Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: The Burbank Butt-Sniffer

Episode Date: July 31, 2025

Henry & Eddie bring you this week's weirdest stories and true crime news - starting with the story of the week: The Burbank Butt-Sniffer - Known public nuisance and local deviant, busted AGAIN for sneaky sniffings in Burbank, THEN - The boys react to the new unidentified (possibly hostile) Interstellar object heading towards Earth, the Arkansas couple murdered by mysterious attacker on hiking trail with history of alien abduction, Listener E-Mails, and MORE! For Live Shows, Merch, and More Visit: www.LastPodcastOnTheLeft.comKevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Last Podcast on the Left ad-free and a whole week early. Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus.

There's no place to escape to. This is the last podcast. On the left. Side stories? That's when the cannibalism started. Side stories. Yes. Oh, yes.

Um, first of all, I want to say thank you to everybody who reached out to me. All the kind support I had over this very difficult weekend. What happened? I buried my father this weekend. With the help of Marcus and Eddie, Marcus did try to step in for the Gravedigger. Yes. One of the best characters of the weekend.

Oh, my God. Sorry for your loss. That's how we wrapped up the ceremony. Very scary man. Honestly, it was very nice. A guy had a beard, he could have tucked into his pants. Sorry for your loss. He's like,

Literally, like, if you, all right, close your eyes right now, think the word gravedigger. That's the guy. Sorry for your loss. Tampening down the hole that they put the vase that was inside. He was very good at his job. Super pro, big pro. But I want to reach out to anybody that sent me this book that, like, I feel like I'm attacked. Someone sent the book Joy in for me to read.

As if I don't experience it. Oh, really? And people who understand, I'm the most joyful person you've ever met. I don't think you can give a mad person a book called joy and expect them to have a good time. If you hand me a book called joy, guess what it turns into? A man called anger. Because it's nice. Thanks.

But I don't need a whole joy to. I need a whole book to feel joy. You know what I need to feel joy? What? A fucking six pack. A bunch of ribs. My AK-47. Ah, you love your AK-47.

Me, my AK-47, we sleep together each night. You're lighting your joints with it. Oh, yes, it's covered in lipstick. For me kissing it and hugging it. Like, I'm Leonyssen and my gun is Pamela Anderson. It's really nice you can put a little dress on it. Yeah, they're dating. Are they dating?

Apparently. I love it they're dating. I think it's wonderful. I think it's wonderful. I honestly, I love it. I think it's really cool. But I heard there was a rumor. that it's not true. That they're not dating.

They're only saying they are for the movie. Oh, it's very possible. It's very possible. But I hope they're not lying because I'm not lying to you, my dearest audience, when I say, thank you for all your support. And thanks for the joy. Get it out of here. Yes. Are you going to read Joy?

No. Welcome to Side Stories. My name is Henry Sabrowski. Would you like to burn it? I've never gotten to burn a book before. I know. We could burn this one. It's free. Yeah, I don't. No. Honestly, practice. I'll thumb through. We'll take your mustache in and we'll burn the book. And I'm sitting here with Ed Larson.

How you doing, buddy? I'm fine. It was actually a nice weekend. Grieving over, done. Yeah. Book closed, grieving completed. Yeah, it's never going to come back at all. You're never going to think about it once again.

Smooth sailing. I never think about my dead parents. No, it doesn't come up at all. It's not like I made a movie or anything. No, I am just going to, me, ready to go. I'm my own father. I don't need a father anymore. No, yeah.

Because I have me. Yeah, you are your father. Yes. Yes. Search for new daddy. Well, we have to announce that later on. We're not ready to announce that yet. Okay, all right.

So just, you know, we'll bleep it out. Pretend I said cunt. Keeping that cunt, though. Keeping that cunt. We made it past the mark. We made it past the mark. I will say this weekend, I've been in a lot of funerals. I think it was an interesting thing.

We're all, like, going around. Like, some people were like, this is my first funeral. This is my first, whatever. I'm like, I've been way over 20. I don't even know the number. And definitely my most stoned funeral. Great. And I, you know, I brought a lot of weed.

Y'all brought a lot of weed. Yes. I'm very impressed with our level of weed intake. Well, I saved it for after, right? I buried him sober. Yeah. Oh, I mean, it was early. Yeah.

And then later on, it was a morning-ass funeral. If you've ever had, I mean, I just feel like it's like, it's nice to get it done with. But it's just like hard. It's a way to start the day. Yeah. It was real early in the morning. It's crazy because I'm there with you and Jackie, and I got to say, if there's two people in this world that I've had the most beers with, it's probably the two of you.

Close. And it was like a sober, other than the weed, a pretty sober weekend. Well, yeah, it's because I was with my mom doesn't really, he doesn't into it. I'm not trying to. My father was an alcoholic. I know, but usually, like, funerals hammered, you know, as a funeral connoisseur. I actually prefer the weed-based funeral way more than the boo's-based funeral. I think I do now.

I think it's much, I think it's way more important because the boo's one, I mean, it's just going to get you sadder. I really do. That's what's really changed. The weed is numbing. Yeah, well, it's nice. And then I stop to feel things. So that's what I do. Now I have to not smoke weed so that I can process my feelings with my fucking therapist, which I'm going to do.

You're such a fucking pussy. Yeah, dude. He can't handle me, dude. He had to take eight weeks off for parental leave because he had a baby. Oh, yeah. Yeah, whatever, dude. Baby don't need therapy.

Can't handle he eat, huh? Of your main dish, Mr. Rose Beef, who's got daddy issues? But don't worry, I'm writing in the big journal. I got a big journal. Some people call it a manifesto. That is what I'm slowly but surely carving out, but don't worry, ladies and gentlemen,

you'll see the fruit of those labors next year. Notice they don't call it a woman a festive. Not once. Because women just kill you slow and they don't tell you why they're killing you. Yeah, well, they talk you to death. Oh, come on. A lot of times they poison you. Oh, they love for it.

Most of the times they poison you. Yeah, yeah. I actually did talk to someone tangentially connected to the ghost adventures crew. Are they mad at us? No, no, they're fine. I mean, like, they're just in a whole world of hurt. But the fact that that lady, the guy's wife that tried to get put out a hit on him, that talk with the guy that killed his family.

Dude, did you watch any of that? Yeah, where she was just like, the cops were pretending that he was dead? Yes. And then, like, she was just like, oh my God. It is very, very fucked. That was like one piece of course, of course footage I watched this week.

Also, the Aaron Goodwin story, it's so sad. All that stuff is just so sad with him, with his wife. But she was connected to three other family in I letters. Really? She was talking to all of these like murderers and death row that she was having emotional affairs with and then she also was having because Gran Amato, that was the main

dude she was kind of talking with who killed his family after giving all of their family's money to an only fan's chick in fucking Bulgaria or whatever and then when he told her he doesn't he's like my whole family said it might be going to jail she went oh no no fucking reaction

I think if your wife is constantly picking up the phone and saying the words yes I accept the charges you got to keep an eye on her dude dude but she was having not just like grand amato didn't even understand that she was cheating on him with other murderers in jail so you can't trust the trifler no once a cheater always a cheater doesn't matter how many of your members of your family you've killed yeah it seems like you can just call them human adventures because they seem to be more dangerous than your ghost

adventures very much so they might need to start focusing on people because people have the scariest of all but grant you know this is just It's just hard. I trust my wife. Yeah. I don't think she's going to... I don't think she's plotting to kill me with anybody else. I don't think she could.

Oh, she could. Oh, emotionally. I don't think Natalie could hurt somebody. No, definitely not. No, she's due kind. But she would definitely... But, you know, husbands are different. Yeah.

They are different. Husbands just get fucking... This part of the couch smells bad now. Yep. Sorry. That's just my body. It's the one chair I sit in, and then for some reason I've made it disgusting with just my back.

I didn't know I could do what my father did. Also, I do find it interesting. And I was saving this for the show for Eddie, is that none of us were wanted to sit in my father's chair in the backyard. Oh, it was comfortable. Yeah. I could tell it was his chair. Yeah.

No, when I sat in it, I was like, this is nice. Well, that's where he kind of lived and died. He was in that chair, yeah. Yeah, it works. We were all superstitious. want to sit in that chair. Someone had to sit in a chair. It's right in the middle. I know. But I was good. It was good. I was commanding the conversation.

You did very good. You lit up a cigarette by lighting another cigarette. And I do think that that's how you really represented my father. And did I sit in the same spot in the couch, too? Yes. In the corner? Yeah. That seemed like it was his spot only because that's where the teddy bear was. And so not that your dad played with the teddy bear, but the teddy bear was made out from his clothes. And so I thought, I'm like, as I'm sitting there and like, the bear is on top of me, I'm like, this is probably a spot. Also, my mom in pure

my mom is like, you have to understand too is that like for an Italian woman to become a widow is like graduating from college. That once you finally get

that place, this is what you've been angling for your whole life. The way she gave out all of the five possessions that my father had is just so brutal. I didn't get nothing. She literally was like, who wants his gun?

Who wants his gun? You know, it's just like, just woman that stays in Florida. That gun goes nowhere. Why do you have his gun? Someone should come looking for the gun. No, it was not his service revolver. It was not his service revolver. He gave that up when he retired.

It was just his gun. Yes. But still. No, dude. A lot of guns floating around. It's interesting because, like, it's on record that he owns a gun and that he's dead. No one's asking a question about where the gun is. They are, well, now we're in the process.

That seems like a law that should be, it should exist. We're working on it right now. Don't worry about it. We're cleaning it up. Doop. Boop. Boop. Boop boop bo bo bo bo bo bo bo bo bo bo bo bo bo bo bo bo bo bo bo.

Hello, jade me to talk to you. Let me talk to you. I got a fucking, please let me talk a huge fan. Can't wait to meet you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, you see what I did. Yeah, I didn't say what I did in her microphone. See, that's how you get away with it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're growing. See? That's nice. Because I know that sometimes they put AIs in there to listen. That's what's happening. Oh, is that what's happening?

Oh, sure. No, let's fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. You dirty bitch. Yeah, I'm going to fill your gears, you little girl. You goddamn lazy clanker.

I love that clankers. I love that new term. For robots? That's a thing someone put in some tweet, the idea of like, don't you hate it when you call up the phone service and you get some goddamn clanker on the line? I love it.

That's a great slur. for AI. Yeah. That's great. Man, good. Because robots they're like the only thing you can be racist to. I mean, hopefully until they could vote. Oh, one more cancellation around the fucking... Oh, we're going to have to

say, I'm sorry for this episode. Ten years. All right, here we go. Let's go. So we got some news. We don't have a lot of fucking news, but the news that we have is pretty good. Okay. So first of all, I'm going to start silly. Silly?

I'm going to start with us with what we cover best the Burbank butt sniffer has been arrested now I this is a story that got sent to me

many many times now I don't necessarily want to make light of the idea of public sexual assault I'm not going to make light of it but a butt sniffer is arguably the most unique version of this

that I have seen and if you see the man and the culprit who did it calise Karan Crowder 38 years young you'd actually wonder why he wasn't called the butt listener. Yes. Because the man has, I am not joke, I am, this is not an exaggeration, for ears, he has two trombones. That is the largest, whitest ears I have ever seen on a person.

Because I don't even know if you'd call that cauliflower ear. No, it's not cauliflower ear, because cauliflower ear has like a shape to it. Like, what are those ears? Was that man pulled by his ears by a tractor trailer? I think he was able to get away with this so long by able to listen that no one was sneaking up behind him. Oh my God, do you think he put his ear down to the ground

like one of those Native American trackers and he could hear where butts were? Like there's a big badonka donk over there. Now, someone's twerking on Isle 7. Oh, I got to go. I got to smell the drift. Nothing like a butt drift. Now, I actually, so we have footage here.

So this man, I guess I'd been around town. This was footage that was shot in Glendale. goes to various shopping areas. Is it always a bookstore or is that just where he got caught? Nordstrom Rack, you know. He was at the rack. He also was like two bookstores. And I think the reason why he's actually bookstores.

It's a very specific set of circumstances that help his crimes. So what he would do, it seems, is that he'd get down low. Now, you've seen this video here. So many people have come to me saying that they recognize the guy. It felt like anywhere I moved, he kept following me. So I recorded just in case he was trying to say anything or do anything to me. But I definitely didn't expect him to do this. Like, what the action?

Pretending to be, like, crouching down by a bookshelf and then coming behind me and smelling me. And he does the same thing to another girl. Yeah. So what you could see is that he's down on the ground. He's pretending like he's looking at the bottom shelf of books. Yes. And then he does this thing where he goes and he's, uh, let's just, you know, no uncertain terms. He sniffs the butt.

Yeah. But this is my thing. When you're, I'm not saying that there's nothing, it's not about technique or whatever, but have you ever smelled the pants of a woman? No. Try it. A lot of pants now, it seems, I might be wrong, side stories LPOTL. I do my wife's laundry.

I can give this a shot. But while they're on, while they're on it, is that there's, I think there's, isn't there material in a lot of these yoga pants that specifically cut down the smell that can escape the butt. I mean, I think ladies just clean themselves better than we do. No, I mean, not necessarily. Depends on what part of the fucking monetary cycle we're at. Okay.

Because I wonder if, like, if you smell at a woman's butt, if you just smell at a woman's butt, if you just like, what kind of smell are you even getting out of it? Like, the thing, I feel like you really got to be up in it. His nose does get very close

to the crack. He's a little too adventurous for sure. Oh, he's flying close of the buns. That is for certain. Like, he has got to be careful. His wings will melt. Obviously, this is like a beatable offense, but what is the crime? Well, yes, the crime is this.

I do think that you are violating somebody's personal space. You're smelling their butt. People don't like it. People get super upset about it. He was arrested for this because now we have some footage of him smelling butts. Yes. But I guess it's like, I am glad he's not, because we've had butt slashers. Do we know what his charges?

I think it's, I think he's doing a legal nose-based activity. I'm pretty certain that's how they actually got a lot of people in the old days with the coke charges. Yeah, I think it's, well, it's obviously sexual assault. Yeah. You'd call it or sexual harassment, at least. Yes. Because if he's not touching you, I actually don't know.

Side stories, L-P-O-T-L-G-Mell.com here. What is the available crimes? It says he was arrested and charged with loitering with intent to commit a crime. Sure. I guess that's, though, if you're going to get him, that's how you'd immediately pick him up. because he's in a corporate, he's in a private business. Yeah. I'm not sticking up for him, but this feels like that's not good enough to hold water in court.

It might, I feel like there's a lot of people that are going to say this, and I'll say to them, they're like, oh, it's because you're a butt sniff and pervert that just wants to create a legal loophole for yourself. But I think that there are people that would say that you're going to be, I think, a jury. I think if you put this in front of a jury, I mean, he's obviously. We're obviously sniffing this woman's butt, and we do know that is wrong. Yes. Now, if you put it in front of a jury, first of all, how do you build that jury for people that would be fair to this crime? You're going to have people that are like, yeah, of course, sniffing butts is America. My nose is as free as my feet.

Yeah. You mean to tell me they can't sniff your butt. I think the key is physical proximity is that if I could smell your butt from here, that's your problem, right? But don't you have to wait until actual, like, contact is made for assault? I don't think so. I don't think so. Okay. Does this change anything?

In 2023, he was allegedly caught peeping into a family's home in Glendale, but he was released later due to the jail being overcrowded. Okay. And he was also re-arrested for failing to register with the local police. I wonder what it's like. Yeah. I wonder what it's like eating dinner. I wonder what it's like having father. Ask me how my day was.

Is that what he's peeping at? No, he's not trying to look at the family for their... Oh, I wish someone would ask me what. my day was like, I'd say, well, Dad, I sniffed a butt this morning. And now I'm here eating liver and onions with you. Now can I smell your butt? Because I'm just

looking for a butt to kneel. People are really saying here, wow, the wife of former L.A. Lakers forward Robert Horrie accused this man, the butt sniffer, of stalking their teenage daughter

more than a decade prior. Oh, geez. She said that he should be put away for good. I agree that this is one of those crimes, but this is one of those crimes that is no way is not going to escalate. He's going to escalate. There is something, this is very similar to me to the very nefarious beginnings of the Lake Tahoe toe sucker and a guy grabbing people's feet and guys doing stuff like that, right? Like on some level, like, but that is in physical assault.

Yes, but this is still a violation of people's personal space. I'm not saying don't lock this guy up. I'm just saying we got to make sure we got the right charge. I know I'm with you, Eddie. I just don't know how much smells he's getting out of just pants. I just feel like if you're wanting to really smell a woman's butt, but you're going to have to pay a lady to get her underwear. I don't think this guy's got money.

Oh, yeah. It is the issue. I don't think he's got it. So is this a monetary issue. Would a UBI stop butt sniffers? You know, it's one of those things where I always like. Outside Stories, O-P-O-D-L at g-mell.com. It's about the thrill.

You know, it's about... Oh, yes, definitely. It's about the thrill. No, you want to sneak a sniff, but it's very difficult to get. I always thought about that about, like, Harvey Weinstein. Why didn't he just, like, get, you know, sex workers? Well, it's called transgression. It's because it's the transgression.

He likes the fact that he can lord the power over you. It's not about the sex. He likes the fact that he has something that you want from him, and he's going to try to get what he can from you. And that is the main problem with this situation. Well, yes, it's sniffing butts. It's not because, you know, like some people, you could smell someone's perfume. Yes. But you're also not going to stick your face in their neck to get it.

No. Unless you're a cool guy. If you're like a kind of romantic guy. Also, perfume is something you put on for other people to smell. Yes. Your butt, you don't sit there and be like, I can't wait for someone to smell this butt. Or if you are, you know, you got it scheduled. Yeah.

Or you put perfume in your butt. Or you just got a stinky butt. Which isn't a horrible idea, by the way. No, it's not. And a stinky butt, some people like the perfume of just that. Yeah. All right? But normal, you have an appointment for that.

And you know what's going to happen. It just doesn't happen to you at the Barnes & Noble while you're reading the Hillary Clinton memoir. Man, I would love to just make this guy smell my farks for a while. See, that's what I think. That should be a punishment. It's like you hire me to drink a case of IPA. I think that's exactly what this. We go shit in this man's mouth.

This man should have to go to a Delta lounge at 8.45 in the morning and experience true ass. Because that's the thing. Right now, when you sniffing cute girls' butts, right, that's sniffing butt. This motherfucker needs to experience some man ass. Yes. Which is a full on me having eaten a bunch of curry at 11 p.m. the night before. I drank four beers in my bed. watching forensic files.

I've now gotten two hours of sleep. I'm at the airport. I just said the words, I'm so sick. I don't feel good, man. That's what he needs to experience being like, because then if you can smell, if you can, that's what he likes, right? If you like fucking farts, it should be like, yeah,

when your father finds you smoking a cigarette, and he makes you smoke the whole paddock. Yeah. Now you've got to fucking have the most farts at once, and if that still makes you hard, if that makes them hard, then I think we should... Beat him to death? Yeah. Yeah. No, I, no, we shouldn't beat him to death

I just think that we should just We should find a way for him to get Like, is there like a methadone of ass? Yeah. If there's like a thing he could get That could curb his Like, he'd just fart in a jar And he could just

Can they hypnotize him? Oh, permanent closed pin Super glue clothespin to his nose. Whoa, chemical castration I really pissed him a butt sniffer. I do think that you get, hmm, maybe there's a hypnotism here that can make butts smell good.

Here, that's already, he's got that already. But I need, like, the opposite. Oh, so, like, if all butts did smell good, maybe he would stop sniffing butts. Because I think he likes to smell farts and butt. Yeah. Yeah. Well, we'll find out. Either way, he's getting locked up.

No more butt sniffer in our town. I can throw my ass out in any neighborhood Burbank store and not worry about this man catching a whiff. Yep, because when I fart, I'm farting for the community. $100,000 bail. Yeah. Well, that's only You only got to pay 10% of that.

It's still 10 grand. This man's sniffing butts as a hobby. I don't think he's got it. You know, I am actually very thankful that he gave him a pretty high bond for this because I do think that he's on his way to doing something extremely bad. Do you think he has a pubic defender? I hope so. I hope so.

Hi, hello. I'm your pubic air lawyer. Yeah. Yep. As you could see, unshorn. Why would I? You see my pub window? Yes, I do that to show the judge. I mean business. Now let's get the stiffing butts, shall we? Live from your play.

Here's another story. Now, if anybody's been following Jeremy Corbell. Oh, this is so interesting. Friend of the show. Part of, you know, he's with George Knapp, our favorite investigative reporter for their show weaponized. Jeremy Corbell has received several pieces of, I would say, shit from the audience over the years. People obviously, you know, they're not... Our audience?

I mean, every audience. But they're always nice, our audience. They're so kind. I know. But Jeremy Corbell, obviously, he's a bit of a salesman edge to him, so I think some people don't really like, like, he rubs people wrong. But the man's heart is in the right place, and he's obsessed with finding out the truth. Now, Jeremy Corbell and George Knapp have been talking about the concept of disqual. disclosure for a very long time

and the idea. That's that to me more film. Ooh, yeah, it is. But that's not what I'm talking about. Great film, though. That's a sexy film. That's the one where she's the boss. She pulls it on the guy, right? That's a whole thing. Yeah, yeah. That's nice. Michael Douglas didn't have a chance. Not a fucking shot. You got to keep your job, bro.

Yeah, she's got them about his own. Yeah. Oh, hell. All right, let's move on. Sorry, I digress. So for years, the UFO community, years, since the beginning of the UFO community, we've been talking about this concept of disclosure and this idea. Yeah, one day, the government will either be compelled by either their own purposes or by just the sheer love of truth that they will come out and tell us every single thing they know about UFOs. They've been hiding for years and it's going to come and it's going to come any day, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I mean, I feel like if they had anything, now would be the exact time.

to release all that information. Oh, believe me. Because, like, he's releasing, Trump's releasing anything but the Epstein file. It's like anything but it. Also, I don't know if you noticed the thing with Trump, just basically admitting that the, uh, the, the land deal between him and Epstein was actually never the fight. He was angry that he scooped Virginia Jufre and the other 16 year old masseus he had on Mar-a-Lago. And he said those words into a camera. Yeah. He just said it out loud. And that's the woman who accused them and then committed suicide after Pierce, Swiss, Swiss, Swiss, Swiss,

yes. Yes. Yes, Virginia Schuphrey. Yes, absolutely. So we know that he's super honest. So we know they're looking to release anything right now. And for a long time that, like, well, last like two, three years, the term that's really been, has been the concept of catastrophic disclosure. So

one version is that they will create a legal venue for whistleblowers to tell their stories. That's, I think that David Gresh did, and a couple of these various, we've seen these, like, government entities trying to, like, hold conferences talking about UFOs, and they're saying, oh, we're going to create this transparent reporting system, blah, blah, blah, nothing, right? All that fucking completely shut down.

No one's doing any of that. And then they said catastrophic disclosure was going to happen, meaning that someone was just going to leak really crazy information. I was going to come out and I was going to change the face of the world, blah, blah, we haven't seen that yet either. Jeremy Corbell, who now is my friend, it's nice. But he messages me late at night, footage of UFO. This is actually quite scary.

And he shows all the stuff. Some of it gets debunk. Some of it doesn't. But mostly what Jeremy Corbell has been saying now, I find very interesting. So his latest theory is that even just the idea of disclosure has been put out as a sort of psychological warfare technique. Now, we know the United States government, as much as they say that they don't care, they obviously give a sure. shit, right, because they have spent years, decades, infiltrating UFO research groups with various intelligence operatives.

They care enough about the information to lie about. And we know that. Yeah, we know they're not telling us everything. But why, right? It gets a big thing. Why? Why, why? Because they're worried we're going to flip out.

That's part of it. They think it's going to destroy the social hierarchies. It's going to destroy religion. It's going to destroy all of them. But then there were some things that were like, yeah, no, that is our foot. and that, we don't know what that is. That is a UAP. And then everyone didn't care.

Which is because people don't care. And also, because the main issue is stuff like, you know, many people are still to this day, absolutely devoted members of the Catholic Church, even though it's filled with job molesters. So you notice you don't need to shake it up. No one's going to get shaken up from their religious anything. Nothing's going to do that, right? So that's like, but that's why they keep saying, like, all of these, these reasons, reasons why. But it's seeming it's because they don't know what the hell is going on. And now there's a new line of thought that's very interesting. And Jeremy Corbel believes that his new concept of disclosure is that the United States government is going to lie. And it's going to say that there is going to be a giant ship on its way. We're tracking it. So it's going to be a lie, though.

So he's saying this doesn't exist. No, that there is nothing on its way. But they're going to use this as a way to shut people up about the subject and also to create a fun timeline for them. It creates this thing of like, oh, we'll tell everybody in the next 100 years as it's coming, right? When is it supposed to come? Whenever. So everyone's like, all right. All right, Jeremy Carbell. Maybe.

Who knows? Cut to. As he's saying this, the New York Post drops this article. Very reliable. But it's, that's why, though, it's a mechanism, Eddie. Yeah. Rare interstellar object, the size of Manhattan, could be an alien probe, according to Harvard scientists. Harvard scientists, same people who took Jeffrey Epstein's money.

So these guys are, you know, they are now saying that they have tracked this giant Manhattan-sized object that is outside of solar system. They said they found it in July 1st. It's going at 140,000 miles per hour. It's fast. Oh, very, very, very fast. Avi Loeb, who's like the big UFO Harvard guy, he says it's technically this is what they call it's the only, it's the third interstellar traveling object ever detected. He is saying that he thinks it could be an intelligently directed alien craft observing Earth with possibly hostile intentions. The hypothesis is in question is that this object is a technological artifact and furthermore has active intelligence.

if this is the case, then two possibilities follow, according to Dr. Avi Loeb. First, that its intentions are entirely benign, and second, they are malign. Great. So, no, you know, no answer anything. No answer. Now, but it seems, they're saying that it changed directions and it made a tilt, and it's made, like, all this stuff, but it's a direct offshoot of what Jeremy Corbello is saying, of this idea of creating a phantom object that.

it's on its way. And I don't know. I don't know. Because I personally still believe that it is not as simple as things that live on another planet. The object's got a very close encounters vibe. Yes. It is, it's very interesting looking. It is a bunch of, it looks like a giant line in the sky. It's actually, it is with lights. Yes. It's very frightening, actually. But also, could be completely made up. No fucking idea. Yes. And so my end question, you, Eddie, is, why then lie about it now? Why lie now? Why do anything? Why not just let it die? Well, here's the thing about lying about it now, which is why I don't know if they are, because it's not like this is a popular thing. You know, this isn't like... You don't think,

I actually weirdly do think it's a popular thing. I don't, but I haven't read about it or heard about it until right before we walked in here. I mean, I just, but you see, what that does is that that article floods throughout all the UFO subredits, floods throughout all of the conspiracy theory websites, it just floods. So it's what you'd call something like a limited hangout

where you drop it in this little piece of this little thing and then everybody, because it's because it's so nonchalantly saying such a wild speculation, it travels fast. Yeah. But I do, you know, I think a lot of

times, whenever I read the news, I like to, like, use my deductive reasoning, like, who's telling me the news? Like, it's coming from the New York Post. Exactly. It's very right-leaning, you're correct. Uh, newspaper. And so I feel like it's obviously, not obviously, I feel like there's a really good chance. This is an incredible distraction post, a very distraction based article. From what? You know, and then if you want to, like, because right now they're losing their conspiracy theory base, you know, all those, and so why not throw a really crazy conspiracy story at all of us to get us cooking. Well, the new one's now going to be.

Well, the very big conspiracy theories that are about to come shooting down the pipe, you fucking bet money on this, is that Jislane Maxwell is going to point fingers at anybody but Trump. I mean, why would we believe anything she says? Because people hate women and they will actively. not care about all the victims in this scenario? They already don't. They don't. So they actually kind of like

that Jis Lane made victims of other women. Yeah. That's what I say. I think that the audience that is willing to accept lies from Jis Lane Maxwell considers her a man. But why? That's like they're like sex trafficking. That's a man's job. Good work.

Good work, lady. But it's... You really have a laborious to get that handled. Good work. It's a hard job wrangling up a woman. But, like, my thing is, why didn't she say this shit when she got arrested in the first place? Because she didn't have the opportunity to get pardoned. She wasn't going to, that wasn't being floated at the time.

She didn't have an administration in the fucking crosshairs like they are right now. She didn't have that. But you just say that Trump was there or someone else was there. No one will believe her. No one will believe her. But why believe her now? Understand that no one will believe her if she says that Trump was there. They will believe her if she says that everybody else was there, which is what they're looking for.

This is exactly what they're looking for. They're looking for her to say all of those things and they're going to partner and she's just going to be free. Yeah. And she's going to do it again. I do, but I don't know if she'll be able to do it again. Oh, no, they figure that out. You don't think she's going to go to fucking Turks and Kekos or like go to some fucking, she's going to go straight to some castle in England and there's going to be little girls in there rubbing fucking fucking prince Andrew's feet in like six weeks. It's going to fucking happen.

How is she going to build the good faith? Because she already had it. She's got all the connections. I'm talking. If you beat the rap, you beat that rap? Twice. Dude, you beat that rap? Look at fucking, what happened to, I mean, I know this is ridiculous.

Look at John Gotti. Yeah. Him beating those raps just made him stronger. Look at Donald Trump. Well, didn't he die in prison? Well, eventually. Eventually, sure. Look at Trump.

Every time they win, they get stronger. So he's like, if she gets pardoned, there's been no, there's no crimes, Eddie. All the crimes are gone. It's all erased. None of it happened. It's all gone. So that's the big conspiracy theory and that's going to happen. You think so? Yeah. I just don't think they're going to get away with that. The only way if their arrangement actually is going to go south, we're going to see a gray standing next to Trump with a fucking noose around its neck. That is what's going to happen. If that plan doesn't work, the next plan is there's going to be two people in gray costumes next.

to Trump. Yeah. Doing the first Zeta reticula, you know, golf course. All right. So we know that no matter what, she ain't going to roll on Trump because that's not going to help her. We know. We know.

Now, let me ask you this. If she rolls on some other people, people who were there, people who did do the crimes. Well, they need to have very, she has apparently two boxes of evidence that she brought into a private meeting with representatives from the DOJ. Why didn't we tick all of her shit when she went to prison? Because it's her stuff. It doesn't make any sense. She built it up over time.

Remember those John Wayne Gacy interviews I sent you to watch for fun? When you watch those things, you know he had that big evidence file? She can do all that from jail. Like she can print all that out within jail. And she's had nothing but time to sit and work on this gigantic file folder of information that she says that she has. That is ironclad. It's going to knock everybody out. Not like they have 100,000 pages.

of Epstein files inside of the White House right now that they have read that they specifically had orders to flag Trump's name in, that they had specific orders to cut around and to completely redact. So it's, you mean, that shit's gone. All that's gone. Now DOJ is coming out and saying, actually, we do have the video with the missing minute. We do have it. We're just, you know, they're just bad at lying. Yeah. You know what the crazy part is?

if she does roll on Clinton, we can't do anything about it. Fuck Clinton. But we can't do anything about it because of the laws that Trump put in place. Yep. It seems to really work out for everybody. It's almost like they're all on one team and nobody cares. Yeah, because they're friends. Yep, because they're all friends.

They're all friends. And we're just not friends with them. So remember that. Remember that. All right? So I'm going to be yelling out this to the rest of my fucking life. Aren't I? Yeah.

I'm never going to get past this. Yeah. It's so funny because we got there. That's why instead of reading the Epstein files... We were talking about aliens. That's why instead of reading the Epstein files, I'm reading this book called Joy. Ah, yes. Because you see, see how good wine my smile is?

I'm holding... But the way that person's stretching their leg, you can really get a good sniff of that ass. You're like, see? Honestly, I'm saying if a guy's smelling your butt, just legs. him finish. Now, should we be smelling our wives' butts more? I do smell them. I have. Really? Yeah. You get in there. You never just lay your head

on your wife's butt while she's laying on the couch or something? She doesn't lay on her stomach. You flip her over. I'm a lap man. I put my head on her lap. But now you've got a lot of colloidal silver and stuff in the pants. Oh, I like it when she like rubs my hair and like, oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean a touch on that. Yeah.

Oh, fuck you. I wear a hat to bed. All right, I want to talk about this. Yeah, I don't know. I'm sorry. We went for a MC. It's just hard because it's the, I'm just, you know, I'm, again, my father's funeral this weekend, so I read a lot about Jeffrey Epstein.

Yeah. It really fuels me. It's good. It's good. You got to channel that energy. Really fuels me. Here we go. We got this other, let's go, this is one last story.

This is a really fucked up story. All right, yeah. Oh, the, the, the Arkansas one? Yes. A man and a woman who had recently moved to Northwest Arkansas, they were... No one does that, by the way. Don't do that. They were brutally murdered on a hiking trail.

Clinton, David, Brink, 43, and Kristen, Amanda, Brink, 41, they had just moved into town. They were, they were hiking. And a man attacked them in a long-sleeved shirt and, like, he wasn't wearing a mask. He was a white dude. A smaller guy. Stabbed them brutally to death in front of their children. and their children ran to go to the park rangers. They stopped them.

They have, so, like, we don't know who the guy is. We don't know who did this. We don't, so we don't know why he did it. We don't know who they. They knew no one. They just moved into the neighborhood. They were avid hikers. They were brutally attacked.

No one knows whether or not it was staged or not. Or if it was planned ahead of time. Or if they were trying to kill the entire family because the kids escape. Well, who are the people? What do they do for a living? They were just, they just normal ass people. Like, no information. We don't know what he quite stabbed them with.

We know that they were just, they truly were just normal. They just moved there, I guess, because it was an affordable part. They'd move from Miles City, Montana. This is such a crazy, it's like barely being reported on. Well, it's because right now there is not a heck of a lot of information, but we have a very specific angle. So they were murdered in a place called Devil's Den. Now, Devil's Den State Park is also, for those of you that are big last podcast on the left listeners, No, for the fact that it is also the site of the alien abduction of Terry Lovelace.

Oh, we're back into aliens. We're right back into aliens. So all of this all happened at the same time. I'm not privy to this story. Can you give me a quick one? Terry Lovelace wrote a book called The Incident and Devil's Den. Now, this is the reason why it's so interesting is that it was in 1977. He was abducted by what he can only describe as two giant monkey people.

Okay. He said that he woke up in the middle of the night while he was camping to see four. gray, two-foot-tall monkeys, with large yellow eyes, long arms, and tails. After staring at him with broad grins for a while, they said, this is according to Terry, come play with us.

We'll have fun. So they spoke English? And we'll take you back home in just a little while. Yeah. There were monkeys. They were aliens. Oh. Now, but you know and believe the man.

But you know what are you going to do? You know what you're going to do? Yeah. So he went to go with his sister made fun of him from a serious. He was a young man. He said he hit her to the couch and he waited until she was on the phone. He was so freaked out. He made his sister wet her pants.

Well, that's cool. When Terry's father confronted him about this. Usually when I get scared, I wet my own pants. It's like that's just weird, but like it's osmosisely wet someone else's pants. I mean, that's what the butt sniffer's got to do. I just pissed your pants. Wow, yes. He did write this poem, that's right.

The nightmares returned. He had nightmares of big insect-like things that were in his words manipulating tools with long, thin fingers. Oh, yeah, he wrote a poem. Shadows from the hallway crept into my room. Long the monkey men, too, I assume. Never before in life had I seen a creature

that grinned before I could scream. A candle's flame dances before it grows dim. One monkey man's shadow had slowly crept in. On his knees and with ease, he is perched on the edge of my bed, if you please. The silence was broken one inch for my ear, as the monkey man whispered, My boy, I'm right here. So that's the thing.

I don't know whether or not this guy's one of the monkey men. We don't know, and we might not ever know. So back to the couple that was killed. Oh, you want to talk about the real story? The real story. Oh, sure. They do have a person of interest. They have a picture of them.

They do. Yeah, this guy. It's his back, unfortunately. Whoa. This is the guy. It's a white dude. Here's the, here's the sketch of his face. Whoa.

He looks like a regular ass-looking white dude. He looks like fucking Gary Sinise. Yeah. And, oh, my God, where's Gary Sedice? Oh, my God. Carrie Sinise, where does he live? I mean, the real crime is he's wearing fingerless gloves. Oh, wow.

Yeah. How do you? Wow, you know, what's weird is that when you typed in, where does Gary, he immediately auto-corrected. to where does Gary a Seney's love? Oh, really? Yeah, Calabasas. So lots of people are asking.

Calabasas, California. I bet he does well in Calabasas. That seems like the right town for him. He seems like a nice man. I bet he's wonderful. He does a lot for soldiers. I can't believe he's got to, I couldn't believe when I saw him he has legs. Can't believe it.

It was wearing tall green socks, though. So we knew that he was ready for action. If he ever had to be Lieutenant Dan. You know, two seconds, a computer make my legs disappear. Yeah, give me two seconds. seconds. I'll do it with an axe. Oh, yeah. Yeah, so this is the story. This is all we know so far. It is a very haunting story. It's really fucked up because they just were just straight up thrill killed.

And no one should be thrill killed while hiking. If I'm going to get thrill killed, I hope I'm at the dentist. Why does it never happen there? I mean, there's too many other people there. I mean, that's the guy in the middle of the woods. You're going to thrill kill someone. You kill them in the woods. Well, did you see the story about the guy who stabbed like 10 people in a Walmart? Yes. That's a fucked up. story, and he didn't wait to be in fucking private. Everyone lived.

Whoa, he just stabbed a bunch of people in wheelchairs. That's too easy. Yeah, come on, bro. You know, dude, you got to be careful with that, man. If I was in a wheelchair, too, I'd be fucking, I'm, why are there no souped up wheelchairs? There are? No, like, why is there no? Like, straight up, like, high-level escalade versions of wheelchairs.

I mean, I get the, I bet there is. I've looked this up many times and I've seen nothing I want a full on body armor capable set up I want to be able to get up to 45 miles per hour multiple mediums of things I want to be able to go through

like highway to street to mud I mean look at these look at this one right there this one's got some treads on it I've seen the treads yeah our buddy Jason's got the treads he's got the treads yeah but this one's cool he put some flames on the side of it

but he didn't like the treads but why isn't not the rest of it's not more souped up Why isn't there ones with more like temperature control, like more like stuff like that. Like you can put like you can temperature control. You got to put a roof on it. That'd be cool. Why are there no more mini chairs with roofs on them like little cubes? I mean, that should be cool.

I mean, look at this one. That's nice. See, that's fucking awesome. Yeah, that's a classic. Oh, yeah, that's fancy. These are nice. Who's doing that? Oh, that's Ferrari.

Wow. Do you have to buy a Ferrari wheelchair first, though? Is it one of those where you have to get like four or five wheelchairs? I think these are just AI imagination. Unfortunately, I'm sorry. Get that out of here. Man, what the fuck? Why isn't that happening, though?

That should be a thing. I got to tell you this, Henry. You're not going to like to hear it. People don't like the handicapped. People don't like want to help them. We love the handicapped. We love the handicapped. Yes, because they're human beings.

But I think there is a whole, the world does not like people who are disabled. I just feel like we're leaving money on the table here. That we are. I feel like there's a way to upsell anybody. Do I smell the last podcast on the left wheelchair? Oh my God. Coming to the merch page? Last podcast on the left

collabs with Miata. Yeah. To make a scream chair. Oh, the scream chair! You'll scream your way all the way to the doctor's office. Oh, yeah! You're going to be... Oh, I've ever wanted to get to the local wheelchair tire place

under seven minutes? Man, I remember my grandfather there's rascal. He could really get that thing up, dude. He could really get that thing cooking. He would bring it over drawbridges and shit. He took it on like real roads. I love that. That's what I'm saying. Give it some cover. Give it like some enclosure. Let's get this thing up to 55. Yeah. Oh, yeah. No, but you can really, you can already get the ones at work, you know, pretty good. You can take those places. Higher. I want to also, where's my, where's my wario chair? Where's my fucking Eggman chair? That flies. Where's my hover chair?

We don't have hover cars. Why can't they have hovered? I guess you start with chairs. How easy would it be is just one guy? Yeah. Flop them up there. You're right. And then if you're using a wheelchair, your legs are not going to weigh as much as your top. It's not like me or I'm thick all the way through.

Well, you know, you're not thick all the way through. I'm just saying in terms of like you can get it up there easier, right? You're right. I think we can get you up there. Side stories L-P-O-T-L-G-Mil.com. Where's our hover chairs? Yeah, where are the hover chairs, folks? Look at that guy.

He's standing on a drone. That's not a hover chair. Standing. That's fucking... Kind of robot-nicky, though, I think... Dude, but you're looking... That's green goblin-like. But also, you're looking at him

flying around, and he had a guy who's capable enough to stand. He should be sitting. You know, if Stephen Hawking didn't have a special... Too special of a chair. I just think because he was... He didn't want to brag. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, I think he was humble. Yeah. It's one thing I know about Stephen Hawking. Very humble. He's humble. I just think that he wasn't ready for... Whoa, that's awesome. Is he really sitting on that drone?

Looks like it? Awesome. That's what I want. Whoa, he's sitting on it like it's a toboggin. Yeah. That's awesome. That's cool. That's like a motorcycle drone.

I want to fucking, I just want to terrorize people for good. You can. Go to the Barnes & Noble. Sniff some butts. Oh, no. I don't want to sniff. Now we know it's a crime. Yeah.

I dare you to sniff my fucking dick. Yeah, you don't got that fuck. Everyone's just like, all right. I'll sniff your cock. All right. Sure. Okay. I'll sniff your fucking dick.

All right, let's get some... Smells like pussy. Yeah. Live from your play. Let's get some listener emails. Now, we're going to keep... We have a new stinger, obviously. We've been trying to do new stingers,

but we like the one last week from so much. We're just going to replay. We're going to play it again? All right. Woo! Yes. Listener. Email time.

With Ed and Henry, and favorite guys. But ghosts and got them to kill her dreams. I'm a good sense. Wow. It's sad stories. Listen to the email. Damn.

Yeah. Fuck. Yeah. Wow. God damn. I want to hear some emails. So good. I wish the emails are as good as the stinger.

Now, I will say... Yeah, right. The dude who wrote that song? Who's that guy? That's Dakota Rolf. Write some emails. Yeah. Because you're so good at this.

So good. Yeah, let's see some emails. I would like to first say, I'll say this truly, if you're looking to have your father be buried on a weekend, have him be buried on the same weekend that a legendary dad rock man has also died. Because having my father go into the ground at the same time as Ozzy Osbourne's death was such a great moment for me in terms of music. Because it was just so amazing to look and rock,

no more tears on the way to the fucking funeral, dude. Because I'll see you I'll see you on the other side Dude see it no more tears Like I mean it's sucked up It made me feel strong about death Yeah So first thing I got here is Wales

Whaling Japan right Um everyone's saying it's not good Yeah So pretty much everybody have said they have Eddie was right to defend To fight against it Everyone's basically said So because I was really nervous

About how hard I came for the Japanese I was like oh no Am I going to get killed for this? No, mostly people understand that it's an antiquated historical tradition that they do in Japan. There's a lot of people, I found it interesting. They said people, like, if you work in Japanese businesses, they found that people were getting disappointed because one of the big things that they, I guess they would do for, like, one of traditional ways to celebrate somebody who's retiring is to take them to a whale meat restaurant. like that's like a very traditional celebration and that now that they're closing most of the whale meat restaurants

whale meat gets you sick but the thing is everyone's just saying too it's like it's not even just that it's gross is that whale meat's just really gross but it's like considered a traditional celebratory meal so people get upset when these restaurants are getting closed but it's also no one's eating there because the food's gross the food looks horrible whale meat looks disgusting We're not supposed to eat it.

No, it's just not for us. It's just... It's just... Bad for us. It's just, I know... It's a head big. It is just a very much a... It's a tradition there that hopefully one day will stop, but it's just hard because it's

connected to their national identity and they don't want to get rid of it, but it seems to be... Why is their national identity getting sick? It's because there's certain old ways things that their country... It's like, because, like, you know, the imperial family is still, like, vaguely important in Japan. Certain things like that where they've already, in their view, succumbed to the West enough. So they don't want to erase many of their traditional things. But it just feels like this one could probably go. It's just like you're like clearly wrong here.

It's just, they just are, it's a political thing. They bring it up in election cycles, apparently. This is like their version of, like, I don't know if this is a fair equation, but it seems to be. Are you going to say abortion? No. No, no, to like, daylight savings time. Okay. You know how like every election cycle, somebody, one of the candidate says,

and I'll get rid of daylight saving time. And they just never do it. Yeah. Because Benjamin Franklin came up with it. No one wants to fuck with them. Oh. That's like kind of what it is. Man.

So what are they going to do? So no one's going to fucking get rid of the whale meat killing? Nope. It just seems like. Continuing on. It's just going to go bad. Yep. No one wants to buy it.

Nothing changes. There's, it is just what they are going to do. And that's, and we can't stop, Eddie. But I know that they got the restaurants and stuff like that, but what about the non-discriminate killing? The ones that's just done for fucking the calling for no reason. And they just leave the bodies there. That's a part of their historical tradition. And it just, someone is going to have to change it one day.

One day, there will have to be a big enough mandate within the country that it changes, which just seems to be getting there. So we'll see. Donate to Sea Shepherd. Fuck these motherfuckers. You know, that's just don't... Do you think that's why they killed the prime minister? Yes. Do you think it was a whale?

Yep. I would also just say, just, you know, when you go to Japan, don't eat it. Certainly. I really want to go to Japan. I was offered it in Iceland. Whale? Yeah. Really?

Yeah. It looked gross, so I didn't eat it. Yeah, they just stopped doing it over there, commercial whale fishing in Iceland. But it's still around. You didn't bring that up to me. But the meat's around. I know, but when we were in Iceland together, you didn't be like, hey, yeah, there's a whale restaurant over there.

I'm surprised you didn't think I would want to eat it It's because truly because of everything I had read about it That it was so fucking gross Yeah That it's like there's no point in both feeling bad And it having it being Disgusting

What was the new animal we ate there that we loved? Reindeer Yes If I could I have no love for a reindeer If I could I would kill and eat Every reindeer that I saw And I've eaten now

And it's funny is that Now I've eaten American reindeer Or like I've had it in America the Iceland reindeer is so specifically good it's got like fatteness in it it's so fucking tasty dissolved in my mouth

I hope that Santa's got to take a cab next year I want to eat every one of them I don't want I want there to be nothing but antlers laugh I want to be shits and blitzin yep I want to be I want to do

I don't want to just spray my ass but I don't want to just spray my toilet with Comet, the cleaning stuff. That's right. I want to do it with Comet himself. Now, got a lot of responses about bosses with guns. Oh, I'm very interested in this. Is there any good ones? I love these.

When I was 19 years old, they set a new job at a local concrete construction company. Since I'm new and paired up with one of my fellow employees, a no teeth having good old boy. My job is to pretty much do whatever he says, follow him around. out and help him out. Great job. Oh, yeah. One day I show up to work and no-teeth co-worker asks me how I feel about killing

cats. I politely let him know I'm not a fan. He takes him to his truck, pulls out a revolver, two glocks, two ARs, and tells me the task today is to kill the stray cats hanging around the shop. I convince him to not kill the cats. He takes me into the woods

and we shoot trees instead. I end up trapping. Was that part of the job? On the clock? Hey, I ended up trapping all the cats and dropping them off at a local dump sites around the county. So to answer your question, where does your boss keep the guns in the back of the truck covered with a blanket? See, that's the thing is that I love this guy

because he also just wanted to shoot the guns. He was dissuaded from killing by just being like, well, can't literally shoot the guns? And they're like, yes. So we're seeing some of the solution right there. We're seeing some of it right there. And he said, same dude once had a porn titled, Cleaning My Cunt, play over his car, Bluetooth,

tooth while I was in the car with him. Oh. Interesting. Cleaning my cunt is not, that's a heck. I mean, if you're calling it your cunt, probably needs to be cleaned. Hey. Or you need to have some respect for yourself. Yeah.

So someone here just says, I also got some pushback about Dan Marino. Oh, of course. People, you know, there's jet fans out there. There are a lot of people saying, one, someone saying that this is honestly one of the crueler terms I've seen, which is Dan Marino is not the greatest quarterback of all time. He'd an unreal stat patting stretch from 84 through 88. Yeah, it was unbelievable. He was the best,

it was one of the best runs of someone could have. But they view it as a fluke after 1986. He never threw for more than 30 touchdowns in the season after 85. You only won the division twice. Sounds to give a balanced team. You only had seasons with the completion percentage above 60% five times. What's wrong with that? Does this change it at all? Oh, yeah!

This was to be the year. Dan Marino, 11-year veteran quarterback, was to surpass 290 career touchdowns. 3,200 completions and 40,000 passing yards. Well, maybe next year. But you can't keep this guy out of the game. No shit. He did a Blockbuster commercial.

No wonder he thought yet. Blockbuster. Can I please play now done? Sorry, I just went into overtime. Stay in the game with Blockbuster. And set some records of your own. Wow. So he did a Blockbuster commercial.

That's very interesting. He works for them. Wow, he did. He works there. So of course he thought he could skip the line. But people also got... You worked there. If you're doing the commercial, what's the point?

That's a perk. He probably shouldn't even had to go to the store. They should have invented Netflix for him back then, so he could have called the store, and they brought it to his house. All I know is I got an email for someone who worked at Borders, and they said, Richard Dreyfus always waited online. Yeah, and look where Borders is now.

Wow. You know, a lot of people say they want open borders, but we all know that Barnes & Noble is doing a five, job. Rich Dreyfus, a professional and known crank. Even he waited online. Yeah, it's because he needed something to bitch about. No, but that's, you know, but, you know, that's what I'm saying. A lot of people resonated with me, saying celebrities should let the power of their

magnanimity be shown. Yeah. And I'm saying Dan Marino is a god. He's not a celebrity. This is called... You help him. You give him. It's called toxic fandom. It's not toxic fandom. No, it's practical. He doesn't care what San Marino's done. If Dan Marino would have stayed in that store any longer, a fucking crowd would have formed, and the whole thing would have shut down. They wouldn't have rented any videos.

It would have become a big autograph signing. We'll see. It didn't sound like it was, though, Eddie. But this is not the last. I'm just hoping that Dan Marino maybe can come on the show. Oh, my God. And clear this up. I would love it.

Because right now, as far as I'm concerned, he's a villain and he needs to be canceled. He's not a villain. He's a hero. I think he's a villain and needs to be canceled. What are you talking about? You can't cancel Dan Marino. Line Gates. line gate is coming line gate is starting now line gate line gate is starting right now

hashtag he should have had a I'll tell you the real line gate he didn't have a good enough offensive line for the second half of his career laces out Dan that's right laces out the man is in one of their most popular videos I'm just saying let him skip the line you know much money blockbuster made off Ace Ventura Dan Marino personally rented it like 20 times Dan Marino has the, right now, he has the room to break his silence. What do you mean break his silence? He doesn't have to do anything. It's time for...

Dan, if you want to come by, I'd love to have you by it. Right now, to me, the silence is deafening. Yeah? And I think that the silence, the only thing less, more deafening is the roar of the crowd. I'm just saying, silence is deafening, break the silence so we can hear something. I mean, I don't even know. I'm happy he cut the line. How many people break?

I'm so sick of the term break silence. It makes me so fucking deeply pissed off. Silence is deafening as aggravating. It makes me using it when I want to piss people off. Me same. That's why I did it to you. Your silence is deafening. Yes.

But Dan Marino's not silent. He's a commentator. No, I know. It used to be. Yeah, I think. DM him and tell him to come on last podcast in the last. He is DM. Dude, DM him.

You can't DM the DM, man? Mark, can you, here, lift up. Can you open up your phone right now and DM him? I didn't bring my phone with it I don't bring my phone well let me see I don't think he's on Instagram yeah yeah yeah man

Dan 13 Marino am I not following Dan Marino are you not following Dan Marino he's got his business inquiries on here should I oh yeah yeah we should ask him about how he how he is reacting

I am following Dan Marino we should ask him how he's reacting to the current rise of allegations of his improper behavior in the 90s no just say that

no just started with that Do not. No, we do not. How do you respond to accusations against you? Allegations. There is no allegations of improper behavior. There are no allegations. He was acting the way he should.

I'm just saying don't tell him what for. Just say gations of activities in the 90s. Wow. Henry, you have more followers than Dan Marino. Yeah, I do. Wow. Yeah, I do. That's fucked up.

Do yourself followers? Kidding. You have more Instagram followers than Dan Marino. Reno. It's pretty cool. See, why aren't you nervous with me? He's verified. He's verified. Seriously, though, if we hit him with the gations, I bet you we get our email back. All right, I'm unfollowing you, Henry.

You can't unfollow me. I just did. No, we got to follow me back. No, I can't follow you back. Why? I just unfollowed you. Have somebody else to follow me? No. No. You're insulting me. I'm saying that now, I don't want to hear, I don't want to know your information. You know, you watch me put a fucking basket of my father's junk in a fucking grass.

All right, I've followed you back. Thank you. Now you're unfollowed. All right, maybe I'll just restrict you. Yeah, restrict me. Restrict me. But listen, you'll never, you'll never see a PR guy hit you faster if you hit him with that Gation's word, man. No.

And that's how we start booking. All right, first of all. That's what we should have did with Ariaster. He did Mark Merrin, though, guys. We got to start doing that. I saw he did Mark Merritt. We got to start doing them. Mark Barrett doesn't even have a show anymore.

Yeah, Mark. He's like, I quit. And then he's got like three months of shows. Yep. You didn't quit. No. He's still got new episodes coming out. He's a fucking liar.

That's why every day, man, I get out there and I live knowing that I expose liars. I expose every day with the lamplight of truth. And we all love the fact that I'm the fucking strongest man and the goddamn continental United States or American. I'm the only person willing to stay up. to the current fucking administration and also stick up for sniffers everywhere, okay? And I'm

going to laugh at the fact that everyone's going to be angry in me. All right, because... We didn't stick up for the sniffer. We didn't. You just did though. No, but that I mean to. You fucking piece of shit. The way you talk about Dan Marino in front of me is gross. I want you to understand that what I've decided to do

is much like Batman who understood that it's more than just being Bruce Wayne in a costume that he's a symbol. Yeah. That's me. This guy's sitting here talking. We're working at borders. Too real is bigger than Henry Zabrowski. I don't give a shit about Richard Dreyfus.

People, some people do. Jaws is your favorite film. I love Jaws. And you know what? If I was working somewhere and Richard Dreyfus was standing there, I'd be like, hey, Richard, would you like to cut the line? You can cut the entire line. That's what should Dan Marino should have waited for.

Oh. That's what I'm saying. Using my words against me. Dan Marino shouldn't have to. wait for it. He just walks up to the front. You take care of him and you move on. He's busy. Yeah, he just with what? His family. He's over now. It's over. His family's dead. His family's

not dead. I mean, they're older. He has extra family that's appearing out of nowhere. He has a child out of wetlock. He's got places to be. What happens would you make wedlock, wetlock? Oh, is it wedlock? Yeah. It's not wet lock?

What does wedlock even mean? You know, I was wet lock? Yeah. It means being married. It means being married. Wet lock? Out of wet lock means having a baby or having sex outside of marriage.

Oh. I thought he just like slipped into someone's vagina because it was wet. That's having a baby out of the wet lock and into the, I'm out of the wet lock and into the, it would be out of the dry lock and into the wet lock. That's where, yeah, that's a good idea. Wet lock is joint jointing center. Oh, by the way, this came from a Viking. fan. This means nothing.

This means absolutely not. Vikings, they're just mad because they tried the court Damarino when he retired. They wanted him to be a Viking and he's like, nah, I'm not going to fucking move to Minnesota. And the Vikings so widely also hired Britt Farv after the scandal. Yeah. You know, I know. But Eddie, I... Vikings are rapists.

I think it's really... I guess dolphins are too. Wow. I really think that it's funny that people have named us as like... references in their like college thesis of like PhD programs that's disgusting

it's got patreon.com slash last podcast on the left to watch us do this the right way the old school way go back to that no yeah he's enjoying that television program he's just looking at pictures of Dan Marino's

Instagram account just do this on your phone you can do this on a light I like it on the big screen no do this on your way home On your way home. Oh, there he is with the goose. Wow, big guy. Yeah, we lost a great one. Go to NLP on the left.

For all the social bullshit. Go and see our new YouTube channels. Oh, Jesus, Henry. That LPN TV, someplace underneath. Elpian Romantasy. On the Foreign Report, you want to go check it out wherever you can get to YouTube. It's on YouTube. Yeah, you're dying.

Yep. Come and see us live. Henry and I got some shows coming up. On September 21st, we're going to be in Kansas City, Missouri at the Truman. On Friday, October 24th, Redway, California at the Mateel Community Center, I'm telling you, if you're ever going to travel for a show, that's the one. The Redwoods are beautiful, and if you are a fan of marijuana, it might be at that show. Yeah, it's going to be awesome, and you can experience joy firsthand.

Now, who is Joy? Some bitch. That's right. Sunday, November 30th, Columbus, Ohio. we're going to be at the Newport Music Hall and of course, please come to my show Dead Men Tell Some Tales A dark dive into Disney history

That's going to be at the Elysian theater On August 21st And go watch him get strict from the allowable List person list Oh my god If they don't let me into Disney anymore Because of this show I'm coming to Dan Marino's house

Yeah That's gonna be my new Disneyland Oh okay I thought you were to like kill him or something No I'm gonna hang out Dan Marino he's on his way I'm going to ride his ride. So if you don't want to break your silence about the allegations against you. We're buddies.

We're going to see what happens, Dan Marino. He's signed a personal autograph for me. I know he remembers. I snuck under the thing. If he doesn't remember, he has other children, he'll definitely remember you. I think he remembered the other children. Yeah. I just wasn't until the game crawling, looking for that, not Super Bowl money.

Yeah, for first of it, his contract was Super Bowl contract. That's a big old contract. By the way, this one person here, I really got to talk to them. They said, in their email here, it says, Ed has never seen the Dolphins win a Super Bowl. He's like, here are some facts. And Ed has never seen the Dolphins win a Super Bowl. His fondest memories of a Dolphins, as a Dolphins fan, are his parents' generation fondly reminiscing about the 70. Those aren't my fondest memories.

I don't care about the greatest team that ever played football. I think we're going to have to wrap it up. You know, I know. My fondness memories are watching Dan Marino fake spike against the Jets and then winning in the last second. That's one of my fondest memories. And also

John Alfordall no one's coming for him. He's really the greatest dolphin. So anyway, what are we doing? We all know for a fact the greatest dolphin was Flipper. Thank you everyone. We're going to see you next week. Flipper wasn't even his fucking name. Hail Satan. He committed suicide in my birthday.

That's right. Hail Day Marino every day for the rest of my life. Fucking assholes. I get sick of this shit. You wish. I have a book for you, Eddie. Joy. Every contracted muscle, every frozen area of the body holds impulses of anger that is fundamentally the aggression needed to restore the integrity of freedom. This is bullshit. Fuck you! I love you, Dad. And I'll always. see you home.