Last Podcast On The Left - Side Stories: Treasure Hunt

Episode Date: June 11, 2020

Ben 'n' Henry break down this week's true crime news: a billionaire tempts treasure hunters into a perilous adventure, an evening of urethral sounding goes awry, an incel blows himself up with a bomb intended for cheerleaders, and MUCH MORE.

There's no place to escape to. This is the last time on the left side stories Chubby boys with the chubby little toys That's you there with your chubby toy your iPhone 7. It's broken get a new phone. I'm gonna do this I'm gonna shame you on the show. You're gonna buy a new phone shame me for being a Conchie and just consumer it still works. Yes, it's slightly broken Shards of glass in my finger, but we keep having these fucking we have real phone calls We have business phone calls that you do answer on your phone, and it looks like you are fucking in the middle of an Insurrection like you are it's just smeared with Vaseline from your hand grease like you just gotta get a new phone

Well, that's a phone. It's gonna make me less smeared in hand. You've got to get a new phone I think this is more of an indictment on my personal hygiene You gotta wipe your hands to wipe the camera even I do and I'm wet Wow, what did not know shots fired folks And I and I'm rolling against a hellish rebuke today. I rolled against I roll underneath it I'm gonna stealth myself for fucking around it. I got a 40 and I'm gonna fucking roll my fucking stealth And I'm gonna go around it that hellish rebuke is in my pocket burning a hole in it right now I can pull it out at any time welcome to side stories everyone

I am Ben hanging out with Henry. Hope everyone is doing all right I hope everyone had as pleasant of a weekend as they possibly could have had Chubby boys and their chubby little toys I Don't think oh, you know, there's a lot on wrestle going on I don't know if people are having that pleasant of a weekend But I will say that I think that the cops should be more afraid of people and I think a part of what they should do and start Thinking about more just watch the documentary. I've we've already plugged this tread

About the the kill-doser. Oh, yes, this one's ain't if they're allowed to have tanks We should be allowed to have tanks. I think I could buy a tank But we either buy a tank and we have community tanks. There should be a community tank Next to the police tank where you can all have it. It's that this is in Marver's house This is a much better idea than robot cops now. You're really getting kiss a lawn board I can be the mouthpiece for this proposed plan every small town should have one civilian ran anti-aircraft Missile I'm fine. Did you see what's going on? There's drones over Michigan. They're slicing tires in Minneapolis

Henry you have never been more on point in your entire shirtless life. Yes, Henry is not wearing a shirt I'm not wearing a shot. I am staring at this bizarre Polish Italian man's hair It has no idea what it's doing, but it is definitely on his body It is like naturally forms into a sweater and naturally forms a little hole for my turtle like head And that's just for the way fucking the Lord made and that and I am blessed for that But I'm saying I have a tank. I have a tankman's body, right? I think they were like my father my father was a mariner a submarineer I have a submarineers body. I should be a little tube and again every community

And then what you do is every six months you vote to who gets to be the pilot. I love it. I Love it, of course I don't I and I'm gonna just say because I'm gonna go on the record saying I don't think the cops should have one I'm with you on that. So if we're gonna have fights I Want tank fights. I I hey buddy. It's not just a fun video game. It's now real life I am totally with you mr. Zabrowski very the hairiest semen of all time and you his son I think I nominate you

Henry Thomas Zabrowski The second you will be the first one to man said tank and I believe You could do a lot of damn it. Well, we'll see the war to home You gotta fucking get those treads out fucking I'm gonna I'm unfortunately. I might kill some dogs in the process and I don't want don't kill any dogs You gotta get out of the way to the trends. Well, of course, and I think they will they're very intuitive when it comes to warfare Speaking of not great weekends. We have been covering this story. What seems to be a Year and a half it might be a year. It might be a year

Yeah, absolutely Chad Daybell and Lori and Lori value of and Lori of Valo Whoo, the cops are finally starting to take a little bit of action This was one of those fun times I tried it We try to wait as long as possible before recording side stories so that we could get because it's always like fucking something Breaks as soon as we record you're like always want to talk about that But we got this right as we were sidelan into the studio Mm-hmm. Chad Daybell is arrested after human remains found at Idaho home. I want y'all to go back

We I can't recap it again Look up Chad Daybell look up Lori Valo to self-made profits that believe that they were the chosen ones It seemed to be that they viewed so many dead bodies are attached to this couple Yeah, Lori Valos kids have been missing now since September of last year Mm-hmm, but now with a fight this is breaking news Chad Daybell He has been arrested after human remains were found at his home in Rexburg, Idaho These kids have been missing. They said that they were on vacation. It's a long vacation I don't think kids should have vacation days from being kids because that called that's called being dead

Absolutely, of course, they were at Camp Crystal Lake if you take a look at what I would assume their corpses appear to be these days slashed and brutalized Brutalized unfortunately it has taken so long because the first time the cops raided Chad Daybell's home They weren't able to find anything my question is what was so difficult when it comes to finding human remains the first time Were they still sort of believing the story was Chad Daybell walking behind them and telling them where to go? Oh, you don't want to go in there That's where we keep all of our extra soap nothing to see like what was he doing to stop the cops from going into the area where their Children have their remains. Well, we don't know if they're the kids who remains yet

But we if they're not Henry if they're not the kids remains, then we're no another problem. I'm covering us legally I'm covering us. Don't worry. That's how I you know, I almost think of that But I don't I have you I just nominated you to dominate the police with a kill-dozer What I mean, but that's different. That's fucking I am a wartime general, right? I am I'm a I am a you That's what I do. I you know, I create distractions. That's mostly my job I agree right here Rexburg PD with the assistance of the FBI in the Fremont in the Fremont County Sheriff's Office are serving or Search warrant at Chad Daybell's home in Idaho. This is from Kim Powell Who is a reporter for AZ family in Phoenix, Arizona? Now, it seems like maybe they didn't have access to the entire farm

Maybe there was like something that we not really certain or maybe it's because the FBI is now involved, but it seems to be I mean several remains were found, but now he's on fuck He is in jail. Lori Vallow Cillen is now thankfully in jail They are finally at least caught and hopefully I hope that we can actually bring some rest to this story And these kids can actually be laid peacefully to rest because this is absolutely it's been a heartbreaking story But man the the fucking movie that's gonna come out of this shit is gonna be out of control This is gonna be a John Stamos feature not to dismiss your Stamos I believe he played one of the mr. Kissel's in the two mr. Kissel's

This is going to be a lifetime film This is this is never going to the big screen not day sign up to be this cult leader who also did you know this? Chad Daybell was a former grave digger Hey, man, I guess that he just went back to his alma mater And that's what he decided to do to fall back on his old college days. I get back to very in I've never heard of a cult leader I never heard of a grave digger turned cult leader before Joseph Joseph Smith man fuck my brother turned into fucking religious founder turned into the human prophet This is it we will we will see what happens, but you know that there's several layers of film, right?

You'll have the big film the big summer movie that'll come out with like Chad Daybell like played by like I'm gonna maybe say out there. I'm like who's a good one for Chad Daybell Tom Hanks No, he's Tom Hanks just played mr. Rogers Henry Why would he do actors are always looking for challenges look at Kevin James just played a serious neo-nazi in that movie Becky I don't well Kevin James He has comedic talent as we saw with this stand-up special switch about waiting in line for greeting cards It was very funny and you also did a great bit on muffins He also has a really funny bit where he says that he goes up

Someone asked him be sweating and they asked him if he was a jump doing jump rope in the attic and he says no Actually, I just peeled an orange. He has a funny material He's got some good bits, but you got Chad Daybell, so I would put her up there, right? I put Jed table maybe but but somebody like a Tom Hanks that level and then you got Lori Vallow. I'm gonna say In the lifetime movie Lori Vallow will be played by a recently released Lori law flit that's what I was gonna say as well because now she's hardened she understands She's probably learned a little bit about the criminal element. I think she's hotter now than ever. She did her time and Now I think it's a hasn't done it yet. Well, she's

Doing something she hopefully was the one that did the time out of the there's another one a Felicity Huffman I'm gonna go to jail. She went to one of them went to jail Felicity I believe went to jail whichever one went to jail you get the reward of now playing Lori Vallow in a lifetime movie Which oh my god, you think about the accolade that you could get with that You could win upwards of an Emmy and what's more exciting than an Emmy actually a daytime Emmy Because you know it's one about the daytime Emmy from what I've heard is that you can drink at the daytime Emmys and actually the prime Time Emmys even though they're fancy are actually quite boring because they don't serve any booze or food That's why it's never good to be successful

If you really look at people who go to the Oscars to use you see these award shows They're all bored as hell you you can't do anything because really you're just acting again And your role is to be a prop or an actor who is just lost the what's your name? Oh the Golden Globes is where you go to get hammered. That's where you go to get hammered So we'll find out Lori Vallow and I and I guess like for the prime time movie the big old movie Lori Vallow would probably be played by unfortunately a Scarlett Johansson because then they'll go younger dude. They'll go older Girl they'll go younger. All right. I got nothing wrong with Scar Joe. I'm sad black widow I wasn't come out because of this dang COVID

But hopefully that'll come out at some point soon not my favorite character, but also I'm here for it That's what I said. I'm here for it. Well, so we will keep you up to date on what's going on with Chad and Lori This is the biggest development that we've been able to cover because the cops have finally put these two behind bars Most likely where they belong at this point once you find human remains in that person's home And their children are on a nine-month vacation We can assume something has gone awry something has gone awry. Have you seen the new? Super cool street wear on the street called shield headwear.com. It's new it is this is not a fucking joke It is aluminum foil clothes

Uh-huh that they are selling to block you from any sort of energy weapon It's 5g so this is predicated upon the conspiracy of 5g another one And so we had several listeners that went and actually they guess someone did that 5g shield that like USB thing that was sold Apparently, there's nothing in it. There's literally nothing in it. Just a fucking plug, but this has got shoes They've got underwear. This is 39 euro. Oh my good for an aluminum foil beanie I'm looking at this is really really interesting. It's got eyewear. I don't know what that does It's good for the eyes. You can't let the 5g get in there. That's the direct passage to the to the mind I mean, that's just the railway tunnel to the brain

It's just open to still slapping against the fucking eyeballs Well, you never know what's gonna happen you mentioned technology Henry that reminded me of this story that we must cover About cell phone chargers. Do you know how you lose your cell phone charger all the time all the time? I have to be like when we're traveling. I'm always like looking for a charger I'm always just trying to find it. It's like, you know, how many of these I blow through five six seven a month I know I'm sitting in the back seat as we're driving to the next gig and I just hand a week And as soon as Henry starts doing his porky pig You have another charger. Oh my god. Yes, Jackie. Here's my charger. Sure

Yeah, yeah, that's your impression of me. I think that's interesting Yeah, so why do you bring that up? Well, may I recommend you do what this Indian man did? This is a recent story from the CNN wire only covering the most important news This dude went to the doctor. He said he had some abdominal pain. The doctors were like, I don't know man Take a diuretic, you know, maybe this is gonna help you out It turns out he has a sexual fetish where he puts things inside of his penis in this case He was able to shove a two foot Long phone charger cable into the front of his penis to the degree that it ended up in his bladder

There's a picture here that apparently these doctors just leak, which I don't like this if I go to the doctor This is irresponsible. This is irresponsible. There's no reason. There's no reason They have the answer in this story. This is this is KTLA 5 and I all I know is this is what keeps people who have jerbils or Any any form of modeling a modeling clay toy cars anything in their rectum or their or or their abdomen This is what stops them from going to the hospital because the doctors are just gonna laugh at you So the man visited the hospital in Northeastern India I do I like to spell this out because this is the thing guys. I Think that we should we're gonna say this is a public information message to all of our listeners. Absolutely when you go to the doctor

Yeah, there are things that you just just tell them straightforward, right? I learned I used to hide all my shit, but now I tell them being like yeah, I did trumes this weekend I did right I do weed I do weed and they're like Hell yeah, and then they fucking slap her head like how many times I go and then they put the reggae hat on me with the dreads Sown into him. You're a cool guy. So you you're there, huh? You're you've adulted to that point I'm slightly older than you, but I still have not adulted to the point where telling the doctor the truth is cool I still remember that I say the dumb stuff like you know, I jerked off for coming here today And they get upset. Yeah, that's a little strange

Especially when you go in there for their physical or for your physical although. I'm sure they appreciate that less risk of getting a bone I just want them to understand that don't worry. I'm not the guns not gonna accidentally go off this time Absolutely, you're not gonna be the second boyfriend to Jay to Joe Exotic in Tiger King. You're not gonna shoot your you're not gonna shoot his head off Fun it is fun to reminisce yeah It is when you go to the doctor because he showed up and he said that he said that he was experiencing abdominal pain So they gave him a bunch of laxatives and he fucking you just fucking Was you shitting and shitting and they don't understand it was going for five days for five days after five days Of laxatives and he said hey listen, we it's not coming out. I know what's happening to me

He then we're like alright We'll look at the day we're gonna have to do some form of x-ray on you and then they found the two feet of cable Coiled around like a serpent Inside of his bladder and it took a long time They had to go and fucking pull it out and they do was like if they said straight here if he had just been honest It would have saved us the trouble and we could have treated him sooner. Maybe he wanted to have the runs for five days Perhaps that's part of the sexual fetish as we've talked about It kind of feels good the first few times before you have to go to the bank and you have to do things in your life

It's like when you lose your cell phone the first five hours of you having your cell phone lost You do feel a little there's a small amount of liberation. There is less if I miss a text no fault on me If I don't get it out. I'm out of my mind. It's such a beautiful relief I don't have to deal with it anymore for a couple hours and then it immediately becomes crushing panic What's happening? What am I missing? High anxiety first first few hours stuck on the toilet. I'm not having the worst time I feel like I'm losing a little bit of weight and I'm like, oh, what's that? Oh, I have to meet my I have to meet my mother-in-law at Applebee's in an hour You know you're shitting you know you got two feet of fucking phone charger up your fucking tickhole

You're gonna have to go to that shit fucking shark taco into the sharkbone taco sure sure you that if you have a very fancy Mother-in-law, I mean, I just And you're sitting at Ponderosa knowing that you got that all bunched up right behind your people I also don't know how you're peeing although if you do go to Ponderosa and you do have a case of massive Diarrheal, they'll probably just make you the head chef So this was they conducted an endoscopy now My question here is and please if you have this fetish all good No harm no foul a little bit of a foul here and does seem like some harm has occurred

But for the most part he was the only victim and so everything is fine Would this not be? The pistil resul stones of the fetish getting the endoscopy getting getting getting Getting someone to go in there. You have a you have a team of doctors now. That's why I'm gonna show that hole I actually don't know. I don't actually really good question I don't know if this is was the actual aim of this or is the idea because in my mind I thought that sounding with the pleasure was in putting it in and Taking it out to me. That's why it's gonna say it's like you know when this is one of those classic cases of like

Don't you lose your string and your jogging pants? I hate that Never lose the string in the tip of your dick I always have a little nub and lawnmower yourself. I'm certain that that is the way I'm sure I thought that that's where the pleasure was but again, maybe I'm just some kind of white bread vanilla piece of shit Because I feel like the feeling of it tugging against the wall of your bladder Might be very interesting, you know, I don't know How you lose it? It seems extremely difficult. How do you?

Intentional look it's got a USB plug on the other side. How does it get lost? I have a feeling just looking at the picture that these doctors like because they have no respect for their patients at all It looks like he had cut that portion of it off and it was just why it's there buddy string That is why it's there Yeah, some people say oh it's because it attaches to the charger and and that's how we get the power and no It's there to keep it from sliding up inside of you like some form of crooked ass upside down spaghetti Yes, well according to the doctor. He said I have read the people used to get sexual gratification by inserting instruments through the penis I have read quote-unquote

This is one such case and then he goes on to say and the psychiatrist can help him beyond this point So apparently they think this guy needs psychiatric help Which because he did lose the string is going to put him that that you you got to talk to someone Just because you lost it inside of your bladder got to got to talk to someone Be safe now you've done it and maybe actually that's where the horniness comes in is telling him at the very end go I did it naughty. Oh, well now we're gonna have to cut open your fucking guts. That's exactly what they did do Yeah, all right, so this is a story that isn't this is another one of those I fucking love our show. This is a story that is out of control and it's also I have no clue what's going on

And it's the very beginning. Okay suspicious bizarre theory emerges on photo of missing mum and son and this is the story of a woman Felicity Love Day 83 she went missing with her son Adrienne Minnevau 56 It went missing in Milburn as they prepared to leave for a three-day what they called a Cleansing ritual on December 11th 2019. So this is a story from still like this They don't know where the hell this dude is right. All right. Wow. It's been a quite a while There's a picture that was taken by it believe By a member of their family

There's one last picture that shows the two of them on a boat which is this old kind of pontoon fucking rickety-ass looking boat That was she's 83 years old And they are pretty certain from the looks of this picture that the old woman that is in the chair is Dead already, right? She is very white Kind of propped up looking a little like Bernie, right a little bit kind of kept up with the life preserver We're in the engine Now what they don't know the this is where it gets really really strange It has emerged that Ms. Loveday was once a senior co-free masonry figure and served as what is called the worshipful

Master at a Southport, Queensland Lodge presiding over rituals and ceremonies in the mid-2000s So she is a part of this free Freemasonry group you see several pictures of her with the robes on and she was in charge of it Now the Sun okay, they were going to do what they called a cleansing ritual because Adrienne and Felicity This this this two men and that they are they are bosom buddies. They look like haunted roommates Because it's just roommates with your 83-year-old mother They said the Adrienne and Felicity were practicing meditation for some time and they believed that Felicity the 83-year-old woman Had awoken black magic in Adrienne He felt responsible for it and they said that the boat trip was a means of reversing it

So the boat trip was going to reverse all the black magic charms and you're right, Henry I'm looking at a picture now She looks a bit like grandma from national ampoules European vacation when she was in the chair atop the car It looks like the woman from don't tell mom the babysitter's dead. Yes. There's definitely in other words She looks very dead It's very very dead And so what they're saying is they went out to on the saltwater because that's how they would purify whatever ritual that

Well, they needed to do right so Mrs. Love Day's daughter Christina Love Day was the first was the last person to see her brother and mother at the Frankson boat ramp She told police that although she was initially concerned about the three-day trip She was reassured when her brother said he would keep in contact on this because she's 83 years old She had no reason to be in this rickety-ass little boat No December 13th She received a text message saying that they were having a quote-unquote good time

It sounds like they were getting hammered and having sex with each other which they shouldn't have because they this is not porn Up. No, they are fucking relatives. I haven't seen has pornhub um Amped up the game to granny fucks grandson at this point is that what we should also look at a porn hub to have a little bit Of a problem cleaning up their child porn problem as fast as humanly possible switch over to next videos This empty boat was found submerged about 20 kilometers from where the pair left Constable ops describe it as definitely not suitable for sleeping and for a three-day trip So they put in this little boat. So basically she had some form of advanced dementia

They don't know what they'll but they said they went up to but apparently mr. Meneval the Sun had purchased a second boat Shortly before the trip did not tell anybody that he had purchased a boat and that boat is also missing and so is the Sun They found the dub they found the boat the actual the little shitty boat that they were in they found it submerged in the water Did they do over the boat? Don't know where grandma is did they literally pull a thorough mama from the train, but the but the aquatic version of it Yeah, she got Osama bin Laden. Wow Unless she really did but I want to see this other movie on the other side of like well

What fucking portal did fucking him an old lady open up? There are demons everywhere that we don't know about it. Is that a part of the fight? Is that COVID? I mean you look at the time absolutely. We're talking late December I believe that's when it was starting to begin and spread throughout China And I believe that this woman is responsible for COVID But then shouldn't this have solved the entire problem they drowned her in salt water Theoretically that was supposed to solve the the entire pandemic Maybe she comes back like for mentioned Jason Voorhees. Perhaps she just resides down there

Maybe she's hanging out with the blooper Cthulhu. This might be the best option for her They could have just caused the end of the world by doing something so stupid as to drowning this witch Unless she went to join the old ones like you said now They are saying they kids little bit of fault it was found immediately was found afterwards and they are just are they are gone This dude is gone, and I'm gonna tell you what if she is not deceased in this picture. She's looking a little seasick So I think that immediately they should have been because like, you know Is he just lifting dead mom up and putting her in the boat and the sisters not saying anything being like I think mom Should be moving you know like I think mom should be like kicking or saying something to respond

And is he just doing the whole like we're doing fine, sonny like doing the old-school ventriloquism If he's a vaudevillian actor, I would give him a lot of credit for doing such in doing something so artistically valid I don't know. I mean either way Is he just like an island right now? Is he living like Tom Hanks and cast away is he painting little faces on? Basketballs and being friends with them perhaps having sex with them which Tom Hanks never did You say that I honestly do believe that he had sex with Wilson He at least read it on Wilson or Wilson watched him have sex with the fish

You don't think you don't think he turned Wilson's little ball head around, you know He did is to turn a ball around Just for his decency, so he wouldn't share his secrets Maybe If they ever find him lampooned at an island somewhere Oh, I don't know but now we're seeing so if you see a fucking Fucking gross dude with a really lumpy duffel bag somewhere in Adelaide Yeah, I'd give him I'd give him a little bit of check and if he tells you he's a wizard being like well

I'm gonna need to see your fucking keys of Solomon charts before I agree that you are a wizard I completely agree with you on that. Well speaking of wizards and COVID some people think Doctors are wizards as we talked about in them in the last relax fit episode. It is something magical, isn't it medicine? Well, what is it? It's not though. It's the opposite Well, it's still very magical There was a former Northwestern University professor now. He's in prison currently, but he would like to be released because He is a immunologist. He knows a lot about immunology

He fatally stabbed. Why is he in prison? It's because he fatally stabbed his boyfriend to fulfill an elaborate sexual fantasy Now he is saying I need to be released because I'm the only person that can cure people who have COVID I'm an immunologist. I'm a superhero in this world. That's what I do. Yeah, I fix these things So his defense attorney says I'm guessing this is according to his defense attorney Barry Shepard He says I'm guessing there's no other litigants that propose this to the court that their client Can possibly aid in a very significant matter He goes on to say this man is a leading immunologist and someone who knows lung infections better than anyone else Cook County Circuit judges Charles Byrne deferred his decision on whether to release Wyndham Latham

But we shall see all I know is If I got COVID I go to the doctor and I'd be like where'd you study medical school? And he's just like the yard the prison yard like I would just be like, you know what give me COVID I'm gonna see what I can do with COVID see if I can live I don't really want my doctor to be a person convicted of stabbing his boyfriend to death in a sexual Exploit gone wrong. But who would know the human body better than someone who ended a life? Because then he knows we're how far to take it and how far is too far I actually I don't know because it seems like his sexual fetish involves taking

His partner to the brink of death. You're in you. You why would I believe? He would even try to cure my COVID when the sicker I get the harder he gets and then I just have come on my face Right before I die because he ejaculates kissle. This is where your this thing is the come part comes when He then just manages to heal you. So yeah, it's a it's it's come. Okay It's fucking a little bit like a very uh, what's it's what's it's very, you know, who knows You're you're interesting defense of this doctor gone horribly wrong. I'd rather go to a dentist called dr. Giggles

He stabbed his partner trinton gornel durinlau 70 times and he did this in a high rise apartment. So you know this man He might not have the most he might not necessarily understand Boundaries very well and when I think of a doctor I don't like the Seinfeld episode where his doctor does molest him his dentist does actively the molest Jerry Seinfeld And it's a lull in a raffle. Yes in real life. I don't want horrible tragedy It means your whole life is shattered It's all shattered immediately if your dentist sucks your dick while you're asleep

Well, if you can't trust the doctor then then you're you're done because now we can't go to the doctor anymore Your doctor gonna fall out of your face. Oh, you're gonna fail. Everything's gonna fall apart I think that this guy I don't want this guy to be my doctor But I think that if you're a jail for white collar crimes or like one of those kind of more simple crimes And you learn to be a doctor in jail. I might take a stab at it. I remember I went to a dentist once in uh, And it's deep in Brooklyn and I went to a dentist and the the dentist He was um, he wasn't paying attention to me. He had to be I had no insurance at the time So I had to just like pay for whatever I could get attention to you. Yeah, you're no insurance actor

I'm garbage. I'm just a garbage piece of shit to this guy. I'm sitting in the chair and I distinctly remember He wasn't looking at me. He was literally absentmindedly stab in my mouth with the hook as he was watching um Fattest babies in America segment on I want to say it was morey povich I want to say it was and it was them with like a 90 pound four-year-old and he's just like that gets too fat Meanwhile, he's Viciously stabbing me to the point where I had to take his hands and I pulled the instruments out of my mouth And I was like I have to leave I have to go you are just cutting me

well In the doctor's defense, obviously you got to stop and watch that segment But the the key word is out and we'll all sit and roast it We'll all sit and enjoy it and talk about it and have a cup of coffee But you're in the middle of it actively lollygagging as if you got money on whether or not this kid was going to die by the Time it's 15 years old. Oh, definitely if they keep that weight up. Yeah, I missed those segments They would always present all they would put if they treated those kids like Donald Trump treated the national championship team They just got them like thousands of dollars

We're the burger king and McDonald's just put it all on the table in front of them Of course the two girls gonna eat it. He's a champion. So he doesn't know just so you know again this doctor He does seem a little bit scarier than even uh, I assumed before he lured his boyfriend up to the apartment Um, he said you don't need to lure your boyfriend. He lured him. He I don't know he doesn't need to lure him He's already there. He puts spam on a string and watched him slowly come up the stairs chasing said spam I have no idea. He doesn't need to lure me into having sex with her She just arrives with something vaguely with her me seeing the shape of her body and I'm ready to go

well He stood in the doorway, uh to the bedroom with his cell phone in hand as latham repeatedly stabbed cornell Uh, during light as he slept according to prosecutors latham had asked Warren to video record the killing Uh, but he never did that was another person that was involved in all of this As part of a plea deal this other dude Warren agreed to testify against latham in return for a recommendation from prosecutors That he only be sentenced to 45 years. We got multiple people involved in this tabbing. That's what I'm saying And now this doctor wants to get out and cure people

Maybe it's time for him to put his his knife blows Where they'll do best also surgery room They are they're saying Warren was a third party custodian, which I don't believe What is a third party custodian? Is that just a man with a broom? That's how that sounds like. I don't know. It just sounds like it's a man with a fucking It's just a man with a vendetta a bucket a mop and only one pair of pants And he doesn't wear pants when his pants are dirty, you know I don't know is if Andrew Warren that's this that's this man's full name the guy who is supposed to film but then

If he was a real custodian, I think he adds more value to society than this immunologist Who was obviously just going to kill people with covet because what do custodians do they clean and what do we need right now? Clean surfaces clean surfaces clean surfaces. We really do all right speaking of clean surfaces This guy will never have to deal with the surface ever again This is the FBI says a guy blew his hand off with the bomb possibly planned for an attack on quote-unquote Hot cheerleaders. This comes from buzzfeed news. Cole Corini told FBI agents. He had a lawnmower accident Um, which is a lot. That's like if you just um, I can see You know dwarf does lawn care. Yeah, and how scary that would be but when agents searched his home

They found blood and chunks of human flesh splattered on a bedroom wall this guy by the way if you haven't seen his mugshot he is Just beneath his eyes If he was the bottom of a pizza crust of a brick oven pizza crust That's a perfect crispy crust. You're gonna get that crunch You're gonna get that snap when you have to when you have to fold the triangle So you can get it in your mouth because you can't eat pizza with a knife and fork unless it's a deep dish We all know that he really has a good burn going. He looks like

An asshole He looks like a an a loony tune Person like blew up like it is like they didn't even try to fix them up So this 23 year old virgin man who appeared to be planning an incel bomb attack on hot cheerleaders That's just they're throwing in cell in there They they do throw the in cell in there But it's also like this whole idea of hot cheerleaders and this is not demeaning cheerleaders of any ilk But like I think it's more of a stereotype. A lot of times they're quite uh, you know attractive

They can't be attractive. They can't be attractive. They can't be at least if you are a cheerleader You are a representative of the team So you are you are fun. You're full of energy. You are athletic. You are Enthusiastic, I feel like you're making this you're you're basing this opinion off of porn as as you base many opinions off of And I am also guilty. I just don't know if that's the case anymore, but nonetheless It does not I love them. I love each one of them Got so the late Tuesday evening carini went to a medical center near his home in richlands, virginia with one hand missing Several fingers amputated and shrapnel wounds to his neck and throat

When asked if he remembered what happened to put him in the hospital authorities wrote in the criminal complaint Carini told the FBI agents that he was mowing his yard and the mower flipped over in such a way that it and this is added Dragged his hands into the blades and because the blades were spinning so fast It acted as a bomb, which is this is not again. This is not a wily e coyote scenario This is real life, but this is why you got to come up with that story Before you meet the FBI. This is He was in shock because he lost most of his hands because his shitty little riddler plan Went awry

So they discovered FBI agents searched his home They found a shocking scene a trail of blood leading investigators to a bedroom where blinds had been shredded by shrapnel Everything was covered in blood They said they discovered explosive chemicals in a box of rusty nails that could be used as shrapnel PVC pipes six inch high grass at his home Showed no signs of having been freshly mowed. That's the key right there. This is where right there This is so six inch high grass at the home. This is your colombo moment Hmm. This is when you this is when you believe a second

It seems that there's been no lawnmow when they happen at this excuse me, ma'am Tell me just ask you one last thing and then immediately he's like I try to blow up their sweet little pussies But here's a video him on there's a picture of him on facebook holding up a bunch of 20 dollar bills Which he looks so badass. Now in a nearly shed authority at least 300 dollars of 20 dollar bills though, henry I mean, let's give some credit where credit is due and you know for a fact his parents are driving because he's in the back But he's definitely that's definitely his parents driving Yes, that is a van that he is in and a nearby shed authorities found a crumpled letter They discussed a suicide bomber walking through a shopping mall while concealing deadly objects to target a stage of hot cheerleaders

Now this comes from this is directly from the quote from his little writing I will not be afraid of the consequences read the letter No matter what I will be heroic I will make a statement like elliot rogers did he thought to himself And of course he spelled elliot rogers wrong, which really pisses me off because you know how he spelled it Like my boy erin rogers on the gp packers on the gb packers not the green packers That's an alien race the green bay packers. He spelled it like erin rogers You cannot defame the great rogers name like this get elliot out of there

But it seems that he at least lost His fucking girlfriend in this which is really a shame and again, isn't the whole this is why we actually have a Insell is a very interesting term right now. That's what I would say If he has a girlfriend, then isn't he not an insell? No, I mean his fucking hand I mean his fucking hand that he blew off his fucking body You blew off his masturbating hand. Well, we don't know which hand was blown off or if he's right or left-handed So that's just speculation mr. Hey Daniel Day Lewis learned how to paint with his feet and that was just for a guy named movie. You can learn how to jerk off with anything

Well, oh my god. Well either way This is according to his brother Neil Carini. He says my family is trusting in God and godly people Please pray for my brother. Thank you It is I honestly You could pray for him. I guess he could deserve it. It would ever that I mean it doesn't do anything So yes pray for him. This might be the exact wake-up call this boy needed He obviously has

Extreme mental issues. He's got to work through. He's got anger problems. He's got a lot of stuff going on Blowing his hand off might be it literally might be the thing that saves his life It probably will be. Where he gets this thing cold off and maybe he could sit and Realize that he's a little bitch and that he was super mad about all of this bullshit It's like he doesn't even look that fucking bad. He needs to get his shit together He needs to learn how to play a fucking hop. He needs to learn how to play a fucking instrument He needs to get a fucking job. He needs to pull his shit together Or maybe because who knows?

There's plenty of work at the amazon factory with people with one hand Oh my god, and you could imagine all the games you can play when you're just like, oh Help me in the shredder, you know, and then you get him like a bunch of catch-up and I'm coming out of your hand Got you guys That's classy You could be the funny guy in the room if you want to You could be and if he has any athletic prowess whatsoever looking at him

I don't think he's gonna make it in the NFL But don't forget Jason Pierre Paul blew off his hand We'll play him with fireworks not intended to hurt anyone, but he's still in the NFL And there's another person as well with with with one hand no no fault of his own and whatsoever He's playing in the NFL. So if he does want to be an athlete, he could still be a he could still be a chuck What do they call those people again? Dave's dance a Chad's? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, or the guy from the the drummer from Def Leppard Yeah, look at that guy

I actually, does it would he also lose one of his feet? I think the drummer I think they might have lost both I think a foot Yeah, I think it was just you know when you get a new toy and now they have all the detachable wrists and limbs and stuff But then you know, you're just gonna end up like losing everything. He's in toy like Age five years old like it's all done like when the kid swallowed one of his arms his foot's gone Like he's never gonna be put together again. He's doing very well. I think he might actually be he's still alive Has anyone ever kept all of the parts to a mr. Potato head for example

It's not possible over the years That all life should work. They were all just gonna slip. That's just us Kessel. It's because we're gonna get fucking diabetes That's why that's how that's called losing a section He did not deserve to lose sections of his body at a time We will do the things that it takes to deserve Slowly shedding body parts as time goes I'm just a quick just quick side note here in indiana. There was a missionary Uh, his name is donald c. Miller. If you want to know what the most haunted place in the world is it's probably this place

fbi toured or searched his museum and they found over two thousand human bones That he had taken from ancient native american burial sites. So not a good idea if you see no Bones from a nature from an old Native american burial site Don't take him let him stay because this yeah He must just sit in his house and just hear like Like all the fucking native american songs and whistles go through the house as the spiritual slides around and I guess you just get used to it

Like the subway absolutely. Yeah, I don't even hear the the Cranking of the subway on the tracks as they haven't lubed them up in a decade. I don't see the rats anymore Eating full full hot dogs or someone's ear I do want to point this out in this story. Amy Moore. That's one of miller's friends again this missionary She said I mean this man. He's an amazing piece of history He's an artifact himself because he's 91 years old and he has just recently died So she kind of roasted him a little bit anyway a little bit rose So anyway, we've been talking a lot about

um burial robberies robberies and they are still going on today So be careful out there and if you do have a burial site and you want to protect those bones You got to get a chihuahua got to get a chihuahua because they they are surprisingly little vicious creatures I've seen wendy turn into her animal self like normally wendy acts like a cat or like a door stop Or like just like a human just like she just cuddles. She's a little fucking warm like heating lamp That's all wendy is but when she gets crazy she like puffs up to two times her size It's weird looking. It's crazy. This other story. It just quickly talking about me. This is wild I want to go into deeper like I'm deeper deeper. God damn it. I want to go into

I want to look into this more. This is the decade old quest This is from the this from wapow the decade old quest for a hidden treasure chest is over the millionaire who hid it Says it was just found. This is fucking wild Yes, a new mexico art and antiques collector announced 10 years ago that he had hit a chest containing Two million dollars and riches deep in the rocky mountains He told people to go hunt for it and hundreds and thousands of adventurers did just that At least five people died while looking for this This is great. So, okay. I have a question for you

You say you hide you hide a treasure And you're like if anyone finds that they can keep it five people die searching for it At what point do you just be like, I know where it is I'm just gonna take a bag like and how many people have to die in search of your hidden treasure before At some point you're complicit in their death I think you just become more and more powerful each time someone dies looking for your hidden treasure Because you're becoming like an old school like pharaoh. This is the this is weird This is story from lore the idea of like just standing out being like find my treasure and see

Oh, what's adventure about? It's like it's incredible. These people signed up for the adventure. I guess so. I mean It is curly's gold. They are out there. They're looking for it. I'm sure billy crystal I'm sure everyone out there was telling some really great jokes I just feel like if I hid treasure and five people died looking for it I would say I would I would make a better map. That's all I would just be like Here's a better map just so no one has to die. It was supposed to be difficult I think it'd be different if he was like in a sniper nest above the treasure Just fucking shooting whoever got close. That's hot. That's the game. I would play the man's name is forest fen

He hid a 42 pound bronze chest and it was finally unearthed over the weekend The search is over fen 89 wrote on his website. The treasure has been found the finder of the treasure wanted to remain anonymous because he was one of an estimated three 350,000 people Who over the last decade have risked their lives in search of the buried bounty? This thing is crazy I also want to my one thing is that I want to find out all the various places. He stole Things that were inside of this chest. I want to see how other people feel like what who who says who does this shit belong to It was an elusive 13th century treasure chest filled with rare artifacts precious jewels Gold rubies diamonds other valuables. He said that he had it over the years and he just put it in a fucking box

He said fen said that the treasure was found Saturday and the man who uncovered the chest sent him a photograph as evidence of the discovery Damn, all right I wonder how new technology has played a role in this as well if you're a treasure hunter reach out side stories lpotl at gmail.com I didn't even think that people did this anymore other than israel keys who would hide his treasures Which were a gun and a knife and other disgusting nerdy things that he would keep around The trees of the neighborhoods that he would go torment Um, I did not realize that treasure hunting was still such a thing 350,000 people only five died now. I reversed my statement. That's not so bad

That's what I'm saying. And I also in my mind. We have billionaires coming out of the woodwork to fucking deeply embarrass themselves Talking about social issues that they are completely spaced away from humankind Into knowing too much to even speak about this is the type of shit that billionaires should be doing I agree if they are going to exist and I don't even think that they should exist But if they are going to exist, this is the fun shit He wrote an autobiography called the thrill of the chase where he put clues in a 24 line poem And he said that the purpose of the hunt was encourage people to immerse themselves in the wilderness and engage in an old fashion adventure This is the I get this. This is I thought many people thought it was a hoax

I mean now that you say that he wrote a book you get people reading you get people outdoors Everyone, you know, there's a lot of masculine people out there who are treasure hunters who are forced to read a poem That's very good for them You actually were truth You actually were close to the truth the police chief this comes from ABC news a police chief Actually pleaded with the author who hid treasure to call off the hunt After two people died in 2017 He left three more died

He left three more died. He's like, please stop it. Please. Please stop this treasure hunt. And he's like, no, I refuse It is it is about the adventure. It is about the thrill of the chase What's a treasure to a detective though, Henry? A corpse a corpse a corpse as they wish they wish it was a corpse And this is where he said this is one of the beginning of the of the poem Okay, begin it where warm waters hold and take it in a canyon down Not far but too far to walk put in below the home of brow I think it's underneath the toilet. It sounds like it's in an outhouse. Yeah

Yeah, they'll have a brown the hole of brown. Yes indeed. It's been near my butthole this entire time No one's seen it for 10 years What if it was just underneath a fucking porter potty at the thunderedome? Like it's just underneath it is just in the piss trough of a hockey stadium Oh my goodness that would be a rough day to be a treasure hunter unless you're into both of those things But this dude force Venice like one of those like he has one of those dens filled with treasures antique And all sorts of like weird little bottles and piles of gold looking things and shit these people are really

I mean Technically he probably did horrible shit to make this money not always sometimes you just play the market and it goes crazy Um one billionaire and the billionaire has to do this and you get exactly two billion dollars So you can give one billion away. That's the idea. That's it That's all we need in this one in my mind. I feel like you should get give a fucking billion away Who gives a shit a billion dollars is going to like what is that even that's not even money at that point? It's like, what's the point? I know it's about the pursuit of it, but it's fucking absolutely ridiculous. It's it's fake Money is fake. Well that tell tell that to my health insurance

Yeah, I know all right and just the final story here that we have Henry mentioned diabetes And this dude in belgium in belgium Um, man, if he doesn't get it, I don't think any of us will this prank is one of the craziest things ever It's also been happening for 10 years. He's a 65 year old bad belgium dude Apparently people keep on ordering delivery pizzas to his house They keep on ordering pizzas to his home and he doesn't know who it is He doesn't order the pizza. He doesn't want the pizza and he doesn't know how to stop it This is a girl. It has been happening for

10 years. This is a long con. It's obviously his sadistic neighbor It seems like it might be like the chick from serial mom just knowing that this is working driving them nuts This is what gene von Landung him had to say he said I cannot sleep anymore I start shaking every time I hear a scooter on the street He goes on to say I dread that someone will come to drop off hot pizzas yet another time But his buddy is also getting the pizzas And they have no fucking clue where they're coming from and they keep showing up and it's traumatizing this dutch person belgium

It is traumatizing him. He doesn't understand but it's like I guess you do have to pay for each one Right like you have to pay for every single time they show up Or how many pizza places are there number one? Don't all of them know that this man never orders pizza at this address They have to it has to be a pizza magnet It has to be the herman kane the herman kane of belgium has got to be behind this We already know the one kissle. We know who it is. Oh my god, don't even say. No, it's the fucking papa man You think this is papa?

I don't know what the papa's doing because papa's shorty. I mean, I there's how many times since the beginning of covid 19 Have we received the meme of papa john? Being the cause of all of this chaos and for a while I was like this is fucking hack I don't think that this is true. I don't think that he was a part of this or had anything to do with this I don't think he was as far reaching as he thought he did but I honestly think something like this is more of him just practicing I could see that this is papa john a little bit out of touch. I think I think touring giving us a virtual tiktok tour of his billionaire mansion all of the Papa john's garlic sauce bought him all of that

Again, just go look at his tiktok and see the shit that fucking built that he built out of the fucking just Poisoning us literally just making us have cancer He has that fucking huge spinning statue. It's amazing in the front of his home No, I it's inspiring. It's something to a point something it is yes, it's it's inspiring to a point Although in my mind you get that when you cure cancer or when you're like I love to see that The sad thing is Henry. It's never the renowned historian like when you think about it, you're always like oh The historian must be in his mansion in his beautiful library Study no they they live in cobble hill in a really tiny apartment that they got grandfathered in so they could stay there

Yes, that's what happens to a historian They are never paid and they should know that from studying history That it never pays that you have to find a way to get in there I'm the main way to the main way to make money as a historian. I believe Is showing your asshole on the only fans Which is I need to do it. I would never want to see a historian's butthole. It's used too much. It's sad on all the time But it's nice and spread. It's the people's asshole. It is uh Van Lendingham He's calls this pizza terror

And he also has said that uh other fast food including kebabs Have arrived as well. Jesus fucking christ. When is this shit gonna end? When's it gonna end? When is this shit gonna end? I think we should send and I mean this I think we should send our troops To belgium sure and rectify this. I think this is a good use of terminal force. You remember seal team six I do how many of them were mysteriously murdered after the death of samanlon the quote of death of a samanlon Samanlon and jeffrey eppstein in the same grave right now, right? Uh, well, I'm not sure about all of that. I just I'm ready to go today I've had a lot of spring. You know what gets me there spring hill jack coffee

I just want to say again, thank you to the people at spring hill jack coffee for just keeping me just on edge enough To make my family tiptoe around me But me ready for the radio and also able to hear the tiptoes you got to be super aware You got to know when they're scared and you can still then be annoyed by them Even for them That's how big and light and powerful my my tiptoes can be so just lastly the belgium police They are aware of the situation. They have not charged anyone and they don't worry. They're on it They don't worry. Yeah, they're on it. They're gonna fuck it because they eat waffles for lunch there

Yes, they do and breakfast and dinner and law enforcement. They do believe that it's someone that they both know And they hope to one day unveil them van lengtegem says it will not be their best day Whoever this is he has ended this Oh, I think uh, it's the opposite I think it will exactly because I know that if I was doing this and honestly, I want to steal this I think that this is one of the funnest things in the world to do to somebody to slowly but surely psychologically torture them I would hold it to my chest Until to my death bed and at the very end and hopefully it's somebody who I'm really close to I'm looking at you kiss

I'll wait till we're neighbors And then like really really close to and then eventually be like, you know the pepperoni wave you got in 2030 It was me And it's been me all along. Oh my got you fucker. I got you Got you fucker. Yeah, your last words will just be got you fucker. I know that already and uh I will and my last action as a free man will be suffocating you in that very bed That were you out of those words and then I will go and I will be incarcerated

All right. I think it's time for hero of the week All right, we're actually gonna do another doubler because why not and the point of this doubler is It's just called fun breaking and entering. Okay, so it's a new type of Breaking and entering. I don't mind breaking and entering if it makes a point It's harmless if it's harmless it is for sometimes it is and sometimes it can be scary. Yes, absolutely So in San Diego, California, this dude broke into a bank, but he didn't want no money. He's like, I'm good He's homeless, but he's still said I don't care about the money Instead the guy broke into the uh broke into the bank so he could use the branches microwave

Which I think it's nice. This man must have scouted this bank. I don't know How does he break into a bank? You know, that's a question for another day. It was the San Diego Wells Fargo So, you know, whoever works there at at security is getting hammered for some reason just because they got far going the name And that's all people do out there. So why did he do this? Well, it's because he needed to heat up hot pockets Because he had a package of two hot pockets one package has two in there. Don't think they're screwing you over And he wanted to eat those scrumptious delights a reporter asked him on the scene

Uh, was it worth it a reporter asked and what he said what he said back was was it worth it? Yeah, it was worth it He said a hot pocket. Hell. Yeah. So there you go The man hero one of the heroes of the week the man stabilized the bank one hot pocket at a time Absolutely. He ate both of the microwavable turnovers. Well inside the bank. That's exactly what you got to be doing there I would say steal a couple of tens if you can Um, but and the other hero of the week is a man who got hammered and broke into the capron park zoo He had gotten drunk and wanted to see the monkeys. His name is joseph villa 52 years old lives in adelboro God hammered walked by the zoo. It was like shit, man. There's a monkey's got a muckus

You know, I'll tell you what we were off like a climb up there because I did what I heard Our little bird told me that used to be a monkey and you know, this man was hammered because Um, because the arrest happened at 8 43 in the morning. So he is on at least hour Waited an hour 15 minutes. He could have just went to the zoo I mean, it's very fun. Uh, the the enforcement said no, we waited an hour He literally just wait if he got to 8 30. This is the one thing as a buddy. No, no The zoo is closed because of corona virus

Why animals can't get it I guess they can give it. I have no idea or us. Yeah, but we're not fucking Oh, man, I don't know what the rules are for a zoo. I say open them No animals were affected or harmed during this bizarre incident. So therefore I say Leave them alone part of the zoo's fence was broken and officers believe Villa damaged the fence around 7 30 p.m Monday on surveillance footage police saw a man who was later identified

Uh, as villa walking around the zoo. He allegedly climbed into a rowboat and pedaled out to a large pond Where there were where there are two lemur islands lemurs are a beautiful primate, of course and um Villa's visit with the lemurs wasn't meant to be however He wasn't able to reach the island because he lodged the boat underneath a footbridge Even had to exit the boat and swim through the lemur pond back to dork at which point he exited to the zoo In the same way. So the lemurs are just left out at the zoo

On the wrong island, I guess But I mean like they just stay in the zoo. They don't like take them and put them in a facility or something Like they literally just still they are just at the zoo Uh, if you see it, if you get a chance to see this man, he looks like already laying Five years ago. So he'll probably lose. He'll probably get a squishy nose at some point But he he this is definitely not this man's first rodeo Let me see. I'm trying to find this man breaks in the zoo joseph villa I'm just gonna see the look of this than this man's face. I love it. Oh, yeah, man. Wow

He looks like a fucking dick tracy villain. He is not gonna do well later on in his life But no, this is the difference. You know what? Okay My only thing about my pushback is is if he was like a young guy I'd be kind of like into it, but there's something about this big alcoholic Scary, he looks like one of my dad's scary friends Yeah, like he looks like a guy the one that's not allowed over or if he is allowed over It's a backyard barbecue and you can't come in the house. He can't come in the house But yes, he looks like one of those guys been like this guy's scary

Other question is maybe not either of those people are really heroes, but the idea of The idea of living the life breaking in breaking your barriers. Wow Good good move. Good pivot. It's about that. Do you think that would be kind of fun? For them to take the animals out of the zoo on little COVID-19 tours Where you take the animals and like kind of like old school like the way the circus used to come through Where you put him in like kind of like little like Mobile kind of carts, right where you can drive them through your neighborhood

And then everybody can come out of their house and take a look at the animals That's what the guy did when he kidnapped all the kids and batman returns. That is the penguins plan Yeah, that's what that weird ass does. But you know, it would work It it'll definitely get attention. But what if it was nice? I think that sounds great. I love that. We could say that about damn near everything Damn near fucking everything and I'm gonna get mine. I was just gonna just we'll just ruin everything I'm going to go into some listener letters number one as I got some because this is a little bit later on But we talked about the uh the black hat man

For a period of time and there was a couple interesting responses. We got from a couple of psychologists One why I thought that was very very interesting was Number one is that the the liminal state between wakefulness and sleep is actually very stressful Because our brains are kind of caught in this fight or flight response because our body because our awareness is up But our bodies can't move but one thing that's interesting is kind of little depictions of the hat man's face and body and why they lack clear faces our brains This comes from a letter our brains actually suck at creating faces

Many of the hallucinations that occur not only with sleep paralysis, but are common with schizophrenia and other mental illness They lack clear faces. They're often obscured lack detail or brains fuck up features in some way The hat man's face described as either obscured completely or with exaggerated features fits well into what psychologists expect in humanoid hallucinations The features that do appear Sunk in eyes and large open mouth fit the description of a starving predator or could be an evolution Or could be an evolutionary template for quote-unquote scary face locked away in our reptilian brains The other one they say it's like what they call a visual release hallucination hallucination or charles bonnet syndrome

Which was thought to be rare but is out considered under reported and probably relatively common It's a very interesting idea that these release hallucinations can occur in people without formal syndrome But who are sleep deprived have visual problems or just in the dark and just like normal people They said there was something very interesting, right? There are a variety of different kinds of bizarre hallucinations that are seen with this syndrome But commonly but commonly they tend to appear tall Stretched out the brain is thought to compensate for this by adding a top hat to make sense of the bizarrely tall Then person and I thought that was very interesting very interesting indeed. Thank you so much for sharing that that the

Black hat man has certainly given us a lot of mileage. It's a fascinating thing And you're right, man the the hollowed out eyes the big gip and mouth the black hole that it that it Leaves it's scary as hell Oh, and we got some but we got some responses back about semen x, right? They were talking about the pills that can make your cum bigger. Yeah, that's a relaxed fit episode does it work But they say apparently it is a it is a dietary supplement this comes from a wonderful listener Um, they apparently it is a lot of times. There's a dietary supplement

It's a consists of zinc magnesium and calcium There's a few academic studies out there regarding the combo and it's an effect and its effect of semen production and ejaculation The reason I'm aware of this phenomenon is thanks to a hunky bodybuilder I used to sleep with he and his lifter bros all took ZMC as a part of their vitamin regimen for working out and building muscle But all noticed that once they started taking it they were shooting off huge loads Whoa, this is his words as she said that would on occasion rock it across the route Apparently it also gave them really vivid lucid dreams

Well, it might not be the safest thing you could ever digest, but all right I mean, I guess that uh, that's one way to sell it. I do like the pornhub is like fuck muscle. We'll give you cum I just don't again. We said this last time. I don't need more cum I don't think anyone does I don't we mean some people do some people like the aesthetic This is a weird one when I was in ninth grade walking to the bus stop It was still dark out and the early calm no traffic and very quiet But the second I stepped onto the street from my driveway It felt like there was some kind of mild static electricity in the air

Anyways, my bus stop was half a block from my house on the corner Both one streetlight above it and some pine trees and shrubs that line the street I was looking to the ground as I walk up the hill towards the bus stop and just before I crossed the street I finally looked up to see if the kid if the kid I shared this bus stop with was already there and he wasn't instead Standing directly under the streetlight was this 3.3 and a half foot tall alien

Facing its body toward me staring at me I stopped on my tracks and stared for a second paralyzed with fear This thing was like three and a half feet tall with grayish bluish whitish skin I could see blue veins under its skin which seemed almost translucent or thin no clothing No hair no noticeable gentilia Its head was large to the sort of flat-ish top that became bulbous around the forehead area Tapered in a bit at the temple then bulbous cheekbones and the tapered down to a flat-ish chin and the eyes were larger and more spaced out than human eyes I didn't see a nose and the mouth was like a small slit no lips and closed

The arms were too long for its body and hung at its side. I guess I didn't take note of its hands It kind of had a flat chest with small pector muscles with no nipples Oh, and a wider protruding lower stomach. This is very interesting Widest hips whitish wide-set hips short legs look more like how when a hooved animal stands in their hind lengths than with humanoid feet The thing just stood there under the streetlight facing me and staring at me and only 20 to 30 feet away from me I guess I stood there for maybe three to five seconds staring at it frozen with fear and confusion trying to figure out What the fuck I was staring at when my brain caught up with me. I ran as fast as I could back home And just inconsolably crying and hyperventilating my parents were confused and horrified to what happened to me for the three minutes

I was gone. My mom had to help me walk to the nearest chair I didn't go to school my dad stayed home because I was too scared to be alone And I fucking after I calmed down I took a nap and woke up eight hours later to my mom when she got back from work Very very interesting. I love those kinds of things and here's one more of those stories. I just love this fucking shit So was the alien going to school? Don't be fucking ridiculous. I don't know anything. You dare be ridiculous. All right. Well, thank you so much for sending in those listener emails We got one more for you. Now. This is strange. This is one of those. I don't know Like this is kind of a chicken or the egg thing like tell tell me what you think

Okay, my mother was is convinced that I've been an abductee since early childhood I frequently had horrific night terrors in which I would scream about bugs attacking my body Several times the night terrors got so bad that she took me to the ER as a toddler where I was given heavy sedatives and sent home She also said I regularly told her about the very tall man who would watch me from my doorway Toddler me described him as having insect-like eyes and being so tall He had to hunch to fit in the doorframe Frankly, my mother is a very new agey and I didn't believe these stories recounted to me in middle school I did vaguely recall a creepy tall man, but the night terrors themselves stopped when I turned four

This was until I had an experience as a teenager that leaves me without any rational answers to this day I was 13 years old reading from my bedroom It was midday as I remember the sun shining down on me as I lay reclined in bed I remember feeling foggy all of a sudden like in a daydream for some unknown reason some unknown period of time What brought me back to full consciousness was looking down on my legs and realizing they were covered in blood It wasn't just my legs blood was streaming down my arms and my chest. I was but I was not in any pain I ran downstairs hysterical and I got my mother She began frantically wiping at the blood to try and figure out where the wound was

But by this point the blood had covered most of my body and we couldn't find a source My mother rushed me into the shower to get better handle of the situation It was there that we discovered that I was covered head to toe head to toe in hundreds of needle pricks My body looked like someone had taken a sewing needle and stitched through all my limbs and core I'm 33 now and I have exhausted my brain trying to find any rational explanation rational explanation for this experience It also was burned to my mother's memory I would have thought it was a hallucination To her it was a final proof of what she had always expected since my childhood and yet and I have yet to come up with a better theory

Damn All right. Thank you so much. Who knows who fucking knows. All right everyone Thank you so much for listening to this episode of side stories. Keep the emails coming side stories LP otl at gmail.com Hope everyone is doing all right out there Another week ahead of us here on the last podcast network Apocalypse radio coming at you from a bunker deep not that deep inside of los angeles is actually it's it is above ground Yeah, we're all elevated. Yeah. Yeah, we really are just remember you gotta love your life Yeah, you spend most your fucking most your weekend watching videos of police abuse

People beating the shit out of each other, but you gotta love your fellow man That's why it's more important than ever to love your fellow man. Give him some support. Absolutely. You gotta live Every day as if the shit was about to go down Are you the person that you need to be for the post apocalyptic world? Learn how to hold your breath. That's the only thing I could say right? Sure. You learn how to swim learn how to snorkel It's not that easy learn how to snorkel and it helps on vacation and it helps Fighting the government and you're gonna want to laugh every once in a goddamn while Because when it comes down to it revolution

It's not going to be without some form of tatters and tatters here and there So we got to get out there and we have to laugh as the statues fall Absolutely live laugh love folks and of course if you if you are in austin laugh when you drive past the alex jones studio I just watched somebody try to infiltrate it and it was really amazing. Oh my god, not easy to do not easy to do No, I bet you has a lot of security Yes, he does. All right, everyone. Thank you so much for listening. Hail yourselves. Hail satan maghustalations Help me This show is made possible by listeners like you

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