Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: A Tale of Hit & Run

Episode Date: May 16, 2024

This week on Side Stories - Eddie returns! Panera finally discontinues "Charged Lemonade", Las Vegas Alien footage deemed "undoctored" by experts, The Unich Maker sentenced to 22 years, Houston man mowed down before being stabbed and kissed by killer, Minnesota man accused of googling ‘Widow’ days before poisoning wife, Listener E-Mails, and MORE!

Can you believe? Last podcast on the left is going back on tour. The road leads to here. JK Ultra. It's coming to these North American cities. We got Denver, May 16th, Seattle, June 8th, Washington D.C., July 13th, Chicago, Illinois, September 14th. October 16th, we got Boston, Massachusetts, November 2nd, right here in Los Angeles, California.

And then on December 7th, we're going home to Brooklyn for our show at the King's Theater. Yeah, Brooklyn, baby! It's time for you to laugh again and open your fucking eyes. Yeah, at the King's Theatre. Yeah, look at the babies! It's time for you to laugh again and open your fucking eyes. Yeah, at the same time. Roar! Roar! There's no place to escape to.

This is the last hot cast. On the left. Science stories? That's when the last on the left. Sign stories. That's when the cannibalism started. Side stories. Yes. Hmm. Ah, coffee. I don't care. The doctor keeps telling me to stop half of it. I don't care. My coffee is from five days ago.

Whoa. I put it in the fridge. I made you buy it for me and then I didn't drink it. You've got to be careful. And then I put it in the fridge and I let it go and now it's today and I'm drinking it and I like it. It tastes fine. Mold grows. It's cold brew.

It's brew cold, stay cold. I think I'm okay. Have you seen now they can do it with sound waves Cold brew they're doing this whole thing with sound brew that with the second sound brew I've been trying to do it. I went into the local coffee shop that we know I yelled at the coffee for a while Honestly The local coffee shop that we know. I yelled at the coffee for a while. Honestly, it got colder and everyone there, yes they asked me to leave, but at the same time they applauded.

Afterwards they were like, what an incredible show. Are you someone I should know? And I was like, if you were gonna know, you would have already, you missed the boat, my friend. I'll see you in the bathroom. Eww, eww, eww, eww. And then I belaimed myself in front of all of them. That's. I'll see you in the bathroom. Blah, blah, blah, blah. And then I beleamed myself in front of all of them. That's what I've been saying recently as well.

I gave them a belee. Yeah, you better belee-me. Blah, blah, blah. Welcome to Side Stories. What a great way to start. My name is Henry Zabrowski. I'm sitting here, back again with Ed Larson. That's right, I'm back, baby.

I'm back. Thank you, Marcus, for filling in for me for a week He loves it. He does love he loves it. He literally told me he loved it He did it was excited about of course, but you uh, it was gonna be sad news I started some conspiracy theories accidentally that's cool not wanting to talk about the fact that ramble was very sick Yeah, he was in death's door. That is that is eddie's dog. Those people have like sent sent me Reddit threads about how I'm in prison. Yeah. And honestly, it would be great for the show.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But we actually had a very well-behaved trip to New Orleans, except for Marcus's paranormal experience. Now, you skipped the paranormal trip. Yeah, I went to the concert. You put me in the middle of New Orleans during Jazz Fest. Yes.

And you're like, we're going to go talk to ghosts. And I'm like, yeah, it's jazz. This is, you see, it's hard. It's the best jazz in the world. I understand. I'm like, these guys are dead. They had their chance. Well, the.

Kermit Ruffins is here in a line. Hey, buddy, it's reboot season. OK? We're bringing the ghosts back. It's called In the Life IP. Now, if there was a trumpet playing ghost. Oh, sure. I'm in. Yeah, I mean, that would be very lucrative

for French Quarter phantoms. Yeah, it'd be very haunted mansion. I would say for the upcoming series, we'll talk about it this week, but we're working on another long form series, which I think is gonna be really interesting and also fucked up. But the concept of, you know,

of course you're going to make money if there's ghosts. If ghosts are real, that's going to be an extremely lucrative business. You know what I mean? Yeah. But who owns the ghosts? The ghosts, but the ghosts don't know how to monetize it. But that's the thing. So are the ghosts on these ghost tours, slaves. Whoa. Holy shit. Interns. Yeah, yeah. That's how you flip it. You flip it. All right, we have a couple of updates.

Number one. Rambo's alive, by the way. Rambo's alive. Barely, barely. But he's alive. He's alive. So Eddie, wish me luck here. Eddie had asked me for a recommendation

for a dog executioner and I offered myself. I said I can come over there, he won't even know. I'll draw him in his sleep. Yeah, I was like, well I don't want bite marks on him. And you're like, ooh over there, he won't even know. I'll get Rodham in his sleep. Yeah, I was like, well, I don't want bite marks on him. And you're like, ooh. Ooh, I want some way to it. Ooh, I want to suck your dog blood. That's how I get through it.

But I'm glad you're here, and he's OK for now. Yeah. But we do have some updates. We went to the Museum of Death, and I saw the Kvorkian chamber, and it got me a hit hard. Oh, about to say, I thought you were saying it got you hard. No, no, no, it didn't get me hard. Yeah, I thought you were just like, oh, check, I got him.

I had done Ben hard. Yeah. But I'm glad. We're bringing you more into the true crime realm. You're learning. You understand that instead of having fun on vacation, you're supposed to go see bad things. It's so funny. I show up to the Museum of Death, Henry's birthday, and I literally walk in to get us tickets, you understand that instead of having fun on vacation, you're supposed to go see bad things. It's so funny, I show up to the Museum of Death,

Henry's birthday, and I literally walk in to get us tickets, you know, because it's his birthday, he can't buy for tickets. And I go in there, I'm like, I got Henry Zabrowski out there, like who? Exactly. I was like, ew, maybe it'd be kinda cool, your last podcast and I left, like,

oh, yeah, I think I heard of that. Hey man, that's what I take. My favorite is the, what do I know you from? And then you have to sit and list your various credits as they just go, no, not that, no, not that. Isn't it always Wolf of Wall Street? No, I mean, no, it's crashing sometimes. Okay. Hey, crashing, and then last podcast.

But yeah, but then, you know, then it always turns into just being like, you're the guy that tried to fuck my wife or you like say something me like that's not Alright so updates in a sad move that shows the weakness of the corporate state Panera bread has blinked They were moving the charge lemonade because it has caused it has led to several deaths, but that is on out. That's on us Yeah, these is this is what happens guys if we don't react in the proper way if we don't drink so it's caffeine lemonade It's extremely caffeinated lemonade. There was a lot of discrepancy about how it was Advertised how it was put out Red Bull killed the monster energy drink Panera bread That's what I'm saying is they're weak they They backpedaled. I never like Panera bread.

I'm not a Panera bread person either. This is not, they're not for me. No, I know. But also at the same time, they do make sandwiches to order. So that's, that does technically put them above some of the other. And they have gas stations. The fact that they have murdered as well by a drink also in my realm put them up a rung in the fast food world. Oh they've killed people before.

All this bread and the diabetics that go in there. They do it to the side. You know how many people choke on soup? They wish it were killing more. Oh yeah. They wish they were killing more. But this is a, but they can't do it directly and they've been so mad about it for so long. They've been doing it indirectly

Slyly for so long and this makes them so upset because all they wanted to do is murder now They got a chance to do it They did it with a charged lemonade but Panera Bread saw that it was too powerful for us to handle That's why we can't have nice things. It should have been 18 and older for the lemonade Got so much more money that way. 21 and older. You bump it up. You want the fucking lemonade? You go, it's dangerous. It's charged, baby. I don't think you can handle the lemonade. That's right. You don't want this. That's how you market it. Yeah. That's how you lean back in being like, I don't even think we should sell this. Whoa, we should probably

stop selling this. Yeah, two more lemonades. Exactly. That's where Panera bread got their asses handed to them by the American public. They should fucking sell it to Chipotle. They'll take it. They're all in bed together. They're all owned by McDonald's. It's the same company. They should just move it over to Chipotle. People are already shitting and pissing and puking and fucking Chipotle. Unfortunately is the it is the thinking man's slop. Yeah. And it has branded itself. Mexican food by McDonald's.

Yes, and they act, they're like, oh, it's free range. And it's just like, cause they make it all like whatever, but it is just diarrhea fuel. You can't tell me no one's kicking those chickens. They need charge lemonade. Yeah, they need, they could really use it. Chipotle, we're looking at you. Charge the lemonade. You know what you need?

Turbo horchata. Charge the horchata. Why not? They need they can you play we're looking at you charge your lemonade. You know what you need turbo or chata Charge your chata Why not put a taurine in it turbo or chata sounds fucking brutal Your beans So in a moment of corporate weakness People are always saying about how uh, in a moment of corporate weakness, uh, people are always saying about how we're in a corporatocracy, but this shows how these pussies will jump anytime we fucking get together and tell them to jump.

So that's what we got to do. Who we embed with now. I don't know yet. I'm going to find out who brings out the next drink that kills people. Yeah, I'm ready for that. That's what I want. I want to be with those guys. Acid bills.

I want to be with them. Again, it's a type of carelessness that I love. for that. That's what I want. I want to be with those guys acid bills I want to be with them because again, it's a type of carelessness That I love my grave and then Another big update so we covered this when this came out. Okay, very briefly the Las Vegas Alien story. Oh, this happened last year. I like this one. No, there's obviously was the bunk to all hell But people didn't like it, but the fucking that we see the spaceship in the cop video. Well, this is where it takes an interesting turn because we've had a lot of very public UFO kind of like, I don't know if it's hoaxes, but things going in and out. Like right now we have the one big wave was with

David Grush, the whistleblower, and he was all over the news and he was talking to the US government and now He's wrong because he's still alive But things like Aero and all these various places that are looking to talk to him like all the Aero all the other like weird Things that are not atip like there, but he's just not showing up So we're getting into a place where is David Grush out of story? Is he trying to do getting into the production world like Tom DeLong did, where they just started making television shows? I don't know, but that kind of rose, fizzled out.

The Peruvian alien mummies rose up. A lot of people still been talking about, they are kind of, the jury is out on whether or not they are real or not. They are obviously, they might not be aliens, but there's some people thinking that there's some form of baby month mommy that they were made back in the day and that

they they could had his bones in them. Okay, I don't know it could be like an owl palette but for babies, it's a mommy. It's a mummy but it could be constructed and we so we don't know that's kind of it's a weird hazy place we don't know what's what's a hoax and what's not and this is another one of those stories that came out at the same exact time last summer Yeah, or this Las Vegas family now They reported that a UFO crash in their backyard or close to their backyard and they saw two we are now saying two entities Behind a tractor from where they were living they were living in this kind of like, and so they had a piece of farm equipment. Yes.

And so we know that the son of the family went to YouTube. This was on April 30th of 2023. So almost a full, like we're almost at a year. And the son had made a whole video explaining the things that he saw. He actually then redid it recently due to this new news. So one of the things that made this story so compelling was that there was a piece of dash cam footage, body cam footage from a police officer where you saw a light, a blue

light streak across the sky and land somewhere in the neighborhood. That looked cool. It does look cool. And it looked real as fuck. Yes. There was also video from the family that saw these entities in their backyard where you see them panicking Discussing amongst each other. What the hell are we looking at? You can kind of hear the worried tone in their eye

And then there's a video where you kind of see over one of the family members shoulders where you see something that is not Unlike a fart in a night vision camera. Yeah, it was like it was a blurry a fart in a night vision camera. It was like, it was a blurry shadow-like creature that they're saying is absolute proof that the aliens were in this backyard. Now, I don't know, but the thing that makes now the story, the update that has come in is that they have went, I guess experts in video editing have went

and looked at the body cam footage. They've went and looked at the footage that was sent in by the Las Vegas family that saw the fucking aliens and they completely believe it was not doctored so whatever it is what they got was real but we just don't know whether the story as a whole is real so now that family is like the footage could be fake but it wasn't digitally altered it wasn't digitally all there could be a guy in a suit or something like that but if you can still see something in that video because I tell you I don't see jack shit Yeah, I've looked and looked and looked and looked I've done it stone. I've done it sober

Yeah, that one that's the one that gets me Well, this was the one that really made a lot of people like they thought it was interesting because you saw these cops I've scared ass cop they were spooked. They went to do really didn't know what the hell was going on. They went to go look at it. They didn't want to be involved. Specifically, you hear it in their worry. When you hear, you hear it in their voice when you're talking to the family. That's why I believed it. A little bit. Yeah. At least they're like, well, something's going on. And now you're having experts weigh in and say, well, the footage wasn't faked. So whatever happened is extremely mysterious. The sun came back out and did another UFO like little breakdown, like he talked more

about his story. His story has not changed. Isn't there something weird about him? Like, didn't he like try to be... He went straight to YouTube. So there are a lot of people that want to say, well, he tried to capitalize on this story immediately. But isn't that what you're supposed to do if you get footage of an alien?

Don't you go straight to YouTube? It's the internet, Eddie. You're they are angry no matter what the fuck it is that you do. If you caught alien footage with your cell phone, I would spray it everywhere. Everywhere. I would show it to everyone. You would all call me every of course. Last but not least, the exclusive and then exclusive. And guess what else would I get?

I would get torn to pieces. I'd be called either a CIA op or I'd be called a moron or Or yeah, of course every day about everything No, it doesn't your life wouldn't you know it? It would objectively get worse I would show alien footage and then it would be destroyed from every angle and then I would be destroyed from every angle And then you get pulled into the UFO world and also I'm gonna have to hang out with dr Stephen Greer and act like he's like my buddy and I'm after all of a sudden I'm at a MAGA rally like that's like what happened. I'll still hang out with you when you're crazy

No, I mean, but I want to go and fun crazy. Yeah, just bump me back Into I don't want to be conservative crazy. I just want to be you can be eccentric. Yeah. Yeah. Because I don't care about politics. Yeah. So it doesn't get it all the way in there. Yeah. So then I'll never be that type of crazy. But my goal is to dress in one color for about 25 years and be almost unable to speak to man. You really need to just get the David Ike jumpsuit. I have been pricing. You've been pricing it?

Yeah, I've been looking at them. Okay, good. But this video is, everybody wanted to come out and debunk this because it does seem really outlandish and it does seem like maybe this kid's trying to get attention. But I will say the videos that when he expresses himself and he's talking about the story when he says like what I saw it it's pretty compelling because he does have a lot of emotion behind his voice he does seem really scared. The eyewitness drawing of the alien is very silly yeah looks a bit like Shelley Duvall and it's

not very good but again it's not it's not done by an expert. It's done by a child or a teenager. Now what intrigues me about it is the fact that it's Vegas. Now I'm coming from an idiot's point of view. Everyone knows that. Eddie, no. But see, the thing is, if aliens are coming here, why would, I mean, Vegas seems like a good spot to go.

A beacon of light in the middle of a dark desert darkness. Well, I kind of like the idea that In my mind the phenomena is half psychic in reality Like if we are dealing with these things oftentimes, I think that they are doing it through like a window Like we're being looked at like the way people inside the CVS look at you for your prescription. Yeah. Where they're sort of looking either through a thing to see us or they're kind of kind of dip in and out.

Abduction scenarios happen in a semi-permeable, semi-reality way, somewhere between dimensions, I don't know. I feel like abductions are a thing of the past. No, they're all over the place. That's 80s shit. Buddy, we're about to go to contact in the desert. I don't know like a duck tians are a thing of the past no they're all over the place 80 shit buddy we're about to go to contact in the desert you're about to meet you're about to get abducted yourself by an abductee I'm very excited it's going to happen but this story Vegas it's falling down crashing I kind of like the concept which is you know super dumb like it has there is no evidence for it.

These are the bad aliens. Yeah. The ones that crash are bad at it. Yeah. They're going to find it. They want it. They're drunk. They want to go to Vegas and party. Bad aliens. They are literally bad pilots. They're fucked. They're fuck ups. Yeah. The UFO would just end up in the lobby resort world. They're angry. I think if UFOs in these various, if it is a nuts and bolts phenomena and these various alien races have gone to such extents to make sure we don't know that they're real, they're always half gay, like in and out. The fact that every once in a while one just crashes to me just points to the fact that, well, they can't all be Michaels sometimes afraid of maybe the

alien mummies are trying to go to the Luxor and they're like why is this pyramid have a light on the top of it now we're not the other beer in a non serious place. I'm serious point of discussion because there is a the again their interdimensional they don't need lights. They don't need neon. They don't need sex workers. They're interdimensional.

I mean, but I'd rather them pay for it than take it. All I know is if they are partying in Vegas, I wanna be with them because no one was having more fun in Vegas than a series of aliens besides the group of pilots that took down the towers in 9-eleven Because that weekend before 9-eleven must have been so fun with them, man I'll tell you what man the fish was paying the sphere that weekend the world would be a different place Plays are scary man. it was fucking scary getting here man

fucking farmhouse is good man unfortunately believe it was our actions that led to 9-11 sorry like that he's laughing about that bit of truth they put in there bit of a fib I say where I don't care about politics maybe I know everything oh maybe I know everything. Oh. Maybe I know everything. You do read the news. Ask me a political question. Do I read the news? Who is the attorney general of the United States?

I have to Google it myself. Is it Paula Deen? I don't think it's Paula Deen anymore. I think she kicked her out after she said... Is that Jack Smith? Jack Smith. Plus Merrick Garland. Merrick Garland. We knew that one. We knew that one. I didn't think it's Paula Dean anymore. I think she kicked her out of Jack Smith Jack Smith Plus Merrick Garland. We knew that one. I knew that one. Oh, I don't know. I've heard his name. He looks like a pussy What is he gonna do oh my god again, oh am I gonna get audited again? Oh

Well, try to find any fucking leaks in this shit man. You try to find a fucking leak I'm look at this fucking you don't need to knock his glasses off. I mean, I think you're a good man. Mr. Garland I'm not gonna do man. You fight me did appreciate all the work you do. I don't know what you do You know locks people up. Yeah, well fucking hate that. Yeah. Well, you know some of them don't fucking arrest me, dude Yeah, well, okay Antagonizing them. I'm not antagonizing them. I don't know him. Yeah, I don't know this man. Yeah, I know That's what I'm saying, but but you don't know him. You don't need to know trivia to know things Yeah, I mean that's trivia, but I know bigger better things than that. I know more important But I know bigger, better things than that. I know more important political ideas than that.

It's not about names and places and dates. That's not what politics is. Politics is being amongst the people and knowing the people. Like how Panera Bread does not know the fucking people. I know the people. I'm sure Merrick Garland could suck down a fucking charge lemonade. I bet he fucking sucks five dicks each morning. I don't know, not with those tiny lips.

I know, because whoever's dicks he's sucking ain't smiling. Yeah, they're getting lots of teeth. Yeah. Am I supposed to be rooting for him? Do we like him? I think we like him. He was whatever. We like him enough anyway. I don't know, whatever he is. I mean, they all suck.

Hey, buddy. You know, I mean, even the ones I like I hate. Just for the record. The only... Oh yeah, I hate. Same, same. I think even the ones I like I hate just for the record the only oh, yeah, I hate Same I think that the more I like vote for this guy like know that I don't like him Oh, believe her, you know, I'm just saying that because the other person terrifies me. Yeah, if I like a politician I want them to do they better act like a fucking train dog. Yeah All right, that's all they are. You're a little fucking Merrick Garland.

You're a little fucking dog. And you're supposed to do the shit you need to do. All right, look at Jan Arino. I remember her. Oh, yeah. She used to get stuff done. Look at that. That's a fucking thick-ass fucking woman.

And that neck, man. That fucking neck can get anything done. You can fucking punch her in the face, and she'll still go to court. She'll laugh her ass off. Yeah. She'll be like, oh, yeah, you want to do it again? I like the taste of my own court. She'll laugh her ass off. Yeah, she'll be like, oh yeah, you wanna do it again? I like the taste of my own blood.

I don't know, dude. I don't know who these people are. She fucking eats herself out whenever she was on her period, I heard. She was so tall. It's crazy, I heard that too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I heard, you know, eight-year-old pussy.

She would get a Diva Cup and then she would take little shooters all day long. Yeah, she would have her own pussy blood. Yeah, I heard that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I fucking heard that crazy. Yeah, man. Fucking, Yeah, yeah, yeah. I fucking heard that crazy. Yeah, man. Fucking, meanwhile, Bill Clinton's there smoking,

fucking a cigar the opposite way. Yeah. Fall asleep at a job drinking pussy blood, Jan Arino. Yeah, she had to change her last name to Reno from Las Vegas when she started drinking her own pussy blood. Guys, we're just, this is a thought experiment. All right, this is not a political podcast. Again, if you wanna know about the many varied crimes of Chad Daybell, Lori Vallow, I will explain that to you for hours.

I know Zulema, I know Ian, the Sons, I know that I know the kid, I know all the whole crew. Like I could really give you a long breakdown of anything, but I guess things that matter. Yeah. Well, I guess that's as important it was. And I feel like that's the end of our updates. Good work. I was going to do the talk about the Unic Maker, Marius Gustafsson. He just got sentenced to 22 years in prison.

Not enough for his Unic Maker moniker and his like streaming service, which is interesting. He had a Pay Per View penis cutting off channel. They would. Yep. So what they would do is very similar to, which is now very controversial, The Red Room Books by Ed Pisker, where they would talk about the the YouTube channel essentially for snuff films. He had 21,000 subscribers between 2021 and 2023 as I did not know that he had that this is so many thousands a lot 21,000 quite a bit penises get cut off. He made somewhere but he said something they believe that

he made something like $385,000 on what is technically consensual penis mutilation videos this happy jolly Santa looking man's gonna say he looks nice No, well, he had his own dick cut off and he ate it and he also Yeah, his own dick. Oh, yeah, buddy know that about him. No, he's fucking he's why he got so big. He was a eunuch Those guys get huge That's what the Dolphins need. We can start cutting the dicks off of these linemen. Is that real? I don't think eunuchs are any bigger.

Side stories LPOTL at gmail.com. Do you gain weight when you lose your dick? I think you get real big. I don't know. I don't think so because I feel like there's, it's not just so- You gotta lift weights. What else you gonna do? You can't jerk off.

I don't know. Idle hands, bro. But this guy, he froze one of his own body parts off. Yes, castrated males or eunuchs tend to gain fat and lose muscle. That's really fascinating. Yeah. Wow.

Yeah, eunuchs are big. That's why they were like bodyguards back in the day. What? Is that true? Eunuchs were bodyguards? Can I even say Eunuch anymore? For like another week and a half we can say Eunuch. But these guys, wow, I didn't know Eunuchs were often employed as bodyguards in the

Middle East and China. They were considered to be trustworthy and strong. Haven't you seen History of the World? Yeah, but I always thought that it was like a joke. No, it all has some kind of base in fact. That's fascinating. That's what makes it funny is that it all has some kind of base in fact. That's fascinating. That's what makes it funny is that there's a little bit of truth in there.

Wow. I learn every day in this job. I learn every day. Well this guy, he had many people volunteer to have their dick and balls cut off. They had hands frozen off and smashed like he did with Unit 731. That's one of the-

How much would he pay them? I don't know. I don't know. They split it with them. Like, there's not a lot of details. I wish I do want to know the ad split. Oh, we only got 100 views on your dick. I do think there's probably a we're gonna have to have a little bit of like, listen, I love you. We're good today. We honestly we love what you do here. And we want to like sponsor you and like, believe me, we all love what you do here and we want to like sponsor you and like believe me We all love when you ate the come from the recently cut off dick and balls from that priest who then committed suicide like We love that year. It was great and we honest and we all loved it. Deb loved it. Brian loved it I just are I'm just thinking that The public wasn't into it. We want to catch the wave. Do you have something that's more than Andrew Schultz?

Like, I'm looking for something more in a sort of a young teen boy demographic. Can we do... what kind of penises do young teen boys want to get... watch get cut off? Yeah, can we glue another penis to you and chop off that penis? Does the Skibbitty Toilet have a penis that they want to be cut off live?

Because I don't know, do they have exclusives? Does Skibbitty Toilet have an exclusive that they want to be cut off live? Because I don't know, do they have exclusives? Does Skibbity Toilet have an exclusive with YouTube or can we, do we get that? Does Unic Maker get that? Unic Maker, was he on, he wasn't on YouTube though. No, unfortunately no. He had his own service, which is kind of impressive. Honestly, I kind of want to, I take him as a really good example. Yeah.

Of the independent content maker. Yeah, because that's a success story in many ways. It really is. You're getting money per view. Unlike YouTube, you ain't getting shit. And he knows his audience. He knows what they want, and he just dials it right in. He can get a hold of that mailing list. You can't.

Those are fans. If they're watching Penises Get Cut Off, they like this show. Actually, I feel like these days it's more so, I feel like that's a Two Bears thing. Now do you think that, now here's a good question about people who watch Penises Get Cut Off, conservative or liberal?

Conservative, you think so? I think liberals more often than not are allowed to do the things that they think. You know what I mean? That more, it depends on, cause now liberal's a bad word because it's not liberal, it's whatever it is. Right.

The concept of you're on there, like I feel like you're a little bit more groovy. You put, you probably won't be as mad about like, you know, things going down with your penis that you didn't maybe fully expect would engage your penis, but they are engaging your penis and you're willing a little bit more to sort of like do that and be like fine with it We're like these guys that you know a lot of times they'll create whole laws to try to go after this the one like pervy thing that they are Specifically into yeah, they think in the actual research of getting this loss

They get to like legally go do a bunch of that perverted stuff like on the side and then come back and be like, that's bad. Nobody should have their asshole eaten out by a train conductor anymore. Yeah, I think we talked about this once before on the show, but the people who watch the most child pornography have to be cops. Yeah, sure. Yeah, it's whoever's... And then the content controllers at Facebook, YouTube, Gmail, like Google. Like even that gets sent to the cops. Yeah. Oh, yeah. There is a do you know that there's like a pantheon?

I wanted to write this. That's what the season two I'll let you guys know the spoiler of this. The season two of Troville was a concept we had where my character would be one of the human eyeballs because they do need human eyeballs on the extreme content that comes in. So they've been trying to outsource it all to AI bots, like bots that will catch child porn catch, like people doing

very, like, you know, torture videos and snuff films, and, but you still need a person there. What about all these eunuchs? Have them do it. But why should they be sad? Just because they don't have a penis anymore? But you still need a person there. What about all these eunuchs? Have them do it, but why should they be sad just because they don't have a penis anymore. I mean who knows Fucked up with them. I mean think if you don't if you've all voluntarily them jerking off to it Well, it's good to bet. Well, I don't think that they are but I feel like it's still hard on their brains I think that if you were voluntarily cutting your penis off and you're not in a transition position,

you're literally gonna, you're not like a super chill dude. You're not in a transition position. Oh. Yeah. I'm learning and growing. But yeah, I don't know. I've lost the point of this conversation. You know, but it felt good to really talk it out.

You know, I think it's good that we got the update section to half an hour today. I don't know how we did that. We didn't get to any new stories. These are roundtable rules, man. We see how far we can go before we actually get to stories. But you need new stories to have updates later on. They're all side stories

So they can be new ones or old ones as far as I'm concerned, but this is side stories So on side stories their main stories sure What's what's first on your dock let me see what I got here all right we have this is honestly this came in very Last minute it was right before I started recording and it actually is like, it's fucked. The story of a person that hit, okay. Tell me about this. You loosely started talking about this before we walked in here. This is a hit and run tale.

Do you like that? Do you like a hit and run tale? A tale of hit and run. It is fucked up. So a person by the name of Karen Fisher, 20 years old, this comes out of Houston. Uh, on May 3rd, Stephen Anderson was walking on a Texas street to pick up mail. The car ran him over. Now there is full-on video of this Hit and run. Was it intentional?

Watch this video. So the person is Karen Fisher. That's a suspect now If we look right here, we're gonna see in this video was caught on video and it's truly fucked up It's not just a hit and run. So the Steven Anderson as you'll see so we play this video a little bit He was like just hanging out only on 13 Deeply disturbing and shocking video of a murder in broad daylight Here comes this older guy On May 3rd the victim Stephen Anderson is walking on Woodridge Square Drive to pick up his mailman He seems alright He turns around at the sound of a screeching car speeding right into him

The car Oh yeah no Literally it went at it Aims for him The car knocks him over P pushing him further into the street Neighbors are on the she backed over calling 9-1-1. Alright, so now you see the car hit him She then backed over him right push him in the middle of the street. She's now just wandering around so she got out of her Oh, man, she started wandering around she's come up confronting people

But then in the video you see her She has stabbed the corpse multiple times where she goes and then she straddles him After he's dead after someone came out from inside of their homes and put a blanket on top of his dead body and then begins To make out with his corpse then she gets up tries to break into this car This car won't let it won't her in, she seems to be disoriented. No. I know. I don't want to go too far and say I feel like her judgment might have been impaired,

and that is when she leapt over the corpse and ran away. So she ran away. No shoes on either. No shoes on. Running down the street. Very dangerous to drive with no shoes on. It is. Because I mean, maybe at first you could say maybe the flip flop fell off, got stuck underneath

the accelerator Fucking killed a guy right? That's what I would do. That's what I'd say if I did this Yeah, and then I'd say oh, I had too much acid and digestion That caused me to stab the corpse make out with it and then flee you're trying to bring it back to life I'm just busy PR. I'm upset. That's what I would say. I was beside myself, Officer. Now, was the guy already dead when they stabbed him? Well, he wasn't doing good. And so they rolled over him twice. He was still probably in a form of a life.

She then ended his life by stabbing a bunch and then kissing him. But it's all just all done on camera. Middle of the day. It is. This is afternoon. And she definitely aimed for him. She went to kill him. It's also really strange. Just strolling up to him with the knife like that. It was just like, it was like, it was like, oh, I know this motherfucker. But it was very interesting because they did not have very much of a criminal record. The record

show that Karen Fisher was on community supervision for five years for evading arrest in 2023. then that day... I hate that charge by the way. What do you mean? If that's the only charge evading arrest, what was the arrest for? Basically what that normally means from the amount of dashcam footage I've watched is that normally it means that you have been stopped for something that is either speeding or not turning, not doing it turns into like a light, like some form of infraction. And then you have blown up the situation to where they're trumping up the charges on you, or they just don't like you. Like truly, they don't want to.

This is an opinion crime. It is. And they are a, you would have to show like a lot of times now they have the body cam footage to show it. And a lot of times they just do that to kind of bumpump up your bail. Yeah, because you have pissed off a police officer Yeah, because you've done something this person doesn't let's just say I'm gonna go on the limb and say the person that ran over This person Karen Fisher is a handful. Yeah, I think yeah She might be a lot to deal with because that morning she was like crack or something

I mean, it was also drugs involved I don't know Maybe Advil she was charged with assaulting a staff member at the hospital on the same day at the murder because they was just before Oh, yes Yeah, imagine being that person this person was really really and but they are being they were immediately arrested And they are being held on a two million dollar bond. I don't think they have it. I'm going to go ahead and say Mesa thinks. I don't think by judging by the lack of footwear, I'm going to think they don't have it.

No, I think they may not have it. I think you're right. I think you're right. But that was a very scary video. That's kind of just why I wonder. I was like Grand Theft Auto SVU. It was very, very scary and you just got to be careful out there. All right

Don't wear your headphones at night. Don't wear your headphones at night. I wear my headphones at night I love it. You shouldn't do it. It makes you mark. Does it? Yeah, I do that even with the earbuds Well, you're a big guy. I'm so big. No one fucks with me. Oh, it's kind of nice I can sometimes though the guys that fuck with the biggest guys are like true psychopaths Oh, yeah, well those guys you got to out for. I just keep myself away from them. You can see them a mile away though. Yeah, cause they're like, they got clenched fists and walking down the street all heavy.

Sometimes you have to like take a shoulder and just deal with it. Oh yeah, sure. You know, but it's fine. I can live through taking a shoulder. And now we got this, this is another fucked up story. Poison expert accused of filling life. I can't believe, this guy is so fucking stupid.

This guy, this guy this guy Connor Bowman 31 He's accused of using liquid. I believe it's coal chasin To poison his wife 32 year old Betty Bowman died in August 20th now. This was he was a medical student resident She's also a doctor right oh yes, or an anesthesiologist or something they were both on their way She was a pharmacist pharmacist okay, that's what and he was working in I guess yeah, he was a medical resident. Mm-hmm You know, he knew that I guess this was a this met this medicine that he fed to her was called liquid colchicine I believe it's the house pronounced and it was for I guess it's supposed to be for gout

But it can be fatal in high dosages and they thought that maybe they would look for it But she had gastrointestinal distress for four days And then she died which is a major sign that you've been poisoned and he said no autopsy and he wanted to cremate it Oh, of course. Yeah boom done And that's how you know same thing with Chad Daybell immediately everybody that died in the vicinity of Chad Daybell He wanted that every will everybody needed to be immediately cremated because they believe which is now I've learned from watching hours and hours of the Chad Daybell Laurie Vallow trial that they believe that the entire police

department of Rexburg Idaho had be infiltrated by demon zombies oh good yeah it's just that easy but this guy he decided aren't going to Idaho. No, that's like the last place they go I just feel like I know, you know, who's going to I don't know everyone's leave. Yeah, I love you I know Yeah, but everyone's how much Irish can you take I look Irish. Well, it's potato land Idaho potatoes Yeah, but everyone we're gonna get into a whole thing. Should we just cut this probably? Um, yeah, yeah What nine point six of population

One tenth of the people live there and I guess so that's America So got this guy was the fact that he Looked up whether or not he could list himself as a widow on Bumble and then locked in a widower like the thing cuz I get it. I bet you in his mind He's thinking I'm gonna So much pussy is gonna be jumping at my face. They are gonna think I'm Katie Lang. That's These women are not gonna let me go Right if they think I'm a widower, that's like it's like a person who watches too much porn, right? Yes guys who watch too much porn think that they're just gonna get laid the moment they're like not married anymore. Guess what, buddy?

Yeah. It ain't as generous out there as you think. We have a couple of divorced friends and it ain't pretty out there, buddy. Hold on to your loved one. Hold on to your loved one. But this is very... Two days before he poisoned her,

he looked up Can I what a widower looks like the meaning of widower how we can get on basically how we can position himself as a widower? Because then he said that he told these women that immediately connected with him because guess what it worked Yes, people are like, oh my god Like he was getting messages that were like, are you sure? You feel comfortable flirting and dating again? But it also was like six days later. Oh yeah! Yeah, yeah, yeah, he jumped right on.

It was like really soon. It was because he kept telling them, my wife, like super tragic. I was there every minute for my wife and when we helped her with an assisted death a year ago on her deathbed. Like these like super fake stories about how what a brave husband he was to help her through her last moments. The internet exists, the obituary is not even out yet. I do find that very interesting that these men really do. There's been several of these, like Chris Watts

and the story of him and his shenan wats. Like Chris Watts like legitimately thought, oh no, my mistress is going to be so thrilled to find out my wife and two children died mysteriously and disappeared. She's going to be so horny for it. She can't wait. Like this idea that like you don't think that women are private investigators. Oh, they love it.

I mean, I like it. I understand. I understand. But they look up your every movement They have said that they're like going over all your movements with their friends They're looking at multiple opinions about your move. Everybody's looking at your stuff. That's over dude You don't get to just restart. It doesn't work like that anymore. You can't just wipe out one family and build another yet Does it keep happening? Yes Does it does it do families get wiped out on a whim over the fucking just like? Literally seeing a new pair of boobs and guess what man guess where you can see new pair boobs on the internet They're all over the internet. You're gonna strip club

There's so many places you go you could just see another pair of boobs You don't need to kill your family you could go and guess what else there also is divorce guess what your force is like seems like such a better option No, no, I actually don't know but I do think that it's it's always better than murder It's always better than murder because you're not gonna get away with no not anymore. Those never over. It's over That's that 83 was like the last time divorce ain't fun either. Yeah, but again, we've said this We we've talked about this many, many times, and we'll always say it, just get in the car and leave. If you want to, if that's how you got to do it, be a man and leave.

Just go, go to Mexico. Yeah. Go to Portugal. Yeah, somewhere like that. Go to a place where you could meet a easily- Peruvian mummy town. Find an easily foolable person that wants to be with you. There's a lot of them. You can go get one. It's very, very easy. But yeah,

he killed her. Uh, we, I mean, innocent until proven guilty, but I mean, he's a poison guy and his wife died of being poisoned. And he was trying to figure out how to be a, what a widower was two days before he killed her. We're not lawyers. All right. And yeah, I'm a judge. I do. Yeah. I mean, he always, everybody's been mad. mad he killed her on Julie's birthday. I do yeah I mean he always everybody's been mad everybody's been Killed on everyone's birthday. No one's been killed on my birthday I'm sure it's been happened. I'm sure right now. I'm sure it was yeah October 5th. Homicides that have happened on October 5th I want to know a good one. Yeah, this is this is this I want to know

That's October 5th. No, no city of Long Beach.'re gonna hear I'm looking on long be sure carry on. You know Wow, Long Beach was first that came up for me as well. Yep. There we go. October 5th 1999. Dr. Harold Shipman Yep, you want trial that's somebody killed. They're we killed Harold Shipman went on trial extremely boring person for somebody who killed 300 people 15 Yeah, extremely extremely boring. Yeah. No right here murder investigation 800 block of Atlantic Avenue. This is in long This is in Long Beach traffic fatalities a couple of those Traffic fatalities happen, you know, I'm not worried about that Yeah, I think that's fine. I mean that's gonna happen

You know unless it's the woman we saw earlier running over the guy twice and stabbing him and kissing him and shit in front Of everybody that doesn't happen. Yeah, I do you know Shout out to the lady who put a blanket on him. I mean what a nice I guess Oh Joseph Goebbels died on your birthday Yeah, he committed he killed himself on your birthday That was the most out of my butt, eh? Yeah, he committed- he killed himself on your birthday! Aw, thanks! Yeah! Oh, that's a new factoid!

And his children. Aw, great! Oh, that's also when Adolf Hitler killed himself. All of his children had H names. Yeah. Heidrum, Hedwig, Holden, Helmut, Hildegard, and Helga. Like George Gorman! Yeah, he had all H children.

That's so cute. See, this is why these conversations lead somewhere. They really lead places and we learn so much. Not one Henry. Wow. He had six children with H names and not one of them was Henry. It was probably Heinrich. Yeah.

Henry, I just learned, is the ninth most popular name amongst newborns. I know. Everybody's saying Henry. And it's honestly kind of driving me insane I'm getting a little bit of a twitch from it because everywhere I go here down Henry Henry don't put that in your mouth Henry get off the man. Well, it's dude. Try having the name Ed dude anytime anyone screams it sounds like they're saying my name. Like, ah! Ah! That's what you hear. Yeah, that's what I hear.

What a horrible trap you're in. Yeah, yeah, what are you gonna do? All right, well I think that we've talked enough. Baby, Flipper died on your birthday in 1997. How did Flipper die? How did Flipper die? It doesn't really say, but one of the one of the flow to erotic asphyxiation Any incredible jammed a cork in his blowhole?

Finger in himself Ascly comes out his front Corning the trainer Rick O'Berry the dolphin that played flipper in the 1960s TV show flipper died by Suicide in his arms. Yeah, they thought about that in the cove, but that's a different flipper There was a lot of flippers. You gotta be fucking kidding me after we found covered in black blisters and beer Danny I alo the third Danny I a low the third I am getting that t-shirt made

Suicide of my birthday. Yes to real to real Happy careful out there. Yeah, so yeah gurgles. That's a good one. That's a guy really is a good one Thanks Thanks Eddie No problem. See now you get to say that forever Gordon Lightfoot died on your birthday. That's the boring Please last year have some respect. I think it was last year was last year. Yeah, I remember the memes Yeah, and then they were still trying to sell tickets to his concert like two weeks later. I'm like no No, I literally got a show of incredible like go to Gordon Lightfoot. I was like, I don't think he's coming Yeah, there's gonna play a CD just have an old man sit next to a stool and just like we'll get a couple of people They'll still think he's alive. I remember when that boat died. No one's look closely at Gordon Lightfoot for about 15 years We actually there was so much stuff we didn't get to today, but it was all animal news It was literally all animal news

So one was the bear dragging the victim from the wreckage? The guy that like they found him dragged from the car because he fucking died in the car crash of the buried his fucking remains Which is where is the Chinese zoo dying dogs that look like pandas? I mean again not a cannot it's the only place where there are pandas. I don't know should be dying dogs I actually feel like it's nicer to the pandas in a way. I'm sure I was love to get a chow and diet like a panda I think I'm gonna look at that thing. I know it's so that thing's adorable. You die Wendy's hair. Of course. No, we do I mean, honestly, I'm already getting I know I'm gonna be emails talking about like why blah blah blah

But I think what side stories LPOTL at gmail.com explain to me because I think it's actually probably better For the animals if they keep a dog Yeah me because I think it's actually probably better for the animals if they keep a dog yeah dressed if they don't have the proper enclosures and the proper treatment plans for this endangered animal the panda I think that this is actually a responsible way for people to think they have seen a panda yeah and you've yes you've seen a dog which is much easier to take care of than a panda yeah man I'm just worried with all this tick tock shit how we're gonna make China sell part of their tick-tock in America It's not gonna happen. I'm just worried here from now, but we just got our pandas back

Oh, you think they're gonna take the pandas back? I think they're gonna take the pandas back again I think good luck come and try to take our parents in the first place. We sent them back But guess what there is something on a plane during COVID where the pandas leave in San Diego You want a fucking hot war you come for our pandas all right they're their pandas we just borrow them they're on lease yeah they're china's pandas isn't that crazy edited to them with our panic economy we honestly i feel like we're already way indebted to them enough we used to have pandas i say we give those that's leverage we don't need on us i want the pand pandas. But we could go see them.

Yeah. I'm actually, and I just talked about this because I went to go see, we went to the LA County Fair. We went to the petting zoo, which was like cute and was fine. It wasn't as depressing as I thought it was going to be. But I'll see an animal on Zoom. I don't need to see an animal in person. Really?

I'll see an animal. I'll see a picture of an animal and I'm fine with it. You don't like going to the zoo? I hate the zoo. I think it's like going to the zoo? I hate the zoo. I think it's like a prison. Whoa. I hate the zoo. Well, some zoos are awful, but some zoos are wonderful.

I, I... And if you're born there, I mean, like I've lived in an apartment. Is it weird I'd rather go to a human prison? Yeah, that's very weird. It'd be kind of cool. Think about this. Instead of going to the zoo, you go to a human prison, you go to Death Row. Okay.

And you can go and you can see all of them and then you pay money for each one of them tell you their story it's a true crime podcast that's literally from the mouth of the producing you're not enjoying yourself you know how go get a hobby you're just like that's a you're just working you're doing incredible idea though right yeah yeah jail stories from the death row guys while they're in their cages. That's fun. They're so... don't call them cages. I'm just saying, when they're in death row, they can all tell you their own stories. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's fun as hell. I feel like that's way more like cool than with animals. I hung out in jail to make the jail special with Jeff. I hung out there. No, it's scary in there. It's very frightening. no one tells the truth. No, of course. No, everybody. They're all lies

Yeah, that's what we discovered for all the years. We've been covering serial killers all these guys. They don't they are The reason why you cannot trust a jailhouse confession is because it gets them out of the fucking jailhouse It gets them out of this cell. It gets them. Yeah to talk it gets them a lot more privileges so Unfortunately, they are selling it under the guise of I want to you know do something good for all the time I've spent inside but a lot of times it's because there's a lot of self-interest involved Which is why you can't you have to take jailhouse confessions with the grandson Oh for sure and also the story but that we didn't get to the morbidly obese monkey after he died

He ate himself to death and he's the cutest guy. He fucking lived a great life He lived the what life the way he wanted to and he is a big fat guy And he was on a diet But hey What are you gonna do? He died at James Gandolfini death, and I hope I'm next man That's like that was one of those things that Ronnie Dangerfield died on my birthday Wow you're still looking at who died on your birthday. No I Was looking at yours before now. I'm looking at mine now is curious. Did you see you?

Wow He ate papayas to death one of my favorite jokes is everybody wanted to work for Steve Jobs except his pancreas You hear that Not my joke. I just repeated it. That's not my joke I'm throwing it out there But I think it needs to be told as much as possible. Oh, and I also got so One little leg up before the little monkey. That is a fat monkey. He's cute. He died. Yeah, he'd aid himself to death But he went out like he wanted I'm saying like James Ganon Alfini. Yeah, he chose this life

Yeah, was his son next to him. I Don't think I think his son is long out, dude. I think that that monkey, he's living his own life. He's not concerned about childcare. Yeah. Alright, so let's do a little bit of listener emails. One thing I got was a response to a little bit of a skeptic bump against Marcus's experience with the paranormal, with the doweling rods or

what we call these two swinging things. There's a thing that is called an idiometer experience or phenomena, the idiometer phenomena, which is idea that you can, it's used in hypnotism and it's used in various other sort of chicanery processes where you put an idea in somebody's head and then they subconsciously reflect the idea. So the idea is that maybe that in the sales pitch of talking to the ghost, right, and this idea that we're setting a parameter, the doweling rods go wide when it's yes, they cross when it's no, you've been subconsciously told a part of your brain that this is what

you're looking for and you're asking questions and then unbeknownst to you consciously your hands will use the idiometer effect and it will do unconscious movements that will make the thing move the way you want it to. Oh, like a Ouija board. That's what they also say about Ouija boards. I will say I do find it interesting that the doweling rods in my hands were wiggly and in others they weren't. So I find it interesting. But they didn't move for you. They didn't do anything. And there's no chance of a motor being in them or anything like that. No, they're just a sleeve thing. You could pull it out. You look at the, it's like a sleeve,

it's like a cylinder. So it's just a metal pole. It's two metal poles. It's two metal things. It doesn't need to be plugged into anything. No, I could see how, so, but I understand that there is a, it's, you know, like confirmation bias, like all of those things. You go into a scenario expecting something to happen, it's a little bit easier for it to happen. And something like the uniameter effect might explain some paranormal communications, but I still feel like it's very, and of course we have our ardent skeptics that think that anything that's woo-wee is stupid, which you're allowed to live that

life. I know what I saw. Then why are they even listening to the show if they believe that? It's because it's both, it's all, everybody's interested. That's the weird part to me, it's like, well that's what we talk about. Well they like to listen and get angry. Oh, okay. Which I do understand, but I, like this is the type of thing where I was in the room.

It was weird in there, but I do understand that it's about it's a consciousness thing. I still believe it's a consciousness thing. I don't think that we necessarily spoke to an entity in that room that was outside of that room. What the way I look at it is I don't feel like ghosts can answer questions because they don't have brains. That's why they use our brains to answer the questions. Oh wow, I love this. Yeah dude, get a high dog. Fuck yeah man, I gotta wait till after the last dream.

Don't fucking me dude, I gotta fucking wait. Alright, I got one last little letter. Now, it's been a while since we've had poo poo news. Yeah, we feel like we could talk about it. I feel like we can have one little break. It's time for us now. I feel like enough has happened. I mean, there has to be some for us. We love Poopoo.

I just, it just comes up a lot. I'm a big Poopoo boy. I mean, and they really, like, it hits with the nephews. Oh, actually, before the Poopoo story, this actually really, maybe I should wait till Marcus to talk about the crucifixion update, is that there was a crucifixion that happened in Ireland where a guy was basically fucking with a neighborhood crew and they nailed him to a fence crucifixion style. And apparently that was very often done during the troubles. That was what's considered a paramilitary style attack.

Paramilitaries dole these attacks out for everything from repeat criminality to dealing on the wrong patch, to owing the wrong person money. These paramilitaries are a leftover stain from the troubles are now a little more than they're a little more than gangsters. Where is this? This is in Ireland. This happened to a guy. Crucifying people in Ireland. They've been doing it. Apparently that's the thing that they used to do. The man that was crucified last week was repeatedly warned by the local boys about stealing a warning and did not heed so they burned on his van and

Nailed his hands over his head onto someone's garden fence now apparently not like a real. That's not a cross Crucifixion no, it's just to offense, but still the act of nailing someone to something is called a crucifixion Interesting see I thought you had to be on a cross. I don't think so I believe that a crucifix is just a fun way to do it. Okay, you know, I mean, it's the artistic way All right so if like so if it was like a You can nail anybody to any plank of wood any plank of wood. What about like stucco or oh, yeah I mean, I don't know if it'll hold you have to put one of those lancers in there. Yeah. Yeah, definitely got it

Yes, yeah, yeah do that. Oh, but yeah, apparently they're one the more so I guess the more common way that the paramilitaries Fuck somebody up as they shoot you in the back of the knees and it's called kneecapping damn. It's not good You don't want to be in any disagreements with those guys But also it's extremely complicated topic that we don't know a heck of a lot about and take back my Idaho comments I don't know a heck of a lot about. I take back my Idaho comments. And here we are in the last little bit. Here's the poo poo story. Thank you.

I need some dookie in my life. Here's a shout out to my family in Wichita, Kansas. Please don't let this happen to you. I live in Wichita and there's a nice little restaurant near where I work in town. My coworker and I, we eat there regularly. Today we went in, we had our food, and we were about to leave when I had to go

and take a shit. Told my co-worker I would meet him back at the shop because it might be a minute. We laughed. He left. I entered the bathroom. There are two stalls and a urinal in this bathroom. One stall was occupied, so I took the other. It was mid-shit when an envelope was dropped into the ground in the stall next to me. I said, Hey, man, you dropped something. They then kicked it into my stall and said, open it. I hesitated and I said, do you need help or something? They said, yes. So I opened the envelope and said it was a hundred dollar bill and a note that said,

please do not judge me. I have a problem. Please do not flush. You can keep the money. Please do not flush. You can keep the money if you don't flush. I have a second envelope with $200 for you. If you leave your socks in the bowl. I laughed and I said, are you for real, man? He then held another envelope down under the stall to where I could see it.

I got back to the shop and the first thing my coworker asked me is if the restaurant was out of toilet paper to which I said something like that and I held up 300 bucks He didn't believe me, but I know you guys would appreciate the experience. So I don't know I doubt I mean, it's a very silly email I'd love to see the proof. Yeah, not the poop but if If it is true because were you here were we talking about that the guy? It must be so hard to be gay in Wichita. It's intense. If you're spending 300 bucks to like...

There are LGBT worlds and stuff, and there's always pockets that you can kind of go to in really intense cities and stuff like that. Like, OKC even has a really thriving LGBT community, but it's all like, you know, even though it's a very, very conservative town. But my thing is that we've had, there was the Calgary shit eater that we covered a while ago where it's that this does happen. Well, I don't think he's I mean, who knows what he's doing with it with socks? And the socks are in the toilet.

I think he's honestly, truly my imagining. You can't see it's been him just going Taking sock put on his head Jerking off a little bit then yeah That is an expensive activity. Hey, you know did you $300 worth? I know if we spent more to go see Neil Young Which is almost the same thing? Yeah, the West Edmonton mall poop eater. We've been dealing with these. So these guys are out there and then we dealt with the whole saga of talking to various

OnlyFans producers. We talked to various OnlyFans producers that talked about selling their poo poo and how lucrative it is and you know and I'm sometimes I wonder am I in the wrong business I mean I'm pooping three times a day oh if I could sell my if I could move my poop to on in a way that it wouldn't just sicken people I just feel like I mean if I'm selling my shit if you're buying my shit like you do have a problem like I think that if you what moving movement yeah that's my new business.

Yeah, that's a good name for a shit-selling business. Is it weird though, because in one way it's like, I do understand if it's from a hot girl's butt. Like if it's from a hot girl's butt, I don't want it. Yeah, I'm not saying I'm into it. I'm just saying. I mean, if I have to play with shit,

I'd prefer it to be from a hot girl's butt. But why is that? Why is, because it is still shit. Well, a big fat sweaty man, I mean, my shit, I mean, it's Philly cheesesteaks. Oh yeah. You know, like that's, at is because it is still shit. Well a big fat sweaty man. I mean my shit I mean, it's Philly cheesesteaks. Oh, yeah, you know like that's like roughage yesterday. I thought a hamburger I try to cover a hamburger with vegetarian sushi Yeah, my shit was like this morning. You covered a hamburger with vegetarian sushi Yeah, I ate vegetarian sushi then for dinner to be like raw

hamburger for lunch. Raw big lunch, raw burger or fries, raw chopped half vegetarian sushi on top, raw chopped hamburger, go. One really health, breakfast doesn't count. Breakfast should usually be healthy anyway. But one healthy meal a day I think is a good way to go. That's all I do. But the problem is that when you eat one big fat meal, right? And as a fat man, when you look at a fucking

vegetarian menu and you're like, I can go shit hell on this. Yeah. I can eat well, I won't. Mm-hmm. It's got calories in it. I ate too much Chinese food last night. It did not go well.

Yeah, I could tell. What are you gonna do? Nothing. Except change. Yeah, I don't think I can. I'll change my clothes. Not my lifestyle. You gotta live every day knowing for a fact that changing is for losers. Hell yeah. Right, and love the fact that I can change my clothes. Oh, yeah lifestyle. Yeah live every day knowing for a fact that changing is for losers

Oh, yeah, right. Love the fact that I stay exactly the same learn no lessons. Tell no lies fucking pussy Yeah, dude. I don't need to learn I don't need to grow I don't need to get healthier all I need to do is laugh because laughter is the best medicine Especially if you don't have insurance because it's the only medicine you'll have but then you find out a lot of times It's like we were saying on stage the other day, which I do believe which nice out to everyone who came out the side story Oh, so much show at the Masonic so much fun. I can't wait. Hopefully we get to perform there again. Sometimes It looks like we are we might be but we can't announce it yet, but we both figure that out And then it's nice about laughing

Because laughter is the best medicine But what I also thought was really nice is that when you were talking about when you went to me took Rambo to the dog ER, I think it's so nice that they actually just have humans in there Like doing medicine instead of bringing in like the patch Adams guys. Oh, yeah, I hate don't make me laugh if I have cancer also I mean, I don't think dogs would get it Also, I mean, I don't think dogs would get it. Dogs laugh. Side stories. LPOTL.

People say they don't, but I think they do. I think that they do. Oh my God. Shout out to blue. I, the dog that died behind me. I don't know. But when I went to, when Rambo was in the emergency room, he said, I don't even want you to look up Rob can dogs laugh.

I want them to email me side stories. LPOTL. Gmail. I know the dogs laugh for a fact. I've seen, I've told jokes to Rambo and he laughs. That's I mean, I do believe that is. I've seen I've told jokes to Rambo and he laughs. That's I mean I do believe that is a confirmation bias But you're allowed to have it patreon.com

Pushed tootsie off a chair once and he looked at me and he like smiled and I was like you like that. Yeah I know you like Go to patreon.com slash last podcast in the left if you want to see your bodies Yeah Go to tik-tok at LP on the left to help China gain mastery over this country. Go to twitch.tv slash LPNTV to see all of our incredible streams. Incredible work. Good Pud is coming back. Hell yeah. As you know, we have our podcast, we've been recording it. That's going to come out very soon. Are you going to release it weekly or

you're going to put it all at once?. You'll see okay. It's a good question Very good question then we go to last podcast and left that come to see us on tour We were going to Denver this week. We are sold out. We cannot fucking wait to see you There's like eight tickets left. Yes, we can't wait. It's been so long. I can't wait. I love Denver We have it's we're gonna have a blast with my favorite coming to Seattle. We're coming to Brooklyn We're coming to go to last podcast and left.com DC in July, please Fun and Australia. I promise you we are putting together it is happening. I got the itinerary I sent it. I got a new passport. We are going plane tickets are purchased

Yeah, we is gonna happen. We cannot wait the The actual, like, I owe you a livestream. It is happening. We are working on it. It's gonna happen right before we leave. I promise you, you fucks. I promise you, we're working on it now. We're just trying to get all of your information bundled in a way that isn't too evil,

like what Morgan Freeman did in the first Batman film? But then Batman knew how important it was to not allow such an nefarious tool like Morgan Freeman had built Are you gonna make me quit off of my scruples? Am I Morgan Freeman in this conversation? I Don't know cuz that would make you Batman. Yes make you Batman. Yes. And then Marcus is Alfred. Yeah. Yeah. No, you're Robin. I'm Robin. I like being Robin. I'm Robin. But I'm no acrobat. I'll tell you that much. No, no, no. More like a fatcrobat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey! Thank you guys. Come on, fuckers. Alright, we'll see you next week. Yeah, EddieJones.com. Yeah, go buy his fucking jokes. Yeah, thank you so much for everyone who watched my movie this week. That was very sweet of you guys. Yes. All right. Love you all. How America killed my mother on Amazon. Enjoy it. Go watch it. Get sad. Now sit. Now my mom.

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