Leave A Message with Ally & G - 48 - Long Distance Relationships... Can They Go The Distance?

Episode Date: January 29, 2025

Happy Chinese New Year! Here at Leave A Message HQ we're celebrating the incoming Year of the Snake with an exciting announcement... right at the beginning of this weeks episode! On this week's episode, our Bridget's are tackling long-distance relationships head-on. The highs, the lows and how to navigate them. When is the right time to decide to move in together? Ally & G dig into when to know if it's the right to move for your partner and how to navigate those conversations. Elsewhere - which of our Bridget's thought it was a good idea to see a guy who still lives with his ex?! How many times does a red flag wave? There's a riddle in there somewhere... Tickets for Leave A Message LIVE at Underbelly Boulevard in Soho go on sale on FRIDAY (31st Jan) at 10AM (UK)! Visit @allyandg on Instagram for all the details. Want to be a part of the group chat and featured on the pod? Send your voice note to https://wa.me/message/LLWFXNK4YXMHE1 (and please, don’t leave out ANY of the juicy details). NOTICE: Any advice provided in this podcast does not, and is not intended to, constitute professional advice or guidance; all information, content and materials presented are for entertainment purposes only. Any injury, damage or loss that may result from the consumption of this podcast is at the sole responsibility and risk of the listener. Follow Ally & G Instagram: @allyandg TikTok: @allyandg YouTube: @allyandg Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Oh my God, this is so exciting. It is at the Underbelly Boulevard in Soho on the 21st of March 2025. Make sure you're following us on our socials for ticket info. Because we want to see you there. Happy Chinese Year, gong hei fa choy. Lots of things happening today, Wednesday the 29th of Jan. Gong xi gong xi gong xi ni ha. Gong xi gong xi gong xi ni ha. Oh no, the ha.

My mom said this is bullshit, but I don't know. Make a renda xiao xiao. What? She thinks that bit's not right. Make a renda dwe li. Make a renda xiu xiu. Gong xi ni hao gong xi. What she thinks that is not right? I've got a task for you this year. Come on.

Why don't you learn a little Malay? Oh Malay? What's your mom speak? I mean Cantonese. Your mom speaks everything doesn't she? My mom speaks Cantonese and Malay but like her whole schooling was in Malay. It's mad actually. I kind of did forget that.

I think you could just try. We were talking about it the other day. I was like, why would you not have talked to me? It's so frustrating to not be bilingual. She was like, Malay is a really... She's right. Cantonese is a really useful language. I know. You could be in a K-pop band or something. I know!

They don't speak Cantonese, do they, in Korea? I could be living my best life in Shanghai. But yeah, you could be an international businesswoman. I agree. I agree. And she let you down there, actually. Oh, I can say a couple of things in Malay. Go on.

Tak maw gula means don't want sugar. Classic you, that's a good thing to say. Ke bao means buffalo. Oh, ke bao! Ke bao. And then that would mean there's buffalo time. Sulamat Datang means welcome. Say that again. Slamat Datang. And what is Happy Chinese New Year in... Oh in Malay I don't know. In Cantonese. In Cantonese it is...

Seng Nying Kway Le. Oh good. Seng Nying Kway Le. Gong Hei Fat Choy. This year is the year of the snake. Snake. For all the snakes out there, it's your year. It's your year, go get them. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Actually, last night I was looking at the characters. So if you're turning, it's every 12 years. I really get into this. I really so deeply believe in the Chinese zodiac actually. Maybe even more than, yeah, maybe even more.

Because I think it makes more sense that like the year that you were born in would like determine things more than the month. I don't know. I don't know because I have this like conversation with people all the time. You know, non-believers when you're're stuck near a non-believer. Non-believers, that's so dark. The worst, and I'm stuck near them. I mean, I've dated loads of them and you have to convince them.

And my main thought process on the conviction of horoscope is that it just makes so much sense that the time at which you were born in the year would impact the kind of person you are. I just don't understand how that's not obvious to people, but they're obviously like, bullshit. This is why I believe in the amalgamation. Like, what star sign are you? Like, Western star sign. What year were you born in? What month were you born in? Tourist?

Sorry, you're a tourist. You're a tourist rabbit. If you go and look up a tourist rabbit, it would be the most specifically precise. You're right. It's the kind of duality of the two that really does make it quite specific, quite scarily specific. What about your big three? Do you think that plays into it or no? Probably. You can probably search your big three and your Chinese zodiac. And then you're probably looking quite Rihanna-esque. Like quite specific to you.

Yeah. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But then also if you met another Rihanna, as in if you met someone that had exactly the same four, you would probably be similar kinds of people, depending on your upbringing, I guess. Yes, yes. Because that is going to have a huge impact.

Anyway, I just wanted to quickly say... Please do....that this is the Weir of the Wood Snake. Oh have a huge impact. Anyway, I just wanted to quickly say... Please do. This is the year of the wood snake. Oh, a specific snake? I think it's metal, wood, fire, and water is the last one. This is like earth, wood. Yeah, earth, yeah. We just came out of the fire dragon.

That's why there was a lot of mental shit going on. That's why I had to get Judy tattooed on my arm. Right. The wood snake is about shedding. Oh, I like that a lot. Releasing. Like think about a snake sheds their skin. It's all about leaving behind.

Are there things you need to leave in 2024? Yeah. Negativity. Things that don't serve you. Yes. And the discomfort, I suppose. Maybe that's what you could channel with the snake because snakes shed their skin. God, that's so hard to say.

Snakes shed their skin quite easily, effortlessly. Whereas actually, as a human being, when you're trying to become like 2.0, 3.0, a new, like, updated version of yourself... Gosh, it's so hard to shed that skin. Very hard. It's very hard to kind of... Clicks onto you. And to get everyone else around you on board.

Like, no, no, guys, I don't do that anymore. Or like, no, no, I don't. Yes. People please say, I won't say yes to everything anymore. Like, yeah, it's hard. Oh, and also people will see you how they want to see you. Like, you can do all the convincing, all the boundary setting, all the change, but until it benefits them or serves them to see you in a new light,

they just keep you the same. People just box you as they box you for 20 years. Yeah, and it's really hard to shed. Well, everyone, get shedding. It's time. We can't be stuck in our old ways. No, no, no, no, no. No, no. If you're listening to this today, on Wednesday,

today we're also going to the BJ premiere. Oh, my god. BJ? Bridget Jones. Sorry. I feel nervous. I feel nervous just thinking about it. I feel gassed to see Hugh Grant up close. As soon as we've done the carpet, I will be on Cloud 9

running around like a kid in a candy shop because if I get to see any member of that cast... I will die. Do you know I queued at the Bridget Jones... Like at the... Okay, it wasn't even the Bridget Jones premiere. I was obsessed with Bridget Jones when I was younger, but I queued at the... I think it was Letterheads? Leatherheads, that film that Renée Zellweger was in.

But my mum knew she was coming to the premiere in Leicester Square, so we came to London from Cheltenham and I queued for maybe like four hours to just get a look at Renee. And my mum tells this story every time because George Clooney is also in the cast. And my mum like at every dinner party she's ever at, she'll be like, George Clooney held my hand and looked into myself. Is that real? He did, to be fair. But I was there for Renee and Renee like hardly even did like the fan wall.

George went up to everyone and I literally just was there. I must have been like 12 just staring at her. It's actually quite problematic that as such a young child I resonated so deeply with Bridget Jones but I did. I read the books, I watched the films, I knew I was going to be a Bridget Jones character in real life and I am and I just I'm yeah I'm gassed. Emma Thompson's going to be there guys, Leo Woodall. Also babe listen about the carpet, we're talking about shedding. It's just like 30 seconds. I know.

And it's just a couple of pictures. Like, they don't define who you are or who you are. I know. I've got to start finding it funny. I just don't. Do you know what I mean? Like, it's just a photo. I know.

It's just such a weird environment. Yeah, of course. Like, it's so bizarre. Of course. But then it's so funny because I act in it. So like, I'm also like ogling over like, Renee Zalwiga. So it's like, you know, it's, I. Of course. But then it's so funny because I act in it. So like I'm also like ogling over like Renee's Alwiger. So it's like, you know, it's, I like to look. Yeah.

I just don't like to be looked at in that setting. Yeah. I guess. But no, it's going to be really exciting. I can't wait to watch the film. I hope the weather's good because those things are so shitty. If it's raining. It's going to be freezing.

That's fine. Freezing is fine. Pissing with rain is... Poor little Renee. Oh babe, don't worry. Did you not see Ariana and Cynthia with their army of umbrella holders? Yeah, true, true, true. And they didn't have a lot of warmth. They were wearing not a lot. Also, did we have a drink last time? I don't think we had a bev.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, we did. We had a very strong tequila lime soda. Yeah, sorry. No, no, we'll have a bev. A strong bev. Although actually, is it at Leicester Square, at the Big Odeon? I don, no, we'll have a bev. A strong bev. Although actually, is it at Leicester Square? The Big Odeon. I don't know that you will have a bev. Why?

It'll be a water and a popcorn packet. No, no, before. Oh, before. Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, we go to that hotel and have a bev. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I did that last time before it ends with us with Fran. That's better.

I had a, I think I had a margarita. Yeah, that's what I'll be having. Strong. Yeah, strong. Spicy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you need like a shot. It's quite serious. Shall we do the intro?

Let's. Welcome to Leave a Message. This is the podcast for the Gallies by the Gallies. It's a new year, so you might be joining us afresh. If you are, welcome in. Sorry, can I interrupt you? What do you actually do on Chinese New Year? Is there rituals we should be doing?

You would give like... The coin. With a red envelope. Absolutely right, babe. rituals we should be doing. You would give like, normally you would just have the up-how. The coin. Yeah. With the red envelope. Absolutely right, babe. Well, because I learnt last year because Sheila gave me one. And then like, if you were really-

And what did I get, £24? Last year because it was 20. Yeah, so this year you'll get £25 actually. Come on! Half way to 50! Sheila! Less Queen! And then like, when we were in Chinatown,

you can like, there's an amazing festival in Chinatown. There's like the- Why are we not going? We're in Bridget Jones. Have you ever seen the like, no, but it will be on the weekend. Have you ever seen the like dragon? It's like a-

Yes. The way the people up, that's the- Yes, because when you're in primary school, you go and watch it. Yeah. And like, I remember when we were kids growing up, like where we live in Malaysia, we would sit on the top of the car and the whole streets, it's just so colourful and it's music and

the dragons and it's just like… You need to go back for Chinese New Year one year. And then you sit down and you just have a really nice meal. Okay, 2026, where are we going for Chinese New Year? Good, we should go to Hong Kong or something. Absolutely. And you'll be fluent in Cantonese by then? Yes. Great. Yes, I will.

Brilliant. Sorry, carry on. No, but listen. By the galleys or the galleys? If you've just joined us, welcome in. This is a podcast where we basically get your voice notes every week and we listen to them, we love them, we love you and we try and give you some advice. Advice is strong. I know, we always say advice, but we need a new word because it's more like...

It's more like participation in the group. It's observation. Listen, this is a group chat. That's what you need to know about this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's an open forum. Like, no one's right, no one's wrong. We're not even the admins, by the way. Rihanna's the admins.

Rihanna's the boss. Don't blame me. No. Big boss Rihanna behind the camera. And every week we give the galleys a name. And this week the galleys should be called, oh it should be something like... Bridget. Oh Bridget.

Come on guys. Come on. That's why she's the boss. Hey galleys, just wanted to leave a message and get your advice. I'm 31, which by the way, my 30s have been way more fun than my 20s. So don't get scared, Allie. And also, please stop calling me old.

My boyfriend and I have been dating for 10 months, which in your 30s, time switches. It goes in dog years. So now it's like 1.5 speed. Our 10 month relationship is really more like a year and a half. So we met on the hinge. There are a few good ones still out there. Don't give up G. And I plan to marry him. I have told him this. It's not behind his back. We're on

the up and up. He just got a new job across the country. He's gonna be moving in a couple of months and I want to go with him but he is a little cautious because I've never moved away from home and my friends and family and he's never lived with a partner before. So he's moved away from home and my friends and family, and he's never lived with a partner before. So he's moved away from friends and family a couple of times, and I've lived with partners before. So we're kind of swapping roles here. He's super thoughtful and caring.

He's mostly concerned that I'll get sad or resentful, kind of an eggs in all one basket situation. So he wants to take it slow, start long distance, and then kind of see where it goes. I'm looking for any advice that you might have about temporary long distance, how to communicate about moving in together for the first time, and all of that super fun

grown up relationship stuff. You two are my faves, plus Rohana, Richard, and Pori Piat, of course. Thank you for listening. So much love from Michigan. Yes, she loves the whole of Crowe, Michigan. When you said, I don't know why, I just assumed you were in the UK. And then I was like, baby, you have moved from home. But you live in America, so now I'm on board.

Well, thanks for your message, babe. It's such a different ball game. Like, living across the country in America is different to living across the country in the UK. Like, we're talking flights. Like, five hours to an American is pretty quick. Living across the country in America is different to living across the country in the UK. Like we're talking flights. Like five hours to an American is pretty quick. Fine. Yeah, I guess your concept of travel is different.

Because to get from one side of the country to the other is like a full 10 hours. It's mad. Yeah. Okay, there are a couple of things here. When do you know when to move in with someone? Good. And long distance. Yeah. And timing. Yeah.

Because I know you said you've been together for 10 months and that I get it like when you're older and you are talking about marriage and kids and that stuff comes up really early, it is different. But at the same time, I think both the options of being long distance and moving in together early on when you don't know a 360 of someone. It's not just moving in, it's moving your life across the country for someone. I think actually the sad thing is that that could then be a downfall of your relationship when it didn't need to be.

Listen, I think, how long? Ten months, right? Yeah. More like a year and a half. That is still early. You know, you want to, like, one day, I guess they said to each other, like, you're the one. This whole thing about resent, I do really think holds weight because if you move your life for someone

and, like, you are doing it for them and because of them, and, like, you're going to uproot your whole life away from your friends and family. I don't know about your job, but like it's a huge sacrifice to make for someone. Imagine then he's in the office 12 hours a day, you never see him. You'll be like, well, I moved here to spend time to be with you. And this is exactly what he's saying is that like, then you're going to get resentful because like, I'm still going to like work. I think you have to take, like, I think sadly, inevitably you are going to get resentful because I'm still going to work. I think you have to take, like, I think sadly, inevitably,

you are going to have to do long distance for at least a second. I would try, try first. And I think within that time, I think you should really focus on the place, wherever he's moving, let's call it New York. That's not close to Michigan, is it? No. Oh, actually, I didn't know. I've just said that. You just said that with your chest.

And do you know what the idea is? I think it might be like three hours. Oh, that's not too far. Well, I've just made that up. It could be. What's the furthest state away from Michigan? Oh, like, must be... I don't know.

I actually don't know. I don't even know where Michigan is, east or west. Couldn't tell you. From Michigan. Is it Michigan near Canada? I'd put it on being northeast. Yeah, yeah, yeah, north, north. So let's go south, south.

Texas. Texas. Houston. Hawaii. Hawaii. I mean, listen, if he's moving to Hawaii, go with him. So I would spend time, let's say it's Nashville. OK, he's moving to Nashville hypothetically. I

would say whilst you do this stint of long distance, can you find things about Nashville that excite you irrespective of him? So can you start thinking about things that you could do there that you wouldn't be able to do at home? Jobs, opportunities, experiences. Because I think if the place excites you, it adds an extra layer to the moving for them. Also, you'll get that anyway though, because when you go and see him and stuff, you'll get that buzz. And you'll start to learn,

like what do you like about it, what don't you like about it. Because, oh, you might hate it. But this is the thing. And then that is a problem, because if I'm using my past relationship as my reference point, there's no way in hell I ever would have moved to the place that he lived even though it was four hours away

from me. That was never an option for me at this stage in my life. Forever. That's a stumbling block because then it's like, well, there's only one option here, you move and if you don't want to move then... So I think you have to figure out a world in which you could move there without him. Of course you're moving for him. Yeah. But can you kind of create a narrative that helps? But also, if it comes around to it, can you with your chair say,

I don't resent him for making me do this? Yeah, like exactly. So it's not really that he's making you. Yeah, it's kind of you've chosen. You want to go, irrespective of this. Yeah, like exactly. So it's not really that he's making you. Yeah, it's kind of chosen. You want to go irrespective of him. Yeah. Tips for long distance. Oh, don't do it.

I'm a huge fan of long distance. Like I really, really, I think every, I think if we're trying to reframe, I think it can be one of the healthiest things that you can do for your relationship because it forces you to be independent. Your baby, your situation was so, so niche. But why? Because like he was, he went away for three, four months.

Yeah, a hundred percent. But what I will like challenge you on in that is that you then have this predicament where when you do spend time together, it's hard to maintain your independence within that quality time. And I found that really difficult. So if you're seeing each other for a weekend, it feels like all that time needs to be dedicated to them. Yeah, which it kind of does. I know. And that's such a lie. It's so tricky.

But like the ratio of that to the rest of your life, like if you were to do that two weekends a month. Yeah, of course, it's a sacrifice either way. Yeah. Of course. It's just obviously easier when they live near and they slot into your life more easily and you can see them for dinner and not even have a sleepover.

But I think it also makes you question them more. Do I really want to do this for this person? Are they worth it? Yeah. Because like, when they live around the corner, it's very easy to just slip and fall into a relationship and marry someone in your 30s in a year and a half or two years without really challenging, is this person right?

Also, you're right. Like communication actually in long distance relationships can almost be better. Oh, a hundred percent. There's a lot of conversations that are way easier to have over the phone or over text even. And you know you always have simmering time. Also, it's really nice to miss someone. Yeah. I mean, like, I obviously never have that anymore.

I... Damn it. Imagine, she's just been away for 10 days. Never had a date with him. Yes, you did, don't lie. Okay, I thought about him. I'm not pining after him for after 10 days. Like, three, four weeks, we'll do that to you. Do you know what I mean? And I'm like,

Listen, I was like, Yay, we're gonna cuddle him. But like, I'm not like sitting in my bed thinking about Ror after 10 days. I suppose you've been together for a really long time, decades, basically. But I think, like, listen, if you're going to do it, what I'm trying to do is for you is trying to find the silver lining of it. Because there are actually a lot of silver linings, in my opinion. Yeah. I have not done this. I think the keys, though, are like really clear.

Like, before he goes, you have to set a parameter of how often you're going to see each other. How often you're going to, like, who's going to fly when. Also, how you communicate, because some people, for example, aren't really texters, but you might find that, like, feels like radio silence. But then you might be a phone caller. And that communication becomes as important as, like, quality time when you're together.

Because if you miss it, you can go a week and someone hasn't known what's happened in your life at all, and then they become less familiar to you. And you almost have to do it like date night Thursday, like we will sit down and eat dinner on FaceTime, kind of almost like that. Especially when you're working, I doubt many people are texting throughout the day if they've got a full-time job. So make sure that you, but you have to have that conversation before. Yeah. And then my other piece of advice would be like, there are so, like G's saying, there are so many like cute romantic things that you can do for someone from far away that

you actually can't do when you're next to them. Like sending a letter or like sending sexy pictures or like so many things, sending flowers. Or like utilizing like hotels, that's really fun. You know when you like, I know it's money, but you meet halfway. And like, you would never do that when you're like dating in the same city, really. You might go on a little mini break eventually, but like, it's like you can create adventure in it. Yes. Just the only thing I would say, and you've said this before,

I would never enter into a long distance relationship before if I didn't have an end point I was just about to say so in this instance It might be you moving there because his job might not have an end point But I there's no way maybe as well like before especially because that you've got Your eyes are so open in this situation. You can be like in a year or in six months We need to sit down and talk about it again. We evaluate Yeah Yeah Like in a year or in six months, we need to sit down and talk about it again. Re-evaluate. Yeah.

Yeah. And like you need to have really clear markers because otherwise two years could go by and then you're like, what are we doing? Yeah. Bridget number two. Wait, can I just ask one really quick question? Yeah. What, when, how, you didn't really tell us how you know when you're ready to move in

with someone because I've never had that feeling before. So what is that circumstance? A bit, it is a bit of circumstance. Yeah yeah, because sometimes you need a bit of a push. Cheaper rent is what you need. Especially when you're older, sacrificing your space is so fucking intense. I don't think I'm going to be able to do it. I think it's when it becomes a point where you're like, listen, if I don't move in with him, what is this?

Why would I not? Okay, I'm going to have to share a bathroom. Get two bathrooms. Two bed, two bath, that's all we're buying. I do think it's just a feeling that's the most unhelpful thing to say. But you know, sometimes, I mean, obviously, I've never had this with anyone else,

but you're like, oh, I really want to like lie on the sofa with you on a Sunday morning and not have to think about like going back to mine and then like that small hassle. Whereas in the beginning you're like, I can't wait to get out of here. Yes. Yeah. I can't wait for a little breather. Yeah. Yeah. When you don't feel that way anymore, I would say, but it could take years. Oh my God, babe. Good luck. Good luck. Don't rush. Just take your time. And also babe, what is meant to be will be if you're not meant to be with him and it doesn't work, it will happen that way.

If you're meant to move to Nashville and live your best life, it will happen that way. I really do believe that. It can really also, long distance can be a blessing in disguise of like, it's the best test you will ever get of trust, of communication, of like actually how much you care and love them. Yeah. Try one or try our full Tim Selec lineup. Terms apply. Prices may vary. At participating restaurants in Canada. It's time for Tims. Before we continue with this week's episode of Leave A Message...

If you want to be part of our group chat, make sure you leave us a voice note using all the details in the episode description. Now, this can be about anything. Obviously, sometimes we ask you for specific topics, but if you've got a story that you think girls need to hear this, then get voice noting. Bridget number two has two parts. Ooh! Hi, girlies. Love the pod. Your work is up there with that of the good Samaritans. Thank you. I'm going to try and relay this really complex scene as coherent as possible, so

please bear with me. Over summer 2024, I was seeing this guy for like a good few months and through him I met his best friend, Greg. When I met Greg, it was at a club, very low key with this other girl. This girl spoke to me, I didn't speak to Greg at all, because I was too busy shagging his mate. This girl spoke to me, she didn't speak to Greg at all, so I was too busy shagging his mate. This girl spoke to me, she was like, yeah, I've been with Greg for six years, like Greg is my boyfriend. And I was like, good for you girl, like, you know,

good, great. I left the club with the guy who I was shagging, not Greg, the guy who's his best friend. He told me that they're not together, okay? That's the beginning. So a few days pass, I stopped seeing the guy because it just kind of goes about Greg Text me like let's meet I want to see you Whatever long story short we've been dating since

September right and In the last few weeks Shit has hit the fan. Okay, he lives with this girlfriend that's not his girlfriend, right? And she's found out about me. And basically, he told her he loved me. And now, even though they're broken up, they still live together. He's blocked me on Instagram. He can only text me at certain points in the day so that she can't find out that he's on

his phone. It's all very weird, right? Greg also tells me he loves me, that he's going to marry me, that he wants to spend the rest of his life with me, but also I'm blocked on Instagram, so like we can't even send each other reels. I don't know what to do. Like am I being a fucking mug? Because I do really like him and I think I love him. No, I definitely love him, but I'm not like in love with him. It's like this is kind of icking me out. The fact that he lives with his ex girlfriend.

By the way, they broke up two years ago. Oh my god, party. Oh, I forgot to mention, they're all like in the same friendship group. So the guy I was seeing is best friends with Greg. Greg's girlfriend's best friends with all of them. Like they're all a big friendship group. They're all like together at Christmas

because their families are friends and it's all like a serious thing. So even if there is truth to the fact that they're no longer together, I'm still entering a very complex situation. They've got so much lore as friends and as past girlfriend and boyfriend. It's just like, is it fucking worth it? I'm not getting anything from this. I just feel like he's kind of lying to me and saying that he loves me just so that I won't leave because it's like he's kind of got the best of both worlds.

Like he's got this girlfriend who's not his girlfriend, but I don't know if I believe that. And then he's got me who's another girlfriend that's not his girlfriend and he's getting... I don't know what he's getting from either one of us apart from the fact that his ego must be fucking massive. I don't want to let him go, but also I don't see any kind of future if he's still living with his ex-girlfriend. Please help me, please. Oh, babe, I've got a lot of question marks. Listen, okay, I'm going to sound savage.

I'm going to... I'm at the risk of sounding like a total savage bitch. Whoa. If you were my friend, I would shake you until you had sense. I'd wake you, shake you, smell the bacon, smell the coffee, babe. I don't know what the fuck you're doing. You must look alive. I just think you know it.

Look at you. Look at the length. You know all the red flags one by one lining up like in a row. Perfect red flag. Ten for ten. And you're still there saying, what shall I do? Well, what you should do, babe, is you should press the big red button and exit the room. Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

What is... Okay, please. What if Greg's great? Doesn't sound like he is, babe. No, listen. A liar, for a start. Well, is he? Because the girlfriend now says they are broken up. But he also lied in the beginning when they... When he originally texted her text her no because Greg said

It was her the ex-girlfriend that said that they were still together Yeah, so Greg didn't say okay The girlfriend was being like we've been together for six years la la la Greg was like we're not together and they weren't they were Just living together and I'm guessing it was a very sticky tricky situation. They must have been in some kind of 18-month contract I don't know what's going on there. I was going to say, but like he did withhold the information. A four-year contract. They did that in COVID.

I'm just saying, Greg, I'm kind of, I'm not on your side, but I'm just spitballing for you. I don't want to be defending you. But in COVID, these people started doing very long rental contracts. These people out there, the estate agents and the landlords, to tie people in, they started doing these long, long contracts. So Greg and his ex might be in a tricky sticky, can't get out of jail card. Bridget, listen, she only found out months later

that they were living together because obviously he did tell her. Yeah, but you're not going to say straight away, hi, my name's Greg and I live with my ex. You should. Thank you. And she's a wacko-taco and she's blocked my Greg and I live with my ex. You should, thank you. And she's a wacko-taco and she's blocked my Instagram and she doesn't either have to message you. No, he's blocked her Instagram, so that's why she can't say the rules.

Greg has blocked her because Greg is like, yeah, I know, trying to neutralize the situation. The situation is volatile. There's no neutralization for Greg. It's a live wire, Greg. Greg's in trouble. Also, Greg, the one thing that's like irking me about Greg is that he's snaked his mate and slid in.

That's the one thing that's irking you. Not the one thing, but like, I just think, Greg, get a grip. There's a million people in the world. Why are you finding... I would say that to Bridget though. There are a million of them in the world. Must you chase Greg? This sounds like a toxic situation.

Listen, I think unless Greg is like the one and she's already said, oh yeah, yeah. You can be bothered to sit down and be like, listen, Greg, when's the contract up? Because that's not working, is it? I'm not going to come around to yours when I can't even send you a reel. Like unless he's that, then Al's right. Obviously, you're going to be like, oh, Greg, thanks for your time. But like it is too much for me. Goodbye. Just in like devil's advocate. Oh, here we go. Then Al's right, obviously you're going to be like, oh, Greg, thanks for your time, but it is too much for me.

Goodbye. Just in like Devil's Advocate. Oh, here we go. Come on. Takes a village. So what if you could be friends with the girlfriend? You could just be like in the big... I don't really like big friendship groups,

but if you're into that... I was going to say, easier to have no friends, exit. You could just integrate into the big friendship group if you wanted and just be friends with her. You could move in. I don't know. I'm just thinking modern woman. Maybe you might enjoy that relationship. Modern woman is, I understand, but that's not a very good way to protect your own peace. I'm creating a commune is what I'm saying with Greg, his ex and my ex from the summer before. What fun.

I think sack it off, babe. And I really mean that with my chest. Sounds too complicated. And you know, you know it. Although, babe, as we get older, I know that you're, you know, all secure over there. But as we get older, we're going to start dating people that are going through divorce. Marcel on Love Island. I know!

Marcel on Love Island is currently in a divorce. You might still be sharing the same house. I know friends. I've got friends who parents, we would go over for dinner and it'd be like, oh, your dad's here because they weren't together, but like they live together. Not everyone can afford a second home or to move out. No babe, don't discount me. You never know, divorce could come at any time. This is what I'm saying, right now you're feeling uncomfortable.

No you're right. Someone might want to date you and Rory might be in the next room because you haven't yet figured out where to move to. And who's going to get the money and who's going to get the house? I'm just saying, we might need to become a little bit flexible in our older age. Okay, flexible is fine. How old are you, babe? So many questions.

No, but my point is, like, listen... No, it's not ideal, listen, I know. If you're not me, ideally, exit. This is the thing, if you're not actually bothered, like, you actually don't sound that bothered about Greg. If you don't want him to, like, father the four children that you want to have in ten years, because... I'd say, what's the point? We will say this again and again and again until you bitches start listening.

This is the most important decision you could make. Oh my God. Every relationship expert on the planet will always say, actually not just relationships expert, like business people will say the most important decision you ever make is the person that you choose to spend your life with. Of, don't pick someone that's withholding information. That is lying to your face. I would have lied to you if I was Greg.

Just saying. I would have just said. First date, I wouldn't be like, oh, BT dubs, I live with my mental ex-girlfriend. First date, but I wouldn't wait three months. And I definitely wouldn't be trying to say, I love you, I want to marry you. This, I forgot to say, bad. No, I want to marry you. This I forgot to say, bad. No, I loves you in the past three months. No, not happening, Greg.

Take that back, reel that in. Should we do a round up? Yeah. Bridget number one. Good luck, babe. Listen, you've got to... I think it's exciting. Think of it as a new chapter. Yeah.

Weather apart altogether. And long distance requires a lot of forgiveness. So get your forgiveness hat on. I know. A lot. And patience. Patience and also like, stupid things become important, but you have to like respect them.

Like if he says he's going to call at eight and he doesn't, that sounds petty when you're in a normal relationship and I'm going to see you tomorrow. But in a long distance relationship, that shit adds up. So you just have to be ready for the petty to become a bit more than that. And the way to combat that, I guess, is over... There's no such thing as over communication. You're right.

Like, you have to both be very good communicators. It's really important that you call me at eight. Like, really that matters to me. I've not gone out to stay in. Not just, can you call me eight? Yeah. Yeah. But good luck.

Good luck. So exciting. Also, if you're going to Nashville, could you get me a pair of cowboy boots? Obsessed. I'm gagged, actually. You're gagged. Sorry, I'm gassed.

You're gassed. Who's gagging you for cowboy boots? I'm gassed. I'm gassed. You're gagged. Who's gagging you for cowboy boots? I'm gassed. I'm gassed on cowboy boots. And Bridget number two. Big red button, exit, French exit. And to be honest with you, I wouldn't even bother explaining. No is a full sentence.

Goodbye is also a full sentence. No is a full sentence is so good. I do not know that. I need to get that written on my face. Say less. Say less. Listen, I don't need to explain. Greg, we all know you're in a bit of a mess. I don't want that. I need to get that written on my face. Say less. Say less. Listen, I don't need to explain, Greg. We all know you're in a bit of a mess. I don't want to be a part of it.

So yeah. Pretty much. That's it. That's it. Shall we do Question of the Week? Let's. Great. Play the jingle, Rich. Holtz was in the other room yesterday and she walked in and she was like, sorry, being on the other side of the wall to you is like being in an asylum.

And I was like, why? She was like, in the space of 10 minutes, you've just sang Kanye West, a Christmas carol and I want to dance with somebody. She was like, what is wrong with you? And I was like, I don't know. Why did that? But alas, I did. Right. I always say waking up in G's head must be like, la la la.

I'm like Snow White in the forest. She like wakes up and she's like, la la la la. Like so airy fairy in her head. La la la. Right. Get serious, babe. Sorry, I'm back.

We're getting some advice for Bridget number two with the question of the week this week. Have you ever been in a long distance relationship? It's quite a split on the yes and the no. I can believe it. 57% of people have never. I thought it would be more rare, but I guess there's always times in life like if you've been with someone through uni, jobs, whatever. And then we've asked them for their experiences. So I'm going to read a few to you just so that we can get the kind of like lay of the land with the girls out there. Oh dear. First one I can see, dumpster hell fire.

Oh dear. Oh dear, okay. Oh, terrible, like absolutely awful, right. Wait there babe, I'm just gonna sift through and see. Oh, we stopped having anything in common. Didn't end well. Don't let this put you off. Awful, oh dear, this is bad. Okay, here we go, Ryanair, singly-handedly keeping my relationship alive.

That's nice. Good. That's nice, the Ryanair's getting involved. Good. And actually, Ryanair, maybe you could do some long-distance deals. Oh, I've got a good one. Go on. Weekends become more special.

Me time during the week, good communication is needed. That's good. That's realistic and nice. Oh my God, this is bad guys. Oh no, here's a good one. It teaches you healthy habits like having your own life separate to them, how to self-soothe, etc. Oh my God, he cheated on me the whole time.

This is what I was saying, made me realize I didn't miss him at all and we broke up, thank God, best decision ever. That's what I'm saying. It's shit, do not recommend, guys, this is not good for you. It's a good test, no, no, no. But listen. He went travelling for three and a half months. FaceTime helped.

Our relationship is stronger now. Here we go, here we go. Evie. We were long distance for two years. We now live together and I love it. There you go, Bridge. That's better. Met the love of my life in Paris. He's Irish, so now I live in Ireland. Married with two kids. What we're going to say from this, I would say, is that it's going to be hard. It's going to be hard.

But if you're meant to stay together, you will. Also, listen, I said this the other day, pick your heart. Mmm, pick your heart. It's hard to be in a long distance relationship. It's hard to live with someone. Pick your heart. It's hard to be married. It's hard to get divorced.

Pick your heart. It's hard to work hard. It's hard to not work hard. Pick your heart. It's hard to be married. It's hard to get divorced. Pick your heart. It's hard to work hard. It's hard to not work hard. Pick your heart. Wow. Wise words from Ali Mack. Okay. We've got to get out of here.

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Oh no we won't. Yeah we will. No we won't. In a few EPs. In a few EPs. At 50. Love ya. Love you guys.

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