Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: The Family Butcher

Episode Date: March 25, 2021

Ben 'n' Henry break down this week's true crime news: a man murders his grandfather and keeps the ears in his pockets, a serial stowaway is arrested, a Grindr cannibal, and MUCH MORE. Plus, an interview with the bean stunt man!Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0

There's no place to escape to. This is the last stop on the left side story of your glade. That's when the cannibalism started side stories. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, Marvin Heemeyer Heemeyer was very creative. No, and I think that that is one way to put it. Yeah.

And I think that what you said is correct. And what the Thompson twins are talking about, which is true. Why do they destroy the kill-dozer? That would have been so much fun. You got Joe Biden in the kill-dozer, kill-dozen COVID, driving around like anybody can go. Anytime there's a local hero or something, you can put him in the kill-dozer or anybody you don't like.

You can put him in front of the kill-dozer. And the kill-dozer coming to get you. We're talking about the documentary tread. If you haven't seen it, check it out. I also don't know if you understand COVID. You can't run it over with a kill-dozer. That is like killing mosquitoes with a shotgun. Will it work?

Maybe. But you're also going to shoot your friend in the face. Get out of the way. All right. Welcome to Side Stories, everyone, I am Ben, hanging out with Henry. Documentary, we must tell you about tread. Henry watched it a few years ago.

We've talked about this a little bit. The kill-dozer was a monument to the imaginations of Americans. Well, there are aspects of all of us that we can see in Marvin Heemeyer. He was the man who became disgruntled, had a massive mental break, and decided to take on his town that he thought wronged him,

even though it seems like they didn't. Anyway, if you haven't seen tread, check out the documentary. Really interesting. And it'll take you all over the world in your mind. And the nice thing is no one actually died. It's just a bunch of buildings. I mean, more have died.

But no people who did not build a kill-dozer died. Kill-dozer, he wanted to go down by his own hand, because he was, I guess, again, a true sovereign citizen. But it kind of reminds me of the, what was that car renovation show, Exhibit, with the, I put a kill in your dozer so you could kill while you doze. That's a fantastic impression of Exhibit. Hell yeah.

Absolutely nailed it. That's the thing with Marv. They show he has a book with Bill O'Reilly, but I could also see him being a Bernie Sanders, bro. Like, the guy was just upset about a lot of stuff. You never know. It's like when the KKK and the Black Panther sometimes get together because they both hate the government.

On Christmas, on Mori Povich, or on Springer, remember that? Well, I hope everyone is doing well out there. You're not, though. I know you're not. Some are. A lot of people are doing fantastically. People are capital F fine right now. They're capital F fine.

Every single time I catch up with somebody over Zoom that I haven't spoken to about nine months, that first question of, so, how you doing? And everyone goes, how are we good? Like, knowing that they just came from, like, their hair was just in a rat nest, just screaming alone in a closet. That's why I don't ask people, how are they doing?

I say, how are you feeling? Because I know what they're doing. The same thing I am. Well, speaking of weird things to do, this is the first story. We're just going to jump right into some murder in Mayhem here. You know, sometimes, like we were talking before,

when it's winter time, and you put your winter jacket on for the first time, and you say, $20 bill? Or, like, how many times? I mean, you know, like, you're running closer than me into doggie-doo bags. Sure. And all of a sudden, you reach to one of your soft pants pockets, and you've got, like, four or five of them

just sitting in there, not filled, but nice and empty. Absolutely ready to get filled. What I'm saying is, sometimes, you find surprises in your pocket. This fella out of Florida, his name is Kobe Parker, he had a bit of a surprise in his pocket. He was questioned by authorities for killing his grandfather. Turns out, there was some evidence he may have done it,

because he pulled out from his pockets his grandfather's ears. And that's not something you usually pull out of a pocket. Not every time, not unless you're doing the fun bit where you take the ear and you pull it up to your own mouth and go, can you hear me? You're listening. That's a fun thing.

That's a prepared bit. I don't think he did that, because also, this was not a surprise for him. You know what I mean? When you find the $20 bill in your old winter pocket, that's a fun surprise. He brought them with him to the police. Yes, that is true.

I will say, when you find the $20 bill, though, you do kind of remember, like, oh, yeah, that kind of makes sense. I was in a rush, popped 20. I was hammered. I was hammered, whatever. This is the last call at the bar. I got my $20 change, popped it in there.

So maybe he didn't really realize that he had the two years in there until he's like finagling his pocket. And then he pulls it out, just absentmindedly, and goes, oh, mwah, mwah, mwah, mwah. But I don't know. It sounds like he actually was a lunder, a lot of duress. Yeah. Well, he fatally stabbed his grandfather.

His grandfather was Ronald Wells Sr. Obviously extremely sad, 77 years old. Well, guess what? And this is obviously, I think it just reeks of Orlando. This Parker, initially, he told investigators that he acted in self-defense. You know how I'm always defending myself from 77-year-old men.

Yo, you wait until the 70s. I don't piss off the elderly. They have old man strength, and they are actually strong. They are strong because they fought in wars. And we've done nothing. No. 77-year-old granddad, Ronald Wells Sr. He said that he had to defend himself

because they were hanging out. He said that his grandfather attacked him with a knife during a fight that you had. Well, smoking marijuana, which is the thing, again. Man, I wish I had a grandpa I could smoke weed with. That would be so cute. Well, this one did seem to end in an altercation that involved a man getting his ears cut off.

I mean, he did this, though. Coldly did this. He claimed that he was forced to turn a knife on his grandfather, who then the body was found in the front porch with multiple stab wounds. But while he was being interviewed, Parker allegedly, he took his grandfather's ears out of his pants. Doesn't even say pockets.

So it could have just been loose sitting there. And then he lunged at a deputy while trying to grab his gun and the taser. Well, that is really not going to work itself out, buddy. Also, we're talking about a 77-year-old man. The one thing we know about old men, just judging by Walter Mathow, we got our nose and our ears. They keep on growing.

So this dude had a pretty good hunk of flesh. Two good hunks of flesh with those ears. Old man ears. That's like a half pound. They're huge. Honestly, you could have a nice sizeable, that's a serving size of your ear. You could grill it.

Oh, yeah. You could put it on a grill. But apparently this man, again, yes, it's cute. He's 30. He's smoking weed with a 77-year-old grandfather. I guess this guy doesn't, he wasn't necessarily a great dude to begin with. Apparently above Parker's bedroom,

he had a phrase imprinted on it was, quote, the family butcher, which is a scary thing. Henry, if I live with you and all of a sudden you start having butcher-themed bedroom designs, I don't see anything that says butcher. I see someone that says, I see Satan. I see some fun horror video tapes. I see no weapon that could kill me in this room.

I'm just saying, it wasn't a weapon. It had, he had a cute, funny apron that had the phrase, the family butcher prints on it, and it had plastic, bloody human ears attached to it. So yes, it is grisly in retrospect. Yes. Sure, but at the time, that's just fun. That's Halloween.

But he apparently said that he said it was grandpa's time to go. Which is, it's not up to you to decide. No, it's not up to you to decide. Also, I don't know what kind of weed they were smoking, but I think you're right. I think this is Orlando weed. It's a new Seth Rogen weed.

It's too strong. Oh, is that right? It's very intense. Well, good for him. I don't mean to blame Seth Rogen's new weed line for murder, but I'll tell you what, our new vape line will definitely not cause you to stab your grandfather to death.

Absolutely, you won't have the ability to do it. You're gonna hang out with your grandfather and have him regale you of stories of the 1970s. You might like weirdly play a game of oaky cookie, but there's probably some rum in there. God, anyway, Parker was charged with second degree murder and battery. Of course, the battery charge comes

from when he attacked law enforcement, but again, I think the major crime is stabbing his grandfather to death, cutting off his ears, carrying Seth ears to the precinct, and then showing them to the police, like small child just showing you the macaroni art that he made in kindergarten. Are we cats bring you little gifts?

Yeah, it's kind of like that. But they didn't like that gift because they knew that this was evidence. Although if you're a cop, thank you, case closed. A lot of paperwork just got figured out. You don't have to do all the, and how many times, how many serial killers you already had in your car doing right arounds?

You don't have to deal with any of that, it's great. Not to mention, if you're gonna cut something off of a corpse, I guess the easiest thing to cut would be the ears. Oh yeah, you just grabbed that ear and quickly went, lop that off. I mean, even if it knows it's got a lot of chunk you gotta get to, you could actually probably

just rip the ears off if you want to. Apparently it takes. Oh gosh, yeah, I suppose that you could. It's almost like an enlarged skin tag in some ways, the human ear. So I guess you could just grab it by the back and rip down eight pounds of pressure. Eight pounds of pressure to rip off a human ear.

That's it? Yeah, you just gonna fuck, you can just rip that off the side of somebody's heads if you want, like we joked about before, like ripping the little tags off a mattress. Just as illegal. Wow, it's surprisingly easy to rip off a human ear. Well, that's what we've learned so far today.

So anyway, he's gonna go to prison and I'm just gonna say this, judging by his mugshot he was never a good grandson. And it looks like he has a series of different marks on his forehead, which would lead me to believe he may have done a bunch of meth. I think so, or that could have been the cops wheeling on him as well.

That is also possible. That's up for debate, all right. Well, as we move forward, as we get out of the pandemic that we are currently in, again, be safe, get your vaccine if you can, airlines and flying. They're still going, those are still going. And I guess we're gonna start flying again soon.

Yes, I cannot wait. This is a really strange story, but I, you know, it kind of speaks towards people with weird compulsions. And I don't know why, like I don't, there is no motive for this that has been written out yet. So I wonder what going through this person's head. Marilyn Hartman, Bay Area's most prolific stowaway, arrested for the 22nd time.

This comes from the South San Francisco gate. This is a, she is a 69-year-old woman. A woman with a history of stowing away on airlines was arrested Tuesday for attempting to sneak onto a flight at Chicago's O'Hare International Airport. I don't even know how the fuck she does this. Yeah. This arrest comes two weeks after a judge rejected

a plea deal that would have given her probation for a previous attempt to stow away on a flight. This is very interesting. Hartman allegedly left the facility where she had been staying while on electronic monitoring. The device allowed Cook County Sheriff's Deputy to track her as she headed for O'Hare. Deputies activated an alarm in Hartman's device

as she neared terminal one where she was arrested. This is very, very strange. They're gonna seek a felony escape charge because she tried to break out of her little holding area. Interesting. Well, this reminds me. So this woman, she would sneak onto airlines and via stow away.

It reminds me of that story about Darius McCollum. Yeah, so he just kept stealing the buses. Yes, he has Asperger's and this was in New York City. He would steal city buses and steal city subways, but the thing was the trains ran perfectly. Yeah, he did it right. He would stop at all the stops. He loved it.

He just wanted, honestly, again, they should have hired him, but I wonder if it's difficult with somebody with that level if he has a mental disability. I think that he works when he wants to. Yeah. And when he wanted to work, he would just hijack subway trains, which is so scary to think about,

but it's the movie money train. It's the movie money train, but because Mr. McCollum was so focused on getting people to where they wanted to go in New York City, the trains ran better when he was the conductor. I don't know if the same is the case for this stowaway on these planes.

No, her first documented try was in February, 2014, when Hartman made it all the way through SFO security and onto a flight to Hawaii, which is honestly, if you're going to bust onto those, that's the one you bust onto, right? You get into the fucking, go to a vacation, right? Absolutely. And he was busted when the person who had the ticket

showed up to sit in the seat. Well, that will happen. That's an odd confrontation. Not only are you in the wrong seat, you are in the wrong plane, you are in the wrong airport, you should not be here whatsoever. Dude. That altercation, that must have been.

She's done this, then three days after that attempt, she tried again at SFO, getting stopped at the security checkpoint because she'd taken someone's discarded boarding pass. And then two months after that, she made it all the way onto a flight. In April, 2014, Hartman boarded a flight at Manetta San Jose International Airport,

landed at LAX, where she was apprehended. And now she's just been arrested constantly at Chicago area airport. She keeps just trying to go and then purposely getting arrested. Well, I think it's just gonna get more and more difficult for her as technology increases. And of course, she's been arrested 22 times.

So if you're an officer and you see her, I think you just kind of arrest her and assume she's trying to do something illegal immediately until proven otherwise. She already did it. She made it through one security checkpoint in 2019. I'm actually. But October, she was released from Cook County Jail

a year ago in an effort to prevent lowest detainees from contracting COVID-19. So they released her from jail. But I mean, now they're trying to, they're trying to put together a plea deal that will include mental health treatment because obviously she needs it. I mean, I think they just have to recreate

what it's like to wait in line for a plane. She seems to love waiting in security lines. It's the worst part of the whole process. I'm actually jealous of this woman. I think that what she can do is almost a cloaking superhero like power. I can't even go through security. Like when I was coming back from Uruguay,

they asked me if I had any illegal food and I'm such a fat fuck, I bought a bunch of snacks. Sure. But they really wanted, they wanted like pineapples and like fruit. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And like, did you bring a bunch of bugs back with you? And I'm like, no, I didn't do any of that.

I left them in Uruguay. But I was so nervous when they asked me if I brought food in that I said, no. And then I was basically stripped, searched and the whole thing. And then they were like, you brought snacks. And I was like, yes. And they said, that's fine.

I said, okay. You should have said something. I am just so much weaker than this woman who looks at the ultimate authority that we have in this country, which is the TSA. She looks them in the eye and actively lies. And my God, what a power she must have. I think that she is very mentally ill.

Yeah. But in like, again, that kind of, I don't even know if it's fun. It's compulsive because she is barely making it onto these flights. Technically, the system does vaguely work because they keep just stopping her and arresting her. But that's it.

Yeah. But it seems like they arrested her after the flight. But if she did have one tent, it seems like you would. Oh yeah. Blow it up during the flight. It just shows how the idea of permanent security is just a fantasy. It could be a lot of theater for nothing, indeed,

to make us all feel safe, aka, is it actually working? I never read the reports about all of the TSA stuff that gets through when they do their internal, like, let's see if we can get an axe through. You probably can. It's just like, fully, it's just an axe shape, just with Christmas wrapping all over it. And then the guy's just like, come on through, come on through.

Except for a fact that if you have one fucking weed roach in New York and they stop you. Oh my goodness. Nothing more. We're not going to talk about TSA stories a bunch here. But Carolina, of course, from No Dogs in Space, and Marcus's beautiful wife, she got detain, not detain, but she was forced to take off this little, beautiful, gold

grenade necklace from Canadian. It's a literal half an inch. It is a cute, little, beautiful, little, ooh, piece of jewelry. Yes, it was from Vera Meat in Brooklyn. And that was ridiculous. And I think the TSA just stole it. Oh yeah, and then I had, I've had a little knife taken from me.

Yeah, you're traveling with little knives? Well, I had a little tiny knife. Yeah, I did. Were you caught in a little tiny steak? Yeah, I wish. Why did you have all this? No, I had like, what's this putz? It was like one of those little,

I forgot what it was attached to. Flippity flappity. A little Flippity Flappity knife. I believe it. A little tiny little knife, because it was supposed to only be longer than your four fingers. That's when they used to stop you. And so, but the guy took it and he put it up against his hand

and it was just a little edge over the top. And I was just like, man. You have little hands. Listen, if I wanted to do vengeance, do you think I'd bring this tiny knife, man? I'd be strapped with C4, bro. Well, indeed. You hear my killdozer rumbling down the street, bro.

I'm just so happy you have no masculine abilities to do something like build a killdozer. Because honestly, Marv, again, going back to the documentary tread, psychotic break, but holy crap to that day, he built a fuck of a killdozer. He really took off. He put a lot of work into that. He could have just hung out inside of that

for a long time too, because he had TVs and everything. He was in there the whole time. He lived in there, he slept in there. It's kind of like the way we make people work here at LPN, where they're all sleeping inside of the studio, constantly whittling podcasts, whittling and whittling. They got the cables, they're making that by hand. Everything is done bespoke here at LPN.

Absolutely, that is true. Well, speaking of strange stories, this week's hero of the week is actually going to be a fantastic interview that I can't wait for you guys to hear about last week's hero of the week. This person, I almost think, can they can get it when it comes to hero of the week.

I have no idea what this means. But in Modesto, a person's been shoving forks through hot dogs and then just leaving them around neighborhood lawns. It sounds like it's just art. It sounds a bit like art, but did you ever fork, like if you have a teacher, did you ever fork their yard? You know where you buy a bunch of plastic forks

and you put them all in their yard and then they have to pick them all up. Is that just so we can watch you bend over again and again? No, we did not watch the teachers bend over, but we knew that they were going to wake up to a bunch of forks in their yard and then they would have to clean it up, which is a good two hours of work.

I remember pencils in the ceiling. No. That's what I'm talking about. I took it away from what you were talking about. That's from like welcome back cutter. There's, but we did. There was a pencil in the ceiling thing. I remember when people used to do that as a child.

But that's not attacking the teacher at their home. No, they put it up in the ceiling and someone's got to go up there and they got to go get it. No, the point that I'm trying to say is we were attacking the teachers at where they sleep, where that's how you really know. I know what we used to do is you break into their homes while they're sleeping and you tie them up

and then you call yourself like you wear animal masks and you do the strangers like head tilt at them. That's what we used to do. Yeah, well that reminds me of that great movie, You're Next, check that one out if you haven't seen it before. Oh, looking for the magic. I love that song. Oh, looking for the magic.

So in Modesto, California, a bunch of neighbors have found dozens of hot dogs skewered by forks. There's been no explanation. It's just art. This is art at its purest. No one's asking for it, but you didn't know that you wanted it until you get it.

However. Banksy. This, I'm just saying the word Banksy. Thank you, Banksy. Apparently there's many Banksy's I don't know and quite frankly. It's a team. I'm done caring. Isn't that interesting? I love him, but it's like, got you.

I love what you do. Thank you. But the Modesto police department, according to Sharon Baer of said police department, they were reports that they were poisoned hot dogs. What? And that would be bad. That's a, then he goes from here or the week

to bill another week. Exactly. Because dogs eat that. Dogs love hot dogs. Well, exactly. But apparently, according to Baer again, she says that there were no dogs located or reported to have been found sick,

which is really nice. So I think this might be someone trying to kill dogs. In which case, that's not a hero at all. You did this. I know. I'm sorry. I did a horrible thing. Wait a second. Are they poisoned or not?

Are these hot dogs poisoned? No, because no dogs were found sick and you know what dogs eat in that hot dog. But then why did this person say, I think the hot dogs are poisoned? Why did that person say that? Is it just baseless claims? Is this where we're at with fear in America?

Absolutely. You're also afraid? Yeah. Wow. So you mean once they're done using the COVID-19 fear to direct us to do whatever they want, do you think next is going to be fear of the tubed meat? Which these doctors are already trying to do

with their fucking little, oh, your cholesterol's high, Mrs. Abrowski. Well, that's something. I know what they're fucking doing. I know what big meat is trying to do. Well, that big meat is trying to get your doctor to shut the fuck up. Do you think maybe it's big chicken?

Like in the Kueh member Chick-fil-A? Yes. They have to eat more chicken. Those are the cows, though. It's the opposite. You are citing commercials that you saw on television. You old, old man. Please let me leave my house.

Anyway, according to Angelica Hernandez, a neighbor in the area told ABC 10, you know there's not a lot going on in this town. If this is ABC 10, pulled up with the news van. Jesus fucking Christ. Literally, we've had two shootings this week and the areas that you are talking about. This is huge.

This is important stuff. Dozens of these skewered hot dogs found on neighborhood lawns around Dimension Street. She says it was a strange sight and she had never seen that before. So this is apparently not something that happens constantly in Modesto. And here I say,

because it would make the news if it happened constantly, it'd just be a thing you know about Modesto. Oh yeah, Modesto, where the hot dogs are on forks. Yep, and also I must clarify, it's a bit of an older story here, but something that I think it's, I'm very happy. November 30th of 2020. Okay.

But not that old. So this scourge has already taken place and has already slid under the radar. 2020 was hard for everybody. And how do you have fun as a kid during COVID? You can't go to school anymore because God forbid you learn. You have got to do forks inside of tube meets,

lay them all over the neighborhood's lawn, neighborhood and neighbor's lawn. And then what you do is you drive by and you see them look at what you did. And you're just, yeah, that's like how serial killers go back to the scene of the crime and masturbate. It's the closest thing you can get to being a serial killer

and still making it on this show. I really think that this is, again, if this is an artist doing this, side stories, LPOTLGmail.com, we will speak with you about your motives. This is a group of shithead kids that we all hung out with. I hope so. Or it is someone just desperate,

truly trying to create some form of new physical meme. This could be from, this could be a TikTok based vandalism. I'm not quite certain. It could be. I was watching old WWE pay-per-views. And of course, in the signs, people hold, in the crowd, people hold signs up.

And isn't that just a meme? Isn't that just a meme? Oh, wow. Life from your grave. Henry, what else you got? Let's go to this story. We got some more grizzly stories to cover. Oh my God.

This story, by the way, I'm almost gonna say Gold Star Story. This is a fucking story. Because it's fricking brutal and sad. This comes from our favorite rag of the Daily Mail, read it from here. Oh, it's not news about crisps? No, not this time.

Louisiana Cannibal, 19, who learned gay men using grinder and planned to keep body parts as mementos. Trophies and food is indicted on federal hate crime, kidnapping and attempted murder. Chance Seneca, never name your kid Chance. I mean, I think Chance Seneca, it sounds like it's a super cool guy.

He can run real fast at track, but he's also, he also goes to the parties. Yeah, it sounds like a weatherman with a troubled past with a bunch of secrets. He's 19 years old, allegedly used gay hookup app, Grindr. Can anybody hook up on Grindr? I believe it is specifically for gay men.

And is the hoagie the one where we have sex with sandwiches? I can't believe you just did that. I can't believe you set me up for that and I fell right into that trap. And now I am drowning in horrific comedy. Now, in June of last year, he coaxed Holden White, who's the only other person I've ever seen named Holden besides Holden Caulfield,

to a Rand R. Holden McNally, to a residence in Lafayette. So this is kind of a scary, this is a scary story. This is really scary. And again, this happens to be the Grindr app, but these stories happen all the time. Oh, absolutely. Just be very cautious with these apps.

It's just hard. Be very safe. You gotta meet up with somebody on Skype first and figure out what they're doing, all right? So according to a statement released by the Department of Justice, Evident shows that Seneca attempted to kidnap three men by luring them to his home

after chatting with them on Grindr. Saying, gimme, gimme, I'm ready to gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, I got that stimmy. Now on June 19th, 2020, Seneca was successfully able to coax 18-year-old Holden White to a residence in the Lafayette Parish. But he was, it was a brutal, brutal attack. Apparently they went to hang out, they went to,

he said, come meet up with me because he survived. This dude survived. And apparently Seneca told him, we're gonna play video games at a relative's house. And he said that the next memory that he had was being pulled backwards by a cord and choked so hard. And if you look at the pictures of him in the gurney, you can see it broke all the blood vessels in his face.

And then he put him in a bathtub and stabbed him so many times and then attempted to cut off his hands. He tried to cut, he cut through his wrist so deep that his hands were nearly severed. And he stabbed him six times in the neck. There's something about, isn't it weird, like when I hear someone get stabbed through the hand,

I'm like, oh, that must hurt. The defensive wounds freak me out. But there's something about being stabbed in the neck too where I'm like, can you stab me in the back? I feel like getting stabbed in the back would feel less painful. Something with meat. But man, stabbing the neck six times.

We don't have that big of necks. How did you even do that? You just do it all over. You just do it again. It also depends on the, I mean, this is not being me, me being glib this time. This is me saying it depends on the size of the knife. Yeah, that's true.

And he apparently then he did all of this. He thought that he'd stabbed him. He had cut off, tried to cut off his hands. And then he called 911 on himself. Chance Seneca called 911, would it seem to be in a self-described effort to be put into a mental institution? Cause now Seneca is in state custody

and he pleaded not guilty to an attempted murder charge filed in Louisiana. But I think it's just because his public defender is trying to figure out how he's gonna do all of this shit. He's also facing a lot of extenuating circumstances when it comes to the, if he would be convicted because he's also looking at hate crime, legislation areas, also looking at hate crime violations,

kidnapping and firearm and obstruction charges. But with that hate crime popped on top of the attempted murder, you're looking at significant time. And dare I say this man desperately, desperately needs help. And God has survived because what a brutal, horrible moment for that poor man. And it's like how the Atlanta shooter

tried to change his motive last minute because he probably spoke to a lawyer trying to fucking carve some time off or whatever he would eventually get. When it's obviously a hate crime. But this story is gonna roll out a little bit more. Like this is gonna roll out. We're gonna figure out what the hell it's happening here.

But it is, he's obviously sick. He's aft up and he's not cool. No. And again, the media outlets, the teen who was attacked suffered from strangulation. But he's doing really good now. It looks like he's alive. He's got, he's really, this is gonna be a tough rehab. And hopefully he's not permanently brain damaged

with the lack of oxygen and stuff. He also had blunt force trauma to his head. And again, cut so deep in his wrists that his hands were nearly sawed off. Anyway, just please God be careful. And Chan, Seneca, yeah, you need to go away because obviously you don't belong in society. No, he just needs to.

But I guess in a fucked up way, if that is his like cry for help. That's not a, no it's not. I mean, no, it's obviously not excusable, but it is interesting to see him calling the cops immediately on himself afterwards and incriminating himself is very interesting. Which of course, again, not to get serious,

we'll save that occasionally serious on enabling its top end. But if we had a mental health facility where he could have walked in perhaps and said, I'm not feeling good. And then they would have said, okay, well, come on in. Let's see if we can't reach you. There are no beds. There are no beds at the end.

So I'm like, yeah. There are no beds. I mean, there was that other story, the I am Adam's mother. I forgot the documentary that came out about the idea of like kids with homicidal tendencies. Oh my God, those. HBO, it was wild. But again, it's just being like,

my son is ramping up his violence. He is getting more and more controllable. I need to put him in a facility. What do I do? There's no place to put him. Exactly. And if you want to have motivation to not procreate, check out Kids Who Kill.

Those documentaries are like real life Chuckies. They are the scary children. Psychopaths are the scariest. Oh yeah, because they have no control over their emotions. They don't know yet. They don't know that they are, because you know how many times people, guys have talked about who lived like in the gang life

for so long when they were younger. And then as they get older, they're like, I'm too tired to be that fucking up on my violence shit. It's exhausting. And there's a lot of, as a matter of fact, I forget the name of the charity, but there's a charity ran by former gang members that it's so cute because now they're just 50 year old dudes.

They're just like guys and they just do guy stuff. But they were in serious gang violence. But at some point you just grew out of it. Unfortunately in the gang life, oftentimes that means you get out with your life. I don't want to join a gang, Kissel. They don't want you. I don't want to join a gang.

Have you been recruited? Have you ever been recruited for a gang? There was one guy, honestly, I was approached by MS-13 and they asked if I would be their entertainment director. And I said, honestly, my plate is so packed right now. But if you guys can do, cause I will do this. I think it was PS-13. I think there was a public school.

Yeah, they wanted you to be their theater director. Even worse. With the MS-13 though, I did tell them, you guys can be really excited. I gave them a little of the seed of an idea and I hope you guys can join in. MS-13 Cruise. They're doing an MS-13 cruise.

I think it's going to be really amazing. Again, though, if you are a Crip and you do buy a ticket, there is a special, there's a special Lido deck for the other gangs. You just understand so much about gang culture. Me, man. It's me, buddy. All right.

Well, you know, getting paid is fun, especially if you've owed money or if you're owed money. However, this story, this one just makes me upset because there was this person, Andrea Flattens. So she was owed some money because she used to work at AOK Walker Luxury Auto Shop. OK. And who owed her money?

Well, apparently it was this final check from AOK Walker Luxury Auto Shop. That's what she wanted. But she was paid in the middle of the night with thousands of dollars worth of pennies and a little love note. Not just were they pennies, but they smelled funny because they were covered in oil.

I tell you what, man. I would freak out this. That's called real psychological warfare. That is horrible. This is how you get Stephen Paddock. My mom did this. My mom did this. She would pay you in pennies?

No, my mom. I remember my mom. There was I forget what went down. She did this. It was brilliant. There are things that my mom does. The type of psychological warfare she used to commit to is just like I could only wish

I could grow to that level. I could see it. She had to deal with the bank. I forget what it was. She owed him a certain amount of money. I forget this. And she was so pissed. I don't know if anybody still does this anymore.

Does anybody else have the big water jug filled with change in their house? Because my grandmother had it for fucking forever. And then we inherited. It's just like an old, literally like an office water jug just filled with change. And my mom did that shit where she fucking took it to the bank. And she said, here's my cash.

And literally just gave it to them. Well, they have the coin machine. Oh, yeah, but they all sit there as the line built up behind her, as they're sitting there putting it through the coin machine. And she just sit there, arms crossed, the biggest Mussolini-wide smile on her face. Your mother is a valued customer.

And she deserves to be treated with a little bit of GD respect around here. That's what she laid down the law. Well, apparently Andrea, she left this employment, or she left this job at the luxury auto shop because of, quote, a toxic working environment. Oh, I bet. I do have to agree with her because she

blames for this penny stunt, Miles Walker, who is the owner of the shop. Mm-hmm. Oh, yes. That is a very, the furious small business owner, reeks of this. You know what I mean? Absolutely.

And according to Serena Wandersee, who worked under Miles before, she says, well, working for him, he was my manager. And then she says, pardon my language. But he said, you think you have a bigger dick than any of the boys? Well, we're going to approve that right now. And he decided to deep pants me in the lobby.

And he thought it was funny. That's not funny. Never pants your employee. Never do that. So apparently, people were quite upset. So this guy, I can see Miles Walker. He runs an auto shop. He's like the father from Drop Dead Gorgeous.

If you haven't seen that movie, highly recommend it. It's not available anywhere on streaming for some reason. No kidding. It's one of those movies they just pulled. Just the most annoying manager at an auto shop, just being like, you don't got a big dick. And then he pulls your pants down. Oh, I would be.

This man is the epitome of a douchebag. And then with the penny trick. So if you can just walk, just drive by and make fun of Miles Walker, not saying Dachshund or anything, but AOK Walker Luxury Auto Shop. Seems like a waking nightmare. Go. And just don't tell him to go fuck himself.

Be like, hey, I'll show you my dick. And start going over there and pulled on your pants in front of the store. Yeah, absolutely. And can we get legal trouble? Well, Walker, no. Absolutely not. Go do that.

Yeah, Walker can get in legal trouble because he's such an asshole. Apparently, they were actually an investigation on all these pennies. So CBS 46 reporter, Jamie Kennedy, I know he's falling far. I'm just joking, nothing wrong with being Jamie Kennedy. He's fine, he's fine.

Or a CBS 46 reporter. But they asked Mr. Walker about the pennies. They say, may I ask you about the pennies? Do you know anything about them? And he says, I know tons about it. What's wrong with it? And he goes on to say, so then Jamie asked, so you dropped the pennies over at the person's house.

And he says, I don't know if I did that or not. I don't really remember. He's a fucking asshole. This guy is a fucking piece of shit. He also said, it doesn't matter. He got paid. That's all that matters. He's a fucking weenie for bringing it up.

He's a weenie. He's a weenie. Well, these are fighting words. You know what? They should schedule a boxing match. It seems like they should. And apparently everyone involved in the story are, is a man, is a man.

Yeah, everybody is a man. It is all a man. But he called him a weenie. And then he said, because he is, and because you give him a platform, I just told you exactly what I had to say. You guys are what's wrong with the world. Get the fuck off my property.

This dude is a psycho. He runs his business like a king. Like a moron. He is a moron and a absolute. He's just going to get himself killed by someone in a killdozer. That's what's going to happen to this guy. There's going to be a strange comeuppance.

We're going to hear in the news like shop owner dead. And then everyone's going to be like, oh no, what happened? And then we're going to hear the full story. And the only time in American history where this person who kills this other store owner, they're going to get off because every single person in that jury has had a boss like this guy named Walker. And they're just going to applaud him.

And they're going to say, I'm sorry to inconvenience you. And thank you for ending this man. But the thing is, it's also going to start to narrow down who his clientele is because there will be people that will read that new story and go like, hell yeah. And that's where they'll only place them, where they'll take their car. And then it's going to become a whole culture war

around that place of like, oh, so you go there? We don't go there anymore. No, don't go there. There has to be other places other than the one that is owned by that complete and utter jackass. Or did this next story we want to cover real quick is absolute? This is, again, one of those is going to unfold over the next couple of days.

And it's very, very interesting and very fucked up. This story about a guy named Sean Lennon. Yes. Not Sean Lennon because they keep looking and it keeps reading. My brain keeps making a Sean Lennon and Sean Lennon. No, as far as we know, Sean Lennon has not killed anyone. I mean, he's probably seen deaths that he's never

told anyone that he's seen. Poor kid. But this story, this comes from KOB4. Prosecutors say suspect and son, poor deaths admitted to killing a total of 15 people in New Mexico. This is Sean Lennon, basically. Jesus. And he murdered a man with a hammer.

He beat a man to death with a hammer in New Jersey. The body of Michael Dubkowski was discovered in his New Jersey home just south of Philly after a welfare check. Now, this Sean Lennon is linked to this murder. When he arrested him, he confessed to 16 more murders. We have a straight up serial killer. And yes, possibly. But it sounds like this shit was kind of motivated

by various, there are motives here. It seems like this original crime that he did and then combined with the possible murder of his wife and her friends. And then another 10 people, there seems to be weird, connected, intricate motives. This comes from the CBS News. He is now the, he was the primary suspect.

He came from New Mexico, Albuquerque, New Mexico. Local law enforcement officials in New Mexico and in New Jersey are working with federal agents on the veracity of claims by Sean Lennon, including that he killed 11 other people, despite including the four people they now are connecting him definitely to. Authorities said in court documents at Lennon, 47, made the admission in a phone call to a relative

who told investigators he expressed remorse. The case started on March 5th, when the bodies of Lennon's ex-wife and three other people were found in a vehicle in a parking garage at Albuquerque International Sunport, New Mexico's largest airport. It's not clear how they were killed. Three of them were reported missing in January from grants about 80 miles west of Albuquerque.

The victims were identified as Jennifer Lennon, his wife, who's 39, Matthew Miller, Justin Mata, and Randall Apostolan. They said that the four bodies that were found at the airport, one definitely was killed in Albuquerque, and the other three, which was his wife, was definitely killed in Albuquerque previously, and that the other three appeared to have been killed

in the grants area of Sabola County, right? So he'd left this, essentially he just left a car at the airport, got on a plane, went to New Jersey, on March 8th, three days after the remains were found in New Mexico, the body of Michael Dupkowski was found. He was beaten to death with a hammer, and then he was immediately arrested. Then he was charged with multiple counts.

So the first murder of his wife and three other people, that was in Albuquerque. That was in Albuquerque? Hops on a plane, goes to Jersey, kills this guy with a hammer. It does seem like he has a plan. It seems like he's Buscemi, it seems like he's from Happy Madness, or Billy Madison,

looks like he has a list of names that he is crossing off, and the question is, is he telling the truth? We don't know. When he says, I killed 16 other people? Well, apparently it sounds like he set up a story of what happened to his wife. So he told friends that his wife, Jennifer, had run off with some friends, possibly Arizona.

That never happens, never happens. Never happens, no one's running off to Arizona. Nobody does, and everybody says it here, like it doesn't sound right, because she was a mom, and I don't think she was just gonna blow off her kids, right? And then apparently people kept saying they don't understand what happened with Dupkowski. According to neighbors, he said he was

a real good guy from what I could tell, he's a total shock what happened to him. But according to Sean Lannan, he told investigators that Dupkowski, who he beat to death with a hammer, had sexually abused him as a child, and that he had gone to the home to retrieve sexually explicit photos. But apparently that there is a connection,

because Dupkowski mentored Lannan and his twin brother through a Big Brother's program in the 1980s. But people don't really understand, people are confused, like Lannan's family's confused, because he's been there a couple of times, like Dupkowski has been to family celebrations, which does not necessarily mean he's innocent of molesting him as a boy,

but it does speak to like, they had like a functioning relationship. So either something boiled over, and he finally decided now was the time that I'm gonna fucking pop off and get everybody, nobody who ever never believed me, I guess, or is he just an absolute psychopath who's just became completely unhinged?

He might just be trying to set up his defense as well. I mean, who knows? You never know, I'm definitely not going to, I'm going to not side with the guy who killed four people before killing the person that then he alleges molested him. Oh yeah, I don't know, it seems a little muddy. There's a lot going on in it.

But in, you know, obviously these stories are real, Chris Whitman, who is the brother of Jennifer Lannan, he says it's a challenging time. He added, just getting news today that he confessed to a total of 16 murders, it's mind-boggling, he talks about, he says they were together for about nine years, and it's just mind-boggling because it's someone

I welcomed into my home, we had Thanksgiving dinner together, and someone I know has taken my sister's life and tragically potentially 15 others. So it is just, it is so sad when these things happen, and that is just why it's harder and harder sometimes to believe in love. It is, and I also-

Because you're just like you were together for nine years? But how do you- You're just gonna kill me and all of my friends? This is a weirdly serious question. How do you begin to tell your family that I'm having homicidal thoughts? Like, what do you do to stem this behavior? You gotta go to therapy.

I mean, yeah, of course, but you know, there's still things you don't even tell your therapist, because it's like really weird. Well, if it's felonious and you're actively licking a gun, that's what- They might report you. It would be good for you to figure out a way to like, how do you tell other people that I'm going through this thing?

I'm going through the, I am scared of myself. There has to be ways that he could have reached out. Can you just like, can there be like a type of flare gun you shoot that says like, I'm having severe psychological problems, and that's how it just can come. Cause sometimes you just need to be taken against your will to a place and then you go like,

thank you for putting me in that cell. I was about to murder a lot of people. I'm calm now. Like, wouldn't that be nice? Like calm.com. You ever used to do commercials for them? Yes. Again, I think what we're talking about is mental health facilities that were all shut down

in the 80s that potentially could have helped. And just- But think about all the golf courses we have. I know. And how nice is that? When you think about relaxing around sociopaths, it's just like being in the Looney Bin. Whitman said of regarding his sister who died, I'm just going to miss her laugh and her sense of humor.

So it is so sad. These are real people. And this guy, if you look at the picture of him, the scary thing is- He's got a good mug. Yeah, he did a good mug face face, mug shot face. He's got a mug shot face, but he looks like someone. You just walk past on the street

or walk past an ace or Home Depot. That is, that's why the mug shot is always interesting. Sometimes you see a guy and you're like, he's convicted of jerking off 18 ducks. And you look at the mug shot and you're like, all right. Yeah. Yeah, definitely. Yeah. He's jerking off ducks.

He's jerking off ducks. But this guy- Like, what was it? The guy who had sex with Olaf last week. You're like, yes. It checked out. Yeah. This guy, he kind of looks a bit like Chris Watts, I guess, but he just, again, looks-

Chris Watts, again, just a normal looking ass, dude. Normal looking guy. Instead of just walking around, you don't understand that what his face is, is the fragile mask of a mass murder. And if he was molested, again, that's absolutely horrible. And we take that very, very serious. Of course, but murder is never acceptable unless,

I mean, pitch it to me. You got to have a strong pitch. You got to have a strong pitch. And the person that you're murdering, if they, okay, so this is how it works. In order to secure peace, you got to prepare for war, okay? So sometimes you've got to kill someone because you know that person's going to kill

a hundred other people. So by killing that person, you've just saved lives. But you need proof. Evidence. Yes. That's important. The main thing is gather evidence. They're going to blow up,

they're blowing up SoFi Stadium and I know that. So to save all of those lives at this Rams game, I'm going to kill that person. I think that's great. But you need some pictures. You need some receipts. You need some emails. You're going to have to hack in there.

You're going to. You're going to have to hack into their stuff. And that is, so I would say yes, if you're going to do, so learn light espionage first. And then try desperately to get away with it because the way our legal system works, believe it or not, they're still going to be mad at you. There's everyone going to be like,

oh, murder is bad, murder is a game. He was going to blow up SoFi Stadium so technically I'm a hero. And that, but he didn't do it yet. As they'll say to you, oh, but they didn't do it yet. Did Richard Reed blow up the plane? No. But he had some fancy shoes, didn't he?

Yeah, made by the FBI. Life from your grave. All right, now it's time for a conversation with Hunter Barker. Hunter Barker was last week's hero of the week. And I'm going to say this week's hero of the week is a man named Nick Montanio, I believe, who owns the Los Terros Mexican restaurant.

So he is this week's hero of the week. But this is the guy who sat in the beans. This is the guy who sat in the beans. So this is Hunter Barker, enjoy our conversation, unbelievably sweet guy. And we're building it out here. We love our characters here on Side Story. So enjoy our combo with Hunter Barker,

hero of last week and this week. Sure. All right, everyone. Now it is time for hero of the week. And this week we are revisiting the hero from last week. We got him. And we are talking beans. Talking big ol' sloppy, drippy beans.

Oh, I can't wait. This man is an absolute hero. He helped save Los Terros Mexican restaurant. He is a stuntman. And I can't wait to talk about what it's like to sit in beans for 24 hours. Hunter Barker, thanks for being on the show, Hunter. Well, yippee-ki-yay, gentlemen.

What an honor it is to be here. Wow. Hell yeah. Now, because you have listened to your stuntman. Looks clean, by the way. You are clean. I thought there would still be some bean residue on you, but you are completely bean free.

There's still a few beans and a few different cracks and crevices, but we can get to that. I would love to talk to you as a person that has also been submerged in an oily substance. I was once, we've talked about it endlessly, on last podcast in the left-hand side stores. I once spent several days absolutely slathered in peanut butter for a show that I did called

Your Pretty Faces Going to Hell. And I know that the one thing that affected me the most about sitting in that peanut butter was that the smell of the peanut oil would not leave me, or just my, I would just smell in peanuts for like a month. Elephants were following him everywhere he went. It was ridiculous. A bunch of chihuahuas.

Now you did this, I'm not gonna call it, technically it was a stunt, but actually it was a piece of, this was a political movement. This was Yoko Ono and John Lennon laying in a bed in 2021, who needs those two talentless hacks? When we have Hunter Barker, a man who can sit in Beans Hunter, I've gotta ask you, yes, as Henry was alluding to,

do you still smell like beans? Guys, please excuse my language, I smell like shit. Mm-hmm, hell yeah I did. Very good, I like pure honesty. But how did you- How did you, did you shit in the beans? Well, so that was one of the big questions that we got. Leading the stunt all up around it, you know,

what I did is I actually had fabricated a funnel for myself, and that did attach to my Johnson, so that's how we took care of number one. Number two was a different scenario. I used a, it's called a modium, it's like an over the counter. Yeah, yeah. So I popped about 12, 18 of those.

So you were juicing? That's performance enhancing drugs. He's a real Sammy Sosa. Yes, yes, yes. And to go back to, you know, your question, you know, is this a stunt? This was one of the biggest stunts of my life. Yeah, go from the beginning.

How did you conceive this stunt? What made you say like- I wanna know about the modium. We will get to the modium, but I do, let's start with the creative spark, and then we'll move to where the shit goes. Okay. Okay, so let's start at square one.

Me and my family have been going to Los Toros forever. I'm 27 years old, I've been going for over 20 years. Los Toros, if you live in the Chatsworth area, they are famous for their bean dip. It is wildly addicting. So addicting to the point, it'll drive a man completely insane. It's that good.

That's unbelievable. That's actually very scary. A little stuff. Their margaritas are also great too. And I had more than a few of those in the tub as well. Their main margarita, Papa Nick's margarita, named after the owner, Nick, is one of the most knock you on your ass,

amazing margaritas you will ever have in your life. All right, well, I love the menu items, but okay, so you're slamming margaritas. I can't stop thinking about the modium and the shit. And it just seems to me like you have got to be constantly dumping in the beans. Gentlemen, the entire week leading up, I had to change my diet completely.

You know, it was typically a mixture of a lot of red meat. I have a high red meat count. I had to push that down, eating only greens. And then the day before greens, a modium, greens, a modium, what carried me 24 hours from start to finish, not a single duty or drop in sight. All right.

Okay. Good thing, all right. Are you satisfied? I just had to know that, Mr. Zabrowski. Now, when you decided I'm going to sit in these, like how did you decide I'm going to sit in the beans? I can handle this amount of beans. And also, was it beans from Los Toros

or did you pipe in other beans? Good point. Great question, great question. And we, I have a story for that. So Los Toros, there is no way I could submit myself to 24 hours in their beans. Because back to the question regarding the duty, my plan would have been completely soiled,

no pun intended there. So what I did was prepared my own batch of beans and I do have to shout out L-Ray Del Free Hole beans. Okay, great. Great family. And coincidentally enough, I went to the grocery store to collect my beans for the mixture that I would be making

for the stunt for Los Toros. And I have not met the family who produces the L-Ray Del Free Hole beans completely random. So what we did was I, we had in the frame the bag of beans behind. So after the stunt was, went live, I got a message online from the daughter of the family, her name is Genesis.

And she says, I can't believe this. My father's beans have gone viral online. Here's the photo of the L-Ray Del Free Hole beans. And I said, I said, Genesis, this is the most beautiful thing I've ever heard in my life. Yeah, it's wonderful. And she says, no, no, no, no.

Like this has made my father's life. He is laughing his ass off. And he would like to give you guys free beans for a year. Wow. And I was like, Genesis, I think that's, it's so kind, but I think it's a bad idea to give them to me again. Let's do something charitable with these beans. Yeah.

That's great. How many beans did you have to buy? Because looking at the picture, we are looking at slightly larger than a kiddie pool. No, it was a lot of beans. A lot of beans. And it looks to be about a four inch deep pile of beans. What are we talking here?

And why weren't you arrested for buying that many beans? It seems like someone who's about to commit a terrorist act involving a series of blown up baked beans. Yes, I did clear the shelf of the L-Ray Del Free Hole beans. Now, did you just choose them because of consistency? Now, as a stuntman, you looked at this, you wanted to set this up in a way scientifically because a lot of times beans,

refried beans specifically are very thick. How do you get them up to a runny enough texture that you can really wade around in it? Yeah, did you do laps? Did you swim at all? Yeah, I did dunk myself in for a little bit for a refreshing dip after the end of the night at around hour 5.30 in the morning.

Great. Well, can also emotionally, 24 hours is a long time to do anything. Right, to do anything. So when you went, what was the hardest chunk of time? Like, did it get to, but like, did you have people hanging with you the whole time or like the people like joking

when you were drinking and having a good time of like as it was going? Or were you like, were there some points where people were like, Hunter, I gotta go. And then everyone just like left you alone in the beans? The alone time in the beans must have been hard. So the most difficult parts were the beginning and in nearing the end.

You know, the beginning is because I'm getting used to this. I'm acclimating to the beans all around me and the substance all around me. And the middle was really, really great because what I thought was so special were that all the families in the area would drive up and with their kids in the car waving and laughing. Oh, this is awesome.

And it really touched me in many ways. Yeah, of course. But that being said, guys, I mean, talking about the 24 hours, I did want to give a little bit of a speech because I am so gracious and so honored to receive this award. It's the first award I've ever received in my life.

It's not an even tangible or fun. This is the original NFT. Yeah, I mean, it's amazing and it's worth so much. But I do have to pass this award to the owner of Los Toros, Nicholas. Wow, a real hero. I have to be right back. He's a real hero. He is.

Because I'm just a messenger. I'm just a guy who sat 24 hours in a tub of beans. For the last year, when the world took away, he gave. And he has been feeding people all throughout the year. Even on hard times, Nicholas has been feeding first responders, feeding nurses, people in the community, which to me, I thought was just so fantastic

and so amazing. Yeah. But look, so I do have to give pass the award to Nicholas Montagno, the owner of Los Toros. All right. Nicholas Montagno, Montagno. Yes, yes. Nicholas Montagno, hero of the year.

Hero of the year. Wow. Honestly, especially for the Chatsworth area, if we're going to do regional hero of the year. Without a doubt. So just to follow up on that very wonderful, salient, deep, sensitive, creative, great point. Did you get a bean in your pee hole at all?

Did any beans go up your asshole? Any asshole or pee hole? This is a general question we just know. Our fans needed to know before we give you a like a plug. Yeah, did you like piss out a bean or anything in your nostril, anywhere inside of your body? No beans, but a little bit of margarita on the rocks. Amen.

That's how it goes. Right around the rim. Wow. It goes crystal goblets. And gentlemen, not only that, I'm not finished with the speech here. Oh, yeah, go, go, go. I didn't want to come on here like a sad sack of beans.

I really did want to come with some thunder as well. And what I would like to propose to you guys is a challenge for you. Oh, my gosh. And I would like to do for you guys. And so I thought this would be kind of interesting. I thought for 24 hours, I would listen to last podcast on the left uninterrupted for 24 hours straight

and then give you guys the stipulation where I will do that wherever you'd like me to do it and how you would like me to do it. OK. Oh, my goodness. It's a lot of power. Doesn't need to be decided here. It could be a week.

You can speak to the audience. Maybe they have some ideas. But I'd like to give you guys that as I'm so thankful for this award. Honestly, dude, you don't understand what kind of that. That's a huge gift. And I do believe that. And we will pause that to our listeners.

What should we do? 24 hours of last podcast on the left. Hunter Barker is going to be sitting there. We're going to find a public space for you to do it. We're going to figure out where we're going to drive up funds towards. And it's not going to be just guns for kids. No, it will not be, although that will definitely

be added to the list of guns for kids. I love that. More guns for more kids. Do you need to have something food related in this challenge? Is it something where you want to sit in case? So what do you want to sit in the most? I think the challenge is listening to the episodes. And then we've got to find a way for him.

Because he's already said he's already done this sitting in. I hope the challenge isn't listening to the episode. I hope the challenge is when he's standing on like one foot in a pile of peacock shit or something. Listening to the podcast is just a cherry on top of the creamy delight. And you guys need to figure out what that delicious morsel is. It doesn't need to be food at all.

It could be anything else. I mean, it's almost like he hopes it isn't food. It's almost like it's going to have to be food then. Yeah. Sorry, Hunter. Well, that is just fantastic. And thank you so much for that. Is there a plug?

Is there anything you want to go towards? Do you want anybody? Is there a website or anything? You're shelling as long as it's not just human growth home-worn. I mean, plug in the set. I mean, whatever you guys. So my plight is to do these stunts for small businesses.

I love it. That is my plight. That is my mission. That is my journey. So if there's anything that you guys can, and I love creating the stunts inspired by what the small business is, again, this is my gift to you guys. Listening to the podcast for 24 hours straight uninterrupted

is just the cherry on top. So that is not the challenge. I'm leaving the challenge up to you. All right, Hunter, you're going to have to give us some time. We're a little bit backed up here. But we'll figure it out at some point. And perhaps even if we're in your neck of the woods, maybe we can try to tie in some show stuff.

Honestly, that would be pretty sweet. Dude, anybody can anybody find you anywhere on socials? Do you like that? Yes, so my Instagram is hunter the godfather. Ooh, I love it. All right, Hunter. Well, honestly, this is a very inspirational talk. This is why you were here the week,

but now passed on to Nicholas Montagno. But honestly, thank you so much for your time and for your strength. And a challenge will be coming your way. Also, I got to ask, did you eat any of the beans? Did you have a little spoon or doll? Did you eat the beans? Because I think I would have had a nibble or two.

He's not a Japanese TV star. Well, I don't know. Did you eat any beans? I did eat some beans, of course. What would I be if I didn't? And also, I did have a couple meals at the end of the evening. I couldn't resist. The food is that great.

Oh, man, that's incredible. So Los Toros was still feeding you as you were sitting in the beans? Of course. That is fantastic. And you can still eat beans, no bean remorse. I will be going back tonight. That is what I'm talking about.

Hunter Barker, hero we needed. I didn't know we needed. I honestly, I'm hungry for beans now. Like I want some refried beans. I'm going to get that tonight. Absolutely. And then I have to ask also, when you were out of the beans, you stand up, you're out of the beans.

Obviously, you're covered in beans. What happened to the rest of those beans? Did you feed them to cats or did you throw? That's a lot of beans. Yeah, so those are in a very safe place in my power range. You've had the beans. Very safe. All right.

Well, Hunter Barker, he is a fantastic hero. He is. Life from your grave. All right, there it was. That was great. So if you do have a good pitch for what Hunter Barker should do. Well, you know I'm thinking queso. We are thinking queso, but it's going to be queso.

I kind of, if it is queso. OK, true question, Henry. He's sitting in a vada queso, right? Hunter, he's handsome man. Yeah, sure, sure, sure. You looked clean. How far away from his body would you dip a chip to get that queso? And I'm talking, we're not going to put him in tostitos.

No, we're putting him in Texas queso. Real queso. It's going to burn his body because it's full of jalapeno. Is it weird to say this is where there's a double standard? Really? That if it was a beautiful woman. Well, I see there was a strip club in New York. I would walk by all the time.

And at noon, you can go eat sushi off of a stripper's body. Absolutely. You go to work. You look at our accountant in your lunch. You go and eat sushi off a human body like a Jeffrey Epstein. That's a lot. Oh, I love tuna off of a butt. Because then you get a slight warmth.

I honestly, I don't know why as a man, for a man, only just because it's because they're also even looking at him. He's not even my type in even that respect. OK. Because you have to, I don't know. It's quite handsome. Sure. But still, I don't know why it's like the double standard.

If it was a woman, I'd be like, yeah, I'll try it. But you're not going to eat the chip. No. I would have no problem going with the corner dip. I would go with the corner dip. But that's because you're more advanced than me. Well, you know how hard it is to mix around the queso. I think most of that corner dip will be safe.

Congeals. It will congeal. And I will take some of the skin. I'll take some of the skin from the very top, because you know that's safe. But I don't know what floats up. And also to have to, Hunter would need to shower. He need to wash up.

Yes, of course. And also, as we learned from our interview, he does have a piss contraption. And he actively said he did not shit. So I would need to know had he urinated yet. If he had urinated, I'm going to go even further away from him. How big's the pool a queso? Exactly.

All right. Well, either way, Hunter, thank you so much for being on the show. And side stories, LPOTL at gmail.com. At some point in the not so distant future, which could be 100 years from now, if you think about time, we will do something with Hunter. And we will use his unbelievable talents

for some kind of greater good that we don't quite know yet. Yep. As a matter of fact, what if he sat in a bunch of 1,000 oily pennies? Ooh. That's gross. All right. It depends on what we're working towards.

Yeah. We did get a mail from someone that said that plesophilia is a thing. You have to read that email, buddy. I'm sorry. You have to. This is a listener email. I have plesophilia, and I'm a woman.

I can say that when I do use my stuffed animal for sexual purposes, I have one specifically for my needs. The others are just because I adore them. It doesn't get very wet at all. Guys ejaculate come. Girls don't always release the fluid. Sounds weird, but didn't know how else to describe it. My stuffed animal stays quite clean, and I do wash him,

but moisture has never really been an issue at all. Ben, I think guys would get a stuffed animal more dirty or wet than a girl would. Thank you. My stuffed animal stays in my collection, and no one has ever known about my fetish, has ever figured out which one I use. So just go around and smell all of your friend's stuffed

animals, and it smells like balls or a vagina. You know what, just like. Just ask them if they're fucking it. I just want to know if you're. Henry, right now, are you fucking any stuffed animals? No. I'm just going to believe you, even though you said it in a way that makes me not believe you.

I just feel like the funniest part about that email was when she said, men come, and women don't really ejaculate, and she's like, sorry for being gross. It's like, that's normal. That's actually not that gross. That is a normal thing that you said. It was you fucking all of one of the adults in the collection. Now we're hitting the fucking tricky waters.

I can't say that it's not demonizing. We can't say, we can't, we can't yuck her yum. I'm not yucking her yum, Mr. Zabrowski, and I love this woman. I love this woman. I am just saying it is, it, what, yeah. Try to make a sentence. Try to make a sentence that string together some words.

Does she buy a bunch of plushies that enjoy being cucks? Because my understanding is she's only fucking one of them. And if I am one of these plushies on the shelf, if I'm like the Stimpy Doll that farts, and all of a sudden all I get to see is like, my friend Raggedy Ann go get banged out by her owner, and I'm just standing there like, I guess I don't get fucked by the owner.

Yeah, you're always the stuffed animal in the corner being told how small your dick is, and how much greater the other plushie's dick is. Yeah, that's a lot of, that's a lot, unless you're really into it. Man, I did stumble upon a JOI, that's a jerk-off instruction video. I know those.

She was so mean. Yeah, and you're just being like, you're honestly, now I'm insulted. No, I don't, you're saying a bunch of accurate things. I think the guys that like to be demeaned tend to like actually be, like they tend to be like shvelte. And then they like to be like, you're a bad naughty boy,

but they're actually buff. Like if you call me like a bad fatty boy, I'm just, I just get- You're really, that hurts. That's offensive. I'm upset. No, I actually, we've had a lot of messages, people saying that honestly,

they don't see a distinct difference between people that are like, you don't see, it's not just like executives who are subs. It's like most people, it's like all over the place. Oh, absolutely. But there is, you know, but every once in a while, you do know for a fact that Don the fucking junior eats a pile of shit, and he's just like,

thank you mommy, thank you mommy. He's got to, and of course, Kimberly Guilfoyle, what a mommy she is, question though to you, Henry, now that I am becoming more broad, and thank you for broadening my mind, like the intro of round table of gentlemen, is it any different fucking this doll that she has or this plushie toy?

Is it any different than a flashlight? Oh, absolutely not. I guess that's- Absolutely not. And we talk about people fucking- Absolutely not, no. I don't think so. The only thing is, what if like her-

It's more like, are you in a full on relationship with the plushie, then it gets to the whole point, then it gets into like, we're talking about like insurance issues. Of course, but then also, it's just, I also think a flashlight isn't on a shelf next to a series of other flashlights that your friends might look in and grab it.

You don't know that. Because then they have the specialized flashlights. They got the, you know, I believe Asia, what's her name? Carrera? No, not her. It was before the other one. Okay.

She's got one. Aza. Aza has one? She's got one, I believe. I don't know if Sasha Gray had her own pussy, like her own fake pussy. I don't know. Did Jameson had her own fake pussy?

Well, and she had her own fake butt also. All I know is when it comes to the flashlight, it would be nice if they actually put a little flashlight in there. It would be nice just to have it like, just so you could put the cap on and it's got a flashlight and then you can hide it and it's also convenient.

Also, if there's a home intrusion and you're like, all you have is not a gun, but a flashlight, flashlight, then all of a sudden you're like, who are you when they're looking at the pussy? And then you're like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Oh my God, what's going on here? That's scary.

All right, well thank you so much for that. Listen to her email. Anything else, Henry? I have this one. This was one of those, so we talk about these like, the people talking business and like business seminars and trust building exercises. Oh my God, sounds like a freaking nightmare.

So I got a chills when you guys started to describe some of the tactics used during the seminar, including the five survivors on a boat thing. I was forced to go to a camp when I was 13 years old and we were forced to do this exercise. We were given five popsicle sticks and then all a hundred of us were put into a circle while you walked around the room

and one at a time had told each person that you chose not to give them a vote for the life raft and to tell them, you die. Keep in mind, everyone here is ages 12 to 17 years old. When it was my turn to walk around the room and condemn all of these people to an artificial death, I only gave four of my five popsicle sticks away. I kept one for myself because I don't wanna die, ha ha.

This prompted one of the facilitators to pull me aside and scold me that this was against the rules. What? So I ended up giving the last stick away. Did you not see the end of the movie Titanic? You gotta take care of yourself. Of course. After the exercise ended,

they revealed the point of the ordeal and it was to scold us for not caring for ourselves and that none of us voted for ourselves to live. He voted for himself. And I just about lost my shit at this point. The same facilitator pulled me aside and said later that I almost ruined the exercise because she naturally did it.

It's a stupid exercise. I went to Camp Luther and I had a horrific memories of Camp Luther and but there was some fun in there. Did some archery, did a lot of sleeping, stayed up all night. Oh yeah, dude. And at one point, this is another weird story

from that weekend. At one point we were blindfolded and given rolled up towels to beat the shit out of some beanbag chairs and we were told to imagine they were beating our parents. Honestly, that could help. That could help. And I have one more.

This is about this period controversy. I'm not talking about Monarch. Oh my God. I'm talking about periods. We are talking about the double space- Punctuation. Punctuation period that lit up social media. I can't believe how it trained it.

I graduated college May 2020 with a degree in writing, editing and publishing. And as I'm sure you can imagine, we had many a debate over this exact thing. The official ruling according to the Modern Language Association is that there should be only one space following a period. In typed words.

It should be noted however that this change has come with the digital age. Typewriters necessitated a double space following a period to make it easier for the reader to read but computers can space outwards more effectively now, making the double space redundant. Well, what was I taught? Why did I fail?

Why were those papers full of red marks? I want a redaction of every single thing that I was told was wrong when I was a child. Don't trust anyone. Don't trust the authorities. They're gonna move the goalpost as soon as they want to. And next thing you know, you're not getting work because you're double spacing

because you thought that was the patriotic thing to do. Yep. And now it's racist. And now it's horrible. Well, what's the point of even going to kindergarten? I feel like kindergarten honestly is a waste. I don't think it should go to school until they're 15 years old. You know what I do?

And they should be in the military up until then. Well, then you want child sort of a soldier. You should feel a child. But you understand, that's like Coney. It's service for the children. I don't mind the concept. You don't want, what? Just camps. Camp.

Camps. Isn't that weird how camp sounds, but if you say camps. Everybody, oh, that's kind of a big problem. Anyway, all right, everyone. Never trust your teacher. That's basically what that means. Trust your teacher.

Live every day like you are. You're the main plushie. And everybody, they all want to fuck you. They're not trying to fuck old Berenstein, Mr. Bear over there. They're not trying to fuck old Snakey the Snake over there. They're trying to fuck you. Cocky the cockroach, which is a cockroach stuffed animal. All right, and you got to love how many times you make,

you're the owner of, you make them gush. And maybe, oh, you're like, oh, well, you know, the other plushies, they say they don't get wet when she uses me, but I make her wet. That's what I love, that I laugh my way to the Pussy Bank. I love it. I put that pussy juice into that account, and I save it for my grandchildren where it gets interest.

What a lucky plushie it is. And did you do the laugh? Was that all three? All right. Well, there we go, everyone. Thank you all so much for listening. Hope you're doing all right out there. We are going to see you soon in Grundeck County.

So make sure you get the tickets. I believe the first show still has a few available. So check those out, and we can't wait to see you, and we have some big announcements coming in the very near future. Hold on to your balls, because weed is happening at some point. Henry and I are going to be out there slinging it.

It'll be a lot of fun. We'll be real fucking slinging it. We're going to be entrepreneurs. Yeah, and that's what, you know, we, it is going to be interesting. I can't wait. All right, everyone. Hail yourselves.

Hail to the Gustalations. Hail me. Don't fuck your dolls. Or do. I mean, unless you like it. Or do. You can do, you can fuck your dolls. I've come full circle.

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