Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: Pizza Problems

Episode Date: November 27, 2024

Henry & Eddie serve up this week's weirdest stories and true-crime news, piping hot, fresh out the oven - starting with a quick recap of the boy's recent Humbolt weed-venture, a big RIP to Keto the Killer Whale, Lyle Menendez caught up in bizarre love triangle behind bars, a congressional UAP update, disgruntled Seattle woman murders 67-year-old father on election night, a violent outburst at a Virginia Mod Pizza leaves one worker disemboweled, Listener E-Mails, and MORE! Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ on Apple Podcasts to listen to ad-free new episodes and get exclusive access to bonus content.

There's no place to escape to, this is the Lost Talk. On the left. Sign stories? That's when the cannibalism started. SIGN STORIES! Yes. That's too bad. I'm already dead. I'm already dead. I'm a I am already dead I'm already dead

I'm a dead man. What should I bring to Thanksgiving dead man walking dead man walking if you were I'm gonna say if you're going to Thanksgiving this year good thing to maybe bring for the whole family is those dental dams Oh, yeah, I teach your family and use dental dams this Thanksgiving. You're right. You're right Cuz it's been so I've never used one one I've never seen one you can use them Practically for to go, you know for leftovers. I think that's a great great piece of advice I didn't jam it in your wife, dude. I think that that's a great great idea I think also I it's a good you know what is really great about dental dams Mm-hmm is that it's really a really good way to save yourself some calories for the Thanksgiving

meal so then you get the pleasure and the taste of eating it by putting it, you put the dental dam over your face, you mush the food into the hole where your mouth is, right? And you can chew it all around and you can get the juices sliding through around the dental dam in your mouth but then you can just spit it out and that's called a safer form of bulimia Is that wrong is that wrong? imagine being like about to eat out a woman and you're like Excuse me. Let me get my hold on one second. Well, it's good to do technically we can't be angry about it You're supposed to put it over the vagina. That is the most graphic picture Rob to start today with oh man

That is why I'm giving well, we are really happy things. I just postponed my dentist appointment. Hey Yeah, dr. Dr. Reeve have any extra dental dance. I think my south mouth has a cavity You know what's going on welcome to side stories. I'm Henry Well, yeah He called out his actual dentist who does listen to the show. I had no idea that what a dental dam was. I'm not even frowning against the use of dental dams. I think you should if you're, if you've got, if you got the fucking old school gangster bumps. Yeah. You need to use them on the mouth or you got them on

yourself mouth. Fucking wrap it up. Damn it up You just that you I heard if you just throw it like a frisbee. It just attaches sticks That's if you get a wet first. That's why four plays extremely important that we do eight play That is an R. Kelly bit is it? Yeah 12 play is this oh, well, I don't go that far Is it yeah 12 play was a song. Oh, well, I don't go that far He could have calmed some of that down I guess yeah, yeah definitely at least nine play I mean let's con seven play He's too Randy Well, we're gonna be in Brooklyn. We are we are gonna be in Brooklyn next week Kings Theater Kings Theater on December 7th last podcast on the left It's gonna be so much fun. We still got that place is gigantic

It's we still got like a million we've sold 2,000 tickets and there's still so many tickets So if you're there come hang out, which we're gonna have a wild we're gonna have a blast All of our friends are gonna be there We're gonna be hanging out over the year around the blast and then Philly's completely sold out so you can't see it Yeah, so yeah, but also we're gonna be here in LA on the 21st of December welcome come see Night out it's gonna be a lot of fun. I got some good bookings. I just booked Blair Sochi. It's very very thick I think I accidentally also booked another person as well. We got a stack show We really do not to combine acts or something

We're gonna figure something out, but it's gonna be a hell of a barn burner Come on down December 21st at the Masonic Lodge in Los Angeles at the Hollywood Forever Cemetery. And the last one, last one is January 11th. We're gonna be in Atlanta at the Coca-Cola Roxy. I can't wait for that show. I've never been to Atlanta other than to see Tom Petty and he's fucking dead. Dude, we are gonna go to Gun Show.

Gun Show? Gun Show's my favorite restaurant. Almost one of my favorite restaurants in the country. Really? It's wonderful's wonderful all right there's a bunch of stuff we're gonna go do i want to go to gun show if you're hearing this kevin glassby i know you listen sometimes we need a a rezi by the way a lot of people hit me up and said you're full of shit about the varsity they are wrong themselves said that you're a fucking idiot i've been going to atlanta for a dozen years i've eaten at varsity the fucking best it's're a fucking idiot. I've been going to Atlanta for a dozen years. I've eaten at varsity. They're like the varsity is the fucking best. It's not. You're a fucking dum-dum. You are incorrect. You're a shit head, poo poo brain. Varsity is for drunk college kids.

And there's other things to do. But there's, I mean, it can take you better place. I bet I can better, if you can give me a better hot dog. We're not eating. Cause I got hot dog on the brain now. Eat it now it before we go dodger dogs are better Just eat no, I know they changed they changed the Dodger dog. It doesn't matter all right I'm gonna take it better places. I promise you I mean take a better place I'm a fucking hot dog speaking of places. We've been to we just came back from Humboldt County and boy are my dreams tired Yeah, man We want to give a big, big old thank you widespread

panic. We want to give a big thank you to Ridgeline farms and Huckleberry hill farms. Yes. Johnny, Johnny, Sally, dude, what a bad motherfucker. Also a Matoly Valley, sun grown also bad-ass with Dylan over there. We just just straight up. We learned a lot We went and did a little but you know, we didn't just smoke weed and do dumb stuff We got a full-on show with an amazing crowd. Maybe my favorite show We did all year three to what we had we sold 320 tickets in the middle of fucking nowhere It was the restaurant we had a blast in a liquor store. That is very scary It looked like a level from Silent Hill 2. It's just like we're the only place in town with liquor, good luck fighting another place with liquor.

Humble. This is what it looks like. It was seven in there. Oh yeah, it is still like literally it is the group, the group of most friendly murderers I've ever met. Yeah. And they were wonderful, thank you guys so much, but we have learned a lot about the plight of the small farmer Yeah, if you go out there and you see huckleberry hill farms when you're at your dispensary If you're lucky enough to get we were very fortunate to get in there I doubt anyone could just walk in if you go into a dispensary and you see ridgeline or huckleberry hill farms But holy Valley sungrove you buy that shit. I'm on outdoor weed now. It's the best. I never thought that that was going to happen to me.

I thought I was indoor forever with all the crazy, it's much better outdoor. We were smoking it and we never smoked before shows. No. And we got, we had to like show the growers we were cool. And so we're like, all right, you know, we'll hit it. And then man, first of all, the farmer joints. They call them growers joints. They are the size of quarters. Why does a quarter? It's amazing. The entire paper and I have no, and it

stays perfect. No idea how they know how they do it. Just generations of having their, their, with their fingers, roll joints and grow weed. Yeah. But they, this like we talked to like at Huckleberry hill farms, this is like a generational farm. It was really amazing. We have no ties to the monetarily. We don't really, but they like talking about how like my father used to have to farm for weed with an AK 47 on his back and now he's sitting there in the full merch. So it is a wild, like it really has been a long, strange trip that those guys have been on because it is fucking it just turned legal there Yeah, essentially. Yeah, it's hard for them because they used to make so much more money when it was illegal

Yes Yeah And like everyone's wearing shirts They say keep weed illegal and I guess I didn't catch that at first and at one point during ourselves like man I love that weeds legal now people free I love that weeds legal now people free Yeah, we got booze Yeah, people got booze I was taking it out of a hole and I was like oh shit

But it was great though honestly We learned a fuck ton and it was just what a fucking great trip We can't wait to go back I know that Henry has gone completely weed crazy I We got a lot, they gave us a lot of weed Every moment More than we've had in a very long time

Yes, every moment that I'm sitting here at fucking work on Wednesday before Thanksgiving All I want to be usually when we prep for the show, it's casual and she's like, can we just fucking get in there? Can we I'm gonna get back to my blueberry caviar that is sitting in my home I know I get it stuff. It's so good. By the way, you didn't give me a blueberry caviar You only gave me the black caviar two jars of black caviar It's the same. I was supposed to know what's blueberry. I'll give you the other one It's good. I'll give it to you. All right, we'll switch see this what happens is tearing our friendship apart No, no, I was explaining this to Eddie. I think weed is the thing. I'm the greediest over like money. I don't care other shit

I don't care but like weed I'm like that's awesome. What lamb you get crazy around lamb The meat yeah, well, I like I like lamb. Yeah, I share lamb. I share Yeah, but but still I'm like smoke. I keep my weed, I'm like, yes, yes, precious. Do you have any in your, I put some in my freezer to keep it good longer so I can smoke it next year. Actually, I didn't even think about that. I probably should. Yeah.

Does it work like that? I don't know, it's what we used to do when I was growing or selling, so I imagine that's what you should do. They said at least don't let it get hot. Yeah, don't let it get hot. That's the main thing, it needs to be temperate Yeah, what's the winner? We're good. Well, thank you guys. Thank you. I'll thank you everybody

Who came out the material community center? What a cool place to see a show if you go on their website and you just find a show that looks cool Go there the vacation the Redwoods are unbelievable. It's an amazing town. It should be a tourist destination It should be it's just extremely difficult to get to yes And so that is why it probably isn't yet But also don't you know like let's roll in there because they don't get quite the infrastructure yet for the amount of tourists That should be there Yeah

But one day and maybe that's where people could put some money because that's what it needs it needs a couple of pharmacies Yeah, it could be a couple of coffee shops in there build it. They will come Yep, come and they will build it come and I and I'll Go there. Yeah come and I'm coming and coming and it will be stuck to your leg come and I'm covered in come Let's get into some stories Think that's the plug they wanted. Yep Come you'll be covered and come then nothing they like better We got a couple updates I do have a couple updates number one

Update was I thought that did make me laugh quite a bit was the we talked about at the end of last week's episode About the naked doctor that has done a bunch of fucked up stuff to his employees Was named dr. Dr. Define. He, before his nudity problems, he was instructed by an HOA, his HOA of where his home was, to remove a bush that was obstructing a stop sign. So what he did was he removed the bush and then put in its place a giant rooster

with two giant balls in front of it. And he says- Oh, these roosters have balls. No, you see, but it's a funny play upon the fact that he said, you see what happens is when I shaved my bush You see my dick and balls. Oh cock and balls fun guy. Yes. Yes. Yes He's a funny guy. And so he did this the entire town actually kind of likes it. Yeah Well, I mean, how do you not they kind of like you think it's funny, but this is before it's not

Anatomically, correct. No, no, no, it doesn't have it. It's like it's a rooster that has two literal like basketball things in front of it Oh, okay, so it's not attached to it. He's doing it. Like it's funny. It's truly cheeky So now they want to get rid of it because he's a predator. Well, this is like last year This is just more of a this is what this kind of guy Do we have to find a new home for this cock and balls? I put to be honest I think that's most innocent thing about him. Yeah. Oh for sure. It's what he got. He's a he's a Cock and balls. There's no question. He definitely loves his own. He definitely loves his own but apparently it really was a long-term Abuse like situation in that house, which is really really I'm glad they got him

And then what other up one less doctor in the street? Yeah, I fucking sick at these fucking doctors running around Everywhere. What are they? What's the other big update? Well the big I mean for me. Oh, yes You have a huge update Kato the whale Kato the killer whale has died in Spain at the Tenerife Zoo If you remember Kato in a reef Tenerife, mm-hmm. You've been there. No, I just know it's miss. Okay Okay, no was remember he was featured in part two of the horrors of SeaWorld series He was the orca that killed trainer Alexis Martinez on Christmas Eve 2009 at Loro Parque and

Yeah, it was a was a you bit him He bit him he rammed him against the concrete and stuff. Kato had a very had a 29 year old Rough life. Yeah, he was like I didn't know that he was forced to sleep with his cousin Yes, they all are kind of but he said specifically it was like an incestuous thing that really shouldn't happen Then he was fucking his cousin for a while I mean like, you know, if you're not choosing to fuck your cousin I think that's even worse when you're in a cell with only your cousin Well, you know, I would automatically fuck my cousin just because I'm in a cell with her. No, I'm not saying you maybe an animal though

Yeah, I guess but you'd probably do it. Anyway, so My cousins are all men. Yeah, Kato was born in SeaWorld lived his entire life in captivity and spent It was sold overseas and in the wild we know a male can live up to 60 years old and Kato had a very rough life And is necropsy was taken care of by 21 vets I believe geez really just all in one go Well, they all took different parts of them. Well, you have to cut them up because you can't just take a 6600 pound whale just toss them in the back of a truck. What a fucking day. Yeah, imagine that what? It's just like you love this thing and now we're gonna use sawed to pieces

Imagine if that's how we had to get rid of our own Nothing would make me happier like if I just had to go like when my father finally passes that I have to go to just being like well, unfortunately here's Mr. Zabrowski jr. Here's the government hacksaw that you will use to separate your father's limbs to get him in our new Space saver economy caskets. Oh, well shout out. We love you kiddo. Have a good deaf we see Like Kato obviously killed Kato's a murderer, but that was okay It was a training exercise and the SeaWorld trainers were shipped in to do it on Christmas Eve and this poor Alexis Martina's died one of their best Swimmers, I know orcas hate working on vacation. Yeah, so they flipped out

They flipped out and I'd say big up Stiketo. I hope you're up there Feeding them a whale blubber to the Icelandic center in heaven. Mmm, would that be crazy? Would you get up to heaven as a whale and you should meet it? They get hunted by all the Vikings there I think they have their own heaven. I'd like to think so. I talked about this morning with my therapist about how dogs have little consciousnesses. And I wonder, I don't even know if necessarily even, I won't burden them with a soul,

but I would say that then they do have little minds. They are different. Yeah, they're definitely different. Yeah. Yeah, but I don't think there's much going on in tootsie said these days No tootsie's tootsie is she's barking and coughing for attention She's a reminder of all of us to see reminds us of like, you know when they wheel out the 102 year old like the last Living World War two that are the last living Korean war that yeah

And they wheel him out and he's got like 90 medals on a little hat. He's like hey And he's saying horrible stuff under his breath all the different slurs that I learned back in the day And he can't say anymore, but he thinks he's back then you know I mean in his mind That's what tootsies like tootie reminds us to feel guilt about being alive tootsie almost got sprayed by Agent Orange That's how old she is Wow yeah 17 man who are these old people you're showing us Rob? These are Tootsie and Human Form. Yes, these are literally looking at a bottle of Tootsies. God help me, man.

117, man. Rambo's 91. 122 year old woman, Jeanne Calmet with that big old cigarette and a glass of champagne in her hands. God love her. That chick was fucking blowing people before World War two and that's amazing 122 years old Wow. Wow. She's dead though. Okay good. Yeah, she's fucking thank God. Oh, yeah, this is a while ago Wow, no wasn't no, she's alive Wow, July 20 24. Yeah, she's going dude. She's a madame madame She don own car meal

We have like a half of do we cut her open and we check her fucking rings How do we even know you're just living in the Redwoods? Yeah, she died in 97. Oh Seven oh All right, so here's I just want to talk about this briefly but Lyle Menendez. Oh, we'll talk about this slightly Yes, because we have not talked about any of the stuff I think it's so funny that we have not talked about any of the stuff for the Menendez brothers Especially now that the LA district attorney lost his election. He was the big champion to try to get them on in this brothers out Yeah, he's gone now. So we have no idea what's going to happen with them. But it just shows that like even in jail, television makes you a bad person. Yeah.

While the net this is breaking up with his year of his wife of 21 years. Yeah. From jail from jail. She has been his champion Fighting for him while he's been in prison this is the entire time. He's bald now He's jacked let's just say Lyle looks really good I don't know how you get supplements in prison, but he looks like he's getting them Yeah, it's younger now than when he went in she because she was fighting for him She was trying to get do all this kind of shit for him, and how does he thank her?

He cheats on her with a younger woman. 21 year old. How did this even happen? Now he's divorcing her and he's gonna marry the 21 year old from prison! It's from prison, men are dogs. Here's Lyle. That's all it shows that Men are fucking dogs dude.

Lyle Menendez has a Facebook post that says guys this is not a cheating scandal. Oh it's not. Yeah. Why is he on Facebook. I think it's I think it's his girlfriend. Oh yes that is his guess. It is from his wife. His wife. His wife Lyle and I have been separated for a while now but remain best friends and family. You weren't divorced yet. That's a cheat. That's technically cheating. I continued to run his Facebook page with input from him and I'm forever committed to the enduring fight for Lyle and Eric's freedom and has been so evident for so many years. Maybe she likes it. No, cook it to the fucking curb girl. Like this is ridiculous.

That's you. You fucking just move on. It's her job now. Yeah. She could try to get the new prison dick when it's all done. And she, she ends it by saying, I will never stop fighting for them. Please continue to join us in this fight. It's not you anymore. Lady you're out chicks in. And it's a new chick. Just going to new is like is it merely buxy is her name the new the 21 year old student Do you think it's just because his wife's just a bummer and she's always like prisoners rights? Oh all day long and then finally gets this new chick who's like saying like fun cool stuff about Riz. I mean hopefully She was finally like I need to fuck a human

We've been together for so long. You don't think they didn't have an arrangement. They had to have had some kind of arrangement Yeah, so I don't think it's about dick. You're in there. Women are different. They are different in that way Human is different every human is but if you look at it, oh, it's different. I guess so I feel like cuz they got apparatus is that can fuck and make them so much more satisfied than any Human could ever do you know I mean all they got to do is they get Aspera aspera disses what as per asses is as to asses is that's what he Lyle has you're talking about prison sex But I think that he's honestly he's looking happy. He's fucking the luckiest man. He's holding his 21 year old girlfriend He's loving her he is loving I guess cuz then she can fight for the next 20 years

Yeah, you know I mean so he can keep leveling up like he can do the Leonardo Capra thing from Jim And my just shows you could shoot your mother in the face with a shotgun still two women to will love you from prison That's that's that is just like it is now you can do anything bars in hell That's it's that is just like it is now you can do anything bars in hell We talked about this on one of our update episodes But I will say my opinion about the Menendez brothers case and I will say this here Yeah, is that I have come around to the idea that their father was a Terrible user. Yeah, he was a serial abuser and I do believe that they were abused at some point during their lives. Yes. But I do believe that it sets a bad precedent to make it legal for them to kill for revenge in retribution because

I do believe that the mother was killed in cold blood and that if you just wanted to kill the father you could have done it and I would have believed it if it happened five years before that it was in direct fear for their lives and so the fact that it wasn't it's one of those where I still feel like it sets a bad precedent but I am also for people being rehabilitated I think that the point of jail should be to get you out of jail at some point this is their impression that chill yeah but the I, it should be, yes, if this whole rehabilitation thing is supposed to work. Yeah, if it's a thing at all, they should be prime candidates for something like that. Almost ready to get out.

I mean, just look at his abs. If you just decided innocence by fucking getting cut and access to creatine, Lyle Lyle Menendez is them is more innocent than the fucking Pope He is hot Look, I don't know how he got so how is he so cut in jail? Well, that's what I do is dips and sit ups But I feel like but it's still eating isn't most of what I heard what people keep telling me Why I look like fucking shit Even though I'm in the gym four days a week is that It's about what you eat and what you drink Henry. You are a pierogi of a person. I'm really sorry to break it to you like this

You're only gonna get so cut It's only gonna happen just getting larger I'm working out four days a week And I'm just my shirts nothing's fitting and I don don't think I look necessarily good I just think I'm getting bluer wider. You're never gonna have abs no I don't have no I will never have abs I know That's not what I want you're not gonna get the cum gutters. I just want to be smaller Slightly smaller and harder yes as you're like should we have what should our second meat be? Yes, as you're like should we have what should our second meat be? We have lamb and turkey we have

There's a carnivore surplus in our friend group That is the truth It's Thanksgiving you're doing great, buddy. You're doing great. Why does Lyle Lennon look so good? He always looked good. He didn't look that good. He was a child. Now he's fucking look at him. He's jacked. Yeah. But how does he get the proper protein? Know what you should do. Kill your parents. I've gotten close. I've gotten close I see I see that Bodywork plan and I wonder if I should get a lot of reading done I'll find out a lot about the mystique of Islam. I really would love prison. I

Gotta go. I do want to completely I want to slightly talk about we're going to do an entire episode dedicated to this It was going to be this week, but we had a little bit of snafus with schedule But because of that it actually the episode got much better an entire episode dedicated to this. It was going to be this week, but we had a little bit of snafus with schedule, but because of that, it actually, the episode got much better. But I wanna talk a little bit about the UAP conference that happened, I believe, two weeks ago. Yeah, what happened exactly?

This came out right when Investigation Alien popped up, and I started watching that, and then I couldn't even concentrate on whatever this huge development, and was a well they talk about this as a case Yes, basically it's always has to sound way more complicated than it is so that you won't understand so this story came out This is November 13th of this year two weeks ago They did a the house oversight committee and your silence was deafening. Deafening. I know it, because I wanted to save it.

But now it's time. I'll go through it a little bit. Yeah. They did a report. So originally in March, so the March of this year, the Pentagon had issued a report saying that there's been no evidence of an exosterrestrial spacecraft. And you trust them, right?

Always. Because they always tell us exactly what they think about themselves, and they're super, super, like, on the ball all the time. Not since a spaceship hit them on September 11th, 2001 have they dealt with this. Oh, yes. Now, the issue was led by,

there was a man by the name Mr. Gold, there was Lou Elizondo and Michael Schellenberger. Now, they reported, they brought forth this report, which was an independent study within the US government Looking for what they are ostensibly saying is what they call a USAP which is an unspecified Special access program now what this means is black ops stuff this is money congressional money that is put in some giant budget and they

can't find out exactly where this money is assigned. That's kind of what this, what they're trying to figure out is, are they misappropriating funds and are they not looping Congress in on what they're doing? That's why they had this oversight committee. And what happened was that it revealed, according to whistleblowers from within the government that there used to be several programs first it was a row there was OSAP if you've listened to any one of us talk about these are the what they call the UAP investigation essentially bureaus their goal was to go through every single bit of recorded sightings things that they have pulled from all these different sources from the Navy, from the Air Force, video, different readings from machines, like all

this kind of stuff, right? And their jobs were to sort of collate it and essentially figure out how can we make material and technology from this stuff? Like okay, if they're aliens, how can we use their stuff for us? That's the main thing That's why we're spending money on it Is it a national threat and can we do anything with it? And so when it revealed this the the oversight committee what it revealed Was that there is a new group and it's called immaculate Constellation which sounds like a fucking anime

But it is the name of the new in group within the in group which they called the umbrella group We're a bunch of smaller umbrella groups are underneath that one Do you think this is them trying to put God into aliens well calling it immaculate constellation? They they do winks at it because it's kind of the opposite They're trying to take the God out of it because a lot of our generals in our military, a lot of them are evangelical. A lot of them are Christian. And so they actually are the ones putting God into it because they are afraid of the

phenomena. They think it's demonic. They think it's literally of the devil. Then it would be coming from the earth instead of the sky. Yes, they don't know. Or it is coming from the oceans. of the sky. Yes, they don't know. Or it is coming from the oceans. Now we're learning this. So what Immaculate Constellation is saying

is that they have something like multiple million of terabytes of 4K, straight up, like the most clear footage you can see of UFOs. That we have telemetries, we have all this stuff stuff and it's hidden. We're not showing it anywhere and that we are also actively know that there are ships in the sky that are retroactively built by other programs within the United States government and China and Russia stuff like these triangles so they're saying the stuff that we've been saying as theories for many years. It's real, but that these triangles are government made and they are made to ape UAPs and that

all the stories of UAPs they bring up the jellyfish. I know you're a, you don't, you don't believe in the jellyfish. I know, but they bring it's in there. It's jellyfish. It looks like the ship is falling apart. They brought up a series of cubes It was a no series of orbs that traveled in a four by four cube Formation that was very interesting the one where they said they found a giant

circular UFO Hidden inside of a cloud bank. Okay, that was very interesting. Very nope. Very nope But what did we not get? anything single picture or Piece of this information is why I hate this shit. Well, it could there's all these promises for my entire life Yes promises. Well, I think that it what we're seeing here is The US government does not necessarily want to say that we are spending billions of dollars trying to understand this stuff in the sky.

That is not necessarily a threat. We don't know what it's doing. Then why can't we trace the money? Because it's also, this is the issue, is what they're, one of the, where's the money going, who is benefiting? And we don't really know, this is the problem, is that like, how expensive is it to collate all this data?

Like we know that Immaculate Constellation has a type of AI that they use that sweeps the archives of all of these intelligence groups, and they pull the best of the best from all of these footages into one giant file. Like they don't take it from them, but they copy it. So they have like proprietary software that is doing this and they are organizing this data like that was what's really, one of the interesting things about the breakdown from Immaculate Constellation

was the breakdown of UFO types, what they've seen, what they've done over and over again. It's really interesting, like they go from triangles to boomerangs to orbs to jellyfish to what they call natural. Tic tacs. Yeah, tic tacs are considered essentially orbs, but then they go to natural, which is no implants.

I mean they bounce. But no, they go, they naturals, which is like they look like weird, like amorphous shapes and stuff like that. But it's interesting in the fact that these people might get shot in the head or arrested if they tell this information. That's why it's so hard. They're up against a wall of red tape that says,

you are guilty of treason if this stuff gets out. But why? Because it's considered to be the top, top, top secret technology that we have in our very last back pocket. So is that us then? Did we make this stuff and that's why it's treason. We don't know We don't know that's basically what they're they are alluding to So somehow these objects know where our stuff is at all times You know like when there's a possibility that from the future who knows the? The Tic Tac, when they tick the Tic Tac sighting from December 2017, we saw that video of the Tic Tac.

When that went out by the ships, those ships had been there for two weeks. All of a sudden this Tic Tac arrives. They said the only way they can really describe that David Fravor who came upon the Tic Tac, the only way you could describe sort of the reaction the Tic Tac had was that it was almost like it was surprised to see him there.

It stopped at it in its tracks and then went opposite direction, came back, followed the plane at the exact same speed, then, boink, disappeared, and they're like, all right, what do we do now? They moved on to the next location of whatever they were working on because then they go to another collection point,

Tic Tac's're waiting for them already It's very we don't know what the hell it is But it's interested in us and it might be either it seems like there's a physical part of it that is Mimicking what we do and then some of it is is our stuff and we're making it look like you a piece now Did it why doesn't we have like I don't know Snowden or Julian Assange or anonymous fucking hack it and find This shit cuz it's I think it's largely physical I think they keep it off of these databases and most of these databases aren't connected to the internet as you know it

They're connected into intra like land based Like they don't go out. It's hard to get I have their own internet I think that this information's extremely difficult to get. And it's also, think that it's absolutely covered in misinformation and disinformation for the last 50, 60 years. So I think a lot of it's also, you got really good stuff mixed in with a bunch of fiction.

So I think that that has also been a true. Because if you have one fake thing, it's all fake. It muddies the whole, it destroys the whole batch. Yeah. So that's kind of, I think what how they do that which is and then think about every single time you you know I love you you and Marcus, but I show you guys the footage and everybody says it's fake which I do understand It looks silly, but if you go on the internet It's the same thing every single piece of every as soon as they put it out everybody destroys it on its own So what they have figured out is that we can just have

The internet and people debunk this stuff because they just don't want to they don't want to believe it So that's one way to maybe already Destroy it and then or putting up the things that are purposely false the things that you don't see in this jellyfish video that Rob is now showing for you again this famous video meatball covered in spaghetti dude. It's fucking this is real This is real this jellyfish and then what you don't see is eventually this thing sliding the water with no splash and then coming back up Yeah, so that's the other one of the other big relevant revelations is just they are in the water And we don't know why they're in the water. We don't know what they do. We don't know what they come from We don't know what their purpose are we don't know if the US government is actively working with alien

We don't know what they come from. We don't know what their purpose are. We don't know if the US government is actively working with alien intelligences. Probably not. I think that if they can't work with Marco Rubio, I don't know if they can work with an alien necessarily. You know, like you can't work with other normal stupid ass fucking Congress assholes, then how the fuck are we going to work with aliens? Well, maybe Trump will just deport them.

Eddie. Oh, Eddie, that's a funny Jimmy Kimmel joke take it down the street take it down the fucking street I mean we all would All right, so what else is going on oh you have any more update those are all our updates I mean, it's not even an update I feel like oh this first story is really fucked up. All right, let me do alien news is an update. Yeah for us. Yeah Now here's a good story this one also came out the last week, but I forgot to cover it ah this lady Has been called by a power lesbian

Okay by some Sources, I think that's in a daily mail. They in a thing is inappropriate man. I used to love the Daily Mail I still do it's where I used to get my trash, but they've gotten pretty evil lately. It's pretty bad. Yeah That's as good about it even up their evil. Oh sure Cory Burke was a is a young woman that Murdered the living fuck out of her father, Timothy Burke 67 with an ice axe And it seems that what happened was that she was pretty upset about the elections number November Police were dispatched the Fucker yeah, be careful watch your power lesbian daughters

You think they're all pacifists and pussies? Some of them get angry they so she had apparently she was trying to tell her father hers her Shut-in father Timothy who was 67 was barely Moveable moved in with her so he was dependent on her right so he was a bender on her and He moved in and all he did seem to be he was I'm going to do a little bit of victim blaming here and say that he was unpleasant, it sounds like. Sounds like he was a bit of a- Lots of people are unpleasant.

Of course, there's no excuse to murder him, obviously, but he was a Trump voter, and he was very proud of how well the election was going that evening for him. And what seemed that she said that she was in a highly emotional state, and then at the end, when she wanted to go to bed early at 8 p.m He says he wasn't gonna shut the lights off. He was gonna continue to watch the election She then proceeded to murder him hardcore

She flipped out she choked him to death with the ice axe by throwing him down on the ground Choked him with the ice axe and then fucking hacked at him a bunch of times and he's fucking dead So he she came at him hardcore Wow. Oh, yeah, and she said that she was upset She first tried to say I tripped. Oh, I tripped and I killed him with an axe You remember when the Menendez brothers tripped? Yeah Man, what a loud trip. Oh my god Oh, yeah, there were lacerations two inches deep on his rib cage and signs of asphyxiation. Um, he also had several round bruises on the back of his head as well as

several curved puncture wounds. Sounds like that's what happened. I mean, you gotta be careful. It was a small, it was like a more of a hatchet. It was an ice pickaxe. Yeah. It's what you used to like clear up ice on your card shit like that I believe I think or for hiking maybe either way either way she used it and you know She seems nice, but not anymore. This is why I mean Thanksgiving is coming up Yeah, and the politics are gonna be more polarizing than ever this year. Yeah, so that's why I'm telling you go get some than ever this year. Yeah. So that's why I'm telling you.

Go get some white, what is it, white thorn rose? Oh yeah, white thorn rose. Outdoor throne, huckleberry hill. You need that fucking blueberry caviar. Yeah, the black caviar is not bad either. You just need to chill, they ever relive it. Fuck out. Right before Thanksgiving, every time,

just do it right at the table too. Fuck be like They start talking about Trump's literally pull out a bowl for like just a bong right at the right at the Thanksgiving table Or and like yeah, you can just buy an ice axe at the fucking hardware store one or the other and then put them next To each other. You don't need a permit. Yeah, you don't need a fucking Handlers license you don't need to conceal anything. You can just buy that at the store Yes, and you can just equalize your family right there and then I'm just saying don't necessarily bring it to kill But show them that you will and she will die in prison. Oh, yes. Yeah, she's going to just prison forever

I am gonna say looking at her haircut. She's not gonna do well in there or great. Yeah, I mean whoa Was that one? That's her that what she was called the power lesbian is because of this picture of her She looks smoking in this one. Yeah, she looks good. She's attractive person, you know, you know, she'll do well in now She won me in God knows you know, but knows good days bad days Oh Yeah, but she is oh, yeah, she's fuck don't fuck don't murder anybody just wait four years They just die. So just know Okay, yeah, you're right Eddie. Don't murder people just know that the hate that drives the people you dislike the most is Killing them slowly. Yeah.

And that that man at 67 was not, maybe he wasn't that pleasant, but you could see about how he was driven to go back. He had to crawl back to his daughter's house to go live there. And that's the ultimate revenge is getting the control back and then you traumatize them back. Right? That's what you got to do. Take control of a narrative narrative make it scary for him

Her what I mean make it scary for the for the people that are fucking hardcore coming at you Wow, her wife is an editor at con day nas transgender news website them Fancy, yes, very fancy. Wow She then challenging stated that she knew that it needed to happen today and knew that there was something important about election day. She explained that she had just been reborn on her 33rd birthday last month. Oh, she might've been having some other mental issues. She's deep mentally.

Oh yeah, you don't really just kill somebody over an election. The alleged killer went on to say that she quote, wanted to help people change their attachment to their parents, but felt hyper-focused and disorganized when it came to her own attachments to her father. Yeah. And it's the most like McSweeney's way of explaining why you fucking murdered her father with an axe. That's pretty good.

Yeah, that's pretty good. You know, I was working on my attachment style. I'm going to say that more often. Well, there's another, umrational murder in the news a woman in Virginia upset over a botched pizza order Got her husband to allegedly stab and disembowel a worker who was arguing with her about it. This is important All right. This is this important guys. All right, so Obviously, this is a senseless murder and it's absolutely horrible, but you know what this really is about It's about a husband anticipating the needs of his wife

Yeah, and the fact that a husband a lot of times is tasked to do You might even concede you might even consider sometimes and I'm not saying this about my beautiful wife or your beautiful wife at all Sometimes a husband is tasked to do something. He doesn't want to do Sometimes a husband is tasked to do something he doesn't want to do. Yeah. And he's told to do it. Right. And he's told and he's told in a way to do it that you know that stuff's on the line. Yeah.

Right. To do it. And then you be and you don't want to do it. You don't want to drive across town. No, you don't want to do the thing that they're asking you to do. But it's like, but I'm going to say right now, as a husband, it's important sometimes you got to do those things right every once in a while because it's important to show because that's how you get them back. Yeah. Right. They get them to do it back. Like if you got in our on a marriage or Paul

at our marriage policies that we try to say yes to each other. We try to make sure we accommodate for each other. We try to help each other. See, I give a lot of, I don't know. You see that. And so Katherine Harper, the lady lady she told her husband to handle the situation and her husband All right, because I don't know how badly this pizza was pizza was botched, right? Mo D pizza if you ever been there man They used to have an outdoor open mic at the mod pizza next to the studio my recording said next to the old studio. You started brewing my recordings. So I get mad angry at these fuckers. Oh yeah dude. It's a bad pizza. Yeah. But this 47 year old Corey Harper took his wife's Catherine Harper's, I handle the situation words to heart when he stabbed a 24 year old

employee seven several times in the back and the front, and then slit their belly open to reveal their intestines. Now, again, as a man, horrible, horrible crime. As a husband, that's going above and beyond. And that is the kind of commitment, wrong way to do it, but that's the kind of commitment we as husbands need to show our Significant others. Yes, and yeah how high Oh handle the problem. I want to see his fucking guts

Oh Bernadette to it won't take over your shift for the weekend So we could go see wicked like you want to before it's spoiled by your dumbass friends. Guess what? I'm gonna go put her in a car all weekend I'm gonna fucking lock her up in the garage all weekend man. That's a husband Taking care of shit for his wife. This is the MOD the pizza mod pizza Wow, here he comes rolling and he's not happy. Okay Wow moments before moments before he's got the white so he's got the white and LM FAO sunglasses. No, that's an employee

Am I flipping this back and forth? Yeah, the guys on the other side of the counter Wow you Wow, he's got a little Normal. Yeah, he looks like a vest on like a suede vest. No, he's well dressed Yeah, why is he so well dressed? It looks like he just it was recently his birthday and his clothes were bought for him by his wife. Well, no, you look, they're definitely Macy's bought. Why is he so fancy dressed? This is a nice place. It's not fancy. No, but vest and a shirt and glasses for guy who disembowels a pizza maker. Yeah, no, he's very well dressed. He's definitely not happy about it. Um, but it said the victim, what's wrong with the pizza? That's what I want to know. How batch was the, if it like, cause the thing, how botched was the pizza?

Did it just say your wife's a content pepperoni on it? Yeah. Like what's the botched about it? I think that the guy lived by the way. Wow. Whoa. This is a big old fight, dude. Oh yeah. I was, this is a big fight. No, it's her what in the living fuck How could this possibly be about pizza? She told him to go handle the situation handle the situation And then it's all then the rest of the fight happens off-camera here. Well, yeah, cuz he's getting stabbed a bunch Yeah, the guy's backing up because the guy's got a knife. Yeah. Oh And this is him leaving after the guys Wow just leaving man. Wow, just leaving, huh? Wow. No reaction Oh, he had a knife in his back pocket. He also brandished a gun. Yeah. Wow. We had both. Holy. Yeah

Wow, really quite armed for the pizza store. Yeah, and you left I mean Tensions run high with pizza and you mean the moments before Natalie gets her pizza Yeah, this one I'm most afraid. You know, you mean the moments before Natalie gets her pizza. Yeah, this one. I'm most afraid You know you mean that anger that comes But anger before pizza is one of the most powerful Just talking scary emotions as of now the victim is still alive Great. Yeah, which is great. My parents almost got divorced over a box pizza order. How I remember it was after we saw Mrs Doubtfire sure and my dad he was thinking about divorce. Yeah

Or dressing like a woman and My I'm gonna got some stuff out of his system Yeah, he would have been helpful for him and my dad wanted sausage and my mom wanted mushroom And I remember we have my buddy Cory with us. We were driving, Cory was gonna sleep over that night. And my dad got the sausage, even though my mom wanted the mushroom. And then she was like, Jerry, you fucking piece of shit,

I don't fucking, you suck, you don't care about us, you care about us. It's like she's in the room, yeah. And then my dad took the pizza and he threw it on the ground. Whoa. And then he said, fuck this, and he started to walk home and

And my mom yelled at him all the way It's not about and then we sped off and then an hour later He showed up home after she made him walk all the way home and then they didn't get divorced that day They got divorced when he did other bad stuff, but the uh, but he was really stressed out Yeah, but you can't just get two pizzas just get two pizzas. Just get two pizzas have peace in your home Yeah, and you can't get mushroom on one side and sausage on the other All the sausage comes over and the flavor comes over. It's just too much. It mixed in the box You need two pizzas get a small mushroom or something. It's pizza. Yeah, like it's not that bad. It's not the most expensive

This isn't fucking see I think this is why I like both my two favorite pizzas are sausage and mushroom So I think this is just like a defense mechanism on why my two favorite pizzas I'm like, I like both the pizzas mom and dad, please stay together. So sad Wow, that's really sad and he didn't know No, he saw you like and they saw you down there like I gotta get away from this fucking little bastard I got divorced on my 20th birthday. Oh nice. That's actually nice. That's fun. Then that means it wasn't your fault No, no, I was long. Yeah, if it's unfortunately I'm sorry if you're under 10 listening to this if you get divorced then if your parents are going bye-bye It's your fault

You provided the stress that made them break up and they're gonna say that it's not your fault But it is all right But you're not listening to this and you better not be if you're under 10 and you're listening to this It's bad and you're making your parents miserable in and but if you do if you can take There's a little plastic thing in your mom's purse And if you can grab that and go to last podcast on a left calm go up the first number The mean is the first numbers you're looking for is like a three seven one two you're looking for that's an American Express Get the silver one. Yeah, I get the silver one always goes through Yeah, you could just do that

Just make sure you go for the big one ever the most important looking card you just read those and if you're if you're in The UK it works as well. We have a UK merch Yeah, it really does make sure you choose the UK merch store and not the US merch because it won't go to you. Yes, this is we're finally becoming soupy sales This is how we do grass roots merch And outside for some of us in our emails, oh, I have a listener email I got a little bit of pushback because we were slightly callous About that VR thing with the Korean mother. I still don't feel anything people were upset, but I do think it's funny

I do think I get why you're upset, but also I don't know what to die We talk about all kinds of horrible shit with that six hour of Joseph Fritz old material no one complained no so that's fine Mostly we were I get it yes, I mean we react to madness Sheer insanity well, it's high emotion So I feel like watching someone react like that like I understand that this woman is traumatized and it's traumatizing to see but there is something about this idea of Having a VR like meeting of a loved one a VR thing is an uncanny valley style That I just don't of existence as it's that I just don't I can't wrap my head around that does it that would not make

Me feel better what that person went through, but I got a great feedback about other VR abominations Because it is I have friends my buddy Chris Brown he did all the puppets for your pretty faces going to hell he's a genius my friend no I am my friend Chris Brown him Jeff Epstein yeah my buddies my friends Sean Combs you know my guys my guys I'm always with the guys I go hang out with Orthold James you know I love Orinth, you know, I love all the way back

But Chris Brown he lives in the VR when he's not working He's in his VR world and I know that there's a lot of VR stuff that is we're way outside right now You mean like we don't know how deep VR has gotten. So here we go See we talked about horrible sex fantasy creations, but it's already there. You see, the popular metaverse platform VRChat is not only a quote unquote place with its own fascinating culture and history, it is also a breeding ground for every single crazy fetish and kink you can think of, and fetishes that were previously unimaginable before the VR era.

You see, there's a practice called ERP, which stands for erotic role play. ERP has a large set of standardized software, hardware 3D models, and hardware to make the experience as close to sex in the physical realm as possible. It's full demolition, man. Yeah, so they got dick sucking machines, they have all that stuff now,

they can tug on you, right? ERP enables people to have sexual experiences in a safe environment. It also enables literally any kind of sexual experience you could imagine. The only real limiting factor for what kind of fetish creations is the amount of time an artist would like to spend in janky software making their creations. Some people spend huge amounts of money and time on models, worlds, and gadgets gadgets These practices are frowned upon by the general community But it does not stop private groups from hosting and in their own ERP platforms These groups are tightly organized with their own security and age verification systems

Their activities range from standard casual sex and to sex battle royale games To wilder events where people crank it to experiences of alien penile probe insertions while drowning inside of a tube or six titted spider giantess's for where participants are swallowed and become the baby She is pregnant with every time people call me weird. I'm not doing any we're not weird. No, we're not weird. We are Surprisingly milk toast. Yeah, we are surprisingly normal. Yeah, just a little brash. We just say come yeah That's what we say Out there erping off. Oh, yeah, man, They're allowed to. But wow, Thanksgiving is now here.

Yes. So I hope that you live every day knowing that carbs don't count on Turkey day. And you're going to love the fact that you get to eat as much as you want for a little while. You know, no one could judge you unless of course you're Canadian or European and that's dear. That's wrong. You're Canadian or European and that's dear. That's wrong. You're wrong And well, I laugh at you Europe and Canada that you can't have it because our Thanksgiving is probably

I'd say the top American holiday. Oh, yeah, I'd say that's a top American holiday Yeah, and that your chumps you don't get it. Mm-hmm. I'm glad that we get it and God is definitely I'm glad that we get it and God is definitely Stooped and murdered though exactly. Yeah, it is definitely like, you know, there is some guilt Fuck it though. I mean I'm eating turkey every time I put it I feel guilty until I pull that turkey out of the oven. All I know is I'm thankful I'm thankful for the turkey given this life. I'm thankful for the yams committing suicide so I can eat them

Are you gonna use my gravy hack? What, is that an ax or something? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's because I take the turkey voted for Trump. No, my gravy hack for people out there. See, you don't cook a turkey the same way I do. When I cook a turkey, it's in a bunch of juices. What do you mean, though, I don't do that?

You put yours on like a little pedestal and like there isn't as much juice. But I based it. You based it, but mine's like in a fucking bunch of fucking liquid. Yeah, but I do like it. I like it perched on the thing so they can get the proper heat underneath it. I'm not saying your turkey's bad. It's delicious. I love eating your turkey.

I'm just saying if you make it like I do and there's a bunch of veggies you still Not there's not nearly as much but the second mines another course, it's a carrots and celery Yeah, you could do it all the same Yeah But I'm just saying if you take that juice with the carrots and the celery and you put that in like a blender or a robot Yeah, that's how you get is a gravy hack No, yes Very much to not like have to do the thing where you got to whip it up real fast That is a hack that I've done in the past and people really enjoy it

But I do kind of like it. I'm making a hard stuffing your mom's way this year Oh you are I'm gonna make it her way where it's got it's a up your fucking ass. Hey, come on You put me in there and you put the turkey juice in an all-day long. That's what I'm gonna do. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah It's very good Even do like sausage if you want I'm going to get divorced when I'm putting sausage in now. I'm making pork messes. Mmm Yeah, but I'm coming for dessert. You're only coming told dessert. Yeah. Well, I mean there will be food left over I imagine remember when I did the Polish turkey and I stuffed it with kielbasa. That was fucking awesome. That was yeah Yeah, oh shout out is my mom's birthday yesterday She had a birthday mama Catholic. She would have been 74 years old if you want to honor my mom You can go watch our movie how America killed my mother directed by Travis Irvine

It's a it's a great holiday watch if you want to cry We can go how America killed my mother calm the URL was still available Also, don't forget we are touring we are hitting the road did we're gonna be in New York Now every Philly is sold out. Go ahead and stand outside in the cold. Yeah, you fuckers. Yeah Yeah, but we'll probably come back to Philly soon. Oh very much And then also we're gonna be doing in January Atlanta. There might be a side story show. It feels like so I want you know know It is not fully set in stone, but I believe it is happening. Yeah, that's garage. We're gonna be doing side stories You're gonna want to get your tickets for that

Immediately because it's gonna be fully improvised and we're we're not even gonna be coming with stories We're gonna be taking suggestions from the audience itself Is that what you want to do? Yeah fully improvised. All right, so we're doing no work none. That's what he's declaring You know, we're doing improvised shows. I mean the show the show at Humboldt was pretty improvised that we had topics Yes, we did have a list of things we wanted to hit but it's not we're not gonna even do that Wow They are gonna tell us what to talk about. Okay, that's all improv. I what? And then there is them in February. We're going to be in Dallas.

March, we're going to be in Nashville at the Ryman baby. Cannot wait and cannot wait to be back. April Detroit on the 18th and on the event, Toronto in May. And then we're going to add some more dates, I believe. Oh, very much. Yeah, but we haven't done it yet. But keep your eye on last podcast and left comm to check all that out Join our patreon if you want to watch us talk to each other

Yeah, patreon.com says last podcast on the left also side stories comes out the video version two days afterwards on YouTube So if you want to like hold out and watch us do this stupid shit, you can do that as well Yes, of course. Yeah, and then all the great stuff that we do on LPN TV, it gets released on the YouTube. So go follow last podcast on the left on YouTube. Check out Hoopa Googa game. HGX two is going to be on December 12th. That's going to be a lot of fun. We got a full, I got a whole, I got Santa Claus is going to be there. It's gonna be great. I got some Christmas music coming. The wonderful scenic as Navi is going to be there. We're going to have a great time. It's gonna be great. I got some Christmas music come in the wonderful scenic as Navi's gonna be there I'm gonna be great. We're gonna have a great time. It's gonna be amazing. What's gonna the good put? Thanksgiving special just came it's on YouTube go check it out

I think it's our best episode it really I watched the three-second clip and I was just like with no sound that I was just Cackling. Yeah, I think it's literally our best episode. Yeah, so go check that out. It's amazing. We love you guys Thank you for listening the side story. Yes, you fuckers. Hail Satan and hail Kate have fun on Thanksgiving. Don't be a fucking did not bring up the Millennial genocide smoke weed instead of drink. Yes, family fucking smoke that we I can't stress this enough They are if they matter less when you're high they do