Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: Stargate

Episode Date: October 18, 2018

'Ello gov'na. 'Nother episode of Side Stories innit. We've got STARGATES, SKY MURDER, AND MUCH MORE. Chim-chim-cheree! Bruv. You gotta live, laugh, love.

Hey there, Ben Kissel here for Last Podcast Network. I want to tell you about my show Abe Lincoln's top ad. For more than nine years, Marcus and I have strived to present you with the most accurate and honest political podcast out there. In these turbulent times, it's our intention to unite the country with impassioned debate that reaches out to the rational Americans who find their voices more muffled every day. Every week I use my political science background, my experience running for office, along with my lifelong passion to stand up for the downtrodden, the wrongfully accused, and the invisible

man and woman to bring you news like you haven't heard before. Let's face it, traditional news has failed us. We promise to always tell you the truth the best we see it and I personally guarantee to not be swayed by hyper-partisanship but be guided by facts. To listen, search Abe Lincoln's top ad on any podcast platform or go to lastpodcastnetwork.com and find it under shows. Kill yourselves, everyone. There's no place to escape to.

This is the last talk. On the left. Right above your glade. That's when the cannibalism started. What was that? Oh, yeah! Kissel, I think you'd look incredible with a cowboy hat. I don't want to start wearing a cowboy hat.

Okay, first of all, we were talking before the show about how people make music their identity and they change who they are, maybe they're getting face tattoos now. I like old country music, outlaw country, Willie Whalen, the boys. You name it. The boys. But I'm never going to wear a cowboy hat. I am already six foot seven in a cowboy hat. If I wore the boots, I would be well over seven feet tall, couldn't get on a plane,

couldn't walk in a door. It would just be embarrassing. Make them, first of all, show the world how the holes to these things need to be bigger. That's a part of how your life would be and then you just have the power of what's great about the cowboy hat is the mayhem. Yes, I do like that. I would love to tip it. I like the idea of maybe some rain falling down upon it.

I like the idea of having to get one of those little plastic things that you have to put over your cowboy hat so it doesn't get wet in the storm. I'm just saying when I wore my cowboy hat for the limited period of time that I was doing it, I felt a lot of power and I want to go back to it because I had that big taco shell hat that I got in Dallas, which I'm going to do again. I'm going to get another one. I want to start adding it to my dress, like my dresswear because I think it's fun. What mood do you have to be in to wake up in the morning and be like, today's a cowboy

hat day? Horny is all get out. All right. Well, you got to wear pants. Okay, everyone. This is Inside Stories. I am Ben Kissel. There's Henry Zabrowski.

Cowboy Henry Zabrowski some days of the week, evidently. I don't really want to be taller. I don't care about being taller, but I like the idea of having a really big hat. Just because it'd be fun because then people think you're important. I don't know if that's true, but okay, perhaps I'll go through a cowboy hat phase. I'm not going to get a little bad. I'm not going to wear a vest. I don't know.

No, no, no, no, no. Exactly as you are right now, big hat. Big hat. All right. Well, feel free to let me know what you think, audience. Should I have a hat? Maybe Photoshop me with a hat? Give me an idea of what I'd look like and perhaps I'll be suede and purchase a hat.

They're very expensive. You get a good cowboy hat. You're looking at 400, 500 bucks. That's what I'm saying and people know it's quality. That's true. And I will say this about the American cowboy. Very understated. They love flair.

American cowboys, Texan men, they dress up more than any, first of all, anyone in the Midwest. The Midwest is sweat pant country and I like that about them. Stay cozy. Stay warm. Yeah, the amount of effort the cowboys put into what they look like and what they wear every day, it takes them 45 minutes to get dressed. It is a very important part of their culture.

It is. I think that it's nice that they do it. I like that they look presentable. I like a uniform. I like the idea of choosing old things. I'm trying to get better. Like, you know, what's really seems strange specifically over the last like two years. I like the dad shirts.

What is it? I like the little button down shirts with little things on them, right? But it seems hip, sir, culture has caught up to me and now every company that goes and they will, they make shirts with little things on them and are great. And now I just get 20 of them. And then that's me dressing up because the best part about as a man is that you can fool people into thinking you're dressing up, right? Just wearing a shirt with buttons on it.

Technically, it takes less effort to put that shirt on than it does for me to put a T shirt on. Woody Harrelson and Kiefer Sutherland. They wore some cowboy hats in the movie The Cowboy Way and I watched it as a child and I thought they're pretty cool. But then again, they're not six foot seven. So I don't know. They look a little bit what he looks good in anything, even with nothing on Woody Harrelson

looks great. And Kiefer, I mean, I would love to, I would love to drink with him. He's one of my favorite celebrities to get hammered with. It just seems like it would be fun. But he can look good in anything too. Honestly, you'd look really good. Wait till you're back on the campaign trail because it shows that you're down at home. It shows that you're with the people and that you, you are taller than everyone so

that you can look past the horizon. Right. That's a very good point. Pull channel my inner Rick Perry, take a limo to a pickup truck, change out of my suit, put on normal people clothes, go door to door and then reverse the process until I go back to my mansion. Push the line. Perfect.

Of course. Yes. And by the way, Henry mentions how everything doors need to be bigger. Some of these airplanes we've been flying on, buddy, I weigh more than them and I'm longer than them. I feel like I'm getting into a geometro that can fly. It's been a little scary. No, planes are really small and I know it's, it's attributing to your fear of flying.

Oh yes. I'm doing it. Not to be, not to have a moment of vulnerability like we haven't had the last couple of weeks, but you truly are afraid of flying. And a part of it, I do, we'll say it's part of you being uncomfortable. Where for me, like I'm, I do get smaller, but it's still very uncomfortable for me. Oh, it's uncomfortable for everyone. I'm always touching somebody's knees.

Oh my goodness. I mean, it's impossible to see it. That's why anyway, anyway, you got, honestly, what you got to do is just spend as much time in the bathroom as you can. That's what I say. But then of course everyone else. Honestly, it's so nice. You can go in there and they can't kick you out.

They can though. They, they can. How, what's the hour? I'm going to look this up. How long? Oh, you got. No, it's just a mutiny that happens. Yes.

It's a mutiny. There's only two bathrooms on there. And if you're coach, there's one. If you're in the first class, there's not enough bathrooms to, to facilitate. Dude, you have all the power when you're in the bathroom, because it's like when you, when you occupy Australia during risk and you are the, you're the, you have that corner to defend coming at me when I'm in a corner. Oh, well, let's not come at me while I'm in a corner.

Risk the board game, ladies and gentlemen. Very exciting game. All right. Well, here we go. Here we go. Here we go. Let me see. It says everything that you never wanted to know about airplane toilets.

I don't. We're going to have some, we're going to have stories today too. Absolutely. Okay. Well, one thing I never want to know about an airplane toilet. You should not be flushing them while you are sitting on them. Well, that's. First of all, what kind of fucking maniac?

What maniac? Well, yeah. This thing's been like, yeah, I don't see how much suction my asshole can take. Like immediately like, yeah. Right. It is you would have done. Well, why would you flush it? You will pull your fucking asshole out.

Yes. If anyone would flush it while you're using it, I mean, okay. All right. Well, that's good to know. Just in case. It's also where they keep the black box weirdly inside the toilet. No. I can't imagine.

From an audio perspective, that is very strange. Your shit comes out of the bowl at a velocity faster than a formula one race. Because of the suction. Oh my goodness. Well, put a little hat on it so it doesn't get hurt then. Mine. So it doesn't shoot it out. I used to think it used to shoot the shit out in frozen chunks, but it doesn't.

They don't do that anymore. Yeah. The movie. It's not friggin. What was the name of the David Spade film? Joe Dirt. Yes. It's not the movie Joe Dirt where they have a huge piece of frozen dung that he thinks

is a meteorite. Don't flush while seated. What kind of fucking evil can evil are you? You live in this life. You really want it. You want to chance that shit? Do I really hate? This is, you want to talk about a Cathy, Cathy corner over here?

When you're in a public toilet and the sensors really sensitive. Oh, yes. And it flushes as soon as your ass lifts the seat and then you got that like five stray droplets of water to just go blink, blink, blink. Right. Like your asshole is Jupiter and the gravity is just like sucking them, sucking them in. I hate that. No.

That's the worst because you can feel how wet it is. You can feel it soaking to your membrane. Oh, yeah. I hate an oversensitive self-flushing toilet. I've said, I say that every day while wearing a cowboy hat. Okay. First story of the day. This is a story that I absolutely love and let me just say speaking of politics, this

gal has my vote. She's a cheerleader. She's 17 years old. She's running for homecoming queen. She allegedly gave out pot brownies trying to win school officials in Michigan say a cheerleader allegedly doled out pot brownies to students at her high school in an effort to secure the necessary votes for homecoming queen from her classmates. I'm going to say this legalize it.

This is how you win. This is how you win. I will say it makes a lot of sense. My promise that with making your own weed brownies is that they get very inconsistent. Right. They're very consistent. Some are stronger than others. It's not the best way to consume weed.

I will say for her like what did people know they were weed brownies? Well, this is okay. The marijuana lace treats were handed out to several students. This is at Hartford High School. This happened in late September. Authorities were first made aware of the situation after state police received an anonymous tip. So somebody narked about the brownies. The information was shared with the Hartford police.

According to the local TV station, WWMT, a cheerleader is suspected of baking a dozen brownies and then giving them out to students and including them in gift bags to some of the football players. The cheerleader, they said, were investigating two things. Number one, some were putting goody bags for players. Also, they were used to obtain votes for the queen contest. So the local police is going to really, they're on this caper of who? They have nothing else to do.

I guess not. They are really on the caper here. They're on the case of this woman, the 17-year-old giving pot brownies to football students or to football players and students to try to get some votes. She was already doing it. I will say this though. She didn't need it. Honestly, she didn't need it fucking.

This is nothing to do with the election. She was already doing it. I've not seen the movie, the Grease Witherspoon Classic Election. Did you, wait a second. Did you just call her Grease Witherspoon? No, I said Reese. Because that's incredible. I said Reese Witherspoon.

That is an incredible burlesque name. Wow. I did not say, did you say Grease Witherspoon because I am, that is incredible. What a horrible name for her if she ever gains quite a bit of weight. Oh my goodness. No, Reese Witherspoon, the, is it a classic film election? It's Matthew Broderick is in it as well. I remember high school, high school politics are very intense, very scary stuff.

So you got to do something to get over the edge here, although I would, I would caution people. These edibles, and Henry, you can talk about this. These edibles, I don't want to be, I don't want to get on my Bill O'Reilly no spin zone. I don't want to sound like a conservative grand pop, but they're a little too strong sometimes. You know what? Is that you kind of got to get used to them.

Once you get them in your system enough, you kind of know what the waves are. You know what you're riding. That's the one thing about edibles though is that for me, it's more of an advanced user's technique of eating because the drug changes when you eat it, right? Right. Because it's more of an hallucinogen. So you become, it's a, it's got a different effect. It's not quite the same.

So know your dealer. I would also say when you're fucking, when it should be for 18 plus, I'm going to, that is my responsibility area, because it should be 18 plus, but I also understand you're going to get it anyway. So you better get it legit. It's better if it's legal, you can actually see how much mill, how many milligrams are an inch dose. Start small.

Dude, it is. Always do this. This is, if you are 15 right now, and I'm sure you that you are, if you are handed a weed brownie, eat a corner of it, wait for an hour, wait, you have to be patient, wait for the hour, wait to see what happens. This is, this is the only way I can help you. All right. Well, Kathy corner has ended.

Cool uncle corner has begun. Yeah. Very nice. Very cool. Yes. You eat a little bit and you work your way up. You can always eat more. You cannot eat less.

I will say this, Colorado, I know it's a wonderful state. We love Colorado. I had a situation where I bought this orange soda and it was full of weed, which the weed soda I think is a bit much because you really can't measure it out. No, you can't. It was a hundred milligrams, the entire, not the entire thing. It was a hundred milligrams per ounce. And there was like 12, it was like 1200 milligrams and you know for a fact, so I had once that

thankfully I read it, but then you got a big mouth and I got a big mouth and then you just know for a fact some kids are just slamming that and that they are having a fear and loathing in Las Vegas night. But unlike the movie, you can't push pause, you can't stop it. It actually happens. And when you're actually deep inside of a trip that you didn't know you were going to go on, it can be a waking nightmare. What also happened to me in Colorado, the weed beef jerky, which the beef jerky itself

was some of the best beef jerky I ever had, because weed is a very good, it's got culinary herb-esque qualities that make it good pairings with a certain, especially savory foods. So I'm eating this weed jerky and everyone's looking at me like, no, dude, don't finish it. And I was like, why? I could do anything, I believe in myself. I didn't know there was weed in it. I thought it was just beef jerky.

So you house it on stage. Yes. And then we had to do the second show. And you were like, uh-oh. I can see the look on your face. I was horrified. And then cut three hours later, I'm in the shower, like the world's baddest Terminator, in a fetal position, just still sweating somehow.

Oh my goodness. Be careful. I ate a metric handful of edibles and fell asleep in the San Diego airport. And right before my flight, I woke up and next to me was a giant bottle of water, some Cheez-Its, and then on my phone, where several browsers opened, all of which said, how too high, too high, get down from high, come down high, flight while high? What about too high? Dude, this is the kind of weed culture I like, because Denver started that shit and LA kind

of completes it too, with the very helpful community, which is nice. You always need to have somebody who ends up being a trip sitter for you. I think he did it himself. He just forgot. Oh no, that was me. That's incredible. That was me looking up. How high, how not to get too high.

Oh my gosh. Yeah, you did good, man. Be careful. Your brain saved yourself. And honestly, if you have a friend like Ed Larson from the round table of Gentleman or Wizard or Brighter Side, never trust him, because there are some people that are just barrels that can just absolutely consume anything. Oh, you could take this mount.

You could do this mount. I just did mushrooms with him again. And so it's the same thing. He's like, oh, these are strong. He always says the same thing. And it's like, what's because you're 300 pounds of beef. So when you put it in your system, it doesn't have the same reaction with me. I'm technically petite out of nowhere.

I'm a petite little thing. I can't have the same level. But just remember this. I will say one last piece of advice before I hit my story of du jour, which is when you put drugs in your system to remember you did it, right? You put drugs in there, it's going to stop eventually. That's a part of it too. You just got to chill out.

You know that you are not permanently insane. It will work its way out of your system. You just sometimes need to chill. And you know, it's another really good way to do it. And maybe this is honestly, this is not recommended, but a really good way to get yourself out of a bad trip is to drink yourself into unconsciousness. Well, then you just go to sleep and then you time travel to when the trip is over. But that's for 21 plus.

Right. That's 21 plus. Very good. All right. So here are the story of the 17 year old police have said it appears that the edibles were either ingested or that some were flushed down the toilet. Superintendent Hubbard said in a letter to parents, please take some time tonight to discuss with your children that if at any time they become aware of a potential danger

to themselves or others, it is in, it is their duty to report it immediately to a staff member directly. Our website's anonymous tip line or okay to say. So basically again, they're just having students ran out of their students nonetheless. I don't know. Whatever. I'm a fucking nerd. Yeah.

You know what those parents are doing? They're looking for the brownies for themselves. Yeah. Most of what I would be doing. But I'd be like, you know what, Becky Zabrowski, this is not, this is not for children. You shouldn't have this. And then I'll just sit in the room and I'm like, yes, exactly. My, my, my daddy's time for watching Halloween five.

Yeah. Yeah. Halloween five and most parents or a lot of parents now would be like last man standing and Tim Allen show is back. We better get our, we better get our edibles again so we can laugh so hard at tool time. It's not tool time anymore. It's last man standing. I tell you what, I, I, you know, Wendy was alone in the hotel room the other day and

I'd leave TV on. I came back in, found her watching last man standing on CMT and then she was on the internet owning the libs. Oh my gosh. Can't believe that. Can't believe that. Be careful what you let your kids absorb. Absolutely.

That's right. This next story. Yeah. Okay. So this is a fun, after this conversation, this is a fun little thing to do for yourself. It's Halloween season. Yes. It's time you get a little wacky.

We're getting closer and closer to the day. There are a lot of people out there and this was technically broken on vice, but it was another story. It's, I, I love this conspiracy theory. There are people that think the United States of America invaded Iraq over Stargate, right? But in 2003, instead of just going to just, to invade Iraq under the auspices of Iraq had something to do with 9 11, we went to WMDs because of the weapons of mass destruction, all that shit.

But instead what we went was to go find it is essentially a Stargate that was left in Mesopotamia by the Anunnaki, which is, and then if you don't know exactly what a Stargate is, they're using the pop culture reference from the film Stargate. But really what it is, is a time space, right? It's literally an area that will take you some other place instantaneously through some form of wormhole that apparently that they had found at some point within the ancient city of Ur, they, they were, so at some point they were, Saddam Hussein was revamping the temple of Ur.

Right. And so they have the, the ziggurat, which is a massive temple with a gigantic labyrinth and inside where they believe that the center of it was a Stargate and they believe that Saddam Hussein had found the Stargate and that he was getting technology or something from it. He was figuring out how to use it. So we went there to stop him, but apparently we've had, we've had tabs on the Stargate since the 1920s.

Interesting. Maybe even before that, that the British went in there, the UK apparently also has connections. They were part of the reason why they also wanted to join in, even after knowing for a fact that the WMDs were fake, that they, they went and all that, they were also involving themselves in the search for it because they wanted to get ahold of the Stargate with us and the rest of NAFTA. You know what? For all the BS reasons we went into Iraq, they started with, yes, 9-11, if obviously

Iraq had nothing to do with it as a matter of fact, they did not particularly care for al-Qaeda as Saddam Hussein was on the front lines of defeating them in his own state or in his own country, WMDs, Hans Blick has like found nothing, it was like Al Capone's safe when Geraldo Rivera tried to open it, might as well have just been for a Stargate. I like this story. I kind of want this story to be true because it doesn't make the Iraq war one of the biggest foreign policy blunders in American history and extremely useless when it comes to actual, when it comes to actually getting anything out of the, the amount of money and the amount

of lives we lost there. So I like this. I mean, what was the beginning point of our forever war that constantly feeds our military industrial economy? That's what kind of, like, like we almost kind of did it on purpose so that we could be in the spot where we're at. But if you read a, there was a, on exopolitics.org, a research study was written by Dr. Michael E. Salla called an exopolitical perspective on the preemptive war against Iraq and it

does a full breakdown on the connection of the war in Iraq to Zachariah Sitchin and his research into the nature of the Anunnaki and their relationship with the ancient Mesopotamians and how they were in charge of this Stargate and that now it is seems to following, it was hidden and now it has fallen into the wrong hands and now the U.S. haves it. And I don't know what the hell it is we're doing with it. I don't know. Maybe I would love to see Donald Trump watching his programs on it. I'm not even sure what exactly a Stargate would get according to ancient aliens, researchers.

It's a device that can allow you to use transport instantaneously to another gate, no matter the distance. But you know, if you're going to lie to us anyway, take us into a war, make it fun. The access of evil speech talking about, you know, North Korea, Iraq, first of all, it's not an access. But yeah, if you're going to take us into a war based on lies anyway, make the lies fun. You know, make the lies fun. Make the lies fun.

Sell me. Sell me. It would be incredible if Bush would have just gone in deep on the Stargate. I'm like, okay, whatever. Well, apparently, according to like one of the aims of the Hussein regime was to control the Stargate would sort of the goal was to say hello to the Anunnaki and bring him back. So that's what he wanted to fulfill the prophecy. I see that the Anunnaki would return.

So yes. So I guess the Iraq Stargate theory, it pushes and narrows this idea a little bit further of what Henry was just talking about, saying one of the technologies that were gifted upon the Sumerians were Stargates and their positioning was one of the major reasons for the years of strife in the Middle East. That was not because of Western countries going in there and mucking up the works. It was because of the Stargate. So this story really interesting, very interesting to say the least.

I think it's a fun rabbit hole. This study is wonderful. I do like there is there is one section of it where he's like the primary evidentiary support for the above discussion is admittedly thin for conventional public policy experts and may sound better suited to a fictional thriller than serious public debate. From a conventional perspective, a scattered assortment of independent archaeological authors, radical, exegetical interpretations of biblical texts, the writing of channels of each knowledge, speculative papers from astronomers hardly constitute a persuasive source of information

for understanding the motivations of U.S. foreign policy. But they say there is some important circumstantial evidence. I love it. So and apparently the Stargate, where is it? It's in a city called Nezariah. It's about 370 kilometers southeast of Baghdad in the ancient city of year within that city is the great Ziggurat, a massive temple which had a, you guessed it, Stargate. That is really the one thing about, well, there's many things, but one of the reasons

I would like to go to the Middle East is the history. It's where we all, it's not where we all began, but they have many, many years of history well before our little time here as a baby, as a relatively new nation. I would love to go check it out. This is very interesting. We're saying here that one of the pieces of circumstantial evidence is the destruction of Columbia during its final descent in February 1, 2003, which apparently held information because we had been scanning Iraq from space and we had found the Stargate from space.

This is very interesting. Well, also now there is, one of the disputes is over the location and the number of Stargates, but one thing that all the theorists do agree on, all the theorists do agree on is that the Iraq war wasn't the first time that a foreign power showed interest in it. In what sounds like a super sweet, this is according to the article. So I hate when the articles try to be funny. I will skip that over. They say the British were also fighting to control the Stargate in World War II.

So it seems like it's been going on for a little while. Yeah. It has been going on for a very long time. What they're saying here is, I mean, this is thousands of years old that they've held the secret because the idea is that because if you can remember the Anunnaki were a part of the original God race that seeded us on this planet and they came, they developed us from weird little ape creatures into a combination of their DNA, which made the modern human man and we were used to mine for gold for their starships so they can make it back

to Nubiru before it left our solar system on our gigantic, because you know, we're part of a binary star system. All right. So according to Salyan, he got what he's talking about. All right. Very good. Salyan also says the Bush administration recognized that Hussein had some very, very valuable, relevant information concerning the ancient history of the planet, either technology

or text basically confirming this and he was going to release this to the general public. I think this was a big part of the reason, this is again, according to the researcher, I think that was a big part of the reason why the Bush administration went into Iraq to stop Hussein from revealing this information and also get control themselves. My goodness gracious. According to them, they believe that the Bush administration was highly against disclosure, which I actually don't think they would have been. I think that Dick Cheney would have used anything, anything to distract from all the

shit that he was doing. And I think that if there was, if they had evidence of aliens, they would have driven it in front of people. I'm now starting to be in that line where it's like there are certain parts of disclosure that I don't completely understand in terms of why don't we know? Why does the US government have such a heart on them? I'm not talking about the UFO research that they've done. And I wonder why it's somebody like, I mean, George W had fucking 9-11 to deal with.

So all that went out the window. They're not even going to be talking about aliens anymore. And Trump believes in nothing. So nothing matters anymore. I might believe in aliens. Who knows? Yeah. Who gives a shit what he believes in?

But a part of it's like the... It's very strange. It's just like, just come out and tell us the work you've been doing on UFOs. God damn it. Well, we did have that release. Of course, we know Harry Reid, the Democrat, he did admit to having a $20 million program. So there is a little bit more transparency than there used to be. I think as evidence continues to mount, perhaps we'll address it at some point and will it

unite us as a world or divide us as a world? That is the big question. So anyway, that's a fun little conversation about the Iraq War. A huge blunder. And by the way, as we always mention, George W Bush is not cute. And that was a horrible time in American history. He is a war criminal. But see, one day, man, one day we'll be able to get down to just like psychic problems.

Like real things that are a part of the reason why we can't evolve. Because we can't psychically upgrade. And a part of it is understanding that we are all one giant being, including whatever it is. And that the universe is both a making of our imagination and also contains our imagination. We can wrap our heads around that. I mean, then maybe, maybe we can fix the roads. Now the roads are something that should that nothing psychic about that that needs that

comes from funding and Domino's Pizza. All right, let's move on. South Carolina. Let's go to South Carolina. Beautiful state. I love South Carolina. I love North Carolina. Love grits.

Love grits. I love the ocean. Love grits. A South Carolina woman. Now she has been charged with fatally poisoning her husband using chemicals found in eye drops. A South Carolina woman. She's been arrested. She allegedly poisoned her husband over a period of three days in July.

Detectives in York County arrested and charged Lena Sue Clayton with murder and unlawful malicious tampering of food, although I don't think that eye drops her food because they make you very sick, even if they're not poisoned, of her husband, Stephen Deval Clayton, between the dates July 29, July 19 and July 21st, July 21st, of course, being my birthday. In the press release, the sheriff's office also shared that Stephen 64 died on July 21st at their home and that the investigation autopsy, toxicology tests discovered poisonous levels of a drug that I cannot even come close to pronouncing in the body of the victim. And they found it in frequently used eye drops.

What I'm saying here is you can no longer get away with killing your spouse. You cannot not in this academy, but you can't do it at all. We see it on forensic files all the time and it's just stop killing your loved ones. You can't do it. You cannot. Maybe don't do it in the fifties. I think you could do it. Sixties.

You know what? You can do it. No, obviously can do it, but you need to really think about it. Well, how would you even possibly do it? You got all the tracking out there. You got so much DNA. I am not going to I'm not going to sit and reveal my plans of murdering my new wife on this show.

I can't do this now, but that I'm not doing this, all right, because I don't want to murder my wife. I wanted to want her to live. Well that seems a little scary. It seems like you really have a plan there if you can't even share like in jest because this is a comedic program. There's a lot of. Oh, I forget.

Yes. I, you know, I actually wonder if I were to really, if I was going to kill someone, they say you want to like, you got to get rid of the body. First of all, sure. Because without a body, there's no crime. That's what happens. I mean, there's a crime, but with that, that is really what hinges. You're talking really about avoiding being found guilty in a court, right?

So what you need to do in my mind is as suspicious as it is to be honest, you got to blow up the house. It's like, like even with an apartment complex, I mean, this is brutal, but technically you need to take out the entire building, but when they'd still find the body, unless you can get the heat so big, so partially as if you go, you make a friend with somebody who works at the airport, you get some airplane fuel, which it does take a lot of heat to go to. It takes a lot of heat to ignite.

Right. And so what I would do is something along the lines of you cover the whole house and airplane fuel and then you spark the oven. But wouldn't the neighbors realize that their neighbor is now dousing the entire apartment complex and laughing as it smells like oil until it's too late? No, I'll be like, ah, you know, having a bit of a barbecue. Well, unlike, he's always funny. Well, unlike you, Henry, although I'm not sure how your neighbors would describe you,

Ken Sanford, who knew the couple very well, he told the Herald that he was in shock and that Lena seemed quote, seemed like a sweet old lady. And I'll tell you one thing. That's why you can't. Who can you trust? Who can you trust these days? Old people. And I love old people.

I love all the people. But they're kleptomaniacs, which is not bad. They've lived a long time on this earth and they should be able to take whatever they want. And they love to F. Oh, yes. Oh, people love to make it. Make it, man.

Absolutely. So Lena, she's 52 years old. She's currently being held in the York County Detention Center. It's unclear whether she has secured legal representation, but this is going to be an interesting case there. I remember from West Memphis three going to say this again, get a lawyer, get a lawyer, no matter what it is that you've done, Ron, lawyer, even if you're innocent, speak to no one unless the lawyer is standing right next to you.

Yeah, especially if you're innocent. I mean, again, get Ron Kuby, get Kuby on it. Get that Kuby. Get Kuby. I, you know, why do we want to kill our loved one so much? Like, why is that? Why do we have to be like, why do I guess I do understand the sort of passion. Things that come from knowing somebody from a long time and, and the things that first

were cute and then are now a knowing that eventually turn into a black river of hatred. Well, down deep in your soul. Sure, sure. I don't want to, I'm not going to bring the Zabrowski family into this, but I will say if you do want to play the long game, you just very buttery foods, very, very fatty foods, not a lot of exercise, be like, just sit, sit. Oh, do you want more cigarettes? Maybe you want some whiskey.

Oh, we got some gin just random picked up that at Whole Foods. You know, you can do it. That's just the long game of, you know, it'll take 20 years. No, even my, my mom openly talks about poisoning my father every time she can. She constantly brings up how she can't wait for him to pass and eventually she will go to France with somebody she'll meet at the Quilt Store. Like she has a lot of escape plans. Right.

A lot of fun fantasies. You know what? Here's a, here's a hot take. Just fucking get a divorce. Get a divorce. I know that it seems daunting to break up with somebody. I know it seems daunting, especially, and this is also like, I mean, we've all been trapped in even semi-abusive, like the idea of being in a semi-abusive thing, something

like, you just get your shit, you do whatever you take, you wait for them to go to sleep. Eventually they got to go to sleep or you get your shit, you get to go back ready to go at any time and you leave, you just leave and then you'll deal with the fucking shit afterwards. Hop on out of there. Before you kill them. You know, pulling the band-aid off. That's what you got to do.

But of course we are not here, if you are in any kind of relationship like that, of course. Yes. Get help and get on out. Which is, of course, much easier said than done. Absolutely. I mean, I have no idea what I'm talking about. I'm not a therapist.

I just know for a fact that I have a go-back, but it's for me and my family and it's for when the shit goes down. Yes, of course. And eventually I will take all of whatever cash I have and I will melt it down into a series of gold objects and that's where all of my money will be in the precious stones that I have. And then when I'm traveling amongst the Inka, at some point down in South America, I'll be able to trade for goods.

But you do understand that it's mostly paper money that we deal with in this country and that just turns to ash. You do know that. So it won't turn to gold. No, I'm saying I want to get, I want to have like, I'm going to probably, are you going to go and turn your cash to gold or are you going to start, I'm going to take, that's exactly what I'm going to do. I'm going to buy a big gold pentagram that I hang on the wall that is technically all

of my money with rubies in it. But then what about college? What about the college fund or just like random, Wendy will have to go to get a job. Wow. If she wants to go to college. She's going to have to pay her own way. All right. And also if we technically, if you go to Florida, you get the Florida prepaid, there's a lot

of ways to get college set up for your child. And I mean, again, Wendy just has to do well in high school. Yep. Man, I really do. It's not easy these days. Maybe she can become home. It's really not. She can become homecoming queen herself.

Just make sure that your weed hasn't gone missing because then she's giving it to the other kids. And I'll be mad about it. I mean, like, get your own damn stash. We also have a tale here. Now poisoning of the eye drops, that's one way to kill somebody. But evidently, there's another way that I will never be killed this way because I will never go skydiving.

So it's Easter Sunday, 2015, Nathara von Field in southern England. 40-year-old Vicki Siliers jumps from a Cessna plane at 4,000 feet with a parachute strap to her back. Unbeknownst to her, she has been sabotaged. And what starts as a fun Easter hop and pop ends in attempted murder. Yes. And unlike Jesus, you cannot rise again. So do not do this.

Do not do this. And on the ground below, watching from the parachuting facility is Vicki's 38-year-old British military sergeant husband, Emile Siliers. He watches the events unfold with his newborn baby that Vicki gave birth to only a couple months prior. Vicki falls from the sky at 60 miles per hour as her parachute begins twirling up on itself. Not good.

And she plummets to the earth from 4,000 feet. Miraculously, she does not die. She instead receives a broken pelvis and a fractured spine. How the hell did she live? Oh, how'd she not die? Okay, well, let me illustrate with a quiz. Okay. So if either of you were jumping out of a plane, which I know for both of you is a

complete and utter impossibility, your parachute starts fucking up mid-jump. There is another skydiver next to you in the air, and you notice that you are also above a grape vineyard below. Do you A, try to grab the other skydiver and hope their parachute supports you both? B, aim for the grape vineyards below? Or C, simply embrace death? I would definitely grab the person next to me. Yeah, I think I would grab the person next to me and try to use them as a surfboard,

like Silver Surfer. Okay, that's wrong. You're like, save me, save me, save me, save me, save me. So you both die. So the answer is to go limp and embrace death. Oh, no. I can't, though. The thing is, I never will.

But then you're still not happy. After you embrace death and then you don't die, you're like, I just went through all the emotions. In every case where somebody has survived a fall like this, the only reason that they live is because they hit recently plowed dirt, and that is what happened to Vicki Ciliers. Interesting. So honestly, if I would ever jump out of an airplane, which again, it would require me to be on so many BLs, and I mean Bud Lights.

I would have to be so hammered, they'd be like, that's a good idea. Let's do it. I'm going to face my fears that I would do it. And then honestly, I would go limp if I was about to crash though, because when you're hammered, your body's just like, all right, like it could go, I could maybe live. And then I would say, I would thank Bud Lights. So according to police and the parachuting facility and the courts, the day before Vicki did this jump, her husband, Emile Ciliers, who was a decorated British military sergeant,

took her backpack into the toilets and then fucked with the wires. And then the next morning he was like, hey, you should go for a jump because you just had a baby. You just had a baby nine months ago, I think you should treat yourself to a jump because she's actually an experienced parachutist. Honestly, if anybody ever strongly encouraged you, like, hey, you should go for a jump today. Yeah. Yeah, that'd be great, right?

So what do you do? You try to eat breakfast? No, go for a jump. I will say. Get up, let's go. I did just go parachuting about three weeks ago. Yeah, I don't like it. You're addicted now.

If you have a sapling of desire inside of your body to do that, I say completely embrace that. Yeah, just make sure your relationship is really strong. Make sure that no one wants to kill you in any way, shape or form. This does seem like an episode of Columbo, doesn't this seem like a Columbo murder? Well, so a week before the jump, Emile Siliers stays at his army barracks for the night and leaving his wife and two kids in their home, and he tampered with the gas. As you guys mentioned before, he tried to get the gas to explode the house, and luckily

Vicki catches it in time, fixes it, and then texts her husband, are you trying to kill me, LOL? What is going on here? If you have to ask that, if you have to ask it, he is. That's one of those, I love, if you haven't seen the gif of Kawhi Leonard laughing, it's very funny. That's one of those last words like, but seriously, you are though, right? So he tries to kill her with that, with what was more of like a traditional way to kill

someone? Okay, so we got the exploding house. Then a week later, he says, okay, let me up my game here and twist some shit up in her parachute kit. If you buy a book, like elaborate ways to kill your wife, the world's most crazy ways to kill your wife, how to make it even more different. Killing your wife the fun way. So Emil Siliers has all the traits of a classic psychopath.

Interesting. While Vicki was in her hospital bed, he was texting his girlfriend, who he had off to the side, Stephanie Gowlers, who was also a parachutist, and he was also texting his ex-wife, who he was sleeping with at the time, and also trolling for sex workers on back pages online. Wow. Interesting. What he was trying to do.

You say trolling, I say searching. Basically he was trying to make a clean getaway from Vicki. How would this make anything easier for him? I guess. That's the problem. This made his life, obviously he's going to prison forever, it made his life much more complicated than it had been. Just break up, just break up with the person.

Or don't date a skydiver. I don't trust these skydivers. They tempt death all the time. They think about death constantly. So everything becomes boring to them. Every single day. So you need to tell me, I'm dating a professional skydiver, and then I'm supposed to make love to this person, and I'm expecting that gives them a thrill.

It doesn't give them a thrill. My body isn't flying out of a plane at 12,000 feet. Basically this guy approached murder as if he were, if James Bond had like a desk job, this is the kind of shit that he would do. Well it's a good thing 007 was busy fighting all of those supervillains and saving the world multiple times over. This guy is like, he's like Deadpool. He's just like, he wants death, or I guess he wants, well I guess death, yeah Deadpool.

He never really, well none the less, whatever. He's a bad person. Well I'll also put it this way. He spent a lot of time, he could have just been figuring out, he could have been figuring out a way to get out of the relationship instead of figuring out how to murder somebody. Well he was also trying to get insurance money from Victor Scott. Ah there it is, it's the insurance money. Because he spent all of his money, he's in crippling debt because he would go off on

these excursions with Stephanie Gohler or anyone, sex worker or his ex-wife. And so he was basically trying to clean up all of his debts from his fuck vacations with all his people. I see. Yeah but it's never like that. It's never like that. It never works like that. No because the detective always turns around in his trench coat with his little cap on,

he says one more thing. Just one more thing. When he was arrested, when he was arrested, Emile only said to the cops, I'm disappointed that you would do this in front of my subordinates. Which is a very cool- Children? What a fucking bitch! His subordinates, he was a sergeant in the army.

Oh my god. Oh what a cry baby. I'm sorry you got caught on your perfect crime. I don't under, like the idea of making the perfect crime, if this is like, if you're ever in the middle of a crime plan and you're like, this is the perfect crime. You might as well just buy handcuffs on Amazon and just like, just take yourself to the police department. Right.

It never is. You don't understand, human life is far stranger than you want it to be. Things are not cut and dry. So speaking of gaslighting someone, if you also, if you feel like you're being gaslit in a relationship, you most likely are being gaslit. This woman- You feel us. Yes.

If you feel like it, it is happening. This woman was mentally bullied by this, by Emile. Victoria was mentally bullied by this guy to the point where so much evidence was presented in front of the court that Emile was the person who sabotaged your parachute. She initially acquiesced and said, yep, I guess that's the case. You're showing me all the evidence and also you're showing me all the text message records of this guy cheating on me constantly. And then halfway through the court or halfway through the trial, she becomes a hostile witness

to her own murder case because she says, no, this can't be the case. Emile loves me. Oh, no. He couldn't have possibly tried to kill me. Oh, no. She went all the way reverse. She just lost. She's completely gone.

So yeah. So she became like a Stockholm syndrome resident. Oh, well, not what happened. Was he found guilty? So actually last May of this year, Emile was sentenced to prison for life. All right. Very good. And she can walk and everything?

She actually made a miraculous recovery. That's incredible. All right. Well, hopefully she gets the help she needs to because obviously this guy had quite a grip on her mind. Yes. We'll speak. Now, remember this, guys, if they're all of the signs are in front of you, if unfortunately

you find a folder on your loved ones desktop that says how to kill Cheryl, you know, for a fact that's like, it's not a bit, even if he says it's a bit, no, it's the heat. That's not a good bit. Oh my. Well, speaking of mind control, let's do this story. We talked about it a little bit last week. It's from an article. There's a lot of articles, but this one's called leave this the name of this article

or the title of this article is leave no dark corner. So we'll just start you on this story a little bit more kind of to extend the conversation we had last week and we'll just follow this story throughout the year here in the years to come because it really is out of the television show Black Mirror. It's not an episode though. This is happening in real life. So it's a dystopian vision of the future. It's already happening in China.

The Communist Party calls it a social credit system and it's supposed to be fully operational by 2020. On the last episode, Henry said, how are they tracking the people? Evidently, they're going to use RFID chips to track the people's movements, their cars, and obviously all the CCTV cameras or all the CCTV cameras that are all around China. So this is really a crazy story. What's going to happen is within years and official party outline claims, it will, quote, allow the trustworthy to roam freely under heaven while making it hard for the disc

credited to take a single step. If that's not horrifying, I don't know what is the social credit is like a personal scorecard for each of China's 1.4 billion citizens in one pilot program already in place. Each citizen has been assigned a score out of 800 in other programs that's around 900 and citizens with top scores get VIP treatment at hotels, airports, cheaper loans and fast track to the best universities and jobs. Yeah, buddy. No, it's about to things are really going down in China.

We're seeing it happen from the top down there. We're here in the United States where we are sort of doing it to ourselves in terms of our own personal monitoring of ourselves and the giving into the what the corporatocracy buying these phones, buying all these things that are constantly tracking us. It's very interesting. We're going to be on a point in time where do you really feel it's best to live in a world where well, as long as I have nothing to hide and there's nothing wrong and the idea of slowly but surely obliterating the idea of descent, the idea that you can't

even have thoughts in your own mind. There's no way you can behave this constant idea that everyone has to be perfect up all these perfect little angels with no pass that we have no weird views. We have nothing about us. It's a little janky. This creating a homogenized group of perfect spherical brains. It is horrifying. And if you go to this article, they show with the CCTV cameras or the CCTV cameras look

like and they show how they monitor the people. And again, so basically folks who are, you know, it's interesting. I was thinking about this in the context of our credit score system. And so in the US, we have our credit score system. That's just for real, dude. Well, yeah. And that's just for real. And I remember when I had bad credit, I was fucked.

Yes. You have bad credit and you that is a indication of your self-worth that it's an indication to how worthy you are of getting good loans or getting into the nice communities and things like that. In the US, however, you can build your credit score up, but of course, we do have these kind of social systems in our country, too. This takes that to the next level without, to say the least, it's like real life clout. It really is like real life clout.

Because a part of it is that your credit score, yes, we can increase it and it's got a subtle effect on your life. It does. Things are, things are fucked up. I mean, like it's hard to get a car, it's hard to get a house, as hard to do that kind of things. It's a very subtle social deflection or something like this where it's really, really overt. And then if you listen to, they interviewed several citizens, which I'm certain we obviously

don't have the entire purview of the situation because it's going to be people that are only positively speaking about it. Well, who would say anything bad about it? I would never say anything bad about it. Yeah, they say they're saying, oh, we're getting used to it, though. Getting used to it, though. That's absolutely horrifying. I mean, that's an interesting thing coming back to our culture here, a lot of companies

when it comes to social media clout, they'll target people who have more of a following on Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat, all of these things. And they'll request that they become influencers and things like that. So it's interesting how we weigh our clout as well. So we're not squeaky clean on this by any means. And certainly New York City is a surveillance state. But this, again, really takes it to the next level because if you don't have a lot of social media followers, you're still free to roam the streets.

The government's not going to be staying your home. Part of the way the United States works, what seems to be, is an unrepentant obsession with being famous. And a part of the way that they do it in our capitalist system is that we're supposed to... The idea is reward those that are super successful. And so a part of it now is that people are seeing the writing on the wall. Is that if you, if I, with a verified check, if I tweet at Delta, like if I have a problem with Delta, Delta gets right back to me.

Right. Like they'll go into it because it's like, because I have the followers I can do what I want. People see that. They understand that in a way, it's not equal. It's automatically in this little section here where it's not equal, that people are getting a little bit more of a, you get more customer service. You get this thing.

Right. Where eventually everybody, and look at Taylor Swift now, being really intense with her political views and it's saying it's doubling voter registration in Tennessee. It's actually having a palpable effect. And so now we're going to see more and more people driven towards being famous doing whatever it takes. And this weird, gigantic, self-fulfilling machine where you are nobody unless you're famous. It's very, it's very, it's very strange.

We are sliding into transmit so fucking fast that our heads are spinning. Transmetropolitan is one of the greatest comic books ever. What were you going to say, Travis? It's just interesting that like Ai Weiwei, which is one of the biggest political dissident voices of China, or he's no longer in China, but he has an Instagram following of 500,000 people. And so it's almost like as we go forward, the battle between authoritarian organizations like the Chinese government and the voices of dissident are going to be fought, it's

going to be fought on social media. It's interesting, right? Because it's true, because a part of what Trump showed right was just the power of talking directly to the voters is what actually swung bullshit his way. And then what happened is that we are doing the same thing where it's you have these amassable clouds of many populations that can be used like hammers against the powers that be. But of course Twitter is also, it's problematic in its own right, speaking of authoritarianism. I believe that they have threads of that.

And Google naturally just goes along with everything the Chinese government wants. So their Google is quite different. That's why, again, you got to use Bing, or Duck's Duck Go. I don't want to use Bing. I heard Duck's Duck Go. I heard that's good. Anyway, so just- Technically we should be downloading, technically everyone should be downing Tor browsers to

start getting on the fucking, that's where we start going into the breakaway internet. That's next. I love that. Which I think will be very interesting. They should. And so just again, going back to this story here, the folks on the bottom are going to be locked out of society, banned from travel, barred from getting credit, or any government jobs.

The system will be enforced by the latest high-tech surveillance systems as China pushes to become the world leader in artificial intelligence. So the future is now, and I got to say, it's not as fun as when I watched it in sci-fi films when I was like, it's kind of cool. Like it's fun to watch, and then you still had a normal society. But indeed, that's the war to come. So we'll keep- Embrace it, man.

You know what I'm saying? Embrace the madness. Control it. Let's be better with it. The Chinese people said they're doing right now with this social credit program. That's not what I mean. I don't mean like, it's not go along with it. It's just understand where we're at.

Understand that this is the- what we're at right now is that things are very overwhelming and it feels like it's going at light speed. It is going very fast. But you can catch up by keeping yourself educated, understand where things are headed, and keep your own personal life together. Like love your family, do what you love, do all this stuff. Try to hold it. Don't be swayed by the entire machine because you're also watching the machine whip you

up into a place where you're entirely controllable. So even the woman that they follow in this study, she works for the government, loyal Chinese citizen. She's only at 770 out of 800, so she can't even get a perfect score. Anyway, so we will continue to follow that story for you as they start to implement it. It should be coming in next year. And my God, I mean, China, talk about- it's just very bizarre to see this happening again in our lifetime because technology is allowing it and we have to be very adamant and control

technology to be better, to make good things for us, not all to be at. All right, well, there you go. I guess that- Well, there you go. There you go. Well, there you go then. Okay, everyone. Well, thank you so much.

I think we fixed it. I think we fixed it. We always fix it. You know? We always fix it. Every show we fix it, we fix it, we fix it. Okay. Well, thank you all so much for listening.

We love you very much. Thanks for giving to our Patreon. You guys are the greatest. Let's see. Anything else, Henry? Do we have any announcements to make? Next week we'll be doing Listener Pasta. I'm very excited to get spooky again.

Keep it out. Like we've been watching horror movies. I'm making my way through the Hellraisers. Oh, yeah. I will say, man, Hellraiser 3, it drops off. Well, that franchise, I love Clive Barker. I really do. But at some point they just- I think they stopped writing scripts.

My pinhead becomes a little bit more of like an anti-hero. Right. Right. Yes. Which is good and bad. I was watching- I watched the original Saw last night with Brooke and I got to say, first of all, it's not nearly as gory as I remember. And I miss when Jigsaw was actually still bad because now they did the same thing with

him wherever he actually praises him because they found life through him torturing them, which I don't think- All of that shit. I don't think that's normal. It makes escape rooms that give you like a moral sense of clarity. Yes. Exactly. Yes.

Once he becomes a moral warrior, then it's like, what are we doing here? What's happening? This is like, I just- I want to watch a horror movie. Yes. Please, Lord. I don't need to see- But we're- We're getting so close.

I will also say, at this point when this episode drops, the Detective Popcorn plushies will be available. Hey! So, go to left. I guess what, man, Detective Popcorn, when you have that plushie, you'll never be alone. You could have it in your car, you could have it in if they let you take it through security at prison. If you're ever letting- if you're going to prison, maybe you can take it, I'm not sure.

And guess what? What I'm going to advise against you, please don't fuck it. There's no reason to fuck it. I'm not- I'm maybe even putting it in your head is a bad idea. Right, I thought that was- Please don't carve a hole into it and fuck the Detective Popcorn plushie while making the voice. It's not- it's not good.

It's not right. You just put that out into the universe. So, we know for a fact it's going to happen at least once now. All right, everyone. Thank you all so much for listening. Hail yourselves! You could give your chance. If you're out there in your 11, you'll go to make sure you're alive.

And then if you're alive in any 11, you'll definitely be learning. And you'll love it when you live in your 11, you'll learn. Now that's an accent I can't even place. That's uh, European. Ah! Ka mei mei unai, which is how Furby says I love you. Oh, that's very nice. Oh, thank you.

143, 143, I love you. That's from the Mr. Rogers documentary. Yeah, that's Mr. Rogers' obsessive compulsive way of saying he loves you. Thank you all so much for watching, and I'll see you in the next one.