Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: The Chicago Scrambler

Episode Date: September 1, 2021

Ben 'n' Henry break down this week's true crime news: drive-by eggings in Chicago, a woman has an affair with a chimpanzee, a man takes a stolen mortuary van on a joyride, and MUCH MORE.Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0

There's no place to escape to. This is the last time on the left side stories On the road again, I can't believe we're on the road again. It was wonderful, wasn't it? It's so good to be out there, eat shitty hotel food, get liquid shits, having fun We went to a limo. It made Marcus's tummy hurt. He couldn't handle the class, but we had a good time We loved it. We're trashy classy people. What was fun about writing a limo from Columbus, Ohio Down to Cincinnati, Ohio was all of the first of all Bengals fans were amazed. They were amazed. There was a Kindful to put two older couple full Bengals here. Both of them more like Bengals. Whoa, buddy Got you, but they were like pointing at the limo like

Ariana Grande. Look at that. I bet it's Ariana Grande in there. Ariana Grande also There's a motorcyclist who was pretty impressed with our limo. Oh, yeah, we were in pretty impressed with his ride Oh, yeah, and then you could have had a real hot action scene And then when we get out of that limo, which I think is really funny Is that it shows the democratic nature of money in this whole world Well, we got out of this limo and you saw everybody that saw us come out of the limo Just be like wow anybody can get a limo. I thought you had to be famous to have one looks like Mumford ate his son Isn't that wonderful? Welcome to side stories everyone. I am Ben hanging out with Henry

Yep, we had such a wonderful time this past weekend. Thanks to everyone who came out to the shows in Detroit Columbus and a beautiful Cincinnati. We did take a limo and it was so comical at the end of our trip the limo Driver's like should I pull into the hotel and we're like sure Yeah, do whatever man. So he knocks over a cone on the way in and he gets into this really It's a roundabout right and then so we're checking in and then I get a text from Henry be like limo driver stuck in the Doing like a 1200 point turn trying to get out of the roundabout It was incredible. It just shows man the power of the limo because everyone just watch it No one could park no

He took over the entire valet section people are honking at him and shit I just seen a bunch of just irate Cincinnati 50 year old couples It's kind of like it's like gasoline for my soul. It was wonderful, but thank you truly to everyone who came out We hope you enjoyed the show and we just had a wonderful time. All right We have a bunch of news to get to this week. Let's start with a bit of we have two updates We do one update. Um, dare I say sometimes the law finds a way I mean, there's a difference between what's legal and what's right. Absolutely correct, Michigan parents Man their kid he was staying at home. He was 30 years old

He got to get the heck out of there. Oh, yeah His parents thought they had a way to get him out by throwing away his $30,000 porn collection Now we know it's their $30,000 porn collection because that's what a judge gave him in awards His parents have to pay him $30,000 for giving for throwing out his vintage porn. Mm-hmm. David working. He is 43 actually won the lawsuit against his parents 43 years 43. Yes. He lived at their Grand Haven. There's no winners. I'm not no winners whatsoever working lived at their Grand Haven home his parents for 10 months after a divorce. I wonder what Ripped them apart. I mean one page at a time

I don't know. I don't know literally the end of a marriage with a million paper cuts But why is full of boobies? Why would porn end your relationship? I guess having honey I've got to go down to the basement again, and then she's just up there lonely and sad looking at Gerard Butler films Just wondering what else she could have had as opposed to a come Basted husband who is looking at old porno. This is the thing. He's either constantly masturbating and it's ruined their sex life Or David working this man. He better be working to afford all of this shit David working it might be one of those I guess that's why that he went balls to the wall in court because he said it was vintage

That this was his collection. He wouldn't sully That porn collection by doing such as something as low as masturbating to it. Well, it was his Americana Traveling through America. That was his that was his tribute to middle America Well, I think you could look at a the lens of history through pornography. I don't see that as not an insightful Angle, I think there could be something absolutely in David workings to his credit You must like pubes. He really must because back in the day. Whoo, it's a jungle out there. Absolutely, and I am propube I like to see a pub. I don't know why all of these women have to look like turkeys on Thanksgiving I like women with whatever they want. Absolutely another good point. Henry Zabrowski hashtag woke hashtag

Too cool David workings parents Yeah, they threw out the porno because they figured maybe that was why he got a divorce and the more than I hear about the story because I was under the Assumption that he was kind of living with him for an elongated period of time guys going through a divorce He is he already lost his wife and because she didn't want the porn collection in the divorce That's one of those great things about having stuff your significant other hates. Yes, unless they take it in pure spite Which could also happen for certain So ten months

I think his parents they need to be a little bit more sympathetic to their loser son who couldn't keep the marriage together and for them to Throw away the porno collection. I'm actually in favor of what the judge did here It's kicking a man while he's down but the definition of it and it's kicking him in the crotch because those are his not just those are in his papers It's his memories. Those are his memories. Those are his friends. I remember what I jerked off to this magazine. It was December 1998 that's the Barbie twins perhaps or something to do with Jennifer McCarthy Yeah, holy shit. Yeah, wow now that I think of it. These are wonderful memories. Absolutely. They are wonderful memories So working's parents also must pay the

14,500 damn your 15 grand to their son's attorney So this was a $45,000 lesson that they thought they were teaching their son seriously But sometimes doesn't the student become the teacher and in this case the son is indeed the victor So, oh, yeah, so this is all there's a little bit more And the more of the context of the the original fight was this is what I forgot about this The son was living with them after his divorce one day They got into an argument about shit and then the police were actually called so you remember that they actually had kind of a Very heated relationship the police advised him to not come back to the property

That is when he went he moved to Indiana So he moved out right and that's when they he left all of his shit at the house And that's when the parents really went through everything and this is about spite. This is psychological warfare. I completely agree And I'm on the side of the child who is 46 and porn addicted I remember the dad said or don't remember I'm recalling here the dad said in an email frankly David I did you a big favor getting rid of all this stuff and it's like you didn't because you cost him a lot of money Also, who'd you give it to? Yeah, what happened is some garbage out Yeah, but then yeah, you know who finds it then the little rascals and the little rascals go and then they jerk off all over town

It's better than crime crimes and you think that is a crime. No. No, oh my god Henry, public masturbation is a crime. Public masturbation is a masturbation. Sure sure sure sure, but it's better than I don't know Surrounding me in a group and taking everything that I have in my pockets or like or all beat me with their skateboards Surrounding my cars when I can't get out of the parking lot and all of a sudden I have to kill these children Those are your personal stories now imagine all of them doing that plus one jerk it off. I Mean at least I'd be like that's love Yeah, I guess so. All right, so that's an update the Michigan parents They've lost the war against porn and their son

You can well, he's never gonna get it back. Is he no, he's not he's gonna have to make new memories Unless he goes and he starts digging in trash cans and now all of a sudden they've made their son the guy who digs through Trash cans for looking for his old pornography. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I just Oh, well worst Easter Bunny of all time. I tell you what Thanksgiving is gonna suck I don't think that Thanksgiving isn't happening this year because what he was thankful for was his $30,000 worth of porn And now he doesn't even have that well I will also say a big shout out to all of our friend to all of our friends and all of our listeners who work in the porn industry one thing That is fun about porn is that porn is the reason why we have blu-ray and not HD DVD

They are they've always been the head of the curve of all technology They were the first people doing the immersive cell phone What what do you call that when you they are like the VR and there'll be probably the first ones to Originate robots that could first suck your dick and then eventually drive your car Well, be careful with the VR don't get sucked in too much. I'll never get out Yeah, oh, but they don't worry soon. We'll be able to go to the office in a helmet. Do you see that thing that fucking? Zuckerberg put out. Oh, yes, like this idea of the virtual office. Fuck you, bro Yeah, buddy, we just got out of the office. He's like, but what if we bring the office to your mind?

It's like the last place that the office should be able to get to the usually you'd be like that's how I was when I had An office job you got my body. Yes, you're not gonna get my soul. Definitely not now They want both also we talked about this on abling and stop at thank you for supporting that show by the way We went twice a week and we're beating a lot of schmucks But we talked about the only fan situation and because everyone screamed on our shows and many others It worked and only fans is now not eliminating the only content that people go to their platform for Which is wonderful adult sex work So thank you for everyone in our community who made only fans change their

Disgusting decision to ban the thing that made them successful. So today finger your butthole For yourself and there's another update. So Chad day bells kids If you remember Chad day bell was the preacher who worked with Laurie Valo the his hotter half in order to kill Many people around them their children and Chad day bells former wife as well And as far as cycle couples go They're kind of a 10, you know, Laurie Valo is well, Laurie Valo is an Iowa 10. Yes, but not the rest of it Chad day bells of he looks like Winnie the Pooh without the personality When he was just sad really

We have tiny dick Chad day bell his children are saying he was framed and there's no way He could have done this. You know, what's so funny about this when children defend their parents I'm like, okay, well their head. They must have done something. Well, but like you're so fucked up You grew up with this man. This man was a completely different person Up until he met Laurie Valo and then I mean he was already doing his like he was never fucking innocent He was always a liar He was always saying that he was a prophet and talking about the end times and doing all of this shit Like he was a dangerous person. He was trying to be he owned a podcast network

It's not good But isn't it nice that his children are standing by him? I'm gonna remind you when Rudy Giuliani who is like I might run for president or for governor and his kids are like He was the worst father we've ever had. We've never voted for him one time I'm like, oh, he's a scumbag piece of shit as another indication of him being a scumbag piece of shit But the fact that kids are standing by him and not being like he openly molested me Is actually kind of like a redeeming. I'm finding redemption. They're in on it And those five kids also were a part of the same death cult that they all were so like those five kids

Want his their father to be correct. They want him to be right. Are you telling me they want his life? They want his life. Wow I'm like the almost the biblical statement. I don't want your life James Vanderbake Um, no, but yes, and now there's also some saying there's apparently a little bit of leak of information that they believe That chad debil's wife who also died of a mysterious illness. Yes, some kind of poisonous poison scenario Uh, she was asphyxiated. So we don't know what the hell is happening here again. We're just finding that out. Yes, we are Asphyxiation Isn't that a fairly easy thing for a for a coroner to be like, yeah, the the throat's all choked in

It can't just know that fairly easily. They're trying to figure out now I think that I think that the police held back a lot of specifics about the nature of the way these bodies were found And what happened because they were starting to understand that all of these cases were linked And they were that something was happening within the chad debil lori valo universe So maybe they wanted to eliminate people being like I did it because I'm cool and it's like did you choke her? No, I did not like no, you didn't do it then. Did you people like lori valo's brother claiming he did it You don't mean like that kind of shit like because he was ready to do everything He was ready to do anything. He was here for fucking doledger man. I gotta say

if rachel dolezal had one amount one percent of the amount of Convincing attitude of these two we would all she'd still be black like I don't Don't understand and this is I think for all of us. It's a little bit confusing when you look at colton hindsight You're like, how did you follow keith ranieri again? He played volleyball all bad and was short and nerdy He makes you feel good exactly They must have really done a number on these people for them to have support like that Going further is the investigation goes further. The evidence seems to be coming out. It's not looking good But they're standing by their cult leader

I feel like there's so you give up a lot and honestly where they're from to from salt lake city to iowa and all this place There's not a lot of shit to do I think it's also why people get in a methamphetamine in their 40s. Of course it adds spice It adds drama every time I drive from la to phoenix halfway through I kind of want to do some math. There's nothing. It's a sandy desert. It adds flavor You look out and you see like the four and not a diss on trailer parks wherever you live It's just fine, but you see four trailer homes and you're like, what could you possibly do other than math? I mean, there's no other option. There's nothing it's instant paprika

Oh, who doesn't like to be a little who doesn't like to be a little corn at a state fair I like it. Um, this is a story that's I mean, I think it's an important story for us to tell You want to do something serious? You want to do something a little bit lighter? I don't know if if you'd say this is serious or light because when it comes down to it We've talked about these types of relationships on the show. Sure. Yes, we have and again like Haha, maybe we're missing something Um, this is this comes from belgium. Oh a belgium woman spanned from the zoo after a quote-unquote four-year affair with a chimpanzee

Now she has been banned from coming in in contact with this is chimpanzee Um, I believe the chimpanzee was named like something about cheetah named cheetah So this woman came every day for for four years. So chimpanzee named cheetah arrived at the Antwerp zoo 30 years ago Now over the past four years 80 timmermans has visited the primate every single week And according to Amy Timmermans, this is her quote. I love that animal and he loves me I haven't got anything else. Why do they want to take that away? We're having an affair. I'll just say all right the chimpanzee cheetah ch i t a not cheetah like a fun adult entertainment club Is a 38 year old chimpanzee. So it's an old chimpanzee and those are the most dangerous chimps

Well, they're also the most wise. We are very close to the chimps. No, they're the ones that flip out They can flip out if she leaves him. She needs to walk a tight line Obviously she enjoys a stern relationship. She does now this is the this quote unquote affair The way it went down was that timmermans that she'd go to the outside of the cage and she'd wave and blow kisses at the monkey And then the chimp would I guess blow kisses back. I'm not certain But I think he's just like assuming like she's gonna bring me food or I'm gonna eat her tits They just felt like it was getting um, they felt that it was starting to negatively impact the cheetah And cheetahs were poor with the uh zoo's other chimpanzees

Well, that's not a jealousy and you know what if your friends can't deal with the fact that you're happy and you're in love Then they weren't your real friends to begin with and they're trying to bring you down So cheetah you don't need those other monkeys when everyone's human. Absolutely. Yeah, because according to um, according to the zoo Uh, the antwerp zoo according to uh, sarah lafoot Well, because it's interesting because so cheetah they said when cheetahs like too involved with the visitors The monkeys begin to ignore him and they don't consider him a part of the group That's what she says And so what that does is that that makes the champ kind of like an outlier and it can't get back into the tribe

Yeah, according to lafoot. She says an animal that is too focused on humans is less respected by its peers But again peers Maybe you need to open your minds and realize your buddy is banging inter Uh species do you think that you would be like that? Do you think that they wouldn't be like what do you think that within the chimp world?

They wouldn't be like that like when like mary k latorno had sex with her student like would they be like No, because we're talking it's already weren't that's taboo. No because well, you know what that's taboo That's all taboo. But I mean if the if the other chips you think they'd be like that's kind of gross Yeah, that's kind of like gross because like bing bong here. She's got huge tips Right, don't you want to just fill bing bong with childs? They say that we need more of us. They keep begging us to fuck They say that the chimpanzees aren't hanging out with cheetah because he found love and again, it's all quite disgusting But yeah, he's fascination with humans

But it's also because cheetah was a pet too, which is also a flat a red flag cheetah was a pet and also in 2008 Cheetah was injured in a brawl with other chimps. So these chimps never like cheetah whatsoever driven to these women to these home workers Why can't she blow a couple of kisses at the chimpanzee? I guess so and now they're walking it back now the zoo saying we've never asked We've never put a ban on her visiting him We have asked her to stop please because of we're afraid of how it will affect cheetah and his Relationships with the other animals. There is it. So there that's the thing. So now because I mean that's very european, right? I've been like they're not banning anything in europe. I mean at some point

They could they would have been like if they do fall in love who could say what that means? Here I'm the chanteleze, you know like they do have that attitude where they've been like I think they'd be trying to find if they were if they kissed once and again this podcast. Let's go Fifteen nine years in the future. I think it's wonderful that they found love. Oh, wow Honestly, just another wonderful chimp human relationship and you'll love to see it. Thank god. Anyway Um, they're kissing She kisses the glass the cheekless We just have a whole bit in our live show about jane good all fucking apes and now this story

I literally texted marcus and henry and be like, are we making reality? Is this like is this quick? Is this a crazy adam sandler movie? We're like we say it and it comes true because it's like Bulls for heads. Oh, yeah, same thing with the fucking ball the plague shit after we as we were doing the black plague And then they had to shut down lake tahoe because of squirrels with the plague and then when we we were in Denver with there was like three or four cases of people with the plague and then two kids died So maybe I'll just say this It's a shirtless summer shirtless summer for all the ladies september

Ah, god, never mind. I miss shirtless summer next summer all boobies all the time We love it both male and female. No shirt summer. We're gonna do it. No shirt summer except for for me I have to kind of wear larger shirts there. Okay Life from your grave This story is from georgia and it is It you know what it's very georgia. It's very georgia and i'm gonna say it's mostly comical Because the people of the story are already dead. So this man didn't kill anyone But a georgia dude

He wanted to steal he wanted to steal a vehicle I mean he probably had to get out of it Whatever he was doing he had to get out of there and he did end up getting out of there This man actually was able to make an escape. How did he do it? His name is kizan griffin. He's 23 years old He stole a mortuary mortuary van to escape the police And as he was as the police were chasing him dead bodies kept on flying out of the back of the van Yeah, it sounds like he was like I know that he wasn't but it would be kind of fun like in a chase movie

Like if this was a movie the idea of like throwing corpses onto the highway for the cops as they serve all around them is incredible He didn't stop them from flying out. No, no, no, no, they kind of Just ran over and I say this with a bit of a smile because if I was one of the corpses in the back of that van I'd be like it's kind of fun to be a little I know like my final thing is to be like get out of here kizan I imagine their their families are upset, but also when it comes down to it think of the memes If we're gonna be upset about something when it comes down to it at least that your precious Love ones would go forward to to make a moment for the internet to all come together

It's kind of cool stan henderson the owner of the van and stand stan henderson's and son's Mortuary and stockbridge. It's always and sons. It is you gotta get all the families in there But what if these are the kids are never in the naming process? It's always like and then we have kids and now it's and sons. It's like what if I didn't want to Put makeup on corpses for the rest of my father's heart exactly Then you break your fucking father's heart and stan henderson just given the name the george In the Georgian nature of the name stan henderson. I'm assuming he's got old man strength This is what he had to say. He says it's ridiculous that the dead can't even rest

Please chase griffin from the city of connors to decalb county where the van became disabled after striking multiple vehicles Employ that tire the suspect then fled the van and ran into a nearby wood line Please search the area but we're unable to locate this guy I mean to be honest for him to make it out because in conures. There is a lot of like wild out there Like there's a lot of stuff like demons Number one. Did they look very hard? I don't know They probably did to be honest. I know some georgia cops or some of them are good Some of them have been hitting that barbecue. You know what I mean? I kind of like those cops better where it's like

Yeah, yeah, they go up to the well There's a bush here. So I'm gonna have to get back to the air conditioning So Griffin stole the van to escape the pursuing police and the gurney rolled out of the back And uh, yeah, it was in the parking lot where it came and finally it ended up in a parking lot People were able to secure all of the bodies. So someone had to go be like larry go pick up all the bodies on the roads You're like and and this is my 2021 bingo card Anyway, he's he's out there and I don't know what he's on he is wanted for several felonies

So he's wanted for several felons. So he's obviously, uh, they are looking for him And we will find out what the heck it is that he did I don't know what if he didn't if he didn't do anything if it's drugs. I say, you know what? Yeah, I mean Yeah, I mean, yeah, it's just drugs when it comes down to it But what a day like that's an episode of cops that every producer at cops right now I know the show is defunct, but theoretically would just like that is gold. Yes, that's gold. Oh, yes, of course It'd be very nice. It reminds me of speaking of cops. Hmm. Oh jay simpson. Isn't that what happened to to a norberg? When he was on the gurney

Oh my god, that is what happened to him That's incredible Wow. Yes. Anyway. All right. So that's a little story out of georgia. There is also multiple break ins That's what he's uh, he's wanted for multiple multiple car break ins. So technically car break is kind of saying I feel like it is A lot of times it is a crime because you are in need of cash desperately and you Uh, can't get access to it. Yes That's possible ran out whatever it is But honestly when it comes down to it can't be stealing a mortuary van tossing bodies everywhere. It makes people map

Really does what I will also okay speaking of on the run and this is an embolden. This is the breaking news Hot off the presses And yeah, we're recording this in the past. So you I don't know what's gonna happen when this episode comes out But imagine we're live Chicago Be on the lookout for a white box van with red graffiti on the side of it We can maybe uh, we will maybe on our sush mates. We can go ahead and we can pop up the picture of this truck There is random eggings happening throughout the chicago land area and we're talking about the neighborhoods of

Cabrini green cabrini green west town. They're all in the loop So I believe in chicago. They're coming for you cabrini town wickerpock goose island a man um with a the the dubious Description of being short and Hispanic is driving this truck around and viciously egging people cabrini green. That's where candy man takes place Yes, yes, so this story is really pretty deep right now So this dude he's driving around as Henry said in a really big ass truck big ass truck I don't know whether or not he works in that truck. There's some there's some theory one theory

It's floating around is that it is a student doing this. There is one of those because it's kind of an art project I mean, I don't know but people are getting egged whole lines of cars are being egged all night They show up in their cars all covered cars all covered in an egg and what seems to be like The actual bad thing that they did was that a woman with a Not a carousel. What do you put a stupid baby in? Uh, you put him in a backpack and then you dry You get a couple of rocks and put him in the backpack. No, I'm just joking. I love that van You take a baby you put in a bowling bag case. What is it called stroller?

Jesus christ. We are we are not gonna have kids. We don't know anything about children I'm but a woman with a stroller was heavily pelted with eggs and that is getting people of the The people of Chicago extremely upset and it seems to be that there's There's some there's like apparently a lot going on in Chicago right now The cops are not willing to put a lot of resources towards this story So this is going to take a vigilante and of course Chicago We talked about this again on top have be careful with the speed cameras Those companies make a lot of money off of you trying to get to work a recent incident was caught on security camera

Where a daughter and a mother also were narrowly hit by the eggs So this is this is like joker stuff We grow up we grew up in the world of columbine in the world of the dc sniper. I was heavily egged dare I say There's something's kind of I would be so pissed. I'd be pissed. I'd be egged You remember when we got this as a do you remember when we got egged as adults? Well, did you know that was me Eddie and Holden walking through yeah out to when he used to live on trunk street I wouldn't I would not egg Eddie. That's a horse. Oh, man 15 year olds have no fear They feel they feel this is what I was talking about earlier. He's a little rascals

I have nothing to lose. They're full of calm and and viciousness They don't understand what they're doing and I remember it was like a movie with me Holden and Eddie walking down the street and these kids and bikes pulled up in front of us. We're all like What up, and it was like october 30th, and they were like get him and then they started pelting us with eggs We're like oh Oh, we had a run back a run away from them because you can't attack them. There were more of them than us. They're all full testosterone and they're they're all jacked up because they work out all day at school Yeah, that's what they do at school. They work out all day

They don't sit and stare at computers and learn nothing according to mosa tam sit She says I would love to understand what their motivation was Chaos and what this is all about. It's chaos and it's technically if I was the man driving this Would I have a great time? Yes, if I was the if do I see this as an option for me in the future if everything goes south Sure, yes Well, there's been a total of a hundred collected sightings. Yes, and there's a full map You can find it on reddit not to direct anyone to that site get on and get off of it

But tam it's a tam sot says there are many issues at play in this very complex issue a lot of issues like The egg truck how did it fall through the cracks? No Oh, we're being funny now. I don't know now. We think it's going to be funny. I don't know That was a purposeful pun or not, but he she goes on to say I think folks would like to try to understand What they are trying to communicate This woman is so Midwest sweet. Like I just want to know what's going on. What are you trying to say? Hey, what hey, what are you trying to do? That's all I'm not I'm not mad

I'm just wondering what are you trying to do? All right. What are you trying to communicate? He's just like I want to hit you with eggs, bitch Okay, that that is clear then that it's clear. Here's your you are saying she goes on to say It could be a form of protest in which case one could respect the way they're going about things Or it could just be a prank or it could just be malicious. We just don't know we just don't know So this is the most it's very most sympathetic woman to ever talk about being egged ever Well, because you know what actually makes it seem vaguely innocent It's the fact that the eggs were not frozen because when I was I never heard of that before that's a that's a murder weapon

You didn't fucking have that didn't happen to you as a kid. That happened to me as a kid regular old eggs Oh, no, they used to freeze those eggs. I was kill you. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It was fun for them little rascals And then this is an adult who was ever doing this as an adult and I want to say He must have a hard job. He might be you know what I might even say this How what he might be like an amazon prime like delivery person or something like that or you have I could see him You have so much pressure. There's a lot of pressure. They have they're all timed. There's a system They have to like check in all the time. They're being driven, right? So let's say you get off of work and then some people they have a big glug of scotch

But maybe he's been in a program and he can't fucking drink anymore. Some people fucking smoke a big doobie Maybe he he can't do it because it makes him paranoid, right? Well, it's kind of shit. Maybe like, you know, maybe his family's gone or whatever and then every day what he goes He gets off of work. He goes straight to a convenience store He buys several dozen eggs and that's how he Equalizes I think that's a fantastic approach Henry and I could totally see that being a Viable option. He could also be in the egg game Why would he be do I guess trying to you ever every time with the supply just saying fucking eggs every time he looks at an eggs

You know, it's my favorite stories of Christmas are and I know it's like not technically funny But whatever when the FedEx guys dump all the shit the dumpsters and they get all mad Oh, yeah, I punch all the stuff and it's just it's just good. So, you know, no one's really getting that hurt I mean it sucks and everything it sucks. I understand like to see brown boxes after you work at E ups Yes, every day delivering hundreds of brown boxes. I would have PTSD From the brown box and I would punch everyone I saw. Oh, yeah, I could see how you could be driven to this type of low rent madness Because it's not even that bad yet We'll see how if it escalates in any way shape or form but right now it just seems well because you know

What's also the shame about this is that as I'm keep googling like Chicago egging truck and shit. There is an actual like breakfast truck That is like a nice one that is called like the the Eggman the Chicago Eggman, right the Eastman No, it's called the Eastman egg company. Oh, and All of the searches for the Eastman egg company keep getting buried farther and farther south The more this story gets bumped up and the more so maybe it's This guy Or maybe it's an enemy of the Eastman egg egg company. Oh Westman Waffle House

Oh, don't even get them going And just lastly Tom said yeah, fuck eggs waffle time. It's not for waffles. You fucking whores That's what he screams all the time as he throws eggs everywhere. You say fuck eggs You know what that reminds me of Guy fury Where has Guy been? We love Guy Fieri, but I'm not uh, he could say one of his guys He wouldn't be doing this himself He'd have one of his guys doing this if he was going to commit any crimes, which he won't if he did this would be the Guy Fieri crime Slathering people in eggs as he's been forced to consume them

But I don't understand eggs. He hates eggs, but now he's at the level He can make sure he doesn't have to eat eggs He never does every once in a while. He's on triple triple D and like a chef is like, but you're gonna like this one guy This is a good egg sandwich And you know what I'll give credit to Fieri because you know what he does take a bite and he always goes They're wiggly like, you know, he does it. He does not like eggs I watched him somebody put an egg on top of what looked to be an out-of-balance hamburger And guy slowly took the egg off just took the egg off and didn't have any of it

So if you're on triple D and the in the uh dish does have an egg, but guys there just go egg-free Just go egg-free. Also, let's not do these eggs on hamburgers anymore That is my hot take for the day So the last quote from tamson and I love this person She says if we can figure out an egg thrower, then maybe we can figure out how to reduce shootings And maybe we can solve some other issues like honestly I just had like an emotional reaction to that. That's so sad. She lastly says How can we work most effectively with cpd chicago police department most effectively in the age of the internet?

So things are so bad. They see an opportunity I don't know if there is I feel like what's happening on the south side of chicago Doesn't have a heck of a lot to do with eggs Well, it does not it has to do with jabs housing and lack of upward mobility, which we need To provide those people. Yes, we do. Also, uh Schools the way they were funded should not be by municipality. It should be by state income And it should be spread equally amongst the districts, but that's for a whole another show. Okay. Let's move on. Let's move on There's more sad stories and more gross stories. I mean the egg thrower story

I don't even know where to classify it as because it is comical enough. It makes your day shittier I've been dumped on by it. We all have it's fine. I've been dumped on by a pigeon before and I'm gonna say I don't must rather have an egg to the head because that pigeon poop don't go away It does it. It's good luck though to get shed on by a pigeon. No, that's it. That's a human being lie That's a lie. All things that we say are good luck are for human being lies. It's all just made up Um, but uh, this is just more of a call to listeners of last podcast on the left and side stories You see a picture of this van you get hit by this van Tell us because this is time seven car collected. We're gonna collect sightings ourselves side stories lpotl a gmail.com

I want the chicago scrambler on this show if you are out there if let's say you're driving around hitting peoples with these eggs We can get him like we can get him to sound like bane Yeah, honestly if you are out there and you're you are the perpetrator if you are the chicago eggman We want to talk to you. We want to know your motives. We want to we want to get inside your head We want to broadcast your message to the world at the very least you can email us and i'm not sure If it's uh, gonna be a good enough message to broadcast, but nonetheless In the world of true death deadly violence that we cover all the time Little egg little egg throwing is almost lighthearted. It is it is

And but not maybe in the end there's something we can learn from it We'll maybe go out there with a pan always have a pan with you Or you have eggs too and you throw them back I want to do this one story really quick because this story just scares the shit out of me Yes, it's about this 20 year old gal. She's a chicken texas. Oh, this is a scary story She looks like yeah, just a nice cute person. Okay, right? She does look like I don't even how to describe it She looks like She is 20 years old, but she looks like she could be 14. She looks very small very diminutive or

The mugshot makes her look like 45. I don't know. It does it. I don't know man. Look at her. It's looking like a little girl But she has the eyes Of someone who's seen a lot of stuff. So in any way this girl Um authority said on monday emma pressler. She's 19 was the prime suspect In a horrific august 6th incident which left a 33 year old devon graham dead and his wife 26 year old carissa lindrose Hospitalized with burns across 70 percent of their bodies. Yeah, so she lit this couple on fire Houston police say she still remains at large. However, this is not the first case of

extreme violence no She was actually acquitted of murder Um last september Uh, she was charged with the murder of a 20 year old cypress texas woman Her name was crl rod as she slept on september 13th 2020 rod who suffered from cerebral palsy Palsy was shot and killed in a flurry of bullets fired inside of her family's home Presley was the lead suspect. She was charged with killing rod Um, but then she was I believe acquitted

And I don't know if the jury did the might the right decision And I think there might be some jurors be like young girl like that ain't no week. She could do anything wrong Um, but she could and she can and she did. Um, I'm not gonna call this the um What's the joker's uh, the joker lady Harley Quinn this is might be the harley quinn effect. She kind of looks like harley quinn I'm sure she played harley quinn on halloween because that's an acceptable halloween costume that everyone can get behind She was not ready to be rehabilitated It sounds like back into society because again, she killed two people by burning or killed one and desperately injured another

By burning them alive It sounds like they might be tangentially connected to some form of gang activity Presley's boyfriend is that the car that they drive by shooting happened was owned by her boyfriend austin mccalla And they found her later on nearby and they based the reason why she got acquitted because they just thought that she was in the car They eventually went ahead and charged another dude with her boyfriend and three other people as the people that murdered The poor woman inside of that house. We felt it was because it was some form of gang Fight between this between their son There was it was not the person who was murdered but her brother that was the actual target of the violence

And they've been feuding with a gang known as 10k Um, but now we now know uh that she is not an innocent person. No, this is according to a neighbor I feel so bad for this little community in texas. The neighbor says it never stops Um, she was asked to be identified only by aileen, which is her middle name, which it's still part of your name It is i would have just gone with like La ronda I mean honestly if you're gonna go say anything you want so you could be the human torch But that's what happens. That's why she killed those two other people. Oh, that's sad

So the neighbor goes on just last week. I was saying there's nothing going on at their house lately and then this Oh shouldn't have said that because that happened as soon as she said that she's like hey, they seem to be pretty peaceful and it's like And then they lit the flight they they lit the fuse and these one person died and another person again covered in burns 70% of their bodies apparently at the house where pressler lives There's some indication of prostitution and some drug sales. This is what the neighbor said She says I hope the cops will start finally start believing us We're hoping that they get out of the neighborhood. It seems like I'm not pro HOA

But it seems like one you never have an HOA. No, you can't ever defend an HOA seems like it's a mafia You have to live with they tell you what color your mailboxes can be imagine America. Um, I'm with you But imagine HOA is like an fbi federal Entity that's me and they send the HOA my neighborhood send the I don't even like to use the word karen So we'll just call you send barb send a barb is the one that ever is a friendly karen barb is a friendly karen But barb also makes sure the mail also karen's can't be friendly karen's absolutely. I hate I hate I know a lot of great karen. I know a lot of wonderful karen's it's just like whatever But send one of the most strict HOA people to this area and she could solve this immediately

She would have those people out of there and then this neighborhood could be safe Um, and it's just so sad that the police weren't believing The neighborhood is there like something's going wrong in that house and the police were like Let's see if we can get some dead bodies before we do anything here. So apparently this Woman emma pressler was also according to the couple that was murdered They said that she was the creepy neighbor next door that kept coming by and staring at them They apparently they were last see and they were found later on after they where they went missing for several days I imagine that she was some form of she tried to rob them and then because she is a fucking moron

Thought that I could get rid of these bodies by burning them Like I really that's the way I would in my mind is what what happened. That's because she's an impulsive dangerous person Um, because you know, she's not she's 20 years old so her brain hasn't developed yet She was fucking even understand that her actions have consequences probably Um, so she killed these two random people and a robbery maybe gone wrong and then try to get rid of the body Yeah, I mean I have I have some sympathy, but again if no, I have no sympathy It's just if these were if these were boys specifically boys of color They'd say those adults knew exactly what they were doing and they need to be thrown away for life

So because she looks like Elsa Jean that porn star girl. Everything is fine, right? Press lure had previously faced numerous charges including theft drug possession evading arrest and failure to appear in court and Henry Can you take a guess what drug she has an outstanding warrant for using? Can you take a guess? Is it no way? methamphetamine You nailed it. No way methamphetamine is definitely the drug of choice when you're going to burn two people alive That's a mass crime right there. Oh, yeah, because I think it's because you know what would really throw me off Getting all the gasoline. I feel like by then I'd be like, what am I doing here?

I'm just gonna chop these guys up according to her according to her grandfather He says she was pretty well raised, but uh, something went wrong because she's obviously I don't fucking know. I don't know. Anyway, the manhunt is on And we'll see what happens in this case. So this can be an update most likely. They'll find her sooner than later Yes, because I don't think that she's very bright Well, I think she's probably you can be you can be evil and fucked up and stupid So I imagine it sounds like this is uh, she's not Uh, db. Cooper. No, but Emma Pressler again given her physical appearance

I could see her also right now in Las Vegas. Oh, yeah, just what you doing big? Oh my god Just like on dj. Khaled's playing Funny story how I got here. Who knows um speaking of what drugs can do and what Not even drugs. Sometimes the substance that you use is a drug Uh, it can make you make a couple of mistakes in your life and end up leaving towards leaving towards your death What's that and it's not a good one? This is a gujarat youth by the name of Salman Mirza He died after sealing his peepee hole closed. Oh, no with adhesive during sex

Um, and I try not to get the woman pregnant But they're also thinking that it might be because he was using the same adhesive to huff quite a bit of it And he might have died after the process of ejaculating back into his own balls. That can kill you I don't think he's good. Did he die? It's not like how Chris Chan was drinking all of his own cum with fagomix And in order to recycle it so he would stay manly That's your one reference. I'm sorry God, I hate that um

Is so this did he die of blue balls? Is this technically a blue ball death? Is this the first ever recorded blue ball death? I don't think that makes them blue I think it makes them like purple balls because it's just the cum got out, but they went back in So he sealed his his genitals shut before big sex with this partner Um, so apparently they were in a hotel. How could that feel better than not using a condom? I have no condoms really make it sensitive down desensitize it down there. Here's some here's some Apoxie he didn't have condoms that decided let's just glue the fucking hole together The day later in june 23rd here. He came to himself

He was found unconscious and near in shrubs near the hotel Um, his friend Firo Shayek found him and brought him home Salman was later admitted to sola silver hospital where his condition deteriorated and he died So he was already kind of half dead Um, he said the viscera samples of the disease have been sent for forensic examination The police officer investigating the case said that the couple used to abuse a drug that involved a whitener and the adhesive Which is that which is inhaled Okay

This is a sad accident and it's he made money for his elderly parents and his two sisters I do it. What um, he was just trying to have safe sex and maybe some education I think that he was just I think that a lot of things went wrong to get us here Also, I mean, it's not it's not foolproof. Don't take uh, don't take my advice here whatsoever But the the father from dirty work He makes a good point pulling out It's not 100 guaranteed, but it's safer than Gluing your fucking peepee whole shot

And if you're not going to use a condom, it's the best you can do or dare I say anal Yeah, I mean anal. Just stick it to anal. Um, that's common common the any other part of her body. Um, there's some other I just last podcast left. We just urge you we urge you to keep your holes Permanently open right don't act don't cut off access to any of your holes If you can let each hole live because you know when it comes down to it It's the reason why your body has holes because things got to come out of it And they got to come out because if it makes a read I guess it fucking man your cum just turns evil

I don't know what happens. It hits the top of the thing goes back into your balls. I don't even know if that I think he died of a drug overdose Maybe maybe a bit of both maybe a bit of both because also I don't even know how you pry that back open I guess you can use like you just pin or something. Oh god because you don't do it permanently seal it Especially like no, you can't permanently seal you have to be able to take a shower It's just got me somewhere to get it open again. I don't know. I don't think so I don't know why he's dead. No, why was he in the shrubs? Anyway? All right. Just lastly here. This isn't really a story It's more of me being scared and Henry probably loving it a robot's now controlling the neurons of a rat's brain

So they're just a rat brain is controlling the neurons of a robot. Whatever. I think it's cool There you go. I mean, I just think it's one of those where we just need to be careful because they are really going to try to replace us With certain certain jobs, right? Like especially like they're going to try to like use that This is the way they're doing and the building it up. So you have to figure out. What do we do to make sure Our servers you have a fucking rat boss now. You have a robot that is being controlled by a wraparound I I think that that's a bad idea because I don't trust rats. No, I would prefer if you made it like Like a puffin's brain like a Labrador retrievers brain could run a robot

I believe that they are cute Because of their limited ability to communicate If you could really get puffin would he would kill us Have you seen those like instagram videos or whatever of dogs learning command buttons? Like it's a dog that learns how to communicate via pressing buttons On a like sheet you should look at it. It's both heartening and also like again. Yeah I don't want you to be able to talk. I like that. Wendy can't talk I mean because it's kind of that's that's kind of one of the perks

I know yeah, because I don't need to know everything on wendy's mind I also don't necessarily need to be criticized by wendy. No for the way. I'm raising her absolutely because that's why I don't have a child That's exactly. All right, everyone. Well, let's get to hero of the week So this week's hero of the week is a mother. It's a mother. It's a mother. And you know what it comes down to it Sometimes as a mother Oh, henry tom. Sometimes I just something I think about I just think about how you used to be A little little ant inside of my gut. Oh god. Now you are man It's disgusting. Okay. We need a new backyard. We need an entirely new backyard

Yes, so that's why she budgeted up in that way calling an ant compliment sign of her Didn't she call you jesus christ one time? I don't even want to talk about it on the show A california woman is being called a hero by state officials after she fought off a mountain lion with her bare hands When the mountain lion attacked her five-year-old son, the boy was playing near a tree in his home in calabasa You hope that this happens, you know what I mean? It was a 65 pound mountain lion and all of a sudden the mountain lion was like, yeah, god damn it I found myself a great victim So the mountain lion grabbed the five-year-old, dragged him about 45 yards

But then the mom was like, oh, shit. That's my kid and then she ran out ran out of the house and started punching and striking the lion with Her bare hands. So law enforcement was notified of the attack and while and wildlife officials went to the family's home And the officer noticed an aggressive mountain lion in the corner of the property. So the mountain lion was like, yeah, you got round one, bitch I'm waiting for round two. He's coming back. Oh man. This is the revenge story I'd actually really like to hear indeed officials said because the mountain lion's behavior and location it believed they say quote Believed it was likely the attacking lion and to protect public safety. They did shoot and kill it Um wildlife forensic scientist analyzes an endangered animal. Yeah, I don't know. No, I don't think not mountain lions There's a bunch of them wildlife forensic scientists analyze samples from the underneath of the claws of the suspect lion carcass

And isolated traces of human tissue and blood with a DNA profile that matched the young victim So yes, they did do more detective work than they did when oj killed those two people Okay Results were conclude conclusive that it was the attacking lion that was shot by the wildlife officer on the scene dare I say Thank god. Otherwise, they would have just killed that is the prime example Shooting as questions later be like, thank god. Yeah, I mean, well good Uh, they uh, they apparently they are listed as least concerned by the international union for conservation of nature Um, and so they're doing well. So they may probably did it by eating children

Maybe the next man. They got to learn the big we got to beat them That's how I always believe when it comes down to it I believe that when it comes when it comes down to it the strongest do survive and need to survive 65 pounder. That's a pretty healthy size mountain. It's like us versus the robots the robots When it comes down to it the war's gonna happen no matter what's gonna happen between us and the robots We have to win the war if we want to remain the supreme form of intelligence on this planet All right, we have to absolutely. Absolutely. All right, everyone. So the california. She's unnamed by the way But she is hero of the week. Good work

Um Now it's time for some listener emails. Oh great number one a lot of people have made friends with bees Oh, really? It mostly involves putting out a puddle of sugar water And the bee comes there Looking for the sugar water Um, there's some man who tamed a bunch of wasps, which is actually really interesting. That sounds difficult It does you my understanding is the wasp doesn't provide the same benefits of as the bee So a wasp is more of a nuisance. Yes, I'm sure they do something good

mosquitoes don't you saying that has guaranteed that it does somebody let me know but also Mosquitoes my understanding of a mosquito is they serve zero purpose whatsoever other than perhaps protecting the rainforest because it makes it uninhabitable But they're scared about destroy. There's the thing they've been talking about eradicating mosquitoes But then they're also really afraid of the the repercussions of just getting rid of an animal Let us know what you think side stories lpotl Gmail.com because right now I'm like get out of here mosquitoes. Yes, they are very dangerous And they're gonna probably be part of the next spread of whatever epidemic that we have that they are actually very good at spreading disease to humankind fantastic

There so that's that's one little update another update was People writing in a lot. We have a lot of brewers that listen to the show I believe they said one of the one of the main takeaways is is that it comes down to there's a process called when you distill booze down There's like heads bodies and tails and tails is the stuff that you're supposed to get rid of right? um And you're supposedly that kind of shit But the the the idea is that like maybe someone does not actually understand the difference between all all of these different processes

Which is why that lethuanian woman might have killed all of those people And the other thing was that the poisoning also might have been the result of if you start distilling to make high-proof booze You can really mess it up fairly easily You can concentrate the toxins in the tailings accidentally or the metal you use in the still can be toxic It's possible to do safely, but you should know what you're doing Um, they said that one thing that also be said they could have possibly used the source of alcohol Could have been some industrial source of alcohol that could end up being toxic Okay, so there's many different reasons be careful, but here are some of these longer form emails

I grew up outside of Tlequa, Oklahoma in a small community of Briggs our house backed up to a ravine that eventually led to a valley of pumpkin holler I believe part of the movie where the red fern grows was filmed there In order to get to pumpkin holler You have to drive through Tlequa and several miles out of town and then circle back I just picked up a friend of mine from there and was driving back when I saw what appeared to be a Pterodactyl fly over my car. I shit you not the underbelly of the creature would smooth and tan Its wingspan was impressive and the shadow it created was probably would caught my eye

I slammed on my brakes and frantically looked around to see where it went, but it was long gone My friend my friend unfortunately did not see it Okay, many years later. I was describing this event to another friend and he turned pale He then told me of a night And he and his wife had been traveling through Briggs and had chased one with his car before it flew off into the woods This was not one mile from my home The creature that he described was darker in color, but could only be described as some large winged creature Okay, cool. Love the love the flying

entity Situations this was about canny wood. This is about the the canny was this is about canny wood A pittsburgh one of my favorite places in the world where we go. It's got the phantoms revenge my favorite roller coasters is an amusement park The mad shitter of canny wood As opposed to the happy shitter of canny wood. Oh, yeah, um I love this. I worked there back in the summers of 1999 and 2000 and those halcyon days were ones I look back at fondly now I wanted to tell you about a guy who used to come into the park when I worked there

He was known as the mad shitter of canny wood and he'd visit the park every single day He would shit on all of the rides. No I was thinking what just didn't kick him out. Yeah Just fucking kick him out. All right. What the fuck but apparently he was mentally handicapped And he loved canny wood, but he would shit on the rides for some reason I get a feeling the shitting was intentional and not accidental, but I don't know Eventually they forced some poor canny wood employee to escort him around all day every single day But he would still shit on all the rides anyway. He's gonna diaper up

That's pretty much it got tickets to your live show coming up to Pittsburgh and I look forward to seeing it Well, thank you so much. I mean at some point. I understand you want to be all inclusive inclusive and you know And you never want to take the smile away But maybe say you can only come once a month like I don't know. I feel like if you're constantly shitting on the rides There has to be some kind of standard. There has to be a way There just has to be a way to communicate that this is not good We have to figure out what to do with this wrap it up wrap it up garbage bags and rubber pants rubber pants They got those. Oh my goodness gracious once about a time when I was in college

I decided it was a great idea to move out of my rent-free parents house What a bad decision that turned out to be. Hmm. I had trouble being able to pay for rent gas food utilities Yeah, yeah, you were fucked. I know that's everything. Let's call everything. Yeah I knew this guy for a while looking at bugging me and he had this offer for me that I he said he didn't involve sex But it paid $300 Out of desperation. I called him and I asked more about what he wanted All he wanted was for me to pee on him and pee in my pants

So for eight months the rest of my life is sex. It's kind of sexual. Sure I peed on this dude or in my pants for $300 a pop He had me out twice sometimes three times a week to pee on him or in my pants. There you go Sometimes it was just so he could watch BP After my lease was up. I quit doing that and I moved back home. Isn't that a lovely tale of romance? You're just one last story. Very nice I mean you have to you have to buy pants constantly. I feel like I would you can watch them You have one pair of pee pants. I would I would I would if I was hiring

I would give them a a surplus for new pants. I would yes feel like here's $15 a good old navy Because the sales are going on. They really are cheap. It's kind of crazy It's like, are you giving us away old baby? But the quality isn't necessarily My brother-in-law is a retired homicide detective and out of all of his stories The bathtub corpse is the one that has stuck with me One winter day. He was called to a second story apartment for a dead body As he approached the upstairs apartment trickling water could be heard He wondered why the officer who first responded didn't turn the running water off

Upon entering the bathroom. He saw a middle-aged man who had passed away in his tub At least a week prior probably more His body had become so bloated that the water was overflowing onto the floor. That's probably what prompted the call He described the bloated man's skin as almost translucent And said that the best description was that of the Mike Myers character of fat bastard They quickly determined that there was no foul play involved in his death. It was most likely a heart attack It's now almost dark and freezing outside So despite the overwhelming stench my brother-in-law and another officer waited outside for the inside

So they waited inside for the coroner who was running light Tired of waiting around they decided to go get a body bag out of the car and help out the coroner by bagging the man themselves They figured if they laid the bag next to the tub they could quickly lift them up and out onto the bag But that's not what happened as they both lifted the body the man's arm fell off at the shoulder It didn't completely separate from the body But the flesh is kind of disintegrated under the pressure of his hand lifting up under the disease man's armpit And the shoulder joint just kind of fell out. He described it as Pulled in a drumstick out of a roasted turkey if the turkey was made of jello

Um, then they said oh, maybe we should wait. Yeah, definitely the coroner do that When the coroner came his first words were he tried to move him. You've got to get the bag under him in the top You can't lift the body in like this But apparently this happens a lot And he said he drove a directly home after everything was wrapped up a 30 minute drive in below freezing temperatures with the windows down Upon driving home He left the cruiser outside a window still down took off all of his clothes in the garage and sprinted new to the shower Hoping he wouldn't bring the smell inside with him his wife wound up throwing all the clothes away and took his personal car

To work the next day. Oh my god He said that yeah, you know, he said as a listener as it as his nephew He asked the question What did it smell like and he said I'm gonna tell you what you don't have the frame of reference for me to tell you What it smelled I completely understand that I I can't I went to the tombs in uh in Uh beneath Chinatown in Manhattan. They've never been cleaned before that smell was unbelievable But everyone is still alive. Yes a week in a tub. Whoo Who I just want to live my life that even if I spend two days dead in a tub one of someone will call me

You know, you mean that someone will look for me try to find me be like hey, where's Henry even if they're mad You know, I mean, I hope that's what happens. Yes indeed But then again not a bad place to die I will live my life as a man that will be noticed when he's dead because of all the screaming And maybe all the fires that will result of whatever it does in my last final actions As a result as some kind of revenge against the government or what the long list of people who have wronged me I was thinking more is probably dabbing. You probably die. Well that it might start a fire to your couch Laugh while I'm doing it. That's for certain. That's how you'll know because you whatever it is

I do what I hope it is is in some form of ice cream truck and you'll hear the Like oh no sea level celebrity Henry Zabrowski because by then I hope they get to see that'd be great right now You're at z. Oh Put me at r. Oh technically we are uh in our field. We are quite successful. That's why I like to stay in my field Yeah, I don't want to be like anybody else. I don't want anyone else's life I don't want your life and then love the fact that I don't need to execute this plan I don't think within the next 10 years. Absolutely. Well, you're not allowed to I'm not no We're not allowed to die in the next 10 years. No one's allowed to die and I'm continuing to move the goalpost on that

10 years from this day from this day. Absolutely. Um, but guys, what a wonderful time It's so good to be out in the monks of living. Absolutely and we want to thank everyone for being so cool As you know, there's things going on outside of our control So all of the protocols for covet the showing of the uh ID and vax card and stuff Thank you all so much for being willing to do that. Obviously. This is not a constitutional issue There is no constitutional right to go see a live performance. This is just one of those things like it's like a it's like a ride Sometimes you're not tall enough to ride in this case. This is just like another regulation It's just a regulation. You just have to fucking do your shit get your stabby stab come out and see us

We got this shit going. It's so exciting to be out there Man, the audience has been fucking great. So sweet and thank you all so much for just being unbelievably Pleasant as we're just trying to get through this shit and it was it was awesome. We were talking to a security guard I forget in what venue and we're like our crowd's super cool man's podcast live show comedy, you know, it's it's all good They're super awesome. They're gonna look fucking scary, but I promise you they're super sweet He's like, yeah, that's good man because corolla came through town and there was a massive fight in the crowd I was like, yeah, we don't really get the agro

Oh And then another woman says she got a divorce from somebody because he called us soy boys. Oh, yes I love that term physically. I will destroy you but then also what does it even mean? It's just something that we don't need to know. We don't have to know it. It's outside of us Uh, anyway, well, thank you all so much for supporting us this past mini tour and we can't wait to see you on the road In uh later september we'll be back out there Here is a reminder go and talk to your local comic book store If you're interested in our comic book soul plumbers go into the dc line the new horror line

Go and talk to your local comic book and your local comic book store and ask them to order our book Because that would be fucking sweet. Um, it's so cool guys All of our cool all of the family of spring hill jack. Oh, they were awesome they all came out and ran merch for us because The fucking merch guy for the our columbus show had some kind of fucking meltdown or something and he let He let go all of our merch people for some reason and so we like had a they came in The entire family the extended family of spring hill jack came out and did merch for us So remember like when you buy our coffee and you buy coffee from spring hill jack

You are you are supporting a local business a small business It's five people that do all of this shit and to be honest it means so much to them and it means so much to us So it really is amazing. They're uh, they're doing so well overwhelmed, but in a positive way So thank you all so much for um, I don't know just supporting supporting the extended lpn fam. All right, everyone Thanks for listening. Hail yourselves. Hey, I'll say my good to larger Help me my my first okay, not if you call my mother or some come over here. Come on. Come on. Sit on my knee I like it. Come on. Hey, buddy. Hey, I love when you ended up. Listen to my show. I love it when you ended all horned up Mm-hmm. This show is made possible by listeners like you

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