Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: My Favorite Foot

Episode Date: November 17, 2022

Ben 'n' Henry bring you this week's weirdest stories and true crime news including the woman who stole a dying man's foot for for a bit, more strange orbs caught on video, 10,000 carnivorous Mink rele...ased into the wild of Ohio, the bizarre story of Nicholas Alahverdian, canned pumpkin saves a dog from cancer, a cannibal pigmeat-parkinson conspiracy, and much, MORE!

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 There's no place to escape to. This is the last time on the left side stories Oh god, oh Let's do it baby boy. I will say this right before the show Uh, because I'll call themself a police officer. I did not call myself a police officer You called me a police officer and said I wasn't dressed for the job that you said I had but it's weird to think you just openly lied to start The show he believes somewhere inside of him inside of that big Skull of hits that big old melon that he's got a top at the beer pile Then it's his body. He thinks that he can arrest you and I don't do about it
Starting point is 00:00:49 What are you gonna do about it? I don't want to arrest anybody I've never I wanted to be a police officer when I was like nine and my mom is so funny because she said Benjamin Are you sure it's dangerous? And then I was like, you know what? I'll be a ninja instead Think about ninjas. You got to be able to remove the bells from the mannequin. I know it's extremely difficult I was when I was a child. I think I could have done the parchment paper where you walk walk on it work on it I don't know. I think you're not That you're gross. Yeah, but you were still like six foot. No, I was I was tiny then but now it's actually probably opposite
Starting point is 00:01:21 You know when they get a dog and they've got the big paws and they're like, oh, look at daddy He's gonna grow into his paw. I can imagine what your big flap and feet were like when you were five years old And you're trying to walk across the parchment paper and again It's not maligning you but I feel like you just might be wet ninja and stick to all the parchment paper I didn't mean to jump on you like you really jumped on me. Welcome. This is the show Welcome to side stories everyone. I am bed hanging out with Henry. Yeah, man I hope everyone's doing well out there. We do have a small announcement this weekend Indianapolis Grand Rapids It's gonna be Henry and myself
Starting point is 00:01:55 Jackie and Holden Jackie's a Browsky, of course, and Holden MacNeely Marcus Parks. He's still out with it The little see thank God. It's not the big one yet You see this is a thing Kissel's also been calling COVID the little see the little which you say think is it is kind of cute again In a sort of anti-style way, but unfortunately, yes Marcus's long code but it's gonna keep him from doing the live shows And we got planned for this weekend But it is still gonna be the same amount of hilarity that you have ever like you're gonna be so fun Fine, you're gonna miss the fight by how much fun you're having you're almost gonna feel manic and scared And you're gonna wonder like was it always like this and you're gonna be in sort of a kaleidoscope
Starting point is 00:02:35 Like how will I ever not be high any more kind of vibe? Which is what I really hope for because you know that feeling when you're like 545 in the morning. Oh every day and you've been fucking Partying all night. You know that like that like tight that I just always remember that like you know fucking subdivision Somewhere in Florida and some like some kind of rented home that they somehow for some reason They let a bunch of 20 year olds just have well you rented it the sun's coming up the the animals the insect Stop all the mirrors been pulled off the fucking medicine cabinets. Everybody's like it's that weird thing We're like, I think fucking Becky's dead and then it just turns out Becky's like just gone Obviously, Becky got sick and Becky was sick of being there by 1130 because she was like can we please go home?
Starting point is 00:03:20 I have to go to the golf meetup. Who knows what people did in college anyway. All right Well, let's get into some stories this week. There's a lot of bodies involved this week Oh, there is a lot of insanity that's being done two bodies. Should we start in Wisconsin? Do you want to go with that story? You want to do the grossest story first up top? Sure Well, you did slightly gag in your mouth when you were reading the story and I and that to me that shows me This has potential. I'm just as soon as I'm sick reading it. I'm like, oh Okay, Wisconsin still got it. This is as close as we've seen to an edgine like character, although Not quite as nefarious
Starting point is 00:04:05 It's a little close. It's there are similarities. I think when we break down the story, you will notice a similarity only because both had breasts Mary Kay Brown who was a nurse she plans for a dying man's foot now again You'd think that she'd let him know but again, he's dying. I don't know. He's about to not have that foot anymore But we'll get into the logistics and legalities of all of us, right? Well, the dude was 62 years old and he was in hospice. He was not doing well No, when you are 62 in the thing is in life It's fun to be a spring chicken in it. No, but when it is I don't think so it is because then you have the longevity and Theoretically like you live longer than that's why you smile when you're 20 and you frown when you're 80
Starting point is 00:04:47 It's not true that when I was younger I thought everything was gonna last forever and then but also that was kind of terrifying to me and it felt like all There's like weights on me. I didn't understand how free I was until I turned like 35 But now I actually like life a lot better What I'm saying is you don't want to be the new young stud on the hospice block No, when you're 62 years old like my parents who just snuck into the retirement home at 60 They were the youngest people there and it made them feel very good It's made them feel young made them feel confident and in a way
Starting point is 00:05:18 Didn't it bring the girls to the yard when my father went to the pool? Lord, I think I also my mom my mom actually has this philosophy where she does start to cut off her friends as they reach a Certain dying age. Yes, and then your mother cut off every one of her friends But she does that thing where she's been like, oh, you know Bob or she can't go out anymore And it's like yeah cuz Barbara lost her legs dude a fucking the mistake She made her a whole life and now her legs are gone and she's like well, you know how it is It's like they just don't have a lot of wheelchair access at the quilt stores and it's like that's probably not great But again, that's how my mom my mom gets new blood in there
Starting point is 00:05:52 Which is why she's more effervescent than she's ever been they do need wheelchair access at all quilt stores come on They do what else are they gonna do? I think they need like Enough room that you could just be putting a big longer burger basket and dragged it I never tell you that story about the man who was much larger than 600 pounds in Stevens Point, Wisconsin He when he had to go to the hospital, they had to put him in an ambulance And then they would weigh the ambulance and subtract the weight of the ambulance to figure out how much he weighed crazy, I mean Goblet science, I guess so anyway a big scale
Starting point is 00:06:27 So we don't know why this guy was 62 and in hospice. Let's just say he's not healthy He didn't do well right now this a registered nurse Mary Um, she said that she she's basically it was real proud of her family's taxidermy sure and I Telling all like she told all her co-workers. You see that guy's foot over there I'm getting it and I'm gonna get the fucking foot because it turns out what she said that what she wanted to do She wanted to cut off the foot and then taxi Dermida foot and then put a thing above it because as you'll see it What happens? It was completely eaten up by frostbite We'll get into it fell in his middle of sleep. He fell out of his bed
Starting point is 00:07:05 And there was no way there to watch him and the heat was off into his feet got frostbite There's a fucking nightmare But she wanted to put that frostbitten foot taxidermy and put a sign above it that says wear your boots kids So the entire thing that's why this is Wisconsin and that's why we'll get to the punishment or potential punishment I think it's a little I think it's a little on the high end right now. I mean, but we'll bring it down I think they will end up bringing it down. It's all for a joke. That's Wisconsin It's all the crimes are all for a joke funny little bit fun about moose balls and like I was squeaky the little Cheese bites are you know, I kind of shit
Starting point is 00:07:40 But so he ended up at Spring Valley Because he had fallen he'd fallen in his home the feet went out. He was there for hours No one found him. He had suffered severe frostbite on his feet. This comes from Seattle Times They describe his feet as black like a mummy And apparently yeah, because he was in hospice in and out and so They were looking at him and the nurse said before I mean well now we know she was thinking that she wanted this She wanted her car. She saw it. She she knew exactly what was going on But she saw the foot and she was like we're gonna have to amputate this right and so but the thing is they do need your consent
Starting point is 00:08:18 They need your consent to amputate still no matter what even if I think that if you're unconscious or if it can like But they still have to talk to I believe I might be wrong side stories LP otl a gene Oh, but I believe they need at least necks of Ken's permission to amputate What about the hypocritic oath? Isn't that the thing where it's like if a dude's dying don't you got to help him? We can't spell hypocritic without a hypocrite She said all right We're gonna do this because after he fell because not only his feet were all mushed up because he his feet were all
Starting point is 00:08:54 Mushed up a frostbite he fell back out of a bed and then he made his foot like a backwards foot. It was all fucked up Right, but they asked the dude be like we're gonna need to amputate Can we amputate it and the man who said he was slightly coherent at the time he said no don't amputate it But he did apologize for the smell it was producing in the room. So he said don't amputate it. That's my favorite foot That's my favorite foot. I love that one. Let's light on the late Yankee candle or something because we're getting kind of pungent in here Now I'm gonna say this obviously your mother-in-law. She's a nurse sure and Unlike when you're at your fast-food restaurants olive garden even a fizzoli's the customer might be right Garden the customer is always correct because it's the restaurant that is incorrect. Yes always
Starting point is 00:09:40 But in the case of hospice, I think the customer is often wrong And I don't think the customer knows exactly what is best for the customer and obviously this man again made horrible life decisions Are you a customer or are you plant life? Well in America? You are a customer. Ah, yes indeed That's the way our system works. So I feel like in this case The fact he wanted to keep his diseased foot. I want a foot that is black I thought the war on my foot. I don't think he did he's 62. I don't even think he would be vietnam age I think he missed everything, which is why I fought in Gamergate with that foot Get rid of that foot, but I will the thing is is that the doctors came in because they were like because then the nurse
Starting point is 00:10:24 Hard-pressed and we got to amputate this foot and the doctors like listen He's just about to die Let's stabilize the foot and then we'll deal with foot gate after this, right? He's gonna die, but then he kept living and the nurse just kept getting a hornier and hornier for that foot Like me mother like man, you're still alive more tablet We actually only put out five days worth of tabioka We didn't think he'd keep going and so he's just eating up suck it up the tapioca for the rest of the bucket I drink your milkshake. I know to the rest of the floor, right?
Starting point is 00:10:57 But at the same time he is alive. They're keeping him alive, but eventually she said fuck this This is the right thing to do that foot is got to go. Okay. I'm still not talking about this great bit That and I know bits. I know I know I know Guys I stood in front of there was a group of ravens They were all chewing on a rat on the street And I waited for about 15 minutes to try to get the proper picture because I wanted to put just had lunch with my Agents and put that up On Instagram, it's a funny bit because they're a bunch of ravens. Yeah, and they're all chewing on a carcass, right?
Starting point is 00:11:32 They're scavenging and so funny because my agent fired me long ago, right? But turns out like you know now I'm realizing 25 minutes into waiting for this bit I'm wasting my time, but this woman held on right for days and then finally she's like fuck it She rallied up all the nurses. They pinned the dude down Because again, she can't do anything official to get to anything official because They would know I believe so she used local anesthetic on the foot. That was nice. The foot was so already This is what made me like Kind of sick and Fernando's got a head and his head is in the same as that
Starting point is 00:12:05 Um, she said that his foot was so far gone that all she needed to use to cut it free from his body was gauze scissors It was a gummy ankle at that point It was like a snippet snippet snippet at what point do you say? I'm sorry, sir. We're taking the foot I The other the other nurses they're pulling out the other nurse was like I had no idea I had no idea. We were amputating the foot. All I know is I was holding a man's hand until then I saw loose foot Loose foot everywhere loose foot everywhere, but you know and again, I understand this is wrong You shouldn't be taking people's feet no matter how narrow they are
Starting point is 00:12:44 Person's trash is another person's treasure another person's foot. It's another person's bit Absolutely, but the smell every day you go in you're making fucking maybe nine bucks If you've been there for five years even talking about and then all of a sudden just the every time it hits your face Oh, he's like gotta get that foot out of here But anyway to kind of wrap it up here So when they're like god dang it man, this guy had a foot now foot's gone Who took the foot and Mary Kay Brown was like again. I had a great joke plant. I did take the foot Long story short. She was arrested. She was charged with six different crimes, including
Starting point is 00:13:21 Oh, yeah victimizing someone over the age of 60. I didn't realize that was a special crime I knew that they got like half off on coffee and McDonald's. Yeah, I thought it was really more on that I thought they got to go to the movies at 9 a.m. But evidently that is adding some time or potential time to this crime But the doctors try to stop it apparently they came in she popped the book and she popped the foot in a biohazard bag and popped it in The freezer and she literally like it was fucking like she took her from restaurant and she was just like no Please I'm saving that for is they say in Europe take away You remember Europe and like, you know, it was sitting the freezer And then they watch her like the doctor was like where's that fucking foot at and they're like they all knew because she's been talking about
Starting point is 00:14:05 Bit for days. She's got a bit buddy. Do you have any idea with the late? Okay, kind of good comedian Gallagher went through to get some of his props. All right That's why I don't even want to talk to her at top. I know he's dead. That's why I said the late. Wow He's dead now. How he didn't get to do it and he didn't get to do his uber Helicopter taxi company, which is what he wanted to do But that didn't really happen got it and because I don't really trust the man who created the Sledge-O-Matic to fly me in a Goddamn helicopter, but This woman now faces up to
Starting point is 00:14:41 92 years in prison Henry. I'm sorry even if this was your foot. I would say Good bit. Yeah. Yeah. Just ask the guy. Do you think that's funny because if he's a true Wisconsinite He probably like yeah, that is people should wear their boots They should wear their boots if you sold him the bit like explain to the guy why this is funny, right? Well, maybe he was a bit of a curmudgeon in coherent He also understood that this woman was just coming in and checking on his foot like it was a Beautiful goth titted woman at some bizarre nightclub. I caught a hat by notice there. You still got that foot But you mentioned on yesterday's open lines. Thank you for listening to our serious show
Starting point is 00:15:22 How you would like to sell a feet pics and I said no one want to look at your foot but look at this surprised even this man This man could have had an only Zombie craved his foot. She thought about his foot all night She set out a whole area in the taxidermy shop and I that's where the foot's going and it's really fucked up But the doctor so I was it was saying she put it in the refrigerator, right? He was like where's that foot and the other nurse was like it's in the fridge Nancy's gonna be in a marriage trying to take it home. Whatever her name is, right? And he's just like I want you watching that foot that foot stays with this man
Starting point is 00:15:58 And that's the whole thing just being like that foot needed to be with the guy in the bed Well, apparently according to one of the people that was working with her there She wanted to bronze the foot as well. So which is a very fancy form of taxidermy I suppose I think it's also probably because of this the smell You know, yeah, and again the bit so there you go. She's facing 92 years. What are you in for? Oh, I stole a man's foot. I ran an illegal butcher shop. Yeah, that's what she would say Any hoot. Well, so we'll see what happens 92 years though That's that's too much and I have no idea if the dude's still fucking alive
Starting point is 00:16:36 I feel like there's a lot of people they're gonna immediately say how would you feel if someone took your foot But if I my mind 62 years old in huh me the big foot that looks that is it's rotten off of your body Yeah, it's for your own safety I'm surprised they even let him keep the foot because they knew he was just gonna die and I think at some point That's almost worse though, isn't it? You know, I think it comes down to we've done this with our friends, right? They're so obsessed with wanting this one thing and eventually there's the little bit of your kind of contradictory mind We're like fuck Mary. Yeah, Mary doesn't get the foot because that's the only thing I've heard out of Mary's fucking mouth That's three days
Starting point is 00:17:18 Dagon on the foot also. I don't know. Anyway, all I know is there's a people All right, we're currently incarcerated for doing far more dangerous things for far less time You're allowed to be a hero for one second. I'm just gonna say 92 years is too long This holiday season the best deal in wireless can only be found at mint mobile Right now when you switch to mint mobile and buy any three month plan, you'll get another three months for free This is mint mobile's best offer of the year as the first company to sell premium wireless services online only Mint mobile lets you order and activate from your home with eSIM Well saving tons on phone plans starting at just 15 bucks a month
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Starting point is 00:18:53 Cut your wireless bill to 15 bucks a month at mint mobile.com slash last Hey there podcast listener have you ever been listening to wizard in the bruiser and thought to yourself I wish I could see just how fat Jake and Holden are in real life. Don't lie We know all about your weird inside thoughts listeners Well now you can make that dream a reality because whiz brew and page seven are going on tour Austin Dallas, Milwaukee, Chicago, Minneapolis, DC, Philly, Brooklyn, San Francisco, LA Nowhere is safe from an all-new show. We're calling release the butthole cut. Eww Come join your fellow LPN fans for a night of pop culture chaos. That's fun for the whole family
Starting point is 00:19:40 Assuming your family consists of equally broken weirdos in their 30s It's gonna be a blast tickets are on sale right now at last podcast network.com go go now There's VIP meet-and-greet passes available as well in case you want to get you know a little extra close Especially personal I legally have to clarify that there is no sexual element involved. I mean unless you know Okay, geez chick. All right, stop winking. All right, buddy It's page seven and wizard in the bruiser live go to last podcast network.com for dates and tickets Now look at this video. We're gonna show it on the patreon feed All right, this is a I you know, I get a lot of UFO video sent to me and I love it
Starting point is 00:20:22 I love every minute of it. Keep them keep them coming. I love everybody. I love your orbs I love your orbs. I want to suck in your orbs, right? You're like Adam Levine. Is it Levine? Levine. Gotta see that booty Natalie and I do that Gotta see that booty You're like a pirate, but here is this video. Okay, this one's super fucking weird What's called in India? They have gated communities. They call societies It's like a what they call it kind of like how they live and so this was filmed inside of if you're in Florida It's a gated community. It's a gated. It is in India and this was filmed outside of it. I gotta say
Starting point is 00:21:04 Oh, all right, let's take a look here and then we'll play the video. Look at this, right? So, okay, I saw something. There's some people are saying that this is the reflection of the sun on what you put a fucking piece of shit Right, yeah, we got the triangle trust, right? There's something right there. Look it looks like a dick and balls, right? Are they connected perhaps don't know look at that. It's it's all kind of like plasma Right. This is the type of shit that I wonder If some of what we're seeing is just natural phenomena that we don't understand or as I have heard it Mm-hmm called the immune system of the planet Earth Look at these things. Look at these globules. You've fascinated. I am fascinated. It's three. They look to be sort of
Starting point is 00:21:49 Floating it out. They're floating the little orbs little little globular is there because there's a lot of intelligently control I don't know. There's a lot of talk right now saying that they do believe that so obviously the UAP kind of day The deluge of reports of new AP's have come a lot of times from our armed services. They've been saying a lot that are real phenomena It is all coming from our Navy or boys, right or slick wet boys out there They're all got ready to read like hard and ready to feel you need to fight any fish that comes out of the water And I think about it. I don't know why they call them Navy seals if you look at seals They're blubbery. I don't even think they're particularly violent or smooth Side stories LP O TL a gmail.com if you're a Navy seal, I'm gonna tell you Kissel's address
Starting point is 00:22:34 And I'm here. The goal is for you to see if you can they can't get it deal Kissel drum. Yeah, why are you called a seal? You fucking arf arf ball handling motherfucker, right? That's what he's saying. That's what Kissel saying the police officer Benjamin I am just saying I don't know why they called them seals I would have gone with dolphins or even for now. Do you know are you looking it up? No, he refuses No one is an acronym for what it's an acronym for oh special What is it Jack? Special ejaculate. No special. So, you know you already said it special ejaculate
Starting point is 00:23:12 asshole liquors Simple and efficient adaptation layer E seafood and eat it. No, it stands for C. Oh Oh, where did you go? Yeah, all of this? Oh, please So we have to add Me going to the back here in land You fucking piece of shit fantastic. Anyway, yes great orbs. I see the orbs. I like I guess we get back on topic Thank you. No problem. These navy men
Starting point is 00:23:40 When they're not singing and scrubbing they see these giant these big orbs or my father is a Navy man I know how it goes. Oh, I know you're there's a lot of talk that a lot of this shit is that we are seeing some form of Directed technology from another country. Mm-hmm. And that what the US government is currently doing is allowing the UAP Smoke screen to build they're allowing it to be like here on to your phones. Definitely Absolutely for certain because they don't want to talk about it might be some form of new Janies Technology coming and it is watching our boys and we don't know what it is We we don't quite understand because because in my mind
Starting point is 00:24:22 I feel like if we don't recognize it and if we don't have it right because we have the biggest military in the galaxy currently Currently well the Chinese also they're doing pretty good. Well, they have a lot of money But we don't really know what they spend it on necessarily unless we're looking at it right now But that's that's what they're saying or It's some of this stuff It's some of the you know, I'm ready for you. I know you're ready ready to punch me ready to punch me We've shells. No, no, I meant to oh, you're like, oh, no. Oh, and now you're petting me. Oh, thank you. Sorry. I'm sorry Thank you very much. Um, but they are what if they retrofitted technology they had found from UFOs
Starting point is 00:24:57 That's very possible because that's where I'm thinking that's where I my damaged brain buddy I'm picking up what you're laying down. I'm am I'm taking that amputated foot and I'm putting it right in my mouth I think that's fantastic. I'm eating what you're saying. I feel like I'm there's there's something too that like I still feel like that there's something in a hangar somewhere that can go up and down left and right and they kind of slowly They don't know how to do it's like an independence day, which is why that's a Psyop and Really gay Jamming oh Okay, culture jamming and that all that is showing that there is they they have maybe some rudimentary understanding of the technology
Starting point is 00:25:38 But they don't fully know it but maybe you know certain world governments have funneled a lot more money Into like how do we get this thing to float and like go over there? And we go like hello and then like and all of our Navy guys go like god damn it God damn it Wilson quit scrubbing those my asshole So you're saying that we're cucks. We are we are military equipment. No, no, we don't we just watch No, no US government. Don't ever malign them. We can blow so much fucking shit up And if we got into a land where with China will win, but you're great You guys are all like this. You just want more a lot of we got plenty of funding. We're gonna kill them
Starting point is 00:26:21 They're not money. It's about the about power and the amount of people that they have over there And then they don't care if they all die and then anyway care if they die Well, that's tough to say I was actually just I feel like we just accidentally wandered into like super controversial waters No, I don't think so international waters just reading something about Some of the apartment comp they call them by the tombs or the casket houses Anyway, it's bad There's a lot of people there and there's not a lot of space to go around what I'm saying in here is this when it comes to
Starting point is 00:26:55 Ukraine Ukraine That is the battlefield that's been very interesting because they're bringing their new toys out I know there's been a lot of sightings. We got to use them. We've got to use them They're just sitting in a fucking hangar. Well, let's come back to America. Let's come back to a little bit more Let's up to 40 40,000 minks I know these have been loose in van vert county. No, so isn't that exciting? So this is just about a go tell us minks loose minks now This they're saying this might be an act of eco terrorism
Starting point is 00:27:25 Oh, they say 25,000 to 40,000 minks from the lion farms USA mink farm Hoagland township. We're released overnight. Oh, look at that little mink now This is kind of look at this. This is how you know, it's my algorithm I typed in minks, right? And the first thing it pops up and says, what does mink taste like? Oh All right, here we go. This is on Reddit going to try cook mink meat. What does it taste like? Can't imagine it's good All right. All right, so apparently yeah, some some carnivores because it's a carnivore, right? There's some bio magnification. I guess it's like they could be toxic to eat Well, maybe you don't eat them people seem to wear them a little bit more
Starting point is 00:28:07 You're supposed to skin them or whatever, but then my question is why can't you just shave them? Why do you have to take all I guess the skin is what holds all the hair together? Why do you have to kill them to use them? Well, one of the problems here? I don't know one of the problems with this idea here. This is from elf That's the animal liberation front there. We've heard about them forever They say that they so they released all these animals, right? But the thing about the mink is it just kills. It's apparently quite violent Yes, and it kills a bunch of poultry and stuff. So I think what they did basically was just
Starting point is 00:28:38 Unleash 40,000 Violent so the chickens are like could have released does I'm chicken because now these makes are just gonna go I'm I'm chicken, but now these makes are just gonna go run rough shot over how many animals who knows But anyway, they're very territorial. They are they're saying this if human use is a reason for fire health concerns Um, they can oh, you oh, that is great. They can also spread COVID-19. They can yeah, they're one of those They can be infected with coronaviruses. Oh, but I guess they bite you. I bet they give it to you bite you. Oh Yeah, it says right here Because we gave them the largest producer of mink fur in Denmark had a COVID-19 outbreak from a mink farm
Starting point is 00:29:24 Really? Yeah, all these sick-ass minks. Whoa Whoa, mama. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's not good. I don't like this But also at the same time free the minks, I guess are like keep the minks Well, they do look cute. You're not supposed to eat them. Apparently people are saying it's not very tasty Which is to me the biggest crime of all I think they're I think they would be cat classified as sort of like a pest sort of but that's vanverk county So let us know here. You see any minks out there. I can't find anything on eating mink Meat is meat is meat my book unless it's a puffer fish or something crazy like that
Starting point is 00:29:56 But I'm wondering why I haven't heard of something eating it. All right. I've heard of you eating yotes. I'm not mink. So how's it? I have one in the freezer. All right. All right. Hey cook it up. Let's know jet Wait a second. There's no grocery stores. You're away. That's another comment. This is on trapper man.com Trapper man. We finally made it to trapper man. There you go I've tried about everything in north america in my opinion all the mucolids, which I've never heard of It's a mucolid that I've ever tried right river otter mink martin badger wolverine They've not been particularly tasty. Stop eating them. Some are worse than others in particular mink I try the ones and only and only once not overly delectable cuisine not overly
Starting point is 00:30:38 I disagree on your statement that meat is meat on the other hand A mephitids skunks believe it or not aren't too bad. Oh, yeah Google the name chicago and see where that word came from. All right. So that's what I like now I'm gonna do that. I'm gonna say exactly said skunks Chicago. I'm looking it up Man, I that's why I love the animal kingdom You when it comes to the skunk they just adapted this fart and it's just so powerful What does the word chicago mean? Revanized flatulence. I love you got it. You can't make that stuff up
Starting point is 00:31:09 It's better than lord of the rings the most accepted chicago meaning is a word that comes from the alconquin language Chicagoa meaning stripe skunk or onion. No shit. I don't know why Well, that explains why does it mean onion? That explains why they like to have their hot dogs the way that they do full of peppers and onions and all the And mustard and if you even think about putting ketchup on a chicago dog They'll kill you apparently it's because of the wild garlic that used to grow there And they could smell the farty lands of chicacoa for as long as the man had nose. No kidding That's incredible and I guess they're eating they're eating fucking skunk
Starting point is 00:31:47 So that I think is the first time in human history that anyone has actually learned anything from a comment on the internet very nice My goal is to remember I think it's remember especially now with like the chaos that's happening at twitter Follow all this whatever right we got to remember the internet's not just for fucking website stock, right? The internet is infinite go to trapper man.com. Absolutely. Go to trapper man.com and make trapper man.com your twitter Because find your find your fucking your your community the crankers, right sure how many emails we got our crankers You know how many people said straight up they love cranking about seven. Yes, but seven seven people that I mean I don't necessarily need to meet
Starting point is 00:32:30 In person. Well, this is why this is nice. We do a Q&A now At the end of our show not so much. I'm eating great, but it's great But like, you know find it make cranking times.com your twitter the internet is infinite just go someplace else You know who also but you know who found out the infinite the internet was actually a smaller town than you wanted to do Who's that wanted was it a man by the name of nicolas alivarian? Now nicolas alivarian if you look into him at all Oh, he's a he's a funny little guy alivarian. Um, he is a uh, he's a piece of shit That uh, was a sex fender. He was committed in 2000
Starting point is 00:33:08 He was convicted of sexual assault in 2008 for pinning a woman against a wall masturbating on her and he said Hey, don't be a bitch, right? Which is like not the way how you date, right? And so he was named a sex offender and then he became sort of this Face of essentially like incel culture for a little bit on the internet He fancied himself also a human rights activist because he was raised in a facility known as the DC yf which is the department of children youth and families This is uh in the states of florida and nebraska because he was born in nebraska. Okay And so he was saying he received all these like horrible treatment as a little kid and these like foster systems
Starting point is 00:33:46 blah blah blah But um, there are a lot of people that are now alleged that actually he was taken from his parents and put into foster care And there's a lot of people that are now saying that well it actually was Not just he his parents could no longer raise him due to his being a A How do you say not a great kid? It was a trouble maker. It was a troubled kid. It was a troubled kid And uh, he couldn't work his way through his family. I don't feel like it's when you're a kid It's different, but it's what he grew into which was obviously um, he campaigned for pence
Starting point is 00:34:16 Um, or immediately like a full like republican thing, but they have just found him Uh, they found him in scotland. So he faked his own death He faked his own death saying that he died courageously of cancer and wrote his own obituary. Yeah, how'd that go? It was kind of nice to be able to write your own obituary and see people react and then you're like, it's all fake Who's sad? Who's not sad? This is the beginning paragraphs of his obituary in 2020 He said that he died of cancer, right? Nicholas Oliverian's battle for life ended on february 29th 2020 The children and families and the care of the road island apartment of children youth and families
Starting point is 00:34:51 For whom he inspired and led through turbulent government Transcussions have lost a warrior that fought on the front lines for two decades He died going public two months after going public with his diagnosis of non hudgkin lymphoma He was in his 32nd year at his bedside where mrs. Oliverian who doesn't exist There are two children who don't exist an extended family his last words were Fear not and run toward the bliss of the sun They were at the time Your last words again are you got the password?
Starting point is 00:35:22 Those words last words are free man perhaps the room was filled with the sounds of the end credits for the 1997 film contact By composer Alan silvestry a film and score which held special meaning for mr. Oliverian No one cares also contact. It's a fine movie. Oh my god. It's all static for 48 hours. I get it It's great. She went through a lot of fucking bullshit to go meet her father. Also. How expensive was it? I think about the tax dollars. Oh, absolutely. But the key is is that they found him in scotland So I was wrong. So he was from rhoda island like these are I guess that specific foster care system covers several states, right? But once he lost all the shit like once he got kicked out of like the harvard online schools classes that he was taking for being a Sex offender without telling a bunch of people
Starting point is 00:36:13 He then had several restraining orders putting against him especially against his first wife Who said that uh, he was violent and then he had several sexual assault allegations that followed him So he faked his own death to get away from all that shit. Okay, and they found him in scotland under the name of alan night In glad good nice. And he guess what he was in the hospital for he was on a ventilator for kovat So they fucking got him which has got to be one of my favorite arrest scenarios Where it's just because he's this like he thinks he's this maverick You know like, you know, nobody can contain him and shit and then you catch him on an oxygen tank That's fucking fun to be able to just like arrest him right there at the bed. Gotcha. Gotcha. Got you. No
Starting point is 00:36:56 No, she was like got you bitch. Well, he wouldn't he really went way too far in on the obituary No one's obituary is that self-serving in a way. They're almost Annoying things that family members have to do when you pass. Yes Uh in order to get the insurance money so that no one thinks that they actually killed you This is just he's one of those like minor villains that I love to like get obsessed with like the other person that I got Obsessed with this week was sarah boon Um, who was I dreading was a true crime, uh, youtube channel. I watched a video on you watch that too It's it's fascinating where she killed her alcohol
Starting point is 00:37:32 She is a raging alcohol alcoholic who killed her alcoholic boyfriend by zipping him up in a suitcase and letting him just like Choked to death in there. How'd that go? It's uh, not good, but she did not even know you should watch the her Interrogation footage. It's very compelling. All right. Well the story that I'd like to bring to life is a little bit more about love Oh, yeah, I know because you always you're always talking about love talking about love tsa No matter where you are, it can be a little prickly Australia especially Drugs not so much. You've tried to even look at a fucking grape. Oh, you don't arrest your ass. You better not have had a sunflower seed That came from Los Angeles that arrives in Australia. You go to big time. You got a dandelion in your butthole
Starting point is 00:38:16 You're done 25 years to life in Australia. They're very protective. It's an island. Sure. Sure. There's a gal She got 4.9 million views on her tiktok because she was detained After having a butt plug that contained her boyfriend's ashes Well, how are ashes? How do ashes hurt the environment? I don't know. But the reason that she has her Boyfriend's ex obviously he's deceased. Yeah, they loved each other And the reason she has his ashes in this butt plug is because quote it was his favorite place I mean in her butthole. I so isn't that nice that Natalie has the same discipline Yes, when I die that she couldn't just at my urn
Starting point is 00:38:53 She rubs her titties on the urn sure every day and she knows this I've asked her about this and she also says like with your perspective women that she's allowed to be with after My passing because she's allowed to be a lesbian after because I'll watch from the sky I'll watch from from fucking the urn Hopefully yeah, and then you just like just show me the titties every once in a while Just know that I'll bring good luck. You're gonna want to have a window then on your urn there And maybe just if they could keep your eyeballs I
Starting point is 00:39:20 How do you keep the eyeballs floating in there? So that would be kind of nice so you could see them But the thing about this is this woman she you know when you fly you get nervous I sometimes do yeah And so sometimes you have to do things that that are comforting only show you and maybe people will say sure weird like Why is Ben having eight jamesons before he flies? That's what you're saying that that's a little ritual. I'm relaxing No, you have to call this drinking alcohol, but that's a rich relaxing This woman was where they say wearing the butt plug which means the butt plug was inside of her And as she went through security and then she says I explained what it was
Starting point is 00:39:53 But there was a lady worker in earshot of that conversation Which led to some back and forth between us and the male officials. She doesn't she just never had anybody that she would wear a Peron butt ever for she's lonely and she says the male guy did not like the vulgarity She was using to explain the butt plug when she was just explaining. What do you want? He's trying to make she's trying to make you warning. She's a young gal. She's very cute I put something up her butt. Who cares? She's up her butt. She's not trying to put it up your butt, but Literally because of all of this the airport security. There's a whole group of people. They got their passports They got their phones
Starting point is 00:40:29 They did this like she was smuggling a whole bunch of crystal methamphetamine or a group of children inside of her Instead of just being like all right got it. Give me the butt plug and get out of here or just let her have it What's the problem here? Yeah, honestly like like I guess I just even know I guess they found it the metal detector I guess there was a little bit inside of her. She went through the system She went through the scanner and then there's like there's something in your arrectum. There's something in your arrectum I actually feel like in a way Ah
Starting point is 00:40:58 she Maybe this might be on a limb here. It feels like she like the attention Of this incident a little bit and that because in my mind what I would do is because I know that the security system is a little invasive If I had a butt plug of Natalie and I wanted to take it through I probably would not apply it to myself Until I was in the lounge Well, of course when you're packing you have to pack a lot Especially if you're going on a foreign trip and so perhaps she just wanted to save a little room in her briefcase
Starting point is 00:41:29 I mean it's well put it in the human briefcase, which is the butthole or the vagina So she claims an hour later after being detained a big official came and had to sign a super long foreign document And said if we went outside of the airport doors, we'd go to jail. What then she says it was a long day It's just she'd go back to America. Well, uh, I'm not quite exactly sure what happened to her I say like again, it's up her butt And I don't know what there is you but you are trying tsa That's the thing too. They're the ones making the rules So you got to figure out how to negotiate that shit right there and you have to figure out
Starting point is 00:42:06 You got to you got a code switch and figure out who's too lonely to understand this because that one woman You all you do all's again. You start crying. Yep. You can always start crying. I'm not sure if they're gonna really care Where she's at there Um, so anyway, a lot of people had some jokes to make they say Oh, I'm carrying your love with me and then one person said everyone grieves differently and it's okay to grieve privately Just saying I feel that she knew she was gonna get stand for scan for security and it's a metal I don't know. It's not a metal butt plug. We don't know if it's a metal butt plug or not I'm just saying
Starting point is 00:42:40 You should have it inside you but when you don't have to go through a metal detector It's because then you don't have to deal with all of this and then you can continue the morning and then have little butt Orgasms all day She has taken her former partner's ashes on big adventures She has said my life has changed a lot and I wish she was here to see it But I'm glad to take him with me to places like the great barrier reef and concerts of bands He loves we're going to see bring me the horizon in December Everywhere she goes she's got her butt plug in
Starting point is 00:43:11 Do you think that he'd think it's a threesome if he's inside of her as a ghost right with the butt plug But then she's still having sex with somebody else on top of while the butt plug is inside of her. Yeah Is that a threesome? Well, I'm just not really sure Interestingly enough sarah's boyfriend had bought her this item as a gag gift And she says we lost touch for a little while and during that time he passed And unbeknownst to me. Oh, so they had already broken. I don't know He knew he was passing and had it in a box and I received it at his funeral Honestly, it's the funniest thing he's ever done. I'll spend my whole life laughing about it
Starting point is 00:43:47 Which really is crying. This is an interesting woman Yeah, so I do think perhaps They did have something going on and it was a joke But and that was a joke that could land her in very serious jail and how to have we found it's two stories this week That's two stories about bets because sending you to 92 years worth of jail. Yeah, um, absolutely We have another story that is unfolding that we're going to cover more as the details come up because it's very mysterious but these four kids one was a member of fraternity three were members of sorority They were found brutally stabbed to death in a home that well
Starting point is 00:44:22 Well, basically someone called the cop saying that they said someone was passed out on the inside They walked in they were found at noon on a sunday They'd all been brutally stabbed to death with something called a knife-like object Sounds like a knife you say it's a knife, uh, but we don't know there's no other suspects But it's just this really strange like How does it they're saying it's not a murder suicide? They believe it's a homicide But it's like the idea of four people versus one they have no clue what happened There's some kind of speculation that they all came for money. Maybe there was some kind of like weird ransom thing going on
Starting point is 00:44:53 Or you are going to rob anybody don't rob college kids. They're broke. They have nothing. Have money This is their rum springer where their parents say you go live on your own And sure they might get two grand a month or whatever in an allowance, but they're still going to be spending it It's all gone shitty booze and alcohol. So the Moscow. This is in Moscow, Idaho So interestingly enough, so it's very sad two 20 year olds two 21 year olds taking way too young. We have no idea No, we'll keep you updated Yeah, that's one of those we're gonna just follow because it is very very mysterious I mean, this is the closest thing we've seen to a Ted Bundy-like massacre or Richard very similar to Richard Speck
Starting point is 00:45:36 So yeah a big old mass murder, which is kind of it's very interesting to have. I'm very interesting But it's one of those where it's like, but how do you do that? Like how does one versus four work? Absolutely. So maybe somebody they knew Uh, perhaps. All right. Just lastly people were vacationing in Acapulco I've heard of that. Did you hear about this story? No And then so they're all hanging out at the beach and then three bodies Just showed up and they were all fucked up and then the pictures of the people They're just at the beach, but then the body is just there. Oh, yeah
Starting point is 00:46:08 And I mean you paid for that swimming. Hey, man, if you paid for that resort I'll just be like, oh, it must be a bunch of towels and just keep moving on because I am just not I am not Ending my vacation Last because we are here. It is Acapulco. We're having fun. Damn it Last year the u.s. State department issued a do not travel advisory, which I did not know Over 120 murders were recorded in Acapulco in the first four months of this year alone. It's very beautiful place though Not it is beautiful. But oh man Whoa, apparently kidnapping is really on the rise
Starting point is 00:46:44 Um, so I just remember Acapulco from like like old movies. No, yeah me too. Yeah, it seems nice Yeah, like it seems like some fun place, you know, like very relaxing. It's like old school or some shit Yeah, the the bodies all the corpses were full of bullets So that they didn't uh, they didn't survive there. No, no, that's not good. No, no, no Maybe they fell on them. Yeah, maybe they tripped and fell on the ball the bullet I just you know, I don't know how the He's trying to have a nice vacation. You know, you know, they found nothing but true nothing but true Hi, I'm Jackie Zabrowski and I'm MJ and I'm holding from the page seven podcast and we're going on
Starting point is 00:47:27 That's right. We're touring all up in this motherfucking country a fake cursing So whatever Jackie just say the filthy f word already and we will say the filthy f word when we come to your town That's right. We're coming to texas the midwest the northeast and then right back here in galley, baby For ticket links and more details visit last podcast network dot com. That's right last podcast network dot com H7 and wizard and the bruiser present Release the butthole cut wait, that's really what we're calling the tour Absolutely, release the butthole cut for more information. Go to last podcast network dot com All right, everyone it's time for hero of the week
Starting point is 00:48:10 This week's hero of the week It's not the guy that ate the 40 rotisserie chickens in 40 days I don't really understand why he's a hero because he ate the chickens Yeah, but I mean people just do that people do that all the time No, because it's actually very bad for you because of the salt Oh, okay in the chickens, but that guy did it because of something else But now he's saying he'll never eat meat again. So congratulations. I mean you already you can't just be like I killed 40 people I'm never gonna kill again. I mean now you're a hero
Starting point is 00:48:37 Are you why are you comparing murder to eat rotisserie chickens rotisserie chickens? Have a good time with it? I'm just saying I don't think you want to be hero. However. What is hero? A sandwich hero. It's a sandwich. Um, this is gonna be heroes are seen as lovely son A hero Cans of pumpkin now cans of pumpkin are hero of the week So basically I'm not taking the bait. You said that this was gonna really make me upset, but I'm I feel nothing A mom claims pumpkin helps save her dog's life as veterinarians were stunned By the miraculous recovery from this dog who had terminal cancer
Starting point is 00:49:16 He was given 12 months to live the dog's name is coda and sure enough 12 months is like the eighth of a dog's life Yeah, you know what I mean? That's a long time. It's not like humans where like a year to live is really kind of Like it's it's tragically short where that's actually a very long chunk for a dog. He had intestinal cancer But the the mom she was a retired teacher. She was like, what if we give him a bunch of canned pumpkin? and they did And so he lost some weight during it's the mom who's the hero? No, because the mom or the mom is what fed the dog pumpkin coda gobbled up the pumpkin Which is rich in vitamin a and c and it helps build the beauty was in a immune system
Starting point is 00:49:58 No, the pumpkin was just present the canned pumpkin is hero of the week So they say we're just trying to think of anything that could help boost his health that that would benefit without giving him the pumpkins There's a higher chance. He would have died. Why he'd become such a part of our family We just do why though. Why was the because you fuck because it is because it was it has a and c vitamins So there's a lot of shit. Yeah, but they but the a and c vitamins. How does that help against cancer? Well, it helped build the boost the immune system for coda. So he lives for how much longer. He's still alive How long ago did he get the year-long diagnosis in 2019? I guess it must be the fucking it was the goddamn pumpkin. I also just don't understand because again
Starting point is 00:50:44 It's the woman who chose the pumpkin. It's not if the pumpkin was alive. It said Then the pumpkin is number one a miracle Uh-huh and that should be in the Smithsonian. That's what they're calling it miraculous The oncologist did the scan. It was shocked because it's an incredibly rare aggressive form of cancer and chemotherapy is usually not effective, but In this case, it was Coda still munches on the well. He was still doing chemotherapy. Yeah So coda still munches on some pumpkin. Oh three times a day to keep in tip top condition. I can't pumpkin I think it's here in the week the chemo. No, the chemo usually doesn't help
Starting point is 00:51:23 It was because of the pumpkin And that interest in so you want this you like this ladies and gentlemen. That's what they like to hear I'm happy with it can pumpkin for the for coda the dog And uh, just you know dogs are part of your family too. I absolutely and I'm gonna start eating pumpkin today All right, I'm doing it the old way. I'm fucking asshole. It's rich in vitamin a and c Actually, I had pumpkin out too long ago. Fantastic. Um, now here's some uh, listen emails up This one is uh, I've been saving for this. I've been saving this and this was sent to me by a very smart listener And I'm just gonna float this out there and I'd love to see what comes back
Starting point is 00:51:59 I did a little bit of research on it, but I will see right because I want to see if I get any other proof so in 2002 An investigation was launched into the 1977 to 1981 Canadian television show leo and me I thought you're about a camp lejeune again. No, no camp lejeune is bad, dude All those emails and people are drinking jet fuel or something. I don't want to go to camp lejeune I know I kind of want some of that money though in a way. We weren't we're not old enough No, now, um, there's a television leon mean now what they said was an usual cluster
Starting point is 00:52:34 Of parkinson's disease cases that were noted among former cast and crew members of the show weird Now one of those members of that show was michael j fox michael j fox And fought and four other people were diagnosed with parkinson's after all being on that show cast and connective don't know Michael j fox. They said they there was an initial investigation into it and there's on the howard stern show and he apparently came forward There was a little howard stern show did the investigation. No, no, no, no, he talked about that. They did an investigation because they researched this They said this is weird thing because they would just send high-pitched eric out to Um, but they said that uh
Starting point is 00:53:19 Uh, normally the incidence of parkinson's in society is about one in 300, but wow that's actually higher than I thought right and then But on this set four out of the 125 people came out saying they had parkinson's right Her other advanced disease, right? So you didn't know what was going on. Now this this was set in vancouver. This was where it was shot It was shot in vancouver and the hills outside of vancouver. Now. What do we know about this time period, right? So it's like, I don't know. Oh, I know what we know about this time period. It's 1977 to 1981 Right, there was you know, who knows right because it was an indie television. Who knows right, right? So well, let me wind it all around right now. There's some sort of there's a strong evidence
Starting point is 00:54:01 saying they believe That parkinson's disease is caused by a prion Right now prion is like a rogue protein inside of your body and a lot of prions Like, you know, sometimes what they do believe is that maybe the gut Makes it and then it replicates it again and again and that's where parkinson comes from It's like a genetic mutation and then things get fucked up, right? But they also believe that you could potentially consume a prion, which is why like or a bad prion like what we did with Matt cow's disease. Oh, yeah, blame it on the cows. Why don't you?
Starting point is 00:54:35 Right, so they're saying that like maybe you could eat it, right? Maybe there's something you can eat it and you can eat the thing and you can get into your body because some prions can survive the All the digestive juices inside of you can leave and work its way in your skin That's how you get mad mad cow disease They're saying that maybe parkinson's could possibly be one of those diseases that maybe there's like it can be spread in that way And so looks like you have grumpy pig disease That's what my wife calls me um
Starting point is 00:55:05 At the time period, um, there was a certain man that was active in this area Willie Picton Robert Picton that we know was selling Pigs to be consumed In this area of the world and at this time period. So there is this new conspiracy theory floating That may be on this set Robert Picton Murdered a sex worker that had some early signs of Parkinson's without knowing it fed that to a fed her to a pig
Starting point is 00:55:39 The pig then got the prion inside of its body And then it was sold to the cast and crew like the catering company of a move of a tv show Leo and me that meet and that they all ate it and got parkinson's from that is now fucking crazy It is absolutely crazy with the crate one of the crazier components is the idea that craft services would have a bratwurst or a hot dog Of course rarely see it. Honestly, that's where I used to miss. That's why I miss most about working on Atlanta Is that like oh, yeah, sometimes those catering companies. They do work out of the side of their own homes, right? It's just a mama like do making those foods. It's like, yeah And so like
Starting point is 00:56:15 Who knows where they get the meat from because technically that's fresh ass meat Yeah In real life if that wasn't filled with sex worker meat in the belly of the pig Sure, that's the nicest pig meat you can get because it's right down the either right down the way You know pet the pig going stroke it off and make it nice and happy before you slit it I don't want to do that. I'm just saying like that's like as good as it gets So there you go picked it might have one more Casualty to the list. Oh, yes. It is fucking is that crazy? It's disgusting. Very scary. Um ladies and gentlemen, we're announcing here
Starting point is 00:56:49 We have availability for work here at lpn Wow, we need is you were los angeles resident Are you even remotely close to los angeles and willing to come here or not even honestly? It's better if you live here Yeah, um email lpn editor email at gmail.com because we are looking for a podcast editor Right here sending your resumes We need it As a part of the last podcast network family absolutely putting the uncle and uncle sam Okay, everyone will thank you all so much for listening again. We'll see you in indianapolis. We'll see you in grand rap
Starting point is 00:57:23 It's apparently it's cold as a witch's booby. I am Looking forward to the temperature But I'm looking for mostly will be inside and then when we're outside We'll have our little inside sweater, which is tequila live your day every day knowing that one day You're gonna end up on that slab, right? And all you're gonna end up when you're in that morgue when you're in that hospice So you're gonna be a bunch of people who are looking to be looking at you like you are a fucking Like a 10 like your bow Derek. I think they're looking at you like a junkyard and they're waiting to scrap you
Starting point is 00:57:54 Right, they're trying to take those pieces out of you, right? So what you got to do is love living an unhealthy lifestyle in the last year of your life, right? Oh, you lead up to that you got to do you want to ruin those organs ruin those feet, right? Because then when they come to fucking take when that nurse was horny to turn you into a funny little bit for her like The roadside taxidermy fucking like place. Absolutely. She won't be able to get anything usable out of you And then you can laugh your way all the way down to hell as you're watching her struggle with your mangled-ass fucking non-pedicured feet Oh god, that's gonna be rough. Make your feet
Starting point is 00:58:27 Unwantable for the feet market. Well, just like whaling Jennings. He went to the grave without feet Um, all right, everyone. Thank you for listening hell yourself. I'll say those magustillations everyone See y'all said This show is made possible by listeners like you Thanks to our ad sponsors You can support our shows by supporting them for more shows like the one you just listened to go to last podcast network.com

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