LATE BLOOMERS - SORRY I’M LATE: The painful truth about feeling behind in life, love, and work

Episode Date: June 11, 2025

Ever felt like you’re running behind in life—while everyone else is ticking boxes, buying homes, and smashing careers? In this brutally honest episode, Rox and Rich unpack what it really means to be a “late bloomer.” From chaotic finances to relationship disasters and career false starts, they explore the deep shame that can come with feeling like you're years behind your peers—and how ADHD, trauma, and a lack of support often fuel that spiral. Rox opens up about hitting rock bottom in all three areas—money, love, and work—by her mid-thirties. She shares the terrifying debt, the hyperfocus heartbreaks, and the endless job hopping that left her feeling broken and hopeless. But through small steps, vulnerability, and a hell of a lot of therapy, she began to rebuild—and Rich, the bank manager she accidentally fell in love with, helped her see that being “late” doesn’t mean you’re lost. Whether you’re in your twenties, thirties, or fifties, this episode is a love letter to anyone who feels behind. It’s not too late to start again. It’s not too late to change your story. And it’s definitely not too late to create a life that finally fits. This one’s for the screwups, the slow starters, and the quietly resilient. You’re right on time.

Sorry, I'm late. A phrase that I know really well and a load of our listeners are going to know really well. But what if I told you we're not talking about being late to meetings or to dinner, but something else? So this week we're going to talk about why you might feel like you are a bit behind or late in life in big areas like finances, work, or what was the other one? Relationships. Oh yeah, relationships. how could I forget? Loads of people with ADHD or trauma or neurodivergence end up feeling like they are late to their own lives and you can end up feeling behind and ashamed

and you feel rubbish. This is Late Bloomers. Where we are actually getting our lives together a little bit late. But eventually. Do do do. Oh man. So we're not talking about you just being late

for like everything that you say you're gonna be there for. We're not talking about that. Cause that's a thing also. That's also a thing. No, but however, what happens in the micro happens in the macro. So maybe someone that chronically struggles with time is gonna struggle with being on time in their actual life.

True. I think that you as a person, you as an entity is a pretty perfect case study for this exercise. So work, finances, relationships. Obviously I know you really intimately and you sort of tick all those three boxes for being pretty late? Yeah, basically flopping hard in relationships, flopping hard at work, flopping hard with finance. I have messed up every single one of life's most important areas for my

entire life up until about late thirties. I'm so sorry. I've gone complete immature mode when you said flopping hard in relationships. I just imagined what it would be like for me saying those words. That is a different topic, isn't it? Coming next week. Yeah, can you imagine? If you're flopping hard on relationships, tuning...

No, I don't think we can do that. Are you talking about... You know what I'm talking about, I can't say it. No, I didn't. I thought you meant flopping as in not... On the flop is like a... Sorry, I can't say. No, I didn't. I thought you meant flopping as in not... On the flop is like a... sorry, like an actual saying. Anyway. You do know that this podcast, we have labeled it as self-help. Yeah, and that is an area that a lot of people need self-help in.

Anyway, we're digressing. If we were at... we would talk about it though, because we talk about anything. Yeah, okay. But we're not. So let's get back to point. I'm so sorry. I've like railroaded in my immature brain. So let's start one by one. Sure. You get to pick what we delve into first.

What my three flops? Your three flops, your relationship, work or finances. Where do you want to start? Let's talk about flopping hard in finances. Okay, right, interesting. So, fire away then, I suppose. Like, I obviously know the story. It was one of the first conversations that we had that you thought we were going to break up about. So, do you want to share that maybe as a start point? Yeah, when we met, I was mid thirties. So were you. You had two kids and a well paid job. You were an adult. I saw you as like an effective adult. And then

there was me who was in loads of debt, had a terrible credit rating. I couldn't afford a 300 pound a month rent when we met. So I was just so ashamed and so embarrassed. Like how have I got to my mid thirties? And I've worked all my life. How have I got to my mid thirties? And I'm just such a mess. Well, how have you? Let's go into that first. How does that happen? Because you've worked, you've earned quite reasonable money throughout that time as well.

It's not like, you know, you had, it went up and down, but there were certainly periods where you weren't quite well, but you had sort of nothing to show for it really. Nothing to show for it. So, so total lack of planning or saving. So never, ever save money. If I had the money, I spent it. If I didn't have the money, I'd find a way to get it. I just constantly felt like I was on the breadline. And even if there was moments in my life when I had jobs. Not like creative self-employed jobs, actual paid jobs, but I would overspend on that. It's like whatever I had, I spent. I have problems with overspending, impulsivity. Just doing ridiculous things. Things that would make you, for example, when I was in my late twenties, so I'm in debt, I'm struggling to pay rent in my basement flat and I was selling my vocals for like 500 quid a song. So I'd try and write a song

just to pay rent. But if I was going out on a night out, I would book an Uber Lux. Yeah. So it would cost me 30 quid to go like five minutes. And it, versus a tenner. So just like- Versus getting the bus. Yeah. But it was like, I could almost like I got happiness from, it's so strange. I got happiness from overspending, but then the overspending caused me such a terrible time.

It's super interesting because, you know, when we talk about where you are now, those habits and that dopamine that you get from overspending or booking a new belux, I would say they're still there. Like, as in, you may not act on them all the time, but you definitely love a bit of luxury, don't you? You love getting a new belux. So that's still there. Those behaviours are still sort of inbuilt into you. Oh, I love spending money that I don't have. It's just, it's that dopamine hit of buying the most expensive thing, of researching something.

It brings happiness into a life where sometimes I can struggle with daily joy and that dopamine that might be there just from living. I'm trying to inject it in. So, I mean, you probably don't even need to confirm this, but that is incredibly stressful, I would imagine, going through, you know, it feels lovely when you're buying new things, but it definitely doesn't feel lovely when you're having to live the aftermath of those decisions. It's just stealing.

You're stealing some of tomorrow's happiness to feel the instant hit of something. And then you wake up and you have to deal with that credit card bill. You have to deal with getting your electricity shut off. I remember not having a phone contract for two years. So I was just on wifi. Like just honestly, like it just, I was such a state and I was so all over the place, but I didn't know how to fix it. I didn't have anyone to help me. And as life went further and further on, you think about those behaviours, I can't pay rent, I'm not connected to a phone. My friends were buying their second houses, having their second kids being promoted to directors. Like the gap between me and my peers just got wider and wider and wider. And what at 24 was quite

funny, I'm still out going out drinking, spending money, are you just in your job, whatever. By 34, that gap is so shameful and so like horrible to look at. Well, touching on the shame, you know, I remember I was standing outside of Lily's school waiting to pick her up from school when we had first got together or getting together and you rang me and was like, I've got something really serious to talk to you about. And I was like, brilliant. That's, that's the end of the relationship. Obviously that's where my mind went. And then you were like, oh, I've got a really bad credit rate in.

Like if we were maybe going to think about buying a house, I'm really bad with money. And I'm not sure you'd want to, you'd want to be with me. Like, you know, I really simplified that, but that's effectively what it was. And I remember sort of smiling to myself for two reasons. One is, well, you're just about to get into a relationship with a bank manager. So if there's somebody better to help you with this, I don't think there is anyone better to help you with this. And number two, and the real reason I smiled is like, do you think that my Tinder profile would just say must have good credit scored? Must have a good credit score or don't bother replying?

Or don't bother replying. They're like, yes. I hated myself so deeply for the mess I'd made of my finances to be mid thirties with nothing to show for my life. I thought you were going to hate me for that too, or shame me or reject me. Yeah. Cause that's all I'd ever known. It's brutal. So I reckon that loads of our listeners will be resonating with this, especially

those with ADHD is pretty well documented that they struggle with finances. So I suppose, I suppose what is important in this is what did you do? Cause you're not there now. I started shagging a bank manager. Oh my God. You set the table. Oh my God. I started with on the fluff and you, oh dear.

I'm sorry. But I told some, I told you. Is that the first time you'd really shared? Yeah. None of my friends knew how bad it was. Cause as a coping mechanism, when you're like a total mess and your life is falling apart, you often like act like it's fine, like you have whatever, like bailiffs at the door. Like you, you wear it like this identity of being the wreckhead, the mess, like I don't subscribe to life's rules because if you weren't making light of it and wearing it with honor, I don't know sometimes if you'd get through the day. So, So I'd really avoided it. So nobody knew how bad it was. Maybe my dad knew a bit, but he had really rejected me and made me feel terrible

for how bad I was with money. So I think I was probably expecting that from you. I was just doing the old classic projecting. So it was talking to someone, it was facing up to it and it's really difficult thing to do to open the letters, to look at your bank account. It felt like to me, I was never ever ever going to be on top of it. How do you get out of 40 grand's worth of debt? How do you move from a very poor credit rating? How do you get the CCJs off file? I won't ever be able to do it. So like, why bother starting? I'm so far behind.

I'm never going to own a house. I'm never going to have savings. So I may as well just stay where I am. I think it's little things as well. If I think about how I helped you, you know, you've touched on it there around opening letters and just doing one thing at a time. It's probably easier now, I would imagine. But, you know, even a few years ago, if I break it down step by step, think about a regular bill. If you couldn't set up a direct debit online and you had to make a phone call,

which was often the case, it wouldn't have got set up. Then you would have got a paper bill that wouldn't have got opened. And that is that isn't it? It's those little micro things that you would struggle with that generate this massive problem. A hundred percent. Cause if you don't open 20 letters, you're getting a letter from the government. Or someone's turn up.

And if you don't open that. I mean, I've had court letters and ignored them too. Right. Didn't know about that. Yeah, well, we'll talk about that later. I mean, it was like 10 years ago, so it's off my record now. But yeah, I think the shame of hating where you are financially stops you from asking for help. You see everyone else doing well, especially online makes it worse. You just

feel even more rubbish. So you almost like double down on when there's well overspend. So like talking to someone and just having this mentality of tiny little steps. Like you don't go from very poor to excellent credit rating overnight. It took me two years. And that's very difficult as well for someone that thinks all or nothing and I either want to fix it tonight or it's, I can't do it. So it's leaning into those little micro steps. It's setting up the payment plan for the credit card. It's speaking to the government for the payment plan for the credit card, it's speaking to the government for a payment plan for the tax.

I think you've nailed it though. We could probably move on to relationships soon, but to summarise how you got out of it, you're not going to be brilliant at it. You never will, you're still not. But finding somebody safe, and that can be a parent or a friend or a partner that you know you can be super, super vulnerable with, you might feel stupid because you feel that society thinks you should be able to do this. So you need to find that person that doesn't like laugh at you. And then get help. Like you probably don't mind admitting that you need help now with

finances. You probably always will need help. I couldn't do it alone and I can't do it alone, but with help I'm so much more protected. Still sometimes make some silly decisions. It's very, very different. And I don't feel hopeless anymore. And last year we bought a house together. I never ever thought I'd be able to do that. So things can change with small steps. On that, that's a beautiful segue into relationships. Now this is a juicy one, I reckon. People are going to love to hear about your relationship history. Just thinking, isn't it crazy how I messed up money, relationships and work? Like not

just one area. No, all of it. Cross the board. Yeah. Triple threat. Smashed it, like all areas. Oh, if I was being measured on how much you could ruin it. I've won, I've set records. Yeah. But it does show you that you're not, it's not like you're bad at something.

You are struggling with something across the board, which is essentially living a full happy life with support where you make decisions that are good for yourself. And it's so important to say that, of course it relates to ADHD, but it also relates to trauma and people that, if you hate yourself, it's very difficult to take action towards treating yourself like you love yourself. So yeah. But wait, on that note, and I think this is super important, right? Because we're talking about different topics that you've messed up in. We've chatted before about how they feed each other. And actually potentially one of the most important things was finances stroke organization, because when you're not worrying about that all of the time,

it gives you capacity to maybe be better in relationships or better in work like that. And I suppose it's what's the thing that's literally keeping you up at night. You can be messed up on everything, right? But what's the thing that you look like really losing sleep about? Being kicked out of your house, being taken to court. How can you expect to be good in other areas when you're consumed about that? Yeah, to be honest, I think I probably used relationships as a way to avoid dealing

with how bad my finances were. Cause I was constantly falling in love and having all those wonderful chemicals in the first few months of a relationship. It feels like bloody being on drugs. But your real search was for the bank manager, innit? That's it. If only I'd known all those years ago. I was a mess at 24.

Oh, we would have been carnage. So yeah, relationships. I always felt like I wanted, all I wanted was a long-term stable relationship. So I've got a very long-term monogamous soul, but I couldn't, like couldn't it? I'd be obsessed with someone, I'd fall in love, things would move really quickly. And then I'd struggle with physical intimacy after about six months. And I had no life skills, had no therapy, had no understanding of my history. I'd kept it all silent, try and force through and then would end up just having my eye turned somewhere else and then leaving. And then I just had back to back

relationships over the period probably from 16 to 34. Not only were they back to back, there was also crossover like this guy from school was always in the background and this girl who I might always go back to. Like there was multiple levels of people that could be life partners all over across it, like absolute mess, babe, to be honest with you. The, um, obviously, you know, your past trauma, all of that relates to it, but I think it is also worth mentioning that this is another pretty well documented thing that ADHD people can struggle with with regards to relationships. And I certainly felt it being on the receiving end, like they're your hyper focus at the beginning, right? You're

obsessed with them. And then inevitably, like they always do, the hyper focus subsides. And it's that is the point. And I just think back, I obviously wasn't in any of your previous relationships, but I know that would have happened to everyone. And it's like, what do you do then? I think the difference when it's ADHD is the extreme way that you feel that fall off. So for everyone, the honeymoon's unreal. And then it goes a little bit more boring. And then you're like, cool, like this is because there's loads of awesome stuff that happens in the boring. In fact, I now know that it's the boring bit is the best bit of the whole thing.

Yeah. But it takes some sticking power to get there and some trust that that's where you're going. But when it's ADHD, it's like your brain is filled with the chemicals that we don't have, the dopamine, the happiness, you're motivated, you can do anything. And then you lose that and it's like losing your medication. Yeah. Um, it re you really, really fall hard. So then often people go in, go and search for that to find that hit again.

And it's just a cycle. So to figure out like, to figure out how to stay and how to build happiness. Cause actually ADHD is need stability. And how would you, if you, I mean, I know that's a complex layered question, but what advice would you give to how, and like, how do you figure that out? I think the first thing for me was realizing that I was the problem. I was the problem. In life, it is so easy to look at our exes, look at anything, but we're talking about relationships. They were abusive. They were this, she was that. It's so easy to blame others. And I always did. I always had a story for why it was someone else's fault. And I never ever looked hard in the

mirror at what I was bringing. And when I had my last serious breakup at 34, I think I was, there was too much evidence for me to ignore. I looked back and I saw these 10 people behind me. Everyone I was convinced was a life partner. Everyone ended up with a horrible breakup. I was like, what's the common denominator? Oh no. Something is wrong with me. I'm bringing something wrong to these relationships and I have to deal with it. So it's like having the bravery to really look your own pattern in the face. And that is hard to do. It's really hard to do. Yeah. Well, and then what do you, you know, when you get that realization, oh, actually it's me. Where'd you go from there? I suppose the therapy room.

I was extreme. So I was like, I'm an alcoholic. I'm a sex addict. I'm stopping. I'm never touching anyone again. So I went fully celibate. Or monk mode. I went monk mode, which is so me. It's so on brand.

It's all or nothing. Like I see the funny side, but in the middle of a crisis, I needed something so, I needed a huge change. It was like a personal intervention. Put myself on the bench because it was like, I'm not going through another breakup. I'm not doing it. I'm not falling in love, thinking they're the one, moving in, moving out. It's heartbreaking. Um, so I went monk mode without sex or alcohol. I had a mental breakdown because I was obviously using them as coping strategies for a whole host of rubbish stuff, not processing the death of my mom, not processing all my dad's affairs that they were the two main things. So have a

mental breakdown, get into therapy and then obviously therapy is so much about relationships and so I guess it's notice your own patterns, get into therapy and then give it another go. You know it's like driving tests. You can do all the theory you want, but you got to get in a car and you have got to try and drive again. So when I met you, I didn't feel ready. I was scared I was going to do it again. I didn't think I had the skills, but I had to just, I had to just try. And thank God it worked.

Probably the biggest difference though is, you know, those feelings of hyper-focus, wearing off, it getting a bit boring. You definitely had those feelings, but the difference is rather than go somewhere else or leave, you were just honest about it. You were like, I'm really struggling. This is how I'm feeling. This is where, this is the point in the relationship that I always leave. Um, but I don't want to do that. I want, but, and I want to be honest with you. And that was, that was tough, right? For you. Tough for me. Oh, it's horrendous. You found the literal love of your life. You're in therapy, you've done all this work. Everything's amazing. And I feel like I have a crush on someone

else. Feeling like it was happening again, but- Well, ugly, by the way. Stop. I'm not saying who. Stop. Sorry, you can't take the mick out of my, on the flop. Fine. And not-

Yeah, it was brutal, but actually that convo and how we worked through it, that dropped us into the actual place. Full trust. We're in it together on the same team. And like, it's never happened again. No. I've had like a clean run and I think so have you. I hope you have. Yeah, I'll tell you. So yeah, I think, again, similar to finances, right? It takes time. It's taken me years to get that better credit rating. It's taken us

years to find true safety and like being totally besties, totally on the same team. If you've had a bit of a shocker for a decade or two decades, it's going to take time. So you've got to give yourself time. And the problem with feeling late is you feel like you have to rush. You have to correct it now. I need to fix my finances now. I need to marry the one I'm with now. You're running late. You actually have to slow down so you can make sure you're on the right path.

And you don't make the same mistakes again. Yeah. Don't make the same mistakes. Very good advice. Right. Listen, we've got one more topic, work. And we haven't got that long. Okay. So this one can go on for a while. So work. You're a banker, weren't you, at one point? I've been a banker, a trainee accountant, I've worked in a fish and chip shop, I've

worked in a bar, I've worked in a charity, I've worked in a beauty magazine. Was the fish and chip shop wicked? Like I would love that I reckon. So Nicky, for the listeners that don't know, we have an app called Dubby. It's a body doubling app where we run group sessions every day to just get your washing done and things like that. And Nicky is one of our original hosts. Now Nikki is a long-term friend of mine, known each other since we were 12. And Nikki and I worked in the fish and chips shop together. I swear it was a lot. We loved it. And you had all the

fish and chips you could eat after your shift. You were on your feet, so it's hard work, but wrapping, learning how to wrap. Unbelievable. Loved it. Did you eat fish and chips every shift? I only did three shifts a week, but yeah, I'd take it home and all my family would eat it as well. Wow. Fish and chips three times a day. I'd be huge. Yeah, but you're on your feet. You're working. Absolutely loved it. Absolutely loved it. Anyway, sorry. I digress talking about fish and chips. You said I needed to be quicker and you were digressing.

Sorry, I know. Anyway, so look I digress talking about future chips. You said I needed to be quick and you were digressing. Anyway, so look, I've had a million jobs, always convinced it's the next life purpose and I'm going to stick it out. Even now that happens. Even now that happens. And yeah, it never is. And I always get it wrong. And I have been in jobs that I've hated and I've forced myself

to stay and then end up a burnt out mess. I've been fired from jobs. I've left jobs by never showing up again. Oh man. Honestly, like just what a mess I've been in all three areas. I think this one's a bit different, isn't it? Because I don't think the goal is to stay in a job you don't like. Like, I understand that some people will have to do that. So I've got families to feed or whatever, but still encourage them to, to, to, is there a way to do something that you love? You found your forever fixation, you call it in music.

Yeah. Um, but you just couldn't work an office job. Like it's not. Oh, it's, I did though, because when I left uni, I did what all my mates did. We got a graduate job. I was training to be an accountant within my first three months. My mom died. And I was there trying be an accountant within my first three months, my mum died. And I was there trying to do it. Oh my God, awful. I don't think I ever would have been able

to make it through the accountancy training, but like I wasn't really on the same level as everyone else. My mum's just died of cancer. Like no wonder I was having a tough time. Clearly that's tragic and that would have had an impact. Yes. Can I also say like, I love you are the most talented person I know, but I'm going to be real with you. I can't see you being an accountant. The fact that the first bit of this podcast was like how tragic I am with money. Yeah. And maths, right? Like patterns and I'd... I struggle with maths. I'm more of a words person. It was just what you were meant to do. It's what my mates were doing. So I just copied. I'm good in an interview. I can fake

it in an interview and then flop hard on the job. Oh my god, right. So that's important. I reckon if you've got ADHD, you will be amazing at interviews, whatever the job is. Because you will hyper focus last minute, all night. You'll read the questions, you'll go into the company, you'll wear the mask. We're amazing at masking. So we can mask as the best employee ever, ready to come and work hard for you and be happy. And on top of things, I got every job I applied for. Even, I remember trying to get a job as an assistant in a beauty magazine and it was like really difficult to get. And I wrote a cover letter, I put sparkles in it, I sprayed it with perfume, like found the address of the editor. Like just going above and beyond to get the job and then didn't work out and

then failing. So yeah, then I've, I've worked in a bank, I've been an assistant, so many different things. Um, I always have fond memories for working in a pub because I didn't feel like I was failing and I didn't feel like I was burning out. I liked being on my feet. I liked working with my hands, chatting to people. I was obviously an alcoholic as well. The one thing that was always there in the background was music. I never thought of it as a job. Didn't really get into it until early twenties. even that's late.

Even when I started I was late. It is in that industry, yeah. In that industry. But music very quickly became the thing that I wanted to do and probably kept me alive at times. Because I didn't have much to believe in, but I could believe that my music was worth something that I wanted to show it to the world. It's a bit sad because it makes me just think it's music, another coping mechanism. But I never got bored of it. I always loved writing songs. I always loved singing. I always loved the art and I was desperate to make it work. I didn't

have any money, so I did it on and off. So you're obviously maybe a bit fortunate in that you found success in your passion. Let me challenge it a bit though. So the reason that we're able to buy a house and live is because you are an app developer, an author, and a social media influencer. None of those things have been your passions. So how have you stuck that out? Oh no, Dubby is like, Dubby is my absolute passion. I'm obsessed with Dubby. I wear a Dubby t-shirt.

But being an app developer wasn't a thing that you aspired to do. Now it is, but you didn't really even know about it. So it's just, it's that creating, I suppose. Yeah. I feel like music and app development and writing books, there's a lot of crossover. You're, you're envisioning something, whether it's a music video, the end of a book or someone using a body doubling app to clean the kitchen. Yeah.

And you bring it to life. So maybe creativity is my forever fixation. I always thought it was just music, but maybe it's creativity as a whole. And that's take, I mean, I'm 40. You are, yeah. I'm 40 and only five years ago was when I was in the middle of finance and relationship total breakdowns. So, sorry, six years ago. So, like no wonder work wasn't working. Like if you are in debt, if you're going through horrible breakups all the time involved in all this drama, you ain't going to have the time and mental capacity to bring to fruition the talents

that you do have to offer the world. So for me, that kind of came last. And it makes sense, right? Because you're not going to be able to sit down and have creative meetings and stuff if you're worried about someone knocking at your door. The weird thing is like I managed to keep going with music, even in my worst days. In fact, on my worst days, I would be at the piano writing a song, uploading a little thing to YouTube, adding friends on MySpace or Facebook.

Like it has been a lifeline that's been with me since my early twenties. Yeah. It's probably why I just love it so much. I think so many people in creative industries just think, let's talk about music. It has to happen in your 20s or else it's never going to happen. And you know, you had the X Factor over 25s who are seen as the lucky oldies getting a second chance. I just hate that man.

Like I hate that. Not everybody gets to have a great first experience in music or their creative path. Lots of people's first businesses fail. Lots of people fail in music. You fully have the right to stand up and go again. I stood up and went again four or five times. Loads of failed projects. And it wasn't till 36, 37, started doing Rory and that started to work. So for those not in music, what would, what advice would you be in the, in the work front? So it's really cringe, but obviously like you have to be doing something that you're never going to quit. Like I should have quit music a million times.

I couldn't. Cause it was like inbuilt into my bones, unfortunately. So it has to be, if it's creative, it has to be something you would like live and die for because it's too hard otherwise to go through all the challenges it will put you through. A second thing, you can't build like your wonderful creative castle on the sand when you're in debt, when you're having relationship struggles. Like a creative job is chaos by nature. You need stability at home. You need stable finances. You need a good relationship. You need somewhere to live. And that might mean putting creativity has to like come second. You have to like work, you have to get to that place. Like I tried to build so many different artists

projects and it's never worked because I wasn't building on anything stable. I was a wreck trying to use it to save myself. Whereas now I've got stability and I can build it to express myself. It's really, really different. If you've got a choice, don't do it. If you can not do your creative job and be happy somewhere else, pick the stability. I'd honestly say that. And also just like totally chill out on the time thing. When I got into music, I'm so old, I was going to laugh at me, what an embarrassment. I was so full of shame and self doubt. And I've realised nobody gives a shit. In fact, people like the fact that I'm out there 40, trying to be a rock star.

Um, it's your self hatred getting in the way. It's your own brain telling you you're not good enough. Get rid of that voice. Get yourself on the old interwebs. It's not just music, there's loads of people that haven't found success until later in life. Those comedians, business entrepreneurs, like loads. When they're 50, you've still got time to carve out that thing. And I think that's kind of the summary of all these things. You have still got time, if there's air in your lungs, you've got today to start making those small changes and the feeling of being late in life can bring up so much shame. Being in debt, not having the job that you've wanted, not work out, having relationship

struggles, but it isn't the end. You get to see that pattern. You probably need some help and you get to like start again. And I saw this picture yesterday, went on Facebook to do something and I saw a throwback picture from nine years ago. And I was in the middle of a job I hated. I had issues with alcohol and substances, relationship problems. Nine years ago. That's not that long ago. I was on my ass. And then it's only five years ago we got together. Money's transformed, relationships transformed, bought a house, jobs transformed. Like you do not have to do it overnight, but you can make insane changes in a year. Three years, five years, 10 years, just by making those tiny changes every day.

And on that note, we are well overrun today. So sorry. Sorry if you're any other. I talk too much. If you're any other. Sorry, I hate I talk too much. If you're any other half an hour window, apologies. But hopefully you have enjoyed today. If you have, leave a review, comment, do all of those sorts of things. And if you haven't, move on. Lovely to see you and we'll see you next week.