Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: Sincere Stories

Episode Date: June 11, 2025

Henry & Eddie bring you this week's weirdest stories and true-crime news but first the boys send some love to Los Angeles, THEN the Devil of the Ozarks back behind bars, Russian student dead after gym class javelin mishap, The Death of famous gator Flat Creek Floyd, 11 Banned Baby names, the boys remember Sly Stone, Listener Emails, New Tour Dates, and MORE! For Live Shows, Merch, and More Visit: www.LastPodcastOnTheLeft.comKevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Last Podcast on the Left ad-free and a whole week early. Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus.

There's no place to escape to. This is the Lost Ark. On the left. Sign stories? That's when the cannibalism started. SIGN STORIES! Yes. Wow! Yes! Ah, City of Angels.

Ah! Nothing like a nice peaceful afternoon in the city of Los Angeles, my friend. Oh, yeah, man. I can't wait to fucking wrestle a Marine, man. It's about time, man. It's public, too. This guy from the Coast Guard, he came to my house, right? It was him with his ice guy, right?

And he came over and he was just like, are you harboring any refugees? I was like, yep. Yeah. You gotta come get them. They're in the back and I brought them back into the house Obviously, right car me and Wendy. No, no, no, absolutely not. They they're still their blood They're they born in they're born in and then I told him to sit and wait here, right? It's in that put them living room I get poured him some coffee and some treated real nice room. Yeah Yes, yeah to be funny, right? I mean I winked at him and then I went inside right? I went in the back of my back area and then I came back out and I was completely fucking naked Yeah, like which is my my get-go. Yeah, you're at home. I said, yeah

I was like just so you know if you want these refugees Both you boys are gonna have to tag team me and make me go Yeah, you're gonna have to make me shoot and so what you're gonna have to Eiffel Tower this sobrowski Yes, and I said this said these two guys. I was like, this is not a joke here They hate the Eiffel Tower because it's in another country. They hate it because of what it represents over there It represents a shitty ladder, right? It's a bad It's a bad building and so so they looked at me, right? And I just said if you want these refugees you're going to have to please you're not the pleasure me

You have to make love to me. Yeah, and They started you jumped right in right because obviously they're good at it because again these boys they're just around men all day Yeah, yeah And they get cock sucking experts they get really good at making love to each other And so this guy came at me, and so they were going, but I kept correcting him, because I said, be more like a lady. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Be more, think you're a lady. Yeah, use these cuffs. Yeah, think that you're like, you're a lady, you know? And eventually I had to make him leave. I was like, get the hell out of here. Yeah, I tried to zip tie my balls to my cock, and I'm like, they're already right next to each other. Honestly, we don't even need to do this.

Yeah, escalate more, thank you. That's what I'm saying. they're already right next to each other. Honestly, we don't even need to do this. Yeah, uh, escalate more, thank you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what I'm saying. Welcome to Side Stories. My name is Henry Zabrowski. I'm sitting here with Ed Larson. How you doing? Perfectly safe.

Everything's fine. Legitimately, we just want to open up today's show by saying, fuck ice, fuck the Marines, fuck the fucking Coast Guard. I love the good ones. I like... All right, all right, all right. Let's scale back for two seconds. Don't fuck... don't that fuck the fucking Coast Guard. I love the good ones. I like. All right, all right, all right. Hold on. Let's scale back for two seconds. Don't fuck, don't that fuck the Marines. Yeah, I like them. I'm fine with the good Marines.

I'm fine with the real men. They have no choice. And the real women of the Marines. These guys are trying to get out of the desert. These poor 700 fuckers are just sitting in Joshua Tree, not allowed to do mushrooms. They're not even. Not allowed to smoke weed. Dude, they're in like riverside like they're in they're not even a good part. Oh, wow They're in 29 palms. That's where the bases. Oh god. What are they matched with amber on hinge? Oh, we I remember I remember They can't they can't close. Yeah, I am a little worried though Cuz these boys are just sitting in the desert doing nothing but push-ups And like they're just ready to fucking punch a liberal in the face

You know what the deserts bad for ice. Yes But no we just want to say that there you're gonna hear a lot of messaging about Los Angeles being a third world country in a war-torn city and Say that to the fact that I grilled this weekend. Yeah, so um there's that they I say that to the fact that I grilled this weekend. Yeah, so um, there's that they all of my friends I was in Disneyland and I was I unplugged completely. Yes, my family was in town. I unplugged completely I'm Disneyland just like I didn't unplug completely. I was definitely like posting pictures of me on rides Like I get back and I'm like, oh the city's being attacked But just so you know, I just,

cause I got messages from people from outside of the state that are all like, oh my God, have they come to burn your home? Oh my God, are the immigrants there to destroy your lives? And honestly, I'm going to say straight up, if immigrants weren't here, this entire city would crumble to the fucking ground. They do everything. They do everything, but stock broke.

They work hard. They work hard and people are just trying to give it a fucking shot. And honestly, the comedians I know that went to the protest, it was an organized protest. It was so, it's kind of what America's all about. America's about the fact that we have set parameters for you to go and express your displeasure with the government and there so this concept of everyone saying oh, it's riots

They're tearing the city apart and then I'm watching a lady with a mommy blog at the protest Yeah, like like the the comedians that went to the protest Yeah, like like the the comedians that went to the protest Are going to a riot? I am just telling you this if you're gonna see social media stuff from the their it's a protest They are the United States government are the ones who are escalating and they are looking for a fight They sent the army here. This is true fascist shit. That's very scary. But also I Just don't think it's gonna work It's not working because the protests are actually very effective I just trying to be as scary as they can be because it's the new thing to scare children and families

The LAPD put out a statement saying that these aren't violent protests and they love kicking the shit out of us You don't think the LAPD would not have taken any opportunity to spray us with bullets? Like honestly? They fucking love it. They can't wait to do it. We have tanks, we have the military. It's here. So again, I'd love to meet a Marine.

I'd love to feed a Marine. I'd love to make a Marine laugh. But I just know that I think any of the good Marines, anybody out there that actually believes in this fucking shit ass country that's built on blood and slavery, anybody that actually believes in that shit wouldn't glisten to a pedophile telling you to attack the personas of the United States of America, the citizens of the United States of America. This is supposed to be a place where people wanna come.

A place where people are gonna wanna come to make their dreams come real, and that's a part of the deal, folks. I'm sorry you're gonna see somebody browner than you. That's called fucking, it's called the world. Also, Marines, while you're in town, literally just scout it for cool places to hang when you're on leave.

Seriously. You're only a couple hours away. We are the hottest city in America. Oh yeah, dude. There is no question about it. We are smoking hot. We are hot. You and I, we're twos here.

Well, the difference is that we're producers. Yes. And that's where we belong. Ugly men belong here. Yes. And the more attractive men, they just become victims of true crime. It's the women that are, and everybody everybody else of any other type of persuasion that are really quite hot here

Yeah, think about that Marines you don't fuck with the city where you're gonna come screw on leaf It's not gonna work out. It's a bad. It's a bad move But this is this this is as sincere as we're gonna get today because I've been getting a lot of messages saying that we have been taken advantage of Our uncle miss yes, and honestly I want to be chill. I won't be cool easy breezy man. Look at me Yeah, whoo, I've been funding shit. You know I've been uh that's it. Where's my money? Well, where is your money? I'm just saying you can give me the money. You're gonna fund me. Yeah, what do you want? What do you want to do? I mean, I just want to eat. I want to give you a jar of weed. Yes, you did

I also bought you a cool alien necklace. You actually you really didn't that was actually very nice. I'm sorry. I take it back A couple of very nice things for me recently Which is very nice, but um, you know what I did. I am a are you ready for this? What I am now a proud member of churla That's right the coalition for humane immigrant rights. Oh I thought that was some big woman's patreon. I know I know that's what I was hoping That's what I thought I signed up for but um yeah, I know I signed Julie and I up where we're members of churla now

I don't know what this means. Yeah, I know Did you get a backpack or something I gave them money, and I think I signed Julie and I up where we're members of churla now. I don't know what this means Yeah, I know I gave them money and I think I gotta go to meetings So I I but I'm a member. I'm great I'm in house if you want to join churla and help people who are getting fucked over by ice Go to churla members ship drive 2025 dot fundraise dot org. I think they misspelled fundraise. I do think that you did.

But it is fundraise. I checked it several times. Yes, very good though. We need to get, you gotta get better, you gotta get better copywriters in there. But that's, I'll also explain, while Eddie did a wonderful thing and joined this wonderful group. Churla! I'm a churla boy!

I'm joining the Hollywood Disclosure Organization, which is... I'm joining that, too. Yeah, this is all about that. I'm joining the group of the most important people in the world, the actors, that are trying to fight for disclosure. UFO disclosure.

Yes. And we're really pulling out all the stops. We're having Zooms. Mm the stops. We're having zooms We're having twitch streams glooms. You're having glooms. It is June everyone's sad about you know, not you know There's no work anymore. Yeah, you have to all talk about aliens. Well, I My fucking world I would rather talk to an actor about aliens in about the fact that they're not working Yes, so to be honest, you should be thankful too. thankful, too Because then we don't have to talk about acting yeah, we you know Rob saw Thomas Jane at the at the contact Smelled Thomas Jane coming he smelled like a leopard is that why the food was so bad dude. He doesn't wear shoes

Thomas James one of those guys he specifically doesn't wear shoes. He is a Smelly boy, he was fine. He wasn't that smelly in the elevator I think it's cuz you were you would deal with that you were just It was the morning. So I think he's fresh out of the shower. Oh, he was very tired He seemed like the kind of guy that does wash himself in like city Structure. Oh, yeah, he'll go up to a fountain, a bank, and he'll wash himself. As soon as he passes the river, he's like, you mind if I pop out, take a quick bath?

Whatever you need, Tom. You were the punisher, after all. Absolutely. A punisher. You're right. One of the punisher. John, John, we all know John Bernthal. Bernthal is the punisher.

Yeah, he is the real punisher. But also, before we move on, I'm very excited for Saturday, No Kings Day. June 14th, go to nokings.org if you wanna protest. If you wanna organized, safe protesting. It's all over the country. You go ahead and type in your zip code. I could walk to mine.

See, that's the best, the big inconvenient. If I could walk to the protest? Done. Are you kidding me? I. Are you kidding? I'll go if I don't have to go to downtown and I can still mildly protest I bring sandwiches you guys are making fun of Los Angeles for this garbage and I have to I've seen this before I know We do tend to protest before brunch. It's Los Angeles Yeah, but listen Do you have any idea what it takes to add to the schedule of a lazy stoner in Los Angeles? They're willing to go out of their way to protest, there are things wrong in this fucking country.

I don't want to go to any of this shit. He just told me I gotta go do this thing, and if it's down the street for me, I can't say no. You can't say no. I literally have to go. 11 to 1 down the street? That. I can't say no you can't say no I literally have to go 11 to 1 down the street That's convenient Convinced you wake up at a nice time and get a coffee and go and fucking yell at that fucking pedophile

Nothing makes me happier. Honestly. Yeah, no, it's gonna be great. Yeah, the main no Kings protest is gonna be in Philadelphia So if you're anywhere close to Philadelphia go to Philadelphia and join those fuckers they're trying to have that's gonna be an intent that's gonna be the stupid-ass military parade they're holding in DC don't go to DC because they're just gonna count you as someone who went to their parade we'll also know that if you're gonna go to the military parade and protest all the military stuff it's gonna be there yeah so just know that if you're looking to not get sprayed with tear gas or hit with the fucking net or hit with the sound Machine or hit any one of these various things that they're gonna employ around the DC area

It's probably best to make your displeasure known. Yes outside of it. It's for the best. It's for the best All right, so we got some good. That's honestly that's wonderful We got some new live shows new side stories live shows that that is completely does that doesn't help society That's just us go to last podcast on the left comm you're gonna buy those tickets and see Eddie and I flap in our Our bellies and Salt Lake City salt are so Friday June 11th Jordan landing Utah part of Salt Lake City. We're gonna be the wise guys comedy club and I at 930 p.m That's gonna be a blast Thursday August 7th, we're gonna be in Asheville, North Carolina. That's the orange peel. That's for you

That is definitely a bucket list venue for me. I'm very excited always wanted to do I've never been to Asheville I love Asheville. I've heard it's awesome. I's one of the great cities in our nation. I'm very excited. Sunday, September 21st, Kansas City, Missouri. Never been. Man, best meal. The Truman. Still the best meal I've ever had is in Kansas City. We will be back and eating that food. I can't wait to get sick on your barbecue. Kansas City, Missouri. We'll be at the Truman on Saturday, September 21st, October 24th. We're doing it, baby. We're coming back to Redway. That's right Humboldt, Matil Community Center, we're coming for you.

Friday, October 24th. The show that you saw last year is coming back and it's going to be bigger, hotter, and fatter. It better be. I know I am. And November 30th, we're going to be in Columbus, Ohio. That's a Sunday after Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving weren't as excited about that one

I'm very excited. I love my Ohio people. I'm just saying that Columbus, Ohio We know that's Epstein country. So we're gonna be bringing out that Travis is gonna have to open for us Yeah, we don't really have a choice. He's basically said he said along the lines. I think he's like I'm the guy Columbus guy and we're like, all right Travis is open so that's your request because of your your request He's coming to that but more important than these side story shows. I have to say your baby Henry the seance June 20th, it's going to be live on YouTube LPN dash TV on YouTube I believe it starts at

time time 6 p.m.. I imagine it's around 6 p.m.. PST. I think we're going a little bit later I think that might be check out the socials for we got it on the so we'll find out the exact time But it is coming live to our YouTube my calendar says 6 p.m. Yes go and subscribe I should get there like at least an hour early, right? We'll get you there I'll tell you what don't worry. I'll give you the information closer to the people buy tickets Not yet, but they will be able to very limited and I imagine that the tickets are going to be patreon only Okay, and cuz you are going to be able to experience this up close and I do want to say anybody that is

Attending in person this is a very legit seance this is faux real that is doing this and it is the weird part about this oh yeah I was I'm less scared than I was I don't know what changed in me I think it's cuz you're just getting beaten at first I was like oh no I could never and now I'm like who cares if a ghost follows me exactly you're getting beaten yeah Marcus is still scared and I like that. Yeah, I don't think it's that's the thing. It's like what it could have goes really do A ghost pushed my mom down the stairs. Apparently. Yeah, I didn't kill her didn't kill her poker nose though Yeah, but that's different. It's coming good, huh? And I she doesn't drink so something had to push her

Your mom was kind of clumsy Never saw her fall. But you know, she wasn't like an A-U-T-er athlete. No, she couldn't do the hurdles. No, she can't do like a, what do you call it, like an ollie. She couldn't throw a javelin, I'll tell you that much. Very good segue. We're going to bring up that story very soon.

Let's first do an update. Is in the proper fashion of Side Stories, it happened the second we stopped recording. Yes. This man that we talked about how dangerous he was, Grant Harden, former police chief, convicted killer known as the devil in the Ozarks, he was captured. Only a mile and a half from where he escaped escaped from how would they how hard were they looking? This is like he was in a bush That is where he was he wasn't even Saddam Hussein was in a tunnel. Yeah, he was on land Just in a bush live in a groundhog's life. Yeah, no and they just

They just found them. They didn't even have a sure all floppy-titted. Wow. Yeah He lost the shirt. I don't know why should have kept it on he looks got scratched my brand They get he looks so bad. They gave him a shirt. Yeah, they're like, yeah, you know, we're just discussed Oh, yeah, we have to cover you up. You look like the fuck it. What's her name from barbarian? You look like the monster from from barbarian. We have to fucking cover you up. He looked like shit So great hardened has been arrested. You know who got him who? Border Patrol Lucky get and he knows who's nowhere near the fucking border. No, there's certainly not

You know, so yeah exactly. What are they doing up there? What are they doing in Arkansas? I guess it's these are guys stories LP No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, understand. They're like, oh, I'm so proud of our department and staff. He was gone for a week and a half! He was within a mile! A literal errands amount of walking from the prison. It's a 20 minute walk!

It's a 20 minute walk! And he just walked into the woods late. He had no other plan. I guess it's like everybody just assumed you know what it is true. This is the power of lying about how strong you are like as a criminal. Yeah, this is the power because because of the devil in the Ozarks because of how well organized all that was I'm scared of him. I also believe that he probably will if there is a way to figure that out. I bet you that he is guilty for several more sexual assaults probably several more murders

And the fact that it all happened so easily, but he had no plan Everybody just assumed that he would be on a helicopter and Scandinavia He was just like all right, maybe if I had, all right, what hides? He went camping. I had like a mouse. I had a mice hide. Yeah, I go down where the mice hide. That's where I go.

I go down by the dirt. Yeah, I slither, I slither like a snake. Maybe the great spirits of the Native American ancestors are come and turn me, turn me into a snake. Help me when to go And they were like and they just didn't come for him like they came for Pocahontas. No Yeah, yeah, he's a buddy Scott. They got sad. Yes, I'm really quickly. Don't worry about it If you're someone that's scared of him wrapped up wrapped it up wrapped up Sarah. He Sanders is very happy about it Oh good, so she could finally get a chance to go on a date with him or something. Yeah, I'd fucking dumb bitch

I hope she could hit my fucking car. It definitely looked like they have the same tits She's just jealous. She's like who did your work? Oh My god. Oh my god. Is that the Kendall Jenner big lady? It's a Kendall Jenner person That's amazing My god, is that the Kendall Jenner lady? It's a Kendall Jenner person All right, what else we got here because it's sad that's a sad little it's done it's done I mean, what's you know, let's talk about our teas a little bit here then our Javelin Lee. Oh, yes. This all right. So this is one of those stories. This is a quick story.

You know that like, you know when you're in elementary school and you hear like, there's like a reason why you're not allowed to bring basketballs into like the tennis court anymore. Like there's some horrific story from ages past that has like Solidified into lore and now it's like you're like, why do we have this these rules and I always remember as a kid My grandfather had lawn darts. Yes, and we loved them. Yeah, I mean they're fun. They're awesome

Yeah, and then one day they all took them away. Yeah, cuz they're all like it's dangerous Oh, you're gonna fucking get hurt Someone's gonna get killed with the lawn dart. Yeah Yeah, it's horseshoes for you looked up as soon as a Rob looked up lawn dart It just shows all these old timey pictures of kids with fucking lawn darts sticking out of their fucking for Look like hors d'oeuvres at a party. But this story is why these stories get started. Yeah, so this happened in Russia.

Ruska. She was a 13-year-old girl, dies, unfortunately, after being... In Ruska, I believe you can get married at 13. I mean, I feel like you could do lots of shit. I think you can get married, but. I mean, I feel like you could do lots of shit. I think you can get married, but only to a bear. Ah, yes. But the, uh, so the, uh, she was, uh, she was impaled by a javelin during P.E. class

in Russia. Um, this, uh, poor little Anastasia, um, the javelin... Anastasia Ryazenko. She was, she was impaled by the javelin. Try to say the name of the town from the phys ed town the phys ed town It says here now he was she was stuck through the eye through javelin during a phys ed class in Procolardi me Brooke procolardi

Cabaldino Bocca, Bacchorea Russia, uh, would how would you like a medium rare? So, Balkaria, Russia. How would you like a medium rare? So, she unfortunately, she did pass away. She died four days after this happened, because she was in a coma. But I just have to think about what happened to the javelin. The boy throwing it. Yeah, 16, his name was Timur.

He was throwing the javelin, and he was unsuper and he threw it and it landed and it hit her in the eye and it went through her skull and Out her mouth out down her mouth And so it didn't it seems like the reason she didn't die instantly is it didn't actually hit her brain. Yeah Because it comes, you know javelin goes up, and then it comes down. And then down, depending on how bad it goes. Yeah. And it went into her eye and down, out, back,

the end of her throat, and then through her body a little bit. You know, the javelin coach, Vladimir Mershenko, he was, he apparently didn't immediately take her to the hospital. And do you think on some level he was just like, you'll see, Timur, this is why you have to release. Atop of the arc. Yeah You're doing the the most Increase angle

The angle must come at the sharper angle from the top in order to pairs better. You wanted to go through brain Yeah, now is this guy? Promoted to the javelin team or is he off the javelin team? I think he's getting sent to the part of Ukraine It depends on how far away she was. I mean if it's like, okay, let's say 15 yards Maybe he shouldn't get on the team. It's horrible He said that he didn't release that he didn't say the proper amount of warnings cuz I guess you're supposed to like Throw in the fucking javelin if he's a 16 year old idiot who's unsupervised. He's throwing the fucking javelin. If it's a PR

Right if it's a personal record personal record and it breaks some form of record within the I mean technically I think that's the Olympics. Yes I think that if he gets if you if he hit her square in the dome I want to say what's the longest is 90 meter 95 meter that's pretty good. Yeah, 95 if he hit her at like 95 97 meters That's Olympic caliber. Yeah, so I do think that we can let him as I mean the rush because I don't think Ruska's even allowed in the Olympics Anymore, yes, they are. No, I don't think we allowed them the last time don't they have like a separate they are caught cheating I know that I know I thought the ruchkas have a thing where they The the government can't send a sponsored one. Oh, Russia and they were bad. Yeah 2026 winter

But they're back because of the war. I Had a war I think coming. Oh, they're gonna be in Los Angeles. Great. Yeah, they'll be here Where's ice gonna be the worst they're gonna be here? Where's ice gonna be when the Russians are? Oh my god. What about the 12 banned countries? Are they not allowed to be in the Olympics? I Die depends on advertising. Yeah It all depends on advertising and I think it really depends on how doubt the countries are testing Yeah and I imagine of all the Olympics of this would be the best for the Russian because they have One of their people in the top office.

Oh yeah! That would really help them. This is good for them. Honestly, it would really help them. So it's like a home game for Russia. Honestly, I want the people to come, I want the athletes to be able to perform. Yeah. I want them to be able to perform.

They work so hard. They do. They do. They don't know any difference. No. But yes, so this, I'm lady is poor girl did not make it But what a way to go. Oh My god

Nothing like getting turned into a corn dog. Yeah now she's We have a bunch of that's funny we have a bunch of really sad stories that I don't want to go into We have the Travis Decker story that I'm not gonna get into about the three daughters that were zip-tied and he popped Plastic bags over their heads that they could die in their sleep and then he went on a drug-fueled I guess he's on the lam so they're looking for him. Yeah, that's a really upsetting story There's the other upsetting story about the nurse Kevin Kulong who we would sedate He would fondle Women patients where they're sedated because he said he felt that they were flirting with him beforehand

Yeah, he quote said asking for it. He said the answer and then he also said something along the lines of he was sedated They were flirting and that's not how he that's how it does that how they do that unless it's on an astral level yes Again is very difficult to tell if you're flirting astrally again. It's very subtle public beating for him Please also men really take that this is really taking that she was friendly to me Trope way too far. This is a little this is this is this is too far If she has a voice too far, but this is way too far super far If she has like a little happy dream while she's knocked out and gives a little smile that isn't a go for you to give her the old Al Franken right you can't give her the honky honks You can't just give a lady honky honks just because she's asleep we all know this mm-hmm

We all know this Eddie. all know this, Eddie. I know, but Al Franken, I miss Al Franken. We all do, but Al Franken was our only shot at having a good president. Yes, there's also the teenagers in Maryland who killed the owner of a Koi pond for what seems to be no reason. Oh, that is a really also sad story.

Yes. Where they grab that man, it was a couple, they were a high school couple about to graduate from high school I'm going to Notre Dame whoo fighting Irish is that's well, maybe that's what it is. They're getting ready Yes, and then they beat the death an old man They went they stomp this old man Edward Koza Yeah, that did a they put him in his car and then they set fire to him inside of his car. Yes

And that's all funny story either. None of this is particularly about graduate. They were not anymore. No, unless I mean, they can still graduate high school. They can get their GED from from jail. Well, if they already did, if they already passed their finals. So I guess they get their diploma no matter what. I think they get their diploma. Side stories LPOTL at gmail.com if you've had a little use for it But but you've graduated before the ceremony and you kill an old man with your bare hands Do you still get the diploma? Yeah? Did you let us know or maybe or maybe not the physical copy, but you write email PDF Yeah, you definitely learned the info. I think you would if you pass the test. I'd sue the high school. Yeah, why not? If you pass the test I'd sue the high school. Yeah, why not?

Here's another I was them if I was fucking them fuck that fuck them. Yeah, I mean no I did the work Yeah, I killed an old man for the thrill of it. Sure. I did. It was fun for me. Yeah, of course I have no feelings, but I definitely went to biology. Mm-hmm. We have another sad story. Oh great Good added to the pile. Yeah, this was supposed to be the week We came back strong comedically. This was supposed to be the week that we came back with a sort of light-hearted edge To everything that's going on right now Eddie if we do another sad story I don't know if that's gonna really hold up our end of the bargain black creed Floyd was run over by a car Is that a guy that's an alligator? Oh, that's fine. I'm famous. That's a look. Okay, that's an alligator That's why I thought flat Creek Lloyd was just a famous homeless guy. No

Those guys that just would lay in the creek. She's been like don't mind me Yeah, I mean because I don't call him the log man or or mr. Mr Bund banks or you know because that'd be something else I'd give him and if he got hit by a car I'd be sad Yeah, so flat Creek Floyd famous alligator in Georgia. I never heard of him big Old Gator lives he lives in Peachtree City, Georgia. Oh shit Yes, and he was they would try to get rid of him a while ago. He big old boy big old fat alligator I love the size of them. The footage of him is he was huge. He was 11 feet, nine inches long. He weighed about 500 pounds.

Was he in the road? And he was, he lived under an overpass and they kept trying to kill him. And then eventually there was this guy, a trapper named Jason Clark, who was like, we don't, he like talked to the city and he's like listen we need to let Flat Creek Floyd live just let him live we can coexist with Flat Creek Floyd He's just there under the overpass so they let so they let Flat Creek Floyd live But eventually this guy this big motherfucker this reptile guy Eventually, he got hit by a car unfortunately and then when the reptile guy came up to him,

he was literally weeping. Holding, he's like on top of this gator. He loved this gator so much. And he's literally weeping like, I don't want to kill you. It's very sad. I have to because he was bleeding internally. Yeah, sure, sure.

And he knew that Flat Creek Floyd was dying. So he'd snap his neck? Uh, I think he, I think he shot him in the back of the neck. You don't just grab him by the whole fucking throat There's a brain Back and forth you ever watch the show where they like I forget what it was called But it was a it was a Gator killing television show Because like every once in a while you got to kill a bunch of Gators

It's Gator season, you know And you got to kill the game and so what they do is they actually shoot him in the back Of the neck because that's where their brain yeah Yeah, it's over there, and they shoot him in the back of the neck so I imagine that's what Jason Clark did Oh, yeah, he wouldn't just choke him out. I don't think he could have Yeah, it does look like he's just a pillow over his face This is him determining if he has to kill him or not. It doesn't look like he's doing it gently, he said that he the the the Gator was bleeding from the inside and It was time that he had to be you know, honestly though black reed Floyd

Miss you already. I will say he chose to live under an overpass and that's a lifestyle It is a lifestyle and a part of that lifestyle might feature you getting hit by a car. Yes. You know? And i.e. they did their best to try to kill him in a way that I guess they wanted to kill him. But then they let society do it. Yes.

I mean this is, you know, I guess this is the correct way for it to happen. I guess. I don't think so But also I prefer it to have happened naturally. Yes, then them necessarily going and garroting it for no reason They buried him behind the police department. That's extremely I guess that's fine. I guess that's fine. Yeah, sure Yeah, sure run out. You know, again, it's very sad stories Yeah, cuz they had to deal with lots of lots of numerous sightings and they said in lieu of flowers Send big boxes of chum Send big boxes of chum to the Peachtree, Georgia police station. Let's get that address

Maybe we pop that up there if anybody's got any loose chum Go ahead and send it on over. Yeah, if you good they're looking for it. They can't wait to receive your chump. Yeah, but you know, I never like losing a good gator. Nope. No. Nope, it's really very, very sad. Especially ones that hide under bridges. Because that's their job.

Yeah. They're also, again, it's a gator. Where we were just at, we just stayed in a hotel. And it was like, it was in Florida. And there was an active gator area. Yeah, like behind the hotel, which was awesome It was also hilarious because it's just a little sign being like mine small dogs My favorite was where I grew up. There was a sign that told us not to feed magic mushrooms to the Gators Which is just like that. I mean, you know, they start tripping. We can start playing cards and stuff.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Kind of fun. You guys have any fish? Yeah. Yeah. But P.H. B.H. Yeah. Yeah. Would that on please? Honestly, normally I like fish. I'm thinking, you know, let's go to a farmhouse. I feel some fucking anxiety, man.

Listen, hey, fat, hey, fat pink thing. You guys got any coloring books or anything? I Need something to focus my attention. Hey, what do you think about this? It's a good little walk and beat right? Oh, yeah Take that base for a walk now, obviously the most important news of this week. we have covered we've talked about the LA protests we've talked all about and you know the martial war martial law and the insurrection act, but I Think you put the you put the corp and corpse and habeas corpse. I said, thank you. Thank you. It's not perfect Yeah, you fucked that up. You knew corpse and habeas corpse

We're leaving it like this. We're leaving it like this. Fuck you you fat corpse. I am I will leave one But just so you know as of today There has been 11 baby names that have been banned in the u.s. We determine that these baby names are These baby names are illegal! Illegal! Illegal! Now this is true. This is a list of 11 baby names. This is a great find, Rob.

I thank you, Rob, for sending us to this. This is my favorite thing I've read in a while. So these are the names that are not allowed in America. Well, New Zealand and Japan, they ban a whole bunch of names, but America, we can usually get away with everything. We got 11 names. 11 names. You're not allowed to name your baby these 11 names king

Queen why not I guess I don't know I guess it would do assume that you're a day. How dumb are we? Fucking stupid are we said princess? I know why can't you do king and queen? I think cuz prince and princess in the end look at fucking look at the dipshit We have that's working for Spotify Prince means nothing Yes, I mean Prince and princess mean jack fucking shit. It's true King and Queen means something I guess you have to be a special type of moron to think that if I'm King Zabrowski that you need to treat me with some form of monarch like Importance now, can you change your name as an adult to King? I don't, that's a good chance.

That's a good question. Side stories, let's find out, let's find out. Other names, Jesus Christ. Not allowed. Which is hilarious because it's not like your name's not Jesus Christ, it's that your full name can't be Jesus Christ Larson. Yes.

Which is a, I'm sad. Because, hey Zeus, we all know is allowed. I will, huh huh not according to ice Then we got three right that letter the number the Roman numeral III Yes, III I don't know why not one not two not four. Do you think that maybe this is ill? Like illmatic. Yeah, like a license to ill it could be ill I mean could be a capital I and to lowercase L name you can be named ill if you want to be named ill I think that's fucking cool. It is cool. Oh, yeah. Obviously. Yeah, Larson. Yeah, ill Larson the fun-ass man

It is a cool super disrespectful child. Yeah Okay, still done still dumb Santa Claus can't be named for Santa Claus Why not I? Can't don't want to do you idolize Santa Claus and you want to name your fucking kid after Santa Claus then you technically I believe Have a mental disorder Then there's majesty probably same along with same reasons along the lines of King and Queen mm-hmm Adolf Hitler Along the same reasons along the lines of King and Queen mm-hmm Adolf Hitler It's interesting they they put the both that you could still do Adolf apparently and you could still do Hitler

But you can't do it They're just saying you can't be Adolf Hitler, okay Also what I don't understand is Nutella. I mean that's just someone that's like multiple people are like my kids name Nutella. No like someone's like we have to stop this. Is it true for all things? Can I not name my child Charleston Chew? I think Zabrowski. What about Hazel? When the middle name's nut.

That's not that's yeah. I mean that's again your journey. That should be allowed. You're making a stri that's yeah. I mean that's again. You're sure be that should be allowed You're making a stripper. Yes, but you're allowed to you're allowed to Then I yeah Nutella is the name of a difficult woman at the DMV. Yeah This is a what do we do? Alright, so then there's Messiah Which I still think is weird because I feel it gets more of a nickname for Jesus Yeah, then the at symbol

Yeah, the at symbol and then 1069 Understand with 1069 why that matters 1099. I make sense. I'm 420 69 make sense Yeah, this is my son for 20 so I can name my kid 420. What is your in the common air police code? Oh, it's a police code for what I don't know 1069. What is the plan? Oh one eight sevens murder death kill. Yeah Nick I'm 187 on the mother. I don't know the origin of this one October 1969 what happened then I think that was in the end state Beatles did something Why can we not say 1069 I don't know but I do think is interesting is that most Illinois and South Carolina you they can use numbers and symbols in their child's name, okay? That's I don't know you say those things obscene names are banned in New Jersey, which I find very insulting

Yeah, cuz honestly my my aunt cunt would like a word That's a family name what my aunt countries and Judy Got your fucking ass Judy. I know you listen. I know what she's deaf. Oh good Doesn't make her nice. What's so goddamn sure what sign language we're caught I'm looking this up right now. Is it the finger in the hole? I'm looking up right now No, is it just the whole just keep going. Oh, I want to add fine. I want to find out What other names can we add? Oh To the list yeah, I mean I feel like cunt could be out should be on the list

There's no curse words on the list which is very sorry how to sign come about gobles if we're adding Hitler Let's add gobles. I feel like that Goebbels... Mangala. You know what it is is that they are still kind of off-brand. Yeah. To this day. A little inside. Yeah.

Baby programs. All right, just tell me how to say cunt. How about... all right, how about this? You're not doing it. You're just teaching me deaf history. What about a... what about a... Yeah, he's just like, if you want to learn cunt through sign language you got to learn the history you know No No, all right. Oh wait, so this is vagina vagina vagina vagina

Cunt though I think you go like In Mississippi a baby will automatically be given the father's last name unless the parents request a different name I mean, that's kind of more patriarchal everywhere You know what? I love is my favorite one in Florida if parents don't sign a document agreeing to the baby's name The court selects a name This is your son DeSantis Wario This is your son, DeSantis. Wario. This is your son, Strawberry Guava Berry.

Done. Flat Creek Floyd. Cunt ass shit. Ah, fucker, I'm done. All these names, none of these work. You know what would be a good name to get rid of? Keith. You know, what do we think about like a normal name just to get rid of?

Just one band name? Let just to get rid of just one band name Let's just get rid of one like if you got it you get to keep it, but no new Sarah's you know who I'm done with really Brandon I'm definitely done with Brandon. I think we hit our peak. I think Brandon's out. I think we got enough brandon's That's not as we're gonna mix it. We're making enemies. Yeah, sure, but get rid of one of a Brendan Yeah, we're gonna make a Brendan an enemy. I know doesn't Gonna do and it doesn't seem very threatening though. No, I don't think But then we're gonna get like, you know, one of these 700 Marines is gonna be a Brendan

Korean war have come here to die in Los Angeles. I've come here to fight the war right here in Studio City. Edith. Edith is cute. I miss the old names. Yeah. I miss the old names. I miss Rodney. I miss Arasco. I love Aradney. Where's Arasco at?

Who's got the fucking cock to name their child Rodney? Seriously. Where are all the Rodneys? I want a little masculine child. Yeah, yeah, yeah. To be named Rodney with a chain or not. I think Rodney actually be a cute girl's name. Why not?

I'd be a cute girl's name. Rodna. Ew. Ew. Names Rodna. Yeah, I totally like Rodney. I'm here to smoke. Rodna. Ew. Ew. Name's Rodna. I told like Rod. I'm here to smoke cigarettes and lick ass. You know the sign language word for cunt?

It's a picture of me. Oh, these are the most popular names. Olivia, I got a niece named Olivia. Everybody's doing the Olivia. And the Sophie thing is big now. Charlotte's big, huh? Isabella's huge. Also, Henry's everywhere.

I have an Isabella. And I have an Ella. All right, now we're just in the, and this is not radio. Charlotte's big, huh? Also, Henry's everywhere. I have an Isabelle and I have an Ella. All right, now we're just in the, and this is not radio. Elijah is number four? Yeah, I know Elijah. He's always missing. I don't know. Ezra?

Yeah, that's a big thing now, too. We just got to move on. There's a big spike. There's a big spike in dumb names up in here. Ezra, honestly, is a very nice name. I'm glad that John's taking over. My buddy Craig's son is named Ezra. He's actually very lovely not problem

Henry's also very big now Henry's big now. Yes, well you've been big for a while That medicine is That medicine is... Butter. Yeah, yeah, yeah, sorry. You did first. That was better. Alright, Henry. Well, I don't like talking about sad shit, but we've been doing it all day today, so you might as well... What's sad about what we've been covering?

You're right. It's all hilarious. Thank you. You know what? Forget it. I'm fine. Let's go home. One of our boys died one of our true Like as like as friends one of our like idols died It was it was one of those that I didn't even I want to acknowledge yet because it had made me very sad, but he also was probably

Next to george clinton. Yeah, one of the most formative Voices in my brain. Yeah, no so important recourse We're talking about sly stone passed away of sly and the family stone people don't probably even know if you don't know who sly Stone is you probably do he made some of the biggest like you know, very sampled saw everyday people You know all that good stuff. I mean, I mean, his albums were unbelievable. If you ever listen to Momma Said Knock You Out, that... It's a family affair.

Family affair is fucking perfect. That album... There's a riot going on, is in my top five albums of all time. It's wonderful. It is the only sad funk album. And it's beautiful. Yeah. People like forget

Especially within funk because I feel like funk of all of the musical genres Yeah, is the most maligned right? I feel like a lot of people don't really understand except for ska because scogging will fuck itself Yeah, what are we gonna do? We're gonna sit here and talk good about ska, but funk is one of those People that get don't understand you can have People that get don't understand you can have Emotion in funk. Yes, and that's what sly stone did that's what sly stone and Parliament did that was different than what anybody else They were making statements without making statements They were like making statements, but you know, they were like, okay We hear something very important for us to say but also like we need to party you have to party Yeah, like it's a that's what I love about funk. It's like we could acknowledge the madness, but remember we have to party. Yeah, like it's a that's what I love about funk. It's like we could acknowledge the madness

But remember we have to party. Yeah, cuz if we're not partying do you understand they win? Well, also we're gonna die Yes, so at some point we're gonna die and you everybody on their deathbed Everybody says I wish I had more fun like every single Not sly sly stone did not say that no, I think he says Well sly was a very difficult man. Yeah. Well, he wasn't really like from what I know of him He didn't have a bad reputation is like like an abuser or anything like that. He was just a difficult He was a perfectionist a lot of drugs. Yes. He did lots and lots and lots of crack, which is unfortunate.

He got really weird. And then when George Clinton got sober, he didn't really. He almost got sober a couple times. He ended up being homeless. He wrote some of the most influential, huge songs ever, and he just had bad contracts. And he didn't understand the concept of, if your song is in a movie, you should get paid off of that. No. I didn't understand the concept of if your song is in a movie you should get paid off of that No, he never he didn't understand that like when you look at everyday people. Yes, it's in commercials and stuff like that But if you just go to Spotify, it has

245 million listens like that's like such a fucking crazy Number demand the fact that this man ended up homeless to shows like what happened and how bad things can be in like You know in the record industry But he made it some of the most beautiful music ever made dance to the music if you want me to stay Thank you for let me be myself which I love which one of my best favorite songs from the summertime I want to take you higher case. Surah, Surah Obviously that's a higher case. Surah surah obviously that's a cover case I love it just like a baby

I caught you smiling hello that again. Oh my god. He's the best Stand you know it everything that that man put together died penniless. It's crazy It is so upsetting so fucking sad it really is but If you don't know his music first of all, I don't know how but just spend a day with those first Six albums or five albums. They're back-to-back fucking amazing, especially Riot going on in stand or mean something. Our perfect albums. Especially right now, this shit fucking means something.

So go and check it out. Sly Stone. They were one of the first groups to like really like half of us are white, half of us are black, half of us are chicks, half of us are dudes. And like they were just like, we want everyone's input. And it was like no one was doing that shit and they did and it was fucking cool And it was awesome and it seemed lame at first and then time fucking told because it was like one of the most sampled artists in hip-hop history, it's everything about sly and what he did for music and just like good times. Yeah, dude, like

Like he means so much to me. I just watched the new documentary that just came out. It like just came out, right? It just came out. It's on Hulu, Questlove's second movie. It's called Sly Lives, unfortunately. Oh, it's a real sad one. George is all over it.

He's interviewed all over it. It's a lot of fun. But yeah, go check it out and make some make some time for Sly Stone this weekend before you go to the the no Kings rally Do you hear that he might have had an affair with Doris day? Oh And that was why he made case sir ah sir ah Fucking perfect version of that song. Oh my god. I love that You know who else he was with for a while who Ruth Copeland that P funk? Backup singer who actually put out those two amazing albums Yeah, with all of like P funk as her backing band you guys understand anything about P funk or like oh they all like they put

Out so many different albums. They put Open for each other so everyone would get paid twice It was just like it was kind of genius But and then sly ended up opening for P funk when P funk was on their fucking stadium tour Yeah, which was they were the first black stadium tour and he was their opener either way An icon has passed and if I didn't bring it up, I would be kicking myself So if you don't know sly and a family stone just take some time, but Eddie I think we'll be alright because we have Benson Boone Let's move on. Uh, I

Don't worry Pat Boone Benson Boone his talentless Let's get on Anybody could flip I could see I saw the cheerleading you ever watch the young ladies cheerleading expeditions Fascinating stuff, but you think again But they could anybody can flip and making flip We got some listener emails They gotta say now I went into a little bit of a research hole on the glimmer man

Oh, you did I did I immediately forgot it existed until right now again. Welcome. So I watched Missing 411, The Hunted, done by David Polites, who did Missing 411. Now, for those of you that don't know, we've talked about Missing 411 for a fucking decade. It is about, basically David Polites was a researcher that realized that the national park systems don't have a missing they don't have a centralized

Missing persons report or a data by that's where people go missing the most but it's it's also Considered to be this sort of like weird legal Like hazy zone between the park rangers and the police and what they're allowed to tree cops tree cops But the thing is the tree cops they are a lot of times operating at a 1975 technological level Yes, you know I mean, so these guys are writing shit down. So that's where it started mysterious You think they're allowed to use paper or do they hear the tree scream? Yeah, they're like Somebody write that down. I'll have to write it my own feces I can't possibly write that down. I'll have to write it my own feces. An estimated 1,000 to 2,500 people go missing in national parks each year.

Right? We don't know. But that's a huge gap. It is. It is. But Missing 411... So there were 1,000 or more than double. That's called statistics. But the Missing 411 was always investigating the more mysterious ones Like they always kind of had a series of parameters of like, you know Experienced hunter goes missing Yeah found in a different place miles away from where they were found a lot of times either stripped from their strip naked or scuba

Diver found in trees that weird, you know, whatever but anyway, he did missing 411 the hunted Which is it's starting to hedge into the area where he's like is Aliens which I love my aliens, but it's also like I actually kind of like a better one It's even more mysterious But since then it had a whole thing on the glimmer man this idea of seeing a predator like Thing and I just wanted to read another email because I actually did receive about 15 glimmer male glimmer man He's gonna mails glimmer mails could you read him or were they? No, the reason why it's like I don't ever sent by Kevin Iver wings

Honestly though the Steven Seagal glimmer man doesn't hold up as well I imagine so that was a part of my research Doesn't hold up as well. I imagine so that was a part of my research It's not good. It's not a good film. He said he is at a he's looking very pudgy in that movie. That's when it started Yeah, it's when he really started Becoming I think it's called an eclair lifestyle. Yeah So this is called the clammer man. Oh the clams. He was eating at the time More class more juice more juice more clam juice all right here we go here's an email I was listening to the latest side stories and perked up immediately when you talked about the glimmer man it immediately reminded me of the 2010 story of Jan McAbee wife to move on state director of Maryland Bruce McAbee, wife to Mufon State Director of Maryland, Bruce McAbee.

Bruce actually maintained a website for his ufological research and included a page in his wife's story. Unfortunately, it looks like the site was taken offline after 2016, but I'm including a link to his write-up on archive.org. What made Jan's story so interesting is she actually took a picture of what she saw, but the picture came out distorted and in a resolution her blackberry was Archive org would make Jen's story so interesting that she actually took a picture of what she saw But the picture came out distorted and in a resolution her blackberry was incapable of being set to Bruce had also had a blackberry So a picture I remember my blackberry and I tried it every time I tried to take a photograph. It was a goddamn It's real stupid. All right, so here's the write-up that old

Jan did all So here's the write-up that old Jan did all Big bags Jan I wasn't gonna say anything, but she's doing all right It was Wednesday September 29th the next to last day in September. Thanks And hustling hunting season for deer and Ohio was just four days old Okay, shouldn't read this whole thing. It's real bad. The day started cool and damp and then became a beautiful warm day with a nice sunset. Jan was anxious to have been hunting. Her breasts were heaving and wet from the Fudu. So much exposition. Her method

of hunting consisted of waiting and watching while seated in a tree stand. Isn't that hunting? The seat of her stand is at the top of a 15 foot ladder. Her seat in the northwestern corner of a many acre wood that is surrounded by a large planted field and low density residential areas. Her seat faces the east and is surrounded in all sides by trees She didn't hunt in the morning But she did climb up the 15 foot to clatter to the seat to test the newly installed bow hanger She took a picture of her bow hanging from the bow hanger She took the picture with her Blackberry pearl model 8 1 3 0

All right The phone records the cords day and time of the picture of the spatial resolution the total 3 0 all right the phone records the cords day time of the picture the spatial resolution The total bite size all right is that the picture Rob? This is a picture here of just the bow right and then there's there's all Sexy Jan's there looking a little bit like Looking getting a little bit like a build Bella chick, but I like I like her attitude right? She's like a cross between Bill and Jordan she went to her tree stand about 530 squirrel a squirrel was dropping nut pieces on her head and animals birds and

crickets were moving and making noise. To occupy her time, she was texting, quote unquote, texting with her phone, a means of silent communication. You don't need to explain what texting is! At about 621 p.m., she decided to photograph herself in the tree stand. She was facing east with the sun at her back. She held the camera above and to her left. The sun was behind her, low in the west with the light filtering and to her left. The sun was behind her low in the west with the light filtering through the tree branches.

It's this picture here in which you get the side look of her jowls. Suddenly the woods went quiet. Noise stopped. The silent was weird. It's a surprise that unnerved her that she wrote a text message to her friend. Something is wrong.

The woods just went to a dead silence. No squirrels. No birds. Do do do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do

ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do ba do As she knows as hunters know that when a predator such as a bear enter an area the other animals tend to become quiet

Then she became aware that a weird visual effect was moving right towards her field of view at an apparent distance of maybe 15 to 20 Feet she said it looked as if she was looking through saran wrap mmm all right She compared the distortion of the scene as being somewhat like the effect of the invisible creature in the Predator movie This distortion was at a higher altitude than her about 15 feet above the ground Perhaps she was about it was about 25 feet off the girl above the ground She took off her glasses and rubbed her right eye thinking at first she had a floater But after rubbing it it was still there. It was not a floater That's when a little dot is in your eye.

Yeah, I get floaters. Yeah, I get floaters, yeah. As she recalls it, she held the camera in her right hand about a foot and a half from her face, pointed the camera in the direction of the distortion and took a picture. As she recalls, the picture was taken immediately. You've been talking about taking a single picture

for about half an hour. The picture should show the nearby trees, but that's not what the picture shows We don't need to read every it's that right there. It's this yep. It's a blur. It's a blur with hair I mean it so later. She took two more pictures of herself one of which is shown below right here. You can see it Nope, that's that's just bushes. Hey there. She is there. She's there's obviously her hair My fucking Jan's obviously her hair Fucking Jan's obviously her own hey

Jan oh Jan what I do to get my claws do you think her tits got in the way of her photography? Yeah, honestly if you like she took a picture through her tits after sitting for an hour and a half more She left the tree stand about 745 and came to dinner with our guests for the evening. They were having beaver 745 and came to dinner with our guests for the evening they were having beaver After dinner clean up she's she's in a tree lay down on a tree stand It's more of a tree sit down Is there an end to the story nope at the end of this She didn't think to mention a strange experience

And then she said that she saw a Facebook message from one of her nephews He said after they she had this weird sighting We were playing tonight on the field and just as it was starting to get dark a huge bright light Appears over the field and begins to move sideways Then in a matter of five seconds or so it disappeared getting smaller almost every second about five minutes later it Reappeared this time it was amber in color I know four people who saw this and according to an upperclassman You got to believe the seniors the same thing happened last year and they actually stopped rehearsal So this lady's saying that maybe it's connected to strange lights that they saw on the other side

How many like alien sightings or strokes? five they saw on the other side. How many like alien sightings or strokes? Five. Five out of 12. Is there one that's made me think of, while we're rambling through this non-coherent story, the is how much I would like to see, you remember the show To Catch a Predator? Oh yeah.

But like without Chris Hansen, it is Predator. I love this. Wouldn't that be great? I think this is the thing. I've talked to you about this idea before, but never into a microphone. Predators. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

To catch a Predator starring Predator. How to meet a Predator. Because a Predator could throw its voice, like, as a little girl. Like, the guy shows up, and it's just like, come fuck me, I just got out of the shop. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then it's just like three lights,

like, go on his forehead, and his brain comes outside. Edit that out, put that in your pocket. You just made yourself a million dollars Well that story didn't convince anybody But this next one will This next story came as a result of us talking about penis implants. Oh, thank God now something I want to talk about something really tangible Paul Paul got a penis implant title of the email I

Was listening to side stories last week of my ears perked up same Literal sentence as the other one yeah when Henry mentioned a particular kind of penile implant the one with the boner button your balls My Paul Paul got a penis implant of this kind I think in its late 60s around the year 2000 He was a married man for many decades at that point my Nana Nan Nana Nana not Nana Your Nana you didn't say it wrong though you didn't see Yeah, Nana Nana sounds like fucking no no no it's like you don't want bananas

I don't want my granny. Yeah, yeah, well. I'm sorry yogurt. I didn't mean to thank you up against fuck you So here's Nana. Would you call your grandma me more? Hey, I was worse. Yeah. Yeah, I hated it. We were babu. I kind of like that Babu's cute Yeah, Babu's cute. It sounds like a cryptid Babu's like what I called Carmelita's vagina Carmelita yeah, you call it a babu. No, I call it a choo-chee. Oh, it's you. She's owner. Chooch No, yeah, does it flip up and down like tootsies moving on? Also in her 60s man that was oh, I thought you're talking about tootsies. No

Still honor No Yeah, it's apparently there was a the pal pal had been a womanizer since the start of their marriage and in no intention of slowing Down in his old age he openly cheated on his Nana as Nana got older and sicker when she was near the end She told my mom that she hopes his pecker rots off Nana Nana died a few months later after what she called her big nasty birthday when she turned 69 Sounds like there's lots of weird fucking in this family Is what he used to say when she would?

I got suicides Also, Nana is what he used to say when she would uh... Hot and sexy. What did you... What did you... Na, na, na. I got some sides. Paw Paw lived to be 89. For the last 10 years of his life, he was in and out of hospitals for recurrent infections including MRSA. I had no idea he had even had a penis implant. But after a few years of infections, my mom finally spilled the beans.

The button in his balls that controlled his erections was continually eroding through the sides of his balls. Oh, Nana had gotten her wish. I think he eventually had to have the implant removed so it stopped trying yet again to escape his barely healed testicle. Oh my God. Jesus fucking Christ. Now that's a listener email.

That's what I like to hear. That's a real old fashioned, that's a listener email Every day hoping for that big old Papa's got a penis implanting email to come in Knowing that the audience is gonna hear about paw paws big crooked Faulty penis implant and then we're all gonna love the fact that we all want one, too I wonder if that's what that birder got Remember our Falconer guy who the for the soccer team and yeah who got the penis implant? Yeah trouble for taking a picture of it. Now. They have a man in an app. Yeah, oh, so you don't even need the button no more No, and it's all bucks. Don't not to use phones honestly though in Italy

I think you do have to like Plated it with a with a tube yeah you have to blow in to suck your own penis to get it off So happy standing in front of his a risk sitting there with his erect penis like it's a horrific flag Always remember bernarby So fun he's bad though. He's not no he's a bad guy We don't like him. No. I love how he was with his penis how satisfied he was with his penis Yeah, here it is right there working just like it's like. I'm a try like I'm a child again a Nino What a great day God bless Italy

What a fun time he does have the button oh he does have the button yeah, he's got the he says right here I did it I did it to perform like when I was young my erection is natural But with this device I press a button that allows me to perfectly control both the erection and the time I can definitely see so cocks gonna run out What do you do then you get wet every single time you hear the oh? Here comes my dickin here comes my dick and all here is you Balls you got my dick caught on a fucking the dog leash No, I don't have a needle for my pump oh

Damn, it's gonna run out of air mid fuck Please Buy it to watch us perform You can see this live every 6 p.m PST on last stream on the left on our patreon and then it goes to YouTube a couple days later Speaking of the YouTube go and subscribe to all of our various new programs and our YouTube channels I know it sounds complicated, but we're trying to simplify it for you someplace underneath LPN romanticie

Who's the bee because we can't do a bitch We can't say bitch on YouTube because God knows the foreign report no dogs in space and most importantly LPN dash TV that's right you hear that other channels you're not as important as TV not as a big one subscribe to the big one it is legitimately free I subscribe to all of them and it's nice because they're actually like transferring everything over and it's premieres live like you're watching it Like you know like you know you towards the end of the year They'll play like the whole season of a television show it's kind of like what's happening on the YouTube channels right now

It's kind of fun. Please actually watch some of the romantic see last night. It's good. Yeah, it's very funny They will crack me up. I have no idea what they're talking about Yeah, you it's interesting that you can watch your wife and your sister talk about fucking. I just can't really, I fast-forward past decades. I try not to engage with Jackie. So few people like sponsor a show of their wife and sister talking about sex, weekly. But they won't talk, they won't do it. They won't talk, Natalie refuses to believe, she refuses to reveal my secrets. What are they?

Side story shows. We got some new ones on the books available today. That's Friday, July 11th in Salt Lake City at the Wise Guys Comedy Club. Thursday, August 7th, Asheville, North Carolina at the Orange Peel. Sunday, September 21st, Kansas City, Missouri, the Truman. October 24th, Kansas City, Missouri, the Truman, October 24th,

Redway, California, Matil Community Center, we're coming back you fuckers! And Sunday, November 30th, Columbus, Ohio, at the Newport Music Hall, starring Travis Irvine. Yes, and we will reveal, did Travis go to Little Edward Island Was he a part of the Epstein reach inside of Columbus and that is what have aborted his run for governor He does go to the Bahamas often. He does so we'll have to ask him live on stage. That's right June 20th the seance tune in it's gonna be amazing and we're gonna announce some tickets for people available on the patreon It's gonna be a really weird event where I don't even know what the fuck's gonna happen

I'm putting myself in Henry's hands and if I get a hitchhiker ghost and it haunts me. I'm gonna kill you can't wait I dare you Everybody hail the Flat Creek Floyd. Sure, it's nice.