Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: Dongcopter

Episode Date: June 9, 2021

Ben 'n' Henry break down this week's true crime news: naked woman goes on a rampage at Outback Steakhouse, a dongcopter breaks up a mayoral campaign event, a couple catfishes serial killers, and MORE.Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0

There's no place to escape to. This is the last stop on the left side stories. That's when the cannibalism started. Side stories. Yeah. Kissel, I know that you're scared of your river trip. I have a river trip coming up and I'm absolutely horrified. Your assessment is correct. You're going to be on a river, but I also love- For three days! It's so funny. One of the movie deliverance? How does one be on a river without a boat for three days? I don't know, but number two- It's a tub. I love the physical advice you've been getting from our other fat friends that say stuff, and I'm just going to say Ed Larsen's advice, where he's just like, you just got to lift your

feet up and go with the river. Being like, do you know how much speed number one Kissel can will build up? Just being on the river. Bro, I don't want to talk about it. Because you will shoot. I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to be into a waterfall like a log, like the old big sodden, rock filled logs. Yes, absolutely. And also you have to remember to keep your feet up. At all times, you got to go turtle. I can't wait. I'm hanging out with two old high school friends I haven't seen in 20 years. One of them I haven't seen in 20 years. The other ones I see very rarely, but then it's all there are 15 other people and it's three days on a raft and everyone just tells me it's going to be chill, but as Henry and I were talking about

before the show, we're chill. They don't know what chill means. They don't know. We're podcasters. On that Hawaiian hike we took to the top of the volcano, they also said the word chill. And don't they understand that chill is the temperature of a corpse? Yeah, we'll get to that. I'm eliminating that word because people don't know what it means. No, they don't. Absolutely not. But I can't wait. I'm going to go explore the most beautiful place in the world, which I've heard is Boulder Junction, Colorado. It's going to be so nice to be terrified in all of these wonderful natural landscapes. We'll get to the show. This is side stories. I am Ben. I was talking with my friend, Josh, who set up the entire trip and I was like, you remember

how big I am, right? He's like, oh yeah, I guess I'm don't worry. I put you down as two people. And I was like, you know what? Yeah, kind of offensive. But you know what? It is what it is and thank you. By weight, you are a they. Absolutely. That is incredible. I can't wait to the next side stories when we hear what this was like because our next side stories will be after your trip. Would you go right into our live show at Red Rocks, our biggest live show we've ever done? That's great. We had 3200 people. Yeah, I'm really excited to see what you're at because honestly, the sympathy we'll get from you in a wheelchair might be really nice. This could be great. This is how we sell the show. This is it. That would be perfect. But the one

thing though is it ruins our silhouette because then you'll be the same height as me. Well, I don't think people will even give a shit. All right. Well, I'm very excited. And so at this side stories, we have a bunch of talking about and the next side stories are the Red Rock show will be completed and I can't wait to tell everyone about how that one person threw up on that other person and it started a whole wave of vomit. I can't wait to tell you. I just can't wait to see you covered in reeds. Oh my God. There's so much mud in your shoes. I am a masculine man in some ways. But those ways do not entail anything that is traditionally masculine. You like beef. That's the main way. I'm a man. I got a truck and I'm a man. But you're going to see

very quickly that I also have lower back pain and I'm going to need some lumbar support. You're going to need to wear something other than the track suit or like something like that because it's too soft and so drown. It'll be like if you throw puffing into the pool, there's no way he can get out. You need some kind of wetsuit. Don't worry, buddy. I'm stopping by Target later on today and I am going to get everything. Look out, Target. Watch out. I have to stay fully clothed because the sticks and the rocks and the sun. They're getting your butt and they're getting your pee hole. Well, speaking of not being fully clothed, man, this story out of Ocala, this is just classic. The world is opening up. It really is. We're finally, you can just feel life returning

to normal and the world is almost opening up like a blooming onion. And where do you get said blooming onion inside of a crazy woman's pants? This is that's only Courtney Love and that's called the blooming prune. This story takes place in an outback steakhouse in Ocala. This woman was absolutely hammered. And what do you do when you're hammered? You get all hot. You gotta get naked and be free, bro. I have like to take my shirt off when I'm sober more often than I even do when I'm intoxicated. That is true. This woman went all the way down to her toe pads. This is from Ocala. Of course it's from Ocala. This is, we'll start with this naked Ocala woman tased after destroying outback and a moho grill in what they call, I want to

say the police labeled this as a rampage. Because I don't know. I don't know. This woman is 53. Her name is Tina Kindred. She's 53 and actually, not to anything, but she's kind of cute. She's cute and she's very small, very tiny. So I'm just wondering, can she go on a rampage or all these officers are these officers being a little hyperbolic? Well, this is her name is Tina Kindred, 53 years fun. She stated that apparently she was topless and bottomless and there is video of it and she is behind the bar at Ocala. She can barely see over the top, which is kind of cute. It's kind of like a lunatunes cartoon where you just kind of see a flurry of activity just hands at the top of a brunette woman's head. It's very Tasmanian devil is now a bar back and he's doing

a horrible job. That's where I see the rampage part because the bottles are slinging out of the cops and they're like, ma'am, ma'am, please ma'am. And then she emerges from the side of the bar. We get the full frontal of her. She's going, she's literally making those types of cartoon noises. So hammered. She's mumbling. She might be hammered. I don't know what she's doing, but she is throwing bottles everywhere. And I think that's where you'd say the rampage is a lot of broken glass. Yeah, true. They taste the living shit out of her. They did. So Kindred lowered to the floor and the officer used one five second cycle with taser seven and Kindred put her arms behind her back and that was basically the end of the event. I want to put this to our

audience. Would you rather be tackled by the police or taste? What do you think is worse for you physically? Like would you rather have him like because we were talking about this for a lady of this size, if she gets tackled by a big broody cop, dude, she could break her. She could break a whole series of body parts. You could really hurt her. Right. So I think that in a way, even though it's not, maybe that's why in my mind we need net guns. I love the idea of a net gun. If you throw a net on her, right? That saves her that saves you. You could just cinch up the net. She tires herself fighting inside of the net. Sure. And then she goes to sleep. I think that's such a fantastic idea. It's about tiring them out. This woman, she wasn't on any narcotics, but she was

super stoned on THC evidently. So I think she had a couple of mojitos. Wait a second. We're playing. We're blaming weed for this. No, I don't think. I'm not blaming weed for what she did. I might blame weed for her entering an outback steakhouse to begin with. I mean, I because you just said the mood for a blooming onion. Exactly. Which by the way, everyone listening, breaking news folks, the blooming onion is actually the worst thing you can get at any restaurant. I think it has more calories and more fat than anything else. It's not that good. And it's they've lost touch. Even if you make the joke, I guess I'm eating my vegetables. It doesn't actually make it healthier. It doesn't. And honestly, I might even know this outback, you know, Kala. Have you been kicked out of

there too? Yeah, Kala's outback is losing some of it. I'm going to use the other name, some of its mojo when it comes to even serving sizes, because I think legally they were forced to make the blooming onion smaller because people were dying. Interesting. So Kindred, she said she chose the mojo grill because the owner, she felt was quote, not honest. And then the owner was like, yo, you can't come in here. He denied her business. And then she got super mad. So then she started turning over tables. So the question is, do you just be like, all right, man, come here, sit down, shut up. Here's your drink. Shut up. Or do you anger this Tasmanian devil of a middle aged woman? Is she pussy out by then? I think that her pussy

came out through all of the fun. Like when you're flipping over tables, what's that? You got to start taking off clothes. I mean, you know what I'm saying? You know, bras take a minute of a thought to take off. She did not go out with a bra. She was maybe not. This is five days of a bender. You're right. She hasn't seen a bra since 1983. I must be wrong. I must be wrong. But the idea of taking all your clothes off to me, because you have to sit and decide to do it unless you're in a fight, because you ever watch those like fights on YouTube or like titties pop out or whatever you're saying. It's like because they're going to slide over at all. Well, what are those? The wrestling pornos, right? But also the ones where they are just street fighting

and their boobies pop out of the shirts and stuff. That's just because of the chaos, right? And they're getting pulled on. They're getting dragged on where it seems like if you are completely nude, you stopped at some point during your, again, I'm going to use the term rampage. Sure. And you decided I better be naked for this. And you take off all your clothes, which I also think is a bad idea because then when you saw her get lifted up, she was all covered in blood because she had fallen down into a pile of broken glass and she had created it. So when it comes down to if you were going to go on your rampage, this is my tip for the audience. Okay, great. Think about this. Honestly, thicker clothes. Because you can't take off yourself. Don't let yourself get naked. I know

you're going to want to. Maybe that's why Trump wore his pants backwards. He was getting nude. He was just too much at Mar-a-Lago. He was looking back at better days. Officials also said she had a fentanyl patch. So I think she has a history and she needs to be doing better. We hope she gets the help she needs because obviously this is not a sober person committing anything, committing these crimes that she committed. And they're going to wake up and not be like super pleased. Yeah, she did throw us a bottle at an officer's head, but it only hit him in the arm and then left a bit of a booze on his shoulder, which I'm sure he happily licked up. I mean, honestly, we're not going to try to cover any more Casey Anthony fucking news on this show.

No, I'm so done with Casey, but I did watch the TikTok. Someone uploaded the TikTok, the cam footage of the cop and like her whole thing is like, I'm still damp. Yeah. But you know, it's so weird. We were just because somebody also, when it comes to being infamous, like the film Three Amigos, infamous, infamous, more than famous. But when it comes to being infamous, it's both a heyday and a hell day because Alex Jones was just recently snapped in the bathroom with his hands just talking in a shirt picture at a strip club. Literally, you just someone posted it to, I guess, Snapchat. This was like Alex Jones is in the same strip clubs. I'm in and he's fucking red face and hammered and it looks like he's jerking off.

But you know, he's just putting his shirt back in his pants, but it's still like your whole life is that you gave up to you gave yourself up to the hashtag savage community. Right. And now they're all looking at you at all times and looking for content. Also, can you imagine being at the strip club and then just look in and you're just like, what the fuck did Alex Jones is right? He's like, oh, ladies and gentlemen, can I see your bush hair? Ma'am, ma'am, ma'am, can I see your bush hairs, ma'am? Like how do you, I think you have to, I love strip clubs. I love exotic dancers. I think as a country, we need to be so much more sexually free and the body is a beautiful thing and all different shapes and sizes. But I think I would leave. It's hard because

it would be weird. He would bump, looking at him would bump me out. I wouldn't want to be where he's at because I know it's going to be a huge fucking scene wherever he goes. And the people that are attracted to that scene, it's not like, I don't know, maybe I'm just biased. This is 2010 internet bias, where back in the day, the scene that Alex Jones would cause, I would be happy to be a part of and looking and watching like, you know, when he took the raft into Bohemian Grove. Of course, classic Alex Jones. But nowadays you watch me like, I don't want to have anything to do with anybody who even wants to be like entertained by being in a 10 foot diameter of him. But you know, for a fact, people buy him shots. I'm sure there's a massive contingent.

Oh, trying to get him fucked up as possible. So he fucking wilds out. Exactly. And then he started, were you trafficked? Ma'am, have you been trafficked here? Like, I guarantee you that's what he's going to try to pull if he, I mean, who cares that he was at a strip club? No, that's the best part of him. That's the most relatable part is him at the strip club. But I could see him explain it away. Be like, I was just seeing if they're going to be trafficked. I just was just going to their undercover. It's like, okay, you could just trying to get your dick hard, man. That's cool. But also when it comes down to it, you know, you gave up the back. Now you it goes, you also called yourself a fucking performance artist. You did all of the

shit. So now you have to you're always the center of ridicule now, which is what you get for harassing all of the parents of the Sandy Hook. It's almost it's a joke with no punchline. Casey Anthony and Alex Jones walk into a bar. Great. That's it. Now I have to leave. And now I have to leave because it's about to get fucking weird as hell. Speaking of weird as hell, I'll also say quickly, the UFO report was dropped, buddy. I am okay. It was dropped. Well, it wasn't officially dropped for our perusal yet. But the the officers of the Pentagon went and they debrief the US government about what the report is and it Oh, drum roll. Oh, what is it? It's nothing. It's nothing. I this was, you know, obviously I followed the politics and stuff and there's always like the

big commission reports coming out and you wait two years. So you got to experience that first hand work. Yes, you were so excited. It reminds me of when I was growing up, this kid was like, dude, I'm going to get this thing called the claw, right? And I was like, this is going to be so cool. He just told me how cool the claw was. And he's like, bro, I got it. And I went over to his house and what it was was just something that you you just pull it. You pull the thing and it's got the hand claw thing at the end. And he amped it up so much for me that when I first saw it, I literally was just like, that's what you were so excited about. I was never friends with him again. But guess what you could do with the claw? You could pick things up. You can use it as a tool.

What can I do with this UFO report? Absolutely nothing. Smash bugs with it. I could definitely print it out and wipe my ass with it. I could, you know, absorb spills with it. Okay, but to be fair, as we were talking with Sina Ghazna view about this yesterday, watching the fake fight that was Mayweather at Logan Park. We were a part of the problem last night. You paid money. Well, you paid money. I paid money. I'm complicit. I fed the Tulpa. I apologize. Although the event itself, I do have to say was very fun to get everyone together and watch people beat each other's brains in was a great time. Other than the Mayweather Logan fight, which is like, knock this man out. But he didn't. Anyway, Sina was talking about how, and I think that this is

credible. It's nice that the government even acknowledges it. Sure. Because that's a baby step. Jillian Anderson at the web. That's what the U.S. government gave you. They wrote a tome about it. She didn't really. And that's when I met him. Short stout, funny, loud. Well, if I committed crimes, she would be able to describe me. You know what I mean? That's true. Just in that moment, the UFO report came out. Basically what they are saying is there is no evidence to point towards extraterrestrial life attached to whatever these orbs are, whatever the UAP is. But again, they're left like kind of a backdoor argument saying, but there's no evidence that it's not either. So it's they just came out and said nothing. They said we we got an eyeball on it,

which, part of it. Honestly, I kind of want to say thank you that the U.S. government didn't say it was aliens, because if they did, we'd all have to not believe it. And I would have to say this is a Psyop because it would be a Psyop if they did come out of it because there is no way. There's just no fucking way that the Pentagon is going to say even if a E.T. in a fucking saucer like old school landed on the White House lawn, which is what we've been talking about for forever, they would never acknowledge it because that information is going to be they need to take that information. They all need to hire a bunch of if they can steal them from any sort of sitcom writing room. Absolutely. And put them in a room and like have them all decide what it means because

the implications are going to be massive. There's still many people saying that it validates religion that it does because you also forget that half the Pentagon is evangelical Christian too. Oh, if not more. So they wouldn't want to admit it's real. Even worse, they might be Catholic. Catholic porn. That's what I'm calling conjuring three. I haven't seen it yet, but I'm calling it Catholic. What I learned from conjuring three is that I'm a nighttime satanist because they have daytime satanist and nighttime satanist. I'm a nighttime one. I'm like two different. Oh, yes, absolutely. And it's satanist only only what I love is our only aim is chaos and our nectar is to spare. Okay. And I do. I appreciate that. Sure. I mean, I think it's it seems it

seems fairly according to my family, I do create a lot of the nectar if it is indeed despair. That is absolutely disgusting. So the UFO report, the USO report, it came out and it was at the very least again, it was interesting that there was an acknowledgement. It took 70 years to get there, whatever it might be. So you wonder if they have aliens, if they're just going to slowly release that information because Harry Reid said a couple of weeks ago that they have a corpse. There was a guy that told a guy that there is maybe a corpse, more likely some sort of object, some sort of chunk of a ship that they have a dollop of a ship that they have somewhere that they're trying to figure out whether or not it is even extraterrestrial

what it means. I just think that they're not going to come forward. But the UFO community, I want to say congrats. We made it. This is what the disclosure looks like. We did it. We made it all the way through the process. Now things can go back to normal. We can go back to talking about tightly wound hairs wrapped around penises from alien women that we've been having sex with. We go back to what do the reptilians like tile floors or does it distract them because of their nails? Are they a carpeted species? We're back into George Norrie world. I love it. And of course, Harry Reid, he showed up with a black eye a few years ago and he said, I fell down the flight of stairs, but I do have some inside information.

A sex worker punched him in the face. That's what I've been told by someone very low down in the government. It's because he fucked too good and she couldn't stand that he wanted to leave. Well, you said it first, my friend. Speaking of crazy supernatural stuff, Henry, you saw this video of this weird ass creature walking over a bridge, right? Yes, I did. It's pretty freaking trippy. I don't know. I wish I could cut to a video of you on a bridge after you said that, but this is an audio. I hate you. And I'm just going to take this away from you. Don't even worry about it. It took place in Hasbrog, Jharkhand. No, Jharkhand. I don't know where that is.

I think that is in very, very East Ohio, meaning India. There is this story. This is now in Newsweek. Newsweek is trash, dude. You'd say it like that, man. It's out of the ties, which is also trash, but whatever. I remember it being like a real periodical, but I do like that they're covering it. It's fun. This is a strange white figure was walking on a bridge in eastern India. And this thing, it's fun. It's got a nice looking butt. If you watch this video, it saunter down the street. A bunch of guys in motor scooters are like watching it and honking at it, which they shouldn't. Well, I mean, I don't know what you're supposed to do when you see a naked entity walking. It might just be a very thin. It's got a Gwyneth Peltier like body,

but there's no hair. None. So there is something very unique about it. It's tornado conner. Maybe it's also officially retired. Wait, what? Yep. She just officially retired. Yep. Last week. She got out of the game, but she's been retired for quite a while. No, no, no, no, no. She was pivoting. Now she's retired. Okay. She never should have had her career ruined by tearing up a picture of the Pope. That's Lord Michael somehow still has that fucking octogenarian still has so much power. He's still such a freaking little bitch. Um, but nonetheless, she did have some massive mental health problems.

Perhaps she saw something like this. So 77,000 people saw this tweet by Ashutos. And then there's just a long number. And the video, they say, they say the video has become talk of the town. Talk of the town. People are assuming it to be an alien and it actually could be keenly observed the 13th second of the video, a red laproswing UFO flying with jangling sound placed near Hazarovak, chocolate. Nailed it. So it's cool, man. And there's an actual video. And no matter what is, I think Henry, you usually say this, no matter what it is, people stopped. They recognized that something was weird and trippy. I almost like the reactions of the people more than the entity itself, because it does like something was there,

something was fucking weird. And people were like, we're going to want to get that on camera. This was another sighting that would happen back in March. I guess it was according to the India's Ministry of Home Affairs. A 47 year old motorcyclist claimed that the sudden appearance of a UFO is what caused him to fall off his motorcycle. He said, guy was traveling home on my motorbike at about 9am when I witnessed a strange light. I tried to concentrate on riding, but what made me fall was the sound that followed after the light. I then fell off the bike due to panic. Oh, that's very sad. It gets very scary. That's where they get you. That's why you want to, that's why I don't trust the motorcycles. Not I trust motorcyclers. I think they're very brave

in many ways. Absolutely. I get spooked too easy. I jump. I get scared. And then I would immediately die. I can't, anytime I'm on the highway and I see someone on a motorcycle, and there's zippin' and zapping through traffic. I feel like a mother. I'm just like, you better watch out there, you hell, Zane. Joel, you got to check your mirrors. Yeah, please do, because it's just dangerous the way these motorcyclists drive sometimes. We covered an episode that we could have called a relax fit when we did and called the Goblin Universe last week. And again, it's important, these types of things walking down the street, yes. Might have been a person in a costume, sure. Might have been a person with some horrible skin disease that we're all looking at,

and then we all call them an alien, and it turns out it's going to scar them for the rest of life. Absolutely. I think that's more than possible. But I also think it's nice that certain things can happen in our general world that cause us to think that life might be more complicated than we think it is. And that's the control system, that weird person in a unisuit with the big butt. Isn't that something also just kind of tangentially related from my perspective is the drones. Oh, yeah, Doncopter. Let's do Doncopter. I'm just going to say one sentence because these drones are killing a bunch of stuff. There was also the thing in Orange County where a drone crashed and 3,000 elegant turns fled the reserve and they left all their eggs behind. So there's

2,000 eggs and none of them are viable because this drone scared all the birds away. The moms and the dads all left their kids. Okay, okay. Because you said, I read this right before, you said drone kills all birds. It scared the bird, parents away from the bird eggs. And then now the babies are all dead. These birds need to stick with their families. I'm going to go as far as to say, those birds were weak. They didn't know what a drone, they're birds, man. And then all of a sudden they're like, what the fuck is that? You protect your eggs. They already, so if you're a bird and you look at a drone, that's like a human looking at a fully automated human being. Cool. It's scary. But if I had an eggs I had to protect, I'd be protecting my eggs. If you sat on an egg with

that flat ass of yours, you would lose so many, you'd have to put them under your tummy. That's weird. I have two under my tits. I have two under my tits. I have one under my gut. I mean, honestly, but then I don't have a whole family of birds. Oh, father of the year. But these birds need to stick to your guns. I guess I think they were scared about this brand new technology they have never experienced in billions and billions of years. And that's why all those eggs are now just dead. And you can't even eat them because apparently they're all fertilized. It's just a bunch of muck in there. My question is you can't get the eggs, you can't pop them like in a egg oven or some shit. Whatever, man. I bet you, I'm sure there's some animal out there.

I'm sure there's some like Komodo dragon who was like, oh, this is like a buffet. I'm sure somebody's happy. Something in the animal world is thrilled that there's so many eggs. Honestly, I know that it might be not what people are used to, but you could probably give it to homeless people to eat. No, no, I don't. Is that wrong to say? Yeah, because I don't think it's food at this point. But you could cook it up. It's fully fertilized. The eggs of birds we don't eat. But they do in Vietnam. You could get certain, like you get that delicacy where you get the egg and you eat the fertilized like a little creature. And sometimes it's a snake. You can do that thing. People eat those. Yeah. It's like apparently it's a delicacy there. It's like it gives you strength and power.

White people eat those on camera for clicks. Yes. That's what no one eats that. They might. It's like when I went to that one place, which I love Night Market in LA. I absolutely love that restaurant. And then you go. And I think I've told the story before. They have a very like, they're like, this is, you know, classic. This is from the home country. It's a rare thing. We serve it here. It's a water bug salsa. Like it's water bugs that like palmetto bugs that they grind up and they eat and they're like, oh, we all love this in our home country. I think it's from Thailand. I'm not quite certain. And then I, you know, you eat it. And I was like, it still tastes like bugs. You know what I mean? And then you think it's just a prank on white people.

It might be. It might be. I still believe the same with Vegemite. I think it's a prank on any non Australian. But then when we went there, they do exist. They do eat it. Yeah. Well, Henry, you mentioned speaking of drone news and politics. There's this mayoral candidate who was who was heck. This is what drones need to be used for. I love this story. I know I come out against the drone often, but this was an actual use of a drone in a positive, productive way. So this was, it's a New Mexico sheriff. He's trying to become mayor of Albuquerque. Apparently no one likes this guy, right? I guess he's Manuel Gonzalez. And he was doing a some kind of speech somewhere to blah, blah, blah. I wasn't listening to any fucking thing he was saying because what hovered

into the picture was a dildo attached to this drone that kind of drifted right in front of him. And you just hear one person in the back here. Is that a dog and a drone? Which is incredible. They're all jumping and you see the security officers jumping to get it, right? And so the drone keeps bouncing out of their reach while they're all like, and obviously it's this huge fucking deal because and then they threw all of those guys into jail. Well, they have branded this the Doncopter and evidently this is the second time the Doncopter has harassed this New Mexico politician. He dared to call them political operatives. Yeah. They are real Roger Stone acolytes. I mean, he did love dildos, but for different reasons and still does do this day.

So they even have a Twitter account for the Doncopter. And I just feel like, as you mentioned, the good Alex Jones or when Alex Jones at the very least was attempting to perhaps, if he had any good will in his heart, perhaps it was Bohemian Grove. Sure. I feel like this is one of the best ways to heckle a shitty politician is to bring light to how comical all of this bullshit is absolutely nothing better than seeing him have to try to tackle a drone with a dildo on it. You can see just how ineffective physically somebody that you might be scared of. I think that's really important, especially for these politicians. You forget these fucking no-budded pieces of fucking shit don't do anything all day. They sit in a chair, right? And so we are all

supposed to be so scared of these people. And then watching them jump after a dildo, flying six inches from their hands really shows how ineffective they are as human beings. Yeah. And I don't know too much about the actual politics here. Evidently, the dude is a Democrat who is talking to 70 people at the Rebel Entertainment Center, which I think that's where all political speeches should take place at entertainment centers, because much like, again, the Mayweather and Logan Paul fight, most of it is just a work full of lies. I really do want to see every single politician that wants to be anything should have to wear like a pig costume once and go on camera and say, I'm a piggy for America, piggy for America, I eat the slop, I eat the slop. I need to see you be

embarrassed. That's that episode of Black Mirror where they make the guy with the bulk of pig on a bridge. That was the best episode of the entire series. And it was the whole time I was rooting for the pig. I was like, get him. I was rooting for the man to have to fuck a pig on camera. That was great, dude. What was he confused? He was a, he was a pedophile or something, right? They're like, fuck this pig. No, it was a, it was opposite. It was that they held his daughter ransom. Oh, so he was actually innocent. He had you. Well, it was something that I don't think anybody's innocent that runs for office. So the person who did this, uh, apparently it was a 20 year old Kailin Ashby Dreyer, uh, tried to get the drone back, but they didn't give it back.

And then a scuffle ensued and then Dreyer threw a punch at the sheriff. Well, well, yeah, he punched him in the arm. Yeah. Well, we're repeating well, reportedly yelling, he's a tyrant. Except for Taranis. Man, that's so 2021, just like going back to Abraham Lincoln's assassination with a fucking double-dunk dildo attached to a drone flying around. I need to see that libertarian flag, but instead of a snake cut up, just a dildo chopped up. So anyway, great. Uh, I don't think it should have been illegal to fly a dildo drone at a, at a mayoral candidate. What is the crime? I think it's probably like threatening a public figure with what? Dildo with a drone on it. It doesn't do anything to you. Drones just killed a bunch of birds and they're killing people.

They killed those birds inadvertently. Those birds were scared and then ran away. And guess what? Because they didn't understand in America these colors to ruin. No, they don't. They aggressively blow you up. All right. This is the story of the day. I'm very excited for this story. Uh, you know, the idea of people looking for murder bilia, right? The idea of people obsessed with writing serial killers and creating sort of parasocial relationships on their own with serial killers. Yeah. And what are your, what are your thoughts on murder bilia? Because I know you do have a few pieces. I do. It's a, it's a, it's a little bit of a gray area because you also don't

want to be like, cool. Ramirez touched this because it's like, fuck that motherfucker. But then also there's a history aspect to it. Yes. It's, I think that you can hold those two thoughts in your mind and know that I have some tasteless objects and a part of it is because it's a part of infamous history and I do have it. But you know, a part of the, it's also, so I'm glad that they can't profit off it. They shouldn't be making jack shit. Right. Like it should just be for our amusement, not for them. Like they are now, they are out of the game. So as far as I'm concerned, as long as they don't make a dime, who fucking gives a shit. And hopefully the money is donated to two groups that, that help victims. And now that's more

often than not. Yeah. Um, but this is the story of, this is really, really interesting. So weird. This is a couple that had a dark hobby. This is according to New York Post, uh, where they would seduce serial killers by mail. Yeah. And it's pretty fantastic. They are, of course, flipping it to a podcast. So we will begin to hear some of this stuff come out. Um, this is the story of Barbara and Richie Dijkstein. I'm gonna go Dijkstein on that one. I love it. I'm very, very happy with them. But they created the, apparently they had relationships with at least 100 of these, 100 serial killers. Jesus. John Wayne Gacy, Jeffrey Dahmer, Richard Ramirez, David Berkowitz, Charles Manson, Shaw Cross, Eddie Kemper, Bumblebutt,

Carl V. Tucker, um, which was one of their favorite. And they created these sort of, they catfished them by writing in to what they configured would be the type of person they would be most attracted to, including with pictures, uh, and the way that they structured their letters. And they may they serial killers fall in love with them in a way that is fantastic because there is some footage from that. We have some of the letters that they wrote and they really did like fool these men. Well, and let's get to some of those letters. And as far as, I mean, they went as far as, you know, faking sexual orientation. So in the case of Richie Dijkstein, uh, he first met up in tooth. He, um, he was the one who had to go and approach

uh, uh, Gacy and Dahmer because obviously those were two gay men. Yes. So he wrote all of his tomes, all of his letters. Uh, he talked about how, you know, he was into them sexually and David Berkowitz and him created sort of a relationship as well. They actually developed a weird friendship because of it. And Dahmer actually asked Richie in a letter to, uh, to quote, he wanted to see every unclothed muscular inch of you. Yeah, dude. This is a lot of this. And there's a lot of hot stuff happening there. Barbara got really close with Carla Faye Tucker. And she said, can we say Barbara? She's kind of a gilf. Oh sure. Sure. But she is, she's a, an interesting lady. But this is, so I'll first read, they got the night stalker to fill out a,

first of all, he said this, like one of these weird fucking things he always says, right? I used to go downtown LA to take pictures. There was a place where I'd go under the street. It was in a stop lane. I'd be able to look up the women's dresses as they would wait for the walk sign to change. And I take pictures. This is a letter that he wrote back to them. Yes. You'd be surprised how many people walk around with no panties. You see Madonna at the MTV Awards. I was with Sean Penn at the LA County jail. He was in jail for 30 days or punching out a camera. She came to visit him and I saw her. She's tiny. Something about Hillary Clinton that I did. Her calves and ankles are definitely healthy. This is the kind of shit he says. Richard Ramirez

is janking it to Hillary Clinton while in prison. Oh yes. Oh my God. Now I, why do we do this? What do we even do with her lives? Perfect woman or man? Superman. Wonder woman. Childhood heroes. Jack the Ripper. Frankenstein. Oh, you are so emo, Ramirez. Well, they don't like about people. A lot of things. Biggest fear. None. Friends like me because who needs friends. Oh my God. He's such a douchebag. He also said his favorite movie is Unforgiven. Yeah, dude. Honestly, that's a good one if you're going to choose one. Although he did get the favorite number naturally. Yeah, six, six, six. He has to stay on brand. Evil. Okay, dude. But you know, it's so funny because they do have so many detailed letters here and actually, you know, obviously making fun

of the fact they're going to have a podcast, but I think they did create a lot of content so good for them. Absolutely. And this is a story that then he goes to John Wayne Gacy. John Wayne Gacy is immediately, because one thing I've noticed too, especially since the Peacock docu-series about John Wayne Gacy, you realize J.W.G. He had a hard time making friends and he had a hard time keeping friends. He was a bit of a needy friend. He kept on killing all of them and putting them in this crawl space. But he got mad because the guy wouldn't send him any pictures. He kept saying, you know, you're not going to send any of these photos that you promised, huh? And then what he did is he tried to like get him going on like the guy that was writing to him, Dickie, uh,

Dick Stain, Ricky Dick Stain, was telling him, hey, you know, like, I'm going to send you pictures. I'm going to come visit you. I can't wait to suck your fucking dick. And then he sent him this, these pictures. I guess they must be pornography pictures of this character called Richard the Catcher. Right? And this is what John Wayne Gacy said back. I like the sticker of Richard the Catcher. But knowing me, I'd let you pitch every once in a while too. Just like going to school again, you do it over and over until you get it right. Just like with that head over head. So you get it all to the last drop. But you're getting good at it now. So now all you have to do is catch the whole thing without losing a drop. Okay, be good. Stay out of trouble. Look forward to seeing

some nice hunk photo shots when you get a chance to it. Oh man, there's something so Midwest about it. And then Jeffrey Dahmer responded, dear Richard, oh, hello, how are you today? I just received your letter this afternoon and I thought I'd write back. It's always nice to get mail from someone new. And then he says, and then he says, I don't respond to a lot. I don't know who to respond to all the time. It's difficult to know. In your next letter, please send me some really good photos to help me make your letter stand out from the crowd. That's what he does. It's like old school. It's like prison. He said, you said that you're a bodybuilder. That's good. I'd like to see every inch of your enclosed muscular interview. I'm allowed to keep any type of photo

except Polaroids. So don't take the pictures with Polaroid camera. Okay. There's something so human about it as well as this. We're talking about a cannibal and a man who raped and murdered 30 children. Absolutely. It's so weird to have this kind of almost mundane interaction with them. Oh, it is interesting. The pen pal relationship is something else because it's safe, right? Because you also don't have to go see them. Right. So you don't have to go through the rigmarole of going through the prison system just to see somebody, especially a high level prisoner like that. That must take an hour, hours. Oh, absolutely. Yeah. But this is also they said the one relationship they had a hard time keeping up with was old Charles Manson. Oh, why was he a little scatterbrained?

They said that he's quote unquote certifiable and that he was difficult to understand what he said in his letters and here's an example. Hey, Richard, it's always good to hear from you, buddy. I've been here a few years working on the whole again. Oh, well, when the others tell on me and make up stories, they want to believe because it adds to their job importance, right? So I got to go over the same old same old so it can turn the circle in the chains of command. I know you've been used by some people who called me brother and one day maybe we'll catch up. You and I are still solid as far as I'm concerned. I did ask a good friend to help me and I explained we'll be in contact easy Charles Manson PS. If I could get out, could you maybe get me a job as a bouncer?

Is that a real PS? Yes, that is. So Charles was just sitting in a cell by get out. I think I'm going to go into this bouncer world because you know how it is when you're five foot four. Everybody scared you. They truly are though. I big bouncers are just for show. If you see a little bouncer, very scary, very scary. Well, those are the Krav Maga black belt. Exactly. Those are the ones where it's like, how'd you get me on the ground, man? What the fuck, dude? All right. So that's fascinating. And actually, I would love to talk with that couple. I would love to hear the more about their story. But it is wild because again, is it exploitive of these men? Yes. But guess what? Do they deserve every fucking second of it? Absolutely. And it's also a break from the

mundanity. How mundane prison is. At least you get a letter from someone. Absolutely. And if you send them a couple of fucking big hung like Beach Boys, they'll still jerk off to it. It doesn't matter if it's real or not. You're helping them. You're weirdly helping them fulfill a fantasy that they weren't getting fulfilled. So you in a way, every single time you make Jeffrey Dahmer calm, I think that you're allowed to steal from him as well. Absolutely. All right. Well, think about that. You made Jeffrey Dahmer calm. Everybody else that made Jeffrey Dahmer calm ended up in his fucking refrigerator. Exactly. And I guess that's that's the interesting thing. I would love to know it's so it's called giving the rub, right? When when someone is super successful and they

put somebody else over. Sure. Like when if you're if you're a megastar and then you say like, if Will Ferrell was like, Henry, you're going to be my number one guy in this next movie. He gave you the rub. He's putting you over. That's a massive thing. And, you know, people get the power. They get that power vibe. I just wonder if they also did it. The couple, if they did it for power, of course, because it's a weird, but you get to be like a fucking super predator. What a weird like power to even harness a little bit of. I don't want the I don't want any of the Dahmer power. You have his ear. He thinks he literally is being like he's rolling on his belly for you. He's showing you his underside. I don't want to see him rolling on his belly. That's not good.

I'm just very quickly scumbag of the week, which is in the segment, but I'm just going to call it here. There's this Make-A-Wish CEO in Iowa, Jennifer Woodley. She embezzled $41,000 and she can just go. She's a bad person. Yeah, that does sound like dumb. And I tell them, just don't do that, please. If you're going to do Make-A-Wish, if you're going to run a charity, please God, we have it's just so difficult for people to have faith in anything. Yes. And you do have to treat those jobs with a high amount of of morality. You have to have high scruples. Yes, you do. Even as you see money going in one way, it's like it doesn't mean that you can take it because there's a bunch of kids because it is the idea of that's just the lowest of the

low when it comes down to it because you are just trying to take care of kids. And there's just so many other ways to steal money. Like just don't tax fraud. Sure. There's so many ways. Any other, but besides taking money from the children, don't take money from the children. All right. Well, my last little tale here, this is just super, before I get to here of the week, this is just super sad and disgusting. So I don't even really know what to say about it. But a dude back in the day, this is 10 years ago. So he's got killed his, his killed his wife, but it was Christmas time. Sure. You know, cause that's when you, that's apparently that's what you do. Christmas time is a high stress point. I guess it is. Especially if you're not making a lot of money, you're got to

keep up with the Joneses. You're sitting here. Everybody else is getting all the shit. Like, mommy, mommy, I want the ghost was just by a house. And then you go, your father's got to go out and he's got to do whatever he is. He's got to go and arrest Val Kilmer. Sure. Absolutely. I don't think Christmas was going to be that bad because there was gifts. There was two children involved. And the problem is the man propped up his dead wife during Christmas and the kids opened gifts in front of her. You're trying not to ruin the day. I guess. And then one of the daughters who is now, who is now 18, I believe she was eight when all this happened. She was like, she remembers her mother's being, her mother being cold. And then the daddy said,

mommy got drunk and ruined Christmas. And I just have a feeling that this man is more, I think that he's the one who ruined it. Because he killed my mom. And so anyway, that's just more of a, just don't fuck, you fuck up your kids that bad. You already killed their mom. And then you're going to, you're going to create that memory for them. And then it's going to ruin a massive holiday that just comes by once a year. I don't think he was thinking about it. I think that he was just laughing at Christmas vacation. You know what I mean? And then you just get so sucked into the movie, you just forget, you really go, oh, I got to get rid of this body. I don't have time. I want to see the part where he, I got to get to him saying, there's shedder's bowl.

So you got to prop her up. I don't think it seems like there was a massive domestic violence that was happening for years and years and years. It does seem like, or you had that big breakfast, it's Christmas morning. We do a big breakfast casserole. Sure. I can make you a mobile for several hours. Yeah, I don't think that was the case there. So anyway, this guy is looking at some significant time and ender rightfully so because the woman that he killed, you see the picture, there's a beautiful woman. She is really beautiful. That's, honestly, it's an incredibly sad story, and it's a pummer that you brought it up. And it really is. What are you going to do? Hey, it's not Christmas yet. Make sure that both of your parents are alive this Christmas before

you start opening gifts. You got to touch them. You got to, you got to really shake them. You got to really, really shake them. Yeah, absolutely. All right. Are we going to do here over the week? You have to. Okay, we have to. All right, this week's hero of the week. It's going to be a seven-year-old boy. I feel like I've been, oh my, I was going to say a horrible sentence. Oh, I've been doing a lot of boys lately, but no, I feel like there has been a lot of children in the hero category, but it's a seven-year-old. His name is Chase Poust, his sister. She's four years old. She got stuck in a riptide. She was wearing a life jacket, but she was getting all scared and stuff. And he swam for an hour to help her, to help his dad and sister who were

swept away. So the seven-year-old, he's a real hero. And I love that. He said, the current was so strong that my sister, she usually hangs out of the back of the boat. And she just let go and I let go of the boat and grabbed her. And then I was stuck. And then it took a seven-year-old boy to save them. That's so nice. Good for the boy. Good for the boy. He saved his father. And then speaking of Christmas, you can milk that for the next 20 years. Absolutely. You get that PS5. You get whatever value you want. Not only are we getting PS5, we're not waiting. You're going to get it from a scalper. Parents. Absolutely. Get it? The kid saved your fucking life.

Get him a PS5. Yep. So they got a bunch of resources out there. Saved all three of them at that point. Also, there's a lot of anti-scooter talk this week too. There was a lot of anti-scooter chatter in our emails this week. They're commiserating with me saying that we're anti-scooter. I'm not anti-scooter. I'm anti-littering scooters. Same way I'm not anti-soda. Don't just throw the can on the sidewalk, though. And also, these scooters are going too fast. Do any gas pumps work in this country? I have a lot to say. There's a lot that was just in that little topic. Well, good for that little boy. I'm glad. And now that child can live to be murdered by capitalism. So let's listen to some listenereens.

You can make a bunch of money like, again, Logan Paul. I mean, honestly. All right. This is the story of alien abduction. In 2011, my parents began to complain that every night I was either screaming at the top of my lungs in my sleep, sleepwalking around the house, or a combination of both. I began seeing therapy. Honestly, the combination is horrible. I'm so scared. I'd be like, honey, I think there's something wrong with our son. Yeah, I know. I think he's got the screemies. Oh, no. I began to see therapy because my parents maybe thought I had some type of deep trauma

that was being forced out of all I slept via nightmares. Absolutely. I'm very good on your parents. At this point, I started having vivid dreams where I was being abducted night after night. Every night I would fall asleep in a dream of bright lights and tall grayish white figures. One night, the dream was so vivid that I was pulled out of bed by my feet, ripping my sheets off in the process only to take a swing at one of the figures and waking to find that the figure was actually my dad trying to wake me from one of my fits. Other strange activities included sleepwalking into other bedrooms in the middle of the night and collecting as many books as possible. Weird. I don't know what my subconscious wanted to do with Jody P. Colt, but okay. Okay. To take

along to make a long story short, I eventually started developing a mole behind my ear that was very painful. The doctors looked at it and were confused because they couldn't figure out what would cause it. Then came the burns. After bad nights, I would wake up with burns in geometric patterns, usually perfect triangles. I got very concerned and made an appointment to be hypnotized to see maybe if I could get some answers. The night before the appointment, I had a bad night. At the time, I drove a 2000 Mercury Grand Marquis that did not have power locks and only had one key. I put the key on my bedside table and fell asleep. I had an abduction dream and then I woke up. I was sitting in the front seat of my car butt naked two miles from my house. My key was still

on my bedside table. What? The mole behind my ear was completely gone and there was a triangle burn on my right arm. Since then, I've not had any bad dreams leading me to believe that they were done with me at least for now. I still wake up some nights at the exact same time of 3.28 a.m. and when I use the bathroom, I can always hear an owl cry leading to believe they might still be watching. And the very last kicker to all of this is that I live in Middleborough, which is directly in the center of the Bridgewater Triangle. Wow. That is very interesting. Cool. Thank you for that story. That's fascinating. But this is also one of those sad stories. I didn't have pictures of the mole and the burns in my last phone, but that phone fell out of my pocket while I was riding a rollercoaster

in Six Flags. It happens to the best of us. It happens to the best of us. But this is very, very interesting. Obviously, people who have experienced these sorts of abduction scenarios, they are a lot of times traumatized and they don't know where it comes from. And then we also, during our series, ghost aliens are molested. We wonder whether or not, and it still holds up, whether or not aliens are a filter for trauma. Like you see these things while you're getting your dick sucked. You don't know what's going on. Your parents are so intimately involved, trying to figure out what's your trauma. Yeah. Then, you know, at least it didn't come from that layer. No, I just don't know how we haven't sold a show with these great segment ideas.

I don't know these great segment ideas. All right, here's another story. This is in regards to Dinosaur Ghosts. We talked about this last week for Goblin Universe. In 2014, I worked and lived on site at a wolf refuge in southern Colorado. It was way up in the mountains in the middle of nowhere. I was part of a small staff that took care of 36 rescued wolves and wolf dog hybrids. Oh, fucking metal. Cool. Most of the animals had come from sketchy craigslist breeders, shitty roadside zoos, the movie industry, and people who mistakenly thought that a wolf might make a good pet. Once wolves start to view humans as a source of food, they can never be released back into the wild. Our goal was just to give them a good home.

Think Joe Exotics Animal Park, but way less fucked up. Okay. There was a very strong hippy vibe at the refuge. All sorts of gurus and mystics turned up hoping to bask in that sweet, sweet wolf spirit energy. One day, this Reiki master lady from Boulder, Colorado, showed up. She was about four feet tall and dressed in flowing white clothing. She struck me as a self-righteous and super annoying, but everybody else seemed to be smitten by her. Still, it seemed somehow my duty to show her around the place. She and I were walking past one of the wolf enclosures when she came to a dead stop. She pointed at one of the wolves that was watching us warily from the trees. What's that wolf's name? The Reiki lady asked. It was Raven. She was

a beautiful old gray wolf. The woman asked me if Raven had been behaving weirdly in any way lately. She had as a matter of fact. I had mentioned it that she'd been slow to come down to her food, which was odd. People don't say wolf and it down for nothing after all. She'd also been getting along with the other wolves that she had lived with, but it wasn't like her at all. I think I thought that might be the case. The Reiki lady said she proceeded to close her eyes and hold her hands out towards Raven. Raven seemed to be even less interested in this weird hippy than I was. After a few minutes, the Reiki lady put her arms back down. She should be better now, she said. Why? What did you do? Oh, nothing. The lady said, struggling. She had a pterodactyl

spirit attached to her head. I got rid of it. And she said, I just rolled my eyes right out of my head, but I'll be damned if Raven didn't start acting normal again. Oh, she had a pterodactyl soul attached to her. Of course. Of course, man. Oh my God, who needs medicine? That's why every day I wake up and I remember, live your life. Yes. You got to bang those pods. Get those pterodactyls off your fucking head, bro. Because if not, you have got to. I could go for some dinosaur energy. Grow to love the pterodactyls attaching your soul. There's a pterosaur. There's a stegosaurus raping my grandmother right now in heaven. That's got to be huge for her. But that's why you also just sometimes you got to laugh because it's so hard to because, you know, with the thing about

these velociraptors, when they hunt the hunting packs, they don't come from the front. No, they come from the side. And they eviscerate you with one long claw. You just got to laugh at it. You are such a scientist, a biologist, perhaps. You know me. You know me. All right, everyone. What a fucking expert I am. Thank you all so much for listening. We can't wait to see you at Red Rocks. We cannot. We're going to have so much fun. And yeah, I want to give a shout out to my friends who made Sam and Maddie make a zombie movie. Oh, they are about two cool young dudes down syndrome. Yes. Wanted to write a zombie movie. They made a big gulf on me about it in the documentary. It is now on Apple Movies. You can rent it. And it is really just one of those incredible stories

about a human spirit and how the healing power of movies and how everybody just wants to make a fun zombie movie. It's great. You almost sound like your heart grew a few sizes. Fuck you. Yeah, that's very nice. Madeline Brumby and Shane Morton that worked on your pretty face is going to hell. They did all of the makeup effects for it. And it's great. Awesome. And as you know, we're doing stuff with the last prisoner project now. So I had a chance to interview a fellow named Dante West. That'll be on this week's Top At. It's fascinating story. He did three years for a pound of weed. And so we just talk about, you know, all those things that matter. And of course, we make fun of a bunch of people as well. That's the best part is that you can do both.

You can do both. All right, everyone. Hope you're doing well out there staying happy, healthy and safe. Hail yourselves. Magustalations you say. Hail Satan. And now you're dying. All right. I have adult onset asthma. I don't know. I'm better now. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors, you can support our shows by supporting them. For more shows like the one you just listened to, go to lastpodcastnetwork.com.