Leah on the Line - 16: My boyfriend has a bad lying habit! feat. MADDIE GRACE JEPSON

Episode Date: May 2, 2022

Hellooooo! Omg can you believe it! Maddie joined us on this week's episode to give us her words of wisdom and how fun is she! I had such a laugh filming this episode and I'm so excited for you guys to give it a listen. Thank you so much for all the love and support on the podcast! As always, send in your thoughts/dilemmas to [e-mail]. Love you! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

hello hey everyone welcome back to another episode of leah on the line i have a very exciting guest for you today okay just make one noise oh my god you know what's so embarrassing right every time i'm on tiktok live people and in my general tiktoks people comment saying stop trying to be like maddie and i'm like no they don't say that do they they do but you know what it is do you know what it is it's quite embarrassing but you know like when you hang out with your like best friends a lot yeah and you like adopt their personality yes i've done that with you and this is the first time you've been there but do you know what i wonder how many people are walking the world right now again hello oh my god all thanks to you i really i know guys but this is so exciting i

literally love that side of it though yeah well how long have you been talking like this oh god you know what i can't even think because like genuinely it's like something that just me my friends used to do all the time. Do your friends do it? Yeah, we used to do it for so long. So they're like, Maddie, you're getting all the clout for our thing. No, I'm actually going to put it out there. These are all original, my own jokes.

So people can try and claim them as their own. But they're mine. But it was. I am the OG. Sorry. Okay, I love it. About my friends. No, I'm joking.

No, it was always just something that we always did. Like, always just weird voices. Like, we can't talk in our normal voice to each other. Do you know what's so funny? That video. I don't know no it was always just something that we always did like always just weird voices like we can't talk in our normal voice to each other do you know what's so funny that video i don't know who it was maybe do you have a sister was it your sister on christmas yeah yeah oh no my older sister yeah and you're just like that oh yeah i know but that's also good like i just love it because it's just me i've just adopted your personality it's it's so i love it like people were like they think i'm really trying to be you and I'm like no I have just become like you but then do you know what when your video started blowing up my friends used to send me

your videos and be like this girl is you I was like I was like I know I'm already feeling your energy I'm already feeling your energy as soon as I came through the door I was like this girl this girl no but you just know like you know like this is what I love it's so good to know that so many other people are just like you that's why do you know what I do when you upload right god I'm really offloading my love to you but it's true right when when I'm on my for you page and I see one Manny Gray Simpson video I'm like oh fuck she's been active before I before the video starts I'm like whoa I need to click on the profile go to the first one that's new and watch them all because i don't want to miss them you don't miss any of them no i'm like whoa whoa whoa that's a you're a true fan i wish there was notifications for

tiktok uploads because that's so true no that's actually so true okay tiktok if you're listening don't know why you would pick tiktok no you honestly that is actually so true they need to and you know what also tiktok needs to do is allow you to edit your caption after you've posted. So true, but then, oh, would it be dangerous because you could like be liking somebody's videos and the captions change and the whole video's changed and you've liked something that you don't like anymore. That's so true.

You could change your captions like this. If I've actually spelt it wrong, that's what I was saying. If I've done a typo, that's what annoys me. I know I should, but I'm always just like and then just like post right now what makes you just go I do you just go I've got an amazing idea for a video it would just come to me you'll just be sat on the sofa I'm gonna be the trained person platform yeah but that's usually because I've like seen it in the day or I've seen it like out and about yeah I'm honestly I'm such

an observer like in life all my friends always say like how have you like picked that that up about me oh it's all true though yeah i just i always just like love to watch things happening in real life and be like that is such a funny situation to me that i have to right and i have to over dramatize everything yeah like it has to be dramatic it's true otherwise mine's the the west country accent i oh yeah that my love has really taken shape these days i know my love yeah it's true but it's like that's what i don't know i'm not like taking the mick out of the west country i love the west country well i'm from the west country your family from the west yeah my mum's side of the family we're allowed to yeah to do that and i just think it makes i can't be

my own like voice like to get into the character i have to be doing something to make me like really separate from me yeah because when i hear your real voice i'm like whoa what's she doing traitor yeah yeah like yeah yeah when you look really nice on tiktok and you've got like all your glands and i'm like what is she doing i know people understand yesterday i was out and about and i this girl like noticed me she's like that oh you're actually so oh my god i was just gonna say you get those comments when i see people comment that like oh my god you actually look really nice i'm like that's rude kind of rude honey you actually no no i understand like because like most of the time i am just posting whatever like i'm not trying to look good yeah that's why i love

it yeah because the confidence just it gl glows. Because I could never. I'm way too insecure. You could never. I could never. But then I do upload TikToks where I look like a bag of poo. But also people respond to that. Like people never, that's what I love about TikTok. It'd be different if it was like Instagram.

I do feel like Instagram is such a different vibe in that sense. So true. As soon as you post something that you're not looking your best, like unfollow. Yeah. Like people just unfollow, unfollow. Because they're just like ew ugly ugly but like are we allowed to swear on this oh oh my god yeah sorry i was like just have to check because i was about to say like ugly bitch ugly bitch yeah they're literally so like crazy whereas on tiktok they're almost like

eating it up that yes she's ugly she's ugly me too me too like you know everyone just feels like yeah it's so much more chill like so true you can just show yourself to be whoever you want to be but i think the reason you can go on looking like fresh face just woke up is because you have flawless skin and it makes me sick oh when you do the back camera with the flash i'm like just go away with that skin it's so nice oh i am very lucky with my skin though i will say i've got this like skin routine but i'll just say i've seen it i'm really i am lucky with the skin you are i've never had acne or anything so i do have to put a disclaimer right now i know but do you know what people always say like what's your skin

routine i feel like you know can't create false expectations like i've never had i've never had it like me yeah just born with it honey you can't buy this babe all right let's get into the weekly debate enough about you love it okay the weekly debate this week is do you tell your friend you don't like their hair or makeup if they ask yes thoughts you do yeah right so i've just got ready we're about to leave to go on a night out and i'm like does my makeup look right and if it looked crazy outside if it looked can i say the cab's waiting we need to go and sort that out oh i would oh what a good friend yeah because i would want someone to say to me i'd go you look great babe get in the fucking cab no yeah would you really um i okay if it's fixable like if it's like oh just blend that quick or like maybe change the lip color i'd be like quick

quick quick but if it was like oh my god this is gonna cause a drama depends on the friend you know those friends that might have a meltdown like i would like oh my god i'm not going out i'm like you look great babe because also at the same time i think if you feel like you look amazing if the makeup's like bad like it needs blending or something then i would tell you but if you're like you've done a big crazy big green blue purple oh yeah that's so different i like it yeah i'll be like do you like it and if they say i'd like love it they're so true that is so different like if in that instance if someone if i've got a friend who's got a really different style to me different yeah true like that i wouldn't personally go but i'm i'm never gonna say i don't like what you wear like because that's their vibe and they look great

in that there's like just a personal preference but if it was like a friend that's my vibe yeah like see like me and you like if we were going to night out and then you you're like i don't know outfit was looking a bit crazy and you were like what do you think about my outfit that i might say blue adidas tracksuit with a pair of louis vuitton heels i might say let's change the tracksuit bottoms for maybe a nice skirt so a tracksuit hoodie and a skirt i'd say see that whole thing i would have to like And also, I would really want someone to say to me. Yeah, I would. Like, even in an instance where it's like, if a top, like, because I'm all for cleavage, like, get the cleavage out.

But if I'm with a friend who I'm like, there's going to be a nip slip situation here, but I'm going to tell them, I'm going to say, right, what can we do to just help this situation? So, you know, but they might not care. Yeah, because I'm the kind of friend that's like, just let me know if you see a nip and i'll put it away oh you know well in that in that case then fine i just always like to help my friends i never want them to like come out away from an hour and be like why did no one tell me yeah like nobody told me i had a big foundation exactly exactly if it was like there's a problem with the makeup or like there was a lighting issue when you were getting ready i'm letting you know but if you're like do you like my outfit and they love it i'd be like yeah yeah oh my god

they love it and it actually just is like like great for them yeah you look amazing let's go and to be fair when has there ever been a situation where like a friend on the night will say do you like like come on we're all sending photos do you like my outfit what are you wearing yeah that is like so i actually don't think i've ever come across a situation where I've had to do that because we've all been so prepared of like, we've all sent the outfits into the group chat. Okay, what if, what about in the situation when you're getting dressed together, like you're choosing the outfit and she's like, oh, I quite like this, but you just genuinely don't.

Are you like, okay. Or I didn't think maybe it was the best option, I would say. You'd go, mm, I like the dress. I'd say, oh, I think I like that one better. I'm telling you i'm telling you right now always always always but then it's so awkward when they're like well i'm wearing this and then you're like okay i say yeah i say okay honestly if whatever you feel most comfortable in but i'm telling you you look like shit i'm just my opinion was that last one but you still look great you look 10 out of 10 in the dress but i'm just a dress girl and if you like jeans go for the jeans babe yeah i'm just a dress girl, and if you like jeans, go for the jeans, babe.

Yeah, I'm not a dress girl. You just have to feel, I always just say, you have to feel comfortable, whatever you feel most comfortable in. Then when someone says that to me, I'm like, well, I look like shit. Like it's not gonna do anything. Like as long as you feel good.

It's like, oh no. No, I feel like I'm such a bad friend right now. No, your approach is the best. Mine's just like, yeah, you look great, babe. Let's go. I'm just selfish. I just take your word. I'm just like, all right.

Well, don't I look great? It's so subjective, though, isn't it? Yeah, it is. Okay, let's read some of their responses. So now we know that Maddie's a good friend and I'm a terrible friend. Let's see if you guys are good friends. Okay. Yes, of course.

Obviously in a nice way, like your hair would look better if. Oh, but that's like, I guess in the question was, if I asked, would you tell me? You need to be prepared that the answer might be. True. We could improve some bits going,

you know, we can improve the hair we can improve that's a sensitive topic for me if i've decided i'm having my hair down and straight and somebody's like i think you should go for a slick pony i'll be like oh god but like it looks so nice down and straight so like anyone who says that but also how do you know if someone's just being fake yeah like you have those friends that want to look better than you yeah imagine don't you have you ever had those friends in school maybe in like secondary school don't bring it up i start crying what was your life like in school oh i hated school same i hated school i got really badly bullied same oh was it by your friends not by my girlfriends i actually had my friends oh but i know my sister was really badly

bullied by like some girls but i did they believe was really badly bullied by like some girls but i was bullied by i was bullied by a boy well yeah and i think at the time which i shouldn't be made to feel bad for i still i still have to convince myself like it's fine i was really emotional like oh as a 12 year old like i used to cry a lot i still cry now i'm really emotional person but this one boy was just relentless about calling me like an attention seeker and but he got where is he now hey who where are you who the fuck knows sorry i don't go on it like he's doing fuck all yeah but he ruined my like i've honestly but it's it's like like honestly bullying and things i feel like

it's just brushed off but like you live with it. Makes me sick. Yeah. Makes me sick. But I was the same. Everyone used to tell me, even my own, like, siblings, like, you're so sensitive. Mm. No.

And then that's it, isn't it? Yeah. You feel like you can never be emotional, and then that's not going to serve anything. Still to this day, I'm, like, 24 years old, and I'm like, don't cry, because everyone else can't be sensitive. Oh, no. But now, now I'm like,

you didn't get to decide if what you just said can upset me or not yeah i'll decide that and it has several days i think crying is so good as soon as i have a cry for so much better so i didn't give a fucking fuck what you think about me okay what's the same no i'm digging ben yeah say the full name like no i wonder where he is now what is he doing he cares no who cares i don't care my bully was my best friend oh no that is all that is awful that just must have been jealousy anyway we've just gone off sorry

right um it's personal preference at the end of the day we should be hyping our girls up yeah yeah like yeah i prefer your hair up but you prefer it down so what does it matter what i think yeah exactly who cares that is that is the sense i would take yeah but then again the whole question is if i'm asking i want to know your opinion so god we could just go back and forth all day about this right so the uh roundup of that is, depends on the friend, depends if they ask, depends if we've got time.

Depends on every situation. Yeah. It's like, basically, it just depends. So basically, helpless. Yes.

Thank you. Right. Okay. Let's move on to some dilemmas. The first one I'm going to go with is pretty fitting for you. Okay. It's, okay,

you read it actually, because of what it says. I feel like that's, that's all you. Right, right from the beginning. Okay names obviously oh yeah here's here's this is from chelsea smith yeah here you go this is literally quoting this guy holy cooos i'm literally obsessed with both of you icons oh my god so so i started tiktok a couple months ago and i've done quite a few videos now but i'm struggling to build my bring my personality onto my page like the only thing i can think of is doing more videos of me talking because i always use sounds i feel like you guys can give

me the best advice eventually i want to start youtube but want to do tiktok a bit more first as i'm really really enjoying it okay what's your advice you're the tiktoker i think it's really hard to like take that first step in just allowing yourself to be yourself in front of a camera because it is the way it is such a weird experience like it's a weird thing to do it probably comes more natural to us because the theater side exactly and i do feel like yes that that definitely come hand in hand but also i used to find it really weird at the beginning because it was like you're talking to no one yeah do you know i mean and then when when i started to get an audience i was like well i'm actually talking to people now so it actually became easier for me the bit the bigger my profile when did you start so well i was making like most random

videos sort of like in the lockdown you know just for fun and then it was like january january last year i had like one really vibe like was it we built this no that was one well yes that was like that was maybe like this time last year like march last year oh maybe i did see it what was the most the most well my first ever viral one was me swinging my arm around i don't know you saw that one don't ever fucking yeah don't message me again that's me oh my god i've been quoting that for so long well that's not my voice i used the sound yeah it was a trend and i'd seen it quite early on and then yeah and so i like i was like because i've got really high how often i do that i often do that yeah often honestly so it was that one

but that was like a fluke that's so funny that was like a fluke like that was like oh my god like 14 million views yeah oh my god i've made it i was trying my arm i was so embarrassed i was and then but then from there like i gained quite a few followers just from like one video I was traumatized. I was so embarrassed. I was. And then, but then from there, like I gained quite a few followers just from like one video. Then I just kept going with it really. But yeah, like the,

we built this city was probably like the first of the singing ones that sort of like got me my like little, I guess, my brand of that sort of thing. Yeah,

because your username used to be Mad Grace. Mad Grace Shep. Everyone thought you was called Grace. Everyone's coming to me like, Mad Grace. you was called grace i'm mad i'm mad grace and i thought your name was great i know everyone that was great and you made that video and was like by the way guys my name is maddie and i was like yeah whoa i know i had to change the name but my so my sorry just talking about myself again i can't believe it um but is it it's really i can understand why it's

such it's like feels weird in the beginning but i just think just go for it break try and just break through the barrier and like vlog your days i always think that's a really fun one to do so like if you can like vlog your day and then do like a little voiceover at the end i always think that's a really good way to like break the barrier of like people hearing your voice and like doing it but you'll feel more comfortable the more you do it i guess i was like really not very useful to say like advice but do you know what i did because when i started doing tiktoks i was just like using sounds like just do what everyone else is doing yeah exactly like i was just doing what everyone was doing but i was like i'm not a dancer like

i'm shit at dancing like Like, even TikTok dancing. I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa. So I was just, like, using sounds, like what you said that you're doing. But then I started to just, like, film myself getting ready. And then I was like, I wasn't even going to post them. And then one of them, I was like, oh, that's quite cute. Like, I like the vlog vibes. Like, it feels like a FaceTime.

So I was like, I'm just going to post it. And then what I noticed was the videos before, like, might get like the odd viral video but because it's just you using a sound whereas yours is different because you're doing your thing but I wasn't doing anything unique so I wasn't getting followers I was just getting views so I was like okay like yeah I'll just keep getting viral videos and I'm just on like 10k followers and then when I started talking like the videos wouldn't get as many views but I'd get more followers so I was like oh like people only follow you when they actually know your personality they're engaged yeah they feel like they know you so I feel like it would be a good thing for your growth as well to just be like you know what I'm just gonna make a fucking video and talk to the camera and even if it gets 100 views then just keep doing them yeah 100% just keep doing it

one of them will just go yeah exactly so true that's the thing of tiktok it takes one video exactly so you know it is and that's what i love about it is is it's accessible to everybody like everyone has the opportunity to go viral so you just never know i think don't be afraid of it just be yourself and someone will always be able to relate to you yeah always like always and don't don't put pressure on it don't put pressure on it hun yeah like don't just be like oh my god like how do i get my personality across just like just set your camera up while you're doing your makeup or like taking your makeup off doing your skincare and just chat and then you might go oh just got a good video i didn't realize i was talking for a whole minute exactly and then people might go oh my god i really like this girl's vibe

she's really cozy and really cute follow follow her i love her she's so cute yeah that's what i do yeah okay next dilemma um let's go boyfriend okay okay hi leah and maddie my boyfriend has a really bad lying habit not spiteful lies i'm talking more like storytelling and ads on extra bits this is so funny to me okay um he's never lied about anything to upset me personally but i've witnessed him lying to other people etc and it makes me paranoid that he must be lying to me too it just makes it hard to trust with certain things i've told him about this and he says he knows it's a really bad habit so he's aware he does it he just said he would stop but things oh but since then i've noticed he still lies about things i think it's a habit he's stuck in

sometimes it makes me question what he says etc it's hard not trusting your partner when i know he wouldn't mean to hurt me by it it's just naturally upsetting as it makes me overthink what could he be lying about to me oh god weird little habit it's like he's addicted to lying just kidding i'm sorry i don't mean to laugh about the situation but it's just because it's pointless that's why it's funny i know anything like that makes like because i like i'm dramatic in terms of like i will add things into a story to be dramatic but not but i will say probably like yeah that didn't actually happen yeah but that's actually really quite interesting bizarre i'm intrigued about that whole situation yeah like i'm wondering what kind of add-ons exactly like what are the extents of

the like the lies i know i know she's saying they're just like little add-ons or um but i can i can see that i'd be i'd be thinking like what are you just making things up like yeah if he was like oh me and um ella were out for dinner the other day and we just saw jolly death across the table yeah and you'd be looking and thinking no we didn't what are you talking about i really want to know more about this i'm like i'm like i need examples like i need like something to know like what the extent of the lies are yeah because like it is like as in a relationship there's a difference between being like oh he's been so dramatic like he's just adding things on to be

funny i'm being like that's actually just listening like that's really weird like why have you just added that on what would you do oh are you in a relationship i always clarify this with yes i am you are how long we've been together 94 years well i know intense okay it's just good to know for the listeners yeah yeah definitely a single gal or yeah i feel like if my boyfriend was doing that i'd be like you're being really weird like what i would just i'd just be like why are you saying that have you yeah tell me more but i'll just be like that never happened why did you say that yeah and then he was just like oh yeah like he was just kind of like but are they doing it to be

like funny i think they do it i think it's it's a deep-rooted addiction like oh i just hit my mic i think it's like a honestly i do think it's a habit like it's a weird thing that you just do and your brain just doesn't even think and it just yeah is it just like word vomit like yeah right okay just habit of like i'm understanding a little bit more i was in the is in the toilets at um uh nightclub and i saw kira nightly why am i getting rid of all the parts of the coffee i haven't seen that in a long time the only way that's fresh in my mind oh my god maybe i've done maybe i've done it before and i've never noticed or something this would be an example i feel. So say like I genuinely did bump into like Selena Gomez in a public toilet.

And then I said, and she like smiled at me and waved and said hello. But she didn't. I did see her, but she didn't acknowledge me. Right. I feel like that's the kind of lie we're getting from these boys. Right. I see. You know.

Okay. Well, she's obviously very irritated by the situation so what are we gonna do i think i'd just be like it's really fucking annoying like why are you adding things on and say what was the point of what is the point of the like like what do you think is gonna come out of you saying that like do you think people are going like oh my god what a cool guy yeah like are you saying it to be funny that's what i want so i'd be like are you saying it to be funny are you saying it to like the shock value like what is the lie yeah intention like what is behind you aiming for yeah but she says she spoke to him and he was just like yeah it's just a really bad habit and he said he's gonna

stop and he hasn't it's like an addiction like i'm i promise i'm gonna quit i'm gonna quit these lies oh my god this is like either you accept him for who he is yeah it's true and liar oh no i'm joking or cold liar he really needs i mean i'd love to know the age of this person actually as well true because maybe it's something that might be something that he might be grows out of if he's maybe young i don't know my advice to you is just say one last conversation of like if i hear one more fucking lie i swear to god oh yeah i'll just call him out when he does it yeah oh my god that's so true if i was sat there and we were all friends my boyfriend was just lying i'd say that is not true that never happens i'm why are you saying that that's not true yeah like i'd actually because then he might feel embarrassed i always think unfortunately some some ways to get through

to people is embarrassing them sometimes we all know like how it feels to be embarrassed and it's horrible so it might have to be yeah that might have to be called him out i would go for that i like that advice yeah next time he does it yeah okay next time Emma. Let's see what we've got. Oh. Is that quite long? Okay. Would you like to read? Sure.

My reading is not the best. No. Everyone that listens knows mine's embarrassingly bad. Here we go. Hey girl. I need your advice. One of my closest friends out of our girl group is getting married soon. Oh, yay.

And as she is close to everybody in the group, she has asked us all to be bridesmaids. Okay. I have drifted away from a few girls in the group and we rarely speak at all. Oh, dear. Due to them living in different parts of the country. Sorry, that was a follow-up of the last sentence um i'm not engaged yet but if i am in the future i feel this huge pressure to ask all of the girls to be a bridesmaid even when i wouldn't necessarily like them to be one i'd hate to upset anyone and cause drama in the group would i be a horrible person if i only asked some of the girls and not

the others i feel quite strongly about not strongly about this but i just think if it's your wedding you're not required to invite anybody agree that you don't want that just because they're within a friendship group i wouldn't and i wouldn't i wouldn't i'd feel cringy about it like i'd be like oh god dread the day that it comes about but i wouldn't i wouldn't be like oh my god what am i gonna do like you're not a bridesmaid at my wedding and it's not that it's not that deep and also like weddings are so expensive so like there's always like not as an excuse but could actually be a reality of like i just actually can't afford to have all of you as my bridesmaid dresses my bet one of my best friends is getting married and she didn't ask me to be a bridesmaid but a lot of the girls

who are like i know and we were in you know but i'm not offended because i've been away like i don't live in my like hometown there's i'm not there as much anymore like i i know the reason so it's like oh i remember when i found out i was a bit like oh that's like, oh, I remember when I found out, I was a bit like, oh, that's like, I would have loved to have been a bridesmaid, but I'm not gonna create an issue over it. Or like take it really personally. No, because she's closer with all those girls than she is with me, even though we are good friends.

And also it's your day, like whatever. Exactly. Were you invited though? Absolutely. And, but she's been very like, you know, I'm only gonna invite people I know.

So like, for example, because my boyfriend, she's never met my boyfriend. So my boyfriend's not invited. No, I think that's fair. That's fair enough. Would you invite like everyone's partner? It would really depend because I think mainly the reason

why she's made that decision is just financially. Yeah, that's my thing as well. Feeding everyone, for God's sake. Weddings are so expensive. Yeah, and also like, it's meant to be like the best day of your life. And I have this weird thing where I was like, I don't want to look at pictures of my wedding day and be like, I don't even know the best day of your life and i have this weird thing where i was like i don't want to look at pictures of my wedding day and be like i don't

even know who the fuck that is i know exactly but then a lot of people are like oh yeah bring your boyfriend bring your girlfriend exactly i don't care yeah i think that would be me but if i if i was in a position where i was able to have people bring plus ones i'd be like yeah real like bring them but i completely feel like in this situation yeah you do not need to be worrying about that like bridesmaids is a big deal like if you're picked to be someone's bridesmaid I think that's massive so like I don't think they can be that shocked no unless they all get married and you're a bridesmaid at all of their weddings you get married and you're like yeah no they might be feeling the same though yeah they probably feel the same of like in terms of oh god if I get

married does that mean so and so has to be a bridesmaid? Like, I just think you... Whoever got married first has really caused an issue here because she's made everyone the bridesmaid and now the expectations are high. I know. Nah, I'm joking. It's your day.

You can have two bridesmaids or you can have ten, but they don't have to be one of them. No! It's your day! It's your day! Do what you want to do hon okay next dilemma um i want to talk about the pressure of getting older and still being single i'm 21 that's so young um and i know being single is great to do things for yourself but i really worry about being lonely for a long time. I live in a small town to give some context and I've tried dating apps, but they just aren't for me.

Any tips? Okay, first of all, you're 21. Yeah, that's exactly my first point. You've got time. You've got your whole life. Oh my God, you've honestly got your whole life. But also, small town vibes, like, I completely get that. Like, I used to live

in a tiny little town as well so i would never date someone from my home no and that's i probably my advice would be if you are in a position to i feel comfortable to get out your hometown yeah i would i'd say that's my advice i'd say go to the big city move to big smulk move to big smulk no just get out of your hometown. Meet new people. London. Is it? That's what I call London. The Big Smelk. Oh, I thought that was New York.

That's the Big Apple. I thought New York was the Big Apple. Oh, I always call it the Big Smoke. Yeah, you're probably right. I don't actually know. Oh, my manager's shaking her head at me. She's judging. Oh, we're going to have to find out. Woo!

I knew it. No. I always thought the Big Smoke was like a massive city. I mean, London is a big city, but it's not like... I don't know why it's called Big Smoke. I mean, is it massive? I don't know. We're experiencing dangerously high levels of pollution.

Fantastic. That's it. My area's not high polluted. That's good. I am right next to the airport, though, which is interesting. No. Anyway. Anyway, moving on. Back to back to you no but i would say

that's what i would say if you can get out your hometown and try and meet some new people like i could yeah you might be feeling a bit underwhelmed with your situation big just because you're you're in your hometown you know everyone she has an experience like out of the hometown life yeah and before i did well i wasn't worried about being single like no oh my god enjoy it yeah when you meet someone these years are going to be very crucial leading up to that to build yourself as a character yeah 100 because you won't get those single years back if you meet the one eventually which you will yeah and i also think it's really easy to to fall into that mindset when you've when you've grown up in the same place and like all your friends have got boyfriends or

and they've been together since they were like 13 and they're like relationship goals and you sort of move away and you actually get a bigger perspective of like so many people are single like in their 30s and they're living their best lives like there's no pressure like you can meet someone at 60 years old and have a good 30 years of them absolutely like i just think there's so much pressure around relationships and when you're young you're probably feeling like this because you're still so young like actually i know your question was like worrying about because you're getting old but actually because you're so young you'll be thinking like oh my god am i ever gonna meet someone am i ever gonna meet someone like yes you are that's the answer to that you're gonna meet someone yeah and like the person i was with

at 21 is not the person i'm with now so it doesn't even make a difference even if you were with someone now because yeah you might not be with them forever anyway exactly exactly i just take the pressure off just enjoy it literally did you feel pressured to be in a relationship i did when i was younger but like i'm talking like when i was like 15 like i didn't you know i don't know why i always used to feel like i don't know in secondary school there was always like precious like yeah lose your virginity which i find really looking back now really fucking weird because when you're like 14 and 15 i'm not even like i've not even grown into my body and you want me to be like there's no way you're having sex but it's actually something so sick about like it makes me feel very ill because i'm like

i'm so glad that i i didn't like i lost my virginity at 16 in in a relationship like but i felt a lot can't relate but like not not to judge anybody on how they've experienced their sexual experiences but it's just the pressure when you're so young you're so young like you don't to be put in those situations lost some ginny at 12 no and i think 12 i got my period when i was 15 yeah like i was not thinking about sex when i was 12 i was playing haba hotel i was like my life is amazing and i just think surely that that time like you you surely couldn't have been ready like there must have been i don't even think i was ready at 16 no there must have been sort of

some sort of pressure attached to that situation which is what i find sad this is when i'm like oh god that's really like especially i hope that was a safe experience and it was all fine do you know what i mean that's what i think so oh hun you've got your whole life ahead of you don't worry about boyfriends. Don't worry about willies. You've got plenty of time for that. Exactly. You do you.

Love you. Love you. Don't even worry about the haters. Okay, next one. Oh, wait, your turn. Oh, wait, is it my turn or your turn? I think it's your turn. Is it?

Yeah, because I just read that. Oh, oh. No, it's me. Oh. Sorry, embarrassing. Okay. Hey, Leah. i think it's your turn is it yeah because i just read that oh oh no it's me oh sorry embarrassing okay hey leah i'm so stuck right now i left school in may 2021 i'm 18 and ever since i've been working in my family's farm shop it's super quiet and super easy i've been working in my family's farm shop. It's super quiet and super easy. I've been working here until I can figure out what I want to do. Career-wise, I come from a huge family who have all gone to university.

Some are engineers, doctors, and have their own businesses. But I'm just not interested in anything enough to study at university. I feel really embarrassed and a bit disappointed that i'm not making much of my life i know that i'm young but i'm starting to panic i'd love to do something that i enjoy rather than just do it for the money if you get me but i don't know what i enjoy i feel like a failure i would love any advice you can give as it's really starting to get me down oh my god did she say how old she is did i miss 18 oh my god this is it isn't it but this is also it when you're young there's so many pressures and so many different

things literally i hated being that age oh it's so hard it's so so hard so stressed okay i think like yeah your family have gone got all these degrees but like i'm the only one in my family that has a degree and i fucking hated university yeah and like my brother didn't go my neither of my sisters when my mum does have two degrees queen oh whoa but i was the only one that went and like look at me yeah but you're doing so well like you found your own thing honestly but i hate that because it's like I know what you're saying it's not for everyone we can relate in terms

of like the actress thing yeah because like a lot of people would see that as like oh she's like pursuing like oh I'm performing

like GCC drama like just never let it go like people look at actresses and they're like it's not a career it's not a career so I can relate

in that sense of like I know the feeling of being surrounded by people like I'm gonna study law and i'm just like absolutely couldn't think of anything worse yeah exactly so if you're happy in the farm shop babe stay in the farm shop yeah you don't need to you don't need to have your whole life planned out no and also my brother's the kind of person where he like we're twins right but we are opposites like i want to be a center of attention i want to be on stage i want to be i want my life to just be full of light wait what's your star sign

it's really obvious i feel like well i don't know what i would say a leo yeah so am i i knew you were a leo i just knew it i just knew it and my and nia my manager is a leo as well oh my god i love leo have you ever dated a leo no chaos never chaos i've never dated a leo i love the drama though of it we thrive of the drama yeah anyway so my brother is also a leo but the opposite of me and he is the kind of person that i wanted a big career like i didn't care about making money like i just want it to be i want to be so happy and thriving and he's kind of person that I wanted a big career. And like, I didn't care about making money. Like I just want it to be, I want to be so happy and thriving. And he's the kind of person who's like,

I just want an easy job so I can go on nice holidays and have a nice house and like have a nice life. And like, you could just be like that. You're just like, I just want to enjoy my life. And my career isn't like a big focus for me as long as it makes me financially stable so I can enjoy my life, I'm happy. Yeah, exactly.

And a lot of people are like that. 100% Own it, it's a good way to be yeah i think it's such an issue of being a young person and like finishing your a levels or whatever you end up doing like college or whatever and there's so much pressure to like you've got to find out what you're gonna go what you're gonna do as a career and go to university but university is not for everybody it's not for everybody i wouldn't have gone had i not gone to drama school like the only way i was ever going to get a degree was through doing it was in that drama school like it wouldn't it i would never have gone on to do english or like genuinely i probably would have gone on an

apprenticeship or something more vocational and practical so there's so many different options and you can still be successful having not got a degree like and also like university puts you like 50 grand in debt i know so there are lots of cons to it so you should be very proud of yourself for being like do you know what i don't want to go and i'm not i'm not going under pressure it's not for me and everyone can go fuck themselves yeah and you'll probably it's it's okay to not know what what's gonna do just live your life live your life don't give into the pressure i'd say as long as you're happy you've got to stay happy okay let's do one last one okay okay here we go oh it's called help

i don't want to rip my boyfriend's clothes off. Oh. Okay. Hi, Leah. Hello. Does anyone know I'm here? Does anybody know? Can anyone see me? Okay, right. I love the podcast and your positivity. Oh.

Sorry. Sorry. I'd love to hear your thoughts on my dilemma. Okay. I've been with my boyfriend for five years. Wow. Pretty steady. Okay. Okay. I love him to bits and he's so sweet to me the majority of the time lol okay oh we're starting off there okay but more recently i have been wondering if this is it our sex life isn't great i've never really enjoyed it or had the urge to rip his clothes off

i know he wants it more so it's definitely a problem for the both of us. How do I approach this situation after being quiet about it for so long? If I bring it up now, he will know I've been more or less faking it for the whole relationship. There's more. Do you think lust and urge to rip your partner's clothes off should always be there, or is it bound to go over time? Can I continue the relationship if I'm not sure the sexual attraction is there anymore? We're looking to buy our second home together as we speak.

So just have no idea what to do. I'm feeling a little bit trapped. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. That must be so stressful. I know. I feel like I don't want to start this on a negative note. As in, it can feel like a really negative situation. Yeah.

Because my opinion is, some people might have different opinions than me, but if you've been, like people who get married, like you have to work at a relationship. For sure. You can't rely upon the spark to last forever. No.

It's not. Like, I mean, I've been with my boyfriend for four years. We have to communicate. We have to like find ways, like make things fun, date date like you have to work at it like you can't if you want something to work you've gotta work work work work work but this is the red flag for me when she said majority of the time whatever it was yeah when she said i've been wondering if this is it now i feel like it's normal to go oh like the relationship's

getting a bit like sleepy like we should be doing this doing that like like you just said putting in the work to keep it alive yeah but to think oh is this it yeah it's a bit like i don't know if you should feel like that no and i think that because that is the thing i think like if you've been together for so long it's easy to be like oh maybe this is my person but you shouldn't be like dreading it yeah i'm like is this it i know is this it i know oh that's really imagine like your boyfriend looking at you thinking is this it oh my god no i know. But I think it's definitely, well, I was going to say it's work throughable. What is the word I'm looking for here?

Oh my God. Let's just go with that. Yeah, it's definitely, you're able to work through this, let's put it in that way. But then I'm not sure actually, because she said she's been faking it the whole relationship well she'd be well yeah is that what she was saying at the

end he's gonna he's gonna think i have or he's gonna know let's see um he will know i've been more or less faking it for the whole relationship i'm i'm feeling like we need to get out of this situation i'm not gonna lie i feel like it's not savable sorry i'm going back on my word no it's over for you guys but you know what i mean like she's obviously like if you if you're able to write it out literally out of your mind onto a bit of paper like oh i'm i'm not happy pretty much then that's confirming it for me you deserve better than that yeah and so does he really yeah exactly sadly yeah not that you're doing it to be in like a bad person or anything like and i think she's right like yeah relationships like i say at the beginning like they you know you have to work at

things but there comes a point where it's like can i really work at this anymore if i'm really not feeling it because i think sexual attraction shouldn't feel like you need to work on that i think that should be there most of the time i get sometimes when you're like not getting on you're just like oh you make me sick but then i know that's that's fine like if it comes in waves where you're like you're not getting on so you don't really want to have sex with him but then if you're genuinely telling me that for five years you're like i don't know if the sexual attraction's there i feel like you should be attracted to your partner. Especially if he's wanting it.

Because that would be, that's the difference for me. Like, you know, there's definitely been like dry patches in my relationship where we're both just like, get me asked. Yeah,

like, you know, but as soon as like one person initiates, it's like, yes. Do you know what I mean? But if he's still initiating it and she's still being like,

no, I'm thinking, okay, that's, that's telling me a lot. it's like yes yeah i mean but if he's still initiating and she's still being like no i'm thinking okay that's that's telling me a lot sorry that's telling me a lot i had a similar one that was really bad the other week this girl said that she's i think she said that it's her fiance but they've been together for years like they have children and she's faked orgasms with him every single time she's never ever had a true orgasm with her partner and i was like oh that sounds awful no but how but i mean that makes this film not as bad yeah you could have children and be like marrying him i mean she's buying a second house you might as well be marrying him this is it like when you're making big life

decisions we need to i think put a halt to some things and just say, like, okay, this is a real commitment. Have a bit of time on your own, maybe. Yeah. Be like, mm. Yeah, if this was my friend, like, saying that in front of her, I would say we need to be single. Mm-hmm.

That's what I would say. I would say this is it in your relationship, and it doesn't have to just be this. Like, you can have a relationship where you do want to rip his clothes off. Yes! And you look at him and you think, ugh, if you don't.

And you're so, and you might not even know, like, I have to be with someone for that long. I don't know how, the age of this person, but like, you might not even know what you want anymore. Yeah, this could be her first relationship.

Yeah, like. She might not even know that, like, a relationship exists where she feels like, oh my God. Yeah, exactly. I think there's more out there for you there is but also if if the relationship does come to like end which is really sad still be aware of like like we said right at the beginning like you still do have to work

at relationships like oh yeah it's unreal unrealistic to think like what you feel in those like beginning months yeah yeah yeah it's gonna last forever but you should still i feel like be sexually attracted to your partner yeah i think she knows yeah from what she's saying hon hon you know and i mean that in the nicest way possible you know like if you're writing it out you know i never say trust your gut because i think that's bullshit especially in terms of like with people that have anxiety and stuff sometimes your gut is just a fucking voice that is just lying to you but in this situation i think you know you know she knows that it's not it's not good enough you know and you yeah if you've been feeling like it for a while as well i feel like nothing's gonna change

okay i think we should wrap up the app i've got i keep having this fear that we're just not recording hello can you hear us hope so yeah yeah all right okay did you enjoy coming on lear on the line absolutely loved it honey can you say lear on the line with your is that good i've been excited to hear that. Oh my God. I've absolutely loved it. I've loved giving advice. Thank you so much.

I look up to you. Thanks so much for having me. Fellow Leo. Leo Queens. Leo Queens. Oh my God. I'm going to, all day I'm going to be talking like you.

I know. Jake's going to want to kill me. Good. Do you talk like it's your boyfriend? Yeah. There was a TikTok where you did a dance and he caught you at the end. it made me laugh he absolutely loves it sorry he can like god forbid we have a breakup he's crazy as well he makes me laugh though which is good because it gives me a break no no yeah i couldn't be with someone who was i need like the sense of humor

oh my god same absolutely all right thank you so much for listening thank you so much for coming I couldn't be with someone who was, I need like the sense of humor. Oh my God, same. Absolutely. All right. Thank you so much for listening. Thank you so much for coming on. Thank you so much for having me. I've loved it. Thanks for listening, guys. Love you.

And I will see you guys on Tuesday for an episode. Okay, you need to do this with me. So, okay. We have to go. Love you. Bye. Really loud. Love you.

Bye. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, you can say you're there. Okay. Okay. All right. Ready? to an love you bye really loud you okay yeah yeah you can say you're there okay okay okay all right ready everybody ready they'll say it with us okay okay three two one love you