Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: Tootsie

Episode Date: June 3, 2026

Henry & Eddie bring you this week's biggest stories and true crime news - the boys process the new Netflix documentary The Crash, Bricks & Minifigs in hot water over massive stolen Star Wars Lego Collection scandal, Man who threw rock at Sea Lion in Hawaii facing multiple ongoing consequences, Unhinged girl stabs horses at Barrel Race in Las Vegas, Screw worms are back... the boys mourn the loss of our beloved furry friend Tootsie... and we close the show with a very special Listener Emails: Self Suck Edition... For Live Shows, Merch, and More Visit: www.LastPodcastOnTheLeft.comKevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Last Podcast on the Left ad-free, plus get Friday episodes a whole week early. Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus.  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

There's no place to escape to. This is the last podcast. On the left. Side stories? That's when the cannibalism started. Side stories. Yes. You know that song?

You don't know that song? No. She's choosing Texas I can tell. By the way, she's two-stepping around the room. It's sing by those Malaysian triplets I like. The Malaysian triplets? Yeah. Sing the song about Texas?

played it with on the Billy Wayne Davis last dream you weren't there for that one. Oh, I don't watch stuff that I'm not a part of. Yeah, of course. But it's the song is done by somebody else, but I only know done by the three ageless Malaysian triplet boys. I think our men

that are on Instagram. What are they called Rob? The Mu-Yoon. The Mu-Yun brothers. Yeah, the Mu-Yun brothers. Yeah, they do agree. Like, that song, I honestly feel like it's better than the original song, because then I try to listen to the original song. It doesn't have the same Malaysian triplet style.

No, yeah, it's kind of irreplaceable. I love seeing three people that are, you know, the audience knows. I like people that are tinier than me, but older than me. Yes. I like But I don't think these boys are older than you, unfortunately. How old could

the Majong triplets be? They swear they're 24. I've looked this up before and there's no definitive like information on that. They could be, but honestly, but they got a set of pipes on them. And you know what? Those pipes are only seven inches long.

Man, I love watching Korean guys do creed on karaoke. Well, that's where... I hate creed. But when I watch a dude from South Korea sing creed perfectly, there's something magical about it. Philippines,

South Korea, they have Thailand. That is the land of karaoke, my friend. They have it on lock. They are... Like, what's his name? Who replaced Stephen Perry? Yes. The guy, yeah, Journey. The only one is irreplaceable. You don't know.

Where am I alone? Am I on an island alone? I'm the co-host and I know. Rob. Welcome to side stories. Sitting here, that's actually a really good reminder that he is my co-host. I'm sitting here with Ed Larson. How you doing?

What's going on? My name is Henry Azabreski. Yes. Hey, name is Henry Zabreski. Yes, it is. I'm sorry, I just became one of those little Malaysian boys for a second. I didn't mean to but we just came back from Rochester

and boy, as our asshole tired. Arna Pinita is his name, the lead singer and journey. Oh yes, that's right. And God bless him and congratulations. He does a great job. He does. He's incredible. He sounds just like him. The other guy's still alive, right? Oh, yeah. He just got fired because he can't sing

anymore. No, no, no. He can still sing. He specifically just chose not to because he said it was too much for him. He didn't like touring. He was blowing him out, blowing his voice out. And I think he also was an asshole. Can I say something that's guaranteed to piss off a lot of people? Please.

Journey sucks. Wow. Journey fucking blows. I like Journey. Journey could go fuck with Boat Bon Jovi. You know, I get it. I think Journey has its place. Yeah.

I think it has its place. But yeah, Steve Perry, he is not coming back to Journey, no matter how much we beg him. Sorry, guys. Side stories, L-P-O-T-L-G-Mel.com. How do we get Steve Perry back in Journey? Worst part of the Sopranos ending. Absolutely. Oh, you know.

I liked it. I liked it. But we have other big news. Again, a big update. Rochester isn't horrible. What's wrong with you? Yeah, Rochester was so nice. Everybody just said, oh, enjoy Rochester.

Hope you like graves. And we got there and it's the sweetest place in the world. We were in the nice part of town. That's what they said. Yeah, later on, they were like, thank you for being so nice. But this is the nice part of town. Don't go over here. I won't go there, though.

And you're correct. And thank you. We saw the sun. the sun on our side of town. We were walking around. The sun was out. I think it only comes up on that side of town though. Yeah, there was like, yeah, there was peaceful people. People said hi to me. I walked around.

Then there was like, hello. How are you doing? People were waving at me and stuff. It was very great. Dude, radio social. Bigups, you fed the fuck out of us. It was delicious. I am really sorry. It was delicious. Ever doubting. Radio social. Holy shit. Great food. Go check it out. I mean, we had the duck legs. They were amazing. The fried

cheese bricks. Yeah. Yeah. It's fat bucks. So fat. That giant hunk of pork. It was so good. I did have a little bit of the salad. It was fine.

Yeah. Yeah. It was kind of, it was like a bed. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For the other ones to slide. It's like a sled. It's like a sled. It's like a sled and then the food just slid down it into my gullet.

So thank you guys. Thank you, Rochester. Thank you for everybody who came out to both of the shows. We had a great weekend. It was the first time as like a non-football fan that I saw a bunch of people wearing Bill's clothes, you know, like, as like a Dolphins fan, I hate the bills. Yeah, sure. And I, like, but I, you know,

renounced football. Yeah, you're out of the game. And I see a lot of people wearing bills clothes and there was still like a little part of me in the back of my spine. I was like, fuck yourself. Fuck yourself, you fucking piece of shit. It's the power of advertising. And I was just like, oh, stop it. It doesn't matter. Now this matters. Football doesn't matter.

There's no it is. But there's a little part of me that was like, you piece of shit, Bill's fan. Go eat shit. I'm Brian Cox, two fingers up at you, you're fucking cock sucker. That's how. And then I was like, powerful it is. Stop it. You're past this. You're better now.

You're better. You're cured. You are. You are, but you're not, though, because you've got angry. You know what? I didn't say nothing to nobody. See, that's the... I say nothing to nobody.

That's the thing. I haven't heard nobody. I'm a good guy. That's all you can ask for. It's because that is where the healing is because he did not attack a random woman wearing a Bill's jersey. But shoot a fucking ugly in it.

Hey. I'm sorry. There's nothing you can do about it. See, look how powerful all of that is. He's still. still overcoming his NFL trauma. Yeah. Still here.

But it was a little piece of the undercoming. Bill's fans. Wow. Yeah, because they can't get them out. They can't get them out of their fat cots. Why are we doing this, Eddie? There's no reason to be like this, Eddie. You don't watch football anymore.

You don't have these rivalries inside of you anymore. We have to purge them. We have one little update from somebody who met Joey Chestnut. I just wanted to read this really quick. Oh, wow. A sighting. Really, really quick. Really mean a prison?

God. No. No, and worse, a macaroni eating competition. That's fun! You know, to be, to me, to be a contestant, sure, but to watch many men eat as much macaroni salad. Are you telling me you don't want to go? No, of course. Is that what you're trying to tell me right now?

I want to be in the VIP tent. Yes. All right? I want to be guest of talent. I definitely don't want to be eating the same food as there either. No, absolutely not. So this person, I love this. This is just a little story about Joey Chestnut.

For those of you that don't know, we covered him last. about how a judge allowed him to compete. He released him from his probationary holding in Indiana to be released to New York City for the July 4th, Coney Island Hot Dog Eating Contest for the 250th Year Celebration of the United States of America. And what a glorious year it is. And so this lady met Joey Chestnut.

Yeah. I was in Woodstock, Georgia. He was at a restaurant that's sadly been closed down called the original hot chicken. It was something like that. It was actually really good. They dipped the chicken and cornflakes and then they fried it. It's at lunchtime.

I'm hungry now. Anyways, he was at some event this place was having, and he said he was in a macaroni eating competition there. Now, thank God I was not there to witness said competition, but my then-fiance and I were there for lunch. And Mr. Nut himself was walking around. And I stood up to meet him with the rest of my party, and he cut off my van soon to be future father-in-law to ask me, where'd you get that bag? My wife

wants one so badly. Now, I'm not going to lie. I straight up lied to that man. I told him I didn't know where I got it and known full and damn well where it came straight from China as it was a knockoff of a go-yard bag, but do you think I'm going to admit that? A hell no. You just said.

Anyways, that's not the fun part. When I tell you the breath on that man could have killed every single competitor in the enhanced games. Oh my God. I couldn't tell you what it looked like, what he said, what I said, what anyone said, because that smell was so powerful, terrible. Oh, my God. It's been years, and I can still smell it. If I think about it for too long, it will ruin macaroni for me, because I'm pretty sure it was from the like 10 pounds or something stupid of macaroni

that he had just been. I can't even describe it. I did it. I did it. wrestler for years and during wrestling season when he had a cut weight he would get awful got mouth and that was bad i've smelled the breath of people with a rotten tooth or two and that's bad this was a new level of horror hey come on this is slander hey you know hey that's a part of it dude yeah i'm sorry if you don't think that the man whose own hole and gullet is a sarlack of such power of such pure american fortitude you don't think it's going to give off some exhaust yeah Also, like, that's honestly, you know, I don't like to speak ill of a nut. But fucking, if his breath was so bad that a woman from Georgia almost swore off macaroni,

fuck. That's bad breath. He just mightn't look into that because that could be a gut issue. But I do think- It's definitely a gut issue. He's got a gut issue. But Joey Chestnut, still, we know you're killing yourself early for us. We love that about you.

When you die early, I swear. I'm going to be at your funeral, salute and you're perfectly preserved, nitrate-ridden corpse, and I can't wait to be there because that's going to be the real 250th celebration, because your martyrdom is what will allow our sins to dissolve. Please be the new Jesus Christ, Joey Chestnut. It kind of is to fat people everywhere. For America. When he dies, that's when we can really start to think about our sins.

Oh, my God. You know he's going to die at like 94, and we're not going to understand science anymore. It's going to break every rule. He's going to be like liquefying hot dogs and putting it in an IV next to him in the hospice. And it's just being like, it's going to be, you know, like when your parents are like into one thing, like how they said like my father in the end, they're like, you know, he shouldn't even quit smoking. That'll kill him. It's fucking, he's barely alive. I think at some point they'll be like, if he even quits hot dogs, they won't make it a week.

He has to still eat several. at least a quarter pound of hot dog meat. 80% hot dog at this point. It has to say we have to keep it above him, but he does definitely have large unhinged jaws. Yeah, man. I'm really proud of him. I love the chestnut.

Shout out to you, brother. I'm glad you're going to come back and fight, even though you're probably a criminal. But, you know. Hey, he got into, he was having. He had to go. He thought it was a funny, he thought he was doing something funny with a fan.

I mean, I wish that he, like, turn into Kirby and just swallow the guy. They'd be like, oh shit. Yeah, because then he'd be like one of those Japanese folklore monsters. That's Kobayashi. All right, so let's get into some stories of the week. Oh, Eddie. Oh, Eddie.

I charged you with watching a documentary, and you did. Oh, yes, I watched the Crash movie. Now, this story, I got all kinds of feelings about it. Yeah, this is a good one because I think it'll bring up a lot of conversation. It's kind of out in the, it's out in the zeitgeist right now, and we'll talk about it because I watch a documentary. and I'm also angry. So this starts on July 31st, 2022. The 17-year-old McKenzie Sherilla

crashed a car going 100 miles an hour, killing her two passengers on impact. One of them was her boyfriend, 20-year-old Dominic Russo, and the other was their mutual friend, 19-year-old Davian Flanagan. Now, what we're seeing here is at first they thought it was a horrendous accident.

She got pulled from the thing. Yeah. She was all disoriented. I remember first seeing this story as a body cam. So the body camp footage is fucking horrific. They show it in the movie. They show all the cut to of all stuff. So first you see this car that was obliterated or ran to the side of the building.

You could see all of the various CCTV footage leading up to it, which shows that it specifically sped up. And they also found that out when they took the black box out of the car. Never once hit the break. It didn't really speed up as much as it maintained 100%. It just was the pedal to the metal all the way into the wall. For the last five seconds of what happened. They know it got, the wheel got jerked back and forth. At first, Mackenzie Sherella was hospitalized and considered to be another victim.

They thought that maybe she had, because they found a little bit of drugs in the car. She was, I don't think she was even all that intoxicated. No, it came back pretty clean. Yeah, she had like THC in her system. But that's it. And that's it. And they came back first thing, it was a horrific accident. Everyone was doing mushrooms.

There was no mushrooms in her system? She specifically didn't take mushrooms. Everybody else was on mushrooms. So she eventually had to go to trial, and she was found guilty on two counts of murder. This comes from a long, unbelievable defense where she basically said, I have an undisclosed medical condition that causes me to just go to sleep, and that I happen to also be tired, and I also happen to be on drugs, and I also happened to be extra sleepy, so I went to sleep, and I killed everybody.

Dude, when I saw her lawyer, the first thing I thought in my head was, this guy ain't saving anyone's life. No, no, he was a mess. He looked like he was asleep. And like, he's kind of like a snoring awake type of dude. Yes, he's a, and which is like, I don't want a low-energy lawyer. I don't like, well, don't want now. I'll be talking with the George after this. That's what I want.

I want an uptight New York lawyer. Yeah, and also, they really fucked up when they said they didn't want a jury trial. they just wanted the judge. A jury, you can like, a judge, you're not going to get sympathy from just a judge. No, a jury can fuck shit up. Yeah, yeah. That was a huge mistake.

Well, I think they thought they had a bit of overconfidence, which is really revealed in the documentary. Well, because it takes a lot of balls to charge you with murder and not manslaughter. Well, because you could definitely lock her up for manslaughter. Well, they tried. That's really easy. Oh, they tried to negotiate a plea, and they said no as well.

So they went through all this now. She's got 15 years to life, which is still technically, Is it 15 or is it 15 plus 15? Is it 15 for each person? It seems that they are doing I believe it is, yes, you're right. It's 15 and then 15. And then she can get parole. Yeah.

And she's still trying to get let out of jail and shit. But this is the thing. So from jail, she's automatically like all of these like the people around her, she started this like mean girl squad, which is how she started shit in the begin with. When she, she grew up in Strongsville, Ohio.

Yeah. Apparently she had like a like she did one of those like what do they call them slam books and she had like a bunch of different very common remember my sister got Jackie got in quite a bit of trouble oh I bet Jackie had a slam book oh yeah she was good at it oh they were very upsetting

they were very upsetting the slam books I would not want to be in Jackie slam book I but this lady McKenzie loved the Regina George character from mean girls yeah which is that what you're supposed to do She is a 17-year-old girl who sucks. And basically, you know, not to like, no, I'm not victim-blaming in any case here, but her parents seemed like they were hands off.

Oh, this is. And they were very enabling. We'll get all into this. So by 16, she was essentially living with her 19-year-old boyfriend, Dominic. Yeah. Her parents did not care. They thought that it was cool. They liked Dominic.

They liked being alone and smoking weed. I think that's exactly what they liked. And I, believe me, you couldn't talk to two bigger weed lovers on the face of the planet, right? Yeah, but we don't have kids because of it. Yeah, because I don't want them, all right? And if I had kids, I'd have to come far away from the weed or I'd smoke weed in another room. And eventually you'd become the thing, oh, that's that smell. That's when dad likes us, right?

Because he went in for that old. Eventually they'll put two and two together. But it would take a while, right, for them to first figure out what's happening. These guys were actively smoking weed with her daughter. they were actively them allowing they wanted their lifestyle she was smoking so much weed she was choking up blood yeah and i saw what she was smoking too she was just doing those gigantic four-foot-tall bongs lots of dabs huge blunts yeah yeah kind of made me jealous she had every it seemed like every time she smoked weed she filmed it and put it on her phone and they were

able to use it as evidence very much so uh she is this is what i'll say right here to all my aspiring influencers, or call yourself an aspiring influencer. I want you to remember to not just build evidence against yourself. Yeah, because you don't know what crimes you're going to commit. Edit things. Edit things and remember things go on to the internet forever and that's where they stay there. I used to get so watching like them talk about their friend group. My friend group was very similar in high school.

We did lots of drugs. We smoked lots of weed. We drank like fucking fish. And obviously we all had our heads together. We loved each other. We were never violent towards each other. So that's like a very different situation. but like looking at this I'm so fucking happy only thing we had were disposable cameras that we just lost

you know these poor kids they have to have every film everything they have to have every moment of their lives documented every single mistake documented and it's just going to destroy your life throw the cameras away put you guys you guys get to put cameras and bags when you go party right yeah yeah yeah anyway so she ended up so let's just say her relationship with the 19 year old that she kind of lived with wasn't the most mature one in the world Eddie Yeah, but they'd been dating for four years. I know, and that's just, you know how that's forever. And you know when you're a teenager, you know what love is.

Because that's what her parents were just like talking about. They were like, well, they knew. They knew that they were in love. And it's like, are you fucking serious? They're 19 and 16. Both of them are morons. Both of them should be in Iran right now. All right?

Like, these should not be, this is that they shouldn't be dating. This is ridiculous. They should not be, like, this is in your way of doing this. They shouldn't be fucking lived together. It's whatever. But of course, they're constantly breaking up, constantly getting back together and constantly threatening each other with vehicular manslaughter. Yes.

Which is mostly coming from McKenzie's end. She threatened to kill Dom. I mean, it's only coming from her end. Yes. And she threatened to kill Dom multiple times while in the car. She threatened to kill Dom. She threatened to shoot him. She threatened to shoot herself.

She threatened to kill them both. Over and over and over again. She was unhinged to say the least. Yes. And they, every time, like a week before the crash, they had broke up over text and then two hours later they immediately worked it back out. It's that type of dumb

shit. It's the shit we saw a million times when we were kids. Just dumb kids being dumb until the moment someone does something that involves you just not being ever held accountable for a single thing. It's almost like she did this. Obviously

she's guilty. Well yeah she got proven guilty. It's like one of those things where it's like kids don't understand that you don't get another life. You don't get like a do-you don't get to reset the game. You don't just like you know like it's like it's unfortunately like it's really

hard and I didn't know that personally and there's a couple situations where I definitely could have died when I was younger and I didn't and I'm very lucky and I thank whatever for it but like man just fucking calm down. Yeah dude. You got to be careful out here. It's really

scary and like these kids they fucking they don't understand death and it was not to you get to your like late 20s where you really start to realize oh, it's like permanent and shit. And there's no like you're going to reason your way out of this. The problem is when you're

in high school and you have a high school mentality you really I think maybe believe oh I can like find a way out. I can go and do some extra credit or I can say I'm sorry because you're used to doing things that make your parents mad and not doing things that

kill people. So when you then kill somebody you're acting at like it's all the same exact level because your brain's not solidified yet. You're literally, you have no idea that these things are actually doing shit. Because this bitch loves, like, Shirilla, she loves you being called Shirilla the killer. That's what they call her in prison and she loved it. She also now has a prison girlfriend.

She's fully acclimated to prison while then going on... You don't see the series Night of? Well, when it first came out. It reminds me of that. As soon as I saw her, because at the end of the doc, they have an interview with her, I just couldn't. I'm like, this shit's night of was like a motherfucker. Yes. Because she's just like, she just became a gangster. Just she's like

straight up, she's a gangster now. She went right in and she, honestly, she loved it. She's really at home in prison. I think that here's my controversial take on the whole thing. I think she's guilty. I think she got what she deserved. But I do think that the trial was very manipulative.

And I guess they got the result they needed to. I think they were using evidence that like necessarily shouldn't have been evidence, like her flipping out when her boyfriend locked her out of the house, like, and her screaming at the front door, like, she's 16 and she's locked out of her house. Of course, she's going to freak out. But also, she, it's all about how she does it. You know, she does, and she used, and it's evidence that used against her, and she did commit

the crime, but it's just like, ah, you know, it was one of those things. And then the stuff in jail, when they're doing the interview in jail, and they ask her a question, and then she asked her lawyer if she can answer it, and they use that as, like, evidence against her. It's like, of course, of course. she asked her lawyer if she could answer it. Like what do we fucking, what, since when are we not allowed to ask her lawyer before we answer

questions? It depends on the question. And using that, like, no, it's like using that against you is extremely fucked up and I think irresponsible on the filmmaker's part. Yeah, maybe, but also they don't talk to somebody before, like, don't talk to somebody. Yeah. Don't fucking talk to somebody. Same thing with her going on to these

jail calls and exhibiting that she has a secret language with her her mother that no one else can decipher so that she could say secret things over the fucking camera. I highly doubt they're able to because that mom is not smart. No, she is not a good mom. Every time that mom tried to help, she just dug a deeper hole. She was not good at helping. It's almost like she's stoned all the time.

Sort of. The second one, like, she's going back and forth. So it's like at first they went and they tried to get an appeal going. The first one was attempted in September 2024. They upheld the conviction. There was another appeal that was supposed to happen in 2025, but they failed. fucked up and didn't put the paperwork in correctly. After that, McKenzie got new attorneys who filed another appeal

claiming that a previously unexplored medical condition could have been at fault, which is horseshit. But she is still in jail and it is concurrent. So it's 15 years. Okay, it's 15 years. So she has 15 years. Then she gets her first parole here. I mean, they're going to let her out.

She'll do it. She'll do her time. Just hopefully she's not a fucking, hopefully she can grow. And right now she's obviously regressing and becoming, you know, turning into college for her. She's only going to get work. unfortunately, but she also... Because that's the prison system we have in this country. But she also killed due people.

So that is the issue is because she's also, when you start off as an asshole and then you go to asshole classes, you're going to become a master asshole. Yeah. It is that thing, though. I will forever feel something for people under 18 that get the book throwing out of them. I know what you're saying. I know what you're saying,

but she, I always like, you're allowed to. I'll always take it with a grain of salt because it depends on what's happening. It's at on some level, people that kill someone, they have to have the whole fucking book dropped on their fucking face. Yeah, because otherwise other people are going to see it

and be like, oh, that's not that bad. I could do five years. If you could kill somebody, if you kill somebody with your actions, unfortunately, that's kind of as bad as it goes. And you need to experience the adult ramifications of your, even if it's just

a tragic mistake, that is a thing you must learn from. I think that one of the things I kept going back to was the fact that she said that she fell asleep and then accelerated. To me, like, don't, if you're going to make up a disease to the reason you didn't stop accelerating, choose a seizure.

Something that, like, stiffens your leg, you know, where you have to, like, press the pedal, like, asleep, you would have let go of the pedal. Too young to be good at crime. It's just like, yeah, so you choose, choose a crime, choose a better crime. Choose a better angle. But honestly, the documentary really made me angry and you can go check it over out over on Netflix. Yeah, no, it's totally worth of watch.

Yeah, it's really great, but it makes me angry. Here's another story makes me angry. Oh, I hope it's good for everybody. See how angry I get. Live from your blade. This one I don't know much about it. I'm ready to hear your take. Okay, so this is a bit of a, this is a windy one.

This is a windy one. So this story, first of all, involves Legos. So my wife, I gotta go. Yeah, I know. I know. My wife loves Legos Marcus loves Legos Right I think it's Lego

You didn't even be saying it incorrectly I can already hear the Lego people going like I'm in a little house I think it's Legos I think you could say Lego's store Not the Legos store I like my palm trees to be fake I leave it a little clicking clicking house

I like to get my Legos and Lagos Me too Lego my Legos Because if you don't I'm gonna fucking sew your ass Coming for you, bricks and mini fags. I was, you know, I build a wall like any motherfucker. I know you love building a wall.

This is my wall. And I used to, my old wall, it's crumble. And this wall, I put, at the bottom, I put base. It's supposed to be harder to break this wall. You're looking at the big bricks that goes. They're different now. They're very delicate. I like ones that I can punch.

Yeah, I know you do. It's just real bricks. Here we go. Let me try it if I could disseminate this. I'm going to do this as thoroughly as I can. And but we'll talk about this. So this starts with Brian Mansell. He's an Oregon man.

Him and his father, they spent years putting together what is considered to be like, it's one of the biggest collections, massive collection, a vintage Star Wars themed Lego sets. Apparently the collection was worth like 200 grand. There's a lot. There's a lot in toy money. And they go and they've been doing this for years together. this father and son, Mormon activity of collecting Lego sets together is so much better than collecting wives and child brides.

So good on you. Good on you. Keep them busy. Keep them busy, right? So they went to this place called bricks and mini figs. No, no, that's not your new local brewery with the pork belly date skewers. No, that is the worst name of a story I've ever heard. It's a thing for Lego consignment stales, right?

So it's a franchise that's like a consignment stores. So you go and like they sell old vintage Lego sets and they, they buy them from you and it's like it's like a thing, right? And they, I guess it's like there's many branches of it. And it's a Mormon run company, which is a thing that comes out. They find interesting. They love toys. They love toys because we're all just little fucking toys to them, aren't we? So eventually this father and son have decided we must sell this.

We need money, I guess. So what they did is they went to their local bricks and mini figs that was run by a woman by the name of Crystal Gorman. And they said they set up this little individual deal with her. Psycho Gorman. Psycho Gorman. Man, that was great. We talked to the director. He's actually, he's a lot of fun.

Hell right. So the goal with this was that they were going to take the collection of Star Wars, toys. They could use it for advertising, which they did. They then said, you can come and see this gigantic, like, only here collection of Star Wars. Star Wars Lego here and this very specific bricks and

minifix. I like when stores become like museums. It was like that and it was also the goal was to sell them off and then the bricks and minifigs

would get a percentage and then they'd give the larger percentage back to Brian Mansell and his father everybody's happy. It was co-signment. It was like a cosignment

dude. It was a whole thing, right? So all of a sudden Crystal Foreman she would like later on a little while later she, I guess according to Crystal Foreman,

she notified at the corporate end that she or her husband and they were going to go, they might be leaving the country. And they thought about, can we sell our store? According to Crystal, she immediately was replaced. These guys show up. These two guys from corporate arrive and say,

we're taking the store back. We're taking the locks. They changed the locks. Seas control all the inventory, which includes all of the unsold Star Wars shit, right, sitting in there, right? So they got these new guys. Two fuckers by name Brandon Best and Josh Johnson, two Mormons, right? They got me a...

White shirt, shorts. You know exactly what they look like. Yeah. They got the... They got a rifle. They got a shirt with a rifle on it with like from a... Maybe... I guess not a brewery.

They're Mormons. So they got one like... Maybe something from a trampoline park. And then they got like a Colorado Rockies flat brim hat or whatever. God knows. And so they go in there to straight up say... They finally go like, okay, new management. We'd love to know about what do we do with this.

We want to like re-up and find out what you guys have sold. What we're... we're going to do. They said, first of all, fuck you. That contract's not viable. Everything in the store's ours. We might have about five grand worth of stuff for you somewhere in here. Then cuts to

him going through all of these legal matters to try to be like, I have a contract that says that we're doing this. And this is a contract that says, and that's my stuff. I have all of it fully inventoried by the fucking little scan number. It's all set. You can't lie to me. That is my stuff. That's me and my

father's stuff. Yeah, we have pictures of it. When nerds get mad, I get so sad. Right? Because it's just like, it's just Legos, right? And the worst part about this now is the police are getting involved. So this all came to the attention of a little... So that's good. No.

So it came attention to a little YouTube boy named Reckless Ben. I've never, I don't know who this kid is. I've never heard this before. I never know what he does. But I end up watching the full hour and a half special he did on this. And it is, he did a fantastic job. Hell yeah, Reckless Ben. This dude got involved and he said,

I want to get you your little. Legos back. So he's went hardcore in the paint. And this is when shit starts getting blowed up. So Ben starts inserting himself in the scenario to try to like go to the franchise and try to work his way through. They immediately call the cops. So they also then, he doesn't understand that they're... So they call the cops

and the guys trying to get their shit back? Yes. And so the cops come and say they've issued a trespass warrant on you. So we're going to kick you off the property. And he's like, well, actually, I'm here. And you see the body cam footage. She's like, I'm here. This is a contract that I've signed. They have my material in here. I would love to sit and just have a conversation about what we're supposed to do here.

And they literally, you're going to go to jail. You're going to go to jail right the fuck now. Like, couldn't care less. We're now seeing that the Mormon police, these are Mormon police officers, are coming to help this company keep these guys from get this money. Because bricks and mini figs in a recorded conversation, straight up told Brian, the Brian dude, listen, this is how this is going to go. You're going to sue us to try to get your shit back.

you and your fucking father's precious little slavely jerk-off material, right? You're going to try to get that back from us, powerful Mormons. That can fucking happen. Because if you do, guess what we're going to do? We're going to sue you back. And then we're going to make it so long. We're going to take this out. We're going to drag this out for fucking years.

And we're going to bleed you fucking dry to the point where this lawsuit's going to cost you three times as much as you would ever have made from the Star Wars collection. So you might as well drop it. And that's written down. Isn't that evidence? Yes, no, it doesn't matter because the cops have to file. That's evidence to me. The cops have to file a crime.

So right now, Bricks and Minifigs, now it's blowing up. There's all things fucking blowing up because the reckless Ben dude is going deeper and deeper and deeper. Fuck yeah, brother. Because every time he goes to a level, he finds out a new way they figured out. Because what they did was that they finally actually made a form of agreement to kind of settle whatever was going to happen. And when they finally went to go have the meeting where they were going to sign the contract, to say, all right, this is a settlement. They just shut the franchise.

So then they just shut the franchise. And they say, well, that's a franchise. It's got nothing to do with us. We're bricks and minifigs. You can't touch us. Bricks and minifigs. I mean, talk about these. Like it's maxi figs.

Right? These mini figs out here are doing incredible work, right? So they decided to just like, say, we're franchised, which is what then they did. So they started pretending to be bricks and mini figs so that bricks and mini figs would sue them back. It's a whole long process. So right now, go follow the saga. That's what I would do because it's going back and forth.

So right now, there's still no result. Well, bricks and mini-fix has come out just said, everybody's wrong, said that the lady that originally got rid of the franchise that they took over, they tried to say that she defaulted on payments. She's saying that that's horseshit. They stole from her, too. They stole from everybody. This is all about Mormon egotism.

All of this is Mormons not wanting to be incorrect. about a thing because what bricks and mini figs try to say in the very beginning was that, oh, well, you made a contract with a franchisee. We don't do that. So you, that it doesn't matter. We can't do that. So it doesn't matter. And it's like, uh, but I have a contract in my hands.

So does this exist or not? Is this a piece of fucking paper that I signed or not? Is this a fucking contract that I fucking put together or not? Yeah. Right? Because it's matter. Because you have to fucking go by the contract. But it doesn't matter.

They don't think it doesn't matter because they know better than us because they're fucking suck off God through a fucking curtain every year. fucking weak. And the police are corrupt. Of course there are. The police are involved in it. Well, the police are Mormon. Is this in Utah? This is all in Oregon. Oh, it's an Oregon. This is an Oregon, but it's still Mormons.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all Mormons and it's a Mormon community and the cops are fighting for the Mormons versus investigating the crime because they are all in bed with the religion. And all of this is about, that's the thing that no one, again, that truly, if you look at the, the material,

about this, there's not a single mention of the Mormon stuff anywhere, much like every other article about Mormon criminals that I think is fascinating because no one really wants to talk about why it's going down. The reason why they're even fighting for this to begin with is because Mormons are always right and we are wrong. Man, so their GoFundMe already has $250,000. Oh yeah, no, they're going to make a lot of money and I'm also, and I'm not pumping a GoFundMe because we don't really do that, but if you look at the statement. I'm curious about that is, I mean, like, well, if this is, then why not give up?

I don't know. Or just use this money to fight them. I think that's what you should do. I think that's what, that is what they are doing. But just know, it is there, bricks and mini figs put out a statement. You can go to their website. They are, of course, they're not guilty until proven guilty.

So we are obviously in that section. We, you know, who knows? But I, uh, I know they're liars. That's me. And I can say, They think they're better than us. Well, yeah. They think that we're all going to die and go to hell and they're going to die and go to heaven.

We just had an incredible interview with Mormon influencer, ex-Morman influencer, Alyssa Grenfell that was like talking about this idea of like the little silly things that they talk about how their $400 billion slush fund is a rainy day. I sick of this cute shit from you Mormons, you fucking evil Mormons.

Just hoarding fucking money, stealing from people just trying to collect Legos with their father. It is literally just because... It's the purest thing I think I can think of. They've decided that it should be theirs and it should not belong to him. And obviously they knew what to do with those Star Wars,

Legos, and those, that father and son were wasting it by enjoying them. Oh, man. This YouTuber, he's generated over 10 million views talking about this situation. Yeah, dude. And he ended up getting swatted because of all this. Oh, no, they're coming for him.

They sued, the Brickton minifix is suing him. Brickton minifix is coming hard for reckless Ben. So, again, he seems like a fine young man, and I think he's doing a good job. And I think that if you're going to weaponize YouTube, I like this. Yeah, I like this. This is a good way to weaponize YouTube because we're going up against something bigger than just a Lego selling company. This is about us versus God. And reckless Ben is going to beat God.

That's what this is about, and I hope so. Oh, well, there's another piece of shit in the news. Yay! There's a guy that we haven't talked about yet. which I'm very surprised at myself, to be honest with you, that we haven't brought this guy up. But he's back in the news again. And I'm going to say his name wrong,

but his name is Igor Litvinchuk. Oh, I'm gonna live in Chuk. He's from Covington, Washington. And if you haven't noticed, he got in a lot of trouble for throwing a big old rock and a monk seal when he was in Maui. You know, I saw the video. He literally just sort of like,

like I love how he pretends to have his side of the story. Yes. No, he's since developed a side in the story, but it like blew up in Hawaii. This guy is a gigantic piece of shit. He got caught on camera throwing this giant rock at a monk seal. He barely missed it. Which is also the saddest thing in the world that I only did, but he also was bad aim. Yeah, yeah. I don't really, and the monk seal obviously is a protected, is a protected endangered animal in Hawaii. He claims he thought it was the sea lion trying to attack a turtle. That is his claim. But that claim also came out weeks later.

After this video, he was caught on video that he told the woman who took the video, I have more, I have so money that I can take the fine. It doesn't matter because I'm rich. Yes, he just wanted to throw a thing at an aquatic mammal. So Hawaii took it amongst themselves. And one of the locals, you don't fuck around in Hawaii. I don't know if people understand this or not. Hawaii's not fucking around.

Yeah, you don't fuck around. Hawaii. You don't mess with the locals. You don't mess with the wildlife. They fucking, some dude found his ass the next day and beat the living shit out of him. As he deserves. It's on the camera. The guy who beat him, they didn't see his face. So he was never caught. The sheriff said that they're not looking for him too. No. And so then, you know, and so this guy, he goes back to Washington. And when he gets back to Washington, they fucking arrest him as soon as he gets there. You know, the guys, they should. Yeah. And, He's going after an innocent animal that it's literally just in its home.

It felt like it arrived on your fucking hotel room. It is in its home. Yes. And so now he is saying that his life has since been destroyed. Oh, no. Maybe it's because he threw a fucking rocket and a dangerous animal on camera, you fucking idiot. Yeah, he claims that he's a fisherman and he loves turtles and he was protecting turtles. Oh, yeah, you fucking idiot.

You pick up the turtle. Yeah, so he... Pick up the turtle. It's slow. It's total super slow if you want to pick it up and move it's a place. It's easy to do. But he was charged in violations of the Endangered Species Act and the Marine Mammal Protection Act. And they are critically endangered species among seals, especially this one.

This one, they all knew her name and they loved her. But he has pleaded not guilty in court. And if convicted, he faces a fine up to $50,000. Yes. And then also another $20,000 fine. The Marine Mammal Protection Act. What's his name again? His name is Igor Lit-Inchuk.

Igor Litvin-Chuk. Oh, yeah, Evor Lifton-Chuk. Hopefully you never work again. Yeah, man. This guy fucking blows. His life is ruined. Yeah, as it should be. Because all he had to do is be like, oh, my God, I'm drunk, I'm in a program.

Oh, my God, I have a rage issue. I need to go to therapy. Oh, my God, I'm just, oh, my God, I know what I was thinking. Like, these are all just samples, guys. Oh, God, oh, I wish I could take it all back. Oh, man, I thought it was an ugly woman. Oh, my God. Like, there's so many other things you could have said.

If he just said he thought it was a homeless man covered in kelp and he threw a rock at it, they would have applauded him. You know what I mean? Like, if they just went and if he just did that. But no, nobody has sympathy for you, dude. You're fucked. No, no, he is fucked. And this is the exact thing we should be doing to people like this.

Shame his ass. Shame him into. Poor, make him poor. And you know what? He probably is fine and he probably is rich. And they're like, this is the fucking attitude that people who are too rich have when they go visit places. They go to beautiful places to destroy them. They go to Hawaii and they think that just because they're on vacation, they can do whatever they want because they are on vacation and they have paid to go to Hawaii.

Good on the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration who fought and sought to arrest him when he caught back to the Seattle area. Honestly, this is great. They fucking nailed it. They took it very seriously. Honestly, I hope that this guy gets the top fucking punishment and just like, and you know what? Beat his ass again. Dude, fuck him.

He obviously has not learned his lesson. No. So I feel like he is going to unfortunately reoffend. I think that he's going to do now especially that he's going to be so butt hurt after something like this. I can almost guarantee he's going to reoffend doing something just as obnoxious. And when he does, hopefully there'll be a. group of people there to beat him again.

God, I hope he gets divorced. I hope his kids never talk to him again. I hope he gets everything. Because you could see him becoming as he's like, I'm not owned, I'm not owned. Like you could see him just be like angry that he got caught and angry that everybody's coming down on him. And that will hopefully force him to do something that'll put him in real jail.

When I look at a guy like this, I'm like, oh, there's no chance that anyone tells this guy, I love you. No one has ever been like. No one loves this man. I'm so glad you're here, Igor. Yeah, yeah. You know, he's never heard that. Oh, my God, Igor.

What do without you? People keep mailing him shit. As they should. Oh, yeah, yeah, no, he's getting harassed. Yeah, they literally mailing him shit. So, you know, I'm sure his address is on the internet somewhere if people keep mailing him shit. Go get him. Am I allowed to say that?

Go get him. You send him stuff. Yeah, no. I mean, well, you know, if you don't, it's fine, too. But, you know, if you do, who cares? Make sure it's gross. Right. So we got, there's a.

Another fucking animal attack on this thing. This was one of those that's just more out of the movie. Have you ever seen the movie Equis? No. You ever see it with, what's his name? Not the fact guy from Harry Potter. What's his name? That was on the play.

When Harry Potter showed Dong. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I saw that play. You saw it his penis. Yeah. How was it? British. Good.

But, you know, it was a good play. It was very, it was very cool. The original... I wanted to see it myself. I'll show you a picture, Daniel, Radcliffe's penis. Hell yeah. It's actually probably just on here. I'm sure people suck some pictures.

Daniel Radcliffe penis. Thank you. Use it on the office computer, please. I got you. Thank you. Yeah, safe search is off. There it is right there. Where is it? I don't see it. Yep, because it's far away. Oh, that's a good dog. That's a healthy dog. Why does he have to touch the horse?

Why is he with a horse? Yeah, why is he with the horse? This is a different... In the movie, so in the show slash Now we're just looking at a naked man. Now we're just looking at the frozen pictures. They are adding to his penis and those, oh, why do they do the butthole shot? Get this out of here. Get this out of here.

Why did he bend over like that on stage? I love that. Harry Potter did this. Why did you show the audience? I love Daniel Radcliffe for this. I wish that every grown-up child star just shows their cock on stage in New York City. I just, I'm fired with the cock. I did not know about.

about the tainan asshole. Petronus. Ah, well, all right. Speaking of this, that's amazing. So, Equis, the play, Equis, a boy blinds a bunch of horse. Is it weird that his dick looks like Dobby? Please don't beat me, master. That's so nice.

To phone lip. Is this why Dobby committed suicide? Yes. Little ears. That's what he got circumcised, that's all they chopped off. The two side ears. Yeah. That's the chop off.

Gotcha, Daniel. Yeah, I do love you. You're doing really well, Daniel. I think it's going to be okay. Swiss Army Man was incredible. We all liked it. Yeah. So, in Equis, this boy blinds a bunch of horses

and then the whole thing's about his, like, relationship, these weird pseudo-sexual relationship. He has with these horses and the psychiatrist and blah, blah, blah, right? It's hilarious. Oh, my God. Laugh a minute. When he pulled his pants down and he went, now there's a salt lick

equis that was the whole audience said it at once it's like Rocky Horror Picture Show Yeah the tagline was Nay means name Yeah so That's disgusting So this story is about a teenage girl

Who did something very similar Now this was in a barrel race In La Vegas Las Vegas I don't know what barrel racing is Is that like a one of someone's on their hands and the other person's holding their feet that's a wheel barrel

I'm close I'm close yeah the horse is the horse you pull up a horse's hoops and you drive it by its dick they run around barrels oh they run around barrels got boom done easy great

it's easy oh yeah yeah it's what I mean it's better than the rodeo I guess I guess it's a part of the rodeo probably this teenager was apparently like super creepy they haven't named her yet but she was super creepy and a lot of the parents were saying that she was a name her Sarah

Tatiana Tatiana Horse stabber Tatiana Tertiana horse pricker So Tatiana horsepricker was over in her

She was walking around With the various competition Now a lot of people said Tatiana horsepricker was not super good at barrel racing And that she apparently only finished For the qualifying match

Like 23 out of 25 and there was some talk about whether or not she did this as a way to sabotage the other horses. So Tatiano went into the stables and stabbed three horses. Jesus. We don't know whether or not the horses were stabbed. Because if they were stabbed anywhere but the trunk, they have to be killed.

Really? Yes, because if they have any emergency, anything done to their extremities, I guess they have to just, honestly, Eddie, I have no idea why. I've heard of a broken leg, you've got to kill a horse. Side stories, L-P-O-T-L-E-E-E-E-E. Email.com. Why are we killing these horses

so willy-nilly? Can't there just be no leg to horse? It could take a stab. Can we not put a horse on a in a wheelchair? What kind of knife did she use? I don't know. And I don't think you can't put a horse on a wheelchair. That's a big wheelchair. But I'm just saying there's got to put a horse on a cart. Right? Can't there be a horse

on a cart? I think it's really hard. Can horses just sit on their bellies? If a horse falls on you, you die. But if a horse is on his belly, and then you just flip it back and forth, if you just make sure it's uneven sides. We don't know whether or not the horses were what they were stabbed with, but they were stabbed. A lot of them, they say it's a knife.

They definitely use a knife. Okay. So they were all stabbed, and she didn't think partially was just because she didn't want to race that day. And she was afraid that she was going to get rapped. She was going to get lapped by all the other people. But I could also be, she just plumb crazy. Yeah, she seems like a psychopath. Well, yeah, either way, it's not as real rational way.

If you stab a horse for no reason, you're a psychopath. Also, you know, I would say a reasonable response would be if you feel that you're not getting the results you want from your competitive, like, sport, practice harder. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what I would say. Before you stab all the other horses. That's me. Only just because I'm super not into stabbing horses.

Also, just getting there is the part of the price. Dude, you're there. You're in top 25. You could barrel race better than most people in America. There's thousands of barrel races. Be happy about that. You're in the top. 25, celebrate it.

This is an Angola Prison Rodeo. You're fucking, and Vegas, people pay tickets to see you. Are you a Spaniard princess? Why do you need to be the queen of horses, Tatiana Horse Pricker? Even if you come in last, you're still a horse barrel rider. Stay home. Well, you know what? Not anymore, though.

Because now that you stab these horses you're officially on my naughty list. And I don't think you should be allowed to go back, but that's just me. That's just one humble broadcaster's opinion, you know? And then maybe that's maybe she just needs a timeout. Yeah. Well, she's joined the, you know, maybe they should stab her and she should be in the

de-hance game. See how fast that pitch could go around a barrel. The old thing are fucking so bad, man. This was so bad, dude. Did you see that guy doing anti-gravity push-ups? No. There was one guy, like, held his hands, and then he did, like, push-ups in mid-air and it's like, great.

Now what? Yeah. What does that do for you? Nothing, right? Oh, man. I got to fucking. die of a brain aneurysm from all your fucking peptides. Oh, my God.

Live from your blade. I got a tiny update for everybody just to scare everyone a little bit. Please. Screw worm, remember the screw worm? The screw worm that was getting in the cattle, and then we were buying the cattle, and it was coming up. Yeah, the screw worm is now 30 miles south of the United States. She's back. It's not back.

It's close. Yes, yeah, yeah, it's coming up there. So they've noticed it down in... Oh, good for her. The Kalahoula State in Mexico. It's a 30 miles south of Texas. Glow up of the century. Welcome's to stateside.

Yeah, they found it in some sheep. Travel maxing. Yeah, actually, it's interesting because they both... They said they found it in sheep, and then they're also like... They also found it in a goat-like animal. Which I don't know what that means. What do you mean?

What do you talk about it? It's a goat-like animal. Are we getting vague about animals? Just say goat or ram? I don't know. Like, what do you mean goat like? Yeah, what the fuck are we talking about? Are you inventing animals to put screw worms?

You have like a thing called like a mama tuba or like a, oh, it's called a, it's called a sloat. Yes, yes, it's a sloth goat. What the fuck are you talking about? Yeah, I mean goat like, dude. I don't believe anything you're saying about these screw worms. If you don't know what the animal it was in. If you don't know what animal it is, you don't know what a screw worm is. It's a goat or a ram or a lamb or something like it.

It's not a cat. It's somewhere between a bison and a cat. It's somewhere between the two. It's goat-like. It's goat-like. By meaning it it has legs like a goat does, and it has eyes like a goat does. But that's really all I can compare it in that way, because it has fins like a goat doesn't. And wings like a goat does it.

So they're worried about this outbreak getting too close to America, obviously, because once it gets into the cattle, we're kind of fucked. The USDA estimates that a screw worm incursion could inflict $1.8 billion in damage in the lone star state alone. All right. Screw little screw worm is clammy, clean. I mean, I don't know, man. This is going to be tough. Maybe it's time to eat less beef. Honestly, I really hope.

I feel like the screw worm is a good time for all of us to like sit back and be like, you know what? Maybe we should follow Chick-fil-A's advice here and eat more chicken. You know what I'll say? We'll just see how this all shakes out in 2028 when we see Buttigieg screw worm running for president of the United States of America. And honestly, I'm fine with the screw worm because the screw worm made it from the bottom. Now they're here. That's right. And that's such a huge get good work on your screw worm.

Hustling. That's the hustle culture showing. that's bringing you to America, and that's what we love about immigrants coming here. Well, that's where the whole thing is it's like hardworking people, making America great game.

And then, you know, and so we've blocked all cattle imports from Mexico for a year. Done. Yeah, so that'll solve it. Hey, I don't even know why we're talking about it. Because the problem's been solved. Except, I think I'm

sitting on the screw room right now. Whoa! We have really sad news. Is this more sad news? No, I think it's time. Oh, well, before, I want to give a little bit of good news, and then I'll get into the sad news. All right, just a little bit of, yeah, a little bit of good news.

There's a good segue. No, it is nice. Screw worm, it is nice. But in honor of our episode, we just recently had episode 666 come out. We're talking about. Hail Satan. Anton LeVey. And I can help but think that we have a piece, you know,

I feel like we do things on the show and then the week after things happen. And I don't know if we got anything to do with it or not. Alligator Alcatraz, Alligator Pelican shutting down. We shut it down, yeah. That was us. And now bus route. Certainly not all the activists. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

It was us. Well, I know. I'm just saying, like, it's interesting. It's interesting. It is interesting. It is. But bus route 666 is now going back to hell. That's right.

In Poland, there was a bus route that goes to a town called hell, each E. L and it was always bus route 666 but now they changed it to bus route 6669 Yeah because everyone was scared. They're stupid. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So some guy went in there and he's like, you know, I want it back to B 666 and they changed it back.

So 666 now goes back to hell. Shout out to Poland. Shout out to hell. Shout out to 666. Wow. Yeah. Well, that's, wow. They can really just change that one thing, huh?

Yep. They can just go a poll in there. You know, they're surprisingly better than us. Well, just on that one thing. Yes. And speaking of a highway to hell. All right. Still a segue.

I just want to just say, Eddie, we've honestly made a lot of fun here, but I think it's important for you to send. I lost Tootsie yesterday. Poor girl. She finally passed away. I loved her with all my heart. She's such a good baby. And it was definitely Tutsi's time.

We We sent her to the back rooms Can I honestly Great for Kane Great for Payne pixels He's being on big shout out to Kane Can I ask And I don't want to be

I want to be as sensitive as possible about this Because I know it's you're very sad It's a lot We did let them keep the vagina Yes Great Great Because they work so hard on it

My other question is that Did it have to be done With a silver bullet Oh Like did you have to remove her head And then put garlic in the head and burn the head separate. Well, we did, what we did was we gave her the normal, you know, sedative.

And then we gave her the extra anesthesia that, you know, takes them out eventually and stop breathing. And then Tutsi was like, I like it. Give me more. She's like, this is great. This is the first meal I've enjoyed it months. Yeah, she got all active. Yeah, yeah. And so the doctor's like, we don't usually have to do this.

But then they fucking, they brought out the silver bullet. And you're like, and then they shot her. And then the craziest thing happened. she turned into a woman. We're like, well, like, what? It's just like, all of a sudden there's... Old? Just like beautiful, naked woman.

Okay. Just like in the vet's office sitting there and we're like, Tootsie? Wow. And then she was like, thank you all you have done to me. And then she turned in the dust. Well, you had this hot naked woman in your house this whole time? This whole fucking time. Jesus Christ.

Did Julie get instantly jealous and then relieved? Yeah, it was one of those. Honestly, it's like, thank you for release. And then Julie's like, forget what those breasts look like. You forget. Well, honestly, thank you. It was a long journey with Tootsie. We had her for almost five years, four years, three months.

It was honestly one of the people. You took amazing care of her. You know, the dog, you know, she was barely a dog for the last year. But she was the sweetest, kindest baby. We took a wonderful nap yesterday. We, like, I put it away, we went skin to fur. And we had a nice long nap. And she got to see the Grand Canyon.

She got to see the Grand Canyon. Canyon. She was always wanting to. She got to finish the Martin Scorsese documentary. That's huge. Before Julie. We watched it together yesterday and then at the end she's like, I much kill us at the flower moon. I'm like Tussie, I think that one's a little

too long even for you. Yeah, I feel like there. She should have showed her silence. She was there. She was during the filming, yeah, during the story, the original story. Yeah, yeah. She was there. She said, take that priest and put him in the ocean. Put him in the ocean, make him denounce his face.

Damn, Tutsi. You fucking fall real. Oh, yeah. But, yeah, I love Tutsi. I love her so much. I cried way more than a big man should cry yesterday. And I will see you on the other side, old girl. And if there is a afterlife, you were already.

Yeah, that's the thing because I think she'd already been there. But we love you, Tutsi. I love you. It's a last piece of my mom. Yeah. Well, no, no, that's wrong. My aunt. Yeah.

My mom's sister. Yeah, get her. You know what I mean. But your aunt's not your mother. She didn't belong to your mother, you know? Well. Well, in truly more important news, in an update to last week's question, I'm sorry about this, guys. Oh, wait, before we move on.

And honor, Tootsey's last wishes for you to come to Phoenix this weekend so I can sell out this show. If you love Tootsie. If you love Tootsie at all, you would come to the Desert Ridge Improv on Sunday and see me, Amber and Julie, perform live. Because like, you know, and she's like, say, please tell them to fly in. Tell them to come in from all parts of the world and celebrate. This is going to be Tootsie's funeral. It's real. He's bringing her body.

Yeah, we're going to shoot her out of a cannon at the end, which is what they like in, That's the only thing that you like is a dead dog there. It's the only thing they laugh at. You pull out a dead dog. It's a clear. That's his closer. All right.

Take your picture off this crazy. Well, thankfully, it brings us to the most important topic of the day, which is last week, I asked for. And very hastily, didn't think about it. In honor of Grogu blowing himself throughout the entire movie. I asked for evidence. that sucking your own dick is real. Yeah. And let's just say,

here comes another one. Here comes another one. I gotta say, I've not really regretted something as much in a while, only just because like, I'm as open-minded San Francisco as you get, right?

We have talented fans. I love, I love everybody. I am the most fucking, like, truly, I'm down with women's lib. I am all about every kind of sucking and fucking. I think it's all great.

But I, nothing has made me feel more like a Christian Senator than reading these emails. Because some of these I'm just like, wow, I just didn't understand how big of a genre sucking your own dick is. How big of it is all pervasive

against all, through all gay porn. Yeah. About how it's, it's not only common, but liked. It's a fetish. and it happens all the time.

And not only that, but I'd say solid, 12% of our audience has done it or can do it or continues to do it. It's easier to do if you still have your foreskin. Apparently. It's like a strong. Because you suck on the top and you pull it in like it's like, like you're, you're, you're reeling in a fucking giant fish.

Okay, so here we go. Let me just go through some of these emails. Okay. Here we go. There we go. Auto-flatio. Ahoi, 31-year-old highly flexible trans. woman. Ahoy. I've been able to self-suck when I was younger and I can confirm it's possible.

Next one. Right. You're going to share my personal experience. When I was a teenager, I discovered I was the right combination of flexible and skinny enough and undoubtedly enough to get about two inches into my own mouth. As Henry alluded to, it was much more like sucking dick than getting your dick sucked. I can only really describe it as trying to tickle yourself. There was no pleasure gained and the discomfort of both being stretched and folded onto yourself and having a penis in your mouth meant that there was no way I was ever going to get myself there. That said, I was a dumb teenager, and I figured I would just need to give it a few tries, so it wasn't a one-time thing. My usual method was laying on my back and then bringing my hips up to my face while keeping my shoulders a neck flat on the bed or floor.

Another method was sitting on the edge of the tub or similar and craning my upper body down. I tried it probably five or six times before I fully gave up, and in retrospect, I'm extremely thankful no one ever walked in on me. someone sent it here several driver's license these are all redacted probably like 10 different redacted driver's licenses people just sending in their driver's license but with all of the information blacked out just to prove that they're sending a driver's license

um yours has to do with sucking your own dick just to say I'm a person that sucks its own dick here's my driver's license I suck my own dick oh wow so they want to be like on a government registry and they're on I sent it right I sent it right to Steve Miller guys So here's a next. This one's brutal. I dated a man who had osteogenesis imperfecta, typically referred to as brittle bone disease by dumb bitches like me.

This genetic disease affects your collagen production and causes your bones to break super easily. This man had steel rods in both legs and at 26 had lost count of how many fractured he'd suffered after 200, not including all the bones he'd broken during his own birth. I make hella suck on your own dick jokes. And he'd always look a little embarrassed when I did. Until about a month in dating. When he finally said to me, I can do that, you know. I got way too excited and immediately asked him a million questions about it.

Not do it? I even asked him if he broke two ribs just to be able to do it. But he somehow did not get that reference, you know? Too real, maybe. I also asked him, does it feel like getting your dick sucked or does it feel like sucking a dick? He quietly responded that it does indeed just feel like sucking a dick. dick. Anyway, I asked if I could see it because I'm of course, because I

want to see it and he said yes, but only if I didn't laugh. So I told him maybe it's not such a good idea after all. Thinking about the idea of it right now is making me laugh. There's a way I would have been able to witness it in front of him, so it didn't happen. She's like, you know what? I'm dumping you.

You know what? You're weak. My hot ex-co-worker in a pizza place was rumored to have done a solo porn where he sucks his own dick. I didn't believe it until he actually saw the video and it scarred me for life. He was lying on his back on the table and pretzled himself into a crazy position

where he put his legs over his shoulders. I canceled our hangout and couldn't look him in the eyes ever again. I think, I don't know if he came because I ran away like 12, like right, right? So here's another one. This one fucking also scares me. Robb's just got a video on of a cow

sucking its own others. Hey, hey, that's fucking really fun. This one I really like. What's that? You know, hey, you know, hey, you know, it's a lot. Hey, it's making youself of milk. I wish I got... Honestly, if milk came out of it, I'd be much more willing to suck my own dick.

If straight up milk came out of my penis... It's a lot easier. Like chocolate milk, I would suck my own dick. We're supposed to drink milk. I'll drink milk, but I won't suck. I don't like penis. I won't eat semen. Yeah.

So listening to this week's side stories episode, I was compelled to share some personal experiences. I will admit, as a young, curious teen, I attempt to deflate myself, but was unsuccessful. Now, for a lack of trying, I digress. recently I was overseas for work. While over there, I met a woman for what I thought would be a standard night out for drinks with no strings attached. The night was going well, but as she drank more, I began to learn more.

Somehow we had gotten onto the topic of sex. I wasn't complaining as the aspect was part of the reason we were meeting up in the first place. However, I quickly became self-aware about how vanilla my sex life was when she began to detail some of her own experiences. She was a self-proglaimed muscle mommy and enjoyed dominating. Her M.O. was making dudes bust their nut into their own mouths. To do this, she'd get them all horned up and perform oral sex on them. And when they were about to climax, she would hop off, flip their legs up towards their head, and proceed to jerk them off until they were left with no choice but to either spit or swallow their own coupe.

Wow. Her number up to that point had been four. And I sure as hell didn't plan on being the fifth. We went our seven ways. I'll never do it to you. This is something I'm done. I'm cured. I never do things like that anymore.

What's that movie with the chick who kills the guys, a pretty young woman or something like that? Oh, yeah, yes. She didn't even do it. She didn't fucking do it, dude. Oh, my God. Remember, like, we used to have a bit in our show that we do in J.K. Ultra that we had to cut where Henry would suck his own dick. I hurt my back.

You hurt yourself pretending to do it, and we had to stop. I had to stop doing the bit. Because it legitimately hurt my back. It's hard to do. You're just pretending. You got injured. It wasn't even, like, hurt. It was injured.

Oh, yeah. No, I was, yeah, I was injured. I was really hurt. I had to go to the doctor. I had to get a cortisone shot. But, hey, man. Look at me. I'm great. All right. So that's, this one last one about a bunch of 16-year-olds convincing a guy on O'Magel to send him a video from sucking his own dick. And it's just, it's just a lot, man. What do you do in the 16-year-olds of the predators? This is the problem is that they are manipulating you. Don't just let any 16-year-old tell you to suck your own dick on camera.

But I will say I learned a lot because I, you know, someone had sent me the subreddit to. And it's just, you know, it's just, you know, you know, someone had sent me the subreddit to. And it's just. It's amazing. Men are incredible. That's what I'll say. Determined. Men are simply the most incredible of us all. And if you really don't... Anything to keep a woman out of your life.

Thank God. I'm so... Thank you so much, Rob, for pulling up the book called Self-Suck Hotel by Ethan Haney. You don't need a hotel. Yeah, honestly. You could self-suck anywhere. I'm not paying to be self-sucked.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's I say? When he gets a hotel room for himself for a night, a college student, Dylan Turner plans to indulge at his favorite pastime, sucking his own dick. You could do that at home. You don't need a whole book. Yeah, dude.

That's not a book. Yeah, how long is that? It's just like... It better be a leaflet. An inch. You know what? Coax or two the dick. Not one one star reviews.

Not one... Everyone really like this author. Three inch. Four stars. Hot. This is only a Kindle, though. Yeah. So anyone...

So you could jerk off at work. Two stars. Short Suck Hotel. Yeah, that person's mad at how short it was any. This was a novel concept for me anyway. Yeah, he said it didn't involve. He said the concept didn't evolve. Yeah, yeah.

That's the problem, is that? Well, if we start with self-sucking, where do we go after that? I actually felt that the man, the drifter from outside was kind of a hat on a self-sucking dick. Four stars from Gilberto Del Rio. Oh, my girth. Wow, very intense sex depicted in this lustful story. I was erect the entire time so hot. and sexy, definitely

recommend two my friends. Hey, Gilberto, thanks for the recommendation. No more, please. Three people found it helpful, Henry. It's not for you. That was his two friends. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was him and his two friends. Oh, yeah, yeah. Well, guys, we learned a lot today, and I just want to say, Eddie, thank you for sharing your vulnerability.

Yeah, whatever. And I just love the fact that Eddie and I are too big to suck her own dicks. And I laugh at even just the idea of Eddie and I try to suck her own dicks because even just in a playful, funny way, I tried to do it and hurt me to the point where I had to go to the doctor. I can't really touch my toes. Yeah, I just going to live the fact knowing. I don't want to suck my own dick.

I'm not even really that curious about it, but also, thankfully, if I had to do it, it would have to be done on purpose by a muscle mommy. And I do think at that point, a lot of other things have really kind of become questionable. Well, those people don't suck their own dick. They just got shot it. To me...

Anyone can eat their own cup. The lady forcing the penis insurement. mouth and then jerking you off in your own mouth is like, oh, to me, gonna just be hard coming back from. God, I miss you, Tutsi. Oh, baby girl, you were so good to me. She never did that once. She never did that once. Go to pictureon.com slash, slash podcast and left.

See Ed's grief. Yeah. Over on Netflix. If you go on Netflix, you'll see Ed's open grief. You'll see it. Enjoy his grief. Honestly, revel in it. It's good to do attack a clown when they're down.

It's the best time to get a clown. and go at LP on the left for all our social media needs and go over to YouTube for ITGX2. It is coming out. We're in the playoffs. The playoffs are out. Don, dude. We're fucking hitting the finals.

Two episodes, the finals. It's huge. Fucking ready to go. You are going. It's you versus my wife. I'm going to beat the shit out of your wife. Also, shout out to Tutsi who died on television in HGX2 in the first season. Amen.

We milked it all. We milked it all. We really did. But yeah, the HGX2 is honestly, I don't know how else to promo this show. It's one of the funniest things I've ever done. Yes, it's one of the best edited things we've ever done. We have like editors from Adult Swim sitting there working on this thing. Go and watch it for the whole second season.

The whole first season's good, but the second season really fucking hums along. We're really good. You can burn through the whole, you can binge the whole thing in the night, get ready for the finals. It's like everything, you have no idea what's coming. It's going to be so much fun. dude yes you gotta check it out over on the youtube it'll be in tv it's over there and go check out someplace underneath lpian romansy the foreign report and no dogs and spaces over there and brider scott's got new videos as well that's right man we got all kinds of shit brighter side is

full on go to the brighterside lpn on youtube subscribe follow it's a great way to watch amber ashley and julia and i have some fun and then go see me on the road i'm touring i got lots of live stand-up shows coming up i'm gonna be in bethlehem p a newark i just just dropped a dated city winery with Kirst and Michelle Sills over at, uh, in Manhattan. That's going to be a lot of fun. That's going to be on July 13th. And I'm going to be in D.C., Denver. Uh, we got all a plano.

I'm all over the place. Just go to edutons.com and check out when you can see me. Oh, and the Disney show's coming back. Dead men tell some tales. That's going to be a dynasty typewriter on August 16th as a way is to tell the D23 Fest to go fuck itself. Yeah. Which I'm very excited about.

So Dan's going to come. back out to L.A. for that. And then Henry and I are going to be at the comedy store. Yeah, I can't wait. July 26th in the belly room. So get tickets for all that. It's going to be a lot of fun. It's all definitely going to sell out. We're going to be super offensive. Yes, well, you know, it's the comedy store.

You've got to be super offensive. We're going to come for everybody. That's right, folks. I love you all. And go suck yourself. Go suck yourself. And hail Tutsi. Hail Satan. Peace.