Last Podcast On The Left - Relaxed Fit: The 4th Annual* Last Podcast On the Left March Madness of Murder

Episode Date: March 21, 2025

The time has come once again... for Last Podcast on the Left's ANNUAL March Madness of Murder! And this year... We got a WILDCARD! ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN!Killers from all around the Last Pod-Universe, both Fictional and Real-Life go head to head - and only ONE will survive! For Shows, Merch, and More Visit: LastPodcastOnTheLeft.comKevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Last Podcast on the Left ad-free and a whole week early. Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus.

There's no place to escape to. This is the last time. On the left. That's when the cannibalism started. What was that? Ladies and gentlemen, are you ready? Are you prepared for the madness and mayhem? Welcome to last podcast on the left. And we are here at the depends adult diapers for men center outside of downtown Croatia. And it is a beautiful day for a fight. Isn't it Marcus?

That's right. This is the fourth annual last podcast on the left. March madness of murder and mayhem. This year we've got a damn good surprise for everybody. This year it's going to be an old wild card edition. That's right, man. We got the brass whirrs pumping. We got the popcorn popping and we got the crack in the light bulb. That's right. We are having a time here in Croatia. I hope everybody's enjoying their hot dog made from real dog. It is one of the essential delights here in downtown Croatia. And do you think that we got a stern wind coming out of the Northeast about 45 miles per hour? Do you think that will affect the gameplay today folks? about 45 miles per hour. Do you think that will affect the gameplay today, folks? Yeah!

Yeah! Well, we'll have to get the, that's one contestant off the rankings. All right, here we go. Goodbye, Mitch McConnell. Unfortunately, we forgot that in Croatia, the wind blows with powdered glass. Yes, it's actually a perfect environment and I feel, these contestants, some of these people have never been in a physical fight. Absolutely not.

Some of them have been in so many fights fights you would consider them to be the most dangerous person around, but that's why we bring them in here today. Isn't that correct? We are doing it in an all dirt field. That's right. And here on the Wild Card Edition, I know in previous years on the March Madness of Mayhem and Murder, we've done half fictional and half real, but this year we only got a couple of fictional people in there because this is a wild card edition.

I'm very, very excited to see how this shakes out and I am filled to the brim. Thank you to Ben. I have blood in my diaper. Oh, you might want to get that checked out of it. Nah. I like your capillary attitude. Welcome to the last podcast on the left ladies and gentlemen. I'm Marcus Parks.

Hey, I'm your commentator Andrew Zubowski and I'll tell you my wife's gonna divorce me because I'm too good of a husband. And of course Ed Larson. How you doing folks? I'm just here to have the ham and make sure the whale stays in. I actually did forget I was gonna bring prosciutto today. I forgot it. Well tomorrow is another day. Yeah, let me ask you. Am I bleeding right now? No, okay good No, it tastes like blood. Hey, that's just

That's just your mouth. Yeah, no. Well, yeah, I got a cold sore and then when I was doing my announcer voice it ripped open It's a cold sore but it looks Wow. It's a cold sore, but it looks hot. Yeah. Yeah. Oh yeah. Apply your sports bandage. Very good. Yes. Rob has handed me our sports bandages, the AKA paper towels. The quicker that way picker-upper that way. I won't be self-conscious about bleeding from my mouth.

We're saying thank you to our big, our sponsors over at brawny. They could absorb, you know, that just one square of brawny can absorb up to four ounces of infant blood. And that's why brawny is the number one paper towel of abortionists everywhere. That's right. You know, tampon, no problem. Jam yourself up full of brawny. And I also wouldn't mind getting a sponsorship from or a gel because I am quite open about cold sore use and cold sore, you know, suffering maintenance maintenance. So yeah, just or a gel. If you need a sponsor, if you need a pretty face, hit me up. But it ain't too pretty cause it's got a cold sore.

He earned it though. Yeah, I did. Yeah, I did earn it. You'll take a paste or a jail, please. But yes, here on the March madness of murder and mayhem, this is our fourth one. And what we're going to be doing today is we're going to be picking 16 fighters out of our cup of champions. Oh, here we go. Yeah, do you want to let's start it? Let's get our first round. Let's get our first round. And of course, we got the Eastern Conference in the Western Conference That's right. So yes, and that's the far East in the far west far East far far west Yeah, all right. So let's start with the Eastern Conference We're gonna go through all the Eastern Conference first round first and then we're going to go through the Western conference first round after that. Nothing makes me happier.

Marcus, let's get into the mayhem. So our first contestant today is five Mars attacks. Aliens. You know, they are from another planet and they are hostile because they don't understand birds. Do not run. We are here to protect you. And if you remember anything from the third annual March madness that we did, we don't know anything

about birds either. I sent 10,000. We're not going to litigate the bird matter. Joe's a new way of doing the content. Yeah. The bird matters closed. We can't revisit the bird matter has been decided. of doing the content. Yeah. The bird matters closed. We can't revisit the bird. It has been decided ever since this what's happened. The price of eggs through the roof. It is again. That's eggs. Not birds. They came first. Birds have eggs. And who is fighting? Mark five Mars attacks aliens. Let's see here. It is Marjorie Taylor green from, I believe it is Missouri. This big thick old bitch is ready for a fight. All right. So how's this fight? So we're doing this in a dirt field. Oh, I see all these legal aliens coming down trying to fight.

You gotta take a good spot from an American warrior. And I will not allow it. I will face them in Squarisee. They literally have Jewish space lasers. That is the problem. They are manufactured by some of the finest Jewish laser companies in all of the world. Like if anybody's seen a blitter esteem, one of the best destruction laser companies out there, thank you for your sponsorship.

So I'm thinking that, okay, so with the Mars attacks aliens, do they have the space lasers or are they hand to hand here? I think that they have laser guns. There's no way these aliens fight fair first of all. Yeah, we know that. But Marjorie Taylor Greene is shielded by the Constitution. And what you guys don't understand is that the Constitution can absorb, I believe up to the watts of a neutron bomb.

I'm trying to think what the Constitution can save three blasts. I mean forget that. I mean just that also her thick skin. Oh no, she's got, if you did a roll on her, I did a roll for her Constitution. It's 18. She has the skin like a rhino. She is, it's as thick. It can take most trapnil and it can take quite a bit but no direct per, you can kill her with a bazooka. I'm pretty sure her mother was an armadillo. Yes.

Yes. But I do think that the Mars attacks aliens. They're clever. That's the thing about it is that they're very clever and Marjorie Taylor green is not very bright. No, no. But what she lags for and in mental strength, she makes up for in strength of body and frame. She's a tank.

Yeah. She is my full-on bruiser She's my number one woman out there ready to fuck shit up within a three feet circle of her arms That's true, but the Mars attack the Mars attacks aliens do have the range though. They do and they also There's five of them. Yeah. They'll surround her. They can handle me. What I'll do is I got ripped my dress off, tied around my head, keep my hair out of my eyes. All I got is my studded bra and my field panties. And I'm ready to take these aliens down one knuckle sandwich at a time. You come for me, you little Martians. You can't handle truth. Now do you think, well, first of all, are they fighting now or are we going through the entire, is this, is this fight

currently happening? This fight's currently happening. Okay. I just wanted to make sure I knew it was happening. I don't think she stands a chance against five Mars attacks. Ali, I don't think so either, but I do think in the fight she can get, you get three a hole right because let's all right Let's put it this way set it up attacks Aliens land right we're gonna have the setup of the fight Marjorie Taylor green She rolls out of like I've usually like the you know the gladiator when the big gates rise up She's coming out. She's been fighting other smaller men warming up for fucking an hour, right?

Another smaller men warming up for fucking an hour right? Yeah, they're just in there like oh, yeah, mr. Buda judge I'm gonna take you down. She's down there working on Pete Buda judge getting herself warmed up She comes out right sees them aliens at first. I think she's gonna do a sexual affront. Mm-hmm Yeah, and do uh, you don't know if you could handle this much American woman Whether or not they would respond well. Yeah, yeah, you see this here? Oh yeah, you're the hottest baby I've ever seen. I want to slip your entire body inside of me. But the Mars attacks aliens, as we know, are not swayed by female or human sexuality in

any way whatsoever. But I think she can get close to one or two of them. How? with her hands Gotta have a gun on her Yes, she's wondering her pussy. Yeah Dillinger in her pussy But I believe that traditional firearms were not that effective against the Mars attacks alien No, as we know, it's only that one song. It's just that one song

Yeah, and I don't think Marjorie Taylor Greene listens to music that good. Just not watch Tim Burton films. Plus she's going to spend half of the time telling the Mars Attacks aliens that they never attacked Earth and killed anybody in the first place. Yes, exactly. She's on their side and she kind of wishes she could join them. But in the end they don't have any team. So I think unfortunately they do rise above her floating.

I still think she could take out one. Oh, of course. She's taking out one Yeah, they're gonna sacrifice one in order to sneak up behind her and take her down she's definitely zapped into a skeleton Yeah, she's definitely I actually see it more like the sort of situation where they have to like surround a massive elephant and like five people have to like shoot. It has to be like, Oh, you can't defeat the green. Yeah. Her hair doesn't disintegrate.

It just sits on top of the skeleton. That is all that is left is her tits and hair. All right. So round one, the The Mars attacks aliens take it What a satisfying conflict All right, so round two we have Joseph Fritzl with his with his grandfather's Luger Luger. So yeah, he does have, Speaker 4 So what age of Joseph Fritzel are we hitting here? No, 85 year old Joseph Fritzel,

but he's got his grandfather's Luger. And he's out of prison. And he's out of prison. Okay. And that he's going to be going up against a mood, dang the hippo strapped to a Boston dynamic song. Well, I mean, if he's able to lure them in a basement and shut that door, who knows what's going to happen. So I kind of want to talk about this choice. So this is Henry's choice. Obviously this is Henry's choice. Shut that door who knows what's gonna happen Choice obviously, this is Henry's choice is the spiritual center of this team. Yeah. Yeah I'm gonna sure hip-hop a lot of the fight and he's going Right cuz everyone's joking about mooding being wet and grumpy which is why he's been antagonist, right? Yeah, but then he's strapped to a giant Boston dynamic dog

He's an antagonist right yeah, but then he's strapped to a giant Boston Dynamic dog Now I do think that I think that the Boston Dynamic dog slows moodang down No, absolutely not moodang is small enough to be cradled inside of it. It is a two-year-old hippopotamus at this point The size of moodang this is what it was a child this is now No, it's not new moodangody is a full grown hippopotamus. No, it's not yet. Right now I'm using baby moodang. But you have to say it's baby moodang. It's baby moodang at the height of its popularity. Yeah. Meme level moodang. Yeah. And he's inside of his Boston Dynamic dog Joseph Ritzel obviously he Is inside the dog

I think that's unfair. I think that moodang should be strapped on top of the dog kind of mean Yeah, yeah, essentially the belt attached to it Yeah, yeah a leather belt I think that you could see this thing revving up Joseph Ritzel's bound to a chair You can barely walk or he's got a huger Luger up being like I've the one thing I learned all my time of being a father is patience Yeah, and he sits me waits and moodang they load him up, right? He comes see you see you see you see you see you comes out. We decide whether or not at first moodang He's too cute. He likes the attention. Yeah, right. So everybody's applauding moodang Everyone's like yay moodang? And so the legs are going

It's like dancing for the crowd and everyone's like oh And it's like going And the audience loves it they're falling apart right? You know, so Fritzl's not remotely Like he's not fazed at all. No, he had sex with his own daughter too much. He's he can't deal with being Yeah, he's just gonna pull out his gun and shoot Moudang in the head. Exactly. Yeah. He has one shot. He's going to throw like a battery down a staircase and the dogs are to go after it. Shut the door. He, you know, so Fritzel knows to wait for his moment at the very top of moodang working it's it's crowd pleasing engagement because

it must because it's driven by ad dollars. Yeah. Joseph Fritz will shoots it in the head and that leads the Boston dynamic dog to be the leaderless. But I do think that Joseph Fritzel he's an old man. I don't know what his marksmanship skills are like. So I think he's going to wait until the Bostonics dog with moodang strapped on top Charges him you wait to do you wait to the random? Wait until he charges him and so he's gonna shoot moodang right before the Boston Dynamic dogs But that's the thing the Boston Dynamics dog is gonna collide with the old man Well now you're so fritzl is been knocked out of his wheelchair. So now it's Yosef Ritzel second round unfortunately on his feet. Yes

Yeah, he's on his feet. He's definitely on his feet and he's a little batter because that's what we got to remember That's what the rules that we put in last year is that you do go in come you do go into the next round with the Injuries that you sustained in the round before so for example, we have only four Mars attacks aliens left. Yes, exactly. And now it's Joseph Fritzl has been removed because he obviously was in a rascal. But I also think that once Moudang is dead and the dog has this fucking stupid weight off its back of a hippopotamus, it will be a much more fierce fighter and will kill Joseph Fritzl while he's laying on the ground. I just stop him. The death. It loses the mood. Dang is the driving force. Yeah. Moody is the driving force. I think after he kills Moody Fritzl gains control of the Boston dynamic

stuff. Yeah. So now it's your writing a Boston dynamic stuff. Yeah. Yeah, but he loses the gun because he only had one bullet in it Yeah, yeah, so it shot me so surprised when it actually worked Okay, I was never supposed to last this long All right next round wow, this is great. Yeah, it's really our best work Yeah, really is the best stuff we do ten fully armed Australian lyricans Lyricans they write those are the rambunctious children that built the entire criminal network of Australia and a fully armed lyrican has a garbage pail Body right it's garbage pail armor with tolls cut out of the side of it with the hand sticking out of it with

Kelly armor. Yes. Yeah trash can land head hat and each one has a armed slingshot Yeah, with how many with a bunch of rocks? Yes a lot. I mean a nearly unlimited supply of Australia. There's rocks everywhere Yeah, it's a rock heavy city or a country. They're children though. They're Fearless by children. We mean what 13 14? I would say yeah 8 to 13 8 to 8 to 13 in Australia your child into your 13 You're immediately a man as soon as you hit 14 and then adult man and then at 18 you're a crocodile So we got 10 fully armed Australian Lerikans versus oh It's gonna be child versus child we have yawn pilgrim the cabin boy It's gonna be child versus child. We have Jan Pelgrim, the cabin boy from the Batavia, the insane cabin boy.

This fight could have actually happened. Yeah, it's so close. It really could have. This is a regional battle here. That's where he came from. Off the coast of Australia versus the Australians themselves. All right, now we know he's supposed to be impressed by ya. You know he's supposed to be a great green daddy of some sort, some kind.

But the rest of us don't care. Because we hate old people. We want 10 yin, we're telling you to go, 10 yin. And I'm gonna put Jan Pelgrim. I'm not gonna do Jan Pelgrim as he was, which, you know, of course he was back then too weak to strangle anybody, too weak to kill anybody. I'm doing Jan Pelgrim as he saw himself. Oh, yeah Boy, they're young pilgrim self-image. I'm a boy that was born to kill other boys I'll do it

Discriminately one of the chances that they just joined forces and decide that they're like he he's the 11th Lerkin. Good. Very good. Well, this is the problem. Very, very good. Did we understand this at first when we put together this list? Because I think that there is no way they stay separate. Yeah. I think that the Lerkin see him and say, Oh my God, we're on the same team. Why fight when we can kiss? Yeah. Let's go take this whole fucking thing. They can't wait to fight the Mars and the Mars aliens fucking that's all they want to do. It's all a Lerkin ever wanted ever was to fight a Martian. I think that this is a, I feel like they're just going to become buddies. He's a follower, you know,

Lerkin. I don't know. I think young pilgrim becomes the leader Oh young pilgrim as his like self-image like cuz young pilgrim you gotta remember He's 17 and he did talk people into killing he did he yeah. Oh, yeah Yeah, he definitely gubs in they're about to fight and Lerikans all sit They kind of measure each other up all of a sudden. They're looking at each other's slingshots and they're like, it's a nice slingshot and they're looking at each other's slingshots and they're like, it's a nice slingshot. Right? He's just like,

yeah, it is, right? It's fucking awesome. I can have a bunch of people with it. I've killed people. Multiple grown men. I've got a dull knife. It barely works, but you can slap people with it. You know, a lot of us,

we never really got a chance to kill grown men yet. Right? Most of you just harass people and pretend to be ghosts. As long as it's got a point on it It can go in the eye All right, so it's gonna be the best Australian garage rock band ever yawn and the Lyricans That is a team that you we didn't know that it could happen like this All right, defying reality

This is better than the actual March Madness. Madness because this can't happen amongst basketball teams Yeah, do you think people have this sort of passion talking about like Duke versus Syracuse? No unless they got money, right? Yeah, yeah, all right. I'm the same we want to say thank you to the various gambling apps that work here You can actually submit a bet in for one of for one one of these for our March madness right now on your rocket money. I think it's on better sleep. Yeah. Better sleep. Yeah. All right. So this is the last round in the prelims or prelims, but like the last round in the first round Eastern conference, Ooh, we've got Al Gada the 9-eleven Gator

Killed the old man when he was expecting at least on 9-eleven. Mm-hmm. That's right Just a beautiful Tuesday member was shot in the head by a cop Yeah, that is true and we have can be killed. Yeah alligator the 9-eleven Gator versus Lorne Michaels We shall see shall we I don't know if he's ready for the main show or not We don't take what I'll get actually take I appreciate that. I guess we're we really don't do puns anymore, but I know that on 9-eleven. He saw that immediately started producing Know that on 9-eleven he saw that immediately started producing By 9-eleven I can't wait for the sketch this will inspire

One of my favorite days 9-eleven because I got to get to work very easily So things at 40 rock 30 rock is actually quite far far quite far from the world trade at a perfect distance for me To enjoy it from as he have his security team. Yeah, he has a phalanx of assistance Yeah phalanx. Oh, it should be how many how many is in a phalanx five? I saw when I saw him in real life. He was surrounded by five blonde ladies on phones, and he did nothing Yeah, and isn't there always like a child who like a boy who follows him with popcorn? No, I wish. No, I heard about that. I never saw that.

That is one thing I remember reading that in the live at the book, the oral history of Saturday Night Live. Yes. Is that he quit smoking like many years ago. And so now he like constantly eats popcorn. And so there's somebody that's always around him that makes sure that there's never like a bowl of popcorn. It's kind of like Ronald Reagan with his jelly beans. That's another substantiated rumor about me.

How many times people make up incredible things. I'm seven feet tall. Well, if you remember Al Gada went for the man's terrier and then the man got in the way and got killed and had his leg ripped off by Al Gada. Now the popcorn boy could be the thing that fucking entices Al Gada to come out of the swamp and go after the boy and then Warren would be so upset that his popcorn boy is being attacked.

He would then jump in to save his popcorn not the boy and then Al Gada could Rip his legs off Absolutely, I'm just gonna say foot alligator. Yeah, he's a big alligator and Laura Michaels is a dainty old man Yes for my own he's a television producer. Yes, I'll gate Absolutely massacres Lord Michael Obviously he stages it all to be like let's see how he does in the test And so they bring Al Gada is in the waiting room for that 8h 2x4 slapping together

Michael's been like can he do an impression of be long musk Goes towards the stage and then meanwhile, meanwhile, like Lord Michael, you know, cause they don't laugh. Al Gada goes up there. He does a couple of things. He can't stand bombing. No. Oh, but, or loves it. And then he just rips his, he jumps off the fucking stage through the writer's staff and beats and just absolutely decimates. Yeah, Lauren Michaels didn't do his homework and he tried to zigzag instead of just run straight Yeah, and I guess I should have seen his audition now for the next round does al Gata Merely kill Lauren Michaels or does he eat him alive?

Cuz that's gonna have a lot of bearing on how Al Gata does he kills them well in the gonna have a lot of bearing on how alligator does he kills them well in the one fight we knew he just ripped the guy's leg off and then see the thing is with alligators when they kill somebody they put they drag them under the water and they let them sit there under a rock until they get mushy and then they come back and eat them. Got you. Water farm already mushy. I'm thinking that if there are the assistants around alligator is gonna get chased off So Algate is not gonna so Algate is still gonna be hungry going in the next fight. Oh, yeah He's ready to go. I will have Lauren's leg in his mouth. Yeah, he ripped. He ripped him open He read Lauren opens and he's like, oh no

Mmm, I guess we'll have to see what the critics say All right, so that is moving on So our Eastern conference round two is going to be for Mars attacks aliens versus Yosef Fritzl on a Boston Dynamics dog and Jan and the Lerikans versus a still hungry Al Gada. So let's move over to the Western conference to see what our first round is going to be to the Lerkins also higher Al Qaeda. Hey, we've got to get to it. We'll get to it. We don't know what's going to happen.

We don't know what's going to happen. So first round is Benicio del Toro as the Wolfman. Now Henry has stipulations here. All right. So it's Benicio del Toro. Now what do we know from the Kruger's door murders and our crew over there is that he is absolutely in real life a werewolf But Benicio del Toro is not fully aware of this our competition takes place and kicks off right? We've been fighting for hours Yeah, so let's say we hit a kickoff at 330. Yeah first fight first fights at 330 Yes, that's right. So Benicio del Toro is a wolf

man. Yeah. And it's about whether or not we get to the nighttime. Cause if you're getting to the nighttime, you're going to be either fighting Benicio del Toro, the actor or him transformed into a werewolf. I say two fights an hour. So right now we're at about 630 p.m. Oh, it's about to turn It depends on how long the fight is. Let's see who he's versus. Yes Moon is March 14th Well, what's all right? Today's March. What time does the moon rise? That's what we really have to look at is what time does the moon rise to 55 a.m. Well, that's what it's at. It's Eastern Standard Time. That's the next full moon. Yeah. Yeah, I guess that's when it's fully full

Because it is a werewolf turn Wow When the moon is fully full the move the werewolf turns when the moon is fully full It's not just that night. No, it's the moon has to be fully full All right. Well, then that's Benicio del Toro the actor Yeah, it's not there no you would have made to the end of this bracket Yeah, we might have been able to say this if he was the very last card pulled. Yeah Right now as it stands, it's Benicio del Toro in Wolfman maker. He's also pretty bad. He is.

He is. But that's the thing is that Benicio del Toro did enter into this tournament knowing that this could happen. He rolled the dice and he lost. He took the payout. Yeah, he did take the payout. He took the money. Well, let's see if it's his widow that's going to get the money in the end because Benicio

del Toro is going up against. Ooh, judge doom. The villain and who frame Roger the rabbit. When he killed your brother, he talked just like this. Okay. Who are my issues? God open up my cold sore again Ended up itself he was good versus cartoons Right also good versus Eddie though. Yeah, remember because he had all the extra weapons in the warehouse and remember He's got he's got springs in his feet He's able he's very

Intimidating he is a cartoon. He is a cartoon. I forgot he is a cartoon. He's an actual tune. Yeah. And that, that is the main wearing human skin, I think. Yes. Yes. Yeah. And does he have the weasels with them? No, no, no, no. This is solo. This is solo. Yeah. He's too strong because especially yet. Cause the only thing that technically kills them is turpentine. Yeah, also dip would not affect Benicio del Toro No, Benicio del Toro probably hasn't come with dip Yeah, that's the things that he would have had to have known the dip was and that's things that nobody no none of these fighters Know who they're the rest of the people are yeah, yeah

But I still think he wouldn't have he wouldn't have thought to come with dip depending Yeah, cuz again the event that who's there it's all depends on who your versus Benicio del Toro Pretty much assumed he was gonna be a wolf man. Yeah time we were gonna do this Oh, yeah, and he's sitting here being like oh, oh no. Oh no, my name got called too early Be here already. I'm like what 5 p.m. 6 p.m Yeah, it's about 6 37. Yeah, I've already had four fights I do think unfortunately Benicio del Toro comes out I think at first he does a couple like he tries to do a couple of the boxing things that he learns from his personal

Trainer. Yeah, so he comes he's in the wolf man off and going ah, he is strong But Dutch doom So he comes he's in the wolf man off and going ah, he is strong But dutch doom Unfortunately springs in on a bunch of front his spring feet and shoots a sword out of his hand and fucking impales his face with it Unfortunately, I don't think I'm actually I don't even think judge doom needs to go all the way I think judge doom could just beat him to death with this walking stick. Yeah, probably and he's just like And he's just like, Oh no. Oh, I'm gonna be pretty hard to beat. Yeah. We'll see.

We'll see. Again, it's still just dip and we don't quite know who would know. Cause we got some clever people. He wasn't killed by dip, right? Oh no. He was killed by dip cause he was run over by the steamroller. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. So I mean, it's going to take some cleverness to take care of Judge Doom. I'll say that. It's

definitely going to take some cleverness here. But we have some, we got some, we get, we don't count some of these villains out yet. Yeah. Don't count them out. But Benicio del Toro, the actor, is unfortunately slaughtered immediately. Slaughtered very, very quickly. Yeah. All right. Next up we very, very quickly. Yeah. All right. Next up we have next round. Yeah. Yeah.

I know you do. I do as well, but he's dead now. Yes. Next up we have, Oh, telecom, the whale. See, this is why I chose mood dang strap to the Boston dynamic dog. Cause I knew you were going to do telecom have to do telecom, but then But then you had to do it goes like, what's going to counter Tillicum? Well the thing is with Tillicum is he is bound to his tank. Yeah.

So that is, that is kind of the rough day. It depends on who he's going against because in order to do the fight, you have to agree to go into the tank. Oh, of course. No, the, the there we've set up these stipulations before. Yeah. Yeah. Where you do have to go to that environment. You have to fight him into the tank. Oh, of course. No, they they're we've set up these stipulations before Yeah, yeah, where you do have to go to that environment. You have to fight him in the tank It's not like I mean cuz he's not like he's just rolling around on the ground He's pretty probably do a pretty good job. Yeah, they won the coin flip. Yeah, that's why yeah

Yeah, cuz otherwise it just be on the fucking dirt. Yeah Tillicum, you know, it said heads, he threw a scalp into the rink. And he was like, all right, Tilikum, you win. But whoever fights him does, they are going to, depending on if they're water breathing or not, they will definitely get scuba equipment. They'll get, they have to fight them. They have to go like, they have to be equals and that equal will be, Oh, Luigi Mangione. I think, I think we just do this once. All right.

I know telecom means a lot to everybody. Yeah. But I don't, I think it's going to take more than three bullets to take out telecom. But let's just say for the sake of this for the sake of our country Telecom knows that this will be a symbolic death This means to everybody G try to take this all the way, you know, I mean like in a way like this would truly make Luigi a villain now What telecom was you know, you can argue that's all self-defense if Luigi killed

Telling them is guilty for the same reason the Menendez brothers are guilty Not have to kill those people from his home every there is way oh my god, it's the same. I will not allow relitigation of Telecom. But if Luigi was doing what Luigi does, he'd kill the owner of SeaWorld, not Telecom. Right now Luigi has to fight the fights he can fight. Yeah, but that's the thing is that if- This is the fight he needs to fight. Yeah, if yeah, because if Luigi killed the owner of SeaWorld, then Telecom would eventually die, the whole thing would fall apart

But it would take a very long time for the entire app or the entire corporate apparatus to fall around the ears of Tillicum We need lawyers. Yeah, unfortunately Luigi Mangione in full His full like scuba fighting gear that's the. Here's what we know about Luigi Mangione. Man knows how to prepare. Like the man knows going in... And he's got money, so he's like Bruce Wayne. Yeah, he's got money, he knows how to prepare,

he knows how to go into a situation to win it! He's ready. And he's written on his harpoon gun. He has a harpoon gun. He has a harpoon gun, not a tiny little gun that's made from a 3D printer. No, he doesn it because he prepares. Yes. And he written on it, D Finn, D Gil, they don't have gifts. He doesn't matter.

He's here to kill. And he fucking beats the shoots till it come directly. Perfect shot into the center of its brain. Yeah. I don't think he's going to be enamored by the beauty of telecom No, I think I'm gonna look at him for two seconds. He'd be like, oh my god What should I do it then till it comes just grabs him by the fucking foot? He plans he thinks till it comes a fucking sellout for giving all of his free promo to SeaWorld. Yeah

He's a seal out a bit Luigi should be standing up for no, he's got a fucking show Nobody's got to be taken any kind of dirty money from anybody I think if Luigi really wanted to be till the coming just unplug the filter Yeah, but I do think that Luigi Luigi prepares Luigi knows how to get there He knows how to get the job done and Luigi does not hesitate So I don't think that there would be any sort of I don't think there would be any sort of distraction or anything like that

I think he pops in and just right in the brain I don't think till it comes got the fight in him anymore. What are you talking about? He's killed three Maybe he understands that he's got to hold some accountability and he always gets you that's that's that's till it comes move. Mm-hmm I'm cute. I'm adorable come on in the water Not Not when you're coming to kill him though, you know what I mean? But you know, I'm telling you he's very enamoring I know I know I don't think I don't think Luigi has it in him I don't know what you guys are talking about here. I think till it comes obviously a beast that cannot be defeated

I think you're fighting for till come because you have emotional attachments I have no emotional Well, no, I just think it would be a fun way to get that thing is a fun way for him to kill a whale Yeah, just shooting it I don't think you guys are correct, but I'm outnumbered I don't think you guys are correct, but I'm outnumbered. Yeah. All right. Hell of a first bracket.

Let's move on. Let's move on. Yeah. Fuck. Yeah. But we didn't know he's coming. He also was in a fight. Yeah.

But I don't know those. I don't know what those SeaWorld like killer whales, what they're paying attention to really. It seems like it takes a while before they know someone else gets in the water. Yeah, it's taking a while for them to get agitated to that point as well. Yeah. Years. All right, so next up we have, woo hoo, the biggest monster of the UK, Mr. Jimmy Savile. Oh boy. Hey, Jimmy fix it. That's right, He's got a pump on his knee. Oh man. Better meet. No, man. Thank God. He's not going against the Lerner kids. They're in a different bracket.

They might beat the fucking shit. They might take them out or they might fall in love with them. Ooh, he is charming. Talk about the telecom effect. And we have Jimmy Savile versus it's a like versus like here. It's Jimmy Savile. This was completely random. Jimmy Savile versus Diddy. Oh yeah. Battle of the monsters. Battle of the sexual predators. Different taste. Yeah. Jimmy Salvo. Obviously he's fun and shit. Definitely he's going to a Diddy party for sure. Yeah. He's definitely going to a freak off. Did he has what will appeal to Jimmy Savile cause that yeah, that also see Jimmy Sam going like, Oh yes. more money certainly does bring more problems. No, right? Say them all, say them all. No, well, that's the thing is that Jimmy Savile was a

monster of opportunity. He of course was known across the United Kingdom for years and years as a man of charity. And that's of course how we found many of his victims, you know in spinal wards mental hospitals and so on and so forth in addition to various Kids that were on Jim will fix it but did he I Think did he's like that. He's He's the spider with the web and Jimmy Savile's to fly I because Jimmy Savile was Jimmy Savile is the one that he goes to where the action

is and Diddy has the action. We don't know Diddy's kill count. We don't. Did he kill, he killed, he killed. I think he's going at, he was going after Dick Van Dyke. He kind of got his way. He got out of the way. I love like Rex Hauerman.

We were talking earlier. You're like, allegedly. I'm like Did earlier like allegedly and like did he like he killed pretty Murphy Did a lot of yeah, who else did he do? Yeah to box your core biggie small Yeah, his ex-wife they were talking about her boyfriend. Yeah Murphy's boyfriend Bernie Mac and Jimmy Saville's only ever dealt with children and kids are like well Jimmy Saville's more ever dealt with children and kids are like, well, Jimmy Saville's more teenage girls, young, young teenage girls. That was Jimmy Saville's. That was his taste. Yeah. Like he did. He, you know, let's just say Saville's clever. That's it. That's what he always said. It's always, it's better to be clever than smart. He also

manhandled full grown men. Did he Jimmy, also man did he sexual assault in full-grown? Legitly little known fact about Jimmy Savile wrestler and in he is he was a wrestler and he was in incredibly good shape his entire life I was hard to write all a man covered in baby oil especially man covered in GHB baby I think that is the main issue is that you get the GHP. That's the key here. Yeah, he's slathered with GHP baby oil which makes him the Truly someone to beat. Yeah, very difficult. Did he's got the money? He's got I do think he's got the upper body strength I think he's got more kills. Yeah people he's by far more violent because Jimmy Savile was not necessarily known to be violent

Jimmy Savile was a man of opportunity. He liked to prey on the weak I tell you what though I pay for a front-row ticket to that fight. Oh my god. Oh my god except for you gotta wear a poncho I think with this one, I think Diddy takes it. I think unfortunately, I actually think it's fortunate. Did he's allowed to win here. All right. So for the last, the first round bracket at the Western conference, we have, Oh, Keith Ranieri of Nexium. Yeah. Of Nexium. And we've also got the Symbionese liberation army. So let's do Nexium versus the S X S L a next year versus the S. Oh my god, we already

know who fucking wins the S L a pumps these motherfuckers full of bullets. They got lots of, you know, Crayton Erie, they show up, right? The SLA rolls up. They're fucking looking cool. S they, they, they, they got all their guns. They're stupid. They got the black, none of them are black. They're stupid. They got the black None of them are black. So they're not gonna be able to convince the SLA to do anything we got exactly Nothing but Ali what's her name? It's just skinny white women. Yeah, right So they roll in so first of all like it's gets Keith Reneering all his skinny white women and then you've got the SLA They're also all rich as well, which is going to piss off the SLA. Oh yeah.

This is very much the bourgeois. Yeah. Right. These like, here's the money people. First Keith Raniere has been like, can you guys even net? And he brings out his volleyball, spins it on his finger. Like he's just like, all right, let's see best two out of three, whoever wins the volleyball match that's who moves on in the game. Cut to. Yeah. Yeah. I think the SLA is going to give the volleyball game a chance. Yeah. I think they're going to try. I think cause they do have pride. Yeah. What's his name again? The, the leader, the, uh, Hey, oh, the, Oh, um, sync you sync you. You can see sync. You roll up to Keith or near him. Like, what's up my man? What's

going on? And they, you know, they do like, he tries to teach him a fucking high five back and forth and cure them. Near. He can't, but he can't at all. So then I think it's a flat, flat, flat, flat poking the eyes right through his little glasses, smashes his glasses out. Right? Now Keith Renear you can't see yeah, but he still has to put but the SLA still makes him play volleyball We're doing this the old-school way on the sand. Oh my god, so they're just gonna beat him at volleyball and then shoot him Yeah, yeah, I think so and they'll march all over him. Yeah Beat him in and then that's gotta be that's gotta be such a blow for him. Yeah. Freaks out. As soon as he fucking, he's like, you're not following the rules. Now how many of Keith Raniere's white women become SLA members?

Yeah. Ali joins. Yeah. I feel like, yeah. What's her name? Okay. Yeah. The one that was in Battlestar Galactica or the one that was in Supergirl. Supergirl Small girl yeah, yeah smallville. Yeah. Yeah. See Ali Mac joins. She's like she's definitely the angriest one Yeah, yeah, okay, so SLA picks up Ali Mac. Yeah She really she should have found yeah, well, so that's the last of the bracket That's the last of the brackets and That's the last of the brackets. And that's the thing. We have one final. We have a couple that did not make the tournament. Unfortunately, Chad Daybell and Lori Valo did not make the tournament. Unfortunately, till the next year. Yeah. Just too busy in prison. All right.

So now we are in the quarter finals. Wow. The March madness of a met murder and mayhem fourth annual first stop for Mars attacks, aliens versus Yosef Fritzl on a Boston dynamic star. All right. Now is he, is he riding it like a horse? Yes. Okay. Yeah. Has he's not strapped on like mood. Okay. Yeah, he's not strapped on like moodang He might be laying on top of it. Yeah, see I could see him Running circles with the Boston dynamic dog I could see him going around there and then not really knowing what's going on. But here's also one stipulation I'm gonna put in we've got four Mars attacks aliens Marjorie Taylor Green was such a beast

That they used up every bit of plasma power they have They so from now on the Mars attacks aliens are hand-to-hand combat. All right. Well, I will say one thing about the Mars attacks aliens We saw them take out tanks. We saw them take out With weaponry. Yeah, but why would they have no why would they have no laser guns because there has to be a stipulation on them to fight because they use it because they use it why did we give yosef fritzel a gun and we're not going to give the we never we don't know if him having a gun ever no we're but that's the thing the mars attacks aliens are covered in laser guns but they started with the laser guns but they used up all of their laser guns in fighting Marjorie Taylor green and killing Marjorie Taylor green

They're not infinite. No Agree that they would have unlimited plasma firing ability I just wonder whether or not like is if you're so Fritzel so I Think freedom bound well, I'll so freedom at think about this. He's fresh out of jail Yeah, he hasn't had a daughter in 25 years. He doesn't want to die Yeah He wants to be able to go his dream is to move back into a house with the basement that he has total control over so he Has motivation the alien

Here's what I'm gonna say is that I actually know a good amount about the Mars attacks lore I was obsessed with Mars attacks when I was in junior high, okay But specifically I was obsessed with the cards the card that oh The Mars attacks was based on but I was also obsessed tops comics had this incredible Mars attacks series It was like a five-issue miniseries Yeah In which it actually had it showed it from the perspective of the Mars attacks Aliens the movie of course made them very goofy

But if we combine that with the tops Mars attacks lore Then we know that the Mars attacks aliens did have limited resources as they were invading the earth And so if they do have limited resources there was a lot of management going on of like where are we going to put all the aliens? Where are we going to put all the UFOs? So that tells me that they do have limited resources that their weapons are not infinite And that we are dealing with a situation where they would eventually run out of ammo But as we said what you get in the first round you can bring to the next round But you do not get anything extra after you enter the first round

Well, we also said that Yosef Fritzl's had a bullet. Yes He came in with one bullet and I will say that I would that the Mars attacks aliens are Way better with technology than Yosef Fritzl and I think that they will be able to reprogram the Boston Dynamics He just be on their side. That's actually, that's, that's, he just put us into a fucking hole. Yeah, that's a very good, yeah, it's a very good point. I can't argue with that. No, and Joseph Fritzl, as much as we all, again, he has the, just like Mudeng, he has

the inspiration and he wants to go. But I just think that if you take that power from him, his 90 year old legs are not really going to be able to do it. And if you remember, Joseph Fritzl is a structural engineer, not an electrical engineer. So he's not going to have any idea what to do with that dog. But again, four Mars attacks, aliens. I do think one Mars attacks alien might get trampled by the dog because they, that's bad. Yeah. That's his best bet. Yeah. One Mars sacrifices himself so that he can be attacked by the dog with the other two jump on its back and redo it. It's a, but then, but then unfortunately they do just knock it off and they just kind of,

I think they use their massive glass like plexiglass heads and they just head butt, Yosef Fritz all over and over again until he's just mush. Yeah But now that they've reprogrammed it what do we have now we have three Mars attacks aliens with one Boston Dynamics dog Which is fucking powerful. Honestly, this is a huge commercial for Boston Dynamics Because I want one of these dogs I want one real bad I want one for the network Yeah. All right. So our next fight we have Yon and the Lerikans versus still hungry Al Gada. And I'm thinking they kill the Gallagher. They kill an alligator. Unfortunately, I have to say Al Gada doesn't stand a chance against the Lerikans because they fight crocodiles.

They eat crocodiles are way more powerful than alligators. And so I think that this is a very easy win for the lyricans, unfortunately. And they now all have brand new alligator leather hats. Yeah. And gloves. And they have teeth that they can use in their slingshots. Yeah.

So then they can take the alligator, rip it to pieces, use that to actually enhance their weaponry Yeah, so I think that yeah, this is a no-brainer here Yeah, but this is a blowout yeah, but seen about 12 boys kick a alligator to death again, I'd pay money to see that It's not it's sort of organized It's a swarm coming from every angle and it's very difficult to get and then just and then they're making fun of you too That's also the worst part about America They're saying stuff about your fucking weight, but your clothes

Yeah, they steal your pants Yeah, it's all like, it's demoralizing Yeah, yeah Cause your dick is out in it, I'll slap your dicks and I'll punch your balls Stop it, stop bullying me Yeah Of course the on pilgrims voice once it gets to a certain frequency it can make your ears bleed And can maybe affect a Mars attack alien later on We'll see what happens Okay, so that is Eastern. That's the Eastern quarterfinals over and done with. Let's head over to the Western.

This first one, this is a really interesting fight. Judge Doom versus Luigi Mangione. Now, if we remember Judge Doom, one of the things that Judge Doom was about, what Judge Doom was more than anything else in this entire world, Judge Doom was a capitalist. That was his whole plan. His whole plan was to buy the fucking red line and to replace it. We'll see a freeway where you'll see motels,

tire salons, my God, it'll be beautiful. Now, just- And let me tell you something. You're gonna get none of that because I am the only little Italian Avenger of all the freedom and all Of the proletariat that is a beautiful Baltimore accent The name's Luigi This is a what an And sounds alike I think Since we did talk about how much he studies and prepares. I know like he knows about the day

I feel like he knows about that. Yeah, just have a water gun and like you know, you really can Yeah, that he has the dip. I think that he writes on the back Unfortunately because he's a hack he writes detune On the side of the water gun filled with dip he squirts it all over his feet bootcock is it all over his face I think he's the only one that could be judged. I think so, too I think he's the only one that could be judge doom. I think so too I think he's the only one that could have taken him down because of the power of the proletariat itself. Yeah fueled by Angry populace judge doom is like that. He's the capitalist of all capital eliminate public transportation a piece of shit

Yeah, he's trying to not only eliminate public transportation But he is willing to murder and kill the very soul of joy the toons in order to do it so and he's also a class traitor because he's it will he himself is a tune yeah he's a fucking self-hating tune yeah he doesn't have a chance against Luigi really doesn't all right so Luigi moves on to the semifinals yeah and this next one this next one, this one's pretty interesting. This is Diddy versus the Simeonese Liberation Army. Whoa! How do I say, just their sheer fear of him.

Oh, for sure. I think Diddy's own presence is so intimidating to the SLA. They so wanna be cool with Diddy. They do, they do. They wanna go to the The party and did he's got a lot of cred That's all they want all they want is for Diddy to tell them that they like their she likes their shoes They're gonna listen anything he tells them to do if he tells them to go fucking drown in baby oil. They will do Yeah, sure Diddy yeah

If there's one thing that a white man wants above all else is for a black man to tell him that his shoes are cool He'll do anything for that Makes me happy. Oh my god. It happened to me on the train and knew on the jay train once in New York I was on a high for a week. It's my favorite. It's the only reason why I wear those shoes Do you think that we could like change the attitude of the entire country if someone just told Trump is So, yeah, I think did he take them out pretty fast. Yeah. Yeah, I think so Yeah, cuz I don't like have you tried this new sports drink to like wow did he what's that? It's called sleepy boy. that He does he shows him the new new sports drink that he's marketing from his sir rock label And they're all so excited to be and he says something a velvet rope

And then he sets it all up like it's a super exclusive hip-hop party And so they're so excited to go that he has a guy's check-in they check in all their weaponry Just like you have to do at a hip-hop party Yeah, and they all walk in and then he gives them all his special cocktail and they're all dead. Now, I will say he is, Diddy loves a celebrity. So I think Patty Hearst might live if she continues how she acted with the SLA. I think this is Patty Hearst is out of the SLA. This is without Patty Hearst. Yeah, for me, this has yeah without Patty Hearst the entire time. Okay. Yeah, but you know, you know who did he picks up though? Ali Mac

One thing Ali Mac likes to do it is collaborate. Oh she does She does Yeah, we're this is the final four here. So yeah, this is incredible. So but now this is Man, this is like Duke versus Gonzaga like three Mars attacks aliens with a Boston Dynamics dog versus yawn in the lyricans Wow now and what's the other fight before we discuss this one and the other fight is Luigi Mangione versus P Diddy. I know, I know this was Godzilla versus xenomorph. Yeah. Let's do that. Like before we go, let's go. Last year's final four was on the Eastern conference. We had a Zenu, the Scientology God versus the Xenomorph, you know, alien.

And on the other side, we had Godzilla, who was quite injured by 400 birds versus a Kildozer possessed by Pazuzu. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Colorful year that was. Yeah. This year, I feel like we're really getting it down to brass tacks. What the people want to hear. Yeah. This year I feel like we're really getting it down to brass tacks. What the people want to hear. Yeah. I feel like, cause I mean, it's been a long time since we've had a group versus a group in the final four. Uh, but I'm thinking that at the end of the day, Jan and the Lerikans might overtake the Mars attack, three Mars attacks, aliens in the Boston Dynamics We don't think that the Mars attacks aliens and the Lerikans wouldn't fucking be like I love you I don't mind them

Like the craziest super group of all time There is a chance They love chaos so much Nothing more than chaos The Martians hate all humans No matter what they hate all humans There's no way because you remember even in the movie like you follow the lore right they do Kind of hit them they might go with the bad humans, and then they blow them up, too

Yeah, so like they I don't I think in the end unfortunately They would but Lerkins are immune to lies Lerkins are are immune to lies. Lerikans are- I have a Boston Dynamics dog. But I think that, yeah, sure. But I think Lerikans- But also there's no way the Mars attacks aliens can tell lies because all they do is go, agh, agh, agh, agh, agh, agh.

But in terms of the idea that Lerikans know that even if the Martians pretend to sort of get, try to get them into the fold, as they did- Lerikans are naturally distrustful. Yes, they are. And so I I am actually I'm with Marcus I think I'm gonna use some wise youth yeah the power of youth mm-hmm and how if you believe in yourself what you can do yeah right and how these little boys they are armed to the teeth they

have no parents they live in the jungle In the outback. Yeah, yeah, they feel nothing and at the end of the day. It's like I was saying with Jan pilgrim the register of his voice that Was he learned how to sing boom that all three Mars attacks aliens As soon as he learns how to sing boom that all three Mars attacks aliens Explode the heads explode just like in the movie, but I think this dog is gonna be hard to take out. They just have rocks But they could also they have tricks and you know you could do is you can get you can Trap up a ball so dynamics with old-fashioned especially like old-school rope Yeah, traps like you, like you like you, you attach a thing down

from a bend down tree. You like attach like a thing, you know how they do it where it lifts you up, where the rope is attached to the super thin tree and it flips you up into the sky. I could see them doing that to a Boston dynamic dog. The dog takes out at least one or two of these. Sure. Yeah. I'm going to say, I'm going to say he takes out three. Yeah. But Americans are, they multiply. Yeah. And they're boys just keep showing up. It would literally be a cloud of dust with fists I'm gonna say he takes out three. Yeah, but Americans are they multiply. Yeah It would literally be a cloud of dust with fists coming Like Heathcliff getting into a fight. Yeah, I think we could do this I think that the lyricans can beat the Martians. Yeah, yeah live. Yes, of course Well, John's the one who delivers the coup de grace

But while he does that does the dust Boston Dynamics dog just fucking rip his larynx out No, I think that the other lyrical take care of I think the other lyrical make sure that the boss because remember they have One goes after them the dog the other half goes after the aliens They also can naturally form really good like towers and piles as boys Yeah, but also remember they have all the Mars attacks aliens They have everything they have everything that they gained from killing Al Gada. Yeah, you remember they have all their stuff So they got like it's skin and it makes it more fucking resistance to weaponry I think that they can overpower the aliens because there's not as many aliens

Yeah, it all depends on if the Boston Dynamics dog gets him down on the ground and stomps on him Yeah, it starts ripping out their throats. Well, it doesn't have mouth. It doesn't know no No, it's just the Boston Dynamics dog. It's only powers in its legs and how much you can stand It's got to give this thing a robot mouth No head no head you can attach a gun to it, but we But I think in the end of it John and the Lerikans it alright, so we're talking seven Lerkin's and yawn Yeah, seven Lerkin's and yawn Wow I would have never thought that the Lerkin's would make it this far. It means something to people. Yeah, they really do

But they have right now again. It's like the Eagles last year. They just want it more Yeah And in this one it and that's the thing is that the Lerkin's never would have made it if yawn hadn't come on because yawn was Again, it's like the Eagles last year. They just want it more. Yeah. They just want it. And that's the thing is that the Lerikans never would have made it if Jan hadn't come on because Jan was the one that eventually saved him from the Mars attacks aliens. Yes.

You never know what's gonna happen on the last podcast on the left, March Madness of Mayhem and Murder. You never know when you're waiting for a hero when it's gonna show up. And there's a reason why this was the wild card edition because anything can happen, ladies and gentlemen, anything can happen. Semi-finals on the other side, we have Luigi Mangione versus P Diddy.

I don't think it's a competition of all at all. I don't think Luigi Mangione is impressed by a single fucking thing that did he has to say or do. And I think Luigi Mangione again, shoots him in the back of the head. He's going to be able to get that close to Diddy. Did he have, he has to think about Brian Thompson is Brian Thompson was a loner. He'd always go out by himself. Telecom sitting there alone in the tank. Diddy has a crew at all times. But I will say Diddy is again, he's a star fucker. So the reverse of the SLA where all the SLA are super enamored with Diddy and want to

get on his good side and do whatever he wants, I could see Diddy originally sucking up to Luigi Mangione and saying we should be friends because I think that you're super cool. But Luigi loves the attention. Exactly. But that's the thing is that actually if you guys I don't know if you guys know this But I think Luigi and Diddy are currently in the same prison well like they're in the same I think they're currently in the same jail, and I think I remember actually I think I remember reading that Diddy is actually jealous of Luigi for how much attention Luigi is getting and Luigi's actually attention Luigi's trying to back off a little bit He's like stop stop sending pictures. I don't need any more pictures. It eventually will poison the jury pool against him

Yeah, I think the Luigi had their both. Yeah Yeah, they're both DC. They're both in Brooklyn. Yeah, I think there's a really solid chance that did he can take Luigi See I do think that if it was a one-on-one fight. Yes Did he could absolutely physically manhandle Luigi Mangione. Yeah, absolutely. He's larger than him But we have established the diddy that Luigi prepares, of course And I think what did I think what Luigi is gonna bring to this one landmines That's gonna take it that's gonna take away the fucking first wave of the goons Luigi Mangione is has become the Batman of this competition Yeah, he really in that way. I do and then because he has that ability

I would label him as such but then also did he's got hmm, can did he call upon the ghost of Brittany Murphy if Luigi Mangione, you know in when their soul's in the thing? Once you murder someone, well, Diddy's not really into Satanism or anything like that, so no, he's just murdering God. Are you ready for this? Luigi Mangione, handful of landmines, he's going to put them down.

What's on the ground? Bunch of baby oil. Whoops! Slips! The landmines fly in the air! Wow, okay. I never, because Diddy's got a lot of time to think. Yeah, he does. He's in jail. And you know, I feel like we've been discounting him in a way. Wow.

We've been discounting Diddy quite a bit. Diddy's prolifically horrible. He was a, he wasn't a career criminal. Yeah, that is true. That is true. Yeah. I think. Wow. I didn't even think about it in terms of that. The is true. Yeah, I think Baby oil and yeah, cuz that's the thing if anything

Luigi mangy, and he could suffer from who this is Batman versus the Joker. Yeah Yeah, they did he did dress as the Joker and I think this might be the time that the Joker takes it Wow, yeah You flipped on me too. I'm sorry ladies and gentlemen I know it's gonna be deeply unpopular. Yeah it's gonna be really unpopular. Just because he's evil doesn't mean he can't win. That's what I know. Casey Affleck won an Oscar. That's what this is about. What here? Yeah, yeah, no, Casey Anthony's still out there hanging out. Oh my god, is that Diddy as the Joker? Yeah, that's Diddy as the Joker. God, he looks great. Do you ever see the video of him harassing Tyler, the Creator?

No. At the Joker? Oh my god. You could see Tyler, the Creator is like, so he's pulling out of some party, Diddy is dressed as the Joker and he keeps trying to get him to come out of the car. And you can see this look on Tyler, the Creator where he's like, uh like, no, thank you. No, I don't want to go with you I don't want to go so tough, but he's actually a really nice guy Tyler the creator. Yeah, he's a very nice guy He's a very easy season, but you see this thing where he's trying to get him to come out. Oh my god

No, it's a fake gun. Yes. It looks very Yeah, it should be He was in apparently he stayed in character all night apparently. And it was very frightening. Yeah. Oh my God. No, this is this terrifies me. Yeah. That's what Luigi met Diddy as Joker for Joker fried Diddy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So unfortunately, yeah. Did he does take it, but this is a very, this is a very interesting. This is the longest fight we've had. Yeah. Yeah take it? But this is a very, this is a very interesting. This is the longest we've had. Yeah. Yeah. But this is a very interesting final here.

Man, it is Diddy versus Yon and the Lerikans. I mean, if anybody can woo these little Lerikans, you see the man who's got fucking gallons of baby oil and people who are going to fuck these lyricans. Why do I say that? These lyricans have never had sex like this. But the lyricans, I think they love all crime except for sexual assault. Yeah, I would say that too. I think that they're not sexual angel.

I don't think they're sexual beings. They're too young. I think that they just like the freedom of the outback. They love, they commit crime for the fun of it. You don't think think they commit crime for the money show them a pair of titties and they're gonna go, oh my God, I bet you, but I also think boys would come too fast. And I think that if you go right to sleep, dude, if you show, but I do think that if you showed a bunch of boys, a pair of titties, right? Like let's say you called what's her name over you call the iced tea's wife Coco Coco let's see Coco go over huge titties showing them to lyricals I think they come their pants immediately and yeah at first

you're like wow but then it's kind of over and then once you've come I don't care about it he's been manipulating young gang members his entire life You think you like he has this and like and also he could just straight up like drug them up because we know Lerikans are gonna do drugs and we know that we know that he has drugs and plenty of booze So rock all around they like booze, but I think that the Lerikans are smart enough to know That they're gonna he's gonna turn the tables on him I think that they know that he's just luring them in like a captain hook and I think that they can see past that and I think that there is a somewhat somewhat of a code to the Lerikans I do think that Lerikans stand just like Luigi Mencioni they mostly

stand for freedom. And they don't want, they don't want, they don't trust a shady adult. They're not going to become trafficked by Diddy? I don't think so because I think that what Jan Pelgrim, if you have Jan Pelgrim at the head of this Lerikan group, because what does Jan Pelgrim want? What is the only thing Jan Pelgrim wants? To kill. Murder. And Diddy only murders when necessary when necessary murders way too high profile for him

So I don't think that this is gonna be their crowd I don't think they're gonna want in here at all if the Larracans can take out the as far as I'm concerned the Larrans can Take it out the Mars attack aliens. They can take out diddy Yeah, I think that if diddy is really like if you're gonna fight all of these boys the thing about boys again They just keep showing up and anybody can be a lyrican can you just have to just give up living in society Yeah, well as a child. Yes, you can't be an old lyrican and you have to be a good an old lyrican is a bastard A convict, a criminal, a drifter, many different things. And I think at the end of the day, I think before Diddy even opens his fucking mouth,

I think a lyrican hits him in the head with a slingshot rock and he goes down and they just beat him to death. You don't think he doesn't have a gun on him at all times? He might have a gun. He might. But at this point we've just been using oil But that's the thing is that diddy by you know by the strategy that you put forth Diddy strategy is to try to bring the kids in is he right? He's gonna try to manipulate them smooth talk

Yeah, he's gonna smooth talk him. He's not gonna come out with the gun I think the Lerikans get him in the head with the rock and that's really all you need a well-placed rock I said they could they get their fill of good dog you know like pigs in a blanket and the mimosas going around what they have a diddy's parties yes in a blanket triangles when they all each when they are filled with the spinach triangles they are then they've already served their purpose at the party yeah they've gotten the free food and the booze that they wanted that's the only reason why they're there.

They don't care about the women. They're sexless. Yeah. And I think at the end of the day after they killed Eddie, they take over his empire and they run it into the ground. Oh yeah. They spent all the money very quickly on pinball machines, a bunch of sour candy. Yeah.

And the Lerkins formed the real one. That's it. Yeah. Lerkins formed the real bad boy entertainment and ladies and gentlemen, that was the fourth annual last podcast on the left. March madness of murder and mayhem wild card edition. One of the craziest tournaments we've ever had in the entirety of this tournament that we've been doing over the years. My God, that was a hell of a day. It was a hell of a night. We are. We, I know we're going to hear the end of it, but that's why we want you to chime in. Side stories, LPOTL at gmail.com. Where did we get it right? Where did we get it wrong? And what next week? I mean, next year when we do this again, we are terrified of Lerikans. I think is the one thing we've decided in

this world that scares us more than 14 year old boys. I don't like them. All right. They are unpredictable and they are unstoppable because we can't do anything about them. All right. I can't hit them. I can't like, you know, cause if I was allowed to. That's the thing is you fight back against the Lerikans, you go to jail.

That's the thing is that like, yeah, sure. A well-placed strike of an SUV can kill a lot of Lerikans. Yeah. Oh man, he does have plenty of escalates Yeah, if we want to reach over want to talk about this again I just don't think there's too many of them. Yeah. Wow. This is just I Love us. Yeah, that's do I is our best work Patreon.com slash last podcast on the left If you want to see this and all of our episodes in video form, you

can see absolutely on the video that every single one of our matchups were completely and totally random pulled it from this cup that I'm holding right here. Nothing fixed here. Nothing fixed. You can also check us out at last podcast on the left on Tik TOK and Instagram and go check out all of our streams at twitch.tv slash LPN TV. And don't forget to come see us on tour. Yeah, baby. We're going to be in Detroit on April 18th. And then we're going to be after that. We're going to Toronto on May 3rd and Atlanta on June 28th. And then after that, we got a whole bunch of more shows about to be announced. So make sure you check that out. Also come check me out. I'm in Florida right now. Let's hang out

I'm gonna be in Jacksonville on the 20th I'm gonna be in Panama City on the 21st and 22nd and in Tallahassee with Danny Bedrosian of Parliament Funkadelic at the 926 bar and grill on March 23rd You're not gonna want to miss that that's gonna be an amazing show Coming back to the old stomping grounds in the very room I started comedy to be so much fun man, and I can't wait to do we're gonna have fun Orlando and Fort Lauderdale That's right. I'm sure so yeah, be fucking great. They can't 8th. We're gonna be in Fort Lauderdale Dang it beach for side stories and on May 8th. We're going to be in Orlando and the funny bone fuck that

Yeah, yeah, Hail Satan, everyone! Oh, and hail Gine! And make sure to remember, always fight for freedom. Yeah. Hail Telecom. I'm doing it. You're allowed.

I miss them. Yeah, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that that happened. That's the sound he made after Luigi Mangione fucking showed his ass.