Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: A Fortnight at Bernies w/ Carolina Hidalgo

Episode Date: September 23, 2026

Henry & Eddie bring you this week's weirdest stories and true-crime news: Internet detectives reveal more allegations surrounding Wheel of Fortune's Jim Thornton, new details on RC Horsch's Horror House, and the Caleb Flynn murder case. PLUS! Carolina Hidalgo joins the boys for the return of No Dogs in Space to discuss digging up Noah's Ark, daycare fight clubs, and just how many toddlers they could take in a fight. For Live Shows, Merch, and More Visit: www.LastPodcastOnTheLeft.comKevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Last Podcast on the Left ad-free, plus get Friday episodes a whole week early. Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

There's no place to escape to. This is the last podcast. On the left. Side stories? That's when the cannibalism started. Side stories. Yes. Dude.

Went and saw that Resident Evil last night. Yeah, you like it? Oh, doctor, doctor. Give me the news, dude. It is good, right? Of course. It looks great. It is a video game movie.

Like, it is the first video game movie that, like, like is a video game. I love this. We're not being paid or being asked to push this movie by the way. I legitimately love this fucking movie. It's fun.

It's not, I mean, like some people will be scared of it because it's very gory and there's monsters, but it's an action movie. Yeah, but also like,

yeah, that's the whole point. It's Resident Evil. Why would you show up to a Resident Evil movie if you didn't think there wasn't going to be monsters and things

getting shot and things have been scary and sneaking around? It is like a gameplay. That's awesome. I feel like they could do the movie again with the same character and it could be completely different

because it feels. because it feels like a gameplay. I believe Zach Cricker was saying that was the goal. I'm excited to see it. I haven't seen it yet. Dude, it's fucking awesome. It's bloody as shit. Fucking everyone gets killed.

If someone shows up, they did. I'll tell you what, though. I don't know if it will hold a candle to Pumpkinhead 2. Oh, I don't know about that pumpkinhead. That's what I watched yesterday was Pumpkinhead 2, which is probably, I'm going to say, the best movie ever made. Oh, really? So I think that that's... I don't want to...

I don't want to spoil it for you. No spoilers for you. It's so moving and audacious. And the movie insists upon itself. You know what I did for Resident Evil that I should do for Pumpkinhead too, but I don't think it's going to be an option? Dirk off before you go so you can focus. No, no, no, no, I do it during. The, I did the screen X.

The three-sided screen. Oh, no, why? I figured I'd try it out. I'm like if any movie might be fun. I don't like Novelty. That's my big, one of my... It's blatantly not making. for it. That's my gripe. That's like

my, Henry, trademark, Henry Gripe. Yeah, Henry Gripe. Right here, right now. Yeah. Don't change the screens on me. Yeah, yeah. Don't, I don't need the chair moving around. I don't need all this kind of sensation going on. I didn't enjoy it. I have to say, I'm never going to see another movie like that. It's, that's my old man. That's an old man sentiment I have. Well, I don't think anyone enjoyed it, to be honest with you. I just heard people

complaining as they left. It's because they just kind of like spread the edges of the movie off onto the walls. Yeah, stupid. And it's like blurry. Yeah, what's the point of it? And they have to like shut it off on certain scenes. They're like, no, we actually need you to concentrate. This is stupid. That's so stupid. I saw Backrooms and 40X and it was so cool. What do you mean? Backrooms in 40X? Nothing happens. It was so cool. I love the movie, but there's not like anything happens in backrooms that require you to be jostled back and forth. You got to see it. It was cool. I'm fine. I like my chair for me to be sad upon in which I'm just watching the movie. Life is distracting enough. If the movie was specifically

made for the three screens, I could be into it, maybe. The phone is already saying, don't watch the movie. The phone is just sitting hot in my pocket going, don't watch the movie, look at pornography. Look at what they're saying. Don't you want to see it with the same? Don't you want to check the news? Don't you want to see what they're doing? Yeah,

no, it's hard, man, already. So I don't need all this distraction. I just want to be able to jerk off in a movie theater in peace. Because that's the whole thing. If I'm in the 40x and I'm shifting back and forth and I'm the middle of Jay and off because I got a nice J-Law scene going on. I don't want to shoot it all over the knees of the person next to me.

Or the back of the person in front of you. Thank you, Eddie. Welcome to Side Stories. You guys see the guy who maced the crew, the whole crowd? No, we're getting into it. Don't get ahead of me. Don't get ahead of me. Don't get ahead of me. Don't fuck with my movie theater. I went back regardless of the Mace Man. Whatever, it's a hero, and you also follow the rule, so it's not your fault. So here we go. Welcome to Side Stories. My name is Henry Sprout Schroiske. Sitting here with the very entertained Ed Larson. I am happy. with my decisions. And it's really good. Did Julie like it?

Julie loved it. We had a great time. It was a, it was played for both of us. It's just fun. Great. It's just a fucking blast. It's just a fucking blast. Jack Grigger, give him $10. Give me $10. I want my money back. Give him his money back for the promo. For the promo. Give him his money back. We're going to go to us. We know where he lives now.

So we're going to go find him at his house. I'm going to find you. I was going to give you a hug. And thank you for making this a cool movie. And then we're going to grab at you and say, make sure you give us every script. We want to read everything that we do. We want to be. in your home, we want to be on your set, we want to be in your life, we want to have sex with your wife, we want to raise your children. I want to be a Crager. We're going to make

that happen. Can I be a Crager? I'm just going to change my name. I don't think he's going to stop me, actually. Fuck you, dude. You're fuck Zach, Craigor. Yeah, you're fucked. I'm going to go legally change my name with Craigor and then I'm going to be your brother and you're going to have to put me in shit. Yep. Done. Fuck you. Just like Christopher Nolan. Eat shit. You can be Nolan.

I'm Christopher Nolan. You've changed your full name from Henry Slavisky to Christopher Nolan. I'm Christopher Nolan. I'm Christopher Nolan now. Start directing movies. Yeah, absolutely. But like, we're doing, you know what we're doing my favorite, we're doing Weekend at Bernice. We're revamping Weekend at Bernice.

Except this time, whole week. Wow. Fortnite at Bernice. So here we go. We have a lot of updates. First thing I want to hit is on, first of all, our favorite guy here, Braden, also known as

clavicular, has finally been charged with rape and drugging a woman. It has been a long time coming. He has been very much bragging about his crimes all over the internet. Last time we covered him, he had overdosed. And for those of you don't know, clavicular slash Braden, his name's fucking Braden. He is a looksmaxer, which is this thing that is a poisonous thing that they're giving a little boys on the internet, which is they're smashing their bones in their face. They're doing all sorts of injections. They're taking their bones out. They're doing all sorts of weird experimental health things to themselves to make them look like

very pointy skeletons. He's a cancer on society. He's a cancer on society and hopefully soon he will be a cancer in jail. But we will find out that because we've been knowing that Klobik Giller is cruising for a prison for a while. We've been calling here on side stories waiting for the day, knowing

for a fact that Braden was going to commit a crime. Yeah, well, I mean, this shit's been, has happened over a year ago. Yep. And it's now taking this. It's taken a while for the charges to build. He got an underage woman an underage girl, 17 years old. A girl. A girl. Yeah, you're right. You're a girl. She was drunk and he had sex with her. Yep. And then he injected her face with some bullshit all on camera.

Yep. And then in the morning you force himself on her again and now she's pressing charges. Good. And I think that's, and I hopefully, and I wish her strength because I know that this is an extremely difficult process. And I hope that she is all right going through this. And I hope Calvicular will see his day in jail. Yeah. And there being, of course, this whole team. being fucking horrible about it. It's like, oh, it took you three months to mention this. Yeah, of course. Because it's extremely... Because you're fucking haunted, bro.

Because it's extremely traumatizing and you're a fucking multi-millionaire with access to whatever lawyer that you could have access to. So that's why they're afraid because that's why he rapes nobody, unfortunately. And I don't mean that in a bad way. I'm just saying that's why he rapes a girl because then

he can get away with it. You notice he didn't do it to another influencer. Yeah. Well, he's also been in the past, he's gotten in trouble for making women fight on camera. No, he's not He's bad. He's a bad person. He's a bad person. That OD should have wiped him out, but it didn't.

So, I mean, but we wish him the best here. Because it's all still a legend. So just so you know, James Vlasikas, part of the Snowtown Murder Crew, he has also being released, but we knew that for a fact. He's the young one, the one who was abused by his brother. Yeah. And kind of like talked into the whole thing. If anyone should be released, I'd think he is the guy. He was already in the mail.

He was getting released. released. They'd been talking about this for a while, which has finally happened. 25 or 26 years, something like that. Yeah, and something like that. And then they, so he's now, he's going to be out. I think it's interesting. You know, recently too, another person, this is another update for us that we didn't cover really, but Paul Bernardo is also up for Purole. For those of you, they don't know. Who's that again? It might not be aware. Paul Bernardo is a part of the, what it became known as the Ken and Barbie murderers in Canada. They did horrific crimes. Well, Paul Bernato and Carlo Homo

They were a team, and they raped and murdered a bunch of girls together and also her sister, Carla Homoca's sister. And eventually what would happen is that Carla Homoca walked. So now she's like being kicked out from place to place in Canada as they discover her real identity because she's hidden her identity. And she's kind of wormed her way in a bunch of mommy groups in these like little towns in Canada. And they find her and they kick her out and she moves on to the next town essentially. Isolate yourself? No, it's because she's a fucking psychopath. You probably should have been in jail.

Paul Bernardo, though, is now up for parole, and I doubt he's going anywhere, but Canada can surprise you. Yeah, you know, they like to love people on. Oh, they just delayed it. Oh, they just delayed the parole hearing. Good. Good, good, good, good, good, good. No, Paul Bernardo, I would say, yes,

you know, I'm criminal of many different things. I would say his worst crime of all, though, his attempt at rapping. He did an entire thing. You should have heard his whole, like, I'm Paul Bernardo, and I'm here to say I rap in a Canadian way. Oh, no. Yeah. But they never like good music.

Oh. I feel like if you enjoy good music, it keeps you from doing crimes. Oh, you're talking about Canadians in general. I'm talking about just murderers. Yeah, yeah. Sometimes, except for Dennis Nilsson. Do you think James Valiscus, Phaliscus, how do you say his name? Velascus.

Velascus, I'd say? Velascus. Velasicus. Velasicus? Do you think he's ever going to go to a live? concert. I mean, if I was live, if I was live, then I'm not. But if I was

live, I invite him every day to every tour and be like, hey, listen, let me make it up to you. We want to redo the songs for you. Is live on tour? Yeah, with four non-blondes. Whoa. Are they going whoa, they're going to Australia.

Oh, oh, oh, dude. This is what I'm fucking talking about. Oh, my God, are they going to Adelaide? Oh, and Stone Temple Pilots. No fucking way, dude. Yeah, they're going to Adelaide. They're going right to Radlaid. Oh, my God. We have to...

All right. Let's buy him a ticket. It's buying him a ticket. Let's fucking have him say I'm sorry. Is this bad? Send him to the meet and greet. Send him to the meet and greet. Oh, my God.

Let's go with this parole officer. He's just giving me like, you know what to you? It's just got to be amazing for him. It's called the Justin Time Tour? No, I'm saying he's just... He's out just a time. That's amazing. You can go see them live, dude.

You've always wanted to. That's amazing. Wow. God, I want to see this show. Honestly. This is a great tour. It does look like a lot of fun. In Australia?

Oh, man. I'd fly to Australia to go see live for non-blondes and Stone Temple pilots. My wife won't go. I'd like about eight of those songs, I think. Dude, you'd be surprised. Seven? You're not picking the STP? I love STP.

Scott Weiland's dead. See, AIC, that's first. SDP, right below it. Allison Chains is AIC. Yep. Okay, okay. That's what I view it. That's my uncle state.

That's my rank right there. Yeah, yeah. I mean, of course Allison Chains is better than Stone Temple Pilots. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I do like, but now, without Scott Weiland, who knows? But I'm certainly found a guy that sounds just like him. Yeah.

Could have been me. Wow. You're not skating enough. You're not androgynous enough. You need to have a thinner waist and a better belly button. I miss him. Jeff Gutt is the new singer. Oh, Jeff Gutt.

Oh, buddy. Good for you, boy. I'm happy he got a gig. It's kind of funny because it reminds me immediately of the director of Pumpkinhead 2, Jeff Burr. Oh. I wonder if he's as talented as him. We're covering, you know, it's a pumpkinhead thing. It's for movie stories.

Go check it out. It's over on Patreon. Yeah, October is going to be all movie month over there, movie stories. having a good time. Eric, speaking of horror month, this is just another quick update because we're not getting into this right now, because we are going to do an entire series on the story.

Just so you know, also, guess who's sniffing around? Our daddy, Netflix is sniffing around this story as well. Oh, really? Yeah, they've been asking people that are connected to this case for interviews already. R.C. Horsh, the Philadelphia pornographer slash whatever you want to call him. He doesn't have a bad man name yet. No, no, he does not have a villain name yet. He's probably the Kensington killer.

The Kensington Horror House. It's actually outside of Kensington in Philadelphia. He, you know, wore an eye patch. For those of you, they don't know, his son, Eugene, her horse, was arrested on getting drug charges, all this kind of shit. They began to investigate the house he was living in where he lived. Mr. Horchable. Mr. Horchable. That's great.

That's great That's a shitty name he deserves Yeah, of course It's hoarse Right, you know, that's a good one But he, uh, because he's very obviously A Rapist and Murderer by his face That's the worst part again

Which we covered this last time about sad That he just looked scary and then is scary I like somebody that's the opposite Oh man It's never judge a book by the cover But like the book is just like filled with the word rape Hey yeah, yeah The Rape Manual

You gotta want to read it for you. You really don't want to read it. Oh, actually, oh, it is what it says it is. And so this is a, it's like every Paul Farovin film. So this, there is a bunch of updates. And we really don't want to get into all of the updates because of just how thick it is. And we don't want to mess it up. And we're going to do an entire episode on this.

Just so you know, it's looking like there is evidence of another snuff film. Of course. There is at least evidence of they're saying right now. saying up to five dead people. I heard up to 60. I mean, who know. Well, fucking who knows. It's just all over the place.

Are there 60 missing women attached to the building? Yes. There are women that were because part of what he used to do was that he used to take, quote unquote, take pictures or do quote unquote art projects with homeless women. Yeah. And so a lot of them went missing. So we don't really know yet. If it was him or just.

Don't know. But I did find out that Eugene had the local nickname of Jizz. Oh, no. I got that from a, uh, from a listener that said that he got a local nickname was Jiz because of his dad. Oh, no. So his dad was a pornographer, so everybody called Eugene Jiz.

Because he is his dad's Jiz. And so that's how he referred to his son. I don't know if it's that logical. I just, he was just straight up calling him Jiz. Hey, Jiz. Yeah. You dad make Jiz. You're Jiz.

Man. So I've been listening to this new artist from New Orleans, named Flagboy Giz. And I thought for a while it was Flagboy Jizz. And then I started listening to his music more. There's nothing jizzy about this. Yeah, yeah, and then he mentions himself as Giz, and I'm like, oh my God, thank

God I didn't make that mistake. Because he's always also rapping about killing people a lot. And so I'm glad I didn't accidentally meet him and be like, hey, Mr. Jiz. Hello, Mr. Jiz. What'd you call me? My father was Mr. Jiz. All right? You call me Randy.

Dude, look at this guy. Tell me you don't love him immediately. Oh, that's, this is the guy? That's Flagboy Gis. What is this? Dude, we outside is like the best song ever. His fucking new album, Gunfight, dude. It's like the, not the album's called Gunfight. The song Gunfight is fucking, I have no idea.

He's incredible. He's a Martin Giro Indian. It's good. Yeah. Have you been listening? I've heard it. I've heard it win viral. It did?

Okay, good, good, because I go on, I go on Spotify. He's got like 2,000 listens. I thought no one's really listening. It's like a New Orleans thing. It's not a hat. It's a fucking, it's a lifestyle. You know, it's like. He's been New Orleans.

New Orleans vibe, you know? Where did you get that hat, Mr. Jiz? Giz! You're going to get us killed! Choose me, Mr. Jiz. My question is, how many exotic boards how to be executed. It's honestly, and I don't even know if he can find him.

Dude. Because he's covered in, he's covered in Paz. Dude, I'm telling you, that man will kill all of us. I love him. I love him, I want him on the show. Hell, yeah, Super Sunday. Go stay away from him. No, I don't want everything.

I love him, though. I love this attitude. I got to hear the song. He's the prettiest. He's the prettiest. It's rap. It's like rap, hip-hop. It's New Orleans music.

Great. New Orleans is, all New Orleans music is everything. You are the number one. If there was a person who liked Zydeco and Nola-style music, you're like the person who likes it the most, who is not an older Creole woman from Nola. Like, you have the taste of a, of a, of a. a witch doctor from the swan. You love this. You just love

New Orleans music. I will say this is the one time Amber shared music with me and I didn't hate it. Wow. And I actually, I'm kind of obsessed with it. That's incredible. My problem with Nola music, truly, is that it kind of feels like how blues feels to me sometimes, where it's so state

specific that, like, when I hear New Orleans music and I'm not in New Orleans, it makes me really fucking sad. Really? Yeah. Because I'm not in New Orleans. Tell me you don't love this shit. No, it's good. No, it's good.

That is really good. I'm excited for him. Ed's taste is getting smoother or my taste is getting janglier. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I feel like you're getting smoother and I'm adding even more jangles. I've been getting really into more kind of jangly music. Yeah, I've been cutting out white people in music in my free time. So there's a white genocide happening on your Spotify.

I will go see a white man. live play music, but as far as listening to it in my free time, you get the fuck out of my head. Unbelievable. If I'm listening to a white man, it's Henry Zabrowski. Thank you, hey, and I'm the only white man you need. And guess what?

You don't know what's funny about that? I ain't even white. I'm Polish. Wow. We know that. That's why I like it. Well, y'all know that I ain't white. You know I'm Polish.

You know who is white? Jim Thornton. Now, talking about a white guy. Live from North Bay. So this is, all right, we're going to have to do a bit of frame this. This is, we're in a bit of, I'm going to say, I don't even like the term I'm about to use. This is a bit of a sticky situation.

So we covered this last week. Jim Thornton, the former announcer for Wheel of Fortune. Is he officially fired? Oh, yeah. The Wheel of Fortune did a more thorough job than the police investigating Jim Thornton. Now I think I know why. So Jim Thornton, I think I want to say two weeks ago while we were on break. He was the announcer of Wheel of Fortune, one job.

Literally, the easiest job in the whole fucking world. Had the whole world in his pocket because all he had to do was read from a sheet of paper with his big, fat, dumbass head flopping back and forth. That is all he had to do and do nothing else. That is all he had to do was just do that, do charity runs, and go the fuck home. That's all you had to do, Jim, you fucking pervert. But let's bring this back. So Jim Thornton was on a plane.

It was on American Airlines plane. I'm going to throw them under the bus because they're the worst of all of them. I mean, no, United Exactly. I will say I was on American Airlines fight the other day, and they were very nice to me. Good. They were very nice. We're Delta people here. Yeah, we're Delta people, but they didn't spank me or nothing.

No, good. And so Jim Thornton was on American Airlines. Of course, on American Airlines. They allow this. They like this. And so he was on a website called lifeline. Dot in which he was just

typing, tippity, type in a way, right? And what that turned out to be was a chat site that was ostensibly for pedophiles struggling with their identity and people struggling

with pedophilia. But it turns out it was more of a celebration because it was an entire website of a, people just talking about how great it was that they were pedophiles and how much they wanted to have sex with little boys.

And a lot of it was, it was all written down. And there was another website that is connected to a thing called Boy Moment and another one called Boy Life that all have a lot of C-SAM on it, all covered in porn, right? He's just looking at this on a fucking plane. So he was typing it, and Jim Thornton's excuse was,

hey, I had a family member that committed suicide. I like to spend time, my own personal time, in these various forums where people talk about suicide ideation and I don't want to talk them down and like that's what I do that's how I give. I give and I give and I give and I give and I give and a give Was his family member as self-identifying pedophile? No, he is.

So Jim Thornton, no, of course not. No, it said nothing to do with this. So no, it's all fake, Eddie. All that is fake. It's not real. Because that's what the excuse he said. He said that to the police when they called the police. I guess someone told the captain while they're on the plane

that there's a man on a pedophila website just fucking tippity type in a way. They told the captain who called the police who met Jim Thornton when they landed. They looked at all stuff. Jim Thornton fed him the line saying, I just accidentally wandered into this website and it took me about the entire flight

for me to realize, oh my God, this is about pedophilia. This is insane. And so they just let him go because I don't think they wanted to deal with it. They didn't have the resources to deal with it. that they need to get a search warrant for his laptop. They would need to do lots of stuff.

Normally, these types of bus, they take a long time. You have to build up a lot of evidence, right? Because they're very difficult to catch. So the internet went ahead and did that for them. So because immediately, he went to the Wheel of Fortune. Wheel of Fortune that seems to have far more access to massive investigative efforts. They fired him immediately because I think what they found was this stuff. which is what we're about to talk about.

So this is still all alleged. We don't know if this is indeed Jim Thornton. Okay? Yeah. I'm going to say this right now. We don't know. Is it really close? Yes.

So this came from a, there's two sources. One is from a website called gpatricksec.com, which is just like, it's like a blog site in which these guys have been, this one guy, G. Patrick has been investigating pedophile networks. Okay. Because as we've talked about in before, pedophiles have to work in, they have to work in a network.

And don't deserve a moment of peace. No. And they, when they have to work in a network, there is no, the individual lone acting pedophile is a story that the police tell you because largely these networks are really hard to get. And this is

specifically hard to pin down because it's about finding out whether or not They actually used CSAM, whether Jim Thornton had CSAM and shared CSAM. And that is all, you have to find all that stuff out because if they are just talking, they technically, as discussing as it is, they can talk about these horrific things. It is free speech. They are allowed to talk about these horrific things. Does it mean that you will continue to be the announcer for Will of Fortune?

Certainly not. No, because it looks bad. Because they already kept Pat Zajak, who's a monster. Was he a monster? Yeah. What do he do? Fucking alcoholic, mega, every level of fucking monster. He terrorized Vanna White.

Really? Yeah, but they just kept him. Man, Vanne White has had, like, a great slash disturbing career. I love, poor Vanna White. She deserved that role, dude. She should have had, but also, at the same time, fucking, I hope that wherever Vanna White is right now. I mean, she's a millionaire many times over. I just hope she's this love in life, and she's so happy that she doesn't deal with any of these creeps anymore.

And she just, she needs to do what Tina Turner did. We remember when Tina Turner, she retired her Swiss chalet with the millionaire she married. And then they went to go interview her the year before her death. And she's like, I'm tired of entertaining other people. I live my whole life other people. Now I'm living for Tina. And it was like, that's where you want to be, Anna. So this guy.

So look into this research on your own, I would say. So G. Patrick wrote this little blog thing, the letter G, Patrick. And then another guy named Slyboy, that I don't particularly like a name of the channel. But they put a lot of stuff together. So one of the things they put together was that he was posting all over these websites. So this is what I'm going to start with so I could say why they even think it might be Jim Thornton posting all these. So we know that the website, on Lifeline. chat where he was on, he was typing

under a specific nom de garre called Nicholas B 77. So they track that on these things, but he was Nicholas B77 on Lifeline chat, but they found the same account linked to an account called Little Nikki on Boy Moment.

Now here are some of the data points that Little Nikki has posted about. He said that his birthday is March 8th. Jim Thornton's birthday is March 8th. He has said that he has a son with type 1 diabetes who was diagnosed at 12. Jim Thornton's son, Sam, has diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. Wow.

Jim Thornt, the Little Nikki has said that they are fluent in Spanish, learned at 15, an ear for mimicry, and has some German. Jim Thornton has a linguistics degree. Marshall University studied German and Spanish. The Little Nikki said his job was a broadcaster, worked early mornings for years. I dreamed that you worked a job. He's dreamed of since he was a kid. Union and pension coming out would be a career killer.

So they are saying, these are guys that are saying being a pedophile is normal. That's a key to all of this. These are guys that are trying to say that pedophiles are not only normal, but a lot of times are evolved human beings that understand a little bit more than the rest of us. Yeah. They claim that they understand

that what they believe, what they are attracted to is wrong. Yep. Well, no, they think it's society. No, no. Unwrong. Completely wrong, Eddie. They think that society's wrong and can't understand that pedophilia is as old as children and that we should be allowed because Aristotle did it.

Right? And so he's- I know that there are chat groups of pedophiles who get together. Non-practicing pedophiles. Not-practice. Non-practice. And kind of commiserate together to be like, hey, let's not do this. I do know that exists.

I'm not a spokesman for pedophiles. You're not? But I will say that... And he wants to be. He says he wants to be, though. So all this goes back to them... It's good that they are in a place. No, I don't think so.

You don't think so? No, I think that pedophilia is a virus amongst human DNA that is meant to eliminate those people. I personally believe that pedophilia is a... Anybody that's non-practicing, quote-a-crasting pedophile, and I'm going to get a lot of emails about this.

I couldn't fucking care less. it's kind of like being a saying you're a comedian and sitting in your room and doing jokes at the wall for nobody what is going to eventually happen is you're going to take the jokes outside because you're sick of people not hearing jokes yeah so I think that non-practicing pedophiles

are just practicing to practice okay that is my view that is my view so I just think that all of that it's a fucking because how long are you going to deny your true self It's not what happens. It doesn't happen.

I like to hear from a therapist on this because I'm very intrigued. Please, side stories LPOTL at gmail.com. You know I love hearing all perspectives. I've heard this perspective before. This is my version of conservatism. I agree with you. That is my version of conservatively. I think that they should all just be killed.

But you can't do that. You've got to cook the dick and balls off. Yeah, but we're not allowed to. We should. I know, but we're not allowed. Well, you know, I'm just saying that's my opinion. So this guy is, so. That's where all this comes from.

That's the base of this, is that they are attaching all this together. They're pretty certain it's the sky. And what I do think is really interesting is some of the quotes attributed to Jim Thornton that have now come out. So we saw last week, we talked about him talking about how he loved

that the Burbank Golden Corral is a jet. It is an absolute boy fay, right? And so now this is what we now know about Jim Thornton, if this is indeed little Nikki. And so we're not saying it is. Allegedly it might be, but these are the things that, little Nikki said, I'm a pedophile.

So I'm an inherently nice guy. Diaper lovers unite. I have been a diaper lover for as long as I can remember. Even at age six, I remember getting sexually turned on by wearing a diaper. Whatever the reason, I love wearing them, and I love little boys in diapers. So hold on, I don't have any memories from six. Yeah, he had a lot of memories. He remembers getting hard in a diaper at six?

Yeah, he was hard by four himself. Also, that's how corny he was. still in a diaper at six, that's not very popular. No, it's because my mommy did it as an his mommy did it. We cut this a little out. His mommy did it as a punishment because he was a bedwitter. And so he said, oh, but now to this day, I keep Pampers

Good Nights excels on hand for fun, which fit my 32 waist. It's a little skimpy, but still kind of cushy where it counts. Now, we should go measure his waist to make sure that lines up as well. I honestly think that that's a lie. Let's talk to the costumer. He's a 38.

boys should be naked all the time, let's just say it. But seeing a boy wearing clothes is kind of like gift wrapping on a present. It leaves something fun to the imagination. So I love the packaging, if you will. For example, Levi's blue jeans on a little guy are so hot, but more revealing garments can ignite my imagination. So like undies, swim trunks, and especially clingy, thin cloth sweatpants. It doesn't ignite your imagination.

There's less. So if anything, your imagination should be ignited by more clothes. Something like that has me undressing a boy with my eyes. I love to do that in places like the grocery store or the airport. And the thought police can take a long walk of a short catwalk. I wish I had enough money to do a reboot of Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch. This time on a private island. Loads of boys running around scantily clad, free rides, cotton candy, hot.

dogs, root beer on tap, plenty of swimming, lounging in the jacuzzi, and having fun all day and all night. Oh my God. Do I think it's wrong to compare the persecution of benefiles today to that of the Jews at Nazi Germany? All right, come on,

Chin. Not at all. And history reveals other examples. It was the same way America dealt with the fear and mistrust of blacks after slavery ended. Again, I didn't say these things. This is not my opinion.

These are not my opinions. These are little Nikki's opinions. Yes. So no results for Jim Thornton on the Epstein list. So just so you know, they wouldn't let himself. Again, all of this is alleged. We don't know if this is Jim Thornton.

Sounds a heck of a lot like him. There's actually audio clips on here that I'm probably not going to play because that might be a step too far for us legally. But there are audio clips in that little substack thing that talks about it is Jim Thornton, obviously, because he's a announcer. He's a professional speaker into a microphone that has a bombastic voice. Yeah. And you hear him talk.

He does interviews with other pedophiles on Boy Moment, which he has been an admin of, little Nikki's been an admin of this whole time, right? And so he did interviews with pedophiles, all commiserating about how difficult their life is. And it's all just them just talking about like, nobody gets us. Nobody wants to understand the true romance of harnessing the love and eroticism of a little tight boy. Oh, God. God damn it.

He says that people brought kids to work. He was sizing up. Yeah, no, that's the other thing. He said that people were bringing their kids, like contestants brought their kids, and he was turned on by the kids. You know, God, you know, when it comes down to it, I hope they cancel the whole fucking show. Honestly, we don't need it. We don't need it. I think we can move on.

It really is. Honestly, it's not even a fortune. I don't even really care. No one's really making more than a couple grand. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I get most 200 grand. You can't lose a lot of that to taxes. A lot of it's, you got to wait for it.

A lot of people who've been on game shows is actually a huge pain in the ass. Yeah, no. Prizes and stuff. So just so you know, again, all of this alleged. He hasn't been arrested for these crimes. We don't know if he has anything. We don't have access to anything. It's just seeming like he was super, super, super, super confident.

And very, uh, he loved being. a pedophile. And I think that that's really nice in a way that he could love himself and he didn't experience any of that guilt. I have an idea. I have a plan. I have an idea. Jim Thornton. Gone. He's out. Fuck it. The new announcer.

I haven't really, I can't find out the name of the new announcer. No, maybe he's hiding. Maybe he's laying low. But a lot of people don't like it. A lot of people claiming it's AI. A lot of people saying it's not good. It's got no personality. It's got no depth. Where's Jim Thornton? Are you ready for this pitch?

I want to make an audio, I'll produce this. You don't have to do this. Okay, okay. I want to make an audio audition for Holden McNeely to be the new announcer for Wheel of Fortune. We should do this. Yep. I think we should just like. We'll do this on the show.

We should do this. Let's get it ready for next week. I love this. And let's get Holden. We will set him up an example of scripts that he needs to read. Yeah, yeah, like about vacations and, you know. The get prizes. Yeah, yeah, prizes and stuff like that.

And then a little short buyer. of contestants. Yeah, yeah, I think this is a really good idea. I want to see what Holden could bring to the table. He has a booming voice. He does. The one thing he has is a booming voice. Yeah, it's very distinct voice.

Extremely distinct, you could almost say. I feel like Holden McNeely can be the one person who comes out on top from this whole situation. And wouldn't that be a miracle? Wouldn't that be a miracle? Just another little miracle that we can keep in your pocket. That's right. So let's, I mean, honestly, I think that we can... That's not a bad idea.

We're doing this. We could off Holden on. ABC. I think it's ABC. They can take him. And then I can stop paying him. I mean, this could be amazing. So we're going to stuttering John him? Yeah. That's what this is. Yeah. This is Stuttering John.

What's the up to Stuttering John yet? He got the announcer for Jay Leno. This is a great idea. Yeah, this is Stuttering John. This is just moving. This is Howard Stern move. A precedent has been set. Yes. We're doing this.

All right. We're going to get him on the show. I bet you it's AI. I bet you at some point. They're like, we're not having another fucking pervert. no fuck that shit I don't care if it goes Cantonese I don't care if the AI starts saying racist shit all right we already had a racist

and he was Pat Sejad Jack all right whatever the AI is gonna say Pat Zajack's gonna say fucking he probably said 10 times worse God knows what he said Devana you know what God fucking knows what Pat Sejuck said to Vana of course they don't care if the AI announcer hallucinates oh man the secrets that woman

has oh she knows she just keeps those letters turns her back so we got Actually, this is another update. Yeah. So I want to talk about this. This story is, God, I love a crying man.

This is, for those of you that don't remember, we covered this in the very beginning of when this first story first popped out. Caleb Flynn, former American Idol contestant. I guess he was in the very first season. You know, it's a weird thing because at this point, There has to be 2 million former American Idol contestant. Some of them are going to have to kill. Some of them are going to kill somebody. We're really starting to see that come to the head now, and I like that.

Yeah, because it's literally one out of a million. Well, I've already had, there's been two massive crimes attached to worst cooks in America. Interesting. That show, the winner of one murdered her baby. Was it the food? No, Eddie. No, no, no, no. That's what my mom tried to do.

Long, long way. Yeah, long game. But no, no, she did just straight up kill the baby out of neglect. And then there was another crime. I forgot where the other crime was attached to top, to worst cooks. But it's kind of amazing. Yeah, but I think there's going to be more American Idol murderers. I hope so.

There's too many of them. So Caleb Flynn, he has currently been arrested for murdering his wife. And while his two children were sleeping in the other room, he shot her two times in the head. And she, she would, like, this whole thing was because, obviously, he was very, very embarrassed about the affair that is being revealed in the trial. Of course, Caleb Flynn, when he, when all this happened, he sobbed. And he was just like, my wife was shot in her sleep by home invaders. This is why I want to say straight up. Home invaders very rarely are going to kill you.

For the most part, they want your stuff. For the most part, they're going to wait until you're gone, right? This is Caleb Flynn singing, Hallelujah. Okay. So he made a whole thing that these assassins came into their home and shot his wife in the head while she was asleep. Because, of course, she's a part of the cartels. She was sent by Simon. Call what if she was sent by Simon, Callow.

Now, here, let's listen to Caleb Flynn's angel-like voice. just like a guy who'd kill his wife that's a type of fuck boy music fuck boy hallelujah it's not supposed to sound like that no it's got to be all gruff it's not supposed to sound like I hate that he keeps his face against the pop filter I hate this guy because this thing he's a pastor right because now he's a pastor

so of course all of this is like fuck boy for Christ energy yeah that I can't stand I hate hot Boy for Christ. So now they're going through the texts over 100,000 texts between Caleb Flynn and his mistress. Yeah, years long they had this relationship. And which he secured these innocent tones. This guy planned for over a year to murder his wife. Constantly talked about how he can't wait till she's gone. They talked about how they were going to murder the wife. They talked about when they were going to murder the wife. How great it was going to be when he murders the wife.

What he was going to do after he murders the wife? All these types of things. And of course, he's just saying, That is John, I was weak. Yeah, even though. I was weak. I was a man of flesh. Because there's something about,

I was watching that the pastor's wife, Netflix special. It's another example of like a crying pastor. that murdered his wife trying to cover all this kind of shit up. He hasn't been charged at all. It's like a whole thing. She went and committed. The wife went and committed suicide by calling the nine months and you're going to find my body out here. But it doesn't really make any sense.

Go watch that Netflix stock series. Okay. It's on our daddy stations to go watch them. And we, but there's something about congregations loving when their pastor has done something wrong. Yeah. Right? Like, there's something, like, it's almost like the sick thing where like, yeah, everyone's like, oh, sure, but like when the past, there's like, it's like a common trope. And I want to know why. Side stories, L-P-O-T-L at G-Mil.com.

Signs by the old days. Because I forgot what was the name. There was a famous, the guy that was like, I have sinned. Oh, yeah. Well, it makes them feel like. Who is his name? I don't know. Was that?

I forget. I don't know any of these motherfuckers' names. Who cares about that? But there's something about the, it's like, yes, they're all like naughty. pastor. We don't, but they kind of love the idea that they get to then forgive the pastor. Of course. And that they can then have like power back in a way.

You know what I mean? Like there's something that he, like there's something about that kind of, it's like a sick circle. Because it helps them, man. It helps them feel like the things they do wrong or good. And he just, there's something about it. They just love watching him just because his, you know, his

Jimmy Swaggart. Oh, Jimmy Swagger. Oh, he did it. That was the, idea of like him come, Jim Baker. Jim Baker. It was Jim Baker. We came out and did the thing where he said, Jim Baker where he was just, I have sinned, because he gave all that money.

I believe it was to Jessica Hahn. There's a whole fraudsters about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yes. And so these guys are like, it's just something about the, they love this crying pastor. But this guy is caught dead to rights. He's crying all through, he's crying all through trial. He really is doing

that hot girl thing. The night before the murders, he messaged his mistress. I'm free. I choose you. I'm free. Actions will come tomorrow. February 16th. A day I'll never forget.

I mean, what are we even doing here? But you don't understand. There's a conspiracy. They're jealous of my voice. They're jealous that I sing to God. They're jealous. I'm not.

Oh, Jesus. Intimately. Yeah, they have not found the gun. They have not found the gun. But his 9mm gun is missing from the console in his car where he kept it, and the console was open. It was asleep in its bed. Something woke it up from its bed. The invaders came.

They first kidnapped my son's gun, and then they used it on my sleeping wife. Why wouldn't they do it to you? Yeah. You're the guy. They're trying to get at him, Eddie. That's what you understand. Their enemies against Christ. Oh, is that one of this?

Yeah, it's people like us. But see, Los Angeles Enbees broke into their house in Ohio. In Ohio. In Ohio to murder his wife because they were jealous of her status of being able to marry a pastor. Yeah. And the bullets match the gun that's missing. Mm. That's going to be sticky.

But his lawyers are saying that they're trying to do the whole mess with the mess with all the evidence chain. So who knows? Juries are really fucking stupid these days. So who fucking knows? Yeah. Oh, my God. I mean, yes, who knows, obviously. But this guy's caught dead to rights.

It seems like he's fucked forever. And he should be because why is a pastor need a gun? To fight for God. That doesn't, no. You have to shoot sinners in the head to save them. It's like the Pope in the fucking glass tube. Yeah, he's really afraid for a guy who's just going to go to heaven. Yeah.

Like a guy who's going to not only go to heaven, but like the best part of heaven. Like you're going to go to the fucking Delta One lounge of heaven. And you're so nervous about dying. That doesn't sound great for the rest of us. Yeah. It's like the rest of us are fucked. Oh, my God. All right.

So what do we want to get into? We have a lot of other stories. I feel like this one we got to bring up, even though there's no real answer to what's going on. This is just to kind of stick our little flag in it and know that we are looking at this story. It is getting there. There is a, it seems to be right now, they are not saying it yet. They're not saying it yet. But there might be a serial killer in South Africa.

That is, there's a bunch of a string of crimes that they're currently investigating. This is all coming out of Kempton. Yeah, the Kempton Park area of Johannesburg. There's been nine women who have been found in the same manner. but also they're not only looking a bunch of people have been arrested there was one murder, that guy was arrested, he's in prison but then there was eight more murders after them

and so they're also looking at the fact that it might be a group of people killing women. Who knows? Who fucking knows? But right now there's a string of unsolved murders in South Africa, that's really all we know. And so just like the RC horse story, we're going to get to it as it develops. As it keeps developing.

All I know is the cops and Joanna's aren't the best. I know that they from, I went there, granted, this was 10 years ago, but there were reports of them selling their uniforms to people so they can commit crimes, selling the lights off of their cars so people could commit crimes. I don't have faith in this police department to solve this crime properly. See what happens. Unfortunately. But yeah, they are, I was told by a woman who lives in South Africa that if a cop pulls her over as a woman, they are taught to drive to the police station with the cop following them

because so many people impersonate cops and commit sexual assault and harm people. So it is a hard place to go through all this. Yeah, most of them were young. They suffered extreme violence. Yeah. There's a lot of women. There's a big warning that's been issued to women locally in the area. And it's actually quite scary.

So who fucking knows what's going on? Yeah, so if you're listening to from South Africa, take your headphones out while you walk around. According to Al Jazeera, between 2020 and 2021, an average of 5.5 out of 100,000 women in South Africa were killed by an intimate partner. Between January and March of just this year, South African police recorded almost 10,000 reported rapes, an average of over 100 per day. It is very, there are billboards out there telling you not to rape. it's uh it's it's hey at least they're getting the reminder what i think these guys really need honestly eddie well place posted note yeah that's what you need i think to really make sure you keep it on their forefront or maybe a little tattoo on the wrist that says don't rape so i hope that in south africa they um they have one of the higher rates of femicide in the world so i really hope they get their

fucking act together so i hope so too eddie you are right um noah's arc i just need to bring this up I love fakery and chicanery, as you all know. You know, I love it, especially when it's got a religious flavor. And I also just love it when people make stuff up and then they go do real world things about it. I think it's really fun. And this is a story out of Turkey. No, we're not talking about your favorite comedian's last hair transplant. We're talking about Noah's Ark.

This place, they're looking for drilling. They're starting to drill. drill baby drill at what is not confirmed as Noah's Ark's final resting place in Turkey so they're tearing apart some mountain some guy's an idiot so essentially yep this thing is called the duopinar formation so for a long time in I wanted to do a whole episode about this and I have a whole research thing done on this

and we haven't done it yet just because it was kind of dry I think at the time when I was trying to do it it was like it wasn't the right time it wasn't the right vibe and so we might bring it back but I'm really into the hunts for religious antiquities and all of the corruptions and stuff to go in with this because it's amazing. It really is, there's so many sordid tales of illegal archaeology

and I think it's fascinating. I feel like most archaeology, if you really break it down, it's probably illegal. Oh, Eddie, don't. Please don't. Side stories, LPOTL at G-Mil.com. Tell me why archaeology is fine. I know it's fine.

It's largely fine. I know it's like, it's one of those, much like a lot of French sciences, I will say, which we have found, because there was some Epstein money in archaeology, because we talk about with Jack Horner, I believe,

like, and stuff like that. Like money, sciences that need direct grants, like, are subject to grifters. Of course. So,

like, these guys need money sometimes from outside sources in order to do their job as trained archaeologists. And so they can, So I do feel like there is a lot of opportunities for grifters to get involved. Yeah.

And people who just go over to shovel. Hey, you know, just people who like to brush little moths. Marcus would have been a good archaeologist. I think he'd get too horny. You think so? I think you need to be more impartial. I think yours a good way to get to the bottom of this and really find out if that's true or not. Set him up with a little like fake dig.

I think we should talk to Carolina. We will. And ask her about this. Yes, I think this is important. All right, folks. Stay tuned right now. we got a very special guest, Carolina Hidalgo,

coming on. No dogs in space. No dogs in space. Woo! New York dolls in the house! We're talking to Carolina Hidalgo right now. Stay tuned. Live from North Lane.

Yeah. We were right next with the entire fucking time. Oh, man. But you should read this. You should read the collective, the CCRU collective writings if you can somehow get through this. I don't know if you can.

Basically, I can do anything while doing my hair. Basically, this thing is... I can literally read anything. It is fully... Because this takes 35 minutes. What people don't understand... And now it doesn't look like it does.

Are we recording yet? Yeah, we're rolling. You know what I'll say is what people don't fully understand is that the problem with comedy today is actually... I'm not even joking. It's going back to the Lemurians. I don't even know what that means. There's a lot of lemurs hanging out. Before we get into the stories...

Are these light people? Before we're going to get into stories before that we're going to talk about with Carol Elena, we need to first acknowledge the fact that the guys that are currently talking to Joe Rogan believe that Lemurian Atlantean scientists created or helped to help serve an AI god from the future. And that they were talking to Atlantis. These are the guys in charge of Open AI and Open all these companies. This is what they actually believe it. They are serving ancient sorcerer scientists that were contacted by a, for ever, ever-conscious future AI that is helping them perpetuate itself in the past.

See, I've always been a magnet at zero's guy. I didn't really like the luminaires. Yeah, the boom clap thing is really uncomfortable. Like pearls before swine. How many rustic weddings do I have to go to? Carolina Hidalgo goes, good to have you. How are you doing? Hey, it's really good to see you guys.

Congrats on no dogs. I know. Thank you so much. It's so nice birthing. a podcast. It is nice to have it out there and I really appreciate it. And Ed, you're wearing the shirt I got you for your birthday. I did. I did. I did. I did. I did. I'm wearing my gift that I got from the

record store that's now closed. That's a vape shop now. Last time I was in Tallahassee. Now it's just a giant vape shop. But it's amazing that you got that shirt. It makes me happy. That was where we used to. I don't know what you're in the mood for you know. We used to do is steal DVDs at a border so we used to sell them back there. Oh, no way. I should have done that the old way. I'm sorry. Yeah. What are you got

though. I just bought it on eBay. Man, I got these people, vinyl fever, shout out, long dead vinyl fever in town of us. Yeah, it's not there anymore. You can't even shout them out. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but they taught me a lot about music. They're not dead. There's not there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, here we go. Some of them could be dead. Okay, yeah, that's fair. Florida.

First of all, no dogs in space, the New York Dolls, where are we at with Buster Poindexter? Yes. That is episode Coda. That means episode six. That means that's, I mean, technically the worst hellraiser, but the best No Dogs in Space episode, because we're going to do a five-part series on a New York Dolls. And then the sixth part will be our CODA episode, which is all their careers afterwards.

Oh, well, because... I still feel like, yeah, sure, New York Dolls, blah, blah, blah, buster poindexter. And that's what we're going to get into... Car 54, where are you? I want a whole episode on that. On Car 54, where are you? You are nobody. You guys are no one and nothing.

If you don't cover Car 54, where are you? Can we do a movie story of just David Johan? Oh, Scrooge is one of my favorite movies of all time. It's a great performance. I'm not even joking. Scrooge is in my top 20 films. I agree.

I love that movie. I'm with you 100%. It's certainly going to get knocked off when Ebenezer shows up. Before he was Scrooge. No. Before he was Scrooge, he was Ebenezer.

Are they going to kill his parents? outside of movie theater? I think they are going to do the thing where, yeah, it's a retcon, and then he gets, and then Jimmy Cratchett becomes his Robin. I didn't realize that Christian Bail was such a good Batman because he's also an orphan. Whoa! I didn't know that. Did he kill his parents to become Batman?

Maybe. Cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Christian Bail's an orphan, and he recently built a giant foster community for a bunch of kids to make sure the siblings aren't broken up, isn't that nice? That's fantastic. I didn't know he was a real-life orphan Because I remember in his movie Sounds like a child store

In his big movie He was an orphan Remember the Empire of the Sun? Yeah Oh yeah Yeah And that was his first movie Did he go meth it?

I mean like what happened That was his first movie He might have killed his own parents Or maybe he just never experienced joy He is a newsy He is Oh really God all of his movies

About boys that he never had parents Patrick Bateman Where he was parents Yeah Maybe he'd be a better man If he was parented better You're right Well, we want to talk to

Carolina first about digging. That's what I'm here for. I'm sorry, the reason why we decided to bring this up to you, because obviously, and this is not always like, it doesn't have to always be about fucking Marcus. Because, you know, part of the show here is that like,

Marcus ain't here. Yeah. Right, so we get to play. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He doesn't hear what happens. Give it up for Marcus. He doesn't hear what happens in here. He doesn't care what happens.

It's soundproof. Yeah, he doesn't know. Marcus! Fuck you, Marcus. Nothing. Fuck you. He ain't coming. He doesn't know what we do here, all right?

We're in charge here, right? Because he can't correct us in here. Sitting here, we get to be in full lords of the man. I don't know why you think this is better. Why would you like to be wrong about? This is the place. This is the place. You can be completely incorrect.

That's the goal. We stay in it. We sit in it. Okay. I can't wait for the next 29 minutes. Yeah, you're going to love all the things we throw on you. So this story is about. digging and I think it's good to kind of just bring it up because obviously Marcus

like thing but but they think that this is you know it's also good about religion so what I love about this story is like I love grifters within the world of antiquities like I think it's awesome and so right now they are currently doing this it's what's called Noah Ark Noah's Ark scans is the name of the company and they are so there's this area in Turkey called the Drupanar for which looks like a vagina right it looks like a big hole

looks like this thing it is vaguely boat shaped yeah yeah yeah right if you look at it from the top I can see where the clitoris the clitoris of the boat is where the butthole of the butt is you could see it three holes yes some dude

where the pee pee pee pee goes can I show you can you show me show me on the boat where the pee pee comes from It's near the top. So some jerkoff saw this and he was like, this is it. Well, this was a long time ago. So wait, wait, he found the vagina. He found the vagina.

So it was discovered in 1959. Okay, good. And a Turkey-Armish captain. He captured it in an aerial photo while they were mapping the area out. Now, a lot of guys immediately said, like, oh, my God, that's some kind of boat. And this is Bible country. Right? What's the biggest thing in all A Bible? That big ass boat.

I mean, we could debate that. That's a big. But the first, in Bible one, the big thing is the boat. You think so? More than the one is the Jericho? What about the balls of Jericho? The first day was pretty big. Yeah.

The light. But all that was fake. The sun, the sun's bigger. All that's bigger. So they're trying to do here is this is, this is the, the actual historical beginnings of the Bible. Everybody's desperate to prove the Bible to be concrete real.

And yes, there is, the Bible is a historical document. Yes, it's Trope City. Yes. It is a wonderful book of listens and poetry. And it does have historical information in it. But it is not, I would say, it's meant for interpretation. And so I don't think it's really

a direct It went through a lot of, yes, I actually know this. I read the Bible in college. Yes, it went through four major editors just only the Old Testament alone. Yeah, Bible One. And this is all written by hand. So sometimes they would just kind of change a thing or two or, you know, make a male to a female. Yeah, whatever flavor is.

Yeah, exactly. They would switch it up all the time. So the Old Testament, is that more of like the original story or the prequel? How do we look at things? Okay. So, yes, the Old Testament is. totally the original story prequel. Yes. I think I figured that up.

The New Testament was the revamp. Jesus is actually nice. See, I always looked at the New Testament as the sequel to the Bible. Hmm. Okay. Because the Old Testament was the old version of the Jewish, like the old version of these stories. But the Catholics believe in it?

Of course they do, because we'll fucking believe anything. It's a lot of stories about how things beget things. Yes. And a lot of things killed things. It's a very, very boring story, unfortunately. And then the New Testament is Jesus' story ostensibly. Yeah. When he's just fucking and sucking his way across.

Yeah. Fucking and sucking and fishing and dipping, all those stuff. Slinging wine, bartending and cooking. He was honestly the first ever service industry like guy. Like he's like the line cook you fuck. Oh, gotcha. You know? The original line cook you fuck.

He loved fishes and loves. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I wish he liked some condiments like tartar sauce or something. So this is, for a while when these guys saw the boat shape formation, there's a lot of people showed up like, that's Nozark! We're going to, that's it. We found it. And many scientists said, no, it's not.

It is a natural formation in the limestone. And still, people to this day keep showing up. But every generation show them and be like, Nozark, we're going to excavate it. This is it. It's right here. And every single time, everyone's like, no, it's not. It's a randomly shaped, vaguely boat-shaped formation. It's an oval mountain.

It is an oval hole. Gotcha. And what about Mount Ararat? Remember, that was very important. Yeah, I mean, right now, it's like right next to it. It's right next to it. So we were off by a mountain? It is not real.

Oh. Not a bit of it. It's real. Yeah. Mount Ararat is in Turkey. It is. Yeah, yeah. Yes. Now, members of the Nozark scans

Sepulcdiction. Believe it, it wouldn't part, it's located in eastern Turkey near Mount Ararat could mark the final resting place of the vessel described in Genesis. And so this new lady has taken upon herself, because it takes away, lady, to take upon herself to say, no, it's actually the Ark, and we're doing something about it.

Lauren Witsky, Christian activist, is now currently drilling into the side of this thing because they believe they have news, scans. She's a full on flat earther. Oh, what? Which doesn't really work with the flood story, which is kind of hilarious.

It works. I guess it does. Maybe it does. It makes one a Christian activist. How do you have to activize Christian that means she doesn't like me? You mean you got to make your life. You got to make other people's life. So they say now the site has been probed

with ground penetrating radar. This time by this new group, Noah's Ark, scans expedition, which claims that its map what it looks like corridors and chambers under the surface, including one hallway that runs more than 250 feet. I would say when I look at the picture, that it looks like a bunch of blips and bloops.

Yes. Oh, yeah. This is, here. Look at the one with all the colors on it, Rob. There's like one in this article here. Yeah, that's all the blips and bloops that are saying is some form of tunnel and not, all of these things, right? Which I, um, I think that's fucking stupid.

You know, but if this person's going to spend a bunch of money to just go look in a mountain what the fuck do we care? I mean, you could spend it on children. Yeah, and you are destroying the land for no reason. Yes. So they said the project, they did a fundraiser. So this is for them to make money.

So they've already made 600 grand in order to rent all this. And Jane, and so far, like apparently they only have a little chunk of it, but they are just drill baby drilling anyway. So they have a driller out there. This very smarmy looking evil woman that God doesn't love.

is currently drilling into the formation. What? For $600,000? For $600,000. It goes a lot further over there. Yeah, I think so. Yeah, it goes about 10 feet deep. And they're just drilling.

Just got one guy with the drill. He's like, I'll do it. That's it. Yeah, he's like, yeah, sure. I'll fucking drill and I'm out in front. I don't know if there's a lot of regulation in Turkey. You know, because of how many times they just do the whole, like, you go there to get your, like, teeth made into metal,

and you go there to get your hair fucking turned around. Well, they had to deal with a horrible, terrible earthquake recently, and they're under a dictatorship, like, where you used to. Yeah. Yeah, so that means it's bad regulation. I mean, the earthquake should have wiggled it free. If the earthquake was going to do anything. If God was real, he would send an earthquake to knock the ark out.

And he would put it exactly in Las Vegas right where Planet Hollywood is sitting. If God was real, he'd say. He'd show up, he'd levitate the boat out, take it to Vegas. He would make Elvis come back to life. Elvis would be performing on top of the ark at the sphere. And that shows that God isn't real. That's the thing. I would say there is a God if I saw that.

That's the only way I'll believe. God in a Clippers jersey, levitating, like literally he'd have to choose. Because he's choosing the downtrodden. Yeah. Well, if this, if, all right, all right, hypothetically, this woman, she digs into there, she finds the arc. She finds the dinosaur bones that Noah grabbed the dinosaurs. He put him on the boat. No, he swam on top of the dinosaurs.

Yeah. I thought the dinosaurs were late because lady dinosaur had to put on more makeup. That's right. Oh, sexy. Oh, that's a comic strip book I read. I know. It's horrible. It's absolutely terrible.

I can't believe they made me read that shit as a child. But yes, apparently dinosaurs did not survive. the ark, the flood. Yeah, I don't think because they were so slow. Is that it? Is that they were just slow? And they got taken up by the weather? I think it was an asteroid.

The swimming dinosaurs were probably fine. Yeah. So where are they then? They're in Montana. Oh. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. There's sharks.

Tons of caves. That's a ghost. That's a ghost. So she finds a boat in here. Do people start believing your God? If there is a boat in the mountain. Just a hypotheticals. Good point.

This is my question. How are the living, fuck, this thousands of years later that we even know it's a boat? If it's already rock. Yeah, that's a good point. Wouldn't we know that that's the boat? If we just took a chunk off of that fucking rock, wouldn't we know that's a boat? I feel like you'd have to. Right?

It's boat shape. I don't think they need to drill into it to know if it's a boat or not. Yeah, we'd just scrape the side of it. We were at the British Museum. They just had a whole boat That they found Oh yeah that they think is Noah's Ark No

From another book? It was just like a movie? Franchise They have the biggest discovery of Viking Of Viking tools And stuff that ever existed Because a lot of their stuff was made In think perishable things

And they found a submerged boat That they managed to save But it's just because they got the boat And they found it's like The biggest treasure trove of Viking Historical Knowledge ever out of of a single of like archaeological event. So it's like finding boats is not

unheard of. Yeah. They would find a boat and they would know it's a boat and they'd say it's a boat and then they dig it up and it's very obviously a boat. And didn't become a bunch of rocks. Yeah. It was a boat and it was as old

as any of this stuff. So you'd find the boat. Yeah. The boat be there. But also probably not because guess what the boat is? Wood. Oh, okay, so it's done. Boats would and it would fall apart, right, up to a certain point. The reason why that boat was found is because it was submerged in the water.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, so the boat would be gone completely. The boat would be gone. The wood of decomposed by now. It's all over. Yeah. There is still Noah's Ark. It's not real. I found a baseball. Nothing. She's wasting everybody's money. It's time. Look at her.

She just wants to go to Turkey for some reason. I found a baseball bat buried in my backyard. Beginning of civilization. Anyway, good to you. But have you ever been to Turkey? Yeah. No. She's trying. Carolina's traveled quite a bit.

Yeah. Yeah. No, my parents, oh, actually, when I was little, but my parents just came back from that. And they're like, it is Carolina. It is the cradle of civilization. People love turkey. Yeah, people love turkey.

And you go there, but it's like, how's the, how's the food? I don't know. I did not ask. It's a little bit of, it's sleepy. You asked nothing. It's very good. I was like, my parents are in their 70s. I just wanted to make sure they came home safe.

You didn't find out where they were they balled at? bald like what do you mean bald where did they go where was there a sexy sexy trip they dropped their cash oh oh okay they did like one of those tour things like when you tour of other people you know and they take you around to a bunch of places

and it's like more like an international tour cool kind of thing because you know they're Hispanic they you know my mom's Colombia my dad's Peruvian so it has to have some Spanish stuff to it oh okay interesting oh so they had like somebody like walking them through it yeah that's cool And this thing and that thing and the other thing.

How are the hotels? I have no idea. The whole time I was like, when are you going to get home? Are you safe? I don't know why. I just freaked out over that. You're fine. You're worried.

Whatever. My mom's like, they're so far away. Don't be that freaked out because the inheritance then comes one step closer. Yeah, but I... Yeah. You were acting like a parent. I guess I had to go to Turkey after that. You'll get them out of there.

You'll get them out of there. I just like, I'm being a hater because I think it's funny. Are that fun? There we go. I'll be a hater against Texas because they got two different daycares out there that are running in this a fucking sticky situation. So I want to, so Carolina,

you have ran groups of children before. Yes, can you please elaborate a little bit more? What does that mean? Pickpocketing groups. Have you seen slumdog milling? Yeah, that is kind of what you've worked on. You have trained boy criminals, to shimia pipes, break into old apartments, steel, bronze.

Former chimney sweep, Carolina. That'll go. It is not an easy job. No, you coach soccer. Yes, I coach soccer for almost 11 years, and I worked with children. I know every kind of child from year two to 13 years old, special needs, you know, all kinds of social economic backgrounds, every kind of kid you could ever meet. and still there are parents who are like, you don't know kids.

And I'm like, that's fine. I get it because I don't have kids. That's fair. Well, you don't have to be in there all the time. Like, listen to them mule and shit and pissing. Yeah, no, I get it. But you know what the thing is? I know parents.

Yes. And they are tough people. I think parents are some of the worst people to ever exist. I mean, I'm sure some of them are. Yeah, I'm just saying that when I know that, just from the way they park around my house to get to the middle. school and the elementary school and I love I love families because they keep the

price of my house up but I hate the way that parents act you know I mean I don't like how they act around their children right because they're they're insane that's that's a very fun actually oddly progressive thought of yours that is my main progressive thought of yours but this is a story that like it's hard because I also like but I also like but I also don't agree with taking it out on kids. Like, I like kids. Yeah. I don't like parents.

Yeah. And so this is a story. Just like Jim Thornton. Just like. That's the wheel of fortune announcer who got busted for being an admin and a bunch of pedophile websites. Oh, yeah. Oh, no, we went deep. It goes deeper, Carolina.

Why sit in an airplane and do that? Oh, is I'm saying. It's all I'm saying. Carolina. He was a full-on admin that it's been doing this for like 10 years. He said he accidentally clicked on it. What a fucking idiot? Because he accidentally, I guess, meant to go to the other one where there's actual C-SAM on it.

Yeah. So he was wrong? He was just, you know what? You know what I'll say, Carolina? Honestly, idle hands. I really. Idle hands. He should have had more to do.

That job was too boring. He should have done something else. You can't just be an announcer. You have to be like the key grip. If you're just an announcer, like literally, he didn't even write it. What else have you done? Yeah. What else are you doing?

What are you doing? Because you should be doing nine other things. or you should be so busy with charity work. You should be so filled with charity work. Yeah, he should be like, I got to get out early today. There's an auction at Sutherby's I got to go announce. I got to do announce. I got to do these things.

That should be your whole life because you have got the golden ticket on the easiest job on the face of the planet. I bet this guy couldn't even fucking do a horse race. I already did this today. I've already yelled about this today. So let's get back to this. I'm glad you did it for me. So there are two different incidents in Texas. in daycares that are...

This week alone. This week alone, where the first one was in Fort Worth. This is the bigger one, it seems like, at the Arca Montessori Academy in Risinger. I think it's kind of interesting that it was at a Montessori school when that's like... Supposed to be better, right? That's like the liberal nice school, right? I have no idea because... I refuse to learn.

But I think Montessori school where like the cards, like the paper doesn't have edges. I know Sina wanted his kids at a Montessori school, so I imagine. Imagine that's better. Yeah. Yeah. No, it kind of depends. You know what? It's kind of like a, I don't know, like a Del Taco, right?

Like, there's some in some good parts of town and some Montessori's that don't have good del tacos. It's going to be like a Del Taco. Yeah, yeah. It's very franchised. This one's definitely bad. This one's bad. Because they were making the four-year-olds fight each other.

In like a ramshackled fight club sort of situation. This is my question, right? I don't think it was organized enough, though. Yeah. If it was... There's no money changing hands, I don't think. If it was more organized, would that it be okay? No.

No. No, no, no. If they got the parents involved and they, and they were about fighting training. If there was like an ambulance on hand, that might be nice. I guess just a school nurse. So would you like grab the eye? Because the thing is they hurt, the workers hurt the children, which is really sad, right? They made the children hurt each other kind of deal.

Now, we don't know why. right or was it like a whole like punishment thing that she was trying to get them to do to each other? I mean, we can hypothetical the shit out of this, but the fact is they had two kids fight each other on purpose in front of them and it's on camera. So you're saying that there's no, you're trying to say that there's no reason that would work in this scenario. I would say if you want to give them a nice way of doing this, you could say that they were trying to teach the kids to stick up for each other, but even that is a bad thing.

How about that? I'm going to agree. I'm going to be the tiebreaker here because it is very true. I saw that video and like even when I saw it, I was like, it's not as bad as they frame it to be, but it is still very, very bad. Well, it's the fight club that's the bad part I think. But the thing is, like, is it really a true fight club or is that a headline? It's not a true fight club. Yeah, like I didn't see any banners or text messages or span the emails about it.

Yeah. Don't you understand the first rule about a fucking fight club? What's the second rule? I don't actually don't know. The second rule is the first rule. Yeah. The first rule about fight club, you don't talk about fight club. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, so they can't. Why do you trust a three-year-old with that? Because three-year-olds can barely speak. No, no, they can. Yeah, but who believes a three-year-old unless they're saying something awesome? Well, these are four-year-olds. Oh, they can really speak. Yeah, but they knew that this had been going on for a while.

Oh, great. Then they're ready for Jim Thornton. Yeah. Honestly, this might be a good job. It's actually now that I'm thinking about it, you might want to teach these four-year-olds to fight just in case they have to fight a wheel of fortune announcer away from them. Well, that's what I'm going to tell you right now.

I don't, like, someone who worked with kids for over 11 years and all that stuff, I would never have children fight each other ever. But, as I said, the parents, I would totally have a parent fight a child. But, no, not just one child. A fucking army of children. You were made of children. Well, can I ask you straight up from the amount of... How old were the kids you were with?

Oh, they started from two to like 11, sometimes 12 years old. Can I honestly ask you? How big of a group of them do you think you could take? Like, at one point... Yeah, like, at what point do you believe... She's not like, clearly, it's not a fighter? No, I'm asking... Throw all of the...

Throw it all. Like, it's you. They have been infected with a virus that makes them aggressive. Right? Let's just throw all logic out the window. But you have to fight all the kids. What is the most amount of these kids you think you could fight at once? Can I ask one more question about this hypothetical situation?

I haven't answered to that. Are these kids zombies? Are you worried about if one bites you, you will die? Because that changes the way you fight. I would say, let's just say, okay, you can't get a communicable disease from them. You can't get the disease from them, but you can kill them legally because they're some kind of, they've changed. Okay, cool. They're not themselves anymore.

So you can kill them. This is easy. This is very easy. It's what I would do in my job anyways. They come running at you. Like, not really tap, but you put your hand on the top of their head. You kind of turn them a little bit, and they run the other way. Seriously, that's what you can do with any child.

That's how you get them from collision. That's how you get them from hitting heads together. And you get this like Sixth Sense, this like Matrix kind of like, I am the one kind of bullshit thing, where you know when things are about to happen. And when you work with kids, you know seconds away. So that means I don't have to fight a single kid in a zombie apocalypse. All I have to do is just turn them around and be like, what's the announcer's name? Jim Thornton.

There he is. Yeah. And then they run dollars him. I'm so glad to see all of you coming here. You're going to help me. Excellent. There's nothing I love more than being consumed alive by a group of four-year-old children. I've always wanted to be in the tummy of a little boy.

Now I'm in their tummy. Oh, I'm swimming around inside the intestines of a little boy. Why did Rob give him a mic? I was born with a microphone inside of my mouth. This is what I do. It's my only skill. So you can just redirect a child. Yes, exactly.

Redirect. That's all you need to do. That. See, I would never think to that. We'll just punch them. Well, that could only help so much and then you're going to get tired and then you're going to feel bad. That's why I was asking you how much you really, I think that you're only reason. really asking us because you know from experience, the energy level of these kids, and if you think that you could actually, could you think that you could make your way

through a dozen children? Totally. You know, move them by their shoulders, by their heads, by their necks. You move them away. It is so easy. A kid will be like, okay, yeah, this way. It's good. See, I think I'd grab the biggest kid and kill them in front of all of them.

Uh-huh. Just so that they know, maybe it would discourage them. Or I'd take the smallest hostage, which is best, Teddy. I think you kill an adult in front of them. That's the best. Kids have no respect, though. But they do fear. Yeah, but I feel like if they saw an adult get murdered, they'd be like, yay, kill an adult.

Yeah, but then you're like, oh, I like these kids. Yeah, it's a problem. Now I'm on their side. Now I'm their leader. Yeah. On nowhere. That's actually a great turn of events. I actually don't mind this.

Yeah. Now they're mine. Release. Release. And just send them to places. Go to various parts of the country. Release. Yeah.

Do you have a weapon you would use against children? A weed whacker? Weedwacker. Also, I think... Sickle works? Nunchucks. Nunchucks. I say shovel.

A good... Can I get out of this episode? Yeah, I would want to... How do I do that? It's the idea of, like, if I'm hitting kids, I want to be able to hit multiple at a time. Big long stick. Well, either way... Hit him with a car.

Like, you do the... You know, when you're doing circles in a car, you can do a lot of... Those kind of things? Well, the Montessori School is not responded for comments. No, no. They're about to be a Kentucky fried chicken in a minute. Are you kidding me? And then fights there are normal. Honestly, then it's fine. Yeah. So long it's just a water burger. Or your local McDonald's, by the way.

Yeah. The other daycare, this woman is facing up to 10 years in prison for making one child bite another child's arm. Now, we don't know why, though, again. I really want to see. She held the arm and then held the head. Made the child. Bike the arm. The child's like, I don't want to bite the arm. bite the arm. I don't want to bite the arm. She made him bite the arm. It's all on camera. Really? Yeah. I wonder what the reasoning was. Seems like she just wanted to punish the child and didn't want to hit her himself.

That's my theory. It was a theory that I had. So she tried to use the- She's trying to weapons this. Yes. That's what I think happened in this situation. She thinks she's weapons. That's kind. She thinks she's weapons. I honestly think that that's a good idea. Yeah. Yeah. Have the kids fight this. Obviously, that fixes the whole thing. have the kids fight the other kids.

Have them all police each other. Yeah, that's what she was trying to do. It did not work. She's getting 10 years. Oh. Yeah, I know. In the footage, it's alleged that Garrett took one child's right arm and put her own hand on the back of the other girl's head. Police claimed that she physically manipulated the girl's head by forcing it down while raising the other child's arm into her mouth.

So she was doing, she did the whole thing. It's a lot of work. It is a lot of work. But it is still hitting down. She's hitting two kids. you was just trying to make one happen. You see, you got to put a bunch of, you got to put soap in a sock. Ten years is actually,

I'm going to say, ten years is actually pretty steep for some way. That's a wild amount of time. I mean, like, none of them on the list are in jail. I think about that. I also... Child endangerment can get you a pretty stern sentence technically. Hey, I worked with kids for 11 years, especially in Central Park, Prospect Park. I have

never once lost a kid for more than a minute. Those are good New York kids. I think New York kids don't get lost. I think that if you brought a fucking like Madison, Wisconsin kid out there, you'd lose one. I think a New York kid knows what's going on.

A little bit more. They're a little bit more aware. I found them and just quickly was like, I'm sorry. I don't know anybody. I'm sorry. It was 2011, no one cares. Well, I understand, Carolinas, why didn't you just use the standard muster runaway?

You know what? Or grab another kid that looks like, yes, I know. Oh, you know these runaways. Because it's like you've got to get used to say in that. Well, you know these runaways. You know how they are. They're always packing a bindle. These four-year-olds are always on their way out. They love the open road.

That's something actually should be taught in schools. How to make a bindle. You never know. You never know when you're going to hit the road and get out of there. You have to be molested by a homeless man in order to learn a gag's abilities. I'm saying second grade. How do you make a bindle? Bindle week.

It's a handkerchief. You need a stick and a handkerchief and a lot of cool things. Well, what you do is you put stuff inside the handkerchief and then you tie it around the stick. Yeah, and you hit the road. Yeah, kids love the road. But what do you put in there? Whatever you need. Bullets.

I imagine kids would be like toys, macromachines. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Some fruit snacks and, yeah, yeah, a red bowl. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ecro cooler. Yeah. You could still get Ecto cooler now. I know, that's why I said it.

You can buy it off eBay. Yeah, ecto cooler is so popular. I don't think it's popular, but it still exists. Crystal Pepsi. And it'd be like, which way to the nearest Montessori? And like I always kind of put go in the bindles Kind of what goes like what I steal in Baldersgate 3 Where it's a lot of like

Cheeses Hard sausages That's what I'd put in a bend of it I don't want to hear about Baldersgate 3 I know Carolina doesn't I love my Balders cafe Well you watch you watch Marcus play video games I'm a watcher

I'm actually one of those watchers where I go like It's been a while since you played video games Because I like comment I like doing the commentary Oh, really? No, no, I enjoy it. Natalie, watch me plays. All the time.

Eldon Ring, Dark Souls 3 is constantly. Like, he's like, supposedly the hero in the story, right? He's killing everybody. And I'm like, are you going into someone's house? And he's like, yeah, they're demons, but you're going into the demon house. And he's like, yeah, and you're killing them while they're just standing there. He's like, yeah. And I was like, and you're the good guy?

This is all helps the game. You know why I like watching people play video games? I remember when I used to watch everyone play like, uh, what was a Mario Carlin? and Halo and Golden Eye all night. You know what's really great about watching all that shit? They don't pay attention when the blunt's going around. I can take extra hits.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm like more stone than everybody. So they play in this stupid fucking game. I'm fucking out there stealing all the wheat. Yeah, it's a good point. That's really, really smart. Thank you. It's been a whole summer playing Golden Eye. Oh, no odd job, no map. I'll play against you anytime. Oh, God, it's been a while. Yeah. It's been a fucking long time.

But yeah, Natalie was a little disappointed because she saw me on a date in BG3. Oh, really? Show me had a lot of sex. Oh, really? Because I'm not having sex with Carlack. You're doing that right there in your own living room? It's a video game.

We're open only for Boulderski 3. Yeah. We have an open marriage for me to date, Laisel. Is she okay with this? She is not, she says she is, but I do see a little anger. You know, like, she is okay with it. She knows it's not real. Yeah.

But she also is just like, why are you saying such nice things to that woman? You know, that's a good point. That is the thing, yeah. You should call her a whore and a homewrecker until it would get the fuck away from me. Or instead, maybe, okay, that's another way to go by it. Call her a fucking homewrecker and get out of here, trying to destroy my house.

But that's how you lose the game. Yes. Yeah. No, I'm trying to see those tits in the game. You can also just be like, I'm going to treat my queen like a queen. I do. No, no, of course you do. You definitely do.

And then I'm going to treat my video game queen like a queen. and in that way they never shall cross paths they will never be jealous You know what I always feel guilty about When I'm sitting there and I like my cute dog videos On YouTube and sometimes I watch them on the TV And I'm watching cute dog videos Sometimes it's an hour goes by

And the whole time there's Harley Sitting next to me I'm just ignoring her You know I feel like that's kind of like watching porn In front of your wife Get away Is she watching it with you though? I don't think so I usually whenever I look

She's staring at me like why aren't you petting me It should be kind of like porn where it gets you like pet horny. It does. Oh, good point. So then you can build up all your pet horniness and you can really pet the living fucking shit out of Harley. I really do.

I play her like she's a fucking ukulele. As he should. What else is coming up on this season of No Dogs, Carolina? Oh, man. Okay, so Link Ray. We're going to talk about Link Ray for a little bit. Have you heard of the Rumble? Nope.

No. Okay. Have you ever seen a Quentin Tarantino? movie. There's loads of songs just like that. Dun, done, dun, I can't do it right now. Browm, Blown, Boow. Rob's got it. Rob's got it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's all like surf rock.

It's got a bit of surf rock to it, actually. It definitely does. But it's more... Here we go. Yeah. Yeah, it's like rockabilly atmosphere music. You know, this is the part with Steve Bouchemi goes and bam to get out of the bathroom. And he pees all over his face and he's just laughing. Yeah, this is from Desferrata.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Exactly. I like the Link Ray self-titled albums. Yes. I'm 71. That's very chill. I like that album a lot.

It's fantastic. No, he does, like his stuff, especially his Americana stuff because he is of indigenous heritage. Oh, interesting. And so he decided to get back to like the old Americana. Just kind of be proud of his indigenous. Because when he was a kid, he would have to always pass his white during like, you know, the olden days. Oh, I bet. And then he could finally be himself at some point.

Exactly. And dressed kind of like a bit of a Roy Orbison Elvis guy. Yeah, it's like he's Roy Orbison but Native American. Yes, exactly. And he's fantastic as a musician. So we're going to totally talk about it. It's like one of my favorites. That song's good as fuck. I knew you'd love that. Oh, man. We're going to play that sometime soon. I hope. Yeah, no, we're going to talk about that. X-ray specs. We're going to talk about Jane County, the first trans-punk star of

all time, probably the best one. Cool. As of yet, you know. And we're going to really get into that. So we're going to go really crazy this year. And then next year we're going to go into like more established bands like The Clash and Black Flag and stuff like that. Yeah, that's what we were talking about, which I'm really excited for. And I'm really excited for this New York Doll story.

And I'm so glad that you guys are back. Yeah, no, thank you. And thank Rob too. Because Rob is really like the other guy. Yeah, Rob and Patrick Fisher. They really do so. much, like, to make everything so much better, and they make our show

presentable in a way that I make it kind of like, I just you know, I'm telling this stupid story, but he makes it so good. So I want everyone to check it out. Thanks very. That's very nice. That's very, very nice. Rob, get back to work! Yeah!

You ever hear Jackie Shane? No, who's Jackie Shane? Jackie Shane is like an R&B trans performer from back in the day. That was like one of the first like really like amazing trans performers. I have heard of Jackie Shane. Have you listened to her music? Yes.

Great version of money. One of my favorite versions of money you'll ever hear. With money get you what you want. But they have an amazing story. I totally get into that shit. Ooh, interesting. Okay. I like it. Yeah, they're from the 60s. Good for them. You had to be

trans in the 60s meant you have to be tough as fucking nails. Trans and black. Yep. Yes. And a lot of times... That's what people don't talk about with the trans communities, how fucking tough. you have to be. Well, that's why they're so badass.

Yes. And a lot of drag queens, a lot of trans people, they have to be super tough because what they used to do to help each other, like, roll each other up back in the 60s and 70s is that they would do a thing called

like freaking or freaking someone out, which is where they would go out in public and just be like, I'm a woman, like Jim Carrey yelling like I'm Jim Carrey kind of thing. And they would try to like make people feel uncomfortable just so they can like go back to their friends and be like, totally like stupid.

Freaking squares. Yeah, it's like a regular kind of prank, but like it brings them back and it brings them closer to their friends. And it also shows like, hey, these people are freaking out over me wearing a fucking wig. Well, that's why that scene in Pink Flamingos, I think, is one of the most powerful scenes I've seen about that. In that, it's so funny because in that one moment when Divine is walking down the street and he's filming like, he's filming from a car across the street. and it is all like captured on film like people reacting to Divine just walking down the street. Oh, that was like real? Yeah, that's all.

None of it stayed. Those are real, yeah. No, those are people like cartoons like only like mouths agape, just staring at Divine. And that's just the power, the power of transgressive like living and what they, in a positive way that they were doing as a way to show like, fuck all y'all. I'm going to live like this. No, Divine was not trans. No, they were not. But they loved dressing in women's clothing, just like Ed Wood.

And that's fine. I mean, I understand why he might call attention and everything like that, but just to look at someone like they're weird. Let me tell you an experience I had with Marcus recently. I love it. Minnesota Airport. We were at MLP. MSP. MSP.

Yeah. I'm on it. Yeah, he goes there every fucking weekend. I like it because of the print store. Go ahead. No, I love it. Big fans, big fans. Frank and Trace, guys.

So we're standing there Like trying to put in our luggage with these like you know the Delta people And then they all like their jaw stop Like just drop and they just start staring And they're just like freaking out And it's not me and Marcus But like the person that walks behind us And down the hall and they just can't help it

They're like like seriously like freaking out And it's the two women who are conjoined twins Who have two heads Yes And because they're from Minnesota And they were just just walking down and these are people who just It's a true slubs. I'm going to say I'm from

third world country. They're from third world country so they're like what the fuck was that? I will say it's fascinating. It is fascinating. It is fascinating. Yes, it is fascinating. But they're like normal people. Yeah, sure, of course. But when you watch them in real life, it is fascinating. Of course. And you can't help stare at them. How many seats are by? God damn it. I couldn't follow them that long. I wanted to. I was like

one, like you do a one? Like you do a one. Eminem's back. Well, there's one of them that's just married to one guy. Like, the other girl isn't married. The other half of her isn't married to this guy. No, she just kind of lays her dead. Wow, this guy's freaky.

She says she goes into them. From what I hear, she goes into sort of like, almost like meditative state almost. Yeah, yeah, disassociate. Yeah. I do that. I mean, as long as it's consenting.

Half the time. Half the episode. As long as Ed consents. Well, um, Heaving on top of you with my Jim Thornton quotes. I just want to make a vineyard filled with naked young boys. That's my goal. And have the naked feet of those little boys squish the grapes of the sweetest wine you've ever had. It's supposed to be aged, the wine.

Yes. I don't drink that old dusty wine. I like brand new baby wine. Toddler wine. Yum, yum, hot wine down my throat. Just like a liquid child. Thank you, Jim. And you will win a brand new Mitsubishi Tatanga.

Here's a trip to Greece. That's my favorite place. To shop for little boy's underwear. Nobody makes coverings for a little boy like the Greeks. So these can join twins. I'm sorry. These can join twins. They are, just so you know, they're teachers.

Really? Yes. They teach children. They teach children. That's really amazing. Also, kids are just wildly accepting. Yes. Kids will ask you like three inappropriate questions and then move on.

I think that's great. Yeah. They're teachers. It's great. It puts them in front of people. Actually, I've been kind of not obsessed, but like every like five, six years, I read an article about this. No, this is not. I don't know I think any of this is real about their guts.

They have to pee at different times. Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah. I don't know about their... So they have separate bladders. That's one thing I remember. Because I remember watching them since they were like eight years old.

Like, I think we're about the same age as them or something like that. I've been watching them. They have two hearts. Yeah. So they are... Okay, thank you, Rob, so much. Okay, this is fantastic. Two parts.

They beat as one. Three longs, two hearts. Okay, this is interesting. That's a lot of parts, man. But the thing is that, like, they got it all together. And I'm just one person. Yeah. And they impress me.

in the way that they could get to their gate. Well, I don't need you flexing on me. Okay? I don't need this. I don't hear, oh, I'm a conjoined twin and my life's fucking great, right? I know I'm a fucking, my whole life's amazing and I'm still angry, right? But I don't hear about it. I got a question.

Can one die and not the other? It doesn't last very long, unfortunately, historically. Okay. As long as I look, it's like a day or week. The way it seems to be there's no physical reason that they necessarily die, but it's almost like they can't live without the other. I think it was, I don't know if there's not a physical reason, but I do imagine if a part of your body is necrotizing,

then maybe that will affect the rest of your organs, unfortunately. Or like maybe we'll try to like compensate. None of us are doctors. This is what we're guessing. Organ failure just leads to more organ failure and then eventually you die. Exactly. Conjoin necrotizing, though, is an amazing name of a band or an album. Can join necrotizing?

I get more for an album. You're an album. Like, yeah, like, that's what Temple the Dog should have been called. Yeah. Cojoin necrotizing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. When Soundgarden and Pearl Jam got together, that was conjoined necrotizing. That's fucking awesome, actually.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Done by two-headed lady. Yeah. And what thing I know? She, two-headed lady, that's a good band name. Two-headed lady, yes. Which is a great song by Rocky Erickson, two-headed dog. Wow.

That's true. Very true. I'll see here. See, we learned a lot today. Thank you so much, Carolina, for coming in. I don't think you could ever. stop learning. No. No. I refuse to stop learning. I refuse to stop learning and growing.

That's good. Every day I mature into this. No Dogs in Space is back. Go be a part of it. Make yourself smarter. Make yourself cooler. Go listen to No Dogs in Space. Impress your friends. Watch it on YouTube. Watch it on YouTube. LPN TV. Hell yeah. Go check it out. Well, it has its own YouTube channel. That's right. It does. Yes. On No Dogs in Space. Go check out our That's right. We've been working on this. Go fucking check out our new YouTube channel through. You can get it from last podcast on the left.

So go in there and find it. Totally. And check out a bloodbath as well. Yes, please. It's on LPN TV. That is an LPN TV. 1977 bloodbath. I did a lot of the research for that season and I am in two episodes. It is fantastic. So check that out. I make a tiny appearance as well at a great time.

I love that. I re-did my characters, the sheriff or whatever the fuck. You guys tell me I am. You did a good job, Eddie. great. He's a really good job. I can yell at my friends. I know how to do that. It's a good job. Yep. It was a wonderful time. I love everything that's going on here at the network. I'm so proud of all of us.

There's so many great shows. Watch the brighter sides hit in 600 episodes this week. Holy shit. Congratulations. I wish I could swim in a pool filled with the soiled underwear of little boys. Yes. That's fantastic. And we're going to try and get holding this guy's job. That's the other thing that we're going to try to get them. Yeah, we'll make Holden a new announcer of Wheel of Fortune. So he's doesn't have to work here anymore.

Yeah, we can get them out. Yeah, but yeah, go check out all the great shows here on the last podcast network, the forum report, page 7, uh, brighter side. Major Ned Gabby's Lysb by guys and Laving, you know, listen to the show at every. You can also see last stream on the Love Live Live every 5 p.m. PSD every Tuesday. Every Tuesday, you need it. That's right. And you can watch us on Netflix.

Yeah. Please watch us on Netflix. We'll have a lot of fun there. And then this Sunday, the 27th of November, I'm going to be in Milwaukee, the Laughing Tap, having a lot of fun. I'm going to a wedding and then I'm going to go to do this show on my way home. You're playing the wedding as well? No, no, no, no, no, no.

I'm going to sit in the corner in silence. Cool. But the show's going to be great. I got Logan Metz from Promises the Real Playing Piano, Tom Goss, great comedian. We're going to have a lot of fun here at the Laughing Tap in Milwaukee. And then the week after that, I'm going to be in Denver. Comedy Works, the early show sold out, so I still got tickets for the late show on October 4th. It's my birthday.

Come and hang out with me there. and then Henry and I, we're going to Brooklyn. Side stories. At the fucking Warsaw. No, when are you guys going? October 9th. We're going to be at the Warsaw. Rob's going to be there.

We're going to be there. Okay, we're going to go. Come, Hank, come watch a show. I'm inviting all my comedian buddies. I put a bunch of people on the list. We're going to have a lot of fun at this show. Oh, that's fun. I can't wait to see that.

Yeah, Joy L. Johnson's opening for us. It's going to be a lot of fun. Can't wait. And then on the 11th of October, Henry and I are headed to Hartford, Connecticut. We've got a show there. Side Stories is back on. the road, baby. Redway, California, October 24th. November 14th, Portland, Maine.

Sold out. You can't go. You got to go to Burlington, Vermont. I'm going to be there with my oldest friend, Nitzberg. Yeah, my buddy, Jeff Netsberg. Hopefully he's coming. Yeah, he better come here. I'm going to hang out. I might hang on an extra day. You should do it. In Vermont, because I never go, and it's beautiful. Try the cheese and try the gays. I love the gays. In Vermont. You know what I like, though? Honestly, truly, best beer I've ever had is in Vermont. Really? Yeah.

I can't wait. Syrup. Get the syrup. Get the syrup. I heard about that too. You know what? I'm a drink Bernie Sanders blood. Yeah, let's kill him.

That is syrup. Iowa City. December 11th. Columbia, Missouri, December 12th. And I have lots of stand-up going all around. I got Los Angeles. Pasadena. St. Louis, Denver, Albany, Rochester.

We're fucking hitting the road. What's he avoiding at home? What is he avoiding at home? Nothing. I bring Julie with me half the time. And she opens for me. It's going to be a lot. A lot of fun.

Incredible. Save Christmas for us. You guys are going to be doing Carolina and Marcus' house Christmas. All right. I love it. We're not going anywhere for fucking Christmas. That's our goddamn circle.

I leave time for New Year's. It's a lot of fun. So don't... Enjoy. Live every day, knowing for a fact if you've had sex for a dog, you can apply for the FBI. That's right.

And know that you can laugh for way down to arrest and other people for beastiality and letting them go because you love bestiality. So just love, laugh the fact. you're going to love the

for the day that you can finally legally have sex with the dog because you are a member of the FBI. Imagine getting hired by the FBI the day after that report came out and then everyone would be like, so you fuck dogs? Oh, you must love to fuck dogs then.

There better be a bunch of dogs then. There are new FBI in the East. There's nothing I would love more than a to recreate Neverlands Ranch with a bunch of naked little dogs. So please Investigate all the new FBI agents for fucking dogs I think that's what happened

We could, yeah, I think first Shaq loves it So Oh, imagine Shaq fucking That'd be a It's more Eddie No

No He does it to bears Let's get out of Shack fuck bears Let's get the fuck out of here I'll see you guys later The horse will be dead We gotta stop

It has to stop It has to stop