Leah on the Line - 24: I've been ghosted for a SECOND time & my bestie is draining me

Episode Date: July 4, 2022

Hi my babes! Welcome back to a new episode! Today's weekly debate is "are you ok with your partner keeping in contact with their ex?". You pretty much were all on the same side today! We also had some amazing dilemmas, from best friend dramas to getting through a breakup. Thank you so much for all of your support, this podcast would be nothing without you!! As always send in your confessions/dilemmas to [e-mail]. Love you! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

hello hi everyone welcome back to a brand new episode of leah on the line happy tuesday how are you how was your monday because obviously i normally say how was your weekend but i spoke to you on sunday didn't i because who came through with a fantastic bonus episode me and it was probably one of my favorite episodes yet if you haven't listened I uploaded an episode on Sunday just a little extra bit of content for you guys um it was another Ix episode and it's probably my favorite episode ever or at least one of like I loved it it was so funny you guys do not disappoint with Ix let me know if you want a part three to that one because i feel like we're never going to run out of x do you know what i mean boy is disgusting um but yeah absolutely loved it how are you how's your week going so far

we've got monday out the way are you like a i love monday person or i hate monday person because i personally enjoy a monday i feel like it's a new beginning you can leave the stress of last week in last week and start fresh you know it, it feels, it feels refreshing. Like every week I'm like new week, let's do this baby. Whereas I can understand some people are like, Oh my God, here we fucking go again. Another fucking week, another week in paradise. Especially if you like, if you work Monday to Fridays and you hate your job, I can imagine Mondays aren't your favorite day, but it's Tuesday. We've got the worst day out of the way, if that is the case. And it's Lear on the Line Day, baby.

Which means it's the best day of the week, along with Fridays and the occasional Sunday. How are you? What's going on in your lives? What's new? Anybody got engaged recently? I'd quite like to see some engagement pics. Anyone got engaged, send me a pic. I'd quite like to sit there, envious of your beautiful lifestyle um what's new with me honestly not a lot um just keep on keeping on that's me just winging it at the moment guys as you know um feeling good feeling feeling good like I should remember that era of TikTok no do

you know what era of TikTok was elite lockdown onedown one, 2020. All the good terms. I'm bored in the house, bored in the house, bored. What else was it? I'm a savage. Oh my God, guys, am I literally giving you all PTSD or what? What a crazy time. Does anyone ever think about that? Like even though we lived it and we're just like still getting through it, does anybody ever deep it and be like, we literally lived a fucking crazy time. Like if you actually think about it. I know at the time we was all going to imagine when we tell our kids this. That we were locked in the house.

I mean a lot of you were locked in the house with your kids. But they probably don't remember it. Lucky fuckers. But isn't that just crazy? Like one day we're going to look back and be like, remember that? I remember New Year's Eve 2020. No, what is it called? Is it New Year's Eve, 2021? No, New Year's Eve, 2020, New Year's Day, 2021. And I was in London and my apartment and all the like London fireworks, you could see them off my balcony. We didn't even expect it. It was

fucking stunning. Um, and I remember crying my eyes out and everyone was on the balcony like, done in um and i remember crying my eyes out and everyone's on their balcony like yeah woohoo and i was like oh my god thank fuck that's over ha boy did i did i get that wrong no it was not over do you know my auntie's got covid at the moment and we were saying like it's fucking embarrassing like if you have covid now like imagine getting covid in july 2022 are we in 2022 yeah and he said 2021 yeah imagine getting covid now it's pathetic it's actually quite childish and she's triple jabbed i was like that you're actually giving me the ick like you can't come out you got covid it was back in the day it's like oh my god she's got covid do you know what i mean it was really terrifying i mean it still is terrifying depending on your health but luckily she's all

right but you know we're just laughing about it being like well to be fair she has had it three times and she's triple jabbed I've had it once I was locked in my house on Christmas day not my house my flat in London I was locked in alone on Christmas day I spent like seven days beforehand alone in my bedroom, literally feeling like I was going to lose the plot, I was literally like, I'm never going to see another wall outside of this room ever again, like this is where I'm going to rot, it was so horrible, I was literally every day, I was like, this is the end, and then I finally, I was living with my ex-boyfriend and flatmate, and I begged them, because they were going to stay on Christmas,

and obviously I wouldn't have been able to come out of my room if they stayed because I had to isolate from them and then he I literally had to beg them both well actually the flatmate was actually already already going but I had to beg my ex to be like please go home for Christmas like I need to leave this room they'll be the best Christmas present ever if I can leave this room and um then he left on Christmas day so as soon as everybody left I literally opened that door and cried to be out of that bedroom I mean I did spend Christmas day completely alone in London in a flat very miserable and I facetimed my family and they were having a Christmas dinner around the table and they like set me up on the table and I was just no one was listening to me I was like hello because obviously

like at Christmas it's so loud in it I don't know if you guys are like this I shouldn't be talking about Christmas at this time but with my family my I've got such a big family that everyone just yells all the time like my family just do not understand normal volume to communicate I do have very sensitive ears um I should probably get that looked at but nah um anyway so in my family everyone just yells over each other like you don't just take a moment to speak you just it's just like a competition like who can be heard who can get everybody's attention and I was just on a phone in the middle of the table like hello can anybody hear me and there was a Starbucks open near me and I ordered a Christmas

dinner panini off subway that was my Christmas Christmas dinner. Never felt so miserable in my life. But anyway, what's that got to do with this episode? Absolutely nothing. Guys, I think I'm allergic to strawberries, no joke. So every time I eat strawberries, the next day, like I'll literally have a million tiny spots on my face, like proper spots as well. But they're not like big spots, like they're like these tiny things just all on the surface of my skin. It's horrid and my skin feels awful as well. So it's not a thing. My mum's allergic to strawberries, but it doesn't break her out. Like she just gets like itchy, like she gets a rash, but it gives me like an intense breakout sesh. And I've noticed it last couple of times because I had strawberry gin the other night and it's happened. And I have been

having strawberry jam and I have been having strawberry jam and I think that could also be a culprit here oh my god if you haven't tried peanut butter and jam I know it's very common like I know I'm not starting something new here and it started in America I think because they have like peanut butter and jelly but it's called jam but whatever I don't want to piss off the Americans any more than I already have but I tried it recently for the first time and it's fucking sensational. Like it literally will. Everyone do me a favour, if you haven't tried it, go, I'm sure you've got some jam and peanut butter in your cupboard. Most people have that, right? Go and make some peanut

butter and jam on toast. It's fucking gorge. Anyway, I'm going to shut up now. Let's get into the weekly debate. Hope you all had an amazing weekend. Welcome to the new week. Welcome to Tuesday. Welcome to, welcome to Tuesday. Like I own Tuesdayuesday welcome to welcome to tuesday like i own tuesdays anyway i fucking do at this point do you know what i mean girls and boys nah i'm joking i'm joking right weekly debate my question for you this week is how do you feel about your partner keeping in contact with their ex okay so actually this was my mum's idea i gave her a list of all my weekly debates ready to fire out and she picked this one. And I can't lie, I'm actually on the fence. I know you guys are going

to be like, what the hell Leah, how are you on the fence? Because 99.9% of responses are saying absolutely positively no, no, no, no and no again. So I mean, I get it. I'm with you as well. But let's have a look at your reasons. But most of did just put no like on its own no explanation you're just like no I'm not even going to tell you why just no no no no so let's have a look what you guys are saying um I'm in contact with my ex once a year and think it's no problem as long as your current partner is aware and no problem same on my side. Interesting. Okay. It's a no from me, but sorry, it's a no from me in general, but different if they have children or pets together. Pets? I'm not being funny. Let the pet go. Is that horrible for me to say?

Is that brutal? I'm not keeping in contact with someone for a dog. Oh, that's a bit horrible, isn't it? I mean it though, I think. I'm'm pretty sure i mean it i'm willing to let that dog go because that dog's going to be fine it will have a beautiful happy life with them or stay with me hun do you know what i mean but do you have to come and see it like a child don't know pick it up on the fucking weekends i mean i'm sure loads of people do that um i'm being civil but there's absolutely no need to keep contact i would hate it unless obviously they have a child together yeah if they have child, obviously you don't really get a say. That's just the way it is. They have to co-parent. Um, somebody says my mom said, no, what's the point? Okay, mom. I love that from you. Thanks for getting your mom involved. Um,

oh my God. Do I have a lifetime of stories for this? No, no, no, no, no contact. I was a mug. Oh Jesus. Somebody says, no, thank you. Unnecessary. Unless of course it's needed. have a lifetime of stories for this no no no no no contact i was a mug oh jesus somebody says no thank you unnecessary unless of course it's needed are you got kids um no no no no no no hell no ooh no somebody says 100 no absolute deal breaker absolute no go x's are x's and shouldn't be involved at all um somebody says nope no never no from me depends on how long ago they broke up if it's recent than no if it was when he was young yeah it's when he was young if it's when surely if it was when he was young surely he can let that go way easier um straight away weird behavior a year after i feel is okay as less slash no emotions involved okay but why are you like rekindling a friendship with

your ex a year down the line that that's curious to me that's curious suspicious was the word i was looking for sorry um don't agree with it no need to keep in contact unless they have a child absolutely not my ex did that and it turned out they were still together hey oh my god wow i need your story time on that one, please, girl. It depends how they ended things. I have no issues with them being civil, but anything more than civil is out of order. No, in no circumstance would this be okay unless kids are involved, she says in brackets. Okay, listen to this, guys. She sent this in three parts. Okay. My boyfriend was liking his ex's Insta pics, told him to stop. I'm not surprised. And then she found a half-naked

Insta selfie from her Instagram saved in his hidden album. She goes, I nearly dumped the C-U-N-T. He no longer follows her. So no to exes. I don't follow mine. Oh, that's it. I don't follow mine. So she's found her boyfriend liking his exes Instapix and saving the half naked ones in his album. And she didn't dump him. Guys, can we? Babe. Wow. I mean, you're stronger than I am to to be like to look past that because wow I'd never get that shit out my head I could never forgive that behavior personally um circumstances matter but in my opinion if they're contacting their ex then they're single oh ouch man um and that's the same friendship group so it's not awkward but no um somebody says i honestly

find it weird there will always be thoughts in the back of my head unless i have a baby together then fair enough makes me feel sick an ex once posted through a birthday card to him while i was there what the what came to the door and posted it oh my god um somebody says it's weird like why frequent contact is a big no, no. Imagine cocktails at the weekend. Ew. No, if they're like meeting up and hanging out, that's different. That is, that's fucked up. Um, somebody says weird. Prob still shagging them slash want to shag them if they're in contact. Yeah, I know what you mean. Hate it. But me and my boyfriend just broke up and we still, we still talk as if we're together

well yeah there you go hon um what you got to keep contact for the weather no thanks love it my partner doesn't have an ex but i wouldn't be happy about it god i was gonna say imagine having a partner without an ex but my first boyfriend didn't have an ex and it was heaven i can't lie it was heaven um no no no girl for me unacceptable. Um, no reason to me and my ex left things on fine terms, but I have zero desire to speak to him either. Absolutely not. That door should be sealed, locked police tape around here. Okay. So let me have a little thing. What I think, let me think what I think. Nobody thinks what I think. So i have never ended a relationship on really bad terms with somebody every single ex i have whether it be like we were just seeing each other we were in a bloody

a relationship for three years like whatever i am always friends not friends but friendly with them at the end so i don't have an ex that i have bad blood towards um and a lot of them I will stay friendly with them for quite a long time but usually just until I'm with somebody else um and as soon as I'm with somebody else I sort of cut that contact not in a like really serious deep official way but just in a way of like more of a respect thing like I'm not going to be messing somebody that I used to be with or have even feelings for um or have even slept with because it's disrespectful to you so I think I don't know I'm definitely I'd listen if I'm talking about a guy I'm with I don't want you to be in contact with your ex no I really don't want that um but just speaking from experience

every ex I've ever had whether it be like a situationship or anything we've we haven't just cut contact from that day of breakup like there's always that slow burning fizzling out of the relationship but you know what I mean like obviously it ends you're not together but the contact has to sort of fizzle for me naturally. And yeah, that's how I feel about that one. But yeah, you guys are pretty much all on the same side. So I guess it's unanimous across the board. Don't, if you're talking to your ex and you're in a relationship, you're not doing a good thing, I guess. But yeah, interesting, interesting. Thank you guys for all your responses I love hearing your opinion all right let's get into some dilemmas let's start off with this one

this is called my friend is acting like the victim all the time oh gold oh gold right hi Leah love the podcast I've been here since the beginning oh my god I love that who's been here since the beginning I would love that I would love that so Please tell me. I have a dilemma and no one really to talk to about it, so I thought I'd ask you for some advice. I'm here for you, girl. Okay. So recently, within the last half a year or so, a really good friend of mine has been acting like the victim all the time. For example, she'll twist the situation when explaining it, or she'll get upset there and then when nothing is directly happening and making it all about her when i've tried to console her when she gets upset she just walks off and blanks me then acts fine later on oh god what's the fucking cause in a scene for

she also recently twisted a whole situation and posted on twitter about it okay are we how old are we let's see i just i don't i can't imagine like tweeting let alone tweeting about something like with my friends that's really like bizarre to me i decided to give her a private message about it because it was making someone else look bad okay good for you um when that's not what happened i was there and saw it myself okay i love that from you i approached it nicely because i know how she is but she just ended up sending back a really angry and argumentative message, so I backed off. Then a few days later, she messages me normally like nothing's happened. It's really draining. So my dilemma is, what do I do about her? Am I being a bad friend? But I can't go on when she's twisting everything all the time, and the up and down with

me also is stressful as I never know what she'll be like when I talk to her do I do I distance myself thanks I really appreciate it love you bye okay so that sounds so draining I can't lie it sounds really fucking draining um I think your friend's probably just going through a little something like I don't know maybe she feels a certain way and this is like her way of I don't know like I hate to be a bitch about things but her behavior is just like attention seeking and that's not to say that's not to disregard her feelings and say that what she's feeling isn't real but the way she's reacting and responding to her feelings is like she's blowing up and being like give me attention everybody come see how upset I am I'm like tweeting about it like I remember when I was a teenager and you'd like write a Facebook status to be like oh my fucking god my friends are fucking bitches like

obviously you wouldn't say that but you know I mean along those wine along those wines it's got wine got wine on the brain along those lines you know like the indirect tweets and stuff like it's because you want you want a situation you want people to know you're upset about something but you you don't have the capability to just address it realistically um so I think you handled it well by being nice in your message but then also what you might consider to have been sensitive and nice may not have been sensitive and nice may not have been reciprocated that way especially over text message or dm whatever it was um so I think it's worth having a conversation and just being like look I feel like I feel like sometimes

things are really blown up when they don't need to be like if if you feel a certain type of way and if you feel upset about something you can just talk to me calmly like an adult and I can reassure you that it's not about you or you know be there to listen to you if you need a friend but this whole storming off blowing up hot and cold it's really exhausting and it's it's really emotionally draining for me as your friend um I it must be draining for you as well and I don't want you to have to live your life like that you know like let's learn to communicate our feelings um I think that's what I would do if it's my friend I'd just let's let's practice some communication shall we um because

that's just what she's lacking here like she's not communicating with you she's just blowing up um because that is like the easiest way to show somebody that you're frustrated or upset is to be like ah and walk away and send off an angry tweet um but it doesn't get you anywhere and it just actually pushes people away so I think if she is a friend that you do want in your life it is worth having that conversation of being like listen I love ya I love ya but I hate staying here no I love you but I'm not like I can't play these games like if you're upset with me just let's communicate like adults babe like just let's have a calm conversation like I don't want to have to chase you and be like what's wrong why are you snapping like why did you storm off do you know what I mean I think it's worth that

just a little bit of communication but you said you know it's draining you um she twists situations it's really stressful for you um and you said do you distance yourself so I mean if that's something you want to do you have a right to do that you know like if people aren't bringing out the best in you you don't actually have to stay around them. And I stand by that. Like if somebody is only having a negative impact on your life and you feel like you've done what you can to turn it into a positive and keep them in your life and it's not worked, you also have the right to just be like, do you know what, this isn't, this isn't good for me, so yeah, I think have a little think, decide what you want to do when it

comes to that, but other than that, yeah, I think just maybe just to ask her to be a bit more gentle with her communication and not so, oh, so angry, I'm gonna send off a tweet, do you know what I mean, oh so angry I'm gonna send off a tweet do you know what I mean uh good luck with that girl love ya okay next dilemma oh okay actually before I'm gonna give you an update you got an update from last week so you guys remember the girl that was in an on and off two-year relationship do you remember that we have an update um they broke up here we go hey Leah I have an update from a dilemma I sent a week ago. Do you remember the one with the two year relationship on and off? Yeah, we broke up. I tried to speak to him about how I felt about the relationship. I said to him how we don't

call anymore and he said he's got nothing to talk about. Excuse me. You have nothing to say to me, your girlfriend. You've got no interest in a conversation with your girlfriend. Okay, continuing on. Then I said we barely see each other. He said petrol's expensive. I mean, you're not wrong, but fuck my, don't be so fucking rude. That's just rude. fucking rude. That's just rude. He had an excuse for everything. Then I started crying and he rolled his eyes. Can you imagine? At that point, I hit a breaking point and I said, I can't carry on. I don't feel supported or loved. Good for you, girl. He said, if I want to end it, that's on me. What the fuck? Give a fuck, Andrew. I can can't remember I feel like we gave him a name and I cannot remember what it was god knows but give a fuck come on look at me um um at that point

I hit a breaking point and I said I can't carry on blah blah he said if I want to end it that's on me I wish I could tell you the whole story but it's honestly so long i know it was the right decision but i do feel a little lonely i literally have zero friends oh no so i guess it's my time to get fully comfortable in my own skin yeah do you have any advice on what to do to heal i don't want to sit on my phone watching tiktoks anymore what is that what is it that helped you after your breakup thank you for being the best friend i've always dreamed of having and i love you honestly so grateful for you oh so you do have a friend you little liar you got me um listen i think now is the time to um build friendships what got me through my breakup are my friends um honestly shout out to you justin what would have done shout out to jodie my sister shout out to my mom

they're what got me through the breakup um it really is the people around you that pull you through whether it be your friend your sister your family like whatever they will like i remember my friend said to me like when i was like i'm like my relationships end and she was like i was like i don't know if i can do this like what am i gonna do and she was like I will literally drag you through this by your hair if I have to and Zoe my best friend she said that to me she was like look Leah I don't care what we've got to do we're gonna get you through it you're gonna get through to the other side and did I absolutely fucking lately sooner than I thought so I think um you said you

don't have you have zero friends but I doubt that's true and I'm sure what you mean is you don't have like a bestie but i'm sure you have like mates do you know what i mean or just people that you talk to make an effort with them make plans be like let's fucking do something i haven't seen you in ages or people that you've lost contact with try and salvage these friendships um or go on bumble bff um you can literally put in your bio, like, going through a breakup, really need some friends. And there will 1 million percent be other girls on that app that are going through a breakup that need some support as well. And then you can drag each other through it. So I think build a support system for sure. But also, like I said, get comfortable in your own skin.

So now is your time to feel that real independent. I'm an independent woman. I don't need no man. And do you know what? All he was doing from what we gathered last week was making you feel like shit and dragging you down. And amazing. You haven't got anyone in your life doing that to you anymore. This is fucking amazing. This is fantastic news. Congratulations on your breakup. But yeah, my advice is the support system, 1 million percent. That is what gets you through these kind of things

in life um whether it literally be your mum your dad your brother your sister your old friend from 10 years ago that you'd always have that little bit of love for like reach out like honestly do not do not isolate yourself because it you will just end up so um used to that and so used to being by yourself and you don't have to spend your life feeling like that you don't it doesn't need to be like oh i've either got a boyfriend or i'm miserable like you know you can you're gonna absolutely love this in in a couple of months time you're gonna this is gonna be the most amazing thing you've ever done it probably already is you said you said you know it's the right thing so I love you for that and yeah everything is going to be gorgeous and amazing just like you um let's move on to new dilemma um okay this one is called

going off clubbing is it because I have a boyfriend hey Leah love your podcast heads up this email is a jumble all right girl let's dive in basically i have a dilemma probably not even that deep to some people but it's stressing me out listen if it's stressing you out as deep it's fine you don't need to you don't need to to defend it okay everything's fine you can speak about whatever you want and lear on the line my dilemma is that i've been going off clubbing for a while now and i'm at uni i'm worried everyone will think i'm getting boring or always going back to my boyfriend even though I just have had enough of the night after going for drinks. The night after? I don't know. But do you think I'm going off clubbing because I have a boyfriend? On Saturday, it will

be my second night in my new uni house and two of my friends and I are meant to be going to a silent disco on the beach, which I can't wait for that sounds amazing that sounds like a great time but I'm also going to Mexico for two weeks a night later and I want to spend quality time with my boyfriend before I go however my two friends want to go clubbing with me after the beach thing and I don't know what to do because I think they'll think I think they'll think I'm only going back now because I have a boyfriend and get funny about it but it's true I am as I want to see him now after writing this I don't know if I even want to go to the beach thing at all because if I go I want to drink and then I can't go back to my boyfriend ah what do I do please tell me I love you bye okay take it from me girl you'll go into that

beach thing all right I hope I'm not too late, when did you send me this, um, Wednesday, and, um, you're going on Saturday, um, shit, shit, we could have missed, we could have missed it, it could have been just gone, oh, fuck, let me know if you went, so, let me just tell you why I hope you went, let me give you some advice, let me give you some advice let me give you some advice who the fuck do I think I am so from my experience in relationships I did a terrible job at balancing my relationship friendships personal life family life like I did a terrible job at making time for more than my relationship basically I was exactly like you once upon a time I was like I don't want to go out because I want to be in bed with my boyfriend and he's going to be asleep if I get home and then what or I'd finish a shift at work and everyone would stay for a drink after and I'm like well I don't want to stay because then my boyfriend will go to sleep and then I don't get

to spend any time with him and then after a while I was like I'm pathetic I'm actually pathetic like when you actually think about it like why am I living my life so I can just spend an extra half an hour with my boyfriend and listen I don't think there's anything wrong with you wanting to spend time with your boyfriend before you go away for two weeks absolutely normal but there needs to be boundaries that you set in place for yourself and force yourself to go out and have good times because otherwise you make that mistake of if your relationship ever ended and fell apart you've got nothing and you're so used to spending all your time with him that you've got nothing to do no one to spend time with you've lost your friendships because they get they just

had enough of your ditching them for your boyfriendship and then you look like a fake friend when you come running back so i'll come running back yeah because dylan don't want to be with you anymore so make sure anyone listen to this that that knows i know it's so common we all do it you just prioritize your boyfriend you love spending time with your boyfriend i know we all love it we love spending time with our boyfriend it's the best ever but you have to make sure that you still prioritize yourself and your friendships and these nights out because one day that is going to be these people are going to be like we just spoke about when your relationship falls apart the people that get you through it are these friends

so if you don't make time for these people one your breakup gets 10 times harder because you're you haven't spent any time away from the boy then all of a sudden you don't have you don't get to see him anymore and then you're like who the fuck am i without this boy but also you don't have those friends anymore and they're going to be what drag you through this shit so i would say definitely i know it's too late but it's just speaking for future times go to the thing on saturday um and if you don't want to carry on drinking after don't you know like do both go out to your night out and then go and see your boyfriend and spend the day with him before you go or two days before you go away for two weeks

you know um yeah honestly to anybody listening to this who knows they're guilty of just prioritizing their relationship honestly don't do it because you if that relationship ever fell apart ask yourself like who are you without that relationship make sure you know the answer to that question if my if my boyfriend turned around tomorrow and left me do I still have friends a life like um do I still have friends, a life, like, routine, like, do I still exist without this relationship, because I was in a relationship once where I did not, and it makes being broken up with, or left, or even the relationship falling apart, or having an argument in your relationship, it makes it 10 times more difficult so yeah to anybody that needed to hear that i hope that helps i love you i hope you went okay next one hey girl i need

your help i was seeing a guy since march who i met on tinder we deleted tinder first date and went exclusive on the third whoa okay everything was moving very quickly i'm 24 and he's 30 he asked about marriage slash kids etc and said he wanted to settle down fucking hell we're getting we have a love bomber on our hands ladies and gents he was amazing constant texts and phone calls all day however there was a couple red flags which i'll explain, one of them is the love bomb, babe. I already know where this is going. I think I know everything, don't I? Just shut up, Leah. We had little arguments. My intuition was telling me he was lying about stuff, as he could never keep to his story. Oh, do you know what? Fuck off with lies. I hate lies. Even a white lie. Just shut up. Fuck off with your lies. I can't stand it. I can't bear it. Anyway,

just shut up fuck off with your lies i can't stand it i can't bear it anyway sorry it's not about me my friends slash family would always think i was overreacting and overthinking then at the beginning of may one day he sent his usual good morning text then nothing he ghosted me wow how are you sending me a good morning text and then in a few hours you've decided you don't want nothing to do with me anymore prick i was so upset so i tried calling nothing rude wow where's the respect i then send a long paragraph which i regret now oh yeah we've all done it babes we've all done it listen if you're thinking about sending a boy or girl a long paragraph about how they've hurt your feelings don't do it because they don't give a fuck and then you just regret it after okay take it from take it from me and this girl um not speaking from recent experience by the way just we've all done it haven't we and eventually the next day he responded he said the next day oh thanks nice of you to

fucking respond you little twat he said he hadn't lost interest and that it was him oh my god not the old he oh my god the it's not me it's you i mean that's me that's something i was fucking saying i meant it's not you it's me imagine somebody said to you look it's not me it's you it wasn't a test for me it's test for you and and you failed sorry my mic just cut off everybody that was it that was the universe telling me to shut the fuck up and just read the dilemma um where am i okay he said he hadn't lost interest and that it was him blamed his past said he was used for his money and cheated on okay i was still her and said if he liked me enough he would have talked that through with me yes yes girl so we left things we didn't talk for a couple weeks then he randomly sent a pic of him on holiday and i missed him so i offered to meet up with him

once he got back however that never ended up happening as he was dragging out meeting and then hung up the phone on me i'm sorry it's pathetic he's pathetic okay hung up the phone on me we then didn't speak until two weeks ago when i accidentally called him whilst trying to call another guy oh you better not be lying to me i hope that is the truth because i'm not buying it anyway i said i didn't mean it but you called back and we spoke we both agreed on what coincidence hey bet that worked out in your favor didn't it babes we both agreed it felt that nothing had changed so then we continued to speak a little bit and agreed to meet up okay this guy is playing you like a fucking fiddle and I'm not even joking right I was gonna be in his town that weekend as my friend

stays there and I already had another date. Girl, go girl. So that Friday I went on my date. Just before I left, he texted me, but I ignored it. Queen. After the date, I called him. Oh, damn. It was late. He called back and came to pick me up. Fuck me. Fuck more. You went on a date and then you called him. I mean, I mean, whatever, girl, you do you to be fair. He called back and came to pick me up. We went on a drive. He showed me his new house. He apologized for the way he treated me and said he just wasn't ready for a relationship, but said he was ready now. Oh, okay. Let me just fuck myself then, shall I? If you're ready, let's do it then. I'll wait around. I'll live for you, shall I? Um i um i spend the night at his we didn't sleep together the full time we've seen each other or that night as i like to take things slow okay

good for you i mean i wouldn't judge you if you did sleep with him to be honest um we cuddled and were up all night speaking about the future he loved bombs to the max doesn't he he said i was the type of girl who wanted to marry as I hadn't slept around and he spoke about kids. He showed me his baby pics and had deep chats about things. We agreed to try and take things slow. I said I was seeing someone else and just didn't want to rush things. Okay, good for you. He dropped me off and we continued to text slash call that week and had agreed.

As he was working in my town that week, we would see each other on wednesday here's where it starts jesus you're telling me we haven't even started this guy's fucked around enough already right wednesday comes we're texting etc he said he'd be at mine for seven oh god i'm gold i know where this is going i called him at six ish and he said he was just picking just packing up and would call on the way about 20 minutes later he called things were a little weird he said he was stressed he needed to stop for petrol and that he couldn't stay long as his mum wasn't happy about watching his dog okay i said that was fine and he said he'd call me back once he got petrol i was driving home at the time once i stopped i looked at my phone and

noticed he had blocked me on everything i hadn't i had been ghosted for a second time he made a promise at the weekend that we would just say if we weren't feeling it and i wouldn't do and he wouldn't do what he done last time but he has i need your advice how do i get over this would you block him back should i try to get revenge or just move on i've also found out that he's lied about his exes cheating on him and he lied about being in a hospital when we were talking just so many lies so it feels like a blessing in disguise but still hurts p.s sorry this is a long one thanks so much oh i just got my breath back from that one jesus i mean girl you're not at a loss to be honest by the sounds of it. Like you said, good fucking riddance, to be honest, that's what I say. This guy, he doesn't know what the hell he wants. He's got this idea

in his head that he wants to get married and has this life in his head of beautiful children and this amazing future, but he doesn't know how to fucking act like a normal person and treat somebody well to get that, and he love bombed you listen if he tells you all of this and he's exclusive view and fucking date three and all of this listen sometimes it works out okay i've i've moved really fast in my relationships as well but usually i consider that a red flag and in this situation it was a red flag because he just was chatting shite essentially i'm not saying he doesn't want that marriage he doesn't want these kids everything but listen he was feeding you bullshit so that he could get away with this sort of behavior they

don't treat you like a mug and then talk to you like a mug they treat you like a mug and then talk to you like you're the most fucking perfect princess in his life and he wants to marry you and be with you forever because otherwise without that shit he doesn't get away with the behavior do you know what i mean so listen how do you get over this you get over it by thinking thank fuck he is gone what a waste of my time fucking waste of my time no seriously though what waste of my time how dare you waste my time go to me twice though, what waste of my time? How dare you waste my time? Go to me twice. Twice. Do, what's that stupid saying? Do me once, shame on you. No, fool me once, shame on you.

Fool me twice, shame on me. No, I'm not saying shame on you. I'm not. Listen, we've done it. We all give people another chance. We do it. I do it all the time. I'm a mug as well. But what I'm saying to you is this guy is not worthy of you he does not deserve you you're still going out on other dates good for you i'm really proud of how you acted in this situation i'm really proud of the fact that you put him in his place and you're like look i'm seeing someone else i'm not sacking him off for you mate yeah we'll take it slow me and you but just so you know there are other boys that want me just so you know um and look good fucking riddance babe that's what

i say good riddance um get yourself out there girl and you sound like a absolute fucking gorgeous sexy stunning queen like all of you are and you'll have nothing to worry about you're gonna absolutely find somebody treat you well and that's what you deserve love you okay next dilemma so my five-year relationship ended six months ago oh wow five years geez but we are still so close and meet up speak often oh dear oh dear we both agreed that we are free to do what we want as we are separated yeah yeah yeah yeah listen no it don't work like that. Okay. Anyway, I'll carry on. I still have a lot of feelings for him, but another guy popped up to me the other day. We spoke on text and then met up in our cars just to chat. Love it. Nothing else happened,

just a chat. And I had no intentions of it really meaning anything. Just a friendly chat of a boy. Okay. You don't have to defend yourself to me honey um now my ex is annoyed and upset and this other boy is getting his hopes up and won't leave me alone now i feel guilty af on both ends am i a horrible person love you bye okay let me tell you now you and your boyfriend saying oh yeah like don't worry like we're still free to do what we want with other people well we're obviously not then babe babe, are we? Because you're annoyed at me for having a fucking chat with a boy in his car. We're not free to do what we want because you're annoyed. So you need to make a decision. What do you want to do? Do you want to remain

friends? Friends, quotation marks. Meeting up with your ex frequently. Speak often. Yeah. meeting up with your ex frequently speak often yeah always a difficult situation so um i think you need to decide together if you want to continue this interesting friendship we have going on and this is going to happen you're both going to meet other people this is that's part that's how the cookie crumbles how are you going to be able to cope with that you know how are you going to be able to deal with me going out and kissing another boy then bradley okay are you going to be really are you going to be like this about it because if you are it's not going to work is it mate we're gonna have to come to an agreement here or um you go look bradley i don't i don't want to feel guilty for going out with a boy I'm single so this friendship thing it's not gonna work and I'm cutting it here

is that brutal or are there your only two choices I'm not sure I mean your third choice is to get back together with Bradley but I don't know if that's what you want um and feeling guilty about the other boy I mean he probably just likes you poor boy let's not like you know don't worry you you're just a gorgeous stunning girl how can you not fall in love um I mean as long as you've communicated with him like look I'm not looking for a relationship right now then you've got nothing to feel sorry for and if you haven't communicated that then let's communicate that now yeah um but don't feel guilty you're not doing anything wrong you do not owe anything to your ex at this point um but that is a difficult thing when you stay in contact it is okay i've been there you're like

yeah you know we talk all the time and all of a sudden you see them talk someone else you're like how can you do that to me but then they're like i'm single i'm single and they technically are but it still makes your blood boil whereas when you when you do the no contact no contact is key babies when you do the no contact it doesn't hurt you anymore so have a little think maybe i think have a nice mature chat with the ex-boyf and be like look this is just we're both gonna end up quite hurt by doing this, aren't we? What do you think's best? Um, well, I'm tired.

Guys, Catherine Moore has started on Love Island. Oh, let me close off that dilemma. I love you. Everything's going to be fine. I'm proud of you. You're beautiful, gorgeous, stunning, and life is going to be amazing to you love you bye okay sorry Catherine Moore started what do you guys think I have said since day one that Jax's head will turn it's just a prediction I have um we will see we will see I would like it if he if it didn't and everybody is happily you know nobody gets upset but it's

casaramo baby everybody's head is spinning 360 this year they're literally spinning spinning spinning round non-stop like i remember last few years like when it was casaramo especially the girls it was like no casaramo and it was like it was scary it was like no whereas this year there was like whoa Casarama fresh me I was like whoa girls and boys so I'm really excited I love this season I'm so excited to see who's going with who this year let me know your predictions I love our love island chats um and yeah i'm just loving life at the mo thanks for listening to this episode guys i don't know what's going on with me i'm literally chatting pure shit aren't i i'm really tired today i've been so tired every single day literally what's wrong with me

so tired all the time i literally well i don't sleep much well i do i just sleep at a shit time like i'll go to sleep at like 4 a.m most, but then I don't wake up till like 11. Like what's going on there then? How many hours is that? 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, seven hours. That's, that's enough. Like I should be awake. Do you know what I saw on TikTok the other day that's so true, right? How come if somebody goes to bed at 9pm and gets up at six right gets up at 6 a.m they're like wow so so proactive and incredible but if i go to bed at two and wake up at 11 i'm lazy like why is that why does that make me lazy when we get the same amount of sleep do you know what i'm saying why is why does that make me lazy that's what i don't get like you're fucking lazy you're in bed by nine ten o'clock at night that's lazy get up live life i'm up living my life till two o'clock in the fucking morning yeah yeah i'm the lazy one. Strange, strange behavior. Anyway, just a great point that I saw.

But yeah, anyway, guys, send in some confessions. I hope you will cause some chaos this weekend and you're ready to send it to me via email. Learontheline at gmail.com to anybody that doesn't know or head over to my Instagram at Learontheline. hit follow if you already haven't and there is a link tree in the bio and then my website's there which is where you can submit them as well if you would rather do that so yeah um thank you oh by the way I think it was last week I was like everyone go over to my Instagram and like comment orange emojis you guys blew my fucking post up I was like wow these are the best friends in the whole world and she was like I am hot stuff right now but yeah honestly guys love you you're the best friends ever and I did it wasn't a lie I did go stalking on loads of your pages actually probably all of

them if they're not private and liked loads of your pictures commented on a couple of you um and yeah just just returning the love so should we make that regular thing no i'm joking that sounds really beggy and disgusting but maybe i am just one big beg hey all right guys um thank you for listening and i will see you on friday send in some confessions don't forget all right see you on friday you bitches love you