Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: Grim Sleeper, Chicken Lover

Episode Date: April 1, 2020

Ben 'n' Henry break down this week's true crime news: another Joe Exotic update, the Grim Sleeper is no more, a man does something unseemly with a chicken, and MORE.

There's no place to escape to. This is the last time on the left side stories That's when the cannibalism started You approach Gal Gadot you say to Gal Gadot Hey, will you sing the song into your phone right like will this help the ugly ones? Yeah, and since it's of course gal. They need you gal. They need you out there. They need you drumming up morale gal I'm going to make it through the plague without you gal. Oh my god gal. You gained three pounds You're out. Whoa. That's the fickle world of helping Hollywood. Hey everyone. Welcome to side stories I am Ben Kissel hanging out with Henry Zabrowski. We're kind of hanging out every day

You know, we're stuck inside sure we're doing our things. We're living our life We're living our best version of our life that we can legally live right now every day celebrities They have now come into our phone Henry and they are come into my phone They come into my home and I don't ask them to come into my home. No, they just arrive They arrive on the Instagram. They arrive in various things. I don't know how I opened up my bank account the other day And know who's in there who Harry Shearer. What was that? What was Harry Shearer doing in there? He was singing. I want to say wheels go round and round I think it's for Mary Poppins some song for Mary Poppins

It was just in a British accent. I was like get out of my bank account Here's Shearer and he's just like things are getting low and I was like I am trying to move I don't need you telling me how broke I'm becoming because I'm constantly ordering barbecue That's fine. That's what we're supposed to be doing. I will say my my you know, what's interesting right now Nothing absolutely nothing is interesting our lives ever completely static great Oh, we're doing sitting and watching television Desperate for material trying to figure shit out right trying, you know, we want to we want to make people make the people smile Sure, you know, I guess my main thing is man. I'm shopping for a toilet

You're shopping for a toilet right now. Do you think that this is the best time to shop for a toilet also? Do you desperately need a toilet enough to buy one during a pandemic? We're going we're we're moving soon. Uh-huh, and I have an opportunity a golden opportunity To start my bathroom experience again from the bottom up Yes, we have toilets already in the bathrooms We have a toilet in the bathroom where we're gonna move Toilet if you if you would yeah, anything toilet a floor can be a functioning toilet Yes, if you're in solitary confinement. Yeah, yes, and you can do toe your dukes down into the drain

Yes, you have to pretend like you're a college kid in a college kid in the shower Well hungover or yeah Ben kissle in his apartment in New York when he shat in the shower I didn't shit in the shower. Okay. Well, I'm very happy that round table is being rediscovered You can listen to the mystery pooper episode of the round table and also Henry You're the only one who has confirmed confessed to the crime I understand that was a little bit of a lark, but you're the only one to say that you did it It was a bit. Okay. All right I knew and legally if you say it's a bit then you can't be charged for crimes

Well, that's even especially if you do something like you kill like you kill a man, right? And then your body's in your home But you happen to have a pizza that have much like olives and peppers on it if you put olives and peppers on its face Like a smiley face and it's a bit then it's a bit. Well, perhaps that's what Carol Baskin did to her husband We'll get into that in a little bit because the Joe exotic tale continues to unravel as As the documentary continues to ripple across not just America, dare I say the world So we're going across the thighs and the bellies When it comes to your toilet, do you want to get a toilet that your feet don't that your feet can dangle on?

Because I feel like you would do really well with just a toilet that you have to like hop up on Huh, and then you know, I was joking about this last night. They have so many options There's so many different options for how much get a gallon shit you want to put in there, right? Okay, so what are you? What are the kind of options because I haven't watched home improvement like a tool time in a long time Have they come up with the lazy boy reclining toilet yet? No, they were not there yet The Japanese are very close. Damn it. They're very very close in this plague has only put Obstacles between us and the peaks of toilet technology. Okay, I look at some super expensive toilets just to look at them

I saw a toilet for three thousand dollars for three thousand dollars. It looks a nice It is it looks really really nice, and it's got an air deodorizer and it shoots It seems to be I think pressurized Neutralized air what I've been to your fucking asshole This is true, and it neutralizes your farts before going in like what we did to Saddam Hussein It goes up into your asshole, and it can literally It like is a antidote to the parts. I might be lying I'm not really certain, but it says something about this you got all these little buttons and knobs in the center of it

There's one that sucks your dick. There's one that does your taxes as far as I'm concerned it better it for three dollars Oh my god for three thousand dollars. I'm just this is a commode. This is a thing where you excavate human waste I think three grand is too much. I Would not pay more than a hundred and fifty bucks. Give me a ten gallon bucket I cannot imagine three grand on a dump in toilet I just need a bidet which I want to bidet now because of this teepee thing because Obviously everybody's dealing with this. There's some of us, and I'm gonna put out there There's a lot of people up to suffer from dog bottom dog bottom

Where you have so many little hairs like like long-lost family members around your butt hole and they are they they want to keep The poops in they want to keep them in because they're like their family But they go out anyway, don't they they do because if you love something you gotta let it go and then it's cut They're smeared with it. So what I need is the blast hose, but you need one that can connect to possibly to a Warm water cycle versus and then just the tushy mechanism because now there's just the tushy magazine mechanism Which I'm fine with right because my butthole could actually probably use with a splash of cold water now and then to refresh I think a splash of cold water kind of like what Tony Robbins used to do He has that sort of like cold water cube that he jumps in and out of it gives him energy

Yeah, well, of course it naturally would it's absolutely frickin freezing your body is gonna react to it But when it comes to your dog butt first of all, I think that's a great term for a hairy butthole a hairy Polish man's butthole specifically Puffin Wendy and I'm sure Marcus's dog Georgie goes through dog butt Situations all the time, of course because they're dogs. They don't have to clean their own, but we have to clean their butt for them Yes, it's just difficult when you are also The one who is getting the dog, but that's double dog button one house I agree. Is it possible to get one of these toilets? Maybe get a little trimmer a trimmer attachment Where they cut the hairs now do you want to trust a machine to do that or is that how they take over through the butthole?

I don't know I'm not giving them that level of trust Okay, yet. All right They have to be able to handle a couple of things first like taking random information from my Gmail of putting into my calendar because I Don't keep a calendar because I forget to put the dates in the calendar from the emails when they're sent If they could do that that will be fine But they don't do that yet, but I actually I tell you what to keep things fresh in our home. Yeah, I'm not shaving my beard I'm trying to see how long and get my beard to go. I'm going Jack black with it Okay, but it did give a shaver or needed my nuts to keep things romantic

Well, I think that is just absolutely wonderful You got to shave those nuts. Let the ladies know what they're dealing with But if you got a good toilet at home, please reach out tell me what the brands are because I was looking at seats Yeah, exactly the cause of the toilet cost three thousand dollars. I want to be able to shift it into drive and My bathroom with it. That is the only way $3,000 is a Jumping I can see I mean honestly, I believe me I wanted to take my butt more seriously and I think we all should sure because now especially think about how valuable your butt is

Right fucking now every day. You're sitting on it. You're telecommuting sitting on it I'm I try to stand a lot of times most of the time I end up I'm like working I say I'm working I'm working from home and I slide into a position where I'm completely horizontal and my The laptop is just supported by my tits, right, right And it is a perfect support and then it's also kind of nice because you know how when people are at their laptop computer or desktop Computer rather they have the mouse and then oftentimes they'll get those little gel pads for their wrists But for Henry and I we can just use our own tip. Yeah, you can use your own boob and then I use my softer than gel The meat above my nipple is perfect to protect me from carpal and I've been using it

But honestly if I have to start using carpal gloves, I'm gonna lose all respect for my family. I Know that I know that I will even though. Yes, you know, you know, I know you should be able to take care of yourself You know showing weakness is actually sign of vulnerability vulnerability is strength But up to a point if you can't type without injuring yourself just within your own home just from this brief window of time Yep, I feel like the COVID's just gonna find you I think COVID's just gonna find you and it's gonna come in your own like I'm like a big Nude man and it's just gonna tear apart your family and we do have a story about a nude man throwing sausages at someone coming up Here I later on in the episode. I did have a situation

I was playing Division 2 because they have the expansion pack where you get to go to New York, although it doesn't look like New York at all There's not one bagel shop. There's no pizza involved. There's no like the skyline New York skyline No, I know I was a little bit like this is not the New York that I know in love But my thumb was starting to hurt and I did wow Earth um and it was the weakest I've ever felt in my life and I said no six foot seven 300-pound man looking up gamer thumb. I was like do I have gamer thumb and then as I was looking it up I said I'm not I am going to bully myself and I bullied myself as Eminem talks about in his song

Rap God and I said I am not going to complain out loud at all about the fact that my thumb It just sort of hurts like a fat kid who consumes nothing but tater tots and Mountain Dew I will say your home looks like what a 12-year-old thinks a businessman lives here And like a fucking eight months eight months the last time I was in New York and I Because of when you ripped your couch apart with your bare hands Yes, so we had a big fun zoom meeting with all of like various friends got together was very loud No, I didn't hear anybody. I just have to say this when it comes to zoom meetings You have to it's hard for us because all of our friends are entertainers. I'm going to save for the most part

Extremely extroverted except for maybe a few we need to start peppering extroverts introverts extroverts introvert introverts because our zoom meeting Was just everyone shouting at the same time and what I realized is when you actually go to a party People break off into different sections different sections and they hang out They're normally the entire party doesn't hang out face to face to face to face to face with 20 people at a time Everybody's screaming at each other and we were trying to have sign conversations, but it doesn't work No, everybody hears the side conversations. It doesn't work kissle revealed Within his home that now he only has the one recliner in the living room. No other chairs

Is that is absurd You then have the one recliner in the other room with the 70 inch TV for the for your video games in the other room So your one your main room has the big 70s TV You go to the other room as a 70 inch TV with just one recliner just four feet closer to it And you do have a bed which I really appreciate it Honestly, I was very surprised about how organized your little office was my office is very nice puffing goes in there It's almost like you don't do any work in there. No, it's not like that because Puffin goes to the bathroom in there and they pick up a lot of that and he drinks his water in there

And that's where his food is. Anyway, what I'm saying is yes, I am living a 12 year old's dream right now It's cuffing season and puffin has put that little arm that little wrist bracelet on me So it's not hanging out. You just got 10 to 25 my friend of puppy love. Oh my goodness All right. Well, let's jump into some of the news from this week. Obviously some of this shit We all get to it. I'm gonna say congratulations to all of the listeners of this show. We get to put on our Yeah, I heard about Joe Exotic three years ago hats. Yeah, which is very cool Which is very cool for now, but now for a second it was yeah, and it was immediately immediately stopped It's it's out there tiger

Joe Exotic is everywhere the people have been talking about Tiger King for two weeks now It's almost like it's the only thing going on besides a super plague that anybody could talk about because it is not about Super plague which is nice. I will say upon finally seeing the sixth episode I will say they do it the very end remind you. Hey Thousands of tigers were abused and murdered during this whole process So they do make you feel a little bit guilty about the exaltation of some of these tiger farm owners at the very end But in the end, I think we all know all these people are pieces of shit Well interestingly enough on kind of fun the wrestling podcast this week

We did have a little bit of a crossover because undertaker Mark Calloway, you know undertaker Yes, he went he's friends with dr. Antel or not friends, but he went to the park Well doc Antel probably says he's friends with the undertaker But I don't think the undertaker is friends with doc antel. I think dr. Antel just wanted a bunch of pictures next to tigers Which is where you know that that is how all of this began But my first things are number one I do not like that people are trying to say that Joe exotic turned his boyfriends gay Okay, this is my stance on this they they didn't not become gay for him because they definitely it's a long walk

It's a long-ass walk to go from because again, it's not like you're sucking a penis of a beautiful man I mean, I'm gonna be anything to Joe exotic. I mean, he's a he's a flavor, right? He's a flavor of the human ice cream, right? That's out there But I'm just saying if I was gonna have an intro to Sucking on a penis my intro probably would be somebody like a Timothy Shamalama ding dong like that little like a way fish Kind of Femi a Femi one like I don't know elephant perhaps Timothy Oliphant. He's cool. He's cool He's a cool guy Joe exotic. He is he is a special breed. He's he's business He's parting in the back and then not quite business in the front. He's looking for work in the front

He's looking for work. He is he's got business on his mind in the front. Yes, he does But I'm going to say this and everything I say is out of love If you are willing to petty tiger if you are to petty tiger if you are willing to suck a dick to pet a tiger That is the gayest thing I've ever heard in my life I do not believe that that Joe exotic had the Unbelievable charisma and charm to change the sexual orientation of these two people in Florida You've never been in the eye of the hurricane or in Oklahoma rather. You've never been in the moment Are you telling me in the moment how I've seen the look I've seen a weird shade cross your eyes in the night

It's four o'clock in the morning. You and Joe exotic are out there. He's giving you a private tour of all these tigers and stuff And he's like, how do you want all this to be? I'm thinking you've ever known. Well, I don't want this to be your entire life Yeah, all you got to do is get it get all my straw Like that's all you got to do and you're sitting there. You've probably had what 19 beards. Oh Yeah, you can tell me if I fucking all I gotta do is take your little fucking noodle right there And I had to put it in my big old mom right here. You're you're you ready to go. You're ready to shoot Yeah, I could come I could come in like a minute. I can come in a minute, right? All right So I just gotta let it steep

Let's go steep in my throat for a minute or so and then you're just gonna go and I'm you know I've beaten horrible shit in my life. I could do my mouth isn't a French press. I'm gonna let it steep in my mouth But I get in there. I mean, I think that in that moment You might at least entertain the idea of sucking this penis to see the tigers But to get married is really difficult and you know, what's even more difficult. It's the photo shoots. Yes All the photo shoots. It's the photo shoots that it to me is when you're really starting to think man Like how much do I love these tigers? How much do I love these tigers that?

To me is one of the issues that I have when people try to demonize Joe exotic Those two men made consensual choices to take those pictures to fall in love with Joe all to pet a tiger Whatever the reason you suck a dick, whatever it's gonna be But here I do have an update from John Finley his second husband. He's got new teeth. Oh, it wasn't because of meth He's what he says. He said it was genetic reasons that made him highly Acceptable at to enjoying meth, but he said that it was genetic reasons why he lost his teeth Which I had never done heard unless you just like unless your hands are Malformed to the point that you can't use the toothbrush, but then some people even use their feet

There's that whole movie where Danny Day Lewis painted all those paintings with just his fucking feet Yeah, he's an actor who had a you learn how to do that on his own without losing his hands think about that Yeah, you lose your hands. You learn to paint with your feet. That's incredibly difficult What what a movement but but think about it you have the option to paint with your hands But he but just the power of money and cameras He taught himself how to paint with his feet just to show people he could do it Well, I don't think that Joe exotics at Joe exotics ex-husband is a world-famous actor I never heard of having genetic

Like I don't know we're gonna hear it now now. We're definitely gonna hear it I don't know you do have a genetic disorder where you choose just fall apart Please tell me that but I guess it does make sense, but I don't think that he did it without some Methamphetamine. It's I think it helped. Yeah, I had to at least it had to quicken the process a little bit I think so and so that was one question another one. I want to say I get this is a quick little update on Joe exotic it has now come out that he absolutely does not sing his own songs Musicians Vince Johnson and Danny Clinton are responsible for these bops according to men's health commu was actually put all over the place several different places

The health is stretching a little bit to think that this should be included in their magazine in whatever What does this have to do with men's health in any way? They truly just do whatever and I and if you when I learned from Robert Moore's Twitter account Robert Moore did the Podcast Joe exotic Tiger King for Wondery that came out like a year ago. Okay, and he did a he did a telephone interview With Vince Johnson, okay when the first thing he comes out of his mouth He's mean like tell me how much am I getting paid for talking about Joe exotic and it's like I'm sorry sir This doesn't really work like that because now we're trying to keep your integrity. We can't really pay you so I thought you were with GQ It's like I did freelance for GQ

I did he's like what seemed to me told me you're from GQ GQ's got pay me some GQ monies where I start talking about some Joe Exotic, I don't talk to Joe exotic for free. I've already done enough work for Joe exotic for free Wow, and then he went and called Joe exotic a slippery eel Instead of Joe exotic was a yeah He said he was a slippery eel so that he was also waiting for money for it from his songs and so they paid Joe exotic Let's call him mr. Maldonado passage. Oh, I'm gonna see you refer to him in this way for this time period He went ahead and paid for these songs or asked for these songs He commissioned these songs in order to say I own these songs

They are my songs. I am going to tell the world that I'm singing them They sort of had a one says that they didn't have the agreement to say that Joe exotic was in fact singing the song Okay, another one says it seems to be fairly um seems like they didn't really hammer out those details Like they should have but Joe exotic. It's just what an interesting psychological experiment to watch him Know that those aren't that know that that is not him singing and Continue to push it as if he's singing but you know, it seems to show some sort of distancing from reality I completely agree and of course this is the name of the band is the Clinton Johnson band It is headed up by Vince Johnson and Danny Clinton brilliant two names actually for a band

Clinton Johnson sounds very good. Of course. It did get a president in some trouble didn't it there Your time machine once you go fucking work for Jay Leno if you're bringing that shit in this house Jay Leno was currently doing a live stream where he talks all about the the funny Dancing of Judge Edo because that was a great time for American comedy the dancing Edo's It was so the Clinton Johnson band. They are they're not just fine with being E-level celebrities. They want to get paid. So they're wanting out there. They are talking to the record industry They're like, hey, I didn't even know what record industries exist anymore sub pop. Hey sub pop We are going to sub pop records. Isn't that the one with like the fucking pixies on it?

Yeah, that's like the cool one That was like all the punk bands and stuff like that which I think the Clinton Johnson band probably could fit in with I am not going to lie here kitty kitty is one of the funniest videos I've ever seen It is very best music I've ever heard and Joe exotic The only thing that gave it away during the documentary Was when he was talking about his ex-husband who had passed away because of an accidental suicide No, I know and he calls his he calls his testicles little chicken nuggets of gold little nuggets of gold But that was the only time where I said Joe exotic is lip-syncing here

And it was it was a small hint to the fact that perhaps he wasn't the genius behind those songs You're just willfully ignorant, but I applaud you continuing the exuberance of your naivete. Thank you Thank you very much. Just one thing I want to clarify here So there was one member that we talked about extensively on last week's episode It was the staff member that went in put their arm in a tiger cage and maybe that tiger ripped off that arm But sacrifice Nonetheless, they were back a week later because that's how much they love tigers and Joe exotic But evidently this is a transgender man. Saf is the name

So he is he goes by the pronouns he him and that was just something that was a little bit interesting That the documentary sort of I guess Didn't really address but and then the last thing we have is Carol Baskin as the heat she is she is the last ravioli Sitting under a heat lamp at a cheesy Italian restaurant. It is turning up But now we're getting a lot of people right because there are people some people are saying they're defending big cats rescue I've seen some people say that she's doing good work I've had some people listen to Carol Baskin's entire side of her story saying that well

Postulating that her husband or previous husband was suffering from Alzheimer's and no no he's doing which I think But she I understand that big cat rescue was doing it was doing its best to be legit But they were still in this world where I don't think anybody gets out clean I don't think so either and When someone has a significant other a partner go missing Usually then that means that they killed their part. It's pretty much always the way for the husband It's and when it's not it's at least somebody close and I always somebody close unless they are because he wasn't that much of a fucking millionaire And he wasn't well known enough. I mean, I don't know I'm postulating

No, he wasn't that rich. I mean by by big cat rescue Maybe he was rich, but the interesting thing that we found out is Hillsborough County Sheriff Chad Chronister He said during during an interview that the last dealings we had with Miss Baskins were back in 2011 evidently during this meeting they did Offer Carol an opportunity to take a polygraph test everyone else agreed, but she declined So I'm not saying that that makes her guilty

No, it does make her concealing something. She's hiding. I will say that any good lawyer Will tell you to never take a polygraph very true. That is very just yes Yeah, but I you know you gotta listen to your defense attorney. You gotta listen to him like yes I may seem like you're guilty, but to me that's not what made her make me That's not what makes me think her guilty. It's her entire life. It's everything She's done that makes me think she's guilty according to the Sheriff Chronister again He says it almost seems like our investigators at every turn Encountered another obstacle that he goes on to say I'll give you an example

He had two security guards both of them at the front gate of his property. They interviewed them separately You have one saying I haven't seen him of course referring to Carol Baskins now dead husband I haven't seen him in six months. You have another saying I saw him last week And these are two people two individuals that work closely together. So it's an extremely Convoluted case that that's according to the sheriff and I'm assuming if you're Carol Baskin now You probably shouldn't have said yes to the documentary Probably not but she's suing everybody that is around Everyone's getting very litigious Joe is also suing for 94 million dollars

They're all trying to see what they could do to get out of this because no one is first of all jokes I think apparently is thrilled with his fame. He's so excited, of course Sure, this is exactly what he's always wanted with these type of eyeballs all on him all Dissecting all to call it a hero. He's so so excited Which is good and bad, but now they're suing as well So we'll see how all of this plays out We will see and I said this on the stream last week, but I do want to make this point Harvey Weinstein got 23 years in prison. He's a serial rapist a man that should never be out on the streets Joe Exotic got

22 for being set up by Jeff Lowe who I think is the worst person in the entire in the entire documentary No matter what you think of Jeff of Joe Exotic 22 years is just way too long. Well, he needs to get out earlier several attorneys emailed us all saying basically what you see here is that they had a very weak case Towards Joe Exotic right trying to basically say that he it's very difficult to truly prove that he paid $3,000 to to Jeff Lowe's goon to kill Carol Baskin And so that's why you put all of the real crimes Which is all the animal abuse on top of it to essentially like show a bunch of videos of

Mount nurse tigers and cages to get the jury against Joe Exotic and then just throw the book at him Which is essentially what they did which you know They get you one way or another. Yes, what happens in this life You got to watch your fucking actions because karma is a fucking bitch and that karma is named Carol Baskins apparently Yep. Yeah Okay, Grim sleeper is dead Grim serial killer Grim sleeper serial killer Lonnie Franklin jr. Found dead in a prison cell This is from NBC news. He was found unresponsive in his cell Saturday night. No one really knows yet We don't know what the reason why he was dead

There's no signs of trauma. So it seems they might have died of a heart attack. He's not a nice man He seems to be um I think it was the pressure of just being alive with a weight of all his crimes He was a former mechanic and garbage man to remind you He was convicted in 2016 of the murders of nine women and a teenage girl in Los Angeles from 1985 to 2007 He took a break. He took a 12 year break his Franklin's moniker derived from what authorities believe was a break of more than a decade He was convicted of murdering seven women from 1985 to 1988 and the others were killed from 2002 to 2007 We're waiting for more information. Yeah, come out about the Grim sleeper because there was that documentary series on HBO, which was very interesting

But we want more information before we will begin to do some sort of heavy-hitter Yeah, show on him. Well, so the grease as we will cover it But now he's he is out of the mix. Thank God. No no need for him He it's a good thing that he is gone and obviously I say those things very very very rarely He was found guilty as Henry said ten counts first-degree murder. However please when raiding his home found photos and videos of a hundred and eighty women if that number if That means he killed a hundred and eighty women or if there's multiple photos of more than one woman We don't know but if if he is over one hundred

He would then be the worst serial killer in American history Surpassing Samuel little so it was now the other one which is which is also brutal also came out this year again Waiting for more information on that before we approach it, but he apparently was involved in a Essentially he he gang raped who's part of a gang rape situation when he was in the US Army this was Lonnie Franklin Jr. And he sort of picked up the idea of taking pictures of his victims from that Encounter where he basically one of the other guys involved in it to was taking pictures and something came out in him towards it So he became a collector of pictures of his victims So we will find out because Samuel little is the one that could draw all the pictures from memory

Yes, we also don't know whether or not he's full of shit and just some interesting Weaver of tales who's trying to basically Monopoly he's trying to get whatever he can after on this and attention because what we know from like Henry Lee Lucas Exaggerating his crimes or Ted Bundy exaggerating his crimes Essentially, you're just trying to trying to fight for either private time in the law offices in the law library Trying to get out you trying to have more meetings with lawyers trying to get out of Gen pop Or you're just trying to increase your cloud. You're trying to increase your cloud in jail So that you can you get basically people being more afraid of you and there's less

Opportunities for people to fucking just kill you in your sleep and I've asked this question multiple times on last podcast on the left Why would these people exaggerate and it's interesting because prison is an invo inverse world where the worst you are Specifically when it comes to murder that is a bet that's better for you Obviously, you know pedophiles rapists. Those are the lowest rung murderers are actually treated with relative respect and most white collar Criminals end up having a job being a jailhouse Lawyer whatever it might be basically if you have a mod if you have the smallest amount of education You have a position where you help people with their paperwork. I forgot about this about how they caught They they caught him by finding his his pizza what he was left over miss pizza his pizza crusts

They had cops posing as a waiter and they caught his fucking pizza crust They got it. This is wow. What what a reason to finish your pizza If you if you're a serial killer in hiding consume all of your food He was 67 years old at the cause of his death He could have been caught a lot earlier But as we talked about in previous episodes oftentimes in the poorer communities these serial killers are allowed to go Without anyone noticing because we have people that they target usually African-American sex workers Which is exactly who he targeted his neighbors as a matter of fact would discuss how they would hear screams coming from the shed

I guess that wasn't enough to get out of bed and go be like what you what you doing in there mr Mr. Sleeper grim sleeper. I heard a scream the other day, and I I did a look good I looked then I went back in the house. Well, you are fortunately your hero You got the slime squad you have a lot working out. How is the slime gang by the way any any updates no slime around? Maybe that started the coronavirus I I mean, I don't know I've not received a picture of slime in a while, and I keep looking I've been looking a lot of I've been looking at slime on Instagram Okay, and any is are you forming any idea of what your slime might be?

I think it was it was some form of heroin junkie slime Slash throw up. It was something in there. I have a I've had a couple of weird things happen to me in the last the last two days Okay, honestly, so We are we are trying to move that you remember the belt episode Right, so this is a difficult time to move it just it took us it just a very long process We've been horrible time for you to be moving, but we've been trying to move since November of last year Right, so it is a thing. So now this is just when it landed This is just when it's fucking happening. So we're trying to figure it out the last time

We got really close to me able to leave our apartment. That was when that belt incident happened, right? I lost my belt lost the belt and you found it again I didn't lose it or something happened goblins the goblins. Yeah, but I swear fucking God, right? We're not going anywhere in the house We're quarantine. Yeah sitting in an house. Well, this was pre-quarantine. So we can't blame quarantine for this No, now I'm talking about right now three days ago. Okay. Oh, is there another is there been a goblin uptick? All right, so we I go to two places. I go to my home. I come to the studio So we keep up the level of quality on the show in the studio and I fucking I have dissented I fucking

disinfected this whole place beautiful Howard Hughes Could take the tissue boxes off his feet if he came into this student. Oh, he would love it And so I I you know, where am I going? I was looking for one of our mics We were I had a record from home for side stories last week Yeah, I was looking for one of my mics and I couldn't fucking find it anywhere It's always in the same spot have spot. I put it in okay fancy Mike. Where have I been? I haven't gone anywhere No, right the last time I had it with me was when I was on the road in January when we where I was recording from Atlanta, right? Okay

So I go look for Mike can't fucking find anywhere. I tear the house apart. I tear it apart I go through I look where the belt was I go through the bottom all my drawers. I go through everything it is Is gone it is so gone. I go to buy I bought a new mic before they had it But they did the whole fucking the whatever the embargo on Amazon deliveries about a new mic You know a new mic derived started working with it Fucking two days ago. I swear to fucking Christ. Uh-huh We were we folded laundry did laundry and folded on top of it was on top of my desk I leave I come back the microphone is sitting on top of the laundry

It is sitting like it looks like it's been jammed to the side of it And I asked Natalie did you find the microphone and put it up here and she's like no I didn't do it Mm-hmm, and then I was like I this was fucking gone This is a brand new pile of laundry that microphone is now just now. It's just out. It's just sitting there It's just another it's like it looked like somebody went like hi. Hello. Hi. Remember me and To the point and I was I didn't want to show Natalie how spooked I was right because I'm trying. I'm so strong I'm so masculine and she looks to me as being the anchor of our home Definitely an actual home that that's a good one. Yes. I'm the rock sure. Oh, well, yeah the captain

What now we're getting a little she might be the captain, but you can be the anchor. I am an anchor Okay, yes, I'm the chef great if we were a boat I'm the chef for the boat. That's wonderful And she's the beautiful breasts of the mermaid on the front of it Well, that might get you in trouble as a chef if you're like every time she comes in just what's a chicken parm and then you're like Yeah, you're the beautiful breasts. I want the chicken parm, huh? That is it how do you like you have it's like you of we're listening to a conversation. We had in our kitchen I I

She said because then she's freaked out and she's not freaked out about goblins because she still thinks that I'm just stoned all the time And I just like I you know, I'm not stoned all the time and my stone brain Ain't that stupid because my stone brain got me this far, huh, right? Well, I think I'm mostly sober for the show But um, okay, so this is so she didn't got concerned. This is the second time this kind of episode she then she's like But because she doesn't get freaked out She saw that I was freaked out and but she wasn't freaked about goblins. She was like, do you think a man? Broke into her home and it's like waiting for us BTK style that and so I say of course not But secretly I go and check every single closet to make sure well

She didn't say the ultimate paranoid thought and I was just like and I'm thinking we've been here. We've been here all day We're not going fucking anywhere So I did the same thing afterwards and I said like thank you for bringing my microphone back to the sky And I let I have I keep like roaches for this And what I do is I light up a little roach and I leave it at my cheddar goblin altar to help counter whatever's going on But that was fucking reeky. Well, maybe they want a full joint. Maybe they don't want your weed trash Which is what a roach is no weed roach is a fucking a A booey in the storm

Roaches one of the best things that you could have around you always keep a pile of roaches because then you can fucking When things go dry, then you always got like one or two hits. I'm not a fucking junkie. I'm just saying how it works I do love that we come from such working-class families where I totally understand and I completely agree with you Yes, I had roaches my entire row. I have done desperate things with I've just I've seen a roach And I've screamed enjoy I have my little but I still have my little clips you come back in the day I have like a weed paraphernalia box that I did I pick it up and it's fun because it reminds me big Lebowski Mm-hmm, but let's move on to Well, I can't say it's more pleasant news, but it does involve poultry

There was a dude. Oh, yeah, this guy. Hey, what are you gonna do about this guy? I love the picture of him. Just I there's something about this type of man They have all the same pictures for all of their social media accounts, which it looks like they're looking down on it on a bound man Yeah, right there just like looking down on a bound man. They're like, yeah fresh meat. Yeah, fresh meat This is a picture this comes from crime online calm. It's this is I'm not I I hope this is real Well, I'm also I'm reading this article for I'm reading this article from the US Sun as well So, oh wow, yes, and I'm looking at the Clinch County news This is Clinch County news man arrested for sexually assaulting chicken and then making

Terroristic threats. All right, so number one. Let's just stop this here. First of all Sexual assault is a way too fancy word of saying fucking a chicken. He fucked he was making he was making love No, Henry you say making love you say making love, but I don't think making love I think the only thing you can say here is he's fucking a chicken. Yes. He was funny fuck He fucked this chicken so now so we have that so we have the chicken fucking which is you know straight out of pink flamingo Straight out of a John Waters classic disgusting. I guess he's got to do it. It's you know, it's quarantine It's for everybody's reacting different. No chicken is safe But then the terroristic threat to me the headline as far as crimes go

It's the terroristic threat is as a civilian that to me is more scary if my neighbor is making a terroristic threat I'm like, that's not good. If I find out he's fucking a chicken I say well no more chicken for you and then obviously I would have a distance But I wouldn't personally feel like he's about to kill me. Well, okay, so here like so this is two separate arrests Oh, okay, a Clinch County man is facing a felony Bestiality charge after being caught on video. Oh having sex with the chicken. I don't know where he sent it I think they said that he posted it to his Facebook account. Get all the way Neda he's 69 of Chester Maddox Road address was charged with bestiality on Tuesday, right?

By the Clinch County Sheriff's Department. Okay, I guess he paid bail I don't know how much bail it is to be loosed from a bestiality charge I mean, I'm hoping it's more than 500 bucks I don't know what bail is but I know the sentence if he is convicted carries a one to five year It's one to five years in prison. So you imagine you show up in prison. We were just talking about the hierarchy What are you getting? What are you in for? I think this guy might get bullied by the pedophiles I think if you say I'm a chicken fucker I think you'll get a couple laughs. I'm like you crazy man

Or what do you really do? And it's like I found me the sluttiest chicken in the yard because I knew that's come for Because I was picking and mixing I knew I was just I was lighting a candle Chicken didn't even know that it was on a date. Well, I and you're like I did you are and then you were gay Yeah, you might get beat up. I honestly think that you might just be kind of a character I think you're gonna get beat up But you know what personally, I'm very happy that you're here chicken fucker because my name is Jared Fogel I have been a subway. I was the subway superstar. Yes, I am in here for doing horrible and thinking horrible things about children But for the one time I feel like I have more clout than you in jail. So you're gonna have to be my bitch

We're all right few proms to make lucky noises In the world, unfortunately, that'll make me hungry. So I don't know by the way Jared Fogel is just as fat as his cell now The diet is like a goldfish. He's a goldfish. You go to the side of your bowl. He So, so yes Released for having sex with the chicken. He decided to document it for some reason Or didn't clinch County's service department investigator James Smith It was security camera footage that showed Panada having sexual intercourse

Oh, my so this was like a factory farm. This was somewhere Look at all these ladies lined up in a row and apparently there is a big run on buying live chickens right now That's like a big thing during quarantine times people are buying live chicken So okay, it's asshole when it arrives at the home And so he then made a post where he said he was threatening Everyone in the town by saying that he was gonna shoot them all like dogs and then kill himself but at least he didn't say I'm all treat you all like some of my finest chickens. Yeah, and you go on a town rape

It sounds much worse I would rather be shot like a dog than be treated like one of this weird dudes chickens So that's the terrorism charge when he threatened to shoot everyone like dogs and then shoot himself And I'm going to say this to anyone out there thinking like this just shoot yourself first Because no need no need to risk it. Don't hurt anyone Just you're gonna do that. Just do the first thing. I did have but at the same time Oh, I did have one of them. Just let him fuck these chickens. Do you know Henry? That's not the right solution Do you see how do you think corona coronavirus started from a fresh farm in in Wuhan province now?

All of a sudden you want every chicken fucker on the loose fucking chickens selling them to Purdue? I am I don't know if it was a sexually transmitted disease No, it was either a bat meat or the eight pig meat tainted by batshit We don't know but they weren't fucking these animals. Well, first of all, we don't know what happened But second I don't there is no way that it is healthier to have a society that is having sex with chickens Then it is to have a society not having sex with chickens. I'm saying if it keeps one mass shooting from happening Can't we designate and breed? Certain chickens. They're not robots tighter

Assholes I don't even think that's the problem as a matter of fact that that's probably it's an inhibitor Does it kill the chicken? Oh? Yes Let me look this up. No, it definitely kills the chicken. It definitely goes No, I'm just gonna see what pops up when I says okay fucking will see what Google has to say about it Definitely fucking chicken kill it sex with the chicken. Oh If chicken butt can accommodate a grade triple a egg It can expand to fit your dick that it says a fit. That's what it says right up here sex with chicken at everything to comm

It's the very first line You know what was great? That is interesting. I'm so happy the web give us such important information I guess if your dick looks the same as Jeffrey Epstein's which my understanding was egg-shaped Then you know we were wrong. Oh, is it not who has the egg? It was Weinstein had the white wine. It has the no wait No, I'm flipping it. We were originally wrong. Oh, you're confusing. I don't they both have weird ding-dongs All I know is I'm not trying to have sex with these chickens, and I don't want the chickens to die I just don't know if you can Can you train it up? No, you cannot train it up their chickens

They are basically heads of lettuce lettuce with little eyes. I know I don't I'm I I guess I'm gonna walk back my comments I guess I'm gonna walk them back and say I shouldn't do it, but I I you know anything that saves a human life, right? You know it is interesting I totally had a thought you mentioned mass murder and I had such an American thought and I was thinking so now I You know when it comes to the coronavirus deaths and we'll keep you up to date on all what's going on with that on abling It's top at we have a lot to talk about when it comes to what's going on as our civil liberties are getting eroded by the DOJ But that's not for the show. No, no, no, you already put me to sleep

But when it comes to the mass murders, you're right We're not gonna see one during quarantine. There's no one out But I wonder do you think that there might be a slight this this could be a weird time Where there's an uptick of a serial killer activity because well I wonder if people are in quarantine and if you're not regularly checking up on a group of people like this People are very vulnerable and they're literally just sitting in their homes and everyone's so afraid to go outside So if they do hear somebody screaming for help, they might be less likely to go help and not because they're afraid of the Repricutions, but they're a little I mean like not the murder repercussions. They're they're they're afraid of the virus repercussions

I had the exact same idea when it comes to home invasions I guess that's kind of the theme for the day But obviously we have some like a Richard Ramirez BTK that would go in they would scout out the people do most people though Who go into a home usually it's just there for thievery not most of the time they're there just for thievery Yeah, so I very rarely a lot of times if they're in there and they kill you they were gonna kill you anyway I you know what does that company is that comforting? Yeah, I mean, I guess it's better than stealing my belt and misplacing my microphone. Just get it over with please I don't want to die. No, I know and I don't want you to die like that

Thank God Natalie works out and she will be able to protect you despite the fact that yes You will be the first to approach the murderer, but then once you get down I get him tired the goal is that I tire him. I murdered Natalie cleans up and lifts because someone has to get I mean when he's Who will get Wendy to college? I drive her to college puppy college is not cheap these days That is for damn sure, but I heard first-hand account of my fur of the first murder that I heard about I was talking to my friend Ben, he's the bartender at skinny Dennis. We got to speak through a window as if we were in prison for Stealing a whole side the bar. Yes, because our bars are doing to go our bars are all doing to go cups What yeah, which is I mean I haven't had any because I'm not drinking it at home

No But you like just go up to the window and just press being like I remember when yeah, oh boy I could sit down on a stool with the beer in a shot Yeah, I'm peanuts. I'll remember when and they're like sir move along You're fogging up our windows with your cheese breath But so I was speaking with Ben through the window and it really is like that because they have a neighbor who if there's like more than Three people waiting for a beer show just call the police to the point where the police have now showed up and said if you could tell us Who this neighbor is we will actually arrest her for so many false police reports, but nonetheless his neighbor

Apparently a dude from Trinidad Stabbed his girlfriend to death at 4 30 in the afternoon called the police that I stabbed my girlfriend to death and was arrested and that was And that happened last week That was my first account that I have heard from a from the neighbor Ben Again skinny Dennis when it opens, please go support him great country bar, but that is my first firsthand hearing of an actual domestic dispute that ended with ended with Miradair, which It's going to happen Natalie's been talking a lot about trying to figure out some sort of benefit some kind of program Something we could work towards people that are stuck with their abusers right now. Oh my truly they are stuck in an abusive relationship

At home that's gonna be so scary. I You know my solution is I was saying like go and then if you are being abused I mean, this is real not really advice. So take this with the grain of he's a comedian you leave your home Get COVID try to get it bring it home Let him get it or her get it too because women can abuse absolutely Absolutely, let her get it to try to bring them on the inside do it like how we did it to the Native Americans Yeah, that's exactly what I was thinking is all it also is very illegal to make yourself a biological weapon

So well, well, let's make it a big grain of salt, but nonetheless, it's an idea Henry and that's what this show is all about All I do is all I do is get free ideas. I get free content to be you know, and I just try to I try to make people better Alright, well, yes, you yes, you do. I want to tell this one really quick story about this naked man Okay, yes, please so this story as I mentioned earlier We have a little tale of a naked man, and I always follow the tale of a naked man naked man You do I don't want to talk about it. This dude's name is Jalen clay He went into a rocky top market, which we've all been there What's a rocky top mark?

I have no idea but the name of the market is rocky top market And he allegedly took a bottle of water and left without pain. So then people were like what the hell bro? Yeah, you're stealing you're stealing also you're stealing like the most boring thing to steal which is water It's relatively plentiful. Yeah, you could you can't get it from a faucet. Yes If you are desperate need you can just get it from the faucet even in a bathroom, of course You can get water somewhere so witnesses told investigators that clay he wasn't happy with just stealing the water He re-entered the store shortly and began kicking items off the shelf again Remember completely nude clay let clay then allegedly punched a woman in the head and then to top it all off

The piece of the resistance he just started throwing sausages at the clerk You know, we're talking about the front lines of people who have to deal with psychos every day every day The last thing you need when you are working as a clerk at the rocky top market is a man naked throwing sausages that you You really don't but at the same time catch those sausages. That's free food because once he tosses them and touches them I bet you can't resell them now. You got food take it home That's a free ass sausages, and if you're gonna be assaulting with something that is technically that is did you know? I come at me with a sausage Are you Jim Bezos? That's not how you feed your employees hoping a naked man runs into their store and throws sausages at you

Evidently who evidently cops they were able to Overwhelm the man and now he faces charges of assault no word if that's for punching the woman or for throwing sausages I'm assuming punching the woman but then again, maybe the person was very offended by having sausages thrown at him Also when it comes to Jeff Bezos, I just mentioned and I'm gonna talk about this more on abling and stop it as well But did you see all of the Amazon employees there? They are going on strike going on strike and I am pro strike for Amazon employees that monster needs to treat him better And not just give them the sausages that are thrown their way We have stopped ordering from Amazon until whatever this strike is over great

So we are going to do that as well. I will say did they overwhelm him by explaining to him How much New York City needs ventilator masks and they're not getting them. I don't think that he cares You know, isn't that the interesting thing Travis morning star our producer said that he just recently went into Manhattan He said it's nothing but National Guard and soldiers there to protect I guess and homeless people So I think this is actually if you're homeless in New York, and I might be speaking out of turn here But it seems like they're doing okay. I I I'm gonna maybe disagree, but I am gonna refer to your own bit your bit from fucking 12 years ago Where you said homeless people it's more like a more your your home more your home more because the whole place is your home

And that is a classic quintessential kissal bit if you look back on an album that was never recorded You would see that bit from 2008. I want to read this story. This is really interesting If anybody has any of these tales, please send it to me This comes from charlotte stories.com by Scott Jensen flying dinosaur sightings what on the rise in North Carolina? North Carolina has been home to legends of Bigfoot the Lord the Lake Norman monster and lizard men, which is true very interesting story We might even cover some lizard men for cryptids later on We're gonna be doing a lot of weird episodes this summer Because we're all sick of all the virus news. So let's fucking get wiggity with it. Absolutely

But there's a growing belief that modern pterosaurs living in the earth Carolina that they might be there Pterosaurs are flying reptiles that many scientists believe when extinct a long time ago. Wow cryptozoologist Jonathan Whitcomb author of the books modern pterosaurs Searching for a rope and finding God. I don't know what rope and sorry. I don't know what that is He said on a press release about these creatures including new pterodactyl sightings in North Carolina. He commented it My associates and I believe that these are non-unstinct pterosaurs But many page persons would call pterodactyls or flying dinosaurs Okay, Cynthia Lee who has been studying to become a veterinary technician

Reported to Whitcomb an apparent pterosaur that she saw on Thursday, January 4th in Raleigh She was sure that the fry the flying creature had no feathers But it did have a long tail with a diamond shaped bowl, but the end of the tail It also had a head it also had a head crest She also swatted the creature last week following Wednesday snow This is from March 25th, so it's not that long ago And you're Whitcomb also wrote an extensive article on live pterosaurs.com which you can go do for all your live pterosaurs needs

Which includes several additional additional North Carolina sightings listen and Charlotte, North Carolina a man and his cousin So something bring into his mind the word dragon a man said it looked like what I had seen in a Jurassic Park movie In Asheville, North Carolina a lady saw a huge blackwing creature fly very low over her car It had no feathers, but sharp edges to its features and Jacksonville, North Carolina An eyewitness saw something huge flying in the sky It looked like a pale greenish white and smooth skin It didn't appear to have any feathers and it had the tail with the diamond shape at the end North Carolina

It's considered by many cryptozoologists to be one of America's seven pterosaur hotspots which includes California watch I'm gonna start looking into here, please Texas, Virginia you got North Carolina and Georgia No, this court Matt Cartmel professor emeritus of evolutionary anthropology at dookie University Said it's not impossible for there to be living pterosaurs today But it is high that it might that it's not impossible for there to be living pterosaurs today But it is highly unlikely. All right

Well, I can't believe that if there were living pterosaurs in North America three centuries of naturalists Explorers farmers hunters trappers biologists would never have run across a single specimen living or dead I'd rake it out as it being slightly more probable than living the unicorns and Raleigh and Durham, but only slightly Okay, I don't need your phd snark. Okay, tell me okay, but I'm kind of University fucking bullshit. Also my question is they that's three witness accounts plus the main source of the story That's four accounts This man is just he just said oh no one's saying that they found them But we just have four people saying that they saw something

Yep, so he maybe needs to open up his third eye a little bit And I don't mean the one that you're thinking about I mean the one in your forehead And maybe he needs to look into this because it's interesting Did you see all those pictures of the random flying what they're calling like a moth man and stuff like that in Jersey? Yes, they're doing in Chicago and Chicago is also having a run on a flying humanoid cases as well It's very interesting side stories LP ot l at gmail.com. Let us know is it possible that you can actually have a Animal that was extinct to come back or was it ever not extinct? I don't know if you've been see you've been seeing these damn lizards

You tell us I want to see some I want to see some lizards Absolutely way for us to go because that's one thing we can do we can drive around the latest stay inside your car Look for lizards, dude This would be a cop tries to tell you for non-essential business They try to stop you in California to start to do that. We're trying to stop cars I'm saying like I'm looking for living pterosaurs, and then I will take my ticket Yeah, I don't pay for it because that is what a crypto zoologist is supposed to do You're supposed to spend money on things that don't matter or you get pulled over by a police officer

Well, who understands that that is quintessential business that is The car with you and then you and a cop and you guys are driving around next thing You know you got a pilot especially in LA if I look for a fine nice Advantages I'm gonna say advantage is forward-thinking police officer and what's it coming with me looking for lizards and an opportunity that I'm gonna call it an Opportunity okay to join me to I mean yes, I'm not gonna pay you extra No, I can't pay you out, but you're getting paid an experience and possibly we can get some kind of sizzle reel out of this Absolutely, I think Henry and the cop We're out we're investigating. I think that sounds absolutely wonderful and well who knows what's going on out there in this

Bonkers world. Maybe all these cryptos are out there, and they're saying no one's around we finally get to roam free Maybe they're all dead. They don't realize no most people are in homes in some cases Evidently having sex with chickens which are a dinosaur That's he was outside of his home. He was out he was outside of his home My question is is Beast yeah, is it bestiality? It's a felony. Yes. No, of course. I'm not saying that that is but if the animal like let's say You're found in you're gonna you want to do this you are gonna go down this road. Listen You're found in a shed sure having sex with a

Real unicorn Okay, it is a former Formerly folk creature. It's a fake creature fantasy creature. Okay, right? Someone you're Martin you wake up your wife wakes up at the night. You're not in there You're not in the house. She doesn't know what you're doing. She's supposed to be quarantine. She goes outside in the shed Your husband's fucking a unicorn Do you? Celebrate the discovery of a magical creature first? Mm-hmm, and then say hey stop fucking it, right?

Or do you to do immediately arrest him for bestiality? And then I guess I Guess you you get they set up that unicorn with a cameo account. Yeah, maybe get 50 bucks for a cameo Um, I'm not certain what you do you then you send it to science But if you send the unicorn to science, they're gonna cut its fucking dick off They're gonna try to see how it's got to work. Yeah, they're gonna kill it I mean, but then again your husband is having sex with it So what's a was a cheating fate it is cheating is it cheating it is cheating I think if you put your dick instead of any other living creature, it's technically cheating so if it's dead

It's fine. Well, then you have a whole series of now. I got you legally You're the best divorce lawyer I've ever had Yeah, I get a lot just me being around I have a divorce rate of 75 percent I help I help people get divorced. I just by my attitude I feel like the idea of a human having sex with an animal is less Foreign than actually seeing a unicorn which has never been seen before so I think you look at the unicorn You realize you exit that out and you just look at its head. You're like, holy shit. It's a unicorn. Stop having sex with this It's hand corn pan over

Why are you fucking that unicorn? Exactly? And he's just like wouldn't you I? Come in that shed net unicorns all bent over even though horses are permanently bent over Hmm is all bent over and it's just like I have a wish in my asshole Mr. Broward, you're like, how'd you know my name? Right? You know I mean and you don't know these like I'm trying to help the family Well, that completely changes the corn said if this unicorn said if I could get it pregnant We get a million dollars Honestly, maybe that's how you make more unicorns if the unicorn can talk and it is like telling you to do that and you say Okay, I will comply. I'm a good southern guy. Then that's a whole nother story

But you do have some splaining to do got something to do Well, there's a story I didn't get to we're not gonna get to it But I do want to talk about how Bethany Brookshire on on at be Brookshire on Twitter did this basically found a whole study About how in the 1930s this is comes from the Stephen Stabber story Okay, a doctor was shooting semen into the butts of women in order to stimulate an Immunoresponse to semen to make to basically do old school like birth control by making creating an autoimmune response your body will have to come He was trying to and it didn't work

This was in the 1930s in the 1930s one woman actually it worked for like a year It seemed like or she just couldn't get she couldn't get the minute kept put more common there Where was he getting all the calm a bunch of guys? You know it's strange how medicine has changed over the past hundred years isn't it 90 years ago practice for a reason That is the last thing I ever want my doctor to say it's called practice for a reason well These are called my testicles with cancer for it. Can you really? Oh, please God help me out. Well speaking of sex and doctors. This is hero of the week This week's hero of the week goes to medical fetishists specifically a medical fetish site a

Medical fetish site has donated its entire stock of scrubs after being contacted by quote desperate health Officials the name of the site is MedFet UK. They were contacted by the National Health Service They were like we we freaking need your masks We need your scrubs and these heroes said yes, they said we will not come We will not come for two months to help out the greater good to help out our neighbors And we talk about heroes. They just given them like Like fucking catheters and and like the things that like spread to pussy What's that called that the little alligator clips that they use in gynecological things?

I think that they kind of do a spectrum as a special a specter spectrum spectacle That's my yeah, I know that's a spectacles. What happens after you use it? Yes So this is according to MedFet UK. They said this on Twitter They said today we donated our entire stock of disposable scrubs to an NHS hospital It was just a few sets because we don't carry large stocks, but they were desperate So we sent them free of charge in follow-up tweets They say when you see someone from the government saying the NHS is getting what it needs That is a lie. We have been contacted this week by representatives of NHS

Procurement all over the country trying to source basic protective equipment They go on to say when we a tiny company set up to serve a small section of the kink community Find ourselves being sought out as a last resort supplier to our national health service in a time of crisis Something is seriously wrong. In fact, it's scandalous so thank you so much MedFet UK for giving your fetish equipment to the National Health Service because they need it and you know, we hear about heroes every day every week and These people are heroes and sometimes they're not sometimes they're not this time this time the heroes are heroes now to be fair They did give this equipment away begrudgingly

Um, they did Simon I am of the Conti and the ethics system where I don't I don't believe a thing a truly good Act is one that actually is very annoying Yes, and you don't want to do well because you know it is a small section of the kink community But that section of the kink community is just as valid as any other section and they are now saying we will not reach Ogasm or as much of an orgasm as we can is to help out before your neighbor. So there you go That's it because that's a thing is that they don't they're their cums are gonna be at like 20% Yeah, I mean, there's there's not gonna be anyone wearing scrubs. Maybe they could buy Like gloves is difficult dishes. I'm difficult right now. Yeah, this is a hard time

If you have if you had a ventilation mask like fetish, yeah, this is a hard time for you Well, please if you do give it give it to someone who needs it and again, this is not for this show But we got a lot of ventilators not being used all across this country We got to get a program to get those to the people that need it But that is one small step in the right direction also a great point being made the NHS the National Health Service You can imagine how awkward that phone call was for them because you know for a fact Henry one of those people In a meeting they'd be like we need more supplies. We need more scrubs. We need more masks and just one guy in a With with latex on his hands was like I've come to the call. I've come to her. Yes

No, I haven't had a disease nine years Thanks to the impenetrable mask I wear or just the one guy that has to raise his hand to be like So I know a website. I never I just I rarely go to Hey, I just thought about it from a friend. Yeah, is that right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's called. Um, it's called doctor spread them And he honestly a lot of tools we're looking for really and as soon as he removes them from some of his patients I'm certain we can get a hold of them. Interesting. So I didn't you're such a clean-cut guy I didn't really think that you would have a medical fetish, but I guess you never know, huh?

Yeah, you know, yeah, they call it a practice for a reason. How are you saying it? I So I want to give you a couple shout outs before we before I get to I'm just gonna read one letter of this week Okay, number one got asked to be got asked to give a shout out to our pizza delivery people. Absolutely People out there delivering food You got to get it. You're not gonna get COVID-19 from a pizza box and if you are Truly afraid it's such a small possible and I mean this because I am also I'm one of the people who are truly insane as well You don't got to scrub it down Just you got to think about what her discipline. This is a really good time up for Dune readers

Those of you they're juniors. I finally finished book five last night. Thank God. I finally finished. I'm almost done Oh, how many books are there in Dune? There are so many there's six there are so much fucking in book five at the very end of it They they're 13 year old boy learns orgasm control around episode around page 425 and you watch this woman go I can't believe how strong his thrusts are. It's very intense Frank Herbert was so horny But what I learned it's water discipline, right is you get a pizza box discipline. This is important You don't read the books. You don't know okay But in when you are in the deep in the dunes right of Arrakis

You have to be very important to watch how much water you're wasting So you have to make sure you're still soo and everything is perfectly set together You want to make sure you're not getting rid of any excess moisture? You see how as the people upon Arrakis grow more fat on the Hawk thanks to there They are being the center of the melange during the God Emperor era of Arrakis just as you fell asleep mildly mentioned Amazon worker rights. I am now officially dozing off. Yes Um, but I get you get the pizza box, right? You get it from the man. You can even say don't touch me Don't touch me like you know, and they now right now right now for a very brief window of time. It is not insulting

It's a little you get the box you take it inside the house. You wash your hands immediately Get a get a napkin paper towel slice tissue slice open the box take your spatula Whatever move all the pizza to a plate boom COVID-19 free pizza you could do whatever the hell it is that you want with it You can have your food eat your food didn't eat it. I mean you could fuck it You could if that man if that that man is illegally allowed to fuck that chicken and be released It was a felony. I know but yes I know a pizza is better than a chicken. All right, so let me read this one letter

I thought it was fun because it kind of reminded me because I've been this is this is super spooky Okay, so read this shit cuz I'm dying for spooky and I already got scared about the shit. Hmm My mom's house the house I lived in from middle school to high school is super haunted Right before we moved in we were told by a neighbor that one of the previous residents had died in the house and that other people had Paranormal experiences fuck yes, I would love that now than super unusual mostly just seeing ghostly figures We started having experiences almost immediately after we moved in we were also seeing ghostly figures and getting pictures of them But also having more interactive experiences One of the frame pictures that my mom had would fly off of things even after moving in around even when it was right next to other

Frames our basement light kept burning out right after putting a new bulbs that could be an electrical thing But who knows this happened around four times in a row until my mom got sick of it and asked the ghost to fucking stop It hasn't happened since there was also a piece of our vacuum that my mom had sitting on the dryer in the basement And it would constantly fly off at people as though someone was throwing it while the dryer was off My mom constantly was telling me that I needed to stop pacing upstairs at night because I was bothering her But I was always asleep and now that she's the only one of the house. She's still hearing the footsteps at night Some of the things that have happened include getting grabbed in the shower Hearing footsteps go down the stairs or was being caught in my mom's good security cameras

For these are doors opening and shutting cupboard doors randomly all open with no one hoping no one home to open them In recent years things have really ramped up, but we have also come to expect it my stepdad passed away Almost two years ago and my sister kept hearing someone say her name My mom was worried that it was symptoms of a serious mental illness So naturally decided to contact a medium after my sister saw her doctor The medium walked into the house and immediately described exactly what was happening without any prior knowledge She said that the area is extremely Spiritually active and there was a spirit attached to the land that is causing almost everything

Hmm according to her it was a male spirit that just wants to mess with people It doesn't really want to scare people so we'll stop when asked She did say that my stepdad was trying to talk to my sister and then my sister could hear him So that explained that part I guess the medium has offered to bless the house because she said that the feeling has gotten more Heavy and it seems like there are a lot of spirits going in and out There has been a full-on paranormal investigation done on the house and we contacted the show Dead Files years ago And they contacted my mom during the paranormal investigation the cameras upstairs all shut off at one point and really seemed to freak the people Doing the investigation out so I don't think it was staged

My mom decided she didn't want to be on the show Dead Files because she said they want people to be scared And we aren't actually scared of what's going on quote unquote killing my chance at fame Oh, I actually think that the Dead Files could use people who aren't scared also I think that's actually more of an interesting hook when it comes to ghost stories now I it's cool that these people are like, well, we got a couple of ghosts. They open our cupboards They play with our vacuum they throw a mirror picture around but they're not that bad The more people I hear from dead people who've talked about experiencing these things they talk about it's very up personal It's very difficult to describe to somebody because then people say you're stoned all the time

And you can't either no one trust people say you're stoned all the time I don't know if this mom consumes as much edibles and and vape and and weed as you do then I would say she's stoned all the time, but I'm assuming she doesn't You're right. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Well, thank you so much for that creepy tale Please shoot us more of those side stories LP otl at gmail.com. We love hearing from you and Yes, and we always keep us updated on how you're doing and all of those wonderful things And we hope to keep you keep you entertained and end Feeling feeling connected because that's what we all we all need right now. That's us man. That's we are

Connected because what you know all friends have conversations about is it worse to have sex with a donkey or a talking unicorn or whatever We have you have to we have to we gotta figure out who your real fucking friends are that's a good. That's how you figure it out Absolutely, and I so guys, so what we got going on here April 7th books come out We have a we have a week. Yes today this episode is April 1st I can't imagine the kind of shenanigans that are going on right now How I put all of those funny emails and tweets from all the companies that are congratulating themselves for selling things to you right now Oh, they're gonna be so funny and so with it. I'm so excited to see what they do But next week we're selling our book. Did you see the dates have it changed?

You're gonna see get emails how we're gonna figure out gonna fix this fucking hullabaloo I'll be able to those of you that were supposed to receive our book while we were on this first Section of our tour, but now you're gonna there. We're gonna figure all that shit out We got a bunch of stuff and then we had a new merch store last podcast merch calm Absolutely check out those merch check out the merch site We're selling like hotcakes and we will be bringing some larger sizes some triple X and some we're getting larger sizes We're getting some more female sizes all that we things are a little bit slower than we would like to be because everybody's working on a skeleton crew We want to remind you that if you buy anything from our merch shop

We're gonna give six point six six six point six six six percent of all proceeds to one fair wage For people that are Heather jobs deleted during this time. Absolutely and in August April is now August everything is being delayed this year, but August 2020. We have our dates You can go to LPO on the what is it? What's our what's our Instagram there? At LPO TL, you know at LP on the left. Yes check that out on Instagram. They have the dates and also Ben kiss a one I have the dates on my Instagram as well a August 1st, New York, you can see the whole thing. We're ending we're starting in New York on the 1st of August ending in Los Angeles on the 30th

And we're hitting a bunch of towns In between so we can't wait to see everyone out there Boston Philly Chicago Nashville Denver Lubbock We'll be all around so check out those dates. We can't wait till August. We can't wait to see you can't fucking wait to be out of my home I'm so excited to see people. I mean obviously who fucking knows what's gonna happen in August, but I pretty I mean We we aren't gonna keep trucking. We're just trucking because we don't know how else to do. Absolutely We're just guy here show goes on my friend and we doing it doing it And as Henry said April 7th the last book on the left comes out We cannot wait for all of you to read it Henry and I add a couple of funny jokes

Marcus does an amazing job telling you everything you need to know about some of the most heinous people in The world So go out there buy the book we cannot wait for you guys to be entertained during this crazy time What a great time to start or to to? Refind your love of reading and so get out there. You gotta live. Yeah, you might be stuck inside your home But turn your home into a vacation with booze Turn your home into a vacation. There are a lot of people boozing real hard right now Be careful with the booze. That's why I said I'm not drinking at home

Next thing you know I'm going through a bottle of vodka at night and I end up dying like you know Farley or something No, this is it's hard out there, but you know live like you don't set up a little that's what I've tried to you I had my my office hours During the day, but I know it's I'm fine a lot of let a very little change otherwise Um love your family because if not, they're gonna fucking kill you right now. Yes You reinvest in your family this week That's it. That's their goal. That's good Maybe you fell out of love with them last week fall re in love with them this way sure you got to you have to

Have to you gotta do and then laugh laugh at your wife's jokes laugh at your husband's jokes Laugh when your child brings you a picture even if doesn't look anything like what they drew they did or what it would They were trying to do support them because everybody needs a laugh Well, I do think that in that in that scenario though You just your child brought you a picture of dead Nana and then you start laughing at the kids face And then they realized they're not an artist and then they grow up to be Adolf freaking fucking Hitler or what or it's one of those Would I that's the main reason why we're not having kids is because of the her coming in being like Look, I drew a picture of the tall man who comes in my room at night daddy and you have to be like oh my god

Set this fucking house on fire What if what if the tall man is just me and I'm reading her a nice book and then I say bye bye get out of my daughter's Bedroom without just call us first. Oh, no, that is where you're appropriate. All right, everyone Thank you all so much for listening. Hope everyone is doing all right out there. Hail yourselves. Hail Satan Magusta Lations Hell me oh doing great sounding sounding fresh This show is made possible by listeners like you thanks to our ad sponsors You can support our shows by supporting them for more shows like the one you just listened to go to the last podcast network comm