LATE BLOOMERS - DIRTY LAUNDRY: Shame-free hygiene, ADHD hacks, and our grossest confessions

Episode Date: September 17, 2025

In this week’s episode of LATE BLOOMERS, Rich and Rox air out the DIRTY LAUNDRY — literally. From BO and bed sheets to flannel roulette and maggot towels (yes, really), we talk about the messy realities of hygiene and cleaning when you have ADHD. We share our most embarrassing confessions, break down why cleanliness has no moral value, and give you the hacks that actually work — from five-minute cleans to dopamine baths to inviting someone over just to get the house sorted. This is the shame-free conversation we all need: raw, funny, and practical. If you’ve ever struggled to keep on top of laundry, showers, or cleaning routines, this episode will make you feel seen — and maybe even give you a system that sticks.

Today we are talking dirty laundry, cleaning yourself, cleaning your house, and maybe a little bit of shame reduction. You're doing a podcast episode about cleaning. Fair enough. This is late bloomers. Where we are getting our lives together. Eventually. Eventually. Listen, cleaning is a big area of secret shame for loads of people. And especially in neurodivergent households, whether it's personal hygiene or household cleaning, loads of people are feeling terrible about.

about it. So let's talk about it. So I was, I just wanted to make sure you're not professing to be like, is it Marie Kondo or whatever name? I don't think anyone is going to think I'm a cleaning expert, are they? No. So just in case, disclaimer, we are not, you a bit more than me, but I'm not a cleaning expert. I'm a cleaning non-expert. I can hold my own. You can. Right. So should we start? Yeah. Let's start with a confession time. Just to break the eye. Lovely. Make anyone watching stroke listening feel better about themselves. Go on. So what's your grossest cleaning and hygiene fail?

I have got so many. So I'm going to go with cleaning first. Yeah. So it would be having a fly infestation when I was 20 in my second year at uni. wait so I obviously know this story but please share because I would really love to know how that happens

so it was my second year of uni yes so I was moving into a flat for the first time not a halls of residence like a house living with a few mates or boys I was kind of there was a few single rooms and then one double room

and I was given the double room because I was the girl Yeah. I think they would be in chivalrous. I had grand plans for this room. I wanted to paint it purple, mirrors on the wall, fairy-lit canopay. I bought all the gear. Yeah. And then just left it on the floor.

In fact, I kicked over a pot of paint on a drunken night out and spilled purple paint all over the carpet. But where were the flies? Oh, right. So I never unpacked my suitcase. Right. So I just kind of lived out of a suitcase. and then I'd throw wet towels on the suitcase

and then I must have just left them there for months because one time someone came in my room and moved the towels and there was a fly infestation. You do know, I'm sure you do, but if you don't, this might be quite shocking, that they wouldn't, they would have been maggots first. Yeah. So there would have been maggots growing on your towel

left in the corner, turning into flying, trapped in the towel. I don't think I'd be able to slip. Like, wow, babe. No, it's so gross. But, like, at the time, I didn't know I had ADHD. I'm living away from home for the first time.

I had some family stuff going on. My mum was ill with cancer. I just was like, oh, I guess I'm just really messy. You just deal with it. You just brave it, wear it like a badge of honour. Like I can see now it's just, but how did you dry yourself when you, because presumably these towels would have been here a long time to grow maggots and then for the maggots to go through whatever process they're going through to turn into flies.

How did you cope in the meantime? So I'd buy new towels. And just add to the pile. Yeah, or like I'd borrow people's towels. Sometimes I'd just run through with a sheet. Like I was quite industrious with finding towels. And let's be honest, I wasn't showering. Yeah.

Like that regularly. I don't remember being in that bathroom, like, very often if I'm, if I'm being truthful. Anyway, let's take the spotlight off me. What's your biggest house cleaning fail, like most gross thing? I don't think I've, I don't, honestly, I'm not just saying it. I don't think I've got a house cleaning fail. Oh my God. Like what I can say from hygiene perspective, I stink right now.

like it's growth you know you know sometimes you can handle the smell of your own bad smells like whether it be farts or b o or whatever i can barely bring myself to sniff my pits at the moment like it it feels like someone else's smell that's how bad it is that is the perfect way to be for this episode yeah you come as you are babe and i'm glad you're sitting a meter and a half away from me and no one can smell you for a video or audio so the audience is fine but you really in your entire life there's not one time your house has ever got really messy or no i've just tired no i've tidied it up like it might have had messy period but i've just tidied there's nothing that warrants me talking about it on a podcast but you know me i'm

mentally unwell if things are untidy so i choose to get with someone with ADHD genius You know what I mean? Listen, you're setting challenges, you're overcoming and that's how you build self-esteem, apparently. Okay, all right, what about, so personal hygiene? I stink. Right now.

Yeah. Any other hair brushing, teeth cleaning, showering, like anything else that's gross in your life? No. Look, I love you, right? So I'm saying this in jest, but before I met you, I showered every day,

I clean my teeth twice a day, like without fail. Like, I needed to shower to have enough energy. to get in the car to drive to work. Now, I don't. So you're blaming your worst cleaning errors on me. It's not your fault. I feel more comfortable.

Like, I'm sitting here. I love the fact that I can, I smell so bad. Like, it gives me something to talk about, don't it? There you go. There you go. But I have rubbed off on you. My feel. Literally, yeah.

Okay, so my personal hygiene fail. I've got so many. I almost feel it's like, a bit unfair to talk about, but let's just pick one. What do you think I'd go for with personal hygiene? Would it be like trampons or something or not? Rolling my own tampons because I keep forgetting tampons. No, because they're quite clean if you roll them well.

I don't know. And I'm quite adapted. I don't know about that. Rolling them well. I mean, I've had mats in my hair and I've had to have my hair cut off because I haven't washed or brushed my hair when I was younger. I'm so sorry. I do want you to carry on

but can I just ask a question that's been on my mind since our first TikTok video about a trampon? Yes. So without going to graphic you're rolling your own tampon with toilet roll

with toilet paper, putting it inside of you does that not like disintegrate because that feels quite unhygienic. What do you mean no? If you run a toilet roll under the tap it goes just like slop. Well, it's obviously not a tap up there, is it, babe?

So it happens, I don't do it all the time. That happens when you've forgotten that it's time of the month and you're caught short out and about. So you're out and about and you think, oh no. Yeah, I understand that. The red river is flowing. So you find a toilet, toilet paper. You sort of, you roll it almost as a sort of technique.

Right. And you're trying to keep it as sort of. tight as possible, so you can get as much in there. So you sort of roll it like this. Then you will fold it in half to make a sort of entrance point. Right. That is utilised. And then you wouldn't leave it for a really long time.

It's only for like a short stopgare. You get to the shop. But a couple of hours doesn't feel like a short, like I'm thinking, right, I've done this. I need to get to the shop now, like five minutes. no it can hold it's remarkable i mean i've had it overnight before it's remarkably resilient if you get the fold right and would it sorry last question and thanks for for sharing with me but would it not be better to just pad in in your pants just loads there so i have done that too right but obviously that can move around it doesn't feel as secure there's always going to be a bit

of anxiety, whereas if you're actually plugging the old gap. Right. Okay, fine. This is meant to be shame reduction, and I feel it's just like me, shaming myself. I'm not saying anything bad, am I? I think it's fascinating. Like, I have learned that toilet roll is more resilient up there than I thought it would be. There you go, learn new thing every day.

Yeah, also, mats in hair, not cleaning teeth for ages, and then having, have fillings. Just being a stinky pie in general. Yeah, that's me. Right. I can't believe you didn't have anything for that. Number two. Okay, listen. We're going to talk about some statistics that nobody wants to hear.

Okay. And we're going to see how we match up, yeah? Yeah. So how often do you think the average person changes their bed sheets? Once every two months. Now, it's actually every 24 days. Now, I got this from Google, and these are actually statistics from America. So this is in the US, bear that in mind.

They're changing their sheets on average every 24 days. So what's that in weeks? Three weeks and three days. But an expert says that you should apparently change it every week. Whatever. Because bacteria builds up. So how often do you change your bed sheets? Oh, my God.

Three, four months? I think we... When I can be bothered? We found your thing. Okay, so this is the answer to question one. When my trampone fails. Yeah. Usually when there's blue haired eye or some stain, yeah.

That's mental though, isn't it? Every 24... The thing is, though, having clean sheets is so lovely. Notice you didn't... You asked me how often I change. my sheets. We sleep in the same bed. How often do you change them, Bubby? I don't often change the sheets, but I am very good at buying new sheets from Home Sense. And you love new sheets. Oh my God. Yeah. Like I am both the dirtiest person you could ever imagine who also loves cleanliness

in the extreme. So it's like quite unfortunate mixing of things there. The thing about changing the sheets though, and I'm not like, I'm not, I'm not being mean, but what happens to me with I've got to change the sheets, that means I've got to wash the sheets that come off. There's already loads of washing, the wear again shelf maybe has just been gone through. So I've got a full thing of washing and it's added an extra load of washing and drying. So it's like I can't deal with that. Whereas you, it's probably fair to say you look at this is going to be lovely getting into this new bed and then the sheet fairy takes the dirty sheets away and they arrive back at some point so that's why i don't change the

sheets because i don't want to add to your workload so actually it's just care okay you're ready for statistic number two yeah go on and this is again america in a fraction as expressed in a fraction how many people shower or bath every day? Four out of five. Wow, two thirds. So I went 80% it's 66%. Oh, you weren't close. For some reason, I thought you were saying close.

See, that's mind-blowing. 66% of people shower or bath every single day. Wait, you think that's mind-blown because it's a lot? Yeah. See, I think it's mind-blown because I don't feel like it is a lot Because I used to do it every day I know that I don't now So I would be one of the minority

But I don't think that's a lot I guess we're coming at it from different Angles perspective, one feral animal And one used to be quite well-adapted individual Until you met me Now stink How long was it since your last shower? Why are you so stinky today?

three days ago. Okay. But it's been really hot. Yeah. Really hot. Yeah. And what makes you decide now to have a shower? Because obviously historically it was, you would always have a shower before work,

but you work from home now. So there isn't that trigger. Yeah. Do you know what? That's the problem. That's why I'm not. Because it's not, if I'm going out, which I never do, I'll probably have a shower. Or I get to a stage where the stench is like it is today.

I'm like, I need to wash. those pits. So that's your alarm though when you smell your pits. Yeah, which is probably the same as you, right? Yeah, I'll wait for the body to give me the alarm and then I'll go and jump in the bath. You sometimes, though, don't opt the bath. You can sometimes do the quick wash, can't you?

And I'd never done that before. Oh, the super quick shower. No, the flannel's under the armpits, the soap and the... Oh. Not even flannel, just fingernails on the soap under the pits. and then you're good to go. Yeah. You do all the sort of important areas with a flannel.

I love that. But don't try not to put the flannel back because then if someone uses it on their face and it's been on your armpits and your bum and stuff. What would actually happen? Well, you'd smell it. Weird do you, though. Why, so the flannel would smell of, really?

I think if you had really B-O-E pits and you've gone in like that and you've hung it back, and someone's come in and wash their face. Oh, no, that even makes me go a bit icky. What do you do with a flannel, saying, just put me in the wash? Well, I'm saying, I'm advising others to not put them back. I play roulette.

Flannel roulette. So is this a flannel I've used on a quick, B-O-wash and bum-wash, or is it a clean face flannel? No. I know. Okay. No, wait, I've got one more. I can't believe this is, this is where this is going.

What percentage of people do you think clean their teeth every day? Oh, this is, this has got to be high. 95%. 70%. Shut up. Listen, this is just a quick Google. Who knows? Who knows?

And also, right, with these stats, who's answering a cleanliness survey? Right, that's my question. you've got to dig beneath the statistics. Who's gone and answered a cleanliness survey? I think clean people, right? So I think these stats are swayed. You think all these clean people roaming around like, I wish I could find a cleanliness survey to fill in today.

Well, I've certainly never been asked to fill one in. So I think if you polled our audience, those three questions, we would get different results. I agree. That's all I'm saying, you have to have an analytic mindset and look beyond the basic stats who put them together where did they come from yeah

anyway so 70% people are cleaning their teeth every day where are you at with teeth? I used to again every day but like now if I've got a day at home or I'm editing or whatever then no I really do try though and actually I really do try

and do a good clean like I do flossing and you do you're amazing with flossing tongue scraper So the electric toothbrush. I'm like on and off. Yeah. I'm on and off.

I'll always clean my teeth if I'm going out. Yeah. Which is never. Very intravarded. So read into that what you will. I will try and clean my teeth once a day. But we don't do it every day. But there's like, we are not.

No, some days I'm in bed and I'm like, oh. Why would I get up? I haven't cleaned my teeth today. And then it's like, should I? Occasionally I will jump. out of bed and do it then. Yeah. One weird thing about teeth cleaning, I shared with my therapist that like I haven't been to the dentist

in years and are not that up on my teeth. And he's a like a psychoanalytic therapist. So they're renowned for being quite neutral in whatever you tell them. So it makes it a judgment-free zone and they don't really have opinions about anything because they want you to feel empowered to run your own life. but it was the first time that all the stories of woe and trauma I've told this dude, me saying that I hadn't been to the dentist in years and don't really clean my teeth. He was like, what?

I was like, is that bad? He goes, rocks, that is bad. It was the first time in over a year. He shared an opinion. That I've got an opinion. And that has made me think. Because actually me and you are both maybe letting the... We pay for dental cover.

We just don't do anything with it. Yeah, get it with work and then... I'll change the bed sheets. sort the dentist out. After this episode, I think that would be amazing. And for our listeners, is it time for you to go to the dentist? There you go. Or just clean your teeth.

Right, come on, we've got to move on. Number three, the great clean-off. Share your weirdest but effective hacks for cleaning and hygiene. Sure. So for hygiene, mine is to like, you'll hate this. spend money on lovely bath and beauty products. So I actually do bath pretty regularly. And I always have lovely bath salts, candles in there,

like body oils, moisturisers. I'm currently using my African net sponge. Like I make the bath a dopamine-filled experience. I'm always excited. Also, always listen to a podcast in the bath. So I've got a podcast going plus a new vanilla body wash, African Net Spunge. Like, it's a whole experience. I couldn't just jump in and out of the shower.

Yeah. So, yeah, just spend money, basically. What you're saying? I'll hate it. Like, I don't know about it. No. Like, I know by the packages that get delivered. You see the space NK boxes.

Okay, so what's your cleanliness? Like, sorry, personal hygiene hack. I don't have one but I'm not professing to be brilliant I'm just not I like I'm not I don't have a hack I don't yeah I would have been able to answer this like when I was a bank manager but like not now what was your hack as a bank manager it was just like you shower before leaving the house it's the first thing you do it wakes you up it gives you energy after a shower you clean your teeth like it was all done every day and now it's just not we need to try and start getting you back all right so then that's the cleaning hack what about your

house cleaning well again house cleaning is just like if it's untidy do it but i know that's not helpful so i've been a bit weird with this one so mine a big bugbear of mine is like i like the on sweet bathroom being nice so my hack was to buy the hard cased toothpaste to put on the sink. Do you know why? Because it's more aesthetic. It's got the minimalist. It's because you are a squeezer of toothpaste.

Sorry, a what? A squeezer. You squeeze from the top of the toothpaste tube. No wait, hear me out. I'm being attacked. You squeeze from the top, too much comes out, you smash it down. You leave a crust of toothpaste on the top, which is gross. which means you can't close the lid properly

and then when you try to get to get to the end of the toothpaste you have to like roll it up from the bottom iron it out so yeah we went on the we went on the hard plastic just because it was making so much mess never shared that with me I don't know if I like being referred to as a squeezer deny it though no it's I can't recall it like immediately

but if I was thinking about getting toothpaste I'd flick open the lid I'm not squeezing from the top I'm just wrapping it I'm just putting it in my hand and squeezing where my thumb lands which is a bit nearer the top or midway at least it's certainly not the bottom is it?

No it's not the bottom I have seen some I haven't seen them recently obviously this is why when you've rolled it up in like a weird little roll and I just throw those away because I'm like that

There's so much juice left in them No if you're rolling it What's wrong with rolling it? I don't know I love that. It's a good hack. So buy a hard-cased toothpaste if you live with a squeezer. Yeah. But I guess it can relate to anything. Like, it can relate to having a little hook for your flannels that you've learned wash your B-O with. But, like, having it also, it's just easy and accessible. Having a place. Having a place for things.

Okay, my cleaning a house hack is invite somebody over. Oh, that's good. If somebody is coming to this house Yeah I am cleaning the floor The sink the kitchen I'm lighting candles I'm putting a Roma Thet

No that is my one time Don't try and take that way What I'm sitting here thinking Is I wonder if I could get away I wouldn't be able to do it very often Of just lying to you Like if it needed doing And I wanted us both to do the cleaning

Just being like Babe someone's got Like how would you It would work once. Yeah, but would you be angry? That's what I'm trying to work out. It would work, but like, would you be angry? Oh, that's difficult. Because on one hand, I'd be so happy that I'd clean to such a high standard in the house was lovely. On the other, I'd be so fuming. Trust would have been broken. Yeah. And I don't know. I don't know whether we'd recover. And you'd

never, ever be able to do it again. So like, you have that once. I would. You'd forget. Not very often, but I could do it again, 100%. Maybe like once a year. Yeah. You could have once a year. There's got to be another way to try and get me to clean than that, but I've never found it in 40 years. So, absolutely lovely, jubbly. Right, we're going to tie it up, okay. Let's do it. And we're going to reframe Cleaning and personal hygiene. Okay. Ready? I'm ready.

Number one, so important, there's no moral value to personal hygiene or clean in your house. For ADHD is it's a reason we shame ourselves, hate ourselves, feel like bad people, feel disgusting. It just is or it isn't. You can do it, you can not do it. You might need help, you might not. It doesn't make you a bad person if you have. haven't cleaned your teeth today, or if you haven't changed the sheets in the 24 days

average. Yeah. And I just think that is so important because so many of us end up hating ourselves. I completely agree that there's no moral value. What I sometimes struggle with in my head is that that doesn't necessarily mean that it doesn't matter. I'm not saying it should matter to everyone, but it matters to me. No, no. So in our house, there's a moral value me as your partner to talk to you about it be cleaner, help with the kitchen to get in amongst it

because it's important to you but I'm more mean if you're away for a week and it gets a bit messy I don't need to turn inwards and go I'm the worst person alive I'm just not I'm a bit messy you would wait until I was getting

in the car from the airport and then you would blitz it that's all I need next thing better done than perfect like ADHD is we want to be perfect we want to spring clean every room and ourselves look quick shower quick wipe down just let it be yeah let's just get in get out like in five minutes blew my mind when

we were recording our dubby videos for our dubby app which is a body doubling app before cleaning we have these tidy timers and it was like five minutes cleaning for 300 seconds done a whole room and i'd done they weren't super messy but they were like not tidy i'd done a kitchen I'd done a bedroom in 300 seconds. It's crazy. Absolutely crazy. Celebrate the small wins. If you have cleaned your teeth today, wipe down a surface, had a bath, ordered an

African net spend. Squeeze from the bottom. Squeeze from the bottom. Like, let's celebrate it. And I think the final thing is that like ADHD is or neurodivergence have very often just decided to give up on cleaning. We feel like we failed. We'll never be clean.

We'll never reach that standard, so we sack it off. But we function so much better in a clean environment. And we're so happy. So it's just a reminder that you deserve to be clean. You might need a bit of help with that. And you also deserve loads of compassion. So I hope this is the episode that gets someone to go in, give a little tooth a clean. One tooth.

Do the rest of them if you're there. Do the rest of it. But also don't beat yourself up. It's all good. Do you only live once? Late bloomers talking about cleaning. I know. where we're sort of getting it together

but not really eventually because you stink and I haven't cleaned my teeth today. Hope you've enjoyed the episode. If you have, like, share, subscribe, follow and we will see you same time next week.