of contradictions on the day of the massacre while he later said that he fully intended to die either by suicide or by cop that day, he still went to great lengths to establish a sort of bizarre alibi on his way to the historic site. Once he arrived in the town of Port Arthur, Martin began a small tour of the gas stations that were on the road to the site. He arrived at the first station at 10 30 a.m. and wandered around the grounds for about an hour before going inside to buy a lighter and commenting loudly about the big plans he had for surfing that afternoon.

You know me bringing my cigarettes to the ocean. That's my favorite, hanging down and smoking a butt. Alright, can I have nine lighters please? Ten minutes later Martin stopped at another gas station where he talked about the same thing. My tomato can and me are going on to the surfboard having fun with the fish and the flounder having fun. He did actually buy a can of tomato sauce. And that was it.

That's the only thing he bought. This is all I need. This is all I need to bring it out there and pour it on the coral. They love it mixed in Italian. That was it Then he finally stopped at a third station to buy coffee and $15 worth of gas again going on and on about the surfing There's a little part of me that also thinks that he was doing this cuz cuz he kind of he knows criminals make alibis Yeah, he's not Present like he is of he's deeply mentally ill like way like he's He knows criminals make alibis. Yeah. He's not present. Like, he is obviously, he's deeply mentally ill. Like, way, like, he's, but I will say he also knows a lot more than he knows.

But he knows the difference between right and wrong. He definitely. But it's like, he's so, he's such a wackadoo cartoon character at this point, that he literally is just like, I thought I was going to be a big-time criminal Oh need to set up my alibi and then just go and does it like it's a chapter in a video game Yeah, isn't he also like obsessed with Like pretending to know how to surf. Yes, he was one of the things like he always like he was such a he was a poser He always had that yellow Volvo He always had a surfboard on the rack up top, but didn't know how to surf at all.

Yeah. And he always dressed it like one of his like costumes was like a very like I guess you would call it like a version of the surfer dude, but it would be very exaggerated. And he would like talk and like the surfer dude like voice, I believe it's the name of their prime minister. That's speculated that, as you said, Martin was trying to create an alibi to get away with the shooting, even though he wasn't planning on covering his face that day, which is again a contradiction towards his previous alleged statements that he was committing this heinous act so people would remember him. Why would you create an alibi if you want to be remembered? But as we know Martin wasn't too bright. So I suppose he believed that stopping at three gas stations instead of one would only strengthen his alibi

that he was actually surfing that day instead of killing 35 people. It's also speculated that Martin Bryant may have been delaying the massacre, hoping that someone would give him a reason to not go through with it, but I don't think that was the case at all. Instead, I think that Bryant really was thinking that when he was captured, he was going to say that he was surfing all day, and if you didn't believe him, all you had to do was go ask the three gas station attendants that he loudly and aggressively talked to that morning. I wonder if there is a psychological term for that idea of sort of that empty movement.

Because I do think it's obviously not good. It's like it's not a good plan. It's magical thinking is part of it and that's a narcissistic term. Yeah. Keeping your options open maybe? I don't know. You know. No idea.

I could kind of see that like maybe I won't kill everybody today. Like maybe it's like maybe this is just a fantasy I'm gonna have. Maybe this is all a thing, and then... But as we've seen with many mass killers and serial killers, they set up all the circumstances where then, now I'm doing it to spite myself. Yeah. And also, he could just be an idiot. And that's, you know...

He's a mean idiot. He's a mean, sociopathic idiot. It's like, that's what we always kind of talk about. Dumb, mean brings a lot to the yard. If he really would have like truly like step-by-step planned this, he might not have done it. You know, he might not have been successful. If he was cogent enough to really think about how to do it, cause he's not at the,

cause I view him as, again, he's in the chaotic evil category. He as again. He's in the chaotic evil category Yes, like Anders Breivik lawful evil category almost in that way We're like Anders Breivik planned to an nth in order to copy this massacre Like he took this as a plan that he took from a moron, which is kind of now you think about it It's kind of hilarious in a way where it's like he took his perfect Terrorist plan from a babbling idiot. Yeah Now as I said Martin's main reason for choosing Port Arthur was so he could begin the massacre by killing David and Sally Martin the Owners of the seascape bed and breakfast so after Martin made his gas station tour

He drove his yellow Volvo to the end parked behind the building and knocked on the back door Sally Martin answered and actually recognized Martin from all those years before because his yellow Volvo to the inn, parked behind the building and knocked on the back door. Sally Martin answered and actually recognized Martin from all those years before because as I said, Martin Bryant was not a character you were likely to forget, even over a decade later. Sally listened to Martin ramble on and on about how he and his girlfriend needed a room for the night so she said fine, yes you can have the room, whatever. She let him up the stairs while Martin

followed carrying his duffel bag full of guns. Once in the room, Martin asked how David was, referring to Sally's husband. Sally replied that he was downstairs making breakfast, which was the beginning of the celebration of his 72nd birthday. Sally then left, so Martin pulled his AR-15 from his duffel and followed her downstairs. Sally and David Martin were naturally stunned when they were faced with the sight of a large assault rifle,

but Bryant told them that this was just a robbery, and immediately put gags in Sally and David's mouths before taking them to their bedroom, where he ordered them to lie down on their bed. Once he had them where he wanted them, Martin put a pillow over David's head first and fired, killing him instantly. Then he did the same with Sally. She, however, survived the initial shot, so Martin rolled her over and fatally put a bullet in her chest.

And with that, the Port Arthur Massacre had begun. This is also where you see he could plan, and he did know. Oh, absolutely, at every point. Yeah, yeah, no, he planned, he knew, he was nowhere near as incapacitated or disabled as some people try to make him out to be. Or he was trying to make himself out to be even later on.

Yes. Also, like, Tasmania is like a peaceful place. Oh, very much so. All of Australia is. And so I think like a lot of times like at first I'm like why didn't these people do anything? Why do they just sit there and take it? They don't understand the concept of someone might murder them.

It's not bed stye. You know like exactly. Like it doesn't happen. Heads not on a swivel. No dude. Like it is in most of America. Yeah. Because they don't need to be and they didn't know the sound of distant gunfire. No, dude. Like it is in most of America. Yeah.

Because they don't need to be. And they didn't know the sound of distant gunfire. They don't know what it sounds like. The same thing happened with Anders Bravik. It does not make you a brave culture warrior to shoot a bunch of people that don't know it's fucking coming. Like it's just, yeah, yeah, you killed a bunch of people. It's because they were already in the park sitting there.

Yeah, try it against the military. I mean, don't, don't, you know. They could give it a shot. You could give it a shot. It's because they were already in the park sitting there. Yeah, try it against the military. I mean, don't. Don't. You know, like, they could give it a shot. You could give it a shot. Now, Martin had gotten quite bloody from the double murder. So he took a shower at the BMP and changed clothes.

And for me, I don't know why that's a chilling scene. It is. But it is, you know, it's these two people are lying dead and he's taking a shower. Oh, because it's just perfunctory. Using their soap and shit yeah he went straight from just you know even though he was building it those moments but right before he shot them he was just a normal guy yeah and then once you fucking shoot two people dead it's over for you you're no longer that old guy anymore you're not just a Lion King fan

anymore not anymore well at this point Martin said he remembered the years he spent in Port Arthur as a kid where they all called him Silly Martin. In his mind it was their fault that he was alone even though he had a fucking live-in girlfriend. So all the talk about him being alone or whatever that's just fucking horseshit. Yeah I mean it's the same for all of these fucking pieces of shit. Yeah I mean Martin like most mass shooters was just mad that he wasn't able to act however he wanted whenever he wanted. Angry that the world didn't bend to his will at every turn. And furious at the fact that living in the world and being accepted by people takes actual fucking effort. It's a two-way street, which shitheads like Elliot Rodger never fucking understood.

They all think the world fucking owes them something And they're so mad when they don't get the fucking payout got Elliot Roger is such a fucking loser Imagine like being so lame that you own a Ferrari and can't get laid You know like it's so easy to do in Santa Barbara And get laid Elliot Roger was such a we did a whole thing is it ah yes the supreme Elliot Roger was such a... we did a whole thing as like, ah yes, the supreme gentry. The supreme gentry. Yah! You know, they're all, they're all fucking losers.

Because again, nobody's promised nothing in this fucking life. No. Except, like Jack Wade, he's doing very well. There's a lot of stuff that was, he's doing very well. He's a fan of the show, he's a friend of the show, you know, it's like, you know, but there are people that are more equal than others sure But you still got to deal with it. Yeah, I mean look at our knee hammer. It didn't matter how many fucking Clips he tried to bite. Yeah. All right. It was hard for a while silly army. Yeah, where are you going with this?

He had the whole genetic lottery in there and he still thought I should be able to chew on clits Yeah And try to eat these bitches Because I'm handsome and I'm rich and I'm powerful and in the end everyone's like now now he's got an apartment. Yeah Sure, he's got more than a part. He's fine. He's still like a billionaire. Yeah But no matter Martin Bryant's real motivations He left David and Sally's bodies where they had been killed and drove out to the Port Arthur Historic Site. Immediately, Bryant got into a confrontation with the toll booth attendant because Bryant didn't want to pay the $25

entry fee. But after causing a small scene, Martin forked over the cash and entered. And he's cheap. Yeah. Yeah. One of the worst. One of his worst qualities. Yeah. Besides also a hypocrite. Yeah. Worst thing you can be. Now, while it may seem like the massacre would be perpetrated by Martin stalking the grounds of the penitentiary, the majority of the mass shooting would take place at the historic site's restaurant, the Broad Arrow Cafe. Coincidentally, Martin's parents, Maurice and Carline, had actually taken lunch at the Broad Arrow with Martin and Helen Harvey way back when, so Martin was quite familiar with the establishment. So at 1.30pm, Martin Bryant

carried his duffel bag full of guns into the cafe, bought a juice and a can of fruit, and then sat down at a table outside, where he ate and ruminated on what he was about to do. But Martin couldn't help but be an irritating person one last time. He began making strange comments to the people around him, saying to no one in particular how bad the parking situation was at the site, remarking on the fact that there was, boy, there sure are a lot of wasps around today.

He met white Anglo-Saxon Protestants, not like the actual wasps, but no one around him knew that that's what he meant. They thought he meant actual wasps, and they're like, I don't see any wasps around, okay. The concept of wasps was around for like three years to the 90s like it's like one of those things I remember a lot more in the 90s hearing the term wasps. Yeah now we're run by wasps Yeah, I don't know if it's that but I just it's funny because you still America's been run by wasps since its founding

Yeah, there used to be lots of like dirty jokes. Like there was always like I remember my dirty joke books There was always like a wasp But once Martin finished his juice and fruit cup he walked back into the small busy cafe and dropped his duffel bag on Start talking about the mass shooting you're like start talking about the mass shooting you're like I keep remitting forgetting from the pyromaniac episode up yeah can I continue yes well once Martin finished his juice and fruit cup, he walked back into the small busy cafe and dropped his duffel bag on a table. Without a word, he pulled out his AR-15 and began firing, punctuating the shots with his own laughter.

Now the cafe patrons scattered, hiding behind tables and counters, because while Martin had imagined that someone would have tried to stop him immediately The people were too terrified and bewildered at the situation to do anything apart from once member of the cafe staff He threw a serving tray at Martin to try to distract him But in moments like this most people freeze Oh, yeah contrary to what we might tell ourselves when we think of what we would do if we were in the same situation Yeah, as such Martin killed his first cluster of victims at close range Pressing the barrel against the heads and necks of each person before pulling the trigger killing 12 in just the first

15 seconds of the massacre, but to show you how incredibly deadly these weapons are, while Martin fired 17 times in those first 15 seconds, the bullet fragments managed to wound a further 10 people, meaning those 17 shots had injured 22 people. So that's a total of 36 people? No, no, no, no. 22 people are injured entirely with 17 Bullets and 12 people dead yeah, well it's 22 people were Hit okay, and 12 people are either way. It's fucking insane. Yeah, sorry that I'm like concentrating on the wrong part of no

No, it's fine. No, it's at 1010 at this point 12 are dead 10 are wounded with 17 bullets if you're not up against drones and Navy Seals there's just no fucking reason for you to have this style of weapon. Yeah. So after his initial assault on the cafe Bryant moved on to the gift shop where more people were hiding under tables and behind shop displays. After killing the two women who worked there as well as a tourist, Bryant shot a woman as she tried running outside. He then returned to the cafe. There Martin callously shot a man in the butt, probably because he thought it was funny, then opened fire on a group of five crowded near a locked door,

killing three of them. The body count was now at 20, with 22 injured, but Martin wasn't yet done. After reloading and exiting the cafe, Bryant moved on to the tourist buses that were parked in front of the broad arrow, where he shot a bus driver in the back. Bryant then began taking pot shots at people from a distance, killing another tourist and wounding two more,

including the cafe's kitchen manager, who'd been trying to direct people away from the gunfire. Tragically, most people who were there that day said that they thought that because of the site's history as a penal colony, the gunfire must have been a part of some historical reenactment. So many people were unfortunately slow to move. And also, gunfire has a decidedly undramatic sound. Yeah, it's just pop pop pop. When you hear it. Like it's really, you expect a movie version, I think.

No, you expect a huge bang, a pow, like you expect what you hear in like Die Hard. But it's like... It's literally claps. Yeah. But because people were confused about what was happening, Martin had plenty of time to walk over to his yellow Volvo to change guns. After switching to his 308 semi-automatic rifle,

he returned to the tourist buses and visited each of them one by one, killing people both on board and outside as he entered and exited each bus. Finally, Bryant made his way back to his Volvo and pulled out of the parking lot. And while some say he was firing his gun as he drove off, others, who I'm more inclined to believe, said that Martin honked and waved as he almost casually pulled away. That is just, there's just something about that. That's extra, that is extra. I mean, it's again, it's like you're saying,

like it is a cart. It's it's this an incongruous Image because it is very cartoonish. Yeah, but it's a joke, but it's also extraordinarily tragic and insane and Disturbing at the same time. It's been going by Yeah, like as he leaves like you know because you know we sing and be prepared this whole time Yeah, and it's all wrong and like they're all like, they must just be, I mean, obviously there's Ford by it. Yeah. But again, Martin was nowhere near done.

As he drove towards the exit toll booth, he pulled alongside another car as that car stopped. Switching back to the AR-15, Brian ordered the people inside the other car to get out and lay on the ground. This car was being driven by a mother and her two children ages six and three. After Bryant killed the mother, the kids tried running. Bryant however, pitiless as ever, chased them into a grove of trees nearby and killed both kids by firing into their heads point-blank. Continuing again towards the toll booth, Bryant pulled up behind a gold BMW driven by a local who was taking three visiting friends to see the sights. Bryant murdered all of them one by one, then transferred most of his

guns and ammo from the Volvo to the BMW. But Martin had such an arsenal that he still had plenty of firepower left even after Leaving behind the unused shotgun and 400 rounds of ammo He spent something like a hundred and fifty grand like he was some wild amount of money, especially back then Oh, yeah in Australia money. Yeah, incredibly though He didn't stop to murder the toll booth attendant But he got into a fight with earlier. The only person he actually argued with. You know why?

It's because that guy won that fight. You know what? Actually, I messed with you. Now Martin made his way towards the seascape bed and breakfast to make his final stand, but inspired by the kidnapping story we spoke of earlier, Martin still wanted to take a hostage. So before reaching seascape, Bryant swerved into a gas station and jumped out of the stolen BMW with his AR-15 in hand. After approaching a Toyota

Corolla, he ordered the passengers, a man named Glenn Pears and a woman named Zoe Hall, outside. Glenn Pears got out voluntarily, perhaps hoping to save his companion. But after Martin pushed Glenn into the trunk of the stolen BMW, he still shot and killed Zoe Hall. And so with the hostage in his trunk, Martin drove to Seascape, firing at other cars on the road along the way. Now what happened next tells you a lot about the friendliness of Australians.

Because when Martin pulled up at Seascape with Glenn Pears in the trunk, a car full of hopeful hunters pulled in behind him because they'd seen Martin with his gun and they were hoping to join him for some rabbit hunting. Jesus, he almost made friends. He was like, this is, he's like, he literally coulda had a whole group of friends.

Martin, of course, opened fire on the car, but thankfully only injured the driver. But thankfully only injured the driver. And when another car filled with people stopped to see what the fuck was going on, Martin sprayed them with bullets as well. The second car drove off and stopped down the road, where they tried warning other drivers that there was a madman with a gun back that away. One stubborn couple however, who seemed to have reservations at the seascape b&b, ignored the warnings and drove past. We're on vacation.

I'm sorry but we're from Cleveland, we've come a long way and we're gonna go on vacation. Do you know where we're from? It's spring Maybe if they were if they were Americans, they might have been like a guy with a gun fine Let him see my gun. Yeah, but when that couple pulled into the driveway Martin shot at them as well and hit the driver That driver finally heeded the warnings and sped away. Now after dragging his hostage inside the bed and breakfast, Martin handcuffed Glenn Pears to a stairwell that was in full view of the bedroom where Martin's first victims of the day,

David and Sally Martin, were lying dead. Later Martin told his lawyer that he thought that he'd be in less trouble if he had a hostage. I suppose because he thought he could use him as a bargaining chip. Again, it sounds like a movie idea. It sounds like he had an idea from watching movies about criminals and he says criminals take hostages. That's what they do. But Martin also said in true Martin form that he mostly wanted a hostage so he'd have someone to talk to while he waited for the police to come and get him, thereby forcing one more person into being his companion in the most aggressive way possible.

People say I'm a lot. Okay, I have a lot of people call me an intense person. They say I come out with somebody with a lot of energy, but I'm gonna let you all know I let you go. Yeah. Yeah. Eventually. Eventually. When I'm done.

Yeah, yeah eventually eventually I'm done Now Bryant set the stolen BMW on fire just for fun right before the cop showed up But as soon as the authorities arrived an extended 18-hour shootout began Glenn pairs however only lasted a few hours before Martin was done with him for reasons unknown only lasted a few hours before Martin was done with him. For reasons unknown, Martin shot Pears in the head, making him the last victim of the Port Arthur Massacre. The cops, however, didn't know that Martin's hostage was dead, nor did they know how many hostages he had

or even how many shooters there were at this point. Bryant moved from room to room, firing at the cops from different windows, made it look like there was maybe three or four guys in there. So the police chose to hold their fire for fear they might accidentally kill an innocent person inside. Yeah, it's a bed and breakfast. It could be, who knows how many people are in there.

Oh yeah, he could have, he could be a full house and he's got everybody at gunpoint. But just after 7 30 a.m., after an all night standoff, Martin fired 10 shots from an upstairs window just after smoke started pouring out. Perhaps finally growing bored with the situation, Martin had intentionally set the room on fire, which was the same room where he was storing all his ammunition. His bullets therefore began exploding, and within 20 minutes the fire had spread throughout the upstairs region of the B&B. An hour later, Martin rushed out of the house unarmed and naked, having stripped his clothes

off after they'd caught fire. He knew what to do. Yeah. Yeah, he's just like, don't worry, I'll have this under control. He's like, fully burning. After falling to his knees, the police rushed Martin Bryant and handcuffed him, thus ending the deadliest mass shooting in Australian history. When police searched Martin's home, they found ammunition and guns hidden in every nook and cranny, stashed in cupboards, insideboards inside bags above the stove inside two pianos He had two pianos filled with bullets. You see that's what I can see him having the coat with tails Going like it's time for my final performance This one's called bang bang goes the troll

He had thousands of rounds for each of his guns in addition to scopes cases straps and various bandoliers to me This shows that his girlfriend and his mother were either willfully ignorant of what was going on or they were scared to death of Martin Tellingly Carly and later said that when she was watching the news at the Port Arthur massacre unfold But before Martin was captured she had a distinct feeling that when she was watching the news of the Port Arthur massacre unfold, but before Martin was captured, she had a distinct feeling that her son was responsible. Carling even called Martin's girlfriend Petra, who also said, yeah, sounds like Martin. Oh, there's a mass shooting? Yeah, that's my boyfriend.

Yeah, it's his style. Yeah, it's one of those things about him. I always kind of figure, but you know, fixer-uppers. I figured I could just put some time in. But concerning Martin in custody, he refused to talk to anyone for a full two months after the massacre. In the meantime though, police put together no less than 200 witnesses who were all ready to condemn Martin should he choose to plead not guilty. When Martin did finally talk, he was evasive and disrespectful, laughing his way through the interviews while sometimes talking in a sing-songy voice. Oh, yeah, and he did stuff like they would say, you know, you killed like this many people

like you should be, you know, like this many and he'd be like, that many, right? Wow! Oh, really, did he, didn't and then like they were They're just kind of baffled like sitting there talking them But then his lawyer developed this like well before his lawyer even came like the cops were asking him questions And he would say it's like all into that, but I don't have more Yeah Yeah, it just just doesn make, it's like not, it's a cartoon character, again.

It's so hard, I can't believe they didn't like beat the living fucking shit out of me. That's like crazy, crazy restraint. I honestly- Cause they could have done it. You know what it is, is that yes, it's horrific, it's fucking nauseating, But you also are like, he's definitely mentally handicapped.

So there's like a feeling when you're watching him do this and you're like, you know, obviously, something's gotta be done with this guy. Like, this guy is not going anywhere else but a concrete square, but he is not of sound minds. And so it is, it's kind of all over the place. What do you do with him?

He's like an innocent looking- Fucking old yeller his ass. I mean, you know, that's just, I said how they do it over there. We barely do it like that here. It's just crazy because I hate capital punishment, but it's like the world is better without this man. Yeah, of course.

Yeah, of course. Yeah, just the problem is that you just can't trust the state to make the right decision. No, I hate the state. So the state is wrong. And the state is always like wrong sometimes. So you have to be careful. Now, Martin's first lawyer quit pretty quickly on moral grounds. But it also seems like Martin Bryant was predictably an absolutely

infuriating client on many levels. Despite a bevy of witnesses and hard evidence, Martin steadfastly denied that he was the perpetrator here, claiming that he hadn't even been to Port Arthur in years. Initially, when the inspector interrogating Martin described the people who were murdered, Martin faked shock, like, oh, can't believe that happened.

Me? But he then asked how many people died altogether, obviously wanting more details about his crimes. Martin and the inspector went around in circles for hours, with Martin admitting to some crimes, but not others. And sometimes the crimes that he would admit to were in the middle of the other crimes that he would say that he had nothing to do with.

For example, he would cop to stealing the BMW and kidnapping Glenn Pears, but then he would deny that he held Glenn hostage or that he burned down the seascape B&B. Oh, he was just having fun with these people. Possibly, yeah. Yeah, I think that he liked having people to talk to. He's extending this chaotic moment for as long as humanly possible. Absolutely. That is absolutely correct. Because again, they're all paying attention. This is all he's ever wanted is have everybody look at him and ask him questions and want to know what he thinks and want to know what he does.

He doesn't want to be over. Yeah, the crimes in this town are probably like at worst shoplifting. Yeah. The inspector repeated to Martin over and over again that he was going to be charged with 35 murders and 23 attempted murders But Martin either facetiously or ignorantly kept asking the inspector how many months not how many years These crimes would get him but once Martin believed that the interviews were over I suppose thinking it was safe to say whatever he wanted Martin finally stated quote I'm sure you'll find the person who caused all of this

me Direct quote that's exactly what he said He then said that it was a pleasure talking with the inspector and he hoped that he would have Many more people to talk to. They could have like easily given him way more attempted murders. You could give him attempted murder for every person who was just in the park that day. Possibly. Yeah, but then it's like they do things different.

They every... because in America we do that. We don't do that in America. Sometimes we do depending on what... It's just everyone who was shot usually, you know, but it's like you might as well... If you're shooting a gun in a mall, anyone who's in the mall as far as I'm concerned That's attempted murder. Yeah, I agree I Think you're right

Thank you No Martin's second lawyer John Avery said that he had some sympathy for Brian upon meeting him because Martin was still bandaged from his burns And manacled to a wheelchair. That sympathy however soon evaporated because Martin was just as evasive and infuriating with his lawyer as he was with the inspector. See Martin even after making his earlier admission you'll find who did it, me, he was still maintaining his innocence, floating one easily disproved alibi after another just to see if anything would stick.

At one point, Bryant even tried claiming that he was out of the country altogether on the day of the massacre, all while his lawyer patiently explained that there were hundreds of witnesses ready to testify to the contrary. But finally, lawyer John Avery told Martin that he wouldn't represent him if Martin continued to plead innocence, and eventually Martin agreed. It still, however, took three extremely long and tedious meetings with Bryant, totaling 20 hours before he finally admitted the truth to his lawyer, his extraordinarily patient lawyer. He just knew because they were trying to save the 200 people they were going to need to

bring in as witnesses to the trial. And at first, Martin Bryant wanted the trial because he was so excited. He said this to his lawyer, I want them to pick me up. I want them to sit on the stand. I want them to point at me and tell them it's me. I I want them to sit on the stand. I want them to point at me and tell them it's me. I never want to do it. Like he wanted that pain. He wanted to feel the pain of all of it and watch them all cry and scream. Yeah. And he wanted to have the entire thing recounted to him.

Yes. Over and over again. Over and over again. Yeah. Now he knew what he was doing at every point. But even when John Avery thought he'd made a breakthrough with Martin Bryant began asking if he could plead guilty to the 35 murders But not guilty to the 23 attempted murders because it seemed like he believed that he was in more trouble for injuring people Than murdering them, but I think this is also another ploy It's not a simple trying to meet the witness being a piece of shit. We're he annoying as fuck. This is him trying to meet the witnesses. This is him being a piece of shit. This is annoying as fuck.

He wanted to meet the witnesses. That's what it's all about. Yeah, he wanted to meet the people that he shot. He wanted people to come in and say, that's the guy who shot me. Because that's the thing. He was mostly focused on how much evidence was against him. And Avery soon came to the conclusion that Bryant was angling for a trial just so he could relive the massacre in gory detail in public. In the end though, Bryant finally pled guilty, but only after he giggled in open court while

all the charges against him were read. As far as where Martin Bryant is now, he was sentenced to 35 life sentences at Rizdin Prison Complex nicknamed the Pink Palace due to its unconventional pink cement walls and open plan cage design. Oh I love an open plan. Oh wow like the oh my god again fixer uppers. Waco just like it. Well most of Martin's life is kept a secret but we do know that he's made at least six suicide attempts in the last 29 years, including hanging himself, overdosing on tranquilizers, slashing his wrists, and

swallowing a whole tube of toothpaste. Are you okay? No! It'll make you sick! It'll make you really like, my tummy, like my tummy's gonna hurt, but I don't think it'll kill you. Why not let him do it? Because's I guess it's better to leave him in dude He gets that easy. Yeah Martin also no longer has his natural athletic physique as he apparently has a ravenous appetite for ice cream He refuses to exercise and regularly barter sex with other inmates for cans of coca-cola. Oh, you finally found his purpose That's like what happened with the clock and beauty of the beast. Oh, that's so nice. He gets to have sex in jail for so long. Yeah, he loves it. This is a good spot for an ad break for Coca-Cola. Speaking of, you could get last spot 90. You don't need to suck dick for a can of coke anymore.

You can just buy it at the store. The real thing. Hey guess what, I don't suck dick, I'll take it. I'll take it in me bum. Yum yum yum in me bum. Now do it please. Coca Cola. Well according to other inmates, Bryant is obsessed with reliving his crimes, and he

desperately hoped that no one would break his quote unquote world record for most people killed in a mass shooting spree. As I said last episode, that wish was unfortunately unfulfilled as his record has been broken 10 times over since 1996. At least we got that on him. Well, it's not all America. I think Bataclan's in there. 10 times over since 1996. At least we got that on him. Well, it's not all America. I think Bataclan's in there. And obviously,

Andrews F**kface. Yeah, F**kface, yeah. Now again, the Tasmanian government has tried to keep very little, if any information about Martin Bryant from getting out. But all this has done is fuel conspiracy theories. Because as we all know, nothing fuels conspiracy theorists like a lack of information. You know who's one of the biggest ones to? It's his mother.

His mother is a part of the people that is leading the charge of he never did this, this is a smokescreen event that the, in order for them to take our guns away because the mother did that thing of course Yeah, go and hide. I guess you're already in test. She's all fucked up. Obviously. She's all fucked up She was never great. No, it's a fucking bitch. Just like you know, whatever Yeah, I mean multiple conspiracy theories have popped up over the years about Martin Bryant Allegedly being innocent mostly these theories say that Bryant was just a patsy used to pass gun regulation

Because Bryant wasn't bright enough to pull off the murder of 35 people But that is exactly the fucking point You don't need to be Hans Gruber when you've got a weapon that can fire 60 rounds a minute with the simple tug of a trigger. Never mind the fact that half of them have bump stocks where they're not getting any recoil. They're getting all this shit where it's like, it's easy. That's when we have the 14 year old who almost shot the president,

if he fucking, like literally, like it was easy for him to use it. Yeah, a gun like an AR-15 is specifically made for its ease of use. That's exactly how shooters in Buffalo, Dayton, Pittsburgh, Parkland and Uvalde were able to kill a combined 57 people using the same type of gun as Martin Bryan. And according to a congressional report, when you include all mass shootings in America that involved any sort of assault rifle, that death toll raises to 298. I'll admit, big guns are fun.

Yes! There are pictures of me out there shooting an AR-15 No need to dig up to show hypocrisy here. I fully admit. I've shot these guns. Yeah, I shot his AK-47 We had fun with it It was fun to do yes But I also don't believe that the joke you get from a firing a high-powered rifle is worth even the small Bruise you get from the kickback much less worth almost 300 deaths No, it's so much better in video games where I actually get to kill

You know like in games I get to kill and kill and kill and kill and no one does anything And then you have your life I get it out of my system You get it out in any ways and for me when I play video games I usually don't play shooters. I like to beat people to death with maces. You like swords. I love swords. I prefer a sword. Slice! Give me a slice! That's what I like. I'm using a hammer right now. I usually play Solitaire.

I like being a... My character, my war fighter Lord Narf, he is having a... he has a war hammer. That's what I use. That's nice. I like the war hammers in BG3. That's what I was thinking about Gallagher earlier with the kids brains. Yeah And all because of the war hammer you got hammer on the brain yeah hammer brain. I love hammers. Yeah No guns in America are of course on a massively different scale than what they were in Australia in 1996 so don't think that I'm pretending like all this is simple. Oh yeah. When Australia did their buyback program after Port Arthur, they confiscated 643,000 automatic and semi-automatic weapons at a cost of 350 million. By contrast, 70

million of those same types of weapons exist in America today that 643 thousand 70 million that we know about that we know about like bigger than like New York and Calif like Los Angeles population put together actually it's you put lot New York and Los Angeles population together multiply it by three and then I think you overtake the number of Automatic and semi-automatic weapons and that's the thing that is only Automatic and semi-automatic weapons that doesn't include handguns rifles doesn't include shotguns. That's only Semi-automatic and automatic weapons. Why can't the Democrats they need to harness the vote?

The gun vote yeah again guns aren't sentient nor are they people. What's the point of all of this then? Yeah, it's not Beauty and the Beast with guns. I remember 10 years ago when I was working on some project where I had to learn about this stuff. I remember the fact 10 years ago, which I imagine is not this anymore. There were 80 guns per hundred people in America, man, woman, and child. I think today actually guns outnumber people in the United States I wouldn't be surprised at all yeah I think I heard that recently I may be wrong on that but you know it's but the fact that it wouldn't surprise us and that it's believable says if it was still 88 and

if my math is correct you know if we were to do the same buyback program in America that we that Australia did back in 1996 conversion rate inflation, it would cost somewhere around $50 billion to get rid of all of them. And that's even if people are willing to do it, which they aren't. So I don't know what the solution is here if there even is one. But one thing I do know is that when we go to Australia, that feeling that I carry around as an American every time I go out in public, that I can be shot at any second by a stranger, that feeling goes away. Yep. And that's all because the people of Australia had the courage to do what needed to be done almost 30 years ago.

Not just Australia, New Zealand, Britain, we've talked about it today, it's very, it was simple back then, now it's fucking impossible. It's very very difficult to pull it back, it is deeply embedded in the American character, we are a group of people that view our individuality as the most important tenet of our society, we a part of that they believe is that should be what you just think it's funny because I think it's the same people that are angry about the people the people who exist as like trans people or they're just as angry about those people existing and this idea that the government would come and tell them what to do with their guns is

This oh, I mean ultimate sin even though they're very very excited for The same people are very excited for the government to tell large chunks of our society what to do Anyway, they would be really a pro. They love this this Thought process fascism that we're in right now like total thought control from but as soon as it's something they don't like they're willing to murder Anybody of course, I mean it all comes back to fear I mean it's like it's really not talked about enough how skittish the American people are and how very fearful The American public is if you buy a gun like that. You're obviously a scaredy pants You're very you know that you can't fight and you like you can't like protect yourself on a basic level

Well, it's not just that It's also an extreme paranoia. It's the idea that they're stuck in some sort of action movie where, you know, there's it's all going to come to them. It's all going to come to them. And they're going to be at the, they're going to defend their home, you know, from some sort of, you know, invader or attacker, or they think it's going to be like fucking red dawn one day, you know, where it'd be a bet. The army of trans people are going to come to take their kids away and force them to go to drag shows and they can use

a fucking AR-15 to fight them all off, when in reality, most of these people just end up shooting their wives in the fucking head by accident. And the same group of people voted for the same evangelical branch of the government that is currently opening up the doors. They are part of the evangelical rundown of the of the world involves China and Russia invading American soil. So that is a part of what and they have been opening back doors to get them to come here because that's going to bring their precious Jesus Christ back. And that's the whole thing is that they all of this is

death and destruction. And then also guess what guys, your guns are not going to do anything when you're fucking sniped by a 19 year old from Quantico It's shooting you from the fucking at the lower bands of the atmosphere. You're fucked It doesn't matter if they want to do it. We're fucked. I that I that argument actually I don't go I Can fight against because America couldn't take down Vietnam But that's what I mean is that like guerrilla warfare and asymmetrical warfare is extraordinarily difficult to defend against.

So if there was some sort of like second civil war in America and we had guerrilla fighting, it would be extraordinarily ugly, it would go on forever and it would be incredibly deadly. But that's what they want, because it gives them purpose because most of them are living around addicted to various opioids with no way of getting out of wherever they're at.

Also as someone who doesn't want these guns in society, myself I'm talking about, no one's coming to take your fucking guns. They're not coming guys. It's not happening. It didn't happen with Obama. It's not happening now. It's not even an option. It's not happening now. No. Yeah, it's not coming guys. It's not happening. They're like it's not it didn't happen with Obama. It's not happening now. No, yeah, it's not an option. We're not gonna sit there and tell cops

They gotta go door to door and take guns cuz that would be a fucking disaster Yeah, and also the cops don't want to give up their guns either. Yeah, I think that again the most important lesson here Is that every gun is precious? Uh-huh, and we have to remember It's a circle I was talking to Marcus about this the other day I think like the only like rational loose plan to get rid of guns in America that I can come up with over years It's not a bad plan is no new assault rifles starting whenever start no new assault rifles and then when you die You can't will your gun to someone else

So when you die you have that gun has to be turned in and taken down and then that which will never happen Would take over a hundred years, but did no one again has asked the gun what it wants And I think that's also get the biggest problem here is again. We're forgetting one marginalized group So you believe that gun rights means rights for the gun yes, what else would they be for because I'm an animist Yeah, I see That everything has every object has a soul Yeah, how's my water bottle my metal water bottle soul? It's struggling with transitioning. Ah What if guns went to war with corporations

Actually, they're both if they're both people Well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well,

well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, Stick around every Tuesday at 6 p.m. PST 9 p.m. ESD for last stream on the left We air it live and when you watch it on patreon you get to see shit that does not make it to YouTube and you get to talk with us on the chat follow us on all the socials at tik-tok and Instagram at LP on the

Left and come see us on tour go to last podcast on the left commcom click on shows and you're going to see all of the dates such as Atlanta, June 28th, Salt Lake City, July 12th, Charlotte, North Carolina, August 8th, Durham, North Carolina, August 9th, St. Paul, Minnesota, September 20th, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, October 11th, Oakland, California, October 25th, Cleveland, Ohio, November 29th, and Portland, Oregon, December 12th and 13th. I forgot we were going to Milwaukee. We are. I love Milwaukee.

That would be fun. Yeah. We can get some spotted cows. That's all I want. And check the Foreign Report. They have their own YouTube channel. Now go over and check out the foreign report a reasonable take on Unreasonable politics. Yeah, and actually I was on an episode of foreign report a few weeks ago

And had a ton of fun that was like during signal gate, you know a million things have happened since then Yeah, but I'm gonna be a guest on foreign report here in about two weeks a week or two So keep an eye on the foreigner for YouTube page for when I reappear I'm gonna be talking on me. I'm beyond that show as a fair regular. Hell. Yeah in the future Yeah, I just did a episode of page 7 had a fucking great time with MJ and Jackie. Yeah, it's great to do Yeah, yeah, I was over on page 7 as well Yeah I was also on page 7 check out all of our stuff go and go to last podcast left that come get all that go to The LP on the left for all the socials and Henry

For your birthday. Did you see what happened? Somebody mentioned our podcast to Jillian Anderson. I saw really yes like on like is it on camera? Yeah on camera Oh, yeah, I shared it. I had to share. Yeah, someone someone mentioned last podcast on the left to Jillian and it's congratulations Congratulations slowly, but surely we're getting I'm getting in there Oh, yeah getting her Wow. I just now is all the thing I have to do now is approach or what? Second thing is to arrive as an illiterate Nazi youth So that she can sexually educate me to read Like that movie the reader she reader that was Kate Winslet

Thank God you stopped me