Leah on the Line - Bonus 41: The HONESTY episode

Episode Date: May 4, 2023

Hey honeys!! In this episode I asked you to honestly answer some quite confronting questions... Have you ever cheated? Do you seek people's validation? Do you frequently check your partner's IG following? Have you had an inappropriate sex dream? Have you faked an orgasm? Have you ever lied about your body count? Does size matter? Do you ever doubt the direction you took in life? All very random but super interesting questions! I enjoyed this episode so so much! Thank you soooo much for your support, it means the world. As always send in your confessions/dilemmas to [e-mail]. Love you! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello. Hi, everyone. Welcome back to a brand new episode of Lear on the Line. Happy Friday. Happy Friday, everyone. Bank holiday weekend, coronation weekend weekend can't say I'm excited for it I am going to be in London um which is going to be very scary being in London at a time like this petrifying but off I go I'm really looking forward to hanging out my mum and auntie to be honest but being in London during the coronation I think there might be something wrong with my head but whatever it'll be worth it what do you guys have planned anyone that's working i feel you i've worked in bars since i was 18 as we know and i know that feeling when everyone's in high spirits because there's a bank hole and that just means your shifts are

even shit of the normal i know that feeling it's even busier your nights are even longer your shifts are even harder and everyone's like whoa bank hole and you're like whoa fucking brilliant isn't it i'm stuck behind the spa darling so anyone working this weekend i love you thinking of you commiserations but this episode is going to be really really fun it is the honesty episode no fibbing around here no lies we gotta be honest okay you calling me a liar well i ain't calling you truther remember that show drake and josh what's the song from drake and josh oh it's gonna annoy me i got it well i never thought that it'd be so simple but i found a way i found a way apparently drake bell went missing the other

days when found now thank god hope it's all right but i remember back in my hardcore believer days when i was obsessed with justin bieber like unhealthy like actually quite embarrassingly scary obsessed with him fanfic times all right and drake bell tweets something horrible about him and i'll just remember thinking you jealous boy because you fell off after drake and josh yeah you've been where have you been since 2007 drake yeah anyway glad he's all right anyway this episode is going to be really really interesting i've put up some very confronting questions one of you did dm me and say it felt like therapy just answering them which has made me very happy I'm glad I'm glad we could all get things off our chest anonymously today so let's not waste any

more time let's find out the truth about all of us I'm going to be being honest as well guys I promise I would never lie to you let's just get straight into the episode thank you so much for listening to Leah on the line remember to leave a a rating on Apple podcast and Spotify and hit the notification bell. You can send in your confessions and dilemmas to Leah on the line at gmail.com and follow me on socials at Leah on the line and at Leah Levine to see visual clips of the podcast. I love you. Enjoy the episode. Okay, welcome to the honesty room. It's like the honesty box, right? This is going to be so interesting. I've got a whole range of questions from things about relationships, about our failures in life, anxiety, about appearance. They are totally random,

all very different, but all very interesting to me. I'm very intrigued to see what the percentage is saying. So I'm just going to kick it straight off because we've got a lot of questions to get through today, everybody. First one, nice and simple. Do you have dermal filler? So I mentioned this before. I'm really intrigued to know like what percentage of us have had like a lip stand cheek filler whatever it is I'm really intrigued because I felt like it would be a lot and I'm surprised by this it's only 22% of you guys obviously this is just you guys just the listeners it's not the entire nation but 22% of you guys have said yes and 78% have never had any dermal filler so i love that for you guys but

yeah just for some reason i think because i know so many people that have had filler i just assumed it would be like i thought we're talking like 45 like i thought it was like a lot of women and men as well obviously but my listeners are predominantly women so yeah I thought it was going to be more than that but yeah it's nice it's a good thing I think you know just loving yourself and being happy in your skin I'm happy for you guys it's absolutely stunning but I'm in that 22% so okay next question kind of similar have you ever considered getting cosmetic surgery so this isn't filler this is you know nose jobs boob jobs whatever else right um how many will think what you think the response is going to be because i think this is kind of upsetting actually only 36 percent have

said no 64 so a lot more than half of us are saying, yeah, we have, we've considered getting cosmetic surgery. And I am with you. I still now want a nose job. And I think if I'm ever in a financial position to do it, I probably will, to be honest, like, I'm going to be straight up and honest with you. It's the honesty episode at the end of the day darling but yeah only 36 percent have said no never considered it never gonna do it and 64 percent of you are like yeah I thought about it and it's kind of sad isn't it but you know I'm in it as well I feel it okay next one do you frequently check your partner's following on Instagram now this one actually surprised me as well. I'm shocked. And again, pleasantly surprised. So have a little think what you guys would assume the answer is. I thought it was going to be like a 50-50 pretty close split. But it's actually 70% have said no, you don't. And I'm with

you on that. I definitely don't. And it's a good thing. However, I've been you on that I definitely don't and it's a good thing however I've been in relationships where I have so I think this is a nice thing you know but 30% yeah I do I'm frequently clicking following checking recent who the fuck are they who the fuck is she um how the fuck do you know him do you know what I mean so yeah interesting, interesting. Next one, big one. Have you ever cheated? What do you guys think the response is gonna be? We did this in the cheating episode. And this is good. This is good. It's very similar to that episode. 80%? No, I have not, babe. No, I bloody haven't. But 20% have. And when you look at the number of people that have clicked yes, it's kind of scary. It's kind of scary. But 80% no. So what does that

mean? Two in 10? Is that right? Two in 10 of us have cheated? I haven't. Why am I saying us? I have not cheated ever okay never will never would um but I think am I doing the maths right two in ten if it's 20% yeah yeah that's correct right yeah okay so yeah 20% have cheated it's all right no judgments everyone makes mistakes everybody has those days have you had a sex dream about someone inappropriate now this answer i'm not surprised because i feel like i know it happens but it's kind of it's kind of unsettling 71 have said yes 29 have said no i've never had a sex dream about anyone inappropriate i i don't think i've ever had a sex dream i truly don't i really don't i don't think i've ever had a sex dream i truly don't i really really don't i don't think i've

ever woken up and been like whoa what the frick like yeah let alone about someone inappropriate but that means 71 of people have which makes me think about all of our partners if this is a common thing what the fuck have you dreamt about when you're waking up next to me do you know what I mean anyway sorry to put that on everybody's head next one oh oh controversial does size matter to you no you know what I'm talking about you know what I'm talking about okay what do you think what do you think about this answer okay my personal opinion is it does it does personally it does okay you don't have to agree you don't have to agree now that doesn't go to say that if it's not like an ideal size then it's it's bad it doesn't mean that you can still be incredible in bed but if we're just talking about how it feels sex and how pleasurable that is I'm thinking size has a has a lot to do with it you know um

but 60% of you disagree and 60% of you have said no 40% are with me and you think it does so yeah it's a good thing it's a good thing you know you can still make it work you can still you still have so much to offer you know it still feels great but for me personally it's just I sound like I've got a humongous puss no no no no okay next question if you're in a relationship do you flirt on nights out i'm pleasantly surprised i'm relieved by the response 81 have said no i do not but 18 of you 18 going on nights out have a little flirty flirt iut. I mean, I know it happens. Do you know what I mean? But I'm happy with the response there. Next question. Have you ever faked an orgasm?

What the hell do you think is going to be the response? I knew it was going to be high. I knew it was going to be high. I knew it. I've never faked an orgasm ever in my life. Why would I do that? You know, this is, this is meant to be good for me as well. Like I'm not having sex with you to make you feel good about yourself. You know, if it's not, if I'm not having an orgasm, why am I going to put on a show? Do you know what I mean? This is about both of us. Why should I pretend it's good to, you know, but I I do get it a lot of women say that like you fake it just so it's over like yeah I can't moving on I mean once you know it's you're not going to get there but I've never done that I'd rather just be like let's do something else you know what I mean

but yeah I've never done it but 75% of you have that is most of us most of us have done that that means oh I can't do the maths here like basically only less than two of us is that right or more than two less than more than two and a half of us have not maths Maths is not my forte. Basically less than three of us out of 10. If there's 10 people in a room, almost eight of them have faked an orgasm. That's high. Okay. I'm going to move on because I'm giving myself a seizure with that maths next one have you ever lied about your body count so I've never lied about my body count in my life because I'm just not ashamed of it and I don't think it's anything to be ashamed of anything anything for anyone to judge somebody on I'm just I'm gonna I'm also a very honest person I can't lie even if

it's a white lie I can't do it I'm gonna go sleep at night I'm really pathetic like that but yeah so I haven't but 61% of you have said no and 39% of you have said yes you have lied um which I get because also I understand it's like it's no one's business if you don't want to tell someone the real number don't don't mean it's also got to do with you yeah next one do you watch porn in a relationship this is very split we've got 51 have said no oh okay it's just changed new in just in 52% have said yes and 48% have said no interesting okay 52 have said yeah you do so basically half basically half of us have said no we don't and half of you have said yeah we do it's pretty split I'm surprised next one is do you mind if your partner watches porn now 68% have said no and 32% have said yes we have spoken about this briefly when it comes to only fans and just masturbating and porn and a lot of you have sent me dilemmas over the last year or so about you

don't like your partner watching porn so it's a personal boundary thing I guess you know each to their own next one have you had sex in a public place 68% have said yes and 32% have said no so more of you have I never have but more of you have than haven't so if you think you're all crazy, yeah, you're actually not. Yeah, I'm pretty crazy. No, loads of loads of people do it. Just trying to make it sound shit because I've not done it. Next one. Have you gone through a partner's phone? through a partner's phone. Okay, we talked on this last week. We did touch on this. And 70%,

yes, you have. 30%, no. That is high. I obviously, as we discovered last week, I'm in the 70%. So, you know, I am the majority. So, I feel better about that. But for the 30% that haven't you're either in very trusting relationships a very trusting person or have a lot of self-control and I envy you for that I don't know why I'm saying it now like I'm in a relationship where I'm checking my boyfriend's phone I'm literally not but I have been okay have you ever fallen in love at first sight? 69% no. I'm actually surprised it's not higher than that. Do you guys believe in love at first sight? Because personally, I don't. I really, really don't. Like I proper don't. Love. Like you're telling me you love me you love me you'd die for me you've just looked at me and you love me love at first sight if you love someone you know love is it's love yeah I think

you can be infatuated by somebody and like oh my god about somebody at first sight. But love at first sight, come on. Is that real? If so, no one's ever fallen in love with me at first sight. But I would consider it a red flag if they told me they did. If they were like, I fell in love with you the moment I set my eyes on you. I'd be you didn't no back up with the love bomb okay but I'm happy for all of you that have 31% of you sounds really nice have you ever had sex with a complete stranger so I'm talking because I was gonna put a one-night stand right but I'm talking you don't even know them like you might be on a first name basis but you don't even know them you know nothing about them you've just met on this day and you've had sex with them on the day that you've met that's what

I'm talking so I had to be specific by saying a complete stranger and 37% of you have said, yeah, you have. 37% have said, yep, I've fucked a stranger. And 63%, I'm in the 63%. I haven't, I truly haven't. But I mean, nothing fucking wrong with it. If you're both consenting and you're using protection, fucking go to town, babe. Do you know what I mean? Have you had a crush on someone your bestie is

dating? Now, I thought this would be a bit higher because I think you can fancy someone, you know, and people have taste. You can have the same taste. But you know what's really funny, actually? When I look at my friendships, all all of them even like way back in school uni after uni my friendships now I have always had the total opposite type to my best friends to my closest friends isn't that interesting like I think you can appreciate like you know when they say I'm seeing this guy and they show you a picture or you know I'm seeing this girl like show you a picture and you can be like fit really fit yeah fuck yeah but I don't fancy them do you know what I mean like I'm not crushing like if I meet them I'm not gonna be like oh my god that's so fucking fair do you know what I mean so yeah I haven't and neither have what percent are we looking at neither have 81 percent of you

but 19 hope none of you are my besties voting in that poll okay well you're all my besties to be fair who fancies my boyfriend um i don't mind i find that very complimentary. Like if his friend's slanting me. Yeah, baby. Hope they do. Okay, next question. Have you told a friend you like their outfit if you don't? Well, you're all fucking fake because 66% of you said yes, you have. Now, when I was wording this question, I was wondering how to word it because in my head, I'm picturing, you know, the friends, we've all had them, right? Where they tell you to wear, so you say like, I've got this outfit or this this one they will pick the less nice one because they

don't want you to look better than them you know those friends I'm picturing this right so let's say I put a shit outfit on and you've got them friends that feel like in competition with you and you've put an outfit on that might not make you look great or you know might not compliment my itty bitties so much and a friend will go definitely that one I love that outfit look your boobs look huge I love that outfit no you don't you literally don't like it you want to look better than me but I'm asking you have you done that and 66% have said yes now I obviously didn't word it as specific specifically because I can't really I don't want to make it like a very specific situation it's going to sound a bit personal but I can imagine that it's like you know you might have taken that that question as like

well it's not my taste but you look good in it and like it's not my taste but your bum looks banging do you know what I mean? So I'm'm gonna hope that that was more the response you know I personally don't like it but they do look fits fucking it do you know what I mean and 34% of you said no if you don't like an outfit you will say I don't really like that yeah next one kind of in um kind of relevant do you feel in competition with your friends? 70% of you have said no, which is brilliant, which is a brilliant. Now I have experienced friendships where they have even said like, I feel in competition with you or like your success is making me feel like this. And I don't think it's a bad thing like I feel like it only ever comes from like insecurities and it never comes from like any dislike or like wanting you

to fail I think it's more of a reflection of like how they're feeling so 30% of you said yes and I can imagine that you know if you're not happy with where you, your position is in life, or, you know, you might not be where you was hoping you would be, or you might be envious of your friends. I think jealousy and being jealous and envying someone is different. You might be envious of your friends and therefore you might feel like in competition with them to feel better about yourself. Does that make any sense? Not necessarily like a nasty thing okay next question have you ever catfished someone so the response to this actually shocked me because I thought it would be quite high because I'm thinking I know situations where people make fake accounts to like

fuck their ex over or to see if their boyfriend or girlfriend would cheat and I I thought it would be higher than that because I've heard so many stories that I thought well it must be reasonably common but 89% of you said no and only 11% of you said yeah you've catfished someone which I'm over the moon about to be honest we all know I was catfished twice in my life funny stories aren't they to be fair okay would you consider yourself toxic now this is a bit of a confronting question would I consider myself toxic no no I wait that's a tiktok sound do you think you're toxic is it toxic no well potentially could be yeah yeah no I'm not toxic and I will stand by that I really truly don't believe I am okay but let's see you guys 28% of you said yeah I'm

fucking toxic babe I can be a little bit toxic you know we've all got our past traum be a little bit toxic. You know, we've all got our past traumas, a little bit of heartbreak here and there, a little bit of trust issues, a little bit of insecurity. It can mold us into not the most un-toxic person. That's not a word. What's the opposite of toxic? Healthy? I'm not sure. But 72% have said no, you wouldn't consider yourself toxic, which is great. Next question, do you seek validation from other people? Now, this is a bit of a confronting one because the reason I ask this is I do, I fucking do, and I didn't realize how bad I do it until recently. I had a proper chat with my mum and I was like when I look back in my life everything I've done in my life is to make other people proud of me and make other

people feel positively about me and like me and I've always struggled with people not liking me and I've struggled with criticism like you guys know I can't bear when people give me like horrible comments and stuff and I hate when people are wrong about me and if people think that I'm a certain type of person and I know deep down I'm not I can't bear it I'm like no no no I need them to know I'm a nice person I need them to know I've got a good heart and I'm like fucking hell Leah why do you need validation from people all the time so I thought let me ask people how how unusual is my brain do you know what I mean because I really do it and it's something I'm working on and I'm putting my foot down and I'm trying to be more like do you know what you know who you are and what anyone else thinks of you and your decisions in life and whatever route you take

in life what anyone else thinks of you shouldn't change how you feel about you you know that's that's the motto everybody but I feel relieved and I feel seen because 71% of you have said yeah you do seek validation from other people now I'm aiming to get in that 29% that says no I love myself I'm happy with myself everything I do is because I love it and it makes me happy and I know I don't hurt people and I know I don't you know I know I'm not a horrible person and that's all that matters to me yeah okay do you ever doubt the route you've taken in life we're getting a little bit deep okay we've gone from does size matter faking orgasms to um do you ever just question your entire life and 79 have said yes so if that doesn't make you all feel a lot better about things i don't know what

will because i think we look around us and we think oh my god he's doing this and she's doing that and they're doing this and look at them and they're killing it and we don't realize that deep down they're probably thinking oh what have I done well how have I got here this is not for me this is not for me why did I do this degree why did I move to this city do you know what I mean so yeah 21% have said no must be nice but yeah 79% we do and that makes me feel a lot better okay and then the next story I put up I said is there anything you want me to ask or anything you want to get off your chest and and then I used your questions and put them on my story with the polls so the questions from now are just some of your questions that I truly truly loved and it says have you ever been the other woman that's a big question have you ever been the other woman i as far as i'm aware no i don't

think so like imagine you're seeing someone you find out they're in a full-blown bloody relationship fuck yeah so i'm somewhere no but 68 have said no and 32 percent have said yeah you have and I'm really upset by those numbers I'm really sad and I just love you all and you deserve better than that okay you deserve to be the woman okay love you obviously this wasn't my wording of the question I try to avoid saying like woman or man and i try to say words like partner because obviously i know not all of my listeners are women so please say that with a pinch of salt that that was not my wording but i'm sure you just answered it accordingly um do you feel pressure to settle down get married babies etc the older you get. 65% are saying, yeah. 65% saying, yeah, I feel that pressure.

Yeah, I fucking do. And I do. I definitely do. Well, I don't feel the pressure to do it. I don't feel the pressure to do it. I feel the fear that I'm at the age where everyone else is doing it and I'm not in their same position. yeah I don't feel the pressure I just feel the fear of it and the fear of like I'm 25 I'm 27 next year isn't that weird maths I'm 25 but I'm 27 next year it's like I'm just skipping a whole year but it's because I turned 26 in a couple of months but anyway I'm 27 next year that's fucking approaching 30 I need to get my life together and I was talking to my mum about it and she was like I felt the same don't worry it's an age thing like it's normal so I'm trying to just take some deep breaths and realize like

I'm probably gonna look back when I'm in my 40s and go I thought I was so old do you know what I mean I'm 25 25 is so young like I'm probably gonna look back and go what the thought I was so old. Do you know what I mean? I'm 25. 25 is so young. Like I'm probably going to look back and go, what the fuck was you so stressed about? So I just keep trying to go, nothing will pass me by that is meant for me. You know, you're always on the right path in life. The universe always knows what's best for you, you know? But yeah, 65% saying you do feel that pressure. Do you ever feel like your partner deserves more than you can offer so this is kind of sad and I hate that you feel like this um but 52% have said yeah and 48% have said no so I think it's a good thing that you're saying no

because at first I thought like well if you say no surely that means like no I'm perfect but it doesn't it doesn't because it means no I I'm happy with how I treat this partner of mine why should I word it like that this partner of mine I'm happy with how I treat them you know I give my all that's all I can do and I make them happy and they make me happy but yeah 52% of you really sadly you do feel like that and that is upsetting for me because you're amazing and I'm more than good enough for your partner okay everyone um have you ever been have you ever been in a relationship and second guessed whether it is is right now are you ready for the response to this the poll currently sits at 85 percent are saying yes i have and 15 percent saying nope no i haven't so 85 percent of you have been in relationships and second guess whether it's right i definitely have oh my god i have i remember

i took a pregnancy test once I take them frequently because my pill stopped my periods so I always like to be sure you know and I took a pregnancy test and I had a false positive fucking crazy I know I took like six tests and they were all negative but I had this one that was positive but I think it was because it was really old I found it in my drawer it was probably like over a year old so it could have been that but yeah it came up as positive and the first one that came to my head is like I can't have a baby with them so yeah that to me says you're second guessing it do you know what I mean so I have second guessed it for sure um and I do think it's normal I do think it's normal it doesn't mean that like your relationship isn't right I think it's normal to just not be a hundred percent sometimes

especially when you're young do you know what I mean um next question do you get really anxious when your partner goes out so at the moment the poll sits at a 50-50 split. We've got half of you saying yeah and half you say no. So my boyfriend doesn't, he's not really like a night out guy, which is fucking stunning for me, but I've never really been like that. I've never never I've never been anxious about like cheating or anything I more get anxious because in my experience I get really rejected when they go out and and I don't get any contact no replies to my messages and stuff and that's what would give me anxiety because I'd be like wow this is a lot about you and how you feel towards me that I don't even get any contact for the entire night I don't know where you you are what time you're home and that would be what gave me

anxiety but I don't get that like oh my god what if he's talking to another girl like because I've said this million times I literally just think if you're gonna fucking do it you're gonna do it what's the point you sat at home crying about it because the chances are you're not doing it and if you are I'll find out about it and cross that bridge when we get to it do you know what i mean babe so yeah um next question do you ever feel like you're destined for bigger things than what life has offered you now 72 have said yes and 27 have said no now i will point out that's not good maths oh Oh, okay. It's just changed. It's just changed. 73% have said yes. So anyway, I think a lot of this can come down to we're so young and the greatest times of our lives, lives haven't happened yet. You know, we, I'm talking about a majority of

us because when I look at the demographics of my listeners we're all roughly from like 20s to 30s like it's in a rough demographic okay and I think we're not supposed to have it all figured out yet and so I feel like it's quite easy to feel like surely um there's more than this for me and there will will be, there will be more. So I feel like I understand why people would feel like that. So yeah. Let's do one more. Do you feel like you're just going through the motions of life and not living it to the full? We have 91% saying yes. And only 9% of you saying no, I feel like I'm living life to the fullest and that's crazy like if you actually deep that people say it all the time live your life like

live every day like it's the last absolutely not I'd be in tears I don't get that saying I do understand what you mean I get what you mean mean. You know, just enjoy it. Take life as it comes and just have a good time. But also, I don't want to live like it's my last day because that's fucking terrifying. So I don't I just don't like that phrase. But living life to the fullest. No, I'm not. I'm definitely not. I let my anxiety rule my life sometimes I turn down opportunities out of fear but it's something that I'm working on and I don't see it as that I don't see it as like oh I look at all the shit I'm missing out on look at all the years I'm wasting I don't see it as that I see it as growth I see it as lessons valuable lessons working on myself and I think you should

all be proud of yourselves no matter how you feel you're living your life you know you just gotta you just gotta be happy and proud and practice gratitude you know all right guys really enjoyed this episode if you want a part two let me know send me some questions let me know we'll do a part two I feel like it was so interesting to see what the percentages were and also very validating for a lot of us if we were in um any sort of mind frame with frame of mind where it might you might have felt like you're the only person in the world that feels a certain way so yeah very validating very fun very enjoyable um let's wrap up the episode okay thank you so much for listening to this episode thank you to everyone who answered on the polls i know they're very confronting questions thank you for your honesty

you are always safe to be honest and open in this podcast and in this friendship group no judgments we all love each other love peace and harmony that's all we need that's all we need it really is though do you know what i mean love you proud of you all you're all amazing you're doing so well keep going no matter what it is you're going through you have the strength baby and have an amazing weekend. Enjoy the bank holiday. And oh, Jess, bestie Jess, we all know Jess. She is coming over tomorrow. We're going to film an episode and it's going to be up on Tuesday. So we finally have another voice on the podcast. I'm sure you'll be pleased to hear it's not just going to be annoying little old me. So yeah, stay tuned for that. It's coming on Tuesday.

Have an amazing weekend. Be careful. Be safe. Make good decisions. Any bad decisions, send them in as confessions. All right. Have the best week and have the best weekend. And I'll speak to you on Tuesday for a brand new episode. All right. I love you.

Bye.