Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: Sins of Our Mother

Episode Date: October 5, 2022

Ben 'n' Henry bring you a very special Side Stories this week discussing the new Netflix documentary series "Sins of Our Mother" - the story of Lori Vallow, her apocalyptic fantasies and the trail of bodies she's left in her wake - as well of course as always, Hero of the Week, Listener Stories and, MORE!

There's no place to escape to. This is the last time on the left side stories. That's when the cannibalism started. Side stories. Yes. Kiss all Henry. Kiss all. Yeah, buddy. Yes, indeed. Think you're better than me. I do. Yeah. Oh, really? Yeah, I do. I do. I think I'm taller. I think I'm, I mean, there's more of you. There's more of me. So I feel like it because I'm, I'm smaller. I'm more like quality. Your quantity of person could be, but either way, we live in America. So quantity over quality is our motto only in the house of representatives.

That's what I've learned from civics class. I'm big male. You're a little male. I'm a little male. No, I think that we're both, I think we're both really doing great as well as we possibly can. And I think it's ridiculous to even sit here and have this conversation about who's better, who's more attractive, who's got longer, you know, pubes. We don't need to talk about that stuff because we are equals. Weirdly, I bet you are pubes are pretty close. I think I'm in a trim. I trim. Well, then my pubes are longer because I don't, also we have C3 pubes because we're over in here. Yes. That's the, that is the main issue is that it's sort of like a haze of smoke around a small Scottish penis. Welcome to side stories, everyone. I am Ben hanging out with Henry.

Yeah. Henry and I watched a wonderful Netflix series and we want to discuss it sins of our mother. And no, it's not the sins that we've seen on those adult websites. In this case, it's the story of Lori Vallow and Chad Daybell. And I have to say number one thing, number one, this is on Netflix, number one thing I want to say, thank you to the universe for listening to us. Three-part docu-series, three parts, 50 minutes, 50 minutes, 30 minutes, boom, you get it all in and it's awesome. It's in and out and it's not fictionalized. It's not sensationalized. You don't have a bunch of actors playing the people. I mean, we definitely will because the one thing that sins of our mother reminded me was the absolute massive story

that this is and how many twists and turns it is a true crime fucking cornucopia where you could see it's all the different levels. You got close and shit. And the one thing that was my main takeaway from sins of our mother, a tiny cult indeed, but my God, a powerful one. They got they got a lot of results, didn't they? And I guess they did. Well, to start with modern news is that her son Colby, the one that was featured in the documentary quite often as the one who's like, my mama crazy, she he was then charged with sexual assault, but then it was dropped was by his estranged wife. So he also has a weird ass, like a straight like fucking something other crooked shit going on to and he's the innocent son. Right. He's the night he was the one that was like, my mom,

I don't know what she was doing. I don't know why she's always like this. But then, you know what I noticed? Honestly, as I was watching the documentary, there's something about guys whose heads get thin at the top. His head kind of gets thin at the top. Well, it's because it's got a new haircut. It's a new haircut. It's well, no, it's my care woman, my hair woman. She said that I actually have a good shaped head to be bald. She was nice. She kept it going. She said, you got a good shaped head, but she's saying that I should try to, she said the words, I think you still have hair. It is getting very blonde. Oh, nice. Not bad. See. Well, interesting. That's interesting. But yeah, I do wonder if he's, yeah, because he, he was fine

in the documentary series because he was the one really saying like my mom changed. He was the only person that had like a view of Lori Vallow before all of this. Yes. Of course, Kobe, Ryan, I wasn't aware of these, but of course the charges were dropped. So we'll just move on from there. But he was a key point in the docu series. He humanized the entire situation. The man had a devastating life. His family is gone and his mother who killed his family doesn't seem to give a shit. It reminded me. Number one, Sherry Moon Zombie. This is a role she could play. Oh, oh, yes. She looks, I could see it. Oh, so close. It really is. Lori Vallow is baby in a different scenario in Arizona, getting tan mom. Wow. She is so psychotic. It reminds me of the preview I saw for the movie,

Smile, which I don't know if I need to see because the preview seemed to show me every single smile I'm going to see, but I don't know. Yeah, it really is. I think that it'll be a fun film. But again, the dangerous, the horror part of it, the smiling. What if at the end, somebody frowns? Whoa. Whoa. I wasn't expecting that. The way that Lori was smiling, joyous in the courtroom, on the beach in Kauai, in that's part of Hawaii there, with Chad Daybell. I was like, this is, I've never, it seemed like she was in the middle of a psychotic break. We have some people who have issues and sometimes they think they're Jesus. And I feel like she just really had an extended version of that for like, what, three years? There was something. I mean, I'm

jealous. Just the confidence that you are the Godhead. Must be so noi. Like that's just so much fun. Like you just get to walk around. You declare who's a zombie. Your zombie. Eliminated. Your zombie. Your name's violent now. Your name's Ned. Didn't he call her Ned? He's like, Ned. Yes, Ned or Nick, Schneider. And no one knows why that was the name that was chosen. For those of you that don't know, so Lori Vallow, when she was married to Charles, when she was married to Charles. So that was also what was really good about the documentary, is that it really did it step by step, by step, by step. So you can see like all the weird twists and turns. And I forgot that the reason why she had killed him or had him killed

by her brother, Alex Cox, was because he was no longer Charles. He was either Ned or Nick, which was the demon that was inhabiting him, right? And so what you see, though, was that the delusion, the one thing that since her mother also showed was how deep the delusion was. Because my constant question when it comes to these types are, how much of a true believer actually are they? Right? Like, does Lori Vallow really believe that she's the Godhead? Does Chad Daybell really believe that he can see the future? Right? Did he get that he's the prophet? Right? And up to a point, I think Chad Daybell is not a true believer. I think that Lori is more of a believer than Chad. And I think Chad is doing the classic guy thing where it's like, I'm kind of a

dusty loser. What if I write a book? Maybe I can finally have sex with that hot woman that I've always wanted to because he kissed a woman and then immediately was like, I'll mirror you. And I think he lived a very sexually restrained life. Very much. Who gives a flying fuck? He made his own decisions. Why did I become a comedian? I became a comedian to even the playing field so that I could kiss a hotter woman than I was supposed to. There was a whole point. So Chad Daybell is in the right business. But Lori Vallow, because of the texts, she's like, Ned only has a few days left. Yes. I know that's like now is a count. I guess now it's the time being like, Ned is really getting uncomfortable with this situation. We're going to have to do something

about Ned. And like the fact that she could stay in character in the texts. And then what you were saying, the smug, it was once she got into the fucking courtroom and she's smiling. I mean, no, it's probably jail makeup. So it's probably smashed up crayons and a whole series of different things. Applicated. Truly was what probably whatever a lawyer had. You can have this. He's put this on her lips because she was like, I have to look something what some are presentable or whatever I am. I am God. So I might need your God. And she was like, we've known some crazier people in her life. And she was like, it's hard to describe someone flowing. And I have to say she was flowing in that courtroom.

She was gracefully walking in this, again, perverted psychotic universe that she has created. But number one thing, Ned, name for a demon. Come on. What do we got nerdy demons? Does he have a, does he have a bunch of buck teeth and he's wearing glasses? Come on. I played a demon named Gary for many years. All right. And yes, it was supposed to be funny. It's a funny show. No one died in real life. Yay. No one really died. But also, yeah, true. That's the thing is that the idea of calling someone Ned, like that's their evil name. Right. Is really interesting. She's talking, she's talking to an angel, Moroni. And then the demon is Ned. What is happening? I'm sorry. It's, it reminds me of,

it reminds me of Ground Hall's day. Ned, Ned Ryerson. Ryerson? Yeah. Yeah. Literally, that's who I saw when she kept saying Ned, that that strapping man, Charles Vallow, kept turning into Ned Ryerson. And then she, but it is wild. Like, again, I just didn't realize. So there's another part that, well, just, just really, just going back really quick to the net thing. The second point was, so we were talking about, is she a true believer? And I, perhaps she's in character, but then she also seemed to truly believe she was going to be on the wheel. I thought she was going to, she thought she was going to get about a million dollars. And so how do you weigh those two things when you're like, okay, so you think there's a demon

living inside of him? You got to kill him. But then two days later, you didn't forget this demon did have life insurance. Oh, I guess it's also truly Ned, then he's absolutely evil because he deceived her into thinking that she would ever get the money. And so afterwards you like to see we did it right because he was always a demon. But I do think that, yeah, of course, Charles took her off the life insurance about three months before, because he was like, he's going to kill me. Yeah, he started to, he understood. Well, I think that we're one big discussion. I remember when we were doing Jonestown and talking about Jim Jones. And I think it comes, I think the true believer cult leader aspect comes in waves and degrees that you start in a more cynical environment.

Charlie, Laurie Vallow found Chad Daybell through a podcast, which is again, just unfortunate. Very unfortunate. Again, I love our listeners. I love like, I love being a podcaster and doing it. But it's very difficult. Like the profits not going to have one. I'm just sorry. Okay. The profits not going to have a fucking broadcast. The profit, he's going to be on terrestrial radio. I really do think he's going to have a contract. I think he's going to have a gap. I think, I don't know. I can't see him sitting with like a bunch of podcast producers, like the real profit, like figuring out being like, oh, these good shore mics, like we doing all this and like, oh, what programs are we like? I don't think it's happening. Would you just be able to put the words

in your brain and then you don't even have to have a podcast at all? Whoa. I mean, that's the idea. Wouldn't you just show up with the feet at the profit, right? That you found you've been searching for years and all of a sudden now you're, you're at the Godhead and you can see him and he's a fucking dumpy piece of shit. He's just some guy and he's not even in bro. I would even say he's not even in Brooks Brothers. He's wearing like Walmart gear. Like this is not the profit. If there's a foreign language that you regret not learning in school, it's never too late to start with Babel. The language learning app that sold more than 10 million subscriptions. Thanks to Babel's addictively fun and easy bite-sized language lessons,

you can finally cross learning that new language off your list. With Babel, you only need 10 minutes to complete a lesson so you can start having real-life conversations in as little as three weeks. Plus, Babel's speech recognition technology helps you improve your pronunciation and accent, which I never need any help with. In addition to lessons, you can access podcast games, video stories, and even live classes. Plus, it comes with a 20-day money-back guarantee. I know when I went in to be a hostage negotiator for Mexico, the first thing they had to comment on was my accent. They said I didn't sound like a native speaker. And I said, me, Henry Zabrowski, not a native speaker, but with just a couple of select lessons on Babel. I got to go in there

to help the cartels work their way up to become government officials. And it's incredible. Honestly, I was struggling with my Canadian for years until Babel got in there. So right now, get up to 55% off your subscription when you go to babel.com slash left. That's B-A-B-B-E-L.com slash L-E-F-T for up to 55% off your subscription, Babel. Language for life. But you see it building. I think that she was looking for, again, it's Lori over Chad was like, why am I special? And the reason why she's special is that she was born hot in Idaho. And if you're in Iowa, Idaho, Wyoming, love you. But if you're like, if you're a solid, because Lori Vallow, she's an LA7, right? She's doing good. She's very beautiful, right?

I mean, I guess whatever. And that makes you an Idaho, Iowa, 95, right? But the problem is, is that you see like, we do people talk like, uh, sexist, right? It's misogynistic. But no, she used it. And to her, like, it was a part of her delusion because she's like, Pete, everyone treats me special. Everybody treats me special. I must be special. There's something about me that's super, super special. And every day she's looking for the validation of it. And at some point she sees this other narrative that she can just insert herself into and be like, now I'm suit. I'm obviously special. The prophet wants to bang me. Everybody does. And I didn't fully believe that until the footage and sins of our mother, when they have her at the station,

right? So Charles Vallow has, he's told the cops five, six times. Yes. My fucking wife, my strange wife is going to fucking kill me. But you know what was interesting about that also is because she is saying such psychotic things like my children are zombies. You're on the dark side, Charles. So is JJ. So is, uh, so is, uh, Tiley. Um, then when you repeat it, you sound crazy. You sound crazy. So the judges are, so the officers are like, okay, she said, you're on the dark side. All of these, it's like, when now the onus is on you to prove that you're not, and it screws, it just, it, it makes it very difficult for, it's for Charles and the kids. It's the core of the hook of quote unquote secret schools. It's what, what LRH understood

implicitly is that if I walked you through all of this shit and then you've already signed up, and maybe some of it's helped you or not. And then I reveal the Xenu thing, the secret chapter, that now you've gone so far and you've dealt, we've done with so much that now like are like, oh fuck, now I have to explain to people, if I were to try to explain the inner workings of our, of our fucking religion, it's about how we all worship this alien destroyer, right? Like, he's a part of this storyline. So yeah, what you said, you sound like a fucking crazy person. Right. But finally, he had convinced the police, he had, he did all of the legal red, he ran through all the legal red tape, Charles Vallow, he went and he, like, he got

this petition put together saying they needed to do a mandatory mental health pick up for Lori Vallow, that they needed to go scooper and they needed to talk with her. But then Lori Vallow is in the police station with her daughter and the cop is talking with her and she's like, well, you know, Charles thinks I'm crazy and he says all these crazy things like I said them to him and these cops are like, yeah, sure. And then eventually they're like, well, it says here, we got this like mandatory mental health pick up we're supposed to do for you. But this is the thing. Then the cop proceeds to tell her flirting with her the entire time, how she can get out of the mental health pickup. He's like, well, the thing is, don't ever open your door. You just

make sure you open up a crack and then you close it. Don't let the cops in. Don't let the cop, he's like, if they want to come to you in your car, just, just lower the window a little bit, talk to the cop through the window. And this is another cop. And this is the person that is a legitimate circus crazy person, like for crazy. Like nothing then proved it until later on. What you were saying, the idea of like being when she was in the court and like walking around, like her shit didn't stink. You're like, Oh, she might actually be very insane. Well, and of course, we don't know if her dukey does stink based on diet. It might actually probably does. Many of the vegetarian or the healthier people are not sure if she's a vegetarian,

but she eats healthy. Oftentimes that does lead to a little bit of odor in the bathroom. I do believe hot women take one putrid liquid dump every three months. I agree with that. I just get it all out. And then they go back to their life of just pellets. The saddest thing about that, okay, save it for jury duty. So the saddest thing about that interrogation or conversation, light conversation she had with the police is Tiley is there the entire time. The entire time. And Tiley obviously loves her mom. Tiley loves her mom. And Tiley wanted to impress her mom because she did this thing. Same thing with the other bitch. What's her name? That was like Lori Vallow's best friend that appeared on all the podcasts

afterwards. I know they try to get her to lie for the cops, right? Like they wanted her to pretend like Tiley and JJ were with her. And then she does her whole like, I simply can't believe you'd ask me to lie to the police like in her weird like Idaho way. And then Lori Vallow is immediately just talking about like, no, no, it was like, maybe it's just because starting to sound like someone is doing some zombie talk. That sounds like the thing that a zombie would say. And you're like, well, that's the thing. And also, with all of her friends, I'm forgetting, I want to say it's Meg, but I don't think that's right. This is the friend. She was one of the more normal Melanie give Melanie give her husband was actually involved in the

in the, they're all in, they were all involved at one point with the Dave L type philosophy. They were already in it. A podcast occurred where her husband was on with Lori. And again, the podcast is disgusting. The whole thing of it is. And according to Melanie Gibbs, husband, he saw JJ for the last time and their speculation that when they showed JJ to her husband to prove that he was still alive, he was in fact dead. And that was the last known sighting of JJ, this little baby child who had no, do not deserve any of this. But Melanie, it was just proof that Lori was trying to set up all of her friends, all of them all in the narrative. And as soon as they were like, Hey, at least give me a heads up. Because Chad then

called Melanie was like, cops are going to call you don't answer. It's like, I have to answer. I'm not, what are you talking about? Well, it's just, it's dropping out of nowhere. Well, this is the problem. They all, every one of them in the circle around Chad Daybell and Lori Vallow, they were totally cool with letting this ride out. It's because it's the fantasy. There's, I've seen this happen. This, this does tend to happen in internet groups. Never mind weird fringe Mormon internet groups, right? Where they, because they, you know, in Mormonism, it is completely built in. It's a part of the religion where you're allowed to, you can declare yourself a little mini profit and get your own crew together. That is just, that's a part of a,

of the function of the way that they built their theology where, but combine it with the internet where like there's kind of a fantasy involved where everyone's like playing these like this end world scenario out. Like we're going to go like, we're this rag tag group of people that were the last of 144,000 are going to live. It sounds like a young adult novel, right? We're all going to, we're here kissing. It's cool. Kissing and it's crazy and it's wild. You know, it's different. It's dark. We got, like we got, we have to kiss before the world ends. That kind of shit. Ooh, it's like the beginning of the craft. But then she gets real. Yeah, it does. And then when shit gets real, now the cops are involved. There's no longer, there's no fantasy. There's

no angels. There's no visions. It's like, there's a real physical cop that has arrived. You have killed your children because you have said that they are zombies. It is now all legit. And I do think that Chad Daybalt's kind of like floating in it because he's the one who killed them. Well, of course he is. And I think Lori is the one obviously that was defending him. She's marrying it for him. Absolutely. I think she was more in charge and she's throwing Chad under the fucking bus. She's also doing that. She's distancing herself from him in the trial. Like we're going to see the same shit. Well, I don't know. We'll see because now they're going to go on trial together, which I think is going to be very interesting. She did have some eye

contact with Chad after the, or during the arraignment where she's like, hi. And I must, I must say, as the police officers were excavating the backyard of Chad Daybalt's home, where he also killed his wife. Oh, that call when he's doing the call. Yeah. They're in the backyard. Oh, okay. Honey, is it everything fine? I don't know, Lori. We'll see. Like he's doing that weird thing where he's just a bitch. I hate him. He is such a dumpy bitch. And I felt like, you know, when the babies were dead, when Tylee was gone and JJ were gone, they literally wanted to do a life redo. That's why she went back to Hawaii with Chad and watching that footage, it just made my skin crawl. Yeah. Because it's, it's insane. It is so insane. And anyway, check out

the documentary. There's so much more to it. It's really worth it. It's like, I was very happy with what Netflix did. It's like, again, because it's just a straight down the pipe, true crime documentary. And it's, it's really good. And I think that they got really good interviews and just seeing her haunted eyes. I also, I would, you want to issue my own correction immediately. Lori Valla was born in California. And then she did, she did leave and come back, but it was San Bernardino. So now there you go. San Bernardino. The other person in this documentary, just quickly, I forget her name as well. I'm bad with names, but she was the Burnett gal who was batshit. The gal, the gal who was very religious, who believed that she had multiple

past lives, whichever you can. Oh yeah. The one who was like, there was so in the world, I said we were saying in the world of strange, hysteric religion, there are so many people that are, that are nuts and they have really crazy conversations as if they're normal. So if you look at Lori, she's just like a little, she's just like, whoa, she took it slightly to the right. I can't believe it because she lost focus of Jesus. So almost to the point where I'm thinking Jesus might be needed in this damn religion so that people don't think that they're Jesus. The whole time she's just like, because Natalie and I were laughing at that because she, her thing is like, well, Lori shouldn't be killing her children because zombies don't come

around until the 19th generation. Like, you know, she has this like weird, like other pseudo-religious reasons why Lori Vallow's religion is incorrect. Right. Where she's like, but her absolutely unhinged beliefs are also like that. She's crazy. But it's normal to believe that we each have an angel assigned to us that's our seeing guide angel when we go up to heaven and they make sure we get our favorite foods in the buffet and we do something like you're like, yeah, it's a concierge experience when you go to heaven. Do you think heaven's a buffet? Ask the zodiac. As the zodiac said, there's also a new article. We, I think if we talk about a little bit about this yet, so we can talk about this here, but it's not all, I don't have a lot of information. I'm just

saying it's another article. It's another suspect of the zodiac. They say is a lock. We just, I don't think we're ever going to solve the zodiac. No, no, no, no, no, we're not. It's an unsolved mystery. There's just no way we'll ever know. It's all circumstantial. Every single piece of evidence is circumstantial. Check out sins of my mother. It's a really great, it's quick. You can watch it and your eyes won't bleed and they don't just repeat the same thing over and over and over again. And also the journalist was fantastic. The detectives that actually took this case seriously were fantastic. Finally, when it all came together, it just also, it shows how it's very difficult to prosecute crimes and stuff that are within like families.

And but like, because it's the, no one wants to get involved. The Murdoch case as well in South Carolina, which probably won't want to get involved. That family also could use a little three-part docu series as well. That's coming. Just to put it all together and see it in a linear way because. Yes. Once it goes, but Tylee and JJ, that entire process was 10 months and everyone's like, where's the kids? And I also felt a little bit bad for the grandmother, for the mother of Lori. She's just trying to defend her kid. Well, she's a basket case, fucking two. She was just like, I just couldn't believe she'd go that far. She told me a couple of crazy things, but I just figured that's Laurie and you're like, what are you? No one wants to believe it. And you know, that's

why please God don't take the Bible literally. They talked about Abraham and the story. I believe it's Abraham, Isaac or whatever. It's goddamn poetry. It's just, I, oh God. It's just not real because they haven't released how JJ and Tylee died. And I just wonder if Chad Dabel is standing there with a fucking sickle and just be like, God, if you don't want me to kill these two kids, let me know now. You tell me right now. And then Lori just whispers in his ear. Kill the kids. Kill the kids. Okay. God got you. Let me just see a titty. Let me see a titty. All right. That's why I'm doing it. And I just wonder if, because they haven't again released how the kids died. I wonder if it was something like a traditional or something.

There is, what I have heard is that they were probably drugged and then put out because again, he just didn't have the fucking, I mean, this is disgusting to say you didn't have the balls to do with the hard way. He wanted to make sure that they could just like, he wanted to make sure that he could be kind of dispassionately released from these zombies. And it also just speaks to, it is interesting because I thought they were these needed to be destroyed zombies. I thought that they were the biggest villains in the oral little world. And you still wanted to make sure that you could not get it. It wouldn't be too icky for you. But he did write that text, that horrible text. Oh my God. I guess I had to go bury a raccoon today. Fun times,

you know, some garbage. He sent a Chad Daybell sent a text to his wife after or before the kids were murdered. I believe it was after saying that he got into a fight with a raccoon. So congratulations. We have a pet cemetery in our backyard, which just again, the entire thing is so horrific. And if you think about pet cemetery, obviously a lot of zombies and a lot of animals involved with this. See, that's a good show, too, is that they come back up from the fucking dead. Well, that's why when the zombie kids fighting their parents who killed them. Well, that was another thing. When they exhumed it, Chad Daybell's wife, there were people that were like, oh, jeez, they better wear some, they better have some, they need a mask. They're

going to need a gun because this is going to be a zombie in there. And it's just, it's just insane. It was Janice Caxx. That was the mom. And again, just lastly, lastly, lastly, the scariest part of all of this, blood clots. It's the silent killer. That's what God Alex talks. You never know when they're coming, you know? Well, yeah. It was like, as soon as he died and they're like blood clots, I was like, that's, that's no, it's hidden home for me. Because also, yes. Yeah, chickens have come home to roost. Also shows that, you know, God killed him. If that, if there was a way to say it, right? Truly, if, if you all believe that God is this fucking like ever present universe, and obviously God sent the fucking bullet through the veins of Alex Cox to his fucking brain.

And also his standup. What? Of course he's an open miker. Of course. I didn't know that. I forgot. I actually might have forgot that in all the details. So I could have gone for a little bit more standup from Alex Cox. They only got about a 10 second clip in there. I only think they, I think that they only, he only did it a couple of times. Like he did a couple of bringers, but the fact that Alex Cox was an open miker made so much sense because it's the same because his whole thing too was about like, it was exactly what you think it was. You know what I mean? Where they like, it's all that trench coat open miker comment like weird jokes about like killing people and shit. It was the entertainment for the children who were kidnapped in the house of a

thousand corpses. It was all, this is, this needs to be, I've actually heard the monsters is good. I'm excited to see it, but I want to direct this, the valo story. I mean, in a way, I got, I actually have the monsters review. I watched it. It is better than, it is way better than I expected it to be, but I was really sad with, I felt like there was, how do you put it? It was lit too much like the monsters television show. It was lit too much like a TV show. I feel like that it was atmospheric, but the makeup is incredible. And honestly, very funny. Sherry Moon, Sherry Moon zombies like, it's like, she's not bad in it. Okay, very good. The guy who played, the guy who played Herman Munster was fucking hilarious, legitimately very funny. It's a

worth to watch. Also, there's a little shit about Alex Cox and Laurie Valo canoodling his children. They were very physically close. That was the thing that the mom always said is that she always kind of like also fucked up as the bomb said this real lightly in that, in the docu-series like, you know, her and Alex were always a little inappropriately close. They're always very, they're touching it. And like, she'd always just sit on his lap and like, and playing with his ears and then he'd be there like, you know, like, been like, that's a nice tight dress you got on, sister. The reason why porn is got the stepbrothers thing on hold, because again, legally they're separation. At least there's no DNA involved in there, mostly it's actors.

But you know, if it's really, if you're really sucking, I guess they really want to be Mormon. I guess that's fully really are looking forward to how do you really be a cult group is like, I guess, mommy cult leader and brother cult leader do need to fuck. Yeah, I guess in that way. A roast as dark as the night, perfect for fueling the cryptid research, and mad ravings required for your podcasting. Don't mind the red eyes. He's just trying to warn you of the bridge. The bridge. Finally, from the caffeine addled brains of Spring Hill Jack Coffee and Last Podcast on the left, we bring you Mothman's red eye blend. Yes, delicious Panama beans. Go to lastpodcastmerch.com to order yours today. So anyway, again, check out sends of my mother

really interesting stuff. And just to remind her that it doesn't happen overnight. It's slow. It's a slow burn. It's a slow burn. I would like to say the Lord needed to get help, but I don't know what would have helped her and she people all around her enabled her, including the system. And I feel like the ultimate victim, obviously JJ entirely. And then poor Charles. Like seven bodies attached them, you know, and something like with Charles, they kept, he kept on sending all these emails and no one ever was like, fuck you, Charles, because they were all still in Lori's spell. And it's just a horrible way to die and it sucks. And I just felt so bad for all of them. And anyway, so ask your mother if she's speaking

with Moroni. And if she says yes, make sure it's a wine. Yeah. Then she's just a little wine. Oh, she's having fun. But if it's a angel spirit, please got it. It's not good. You need to tell her, Hey, mom, you're fucking nuts. You need to go and get some like food, get some like lithium or something and grind it up and put it in her food. I don't know if you can do that. I don't legally allow. I don't know. I think that what they do need, it's the, it's more like, I hope that one day when I finally have my full unhinged, like mini breakdown that will allow me to kind of like retire for a while, like, well, that's kind of what I'm hoping for. That's a funny way of putting it. Yeah. Yeah. People let them go away. But I'm, I'm hoping towards the end of the next contract.

That's the idea. Great. Yeah. Yeah. And then I'm like, it's great. Yeah. Exactly. Then I can go right, right? But it's like, I, there's something about sometimes what you need to do is you take a really person who's got completely unhinged and I've said this to Natalie. She is full permission. Your job is to drug me, put me in a straight jacket, get me to an insane asylum. Yes. Will I be incensed before? Will I be granted and raving? Absolutely. But just bundled me up because sometimes what you need to do is be filled with Thorazine, put in a room and then be like, maybe I wasn't talking to an angel. Like me, it might be nice to have some of the break through where you're like, okay, hey, it seems to be a lot of people are saying I'm not God. So maybe,

because now, because if I have enough time alone, I could think, well, if I was God, I could turn all of them into cotton candy. Right. If I wanted to. I could just do a bunch of shit. I could do whatever I wanted. I could have been in the NBA. Yeah. I mean, I could have done anything else with my life if I wanted, if I was God. It is bizarre. In no era could you have been in the NBA. Isn't that sad? I feel like I could have done it in maybe the 70s. You don't think that there was not a group of the original Polish basketball players that were murdered during World War II. And that maybe then they would have need for the bowling balls of Browsky. Like, you need somebody to get in there and really mix it up and scare them because they're just not

expecting you. You never know. And I think it is very possible. But yeah, anyway, just go to passage of Malibu. I think that's just a really expensive place to go after, I don't know, people accuse you of a bunch of crimes and be like, don't worry. He went to passages. I'm going to attitude rehab. I feel like that's really what I would need is more just like, I just need a fix of just like my fucking vibes. You know what I used to do? A vibe check. We live in this era now of multiple eras living upon themselves, almost like into multi dimensions. Hey, dude. Check out the show. Yeah. I would like a reenactment of Hey, dude, where I can go to the summer camp and I can be one of the campers and I want to salute your shorts. And I want to see you. You're

talking about what we're going to do a whole series when we come back from Europe. We're going to series in the trouble team industry and talking about that shit. So you just want to be a troubled, large man that gets to go to a ranch where you work with a whole horse. Yeah. Yeah. What's like, so your your way of getting past your alcoholism is that it's like you do city slickers. Yeah. Where you go into a dude ranch and your whole thing is you learn lessons about life and love while you help a bunch of cattle go across a river. Absolutely. And I find Curly's gold. Oh my god, it's brown. Oh, it's more like chocolate. All right, everyone. Well, I think it's time for Hero of the Week. This week's hero is John Cena. He's a professional wrestler. Yeah. He is. He is

appropriate though. He is appropriate because he just smashed the Guinness World Record for granting 650 wishes for six children. Now, again, what does he do? Does he go in to like, do they put up like a molecule of cancer and then he wrestles it in front of him and beats it? No. I think he goes and hangs out with the kids and gives them encouraging words. Now that I think about it actually, I'm not sure. You know, it is heroic. Yeah, it's cool. The kids are the heroes. The kids are the heroes. But it's nice that he does that. The children are between the ages of two and 18. No one's called us. No, no. No, we didn't have... We did. Honestly, though, it was very, very sweet. People, but it's... But not for the children. But also,

this is... I think I made this joke and I talked about this. That's how you know everything's fucked when you have cancer. When you're sitting there and you just want to be like, so what are our next steps? Yeah. They're like... Richard Nixon, can you come in? Actually, Blue Oyster Colts here, Henry. They want to just like... Don't fear the Reaper. And the nice thing is when you're so far gone like that, we can just... We can get like a fake version of it. A impersonator. Yeah, we'll get like red oyster butt and they'll come in and they'll just sing a couple of different tunes. And he's the best Steely Dan performance ever. Be like, yes, Henry, that's right. That was the Almond Brothers. His toe moved. He must really love

it. You get like, look, oh, see, look, his eyeballs kind of twitched. He can hear you. I don't want to get there. Hopefully by then I have a sympathetic nurse that just wipes me out. Well, that of course will have to depend on how much money you're able to keep. That's the idea. So John Cena says, if you ever need me for this ever, I don't care what I'm doing. I will drop what I'm doing and be involved because I think that's the coolest thing is, again, he says, I just drop everything and I can offer a fantastic experience. I'll be first in line to do my part. So anyway, it's all very sad actually, but he's been doing this for a long time and it's not easy on him. And it's not easy on the kids, obviously they're

dying, but you know, it's got to be, it's anyway, so John Cena's fucking here over the week. Okay. And the 650 kids who died after meeting him, I'm starting to think, is it him? Maybe he's a serial killer. I don't know. That's actually a great fucking movie. He's just going from town to town, doing all of these wonderful things, but then they're choking all the kids to death in the night. He's just the best. He is the best. As soon as he comes in, the children die with a smile on their face. Peacefully. Some said that it was more of a death like grimace, but I think that they're smiling. They loved him. Anyway, well, there you go. There we go. There you fucking go. You happy? It's a person. He did one. He's an animal. It's true though. It's good. John Cena,

he was good. John Cena is very good. And I just hit charge for the crime. No, no. Henry, you have a controversial opinion that you think he's a better actor than The Rock. I think he's a much better actor than The Rock. I don't know. I think The Rock is an incredible movie star. I think The Rock is a movie star. John Cena is actually a very good actor, but the best wrestling actor is Dave Patista. Oh, fantastic. I'm not going to criticize you there on that one. There we go. Here's some listener emails. Telling the story honestly scares me even to this day because I feel like I might manifest whatever what me and my dad saw. On a normal night, me and my dad went to the gym like we do every evening. You know how we

always go to the gym with our fathers. Oh yeah. I used to go to the gym all the time with my dad. Yeah, it was just this guy named Jin. I watched him just drink together and I had a table. No, my dad didn't drink. No, we get into this truck and we lay the towels down so we don't get the sweat on the seat as we drive home, right? So we talk and we jam out. That's very honestly, your father is very difficult. It's very sweet, but honestly also, I just let it, I let that sweat soak. We pull into our neighborhood mobile home park. My dad notices the only three major power poles are out, right? He's pissed. Damn it. The power's out. We drive down the road. Our roads are not paved. They're very rocky. Okay. And I noticed the houses have power. My dad wanders down the

first street and he pulls into our driveway. I tell him, wait, keep driving. I see something. He drives and doesn't turn. And we pull up on what we can only describe as it gives them pure fear to this day, which seems to be in front of their home, a seven to eight foot tall man in Vietnam fatigues and a woman in floral rags clutching a black plastic bag, but no faces. This is outside of their home. I was so scared. I couldn't even turn to take a second look. I just wanted to shit and be home. Yeah. And to this day, me, my dad will not talk about what we saw. Wow. But they know what they saw. Interesting indeed. Here's another one. My mom had a best friend growing up. Lucky that my grandpa ended up being a foster dad too,

because her parents weren't fit to take care of her. Okay. So when my mom was pregnant with me, my grandma and my foster aunt's dad, Earl, lived with him for the first couple of months of his life. Then one day, my mom and foster aunt found him dead in the living room of the house I grew up in not too long before I was born. So when I was little, my grandpa mainly raised my sister and I, and sometimes we would try to scare us by going outside and making scary noises. Oh, so one night, I woke up in the middle of the night and everyone was asleep. The house was dark and I heard from my bedroom a deep voice doing the ghost voice right that you hear in the movies. When I called up for my grandpa because that's what I thought it was. No one replied. It wasn't my grandpa.

And I asked him about it and he denied it being him. And as I got older, we moved to a few places with my mom and every place we moved, I think Earl the ghost followed. So when I was in high school, I started to hear things in the bathroom falling over out of nowhere. And when I was going to the bathroom one time, the toilet paper just started unraveling by itself. Things would always start to fall over and make loud noises throughout time. There are a few years where I didn't experience anything. But lately, my husband and I moved into a new place on more than one occasion. Things start falling over again, as well as a dresser drawer falling out of the dresser by itself. My mom and I have always thought it was Earl. And I still think he follows me and moves things

around and let me know he's still there. All right, messing with the toilet paper classic Earl. You know how it is with Uncle Earl. He's always watching you take his shit. Absolutely. Get out of here, ghost. It's my time, not yours. Whoa, I'm shitney, ghost. Hey, I'm shitney. And that's why every day you got to live knowing, yeah, ghosts watch you shit, but it's cool because they can't tell everybody. Honestly, you got to love shit for them. I'll do anything in front of a ghost. Everything's fucking, they all, you know what it is about it? Is that they love to watch you shit because it's something they can't do anymore. And I bet one of the many things you miss as a ghost, if you are something and it's true,

your corporeal presence, if you're here, your personality is safe here, but there's two things. Definitely eaten and shit, but because common might actually be eventually you might be like that, maybe I can do that as a ghost. Well, as we've learned with a lot of people who have sex with ghosts, I think there might be some ghost ejaculate out there. See? All right, everyone, well, thank you so much for listening. We're excited to be inside of Europe. No, we're going to be in Europe. We're going to be all over that fucking continent. I mean, to the more on the west side. It's huge. Yeah, it's very kind of be in the areas that we have our shows booked in. Yeah, you'll see us there. If you see us, yeah, we're right, but we'll be on

the road. Very excited to show you all some UK secrets that we'll learn. Oh, we're gonna learn a lot about Europe. Okay. All right, everyone, hail yourselves. Hail Satan. Magustalations, everyone. Talk to you soon. Don't let anyone you know speak with spirits too much so they think they're Jesus. Or if they do, just remember to just give them a lot of room. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors, you can support our shows by supporting them. For more shows like the one you just listened to, go to lastpodcastnetwork.com.