Leah on the Line - 114: Should I forgive my fiancé for cheating with his girl best friend?

Episode Date: August 5, 2024

Hey babes! Welcome back to another episode of Leah on the Line. Thank you so much for all of your love and support on the podcast, it honestly means the world to me. I hope you love this one!Head to leahontheline.com to send in your dilemmas. Love you! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey hey hey you guys what is up welcome back welcome back take a seat take a seat you guys come in come in come in oh my god do you remember that in school? Come in. Come on in. Morning. Morning. Do you know what? I was talking about school recently, right? I went to the fucking shittest school ever. Like my school was just shit, right? They- the bullying, they were like turn it up a notch. Do you know what I mean? Oh, you've been bullied? Good. That was their mentality, right? But also like the teachers just didn't give a shit. Like mentality right but also like the teachers just didn't give a shit like no one in my school was particularly intelligent not even joking like we had

two halves of the year and it was kind of like not like the dumb side and the smart side you guys but like basically foundation and higher it was called I don't know if it's sort of thing and you you get capped. If you're in foundation, you're capped at C. Okay? I was in foundation. You know what that means? I can't possibly have A's. I did get bunked up to higher in English and Spanish, but um, that's because I was just so Hola, me llamo Lia. Odeo el colegio. Es muy malo. Sometimes I like speak Spanish and I give myself a kick, so bad.

But anyway, what's my point? Oh yeah, so we were talking about it recently about teachers and like, I feel like a lot of people have like that teacher that they just remember and they were amazing to them and they really helped them excel in certain subjects. I didn't have a single teacher that I think actually wanted to do this as a job. They all just didn't want to be there or at least maybe because the school was feral, the school was so bad at controlling

their kids that the school was feral so like they would of course they're gonna hate the fucking kids but yeah like I didn't have a teacher where I look back and I think oh I loved her so much. I did kind of have my English teacher but she wasn't nothing special she just wasn't a bitch like the rest like so I put her on a pedestal my Spanish teacher she was terrifying but she helped me learn because I was scared of her like I would not fuck about in her lessons or talk to my friends because first of all she set the tone from day one you're not sitting with your friends that's not gonna fucking happen in this classroom Okay, you're not here to have fun. That was the tone. She said I said fuck this shit. This is fucking shit, right?

She said you're not sitting with your friends nowhere near them in fact, and then we'd go. Oh me and Jess We hate each other. Ha ha ha. Yeah, she didn't fall for it. Um You're not sitting near your fucking friends, you're here to learn, don't fuck about and she would come and call you out when you wasn't ready and you you learn very quickly, this teacher will just point me out in front of everyone and ask me for the answer so I better be paying attention you know and because she sort of set that tone early doors I was listening, I was paying attention and I Got some pretty good grades in my Spanish assessments, so

Maybe being a bitch does help because you know what like obviously people say that private schools are like really strict and stuff but the results are insane like the kids come out genuinely fucking more intelligent and My school people was making the teachers cry It's how it's Helen there. Honestly, I would go to my teachers and be like This girl is bullying us all she bullies us all we all pretend that we're ill So we don't have to come in in the morning because we're that scared of her and they'll do not the same Stay away from her. Oh That's fucking genius size. That's fucking genius. Seriously. Seriously, you're fucking genius that

That's that's just about changed my life as You fucking idiot. Do you actually think like I'm so sorry. I just hope people don't say that to kids anymore Like, I'm so sorry, I just hope people don't say that to kids anymore. I'd go to my teacher and say, this girl, she's a bully, right, she's bullying us all, she pushed me on the floor at lunchtime today in front of everyone, spat on me, in front of everyone, right? Stay away from her. Oh, okay. But I quite literally did that.

Me, Jess, our other two friends, we would hide in the science block just for a bit of peace. Not like hide like, oh my god, we're petrified. Not like that. We would just, we stopped associating ourselves with anyone else and it was just like the four of us. And this was in like year 9 or 10. I want to say year 10. And we just used to like sit in the science block and just sit on the floor and eat our lunch and we were so much happier then. It was like, oh, we were safe and it was quite pleasant, seriously. But honestly, I don't know what I'm talking about guys.

Oh, what do I have to fill you in on? Oh guys, guess where I'm going on Thursday. This comes out on Tuesday. The Thursday this week this comes out. God, that was confusing. Guess where I'm going to be. Just guess, right? should I shoot a game? It's the premiere

That's not there You're probably thinking that wasn't much of a game. You just told us No, guess the film Some clues. I'm buzzing about it We've spoke about it Blake Lively's in it We've read it we've all. Gets most of us into reading. It ends of us. It ends of us the movie. I'm going to the premiere.

What?! What?! Are you kidding me?! Guys, I've never been to a premiere before. Because, well, to be honest, do I need to say why you guys know me well enough to know that I'm just terrified of anything outside of my comfort zone? But I used to always be like, especially when I was a kid Kate, I was a weird teenager. Let me tell you about myself as a teenager. I was a weird, weird kid. I was so obsessed with like all actors and singers. So like the whole Disney lot, I'm talking Selena, Demi, Joe, Nick, Kevin, not so much Kevin, sorry Kevin, love you. You know, I was into their date in life, Kevin, you was like basically married from the age I was like seven, so, uh, Zach, Vanessa, Ashley, who else? Um, um, but anyway, basically I was obsessed, obsessed with the Disney lot and I was just

addicted to like watching them do real life stuff. Like I used to Google and YouTube like Miley Cyrus rares, Selena Gomez rares and look for rare pictures of them. Um, is there something okay? Like is that something missing in my brain? Like my mental health should have been studied at that age. Like that is that norm? It's not normal behavior. I fear and I would watch them like on all these carpets,

all these awards, like kids choice, teens choice, the MVAs, you know, like I was hooked. And when they were coming up, I was like, Justin and Selena are gonna go together. And then it'd be like, oh my God, like Miley, Zach dropped a condom on the carpet once. That was some real tea. I was like, that dirty, dirty dog.

And I was so obsessed with their real lives and paparazzi videos, I would honestly eat them up. I was eating that shit up on the daily. You know, like just Jared, and I never know how you say that. And I was so into the celebrity tea, celebrity life, celebrity tea celebrity life celebrity tea It's weird like that's weird. There's something wrong with me, but no one around me was like that

None of my friends at school were interested. It was just me. I honestly I just found it really just fascinating like this whole Hollywood Life, I found it so fascinating, right? and I used to always think to myself, like, God, imagine being at these places where there's people just walking a carpet around you. And although I have heard word on the street that this is a hybrid between a movie screening and a premiere, not like a proper premiere,

but then somebody else I spoke to said that it is a premiere premiere, but then somebody else I spoke to was like, no, I think it but then somebody else I spoke to was like no I think it's gonna be like super casual so honestly then don't know what to expect but Teenage Leia is eating this up right now she is in her fangirl element and I'm excited I'm so excited to do the debrief with you guys and how you guys gonna buy it but the best part of the night I get to watch the fucking movie guys I also already booked my tickets to the cinema with my mum on the Friday. The premiere's on the Thursday, so I'm literally gonna watch it twice in a row, and I have zero complaints.

Couldn't be happier. I may book to see it for a third. You know, we'll see how it is, but... I'm so excited. I don't know why I'm so excited. It almost feels like Christmas Eve, and you know when you don't want Christmas Day to come Like you feel a bit depressed that Christmas is there because you're like oh great it's over now I feel a bit like that like I'm so excited to see this film. I'm almost not ready. I'm not quite ready to say I've already seen it You know like oh, yeah, I've seen it. Yeah, I've seen that no

I'm like jealous of Past me that hasn't seen it already. Oh what an amazing time Oh my god on the book topic Let's discuss. Okay girly paps guess what i'm reading right now So I completed the twisted series fucking amazing if you're not following me on tiktok I do all my in-depth book reviews there as well and and you'll probably get the tea sooner on TikTok than the pod. So that's that. I finished Twisted, the Twisted series, absolutely incredible.

My rating in the order is number one Twisted hate, unpopular opinion I know, but I just fucking love it. Like Josh is a horny, horny boy. It was insane. Like I was, ugh, okay. love it like josh is a horny horny boy it was insane like i was okay and then twisted games i'm sorry let me convince you to read twisted games okay this is one line reese larson says to her cruel to me i'm scattering on the floor like a fucking dog. I'm sorry Coming So read it. Okay twisted hate twisted games twisted love and then twisted lies unpopular again a lot of people's favorite

Actually, maybe twisted lies and then twisted love. I'm not sure they're kind of on par for me, but twisted love I feel like I'm ranking high because it was the beginning of my love with Anna Huang I'm ranking higher because it was the beginning of my love with Anna Huang, but twisted gay- uh, twisted lies I felt a little disappointed you guys. I was just a bit like Come on shag already like let's get to shagging. Do you know what I mean? Like it just their relationship took a bit too long to blossom for me. Um Great plot twist though. I will tell you when I found out Stella's stalker I was like, who the fuck, what? What the fuck? Yeah, is all I had to say was what the fuck. I had my predictions, they were all wrong. And yeah, I won't spoil anything. So now I'm onto the

Chestnut Springs series and you guys told me I would love it and you guys were not wrong. I don't think I love it more than the Twisted series, but it's close. It could be on par, at least if it's not on par, it's fucking close. And if you said to me which one should I read, Twisted or Chestnut, I'd say don't make me choose. Read both. Like you, you deserve both in your life. You all do. They're just incredible. I heard about the Chestnut Spring series and for some reason I was like no thanks. Like I wasn't sold by the whole like cowboy idea. Sounded painfully boring to me. I was like cowboys, I don't really know anything about

cowboy life and all of this. I'm into it I'm not gonna enjoy it but then I finished the Twisted series and you guys was like look just fucking read it if you like Twisted you'll love this so I was like okay fine I bought the first one yeah absolutely incredible beautiful fantastic I want to move to a farm and I want Jamie to be a cowboy and I want to ride horses and wear Wrangler jeans and cowboy boots and wear my cowboy hat and wear my... is this the correct accent? I don't know how they talk because I don't know where Chestnut Springs is. There's a couple of words in this book that make me feel like the author was British. Like there's some really weird words in this

book like they they talk about a pub yeah and they use a lot of British slang right but when I went on LC Silver Silver's Instagram, she's American. So I was well confused. So yeah, anyway, oh, they're just amazing. I'm on book three. I literally just started book three. I like literally this morning. And I'm loving them all.

The first one, 10 out of 10, no, nine out of 10. Second one, 10 out of 10. No, actually, first one, 10 out of 10, no, nine out of 10. Second one, 10 out of 10. No, actually, first one, 10 out of 10. Second one, 11 out of 10, beautiful. Cade and Willa. It may be one of my favourite books of all time if it was spicier.

I mean, it's spicy, don't get me wrong, but after reading Twisted Hate, I'm like, okay, well, guess that's what I'm into Kink unlocked. No, I'm just kidding. I don't have a hate kink Although I'm just kidding you guys But yeah, that is the update on pretty much. So yeah, that's my life Anyway, that's my update on pretty much everything

my life. Anyway that's my update on pretty much everything. Oh my god I'm so sorry I haven't addressed it. Last week my fucking episode and I swear on everything this is the truth please I would never lie to you. The fucking episode didn't go live I thought where the fuck's this fucking episode gone? Come on my laptop it's nowhere to be found. I open my audio editing app, go to recent, it's nowhere to be found. I open my edit, my audio editing app, go to recent, it's nowhere to be found. It's not coming up saying like crashed or anything, like recover, blah blah blah. Just disappeared off the face of the earth this episode from last week. I was absolutely fuming and this was about lunchtime Tuesday when I realised and I was like

Do you know what? I have debated getting a new laptop for over a year Maybe two years to be honest and I always put it off because I'm like, you know, this one works fine Do I want any monthly payment? No And then the amount of episodes I have lost Because of this laptop is a joke the amount of times I have lost because of this laptop is a joke. The amount of times episodes have been late, deleted, I've had to re-record is not even funny. And so I'm like, is this universe just telling me like, look, get a new laptop? It's time. I don't know. But we're looking into it. I might have a little browse around, see what deals I can get my hands on, but I do definitely just need to grab that laptop and just get a new one because this one is fucking me up too much now. Nothing makes me mad than like technology failing you. More mad I mean. Do you know what I mean? When technology fails...

Oh god, I'll actually kick someone's face in. I would never do that, obviously. I'll kick my laptop's fucking face in though mate. So yeah, I'm so so sorry. I did debate just re-recording it, but the thing is is it was a Q&A and I loved it as well. I feel like I went so deep into health anxiety and was sharing all about my therapy and counselling and was really like half an hour about health anxiety to a point where I was like, this is going to be so helpful and I wish that I'd heard all of this stuff a couple of years ago and I was so excited to put it out for that reason and then we spoke

about I spilled some tea like we're talking about relationships ex relationships life lessons toxic traits You know like all of these Amazing questions that you guys had and we were spilling some tea. Maybe it was universe being like that tea was a little too hot spill in some tea. Maybe it was the universe being like that tea was a little too hot. Let's not put that on the internet. Maybe it was the universe protecting me, which I always believe it's doing. So maybe that was actually the lesson. It wasn't get a new laptop. It was uh, keep your mouth shut. But yeah, I love you guys so much. I'm so sorry about that. And let's just get into today's episode. Welcome to Leah on the Line. Join me every Tuesday

as I dial your number for the ultimate unfiltered bestie catch up. Whatever it is, we will laugh together and guide each other along the way. Head to learontheline.com and follow Lear on the Line on Instagram to get involved. Love you! Oh my god you guys, no one talks about how long it is listing things on Vinted. I just did a massive wardrobe clear out and I put a tonne of my stuff on Vinted. Obviously I always donate like fucking, well like 90% to charity or women's shelters and stuff like that but I found like a lot

of really nice stuff and so many people always message me like set up a vintage, set up a vintage. So I was like on this clear out, I was like, you know what, let me see if any of this is actually worth putting on vintage and I found quite a lot that I felt like you guys would actually want. So yeah, most of it went to charity,

but there is a little bag full of stuff that I put on vintage. It wasn't little to be fair. I think there was like 27 items. And that was so long, painfully long, that I don't, I fear I'll never be able to actually find the patience to do that again. But it is kind of fun and I kind of like, now I'm excited.

Like now I wanna get like little lollies and cute stuff to put like little packages together if anyone buys anything to be fair like a lot of it's gone quite quickly so if you do actually want to get anything on my vintage this is coming out Tuesday so and I this is it's only Monday as I record this so a lot of it should still be up um so yeah let me know you guys have a little browse see if there's anything Let me know you guys have a little brow see if there's anything That you want, but okay. Let's get into the weekly debate

My question for you is based off of a dilemma today and it says Do you need to speak to or meet up with your friends regularly? Can I just pause this somebody needs to tell me is it regularly or regularly? Because do you know no one says regularly, right? Do you need to speak to or meet up with your friends regularly? Do you need to speak to or meet up with your friends regularly? I don't know. It's spelled reg-u-lar-ly, so it probably is regularly. I just- I feel like people don't say that.

Anyway, maybe it's just me. Let's get into the fucking weekly debate, Leah. Do you need to speak to slash meet up with your friends regularly to maintain the friendship, and do you feel pushed aside if you don't? Okay, so I'm such a low maintenance friendship kind of girl. I haven't heard from Zoe in weeks, months at this point, but I know for a fact

that there will come a day where we meet up and we have the most beautiful time and life is beautiful for a day while we're together and we go back to being our little home itself because we're both exactly the same and we understand each other and I just am that friend like you can be so low maintenance with me and I won't take it personally like you can not speak to me for a long time and as long as I know that the vibes are okay and as long as I know that when you when we do talk you're like oh my god hey bestie like sorry blah blah blah love you so much I'm shit you're shit everything's shit but love you as long as we can you're shit everything's shit but love you

as long as we can address that it's not personal and it's just like me and you and life and the way that we are i literally will never hold it against you and i do not care but if it's a case of like it feels flaky you feel hot and cold i feel like you've got an issue with me if it's that that's when i'm like oh fuck this like this is so stressful I can't even deal because I'm such an over thinker that if we don't just know each other and we don't just know that we're good, it's gonna be too stressful for me. I'd rather cut it. And that's just me. But then again I do have, well not do, have had friendships where we speak every day. when me and Hannah lived in London lived in London We'd speak every day basically and see each other all the time like most days or at least

Maybe like three days a week. We'd hang out with each other and I guess it friendships are just different like that Each friendships different in it. So yeah Okay, let's see what you guys are saying. Not really. I go days without replying to friends. I'd love to be closer though. See, this is the thing, and I keep seeing TikToks at the moment saying like,

oh, like when you're just doing a random activity and then realise you left your best friend on red like four days ago. So I'm like, this, it's gotta be a common thing because I keep seeing it. You know, like everyone's saying like, oh, when you realize you've left your bestie on read that is literally Would prefer I won't open your message like I'm so bad like I will never leave you on read. I'll leave you on delivered Zoe's actually left me on delivered for could be a could be two months at this point

Zoe if you're listening, just let me know you're alright, okay? Let me know you're alive, girl. Used to slash have a friend who is extremely high maintenance who basically told me I was a bad friend. I guess this is the thing, if you need from your friends constant communication and conversation and stuff like that it's not really gonna work for you being friends with someone that's more low maintenance because you you want different things from your friendship and it's it's no different to a relationship like the way that you show love and care is gonna be different and the way that you feel appreciated as a

friend is gonna be different to someone. It's like, like me, I don't care. Message me once every three months. I honestly, I'm okay with it. But there's somebody else who was like, are you fucking joking me? That's so fucked. Like, we're not friends. If we speak once every three months, we're not friends.

I don't consider you a friend. Whereas I do. I consider you my best friend. Do you know what I mean? If I'm not seeing my friends I would like to be in contact semi regularly so we don't drift. Yeah this is the thing. Obviously like you're gonna drift. It's just natural. Like you know less about each other. We don't fill each other in on everything and your friendship will change and I always say that there's different friends in your life that provide different things for each other So like to one friend

You might be my support system. I come to you when I really need some Loving some advice a listener a good listener. You're that friend and then I've got another friend where it's like I would never tell you anything personal about myself. I feel like that's not our vibe. We just go out and we get drunk together and we have such a good laugh and we, we gas each other up and we feel so like good together and we, such good vibes when we're together

and we're lol lol lol lol lols all night. And then there's the other friend where it's like, we see each other once every six months lolololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol We we meet up and we bring the babies and we do a little play day blah blah blah And then the other friend is like mom's looking after the baby. We're going out Do you know what I mean? Each friend is like we provide give and take different things from each friendship in our life And I feel like that's so normal So yeah, I get you Not at all I think as long as they are there when you need them, then that's the main thing. Absolutely.

As long as there's some kind of effort, messages, calls, gifts, and understanding. Of course. No, we all have our own busy life and just catch up when we can. Nothing changes. Not huge catch ups, but a little check in every few weeks doesn't go unnoticed. Yeah, absolutely. can, nothing changes. Not huge catch ups but a little check in every few weeks doesn't go unnoticed. Yeah absolutely, like come on, come on Zoe. A little message just to say I

hope you're okay wouldn't go amiss. Zoe's like I'm being called out on this podcast. I like a date in the diary but it doesn't matter if it's days, weeks or months. Yeah of course. Me and my friends had this conversation. We all know we're there for each other, but I also feel like we've drifted because we rarely see each other nowadays. I like to speak to my friends regularly, like once a week. I do have friendships where we speak once every two months,

but me and my best friend kind of broke up because we never spoke to each other anymore. So yes, I do prefer regular contact. Yeah, absolutely. It's a great point. So yeah, I guess a lot of you are saying like, I honestly don't need regular content as long as it's there to some significance. Do you know what I mean? Like, don't just disappear out my life, you know? And I'm with you on that. Like, absolutely. So yeah, and I do feel like as an age thing it changes with age like when I was 18 19 20 21 Whatever if you didn't speak to me for three months I'd assume we'd had a massive fallout and you hated me whereas now if if you messaged me

I probably wouldn't actually realize it's been three months Until I look at the date and I'm like, fucking hell, we haven't spoken since May. Do you know what I mean? So yeah, it's like an age thing, it's a life thing and everyone's different. I don't think there's a right or wrong in what you need or expect from your friendships. I don't think there's a right or wrong,

it's just what works for you. But yeah, all right you guys, lovely chatting with you, thank you for giving in your responses to my weekly debate and let's get into some dilemmas. Okay you guys, I'm gonna kick it straight off with this one. Get comfy, let's go. Should I split up with my fiancé? Wow. Should I split up with's opinion and advice. Leah Gurley, please help me. I love your podcast and I need another girl's opinion and advice. I got you girl, let's do this.

Me and my fiance got engaged this year and I've booked our wedding for 2025. We are so excited. However, there has been one major issue since becoming engaged and I'm not sure if it's a deal breaker. Buckle up, it's a long one. Buckle up, girlies. Me and my fiance live together and one night when I got home he wasn't here and should have been as

he finished work six hours prior. I was panicking and rang my mum and sister thinking he'd had an accident or something serious. Oh my god, my brain would be gone mate. Oh my god. He had been active and his phone was going straight to voicemail, so I knew he had a spare phone from when he upgraded. Oh god. And I know his phone password, so I just wanted to see if he had last minute plans to meet up with friends or stay behind at work etc. We always let each other know where the other one is, not psycho just a trusting thing to do right? yeah, I Went on to his messages and nothing I went on to his snapchat

And there was I'm sorry I'm not marrying anyone with snapchat If you get down on one knee you're gonna have to delete that fucking do you know what don't delete the app delete your account I'm not marrying someone with snapchat I can, do you know what, don't delete the app, delete your account. I'm not marrying someone with Snapchat. Seriously, call me judgmental, call me judgmental all you want. Call me controlling.

It's just, that is something I'm not willing to budge on. Snapchat is the devil, I hate it. I went into his messages and nothing. I went onto his Snapchat and there was messages with his friend who was a female. I have no problem with this by the way. The messages were banter like her asking him to go to the pub for a drink and him saying no that he wants to spend time with me etc. normal chit chat. Delicious. Then I see her say that she has split with her boyfriend and needs

a fuck buddy. Get the fuck away from me. I broke up with my boyfriend and I need a fuck buddy, get the fuck away from me. I broke up with my boyfriend, I need a fuck buddy. And you're messaging my boyfriend that, why? And why are you messaging my boyfriend that? So, so inappropriate. Oh, his response. Are you ready? His response.

I'll be your fuck buddy. Go on then go on then My rage I drove straight around to her house to have it out. Wow, you're so brave. Oh my God. And she swore it was harmless banter with no meaning behind and swore in her kid's life that got to be a freak to do that and it's not true. I don't care if it was a joke. Well, I do care, but that's another problem.

Even if you're joking, I still have an issue with that. Like, don't make them jokes to my boyfriend. But also, to be honest, I'm more pissed off at my boyfriend than her. Like, whatever. Do you know what I mean? Girls can just be like that. Just like guys can. But you are my fiance. I'm pissed at you, babe. Alright, ummm. We met up. Wait, hold on. Me and him split up for a week and didn't see each other. We met up and spoke about everything and he swore in my life,

which he has never done before because he doesn't like it, and offered to do a lie detector test. LOL. Guys, I'm gonna tell you something, okay? Dickhead, boys, they love that one. Hook me up to a lie detector test. Okay, so I'm gonna tell you something okay dickhead boys they love that one hook me up to a lie detector

you're gonna say that because I'm not gonna hook you up to a fucking lie detector mate that's literally what they do guys they say hook me up hook me up to a lie detector you know I can't you know I don't have access to a lie detector that's why you're literally using that oh You must be telling the truth then because you're willing to do something that I physically do not have access to I hate it when people say that He swore he has never cheated and never would he said why would he I'm sorry saying to your friend saying to anyone That is not me. I'll be your fuck buddy. You've cheated on me. That is cheating. Are you insane? Are you insane?

It's cheating right Um, he said why would he ask me to marry him if he was interested in someone else guys, this is all classic Why would I ask you to marry me? Oh, it's like it's like when people go Why would I leave my phone if I was cheap? Why would I leave? Why would I do this if I was because people do that shit? right We sorted everything out there and then and decided to move forward Only problem is I had spoken to my protective sister and mum about this and told them everything

Yes over like it's over for him. Do you know what I mean? They originally wanted to chat about this with him, but have since dropped it as we all say stupid shit sometimes and they believe it was an honest mistake. Oh, okay, fair enough. Problem is, and what I need your help with, is my sister's husband and my fiance are good friends. Hold on, my sister's husband and my fiance. Okay so you and your sister's men right? They're

good friends. My boyfriend has asked him to be best man at our wedding. Problem is when this happened my sister's husband blocked my fiance on social media and wanted nothing to do with him. Oh. Are we all following? So it's like my sister's boyfriend blocking Jamie when Jamie said, you want to be the best man? And my sister's boyfriend's like, fuck that, blocked him. When we, we, we thought you guys were cool.

Okay. My gut right now tells me he knows something that's my gut he knows something as a man that he cannot look past that's my gut because it's unusual for a man to hold a grudge over something that doesn't affect him you know okay time has passed and my sister's husband my sister's husband reached out to my fiance asking to meet up and have a chat about what he's done. My fiance doesn't want to go over negative shit that has been resolved and is hurt by his best

man's actions of not hearing him out before blocking him with no contact. I think he knows, I think your sister's husband knows something and he's saying like, well I'll meet up with him and have a chat with him, right? And your fiance's like, nah, nah, fuck that, fuck that. It's almost like he has this feeling that he's gonna meet up with him and he's gonna go, mate, you need to fucking tell her what I know you did.

You need to tell her. And he doesn't have big enough balls to go to this meetup and confront whatever it is that he knows. I'm literally making this all up. I'm totally guessing, right? But this is just some, just my psychic brain is telling me

your sister's boyfriend knows that he did something, whether it's like cheating, like solidly slept with this girl, whatever. He knows somehow and he cannot sleep at night being the best man at this guy's wedding knowing a secret that no one else knows okay and he's like right you want me to be the best man at your wedding let's have a fuck it let's have it out mate and he wants to meet up with your boyfriend your fiance so he can say that I know what you

Did and I won't be the best man at your wedding until you come clean But your fiance is like fuck that he's gonna sit he's gonna sit there and hold me accountable for what I know He knows I've done is this making any sense. It's making perfect sense in my brain. I hope I hope it's um translating well And your boyfriend's like fuck that so he's avoiding him now because he's like shit And maybe he made him the best man to keep him on his side Maybe he was like oh if I ask him to be the best man at my wedding like he's not gonna drop me in for The more he knows I did you know

My future husband has to have a relationship with my family But because he hasn't responded everything is blown up again and brought to the surface. Please help me By the way when I could find him he was at the pub. Oh my god Yeah, of course where the fuck was he for six hours? He was at the pub with his work friends and his phone had died his work friend confirmed from a very sad girly Okay, I don't trust this guy I love you, and I'm so sorry that you're sad and I understand the pure anxiety and the questions and all this in the air right now. I don't trust that he was at the pub with his workmates. I don't trust that his phone had died because your mates will say anything. Let me tell

you now, especially blokes, your- their friends will have their back. You could call any of your boyfriend's friends now and say is Steve at yours now? Because he didn't come home last night. Is he at yours? He told me he's at yours. And he'd go, yeah he's at mine, he's at mine. When actually he's fucking right next to you and it was just a test and he failed. They would all have their boys back. That's the truth, right? So I don't fucking believe anyone's friends when they say, oh no seriously we're just at the pub, his phone genuinely died Of course you're gonna say that because he's fucking arse you do you prick right?

However could be true. He could genuinely have been at the pub Could you not have borrowed a friend's phone? Could you know like this is all it's hard to trust these little things now about where you were that day When you've been snapchatting your friend behind my back telling me you'll be a fuck buddy. Okay? Do you know what I mean? The trust is broken and therefore now I don't even believe anything that you're telling me about your boyfriend. So I think this situation with your sister's husband is a bit bizarre. I don't think it's as simple as like, because this is the thing right, say Jamie's brother, wait what is this? Jamie's brother's girlfriend cheated on him? Yeah.

I'm not gonna be all fuck, I'm not gonna be like nah fuck that like lalala, unless I'm extremely passionate about this, unless I know something. Do you know what I mean? And I feel like it's none of his business to care this much unless he knows something and it's about him and his conscience and you know keeping something from his wife aka your sister. I don't know. I'm concerned. I'm just a little bit concerned. And if I was you I'd be inclined to have a chat with my sister's husband and say like, do you know something? Because if you do, just tell me what it is. Don't worry about doing the

right thing, just tell me what it is. Please. I deserve it. And you know maybe he doesn't and I could have just made this whole fucking thing up in my head which is highly likely because it's me but I would just be careful with this guy and don't just because he didn't say like oh you know I would never cheat on you I would I didn't I never cheat on you just because he said all this doesn't mean that sending your fucking friend a text saying that I would be your fuck buddy is okay Whether it was just a text or you actually genuinely have had sex with her you still made a massive fucking mistake something that I don't think should be very easily forgiven and

If you show somebody that you will easily forgive a behavior like this You're showing them your boundaries on where they should be and they're gonna fucking take advantage of you and your trust so be careful with a guy like that is all I want to say and I love you and you deserve to feel like you can trust somebody and that you're good enough because you are and don't let this guy's behaviour make you feel like you're not good enough. Also I'm being inclined be inclined to say, if you still want to marry me, right? You fucked up. You've kind of lost your chances of having a friendship with this girl because you've

overstepped. You've disrespected me. You've embarrassed me. So has she, by the way. And you should have had my back there. And her saying, I need a fuck buddy to you completely disrespectful to me, you replying saying I'll be your fuck buddy is cheating to me. That is another world of disrespect compared to

her right? You in my eyes, you've cheated on me doing that and you want me to still be okay with you two being friends? Nah, it's not gonna happen You need to fucking you got some serious groveling to do you've got my trust back now I don't you've embarrassed me disrespecting me and broken my trust and you you want to just be like, oh babe I would never cheat on you get fucked. Yeah, that's the mentality Love you. Okay next one Hello, beautiful girl. I hope you're doing well and I'm so glad you're back. Oh, I love you. Okay, next one. Hello, beautiful girl. I hope you're doing well and I'm so glad you're back. Oh, I love you.

I have a dilemma based on a newfound friendship and I need to know am I being a bitch or am I valid? My best friend, mum and boyfriend tell me that they see it too, but I think I just need an outsider's point of view. Okay, I'm here. In my early 20s, oh sorry, I'm in my early 20s, live at home, in a long-term relationship and full-time working girly and I've recently grown closer with a wonderful girl who I met through a couple work a couple of weeks ago, years ago,

sorry fuck. We never really had much of a friendship back then, however in recent months we have we have had quite a whirlwind friendship going on day trips, nights out and in, phone calls, voice notes, etc. I've always appreciated my friendships and nourished them dearly through frequent check-ins and friend dates, etc. However, I don't typically see my friends much anymore due to all of us working and life-ing and... oh wait, sorry, but always check in frequently and plan the odd dinner and drinks or spontaneous evening catch up at the local pub etc. I will be buying my first house with my boyfriend next year, therefore my priority outside of

my weekend plans and evenings in the gym etc. is saving for that. I don't want to sound like that girl but I genuinely love spending weekends with my boyfriend, going to the gym, reading my books and then chill in the week after work. Would the monthly slash bi-weekly catch up with a friend? My sister is my best friend so I spend a lot of time doing activities with her as well. So your cup is extremely full, like you are fulfilled in all if not most areas of your life right. Um where did I get to? I don't love going out anymore due to anxiety and CBA alcohol makes me sick, me, especially if I'm not comfortable in my company. Don't get me wrong I love a bar and a dance but drinking Friday Saturday staying out until 3 is no longer for me but I

absolutely love it for those who it is. to my friend. Let's call her Amy. Amy's a little older, longtime single, recently moved to a new city and main priority Is going out. So you are on different pages, different stages of life organizing plans Weekendly and has always invited me to her city, which is a three-hour train away every month I love her and I'm so grateful for her friendship. However, 24 seven contact is seriously not for me. I do not need to talk to my friends every day to know that they're there.

She has other friends, by the way, who live in her city, who she sees and tells me who she seems and tells me she is extremely close to. So she is not short on friendships. OK. She is still however quite, what's the word I'm looking for here? High maintenance, that's the word. So it's not like she's lonely, et cetera. Of course I wouldn't let that happen if that was the case.

I'm always up to listen and be there for my girls, but I receive approximately 10 plus messages a day from Amy on all three platforms, text, Instagram, TikTok. It's a lot. We both work full time too may I add. I've noticed she barely asks about me, has light hearted chats as every convo is about her, fooling out with her friends, family, the fact her rent is expensive and how I need to visit soon. I've visited six times in the year not once as she come to my hometown Okay

Well when I politely respond a few hours later or a day or two later, she asks why I haven't replied sooner Sorry, don't do that When I can't commit to a plan months in advance due to saving up and I typically have a lot booked of my boyfriend or Other friends here in there whilst also not knowing what I'm a plan months in advance due to saving up and I typically have a lot booked with my boyfriend or other friends here and there whilst also not knowing what I'm doing 10 months in advance, she gets the ump. We've had our birthday plan since March for August and every week since March, she's a Leo babe,

it's making sense, she's a Leo. She messaged me to remind me and in every conversation since June she will mention her birthday or says can't wait to see you in X amount of days every day So you're feeling a little bit smothered, okay, I Know birthdays are exciting. She's given Leo her birthdays in August. She could be an August Leo Sorry, but we love apart from to be honest as I get older kind of depressing But we Leo's we love our birthday. Okay. It's a day that is officially all about us. Let us have it. Okay

I know but those excited and I'm genuinely grateful for the friendship But it just feels very full on when it was my birthday She wasn't able to come as she wasn't planning on coming home that month. Okay, that's a bit shit isn't it? Which I get but when she's so full-on about her celebrations and really just make me raise an eyebrow Whenever I post a story or photo in a one minute is being responded to when I'm not on my phone on weekends that much I get 25 minute voice notes. I That is Unheard of

25 minutes this guy loves the sound of her own voice. I like the sound of my voice, but that's insane 20 I feel guilty the most the longest voice not I think I've ever sent was when I was going through a breakup Which I think makes it more validated and it was to Jess and it was about seven and a half minutes long That was insane. That was like, oh my god. I was talking I'm so sorry about you know, we got to talk about this I don't know why we don't just call each other. It's been a spot 25 minutes Wow It's about 25 minutes. Wow. Okay, I got a 25 minute voice note from Amy telling me

how she feels isolated and lonely and whatever issue else there is that day. Not once am I asked if I'm okay, what my plans are or nothing. Another thing worth adding is when plans are suggested, it's always for me to come to Amy and never the offer of Amy coming to me. I find myself being overstimulated from her without even seeing her and I feel drained quite

frequently after we've had a conversation. I do appreciate her, we do get on, but I feel like our friendship styles are so different and starting to make me feel a bit put off and irritated more so than anything else. I don't want to be mean and I have absolutely no idea how I could distance myself or say anything to try and change the relationship. We have a lot in common and she really is my type of girl if that makes sense. I understand we may be in different stages of life at the moment but that doesn't usually affect me too much. Do you have any suggestions because I am at a loss? I've attached photos as I know you like them. Omg gorgeous. I'm sorry this is so long I just honestly feel wiped out thank you for everything honey. Oh love

you can I just say you're both absolutely stunning. Like some of the most gorgeous girls I think in the world to be honest. Okay outfits are slay. Gorgeous. Alright so it's a difficult one because like is it easier just to say do you know what fuck that like this friendship is fucking draining 25 minutes is absolutely insane say, do you know what, fuck that, like this friendship's fucking draining, 25 minutes is absolutely insane, let me breathe, you know? Or, is it something you can work through and bring this friendship to a level that you are more comfortable with? I think there is a way. Um, sometimes a little honesty is key. And it could always, you know, it wouldn't go amiss just to say like next time she pops up saying like, oh come and see me

Maybe say it in a jokey way like how about you come and see me for once lazy bitch, you know Making me do all the traveling to you little miss princess How about you come and see me for once? Do you know what I mean? Like it doesn't have to be like hey, babe Look, I've been thinking and you know, like I think we all need to get better at saying how we feel about it being mean or being serious do you know what I mean so it's a really good thing to to be able to do is like rather than sit with your feelings and feel consumed by negative emotions release in a normal healthy communicative communicative communicative is that word communicative way communicative communicative communic, communicative? Is that a word? Communicative way.

Communicative, communicative, communicative, communicative. Try and say that loads. Communicative, communicative, communicative, communicative. Unique New York, New York, unique, unique, New York, unique, unique, New York, unique, New York, unique, unique, New York, New York, unique, unique, New York, New York, unique, oh, I slayed that. Red lorry, yellow lorry, red lorry, yellow lorry, red lorry, yellow lorry, red lorry, oh I slayed that. Red Lori, yellow Lori, red Lori, yellow Lori,

red Lori, yellow Lori, red Lori, yellow Lori, red Lori, yellow Lori, red Lori, yellow Lori. I'm actually sick of that. Anyway, what the actual fuck am I talking about? Yeah, I think there should be a way that we can communicate with people without it being like a, well I'll just go fuck myself then. And if she responds like that,

honestly it's a reflection of her her you should be able to say like By the way, I'm we're very different like you use your big texter I'm not really a texter but but don't take that personally. It's not you I'm like that with everyone so like if I don't reply seriously, don't worry Like I'll reply whenever I'm mentally in the right headspace to reply. It's nothing to do with you I just get really overstimulated and Hopefully like she'll be like, oh, okay and I won't take it so personally and then if she does again Just be like babes. We've spoke we've spoke about this. It's not you. I'm just over simulated

Please help me you're gonna have to get used to that because I can't do this 24-7 text and it's not for me You know And hopefully we can get to a point where we can just communicate really maturely and like adults and just say let look You can come to me. I'm not gonna reply to you straight away because I've got a fucking life mate Do you know what I mean though? Like I just feel like Sometimes we run from people because we don't know how to communicate with them and we're scared of we're scared of communicating with them and we're Like oh fuck that she's gonna blow her lid if I say that so you distance yourself And it's a shame because you shouldn't have to and you know she's feeling lonely and stuff

And I wonder why everyone else fucking around a mile Jakin that is so mean love her. She sounds so sweet like Nothing bad about her at all. She's not ever been a bad friend to you, she's been sweet and lovely, and she loves you, she adores you. So let's not hurt our feelings, let's just communicate as maturely and neutrally as possible

and let's just hope we get the best case scenario. And please, please send us an update on this one I can't imagine how she's gonna handle it also can we maybe do this after her birthday all right babes love you good luck with that okay guys we are running into this episode so I am actually gonna head to the outro and you guys are gonna stay please please stay let's let's do the outro together because how many of you click off for the outro just out of curiosity please don't I love you so much let's wrap up

the episode okay you guys thank you so much for being here for this entire episode if you made it to the end, honestly, I love you and appreciate you so much. Guys, I'm scared. I have this thing of like the evil eye. Like I hate sharing exciting news or like fun things that I'm going to before they happen because this is gonna come out before the premiere.

And I get so anxious because I'm like, the evil eye is so real. And like there's definitely people that listen to my podcast that are low key haters. And I'm so scared because I'm like, the evil eye is so real and like there's definitely people that listen to my podcast that are low key haters and I'm so scared of these people. The people that like pay close attention to you that hate you scare me. Literally so scary. But universe, please protect me in this experience. Thank you for these blessings in my life. Please protect all of my listeners and we're so grateful for everything. Everything that we have, everything that we are attracting and is yet to come. Every lesson we have learned in life, we are so grateful and we are so lucky. Thank you.

But yeah, the evil eye is so real that I'm just so scared like but it's gonna be fine I need to get through this Paranoia in my mind that if I share good news, it will get taken away from me. That's not true. Okay But yeah, I hope you guys all have an amazing week this week. Please think of me on Thursday when I'm rattling in nerves But I can't wait to talk to you guys next week because we would have all seen the ends of us movie And if you haven't booked your tickets You need to book them babe because my cinema is always empty and even my local cinema tiny tiny little local cinema is nearly full For the Friday show in so I'm watching it in the late evening on Friday, but obviously I'll be watched at the premiere as well

So I'm so excited you guys. I love you guys, I hope you all have an amazing week. I can't wait to debrief about this film. Go and watch it, book your tickets and yeah have an amazing week guys. I'll speak to you on Tuesday for a brand new episode. I love you, bye! you