LATE BLOOMERS - OVERTHINKING OLYMPICS: Why your brain won't shut up (and what to do about it!)

Episode Date: September 24, 2025

In this week’s episode of LATE BLOOMERS, Rich and Rox host the first-ever OVERTHINKING OLYMPICS: complete with events like the 3 a.m. Marathon, Catastrophe Sprint, Analysis Paralysis Relay, Hindsight High Jump, and the Social Gymnastics Floor Routine. Together, they unpack why ADHD and anxious minds get stuck in these cycles — from perfectionism and decision fear to safety-seeking and control — and explore the heavy cost of competing: lost time, broken sleep, strained relationships, and missed joy. But it’s not all doom and gloom. Rich (the reigning champ of underthinking) shares practical ways to break free: reality checks, journaling, movement, tolerating uncertainty, and catching the emotion underneath the spiral. This is a funny, relatable, and surprisingly hopeful conversation for anyone whose brain won’t shut up.

Are you an overthinker? If there was an overthinking Olympics, would you be winning gold? This week, we are talking about why our brains won't shut up and what we can actually do about it. So it's basically like a sport for ADHD and anxious minds. If only at burnt canneries. This is the late bloomer's podcast where we are getting our lives together. Dun dun dun, eventually. Did you like my interest?

It's usually you that does it eventually. I know. We've switched. And I love it. So, overthinking. So, okay, Olympics, you've gone for the analogy. So presumably there's some events. So do you want to talk us through what sporting events that you have magically come up with?

I love how you know my brain so well that you know if it's called the overthinking Olympics. I will have come up with overthinking events. And I have. Of course. Without question. It's nice to be known. Let's jump into it. The first event.

is the 3 a.m. Marathon. Okay. Okay. So that is when you are desperately trying to sleep. You know that sleep is really good for you. You might have something you're doing early in the morning. And your brain is like, boom, time to run an overthinking marathon. You might be trying to solve a huge problem in your life.

You might be replaying something from the past. You might be coming up with business ideas. is, but effectively it's like your brain just not allowing you to go to sleep. Would physically decorating come under this? Because obviously what I was sitting there thinking, that must be really hard for you. But also, sometimes it's really hard for me. No, no, no, no, because that's like doing stuff. That's impulsivity.

Okay. This is me lying awake in the middle of the night, desperate to get to sleep. but my brain's not having any of it. And I'm like, I'm going to count sheep and then I'm back designing a flyer. I'm like, I'm going to do that deep breathing and then I'm trying to fix some deep family issue from 20 years ago.

Does that make you angry at your brain? Like, it must do, right? You must be like, why can't you just let me sleep? I've been working all day, I'm tired, you know I'm tired, I know I'm tired, we need to sleep. Yeah. And it's like, no, thank you. Yeah.

It happens to me less nowadays. because I have got a bit of a better sleep routine and I am often quite tired when I go to bed but it's like these random nights where my brain's just like, it's going to be insomnia and overthinking for you always want to have to get up early. It's always the way.

So yeah. Do you know what? I think a 3 am marathon might be good for the actual Olympics because it's cooler, right? I just, do you know what I mean? We should speak to the Olympic Committee. The next event is the catastrophe sprint.

Oh. So this is when something happens and you run from that thing to catastrophe in 10 seconds. What do you mean? So it might, it could be anything, but it might be a friend that normally uses a lot of emojis when they text me, not using any emojis. Oh, okay. And my brain sprints to, they're angry at me, the friendship's over. I've done something they're trying to tell me but I'm not sure what it is.

It could also be on an aeroplane when there's a bit of turbulence and you go from there's a bit of turbulence to I am literally about to die and I haven't done a will. This is you actually. Like I think better in recent years but I think the friendship thing is big.

Like I remember it wasn't even that long ago you had like some producers that you work with that didn't come to your show So you immediately went to, well, they don't care and they hate me. Oh, yeah. That was March this year. Versus they just had something else to do or whatever. Like, yeah, that's crazy.

It's always the sprint from like reality to worst case scenario. And it's fast. I am fast. I think I've probably set world records. Usain Bolt of sprinting into catastrophe. That's me, baby. Event number three, the analysis, paralysis, relay. Okay.

So this is when you have a decision that you're trying to pick a side, pick a lane on, trying to decide. Yeah. And you just go back and forward, back and forward. One day you're certain of what you're going to do. And then the next day you flip-flop and it changes. And you just torture yourself in this relay line. back and forth. I'm giving myself anxiety just thinking because that's me every day. What happens at the end of this? Is it just like a never-ending relay as well? Do you ever make a

decision? Well, do I ever make a decision? Well, you'd have to give me an example of when this is happening. So it could be a big thing. For example, my last person that managed me when I was deciding whether to leave. Oh, that took you a long time. It needed to get to like beyond bad for you to actually do it, didn't it? Yeah. So it could be that, but it also could be something small. What colour white to paint the hallway when we moved in? Okay. Like, can you remember how bad me choose in between ivory white, Indian white, Chilton off white, like the intensity of that decision? It baffles me why you would say, can I remember? Like, like I would ever forget it. I've never seen

so many sample pots of paint in my entire life. We nearly painted the whole wall much multi-coloured white. But then one day it would be like, it's the Chilton white. And then I'd freak out and be like, no, no, no, it's the Indian white. And I couldn't decide. I was so

petrified of committing to the wrong decision. So it might be huge stuff. Are you going to leave your job or your partner? It might be tiny weenie stuff. But the, like, paralysis is exactly the same. Can I also make the point is that when you go through this, what is it called relay what? This is the analysis paralysis relay. The analysis paralysis relay. Often after you've made

the decision, you'll still be like, did I make the right decision? Did I not? I don't know if I like it. Like it happens after you've actually made the decision. You're still passing the button even after you finished the race. Yeah, wow. Which is tiles as well. That was a thing. Yeah. Floor tiles. Oh God. oh dear that sounds awful it is awful and it's constant but I'm winning gold baby so silver linings or gold linings

okay event number four the hindsight's high jump I bet you had fun coming out of these didn't you this is basically reliving everything that you've

sort of done wrong in your past seeing what you did wrong and then like overthinking why you did it wrong and almost trying to like think your way into correcting the past which obviously you can't do so you end up just feeling rubbish about who you are today so for me this would be embarrassing things that I done when I used to get blackout drunk or past mistakes in relationships or past mistakes in family arguments and just ruminating on the past and just like, well, I made a massive mistake.

It really does. Like, I've witnessed this as well. It completely takes over your brain, doesn't it? Like, you, there's no space for anything else that when you're in one of these is all you can think about. Which is crazy because out of all of them, right, the hindsight one, that's the one you genuinely cannot, like, thinking about that literally. can't, like it is the past. It has happened. You can't think yourself into time travel

to change the part. So it's, I can totally see it's an absolute like waste of time, but yet I get stuck there pretty regularly. Yeah, you do. And then our final event, you'll love this one. Go on. Because this is a bit of you as well. The social, the social gymnastics floor routine. Okay. Like it. So this is just tying yourself. in knots before, during and after social events. So before it's, who's going to be there? Do I know them? Do I make eye contact? If it's a group, do I shake everyone's hand? All of that. When you're there, am I saying too much? Am I being rude? Do I need to offer to buy a drink? Oh my God, I've forgotten this person's name. And then when you leave, it's, did I say that thing? What do they

think of me? I've made a terrible impression. They must hate me. So it's like the backflips and the knots that we tie ourselves into for every single part of leaving the house. Okay, so thank you for the events. I like it, very creative, but also very real. I have witnessed all of these Olympic events. And I think you're right, you would be on the podium winning gold for each of these events, and I'm sure many of the listeners would as well. So I'm going to talk about, obviously both of them are really rooted in.

in overthinking. Both of what? Sorry, all of the events are rooted in overthinking. It's the overthinking Olympics, so. So let's explore why do you overthink? And I've got some thoughts. Have you been overthinking the thoughts? No, no, no.

I just thought of them, wrote them down. I'm going to go with it and I'm not going to second guess. Go on. The first is, I guess, just the fact that you've got ADHD for you and your brain is always racing. So, like, you've always got racing thoughts. It's like the neurodevelopmental condition you've got. Yeah.

There's sort of no getting away from it. Yeah. So a lot of people with ADHD will have racing thoughts. Very typically, that's kind of when the hyperactivity is turned inward. Very often that happens a lot more with women. Of course, it can happen to men and other people as well. But typically speaking, that's why women, have been missed because we were kind of sat there

overthinking Olympics there weren't any behaviours necessarily to see and that's that is that the inattentive that's inattentive versus hyperactive so like the naughty little boy in speech marks is in your head the naughty little boy

lives in my head causing chaos on a daily basis and yeah I think anxiety a lot of people that have ADHD also say that they have anxiety. Well, that's my next point. Oh. So don't jump the gun here.

The second is like the wiring of anxiety. So like, you know, we're not doctors, but most people with ADHD, it would be fair to say will suffer from some degree with anxiety. And if you think about that logically, of course they are because they've grown up their whole lives being scared to be criticized, rolling eyes, little microaggressions, like 20,000 more pieces of negative feedback than somebody that's neurotypical by the time they're like 18 or like, so there's got to be some level of anxiety. So I get it. It's like safety seeking and trying to be in control, like not wanting to, do you know what I mean?

Yeah, I think that's what it is. When you are overthinking, you're trying to control your environment and trying to control your life and not make any mistakes. I think ADHD is are petrified of making mistakes because we've lived our life making so many and being so judged for it. You just want to get it right. Yeah.

And there's also, I guess, a bit of perfectionism in there as well. Right, you're going on to my next one. Will you stop stealing my points, please? I'm so so that I'll go into the next one. obviously make sense in a chronological order because that's why I'm... And they just flow into each other without me even saying it. Perfectionism is the third one. Now, this is you, like, two a T.

If we were going to choose one of these, what's the event that goes with perfectionism? I think it affects all events. Okay. But you want to be the best in all events. But I guess that's like the paralysis one is quite often the perfectionism one, right? because you don't want to make a wrong decision. No, no, you are right there. The analysis paralysis relay, oh man, yeah, you don't want to make a wrong decision

and it's perfectionism. But again, right, I get it when, I don't know, I'm coming up with Dubby. I'm coming up with the colours and the name of Dubby, the body doubling up. And how many names we went through and they weren't right. and desperately wanting to get it perfect. That's almost an example of when perfectionism and trying to chase that can be fun in a creative world. But when it's about paint colours,

it's just unnecessary suffering. Like, it's okay if it's ivory white or chilton white. Like, the world isn't going to end. But in my brain, if I get that decision wrong, I'll be unhappy in that hallway forever. I would have let you down, the family down. Like, I need to pick the right specific shade of white or else it's the end of the world.

And that decision feels as intense for me as whether or not I should stay in a relationship or not. Not you, obviously. Well, I hope not. Historical relationships. It's so, you're so right, though, because, you know, with, stuff like Dubby, stuff like branding, the phrase done is better than perfect. I'm not sure

does apply because there's so many people out there trying to start social media accounts, new businesses that fail because they rush it and just get it done and it doesn't land. The marketing strategy is not good enough. The brand is not good enough. The colors aren't good. So that is where, and you touch done it, where it can be a brilliant thing. I actually think creative industries, but overthinkers, is a way to use that muscle that actually can cause so much pain in your own life to good. When I think about writing a song, overthinking, the lyrics, the sounds, the production, the artwork, well, that makes something that I'm proud of in the end or coming up with a name or a logo for the podcast. like that's putting your overthinking to create something rather than just ruminating in your own head.

Interesting and I completely agree with everything you've said. The only one sort of anomaly in it and I wonder this maybe is a different time to explore but quite often with your music you'll spend the time and you'll get it perfect, perfect, perfect, perfect. You'll do the whole album and then you'll be like, it's rubbish. I want to sack it off. I'm not releasing it. It's crap.

like that is that's you as well like and that I don't know what that is yeah like hold yourself to a well that's overthinking you hold yourself to like a perfectionistic standard you try and push to be the best you work yourself to the bone you get it done and then you're like oh actually I hate it that's just that's rough that's just the life of an overthinker and I guess look to wrap all of this up my fourth one is just a bit of a statement it's a bit of a flawed coping strategy right like you can never think your way to perfection you can never think your way to safety you can never think your way out of conflict or criticism like it just doesn't work no but for me and i know that yeah that's easy to say i get trapped in these cycles of like rumination

and it's it's just so hard to get out I'm able to recognize it now and you can recognize it in me. And I know it's futile, but it just plays and plays and like you can never turn it off. I still don't really know how to help you with it. There's a lot to do with your ADHD that I can really help and support. But it's like when I see you doing it, like say it's historically it's someone you've been working with that you don't really want to work. If you don't want to upset, me, you overthinking it. Is it going to be worse if you go somewhere else? Blah, blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, just do it. Like, just make a decision

and do it because it's absorbing your life. That's the equivalent of me saying, just set an alarm or leave earlier. Like, I don't know how to actually help you. I'm just like, just do it. Yeah, just give me a dice. Just pick a number and let the number. Flip a coin. Yeah. So, we're just going to take a very quick break and then we'll be back. Right. It is. podcast sponsorship time and I can't believe how lucky we are to have loop earplugs because it's something that we actually use. I can't leave the house with that one to be honest. So we haven't got a lie and pretend something's great when it's not because we actually love them. We have a website with loop earplugs where you can get 20% off our favourites. Now one thing that I used to

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So, we've got our overthinking. Olympic events and we know why ADHD is and the anxious among us tend to overthink to try to control perfectionism, all that jazz but what is the costs of competing in the Olympics because there is a cost like if you were in the actual

Olympics you'd have I don't know sore knees and need an ice bath it's got to be mental health right like it can't and you and you're probably likely to annoy yourself and other people I imagine. I don't know.

So I had potential relationship strain and you've gone with annoy yourself and other people. So, yeah, because if you're constantly over-analyzing a friendship or a work relationship, worrying about whether it's right, real, are they upset with you? Do you even want to be in it? How are you ever just going to chill out and, like, enjoy?

life and normal relationships. Yeah. And I imagine that it could be quite tiring to be in relationship with that kind of person. It's like, it's more like a feeling of of helplessness. For you?

For me, when I see you doing it and I'm like, and I don't mean to be mean when I say this, like logically in my mind, I'm like, why do you keep going over the same thing? Just make a decision, just do it. Like just whatever you do, even if it's the wrong decision, it don't even matter. Just make a decision and move on. Even if it's the wrong decision.

That just fills me with instant. Instant panic. So yeah, there is some relationship strain. There's also a load of lost time and bad sleep. Like the amount of hours I have spent worrying about paint colours, relationships, song titles, some perceived slight from years ago, some embarrassing thing I've done. Like, these records don't need to just play constantly. Like, I'm losing hours every day, honestly, to overthinking probably every day. It can be worse if I'm like triggered by something

into overthinking, like a situation happens or I feel a strong emotion. It's crazy because you this is this is the biggest one right like time is probably the most valuable commodity yeah and it's and it's not just it's obviously simple i'm wasting time doing that but it's there's more to it than that like what what happiness would you be feeling with that time what even if it's work related what could you be achieving with that time like it is an absolute devastator losing time to this and you are so much happen one happier when you are just present in the moment and too much more effective at everything you do, whether it's being music, ADHD love, like Blumers, Debbie, whatever it is. When you're not overthinking

something, whether it's family dynamics, a current decision, you're just, you're just better. Like you must be, you're happier and you're better. But I guess the strange thing is when I'm overthinking something, I'm trying to get to the end. I'm trying to work through the process, figure it out, get to the answer, but you'll never get there. The next one is decision fatigue. So you never actually end up making a decision. Like the tiles, like the colour paint, like if I'm going to leave my last manager, it was you never get there because you get there and then you overthink that thing.

You've made a mistake. Start switching. So you're living a life of just hopping between decisions, never settling, never committing, feeling anxious, feeling fearful, jumping back, balancing out, seeing both sides, like just make a bloody decision and deal with it. And then once it's made, it's made, move on. That's why, like, you know, we've had to stop me deciding where we go for dinner. Like, it's such a small example, but historically, I'd be like, I need to pick where we're

going for dinner because I'm going to give it more attention than you. I'd then hyper-focus on it I'd be looking at all the reviews on multiple sites I'd be trying to look for fake reviews I'd be trying to find pictures inside I'd be trying to look at the menu, the specials then I'd go to social media, Reddit I'd spend so many hours in research

that I'd tire myself out and wouldn't get to the answer because I'm so panicked that I haven't found the best pub for the Sunday roast on Sunday and it like it's like your brain goes we're going out for dinner

we've got one shot of this we're never going out for dinner again you get one so it has to be the best dinner that we've ever had whereas I'm like I'm hungry let's just go there if it's not very good we won't go there again we'll go somewhere else

but I love that so I've had to really give up finding the best place and all that research because you'll go do you want to go for dinner yeah. Now if we're going somewhere new, you'll just look up. Oh, that's five minutes wait and it's open. Let's go. It's a much simpler process. You don't fall in to the overthinking pit, which I'm very, very grateful for. But isn't it mad how we think about overthinking, we think about it's the big things. No, no, it's finding a Sunday roast or picking what to

watch next on Netflix. Like it infects every area of life and it sucks. Where it can be good though is picking hotels for holidays. You do still let me do that. You can carry on doing that. Because I will find a bargain, a luxury bargain. We'll find the one that you want to stay and then we'll find somewhere that's affordable. That's usually what happens. Okay, the last cost of competing is the sort of happiness and real life and creativity and piece that is stolen by mental loops. So you're going over and over and over where to go for a roast on Sunday or what

colour white to paint the hall or if you're going to leave your job. You aren't living. Like I wasn't, when we moved into this house, I wasn't here. I was just panicked by the huge decision of what shade of, white to go for. And I wasn't like enjoying having just bought a house for the first time or moving in with you. It was just like, oh, if I get this wrong, everything's over. And like, you just miss out on a load of happiness and vibes and chill. And that's a real shame. It's a shame. So we've got to try and find a way to stop competing. Now, I'm very happy to have you here because I feel like you are

our kind of expert underthinker, in comparison to me, like, you're probably quite normal. I don't know. All you are an underthinker. I like, I would agree, I think I am an underthinker. And I will talk through some ways to underthink. A caveat, though, I'm not sure that's the goal. I think like there's overthinking, thinking and underthinking. I think just thinking is maybe the goal.

But it's like for an overthinker, I think it's going to feel like underthinking. I'm going to try and not overthink the underthinking, so you start. Now, can I just make a point? All of this that I'm saying is easy to say. So I understand that. It might be harder to do, but I'm going to say it anyway. I love it. Come on. All right.

First one, can thinking change it? If it cannot, stop. I mean, I love that. Because if you're ruminating on the past, nothing can be changed. It's done. So, like, it's done. So there is, like, a logical safety net to, like, grab onto me on a plane in turbulence. It's going to go down.

I'm going to die. If you're going to die, like, have a vibe, have a cuddle. Like, it's okay. Like, my thinking isn't going to stop that happening. So I think that's just helpful. The problem is there's obviously some situations. like which white to paint the hallway, thinking, analyzing, that could help my decision. So like, that helps for some situations, some events, but not everything.

Maybe give yourself just a little period of time to think about it. And it's also fine to think about the past. If you're like, oh, that's a lesson learned. Move on. I know that lesson now. Like, then that's it. Oh, yeah, baby. Okay, next. This one helps actually.

So, like, movement stops. you do this a lot. I've heard you give this advice. So if you're talking or on a phone call or your brain's going a little bit much, get out and have a walk. Doesn't really help for the 3am marathons. No. But yes, in a sort of rumination cycle, movement, and I'd love to say it's a run or going to the gym. It's not. For me, it might be a dog walk. It really helps. I don't know. You get in nature. Something else is going on. You're filling your brain with other stimulus so it can just stop that cycle we know we know that exercise is so good for anxiety and for ADHD but you don't need to beat yourself up with the perfect exercise

and overthink that just a little walk or a little YouTube Joe Wicks whatever you love it whatever you can do love it I've got four left um write it down so there's a couple of ways to do this you can obviously journal have a little diary i like little pros and cons list especially if you're in decision paralysis just write the two options down pros cons each one make the decision emotion out of it mathematical i love that i massively like spew into my notes app that's where all my overthinking goes yeah and it's it is helpful because you feel like once you get it out of your head and onto the page or notes app, you've kind of got rid of it. So just get it out, write it down. Your notes app must be like Alice in Wonderland. Alice in Chaosland, maybe. Nice and simple

one. Reality check. So like, and usually use a friend or a close family member. Like, give them a call. You are my reality buddy. I will be like, do you think this means this person hates me? or do you think I've made a huge catastrophic mistake in my music career? And you'll very often help me just come back to grounded reality. And this is factually it works every time. If you have the right person, like a grounded person, just speaking it out loud will make you feel better. Like it will.

It will, yeah. It's doing it's hard though, because you'll usually be in your head for a couple of days first, if not longer. Yeah. Nice and simple one. Tolerate uncertainty. Who knows? The simple one.

It's simple, but it's not easy. And I think this is the core of all overthinking. We are desperate to be certain that our decisions are correct. And you can't be. So it's learning to go, I might paint this chill and white. And I might have preferred it a bit like, lighter and that's okay, I won't know until next year when I see summer on the walls. I might leave this job and it be the best thing ever, or I might leave and regret it.

You can't think your way. You just have to live it and learn on the way and then course correct if you've gone wrong or celebrate if you've gone right. We're going to make mistakes and we're not going to know what certain decisions, where they might lead us. And that's fine. If you never make a mistake, you sort of never learn anything. do you?

Well, you'd think I would have learned a lot, but... And then the last one is fairly tough, but it's like, because it requires quite a high level of self-awareness, but like having the ability to recognise when you're overthinking and then using that for knowledge. So like the plane analogy, you're thinking, oh my God, the engine's going to stop. What happens if a bird flies in?

What's going to happen? Like, the reason that you're overthinking is that you're afraid of flying. It's simple as that. Like, and it's understanding that is why you're doing it. Or you're afraid of conflict or whatever it is. There'll be a reason for you to overthink. So almost like the overthinking is acting as a terrible band-aid to an underlying emotion. And actually, can you figure out what is that emotion?

So, yeah, I'm scared of flying. So my brain's trying to find safety by thinking. in a friendship if someone doesn't come to a show and I'm overthinking what that means. Oh, I felt a bit sad that you weren't there. And you're scared to bring it up. You're sad that they weren't there. There's an emotional impact.

You're a bit afraid of bringing it up because you're scared of what the consequences of that might be so you overthink it. I love that. Drop down to reality. I'm going to try and practice that. That's it. It's the overthinking Olympics episode.

We hope that you've enjoyed it. If you have, give us a like. subscribe, a follow, and we really encourage you to stop competing in the awful games. And if you haven't enjoyed it, don't overthink it. Just move on. Here's your gold medal. Enjoy.