Last Podcast On The Left - Last Update on the Left - Episode 9 - The Bridgewater Triangle Re-Examined (Live at Sirius XM)

Episode Date: November 14, 2025

This week on Last UPDATE on the Left - the boys bring you a very special live recording from The SiriusXM Garage in LA, revisiting a fan favorite topic, traveling back to the land of the Pukwudgie, Bigfoot, and other forgotten beasts... the mysterious - Bridgewater Triangle. For Live Shows, Merch, and More Visit: www.LastPodcastOnTheLeft.comKevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Last Podcast on the Left ad-free, plus get Friday episodes a whole week early. Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus.  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Live of your blaze. That's when the cannibalism started. Last update on the left. Oh, yes! Holy shit! You were it like in a Magneto game. Come on, guys. Hey!

Let's get comfortable. Welcome to last update on the left, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you so much for coming. here today. You. I'm Eric's Parks. With me is Henry Zabrowski. Sure.

And put your hands together for Ed Larson, ladies and gentlemen. Please. How you doing? What's going on? My boy. Now, this is the first time we've ever done because we are just going to do our podcast in front of all of you, which sort of feels like I'm taking a shit and you're all watching.

But I do think that this one's going to be good. I think this is going to be fantastic. I think this is going to be really good. Welcome to last update on the left. This is our, like, you know, we're going back through old topics. We did a couple of these. We did a little touch of John Bonae Ramsey. That's a bad

way to phrase it. But we touched upon John Bonae Ramsey this week on the show. And I've got to tell you what, I think she's going to be all right. Do you all hear the episode today? Yeah. Yeah, if you want to

hear something real funny is that we record these a little bit in advance and on Monday, we recorded an episode and we were right in the middle of it and we're like talking about this guy we're like watch this motherfucker die this week watch him die the second we hit the second publish we fucking o j simpson dead today at the age i was shit yeah finally it took us to do this you know he's doing great in heaven him and nicole brown or join themselves they haven't reunited. Is this hard?

Is there hard to start like that? Well, the update that we're going to do for all of you today is an old, I guess, poop-reepisode. It's got cryptids. It's got UFOs. It's got Myriter. It's the Bridgewater Triangle. Yes. The first ever American-based haunted triangle that's not in Alaska. But Alaska is now new. Alaska's a new triangle.

Bridgewater Triangle is the old triangle from 1983. Yeah. Isn't that weird? It was born in 1983. It's been haunted for centuries. Yeah, it's been fucked up forever. Yeah, but then the guys didn't gather. Is it haunted unless a bunch of people get together and say it's haunted,

especially with a Ton-Ton-Based accent, Ton-Ton-Massachusetts, which I already can hear, the fucking furious Massachusetts-based emails for all of their weird counties and cities and all of the names don't make any sense and they are never read as they are spelled. I thought that we got in trouble last time for calling it Taunton,

or that we called it Taun-Ton, and it was supposed to be called Taunton. It's Taun. It's Taunton. It's not Taun-Ton. It's not Taun-Ton-Ton. No, it's not Taun-Ton-Ton. No.

I wish it was Toon-Twan because then I would be right. But I did get, it's Rehoboth. You see that? That's the far right. Is that a right? Angle? That one. Rehobah.

Man, I thought it looks like a fucking like a black metal band. Rayhole ball. It's not. It's a shitty city in Massachusetts. Now, we covered the subject a ways back, but the Bridgewater Triangle is actually such a massive paranormal and criminal hotspot that we had to leave a lot of stories out of the episode. And we've discovered even more events that we didn't even hear about back when we did our Bridgewater series. Also, if you follow the Bridgewater Triangle Paranormal Investigators YouTube page, you will

see that during COVID, I think a couple of them lost their main jobs and then hunting things within that the triangle became their new main jobs and they honestly, they seem to be really doing well. There's a lot of meth in the Bridgewater Triangle. I think

it might be all the wives getting together and starting all this stuff just so the guys hit the woods and get some hikes in. Yeah, yeah. It really does help for them to see a pine cone. It's the only thing keeping them alive is them searching for a skunk Well, to give a refresher, the Bridgewater Triangle is located within a 200-square-mile radius, with three points between Arlington, Freetown, and Roboth in southeastern Massachusetts.

Since colonial times, it's come to be a hot spot for bizarre, mysterious, and sinister activities from cryptids to UFOs to supposed satanic sacrifices. And they also remind you a lot on this YouTube channel that it's. It is not just to the triangle. It does happen to bleed outside of the triangle. To places such as Krikmamp or Rahmanamon, like all these other weird names I've never heard before. Doesn't that just make the triangle bullshit? No. Doesn't that just mean Massachusetts is real fucked up?

It is. It's horrible everywhere. It's just triangles are a fun, scary shape. We talked about this on the Alaskan triangle episode. How many sizes of pyramid have again? It has. We now know a pyramid has four sides and has a square bottom. First time

I was right. It was so cool. It was. It was true. But also pyramids, we know spiritually can be circles. If you're in the UK, spiritually a pyramid can be circles. You just have to allow that in. You have to stop fighting that information and just let it be real. Dude, Ed just fucking solved it. It's a cone.

A cone. It's a fucking cone. Yeah, man. You've had ice. cream before, right? Yeah? Holy shit. I'm eating in a triangle. I thought only pizza was triangle. Yeah, a circular

cone is how it goes. Fill it with meat. That's what I say. That's from your pretty face is going to hell, and that has already been fucking co-opted. Someone stole that bit. Chili cone Gary. Yeah, well, they used to do it back in the day

at Disney. They had a waffle cone filled with meat. Chili, yeah, they used to fill it with chili. They did not actually put chili in the cone. Yeah, they did. I don't know what you want from me Do they still do that? They put chili on pizza?

No, but they still have a cone with pizza. So they put pizza inside, but it's already, I guess, you know, There's a bunch of cone-themed restaurants. We have passed out. Let's move on to the Bridgewater triangle. Yeah. We have not gotten to any content. We have not been going to show.

If you want to talk about cone-based meats, ask the guy with diabetes. Oh, I don't know. Hey, it's pre-diabetes. It's the prequel. Yeah, hopefully it never turns in a diaphetes. Well, today, some claim that a so-called Native American curse is the reason why the area is so rife with both paranormal activity and murder. This curse supposedly comes from the brutal conflict known as King Phillips War

that was fought between the Wampanoag people and the European colonists in the 17th century. You know, should have fought harder against the King Phillips War was Tom Hanks' people. Remember that fucking horrible movie? King Phillips. Who was it? Captain Phillips? Captain Phillips? Captain Phillips?

I'm the captain now? Yeah. Yeah. The one that took place off the coast of Somalia. Yeah. Who was the other one? He was like the politician. King Phillips something?

I think you're the Tom's Wilson's War. Yeah. Great job. Not a goddamn thing to do with any of that. We edit the show. We look back after we record a lot of times and we edit things out. things out. Yeah, that's the thing.

You guys are seeing all sorts of shit. You're seeing like Henry throwing everything against the wall. You're seeing me read everything. It feels really awkward, but this is the way it's done. This is how the sausage is made. And to the future people listening to this, I know you guys love live recorded podcast episodes. Yeah. I know the audience absolutely adores them because what they love, because a lot of times when

you're listening to podcasts, you're listening doing something else or you're alone or and you've got a lot of stuff going on, right, that is kind of like part of the podcast experience. But mainly you're alone, and no one's holding you. No one's, you're not having sex. You're not enjoying yourself. You're not at a bar. You're at an amusement park.

And so when you hear a podcast of other people laughing and having a good time in a room, you just realize like how empty the room is that you're in while you're listening to it. Yeah. Well, it's argued. But the triangle itself was the reason why the conflict King Phillips War was filled with so many beheadings and mass mutilations and such and such. And the strange happenings of the 20th and 21st century are simply a continuation of the triangle's influence. Yes, the fucking demonic triangle's influence.

Don't go near the trapezoid zone. Now, inside the Bridgewater. Don't want to go right there. You're going to end up kissing a dude. Don't go to the trapezoid zone, brother. You got to get married to Sarah this weekend, man. Now, inside the Bridgewater Triangle is an area called Hockamock Swamp. In this place, people have seen vicious dogs with red eyes, glowing lights, and ghosts galore.

In Algonquin, Hachamok translates to the place where spirits dwell. But in other contexts, it translates to mean the devil. hence devil's swamp Now this being a highly Forced way What Yeah feel free to ooh and all Yeah

You'd be like oh wow Actually Marcus All right It's Huckamuck What did I say You say in the O You see in Massachusetts

The only times they say Oh is when they're having sex with their father They never say those words They say it's Huckamuck Hachamuck Hachamuck So I shouldn't say, Hockamock. Yeah, because Hock sounds like the Iroquois name for a pit we all spit Lugie's into.

Now, this being a highly forested wetland, the Bridgewater Triangle has its own big foot. Disappointingly, it does not have its own fun nickname, like Indiana has the big muddy monster. Virginia has the woodbigger. Have we never covered the woodburger? I had never heard of the woodburger. until today. Literally today when I was writing this bullshit. I honestly thought I knew every

single iteration of Bigfoot. No. Woodbogger. How is he different? He's got allergies. Yeah, he's just a big Jewish guy with allergies in the wood. That's the Bigfoot. That's my dentist.

Well, instead, Bridgewater just has a big foot. Marge and hairy. Described as looking like a seven-foot bipedal bear. And to be fair, it could just be a bear. It could just be a bear. They roam the forests of Massachusetts. Black bears, they get to be around seven, eight feet tall.

Yeah, and they hurt their paw, and they stand up right, and they walk around. Yeah, if they're taking a shower, if they're out there, you know, you never know with a bear. Yeah, they work in restaurants, too. But in one case, this so-called bear lifted the back of a police officer's patrol car while the cop was out on a call to investigate a complaint that the big. foot was rummaging around in someone's garbage. I wish you could see the Bridgewater Triangle paranormal investigators talk about how this girl

I knew, she, it's like I get, all right, let me slide into it. Oh, you are right there. Oh, you betcha there. Oh, you betcha's the middle of the country, GFK, yeah, we're like, ah, you are, I, oh, yeah. Oh, come here, Maryland.

Okay. Come here, Maryland. That's what gets me into Boston. Yeah. Let me see you, Marilyn. But they talk about how their cousin's sister's father was the police officer whose big foot mess with his car. And he said, I'm not going back to that bridgewater. I can't do it. God damn it.

I'm not going back to Bridgewater. He won't go. He won't go. Because he said that he was scared because he's afraid of his trunk get and mess with again. But I just think the guy was hammered. Yeah. You know what's funny is that I don't have a single fucking story that actually occurs in Bridgewater. No, because it's the title of the triangle.

It is not the location of the triangle. It's the brand. Yeah, isn't Bridgewater outside of the triangle? There's three Bridgewater. It's where you look at the triangle. Oh, it's the viewing station. On the triangle. But even though it could very well be a really big bear that walks on its hind legs,

the big foot hunter that keeps the torch alive in Massachusetts is Joseph D'Andre, who had his first encounter. with in 1978 when he and his friends saw a dark-haired Sasquatch on the opposite bank of a river. After that siding, Joseph founded the Bridgewater Triangle Expedition Team, or Batette, for short, and he now leads frequent investigations armed with cameras and rifles. But since then, Joseph has never again seen another Bigfoot. Decades of Goose Egg. He has to meet with Batette and Batit. He has to meet with these guys every fucking week after he.

he saw Bigfoot one time. And everybody has to meet back up with Joe each week and be like, are you sure? Are you sure this is where you saw the Bigfoot there? And he just been like, I know I was here. I know. You know, no one does anything. They better get food or something.

Oh, man. You know the guys of Petit have big tits. Oh, Petit. Not even. Not even. Like I said, the magic of editing. Now, even if this big foot is really a big black bear, it still tracks with Bridgewater being an odd place when it comes to wildlife.

Sure. Because a gigantic bear is not the only abnormally large animal to be spotted in the area. And to be fair, they're now saying that a lot of Bigfoot sightings, there's like a, did you guys see the research that they talk about how the, the sightings of bears with mange, like this kind of type of mange that affects bears. Like, it definitely is in the Pacific Northwest. It's in Florida. It's in where, anywhere you see a big foot, it is probably a big foot with, it's probably a bear with the skin disease.

Right. That's good. Finally figured out, close the case on that one. But the thing is, is that, I feel like that's a normal occurrence. I also feel like there's probably a man to the mountain. But there's other animals inside of the Bridgewater Triangle that definitely don't belong there unless they were released by like a member. of the Celtics when he was done with it. Well, there's

a massive cat. It's called the Mansfield mystery cat. Yeah, it's a scary mystery cat. It asks its questions three and all of the answers are all... I'm chicken, please.

I'm a mystery cat. The mystery is, I have sex with your family. It's said to be the size of a great dane. fucking cat. Whoa, that's a big cat. Yeah. Oh, big cat, buddy. Now, it was thought that the mystery of the mystery cat was solved in May of 1993

when someone found the headless carcass of an African serval cat. But police themselves dismissed the theory. This ain't the big cat, because the serval only weighs about 30 pounds. Yeah, not anymore. Yeah, exactly. Lost five pounds. Now,

it's not just cats, though. there's other types of animals that they're on now one of my favorite phenomena as you guys know is i love large birds i love but i mean bigger than normal birds and i love when people see quote unquote dinosaurs now and there's something about the bridgewater triangle that for some reason attracts pterodactals now i have a good clip from a lady now this woman i want to say is a i'm not going to say she's not She's not being seduced by the Bridgewater Triangle paranormal investigators. But I think that she is, I don't know, she's involved. Flirting.

She's flirting. Like there is some kind of, there's a tension. There's a sexual tension here. I think it's just finally someone didn't think she was crazy. I mean, this woman has yelled this story several times at a wah-wah. For certain. So here it is. Kristen Evans tells her story to West Perjwada Community Access about her terror.

tactile sighting late one night in the town of Abington. One night I was driving down the street and Something hit my car and to my shock my entire windshield was covered in of all things yoke and there are pieces of shell about this big all over my car the next morning My mother said you're never going to believe what happened last night My friend and I were sitting outside in the backyard when all of a sudden we started

hearing crashes we ran out and Kristen we saw a teardectile they saw a teardactile of course I was like what are you talking about she's like it had dangly legs it was massive it was crashing

through the trees the trees are still broken if you want to go see so that happened around 10 o'clock and when this fucking story go on this is the end of the end of it I just It's 10 o'clock And then after that, you know, Tuesday's trash day

So we didn't I knew I went and looked and I saw claw marks So by the recycling And there was no way Because Marty, he puts that out On Wednesdays No, you know

It's a bad story I don't know much about birds But I know they don't shit out eggs While they fly You know what do Teradactals do? Also, was it a weaponized movement By the Terradactyl

against this woman? I know that they had a lot of lost emuos around there. It was probably just some kid picking up an emu egg and throwing it at the car. I don't put past the youth of inner Massachusetts of egging this woman with a bunch of

emu eggs. I don't put it past them. But I just... Look at the size of his fucking eggs. Oh my God. I hit that lady's car with his fucking eggs. You know what's right? In a suit, it'll get in action. It's a kill a family. Yeah.

Yeah, it's very possible. Or Teradactyl Teradactyl. Or it's Man, can you imagine if it was just a guy in a fucking hang glider? And he got caught out there. He's just literally

He's got a basket of emuaries. Somebody healthy? Is there anybody here? I see you there. That teradactile can talk. Live from your blade. But besides bears, cats, and the occasional obligatory big bird, strange animal noises have been heard around the shores of Lake Nip-Nipa-Nicket,

aka Lake Nip. Let's stick to Lake Nip, which lies within Hachemak Swamp. There, people have reported... Named things like fucking idiots. I think it's... There's a lot of allergies there. So I think it was a lot of old Native Americans with allergies. Just naming shit after making noises in their...

sleep. Well, Lake Nip, people have reported frequent monkey noises. Fuck you. In 1980s, several men traveling in a canoe saw little creatures milling about on an island in the middle of Lake Nip, although they saw them from a distance. These were not bigfoot-sized, but were closer to red-haired orangutans who walked upright like men. The travelers paddled to the island to look for them, but found nothing. Oh, shit. Man, I was through that trailer for the new The Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes looks good. It looks phenomenal. Then all in that island

just being like, do you know there are places outside of here where humans play baseball like we do? They're like, what? What? Yes, yes. They leave it. They make cheese steaks

just like we do on this island. Our island. But out of all the mysterious creatures and creepy cryptids that have been seen in the Bridgewater Triangle, none have reached the infamy of one of Henry's favorites.

The ever-lovable puck wuggies. Man, the puck-widgees are still probably my top-five cryptid. I love them because Top five, how long is your fucking list? Dude, you're monster cryptids! Because I still like, I think Bigfoot's probably still

the number one. You know, Flatwood's monster's sexy. We know that. Yeah. Have you guys seen the lawn of the fan art of the Flatwood's monster? Very sexualized. I also like I like Mothman because no one believes him And then I also like

Well even though we're getting sued over it Have you seen this shit? Yeah Well no just we had to change So you know we're changing Mothman Red Eye blend We're changing it to the butterfly dude's Blue Eye blend

This is gonna be fun I think you guys are gonna like it I was pretty proud of Butterfly dude Yeah I think it's gonna be good Yeah The Mothman people came for us Well the A There's a mothman economy that we did not know we were fucking with.

And then all of a sudden, the mothman people arrive and they're like, you think you can come take our cryptid fucking money? And I was just like, how much is it? They're like, we made $19 last year. And I was just like, well, what are you talking about? There wasn't even West Virginia mothman people. It was Ohio mothman people. Oh, but we now know Ohio's the New Florida.

Oh, my God, man. How much? That's so crazy. They're taking the mothman from us? Yeah. If they really respected the Mothman, they wouldn't take his identity. They put Statue of Liberty on condoms. That's right.

You mean to tell me we're going to allow the Mothman to be taken from us? The statue, is that true? Am I what I just said? What does that? I don't know. I just believe you. I took it as fact. But once you get down, all right, we'll skip this legal conversation.

But then, yeah, then I like the Puck Wudgeys. They're up there because they're representation of my people. I don't think we need a condom. that's like, give us your tired, you're weak. I think some of us do. Yeah, I'll teach you out of read. You're definitely going to be using a lot of huddled masses. The condom for the huddled masses is good.

Are you dirty at the Port Authority? There you go. Oh, I once got offered a blowjob at Port Authority. It was awful. It was sick. A blowjob was awful? Yeah, yeah. It was 6 a.m.

I was waiting near the Ralph Cramden statue. Cab driver walked up to me. So, what are you doing this morning? I'm like, going Washington, D.C. for a show. He's like, do you like movies? I'm like, what kind of movies? The kind of play right over there. You like blowjob?

Yes, right. You like blowjob. Normally, normally, if you were going to ask me. I just told him, I got to bust a cat. She's like, me. And then walk away. You got a feeling it was a numbers game that day. Well, the Puck Waji is described as a hair-covered, three-foot-tall hominid with gray skin, large ears, and long fingers and noses.

Puck Wajiz are mischievous little creatures who can vanish and appear at will. They can shape-shift into animals. They shoot poison arrows. They're prolific arsonists. And they can sometimes lead humans. to their deaths in Hachabak Swamp. Man, it'd be cool. Hang out with a bunch.

That would be the best crew to hang with. They're like whammies. What? Like in a... Press your luck. Yeah. No whammies, no whammies. Whoa, the whammy is the puck wudgy.

It's right. I didn't even think about that. There you go. Let me look that up. Well, the puck wudgy death lure is a light called the Tepay wongas, which are souls of humans they've killed. These human

souls are used to kill more humans which are then ensnared and used to kill even more humans still. The origins of the Pukwaji legend began parallel to the giant Mao Shop, who always made the Pukwajis jealous because he could get along with the Wampanoag people

while every effort the Pukwagi made to help humans backfired. That's why you shouldn't help for people. The number one that don't ask you for it. Don't help them. Don't give you if you don't have extra. Right? And then also, too, man, don't extend yourself for people who won't extend themselves to you. These Pukwajis are wise.

And so, the Pukwajis gave up and decided they would instead play the tormentor to Moushap's role of protector. Now, at first, they were just annoying. So, Moushap collected as many Puck Wachis as he could and scattered them across New England so they wouldn't be as much of a nuisance to humans. Now they work the tolls. Give me a corner of a fucking shit. But when the puck wudgee's returned, they did so with a vengeance. Instead of just hiding shoes or chasing away deer, the puck wudgee showed back up and just plain started murdering people. Started kidnapping children, burning villages.

Dude, where's my puck wudgy movie? Puck widgees versus the cops. Oh, my God. Puck wedgis are cops, man. Oh, puck wedgis versus the chuds, dude. That's a fucking movie. Save it next year, March Madness. In response, Mous Shop sent his five sons

to deal with the now murderous Puck Wachies. But Moushap's sons were lured into tall grass and were shot dead with magic arrows. Enraged, Moushap crushed as many puck wudgies as he could underneath his feet, but many escaped and later regrouped. They tricked Moushop into the water where he drowned, and the Puck Wuchies have ruled the Bridgewater Triangle, ever since.

See, that'd be a cute Pixar movie. Like, I think that's like a fun, dark movie. Yeah. I feel like you're part Pukwaji. Is it the back? Yeah, and the front, unfortunately. Yeah. I mean, I'm not waxing.

I don't care what the polls say. I don't care what the emails from Biden say. I'm not waxing my back. Now, once European colonists arrive and were told of the Puckwaji legend, they believed it wholeheartedly. Except they filtered the story through their own cultural lens and reclassified the Pukwaji as foot soldiers of the devil, the very hand of Satan itself. And hence, the legend lived on in New England amongst the whites for centuries. And there are still people in modern times who have reported encounters with these evil little creatures.

In one example, a paranormal enthusiast named Tim actually had not one, but that's all we know of him. his name was Tim I had a source once deep within the government Tim he told me everything how I could catch the bus thank you Tim

Tim had not one but two encounters with these creatures both in the woods and without one evening as Tim was walking in the woods

Tim was walking he encountered a bright floating light being an enthusiast of the paranormal, he excitedly took out his digital camera and tried taking a snapshot. Oh, fuck. Yeah. I love orbs. Oh, hell yeah. It's an orb. Oh, is that my grandfather? It's an orb. But the orb suddenly disappeared and reappeared 30 feet away off the path in the thicket. You flirt with me there, orb? You flirt with me? I'm Tim. People respect me around here. I give people secrets.

Now, obviously, this is one of the dead souls that I mentioned earlier. Yes. But perhaps unaware of the story of the Puckwoji's leading men to their deaths in the forest, Tim followed the light. All right, there, I'll follow you back to your home, but simply because I'm lonely. Soon enough, though, he sensed that something was wrong. Tim, sensed that something was wrong. Tim always does when something is wrong. But when he returned to the path, he found a two-foot-tall man walking towards.

towards him. Hey, how are you doing? Tim, I don't know about you. Let me ask you a son. You like blow jobs? I do love a blowjure. It is one of my favorite activities outside of looking for the puck watching. Well, Tim ran in the opposite direction.

So the figure turned back into the thicket and disappeared. All right, guess some guy doesn't like blow jobs. I'll go fuck a rabbit. A few years later, Tim was in the parking lot of a grocery store, but we're still quite close to the woods. I see you woods. I'm over here. I'm buying milk. As soon as I'm done, purchasing milk, I'm going to be over inside of you, triangle.

He was in the car waiting for his friend. Weird. Like we had the parking lot conversation the other day. It is kind of strange. Like, just hanging out in a parking lot. Unless you're getting a blowjob and you're in a and you're sitting in a parking lot, that's suspicious. You never go tailgating for nothing? That's called drinking and driving.

You getting pulled over saying, just tail, I'm just a mobile tailgate. And in Massachusetts, they let you go. If you sing the song, they let you go. Well, Tim was in his car waiting for a friend When he saw that the friend was in the grocery store His friend was picking up like milk or something Oh, I thought he was like meeting the friend To go sit with him along with him in the car

I don't know I gave the context clue If he was in the parking lot in front of the grocery store I just assumed he was buying drugs That also happens in the parking lot of the grocery store Not a bad guess I love orbs and cocaine Well, that is when

Tim saw the same small figure in his rearview mirror. Hey, buddy, I knew it fun. I knew you'd sit long enough for me to suck you dick. As the puck watch he stood there, staring, Tim's car turned on by itself, and the radio cranked up to full volume. Sure people have. No reason. So people had. Completely forgetting about his friend, Tim stepped on it and hauled ass out of the parking lot,

fast as he could. As far as I know, that was Tim's last encounter with a puck wudgee. What about the friend in the grocery store? Yeah, what about his buddy? He just comes out out. That puck wudgee sitting there,

you know, I met your buddy, Tim, and he wasn't that in the blowjubs. But I see you've purchased a lot of candy and maybe you might be interested in a blowjah. Give me a milky, a little piece of shit. You know, actually, I could go for a blow shop.

Actually, I'm going through a divorce. I'm going through a divorce with my wife. You little man, you can suck my dick. Come with me to court, support me. In another story, a man named Bill Rousseau was out walking his Rottweiler named Samantha at midnight. As you do.

That is a very fancy name for a Rottweiler. This is Samantha. Yeah, she'll bite your dick off. Well, he did that. every night because he worked the late shift at his job. Yeah. But on that particular night, Bill took a different route and as they walked, Samantha started

quivering and shaking. Then Bill heard a high-pitched wail saying, I want you. I want you. Kee-eat-eat-e-kee-e-e-de. Perfect put-twaggy. Up ahead,

underneath the street light, Bill saw an erect figure. Pudgy indeed. Three feet tall with a pop belly. More like a fuck what you. Walking towards him. Yeah, I don't.

It was also naked, but covered in hair three to four inches long. So obviously you could see his dick and ball. Yeah, yeah, it's true. It's true, but honestly, it's warm out. These are my clothes.

I'm a buckwatchy. Man, that's interesting to think about those. If he has three to four inches of hair, but he could see his dick and balls hanging out. Five or six inch long dick. That's the thing. But for a three-foot tall creature, that is a proportionally

massive cock. It's a fucking demon. Demons do have big dicks. Yeah. Or he could have been older and he's got the long balls. Yeah. That's the thing. You know that Warwick Davis is packing, right? Really? Yeah.

Like, how many? Like, well, packing. How many? But he has, like, penises? No, no. Yeah, he did. He's not bringing him in a case. I'm saying he has a large penis.

Now, how many inches? Oh. Is it like a weird, like, holding dick? How do you know? He told me. Yeah. No, he's just got, like, he's Warwick Davis, but he's got, he's got an Ed Larson on him. Ah, I see.

So it's like a standard. He's got gigantic balls. Yes, he's got a standard penis, but he's small. Good for him. That's how he's working so long. I actually think they would keep you from working. You think so? You're so confident.

Why would you need to act? If you have a huge penis, you should do anything but act. Should be president. Should be a professional baseball player. Anything else? Slide too much in baseball. Wow. Fuck whigies

Now Bill Russo For some reason Thought that perhaps Because of the creature's height This was a hairy child That was his first thought Yeah, just another freak That's a hairy child

Have I ever seen one? Oh my God Go to sleep child's late But As it walked towards him He realized that it was old, and it was speaking to him. It kept repeating over and over again. I want you.

I want you. He was saying, I want you. If you didn't get it. The cadence became more insistent. I want you. I want you. And the creature began beckoning bills. I'm trying to you

I talk to you I don't talk to him I don't talk to you The dog can watch You try to seduce me You hairy child I know you got the hair Of an older man

But your boy Well terrified Both Bill and the dog Turned around They didn't run home They speed walked home Let's get out of here Samantha

This is too good to be true that is the only way I can do a Boston accent I can't do any other variation on it besides just Kennedy but that's great reportedly Bill returned to the spot many times but never saw the creature again if he was so freaked out why would you go back

well you know sometimes you get something kind of scares you at first but then you get curious yes yeah have sex with the small hairy child that's what happened with Father Mike who was my priest but he just never went all the way through with it because I guess I just wasn't forward enough

I can't tell who's the cowardness situation I don't know you're off of me oh you got a problem with a little boy with the body like a man oh is this too much man for a 10 year old for you

Now, the cryptids are all well and good. We need one more ingredient if we want to call the Bridgewater Triangle a semi-permanent full-on flap. We need UFOs. And luckily, the Bridgewater triangle is full of them. I do think of all of the domestic triangles. They do have the most, like, I don't know if you'd say recorded activity, but they have a fucked-on-one. of witness accounts and people talking about like fires on Lake Huckamack.

You know, like, and Lake Nip, they would see these weird like flames and there's a lot of different like, you know, ghost lights. If you do listen to these paranormal investigators, which I do think a lot of it is fueled by grain alcohol, Mountain Dew and math, but they, but their hearts are in the right place.

Yeah, but they're seeing stuff. There's lots of people seeing the same thing, right? Yeah, yeah. For the most part. I mean, there's variations. Okay. Yeah. You could argue that maybe they're just telling the same story to each other. It just gets bigger and bigger each time. And, you know, maybe they just saw some weird shit at night.

Don't ruin the magic. It's the Bridgewater Triangle. Now, the sightings started in the 19th century, but the first notable sighting came in 1908 when two undertakers driving a carriage saw a, quote, unusually bright lantern above the skies on Halloween night. The hottest time for UFO sightings in the Bridgewater Triangle, however, was the 1970s. when seemingly the entire country was awash in both UFO sightings and general paranormal activity. I wonder how this lines up with Mothman, time periods.

About 10 years after. 15. Let's swim on. The most famous Bridgewater UFO sighting occurred in the spring of 1979, when two radio broadcasters, Jerry Lopez, and Steve Sibratia, were on their way to reign of Massachusetts for our night at the dog track. Completely innocent night. A couple radio DJs

going to the fucking dog track in the middle of the night. I can smell that. Just like morning DJs at the night dog track. I don't like to watch a race as much as I like to eat them. That's why I always bet it on the loser.

As they were driving, Steve saw an incredibly bright light just over the tree line and the light only grew larger as it got closer to the car. The two broadcasters stopped the car and watched as a series of bright lights blotted together in the shape of an arrow and passed

overhead, in a formation that was by Steve's guesstimate, the width of five seven forty-seven's wing to wing. Say it properly. Five seven-fourty-sevens. Wang to wang. Jerry, however, remembered

it being shaped like a baseball home plate with a series of lights on it, and something like a cord was dangling from the craft shooting off sparks. But they both said it was so close that they could throw a rock and hit it. That was not the only, the other case that we covered with shitting UFOs was the Bigfoot UFO flap in Pennsylvania. Oh, yeah, the Pennsylvania Bigfoot flap in 1973. Yeah.

I remember that one. The craft didn't. I just was like, mark it. Remember it? Shooting UFO. Good work, Henry. Locked. Memory.

Well, the craft then continued hovering over a field for a minute, then took off. And over the course of the next week, there were a series of sightings reported by other people in newspaper and radio stories. And it was only then that Jerry and Steve came forward with their own account. One of the strangest UFO stories out of Bridgewater, however, came in 2013 with a man named Jim Andre. Jim said he was on his computer at 9.15 p.m. when he suddenly blacked out. And when he woke up, he was in the same chair, but five. hours had gone by. You mean every time I'm in a hotel?

Oh, he took literally how a nap? A nap. I took a nap and it's scared. It's got to be you opposed. This is an extension of somebody's why they missed a bar mitzvah. They missed something big. He stood up and tried

gathering his thoughts when he noticed an intense burning sensation on his right forearm. When he looked down, he saw a tattoo that resembled an Aryan gray, which is a hybrid I'm not familiar with. Has anyone heard of the white power parrot called the Aryan gray?

What is the Aryan gray? I tried Googling it, too. Is it a Nazi alien? I've never heard of a bird? A bird? The African gray. No, not a bird, like a gray alien. Not like a fucking parrot, you idiot.

We're talking about you. I went alien. You went bird. I went bird. I thought that that was like an Aryan grain. I thought it was like a bird that you could teach the Zig Isle. Like I thought it was like a parent that lived forever. You thought that a guy got abducted by a UFO and he woke up with

a bird tattoo? Literally that's what I read. I thought I was like, oh, he must have some. That's why I thought, oh that that's super wheel. I'd be like, that's fucking crazy. It's like the plot of margarita film. Just as crazy is the aliens tattooing themselves

because number one, that's revealing who did it. Mystery's gone. If only they did it to John Biday-Ramsey, we'd know what happened to her. That's just the truth. He's just like, oh, who did this to me?

Yeah. Oh, I see you right there. It's this racist bird? But the thing about the tattoo is that it wasn't bleeding as tattoos usually do immediately after they're done and it didn't heal like a regular tattoo. It blistered when it healed.

And his skin peeled like a sunburn. a brand yeah and to this day jim is convinced that he was abducted and for some reason tattooed by aliens that night does he continue to have the tattoo i don't know i don't have his fucking number yeah he was tagged yeah like yeah like when we catch in it yeah we catch a fucking bear we put a thing in it's here it's the same thing yeah but normally they don't have like somebody from brooklyn and they're doing like stick and poke tattoos most of the time it's like a weird indiscriminate piece of metal that's put in the back behind your nose or It's like put in your knee cap or put inside of your, like, your tit flesh, where it's like, this guy, it's true.

Yeah. But the, I'm looking at Jim Andre, racist bird tits. When you say an Aryan gray, you mean an entirely white gray? No, I mean an Aryan mixed with a gray alien. It's, yeah, it's an alien with a swastika on its forehead. Whoa, Charles Mason. Like a, I guess it would be more like a Nordic gray. Yes.

Does that make more sense to you? Thank you. Now, there's a lot of oaky, spooky stuff going on in the Bridgewater Triangle. Granted, but there's also an inordinate amount of murder, and in the triangle, it tends to have an occult edge, or so they say. Now, we here all know that the satanic panic was just that. It was a moral panic, and the massive coordinated groups of so-called devil worshippers who impregnated women just so they could sacrifice the babies didn't really exist. But that doesn't mean... That's what I was looking to apply to next.

That was going to be my retirement. But that doesn't mean that there weren't killers who used the concept of Satan to give their murder a bit of kick, guys like Richard Ramirez. In that same vein, you had a guy named Carl Drew, who was a Massachusetts pimp and self-identified Satanist. It was said by witnesses that Carl Drew entraped sex workers and held. held them in his thrall by involving them in satanic cult activities and threatening violence, possibly sacrifice, if they rejected his so-called protection. All right, my sex workers for Satan, that I have brought from various locations across the country to hang out in my living room, we're going to play cranium.

And we are going to get to the end of cranium, or I will murder you. well in confessions that were in all probability coerced but still a good story anyway these women said that karl drew made them watch as he performed ritualistic human sacrifices in a log cabin in freetown state forest you know what he called the log cabin what carl drew's cabin wow man evil as hell what happens in there supposedly one of the sex workers robin murphy shifted from observer to participant And that's when another sex worker, a woman named Karen Mardson, went to the police. She called Carl the devil and said that she expected there to be consequences for going to the cops.

And indeed there were, as Karen Mardson was murdered and supposedly sacrificed on February 8, 1980. Who knows if the ritual part is true, but the forensics did tell the story of a brutal murder. There's something about a man with a mullet calling himself a Satanist in the middle of Massachusetts. that I just don't believe them. And they always kind of say that. It's always like a guy

who kind of looks like Carl from Aquitine who's just like, you know, Mike Warren Key kind of has the, I used to be a Satanist, but you know, now I'm different. But it's like,

if you've seen Satanus, this is the crowd of Satanus. Like, they look like this. No, this crowd is far too attractive to be Satanus. Hey! Hey, you see, there were some

disappointed frowns. There are people, you guys look a... Well, Marsden's hair and fingernails were pulled out, her head was beaten with stones, and she was finally killed when Carl snapped her neck. Once she was dead, Carl allegedly persuaded Robin Murphy to slit Marsden's throat. Carl then removed the head, and observers said that they kicked it around like a soccer

ball. Finally, Carl had sex with the headless corpse, carved an X on its chest, and smeared Karen's blood on Robin's forehead. Does it hit differently when you get to look me in the eyes when I say this shit. I told you all, we should have played cranium. They did play cranium. Oh my God, I forgot. One more round of cranium. But before Marsden's mutilated

body was even found, Robin confessed to the police and fingered Carl for both that murder and one before. You guys all giggled at finger. You all giggled at it. I was being mature. It was a test to see how many people like, yeah, I do it all the time. Like when I say titular, to see if he giggles.

Of course. And he always does. A 69ed Carl for the murder. Well, others testified that they were present at the murders or were told about the murders by Robin or Carl. But all have recanted their testimony in the decades since, saying that their testimonies were coerced. And besides that fact, they were all. on a lot of drugs at the time, so maybe the memories weren't all that. We're on

crazy drugs. Iburopin. I took and a leave and I killed those women. I don't remember. But even if all the satanic ritual sacrifice stuff was embellished or completely fabricated, which it probably was, it was

with these murders that the satanic panic officially began in America, making the Bridgewater Triangle, it's unholy birthplace. All of this dumb shit really does have wild consequences. Like something happens like that is

legitimately like it created a panic. It ruined hundreds of people's lives and it came from that shithead. Yeah, they really did. And it just came from people paying attention to the fucking Bridgewater Triangle. We should have been hunting for buck wudgeys. Everybody that was in there killing people

they would have so much more fun hanging out with and looking for puck wudgeys. Well, staying in the realm. That's scary child. Staying in the realm of reality, we spoke extensively on our original series about Taunton State Hospital, which is a mental asylum that also sometimes housed the criminally insane. And it's located smack dab in the middle of the Bridgewater Triangle. Built in 1853, Taunton was state-of-the-art for its time.

Its 40 buildings had running water, a sewer system, central heat, and full ventilation. Wow. Yeah. So it must have been a really nice place for all the... people inside of it? Kind of? At times when they weren't getting, you know,

plunged and ice baths to try to shock them out of their mental illness. Honestly, I could use it. I could do that to you today. Let's try it. Come over. Come on. Let's fix me. So this attention to what we now consider basic human rights came from progressive

Quaker policies in which the mentally ill were no longer just chained to a wall and left alone as they had been for centuries and centuries. They did, however, do lobotomies galore throughout the 20th century. Now, some of the patients at Taunton had genuine mental illness, but some were there simply because they were promiscuous, outspoken, poorly socialized, or they masturbated to the point where it was a noticeable problem.

How do they lock up half of Massachusetts? Take a lap! Take a lap! Yep, for that, you get claps, not laugh. But the most famous resident of Taunton was a woman or Taunton Mental Hospital. Totton was a woman who... No, I'm going to say Tauntoin. Yeah, say Toin.

Yeah, at this point. The famous famous resident of Toonton was a woman who absolutely deserved to be there. She has one of the highest body counts of any American female serial killer that we know. of 31 people and her name was Jane Topan reportedly Topan fondled her victims as they died in an attempt to see

the inner workings of their souls through their eyes which women are fucked up I didn't know that about Syria Keller obviously men do horrible things but it's actually nice to hear yeah a woman fondles the soul

on the corpse yeah the last guy we talked about caught off a woman's hadn't fucked the corpse and you're getting weirded out by a woman going you know what's funny is that like pinch into fucking cheeks and you're like women are weird it's because if I met Carl and he said he did all that I unfortunately

I'd be like seen it buddy yeah people do it all the time yeah been there done that but with this this makes you feel icky no it's fun yeah okay I'm just saying it's great for women it's representation yeah you have a theory you stick to it yeah and unlike many female serial killers she

admitted to experiencing a sexual thrill from watching patients be near death, recovering, and finally dying, which is pretty much edging. But with murder. Yeah. In one case,

Topan poisoned a family's housekeeper, so it would appear that the housekeeper was drunk. Topan's plan was to get the housekeeper fired and take her place. And when the plan worked, Topan moved in and killed the whole family. Holy shit. How have I never heard of Jane Topan before?

God, I don't know. We should do this. Yeah, we're going to. This is a big episode. Yeah, we're going to do Jane Topan. We're going to do the satanic murders that we talked about earlier. I got like four episodes from doing this bullshit. That's awesome.

Yeah. Well, Topan died in Taunton at the incredible age of 84. Wow. They always last soul. long. Yeah. She beat out Ed Gein's life in a mental hospital by seven years. And he loved the mental hospital.

He loved it. Yeah. Yeah, he was 77, but, you know, women live longer. Less stress. Now, like many mental hospitals in America, Taunton closed down the asylum wing in 1978. Now, all do you go out into the triangle? Get out there, you're crazy?

Enjoy the woods. But it continued to be. used by the state to house juvenile delinquents and more recently recovering substance abusers. But considering how it was indeed an insane asylum, it's just as haunted as any other insane asylum. And it has the added bonus of rumored satanic cult activity due to its location in the Bridgewater Triangle. See, it was rumored that the hospital was actually closed because the staff were taking incapacitated patients into the basement to conduct satanic rituals. And several patients were sacrificed when the devil would appear.

No, I'm not here. I'm just here for COVID. No, please don't. I'm not crazy. You go on the slab. Hey. Is my friend, he's watching? I mean, this isn't completely outside of the realm of possibility.

Fucking Jimmy Saville did this in the UK all the time. It's real. Reportedly, there's still bizarre demonic markings on the basement walls. Yeah, I think about, we do have to do Jimmy Saville at some point. We don't have to do anything. He used to sleep in the morgue with all the bodies, and then he would go and he would, ah, God, and he would shower at the hospital. Like, he'd stop just to go shower at the hospital with the small hairy children.

Mm-hmm. He's an idea, man. He, a bad idea, man. He did have a lot of ideas. Yeah. a lot of energy when you ever see somebody that old still jogging

think about it be like what are your other hobbies what are you trying to keep what you need all this stamina for one staff member said that as he stood on the last step of the staircase before entering the basement he was hit by an incredibly vivid

vision of devil worship complete with auditory hallucinations of drums and chanting along with the smell of smoke the vision stopped as soon as he stepped back and he quit Taunton the next day. Staff members have also said that they've seen an apparition

that they call the smoky man. He's a little over five feet tall and consists of a smoky hazy cloud in the shape of a man. He's the smoky man. It's all we got on. Have you met that smoky man? He's the weed dealer

for the puck wedgies. Others experience something they call the Shadow Man, who sometimes appears as, you know. What? Shadow. Oh, it's a shadow man. And sometimes he appears fully formed. Consistently, though, the apparition is described as definitely a man.

It's a man. But his face is obscured, and he always appears in the corner of a residence room and stares directly at the terrified patient. Why don't you sleep? Go to sleep. go the fuck to sleep I can't do what I'm going to do I'm so many things I want to do

together for sleep and so just keeps passing through I just want to fondle and touch you I'm just a shadow man and so considering how there are actually many stories that I didn't even talk about in this update

yeah dude so many There's a lot of shit in this triangle. It's likely that the activity in the Bridgewater Triangle will continue for as long as people inhabit the state of Massachusetts. Thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen. We did it. Yes. Wow. This is the first time we've ever done a straight-up live podcast like this.

And I think we did fine. We did fine. No, seriously, we've never done a live podcast like this ever. I feel like nude. Yeah. I normally choose to be nude. on stage, but I feel like when Natalie sees me try to get in the

tub, like that kind of nude. Yeah. Yeah. Like, which is a too nude. You know, you did naked comedy before. I know, but it's... And the same guy kept showing up every week. Yeah, yeah. I remember that. You just sat like that. Honestly, I love a fan. Yeah.

You know? I've seen you naked on stage a couple dozen times. But it's weird. It's weird. It's what I'm using my body as a weapon. I don't feel nearly as vulnerable as this. Yeah, I know. This is weird. I'm going to go home and take a shower. Yeah, I feel like, but it's nice, though. I'm glad you here. I trust you all. Yeah.

I trust you all, and I'm glad that you were here for this. Yeah, I can tell by your t-shirts. You're all right. And if you're listening to this in your car right now, I'm sorry you didn't have any fun today. I'm sorry that you got a live podcast episode, and you probably were like, oh, you know, because you're going to be mad.

Right, about getting it. Just get some fucking ice cream and get over it. Yeah, man. Go buy some bullets and think about how you want to use them. I said ice cream. But I didn't say it again. I just said bullets because what's nice about is that you can just that, you can think, and you can write names and ideas on the bullets.

You need a good pen though. Yes, you need a Sharpie. Yeah. Yeah, thick Sharpie. Because then to me, sometimes I just get it out of my system and then I take those bullets and I throw it out in the trash can in front of the middle school. Just because, again, it's just so they, it's. out of my hands.

Investigate him. Not me. I'm going to go right down the middle and say, just go home and masturbate. Good night. Ladies and gentlemen, thank you so much. You're all angels in disguise. Hell Satan.

Yeah. And now we come to the point where I believe we exit first. Goodbye. See you later, everybody. Yes, as we walk through you, we walk through this crowd. Oh, do we do we need to do like

plugs and stuff. Do we have to go like, hey, well, you've just listened to the last podcast stuff? Do we have to do like that we do it on the show? Nah. We got our bosses here. Do you have to go like, and yeah, you can see more like it. Go to www.com.com slash podcast and left. You want to see us, do

this shit live. If you want to go see us live, go to last podcast on the left.com to go see all of our live dates. And if you want to follow us on Instagram or TikTok, go to LP on the left. Thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen. Good night. Yes. Thank you.