Last Podcast On The Left - Episode 646: Ronald Gene Simmons Part II - To Kill A Bunch of Mockingbirds

Episode Date: December 12, 2025

This week, the boys conclude the tale of Ronald Gene Simmons, the grouchy, incestuous, ex-military drifter who decided Christmas was cancelled in 1987. After decades of paranoia, control, and delusion, Simmons saw the season’s first hints of cheer as the perfect excuse for a meticulously planned, full-scale annihilation of his family tree. What follows is a grim spiral into the life of a man who approached murder with the precision of a holiday checklist, leaving a trail of horror that turned a quiet Arkansas winter into a nightmare no one could escape. For Live Shows, Merch, and More Visit: www.LastPodcastOnTheLeft.comKevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Last Podcast on the Left ad-free, plus get Friday episodes a whole week early. Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus.  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

There's no place to escape to. This is the last hot task. On the left. That's when the cannibalism started. What was that? It's exactly what you think it would be. Yeah. Super macho guy.

Lovey, lovey, lovey, lovey, he's wearing some panties. Really loves it. They really love it. Love it. To the point where you're Kill to cover it. It's about the panties. It's about feeling like a

pretty lady. Yeah, feeling sexy. And you don't understand. Like, dude, you could fucking just pop on some panties. You don't kill anybody, man. Yeah. I know he's a military man.

He's like that. Ask your father. You know what I mean? What he, how'd he feel? Father's not a military man? Her father kind of acts like one. Ha!

Have your father found out? Like, if you were, found out your dad wore panties, like hardcore panties and stuff like that. I'm just be happy for him. Yeah, why not? We'd be fine with it, right? Of course. I would be fine with, yeah, anything as long as it was consenting and legal.

That's the kind of stuff my mom you was hit me with towards the end, where she was like, sometimes I wonder if your father was gay. But then my question is, to what end? Yeah. Uh-huh. For what? What do you mean for? Well, being gay isn't for anything. But I'm just saying, then like, but now we're just talking about why you

think gay people have a, do you believe in the gay agenda? I mean, yeah, I believe in the idea of antiquing. They have an agenda quite often for seeking, you know, classic fashion combinations. I personally love the gay agenda. Yeah, no, it's great. I serve the gay agenda. Yeah, no, we're theater kids. Oh, very deep. Yeah, we're in entertainment. Of course, we serve the gay agenda.

Well, it's just the idea of, like, you know, like, now that he's in the hospice bed and we're all banning him back and forth by whether or not he's gay or not. I don't think it matters, but it's like, have you found your hard for father. Did you think he heard you? I don't know. Yeah, maybe. Can't say nothing. Now, do you think that you're dead, though, but if he was all like, because he's a big strong man, but you'd just let him go. Of course.

Yeah, I'd let anybody know that I love Go. If they wanted to fly, yeah, fly, brother. Would you buy him underwear? Yes. If he asked me to, if he was embarrassed. He never would. No, he never would. But if he asked me to, I would.

Yeah. Would you? For your father? No, I know you went for my father. See, what would end up happening is, if I was buying it for my dad, I would just be like, okay, I've got to try it on because we've got the same body shape until you start trying it on

you're like, this is very nice. You ever been to a rod? There's amazing thing going on. It's amazing thing. Pannies for Dad is called Rodney's Adventure. It's different than

Victoria's secret because Victoria keeps it keeps it quiet. Yeah. Rodney though. Out loud. Oh yeah. He's like,

plenty of room for your balls. Yeah, these panties, they have a penis hole. Yeah. Welcome to last podcast on the last. Ladies and Gentlemen, my name is Marcus Barks. I'm putting an end of the charade right now.

With me is... Sharas the guy who works at the panties work for them. With me is the panty curious, Henry Zabrowski. I am panty curious because it's so nice and it seems that if it fit in under my gut, my panties wouldn't

fall down as much inside of my underwear, inside my pants, like I've been saying, but also the problem is it does push it down because I have a little butt, so I'm smoohing up. I'm eating the back of the panties with my butt and my balls are pushing down the front. I know we've talked about this a lot lately, but have you thought about a thong? Yeah, the thong would be perfect. I feel like a thong would totally work for you. It really would. Do I really need to see how much left over shit is in my butt at all times?

Yeah, cheese string. That's what that is for. Yeah, P string. Oh, I was getting to the Colonel Russell Williams. I was watching his interrogation. That's why I was asking Marcus about his father wearing panties. Oh, okay. And we have the man with all the questions and all the answers. It's Ed Larson. Yeah. My dad could have been worn panties, but by the end, certainly wasn't wearing socks.

Yeah. No panty hose for him. Because he didn't have feet. He lost his feet from diabetes. Both of them. Knee highs would have been a waste on him. It just would have been two puddles on the floor. But, you know, when he died, I was taller than him. That's good. It's good that you had that to hold on to. Today, we are

concluding our series on Ronald Jean Simmons with the Christmas Massacre. Ronnie Jean! He's a bit of a bad daddy. So when we last left Ronald Gene Simmons, the most prolific family annihilator in American history. His wife, Becky,

had just given birth to their seventh child, because if there's one requirement for being the number one family annihilator, it's having a big family. Because if it's not big enough to set records, it's like not having a family at all. Indeed. Now, being the number one family annihilator of all time. Does

this make him the worst father of all time? You know because that is, I feel like that's interesting. I'm still saying Yosea Fritzel is still up there. Yeah. Yeah. And I also noticed I said the biggest American family annihilator of all the time. Yeah, yeah. There's

others around the world. And of course we can never know the full extent because I'm sure there were plenty of people back in the, you know, 1600s, they were killing entire families all over this globe. You know how many times there was probably whole stories we've never heard of where one family went over to the home

of another family covered that house in gasoline and set everybody in that house on fire. Yeah. Like that's probably happened at least a dozen times. I was going to say a dozen. Yeah. And we wouldn't even know. Yeah. I mean, we covered when we did the Hatfields and the McCoys, you're like, that that's exactly what happened. Yeah.

But they annihilated a different family, so that makes them good fathers. Protective fathers. Yeah, they're generals. Well, Ronnie Jean had attached his self-worth and his manhood to the size of his family. In that same vein, Simmons had also attached his self-worth to how much control he could exert over his family,

which, combined with his own pedophilic tendencies, had resulted in an extended sexual relationship with his eldest daughter. But after the birth of the seventh Simmons' child, doctors had told Becky Simmons that she would definitely die if she had another. So Becky stood up to Ronnie Jean for possibly the first time in their marriage, and Simmons ended up giving in on his wife's design. to have her tubes tied. Honestly, I just got her stop

because the doctor said I'm going to have to get a footstool to hovered up my intestine. At this point, I'm just a sheet. This whole time, just a sheet. I'm a leg. I'm a legs in a sheet. Well, this paired with an incident that resulted in Ronnie Jean's eldest son,

leaving home as soon as he was able, this was the first crack in Ronnie Jean's carefully constructed and controlled personal world, in which his family were near slaves to his personal needs and desires. See, outside of a need for control, what defines Simmons more than anything

is a sense of entitlement. Ronnie felt entitled to everything that America had to offer a white man in 1987. He wanted respect from his peers, a solid career, a plot of land, and a family that did what they were told no matter what. Cigrants. Yeah.

And cigarettes. But when Ronnie Jean's family, started bucking his authority in the late 70s, which coincided with the end of his 20-year career in the military. It was the beginning of a series of events that would lead Simmons to the perpetration of 14 murders during the Christmas holidays of 1987. Taking the holidays back for the fathers. Father's got to do everything all here for these fucking pesky children. Oh, won't Santa come? Oh, won't you pay the mortgage? So if he found worth

in the size of his family when he actually died, he was worthless. Indeed. Exactly. Yeah, indeed. Because you can't take it with you. Yeah. And he is kind of different from a lot of family annihilators

that we've covered and just a lot of the most famous family annihilators. Like, you know, John List, for example, killed his entire family because he was about to lose everything and he didn't want the family to suffer the embarrassment of being poor. Yes.

Which happens a lot. Then we have like the ladies that murder their children when I got the two, I believe, Andrew Yates. She was more of a religious fanatic, right? That was like a... Mentally ill. That was like a breakdown, but a lot of family...

And also, Chris What's his name? Chris Watts. Chris Watts killed his family so he didn't have to deal with him anymore. Okay. It's a sign of... That would have been my dad. Yeah. They just wouldn't take.

You know, the issue is, it really is that. It's about this idea of... It's a flatness of affect. So they believe that they're saving you from embarrassment. A lot of times family annihilators also will just kill everybody in the immediate family. The reason why this is particularly interesting, particularly interesting, is because of the days it took to do it and the way he killed his entire family. Most of these guys should stop with their kids.

Yeah. Or it's like one moment that they just lose their mind and then they regret it. You know, this was... Sometimes. Yeah, this was very much planned out and it all comes down to entitlement in him not getting the life that he felt that he was owed. Also? The life that he felt he deserved just for being a white man in America. And because last year nobody gave me what I asked for, which was an Oscar Meyer weeny whistle.

I asked for fidget slap bracelets, and none of you will hear me or see me. I wanted to ride the weeniemobile like it was an A-Bob. Can't do anything. No one listened. Now back in 1979, where we last left this story, Ronald Jean Simmons was nearing the end of his career in the Air Force, Since he was such a difficult man, he'd basically been shoved into a nearly shuttered Air Force base outside Alamagordo, New Mexico, so he could serve out his last years without bothering too many people. Simmons, however, had bought himself and his family a plot of land in New Mexico. There, Simmons lived with his wife and six of his kids, who worked the land tirelessly and pointlessly, day and night under Ronnie Jean's exacting and often incorrect direction.

Go count the rocks. Go and count the rice It's what to do It gives them something to do Where's corn The band or the vegetable Honestly I'm going Where are they

Where are they Bakersfield God They never come here They never come to Albert Gertie So he's officially become Jesse Ventura

Huh? Yeah I don't know why you got there The family dynamic, though, was still just as fucked up as ever, and it was about to get worse. See, after Ronnie Jean's wife, Becky, decided that she would not risk her life to give her husband an eighth child, Simmons lost all sexual interest in his marital relationship. Instead, Simmons believed that he needed a young, obedient wife who would bear him enough children to staff his dream farm in Arkansas. If you'll remember, Simmons had idealized a chunk of his child. childhood that had been spent in the Ozarks, and he believed that he could only achieve true happiness by returning to that area of the world.

But instead of divorcing Becky and finding someone outside of his own family line for the Arkansas farm... Yes. Talk about a snooze fest. What am I going to make a hinge account now? You want me to go out there, try to ask icebreaker questions, stuff like have you ever fucked your daughter? been a good father to fuck your daughter right i speed date inside my own family boom boom boom runny jean's entitlement led him to believe that his eldest daughter sheila would nicely fill the new wife role so an incestuous relationship began in 1980 when sheila was around 16 years old to show the rest of the kids that sheila was more important

simmons began picking her up from school personally every day while the rest of the children were left to wait for the bus. Plenty of room in the car, but they ain't coming. Simmons also began following Sheila everywhere with a Polaroid so he could take as many sexually suggestive pictures as he wanted. God, Polaroid cameras, man. No, we've talked about it plenty. Many, many. They have captured many, so many crimes. So much child pornography. Really? Oh, because you don't have to take it in. Yeah, you don't have to take it in. No, like Jeffrey Dahmer, like he was a big Polaroid guy. Oh, yeah. I personally like Polaroids, and I think they should be a sponsor. You see, they're a wonderful way to keep a memory.

They are wonderful. I do love them as well. Yeah, I mean, it's wonderful. I have one, you know, one Polaroid, I love to see what a wonderful patino of the old times, you know, me, my uncle, you know, it's nice to see. But then it is nice to have just a collection of my corpses staring at me in the shed just because then I'm like, I have them still. Well, after Rodney Jean and his daughter began actually having sex, Ronnie Jean did not hide the relationship with his daughter for. the rest of his kids or from his wife. He even gave Sheila pet names, like ladybug and little princess.

This is my daughter I fuck. I'm sorry. I should be that. It's my wife. By March of 1981, Sheila was pregnant with her father's child. So Ronnie Jean decided to tell his wife, Becky, about the pregnancy on the night of Sheila's senior prom. Which Sheila only attended at her father's insistence. You're going to the prom!

You're going to the prom, and I'm watching through the window. Becky was, of course, stunned at the news that her husband had impregnated her daughter. But Simmons had such control over his family at this point in time that all he had to do to get his wife to go along with the birth of an incest baby, at least at first, was to tell her to shut up and get with the program. You know, I didn't think about it that way until you said, that. Oh, I should shut up. I didn't think about that. Oh, wow, that's right. I'm just a slippery slide for your semen production. As I said earlier, Ronnie Jean's eldest child,

Gene Jr., had already left home and broken free from his father's grasp by the time all this happened. And since Gene Jr. was outside the sphere of influence, Becky told him about the incest baby within a month. So Gene Jr. called the local social services to leave an anonymous tip reporting the crime. Social workers, therefore, showed up at the Simmons home in New Mexico to interview Sheila, who quickly admitted to having a forced sexual relationship with her father. Do they call this group of workers, like, the EU squad? They think they're the specific, like, ew squad, like for specifically icky things? It's called CPS. Oh, no. Yeah. There's some of our, but there's some of our most

thankless government workers out there. And, you know, they get good on you for all the CPS workers out there. I'd be like, go send some yucksters out there. Yeah. That's what we need. Some guys who can really take it. We gotta get some real yeah. You don't want the word yuck in there though. Yeah. Oh, no, you mean like, you don't mean like yuckers. Oh, the yuckers. No, not laughing. Yeah, I mean like

lech. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. The yuckster squad. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Thank you. Those are yikers. Yeah. Oh, sure. Thank you. That's pronunciation. The creepy crawlies. I get out. But since this was the early 80s and Ronald Jean Simmons was incredibly arrogant, it seems like he felt as if he

could talk his way out of this pickle because he continually denied to the social workers that there was anything abnormal about himself or his family. But when the social worker filed charges for incest and the case hit the local news, Simmons started getting nervous. The trigger to actually leave, however, came when the former mayor of Alamogordo was sentenced to 60 years in prison for child sex abuse, which showed Ronnie Jean that a white man could indeed go down in America for doing exactly what he had done. This is why I love Arkansas. Yeah.

They built an entire state. You truly devoted to the ideals of this country. If you're a father and you made a child, just reprint it. That's what I say. Man, double down. That's what that is. It's actually hard to, actually had Joel try to find, like, you know, is Arkansas the incest capital of America?

It's top 10. Okay. It is surprisingly hard to find incest statistics, though. Yeah, it's like they hide it and don't want to talk about it. Yeah. But I will say, though, is that, you know, they talk about how, you know, like, well, you know, it's illegal to marry your cousin in certain states. I think you need to look at states where it's illegal to marry your cousin because that means it was happening so often they had to pass a law. Whoa.

Yeah. Interesting. Great. Yeah. It is illegal to marry your first cousin in Arkansas. However, it is legal to have sex with them and to live with them. Oh, wow. Yeah. So put that in your pocket.

No, no, that's safe. I know we just passed Thanksgiving, but you can save that one for Christmas. Oh, yeah. No, that's a, that's a Hanukkah story. And we know how much Hanukkah's celebrated in Arkansas. Yeah, oh, yeah. You know, there's some real secret ones. Live from your grave. And so, after Sheila gave birth to her father's child in July of 1981,

Ronald Jean Simmons somehow got alone. That tells you that the, that's the first. insane thing about this is like in 1981 is it this guy who has been on the local news for having an incestuous relationship with his daughter can still walk into a bang like I'll give you $14,000

dollars no problem you know what if you just figured there in the end they're like we got to support our community because if he as soon as he falls we're all going boys but there's no internet the guy probably had no idea that he was a kid fucker yeah very possible very possible but after getting alone

Ronnie Jean packed up his entire family into a U-Haul and escaped New Mexico just before the sheriff arrived at his property with a warrant for his arrest. This, of course, effectively ended Ronnie Jean's career in the Air Force. Unbelievable. He put the force in Air Force. But in the midst of the escape, Ronnie Jean had finally decided to take his first shot at his dream. Their ultimate destination was the small town of Ward, Arkansas, which was just 80 miles from Ronnie Jean's dream town of Hector in the Ozarks. But rather than being the place

where Ronald Jean Simmons finally found contentment, Ward, Arkansas would instead be the site of both Ronnie Jean's Christmas time family annihilation and the spree shooting within the town itself

that followed soon after. Oh, he must have got a good mortgage interest rate. Yeah, he did, actually. Yeah, yeah, he did. Yeah, he took a lien against his property in New Mexico and was able to get a good amount of money

to start a new, start a new incestuous life in Arkansas. That's smart incest, real estate, the context. And this is before they, like, had, like, the national database of crimes, right? Exactly. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, he easily escaped the incest warrant.

And the warrant wasn't filed with the FBI. States didn't share information back then. So as long as he stayed out of New Mexico, basically in the clear. But even though Ronnie Jean had escaped justice. Yeah, now he can fuck his daughter anywhere where he wants. No, Henry. We know. That was what I asked.

It was much nicer way. And you get a fucker in all the way. fucking any place. West Virginia is West Virginia? We know! I think West Virginia is number one. I think it might be.

It's destination. It's all the moonshide. But even though Ronnie... They call it the Mountain Dew. It's a destination for fun. But even though Ronnie Jean had escaped justice, he was still terribly paranoid when he arrived with his wife and six kids in Arkansas.

His family was ordered to keep all the lights off in the house and never answer the phone. And the children weren't. allowed to go anywhere outside of the house by themselves. Sheila, however, started to rest herself free from her father's control after they established themselves in the South. She attended a business school in Little Rock, and when she finally started making friends, she began seeing just how grotesque the relationship with their father really was.

It's so hard to share stuff with your friends when you're like, you know, when your daddy spits in your mouth in order to make you a chocolate fountain? And they were like, what? You're not supposed to be doing that. You and your daddy don't share toothbrush on top and bottom? No, no, just the top. Oh, yeah, you don't. Oh, that's weird.

That's weird. You've never fathered a child with your father. Mothered a child. Yeah. Who are you? I was both. I was wearing the pants. You're a man, aren't you? Oh, you got me.

Where's Sheila? I'm just a colonel in the Canadian Army. And I've been wanting to wear panties in a career-like fashion for a long time. It's the worst version of Ladybugs. Featuring Colonel Russell Williams. Lady Bugs is a great idea. And Rodney Dangerfield. But even though Sheila was making friends, the sexual relationship had nevertheless continued.

So Sheila became pregnant again in late 1981. But Gene, perhaps wanting to avoid any more undue attention, forced her to get an abortion, which ended up being a turning point for Sheila. After the abortion, she began confiding in a new friend, Dennis McNulty, about the incest. And eventually, she found the strength to completely reject her father, despite his continual attempts, to shame her into having sex with him. This, of course, was another blow to Ronnie Jean's fragile ego, which was made all the more powerful because Arkansas was supposed to be where Simmons was finally going to get everything he thought he deserved. I also wonder why he thought that, like, you could shame your daughter and I haven't seen. sex with you. I don't feel like in that way

you might need to like briber or something. I feel like if you're doing anything like, Daddy's hard. Can you see how hard your father is? It's such a bad pitch. Yeah. It's like trying to make her feel bad for it. Look how hard your father is. What's you going to do with it? What's your father

going to do with you? You can leave him out here in the cold? It's also like he's not wronged by anybody, it seems like, at this point. No, he's never wronged by anybody. It's all about what he believes he deserves. Yeah, he's a piece of shit. Yeah.

Yeah, everything bad that happened in his life was his fault. He's a bad man. Did bad things. Now, within a couple of years, Ronnie Jean found a 13-acre plot of land outside of town that he eventually named Mockingbird Hill. Oh, and that's so nice.

Isn't it? After purchasing the land, Simmons crammed his wife and five remaining kids into the double-wide mobile home that had already been plopped down on the property. Now, naturally, Mockingbird Hill was an absolute hellhole of an existence. Ronald Gene quickly turned it into a white trash

cliche, filling it with junked out cars, electrical fixtures, barbed wire and various other pieces of junk that Simmons would force his children to use for his hairbrain projects that never quite worked out, because his labor force was entirely children. The double white also had no plumbing, so

Ronnie Jean had his kids build outhouses out of scrap and dig massive privy pits to hold all the waste that two adults and five kids create. Within just a few years, though, those privy pets would become a terribly odorous mass grave for the Simmons family. Oh, there was a book about it, right? To kill a bunch of mockingbirds? I thought that was the fight against wind energy. Now, even though Ronnie Jean seemed to be making headway towards his dream of a family farm in Arkansas, the indignities

of his own reality, or at least the indignities he perceived, kept hitting him square in the face. Sheila began dating her friend Dennis McNulty, and despite Ronnie Jean's best attempts to sabotage the relationship, he'll never love you like I do, he'll never love your incest daughter, Sheila and Dennis got serious. Additionally, the only jobs Ronnie Jean could get in Arkansas were low-skilled labor. His first job was working as an industrial cleaner, fish and pickles out of vats of brine at the local pickle factory for five bucks an hour. You would love this job. I love that job.

It's a good job. I don't know, but that's the thing. They say that if you love your job, you never work a day in your life, but you also don't want to overdo your passions. You don't want to get too close to the brine professionally. Yeah, sometimes I'll go months without eating a pickle just so I can get the pickle flavor back up and I can get the desire back up, you know? It's sort of like edging, but for pickles.

If you have your manager breathing down your fucking neck about Dill production, you're going to be really fucking pissed. You're going to be like, first of all, Money and pickles never should have been a thing. No. Pickles were made by humans that were made by nobody. Okay? Pickles are literally, like, we took God's fucking bad creation, and we made it tasty.

I just hope, like, one day someone, like, looked at him and was like, Ronnie, you call this a fucking gurkin, you kiss his shit. Yeah, she's like, no, take a look, this is what I call a fucking gurgent. He sees, like, purple little, like, incest-filled penis. Gurken, this is barely a cornishone. I fucked my daughter for a long time. I know what Gherkins are. And there's one thing this incest lover knows it's tiny pickles. That's what I love.

I love pickles. Well, Ronnie paired that job with a night shift at a Del Monte frozen food plant, neither of which were jobs befitting an Air Force man of Ronnie Jean's self-styled stature. There's corn nimblets fucking everywhere. I'm sick of goddamn tired. This fucking little peas in my shoes This place fucking sucks I'll go home and fuck my

All right All right We're sick of hearing it We're getting a little too into character Yeah I'm shaking it Hey No I can't do anything in this country

That's all right Henry doesn't have a family No Yeah that's a very important thing to remember although he does have two female dogs. I'm a girl dad to two dogs and the idea of what he even thought of doing to his daughter makes me sick. Just thinking of burdening Karmie with the child makes me so sad. She's been looking good lately.

Thank you. Yeah, we've been working on it. Growing up that, Karmie. Yeah, really. You wait your turn. Watch out when you take her to the dog park. Yeah, I know, she's a flirt I like it when they say that about children

Oh, I hate it when people refer to a child as a flirt He's a little flirt I don't think people do that anymore I think that was more of an 80s and 90s He's a little cock sucker My son You're fucking coxswain Well before long

Ronnie Jean quit his job at Del Monte And got a part-time job as a cashier at a local mini mart where he played the part of the local pain in the ass right up until his eventual murder spree a few years later what a horrible job for him to have interacting with everybody in town people every single day like i could imagine like not going to the mini marts like that fucking ronnie that ronald simmons is working there i don't want to fucking go oh my god how many times did like the cast register not open and he just like punched it out of range Fuck this. Fuck this shit.

Goddamn bull. I said, I said, enter. Enter. Fuck you. Fuck you. It's another fucking thing sent from Asia to ruin my life. Now Ronnie Jean's desire for mass murder was by no means an overnight invention. Instead, it seems like the path truly began in 1984 when Ronnie's world began getting shakier and shakier. As such, he retreated into an inner world both mentally and physically where murder became the only possible

solution to his problems. See, in the summer of 1984, Ronnie Jean's daughter, Sheila, married Dennis McNulty. Simmons thereafter went into a full extended pout, shutting himself away in the only room in the mobile home that had a lock. In his little locked room, Ronnie Gene ate junk food alone

and mopily masturbated to old-nude Polaroids of his daughter for hours on end. Ah, damn, I got Zagnut all over this one. Fuck All right Nutrageous now It's not milked Payne

There we go There we go There's no chocolate In the payday Her 11th birthday I'll always remember We went to Chuck E cheese You know

That might be the end of it Yeah That might be the last That might be the last one I think we can Put that to bed now Well, I'll take my Charleston chew and I'll go to the bathroom. Ronnie Jean's other kids, meanwhile, were also starting to grow up, leave home, and start families of their own.

By this point, three of the Simmons children had left and married, while Ronnie Jean's wife Becky was also asserting her own independence. After years of isolation, Becky reconnected with her sister and told her everything about the decades of trauma with her husband, from the abuse to the incest. Soon after, Becky began comparing notes with Gene Jr., and the two of them concluded that Ronnie Jean was not only, most likely an obsessive compulsive, but was probably a full-on sociopath, right on the money. In other words, the family was starting to pull away and see Ronald Gene Simmons for what he really was. From what it sounds like, he could feel it in his bones by the mid-80s that his entitled fantasies were never going to manifest.

And things got even more unbearable for Ronnie Jean when he took a job at a local freight company as a clerk. He was a man in an office of women. And taking orders from women, which he unsurprisingly despised, made him even more morose and irritable. The only thing Simmons did like about his job at the freight company was a 21-year-old named Kathy, who looked similar to Ronnie's daughter, Sheila. Let me ask you something, Candy. How do you feel about fathers? I guess it's not over yet, huh? Did I make you?

I just quaint. I just want to know. Well, Simmons acted as if he actually cared about Kathy in order to gain her trust. Before long, Kathy was indeed opening up to this fat, balding, 44-year-old loser. Very quickly, though, Ronnie started making Kathy uncomfortable by showing up to work with flowers and inviting Kathy to his home at Mockingbird Hill. Simmons would also rant to this office full of women about all the ways in which the women in his life were causing him suffering, which did not make him popular either. Fire him.

Well, that's what everyone else probably did. What the problem is is that that's going to be an issue. Yeah. Yeah. Now, everything came to a head at the freight company when Ronnie Jean got into a fight with his boss, a woman named Joyce Butts. Yeah, they should call you Joyce asses.

That's really clever, Ronnie. Yeah. Yeah, really fucking clever, Ronnie. Yeah, you're right. Regular fucking Lenny Bruce, aren't you, Ronnie? I know. Oh, you're... Oh, you're making, oh, fuck you, bitch.

I got it. That's really clever. I can't, you fucking bitch. Well, in July of 1986, Joyce reprimanded Ronnie for failing to properly sort and code company bills according to company policy. Because Simmons pushed back by repeatedly insisting that his way was better. I like doing it wrong and slow.

That's how it's supposed to be. That's how shit doesn't get. Done. Simmons and butts got into a shouting match in front of everyone. So Joyce gave Ronnie an official write-off in his personnel fire. A few months later, Ronnie walked into Joyce's office and literally told her to take this job and shiv it. Like the song! Yeah.

Right after he told his crush Kathy, quote, I hope you're happy now. And nobody knew exactly why. I hope you're happy now. Nobody knew exactly why Ronnie Jean quit that day specifically, nor did they know why Kathy should be happy about it. From what it seems like, Ronnie Jean was fully retreating into an impenetrable world of entitlement in rage. Because once he quit his job at the freight company, the countdown towards family annihilation began. I tell you right, now I'm coming right back here for you, butts.

I'm coming right back here for you, butts. And you fucking know it, all right? Your butts or mine butts Watch your ass Buts Coming for you I'm gonna stick my face right in there I'm sorry

I didn't mean to be sexual I'm trying to stop that I'm trying to curb that Kathy if you want to be sexual I have free time I will peruse your butts The Ronnie Jean's grip on his family was indeed

slipping. But Simmons did try various manipulation tactics to regain control before he murdered everyone. Tried begging first. He apologized to Sheila for fathering an incest baby. Hey, that's a first step. It's a bit, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then he insisted to Becky that he had changed, that he was going to bring the family back together. But like many abusers, Ronnie Jean made it all about himself rather than taking any responsibility. In one letter to Becky, he wrote, quote, you just don't know what it's been like for me. For me. For me. Have you thought about how I feel about impregnating my daughter? You have the idea how hard it is to groom somebody for that long?

With all the opportunities? How often people are slinging bush at me? But I had to say no to? The family, however, was not buying it. In Becky's letters to her sister in the months before the massacre, she referred to Jean as old crazy and called him a jerk. Oh, God. But, I mean, it doesn't sound bad.

It would have been unthinkable a few years. years before for her to even utter a single like bad word about him and now she's you know openly telling people about it and additionally jean's attempts at molesting his other daughter loretta had been thwarted see becky didn't want when it happened to sheila to happen to loretta so becky had well prepared loretta in secret to watch out for her father as such loretta only communicated with her father by slipping letters underneath the door of ronnie jean's locked masturbation junk food room where he was spending much of his time. I'm sick of reading your erotica.

All right, I'm sick at it is. What is? A court of thorns and roses? If you would have just stuck to the junk food masturbation room, everything would have been fine. Yeah, I mean, I think that's the case with many men. You know, I like it in here. Like, if he was just in this masturbation room

and just been like, my happy place. Well, that's the famous quote is that many of humanity's trouble comes from man's inability to sit alone in a room. Oh, sure. Oh, very much so. As for Ronnie Jean, it was obvious that violent thoughts were entering his mind. He took to shooting

stray dogs, armadillos, and other critters around his property, which he would dump in shallow graves around mocking birdhills 13 acres. Can't wait to dig much bigger, grave! Oh, look, there's a grave already dug! Oh, that's crazy. I just can't

Can you imagine if this grave could fit you? Loretta, I got you a dog costume. Would you mind trying it on for me? We're up for a little there and are now. Well, Simmons also began making sideways violent threats towards his family. In one example, Sheila and her husband Dennis arrived at mocking her Birdhill for a visit just a few months before the massacre. Ronnie Jean, however, physically stepped in between them and said that Dennis wasn't welcome at mocking Bird Hill because Simmons blamed Dennis for his own daughter basically breaking. up with him. After arguing about Dennis for a while, Ronnie Jean grabbed his 22 revolver from

inside the trailer and went out back to shoot bottles and rocks in the yard. I'm going outside with my gun. No. No. After firing off dozens of rounds without saying a word, Simmons went inside and Dennis and Sheila left. Seeing that their father's behavior was only getting more chaotic, Becky and Ronnie Jean's kids tried convincing Becky to leave. But while she agreed that her husband was a nightmare, she still refused to leave him because of her. Because ironically, she was afraid of what he would do if she left and took the kids. Well, we know that that is the most dangerous point in an abusive relationship is trying to leave. Yes.

Always. That's usually when all the bad shit happens. It also just shows, like, how much fun it is to watch people shoot guns. Well, they should have left the moment he pulled out the gun. But, like, you know, let's see what he does. It's so funny when he does do it. See how fast I can do it. See how fast I can.

Up behind my head. I'm putting my balls. Wild Bill Hickok The November of 1987 was quiet at Mockingbird Hill. None of the kids who had moved away visited even on Thanksgiving and Ronnie Jean stayed locked inside his masturbation room day and night. When he did emerge, it seemed as if he was distracted by something, preoccupied. I just can't believe I couldn't get it up to Kathy Lee this morning.

Little did the family know that Ronnie Jean had made a list of all the people he was planning to kill, which included not only his wife and kids, but also Joyce Butts and Kathy Kendricks from the freight company, who were still burning Ronnie Jean's ass a full year after he quit. Dude, it's a year later. He's still angry at old butts. Ronnie Gene, however, was not shy about what he was planning. Reportedly, the bread delivery man at the mini-mart said that Simmons had told him that Simmons had been maligned by several people, but he was soon. enough, going to get even

with all of them. Listen, I just got the bread. Let me tell you something, Ronnie. I'm not going to adjad right here. You're the third man this week telling me his plans of mass murder. I just want to know if you want these new hollabreds.

If you want these new whole wheat. I have a personal responsibility that anyone who says they're going to kill someone, I just give them extra bread so they like me. Hey, don't kill me. All right, have a good day now. Just a heads up.

What day are you planning on getting even? Christmas Day! Great. You know, bagels already have holes in. Live from your grave. Now, the Simmons family had decided that they were all going to work together to get their mother to leave Ronnie Jean that Christmas. And they began coordinating on ways to get their mother to safety.

Of course, New, the Henry said that the most dangerous time for anyone in an abuse of the relationship is when they leave. So they were trying to do it right. But Ronnie Jean had already decided to murder his entire family that very same holiday. And so on December 18th, Ronald Gene Simmons quit his job at the mini-mart in preparation for what was to come. He told off his boss saying he was leaving because he was tired of work in there. This mart ain't big enough. It's too many. I need a maximum mark.

You got the worst hours and the worst pay out of everyone. Again, it's entitlement. Ronnie Jean then waited for the day that his eldest son was set to visit, December 22nd, 1987. See, Simmons had surmised that Gene Jr. had been the one who had turned the whole family against him. Because if you remember, Gene Jr. was the first person in the family to actually stand up to Ronnie Gene. So, Simmons decided that he would begin the annihilation of his family on the day that Gene Jr. came to visit. Now, I feel like a lot of people, not that everyone has a kill list, but I almost feel like there is a therapeutic way for you to make the list and then burn it.

If you make the list of everybody, all the people you want to kill across the world and all across all pay all things. Yeah. And you write the list out just to get it out of your system. Get a Polaroid of it. You might help. And then you burn the list. And like, well, you say you talk about writing an angry letter and then you never mail it. Yeah, of course.

Yeah. You don't think I would help? who's number one on your list Henry yeah oh I don't know if I should say I think he shouldn't I think that's a I think that's something for a private conversation it's for Christmas oh yeah maybe who's just

picking a Christmas list all the people I want to deliver to Jesus Christ now Ronnie Jean didn't sleep at all the night before the massacre so he emerged from his masturbation room on the morning of December 22nd, jittery and irritable. He's living alone by this point, right? No, it's him, his wife, and

four kids. Oh, okay. I thought the wife was gone. No, no, no. The wife had not left it. No, they're all there. Can we get the home alone theme? No. We can't do that. Okay. No, no. Can't do it, Henry. Just checking. Well, Becky was in the bathroom

on that day while Gene Jr. was somewhere in the trailer with his three-year-old daughter. Ronnie Jean's four school-aged children, meanwhile, all between the ages of 17 and 8, had their last breakfast, then left for school. Once they were gone, Ronald Gene Simmons took his 22-caliber snub-nosed pistol and methodically began the devil's business. Becky was the first ago, shot twice in the head, while Ronnie Jean's eldest son, Gene Jr., was killed with four headshots and a bullet to the chest.

Some accounts say that Ronnie Jean even smashed in their skulls with a two-foot length of pipe. After killing the adults, Simmons then strangled his three-year-old granddaughter to death with a length of yellow nylon fishing line. Once everyone else was dead, Simmons loaded the bodies into a wheelbarrow and dumped them in the outhouse pits that his children had dug on his orders. After that, Ronnie Jean simply waited at Mockingbird Hill for the school day to end so he could pick up his other four kids. As a show of power over the sun he'd just murdered, Ronnie arrived in Gene Jr.'s Buick, then drove all of his remaining children home. Once they got back to Mockingbird Hill,

Simmons told them that he had a Christmas present for each of them, but wanted to give them their presents individually and alone. So the children were to wait in the Buick, while the others went inside one by one. The first to die was Loretta, the 17-year-old, who was taken inside and quickly garotted, again with nylon fishing line. She struggled, but after Simmons pushed her to the ground,

he laid his knee on her chest and pulled the garot tight until she lost consciousness. To make sure she was dead, he then dragged her to the bathroom and plunged her head into the water barrel they kept for washing and such because there was still no running water in the house. Simmons then repeated the process with his other three children all the way down to the eight-year-old.

And after killing them all, Simmons watched TV and drank wine and beer for a bit, before finally dumping the bodies of his children in the same privy pit where he dumped the three family members he'd killed that morning. He then soaked the bodies in kerosene but covered the pit with sheets of tin and barbed wire instead of lighting the fire. He finished the afternoon by trashing the house so he could possibly claim that a maniac had stormed the place

and killed everyone but him. And after that impotent task was done, Ronnie Jean sat back down in front of the TV with a beer and watched Wheel of Fortune to contemplate the murder of half his family. God damn. It's a annihilation. Nah.

No, no, that's that. Fuck, I hate this. I hate fucking letter. So he killed Loretta, strangled her. No, just shot her in the head. Oh, you shot Loretta in the head. Oh, no, Loretta, yeah.

Loretta was strangled Loretta. There's three other kids are sitting outside in the Buick. So what? He opened the door and he would like call for the next one and they walked in and then... Yeah, just one by one. And there wasn't any...

he's screaming and I mean there's no way to really know I guess yeah well what do we know and what are they gonna and also if even if there was screaming or struggle or what are they going to do their children you know he's a full grown man I mean what we've said on the show before and I think that what people don't particularly if you haven't been anywhere where a gun is shot

yeah even from inside a gun sounds way weirder than way different than maybe you think it is especially as a kid especially a 22 and I know they've been around guns but still like this idea but 22 is a really small gun and so you're growing into the room I could definitely see it be done in a way

that it's fairly not subtle but I can see it done in a way in which they don't quite understand the kids don't quite understand what's happening well that by that point there was no gunshot because like the only kids are just doing it yeah the kids were all garotted

with a fishing wire so like the most they might hear is like a scream or you know some struggle but you know he's doing it in the trailer and the kids are all in the car so yeah they probably had no idea what was going on Yeah, and especially every time he comes out with a new piece of Christmas flare on, and he's getting more excited. He's got, like, ornaments on his nipples.

He's coming out. He's got elf shoes now. Every time he comes out, it's something new, and you're like, wow, that's amazing this year. He's not. No. It's the worst year. Yeah, it's a bad year for him. Now, Ronnie Jean kept to himself on the night he committed his first seven murders.

When he wasn't drinking and watching TV, he was going out to the privy pets to stare at the corpses he'd made to kick off the Christmas. Christmas holidays. But on the 23rd, he drove to a nearby seers and picked up a stereo system he'd ordered for his wife. He then returned home and set fire to the corpses, then spent Christmas Eve and Christmas day moping around the house, blaming his family for doing this to themselves. And what was he listening to on his new stereo system? I'm guessing Barbara Streisand's Christmas album.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, jingle, jingle, jingle, jingle, jingle, jingle, jingle, jingle bells. Yeah, yeah, well, you're close. It's like, jing, jingle, jingle bell. Jingle bells All the way That's what it is. Sounds terrible. It is.

I love it. She's no business to get the Christmas She's very Jewish. I don't go for that Jew Christmas. I like a Don Ho's Christmas. I like a Hawaiian Christmas. I want a blonde-headed man.

I mean, all the great Christmas songs are written by Jews. That is true. Irving Berlin. And Jesus Christ. Yeah, it's all about them. Number one. Remember that this Christmas.

when you're killing family. Oh, I do. The massacre, however, was only a third of the way done. On December 26th, Ronnie Jean's son, Billy, arrived at Mockingbird Hill with his wife and child. Sheila and her husband were due to arrive that day as well, along with the child she'd had with her husband, Ronnie, and Ronnie Jean's incestuous child-grandchild.

Now, Billy Simmons had known something was up before he even arrived. He'd called his grandmother on the way to Mockingbird, Hill and she told Billy that she'd been worried because nobody had answered the phone at the trailer for several days. Sheila was worried as well because she hadn't heard from Gene Jr. since the 21st. But despite these massive red flags, Billy and Sheila still went to Mocking Bird Hill without calling the police, most likely because they were holding onto the hope that their worst fears had not come true.

I also bet you they were kind of half opening that he just killed himself. Yeah, and maybe her mother was somewhere else. Yes. Yeah. But he's also, I mean, like, he's been physically abusive by this point, right? Oh, very much, yeah. Yeah. But he's never, like, taken it to the next level like this. No. But he's been a terrorist

to the family. Like, he's emotionally violent, and he's been threatening violence, and he's been amping up all the gun and all the gun and all the gun activity. So it's like he's been very much getting them ready. But you still never think it's going to happen to you. You just think it's a story that you hear.

Of course. If you thought it would happen to you, everyone would say you're wrong. It's not going to happen to you. You don't have to go home for Christmas. You really don't. That's the biggest lesson here is that you don't have to ever go home for Christmas. Well, as it went, Ronald Gene Simmons killed his son, Billy, with his revolver as soon as Billy walked in the door, killed him with two shots to the head. while Billy's wife was killed just after with seven shots to the head and neck.

Now, we have no idea why, but Ronald Gene Simmons bifurcated his murder methods into one method for the adults and one for the children. While all the adults were quickly shot in the head, the kids all died agonizing extended deaths by strangulation, which really is the opposite of what you'd expect. Not really. He's a fucking pussy. He knew he couldn't win the fight. Yeah. He's an old man at this point. I didn't think about it that way because I thought about it from the perspective. of like, you know, like, I would, if I had to kill a family,

I'd want to get the kids over with quickly. I wouldn't want to, like, sit in the murder of the children. But he's putting the, then I can also see, it's not even just a fight. I could see a psychological thing of killing the kids. And then this sort of like a symbol of the future of the family, you want to put all of your pain. And you're going to make them feel the pain of it. Yeah.

Because he hated the kids. He resented the children most of. all because he literally couldn't control their futures. But the weird thing was is that he really did, he separated it between like 18 and up and 18 and under. Like even his own children who were, you know, in their early 20s. Like I think Sheila was only like 21 or something like that, maybe 20 years old. Yeah.

Still shot in the head. You know, like, but the end, but Loretta, who was 17, strangled with the fishing line. I think Ronnie's tale is a tale of the life unexamined. And kind of what happens when you don't look in. And I think that Ronnie, I might be stepping out of my bouncer a little bit. Go for it, buddy. I don't know if Ronnie has thought about what he wants. Right.

Or how really, in the end, really how he feels. Yeah. And he doesn't know who he is. And it kind of comes out like this. Yeah, because if you don't know who you are, you don't know what you want. Yeah, and sometimes you end up fucking your daughter and putting a baby inside of her and then murder and later on. That is sometimes what happens.

It can happen that way. With people, yeah, man. Your thesis is upsetting. Just be careful. that's why start that band that's what this is about start that band paint that picture well in this

the third murder spree Billy and his wife had brought their baby to marking bird hill and after shooting the baby's parents Simmons once again used the nylon fishing line to strangle his grandson before holding him underwater in the bathroom water barrel

afterward the bodies were all dragged into the double wides dining room where Ronald Gene Simmons awaited the last of his family now just a few hours After Ronnie Jean killed Billy and his family, Sheila arrived with Dennis and their two children. Sheila entered the house first, where Ronnie Jean shot her as soon as she walked inside, six times in the head. Now, to hear in the gunshots, Dennis ran inside as well and was killed by a single headshot.

And this is also like an interesting psychological thing, is that every time he shoots a woman, he shoots them far more times than he shoots the man. The man gets one, maybe two bullets. Just knocked out. The women anywhere between four and seven. It's almost like his version of ultraviolence with the gun on them. Yeah, no, he wants to destroy them as much as possible. He's got this rage towards women specifically. And he hates the kids.

And he hates the kids. Yeah. Rodney Jean then presumably went out to the car and got his six-year-old incest child so he could strangle her with a nylon fishing line as well. He then put the child's corpse until Loretta's bed and laid a blanket over the body. We have no idea why he treated this. corpse differently than all of the others. Is his favorite?

Probably. Yeah. I would imagine so. The last member of the family to be killed was Sheila's one-year-old son, who was strangled and drowned like all the rest of the kids. Once done, Simmons took the bodies of the two infants and wrapped them in garbage bags. The bags were taped shut, and the corpses were left in the trunks of two abandoned cars on his property. Finally, Ronald Jean Simmons took a tablecloth and draped it over Sheila's body.

He decided to leave the bodies of the people he killed on the 26th to rot in the trailer with him instead of taking him out to the pits. And by the end of it, Simmons had killed his wife, all of his children, all of his grandchildren, and two out of the three people his adult children had married. How many is that now? Twelve. Twelve people were dead in four separate murder sprees committed over two days. The only person in the Simmons family to survive the massacre was Gene Jr.'s

wife who only escaped because she was taking a break from her marriage to Jean Jr. after a rough patch. You know, this is probably a bad time to even think this, but it's crazy. You finally get the whole family together. It's crazy how much it takes a tragedy, doesn't it? It takes a tragedy to get the whole family together. Now, in the evening of December 26th, after Ronnie Jean had finished killing his entire family. He went to a nearby bar, ordered two cocktails, drank only one, and did not tip.

Prick. Yeah. Right? On the 26th. Yeah. Unbelievable. But bar patrons remembered that Ronnie, for some reason, continually toasted the empty chair next to him. But he was always an empty chair next to him.

It's not like the guy ever drank with anybody. Exactly. But, you know, but this time he was happy about it. The next day, Ronald Gene Simmons stayed home drinking and watching TV. but he also wrote a list. See Henry? See, He's just a list.

See, Roddy Jean was not done taking his revenge on the world just yet. Even though his family was dead, there were still plenty of other people who had wronged him in and around the town of Ward, Arkansas.

There was, of course, Kathy and Joyce at the freight company. But Simmons also planned to kill David Sawyer, his old boss at the mini-mart. His last target was the owner of the mini-mart. Rusty Taylor.

Oh, that's a guy who wants a mini-mark. Oh, yeah, Rusty Taylor's mini-mart. Yeah. He defended Simmons when he had sold the mini-mart without at least offering to sell it to his worst employee first. Ronald, I would absolutely love. Teller, Rossi Taylor. I would absolutely love to sell you this mini-mart. No question.

Absolutely not. But I don't know if you were or aware of the collateral on it, of the instructional integrity one must understand about the business. for Ronald. I don't know you're ready for this type of leadership. And are you ready for the grave responsibility of the slushy machine? It must be clean. It must be clean.

It's my struggle. Interestingly enough, I made a slushy out of my family. Exactly. It's that sort of self-referential sense of humor that will make me miss you always. I was Jean short for anything,

possibly Geneford. And so, after doing practice runs on four locations where his targets worked on the 26th and the 27th to time out the quickest routes between each business, Ronnie Jean exited his trailer on December 28th on a mission. He had decided to wear a big white cowboy hat for the occasion. And he carried with him three letters, a bottle of wine, a box of crackers from when he got peckish, and two 22 pistols. Once again, he drove Gene Jr.'s Buick into town as a last petty, fuck you to the son he had just murdered. I think this is him trying to be murdered by the public as well.

You know what? I don't think so. I really don't think so. I think he wouldn't have minded being murdered by the public. Now he's in falling down type world. Like now we're burning it all to the fucking ground. Yeah. I don't think he particularly cares, but I don't think he particularly cares.

actually, I do think he cares. I think his ego wants him to survive to the end. Yeah, so he can win, right? He has to win. And that's the way, as long as he gets to the end. He has to be murdered by the state. Yeah. That's how he wins.

As long as he shoots everyone on his list, that's how he wins. He's not trying to get killed. He's not trying to do suicide by cop. He's trying to take revenge on the world. That's all he cares about. And again, this is an inappropriate way to maybe even shoehorn this in. Sure, shoehorn away. But it's like, again, if you're thinking about, like, your goals, think about what's a

for you with what you have. Sure. And that's what Ronnie did, is that he realized, like, I got to stop dream and beg. And start thinking about what I can do now to make my dreams happy. Yeah. He can't kill Dan Quayle. No, he wishes. We all wished he could.

After mailing the letters, two letters to his nieces and one to his mother-in-law, Ronnie Jean drove to Kathy Kendrick's new place of work. Kathy, if you'll remember, was the woman who'd rebuffed Gene's sexual advances at the freight company. some flowers. I want to give you some flowers. I want to give you some flowers. Take you a flowers. Give you some flowers.

I want to have some flowers. But Kathy had since gotten a new job as a receptionist at a law firm. So at 10.15 a.m., Ronald Gene Simmons walked into the firm's offices with his revolver. Without saying a word, he strolled up to Kathy's desk while she was answering phones

and fatally shot her four times in the head. Sticking to his plan, Ronnie Jean left immediately. and drove to Taylor Oil Company where the owner of the mini-mart, Rusty Taylor, had his headquarters. Tellingly, Ronnie Jean did not

walk inside when faced with a male target and instead shot Rusty Taylor through a window. He's a bitch. He's absolutely a bitch. Yeah, no, absolutely. When Simmons turned to leave, he was confronted by a part-time employee of Taylor Oil named J.D. Schaffin. Gene shot Schaffin in the head

just once, but still fatally. Rusty Taylor, however, survived the attack, despite being shot twice in the chest. Yes, thank God. I had my Queen Elizabeth coronation plate in my shirt.

I knew one day the Queen's grace would save me. Rusty is short for Rustyford. By this point, the local police had been alerted several times over that a maniac wearing a white cowboy hat was rampaging through town.

Yeah, we'll call me when he's rampaging to my house. I'm all. You know, my shift, I ain't come back to a second. You just keep on going. You just, you keep it looking out of the hand. We had such a good year with not that many murders. I can't wait for this last week.

Ah, yeah. December 28, boys, we're finally going to celebrate. See you all in this town. And we did it right. Good work, boys. Let's start drinking. Somebody into that bomb that's been ringing for the last 30 minutes. No, no.

Of course, these guys had no idea who the shooter was or where his next target might be. So when Ronnie Jean showed up to the mini-mart to kill his old boss, David Salier, there was no police resistance. Now, David Salier was having coffee with another employee named Roberta and a 71-year-old local named Tony. Again, Ronnie Jean decided to shoot his male target through the window. But David saw Ronnie Gene raise his pistol, and David had enough presence of mind to duck before Simmons took his first shot. Once the gun fired, Roberta immediately tried going for the phone to call the police, but Ronnie Jean was unfortunately a very good shot. He got her twice, once in the mouth and once in the shoulder,

but Roberta thankfully survived. What? But once Roberta was down, Simmons turned back to his old boss, David, who grabbed a chair and actually began walking towards Simmons while shouting, Get out, you son of a bitch! Gene fired again, but the bullet hit the chair and ricocheted off into David. David's skull. David was down, but he would survive due to the heroic actions of the last man standing at the

many mark. That tough old buzzard was a surprisingly tenacious 71-year-old customer, Tony Carter. You think you're the meanest old fucking bastard in this, car? Can't you met me first. No one fucks around in Tony Carter, small town. Hey, Tony, this made my right-hand Himmler and my left-hand Oswald. See, when David went down, Tony grabbed a six-pack of soda cans and tossed him at Ronnie Jean's head. Take a fence!

Catch us! The six are missed. So Tony kept grabbing individual cans of soda, throw him at Simmons while shouting, you son of a bitch, over and over. It's like Simmons was a wild animal that Tony was trying to chase away. Like, get out of! Ow! Not Dr. Pab! No!

This is apparently the only pushback needed because Ronald Gene Simmons could only fire wildly at the old man before he gave up and ran off. What a fucking bitch! Again, all it took a 70-year-old man throwing cans of soda out and he's like, stop it! Somebody threw a chills at me!

They threw a jolt at me, call the army! And this is the guy that for years be like, if I would have been at the TED offense of those Fiatcons, Wouldn't I take in Saigon? Oh my God, he's got a diet spray! But since Simmons had worked at the mini-mart, Tony recognized him,

so he called the police to finally identify the mass shooter, terrorizing their small town. Ronnie Jean, however, still had one more score to settle. At long last, he drove to Woodline Motor Freight to murder his old boss, Joyce Butts. After walking to her desk, he shot her in the head and chest, then turned and walked to the... backroom. Joyce Butts, by the way, also survived. He was met in that back room by another woman

that had worked with him at the freight company, but luckily for her, all of Ronnie Jean's scores had been settled. You know what? I'm tired. I'm tired, boss. He put one of his pistols down, gave the other to his former co-worker, and asked her to call the police. They soon arrived and arrested Simmons without incident, just 45 minutes after his last shooting spree began. And he didn't even get fucking lit up or anything. That's what sucks about this.

He got exactly what he wanted. He did it all. He did it all. He lived his dream. Well, you know, they did get lit up with the electric chair. Yeah, but you wanted that. He didn't. Yeah. He wanted it. Just not as satisfying, is it?

It's not. I mean, thank God, though, he used a 22 and not like a 38 or something. I think it really did save a lot of these people's lives. It really did. Yeah. But yeah, he just liked a 22. Because he's a bitch. Yep. I mean, it was the gun you already had, so he wasn't a gun.

A 45 hurts my elbow. The cat's too much. Oh, my thumb hurts. Now, while Simmons was arrested at 11 a.m., it took until about three that afternoon before someone in the local police department finally figured it'd be a good idea to go check in on Ronnie Jean's family. They're not used to this stuff. They're really not. Yeah.

And when the police arrived, they quickly found the five bodies Simmons had left rotting in his trailer. and not too long after they found all the bodies in the privy as well. But the motivation behind everything was still a mystery. Ronnie Jean had refused to say anything since being arrested and simply laid in his jail cell staring at the ceiling. Well, he's a real prick. He's a real prick where he didn't give anybody a single bit of motive or anything. Yeah, he did.

I mean, but he's like, you know. Yeah, I mean, the only people Ronald Gene Simmons ever, talked to about the murders were his two public defenders who listened to Ronnie Gene's entire story over the course of two days during their initial meeting. But after that, Simmons refused to say anything ever again. He just told him what he did. Yeah, you told him what he did. Yeah, all the information that we really have from, like his life is from his family, like the surviving members of the family. And Gene Jr.'s wife. Yeah, and Gene Jr.'s wife. Yeah, he had decades of practice of not talking to people. Yeah, he's really good at it. Yeah, and he also knew that not saying,

anything would drive people fucking crazy. You know, he wanted, because it was more control. You know, he didn't want to control the narrative, because some of these guys are like that. They want to control the narrative, so they say what they've done. But he wanted to just, he knew what would cause the most suffering. It's his biggest

accomplishment. Yeah. It's the only thing he's ever fucking done. Yep. Yeah. In fact, Simmons refused to cooperate with his defense team at all, even though he still pled not guilty. The defense was left with only a weak argument that the perpetrator of the family massacre was actually

Sheila's husband, Dennis McNulty. Whoa, what the fuck? Yeah, come on. You don't have to throw him under the bus. Fucking shit. Come on. Defenders? Yeah, no. It was some kind of Asian. We're pretty certain that there was a several

group of five Asian mercenaries that have come in here and did their most Asian violence on this white family. Yes. We all know that Asian McNulty family. Yeah, the Chinese McNaulties, you know that.

They're in there, downtown China. They have a whole pub section. They love their Irish people over there. But this defense didn't really do much to defend Ronnie Jean's spree in town on the 28th. The only action Simmons took over the course of his trial was when he told his attorneys to watch out, because he was about to demonstrate what he called his mitigation neutralizing maneuver. That maneuver simply amounted to Ronnie Jean punching the trial's prosecutor in the jaw. This, however, was all a part of the plan.

Simmons boasted that his mitigation neutralizing maneuver, which I found are the three hardest words to type in a row that I've ever typed. Mitigation neutralizing maneuver? Yeah, it's a pain in the ass. I don't even like hearing it. No, I, I, and you know what, I hate saying it. I can't believe that he said it. Simmons boasted that this would ensure he got the death penalty.

And in this, he was correct. Death was Ronnie Jean's wish, because after he was sentenced, he requested. that no action be taken to appeal or change the death penalty. It's truly the epitome of a fucking bastard. Yeah. The only thing decent that he did. Yeah.

Sort of. Was die. Yeah. I mean, well... I guess he didn't cost us a lot of money as to the American public, but... Yeah, that is true. Now, Ronald Gene Simmons obviously wanted to die, but from what it seems like, at least my perspective, his narcissism was so strong that he could never kill himself.

He could never bring himself to actually do it. He thought he was correct. Yeah. He did it all because he thought he was correct. And then he was correcting the universe. Mm-hmm. Well, instead, he had the state do it for him. Bill Clinton himself, acting as governor of Arkansas, signed the execution warrant.

And, you know, it's, I don't know why I find executions signed by, you know, future presidents when they were governor. They're kind of special. They are. Like, when something's signed by, like, George W. Bush when he was, like, like, Carla Faye Tucker's execution. order. Like, that's George W. Bush. It's like finding out, like, you went to Wendy's and like the guy, like, Thomas made the burger. Yeah.

You know what I mean? Like, that guy made the burger. I even like it when, like, the failed guy, like, Jeb Bush, that's Eileen Wernos, you know? Oh, wow. Interesting. You know, Clinton, though, he not only signed it, he also played taps on a saxophone. That was fun. I miss him. I miss him. I miss him.

He was not dead. He missed him. I want to go for him again. I can't wait for him. Well, after Ronald Gene Simmons had a public battle in the newspapers with a Christian organization that tried to save his life, he had to write letters to the newspaper saying, like, tell these people to stop filing appeals for me. I said, no. Quit crying for me. I'm sick of your goddamn pity. I love that, man.

I mean, but that's good. Annoy him. Yes, annoy him. Always. Go for him. Well, it was finally put to death. I'm sick of all these damn trying to give me cats. All these fuckers in here trying to give me cats and shit, trying to run.

raise a cat. Fuck a cat. He was finally put to death on June 27th, 1988, which is kind of half Christmas. He was killed just one year and four months

after his conviction, making his death by lethal injection the second fastest in modern history at the time. Right behind double murderer,

Gary Gilmore. Merry Christmas, one and all. Yay! And we're really getting into the spirit this year. We even got like a Christmas-themed episode coming up next week as well. We do. Next week's episode is a one-off that I am so excited for.

Horrifying history. It's like featuring one of the most storied objects in all of Christmas history. Yes. It's a surprising one. And it's really fucked. That's the best part. It's fucked up. Yeah, it's extraordinarily fucked.

Santa's Slay. S-L-A-Y. Which was a fun movie. With starring Goldberg, we watched it together. That's right. That was when he tucked, right? And he did the thing where he was with abhorah, I believe. Then he did that.

Yeah, yeah. Slee. Yeah, yeah. He's serving cunt this year. I hope you were nice as here, because Santa's serving cunt. And you can go get it on patreon.com. I thought that's got a call. What? I thought Kant's got coal.

No. No, no, no, he's serving Kant. Charisma uniqueness, nerve, and talent. Yeah. He's serving cunt. He's got that bossy on a fire. Thank you guys for watching. Yeah. Patreon.com slash last

podcast on the left is where you can go to watch all of our video episodes as well as watching the stream every Tuesday last stream on the left. That is at 6 p.m. Every single Tuesday, 6 p.m. P.S. And I want to

to thank a listener named Ryan Marchetti who sent me some of the, like possibly one of the coolest things I've ever gotten. He sent me pictures of his grandfather from World War II as well as the newsletter that his grandfather's

company got during, like at the end of World War II, like listen to this. It's called Carry on. It's all over in Holland, Denmark, and Northwest Germany. The second great unconditional surrender in the last five days was time to take effect an hour ago. 800 British double summertime.

This is incredible. Thank you so much. You really shouldn't have sent me a family heirloom. But, man, I love this. That's really, really cool. 90th finds Reich gold. All the golden Germany, says Reich's big official. That's amazing. His grandfather's part of the dirty dozen.

Yeah. Yeah, there's a picture of him standing in front of a swastika that they probably blew up right afterwards. Wow, that's awesome. Yeah, so thank you. Thank you. Once again, Ryan Marchetti for such a cool thing. Yeah, this is his grandfather, Joseph Pitt Marchetti.

Wow. 90th, Infantry, 3.59th Division, World War II. The Tough Ombres out of Texas and Oklahoma. Fuck, yeah. Well, I hope he comes and sees us on the road. Hit me up. If you do, I'd love to meet you. We're going to be in Philadelphia on January 31st, Austin, Texas, February 28th.

Indianapolis, Indiana, March 13th, Cincinnati, Ohio, April 25th. Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, May 29th. Grand Rapids, Michigan, June 27th. Tulsa, Oklahoma, July 17th, Oklahoma City, July 18th. These shows are so much fun for fucking having a great time. Akron was a blast. We're in Portland this weekend, but I'm pretty sure it's sold out by now. You might get lucky snag a ticket, so go check it out if you want to come out.

Also, I got some stand-up shows coming up. I'm going to be in Oxnard on January 4th with a whole bunch of people from the last podcast network. And I'm going to be in San Francisco on February 18th. Come and see those shows. police. Yes! I love it. Thank you. Hale Satan. And I won't, I won't kill anybody this Christmas. I know you won't. You know why? Why? Because I'll be safely, peacefully stoned in my home. Nice. That's really nice. Just don't fuck Carmelita. Hey! Now I let my daughters be free.

Oh yeah. I make my dogs wear pants. Damn, cut that down. Don't worry about that. Well, hail Steve Cropper, too. He passed away today. I love Steve Cropper. Blues Brothers Band will never be the same. That's right. And hail the tough embrace.

Yep. Ah, well, yeah. Liberating us from the Nazis. Good work, guys.