Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: CrimeWave at Sea w/ Sinisterhood

Episode Date: November 5, 2025

Ahoy maties! This week, the boys bring you a very special Side Stories dispatch LIVE from the high seas - with the help of the lovely ladies of Sinsterhood -  to break down the dark side of cruise life, the death of Dick Cheney, the phenomenon of women going missing on cruise ships, The Bermuda Triangle, the unlucky old lady forgotten at Lizard Island, and much, much more... For Live Shows, Merch, and More Visit: www.LastPodcastOnTheLeft.comKevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Last Podcast on the Left ad-free, plus get Friday episodes a whole week early. Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus.  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

There's no place to escape to this is the last podcast on the left side stories that's when the cannibalism started side stories yes oh yeah oh oh oh oh oh oh sinister hood oh thank you Side stories. Yeah, great choice. You. We'll do two housekeeping things up top is that these don't amplify.

So what we're going to do is talk loud and so you can hear us just so you know. And then we're going to do a bit of a soundtrack right up top. Right? Yeah. You guys sound great. Thank you.

Always. Nice. We always sound great. Yeah. Did you yell come? Yeah. Do you not sound check with come. yourself? We have to test it. Nut, nut, nut.

Nope, we're good. Yeah, normally, normally I name groups that were warned about 9-11. Oh, okay. Dick Chene. Well, they didn't travel well. Yeah. The, uh, T. We'll get to it. We'll get it. Yeah, so I guess, how are we looking?

How are we sound, buddy? Good? We got all over time. Can you guys hear us okay? All right. So, yeah, we're going to take it back from here. Let's do it. We're all theater, kids, so you just project. For jazz, you should die for him.

You all did theater too, right? Oh, yeah. Good, good, good, good, good. Are we doing a play? Do you all want to do a play? Ooh. What kind of play? The Dick Cheney on his deathbed?

Yeah. I'm just, I'm so fucking... I hate my daughter. I hate my daughter. I hate my daughter. I'm so fucking mad that three monkeys had to die. Yeah. That was my birthday gift.

Chrissy was telling me the other day, hey, your birthday gift's on the way, and then the alert came up that said, monkeys have gotten loose from a truck that turned over. In Mississippi, on the way to a testing facility, and then one was found in a spirit Halloween in Houston. It's the season.

Lady just got the last one. Shot it in the head. That's right. That's right. They got loose. She was scared for her children because it was in her yard. I said, just keep the kids inside.

Yeah. All right, when we start, let's introduce ourselves on the top of the bus. Let's do it. Hello, hello. My name is Heather McKinney. I'm the co-host of Sinisterhood with my best friend. I'm the best friend, Christy Wallace, and I co-host Sinisterhood with my best friend. Oh.

Hi, my name is Henry Zabrowski, and I'm sitting here with my worst enemy from side stories. Yes. And I'm Ed Larson, and I'm sitting here with my breast friend. Oh, D. Cupsabrowski. I got my mother's tints in my father's ass. In a jar. In a box. In a box.

Yeah. I have my dad in a box, too, in the closet. It's my dad in a box. My mom still lives in a house alive. Oh, okay. Heather, dead dad? Dead dad. Dead dad underground in a box.

We all have dead dad. A house is kind of like a casket for the living. Every time, every time someone goes, oh, I'm so sorry. I'm always like, you're not the one who pulled his plug. I am. No need to be sorry. Don't be sorry. And I laugh every time I think about it.

Yeah, truly. Speaking of Dead Dad's, I can't believe Dick Cheney died today. Yeah. That's crazy, man. Oh, right. Always thought when we get one. I read on CNN and said he was plagued with heart disease, and I was like, we were plagued with him for, like, a long time.

For like a long time. How many hearts did he end up having? Three. Three? Yeah. That's really cool. Each one more filled with hate than the last. My question is, where did they get the monkeys? I don't know.

He had five heart attacks by the age of 62. Like, at some point, like, God is trying to tell you something. I actually wonder if the monkeys themselves were full of hate. Maybe. He was nice. What if they choose racist monkeys and, like, bigoted monkeys? Someone needs to explain? Transphobic monkeys?

Transmobic transplant hearts Yes That sounds like a Postal Service album What is the monkey thing? So Dick Cheney had three Transplanted monkey hearts Baboon hearts You had a human hearts

You had baboon hearts No he had a human Some guy died on a bicycle And he got his heart Well that was just for fun That was the one he had on the side In addition to his So he's had five hearts in his body

Three Three total hearts None of them had We can't live with monkey hearts. They're monkey hearts. No, we can live with pig hearts for up to nine months. Some dude just died. Whoa.

But Christian Slater got that baboon heart in that movie where he played hockey. And he was fine. Yeah, he wouldn't lie to us. Does anyone here taste one of Dictaniards hearts? And the guy that died for his heart wasn't the guy that he shot because the guy that he shot, the pellet got lodged and then later that guy had a heart attack. He had so many heart attacks, he was giving him out to, like, other people. That's awesome.

You know Dick Cheney shot that dude in the face, and he's like, sorry, we're going to have to keep you alive for years. Just in case. You know, at some time, though, I miss him. He had a vision for the country, and yeah, it was to take over every other country, but he had a vision. He at least cared about America. He was passionate about something. They go, he was a big supporter of the Vietnam War. but didn't ever serve.

And I was like, like a rack. And every other war he started, maybe? He loved our side in it. He did. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He really, really did. He loved war. He loved to win it.

But that was about it. But I bet he loved to eat pussy. Oh. You think? Just smart. Yeah, with a fork and knife. Not well. Yeah.

Yeah. No, that's not long chaney. That's right. That's right. Do you guys know our show? Um, I don't know. Hopefully people do. Oh, man.

So Dick Cheney's dead. What else did he do that was horrible about Dick Cheney? Let's go through his crimes a little bit. He was the one that his chiefest staff, first of all, he hired someone named Scooter Libby. And then that guy leaked information. And I'm like, you mean Scooter can't keep a secret? I love, I miss a cute guy in government. Like a little cute guy in charge of a genocide.

There's like just something fun and cute. his name like Flipper Flipper Jackson And Flipper Jackson They're like Flipper Jackson has called them to do more airstrikes

You're like Flipper no Flipper I can't do the noise Flipper's enacted a genocide but you can't get mad because he's cute He can bounce a ball

on his nose Yeah You all know that the real Flipper committed suicide on Henry's birthday Yeah suicide by cop

Very difficult for a dolphin Yeah Very difficult That was a very engaged dolphin. Was he jumping back into the ocean and the cop got in midair? He had taped two glocks to his fins

and he was doing one of those back things. And it was a little too wild. He had somehow scratched out BLM with a conch shelf. He decided to handle that. He was just sad that his whole family were rapists. Yeah. People don't know that. People don't know that about dolphins.

Dolphins are, they will protect you or they will rape you. There's two options. Same with otters. Otters, everyone thinks otters are great. Otters. I'm scared as fuck about going. We're supposed to go see these stupid stingrays. Uh-oh.

Sting race killed Steve Irwin. No, not these stingrays. We're supposed to go and hang out. We're paying money to go hang out with the assassin fish of the stupid ocean. And what are we going to do? You're so soft. I'm so soft. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Every single time we do something in nature, we almost get killed. I'd be so impressed if a stingray got through your breasts. Oh, man. But yeah, tomorrow, is anyone else swimming with pigs and stingrays tomorrow? A couple? Yeah, oh, two days from now. I don't know what I'm doing.

Yeah, and we don't know the schedule. Hell yeah. You can still do it tomorrow. It's just a different experience. It's in the pool with the rest of the people on this boat. Honestly, I'm really appreciative of the fact that they're going to have a tasting menu afterwards. Oh, of all the things you saw now this is what they tasted like. You eat the slowest swimmers, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's what we got over here. This is just a slow one? Mm, man. The slowest one. You just got to be faster than the slowest person. Always. But that's the problem, though, is that, like, my second fastest sperm has got to be such a waste

of life like that second most fast sperm has to just God, I mean, what's you going to be doing? Yeah. I'm saying, probably softball ref. Yeah. Sorry, softball ref is the worst shop

I could think of at the time. Man, I smoked... Softball ref? Yeah. Why? I don't know. Just boring? Yeah, stupid. Yeah, stupid sport.

Wasted time. I was going to go with like, like shooting squad person. Like a firing squad? Yeah, firing squad. I couldn't think of, yeah, like being that person. That's fun as hell, though. Yeah, I mean, I've been down firing squad.

Oh, we have some executioners here? Oh, wow, they're a big pop for firing squad. Because they just brought back the firing squad in South Carolina. And in Utah, when they do the firing squad, it's two blanks and a real one. In South Carolina, all real bullets. I actually liked that better. Yeah. I was talking recently to Dick Harpoolian

And he was saying he's the guy who Flex? First of all, flex. Yeah. Yeah, we hang out. We hang out. We buy people together. And he was a senator for North Carolina who advocated for the firing squad.

And I was like, all right, why? You know? And he said that it's a myth that one person doesn't have one. And they always all have one. And that's like, it's like an old wives tale that like we've all repeated to each other. but they all killed the motherfucker.

That's the state of Utah lies then in their official documentation. I mean, is that how you found out? No, that is. I found out because I was on TikTok just trying to scroll and it was the press conference after they had just firing squatted that guy in March. And there was an AP reporter who was a little too jovial who was like, this is my 12th execution and it's the third type. I finally seen all three.

And it was like, everyone in the comments was like, bro. He hit for the cycle. Dude, he fucking surprised that trick right there. That's chair injection. And firing squad, lucky? Dude, Patrick. I want to see all. The holy trinity of live

executions. Well, you know, our favorite, Chad Daybell, he has volunteered for the firing squad. And I can't imagine being such a lucky person to be able to shoot him right in the Winnie the Pooh

gut. What a great opportunity to just fuck up and shoot him in the leg. They're like, so why are you applying to the Department of Corrections? You have a successful podcast. Yeah, I brought my own skeets. We're doing it buck, bookshot style. Like he's a, like he's a deer.

That's right. Are you supposed to go for the stomach? No. The heart or the head, I believe. Okay. Harpoolian said that, I think, yeah, it's all for the heart. Everyone aims for the heart. And what was the other one? He said that too many people applied for the job.

Whoa, yeah? I mean, it's crazy that a guy who almost sounds like, Like his name is Harpoon. He was like, we should shoot people in the heart to kill him. Yeah. And you're like, did you mean a gun? He's like, yeah, I guess a gun. No, but, or we introduce the fourth way.

There you go. And Harpoon. Harpoon. We harpoon him. Harpoonlyan. They distance is firing squad. So you got to be really, you got to be sharp. Man, that'd be cool.

You get a big gnarly sailor man out there. He's got his big weird, like hat tipped. And he's like, yeah, hold, hold me pipe, my boyfriend. He says, Steady! Because y'all know Popeye was gay. Come on, y'all

know Popeye was gay. Why do you think his forearms was that big? It's from Jack and dudes off. Jack and dudes off save his life lest they execute him. And that's how Cream Spinich was invented. That's how you get him to open that throat.

Popeye's a throat goat. That's a throat goat. That's a throat goat. You know he's so. That's why olive oil always looks so fucking pissed Because she's like, Papa, I don't want that D. And he's like, I actually find it kind of interesting Because I do think of that in this dynamic, like Bluto

It's obviously pining for Which one was Bluto? The big, strong man. Oh, the one with the cigar? We actually feel like in a way, in this version of this, he's a hero. Yeah. Because it sounds like he's the only one willing to give olive oil dick.

Yeah, yeah. He's like, I'm trying to lay it down. And we, to be honest, I think there's a lot more, we talk, we don't talk enough about that in society. Women who need dick and the men that are just there willing to give it. And how sometimes we all got to lower that bar just to entry level. To entry level. And yes, in order to get the dick that you crave and you just can't, you just can't care about what the dick is or what it looks like. No.

It's like getting the job you want. If you can get your foot. Put in the door. Yes. Move up. Because she could get Bluto to shave. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

She could get Bluto to lose weight. She could get Bluto to dress better. If you get in there at the bottom floor and you fix you, you get them addicted sexually. Yeah. And with food. Yeah. Then you just, then you own his, you own him. Yes.

And then you change him. You recon him. You build them from the inside out. I think, I think we need a Popeye reboot is what it sounds like. We can make him better. Porto Papi. That'd be good. Popper in the eye, yeah, yeah, yeah.

All I know is with a woman named Olive Oil, you definitely don't need lube. No. She is ready to go at all times. Do you think the captain of this ship has huge-ass forearms like that? And is it from driving the ship? I don't know. It ain't power steering.

Shaking all these hands, you know. Do they still use the big wheel to turn ships? Yes. Really? Oh, yeah. I just made that up. I figured it was like a button. days, but if there's a big wheel...

Is there a big wheel? Here's the thing's had in my cabin. Who's been up to the cockpit? Who's on the cockpit tour? All day, I was trying to get to the bridge, which is hard because you can't just walk up to someone and be like, hey, how do you get to the bridge? Take me to the bridge. Take me to the goddamn bridge, man.

All right, James Brown. We're about to do the... We're about to do the Captain Phillips story on Thursday, and I'm like, that's how those people got in trouble with the Navy is to come up and be like, give me the bridge. So I just was like, how do you maybe take a tour? It's $130. Tomorrow, 9 a.m. What?

You weren't kidding when you said it was $130. No, I was not kidding. They charged for us to go look at them work. Thank you. What the fuck is this? Hershey factory? I'm trying to see. That's his job.

The engine control room, whoever's shoveling the coal or however it works down there, I don't know. I haven't seen it yet. I didn't sell it 130 bucks. This is a steamboat. Yeah, this is steam.

Yeah, it's just saw steam and a big. You're pushing the paddle on the back. Yeah. Why are there no nuclear cruises? clean energy yeah fuck all these clean energy cruises fuck this shit right

fuck coral I've used every towel in my room and I haven't even showered I'm excited I don't care I blew my nose into one threw it out into the water I took the other one

just shat into it to practice through that in the water they're all in the water so yeah I do need a new set housekeeping just whatever

I had an exorcet crisis in the shower this morning. I was just like, how much water's on this boat? How long can I stay in this thing? I know we can't use the seawater. How much the fresh water is here? They should tell us how long our showers should be. And I'm just like, I need to get out of the shower. I do believe that they take

our piss and make it the shower water. So think about that. And I don't know if I'm just saying that into a microphone again. And I have no idea if that's real or not. People are going to stop showering with their mouth open. other people are going to start showering with our mouth open.

Now that you've told us all that. There are a lot of Europeans on board. There's a lot of Dutch guys. If you guys want free money, if you guys want free drinks and food from a Dutch guy, just pissing his mouth. I'm sorry, guys. It's 3.15.

We're 15 minutes into this. This is great. That's nice, yeah. Did you know how to use the shower, though? It took me 20 minutes to turn it on. I got it. I have to call my husband in, which makes me seem like a helpless little woman. What the fuck is with these shower things?

They are confusing, but, you know, you fiddle with it until it gets hot, like a lady. There he is. That's what Tommy did. That's what he knows. He got it going. Y'all have two kids. He knows how to do that. She's done.

And then just like with a lady, you're done with that shower about a minute and a half. Slam the door. Just sitting there like, I existentially. Like, how wet can she get? I don't know how much it's in her. Dude. I had an existential crisis on the balcony last night. About 1 a.m.

I told my husband, I want to turn off all the lights. And then I just, I go, oh, God. I said, I just want to go stare into the abyss, essentially. And I got a little too close to the rail. And I had to go back a little bit to do my staring. But goddamn, everybody should consider a precipice if momentarily every once in a while in their lives. But right there, right there, you just said the big issue.

What's that? It's how close you got to the rail. Yeah, I was like... Live from your blade. The year is 2012. The setting. New York City. There are a thousand stories in the naked city.

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Enjoy the mysteries. And guys, we want to say, first of all, number one, raise your hands if you're a white woman who's missing. Two or there, too. She's supposed to be on the celebrity. It's a problem on cruises. Y'all women too curious. I didn't mean it.

It is a female issue. It's our fault. Yes. We're too in love with the ocean And we get too close And we just Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah

It's just like Oh my God It's flounder And you're a dead woman Right? Because there's no hope In getting you No

Okay You will not survive If you hit the water You're gonna turn into a million pieces I said last night On the balcony I feel like I could survive

If I jumped feet first And we're on the ninth floor I don't know if that's crazy That's, yeah, I think that's incorrect. You were just too excited for Mom Dani. Yeah, that is a Mondani excitement move. I did say halfway down, I would be like, holy shit, this is way higher than it looked, but by then I'm fucked. I don't think you die, get in the water as much as just get ripped up by the bottom of the boat.

I'm like, you're sucked under. Harris just told me I'd freeze to death, but the boat sounds way worse. The big story. Because obviously, everybody here is aware of the Amy Bradford. story. I just watched the doc. I binged it before the trip. Hilarious. You know? It's important to do it. We did a two or three

part series on it. And yeah. What do you think? Still missing? Still missing? Can we? Yeah. She is still missing. This is a big, obviously, this is everyone, this is a true crime cruise. Every one of you has an arcane

Byzantine opinion about every single true crime story. So know that we're going to probably get you angry. no matter what we did. Yeah. So I would say is what's your main theory about Amy Bradley? My main theory is when we were doing research for the show,

I like to pull newspaper articles at the time that these incidents happened because it's one thing to hear somebody talk about something that happened in 1995 and what they have to say in 2025. Well, what her family kind of had to say in 1995 sort of kind of led more to she did not ever get off the boat. And then all of the other tips and things that came after started being piled of like maybe she got off or maybe whatever. But the initial timeline and the initial descriptions

that her folks and her brother gave to the newspapers indicated to me it was a most likely scenario overboard situation. Okay, because right now they're saying she was missing from like 530 to 6, right? Correct. Before she was officially reported missing. There are conflicting things, but I would like to say that they did not sound the alarm

for her at 6 a.m. because they didn't want to disturb the passengers but what the fuck was with that alarm this morning at 7 that made me shit in my towel and throw it overboard I was dead fucking asleep but they won't do it for a missing lady

yeah that's why like to me I just think it's y'all guys are just so nice and sweet and just sometimes you just blip you know what I mean like that's the problem that's a nice lady we all our ladies Everybody likes all the ladies we're with, you know?

But sometimes a lady just goes, we just flip over, yeah. And then just like, and then the problem is that when you go blip, it's like so fast. We are top-heavy, so it's, yeah, it's... Tits take you straight to Davy Jones's locker. I should know, I'm a bit-titted man. I'm a bit-titted man, I have to strap them up.

I have a different theory, actually. Please. My theory, and this is not, I'm not being facetious. I think she got off the ship briefly when it docked in hopes of getting drugs and quickly found out that was not the plan of the people that were going to sell her the drugs. Oh, sure. Yeah, that can definitely happen. Oh, yes.

Very much so. And that is also super crucial for everyone to remember out here is to never go to a second location. Yeah. Because she just don't go, right? You go right there. You get your hair braided by the person right there. Yeah, right, right. Don't go to their house for it.

Don't go to their house, right? You get it right there. The Jamaican beef patty, like genuine place was right there. You don't got to go far. You know what I mean? So I guess that's a good thing to know. And also just stop, drop, and roll. Yeah.

That's just good advice. In case you catch on fire. Yes. Well, I feel like the more you're rolling, the harder. The less you're falling off the shit. I mean just, though, if you're getting trafficked. Oh. Stop dropping.

Go dead weight, yeah. Dead weight. Yeah, dead weight. Dead weight or pretend to have had a stroke. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean this. I think about, no, I've always been like, if I get kidnapped, I'm going to pretend to have a seizure. Yeah.

Yeah, because they don't like damage goods. No. Sorry, guys. They said, like, I'm being honest here. This is boat honesty. For sure. If you get held hostage, for real, they tell you, don't be like too much freaking out, but don't be too much of an asshole.

But if you act, like, weak, then they do not want a damage product. And also, just act crazier than the crazy person. I don't know if that still works, but that's always my plan. You're not going to want to go ahead and get that me because I'm unvaccinated. Robert F. Kennedy? You're not going to want to deal with me because I'm just the general history. They're like, we've got to get this guy back to run the Department of Health and Human Services. Truth is the healthiest place you can be in the middle of the crew shit.

You got to eat the poop on the poop crew. I told y'all I told you my mother-in-law was on the poop cruise So did she shit in bags like they should have? She had to Sorry mama but she did have to The best part though is because they interviewed all these people for that

And the people on there are like It was the worst thing that ever happened And you know I asked my mother-in-law and she was like Everybody working was doing such a good job They were trying so hard I was like she didn't want to like hate on the workers She's like I wasn't the one out there Having to pick the bags up

I was like that Fair enough. I will say, though, she didn't ever get a free cruise. They said, but she was going to take it, so there's that. Yeah, it's like, you're going to put me back in hell? She's been on, like, several more cruises since the poop cruise. It did not stop her from cruising. Cruising is an addiction.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. How many people here are cruise people? Wow, just one, just two. You should all meet up. Get on a signal channel. Do you the guys putting the upside-down pineapples on shit? Because everybody, apparently on the international waters, marriage rules are also super fucking loose. Yeah, I saw my rules on the open water.

There was a lady with a big ass pineapple tattoo on her leg, but it was right side up. But I was like, in the right circumstances, it could be upside down. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Probably in the circumstances, she needs it to be upside down the most. Arguably. Excuse my ignorance. What does an upside down pineapple mean? Oh, somebody show them.

somebody showed me an old-fashioned way someone fuck his wife it means you're open for swinging oh really so you get an upside down pineapple tattoo and everyone's like oh yeah we're partying but it's mostly you're just like oh no I was in the mirror oh fuck

no I'm gonna get cooked I don't know I think this is also a good time for all of us because you brought up the poop crews it's to make a solemn vow to all of ourselves that when they say shit in the bags we shit in the bags what happened on that cruise only happened

because they didn't shit in the bags they felt they were above it and we're not above it are we no we're a bunch of troll pigs yeah we know dogs we know what shit bags honestly I'd rather shit in a bag I feel connected to my pet I hate how the cat

shit's open yeah truly shitting in these toilets is like shitting in a shop vac because it just sucks it out of you So the bag might be a welcome difference. It might be relaxing. You joke? And you could go on your balcony to do it. You fucking joke.

Legitimately. Don't drop anything. This morning. Henry Zabrowski. I was having issues. You just. I created a suction seal. Hit that fucking booty.

Hit that booty sucker. Did you see that? You could pop up on you? It pulled the last little bit out. That's great. Why did the trash can have a picture? Hell yeah, man. Make it work for you.

That's free. You ever read Chuck Pollanick? Yes, yes. That's what I learned it from. Oh, from the swimming pool. Yeah, where it sucks his intestines out of his asshole. His whole asshole. I remember that book.

And I held on tight. But I wondered why there's a picture of a banana on the trash can that says, don't flush these things down the trash, but it sounds like you've answered. So you might need it. Well, it had a really hard time with the grapefruit. I was mashing him down. He was mashing it down. That's probably what happened to Amy Bradley.

You got sucked down. Sat down the toilet. That's a real thing they did. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I would, would you rather be sucked down the toilet on an airplane or cruise ship? Are we on mushrooms right now? Not too much. Yeah.

I think I'd rather be sucked down on a cruise ship. I feel like it's more spacious down there. Like in Star Wars, you know? Like, there's probably a monster, though, I imagine. Sunnet lives down there. I was thinking when you get sucked out, you get either spit into the battles of the ocean or the open air.

Do they, what happens? Does that not happen when things get flushed? What happens with all the poop? What do you mean? It goes into a tank. But they don't shoot it in the water? No! Of course not.

Isn't human filth natural? No, there's fucking thousands of us. It would be horrible. There's one big... Just mine alone this morning. Would have been a nightmare. But how does coral grow? I don't know, man.

But I was out there with a bottle of bleach this morning. I'm doing my part. Shining those fuckers up, David. I did. I actually felt really good. I took a seagull and I sprayed it with some hairspray.

Keep it safe. Love it out of here, man. These excursions are amazing. The stuff that you can do out here. I feel like, though, like everyone on this cruise that at least if you're in this room and you're back on the ship, you're not getting trafficked.

Yeah, we're back. Because Nassau would have been the spot. It's not happening on Cocoa. If you get traffic on K, it's your phone. You're going to see yourself. I actually think you just get hired. They're like, where are you from? Where are you from?

We got to make you a name tag. All right. I got 12 cheeseburgers, three chicken sandwiches. Oh, fuck, go. I'm on a 6th time. Would do. I think Amy Bradley was traffic, though. You think so?

I think so. Yeah, I really do. After watching the whole thing and I was, at first I was like, yeah, she got, you know, she fell off and she got sucked up. But that guy was so confident that the currents come in and go like, even if she got eaten by a sharp. we'd find part of her. Interesting. You know, and so I'm like,

this hand, like this one, and this foot's over here. We don't know where these, but we make them kiss. No, that's the thing. That guy is,

he's found lots of body parts so I trust him. Yeah. You know, and so I don't think so. And then there was the other dude, the old guy, I know there was like

the horrible dudes like, yeah, I almost bought her. You know, but like that was awful. But like there was the other guy who just met her on the beach. Yeah,

I took a day and her nice side of yeah, enough window. shapping for today. The one that worked for the Coast Guard that she'd said, my name is Amy Bradley,

please get me out of this brothel and he just didn't say anything because he didn't want to get caught. That guy's a scumback. I'm talking about the guy on the beach. He was like a photographer. He was like on vacation. I trusted that guy. He was very shooketh about what happened

and was like, I saw the picture. It was like, that's her. So maybe she swam ashore. She had that, she had that freaking tattoo. You know, I mean, how many Tasmania devil tattoos we got in the room?

Exactly. Well, this is just on one cruise. That's surprising. I thought at least one person would have a tennis tattoo. It was the 90s. So how many people got a Pikachu? No one really. Technically, it is the Harry Potter

Death Hollow tattoo is the 2000s version of it. Here we go. The Deathly Hollow tattoo is that version. Oh, okay. That's how they identify your body, ma'am. Deathly Hollow. that's disgusting I don't think your body would be hollowed out at all

even though I think your organs are valuable and I would pay top dollar for them just looking at you what a compliment that's what ladies that's how you get in ladies' pants I know a good mile of intestines when I see you good

she's like a real life blind bag You just open it up and see what's inside. Yeah, yeah. And you get excited with whatever it is. I feel bad for whoever tried to steal my kidneys, man. Those things are fucked. Yeah. I'm like, they just shove him back in.

They're like, oh, sail. We got a sale. I need to return these, sir. Like, I wonder, though, like, because obviously the bear population is very rarely trafficked. But I feel like, there should be, like, like, some. somewhere, some contingent of chubby men in a brothel.

That has to be. Don't get me wet, Henry. But seriously, there has to be a market for chubby man as well. Like a blue-to-looking fellow? Yeah, like, blue-to. Like, in my way, like, really,

like, is it, why do you never see that? You never hear about, like, a brothel that's just big guys. Yeah. I think you have, if you know, you know, situation. Like, you got to know people to get in. Why, though? I figured that they'd be, like, men...

That's a great question. Men advertise dick all day. I'm for body positivity. All bodies are beautiful. I just don't know why. I'm actually just kind of confused about the statistics. Because they feel like, you know, it would be good to get one of each. Especially because big burly dudes are often sailors.

Sailors, ports, ports, nefarious things. I don't know. Yeah, no, it's far away from the women you love. I just feel like you want to get everybody. You want to get, you want to get a beautiful woman. You want to get a nerdy Asian guy. You want to get a fun black guy. You want to get the whole thing.

Is it a breakfast club? Yeah. That's the idea. You want to put them all together on a team. Yeah, it's like a sitcom. Yeah. You've got to represent everybody. Cast it.

Yeah. Cast it. Central casting. We need a casting brothel. Yeah. I feel like a fat man's brothel should sell soup, you know? Just, you know, do really lean into the broth part of it. Oh, nice.

A mat's a broth. Only broth. Oh, that's cute. You can build your own broth. That's cute. Suck a guy's dick who's eating soup. What are we going? You get to dip it in the chowder and make chowder.

Oh, like a breadstead. That's a breadstead. And then the lady's wing is the clam chowder. And the clam bake. I'm sorry, everybody. I'm sorry, everybody. This is the first thing you're all hearing and you're like, this is the first show of this entire band.

I am pretty much going to guarantee the other ones are going to be more focused. Amy Brugley is missing. There she is. She is still missing. There she is over there. Well, I did want to look up because, like, for our discussion, I was looking up true crime that it happened in Nassau around this area. And surprisingly enough, nothing.

Well, you're saying, that's good news. No, actually, quite a bit. There's been quite a bit of quite. There's been quite a bit. But the one, there was one guy's name that I actually thought was quite interesting. Dr. Machete. Dr. Machete. Strangely enough, killed people with a plunger.

He had such an opportunity there. But there was a guy with the name of Makaya Shobach that was a tourist murderer. Not tourists, not like me. It's coming up. Tourist moons next month. But he would come out to, like basically he'd be on a, it seemed to be a Royal Caribbean cruise or like anything you can get. He would come out and he would kill on the excursion. He'd go out.

He would find somebody. essentially like in a form of cruising he would cruise his way to cruise out on the island and then he'd find a guy and kill him and come back and he did it four times damn and that's a cruise guy did he got caught yeah he got caught he loved cruising there was just something about it that he really understood and he understood that you can go missing quite quickly out there yeah especially you said the 70s yeah oh yeah it was easy to go missing the 70s take the boat out of it I just didn't know how far like cruises even were going.

You were even explaining to me that Merv Griffin kind of built up Paradise Island, yeah, that's his joint. Yeah, that they came in to just sort of like, they're like, yeah, shame, yeah, we're out here with the coconut, see? And then they like created a whole new economy and then that has repercussions.

That does indeed. You wanted to create like the Vegas of the Caribbean, kind of. And honestly, that's such a better idea than Vegas. It is. There's water. Yeah, it's not as hot. Yeah.

I love Vegas, though. No, it's fun. I like Vegas. I love the fact that it's corrupt on its face. Yeah. I like the fact that everything's for sale and they tell you. Yeah. It's honest.

It's honest. Everything's not like the goddamn captain who's been charging us $130. To go make sure he's not taking us to Asia. There's a collection place. God knows what he's doing in that room. We don't know where this boat's going. And if you want to know, you've got to cough up some money. so please pass around the hat and put a couple of dollars in it and send us.

We'll let you know what they're doing on the bridge. Are you getting a cut? Wait a second. They did make me a name tag. I took it off before we got up here. Have you been trafficked already? It is a part of this? I just want to say welcome aboard Royal Caribbean.

No! Oh, they got it! No! The corporatocracy rules! You got corporate trafficked. I did, dude. It was bound to happen. You knew what was happening.

Live from North Lane. Well, we're excited. be in the Bermuda Triangle, though. Yeah. Now, I know from our series in the Bermuda Triangle many, many moons ago, that a lot of what happened, like a lot of the mysterious

disappearances have to do with ocean farts. Truly. Or like, yeah, the Sargassan Sea, like the area where just like, there's a part of the sea where the wind sort of stops, so stay away from that. What? What? What is it? What is it? That's like Native American curse.

The D. The Diaspora. It starts with a D. What is it somebody? The doldrums. Yes, the doldrums. Where, like, there's no wind in the sea and you just have to wait for, like, current...

So they just named it after being sad? Yeah. They're like... Because it gives you time to think when you're just out there, like, am I going to get rescued? No. Well, do you guys know just specifically how many people have gone missing in the Bermuda Triangle?

Are you a big Bermuda Triangle people? Not a huge... I'm not a huge tributte. head, but I'm willing to learn. But no, I mean, the problem is you get an area like that. It's kind of like the Bridgewater Triangle. Stuff starts to get attributed to it when it's sort of like

on the edges of it, on the fringe of it. Oh, yeah, yeah. I don't think that triangle is hard angles. No, what is funny because they'll be like, there's so many disappearances. But now that we have GPS and computers, they've sort of gone down a little bit. I'm like, so the mystery doesn't like science. Is that what we're saying?

Yeah. Okay. It doesn't like maps. Yeah. I know that one tip of the Bermuda triangle hits Fort Lauderdale and then that was very evident to me growing up in South Florida because every time I would visit Fort Lauderdale my car would go missing

I forgot him and didn't your father go missing? Yes Yes he did. From your family Yeah yeah yeah and then I found most of them but his legs were gone still and so it was You gotta go find that guy who found all the pieces

of people he probably hasn't yeah yeah he's a daddy's ankle yeah y'all grew up in Florida though Did you have as much of a fear of the Bermuda Triangle as we did growing up in Texas very far from it? I did a book for it on an eighth grade that really shaped my worldview that I really thought I was going to get taken by it at some point. We were told to be afraid of the Cubans. Oh, okay. And the idea that Florida was going to be the front lines.

That you're going to have to fight for freedom? Yeah, and we're all like, I'm in theater. You're like, we'll make a musical. Well, unfortunately, they don't have to wait for all rehearsals of West Side Story to be over. But then don't worry, I shall be on the front lines. Papa, a costume. Fighting the Maduro forces of Fidel Castro. I was down here during the whole Ellen Gonzalez stuff.

Oh, wow. That was, like, that was crazy. It was all in the news. But I just loved that, like, dolphin saved him and stuff and, like, brought him to shore. And didn't rape him. Yeah, they didn't rape him. Which shows, again, it's not about the being child molesters. No one ever said a dolphin was a child molester.

No, they like full-grown men Dolphins have a specific kink and we're not shaming it, okay? No, they're just like a screaming man. Which a lot of people like. Those dolphins, they take those men from behind. Of course, I'm talking about the Miami Dolphins. Nice.

I remember, like, Ellie and Gonzales, there was always, like, cameras outside of his house and stuff. and he, like, it went straight to his head. He would just, like, come out and just be like, Hi, hello, everyone. Hi, hello. Like Princess Diana, just waved from this stupid, everyone. I don't remember.

We, didn't we, like, we, like, shot his, shot him in the head or something, right? No, we, we, we, we, when they finally got him, he was hiding in a closet and they had, like, an AR-15 pointed in his head. I remember the picture, yeah. Yeah, but then we just sent them back. Yeah. What happened to him?

Oh, you know, he's having a little. a great time. See, whatever happened to Ellie and Gonzalez. Whatever it turns out that he's Benson Boone or something? We found out. It's like Katie Perry is Jean-Vinay is what people think. I love the idea that Katie Perry is Jean-Beney. Because wouldn't that be crazy

that that means Justin Trudeau is fucking John Bonnet Ramsey. Yeah. And also means John Bonnet Ramsey went to space. Wow. She had an amazing life. What an amazing life she's had. That's amazing. Did you love that?

Russell Brands? Wow. Did you love that? The guy at the restaurant yesterday who was like, who killed John Bonnet Ramsey? And we're like, can I have the salmon, please? Yeah, man. He found out. I don't know if you guys are getting it one by one as seeing the lanyards having the true crime thing, but it was true.

Having that man be like, I just want to know. He was like, we had this, the thing. He was like, what's your pet theory? about John Bonnet and he had like a referee shirt on he had no teeth and he was just like my theory she was killed by hit man

and I was just like I believe the same thing we started talking hardcore like I totally believe it was with the maid and the cook and they helped the guy get in through the basement and I don't believe it's the brother and we had a great time

it took him like an hour to bring the food though Yeah, yeah, it was like, all right, well, let's get into the bottom of another mystery after the appetizers drop. I have an Elian Gonzalez update. Oh, he still lives in the house he grew up in. In Cuba? Yeah. Oh, so he didn't do jack shit. He didn't try to come back once.

Oh, damn. He's like, oh, look. Let me look at America. Are there less guns? No, but it's bedews. He said his nice is simple. I still remember how that AR-15 tastes. Yeah. He's married and has a young daughter.

And her name is Eli's in honor of his mother Elizabeth who died at sea during the ill-fated attempt to escape from Cuba. God damn. So there's that update. Hey, sorry your mom died. Anyway. Oh, wait a minute. He was elected to a seat in the Cuban National Assembly. He represents the city of Cardenas.

There you go. So he didn't do nothing with his life. That's huge. That's big if you hadn't got back down to that spot. I don't know. That's my bad. Let that be a lesson. I should read the whole article.

If the U.S. government holds you at gunpoint, you can go on to be something. Yeah. Yeah. That's a good lesson for all of us right now, given. Yes. Because there's a good chance half of us get taken by gunpoint, by ice, probably at some point. Not today. Not today.

Not today. They were like, yeah, when you get back, they might want to look through the pictures of your phone. I was like, I have 18,000 pictures on my phone and like 12,000 are screenshots and like 10,000 are J.D. Vance's face. Lock me up. Good luck. You think it's bad luck for Ellen Gonzalez

to name his daughter after his mother who got lost at sea? Yeah, well, yeah. You should have named her a better name like Amelia Earhart or another missing woman. Something that survives the ocean, like, cracking.

Yeah. Like the Crackin. The Cracket's a woman? Dope, maybe. Could be. Could be. Whoa. I think it's non-binary.

Yes, please. Talk about a Shiro. Yes, we know. Yes. Of course Cracken. The woman released the Cracken, of course. What does the legend of the Cracken come from? It's a Caribbean thing, right?

No, it is Icelandic. Yeah, I think it started in East that where you just said. Island. Eastland. I saw you say it in Mighty Ducks talk. You know, and it's another one of those things where it was like, man, When people didn't have glasses or big-ass binoculars, they were like, you won't believe it.

There were octopuses the size of the Empire State Building. And now it's like, and where are they now? They're like, climate change, man. Man. It's like that's why we don't see it. But think about, they talk about the siren song of the mermaid, and they turned out to me, they said, oh, there were manatees. How many manatees are getting railed by the weirdest pirates they ever met?

Just like, they got out there and they're like, Ars too late. I gave too far. I got to fuck this. thing. The manatees are by the shore. You're lazy. I was going for one in the back.

I wanted one that wasn't picked over by my boys. Touch them now. It's illegal to pet them, isn't it? You can't pet them. You're illegal to pet them, but if they touch you, you could you can let it happen.

Okay, okay. Listen, I looked at the regulations, okay? I wasn't doing anything wrong on that that piece. That sounds like like Sammy Hagar. rules. You know, like, I can't touch you, man, but if you touched me first?

God damn. Well, we were, because we did a show about witchcraft a couple weeks ago, and in our research, we found a book that was like sea magic and how you can, like, conjure up gods from the depths. So if y'all want to meet us on deck 12 later on tonight, I don't know, maybe.

Oh, God, no. That's too much feminine energy combined. That just scares. me. I felt that. Well, we're all going to fall overboard afterwards. It doesn't matter. Because I would say it really feels good that Eddie and I are the white man

representation on this cruise. Because it's very often, it's not very often that we're the only kind of guys here. And it's nice in a way. It's nice to be amongst you women. I love Henry that you said, we're the only

kind of guys. You know? We're kind of guys. Do you need, how much period blood do you need on deck seven for the magic? A tablespoon. Table spoon. Who's got their cup in?

Diva. Who's saving their period blood on their cruise? Where are our divas at? Nah, damn. Yeah. I'm scared of those. If you got a diva cup in? Her friend got one stuck in her.

Got stuck to the wall. Really? Got stuck to the wall. Her boyfriend had to, she had to go on all fours and he had to, you have to, P-S-A, he had to, you got to break the seal with the fingernail? Nice. What happened?

Was she in, like, a bunch of weird temperatures too fast? I don't know. I think it just went to the side. Like, I don't know. She went on a cruise and took a, she took a shit and flushed it in the middle of it. Hell yeah. Oh, dick. Oh.

Holy shit. Hell yeah. That's a true writer. I was like, I thought he was hot before. And I was like, damn, like, that takes you up a couple of notches in my book. Well, to be honest, that's just what, that's like why you get married. For sure. Yeah.

That's like these things that you're going, like, you don't get married. I mean, obviously, for the sex. Hey. But a lot of times you're getting married because you got to guarantee somebody that is going to be there when something horrifically. Like, it's. You need a procedure. Somebody, yeah. Another accident.

I was using your diva cup on my hemorrhoids. I just. Yeah, yeah. It's the shame. It's the thing that only your wife sees. But no one will ever see. Or your wife is the only, it's gonna see your butthole a lot. It is, it is.

It's too intimate. Don't look at my tank, we have to do it. Because you can't get down there yourself. No. You heard your bad. Bobby Brown, that's true love when he pulled that shit out of Whitney's ass. You're wearing the shirt.

I'm glad that we're saying. And he's wearing the Whitney's shirt. He's wearing the Whitney's shirt. Oh, wow. Wow. I want to dance with somebody. That's what that song was about. When the Houston's last movie was Sparkle, but what she needed was a snorkel.

Come on. This is a true crime fucking cruise. I was explaining before because everyone was like, it was like, oh, we don't want to like say anything too offensive and we don't make people upset while we're on this true crime cruise, as you can see. Because it's a mixed crowd.

You don't really know. But in my mind, it's, I feel like we can take it. Yeah, yeah, it's true crime, right? Take it? Yeah. We're all going to take it. We're not like that old lady that was left behind on Lizard Island who got picked apart by a bunch of lizards because she was fucking weak. Did you hear about this?

This happened in Australia last week. There was a cruise in Australia and it stopped at this place called Lizard Island for an expedition. And they forgot an old lady. You go where a guy named Jim Morrison will eat your ass for 50 dollars. Wait, wait, wait. What was the cruiser? What? What cruise line was this?

It's some Australian cruise line, so we're safe. Down under. But yeah, there's nothing on Lizard Island except lizards, and they left her there, and they ate her. Are there like heel monsters? All types of lizards? Well, I don't know. Australian lizards. Gila monsters are in Arizona.

Well, shit. Yeah, you know, if a geala monster, if they're crazy, if they latch onto you, in order, the only way you can get them off of you is if you drown them. Whoa. Like Whitney Houston. That took a turn. Every time. How are you going to be closer to water?

Dude, every time every time we talk about vermin, I'm always like, should I drown it in a bucket? And Christy's like, why do you always talk about drowning stuff in buckets? Now I know,

I need to keep a bucket in case I get bit by a Gila monster. When I caught a mouse in New York, that was the only way I felt comfortable was drowning it. Yeah. My husband just gets a big rock and smashes them.

No, I'm not doing that. We said we can take it, and then immediately everyone in a true crime thing went, oh. I didn't want to kill it. It was just, you know, in my way of the rest of my life. Yeah, no, I guess. The only thing I've ever drowned is a human woman. Yeah. I don't drown animals.

Have you seen that experiment where they have raw meat and gila monsters bite it and how it decomposes the meat over a course a few days? That's awesome. That's what it does to their prey. That's what happened to that old lady. Yeah, that's that old lady. And the only reason why, it's not that I don't feel bad for her. It's just, they tell you very clearly when to get back on the boat, don't they?

Listen, because she years since she was old? I don't know what she was. I think, unfortunately, the Gila Monster was clamped to her for China. But her kid gave her AirPods for Christmas and it just took her out. That's why you've got to pay attention You got to get back on the boat Or like me Don't get off the boat

And just eat breakfast And then second breakfast And then wait until the buffet Changes from breakfast to lunch And that way you keep your table That's a good tip I'm so glad This is what they've told her

Now that she works for the cruise line Exactly If you need reservations at the restaurant Please you are honestly Heather I got to say It is so refreshing to hear a lady be so correct about buffets and be so dialed into proper.

I'm like, I'm so happy with you. Like, that's like, that's special. Heather will be buried at a buffet. Truly, I grew up going to buffets and I grew up with my mom and taking Ziplog bags to the buffet. Yes. And guess who brought 10 Ziploc bags on the cruise?

Yeah. That's so smart. Hell yeah. Did your mom, did your parents do the thing? Because I was a whole, like, I always remember my father's, and you guys all remember this too. Best advice I ever heard about buffet. fuck the spaghetti go get the expensive stuff

don't waste your time on the bread don't get full on bread naughty don't get full you get full on meat you eat that meat you go to the expensive meat and you get that you hog up the expense of meat my poor dad would be trying to eat a salad and she's like what are you doing eating that lettuce the margins on that are so

on the way home we literally could get a bag of salad you can eat that to get it all down this is the time to eat the steak and the shrimp Get your money's worth. That's why when we went to all you can eat steak when night my dad ate seven steaks.

Oh! That's amazing. I think trailed us and RIP dad, but truly yeah. My dad is such a legend. That's just about to say and we just got to see it.

It's your dead dad so I'll let you tell it. My dad ate so many steaks at Texas Roadhouse and Mesquite. There is a memorial plaque up him right at the entrance when you're walking.

Wow. Wow. Shout out Bill McKinney. Shout out. Shout out, dude. You can't believe he died. Unrelated. I'm related.

I'm related. Turns out, cancer. Turns out. Cigarettes. Oh. Yeah. Well, that's get you hungry for the steak. That's right.

God damn. I remember once I was at a buffet with my family. We're a big buffet family. And I was... No way. Yeah, I know, right? The biggest baby in Florida was a buffet baby? Yes.

The biggest baby in Florida. That's right. That's right. You guys know that about me? 14 pounds, 13 and the half ounces. My mother loved her new Vananis. I'm just kidding. Surely it was a C-section, right?

No, actually, I was too big. They couldn't give her a C-section. Yeah, she had to get a double D-section. Yeah. Come on. Come on. Come on, good T-up. You're like, good T-O.

You're like, Byron Allen. That's amazing. That's great. Truth is, I'm like second or third biggest baby born in Florida now, but every time there's a new biggest baby born, I fly back and beat the shit out of it.

You get a bucket and you drown it like the mouse? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're keeping that title. Oh, my God. So I just did this tour in Florida, and Julie's, like, I was filming it and stuff, and Julie was like, you should meet other big babies. And I was like,

That's a great idea. I was like, would you mind? Like, I've been looking. I haven't been able to find any. She's like, a couple days later, we're drinking at the house just the two of us. And she's like, oh, I found one. I was like, what? She's like, yeah, he was 13 pounds, 13 ounces, smaller than me.

I was like, all right, good. I like being bigger. And she's like, he plays football. He's 10 years old. I was like, cool, just like me. He's like, he's got a dead mom. I was like, fuck yeah. I'm about to wreck this kid's life.

And she's like, here's his dad's information. You can DM him, whatever. And I was like, all right, cool, thank you. And then like, she went to bed. I kept drinking. And I was like, I just got, like, restless. And I was like, hey, um, I was a huge baby. Your son's nowhere near as big as me.

Actually, I was bigger. I heard your mom's dad. I'm coming to the state, and I want to see your boy. I really like to talk to your big boy. Who is this? Oh, I hope he replied. I hope he replied. No, I'm so lucky I'm not in prison.

He really, like, if he was a good father, he would have hunted me down and killed him. You have to stop asking to meet father's big boys. Who's got a big boy in the room? Who's got a big boy? Well, I'll follow you home. Honestly, there's some. big boys out in the ship. Yeah, there are.

Man, I did see a fat boy, and I was like, that's me. I was like, that's me. I like want to take him to the buffet and be like, yes, one's for you. You get that? There's nothing, honestly, there is just something heartwarming about a chubby cheek little ginger fuck just

slopping down macaroni and cheese and just love seeing their, God, their evil faces. All those little up on 11, they've got like an ice cream machine and a guy has to do it out so you don't fuck the machine up, I guess. And there were kids up there at like 10 a.m. just mashing it in their face.

Give it! Give it! Yeah, because their parents their parents are doing that with alcohol that the floor down and they're just letting them go. When we were watching the Flowrider yesterday, the kids that came up behind us, one of them goes, I just weighed myself. I've already gained two pounds.

I was like, what kind of this shit born? 10 a.m.? That was like, it's five. You already gained two pounds? Man, I miss being a kid. And that was, like, still cool. Yeah. He's like actively trying to kill yourself

with food. You're like, I hate as much I could, I threw up. Now when you're doing all your friends stage and intervention, instead you do the doctor. Now you've got to go to rehab. You're binging and purging,

and you're in a shame spiral. Did y'all make yourselves pass out as kids? Oh, yeah. I was so worried I killed my friend, but he woke up. It's like, we would do that, and then you're like,

oh, this is kind of like, without the jacking off, autoerotic expensity. It is. It's heavy really well. Yeah. Oh. That's an alarm telling us to start choking each other.

Yeah. The autoerotic asexication alarm. All right. It's four o'clock. All right. This is the only way I can come on a boat. Well, we couldn't afford the drink package, so. That's why they have the toilets.

You just got to. You just turn it right. Face forward. Yeah, face the toilet next time. Yes. Now, before we depart, is there any last, what true crime elements do we hope to see in the next couple of days before the end of our trip? Oh. My true crime element is I feel like, no matter where you're at, there's something you could see.

So, eyes up, there's got to be. I found two ducks accidentally, not crime wave ducks. One of them said, CRZ, D-K-S. Crazy dips. Or, thank you. Thank you. Yeah, it's crazy dick. You found the crazy dick duck?

I found the crazy dick. All dogs have crazy ducks, though. And then I found another duck that had a label on it. They said, if you find this, message Jim and Linda. And I was like, oh. I'm telling you. Where's that upside up? Hi, that people are.

Jim and Linda were watching the dog. They were just like, yeah, no, we got another one. Don't turn into the trap. My element is I want a lot of eyewitnesses. So keep your peepers up. and find some good shit and come tell me about it. Hell yeah. Oh, well, I'm hoping for stuff back on land

because death waits for no one. Oh. That's so dark. I love that. That's oddly, like, the most horrible thing said today. No, I like it. It makes me feel at home. Every day, I open the news, and I'm like,

oh. Soon. Did it happen tonight? Not today. Soon. We'll see, once he sees the other news, he might not. He might not.

We'd do very well at it. I wonder if, I hope Dick Cheney can die again. Yeah. That'd be great if we woke up tomorrow and they're like Dick Cheney died again. You're like, wow, that's great. All I can hope for,

and I mean this, I mean this as nicely as I can, if the worst woman on boat could go missing. Henry Zabrowski, God damn it. Just so that we can be interviewed. Oh, yeah. That is the only reason why. If we get interviewed,

I'm going to be like my mother-in-law and be like the crew was trying their best, y'all. I'm not even mad at home. But I also would love to do one of those. Her frown darkened a room. She hated to laugh. I don't want to tell you. That miserable bitch is actually happier being a corpse.

And we're all happier for. Look, you like, watch out for me, though, because right before we got on the boat, my husband goes, you looked so full of life today. And I go, what the fuck? No, no, no. No. Say I look empty-eyed and sullen.

Thank you. I go, did I light the room up too? Yeah, yeah. Please do not. You look pretty. I'll take it back. You look pretty. I'm no longer full of life now.

Guess who also doesn't get trafficked. This person. Yeah. Oh, no. Somewhere. Oh, too lazy to do it. I'm going to bum you out. Once we get the soup brothel going, I think there's a spot for you.

That's where you're going. The worst part about human trafficking is how long it takes, right? Beep, beep. Hell yeah. Come on, it's starting earlier every year. What is it? 3 p.m. Human driving is started. Sinisterhood.

Sinisterhood. Thank you. My choice. Thank you. Henry and I are going to be performing at 10 a.m. tomorrow. Yeah, it is. We are going to be day drinking for that one. So please enjoy that.

Sunglasses. Please bring your sunglasses It's going to be out After the bar crawl tonight It's going to be a hungover show So we're going to be doing our best Make sure you get your shit sucked out of your toilets And make a loud cheer

Because you're live on side stories Right now And sinisterhood Yeah Thank you Thank you Just for fun Let me get a Hail Satan

Hell Satan What time is our show? 9 a.m. 9 a.m. We'll see all. Thursday at 9 a.m. On Thursday. Are you doing, are you going to be drinking during yours?

Yeah, we'll be something during that. We're going to be, uh, we'll be on a lot of coffee and something else. But we're doing the Captain Phillips, and he got, he got taken by the pirates at like 7 a.m. So it's, I feel like we're all going to feel very empathetic. Or will we? I don't know. That guy might be a dumb ass. And if you guys are looking for writing heroin, I got some.

So. Come grab it. Hail Satan, everyone. Hellsating, everyone! Peace!