Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: Puppy-Gate

Episode Date: February 11, 2026

Henry & Eddie bring you this week's wildest stories and the latest slew of Epstein Updates - AND THEN - Drama at the Puppy Bowl as 4-legged wheelchair bound winner is revealed to be deceased for months post-performance, Pennsylvania Chef dies by throwing himself into an Olive Garden Fryer, Dangerous Pranks, and much, much more... For Live Shows, Merch, and More Visit: www.LastPodcastOnTheLeft.comKevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Last Podcast on the Left ad-free, plus get Friday episodes a whole week early. Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus.  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

There's no place to escape to. This is the lost podcast. On the left. Side stories? That's when the cannibalism started. Side stories. Yes. All right.

Are you guys ready? Ready. La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la we're cooking Oh all right? Oh right man I feel like we've already had two shows before we even started but i got a big announcement for you. Was that because the little the dance I did for you? You love dancing. The nude dance I did for you?

You were nude? I couldn't tell. Thanks the flaps. Your stomach was hanging over your penis. Yeah. I didn't see nothing. Hey, everywhere I go, I'm safe for work. I got a new dog moving in.

A foster dog. Panchito. Now, I know. It's another dog that was adopted into your home in the dead of night while you were not there. Well, I was out of town. Julie's got Panchito coming in. If anyone needs a dog, Panchito is available.

We're pushing this dog. He's a 10-year-old chihuahua. Yeah. So it's sort of like, you know, yeah. It's like right now if King Charles got on the dating apps. You know, like... He's the youngest dog in my house. Wow.

Of three. You know, he's a baby. He's the sickest of them, though. No. No, no. He's not as sick as we hoped. Great. Yeah.

So he's actually going to be fine. We're getting him neutered this week. He's 10. We're getting him neutered. Dude, you should not have. Have you heard, I've been following, I'm just looking this up right now. Because even just bringing this up, it's just like there was a series of guys. I mean, you must neuter your fucking dog.

But also, that's real late. It's real late for sure. 10 years into it. All right. But if he's going to move in, I can't have this guy like full-blown. He can't be banging Tootsie or anything. If he fucks Tootsie. Tootsie's ear will fall off.

I think that that will finally kill her. Yeah, he would want. Tootsie's not supposed to have. Can Tootsie? have an orgasm at this point? I don't think she can have an orgasm, but if I was an old dog, I'd want to bang Tutsi. I mean, well, because she's

so pliant. Yeah, she's got that flapping vagina. You know, when she pees, it's like opening the door and closing, you know, it's always moving. I'm trying to find this activity here. So I feel like, yeah. Desperately trying to save us from this conversation guys. But Panchito's moving in, and you know, we're taking his nuts because I can't have,

I especially can't have him banging Harley. Yeah, no. No, well, Harley will, let's just say, she's a lover. Harley will make him regret it. Absolutely. So there's this guy that I've been following called Brother K. BSM was on Instagram. Sowebriety profile that he does. He is an in, he calls himself an inactivist.

And his job is he wears a shirt that says, dude, where's my foreskin? Okay. And then he goes around with this group he calls the blood-stained men where they go places in white with bloody handprints on their penis areas. in order for them to protest circumcision. So honestly, we're already about to receive emails from them. Yeah, we're about to receive emails from them. Yeah, this is the most that they've ever had. Well, now that they don't have all of their penis,

they have plenty of time to send emails. I guess that, I mean, most of my penis got chopped off. This is cool, man. I like these guys. They get me going. I don't really understand. I think these guys put the cum and circumcision. I mean, that's only if they're the guys doing it. Welcome to side stories.

My name is Henry Zabrowski. I'm sitting here with the incredible comedian Ed Larson. Hello. How you doing? Who wants an old dog? He's for a chihuahua. He's real long. But the anti-circumcision groups are going to be coming after you for taking your dog's right to choose its balls away from it.

Why is this woman wearing it? Because she is a, she's a gender traitor. What do you mean? I don't know. She's on their side? Is this a period thing? This is a thing. There are women that are a part of the no circumcision world. The no circumcision world is about this idea that babies are essentially mutilated at birth in order to fulfill some form of societal contract of what penises are supposed to look like. And we just know that it's difficult to clean.

Yes. I know, but also, we say it's difficult. I know our four-skinned brothers out there, I hear you. I already hear you slapping your fucking sleep. leave together. I can hear you doing it. When you get a moment, get that Q-tip out of the head of your cock and write an email. I know it's not

that bad. Side stories, L-P-O-T-L-G-Mail.com. Defend your foreskin. Yes. But also, let's not go out there and beg for it back. Okay, guys, once it's gone, it's gone. I don't want picks, but how long can a four-skin get? Oh, I actually think a four-skin can be bigger

than your penis. Really? Yeah, I think that's kind of the idea. If it's super long, you've got like trim it back at least. People are afraid to lose the foreskin because apparently you lose length and sensitivity. And honestly, I don't need either. Yeah. I don't need to be more sensitive. You've never seen the guys who do the foreskin extension?

We've shown them. Have you seen that? Yeah, it's what got us kicked off of Twitch the first time. Oh, well, we're not on Twitch anymore. We're on Netflix. Yeah, yeah, we could show it now. Yeah, show it right here. Show it right here.

Yeah, yeah, in this area here where I'm waving my hand. No, I've seen it's a tugger. They attach it to their knee on the inside of their pants And also sometimes it'll stay there all day The tugger will pull on the skin of their penis the entire day Interesting Anything but go to therapy Yeah

It's like those guys you get a chain That go straight from the tip of their deck to their ear Just so they can wiggle their ear and jerk off You ever hear about those guys? You ever know about these guys? They're not in the files I'd say that much What magazine did you see that in?

I don't know Where did you even come up there? Where did that come from? I think it's a joke I told when I was like in seventh grade. It's very possible. And I'm using it again because I'm out of material. Why not? You know, why not?

We've got to come to the end of material eventually. So we have updates and updates. All right. So if we can we hear the song? Hear the song again. Play my mother fucking music. It's an island adventure. Heck yeah, it's Jeffrey time.

The files aren't stopping, so why should we over here in side stories? We offer the freshest takes on the newest Epstein files every week. And gosh, golly, we have fun with it. That's right. Once you pop, you can't stop. No, especially if you're, I guess, a person involved in the government. Because all of them are involved. Yes, especially because they all say that he didn't do anything.

It's kind of funny. You know that guy that we've been talking about for fucking half a decade? Years and all of the files and all of the insinuations and all of stuff. Obviously, Cash Patel, no evidence. Nothing. One of the biggest updates of this week. So before we even update the updates, listen, we're not going to do the entire episode of

updates today like we did last week. We're not going to do that to you. We could. And I want to. Yeah. If I could, I'd turn this whole show into the. Epstein show. We would never talk about a single other thing until one of these guys, and I just mean the term

these guys, is dead. Once the government stops fucking and killing kids, we might stop talking about. We'll stop talking about. We'll stop talking about. I'll stop talking about it out of our house. I'll fucking get you out of my house. I don't want to be here. No, this is like when fucking ESPN had to cover Sandusky. No, they were just, it was just so hard being like, So from this angle, you're right here. Sandusky was just in his lawn chair.

You can get a really good angle on a lot of the front penises of these little boys. Like you could see with the teleprompter and everything. Sandusky, not in the finals. Wow, I guess. Epstein wasn't a big sports guy. No. So Cash Patel, our YouTuber head of the FBI, has come out and said, no evidence has been found, linking Jeffrey Epstein to any form of a pedophile network.

Even though, good work, guys. You'd think that the female body inspectors would be the first ones to know. But we now know if you read all these emails and you don't think that there's not some. Yeah. There's no picture of Jeffrey Epstein. Yeah. I mean, we know that there is. There is pictures.

Of him fucking little girls. Yes, because there's millions of files they refuse to show us. But in those pictures, there are literally, there are. are pictures of Jeffrey Epstein having sex with teenagers in the files. We know this. They're just trying to say there's no pictures of Jeffrey Epstein with an invoice

standing next to Bill Clinton with the teenager holding up a newspaper that headline saying this is the day that I was trafficked, right? It doesn't exist. That is what they're saying that they're, yeah, sure, there's no evidence because they're fucking international spies

and they're literally multi-billionaires in the secret keeping. industry, you fucking morons. Well, there is evidence, though. Yeah. Because it's there. They just didn't investigate it. They didn't want to investigate it. So that's one thing. We know Richard Branson, this is

another update. Richard Branson and the emails, the reason why we're constantly going over this is that there's so many emails and there's so much to go over. We don't want anyone to get forgotten or left behind. No. I like Richard Branson. We got to make sure that he gets his due. I miss him. I miss us. He is,

Richard Branson gave kind words to Jeffrey Epstein about things blowing over. obviously after his 2008 arrest. Same thing with Noam Chomsky. I'm not taking a single fucking word back about Noam Chomsky. I think that Jeffrey Epstein, anything he touches the shit. So Richard Branson,

same thing, casually talking about Jeffrey Epstein's harem of girls. Can't wait to see him again. Can't wait to do all the stuff. Again, coddling him, expressing him, we've seen this over and over again. Noam Chomsky, seriously, if you're a child molester and you need a shoulder to cry on,

go to the web. damp shoulder of Noam Chomsky, he will absolutely support you in your time of need. I hate when a child molester has the last, last name, Chomp. It's fucking disgusting. It's better than being like lickety-split. Noem-lickety-splitsky. My name's Noam Lippey-Splitsky's, and I want to tell you about what you should think. But Gis-Laine said, does she put the fifth?

Yeah, Gis Lane is also now pled the fifth. She says she's not talking unless they give her some form of immunity. Dave Garnie moved her to fucking vacation land. All I know is it's just nice to see a woman get punished for all of this. Yes, the only woman. That is it. That's just nice to see. Just, yeah, but Gis Lane, she's holding her cards deeply, deeply close to her double Ds,

and she is holding them tight. She knows. She knows. She can't reveal all. until she can be free to have her only fans because she's going to make bank on only fans. I mean, honestly, shouldn't prisoners be allowed to have only fans?

Side stories L-P-O-T-L-Gmail.com. Why not let them make money? God forbid you release them and then they're broke and they just only want to commit more crimes. Let them make money when they're in jail. Let an only fans of infat. I think this is a great idea. We all do.

Everybody does. And I can hear the agreement in the emails. You know how many people get fucking wet and hard for prisoners? I mean, so many people would subscribe to this. It's almost bad. We're leaving people love. It's almost like it's bad for society. We like making money off of prisoners.

That's why arguably a lot of them are slavery. Yes. And so why not let them make their own money or just take that money? Let them, they're already jerking off. We know they're jerking off. This is where, yeah, just, yeah, you take this. Apparently it's happening. It leads to bad things.

Oh, it has happened. Yeah, yeah, yeah, they do get arrested. Yeah, yeah, prisoners of Mexico are certainly only fans. And it's graphic. We know it's graphic. That's why we subscribe. It better be graphic. If it wasn't graphic, then what the fuck?

You mean to tell me. I'd be if it was just like that. The gay Mexican prisoner only fans I signed up for it. It's a little over the time. Guys, what do you fucking think is? happening in there. Do you know that if prisoners were allowed to have only fans it would be more legal than whatever Jeffrey

F. He did and not the government's hiding? Oh yeah, dear. Our president is a convicted rapist. Live from your blade. So here we go. We got back. Let's bring it back. Let's bring it back. Oh, yeah. We haven't gotten our emails from Richard Branson's company yet because they're really reaching out

to everyone who's talking about it and making sure they email and scare them. Please do. Please email us and side source. L.P. O'T L.gmail.com. If you want to intimidate us, please email us. That'd be great for the show. Absolutely. So we have, Congress is now looking at unredacted files.

So the point where I believe it was a Republican senator. Oh, yeah. I forgot who it was that came out and basically said the shit I saw. I'm going to tell the whole world unless someone tells them ahead of time, I'm just going to tell people. We also know that the news has traveled so far that even CBS covered the fact that we're pretty fucking certain a chunk of orange jumpsuit is seen entering into Epstein's jail

cell. Really? Buddy It's on the major news now. Like now it's there. It is past conspiracy theory thought. It's CBS is bought and sold. Yeah, they're fucking, they're on the president's side. And they're literally having to report because it's that real. It is happening. It's all of these things are falling a ring apart. I do want to issue a correction. Okay, please. I fucked up. So last

week I was trying to talk about Jeffrey Epstein's connection to 4chan. So a lot of hay was made about the idea that Jeffrey Epstein met with Moot, Christopher Poole, who ran 4chan right around the same time period that 4chan re-put up their poll bulletin board. Okay. Which is where Q would come out of all of the racist memes that would fuel the grassroots campaign behind the Trump campaign, all of this stuff. And I put a lot on Frederick Brennan, who was the, I described him as he looked like a potato.

Yes. And that he was a little man, right? And everyone, people, some got mad at me, right? Because I understand he has since, he was not Hewinnon. I'm sorry. I misspoke.

I was misremembered, that documentary on HBO. I had misremembered. I wasn't prepared to talk about him. Frederick Brennan is, he did help run 4chan and ate Coon and all these things. He sold his stake in it in order to get away from all of this.

Oh, so he's a good guy. He's a fine guy. He's a, he's a fine. I was deeply brutal on him. He's a fine. He's fine. I'm still not going to say he's great, but I'm going to say he's fine because now he is pushing back hardcore against radicalization on the internet.

He's working really hard in trying to push him. He did not start to you. He was just a part of the original. He started a fortune. It was a part of the original scene of this world of the truly internet, the truly... When rotten got, run rotten.com got kicked off, he stepped in. There was stuff like this, stuff like that. But I actually got a really comprehensive email from somebody that is actively interested in 4chan.

Okay. So I feel like a lot of people, which I understand, they're hesitant to think about any of these things in a neutral way. Yeah. I get it. I get why you're going to see. say, I don't like 4chan. It's hard for me to understand that there's any good in it. Personally. I totally get it. Because it's hard to wrap our heads around.

But this is a more humanistic approach to the history of 4chan to sort of understand. Right. Like, so there are people I know, there are a part of the original boards. I know that the story that is told by the media, on one hand, is a way to try to destroy any form

of independent journalism on the internet. Right? There's one way of saying it's all for racist. It's all for There's a way to blanket coat a thing. Do we consider 4chan journalism? No, I'm just saying the idea of independent voices talking. Yes. Makes the media that has created a very careful kind of corporate way of delivering the news.

Makes them very nervous and they don't like it. Right? So for a long time, even till now, the internet was viewed as a fad. All of this. You guys don't even understand. Like, way to kind of unpack it is that even within show business, our world is under the title of new media. Okay.

The internet has been making content for over 20 years. Oh, way over that. It's not new media. This is how traditional systems view these systems. Last podcast of the left is over a decade old. Yes, 15 years old. That can't be considered new media. Exactly.

But it's technically new media. So this is how the old. old media portrays us because they don't want us to be involved in the media. They don't want us in these areas. But we're not. We're entertainment. I'm just saying. I'm just talking about it.

Yes, yes. I'm just saying they don't want, they don't like it. They don't like uncontrolled speech. I don't like them. So none of us. We hate them. So I'm just saying the history of these things are slightly more complicated than the way the television is going to tell you.

So this was an interesting run at this. I've been an active 4chan user since 2008. I can confidently say the relaunch of poll was a coincidence. The previous iteration, New, got deleted for turning into Stormfront. As a consequence, the displaced users of New were being incredibly annoying, lowering the quality of the overall site, irritating the mod team. During the time Epstein would have met with MUT, he basically already abandoned us and the lead moderator, GrapeApe,

took over most of the operations. We had this basically verified thanks to the soy jack party hack last year. Mute at the time was basically focused on canvas, a side project most people forgot about, and this would have been what he was doing during 2011. His interest in 4chan was waning because he was 23 at the time and had been running the site since he was 15. In charge of 4chan's community,

the stories about how he kept 4chan running were insane. Great ape, poorly known as rape ape, is a fun figure in many ways, but at this time you only knew about him and his role if you spend a ton of time in the in real life channel for 4chan. Either way, he had very little operations, very little interest in the operations that we actually know. Thanks to the aforementioned hack, they now know this,

that the claims of being a quote, great hacker applied to moot are also overstated. The shardy hack only happened because of outdated architecture from when moot was still in charge and was a semi-known vulnerability at the time. Grape ape from what users on 4chan know about him is a militant neo-Nazi, but still allows left his speech and thought because of his viewpoints on free speech, the booies still the idea of opening it all up. They thought that poll was what they called a containment board, a place to put all the bad guys

that were operating side of 4chan. And so that's kind of how it always worked and never stayed there and it would leak all around. So it was just more that Epstein meeting with Mute probably did not change 4chan, but it shows what Epstein was thinking about at the time. Yes. So it is not that he created poll and that he did these things on 4chan to harness the power of the internet in order to change people's view of people on the internet. Because what we talked about last week. Yes, that Epstein created Pizza Gate. He created a world. He got really interested in image management on the internet. Okay. After his 2008 arrest. So now we're saying he didn't create pizza. Gate. No. We were saying that he joined in on the guys making fun of Pizza Gate. We don't know

if he created Pizza Gate or not. Okay. I'm just saying that the poll creation on 4chan and his meeting with Moot seems to just sort of be a coincidental timing. And it's more just showing that Epstein was really, really interested in harnessing the power of the internet and recreating your image. Okay. And so that was a, that was kind of the thing. It's a little bit more complicated. Seems like a technicality, but he was talking about pizzas when he was trafficking children. We know that we some of its code, some of its pizza. Yeah. Let's literally. Have you seen the beef jerky stuff? Oh, I know. No, I know. I know. What's this? Maybe it's cannibalism stuff going on or they're talking about beef jerky and it's so crazy that I can't put

anything past it anymore. Oh no. Now they're like, I'm talking to someone about it and they're like, is it true that they were sucking the blood out of babies? And then I have to say, I don't think that's true, but I no longer can say that for sure. That's the craziest shit that's happening. The pictures of Prince Andrew, Andrew, hovering over the child, I was talking about this last week, them with the American flag tablecloth, with their feet on it, and them all partying, all fucking gassed out, and their fucking pupils all black and shit.

These guys are having way too much fun. I am fucking sick of billionaires having fun. Yeah. There's also some crazy-ass people that have been in trouble this week that I feel like we should at least bring up that are in the Epstein files. David McKillips had to resign as the head of Chucky Cheese. He actually, these are some people still have shame. There's also, you know who's hardcore coming after the Epstein people? No.

Poland. Okay. Poland is hardcore coming after. They're doing all of this research going into basically just. Poland is willing to say that Epstein was a Russian spy. Thank you, Poland. Thank, I guess. So they're coming out.

It just sucks that it's like, ah, Poland. Yeah, well, you know, they're dead. I immediately think they're wrong. Yeah, of course. Were they in charge of pole? Oh, God, no. That's all I do. It's going to be broke his whole time.

All right, here's someone that I learned about this week that I didn't know existed. Leon Black, he owns Life Touch, which Life Touch is basically the company that takes every photograph of students. Yes, the... And they log all the pictures. They make all the yearbook photos. And even if your kid doesn't want to be in the yearbook, they still take their photo and log them.

Yes. So basically, Epstein was in touch with Leon Black, who had possession of every photograph of every American child. Yeah, so... Yeah, so that's fine. Yeah. He was just... You just had those.

Yeah. And he helped him deal with his action. accusations. He helped him with all that stuff. Another person I learned about this week is Jack Horner. See, this is fascinating. This connected to this story that came out of an RFK Jr. taking Jeffrey Epstein and Gislane hunting for dinosaur bones. Yes. So this was like one of those. Back in the day. You see this headline and you're just like, okay. It's another one of these baffling ones where like, yeah, of course they went searching for dinosaur bones. And he's like, hey, you want to see a raptor bone. And he's like, pull, his fucking penis out of his fucking flying. So explain Eddie. How'd we get here? So Jack

Horner is, he's basically Sam Neal from Jurassic Park. He's an advisor on the Jurassic Park films. He got in trouble because he was let go by the museum that he worked for because he got married to a 19 year old student who had a boyfriend.

Guys, I'm so fucking sick of all. I am so sick. I'm sick and tired of you. Okay? He's a scientist. He is the guy that discovered that dinosaurs

are birds. Yes. Like this is the guy, this is that guy. He's the one that did all of the, he's the why we think like that. This is a scientist who spent his whole day thinking about dinosaurs. I, is it just because he wanted to date a woman that had a favorite

dinosaur? Yeah. Is it because that it's just like the idea of a seven-year-old and a 19-year-old? I know she's, again, she's legal technically. Yes, she's legal. That means that he was 51 when she was born. I'm 44. So that means that I would wait seven years from now for someone to be born to later marry them when I'm 70. But think about how you could really crazy.

Think about how you could really build that out, though. Yes. nice that would be to kind of know I got my wife at factory clear, right? Very top. Fill it with all my references. Oh, yeah. Well, now you don't have to worry about that, especially if she's a Jurassic Park fan. They keep cranking out those movies. Oh, yeah. They keep cranking those out. So I think he's going to be fine. So here we go. This is the year, this is the same year of his interactions with Jeffrey Epstein began in 2012 when he started stripping this 19-year-old undergraduate student.

The school museum, they wildly ask him to leave. Lots of people were happy that he did, right? He's just out here. He's in the bone community. Yes. But one of the most interesting things that it seems that he has been doing of the last year is he's been trying to grow chickens with dinosaur tails. Yes.

And guess who funded it? Jeffrey Epstein. Oh. Jeffrey Epstein was his longtime friend. They gave him some money. And it seems that this is another example. of a fucking old pervert emailing

some other pervert to be like, how me get puss-puss. Yeah, it's like, can you make an accredited professor that is famous. A famous accredited professor. Very, been represented in multiple films. Has to email this

fucking loser. Listen to Jeffrey Epstein talk. Again, I want to remind you, listen to him talk and him like, you would have absolutely wonderful what you do. That's absolutely fantastic. It's just one of the wonderful things that I've learned so many things. You're calling this fucking guy to literally

be like, me want new young tight puss-puss. How me get? Me only no teradactyl. Yes. Can you grow me an old person that looks like a child? Here we go. He visited

his time. He went to the we know that old Jack Horny went to the New Mexico Ranch because the New Mexico Ranch is where they went searching for dinosaur bones and Jack Horner is the one that taught RFK Jr. how to look

for dinosaur bones with Jeffrey Epstein and Jusley Maxwell. So RFK Jr. obviously doesn't know what the fuck he's doing. He works out in jeans. He's just wandering the desert. He's the guy who we got looking for dinosaur bones. We think he's the expert. No! No! The only

dinosaur bone he can find is his own penis inside of Cheryl Hines. And what a lucky lady. To be his vessel. Every day she wakes up and she's like, what a great decision I made. Every day she drinks from his river. She gets on her knees and I pour my river down into your chalice. Every fucking me.

These fucking unbelievable losers. Oh, my God. We need to restart the government. Oh, honestly. Ten years ago. I don't care who's good. Just end it and restart. None of them are good.

It doesn't matter. Not a single one of them are good. Even if I like you, I hate you. If you know a single secret thing about the Epstein files and you are not talking to a microphone right now, you can go fuck yourself. How about that? Yeah. How about that? If you're hiding information about people that are currently in the government, namely the people that were redacted out of a 2005 sexual assault claim against Jeffrey Epstein, a list.

of co-defendants that were all blacked out. Oh, why are they being? Who are they being redacted to protect? And then the other shit is there is a literal email after all of this talk about how there is no lists and there's nobody prosecute. There is an email that lists the six guys. These are the ones we should go after.

These are the guys. And guess who's the top spot? Our fucking president. And guess who's the second top spot? his best friend over in Saudi Arabia. And guess who's in the third spot? The fucking Andrew formerly known as Prince.

And then we got three others. And I'm going to get, we're going to see Howard. I'm going to see Howard Lustick on there. Howard Lustick, okay. I'm going to see Howard Lustick on there. I think we're going to see Lexxner. These are guesses. These are guesses. Les Wexner. Yes. I mean, of course. Who knows? Of course. Well, he's this old friend.

He had a lot of friends. He had a lot of friends. What do we think about? Net and Yahoo. That'd be a fun one. Big Net. You know, I do find a fine. How did he keep up with friends so well? I mean, it's so hard.

I have like a pledge that I call someone every week. Yeah. That's a big lift for me to call one person. How does he... He's a great friend. You'd say anything you want about Jeffrey Epstein. He keeps in touch. He's asking questions.

He wants to know everything about you. Everything about you. Yeah. I've never had a friend be so interested in all of the intricate details of my money and my life. Imagine your kids taking their middle school photographs and then EFstein being like, hey, great photo of your kid. Yeah, just randomly. He had this. So who is this guy who's exposing?

Who is he exposing on this? Representative Roe Kana? Yeah. He exposed. These are the names right here. Yep, Lex Wexner. Ha ha! I called it.

Yes. And Sultan Ahmed bin Salim. Yes. Great. Of course. Go get him. We're the Americans. Now, all right.

Can we talk about a little bit. bit of conspiracy that stuff that I don't think is true. Salvatore Noura. Zorab Mikhail Detsky. Leonov. Nicola Caputo. Yeah, well, we're going to have to look easy. I don't know anything about this right now. No. We know. We're just listing names that I can't. Brand new news. This just came out like right now.

Just came in, yeah. Ah, fuck. Good. Keep coming. Keep it coming. Keep it pouring. Well, look it up. We'll get back to it. Please email of side stories and l-pot.Sidestores L-P-O-T-L at gmail.com. Is Jeffrey Epstein alive? That's what I keep seeing. There's that new picture of him with that beautiful hair. Yes, the beautiful hair. I think it's fake.

They're saying he's walking around Tel Aviv. How about the picture of his dead body with the tattoo? I think that it's fake. I think that the pictures of him on the operating table are fake because there's a picture with none of his tattoos on his left side. Okay, so you think the picture itself is fake and it's like... I think that the tattoo picture is fake. Okay, cool. All right, all right.

That is my personal belief. I don't think. Jeffrey Epstein is still alive. I don't think he is either. I think he's dead. Yeah. Personally, I think he's dead. I don't think there's any reason to keep him alive. People do want you to react to this picture. Oh, yeah. There's a guy who looks similar to Epstein, long hair, walking around Tel Aviv with security. We don't know who the guy is.

Can I say what was probably an extremely inappropriate thing? I don't think he has that unique of a face in Tel Aviv. I don't think he has that unique of a face in these communities. I think that Jeffrey Epstein is not different enough looking. But who's the guy then? Anybody? The nostril does match up very closely. There are certain things that match up

really closely, but I don't know. With AI, who the fuck knows that? Who knows now? I think that with Jeffrey Epstein, I think they killed him dead, or they allowed himself to kill himself dead. What the crazy thing is, is that after these last set of emails, everything is not

off the table. Of course. Everything is like in play now. But now we're going to wrap up this segment, I promise. We just said we weren't going to talk about the entire episode. We've almost done this the entire episode again. We're going to wrap this up again by remembering they have stripped all context from these files. There is very little to fully discern just from the files alone. Yes.

It is not concrete evidence that someone's name is in these files. Just because they are in there does not mean they are necessarily guilty of crimes. It's just use your fucking head. again, when you're reading stuff, imagine, try to put a human body in the facts. When you walk around, walk around in that person's shoes. Try to corroborate what you can, when you can. And if not, just be like, that's interesting. Bank it and wait for something else to pop up.

Because so far it really has been. That's kind of the stuff that's really the craziest part about all of this is that there is starting to think. are starting to connect. Yes. Just don't stop talking about it. If the president tweets something racist, unfortunately it's not out of the norm. Keep focusing on the FDFSI. He's racist. What a shock.

Oh, whoa, he's racist? No fucking way. All right, we got to all right, let's get to news. All right, news are my favorite story of the week. I mean, we had the, you know, Super Bowl was this weekend. It was. A lot of people love the bad bunny, you know, Green Day performed. That's good. It's good.

Apparently the Seahawks one. I didn't know until I, until late in the day, I was very proud of myself. I only watched the halftime show. Yes. Two years in a row. But that being said, there was an alternate halftime show. A lot of people think we're talking about Kid Rock, not talking about Kid Rock. Never.

We're talking about the Puppy Bowl. Now, the Puppy Bowl every year, normally that happens. It's for charity, right? The idea, or it's also to adopt these dogs. Yes. And so I guess this year, one of the valiant women, which is truly one of the most inspirational stories in the country and everyone was so happy to see. Tegan that I believe was, it was obviously some, it is a corgi mix of some type, really small.

A Sheltie Corgi mix in a wheelchair. And if you looked at the video in the Puppy Bowl, it's mostly Sheltie. I don't think it's Corgi. It won the Puppy Bowl, but I feel like a lot of the dogs might have had something kind of let it win in a way. Yes, Teigen was a member of Team Fluff. The reason we're talking about Teigen is the puppy bowl was two days ago and Teigen's no longer with us. So these fucking pieces

of shit. Yes. Did what has happened to me on personal things? As you wear a t-shirt with your favorite crippled dog. I wore Luffy today to be more positive. Is Luffy alive? I mean it's Dubai. You can never literally, you can't trust any words coming out of there. But Luffy is why I wore Luffy today to represent Tegan. So what they did was that they filmed the puppy bowl four months ago.

Which blows my mind that the puppy bowl is not live. I don't know why I care, but I'm pissed off. I'm honestly, I'm pissed. Yeah, I'm pissed. Yeah, why? Why is it not live? You have one job. Yeah.

You can't fucking film puppies for half an hour? You literally, it can't be live. What are you talking about? So either way, beside it just that, that's one thing. The puppy bowl's fucking pre-recorded. For what? To cover up lip-sinking? Right?

For what? What is it going to do for a delay in case one of the dogs starts raping one of the other ones, I guess? Even though it's pre-recorded. If a dog dies, they don't film another one. So what happens, so what happened was that someone reached out to do a commercial with Tegan, the wheelchair-bound puppy. Again, Doug Flutie of wheelchair-bound dogs, never won a Super Bowl. Can't? Oh, wow, yeah, not even.

The Michael Vick. Dog flutie, please. Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, sir, sorry. The Michael Vick. Yes. Of wheelchair-bound dogs. Yeah, because he's killed all the other dogs. Yeah, he knows his competitor.

He's a real competitor. They, they say we want them to be part of this commercial for other wheelchairs or dog wheelchairs. The pet wheelchair maker, K-9 carts reached out to ask if this dog Tegan could be in the puppy bowl. so they can promo their wheelchairs for dogs, which I think is great. And I think it's wonderful that we promo wheelchairs for dogs because dogs deserve wheelchairs. They deserve an extra chance at life.

It's the cutest thing in the world. Maybe this dog shouldn't have been participating in the puppy bowl considering it died shortly afterwards. So right after the puppy ball, Tegan fucking dies. They then proceed to show us America, a dead fucking dog. That's right. That's what we did.

We all participated in truly, one of the more, besides mass shootings, political insurrections, I think truly one of the biggest tragedies of the social media age is this phenomenon. Do you know that every contestant in the first puppy bowl is dead? How about that? You think about that? Where are they now? They're in the ground.

They're a bunch of dust. Every puppy bowl. 2005. I can't watch this. If any of these dogs are still alive. I can't watch this, Rob. It is the saddest thing on the face. Yeah, we all love her.

And we wanted to adopt her. Yes. No, grip your dogs. I'm surprised this dog didn't die at my house. I have no idea why. We only kill old dogs at my house. Why in the living? Fuck!

You wouldn't reshoot this. Was it named after Chrissy Tegan? Oh, not that bitch. No. It can't be. Oh, my God. I just, I'm so upset. Because it's just also the way they, they're like, yeah, she died.

Yeah, she died. Why is it not alive? Yeah, she died. It's easy. I guess it's just because it's like if she died today, they would be, it would be worse. Well, the, I'm not reading this. This is literally the saddest thing I've ever seen. All right.

Oh, get this off here. I took her home and set everything up for her. She could continue getting her fluids. and oxygen, the rescue center works. I checked on her every day for two hours to change her position and flush the catheter. Oh, okay, yeah. I started to get tailwags when I talked to her. Oh, yeah, no, this is good.

This person's a fucking saint. Yeah. I checked on her during every two hours. After the last check, I could see that she was tired. Not long after that, she took her last breath. That's poor puppy. Jesus fucking. It's a poor puppy.

But, like, I mean, come on. Like, this dog, I mean, we hate child. stars. I know. The puppy bowl, do I now hate the puppy bowl? Is that what happened? We need to change this. We've been talking about this. Do you know there's a dog bowl? Well, you know that the Westminster

Dog Show has now added like an athletics portion? Oh, great. I think we're going to go harder into the Westminster Dog Show. I'd rather watch that than the goddamn Super Bowl. I think that we should go harder into that. I mean, there's just as much corruption, inbreeding and rape as in any other

trafficking world in the In the dog breeding community. Oh, absolutely. But it's cuter results. It is cuter results. Oh, champ shouldn't be judged. Champ, you're okay. Champ, you'll be judged.

You would kill all the other dogs. I hope you'd kill them. Yeah, we love champ. Champ. Champ could have been in the puppy bowl. Not next year. Next year he's got to enter the Dog Bowl. Yeah, honestly, that'd be awesome. The Dog Bowl has senior dogs on it.

That's really cute. I'd love to see that. I actually adopt that. I love that. Adopt senior dogs. Right from your grave. Now, in some happier news, in one of the most metal articles I've ever read of my wife.

Okay. An Olive Garden cook was rushed to a hospital. This happier news? Yes. Okay. After this man cooking an Olive Garden, he was so sad, I think, that someone, I think someone actually reached the end of a never-ending pasta bowl. And he was so sad,

and he thought he's like, I could have everybody so full. We know how they're all Italian. Oh, you know, Italy, they're straight from Italy. Now, Oliver Garden, they're straight from Italy. And he was just like, oh, I got mad at too much of your soup. I need to do something. Oh, I waste all the men is thrown.

He was super sad about something. And he decided to take matters into his own face by the authorities are describing a suicide attempt by sticking his head. in the friar.

He died of his wounds. I don't think he died. No, he died. Oh, really? Because the article I'm reading says he's alive. Oh, that is true. That is rough. So he's going to have tortellini face for the rest of his life?

He's going to be like, what's his name for preacher? From what I understand is the man lived. Oh, I want to be it artincini. Oh, let me be an art ofini. Oh, the cook did kill himself. Yeah, you think he died. Yes. I mean, honestly, because they're not releasing the name as they shouldn't be, and I'm happy they are because like, he just, he should be ashamed for trying to commit suicide. Why are they calling it a suicide attempt?

Because he, when, he died. He apparently, it's not an attempt and suicide. So what he did. I'm sorry to, for semantics here. I think it's because he died after the fact. I think it can still be an attempt, even if it can be a successful attempt. Oh, all right. I think that, so according, they think, they know it was suicide because multiple staff members,

called screaming for help to 911 and saying a chef got super agitated, ripped off his clothes. And again, I think it was because he's like, I used to this chickabombers jar. And I thought the Italy is the most beautiful one I ever made. There's no way he was speaking anything with Spanish. And then he went, and he reached over. He dropped some ravioli and he went, oh, and he farted on the tort of Italy. He's like, oh, no, I farted on a torte Italy. You can't do that.

No, he was so ashamed. And then he rooped off his clothes. and they said that then they were screaming. 911 calls, all they heard was screaming. He just shoved his head into the friar. Yeah. Which is just fucking, it reminds me of the, the Mr. Show sketch.

You remember that? Do it again. Head first this time. Do it again. You remember that? It's a heavy metal. It's like the guy that said, it's sketches about David Cross

plays a super fan of a heavy metal band. in a hospital bed. Oh, I remember this. He's just ahead. And the rest of him's all burnt. Yes. Yeah, and it's just kicking around. I do remember that.

That was very cute. That was oddly cute. It's very funny sketch. But it's just... As a cook, this is the worst way to go. Yes. But I am surprised that he did die because I feel like this would just be something that would, you know, you put your head in and then your body would just rip it out.

I think that you immediately get such systemic... You would have to swallow it. I think that it goes up your nose. I think that it goes up inside of your sinus cavities. I think it burns you in a truly horrific way. Friars are crazy, man. We used to always, when I was an old cook, we used to like, when someone wasn't paying attention,

you throw some ice in there so it explodes on them and they get burned, which is a fun little game that a lot of cooks like to play. He did finally. He did pass. Okay, he did pass. But yeah, he did. Yeah, that is just rough. I'm not going to read his name,

but it's in Pennsylvania, which is also a sad way to die. Olive Garden. Yeah. You know. Do you think it was still, do you think they finished the day or do you think they closed the restaurant? Apparently they did close for the day. Okay. And they opened up the next day. Yeah. See, they took a pause. And

the guys, they were like, hey, listen. Because you know, the boss came down. He was like, everybody, come around. We know, just like my mama made. When my mama died, it was one of the craziest things I had ever seen. My mama, she fed a breast to force into a

Masorado machine. Mer twist to the breast, a restaurant, twists and turn the breast, making them into a mauselera machine. We all said that, we cry,

we cry, we cry. But we know we cannot close a restaurant. People are making lunch. Nobody cared that your mama breast turn into antibasa. Yeah, when my mama die, I keep the restaurant open,

and when this guy die, I know we are all a family. Family. But sometimes family commit suicide. Come in suicide. Right? And so they did,

I think, The restaurant was closed for several days after the incident. But it has since reopened. Yeah, it's reopened. Because, you know, you got to clean out that oil, that. You definitely got to clean it out. But that only takes a day. Are you going there?

Am I going there? Are you going to go? If I know that they got a new friar, I think you... Do not think that the literally, the entire system needs to be pulled out. Yes, I do. You can't just have human... You could cook human flesh. All right.

You could clean it and you could reuse it. Yes. And nothing would happen to any of. of us. Are you absolutely sure? Yes. No. Right? I am sure. Well, you have your food handler's license. Yeah, you boil it. I mean, lots of shit goes into friars and they get cleaned. Even human flesh. There is, I think that it is not ideal. But I think that the chemicals that clean the friar do a good enough job where you would not know if someone cooked their head in a friar after you clean it. But I know from the news. That's what I believe. I know from the news and I know from the yes.

Help reviews. Yeah. You mean to tell me from then on. Because talking about putting the Yelp and Yelp. This is literally what it's for. Don't go here. Chefs commit suicide here. Yeah, well, I mean...

Also, using the word chef. It's not a chef. It's a real liberal. He's a cook. Yeah, he's a cook. He's a cook. He's not a chef. I'm actually even surprised they have a friar.

Well, they got to fry the raviolis. I'm surprised it would all be pre-done. Chicken Parm, you know, all that's got across. Even if it's like pre-made, you drop the chicken cutlet in the fire. I thought all kind of went in like the Starbucks-style convention oven. I bet they have French fries. God, that's sad.

I bet that fry. I bet they have French fries. Guys, can I all say this? And I mean this, and I'm really not saying this in a snobby way. You've got to end Olive Garden. Really? Why is it still exists? It is by far the worst. It's fast food Italian. It is the worst. Take a moment. I'm going to say this. It's a great place to drink underage. I used to drink

underage there all the time. In a very Florida way, I've been to Florida. In Florida. Yeah. I'm just going to put it this way. I've been to Olive Garden for both a wedding reception and a funeral. Yeah.

It makes me feel the same way. You know, the thing about Olive Garden is I don't want to shame you if you go to Olive Garden. No. But the fact that there are better things to get that are not all that are the same level of Olive Garden you can get. There is an Olive Garden in Times Square that is extremely popular and nothing has made me more mad about. anything. Like, you could go the heart of Italian food is in New York City.

But it's also not in Times Square. There is some, there is good Italian food in Times Square. We went to that really good place. Restaurant Row. We went to restaurant row, but you have to carefully choose which one in restaurant. It's New York City! But some of them are better than others. I bet there's 25

options within a mile of Olive Garden that are better than Olive Garden. They are all, literally all better than Olive Garden. Yeah. It's me. It is literally made out of cat me. Well, if you or someone you know is considering suicide, contact 988. Suicide and Crisis

Lifeline by dialing 988, text 988 to the crisis text line 741, 741, or go to 988. And they're not going to tell you how to do it. They don't tell you how to do it. No, I don't think so. Great. I think that, you know, I don't know, call. Okay, so

this is this story I want to cover really quick because this is the scariest thing I've read. All right. So this is, this week, and literally, outside of the Eps and stuff, because there's really nothing we can do about it. So this is some of the... And it's done. And it's done.

It's kind of already happened. So this is some of the... This is really scaring the fucking shit out of me. And why I don't do Airbnbs anymore? So several people who stayed in Airbnb in Las Vegas fell seriously ill. Deathly ill. Deathly. Very, very ill.

After a temp led FBI and police to uncover an illegal bio lab in the home's garage. So this was run by a guy named Ori Solomon who is from Israel. He is an Israeli citizen who also happens to be able to be a super of several. He's not here on a work visa. No. But he happens to be able to run all of these establishments

where he is the super. He runs these Airbnbs. In Vegas. I didn't even know Vegas had Airbnbs. I mean, it's rough. Summerlin, you can get out there. I like it out there. But Ori, he is the only way to really describe

Ori Solomon is that he looks like a villain from that, what was that Hallie Berry, Hugh Jackman movie? Oh. He looks like he's from the film Swordfish. He's got that, yeah, he's got Bleach Blondea hair, weird six-year-old man with bleach blonde hair.

Very frightening. Yeah. He was a suit, all these people were... Another one with a nice mouth. We're getting a lot of nice mouth people here. You might have been gotten to some objections. Honestly, he was working with another guy named David Hur. That is a pseudonym for a guy

that it's like his English name. Honestly, I can't really pronounce his Chinese name. He's a Chinese national. He's been connected to the Communist Party of China that was also arrested in California for another biolab that was shut down in early January. So this has all been kind of coming on. I guess it was like a couple of years ago. What is the point of having your own private bio lab?

It seems that whoever is doing this, for whatever reason that they're doing this, Lori Solomon's doing. He's saying it's not his. But it was just in his garage. Is that they are hosting COVID-19 samples, HIV, norovirus, Ebola. Denang fever. Like, literally, they are hosting a bunch of viruses. They are literally just holding on to a bunch of viruses for research.

There's also a thousand mice there. I will say, at the bare minute, The Airbnb shouldn't have a thousand mice. My main thing is like many dead crickets. I'm so over it. I'm so over it. Every Airbnb has a locker room. Do you think you have to scrub the tiles before you left?

Oh yeah. You know you have to scrub the tiles and you have to fucking... Leave it there. We're looking for more bio, please. You literally go pick up his kids from school. You know what these Airbnbs are. I am just, this idea of going to one of the... I am so sick of it.

Every time... They always have some locked room. They always have a locked room And it's deeply frightening I said an entire house I want access to the whole The whole thing It's 13 cameras

That's all you think of as the movie 13 cameras When you have just a room I can't enter What's 13 cameras? Is that sliver? It's a basic no I wish That's a sexy movie This is about a movie

It's like a weird fucking guy That has a house Where he spies on women Did you like it? Yeah Hell yeah It's great It's so disturbing

I literally can't show now Oh, wow. That's fun. Because Natalie will never stay in a hotel ever again. More charges are against Solomon are likely. It is unclear Tuesday. He's been released, though. Yes. He's released, so they don't know.

But they made him promise not to go anywhere. Yes. Well, they took his passport from him. Oh, wow, because these guys are just top tier. We just have some of the best guys on this right now, especially for Israeli citizens. Oh, they are on it. They got this guy.

clamp down. There is no way this guy's doing anything. Even though also it's weirdly connected to another Chinese spy being arrested in Riverside. Really? Very strange. Very interesting activity flying around. There's a lot of stuff going. You know, what's good

about this is what's happening now that it's easier to check on everybody. Now that Big Brother is in and watching us all the time, it's kind of easier to catch people doing bio labs. I know, but also, especially when they're renting it out to people. Just stops there. Yeah, they put it on Airbnb. Yeah.

It's not even like a private service from some millionaire. It was just the fridge was filled with weird vials. And I just... People got sick. I'm just done. I'm done. I'm not going on vacation anymore. I hate vacation.

You love vacation. No, I like not working. Yes. I hate going places. It is true. You don't like actually, you know, it's hard to get you out of the house. I'm thinking about it. I go out more, but it's like if I'm in L.A.

I'll go out. Yeah. It's just I'm done. I hate going places. Yeah, like when the fires came, I was like, hey, I'm going to Oceanside, I'm going to go chill by the beach. And you're like, I'm going to burn inside my house. Yeah, I mean, that's just because I'm not leaving that house.

That's wild. Yeah, I'm staying in the house. I don't care about anything that much. It's because you were a renter. When you buy a house, I became a boomer during that very small window. I became one. I felt it.

I was like, I'll stand out of here with a fucking host. But no, Natalie would have me. me a vacuum. Well, Airbnb hasn't really... Oh, they haven't commented? No, I wonder why. I wonder why. They have a comment. Another thing I do want to bring up a... Oh, it's scare B&B. Come on. What are we doing? Honestly, I'm never going again. Never going in, whenever fucking again.

This one is a big one. Serial pooper. Oh, yeah. Caught. Cot. What I love about this story is the fact... Serial defecator. Oh, you're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. Now, this is in Madison, Wisconsin. Apparently, we've now seen this a couple of times. I was just in Madison. I didn't see any shit on the ground.

It's because normally they keep it in their little white butts. But this woman put it out there. I love that it's a woman, by the way. So this was a common trail, right? They were going, the Stoughton Police Department and had received reports from this. I guess they had found human feces and used toilet paper in a park. Yeah.

So it had been shitting in the same place. wiping themselves, bringing toilet paper to wipe. That's the thing. If you didn't leave the toilet paper, they probably wouldn't have got caught. The toilet paper is what makes you a fucking weirdo. In this scenario, SARS, I'm concerned.

You should walk out of there with the shitty ass. If you're going to shit in public, you should take the punishment of having a shitty ass. Have you heard, did you hear the story? I believe we might have covered this. I'm going to right before you joined the show. Uh-huh. Of a,

I believe it was a high school sports coach that was also caught doing the same exact thing where they found loose stool on a track every morning. Yes. And eventually the coach had to come out and say, I've been having stomach issues. This has become a thing I do. But why not use the bathroom?

Because he's a fucking disgusting bastard. Right? So this guy, this lady, it seems to be of the same. So there were so many poo, right? There was, he said he was, oh yeah, it was the superintendent. Yeah, he was the gay. He was shitting on the school's football. field. Wow. You have to really go out of your way to be the superintendent to go to a random

high school field and shit on it. I forgot he was like the boss of bosses. I guess you just feel really fucking confident. Man, that's power. That is. That's true power. That's what I mean, that makes me want to be a superintendent. I'm a shit in her parking lot. Yeah, he's more of a poop. The mugshot is hilarious. His mugshot, he is serious. But this lady, they're not releasing the information about the Madison, Wisconsin cereal shitter. I guess because they've decided to, because they're just giving her a ticket for indecent conduct. The reason why we're even talking about

this is that there was so many reports about this Duky being on this trail that the fucking cops put out a drone. Like she was Osama bin Laden. They got her with an infrared camera. They were drunk, yeah, and they caught her

and he literally see her in a thermal suit, like literally I'm not joking, it's like Seal Team Six came looking for her and she's got her hands up sorry she just looks like she's been

like she's O.J. Simpson like she's been caught after a long manhunt but they just gave her a ticket for indecent conduct. I mean she must really wanted to do it. This is Madison Wisconsin. It's cold. February. This isn't July.

Do you think there's something to do like with like her smelly poops? Well, maybe she really wants to look at it because sometimes when you poop in the toilet, you can't always see it if it gets a little cloudy, you know? And so, like, if it gets a little cloudy or you put some toilet paper on it, you can't really see your poop. So maybe she wanted to go poop in the snow, have a nice white canvas. And then she could really check out what she was putting out there. If you can't see your poop ever, if you're always shitting fine mist, that's a problem in and of itself.

I mean, I'd say I can't see one out of ten poops. Oh, yeah, I mean, that's normal. Yeah. That's different. Yeah. But every time I can't see it, I'm sad. I know that much. That's how I know if I'm sick or not.

Oh, yeah. Tell me if I'm happy or not. Honestly, can I, a controversial statement? Please. I like diarrhea. It doesn't bother me. Everyone's like, oh, I got diarrhea. It's bad.

I'm like, oh, go for you. It's because you live in a developed country and you have access to water. That's true. I know I'm not going to die. Yeah. And it's for us. It's time off. Exactly.

When I have diarrhea, time off from life. Time off from my wife. At least 20 minutes. Time off from work. Yeah. Time off from all of you. Where do you think I've come up with all the material for the stream? See?

It's when I'm streaming. Double stream. I'm streaming. You're streaming. We're all streaming. We're creaming. We're dreaming. We're professional.

We're never not working. All right. So don't worry. This lady's been taken off the streets. Yes. From her big Culver's fueled. runny dumps and I will say she was she definitely was a unit of a woman

so I imagine you could really see she's got I mean they really shouldn't put the weight on there that's a shame yeah what are you gonna do I mean do do do that's what you do no save it yourself put it in your butt save in your fucking butt

well do we have any listener mail today people actually care about us still we got the good oh of course they do We're all they have Are you horny, Henry? Yes, sure Now it's time for listening to our email

I don't get sick of it Nice, so are we deciding that's the one we're sticking with forever? For now I think I kind of did, yeah, I love that one It's a really good one It's my favorite one Are people still sending in new ones? We haven't gotten any in a little while

But I mean, I'm content right now I am pretty content I really love it So can we officially stop the ask for new listener email stings? Unless one comes in that's particularly good. Yeah. I don't stay, man, I'm open. I'm open. All right. I would like to

see something a little more funky. I mean, that's pretty funky. It is pretty funky. We want straight funk. I want straight funk. Yeah. Something in the pocket. Okay. Submissions are open. Yeah, submissions are open. I guess.

I like that one. Yeah, I want some Billy bass inspired stuff. Yeah, because he just passed. He did just pass. All right. Peabilly base. Let me see if one of these are good. I guess I read this. The paper mills all right? I like this one. I'm going to do the radiation pranks. Okay, the radiation pranks, which are always fun.

Listen to the Bob Lazar episode today, and when you guys covered his prank with the helium-filled bags with radiation labels on them, it would remind me of a prank in a similar vein that was told to me while I was serving in the Navy. Often, the aircraft carrier nuclear powered these days would carry Marines on board

to transport them. They'd have their own bunking areas, sort of sequestered from the rest of the crew. There was some nerd versus jock things going on between the Marines and the pale, sickly-looking nuclear attacks, who never saw the sun and worked 20 hours a day in Pete's time. One night, a couple of nukes got some radiation suits, a few pails filled with ball bearings, and a handful of chem-like glowsticks. They activated the glow-sticks, mixed them in thoroughly into the ball bearings, and smeared what was on their hands all over their suits.

and the dead of night they opened the door to the Marines bunk room threw in the ball bearings making a ton of noise while yelling neutron spill neutron spill everybody everybody out neutron spill

dozens of Marines jump out of their beds ready to fight half naked slipping on the ball bearings and glow stick juice trying to figure out what was happening pretty sure they all got their asses kicked eventually but the story is legend now I'm going to see it's fucking awesome That is great. That is a hell of a prank.

My dad used to do, like, he ran a real McHale's Navy. He had a real McHale's Navy experience while he was serving in the Navy. Yes, I can't imagine that. That your dad's Navy was all pranks. He did not have a serious Vietnam. You know, and I think, I'm glad. Because he didn't need anything to make him grumpier. No, certainly not.

You know? Because my uncle Kevin, who also just passed. Yeah. And we were, we had been talking for a while. but he had served in Vietnam. And he was, yeah, honestly, you know what his worst tour was? Brunch! The worst!

Actually, he was a POW for two years. They thought he was dead. He had a problem with Asians ever since. You know, I don't... What are you going to do? Hey, I try to convince him. I was too young. I love Nintendo, Uncle.

Yeah, hey, how bad could they be? Even though it's a wrong type of Asian person. Let's all say goodbye to everyone. What a wonderful day it's been. That's so nice to see all of you. Just live another day so you get to read more Epstein emails. That's right. Get in there.

Start Googling your friends. And then you start moving on to people you admire and then people you hate. Yeah. I would love for you to save the people that you hate for the end. because then it's nice to have some laughter as dessert. Yes. I still can't believe Woody Allen. I am still shocked.

I was really old now. I was shocked to see Woody Allen's name. Oh, last comic book on the Love, volume four, pre-order soon. You're going to want to check that out. It is on our website. This thing is one of the best things we've ever made. It is finally coming out thanks to Z2 and ours publishing efforts. And you will see the conclusion of my little tale on Detective.

popcorn that I worked on with Elliot Rohall. It's honestly, you're going to love it. Very cool. It is really fucking good. Also Miseducation of Ed Larson is on the Patreon. New show, new show, new show, new show. 10 dollars and up on the Patreon. Go check it out, patreon.com slash last podcast on the left.

You can still pay to get ad-free audio episodes of the shows. And you get first dibs on tickets. Merch, you also go ahead and be a part of last stream on the left, which is live every 6 p.m. Every Tuesday, PST.

It is live. And once a month, if you're part of the $25 tier, you can submit videos and gross us out. Other than that, fuck it. Fuck it. Have a good time. Henry and I, we're going to, next week, we're going to be in Alaska. We're going to be in fucking Alaska.

Freezing or ever-loving balls off. I have to buy more clothes than money I'm going to make. We are, oh, just on the gear alone, I broke even. Like I just bought here. I have nothing. Well, we're sold out in Anchorage on the 20th, but please come see us in Fairbanks on the 21st. I'm also going to be doing a brunch show, apparently. So keep your eyes peeled for that with Billy Wayne Davis.

It's going to be a blast. March 14th, we're going to be in Urbana, Illinois. Then we're going to Illinois. I'm sorry. And then April 26th, Lexington, Kentucky. Netflix is a joke. Henry and I are doing a show at the Avalon at 945. That's going to be on May 7th.

Come out, baby. Check us out there. Rochester, New York, May 30th, and London, Ontario on June 28th. And then, of course, a week from today, I'm going to be over at the Punchline with Grant Gordon. That's on February 18th in San Francisco. Please come out and see that.

April 3rd, I'm going to be in L.A. at the Lyric Hyperion with Amber Nelson. And then P. Funk Fest on April 11th and Vistar Stadium, Jumbo Shrimm Stadium, April 12th. Come party with me. I fucking love you people. Rock and roll will never die. Fuck, yeah, dude.

We'll see you out there on the ice. Yeah. All right, fuckers. Hail Satan. Hell Satan. Death Bull's still rocking. Oh, yeah, dude. Death Bull's still rocking.

Because, you know, what was the one that just, who was just coughing? Captain O'Hara passed away. Well, that we know. That was extremely sad. Yes. Andy Dick's not looking good. Of course he's not looking good. But I'm saying, you might have a very good run on your very first get on the death.

Well, that's actually, it's bad for me. me though, because I have to lose $1,000. But it's good for whatever Andy Dick dies of. Yeah, we should mostly be... Dick disease? Mm-hmm. It's shot in the head. Yeah, I'm just going to send it to penises. What's wrong on Mitch McConnell?

Did he die? I heard he's not doing good. Yeah, Mitch McCollop, but we did know politics because we said we'd have to keep it even. I just heard he's dying. No, we know. We can't wait. No, we're all excited. He's been dying for a decade. Yeah, honestly, fucking hurry up. He looks like his bones already left his body. Bye.

come. I hope that you, I hope you enjoy hell. All right. Well, who else is a puddle that's going to die soon, Rob? I don't know. We'll see you guys next week. Joe Biden. Yeah. Live one day longer than Trump, you piece of shit.

I just knew. I knew. God damn corn pop. Keep your kids out of Chuckie cheese. Yeah, keep your kid on Chuck your cheese. Okay. I'll suck him in there. I'm going to fuck him in there. Thank you.