Leah on the Line - Confession Diaries 5: He moaned another girl's name so I peed in his kettle

Episode Date: July 14, 2022

Hi babes! Welcome back to another Confession Diaries. Oh my goshhhh the confessions in this episode are NEXT LEVEL. Keep it up. ;) Thank you so so much to every single one of my listeners, I cannot thank you enough. You are so appreciated, I promise! As always send in your confessions/dilemmas to [e-mail]. Love you! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

hello hi everyone welcome back to a brand new episode of leah on the line how are you happy friday it's confessions day baby how are you what's happening honeys i'm starving i've already had dinner this is my problem do you want to know what i had for dinner it's unreal okay so i made prawn tacos from scratch i wish i could show you a pic of it right now but basically you get like a normal tortilla like the mini ones are better but then you cut out an even smaller circle because the mini tortillas are still big for for a taco do you know what i mean so cut like a taco size circle out put it to the side get some prawns put loads of butter in the pan like loads of butter cook your prawns in it with cajun uh seasoning garlic chilies like just spicy sexy garlic prawns and then put them to the side and in that like spicy

butter that's left in the pan put your tortillas in crisp them up on both sides and then they like soak up all that butter and then they just look they look so tasty and then when you're plating it up bit of guac bit of bit of rocket salad bit of tiny tiny tiny chopped red onion and little tiny cubes of mango prawns stunning tell me that doesn't sound stunning are you gonna make it tonight i know it i know you're gonna make it so many of you have just gone oh my god i'm gonna make that tonight honestly go to audi and and get the shit because that's where I got it got it all from Aldi hun easy I think it costs about seven quid all together because prawns ain't actually that cheap are they if you think about it but whatever whatever um so yeah that's what I have for dinner but I'm still hungry because I only had I feel like when you make prawns you get like a whole

like packet of them and they just turn into nothing and you're like fuck me and i'm starving i need to eat i need to eat food no actually i'm gonna eat something but i'm not sure what what about jack sleeve and love island then hmm i've seen a few people saying that like it was so that he could get in page's head and out of sight but still on her mind like she can't think about anything else like there's no way she can crack on with adam now because he's just and also he did kind of drop the l-bomb without saying the l-bomb didn't he he was like i don't want to say it but i do she's like you do what she knew she just wouldn't hear it she's like i don't know what you're talking about i don't

possibly i could not possibly tell you what you mean jacks what do you mean and he just goes i do i do whatever hon but i will say i am so concerned for that boy's mental health oh my goodness he looks like he's hit another level of low um so public announcement public agreement i don't know what i'm trying to say here let's not spread online hate leo on the line listeners aren't haters we're lovers aren't we all of us every single one of us you you you you you you and you especially you and me we're lovers we don't we don't do online hate we don't give other people hate we don't write negative comments you can say things in private to your friends and to your family that's fine i don't mind we're human but don't don't go on social media and write hate okay we're bigger and better than that we love people but anyway it's the confession diaries and boy have i got some some great confessions

thanks to you guys being dirty filthy little sluts and i love it i'm kidding okay so i'm actually gonna start i always start with instagram because i always put a story up as you guys know saying like let me know like any confessions, like any new confessions. I always get really scared, like, oh my God, please tell me that there are more because I'm so petrified that one day you guys are going to run out of confessions for me. And then what? Then what? The confession diaries is on my front cover. I can't get back now. Do you know what I mean? What will I do? So keep, keep making bad choices guys, just for the sake of Lear on the line. Love you. Okay. So let's start with Instagram. These ones just tend to be a little bit quicker and shorter

and then we move into the longer, longer, really exaggerated stories. Okay. So somebody says, we actually had this one last week, but somebody says, I really dislike my boyfriend's mum. She is not my type of person at all yeah I mean somebody didn't listen to last week just say because she would know that we've already discussed this but I will discuss it again you know this is the difficult thing because you're not going to just get on with everyone are you and chances are that not chance are but what are the chances that that your boyfriend's mum is going to be your type of person? I don't know. I don't know what the odds are of that. So I feel like it's not that unlikely and that uncommon.

And I wonder like, does she like you? Do you reckon? This is the thing. Like, I remember when I was younger, I used to be like, oh my God, I hope his mum likes me. I hope his mum likes me. And I still do. Like, obviously, mums are everything like I love family I love meeting family this is very very very very important to me but as I became an adult I was like hold on a minute what if I don't like you do you know what I mean and then that takes pressure off but you actually don't like her which is a difficult one I mean I feel like it is what it is you know I mean just accept the relationship that you have if you can why am i giving you advice it's the confession diaries god look at me i don't like it's a tuesday um hey guys listen to this hollywood sign shit girl here remember her she shit on the hollywood sign not on it she didn't just shit on the sign. Just near it. She said, yes, we're still in love.

Great news, everybody. The Hollywood shit sign. The Hollywood sign shit girl and her boyfriend is still in love. We love you. We love you guys. I slept with a married man. He has four kids. Kept seeing him. He's now divorced. Lol. What do you mean lol? Okay. Why are you doing this? Why do you guys do this? You scare me. Honestly, you people scare me because you are what I'm afraid of when I'm married. You are the women that I am petrified of. You're the women that I lose sleep over. You are the women that I have nightmares about and then punish my boyfriend for the next day. Okay. Did they divorce because of you? That's one thing I'd like to know. Okay. Another confession. I drink glasses

of milk, whole milk, and I'm not ashamed to say it. Listen, I feel like I really need to get this across that the ick episode is very lighthearted. And listen, if you drink milk milk it's totally okay and you know especially because you lot are my best friends like you don't give me the ick do you know what i mean but if a guy i was seeing was drinking milk it might make me gag but listen it's all lighthearted fun it's just lighthearted jokes okay um okay anyway back to the sex stuff I got fingered on a beach on my first night in Turkey on holiday with my best mate. I mean, I love that for you, babe. Fingered on a beach. This is the thing. What the fuck is the thing with being fingered? Like, when you actually think about it, does anyone actually just enjoy being fingered on its own? Like, just being fingered? Just fingered solely fingers up the vagine? You that i don't i'm like oh god

fucking how fuck a teenager do you mean i just really don't enjoy it but everyone i ask like all my friends and like guys and stuff apparently i'm that's an unpopular opinion so let me know where you stand on the fingering guys um i slept with a boy I'm seeing on Friday and then with my ex after a night out the next day I don't think there's anything wrong with that if it was a guy saying that and he'd done that to one of my friends I might not have the same opinion I'm joking look you're only seeing the boy and you know Pete we all go back and have sex of our exes every now and then, don't we? You're not a bad person.

She's put a sad face. So that's why I'm giving her the reassurance because I'm sensing that she's feeling a bit guilty about it. Don't worry. You're a sexy, young, beautiful girl. What can you do? You can't turn it off, can you? My sneaky link wants a relationship. But I've slept with his brother and he doesn't know.

Ooh. That's the real, real tea. Um, I mean, yeah, imagine that, like imagine that is you, you go into a relationship and like you come around to meet the family. He's like, this is my brother. And you're like, yeah, I know I've seen his cock. It's been inside me. Do you know what I mean? That, that's an awkward one. Love it though. Um, so the first time I went to my boyfriend's brother's house to dog sit we had dirty sex on the sofa you guys just cannot keep it in sometimes can you that's what I'm learning you guys just love sex so much and I love that

for you that you're in relationships where you have amazing exciting sex as you fucking deserve but you guys will just have sex anywhere is what is what we're learning from the confession diaries um did you did you at least like clean it give it a little spritz give it a little spruce up do you know what I mean um okay I like my friend and she's a lesbian but thinks I'm completely straight. But so did I until a couple of months ago. What do I do? Okay, so if you told your friend that you feel like you may be into women, like have you told her that yet? Because if you haven't, I feel like that's a really good way to slip it in to be like, you know, I've just been having some thoughts and like, I feel like I would like to try, you know, just being with women. I'm finding myself quite attracted to them.

And maybe that's when you can be like, you know, like sometimes I look at you and I think, oh, I could probably kiss her. And then she might just go less snog or she might be like, oh, babe, let's not ruin the friendship. And then that's that's awkward for you. Good luck. No, actually, please please please do something about this and please tell us all how it goes i would love to hear a success story here but what do you do about that i mean it's exciting it could be a beautiful romantic love story but you could also ruin the friendship let's just ruin the friendship baby ruin the friendship fuck it tell me how it goes i'm so excited um i want to shag my co-worker and this is all your

fault oh my god i nearly said your name then oh my god listen sometimes it's it goes really well we've had the success stories on the recent confession diaries episodes this girl has seen with her co-worker has come out but she's still loving life she hasn't been fired yet um but honestly i think she should do it as long as he doesn't have a girlfriend obviously as long as doesn't have a girlfriend um my confession is that i think you're absolutely stunning are you single oh my god thank you i nearly said your name then jesus thank you um yes i'm single um guys i think i've fallen in love anyway next one i slept with my ex and went and slept with another guy to make myself feel better about it lol you know what you did

the you did it the other way around to the girl at the beginning who slept with somebody else and then went back to her ex i don't know what's worse i feel like they're equal i feel like who gives a shit you know what i mean did it work did you feel better about it that's what I'd like to know also don't feel bad about going back and sleeping with your exes guys like it fucking happens join me you're in a relationship with these people sometimes it's really hard to like move on and have sex with somebody else and it can feel really wrong so like that's why it's so easy to go back to sleeping with your ex so don't worry about it honestly guys just do what you got to do.

I went away with my boyfriend. He was taking forever in the bathroom and I really needed to go. So I grabbed a dog poo bag and it just happened. Fuck my life. Luckily, he never came out the bathroom, so he doesn't know. He never came out the bathroom ever. He's still in that bathroom. Oh, my God. You had a shit in a dog poo bag i mean there's so do you

know what is so funny because i think i already said this but when i told my auntie's best friend about the confession diary she went is there a load of confessions about poo and i was like yeah and she's like i thought there would be every week we just end up talking about poo and it honestly guys you're you're disgusting okay I actually don't have any poo confessions and I'm gonna touch wood because I really don't want to be in a poo disaster anytime soon do you know what I mean basically how long does it take you to fart in front of a boy because it honestly depends like it really depends with me like when do you say to your boyfriend I need a poo like when do you get to that point how long does it get how long does

it take to get there guys not I don't have a boyfriend I'm not asking for advice so I'm just curious um okay let's move on to the email confessions. Okay, let me start with this one. So basically, I got sent this the most amazing email by somebody I was going to say her name. What is it with me today? Good name, everybody. Good name drop everybody. So it's called confessions of an anonymous 30 something dating what not to do. I'm going to read out the beginning of the email. Hey Leah, I hope you're well and having a great week. Thank you. Love you so much. I'm a new listener to your podcast, Leah on the Line, and I absolutely love it. For a 30-something-year-old married woman, I wish I'd... Oh, fucking hell. I wish... Hello? Am I okay? I'm not sure. Okay, let's start this again. From a 30-something-year-old

married woman, I wish I'd have had access to something like this when I was in my late teens and early 20s. Yes, this is exactly the point. This is exactly why I did Lear in the Line, because I didn't have that and I would have done anything for it. I used to feel like I had so many secrets. I used to feel like I was so dirty and wrong for the thoughts I would have or like the questions that I would have. So I am so happy that you think that because that is, that is the point in there on the line. I love you. Okay. Your insights and outlook on life. Well, sorry guys, you really didn't need to hear this, but I'm just going to read this aloud for everybody to appreciate your insights and outlook on life would have been a massive benefit to help me through the

perils of finding my own truest self maybe i could have avoided some of the following stories the advice you give is pretty solid and you come across as such a lovely and genuine caring person the topics you cover are really relatable even to a little old lady like me honestly this was my favorite email to date sorry everybody sorry sorry everybody else i'm kidding like you're all you're all equal i love you all so much but i think she just hit the nail on the head of what i wanted to achieve by starting this podcast so reading this email i was just like oh my god yes i've done it i'm amazing i'm kidding okay so she says i've been listening to the confession episodes. They're my favorite and have decided to share some of my own date in horror stories

from back in the day. These tales are from my late teens and early twenties before I met my husband. Also, I have a pretty respectable job now, so I would really appreciate being kept anonymous. Of course, of course. I'd love to know what the job is though wouldn't you all wonder what she is what do you consider a pretty respectable job maybe she's like a teacher or like a counselor maybe or i don't know i can't i literally or like a police woman i don't know i literally can't think of anything um i've selected my top few stories feel free to use your favorite one or all of them or none of them hey it's your show and you call the shots so are you sitting comfortably then I'll begin guys is this like do you feel like this is her

show now because I do and I'm okay with it I'm okay with it so obviously I'm not going to read out all of them I can't I don't know how many she's written I just know there's a lot but I will get through them over the weeks okay because they're good they're good I to read out all of them. I don't know how many she's written. I just know there's a lot, but I will get through them over the weeks. Okay. Because they're good. They're good. I haven't read all of them. I've literally only read the second one, but I'm going to read the first one and it's called Tell One, The Catfish. Okay. I really like the sound of this. Do you know catfish is my absolute favorite program in the entire world. I'm actually a catfish genius. I know if somebody is a catfish and I will find you instantly. I'm actually a catfish genius. I know if somebody's a catfish and I will find you instantly. I will find the real person whose pictures you're using

and I will find who you are. Just give me a cup, just give me an hour and I'll find it. I'll find you. I will find you. Honestly, if anybody feels like being catfish right now, send me a DM on Instagram. I will literally get to work and I will smash it out the park. Trust me. I need to be on catfish i don't know why i'm not catfish uk hit me up do you know what i mean what were they called uber and i can't remember the life of me i only saw a couple of those episodes wasn't that weird when they did catfish uk i always dreamt of it coming to the uk and then when it did i was just kind of a bit embarrassed i was like oh fucking hell we're so embarrassing why why are British people so embarrassing sometimes do you mean but then

there was some episodes where I was like this is amazing this is so much better than catfish US why am I saying catfish US is it's just called catfish anyway I'm going to read out the fucking story now okay do you know I got catfish once should I tell you that I'll tell you later anyway I'll probably forget but fuck it let's just get back to this okay I'm gonna tell you now I'm actually gonna tell you now I got catfished twice my and my best friend got catfished so basically I will read out this tale but I feel like this is quite an interesting story this is like my confession as well so I was I was in year 10 so I was like I don't know how old are you in year 10 14 I'm always like the year below like age below because my birthday's in August so I left school at 15 so let's say I was

14 right and I was talking to this guy on I actually found him on Twitter right and his name was Ryan and his pictures were like all different people like they realistically were not the same man like it was just catfish from day one but some of the boys in the pictures were very very attractive to 14 year old leah and i think he said he was like 18 he lived in america and he was like a jerk in high school i was like oh my god like this is my Zac Efron dream like living my dream disney channel dream right so we're like I think he messaged me I don't know how we started talking about it was just on Twitter we literally just used to talk on Twitter and we were like in love like I was like I'm in love and I tell my best

friend about him and she was she was just like he's obviously a catfish and I was like I know like I know this boy doesn't exist right and then his sister had a twitter account all of a sudden and I don't know how long me and this Ryan were talking a few bloody months because we used to talk every single day okay but obviously like the time difference and stuff made it really quite difficult for our relationship to blossom he was from I don't know where in America he was from I can't remember I think it's from California classic classic catfish right and then one day his sister messaged me and was like um oh I uh I have some news I was like okay and then she's like Ryan's dead yeah I was like um what do you mean bingy what do you mean and basically I knew this boy was fake the whole time because I'd say to him like send me a selfie the answer was no I'd be like let's let's

skype obviously back in the day it was skype the answer was no let's have a phone call the answer was no it's obviously a bloody girl wasn't it um and basically I used to do the google image search and i i literally found the real guy once but i still carried on talking to him because i kind of knew but it was just sort of it just became like this joke and i just enjoyed the drama to be honest anyway she's like ryan's dead and i was like right how did he die And she said he got shot. And I was like, oh, oh dear. Okay. Um, well, you know, sending condolences, but who is this fucking person? Cause that is sick in the head. I found the real profile. I know this person wasn't real. And I know this sister account was the same fucking person. Obviously, they had like no followers followed me like it was this weird fake thing. Who the

fuck was this person? Because you're sick. Okay, if you're listening to this, you're sick, right? And then I got catfished again, by somebody else. Their name was Chase, right? And I was, I think it was like the following it was it wasn't long after ryan had been shot right i'm honestly not like joking about death at all obviously you guys actually have a quite big fear of death it's the fact that i know it was all one big made-up story that i can i can laugh about it but actually back in back in the day i was literally like oh my god like I will never find out who this fucking person was because you've just made up that they're now passed away and

I never got that I never got an answer but anyway after the um the first profile was uh disqualified the next one pops up to me I'd love to know if it was the same person it could have been to be fair and their name is Chase they're from Boston Massachusetts right sexy sexy man very sexy man right and we're chatting I think we spoke for like a year right I'd left school I went to college and then obviously I was like okay my life isn't just like a game anymore. Like I'm becoming a young adult. I'm going to let go of this fake person on the internet. Just kind of like stop talking to them. And then like years later, I got an email from this account and was like, Hey, it's Chase. And I was like, what the actual fuck? Like I knew this person was fake the whole time as well,

by the way, it was so obvious. Again, it's the classic, like they won't Skype you you they won't send you a selfie they won't send you a video they won't send you a photo doing certain things to prove they're them like they just avoid all the classic catfish questions um and their lies never add up do they anyway and they're like it's chase i was like hey chase like how are you and then they were like i need to tell you something and i was like okay and they was like i'm in love with you like i've never forgotten about you like i think about you every single day i was like whoa um and then i they whatsapped me and they told me who they are and it was a girl from south africa i was like what's this one big fucking game to you yeah this is my life you're messing with obviously Leah 16 year old Leah was just loving the drama loving the drama I was like

this is my life but yeah so I've been catfished twice by two American boys one was made up a terrible made-up lie because they used like different pictures of different people I'd be like can you send me a selfie doing like an L with your finger just to prove that they that it's you you be like and they'd be like oh my camera's broke my camera my camera's broke and I'm like oh okay like maybe you could send me just like a voice note or like bbm me and it was like no I can't I can't I my phone is broken I only have have my computer. And I'm like, oh, okay, maybe you can like take a selfie on webcam. I just got really mad and punched my webcam. Now it's broke. Like it was literally like that. And then all of a sudden they got bloody shot.

And I was like, what the hell? That's the end of our love story then. But I think deep down, it was the same girl from South Africa. I um but anyway that's my confession let me get back to the tell one the catfish okay thank you for listening to my story guys okay okay guys sorry for the weird cut but I've actually just read ahead of this story and I physically cannot read it out because I'm so uncomfortable with the things that this guy did um that I yeah I'm just really uncomfortable reading that out I can't lie um so yeah I'm gonna I'm gonna move on to um tell two I actually thought I read this one but I haven't I don't know which one I read but it's not this one okay this one's called premature ejac Love it already. I'm already interested. Okay. I was set up by a

friend's boyfriend with the lad he worked with. The lad and I were both early twenties. We went out on the date. It was awful. Okay. Brilliant. We met up with a group of his friends in his local pub and I quickly realized they were on a date with us like three of them plus me and the lad wait what what what what so you were set up you're on a date you met up with a group of his friends and you realized they were on the date with us okay right okay it was horrific I think we ended up bowling or something random I can't even remember the weather was really, which made him driving me home difficult. So I thought, well, he's not a bad looking guy. Fuck it. I might as well get good, get a good shag to compensate for this terrible shit show evening. How wrong I was. We got into bed and we're kissing,

just kissing. All of a sudden out of nowhere, he, he you know he ejaculated this is a massive ick for me and made my vagina dry up quicker than you can say sahara desert so you were making out and he just came she says i was gutted i went home the next morning and deleted his number no thanks buddy that weekend i spoke to my friend's boyfriend when i saw him out in town i told him how awful it'd been and he was smirking so apparently according to this lad he'd ridden me all night long made me scream his name etc blah blah blah i was mortified and made sure to set the record straight. I even, I never even touched his dick. Just a bit of a snog, then puff. I was like, ew, absolute loser. Oh my God. Okay. That has to be the most brutal confession I've ever read out on the podcast. That is brutal. That is brutal. I kind of feel sorry for the guy I

mean what bit of a dick by making up this big story being like yeah we fucked up now and like she was she was going crazy like bit of a dick move to just make shit up like that you know what I mean but um yeah that was brutal babe I look forward to reading more of your dilemmas i mean confessions over the weeks okay next one i had a sex dream about my housemate's boyfriend um i'm okay with that to be honest about my house oh wait no no no no i just processed that as about your housemate fuck okay yeah i mean it's just a dream. As we said last week, Maura said, I once had a dream I was cheers by giant tomato. I was cheers by giant tomato. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? It doesn't mean anything. It doesn't mean she wants to sleep.

Trabbing. Trabbing for a tomato. Do you know what I mean? She's not, is she? Okay. One time I was sleeping with my friend with benefits to quote okay okay one time i was sleeping with my friends with benefits and to quote my doctor my she's put emojis here and i can't see what the emojis are but i'm gonna assume it's my vagina rejected his penis i bled everywhere and had tons of clear liquid flood from my vagina all over his bed throughout the night what and we woke up in a pool of it in the morning the following week i fainted three times from the damage his dick did to me it fucked my body over wait what your vagina rejected his dick i mean if that's not the universe telling you that is not, he is not the guy for you. I mean, your friends are benefits, so you're not exactly trying to

fall in love with him, but listen, that's a sign. Okay. That's an actual rejection. Your body is rejecting that. Not even your mind. Wow. That's insane. Has anybody ever heard of that before? I haven't. that is crazy, new fear unlocked, imagine you, oh my god, imagine, imagine you were getting to know a guy, he's perfect, you love everything about him, you laugh together, he's so attractive, like everything is tick, tick, tick, tick, your fucking fanny rejects him, the pussy's like, no, no no girl you'd be like fuck imagine imagine that that's really interesting i did not know that was a thing i want to look that up but oh my god i hope you're okay jesus fucking christ are you all right that's scary um i slept with two guys in magaluf sea one

night like a threesome or like you had sex with a guy in the sea and then you went and carried on with your night and then you met another guy and was like hey do you want to go have sex in the sea because i like both i like both stories to be honest um i had a drunken threesome with two of my best friends and we've still not spoke about it it happened three years ago listen as we've discovered on the confession diaries the drunken freesoms are a very common regular thing you know and i'm here for it to be honest i'm here for it okay let's do one last one this is a reasonably long one so let's go for it hayley i love the podcast and thought i'd share this kind of gross but funny confession love it love it love it one time i was seeing this guy

we dated a couple of times and one night i went to his flat to hang out and ended up staying over but nothing happened as i was on my period but most of the night he kept telling me how much he liked me and wanted things to be serious between us we watched a movie and went to sleep but it was so hot in his flat i led there wide awake only to eventually hear him moaning another girl's name in his sleep fuck me that is very fucking awkward um instead of waking him up i just got up got dressed and left the bedroom okay queen that is it head held high leaving with your dignity do you know what i mean shoulders head chin up we're leaving no if you're sick if you're having sex dreams about another woman i'm going to remove myself from the situation because i'm bigger and better than that

yeah not the wake the fuck up who the fuck is sharon hmm who the fuck is sharon and what is so fucking great about her in that dream right anyway carrying on i got up got dressed and left the bedroom oh guys remember when i just said everything about how she's like head held high like chin up like being the bigger and better person like leaving with her dignity yeah forget everything i just said okay listen to this i decided to pee in his kettle before I left and drove home and blocked him on everything. I hope he enjoyed his cup of the next morning. Wash his mouth out. No. Do you know why it's so funny? Because I was really bigging you up for just not actually reacting to it. Did you piss in his kettle though or you chatted shit do you mean do you believe it i actually think i believe it i'm not even joking some some of you girls are

crazy i mean i feel like if i was pouring water and it came out a funny color i'd know but to be fair depends how hydrated you are because it boils it as well so boiled wee pouring that into a cup of cup of tea like especially first thing in the morning i don't know if you would notice so you probably did have him there oh it's gonna make me feel sick i wonder if he would notice because you've got the flavor of the tea haven't you so you know how obvious would it be i'm not sure i really i really don't know oh my god it's fucking crazy you guys are crazy you guys are crazy and i love it honestly what a funny episode i've absolutely loved this week i hope these confessions never

stop it's a huge fear of mine honestly a fear if these confessions stop i've got nothing i'm nothing without you honestly so so much fun thank you for listening to my confessions and my catfish stories how funny um if you are the person that behind that was behind those profiles please do let me know i would love to know um and yeah um i love you guys what are you up to this weekend i'm gonna be in london actually i'm very excited i'm so excited to spend some time with my auntie I love just hanging out in London my auntie's really good company so whenever I can I'm gonna make an effort to go up to London and chill out because that's my happy place you know what I mean like just hanging out in London with my auntie I'm also thinking I can try and pop down to my old work see my old friends while i'm up

because i don't know again another happy place and the weather's stunning do you know it's 36 degrees in london next week yeah okay parade for me because that is just vile yeah do you know that do you know that 36 degrees no need is there no need for that level of heat do you know i remember when it was like 0.5 degrees away from beating the uk's record for like our highest temperature to date it was 38 degrees and i'm pretty sure the record was like 38.5 ow i've got shooting pain in my chest imagine I have a heart attack live on air this would not be live this episode would just never air because I'm the only one that knows how to put this up so if this goes up then everybody knows I'm okay anyway carrying on so we all know I'm okay

um I was rehearsing for a show called it was actually Rent the musical and it was 38 degrees honey and I was in Mount View which was a drama school no i wasn't at drama school we were just using their building to rehearse and um holy fucking shit is that building hot on a normal day yeah and we were up like on one of the higher floors and the the the rooms are like fucking greenhouses and we were rehearsing rehearsing rent isn't a dancey show but anyway we had days of dance and then you'd come outside because you'd be like fuck me i need some air come outside and you're like and you it's claustrophobic you're like you want to get out of your own skin it's horrible and that's what i'm about to experience on Tuesday. Well, I'm not rehearsing for a show.

I fucking wish I was. Wish I was. Sick of it at this point. Fucking sick of it. Fucking sick of it, mate. Anyway, God, I really just went off on one there, didn't I? So, hope you guys have the best weekends. Do whatever you want to do this weekend. Go out, stay in, see your friends, see your family, be on your own, whatever your body is asking for, listen to it, give it that, you deserve it, you're gorgeous, you're stunning, you're amazing, you're funny, you're talented, you're kind, you're generous and you're a Lear on the Line listener which means you're a good person, okay, because we're all good people here, all send me a message any thoughts any dilemmas any

confessions lear on the line at gmail.com or go over to my instagram at lear on the line click the link in the bio and yeah honey bunnies so when jack's came in and my little tick box went tick tick tick tick tick tick tick i cannot tell you the amount of people that I get daily telling me I look like Paige. I really don't see it. I really don't see it. Listen, I'm okay with it. I think Paige is a gorgeous, beautiful, stunning girl, but I'm okay with it. But I just really genuinely hand on heart don't see it. So it's quite interesting for me. But yeah, huns, I will speak to you on Tuesday as always and have the best weekend get drunk if you if you're a drinker and if you're going out have the best time be safe cover your drinks with your hand

yeah not getting fucking spiked um don't text your ex text me instead all right have the best weekend be safe be smart make bad choices for the confession diaries only all right love you guys um take care speak to you on tuesday all right i love you