Leah on the Line - 77: My bf will NOT change his mind on a baby name & am I just a booty call?

Episode Date: August 1, 2023

Hey babes! Welcome back to another episode of Leah on the Line. Thank you so much for all of your love and support on the podcast, it honestly means the world to me. I hope you love this one!Head to leahontheline.com to send in your dilemmas and confessions. Love you! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

hello hi everyone welcome back to a brand new episode of lira on the line happy tuesday happy tuesday everybody how has your week been well i know it's only tuesday i mean like the last seven days because i haven't spoken to you since last tuesday and let me tell you why my boyfriend decided his appendix was going to well they didn't burst but they were on the verge of it so jamie was in hospital and not to like mean this about being about me or anything but obviously like i have health anxiety like i have anxiety queen and it was it was a difficult time for me how can i make this about me like not you having a fucking surgery in leo season like

darling do you know what i mean anyway no all jokes aside it was really fucking scary he's fine though but yeah it literally happened on wednesday so let me tell you a little story right so he is he drives quite far for work because well i'm not gonna like tell everyone what he does but basically like his job involves just going around the fucking country every now and then yeah i know red flag whoa but anyway this wednesday he was driving to somewhere just outside of london basically and he had pain for a few days on like your typical appendix or about to burst area and the night before i was like well why don't you just call 111 I always get confused is it 111 or 101 111 anyway I was like why don't you just call 111 and tell them your symptoms and see if they're like well could be this could be that because we wasn't sure what it was at this point right so anyway he started to call 111 and then it

literally was like um thanks for calling blah blah blah and then he just hung up he's like oh I can't be bothered like I'm fine I'll be all right next day he gets up at 5am kisses me goodbye bye see you later so we thought right and then I wake up at my usual time 9am listen I'm self-employed I can wake up when I want all right don't judge me i think that's quite early for someone that just wakes up when they want okay so i woke up and all my messages from him are like so i'm in the hospital and i was like whoa there man what you talking about and i was like what the fuck has happened and he basically said that he called 111 on his way to work and they were like get to the nearest hospital like get to the nearest hospital asap like time is not your friend right now so he he was like well can i like drive back home

you know where my family are and go to the hospital in my area and they were like no no no no no absolutely positively not so he goes to this hospital like three hours away from me and he doesn't know anyone in the area like he's actually three hours away in a fucking random hospital thinking that they're probably just gonna have a look at him you know maybe give him a little x-ray give him some antibiotics whatever it is and send him on his way and he'll be home for tea no no no honey he was like put he was admitted into a ward and then i don't really know the exact terms for what I'm saying here so just you know whatever and then he we were just messing each other the whole time obviously calling and I was like what the hell are you okay and I can't drive guys

if this hasn't forced me to get in my ass to some driving lessons nothing will okay so anyway I'm just dressed to fuck like oh, oh my god, like, I feel like the worst girlfriend in the world, like, my boyfriend is three hours away in a hospital, like, however many miles away, I can't drive, there's no normal train route to this place, it was, like, fucking a billion trains, right, and I'm panicking, and he's, like, don't worry, like, I'll be all right, like, you don't need to come, like, we don't even know what's going on yet, blah, blah, blah, so I'm like, right, okay, just keep me updated, keep me updated, and I'm here, like, dear universe, please keep him safe, dear universe, please do not let anything bad happen to him, just, you know, do my thing, and then he basically was waiting

around in the hospital for, like, 24 hours, pretty much, and then they were like, we think we should just get you straight in for surgery because it sounds like it's probably appendicitis but we ain't sure um but if we just have a little look like cut you open have a little look we can deal with it when we're in there sort of thing um and he's like oh okay so he's waiting and waiting and then we're getting all stressed and upset and i'm like when is this operation gonna be like you could be like days i just feel like the worst person ever like if i knew when the operation was gonna be i could maybe figure out a way to get there i don't even

know and anyway before you know it he's like um they've just come into my room and i'm literally going for surgery right now and i was like oh my god i'm stressed i'm stressed i'm stressed and i was like please ask them how long it's gonna be like ask them how long it takes i'm all over fucking google like how long does appendectomy take and I was like, please ask them how long it's going to be, like, ask them how long it takes, I'm all over fucking Google, like, how long does appendectomy take, and they're like, usually an hour or two, I was like, right, an hour or two, give it, give it an extra hour for, like, him to get put to sleep, wake up, waiting around, like, whatever, whatever, I'll hear from him in three hours, five hours later, haven't heard from him, I'm stressed, right, obviously, I catastrophize, okay, I literally do

it for a living, like, I should be paid, it is a full-time job at this point, and I'm catastrophizing, like, oh my god, like, he just didn't make it, and then my best friend, who's poor, my poor bestie, he's, like, keeping me through this whole thing, I got my bestie and my mum going, Leah, it's keyhole surgery, like, he'll be okay, like, it's keyhole, like he'll be okay like it's keyhole and i was like oh my god like he didn't make it like i was literally like having visions in my head thinking i'm raving some on like seeing into the future and they're like i'm so sorry like he didn't make it and i'm like oh my god like stop so i'm literally torturing myself like crazy like you genuinely have no idea what my brain is capable of honestly it's a joke right and i was like

on the floor in bits at this point my mom's like oh my god leah like he's gonna be okay like don't worry and my mom's like do you want me to call the hospital for you like why don't we call the hospital find out when he's come if he's come out of the surgery yet because obviously he's got to wait i've got to wait for him to get back to his ward before he can even call me plus he's he's been put asleep so he's all fucking all over the place do you know what i mean so i'm just catastrophizing like like no tomorrow anyway i call the hospital and i was like hi i'm so sorry i'm just wondering if anyone could let me know if my boyfriend's awake like i'm really sorry like really i know i know you're probably really really busy like love love you guys love the nhs but i just wonder

like if anyone's just like let me know and then this lovely woman lovely she's like yep operation went smoothly he's awake you know just waiting for my colleague to take him back to his room i was like oh my god give this woman a pay rise she did her job beautifully like beautifully where did i say beautifully honestly i was like oh love you thank you love you bye love you bye like she just made my night i was crying my eyes i was like oh god it was so traumatic fucking keyhole surgery to get his appendix out is it one in 13 people get their appendix out i know all the stats on appendice on appendicitis now guys i've been researching it like i had an

essay to write honestly so that's where i've been okay i know it sounds like no big deal because it's like well whatever like why does that mean you had to miss out a podcast on honestly if I recorded the podcast in that state um you guys probably would have reported me um and been genuinely concerned so uh sorry about that that's my story thanks for listening to my TED talk um but yeah he's fine he's absolutely fine i just um bandaged up his wounds for him he's got a little scar of his belly buttons kind of cute lots of little stitches kind of growls kind of slay and yeah we just finished watching the love island final what a plot twist didn't see it coming guys i won't lie jess and sammy are the winners i'm happy for them i am happy for them you know they all deserved it i did see Ty and Ella winning

I'll be honest I did see Ty and Ella winning um but you know I would have been happy for any of those couples to win to be honest I literally couldn't have called it any of those couples so yeah it's good to be back I missed you guys guys. Let's get into the episode. Thank you so much for listening to Lear on the Line. Head to learontheline.com to send in your dilemmas and confessions. Remember to follow on socials to see visual clips and get involved with the weekly debates. Enjoy the episode. Love you. Okay, everybody, who's ready for a weekly debate honestly i'm very relaxed right now i've got uh what they called uh essential oils diffuser going right now i've got a bit of lavender and chamomile going around the room it's quite beautiful jamie's got this tool you know those like face suckers what are they called like poor suckers it definitely has a name extract vacuum poor vacuum

yeah i'm not sure if it's gonna rip the shit out of my face but i'm excited i'm excited i have broken out like this crazy i started to think that because basically right with my skin one day it will be flawless and i will appreciate when my skin is good because it means a lot to me right and I'm like oh my god like I'm not wearing any makeup like a sleigh sleigh sleigh like my skin is a sleigh today and then I will wake up the next day and I will have no I'm not overreacting when I say this a million tiny like spots and they're like little whitehead ones so I can literally push with my acrylic now and it will just make the tiny little pop kind of gross. Sorry, guys.

Sorry about that. But I don't know what it is. And it just goes and it comes back. Right. And then I was looking into like skin because I'm very into my skincare. I absolutely love my skincare. Right. And I've been I think I've already mentioned I've started to use the snail mucin.

Yeah. And I don't think it's that because it happened before this and yeah so I don't know what it is but I was I was researching all different types of like breakouts and stuff and I was like oh maybe it's fungal acne because when I look at a picture of it it looks like that but then apparently fungal acne like you can't pop them like they're like in in poppable unpoppable spots so i don't think it is that but then they're not like big spots like big hormonal spots that i get every now and then like during your period or on your period whatever whether like the under the skin ones or like

they're the big ones that you just can't fucking hide because it's like a volcano on your face they're these tiny and there's millions on every part of my face all over my face so if any of you guys have ever studied any sort of dermatology or you have experience in this please give me any advice because my skincare routine i've i've what's the word like i've what's the word like dumbed it down i don't know what the word is i'm looking for but i was using skin and me for ages and i loved it but then i started to feel that my skin was a bit dry and I thought you know what let me take a break from it and then my skin was like really clear for ages and I was like oh maybe the best thing for my skin is just to not use anything so then I came off of everything

and I was just literally like washing it and moisturizing it and then I started to get a lot of texture on my skin so I was like right okay so I need like a chemical exfoliant so I started using Paula's Choice AHA toner and I think it may be that I'm not 100% sure but when I think about it like I've had this issue with my skin for years and it will just come and go come and go come and go and I don't know what it is maybe I'm like allergic to some sort of ingredient maybe it's a makeup product but yeah if any of you guys have any idea please let me let me know but sorry about that so yeah anyway let's just get into the weekly debate so my question this week is does distance really make the heart grow fonder we all know the saying it's a classic you know distance makes the heart grow fonder but does it though do you know what

i mean let's see what you guys have to say because I'm sure lots of you have experience in this one as well okay I think it just makes you get used to not being with the person yeah do you know what it's very true I think you can definitely just adjust to it like I'm sure there are cases where you can never adjust and it never gets easier and it's always hard but I feel like there are a lot of cases where you kind of just that's just the way it is you know we're comfortable in our distance we're secure and it is what it is so yeah it's a good perspective yes defo but with good communication honesty and regular visits we just finished three years of long distance and we're happier than ever oh my god that's amazing I'm so happy you finally came to the end woohoo now you get to love life and enjoy it together

um it depends if they aren't making the effort to speak then no but if they are it shows that they care about me which in that case i agree then yes it does that yes it does if it's meant to be then yes if not then no i mean very simple, but kind of fucking true, really. A little bit, yeah. Having hobbies nights away allows you to miss your partner. I definitely agree missing your partner is so healthy and necessary to an extent. Do you know what I mean? Even if it's for a night.

Yes, I was long distance for four years. The last year, my boyfriend and I have had a normal, quotation marks normal relationship we're actually stronger than ever if you can overcome that you can overcome anything cheers to the damn future cheers to you babe no not if working away life never feels settled when they come and go weekly yeah that is true like you just you i'm sure some people you have to be the type of person that can just be all right in that sort of situation like you said if they're working away but I'm sure there are so there are so many people that's just like I just want a routine do you know what I'm saying no I think you really want to see them but when it comes to it you're just disappointed

do you know what I I agree not not in this situation now obviously me and jamie don't actually have distance anymore but there's definitely been like situations or it doesn't even need to be like relationships like it can literally be like you know when you're excited for something you know when you're like you're counting down for something a lot of the time it can be underwhelming so yeah i can see that my boyfriend has been away for seven months with his job so yes it does but it's hard 100% it's helped me and my boyfriend loads to appreciate the time we get together so true yeah it makes the time that you have a lot more special sometimes 100% although for the relationship to work there has to be an end date for the distance yeah we spoke

about long distance I think we literally did distance yeah we spoke about long distance i think we literally did a weekly debate like can long distance relationships really work and i think a lot of us both feel we'll all feel the same of like i think it can work but if it doesn't as long as it doesn't feel endless you know personally no for me but i have found it to be the case with men as they come running back right so we're talking like the no contact kind of distance sorry about that yeah it does but it also creates distance between you as a couple I actually would agree with that I can imagine that that is definitely the case sometimes my mum always says it makes the heart wander slave from mom i definitely fancied my boyfriend more when we didn't live together i hope this is normal oh weekly debate did you fancy your boyfriend or girlfriend more before you moved

in together i didn't i don't know i guess it's one of those things where it's like, well, once you live together, it's like you walk into the bathroom and you can smell the shit they just had, you know, like, or they, you see them when they, when they haven't had a shower yet or they, you know, they're not very well, you know, like you, you don't just see them when they've made an effort to get ready. Do you know what I mean? Maybe that's just what it is but i love that that is a relationship you know arguably it makes the mind clearer so if you actually like them yes if not then you realize oh this is actually such a great point that is such a good point and i actually think i agree with you there like if you can be away from someone and you're still like yep I'm all about this person like I fucking love it or if you're just like oh I'm just really not

that bothered it kind of just gives you an answer sometimes what's going on my voice tonight well yes the long distance part of my relationship ended on Friday now we're back close we couldn't be happier I feel quite smug about it oh I love that for you yes I spent a week away from my boyfriend this week and my love for him grew oh I love that I think it depends on the person I realized with my ex we weren't compatible he thought the same as well but with another guy it definitely made it grow fonder yeah that's what I mean hon like I feel like sometimes it can just give you the answers I think oh this is a good point I found that distance make you realize

makes you realize that you can cope on your own I that kind of actually backs up thing I feel which is I think distance makes the heart stronger so I feel like when you don't see someone a lot and when you you become very independent it is so it's a great way of making sure that you aren't consumed by a relationship which means that if this person isn't treating you right it's easy to just cut it off easier okay it's never easy but it's easier to just cut it off you know when they aren't part of your every day or when they don't consume your mind and your daily day-to-day activities do you know what i'm saying so yeah and i don't know i feel like it does make you realize you can cope on your own and therefore it makes you stronger does that does that make sense like I don't know if it makes the heart grow fonder I really don't

I think it can it can make you forget about all the things that are problematic in your relationship because that tends to be the things that come up and become apparent when you're in person together so like whether that be messiness around the house or bickering laziness like whatever it is that you find like a pet peeve about your partner it's not going to bother you when you're away from each other so I feel like it can seem like oh we're just so happy we're just so happy because you don't have those things bothering you and then you can come back together and be a bit like oh you're annoying do you know what i'm saying so yeah a lot of you are definitely saying yeah i think most of you

are saying yeah i would actually disagree and that is only because I feel like the only reason I think it feels like the heart is growing fonder is because the issues aren't presented to you you know I'm saying does that make any sense that's just my um spin on that one guys all right thank you so much for sending in your responses love them appreciate them and let's get into some dilemmas okay let's get into some dilemmas thank you so much to everyone that sent them in remember head to leahontheline.com to submit any dilemmas confessions weekly debate ideas or dilemma updates i always forget what the fourth one is i'm like there's definitely four what the fuck is it okay let's kick off with this one so hi leah i love listening to your podcast while striving cracking up to myself oh hey babe drive safe i'm feeling a little bit down

and confused about a recent dating situation i was seeing this guy for a few months let's call him harry harry was amazing he seemed to adore me and treated me in a way i've never been treated before the way men are meant to treat us period well i just said period period anyway things were going great i'd asked him how he thought things were going and he said great too and to keep it up yeah great keep it up he was always planning dates great at messaging me and very affectionate stunning okay he has a little girl who's five and his last relationship was very toxic over a weekend his little girl was very upset missing her mum which i know must have hurt him

the monday after out of the blue he ended things with me saying he can't give me the time I deserve and needs to prioritize his daughter I'm devastated as everything was going so great and it's left me wondering what's actually happened that weekend for him to just switch just the weekend before he was checking his daughter's birthday plans didn't clash with mine in November please send me thoughts on this it's hard not to hope he changes his mind thank you see that is a difficult one because we don't really know the ins and outs I'm not sure if you were like if you've met his daughter and if you were there that weekend or what because I feel like it you know sometimes maybe she might be finding it a little bit difficult having like a new woman around this is just if you have met I'm not sure if you are like if you've been introduced to her yet but if you have it could be a case of like

she might be finding it a little bit difficult he's picked up on that and wants to prioritize that she's okay and she's happy and she's ready for that so it could just be that you know where he's just like you know this is causing a little bit of upset towards my daughter. I'm prioritizing her, which I would understand. But if it isn't that, I think it's quite difficult because at the end of the day, we sit there and we go, why is it? Is it something I did? Is it something I said? Is there somebody else? Is it the ex? Why is he not being honest with me? Is there something he's not telling me? am I missing something and we sit there and we pick everything apart trying to understand like what happened

and I think sometimes when somebody literally just says to you like I don't want to do this with you anymore it's so awful and difficult but I think the only thing we can do like we have one option here and it's just to accept it like I know it sounds so easy I know it's like oh yeah well done Leah like I fucking know that hun but what I'm saying is try and find peace in the fact that it is just out of your hands at this point and just be like look you know what he's a nice guy we had a nice time together whatever's meant to be will be like you know he said he's a nice guy we had a nice time together whatever's meant to be will be like you know he said he was genuinely interested in me he said he was genuinely into me and he's just prioritizing his daughter right now if we're meant to be then it will happen at the

right time but right now i'm not going to worry about what i did you know there's nothing wrong with you there's nothing wrong with how you handled anything you know just don't dwell on the situation and try and pick it apart try to just go okay you know what this is attractive about him that he is prioritizing his family and I'm just going to respect it because at the end of the day it is a case of like you're worthy and good enough and no matter how much it hurts being rejected by someone we have to just go it's nothing to do with me like he's just not in a position where he's ready ready to give me what i want and deserve and that's nothing to do with me do you know what i mean like you're amazing you're beautiful you're funny you're kind and he knows that and

you know that but it's just not worked out right now and it might do eventually but at the moment he he can't do this right now and I feel like it is just a case of having to go okay you know I understand I respect it and go back to whatever it is you were doing before this person came into your life because you will be absolutely fine like you're amazing and strong enough on your own and you have the strength to go through it and I know you like you said you're just sat there hoping you know low-key hoping he's going to change his mind and the reality is he might and you'll just have to decide if if and when that time comes if you are still interested and just cross that bridge when you get to it because i think

it's highly likely that he might but if he doesn't like we need to understand that this whole situation is not a reflection of you just a reflection of the fact of the fact that this is not right for you or him right now and that's okay and whatever's meant for you will never pass you by surrender the power to the universe it's always working in your favor you know does that make sense i hope it helps and yeah love you keep me updated with that one there is an update form on learndeline.com if you weren't aware love you babe sorry that was a short response but yeah i don't really know other angles i can look at it besides just sort of remember that it's not a reflection of you and you're incredible regardless of whether someone's ready to pursue a relationship with you or not you know love you let it be all right um next one

hey leah was lovely meeting you okay guys if you remember I told you before right I had my filler done with Jessica Rose Aesthetics best in the game fucking lover and she sorry she and as I came out lips swollen bumps all over the forehead from the Botox and all I heard was Leah and I turned around and I met one of you guys absolutely lovely gorgeous girl but worst time in ever I looked like a freaking freak this is her hey Leah was lovely meeting you after you had your filler I'm seeing this guy and we both really like each other and I would say I'm starting to love him however he never likes my instagram pictures or stories when a lot when a lot of other guys do it's like he does big he does big me up massively in person though all the time i noticed he does

like other random girls posts though i brought this up to him and he said it shouldn't bother me due to how much effort he makes in person but for some reason I wish it was him reacting to my Instagram content not the other guys and why does he like other random stuff of other girls but not mine am I overthinking this thanks I have a suspicious feeling that we might have a little bit of two-timer on our hands or something similar to that because for you to bring it up to him and him say well it just shouldn't bother you first of all don't tell me what should and shouldn't bother me shut the fuck up second of all it does bother me i'm telling you it bothers me and it's not hard to give it a little double tap and the fact that you've brought it up to him and he's still continued not to like

your posts and show that what's the word like the public the social media flirting right he's not doing it even when you've told him like you know how come you don't he's still not is he's doing it on purpose and i can't understand the reason whether that be he's talking to other girls or he for some reason somebody else might they can't know that he's talking to you it's it's given suspicious um let me let me ask jamie two secs um let me let me ask Jamie two secs okay back that was quick so I just spoke to him obviously paused it and he's on the same page as me and he says that basically this could be totally wrong this is just our opinions remember but it just feels like he's hiding you for some reason the fact that you've brought it up and he's still continued not to it is it just feels like he's

hiding you and i cannot really figure out why there could be somebody else who might be like i'm not going to name you but let's just give you a fake name of of molly right somebody that he's seeing let's go with ella i've just gone with love island girls okay so ella's gone to him and been like oh i know she followed this molly girl like is there something going on he's like no no no no no and now he can't like your pictures do you know what i mean this is one option okay not to freak you out not to freak you out but this is an option we got we got to be wise here honey do you know i'm saying could be an option um i am due for more botox in a couple

of weeks so if i bump into you we can talk about this in more detail and we can share more teeth but that is one option another option is that he just doesn't see your posts um yeah maybe he just doesn't see them uh another option is i want to know who the other girls are like are they like influencers are they celebs or are they just like other random girls that he knows because if so why liking the pics and not mine do you know what i'm saying i would just literally ask again like i would literally ask again no shame i'll just be like i just want an answer like why like why don't you like myself like that's low-key embarrassing like from from him like why you're not liking my pictures but the thing is is he you're saying that he like bigs you up loads in

person stuff so it could just be a trust your gut situation like maybe deep down you you can feel it's nothing to worry about and you can feel there's no one else like sometimes you you got just knows whether you can trust someone or not um otherwise i don't think there's anything wrong with you saying like these other girls that you're liking their pictures like are you talking to them and seeing them as well because i would just like to know where i stand and you don't need to tell me the ins and outs of it if you are but I would just like to know where I stand and if it isn't just me that you're chatting to I think I have the right to know that you know you don't need to tell me who they are which ones they are but if if I'm sat here feeling like this is heading in a

certain direction but you're on a whole nother page to me, not liking my socials, but liking everyone else's. I would just like to know, you know, I'm not going to be pissed off. You obviously are, but we won't tell them that. I'm not going to be pissed off about it. Just tell me I can handle it. I'm a big girl. I'll go home and cry, but you don't need to know that. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Let me know. Keep me updated. Because that was really fucking confusing. That one genuinely has baffled me to be honest. I cannot figure out what that thought process is. But yeah, if he didn't like anyone else's and I'd be like, Oh, it's just obviously not a big deal. Like he doesn't like Instagram pictures. It's not that deep. But the fact that he's liking everyone else's you've asked him why he's not liking yours and he's just like, shouldn't bother you.

But it does. So do something about it babe i mean all right i love you next dilemma hey girl hey babe so my partner my partner is adamant on a baby boy's name for a baby boy we do not have nor is in the making and we won't even and he won't even consider any names any other names for some reason this has made me giggle like he's like listen i love the name dylan and you won't change my mind and you're like first of all i'm not pregnant second of all i'm not using the name dylan no offense if your name's dylan Nothing wrong with it. It was the first thing that came to my head, right? Anyway, I'm not 100% on the name yet. Sorry, I can't fucking read.

It's pissed me off. I'm not 100% on the name, but he says I can choose the next name. And if we have girls, then he doesn't care what I call them. You're nice. Like, what? But I still dislike the name he has set on for a boy so part of me is

hoping we don't ever have a boy together but is that bad of me for feeling this way and for not wanting the name he so desperately wants i just think it should be a compromise and he makes it out like i asked a lot for him because i'd like to get engaged slash married one day and so i should let him choose the boy's name if we would have one so he's like listen if I'm gonna propose to you and marry you you're gonna let me choose the boy's name what this is a shared baby like you don't just this one isn't yours it's not like what if I marry you then I'll get the boy like darling I hope this makes sense and i'm not just talking nonsense but i need to know if i'm being too stubborn and not understanding or i don't know please give me your honest thoughts

on this i need your input please also loving the podcast by the way you're amazing thank you love you bye love you so much thank you for listening thank you for supporting i love you okay i think he is fucking stubborn i don't think you're being stubborn at all. Because put it this way, right? Say I was pregnant. Please universe, one day. Not right now, but one day. When the time is right. You know, say I was pregnant and I was like, I love the name Scott.

And Jamie was like, no, I cannot stand that name. It would put me off the name Scott. Because I'd be like, well, you need to like it. I want you to like it just for my sake, not because I want you to be happy with it, that, but more importantly, because it's just going to ruin it for me, for me, if you don't. So if he's like, I want to call him Scott and you're like, I don't like the name Scott. These names are so random. And you're like, I don't like the name scott why is that not making him like oh what that's such a shame okay well what names do you like i don't know how about bobby and he's like okay how about james and he goes james is all right you go okay let's write that one down

you know like surely that's the exciting part where you you discuss and you and you rate out of 10 and you rank in the notes app like surely it's not a case of scott is my future son whether you fucking like it or not like no i surely it doesn't work like that saying that i i have certain names I love, like love, love. And if Jamie was like, no, I would be like, yeah. That's actually not true. I wouldn't because it, like I said, it would spoil it for me. I'd be like, for fuck's sake, you've put me off the name now. I really liked it and I was excited about it and I ruined it. So yeah, it's given selfish.

It's given stubborn um and it's not really something people often I'm sure people are like that like I'm sure there's loads of couples out there that have had this discussion where it's like I'm choosing this name whether you like it or not especially if it means something to them you know like put it this way this is a good example my middle name a lot of people don't know this my middle name is levain right and it is a family name it's passed down in generations it has so much meaning to me and my family it's my mum's middle name like it just is very special to me and without a shadow of a doubt my future daughter please universe if i'm lucky to have one she's getting the middle name levain and i will not be budged on it you can't even quite you can't

even go are you sure shut the fuck up yes it's not a question and that is something that is special to me and important to me that listen you could tell me i fucking hate that name we're gonna have to break up to be honest because it's got it's gotta it's gotta stay it's gotta stay and in in this case i would get it if it was like it was really special to him you know maybe it was like a name that maybe it's a tradition where he's named after his dad his dad is named after his dad his dad is named after his dad his dad is named after his dad and he wants to name his son after him to follow the tradition because it means so much to him I would get it I would get why it's so like please just let me have this

do you know what I mean it's special to me it means a lot to me please please just let me have it I can understand that more if it's literally like oh it was my favorite character on a tv show when i was 10 always wanted it so i want it i'd be a bit like well i'll put it on the list do you know what i'm saying so yeah i kind of want the deets on that one let me know what you guys think oh great weekly debate great let me add that to the notes great weekly debate um i'll just put baby names for now just to remind me great weekly debate love you yeah let me know what happens with that one i mean you're not even planning on having this baby anytime soon you know you like you said this baby isn't even in the making yet but um let me know when it is i'm all is and i'm excited

for this future baby scott okay love you next dilemma hi babe hi angel i've listened to every single episode of yours whilst getting ready for work or chilling before bed and I love you my anxieties are oh my god that is the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me I cannot imagine me easing someone else's anxiety it's hell in there honestly but I love that I'm really happy anyway I have a dilemma for you for a of a backstory, I work at a spa that is joined with a gym and a guy that works there, let's call him Jack, 23, and I, 21, started talking and flirting last October where we ended up meeting up and did it in his car. Raunchy. Fast forward to Christmas and we hooked up again after the work Christmas party. It's always the work colleagues, guys. Christmas Eve, Jack messaged me and said, I'm taking you out in the new year. We love a dominant king.

We love a dominant king and I did admit to him that I fancied him. He then spoke to me in person about this date and he organized that we were going to the beach bar and have a walk etc. Well that never happened so I then had a three-month situation ship with a guy jan to march this year so distanced myself completely from jack during it fast forward to now and he has constantly been flirting with me since and we do get on really well i've been around as i've been around his recently to in quotation marks marks, keep him company. Oh yeah, that'll just snap. And I've slept with him or had a snog a couple of times recently on work nights out. He doesn't message me though. We don't talk outside of work really. We just flirt and chat at work and then he'll

message me if he wants to do something. Okay, he's giving booty call. I feel like it's just been an on-off thing on his end. Not just this though. My best friend who I work with at the spa, we'll call her Katie, ended up getting very close friends with Jack, especially from June, where since then they've just been messaging all the time on Snapchat. Fucking hell, Katieie get your own katie has a very floaty personality and broke up from a three-year relationship in june oh shit it's fresh she's on the prowl she is now however talking to someone new perfect fantastic crack on katie hope it goes well for you she knows how i felt about jack and knows we link and i like him and i just feel so uncomfortable of how close they are like i mean they talk every day having conversations even when they're both at

work they're texting okay okay it's been said by her that they're just really good friends and i don't think there's anything physical going on but it's really getting to me I'm finding it hard enough at the moment knowing where I stand with Jack let alone Katie constantly messaging him even when we're getting ready to go out or when we're having a girl's day shopping getting lunch together oh fucking hell Katie rub it in babe yeah I really need some advice on how to go around this do I speak to her do I ignore it because it's nothing and I'm just being stupid because there's feelings or do I bin him off completely and not give him the time of day anymore it's so so hard tip from me girls don't get into a sticky situation with a work colleague

please help a girl out love you bye oh it's tricky okay i feel like you can talk to her like you said you she's like your best friend at work i think you come at it from an angle of like i'm not accusing you of ever doing anything wrong here babe maybe come with it come at it from an angle of like so you know like how i really fancy jack like like i'm like you know really into him as a friend you know do you think what do you think about him like what do you think his intentions are with me like does he flirt with you like it's obviously i know you're on issues with him i know you're not interested i know you'd never do that to me but like do you think like is he flirting with you like do you think he probably like flirts with all the girls like what vibe does he give you and his messages

to you like just curious like just wondered you know maybe that could be the angle we come from it and she might be like i don't know he's quite laddy with me like he like talks me like one of the lads you know like it's given bro you know and then it's like oh phew thank god let me see so yeah yeah like like can i just see an example like just roughly like like what he says like does he call you like bro or like babe or like like mate or like sexy like so yeah or she might go oh yeah but he's just a floaty person you know what he's like you know jack flirts with the fucking walls and he and then you go yeah yeah so it's jack all over hey let me see yeah so true shamey you know what i mean i think that could be a good angle just to get um get an

idea of of how she perceives the messages and don't come at it from a way of like well you know i'm into him so like why texting him do you know i feel like that's pretty good plan i feel like plan chat to katie go ahead and feed back on that one but back to jack yeah like i said it's given booty call he's given i'm horny where's the sexy girl from work when i need her you know and it's up to you if that's that's what you're okay with because at the end of the day if you're on the same page great fantastic you get sex he gets sex no one gets hurt but if you genuinely have feelings for someone, it's dangerous territory. And we've got to tread carefully, honey, because this is where we could get hurt.

And if we can suss out, because like I said, it is giving booty call. And from a bestie perspective to you, I'm going to say it feels like it's just sex. And if you want more than that, I'd probably just stop sleeping with the guy and try and just bin it off you know be friendly you know I'm sure the flirting will continue but a flirty banter or whatever but maybe stop with the sex if he texts you oh you know it's always fun when he texts you and he's like what you up to and you know he wants to have sex i'm just out just out with friends oh who just this guy just this guy oh and then we might get well i thought we had a thing going on i thought we yeah we did like this he's just my bestie like relax we know where we stand or if he's like oh sick like have fun well no to be fair some people would just hide their feelings

even though he could low-key be really bothered but sometimes bothered doesn't mean they like you sometimes it's just because they don't want anyone else to have you so yeah basically don't talk to any guy ever because they chat shit um my personal opinion as your best friend is it's not looking good and i listen don't get me wrong i think he thinks you're sexy i think he thinks you're great in bed i think he thinks you're fun you're sexy you're funny you're good company you're fun to flirt with you excite him but I don't think he's actually interested in anything more than that not just from you just in general right now I feel like he's just enjoying the casual casualty is not the word that's like like like a injury isn't it word that's like like like a injury isn't it what is the word like casualness because i was like he's enjoying the casualty but that means someone's getting hurt he's enjoying how casual it is that

makes sense that's english so yeah i think that's where he's at but again just my opinion could be wrong he could be madly in love with you who knows he could just be his messages with katie could be all about you this is my delulu i'm like oh my god like he's literally messaging katie like i can't see i just can't get off my mind i'm crazy about her he's probably messaging her like not okay operation suss the situation out with katie and play games play games what's his name again what did we call him jack i think so something like that well he's called jack now play games with jack what what are you up to you busy tonight yeah i'm busy actually i'm busy for the next 28 working days fully booked fully booked busy busy girl that's what i'm saying yeah let's play some games

listen i didn't say listen to leah on the line because we're going to teach you all how to not be toxic did i i said listen to leo on the line that was it okay love you okay guys good luck everybody with all of those dilemmas keep us all updated we're dying to hear what happens next week let's have a little look okay i have confession i need to get this out it's a paragraph guys i'm excited for this one so during lockdown i was hooking up with this guy that i worked with i'd hooked up with him before i started this job however i knew he had a girlfriend and she was my manager bearing in mind he had listen i don't wanna like insult anyone here these are not my words okay he had probably the smallest dick i never had

okay not my words all right listen let's not shame anybody for what they got but it's just part of the story okay to the point of faking orgasms cut to a year later i find out that my best friend was also hooking up with him at the same time to this day the girlfriend doesn't know but yet he still tries to get in contact with me me and my bestie compare what he was like and we both came to the conclusion that it gave us no pleasure love you love the pod right so not only this guy is this guy out here just not satisfying people but he's just full just full cheater just a whole cheater serial cheater i mean what can you really do with that information wait did you yeah you knew he had a girlfriend

and she was your manager and you were doing this i cannot condone this behavior but i love it for the podcast thank you but you know what I hope his poor girlfriend finds out and runs a mile um I feel like you just have to live with the secret you know like what are you actually gonna do you know I mean it's not a dilemma so I don't know why I'm even giving my advice thank you for sharing I love you so much okay I haven't had any kind of romantic or sexual experience with anyone yet and I'm nearly 18. Listen, this does not need to be a confession. Like, this is genuinely completely normal. Like, do not stress.

Do not worry. It's a good thing. I lost my virginity at 16 and it was way too fucking young. Like, I don't even know why. Anyone lose their virginity at a young age and had a good time? Not many, you know. So, don't worry, worry babe you're smashing it love you proud of you okay I delivered a boy I had a friends with benefits in secondary school

wife's baby that was confusing for me to say so I'm assuming right so she's a midwife i delivered a boy i had a friends of benefits with in secondary school wife's baby so the guy that you were sleeping with in school you birthed his wife's baby you did not birth it you delivered it why did i say that you delivered it whoa i mean could you imagine no actually guys could you imagine you go into labor the pain the fear the stress the agony you're walking hi i'm going to be your midwife for today it's that fucking bitch that you used to sleep with in school oh i demand another midwife i mean i'm assuming she didn't know or at least it was so long ago that like no one cares you know like you went in a relationship hopefully it was just like oh you know um you know throwback oh I mean like you're having his baby

you know could have been me no all right next confession oh I actually don't know if I'm in love with my boyfriend that's that's tough guys that's a tough one i had sex with someone once oh my god whoa whoa whoa guys i had sex with someone once and found out he was my cousin a week later what the fuck could you actually imagine and then she's put gorge had sex with someone once and found out he was my cousin a week later gorge could you imagine that could you imagine that me and jamie have literally had this conversation we're like can you imagine if like one day because when do you guys remember when i did my ancestry dna test i was like could you imagine if like we did the family tree thing and then like we were on the same tree like oh fuck like that that is a fucking nightmare that is an actual nightmare but as we've discovered

people will have sex with their cousins knowing that they're fucking cousins mate so don't worry about it that's so fucking crazy to me okay um i was meant to be going on a date but the guy's attitude stank so i blocked him fucking love that from you love it okay let's do one more um i think i have feelings for my co-worker he's engaged and has a child oh well we have to we have to get rid of these feelings babe because he's engaged and has a child so these feelings they got they gotta be pushed down i've got to take a deep breath and get just get on with things you know all right wow guys there's some heavy confessions this week okay let's wrap up the episode okay wow guys thank you so much if you sent in a confession remember leahontheline.com if you

have anything to confess leahontheline.com if you have a dilemma let me help you out i'm here i'm all ears baby if you have a dilemma update if you have a weekly debate idea leahontheline.com if you have a dilemma let me help you out i'm here i'm all ears baby if you have a dilemma update if you have a weekly debate idea leahontheline.com if i didn't make it clear enough all right guys thank you for listening to this podcast episode i enjoyed it so much i actually had a really good laugh today i really needed it after the traumatic week look at me my boyfriend's just been for a whole surgery on his own i'm like this has been really traumatic for me so try not to do that again all right has like fucking scared me though because remember i was telling you that i'm pretty certain i could be dealing with endometriosis and obviously the way that they diagnose that is keyhole rather not know rather not know at this point anyway my period is due around the 15th so if i'm missing podcast episodes around the 15th of any month

just know that that's why all right just a heads up all right babes thank you so much for listening to this episode thank you for being in my company thank you for having me in yours I thoroughly enjoyed it hope you all have an amazing week and remember if you're drinking at all and getting drunk stop thinking about the ex. Don't text your ex. Text me instead. And I'll speak to you on Friday for a brand new episode. All right.

I love you. Bye.