Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: Balls For Ears

Episode Date: April 1, 2021

Ben 'n' Henry break down this week's true crime news: a boogeyman hides under a bed in Ohio, a threesome ends in tragedy, a man lances his ballsack ear lobes, and MUCH MORE.Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0

There's no place to escape to. This is the last time on the left side stories. Been watching the new season of Worst Cooks. Yeah. Just to see and guess which one of them is going to kill their family. Isn't that interesting. Well, they're definitely good at sharpening knives. Also, I know this is an audio podcast, but just a visual for the audience. As Henry started talking about World's Worst Cooks, he slunched over. It somehow looks fatter and somehow like you became older when you started talking about this. Because I said how always sitting back with the long view of society. That's very nice. But I sat and I'm watching Best Week. I'm watching Worst Cook. It's still up. The ending has not been decided just

yet. Okay, hold on a second. Before we get into the myriad error in the blood of this week, because believe it or not, there's a lot of it. Is the goal to continue to get worse and decline as a chef? So they start good and then at the end you have to make like chicken nuggets and then like, you're the worst. You got to make the most nauseating slop. Is that where we are as a country? No, they are getting better. Because you remember the last winner of Worst Cooks who killed her family. She actually by the time she got to the end. Let me look this up. Worst Cooks murder. That's right. I totally forgot that there was a Worst Cook who murdered her family. When Ariel Robinson, who was such a delight on the show, she was so fun. She was a comedian.

Everybody loved her on the show. She wiped out her children and now they removed that entire season. And season is not on there at all. They got a new side host and we have one side host left because Amber Elle is over there because she is locked into Worst Cooks. She has to do that. She has to stay good for her. But they get a new host each time. And because I think the last one was just shamed about the fact that they were like hobnobbing because you have so much beef roll, so much b-roll of them joking around with this woman that then killed her children. And I just always wondered, like, now each one of these shows, which one of you is going to pop off? You're just asking questions. I think you were correct. I think they have mostly beef roll.

I think that is completely true. And let me just tell you this. Is that the Food Network that banned it or that canned that one whole season scrubbed it? I think technically Discovery Plus is the one. Discovery Plus gets some fricking balls because WWE has not scrubbed one Crispinwa match, has not scrubbed one Crispinwa interview. And if Peacock does that, I am going to be so mad. They're messing with my life now. I hate Peacock so much. I tried to watch wrestling yesterday and everything is locked. That's what happens. All right. Well, welcome to Side Stories, everyone. I am Ben hanging out with Henry. Yeah. I just want to start with a hero. I want to give it up to Lil Nas X at the very, very top of the show. First of all, wow, an applause. Very,

very good. Lil Nas X, he released an unofficial. We have to make sure we keep saying it is an unofficial Satan Nike. Well, yes, because there's a lot of lawsuits by Nike because evidently they didn't run it by them. And apparently Satan and Nike don't get along despite the fact that Nike is indeed worse than Satan. I mean, that's why we love them, right? Sure. But they have these shoes. They have a bronze pentagram attached to them and inverted cross. And apparently, I don't know whether this is a bit or not. There's supposed to be a drop of real human blood inside of the shoe. Mischief, the people that actually created the shoe, which is one of these, they do hot drops. Hot drops. Their whole thing is they do hot, takey, grab your attention,

style shoes, weirdly politically motivated, but also just art, right? They do like very intense, cool, like mini drops of limited edition shoes. And of course, you know, I was going to put this on Twitter, but I decided I'm going to wait because I'm going to tell you my thoughts right here on this show. Every single Nike shoe has a drop of child's blood in it because children make them. They work so hard. And they bleed and they bleed. And then that's what gives you the hops that allow you to dunk the ball. It's the pain and the suffering. They only use the best kids. You know it's the most talented kids with the tiniest fingers, the most diligent responses to the thread. Absolutely. They have to. They're very trained. They're technically better than our children

and we respect them and thank you so much for what they do. Look at them. I'm wearing them. No, these are, these are Adidas, but it's fine. These are not. Isn't that interesting? These are made by old women. To be fair, this shoe company, Miss Chef, they also made a Jesus shoe apparently in 2019. But I have to say, first, I have two questions for you. Miss Chef is the one, but also to clarify. So now Nike is trying to launch a legal. Oh, they launched it. They're ain't trying. They're suing as many people as they can. But the one of their, the person that they're, they're suing Miss Chef and not Lil Nas X. Lil Nas X just put his name on it and everyone's like, I'll buy it because he's famous and he's a spokesperson for

it. And indeed, what a fantastic spokesperson. Oh my God. He's perfect. Question number one. As someone, you, I know that you, uh, you like to practice, you dabble in the dark arts of Satanism. What do you think about the commercialism of your spiritual beliefs? I know a lot. Satanism loves commercialism. Okay. Satanism loves commercialism. We absolutely love it. The whole point is that you flip it all on its side. You have somebody, you make a statement in the name of Satan. And in a perfect example of why someone becomes a Satanist, Lil Nas X himself has said like, essentially, you guys are all coming at me with the same bullshit for me talking about Satan as the kind of shit that drove me out of the church in the first place.

So, I mean, of course he is hijacking the pipes and making Satan a household name again. And which is the only thing that Catholic church ever wanted. Well, the Catholic church, of course, and many, many evangelical sexes. Well, let's not be hypocritical when it comes to blood, because of course they love to slam it down their gullets whenever they get a chance. Although in many evangelical communities and churches, they don't use real wine to transition into the blood because there's a lot of former alcoholics. So they just use a little grape juice and that is 100% true. So it's an interesting story. It is funny to see, I haven't seen like the religious right get upset in a while like this. It's nice to get a little whipped up. And of course they have no

like to stand on whatsoever when it comes to hypocrisy and all of those things. So it's like, it's kind of fun to see like people pretend to be upset. Personally, I am just a little bit upset because I don't like the sneaker that much. Well, you are not an air max person. Because as I said, before the show, I'm too fat. You can not even do that. I'm just too big. But the bubbles inevitably pop and then you have that. Oh, it's very every time you walk. And it sounds like a plated tire. And it sounds like you're farting like there's a little mouse in your pocket farting. And it drives me insane. It's a sad part of the unequal version of your life. Right. You technically have an unfair life because you're bigger. Some people like you better because you're bigger. But also

your bigger life sometimes leads to you have problems like your deep vein thrombosis, deep and very, very wide feet where you had to come over the house to the night you had to release your feet from your life. One thing private. But I'm just saying because there are thin shoe. I was wearing my new Nike's. They were like those version of converse basically. Yes. I can't wear converse. And it was because I drank too much beer the night before my feet were bloated like a pregnant woman. Okay. Leave me alone. I'm onto tequila now. But Lil Nas X is a brave person who's step forward. I really do. He's making a bunch of money. It's not that brave. If it would have hurt his career, I think I would say hashtag brave, but it just helped him. We will see how

much of that money he's going to get to keep. But you know, this isn't the first time that Nike has participated in sort of more macabre things. I've got a pair of Lebron's and we're not just going to talk about shoes. We have a murder story coming right up here. But this is actually fits within the wheelhouse and we finally get to talk about shoes and say net the same time, which I am excited about. So there is a pair of Lebron's that are based off the Friday the 13th where the Nike logo drips blood. Lebron is dunking the ball, but in the vein of Jason Voorhees holding up his sword. It's really awesome. So Nike has dabbled in the horror arts before it. I say if you're Nike, be cool. They're just mad about how much publicity he got. And I think the

main like the main thing that they can't handle is the parent drop of blood in the shoe that they can't seem to handle it. But according to mischief that each drop of blood came from a member of their staff. I would hope so. Not just from some random homeless person they found outside of their San Francisco offices. I hope consent was involved when getting the blood or is it just a horrible day to be an intern? It might be a little Nas X also released that video where you full on grimes and Satan's cock. And I got to say, wow. Well, you know, between Dixie Chicks and Lil Nas isn't country music exploring different after it's incredible. He's all over that cock. But I will say I do think he does owe a little bit of a tip of the hat to South Park and their portrayal of

Satan and Saddam Hussein's extensive relationship in hell. But at the same time, Lil Nas X, what a hero for Satanism. You did it, buddy. Congrats. And I'm trying to get a hold of these shoes. It's already $2,500. There's don't get a hold of them. It's too much money on the scalpers. You're gonna get a knock off of a knock off of a knock off. And it's just gonna show up as like a Yeezy. And then you're gonna be like, this is trash. I got the app. I got the mischief after to apply for it. I got up at seven in the morning when the shoe went live to try to get it. But it was gone in maybe 45 seconds. Nicholas Cage. Nicholas Cage, I'm sure somebody bought all 666 pairs. So Lil Nas X, you know what, throw a little, throw a little fun in there as far as

news stories go in this day and age. I thought that one was actually quite pleasant. And it involved a drop of blood in a pair of shoes. But isn't that where we are as a society? Yes. And I do love his response to where Lil Nas X, all these people are yelling at him. And he's like, you guys are acting like I haven't had nine months to plan this rollout. So he's just like, he's firing on all cylinders. He's crushing. Good for him. And of course, we always support our young and up and coming entrepreneurs because that's exactly what he is. All right. Well, speaking of, well, not speaking of anything really like that, let's talk about crime. This story takes place in Michigan. And Henry, you mentioned how you woke up at seven o'clock

in the morning. I'm sure that you were like perky and it was like Cinderella waking up after she married the prince and everyone was tired after she married the prince because she was getting railed on all night. But that's why she woke up so refreshed. And then the birds put all of her clothes on for you. I'm sure that's how you wake up every single day. Every day. I am such a delight in the morning. Yes. I'm sure you don't pick out a bunch of dingleberries from your recently farted butt. I do that at night. Isn't that nice? Well, this man in Michigan woke up to a gun to his head. And what did the intruder want from him? Apparently two of his cats. Now, you just say two of his cats. I believe it was only, I think he only has two cats. Okay,

because I'm about to say he only wanted two of them. That's sad. Now, a dude woke up with a gun to his head. It's a 52 year old man who has not been identified. He's facing home invasion charges because he demanded the dude's cats. This story is kind of insane, as you can imagine, because police are trying to figure out what the hell happened. Yeah. And around 415 a.m. on March 25th, on March 24th, rather, the victim says they woke up, gun was pointed at his head. The guy was like, give me your two cats. And apparently there was a massive struggle. Yeah, of course. He grabbed a cat and left on his own. So I think there's still one cat at the house. What? But this guy just has no idea why the guy wants the cat. This sounds like Men in Black 4.

He was later apprehended with the cat, which you can imagine that's like, you know, let go of the loot before you're going to meet with the cops. Honestly, of all of the things, I think it would be really difficult to take as a cat against it. It's will, right? Wouldn't it be difficult to scoop up a big fighting cat? Absolutely. Freakin' Lutely. This is according to Sergeant Kurt Erkola. He tells People Magazine. Oh, my God. Erkola? Erkola. Oh, that's like fucking Vampire Erkola. Big boobed Vampire Erkola. He says there was a dispute over the cats. And he goes on to say, I think there was some ownership dispute, but it wasn't the suspect's cats. So this person, at that point, I say, take the cats. I don't know. What would happen if you wake up with

it under your head? It's so scary. And someone's trying to take Wendy. But isn't that almost a relief that, A, they don't want your wife? B, they don't want you? C, you can get a new dog. I feel like it would still be traumatizing. It sucks. But I'm saying out of all the things that you take. I mean, if anybody has to go, unfortunately, if anyone in the house has to go, if it's Wendy, because I've already spoken about this with Natalie. I hope you talk about this with Wendy. Oh, I mean, Wendy is already, she's very used to her lifestyle. And so she actually would not understand no matter how much I explained to her that this was happening and why it was happening. But I have spoke about it with Natalie about how it said, like, if we were ever starving,

we would have to eat Wendy. Oh, but Wendy would have died before you guys would have even become starving. No, you smash your bones because when it comes down to it, a dog can live for many, many days longer than a human can live without food. Wow, you're horrible. So you can actually, I don't, I'm not horrible, I'm a pragmatist. That's a horrible thing to do to your dog. I wouldn't want to do it. And I'd be, I'd be crying while I was doing it. But at the same time, if I was so hungry, if I was so, if I was so ravenous, and we've already eaten our leather jackets, which I actually don't even know if you can even do that anymore back in the Donner Party days, you could do, but I don't even know if there's enough meat anymore in leather currently

for you to consume it and live. Well, this is why it's very dangerous to invest too much in faux leather, because when the end days do come next thing, you know, it's faux leather, you're getting killed for that because someone just sees you wearing what they perceive, what they perceive to now be future beef jerky, which is basically all leather jacket will be, they try to cook it up. They're not going to get any sustenance whatsoever. You died for nothing. So that's not necessarily great. No, what I would say is when it comes to eating my dogs, number one, if there was a gun to my head, I don't have a family. I'd take the bullet. I'd say you leave Puffin and you leave Jerry alone and you shoot me in the head. You shoot me in the fucking

head. That's a lot because what are they going to do without you? He's still going to get the dogs. When it comes to eating Jerry and Puffin, I think I would prefer that they just slowly eat me. Well, you know what they eat. What? I mean, they just eat what you eat. No, I just got them. No, I got them begging strips and I got them the thick cut ones. Okay, dollar bills. Tell me that's not fancy food. Oh my God. Every time one of my friends brings their dumpy dogs over and they look at my dogs and they're like, oh, Ben, you just leave the food on the ground. I'm like, no, your dogs, their dogs and people need to understand that dogs are just, I see them eat vomit. Very defensive. I'm not being defensive. I'm just saying when Ed Larsen specifically brings his monster dog,

when he brings Rambo over and he tries to tell me that I am like, he's like, oh, Rambo, can you eat that? Like your dog would eat a baby. Rambo has, he has problems with his butthole and he has bad diarrhea problems that got bad gut problems. My dogs don't. No, they don't. So what's the problem? Your dogs are like steel tubes. There is no problem. Honestly, there's a lot of energy here. This is a very deep topic. Every time Eddie comes over with Rambo, he says, oh, Rambo can't have those kinds of bones. I think he's just saying Rambo can't have it. Not that they can't have it, but that Rambo specifically can't have it. And you can't take that as a judgment upon you when it's just a Rambo problem and not a puffin and Jerry problem.

I understand why moms get livid if someone even says anything about their children. Oh, of course, I get the roof. No, I get it. Don't tell me how to raise my dog. You, you don't know me. Do I act like you know me and don't tell me when I am shopping at Petco, and I'm looking at all the different and company that's pet and there's a whole company involved with it. You tell me that I don't know how I'm picking out treats for my boys. You're going to tell me that into my house? This is very, this is a lot of emotion. I want to put a gun to your head and demand your cats. What I learned from this story is the thing that all of our listeners have to remember is that at some point, your enemies have to go to sleep. I think that that's

actually more important than this because it seemed to be some sort of ownership dispute over who owns these cats for some reason. And so when it comes down to it, sometimes it really just is about, are you willing to wait in someone's house while they're asleep until they wake up and then go and take those cats? Because in the end, maybe you're more of a father than the person who was asleep ever was. Because if that person knew that you were coming to take these cats or at an inkling that someone was, somebody out there was coming to come and take these cats, I'd be sleeping with the one I opened with my rifle on my lap. I tape a bunch of knives to my cat's fingers. That's cool as hell. Let them know. Let them know that the cats are armed,

the cats are dangerous, and the cats will mess you up because they're very happy being here. I completely agree with your sentiment. I hear what you're saying. That is, of course, why the Nazi party, that's why the Nazi army were hopped up on crystal meth. So they didn't have to sleep? Never sleep. But you do die. You die early yet. Yeah, you lose the war. And you do lose the war. But inevitably, you might get one of the cats. You could. I mean, it sounds like one of the cats got away though. It sounds like you didn't even get that cat and he's arrested. And just be careful. Don't steal people's cats. Just always let the animals be. Just visit and pet. Absolutely. And of course, we'll tell a story about someone waiting and hiding a little bit later on in

this episode. One of the weirdest stories that I have ever seen. Fucking weird. This is a story about what it's like. Marriages are complex. And there is a lot of working parts in a marriage. And you really have to figure out, like, what does everybody need? What does everybody want? And the one thing that people like to do is they like to open up their relationship, and they like to maybe have things like some form of threesome. They like to do these types of things, which I think is perfectly natural. But sometimes. A menagerie. A menagerie. But sometimes it can lead to murder. I actually want to say 65% of the time. Undrue. Undrue. Most threesome are fantastic. Everyone has a great time. Come is everywhere. And then they go out

to Arby's. But the problem is that what it can do is set off. Oh, he looked at her. She looked at his penis too long. I was supposed to be the one holding her hands. But here's the story. This is Ada Pastor, shot to death by a wife, accomplice in a alleged murder plot, investigators say. This comes from Oklahoma. And it is a very Oklahoma crowd. This comes from 80 Oklahoma. This is from News 9, written by Brittany Tulis. New shocking details change the story surrounding the death of this Ada Pastor, Dave Evans. So Dave Evans, he was a pastor, shot to death. He was shot to death as a murder plot involving his wife. The Oklahoma State Bureau of Investigation said, Evan's wife went to the Ada Police Department Thursday morning, investigators,

and said she told everybody what happened, which I think is really interesting. Let's go back to our other favorite source, the Daily Mail, which gets a little bit juicier. Pastor's wife, 47, and her lover, 26, are arrested for murdering her husband. So after they had multiple hotel threesomes together. So they were having a lot of hot sex together in a motel. And again, this is why- And I'm going to say, I'm looking at this, you say hot sex, I'm looking more like lukewarm sex. No, physically, the room was very hot. These are anti-air conditioning people. Well, an Oklahoma pastor's wife. Now, Christy Evans and her lover, Khalil Dreamy Square, have been arrested for the murder of her 50-year-old husband, David Evans. According to police,

they had at least one threesome with Square at a super eight motel. Whoa. Oh, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo. Well, apparently the problem here is, though, and this is the thing with threesomes. So once you have a threesome, you've got to make sure all three are together. You have to have a debrief. Well, you can do a debrief. That's great. Do that. Do a little debriefing. Sure. As if it's a CIA operation, but horribly right. But if you want to continue to have sex with one of the people in the threesome, you have to alert the other person in set threesome. Otherwise, you end up in the band Fleetwood Mac, making great album,

one great album. One really good album. So that was the problem here was she, the wife, continued to bang Khalil, but the husband was not privy to this information. And I think that that that may have added a little bit of a riff to the relationship. So that was, you know, again, one of one of the many problems that happened here. Well, according to this, because first of all, it was not like old Dave Evans was a looker himself. He's looking a little bit like a roadie from Rush. He's got that big steel cross on him. This is a bogey tea. But apparently after engaging the group sex, Christine Khalil, yes, they kept sleeping together, but she started complaining to Khalil that her husband called her A. This is what I'm trying

to figure out. It's what this word that is leaked out. It is four. It is five letters, though. It's he called her a fat W.H.A. Oh, whore. Is it? Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's what it was. And then this is the Daily Mail. And they're like, we can't say the word whore. By the way, on the next page, this is called the Gaper of the Week. It's like, thank you, Daily Mail, for being so sensitive. So she complained to Khalil, call her one of these fat ones. They wanted her and she wanted him dead because he was so verbally abusive. So on March 22nd, Khalil entered the family's home while they were sleeping and shot the pastor dead in his bed. Using the whole time, she's like, oh, when is he gonna come? It's like Santa. It's like Christmas

night, isn't it? Because this woman does look like me shaved and in a wig. He then fled the scene and Christie called 911 claiming an intruder, some kind of Asian. Oh my goodness. Yeah, claiming an intruder had broken in and killed him. Four days later, she confessed to police because she said she felt bad. So she actually probably could have gotten away with this because I can't imagine the cops. I mean, Khalil would have went to prison hardcore for it. If they found him, I'm not sure if at that point they had even found him. I think what we have here is the single worst woman to ever have a threesome. Obviously could not handle the sexual attraction that she had to Khalil. Her husband and her when they married, they were actually kind of cute.

They were sort of like a long haired hippie couple. It is so obvious that she was in way over her head. She got she got deep dicked in a way she had never been before. She finally felt the back of her vagina and could not even handle it to the point where she had a murder plot set up, but then also couldn't handle it because then she confessed to the cops. And if you're Khalil, you're like, I did all of this for you. And now you're just going to confess to me killing this guy. This is a nightmare times 10. Well, I just don't know why you can't get divorced or keep fucking him. Tell your husband, Hey, I'm fucking this guy, you should go fuck somebody else too. Like you should go do something. Well, let's open it all the way up. And obviously I feel like

David Evans is going to be like, yeah, well, where am I supposed to go down by the Hertz? Because honestly, Khalil only got involved because of this, whatever the, the pure platinum white heat between him and Christie Evans, which is like, to be honest, she looks like Elron Hubbard. If Elron Hubbard was a woman. Yeah. And of course, you know, I mean, he's a, you know, he's a younger gentleman. So that helps. I suppose it's a town on her. But maybe he thought that like, there'd be some money there. But I don't know if there's a lot of money in a pastor's wife life. Like, I don't know if there's give there's, is there cash I don't think not just passion is all of this just passion unbridled. I think this is a middle class pastor. This isn't

a mega church pastor. No, these were too much money involved. But the problem is once again, if you have a threesome, this guy probably likes to be cocked. You just got to invite him back into the room, because that's the only appropriate hashtag Christian thing to do. That is what they agreed upon. And she broke the triangle of trust. And then she then murdered her husband. And now they're both going away for a long time. And for what? For what? For a couple of for a couple of Deep Dickens. Because when it comes down to it, like, I know everybody wants that Deep Dickens. I get it. I know you're searching for it. Everybody would like it. But when it comes down to it in jail, that Deep Dickens memory is going to go away so fast. You're not going to

remember that Deep Dickens, because it's going to be gone. You have to build have a kind of like your soul get deep dicked by someone's personality. Well, I think that's really important. And that's the foundation of a solid relationship. Even more sad. Christie, of course, the woman who killed David or set up the murder of David, they have three children together. Yes, it's very sad. It's a very sad story. Get a fucking machine. There's a series of other things other than murdering your husband. Yes, there's so many other things. You get one of those big old kickstand dildo machines. I've seen Lady Lockup. She's going to find Wendy with the long hands. And she's going to be just long thin hands. She's got all those

those manicotti fingers. She's going to find manicotti Wendy fingers who's just going to, you know, she's going to get she's going to have a fine time there. Oh, that's great. This is according to the the church. Apparently the church, they had to release a statement and it's ironically called the Harmony Free Will Baptist Church, which is the most open minded three words I've ever seen before the word Baptist Church, Harmony Free Will. It's almost like someone does. Perhaps. So they say Harmony, Harmony Free Will Baptist Church has been grieving the death of our pastor, David Evans, over the last few days. The circumstances are now just coming to light and they have taken us by surprise and we're greatly saddened. We serve a perfect savior,

Jesus Christ, who gave his life for us. These revelations do not diminish that truth and we will continue to serve him. That's the one thing about being a pastor here today, gone tomorrow, new pastor in town because at the end of the day, you're just a little middle manager and God is the CEO. Oh yeah. And guess what? David Evans is honestly, you know, he'll go up to heaven. Will he? In his own fate. No, he's not going anywhere. I don't know. He's just in a coffin. He's in the three way and he's having a three way in the sky, which isn't that nice. All right. Well, I've got to tell this story. This is one of the most, like this story just drives me nuts. Do you want to tell this Ohio story about this dude who lived under the bed? I mean,

this is scary and also, but also weird. Oh, it's so weird. Okay. So there's this dude, his name is Sharrett Wright. He met this victim, a very young girl. I believe she is, they said between 13 and 18. Between 13 and 18, let's say she's, let's go with 15. So he met her on Instagram, unbeknownst to her mother. He had, first of all, also Jared Wright, he had been charged with three counts of rape and one count of producing child pornography. This man is absolutely horrible. Yes. So he meets this girl on Instagram. Turns out he was hiding under her bed. She did know he was there, but again, the term consent is not even in the picture. No, it's not even in the picture. This is a young, young baby girl. So he was hiding under her bed. He would sneak out at night.

He would hold her down and force her to have sex with him. And the girl's mom did not know until finally the girl's mom discovered him. And it was unclear as to how she discovered him. It's unclear exactly how long he was staying in the house. They suspect it could be three weeks. I don't know how long a man can live under the bed who is not the boogeyman. So she was, I mean, obviously being manipulated and trained. Maybe she was bringing him food or water. He's sleeping. When it comes down to it, I want to say this to anyone. Oh my God. Anybody never fall for a man who's got to live under your bed. He should have his own bed. I agree with you on that, Henry. Not always do I agree with you, but on that you are 100%

correct. Anybody who's got to live under your bed, it's not husband material. Can you imagine being the mom when you see this, when you know this man has been under your bed for three weeks? That's the thing when someone like that fantastic film from, what was it, two years ago? Parasite? Parasite. Yeah, that was great. The idea of someone being in your house and you don't know it, you don't know it. So you're like, okay, but then once you find out, oh, someone's been in your house for three weeks. Oh, I move. It's so scary. I'd move, but never come back. You never find me again. I would be gone. I would be gone so fast. Have you found out like a man could just casually live under the bed? How many times have been going

in there saying, and I'm every woman vacuuming and all this kind of shit? Meanwhile, he's still under there just jerking off thinking about how he's going to have sex with my daughter at night? And my daughter's a dog. This is absolutely disgusting. The guy looks like kind of like a Richard Ramirez. He is like one of these wispy, mustached, loser fuck faces that I have just seen. He's just the type of person who points at words on TikTok. Jared, right, 20 years old. I mean, I cannot imagine how much more devastating, what more devastating things this man would do in his life if he is ever out. Like this dude is a scary serial predator who, this is why, like the Ramirez story, the one thing that does scare me the most is the idea that you're going about your business

and there's someone in the closet. Oh yeah, of course. And BTK too. It's very, very scary. And that's why I don't even like look under my bed because I'm like, I'm not scared. I'm not going to look under my bed, but you got to look under the bed sometimes, I guess. I check every corner of my house. God damn. I check every corner of my house before we go to sleep and it's just the truth. I do one scan. I do one big old scan. I look through everything just so far. And yeah, maybe I'm paranoid. No, I don't know. Maybe I'm fucking paranoid. I don't know if you are or not. We've been doing a true crime show for over a decade. It comes to a point where are you being paranoid? Are you just being cautious and irrational? I don't even know. But this kid,

in a way, and I call him a kid too, and this is not excusing anything. No. It sounds like this guy is also one of these. There must be some storyline he has in his head that this was some form of romance, that this was like a thing that he could do. I don't know what the hell was going on with this fucking moron. But you know what? Now he's going to go to jail for quite a bit of time, I imagine he will see some time for doing this for, you know, breaking and entering, essentially probably holding a hostage, doing all sorts of shit. So he is going to go to jail, and then he's going to not do well in jail either. Well, and of course, he again, as I said, he was charged with three counts of rape and one count of producing child pornography. And this whole

thing takes place in Cincinnati. So you can almost just hear the monster under the bed, slurping Cincinnati chili, just though so much of it. There's something about it. I wish it happened in a city that it didn't have its own chili. I know skyline chili. It's again, just because it just gives a bad name to chili. And then when I think of him and I'm thinking of chili, and I don't want to be thinking of chili while I'm looking at you, you know, I mean, I want to be thinking of chili when I'm thinking of the American flag. I want to think about chili when I'm when I'm thinking about my family and friends and beers. When it comes to someone being in your house and watching you. Okay, obviously, we know scary, horrible. Sure. But they deserve whatever

they say. That's for certain. But aren't you I feel like if I found that out, I would just immediately be so embarrassed. Oh, sure. All the weird shit that you do alone, all the stuff that you just deep the in your own personal time, all the times that I've, you know, you know, smelling your own perineum to make sure that you don't need to shower that day. You're all it's all about a that's a that's a health check. That's a health check. And just to know, but you know what, now that you said that sentence, I'm actually going to flip it. Good. Yeah. Smell my shit. Watch me bend over. Oh, yeah, dude. If I can stretch to my toes today, because I'm trying to drop a few LBs. You want to watch me do that. You want to see them, but the boy perform. But I

also have a feeling that people aren't hiding under our beds for a very specific reason. No, no, no, they're not there. We turn them off for some reason. And you know, but honestly, if they did work, they weren't those people that wanted to eat human shit, we'd be a great place for you to come. Oh my goodness. Because you come to our house, the fucking you can get some guaranteed hot loaves fucking second I wake up. Honestly, it's easy. So in the end, you should choose some big galoot versus some tiny woman. I don't not even a woman, a girl, a little juice, a little girl, go find a big fat man. I don't just don't find anyone. So we don't want to scare everyone who has children out there, but you should be here to look under the bed. We should be tonight.

You absolutely should be here for the foreseeable future. And you know what I would do? I would just, you know, oh my God, I love the first Friday the 13th. Yes. Some of the best kills. I don't actually love the twist at the end, to be honest, but it's cool because I'm fine. I just we were all Jason people. Yes. But when you just stab through the couch, stab through the couch, stab through the bed. And then if you hit something, if it comes up with a little blood on it, shouldn't have been there. Shouldn't have been there. That's my house. This is my bed to stab. Of course, your family will say mommy's stabbing the bed and why is she destroying where I sleep? Mommy is in charge of the house. Mommy chooses what's get stabbed in

this house. And mommy is protecting you and hopefully your pet turtle or gerbil is not underneath the bed because then mommy's going to stab the little pet there. But anyway, that happened in Ohio, that happened in Cincinnati. Be freaking careful. This man is going away and thank God for it. No one is safe, not even in bed. Not even in bed. Now this story might trigger you kissle. I'm always triggered. This comes from this is an old timey story. This is an old timey account of a big foot sighting. Oh, I think it's really, really fun. It's from the 1880s. This is a story that took place in the 1880s. And this was recounted in the 50s. This is this fun story. Okay, my name is Rita Swift. I live in Orange County, California. In 1945,

my grandfather George Hoon told me a story about the time his train hit a large ape creature and bent the cow catcher on a train. Oh, this was in the 1880s. And he was an engineer on a train that ran along the borders of the US and Canada. It was night. And all of a sudden that train hit something and they stopped the train because the cow catcher was dragging on the tracks. At first they thought it was a moose. But when they all got out with their lanterns, they discovered this huge smelly ape hung up in the catcher. Why do they always have to put the odor of the ape? You think a moose would smell good or a cow smells good? Smelly, funky, funky ape. They only had lanterns for light and they were in the forest basically in the middle of nowhere.

It took most of the crew to pick it up and lift it into an open flat car. They noticed it was structured differently from a gorilla of ape and smelled so bad the crew got the smell on them. Oh my god, like they in 1850 this construction crew smelled great themselves. You know what I am getting triggered. Immediately triggered. They left it on the flat car because it took at least two hours to straighten out the cow catcher. Good thing my great-grandfather was also a blacksmith. These were back when men had skills. Yes, I know they could do multiple things. They were at least two hours from the next water tower and station of sorts. So the breakman noticed Indians sneaking around the forest. This is back in the day. Of course. When they were ready to go, the crew

checked on their smelly passenger that he was gone. They looked for tracks and decided the Indians had dragged away to the forest across the stream because of course they wanted them, you know, they wanted stinky corpse. I guess so. They washed up in the stream and were glad to get rid of it. The smell had even remained in the flat car. My great-grandfather took pieces of the hair back and gave it to a doctor he knew in Michigan. They had all decided the creature had escaped from a circus or some kind of sideshow. Great-grandfather thought it was eight feet tall and weighed at least 500 pounds. Whoa! Because it took six men to carry it off the jacks. When my daughter was a student at California State University in Fullerton in 1986, I met a professor of anthropology.

The reason I was there was I donated Indonesian fighting swords to her department and I don't know how you got them. Humble brag. They were very old and belonged to my husband. I just didn't feel comfortable having them in my home anymore. Oh, so this is a lot of information. This is a woman that you're interpreting. I noticed in her office she had information on the walls about a big foot. I told her the story and she believed it was documented. My grandfather said the ape had a different face than what he remembered of a gorilla. He said the teeth were like a human but extremely wide and large. The body hair was thick dark brown with light tipping and the eyes were large and dark. He said it agreed it was male because of its genitalia.

Grandfather continued as a railroad engineer at the California Wyoming line until he retired in 1925. He fought off outlaws with a six shooter from the calf. I have a photo of grandfather with the crew stopped in Eads, Colorado with a large cannon hole on the side of the engine. This was in 1998 when some outlaws on horses pulled up an old Confederate cannon along the tracks fired it at the engine. The crew chased him away but left the train damaged. They were on their way to Durango carrying bank money from Denver. Grandfather would never tell these stories that were not true. He would never tell stories that were not true. He was a devout Methodist and he said his prayers so loud every night the whole house could hear him. I don't know what that means

he's an honest man. I don't know. He had originally come from the Amish, Mercer County, Pennsylvania but left a fight for the union in the Civil War. It's the Amish. His father did not accept his decision and he never returned to Mercer, Colorado. Never once. He was born in 1845 and he died in 1947. Well number one a hell of a life good work. I fantasize obviously about that wild wild west existence. As a matter of fact I get my clothes at the western general store. But you don't realize like it's real dangerous. Yeah man. They wheeled up a cannon to a train to shoot the train because it had a bunch of money in it though. Oh yeah that's what's cool they're running money across on the tracks. You've been Sasquatch trying to get that fucking cash money. That's exactly right because

Sasquatch might want to bring that money to the past the present or the future because of course he can transfer through time. But now you try to do that with a brinkstruck you're just going to get murdered. You can get murdered but wasn't there a brinkstruck robbery and inception you just have to use the top and then use your dream technology. Inception or the one where they wear the funny old man mask. Oh the town. The town. I love those. Love the town. Bostonians. Alright well Henry mentioned Genitalia. So we must tell this. This is a feel good story. Now I can't personally watch this show because I hate this show. I am not a pimple popper person. No it disgusts me. I still don't particularly understand how this person has a television show. If you

don't understand the pimple popper thing people love it though. They love it and I again yeah that's just not for us. It makes me crazy but there was a dude and you know how we like our earlobes not to look like testicles. No I like my earlobes being real loby. Real just a loby. Well this poor dude he had a growth in his earlobe that looked just like a sack of balls. It is absolutely fantastic. He has a sack of balls growed off his ear and he said the biggest problem was that when he would walk down the street the balls on his ear would slap him in the face. It's so sad. He had this growth for 21 years. The dude is 38 which means he had this at 17. High school is hard enough when you don't have balls dangling from your ear. He's had it since he was 17 years old. He said

it's a constant sort of it's a constant source of irritation and it interferes with his job as a forklift operator. Also to make things even. Oh he's gotta fucking regularly wash it because it can give off a bad smell. So he's got a sack of nuts on his ear that can give off an odorous smell. I'm surprised they can't even smell. I'm really surprised they didn't blur this out. It is such a sack of balls. It's such a sack of balls so but thank god Dr. Sandra Lee not to be confused with the woman who was a chef formerly married to that scumbag up there in New York. She said I can do this for you. So she went she gave him the opera or she put him on the operating table. She figured it all out and my god look at oh my god look at the before. Yeah and

then they literally is it's a sack of nuts. She talked about how she had to get a whole new set of scrubs because as soon as she popped it with her scalpel it's shot juice all over. Yeah I hate this. I don't like the show. He says that it's the size and weight of a pear. Yeah it's the size of a pear. He says it's heavy. You can see how it just pulls on my ear. It's the size of a pear and it's shaped like a pear. Obviously he doesn't want to say a pair of balls because it's on his face and he says it goes from skinny then fat at the end and then he says sometimes I'm moving my face really fast and the bubble just starts slapping. Oh that's what he said and honestly this is really true because this is where it gets sad. He's like depression is real. It started when I was

13 being bullied at that age. I'll take everything out of you. It'll take everything out of you. As big as I was then I was still soft. I don't like confrontation. It's kind of like you here saying how everybody yells at the big guy. He's like I'm just tired of people talking about oh man look at that ball on his ear. I'm a lovely person and that's how I want people to see me. And of course he got this surgery because he has a wedding coming up so he found love. That's incredible. It's incredible and the fact that this woman could look past the balls is just great. I mean honestly you just sling them behind your neck. I've never really understood people that have a problem with something like this where you can avoid it. It's just there. You have so much

other person and like you know you just kind of hide it. You put in a little pouch or something. Yeah well according to the doctor she says it's called a cheloid. She says it's usually triggered by trauma. It's usually hard and firm. She says it just kind of feels like kind of tissue and anyway so just every day wake up and say I am so happy I don't have balls on my ear but then also how happy I am that this man was able to find someone to help him and this was much more than just popping a big zit. This was a straight up surgery surgery. They had to cut it open. They had to take all the gunk out of it. They had to cut off and they had to sew up the bottom of his ear. It's really intense. I don't watch this show. This show I can you imagine

because I like to do something called Grace which is watching Food Network and eating. Oh yeah of course. I don't know you're talking about a daily lifestyle. Yes which I know every single dietitian says don't eat and well don't eat your TV but don't eat while watching TV because it just I guess it doesn't do something like your body doesn't realize that you're eating and then you eat way too much. What? It shuts off like you're supposed to lie. No you're supposed to focus. I'm sick of all these doctors lying. You're supposed to like focus on what you eat and then like not because when you graze and you're watching Food Network shows you're naturally going to get hungry. Well you got to eat something while watching the Food Network shows because

if not I get so violently hungry we fight. But you can imagine someone who eats while watching this show and especially it makes you think of an egg when you get like if you have a nice egg. I like a nice runny egg. Sunny side runny egg. Somebody if you can eat while watching Dr. Pimple Popper side stories LPOTL at gmail.com let us know how you can do it. We have a lot of listeners that are like that though. Well and I know in my famous so I am traumatized from pimples because my middle brother Chris he would pin me down and he would pop the zits on my back. I guess he'd like to do it. Some people do. I don't understand. I had a girlfriend in high school that liked to pop my blackheads. Then I was like I don't like it. But it's nice that they'll do that. I guess so

but it still kind of hurt. Well but it feels good to have the only thing that I can say about like I get the idea of having the rest of the relief. I get that. I get that because it just looks so gross but I understand. I almost get you know when you see somebody with something that's about like a big old zit that's about to get popped. I do wish I could get the sensation of it being popped but not see it. I don't want to see it. I don't want to see it but I like the idea of just being like oh wow I excavated this toxin but I don't know how it's a TV show. We have pitched all over the place and we'll never get we'll never be as famous as the pimple. You want to hear a really disgusting story. When I used to be really really very very broken and didn't have a health insurance

I used to have a problem with getting ingrown toenails because I used to wear shoes which that's a problem is that when I wasn't wearing shoes that were wide enough for my feet. Yeah and so I used to get really bad ingrown toenails so what I used to do is stick my foot into a bunch of ice until I got my toe good numb and then I would I would light a needle either a needle I would first use a needle to kind of pop it all out but then I would use nail clippers that I'd also put under a lighter and I would use those to just cut chunk and chunk and chunk out of it as my toe would like I try to do as fast as possible for my toe stop being numb. I used to do that constantly between wrestling and football in high school your toes get all janked up and you have

to do it. I'm actually this is not even that disgusting. Yeah it's home surgery. Yeah what a great episode. What a great episode. Anyway just be careful and again be thankful that you don't have balls on your ears. Yeah be thankful well and next week we don't we're running out of time but next week I'm going to cover this this new alien story because I want to devote some more time to it. Okay fantastic well are we on to Hero of the Week? I believe we are. All right let's do Hero of the Week. This story it's just a special story and I absolutely love this man his name is Stuart McDaniel. He is a landlord he has a lot of properties in Tulsa as a matter of fact I think he has 230 properties 86 which are commercial. This past year has been an absolute nightmare

economically devastating and this landlord did what I wish every landlord would do. He refused to evict 145 tenants during the pandemic because they couldn't pay for the rent and this is like thank god for people like this having some sense of decency to human beings. So McDaniel he acknowledged everyone was hit by the pandemic and he's like you know what I just can't do this. His work has been described by members of this community as not gentrification but ensuring that the soul of the neighborhood is still kept alive so he really cares for Tulsa he's in Tulsa and he realizes if you got 146 people evicted what the hell is that gonna like what does it do? It's gonna destroy your community and he knew that so he says you have to create a

home that the family who becomes your tenant loves living in. With affordable rental fees this work is not just about collecting the rent and apparently the people that live in his homes they really like them apparently they're well done well kept up. This is according to Naisha Hall who actually has a successful daycare this is what she has to say about Stuart. She says Stuart made my dreams a reality. We call him the daycare dad. We opened in October of 2020 and we are now at full capacity so we have to 45 children and they also whole name the daycare Tony's Angels Learning Academy. Man that's what a nice bit of news. It is a nice bit of news. So fucking hard out there for so many people and the idea of just generating more homeless people

like kicking people out of their way because you still don't understand is that when you kick them out of their apartment it starts to it starts that descent of like where will they ever get the chance to normalize like where will they ever get a chance to go and like take care of themselves enough in order to get a job like we this the whole point we've lost all touch with the idea of like don't you want the same tenants like in your house like don't you want to keep them don't you want to build like a like a community isn't that like I mean I guess they they don't but I don't understand well a lot of these massive corporate landlords don't and this guy he is much better than them he says when it comes to other landlords considering eviction he says be mindful that everyone has

to give a little during this crazy time take a second look at the tenants that are behind you and ask yourself if your actions now contribute to their sustainable success in the near future or not so Stuart McDaniel thank you so much for what you've done in the great area of Tulsa Oklahoma many Oklahoma stories today some good some not so good but this one I'm going to say is great Stuart McDaniel congratulations buddy and just please take care of each other out there especially during these trying times okay here we go we got some really good we got some good feedback about talking about how easy it was to rip a human ear off yeah I know people were surprised but then again some weren't surprised no they weren't here's some listener emails here we go

regarding ripping off a human ear that's a memorable story via my navy seal friend Frank he's not 70-ish they should have gotten somebody to rip the guys with the balls here what can one it's eight pounds of pressure we don't need to he doesn't need to go to dr pimple popper I could have ripped his fucking nuts off his head this is why okay um he destroyed a guy oh by grabbing his ear as the ear doesn't pop off necessarily it's more like the ear is the pull tab to rip a guy's face off which is pretty intense it was pretty intense he said in another one he said he said this guy I mean you know for no you can never tell if anything's real or not from 70 who's seven years old who say that used to be a navy seal but honestly this is fun he said he was sent

on a secret mission to assassinate someone and return with the body he hiked through the Balkans killed his target tethered her weights to his height back through the Balkans he slipped dropped her body and then ended the story with that's how I broke my spine oh my god wow 70 year olds well some of them have really crazy stories others are just upset that they have to go to parlor now this is uh I also this is really fun I took a self-defense class and the only thing I remember from that is how easy it is to rip off an ear apparently the main thing you want to do is you want to grab the top of the ear with as many fingers as you can and then rip straight downwards in a straight forceful and quick motion the instructor told us that doing this would quote

rip an ear off like you were tearing paper that's like is he going to jigsaw's academy of martial arts it helps I guess okay yeah that makes sense you start from the top and pull down I suppose when it comes to ripping an ear off that's the only proper protocol okay and here's this last story this is interesting okay after last week's episode of side stories we guys talked about various issues you and other lpn family members have had with airport security I didn't write in with my experience flying in Poland um where it's actually uh you you actually operate the plane using little bicycle wheels you can do a whole series of funny jokes so many so funny um actually the planes in poland float in 2018 I was studying abroad in living in london myself and two of my

friends decided to take a weekend trip to poland in germany we first flew to poland from Heathrow in london to play a visit to Auschwitz just like him and marcus yeah we were in poland for a little less than 24 hours before flying out to germany we're either going to spend the rest of our weekend can I just say this though when it comes to like we went to pay a visit to Auschwitz I just don't I just that's why i'm always confused on like what do you call it like we took a journey to vacation and vacation vacation like there's a lot of summer at Auschwitz yeah I don't know just hard hard to approach the whole subject it is very intense yeah it's intense when it's been a vacation yeah upon going through security at warsaw airport in in Wulich which on the surface is much less

intense than tsa checkpoints in america to catch our flight to berlin myself and one of my friends traveling with me we had our bags set off some kind of alarm that would be triggering we didn't know what would be triggering these alarms the security agent at the time at the end of the bag scanning machine began yelling in polish what we could only assume was a question to the room of who these bags belong to my friend and I said the bags belong to us and we were immediately rushed off into a detention area and searched in a room some other security or the airport oh scary that's not good no security agents in the room with us spoke very little english and of course being the touristy americans we were did not speak we did not speak an ounce

of polish the agents began unpacking our bags piece by piece and asked us to remove our top layers of clothing our sweatshirts and jackets and began expecting those as well the only english word we could understand from the agent's conversation with each other was the word radiation over and over again at this point we were both getting a little freaked out we were we were worried we would miss our flight out to germany and had little to no way of understanding what the agents were saying and what was wrong with our backs eventually a supervisor arrived to the detention room that spoke english fluently she asked us what we were doing in poland how long we had been there and where we had been during our stay we told her we were american student we

were american students studying abroad that would we'd flown to poland the day before to visit auschwitz and that we were now traveling in germany she then asked us if we had our bags with us during our tour of the concentration camp and we told her that we had she then told the security agents everything was fine and that they could repack our bags and let us go long story short apparently auschwitz is riddled with leftover radiation from all it's all over the buildings there not clear on exactly what was the case but why but i'm sure it has to do with at least a handful of the fucked up shit that went on there during world war two so apparently if you ever set belongings down on the ground or you rub against a wall or simply spend a long enough time

in certain rooms while you're on the camps property you're very likely to pick up trace amounts of radiation there was enough found in our bags to set off the sensors in the bag scanning machine no the fact that we had to spend the rest of the weekend knowing we were dragging radiation around with us was a little bit disconcerting but besides that incident at the airport the rest of our weekend was lovely and we did a deep disinfection clean on everything that we took with us when we returned to our apartments in london wow that's indeed auschwitz uh wow what a uh what a nightmare what a nightmare all around i did not even realize that apparently the hot dogs they're awful i hope so i actually hope all of the food that they serve at auschwitz is bad frank

for the tourists yep but we also talk about the americanization of the word frank furter in america now i was actually reading about that the idea of like the shift from hat doug to frank theater was uh almost an intentional movement okay because it went on the apparently the germans were doing a lot of weird shit during world war one yeah a weird stuff and then later on they did a bunch of weird other stuff well who knows all i know is i guess they shouldn't have killed france ferdinand apparently i guess so i actually just saw a picture of his assassin assassins always they were children well it's just they were little kids i said well yeah little kids but they were literally like teenagers it's funny the eyes of someone who had just

assassinated somebody because there's so much there because i think a lot of them really do believe they were gonna get a hero's welcome and then there is always sort of turns out that it's not that way i think there's the hero's welcome complex i think there's also the straight up you impulsively do something not fully considering the implications of your actions and it's not until you're receiving your mug shot that it's all start you starting to get it what you've done yeah absolutely all right everyone well thank you so much for listening to this episode of side stories and thanks for supporting all the shows here get out there you got to live your life knowing that you have a little nausex rip off nikey arriving at your home and you're about to wear it and you're

loving it you're loving it because everybody's gonna be like ooh is that the satanist with the most and you're like i am the satanist with the least because he gives away that which he has to keep his territory strong that's actually true the satan satanist can't you know we constantly guard our things yeah honestly if i did have a pair of satan shoes you'd have to fucking pull them off my dead corpse you could argue that if everyone was a satanist the entire culture would be in total ruins kind of well that's why i think that there should be some pushback and we should start to expand our territory as satanists to our areas where we live and understand we should be looking to help our communities that's a good point to make it good

for satanists to live there well as i've always said you are in charge of your own life you are your own god but that requires you to take care of people and also it is in your best interest to take care of others because what goes around does indeed come around and i think that that's the most compelling the most compelling reason for you to do good things is because it does selfishly benefit you and if you could just fully understand that every single time you help somebody else you're helping the your entire community be we're only as good as our weakest link absolutely you got to build up these strong links and what a fantastic show that was all right everyone well thank you so much for listening hope you're hanging in there keep on uh listen to

ablingham's topic this week we're going to be talking a little bit more serious subject matter not that what we don't talk about this show on on the show is serious what are you fucking talking about this is incredibly serious yeah i know the whole thing but we'll be talking about what's going on there in minneapolis because it is a raceway yeah oh that's indianapolis yes the indianapolis raceway yes we'll be focusing mostly on that and a lot of cars they go around i actually can we please go to a nascar you know i want to oh you know i just want to i want like oh yeah i'll root for the men going in a circle sure i don't even know who to wait i'm just gonna root for my favorite brand if there's like a if there's like a uh mickey captain crunch oh i don't know if captain

crunch is getting in the nascar game whatever it is i'm gonna find my favorite product and just root for that product because they're all dressed like they honestly they're dressed like politicians should dress full of logos oh also make sure you check out we have classy night in that is coming out it is on last podcast uh network on twitch 6 30 p.m this wednesday it's coming out you're probably i don't know if this is all coming out at the same time but then make sure you check out all our shows on twitch slash podcast network we are on um thursday nights saturday 2 30 uh pst um check out someplace underneath and our new show lpn deep dive is doing both of them if you could go to their individual channels and follow them on spotify or wherever you listen to your

podcasts for someplace underneath they would be so great they would be absolutely grateful and of course uh thursday's 5 p.m pst time i'll kick your ass he'll take your i'll try anyway sometimes i lose but i'm ten and three all right everyone hail yourselves hail satan my constellation and check under the bed check under the bed check under the bed right now wherever you are check under the bed check under your cars pull over your car and check under your cars quit driving this show is made possible by listeners like you thanks to our ad sponsors you can support our shows by supporting them for more shows like the one you just listened to go to last podcast network dot com