Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: Transpoopanism

Episode Date: May 25, 2022

Ben 'n' Henry bring you this week's true crime stories including the truth behind Fecal Transplants, Transpoopanism, the pediatrician who hired a hitman, the Florida woman who dumped pee on a neighbor over chicken poop, the breast feeding hero who saved her pet goose from bald eagle attack, chicken war update, Listener Stories, and MORE!

There's no place to escape to this is the last time on the left side story That's when the cannibalism started Totally natural Oh, you're finally revealing your true voice to the audience You guys meet the character Henry Zabrowski, but the real Henry Zabrowski here sounds like this Oh bus stop Henry Zabrowski. I You know what? How simple would it be? To just live at the bus stop. I think it's extremely difficult given the threats of violence the constant having to protect your tushy

Oh, no, no and not to mention dealing with everybody who's upset the greyhound is late No, you're out there the hot chick with the bread always comes by and she's like and she's singing her song about how she reads all the time all the time because she's the only nerd in town for some reason and you're at the bus stop She gets the baguettes for free. Of course. You fucking hot chick. What do you get? No one brought anything to you You're obviously starving sitting on the bus right bus stop with your hands up your ass Have you been to a bus stop before uh one time welcome to side stories everyone I am Ben hanging out with bus stop Henry Zabrowski. That is me and uh, I am just so happy to be back We're gonna spread a little bit of laughter today

You know what we say before the show each time and this is I think it's important for you to remember every single time We look dead into each other's eyes. We get about an inch away from each other's mouth. So we say this time Let's have fun with it. Let's have fun with because I'm seeing a lot of messaging about the new David Cronenberg film Okay, what's this about? It's called. I believe it's called Cinema of the new flesh. Hold on. Let me look this up David Cronenberg so cool Because everybody's talking about it because they're in con they're on the con thing Well, let me see what the name of this movie is by the way, tom cruz is back He went to cans and he won a dipshit award. I forget what's the name of the award the the pepe lapieu a palm dionk

A palm dionk which I just did to myself all weekend long. Hello Hello crimes of the future. It's called and the thing is I don't know if I've ever told this story on the show No, did I ever tell you the story by the time I saw his butthole David Cronenberg? I've never said this on the show. No, did it look like the fly? No, I I'm haunted by this because his image keeps coming up and I I remember this is this is an innocent exchange. I would assume. Okay. Yeah, so I was in Toronto Canada right and not Toronto, Maine not to brag, but I was in Toronto And I thought it would be fun to play a little prank on one of my co-workers at the time I was working on a show that was that some of you have hilariously called heroes stillborn. Yes heroes reborn, of course the fantastic

It was not your fault. You did great. Whoever did the effects for the video game That's what kind of brought people out. I don't want to get into it But also I feel like heroes stillborn is really sad. I actually wish they went ahead and just aborted it and flushed it But I went to do this funny little prank Old Burger King abortion. Oh, yes, drive by I was it was Ryan Guzman my friend very handsome And I did a funny little prank on him and then he was coming back. I I basically what was the funny prank? He had what he said was a what he viewed as an unstable ex-girlfriend

So I took a bunch of lipstick and I wrote all over the mirrors and also the inside of his trailer I found you. I can't wait to be with you. I found you. We're gonna be together forever. Are you Jared Leto pretending to be the joker? What happened you call crazy? I wasn't in character I was having a good time and so but then when he came back early it was like Oh, so I thought I would nimbly jump over the trailer hitch between the trailers and I missed it And I gouged a full two inches of meat out of the shin of my leg Karma karma seriously and so I had to go to the Hollywood doctor in Toronto, right? So I went to the Hollywood doctor. They just bring you in there because I need to get a tetanus shot

Because I haven't had tetanus shot in a long time and I went in the Canadian woman the front very pleasant A dumpling of a woman. Oh, she was just like oh, well your doctor is ready for you Yeah, you could just go right back there go right back there Yeah, and so I sauntered back in and I opened the door and as I opened the door I go Hey, this is Henry Zabrowski and I look and I see oh an old man Is bent over the table His butt is spread wide with the white hair like literally like Like a if you scared a koala to death, you know what I mean? It just went white

That's what it looked like from the bottom down And I mama I looked straight into talking about body horror. Yeah I look straight into this old man's butthole and literally the doctor like turned around And as the doctor turned around and I said, hello, my name is Henry Zabrowski I then also looked into the eyes of the man. I like, you know, you take it all in sure You're taking all the information to pass the president and the future I zoomed into the butthole and then it zoomed into the doctor looking at me Like absolutely started while I'm there and then zoomed in on the man

As he turned around and looked me dead in the eyes and I was like, that's a claim director David Cronenberg Wow, like I know for a fact and I just I saw I saw and he's just like Just stern the look on his face being like because he's seen it all and he's known at all in his mind He has not seen a young Polish actor staring at his asshole as he is in a medical position Probably feeling vulnerable very well with him. I would say can you not be so Canadian right now lock the door They just let me in there and you know, it's weird when he's bent over I saw this little light in the very center of his butthole Yeah, it's his mouth

inner space, yeah But I It was it was rough and so I left, you know, obviously slam the door went and sit back at me You didn't say like I love your work, sir. Well, I didn't know what what do you do? What do you say? You couldn't be like nice. We're like, hell. Yeah, I know you better than your wife now And then I went and I sat in the in front in the front room and he came out and he did acknowledge me But the only way to really describe it because it's David Cronenberg. So he's very like Yes, like he has this like like not solemn not on his face and

Well, I feel like he should cast you on something you guys know each other so intimately I haven't gotten a call back from a casting director in about three years Well, that's fine because usually the callbacks are just telling telling you that the casting director that cast you died And now they're going with somebody else Because that's basically the story of our lives. Well speaking of buttholes We did talk about fecal transplants on the last episode And my god, did we get a bunch of dms from people who have poo poo related? Situations down there and they've had the fecal transplant and they swear by it. I guess I don't know

Where are we at in this country? Not only because the poo poo is like let's be super basic about this. Sure. Shit's trying to get out of you, right? Right, it's desperately looking for freedom Unless it's not unless you're John Wade and they're just trying to make a little apartment complex out of you And then eventually it'll kill you like most tenants. That's colon cancer. Exactly. But Most of the time shit's trying to get out of you all these people saying hey, but you actually know how you can stay Healthy is that we can actually shove shit right back up in you and then I guess It's like that movie tenet. Everything's in reverse

We are doing for this week to the spoiler alert We're going back to working on our transhumanism series this week We're going back into it and just this idea of you know doctors and scientists are just How can you be so optimistic you could kill everyone? You know like this idea that you're so like you know what to do so solidly like we're definitely gonna throw some old shit up there We're definitely gonna take what they because they view our shit like as elderly Well, they don't they don't see it as pizza. Uh, they don't see it as you know The former Arby's curly fries that we consume to make said shit

They see it for its microbiotics and as a matter of fact what I've learned is they found out the fecal transplants are good Because they did the research on mice. Yes, which means they were just taking little little shit I'm going to school. I'm gonna be a scientist and everyone takes their hats off and they say oh Congratulations, what do you do all day? You put poop in a mouse all of a sudden you're the scientist and when I do it I'm a creep. I'm a serial killer. Yeah, exactly God they're saying is apparently what they can do and and I guess this is true They're gonna do with this this idea of fecal therapy fecal transplant where they take little poop massage What a great day to be a turd. I don't know man rubbed. No, I think I ah like mr. Hanky

SideStoriesLPOTLGmail.com. Do you think a turd is happier in or out of the butt? I think they're happier out. I think they don't want to be free But they say that like which I don't particularly understand still that you could take a young duke Yeah, young poop put it up inside of you and then you get healthier and it helps you reverse age like it's time travel Like literally the shit like but then my thing is like let's say I saved Let's say I saved the lump of shit from when I was 12. You tell me if I had that saved and we went reactivated by like soaking in water Like you do with ancho chilies. Absolutely or those fun things you can get that just look like a little pill But then you put it in water turns into a dinosaur. Sure. You could do if that was that but with shit and I put it up inside of me Would I all of a sudden be like am I getting the front hairs back? I'm gonna go back to playing the star in a roommate

Well according to the surgeries that they've done or experiments rather the microbes that they've done They reduced inflammation in the brain and they also said it it helped with key proteins They got a bunch of proteins back in there, and I don't know this is according to the squad room Institute They said this is a groundbreaking study. He's fine. And it provides quote tantalizing evidence. I don't like the term Because I hate it you're acting like this is what I'm like. No, we're not finding out a new panty material tantalizing It's tantalizing evidence for the direct involvement of gut microbes in aging and the functional decline of the brain So there you go. It's supposed to work. So I guess you are what you eat straight poops all bad Yeah, it's talking about if you are you what you eat you really are like your gut health really means a lot

I've been talking about with Sina quite a bit Sina guys I'm not talking about how like because he eats yogurt every day, and he says that helps him Yeah, is that good? He pours about two bottles of red wine on top of it. So I don't think that But all of us the same thing like now I'm taking I'm trying to take my health more seriously Obviously looking at like, you know Marcus is coming back from he's got the long COVID We've been thinking about like how especially because we've been working on this transhumanism episode It was a great Kurtz file who is the idea he has this piece propagated the idea that AI Will be just as functional as the human brain by the year 2049, which is like yeah, good luck

Very freakin scary stuff in some ways people are still dying at amusement parks. You know, I mean well that'll never change No, but you know, he's saying that we're gonna, you know the singularity will happen human robots will then immediately Transcend us an exponential faster, but right Kurtz while it's all about because his daddy died He wants to see his father He won't see his father, but he's been trying to take care of his health because he's saying that the human body can naturally Be I mean this is real rogue. I mean, I don't think this is God. This is not true Okay, but he believes that the human body could extend its own meat space life to about 150 years Why not so sure and he's saying that you get the joints in the

Too sure we can live to 100 now. I mean people live to 100 in the 1800 Yeah, they live to 100 now and they look like traveling ghosts Did you see dick Van Dyke with his younger girlfriend who yes is 30 years younger, which means she's still 70 years old Hey, man, she's still got it and he looks like he does finally look like a chimney sweet Looks like a dancing skeleton, but he's smiling. Let me clean up your chimneys So scary but what Ray Kurtz while I was doing is so he's I added vitamins to my diet That's what he said. You got to add you got to put vitamins in your diet. He had exercise. So I've been taking all of this shit You didn't need you didn't need this guy to tell you that everyone knows vitamins

I'm trying to make it to my exoskeleton. I know I'm trying to make it to my I'm gonna get there, but what he's saying is he put old stuff in it. So I was like, okay What do I do and I looked up like vitamins? I think you know what are vitamins? So I got these fucking does the um was a oil of oregano Fish oil. This is no, no, not fish oil. It's oil oregano So they say it's supposed to help your body of oregano. That's what it is But guess what it makes each one of my pisses in my shit smell like delicious pizza sauce You know when you take that honey, what are you doing in there? Are you making pizza? Yeah

Yeah, do you know why don't you put some of that inside me? Yeah, but no I feel like so I took that and I try to take the garlic supplement, which should I just Turning yourself into an Italian. I literally just became an Italian fucking Fitness trainer. How is this healthy? I don't know, but I guess so it's side stories LP ot l a gmail.com What vitamins should I be taking in order to make it to my exo and myself as well? I need to get healthy. I'm taking course course. It's in, you know, my new home is near a tie It Mu tie Muay Thai not more time. So I'm gonna do Muay Thai You wait I'm gonna get I'm gonna start beating up Joe Rogan because he's still very tiny. Yeah, he's strong

He's tiny you see he's got a good spin kick But I feel like if you can take the kick and you get in there and you match his head up against the fucking wall And shit and just be like, you don't understand I'm fueled by rage. You don't got the reason I got your soul now, buddy Also, thank you to Dan Soder. He mentioned this on Joe Rogan and it was very sweet to see Joe Rogan not acknowledged Anyway, when it comes to the poopoo You got to be safe because it can change there's a lot of different stuff that happy this bacteria virus is fun guy This is alternative health Man and Henry like well, I mean this is according to the Quadram Institute again. What is that? It's tantalizing

It's not tantalizing. It's it's reverse dookie. I don't want to be Crass and I certainly don't want to be problematic. No, no, no, but do we have to start arresting these scientists? Because what are they doing in these labs? What are they doing? I just at least be threatened with a hand with handcuffs been like yes All right, if you say one more thing about putting shit back up inside of our butts, you're gonna arrest you. I'm Dr. Perky Pine. I'm a teamwork with this. Hey I just feel like they're the Milton's of the entire hospital like you don't want to go to the seventh floor That's the shit unit. They're really bizarre. Do they make HR look handsome? Oh

God, all right, let's get into some real fucking news. Absolutely A roast as dark as the night perfect for fueling the cryptid research and mad ravings required for your Podcasting don't mind the red eyes. He's just trying to warn you of the bridge The bridge finally from the caffeine-addled brains of Spring Hill Jack coffee and last podcast on the left Bre bring you moth men's red-eye blend. Yes Delicious Panama beans go to last podcast merch calm to order yours today But now this is I'll do this real quick again How many fucking times do we need to say it on the show and everywhere possible if you were talking to a hitman on the phone?

It is literally never once ever ever ever never never ever ever hit man Not you I'm just gonna say this again If you want somebody murdered you're gonna have to do the old-fashioned American way and you have to do it yourself Do it yourself and if you're smart, you'll get away with it But honestly odds are you won't so just remember divorce is legal divorce is legal and always just leave and not to be anything Good, maybe this is good. We're gonna get into good controversial territory here Especially if you're a lady and you're a lady in the environment you get off a lot better on the divorce proceedings if you just know how to do like

You Obviously it takes a lot of evidence it does so here we go This is a this is a pediatrician a Louisville pediatrician was accused of trying to hire a hitman to kill her ex-husband Um, wait a second. They already already got the board. See you got to let it go Just they say if you love something let it go if it comes back then it's meant to be otherwise I don't know just go have sex with somebody else or it's stalking. Yeah Yeah, sometimes you have to really truly legally let it go She should have just been like we talked about this on a little bit

I think on the last radio show but the idea of like sometimes like you need a check out You need to find a place where you can go get get dick sure pussy wherever you get get your pussy When we were in Indianapolis, we saw a 56 or 54 year old woman. She was the horniest woman We have met in our entire life. I have never met We've never met a hornier woman in our life. We sat down and she said, oh, yeah, the reason I come here last time I was here. There's only five girls to all the men She and I went home with the 29 year old and I was so proud of her and I could smell her pussy She was just ready to go and I immediately and we're both like ma'am

You are you're something special well You were a little bit like is this gonna do it because I was at the same way when I was speaking to that grandmother at the other Bar where I was like, I was just relating to her and yes, was there a moment where I was like I'm gonna have sex with this grandmother. She was very cute I was kind of excited because I was just like, holy fucking shit. Kissel's gonna bang this indie nurse I don't know. We're like, but it's fine. I'm she lovely woman. She was love. No, honestly No, she ended up saying a bunch of terrible things later on. Oh, yeah, she was a racist. We had to leave her alone. Yeah But

We still managed to have a good time and everybody that actually saw us after our postpone show I vote was the name of that bar. Oh my goodness lumpy to the slippy con Scrat never mind the slipper I was gonna I was thinking like slippery noodles Yes, the slippery noodle and so I was thinking slippery dump. Anyway, whatever. It was called the slippery noodle and Yes, but that place. Wow. Yeah, there's slurpy noodle and it was a horrible name for a bar But it was very effective. We watched the game and everyone in the game was very sweet bartender was lovely everybody who came and hung out with us It was lovely. I'm gonna get back to this. So Stephanie Russell is the pediatrician now. She did the thing

She believed she hired someone on a Sunday. Honestly, that's also hit man's day off. Absolutely It's the Lord's day because you're in church. That's so true though. A hit man always is kissing the cross They're always like Mother Teresa. I love Mother Teresa I gotta go down. I gotta see my mother. I gotta give a little kiss. I gotta bring the braggiole to Rita It's the yin and yang. Yes. Um, so this was a Norden commons was a very affluent neighborhood that this doctor was a pediatrician Obviously hooked it up online They talked about it and this is the thing that really like shows you again. Why it's not real She paid only seven thousand dollars for a murder. Oh my god

And I do believe that this is this is how like when you go to properly negotiate your salary when you go into a job You should look at kind of like the history of like what things cost all this kind of shit I I can imagine you're not getting a murder for less than 25 g's. That's right because I believe we actually got an email saying something Similar to that where it's like 25 grand upwards of hundreds of thousands of dollars depending on the person seven grand I am sorry It's actually offensive if you're gonna put a hit out on me and you're only gonna pay seven fucking grand What's wrong? That's how little respect you have for me. It's just so rude if you're gonna kill me

Anyway, at least it should hurt your pocketbook a little bit more than that It should be at least half the down payment on a house. Absolutely. She was also a uh, she was a pediatrician at kids life Pediatrics KID z and I'm just gonna say this not everything has to be fun. No kids life It's it's a doctor. It's a hospital for kids. Maybe they have cancer and stuff like that Every single time you have to bring your cancelled riddle child into kids run You're gonna be like, you know what? I'm not I'm not taking him to the ball pit today. His bones will fracture But she only put so she she paid half up front She put $3,500 in a dropbox outside of her medical office

So she put it where you go to pick up your prescriptions. Um, and then uh, uh, they tried calling the office. They have no fucking clue People went to go visit her that day. She disappeared. Yes. She just no showed on her on her job Which is difficult as a pediatrician. Absolutely. And this woman's name was Stephanie Russell And so Stephanie Russell. So she said, okay, here's 3,500 bucks. It's in a dropbox. Don't even worry about it Um, according to Lance Dooley who lives in the Norton Commons Who has two daughters who have been cared for by Russell since they were born They say she's been their primary care provider for six years. So it's freaky It is that she put a hit out on her ex-husband freaky. Indeed. Do you trust that it's a bit freaky?

It's a bit freaky Do you trust the doctor more or less because you know for a fact she has the Desire to kill but exactly she hasn't Well, I you know because it's like everyone who always says oh, they are so good. They did such a they're such nice people But like if they have no option other than to be nice, that's why like for me like I work I'm really working on it. I want to be nicer. I want to take care of people But like my brain is like kill kill kill kill. Yes pillage, right? So it's hard and I'm working on it It just takes you know takes, you know, but if you're just like someone who is constantly struggling man

This is a struggle of us trying to like understand that you have to like you have to form your way into society So yes, do we have to in many ways? I do believe like functional Psychotics are actually some of the most successful members of our society, right? Like because they have a goal which is why they talk about like things like a surgeon or a pilot high-pressure jobs Quite often serve somebody that has something like a form of anti social personality disorder Oh my god Like that one pilot that was depressed in Germany and ran his freaking plane into a mountain

That's not functional. That was bad the idea of being able to like, you know Separate the whole world from your job is a thing that's really important. Yeah, and you know, sometimes, you know, whatever It's it probably helps to have some empathy But also like it keeps you focused the one thing that this pediatrician didn't have was focus Because that's what it shows being like so I'm here with my kid. He's got um He can't beat mario galaxy fast enough for me. That's massive a problem Maybe maybe a case of the gout because I think they have lobster lunchables now I don't know what kids kids problems are and she's in there

And you think she's in there looking at his thumbs to see if his twitch reflexes are strong enough So he can become a professional gamer. You're just talking about holding me kneeling. I Wish he was at the level to be professional But then the attrition is not even thinking about your fucking son stumps, right? She's got her head in a million other places thinking about all the different ways She's going to set up all these rude goldberg traps for her ex-husband. Indeed. She's a regular jigsaw speaking of doctors Jigsaw certainly was at a doctor quite often because he suffered from cancer which makes him kind of empathetic in a sense That's what they do to us big mistake. She mixed business with pleasure always you can't have

Any drop-offs taking place at your job? This is what according to uh, uh, again Lance Dooley, this is what they say they say money drop-offs were happening right around the corner that freaks us out It's one of those things you just don't expect no and you really don't you really you're right You don't expect because if you did expect it you were planning a murder Yep, you were there you were a part of the process of of going you were going to do this murder Yeah, and according to Nancy Newman, you know what she she never thought anything like this would happen I why are we talking to these people? Well because why are we even asking them? Yeah, of course they don't well I mean again, no one says being like I hope my doctor is also a murderer

You never know she says it's shocking to say the least and it's very sad Just because it's very nice when you see a reputable establishment that's been around for several years One that you can actually recommend to other people I've had several friends that bring their children there. You know what this is like This is like on an obituary when they put like they love to laugh We're like Laughter is pleasant inherently unless you're going Over a dead body right the laughter is pleasant everybody loves to laugh

Of course you're a corner or makeup artist and you're happy with your work. You give them a nice smile and then you can laugh Why not I did we have fun with it? I mean dead again I feel like that that falls into the maniacal category of after you've made up the corpse and just go Incredible almost alive almost alive, but still very very dead. So anyway Uh, don't trust pediatricians. No never believe that you're actually speaking to a hit man No, uh, if you are divorced just check in with your ex and be like god Do you need plans or never think of him ever again or never think of them ever just move on go get that pussy Go get that dick eat some molly go to italy gain five pounds of carbs. Do you have to do?

Yes, anything but murder speaking of which if I had to change my dukey with one person's dukey I would change it with an italian's dukey because they eat so good. No, I want their mouth I don't want after they ate. I want to experience with my mouth. You don't eat the duke You put the I don't know. Anyway, I actually don't know. They just put it right back up your butt Buddy, this is why we have an email side stories lpotlgmail.com. Do they just put the poop right back up your butt? We're just really are crushing it today. This is great. This is great content every time I see a traffic cone. I'm like, you know what? Feel that Really pound it down in there. We really need to figure out how to go back on tour. Yeah, we do now big white bunnies

Now I wanted to talk about that since we brought up the story of a giant easter bunny I've actually received several emails and about giant rabbits if I recall when you read that email You did think it was just a person masturbating in a bunny suit outside of this girl's home I did now are you changing your tune a little bit? No, okay, but I'm still saying it's interesting to see how many giant rabbits people have seen and how like in this world of Like single-use cryptids like what we covered before like that concept of anomalous sightings It's still very much in the population and like it's I just find it. I find them But I do want to read this little story that we got sent from a listener about another bunny sighting

Which is because also there's an entity known as the puka that is a uh I believe it's a giant. It's a puka. It's like harvey the rabbit. What is a puka rabbit? Oh my goodness It looks absolutely horrifying. Um, this is a it's an irish fookler Uh, and it's awesome. It's sometimes also seen as a dark sleek horse I'm in a can turn into a giant rabbit and I believe that is the explanation for the rabbit harvey Um from the the old movie harvey with the enemies absolutely with the man who went to washington I forget the actress name very famous

Ripperd Ripperd Montalbont. Yes. Ripperd Montalbont one of the better actors to ever walk backwards And that's what the thing is. They always had to reverse the reveal So it appeared as he walked forward, but and even those haunting actions. We loved him tantalizing. Um, I am a 28 year old Female, but the time of this incident. I was in fourth grade and living on a military base with my family Okay, it was the night of easter when this occurred. Oh, you notice nobody saw fucking jesus Well, is now oh man, I'm so far removed easter is when jesus was He wakes up getting blunt when they do the leaves. That's when they roll the rock back And he's gone. They knew the joke on twitter that zombie jesus day. Yeah, didn't have any whatever being it's actually on every fucking year

It's easter. It's a holiday until we finally eradicate the oh wait. I did have it then. Yes. Oh Oh now during any holiday where gifts were left my sisters and I would all share a room to sleep over Mostly out of mutual excitement. That's cute. Yeah, right? I was always the one to wake up the earliest and out of excitement to peek at the presence and sneak back into bed Waiting for everyone to wake up. Oh, I love that. I was like that too. I was because I hate secrets I looked to get in there. Yeah, I could never sleep through the night on Christmas. I was too excited Always sitting watching always sitting watching but the nice thing is about growing up super religious We never believed in Santa Claus. Yeah, so you can be openly about like you didn't have to do the whole like

No, my parents procedure. Oh, my parents really wanted the uh, they wanted the accolade They wanted to be thanked. You're correct. They will correct. They didn't they nailed it. Um This Easter, however, I woke up to do the same creeping down the stairs To see a giant standing rabbit He was all white and his ears were long I was only at the top of the banister where you could peek and I saw it start to turn I remember feeling so terrified that I ran up the stairs and pulled the covers over me I could not move and only hope to fall asleep eventually

I did and then I woke up to quote-unquote Normal Easter. Why is that what people do? You know, especially as children if you're a child and you're listening turn it off number one It's an adult show Um, but don't hide under the covers everyone knows you're under the covers and if you're gonna be attacked Step step step step step. That's what I you just put your but you just make yourself a human ravioli Seriously, if I saw you travel, yeah, you'd be a death empanada So maybe just go I would say hide in the closet. Maybe it'll slightly safer scream again Always what you need is we learn from pirates the surprising

You see that bunny turn away dude. You go. Fuck you bunny. Fuck you barney get up in the creature's face You do technically in many ways that acroid was correct with ghostbusters with the get her Mentality only just because it's just gonna come and find you absolutely and if you know bunnies are exceptionally sensitive So be like you look pretty stupid in that dumb outfit bunny What you hop along your stupid egg laying piece of trash But you bang pots and pans together. There you go. But there's that story which is really fucked up I also have this other single use cryptid story that I wanted to talk about real quick before going to it It's like so this is the type of shit. It's weird. Obviously

Uh, people see things Your brains complete the the equation We but who knows what's on the other side of the equation because we know the reality is just comprised of whatever our rads and cones put together Absolutely connected to our brain I recently listened to your episode on one off cryptids And I heard you do a listener email, but someone's personal one off cryptid and remind me of this time almost 20 years ago When I witnessed the single strangest thing I've ever seen in my life I was 14 at the time when this happened and it was back when the

Brood ex cicadas started coming out on the east coast of the u.s. Very loud little creatures creep me out I was living in the dc metro area, uh, and they were out in force for a few months. They were everywhere Now my house is situated at the end of a neighborhood next to the main road that goes by it and because of that We have a good vantage point of the sidewalk that runs beside that road Uh-huh now during the height of my of the cicada season the power lines trees bus stop signs everything with any height We're always covered in screaming cicadas. Those things are freaking horrifying. Was it every 10 years 100 years or whatever the hell they are Soon they're gonna be cuisine. We're gonna start eating them Sometimes I'd wake up with a dozen or so or more on my window screaming right outside my room

And because of this my family thought it was crazy to go to try to go for a walk Since you couldn't walk anywhere without accidentally stepping on a few cicadas every other step Yeah, I mean have fun with it. Oh, yeah, sure. Yeah crash It's like that fantastic movie with the big bugs. You've got to keep starship starship troopers underrated film By the way, if you ever want to see a big bug vagina. Oh, yeah, check out that film. It's fucking sweet and it's a satire It is it's fantastic and brilliant now. There was this man That's when I saw it when I was on a walk There was this man at least he was a tall

Humanoid wearing a trench coat and a hat that could walk down the sidewalk by the road every day around 4 p.m Mm-hmm, then a few hours later. He'd walk back the way he came If walking outside with cicada corpses littering the sidewalks or wearing a heavy coat in the middle of summer wasn't odd enough He was also constantly being followed by hundreds of cicadas. They wouldn't land on him a king I guess so they wouldn't swarm on him They would just fly around or follow behind him like he was controlling them My parents would always call out to me say hey, look, it's cicada man Whoa, right as he walked by and I would run to the closest window to see him. So one day. I thought I'd try to follow him

Yeah, never a good idea and just to see if I could find out where he lived Or why the cicadas hung around him So I try to tell him for a good hundred or so feet behind trying to look like an inconspicuous Teenager playing outside hiding whenever he'd stopped to look at the cicadas not following you not following you definitely not following you Just a child. Okay. All right. He'd start to look at the cicadas and signs of power lines I followed him down the sidewalk behind my house around the neighborhood to this wooded area with the trail That connected to the other side of my neighborhood. This is where you need to stop following Oh, yes, and led all the way out to an outdoor mall that I'd always ride my bike to

I was familiar with the trail and I knew where every fork let out since I was so close to my house I didn't feel scared or lost or whatever when I went back there So this time was different though at some point I lost him in the woods And that's when I started to feel this feeling of dread Uh-oh surround me. It felt like cicadas had also gotten louder Like they wanted me out of the forest and I ran as fast as I could Right when it got home as quickly as possible and it was been a month or two later The cicadas started dying out cicada man stopped walking by with his cicada brood and we never saw him again for years

I eventually moved out from my parents house and moved to the midwest with the most recent brood X the merchants last year wasn't as large But when they emerged again back home My parents say they never saw cicada man again Very interesting perhaps the cicadas ate him I don't know what that is, but it is weird man. Also just remember straight up People are weird people are weird. All right. Well speaking of weird people. Let's get back to urine Uh, so this is an interesting story. I love it now according to the just judging by the mugshot This is a strong woman and she looks like one of those people who just really believes marriages between one man and one woman

Even though she looks like she might love another woman How do you think that she looks like mickey rork? She does. She is an exact second. Mickey Rooney. Mickey Rooney. Uh, so anyway, there were neighbors, right? Everyone has neighbors. Sure. Unless you unless you've killed them all. Yes Yes, then you have more than enough neighbors because you're in prison So neighbors kept on uh, they have these chickens, right? Yeah, and chickens are cute I'm still gonna eat them, but I do love the chicken and if you if you name a chicken you groom a chicken

I will not eat that chicken. That's your pet. Oh, yeah, we'll talk a little bit more about chickens soon So a neighbor's chicken kept on pooping in this chick's backyard Now a florida woman allegedly because of this Retrieved a bucket of pee from her bathroom, which I assume means that she was pissing in a bucket Instead of a toilet or the toilet the thing is that every time you piss in the toilet You have to say bye-bye to your pee pee Yeah, and that's got to be sad because you make all this pee pee anything Like oh like what will I do with all of it either like my friends or my family?

I can't just let this technically urine is the child of my bladder Well, just be very careful again while drinking so much urine it can affect the kidneys So make sure again like a sommelier spit it out. Mix some water in there Yes, indeed. So she says your chickens are shitting in my backyard So then of course she went to get this bucket of piss And then she doused her neighbor with the foul liquid. Her name is Christine Terman. She's 57 years Absolutely furious and she has now been charged with mr. Miener battery Mr. Miener everyone I say I say mr. Miener. I don't know but mr. Miener, whatever you try talking on radio forever

critics So she's been charged with the confrontation and the cops say the the victim Uh, Laurence stencil was really not doing well and quite upset So this is what this is what happened cops say Terman's Seeing it right was mad at the victim laurence stencil due to the chicken Yeah, they were all shitting on her porch Yeah, so termin went inside got the piss walked out uh to the back patio through the full bucket of piss Do they put the whole homicide squad on this is that they managed to retrace her steps?

Do they go and they locate her shoes make sure those who know her those were her footprints and the dirt Did they go and they taste the piss and have her piss in a little cup and then they'll be like yeah, that's hers All I'm saying is Christine you got the wrong victim here You should have dumped the piss on the chickens So the bucket struck stencil in the face causing him pain and now the sheriff's the sheriff's deputy He shows up and it's like no what's going on here another piss related incident And then uh, they knew that the victim was covered in piss because quote the victim was wet when when we arrived and smelled of urine So uh, that was that's how they knew and then we caught her yellow hand

Yeah, and then termin uh, she relayed she said yeah, I did it after being read her rights Yeah, she definitely did it because you probably also had some piss on her as well Yeah, termin's boyfriend kevin avry 59 years old was also arrested for threatening stencil in the presence Of the police which is you know, so this whole thing because of the chicken shit now I understand chicken shit in your backyards probably not the most fun But maybe the first thing you do say hey, can we get a chicken coop? Let's talk about this chickens Let's just address the chickens and talk about it how like, you know, maybe start with the conversation Right, let's build a rainbow bridge. Absolutely. This is a real stand your ground bathroom addition

I do think it could have been worse. Oh, obviously we hear about going We had a good shot her in the head and could have fucking Could have tied her up in the back of a human-sized cage and could cut her tits off and fucking and you know Electric you did. Yeah, there's so many other things you could have done. Yeah, well, I think the victim was a man judging by the name Still cut his tits off Cut his fucking tits off. Yes, indeed. I did torture him to death man. That's chicken his chickens on your house You know, of course, you want to hang up by his toes You want to bleed him out like he's a fucking prize hog

You wanted to take all that blood you want to fucking boil it into sausages and feed it to the neighborhood Sure, but actually and again, I'm actually I'm thankful. She went the piss route Yeah, you know, it could have been a lot worse and obviously she says your chickens are shitting in my backyard That ain't no chicken scratch to me. I'm pretty upset. So I'm gonna go drop some piss on you poop versus pee chicken shit versus human piss I understand where she's coming from to some degree, which I think is why it's only a misdemeanor But at the same time again, you got to live next to this person And now all of a sudden you're the neighbor who threw the piss on the other neighbor and the neverwind knows this This is the real this is a real shatfield and McCoy. It is it really is and but honestly the chickens are really a big deal

According to many people who got a lot of emails about these chickens about these island chickens Um, they said people one listener said I've lived on the islands of the Caribbean for most of my adult life And the chicken problem is also it's it's just a thing on all islands. Uh, they're everywhere They say he said the quote chickens are stupid big mean and cannibalistic Um, they chase dogs. They dig in the trash and eat dead bodies of their chicken friends They don't make it across the road. They literally will see watch them cannibalize them and then like and they basically He said you could eat these chickens, but they're also feeding on human detritus all day They're feeding on garbage and shit in all the chickens and cannibalizing these chickens. So, um, they're just garbage

They're just like fill their guts are filled with garbage So all those people in minneapolis protesting against the chicken slaughter because all the chickens got chicken disease Then we're gonna start killing people if people ate those leave it alone. It's not the biggest deal on earth It's also difficult on the prison problem. And apparently there are chicken lobbyists in hawaii I know we talked about this. There's a large chicken group who says we must protect the chickens at all costs But you know what like most people who virtue signal, I bet you they don't even live by the chickens I don't even think they know what it's like to be in these chicken communities. That's why I feel like these chicken lobbyists Oh, you want to be a lobbyist you should live in a chicken neighborhood. Absolutely. Well speaking of foul news

This is kind of an interesting story when it comes And and she was breastfeeding which is what a lucky day for the kid. I I breastfed until it was quite old. Oh, no Yeah, 14 14 years old. I believe I was I was three which is the reason why I actually find it is weird Whenever you do see a woman breastfeeding public, you're always like, can I have some gonna get into that? Yes, exactly Which is I feel like it could get us kicked out of some Delta lounges, but the one in LAX is so understanding I'll never forget when I was walking up Metropolitan Avenue when I lived in Williamsburg, Brooklyn There was a six-year-old seven-year-old standing on one of the little stoops there that would surround the trees

sucking us his mom's tit And uh, he looked at me and he was fully fully sent to you. Oh, yeah, it's a full-on human. Yeah I actually completely disagreed with that mother's. Um, I just disagreed with mom because also it was in front of all the other students who were playing outside for recess and then What's that and then just we were we were speaking with like people who do like the mommy fetish stuff A call in a call in on open lines a caller. Yeah, where do you think it comes from? That you see like hot mommy because of the thing too I just we were just in Williamsburg and I did happen to see you know, and I'm not staring

You know, maybe this is inappropriate to say no, but I was see, you know I was at a very nice little cafe getting a coffee and a very attractive Brooklyn mom Um pulls her booby out to feed again natural. It feels to me far too old Child, I don't know very long child Very long child and then that's fine though. Again, you should be allowed to you I don't think it's wrong, but also like but if I look at it What have I done? Am I bad if I see it? I tell like I'm not sitting there taking pictures of it No, you're allowed to see it, but you're not allowed to stare at it. Yeah, and I can't go like nice. No

Like somebody's got some lunch like I don't do that. I'm very I'm very Respectful of course very polite as a matter of fact this goose story is technically here of the week What? Yeah Yes, all right, let's do here of the week So a British columbian mom she's sitting there and she's just letting her kids suck on her tit to get all the milk out And then all of a sudden She sees an eagle right and this eagle is like I'm Wow, I'm hungry for a goddamn goose. I feel like it's Christmas, man

And I ain't celebrating eagles for the most part too, especially the type of bald eagles or scavengers Absolutely. So she's in the middle of breastfeeding her daughter who is six months old totally normal That is normal. Absolutely great. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I mean you could breastfeed. I say breastfeed all day Well, I mean, I think it would get quite sore and breastfeed everywhere Absolutely like improv everywhere have fun with it. Please stop Just stop improvying everywhere Improv in very specific theaters. So I know how to avoid it. Yes. Thank you So she's in the middle of breastfeeding

So the daughter is just like I'm almost getting far man And then uh, all of a sudden a couple of geese walk by and a number of chickens and oakley says, oh my god This is the name of the gal. Uh, kate oakley. She says, oh my goodness. Look at this Uh, there's there's an eagle and it swooped down and it tried to take the female goose And then oh my god, how horrible was that? So she said wait, so those are her pet goose. That's her pet goose She's probably feeding a lot of animals there. She's full of it. Yeah, so she's the goose She put the seed down or she bring the goose up for a sip on the left one I'm not even going to tell halda mcnealy about this because he can't get enough of the milk as a matter of fact

The doctor told him he had to stop So she says we've had hawks and eagles in our yard before but I never expected an eagle To be coming after our large 20 pound goose At some point you just gotta eat it, but I guess no, I don't know man. How can you I guess we're gonna get emails or whatever, but how do you kind of goose be a pet? I don't know how you can train a goose. I feel like they're vicious and they bite Well, I've seen some funny videos where a goose thinks it's a dog Anyway, I saw that video recently where the duck is going back and forth

That's just because it's just a moment in time where the dogs have decided to not Not destroy that duck. Yeah, so oakley was getting her baby daughter dressed and ready for bed when she saw franky Now that's the name of this big fucking goose See I'm you now. I'm you you give it three honks. It's Oakley said franky is notorious. We have her because she's an alert goose So she comes to our door when something's in the yard I feel like someone's about to get a bucket of piss If you have an alert goose an alert goose, so if something's in the yard, she's like

Ha ha something's in the yard. Who's the hero here? This is what we don't know So oakley said she knew something was up And then she heard franky calling and then she saw her and then she saw this eagle Wings flutter past the door and then she said oh my god She saw the eagle flutter and then she said it grabbed her by the neck But it startled it enough that it didn't get quite a good grip So I chased it up the driveway and let it go and franky came running home

Was the woman breastfeeding the whole time? Well, I think at this point the kid was full and ready for bed So why is this can I ask because there was a there's a part of me that thought that this was a story because she had the child latched And she was fighting an eagle. No, she had it But then the kid was like check please because what I would do is I would pull the tit I would pull child off tit squeeze child at eagle milk comes out of child at eagle vomit. That's a super sucker Absolutely. So she said it was very bizarre to see the eagle try to grab the goose But she said nothing. Yeah, it's just hunting

But she said no can do and then the goose was safe. So she named herself a hero Yes, and also she said and I think this is actually kind of offensive to her kids She says the goose quote is she says she's like my fourth child. I was terrified. So there you go Yeah, man, that's okay. Well, she didn't realize the moment was caught on camera until her husband went to look And indeed She was laughing. She said it was hysterical. We were laughing so hard And now the video has been shared thousands of times and she says people commented saying women can multitask and mamas are always on guard for everything You know women are special, you know, what else some people have called her what mother goose

Well, I think that again, you should be a lot of called you should be a lot of be called mother goose unless you are breastfeeding these geese Yeah, well, that's and also sometimes it's difficult to make your goose latch and you shouldn't be you shouldn't be criticized for that And you should be allowed, but absolutely. It's a little teeth I'm just saying you still if you feel emotionally connected to this goose enough to want to you want it to latch and it's frustrating at times Yes, because sometimes it's very difficult to make your goose latch Which is why you have to put little seeds up inside of your nipples so the goose can get in there and also formula is a really good option Absolutely Is that what your mom did just rub a little marinara sauce on there so you could finally latch

We know for a fact. I just didn't have the muscle build up to properly suck the milk through my mother's nipple Which is why I was a formula baby. And yeah Yes, it's maybe maybe more independent than others of course But also what that has done is given me the tools I need to survive in late-stage capitalism. Okay um Hey, what's up everyone? How you doing ben kissle here with henry sabrowski Yeah, it's me, man. Yeah, bro. Henry sabrowski is smoking some of that sweet last podcast on the left, babe Go out there and purchase yourself some. I hope you enjoy it

We have sativa we have indica and we have a hybrid and I have to tell you for my personal experience They are wonderful super tasty live resin. You really get the delicious weedy taste, which is what I like and three different experiences You go to your local vape store and get it. Absolutely. Thank you all so much for supporting the show We absolutely love you can't wait to see on the road and get that vape Put it in your brain and have a good time And if you want to set your favorite weed store, give them a call and ask for them by name last podcast on the left It's weed. Hail yourselves everyone. Hail Satan Also, just the final final story before we get to hear before we get to letters

Porno There was a priest it can't help 83 years old and he said fuck it. I'm done screw it all good He said I'm no longer a priest. I'm no longer a pastor He traded his role for preaching to the congregation Actually, this guy is also a hero and he said, you know what? I'm going to become a porn star 83 years old. This is true. He's a former priest from north carolina names norm self Which is a great name for a porn star. He was born for this So he believes sex should be treated as a joyous part of spiritual life and I agree with him

And so he's not to be anything, but he says his experience has been delightful Yeah, I find these days that my body's indeed a temple but intimacy and ecstasy into mingle I'm just so impressed. He can still get hard and still ejaculate. That's the thing It's getting hard on camera has got to be really really difficult. That's what they say. That's the hardest part It's the crew. It's the guy like with the boom-op. Just like Yeah, you got is he coming yet? Let me get the mic in there so I can hear it shoot out It's not easy to be a porn star. It is not so he also realized he was married to a gal for 30 years But then he was like, you know what? I am gay and so he came out which is so good for him

And I'm sorry. It took so long But I'm happy that he was able to find his truth at some point. Oh, he's gay and then it's good for him Honestly, that's probably like I feel like in a way. Maybe I'm wrong Like is there is it so much like do they do other things? What do you mean? What do you think they do Henry? Do you think they read books together and sip tea? It's very similar to straight porn, but just imagine different actors. So tell me You're from round town

No, a lot of times I'm on the railroad. Yeah. Well, it does sound like taxing. You sound like you could relax Yeah, it's not me. I'm the principal of my local Uh, duh, let's suck each other's dick. There. Well, now you got to the crux of this of the story So it took him another 20 years to come out publicly. Wow, that's huge. And then finally he made his porno debut in 2017 Damn, damn, damn. And uh, good for him. Yep. He says he says it's almost like having a party That's one of the things I admire about this way of doing porn. He doesn't like it that it's called porn That's what he said. He thinks that porn it's like there's like there should be a more gentle word for it like Romantuary. Yes. I mean, I guess so but also got my Roman stories

See the thing instead of changing the name porn just normalize the term and then just that porn can't be that bad It's just not that bad. Yeah It's just the thing that every single human being watches and if they say that they don't watch it a lot of times It means it's because they're making some nefarious snuff films Absolutely, and of course do everything with moderation and don't have it interfere with your love life because it is uh It's a different era out there for the kids. Save your nut for your wife. Mm like a squirrel. Yep. All right So so far he's done his on-camera work free of charge Which is amazing. He just doesn't oh, yeah, dude. Oh, yeah, of course. He says like why wouldn't he was a priest for you?

You know, I mean, yeah, he's like no, no, I've done my time working like this is this is just fun for me Yes, he says he will he likes to call them erotic films Sure, but also normalize paying people who do porn too. They shouldn't be doing that shit for free. Absolutely not. All right All right, here we go. Also, if you've done porn in your past Run for office. It doesn't matter. We both we all have buttles. We all have we all we've all done it So it doesn't we don't understand it doesn't become normal until more people do Incorporated into their life like do the thing where you can come back and say like yes, obviously. Yes. I worked in pornography It is fine. You all masturbated to it. You love it. Absolutely. Here we go. Here's some listener emails

Let me set the stage for you It was around 11 p.m. When we were settling down Got a few drinks in us gonna smoke a few bowls You know that is get a few episodes of this week's obsession in Okay, you know what I mean? I don't know that one, but okay. Yeah. No, it's just like whatever show people watch shows Oh, I see you're just saying that as a term. You remember this new thing. It's crazy what the streamers are doing They're putting on a new episode of our show every week. Oh my god. Yes, so new. It's so It's called television. No. No, it's no. Okay

fucking assholes About 1115 my phone starts buzzing and glancing because at this point that was the middle of the hit hot and heavy makeup session Oh, sweet, bro. Well with a rosy Pamela. Yeah, your fucking name I hope that you did find love. I hope so too. I see it that it's an unknown number and ignore the call And over the course of the next 56 minutes This same unknown caller calls me over 37 times I actually did get one of the texts the other day that was like it was at around 1 a.m And I got this text. I was like, you met me at the moco lounge. You met me at the moco lounge

The thing be like you got a fake number my friend. Yes, indeed. Oh, that's so funny. That's sad It was really sad. It was really sad. Oh, it was scary at first and then I was like, uh-oh No, somebody met you at the moco lounge and it was not me. It was not me Um, so every once while, um, I answer every few times the call comes in Feeling weird about it. I go out to lock the front door and the back door So the first time I answered it sounded like an early 2000s tv fuzz and I hung up Second time around things got weird There was a voice on the other end asking questions that I couldn't make out even with the phone on speaker and connected to a bluetooth speaker

I hung up a few minutes go by and I couldn't resist and I'd answered again and this time the voices were a little clearer One lady was asking this other lady what she had witnessed The second lady replied that he grabbed me by the throat and was verbally abusive towards me The first lady thanks her for her cooperation and offers her a coffee. The phone call drops Moments later it rings again Elevator music is blaring on the other end after about 20 seconds allowed three second beep occurs as if it's the end of a recording Okay, followed by a piano melody of Frank Sinatra's fly me to the moon

The the phone clicks back over and the Frankie stops just as if it was kind of a hallucination The stern man's voice began to bark objections at who I'm assuming was a judge He starts yelling about a man named Stanley Powell whose death had just recently been brought to public in the last few weeks He was a local man who created a lot of jobs within the logging community here at the heart of the pacific northwest Okay, I hear a lot boom and the phone cuts off again. I let it go I let it ring go to voicemail over a dozen more times not once leaving a message I finally answer again only to hear what sounds like more courtroom chaos, but not the same case as before I've now been listening to this interrogation. I'm assuming I'm assuming for over an hour

Nothing is making any sense and none of the story bits line up at this point I've looked up the number It does not show up as a scam and it wasn't an overlap from a police scanner scanners we listened to I also I had my little police scanner app, which is really fun to listen to late at night Um A man keeps yelling over a lady about the children. What about the children? She needs to say the children call drops again Needless to say after these these calls after two hours

They're still coming in and there's still no actual person on the other end of the responding and every time I hang up It brings again within seconds if it's jigsaw. I just hope he knows that I don't have time for games Wow, that's just typing this message out. The number has called me over 60 times Well, I mean interestingly enough, so I searched stan powell stanley duane powell born july 4th 1934 dead september 6 2021 stanley was born in primeville, oregon and indeed he had a login company We are he where he started his own logging company in oregon in 1959 He moved to davill oregon where he started his company and when his sons mark and brent were old enough They worked alongside him stanley and levan his wife were able to purchase 40 acres

And build their home and lived there for 46 years stanley skip was a strong-willed man He liked hunting fishing bowling playing pool team roping playing a dying mysteriously I guess but yeah, anyway that does check out with that name the student has a logging company in or a dude It's really fun. So whatever that means. I mean, who knows like obviously There's still robo collars out there and things that kind of work on a on a kind of locked-in system Like they do that. They are technically illegal, but did people still do them technically for fun We we talked about how we got that weird mysterious star 69 Yeah, I used to be able to do that used to be able to do that the back when things were free. All right

Well, there it is. Thank you so much for sending your emails again side stories lpotl a gmail.com Keep on sending them and Henry will keep on reading them And I'll keep on reacting to when Henry reads them. I think that that is best. I think this is creepy with the stanley powell What are the odds? I have no clue. He's a lovely company. It's very very strange And again, we see a lot of high strangers through telephone So I'd love to give you if you have any of those in for any of those stories. I love reading them I don't get sick of them at lots. Sorry to resolve the otl a gmail.com This week we have

Brighter side live is doing Wednesday at the pack theater here in los angeles You should come and check it out and check out classy night out, which is also this sunday coming up here They also at the pack theater in los angeles. It's gonna be so much fun We're still we're gonna be out there yuck and strutting absolutely doing our fucking bullshit You got to live every day knowing for a fact that like Yeah, if you see you if you see a giant rabbit, right, right? We know they're out there. No, don't like but live Allowing yourself to know you might see it right open yourself up to it

Increase your periphery vision of your mind so that you can really think about the fact that like you could see a giant turtle Sure, you could see a fucking you got to be prepared. You got to really think about it right anything you want to make giant You've seen grimace. Yes, you remember grimace from from mcdonald's well if you saw him full wheel Anything you want to make real you have to be able to laugh With grimace Instead of like not worrying like I feel like everybody runs away. This is the problem. They see these cryptids and they run away They see that they freak out. They don't want to engage. They don't want to engage

I never realized grimace's name is grimace, which is very sad Well, it does sound like he's got he's got a thing lodged inside of him. Yeah, um, and that's why he's that You know again approach your single use scripted try to engage laugh with them say seven like lebron, huh? Yeah, say something like what's a gutter good opener? Oh, what's your sign? Absolutely, and you'll be like yield and you're like grimace. You still fucking got it fantastic And then love the fact that you have made friends with your single use cryptid You now have a pitch to bring to one of the big old streamers looking for content That's for content, especially netflix because yeah, they might be they might have just fired 150 people

They might be lowering what they said they might be they called it restricting their stream I love that netflix is a joke. No, it's a joke. They know it. That's a joke. I think it's funny Wow, so just getting you're making content that way. That's oc, baby I love it when large corporations blame password sharing for their demise as opposed to their own inept Uh, complete ineptitude. It's like telling me that I can't pre-rinse my Dishwashers Dishes we're putting the dishwasher because the reservoirs are running out and it's not because we insist on drinking all the milk In a desert and it's a desert and we don't belong here and they shouldn't be they shouldn't be

Putting pumping all this water into the almond milk. I got nipples. Can you milk me? You know, we keep trying and we'll never know but thank you guys so much Thank you for listening everybody. Hope you're doing well out there surviving and stay uh as positive I know things are tough for a lot of folks out there. So stay positive and we'll yes Try to keep on getting through this and don't worry. We'll be called home at some point. Just trying to make it natural I can't I say this to my eyes. It is out loud for myself because uh But seriously unable to buy a gun we joke about it

I really do think that we've said this before things are really fucking chaotic right now I I even want to say this as a disclaimer. We've experienced it Everybody I think is feeling the same fucking heat right now. There's a lot of there's a lot of fucking garbage flowing out Kind of feels like the problem they have in space where there's just so much garbage just floating around out there That you're going to collide with something no matter what that's just how it is Yeah, I read an article about that right before bed last night. Oh, he is really scary And then I had a dream I was talking to David Letterman and rush limbo at the same time It was really weird. Honestly, it would be interesting, but the green room would be unpleasant

Yeah, but I just want to say like we're here with you on the same exact trip We want to put as much vibes out there as possible. I will not pre-rinse my dishes if that's what the government wants I'm fine. I'm fine with it. I just want you know, I'm here to not cause more problems besides the personal chaos Of trying to change your fucking paradigm in your paradigm and understand that life's a little bit weirder than you want to be Absolutely. All right, everyone. Thank you so much for listening. Hey there salesman. Goose deletions. See you partners. All right This show is made possible by listeners like you Thanks to our ad sponsors You can support our shows by supporting them for more shows like the one you just listened to go to last podcast network.com